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tocomplainfriend · 5 months

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YOU DIDN'T WRITE ANYTHING SIMILAR TO BOJACK BRO! BH has so much structure and essence, it is insane. Specially after S1, the intelligence in those BH scripts is nowhere to be found in HB. In helluva, There are these tiny good things that get murdered every other episode. Things that sound better as concept-than how you developed it. There are so many great jokes that aren't based on saying "dick dick whore fuck", so many of their animal characters work for actually smart animal jokes. Or the tongue twisters! YOU BARELY LET CHARACTER BE BAD PEOPLE. Every social issue they suddenly have a sad pass and their dad was mean and that JUSTIFIES EVERYTHING? Bojack H literally goes against that so hard is impossible you think this way if you understood Todd's speech, or Bojack's interview or the last two fucking episodes of the series. All the main cast also feels almost empty of bad qualities that aren't uwu justified by the plot and writing. Certain things stop just being explanation of characters and how they came to be. It sounds more like you gave your characters a bunch of shitty we are in hell traits + things that you didn't even recognize as problematic. AND TRIED TO SAVE THEM IN THE WRITING as just flaws- or making something else happen to the character to be like "Oh they have it so difficult! They just didn't get taught how to love right" When they are being abusive toxic fucks instead.

I legit believe all of Herb story had something so strong to say about queer issues, then Helluva. Like he literally comes out to BJ, kisses him later on and immediately dismiss it. -And then he gets arrested by the police for having gay sex -as public indecency. Many conservatives complain about it cause Herb ran the Horsing around show, saying "it is a show for children people like him shouldn't flaunt around their alternative lifestyle and ruining America"

(Read the sings LMAO) All of this in the 80s to 90s

Also, this guy's comments

"So, here I am, being your mother, which I know is giving you all sorts of mixed-up ideas about gender, while your brain is still loose and stupid. Just remember, if you become a queer later in life, this isn't my fault! Don't you sing no songs in your nightclub act called, "My Daddy was My Mommy," while gazing longingly at a tangled string of pearls... Pearls are for ladies, Bojack. Pearls are for ladies."

AND THIS GUYYYYY HELLO? They have multiple episodes, including Todd's sexuality- but not all the episodes nor his personality revolve around that! He even made a dating app for Ace people with his girlfriend!

I already have 3 "Bojack Horseman > Helluva Boss" post in this account!

#vivziepop critique #helluva boss criticism #vivziepop critical #helluva boss critique

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nineinch-nailgun · 3 months

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I fucked this up so I ahd to reedit it AUGH

Weird pet pt 3

So, it's been a month now and you still have that thing in your basement. Lord knows why you haven't set it free or called the cops but it's too late now. The mimic you have locked in your basement had proven to be... kind of stupid. Maybe it was young and an inexperienced hunter but everytime you went down to feed and water it, he would just stare. No attempt to attack or chase, just stare. His eyes were piercing like a Phineas Gaige flagpole. He was patient too, if you considered foaming at the corners of the mouth while watching someone come down the stares with raw ham patient, that is.

Tonight is special, well not really. You got a raise recently at your dead-end job and thought you'd use your first extra hundred to get something extra for the massive beast that lived in your house rent free. As you sauntered down the steps you could practically hear the drops of slobber that plopped on the ground. He stood at his full obnoxious height- roughly around 7ft. He stared intensely as you got to the last step and place the food down on the 'meal towel', as you called it. You always made sure to take off the shitty plastic wrap- and you poured the water into the large bowl you'd gotten him. He honestly lived like an animal- but he didn't seem to mind too much. Compared to other mimics this could be considered the life of luxury, he gets to sleep and eat all day. No hunting, no running from human groups that want to kill him, no need to find shelter, and best of all it comes at no cost to him. He's practically spoiled, and wouldn't last a day out in the wild. You backed away from him and watched as he threw himself at the ham, devouring it like he'd not eaten ever in his entire life. He got to have more than just one tonight, and it was a little more expensive- and given how he ripped at it he seemed to think it tasted better too.

You suddenly remembered some of the things you'd left in your car from him, and decided to go and get them. You quickly drove yourself up the stairs, closing the basement door behind you. You got outside and opened the back of your car. Comforters and pillows. Your poor... beast mimic pet thing had to sleep on the cold hard floor while you learned to be more comfy with him. Now you'd went out and got him some nice cushions so he could maybe feel more at home- how domestic! You carried the rest of your spoils back into the house, cutting wrapping off of different things so he wouldn't try and eat it and choke and die. You weren't sure how smart that thing was but he seemed intelligent enough. You made your way back down the stairs and found he'd already finished his food. He stood there contentedly, eyes shut and he swayed a tiny bit. Oh yeah mimics have a whole... "digestion mode" thing. He heard you though, and lazily opened his eyes. His perpetual smile was still eerie despite his comatose like state. Although he perked up at the sight of the blankets and pillows you had tucked under your arms. He watched as you made your way to his usual sleeping spot, a towel here and there. You sat down the pillows and blankets- attempting to make a nest for him. You wanted to maybe try and appeal to his animalistic nature, give him something comfy to sleep on but also something that he was familiar with. He peered at you from his spot rooted on the floor. He wasn't moving anytime soon, but he did seem to enjoy watching you set up something so thoughtful for him. He didn't turn his head, just gave you some side eye. Once you felt satisfied you got up and pulled away, admiring your handiwork. You started to walk away, getting ready to retreat back upstairs when you heard him whine a little. It was pathetic. All his sounds seemed to be pathetic though. You looked at him and his half lidded eyes were a little wider now. He made a lazy attempt to reach for you, but didn't try too hard. His arm dropped back by his side. It was unclear what he wanted but you decided to stick around, if only for a moment.

Ok so it had been more than just a moment. More like several moments turned into minutes turned into what felt like hours. Although it had only been like a minute and a half. He had shut his eyes by now, and something about his tired demeanor made you feel a bit safer. He wouldn't bite the hand that feeds him would he? So for whatever God forsaken reason, you sneak forward, and hand extended towards him. His eyes open ever so slightly, but he doesn't move. Soon enough you're within "grabbing and killing" distance- but he makes no move once again. You don't know what the fuck you're getting yourself into at this rate, but your extended hand touches his arm.

Naturally you flinch away, he didn't seem to mind though. He watched curiously as you reached for him again, brushing your fingertips with his forearm. Slowly your hand wraps around it and brings his arm forward, sliding down to his hand. You inspect his claws, and watch his face cautiously, looking for any possible threat. But no threat shows itself. He's just letting you inspect him, in fact he seems just as curious as you are. He stares down intently as your hands hold his. Eventually you feel embarrassed and pull away, his fleshy arm falls to his side and he watches with a little strain as you back away towards the stairs.

He seems almost disappointed, but you don't notice. You crawl back up the stairs towards the living room of your house. Maybe he was a mimic with the brain of a trimming. Im not complaining though, he hadn't eaten you yet- so that was certainly a plus.

#mimic vita carnis #vita carnis #mimic x reader #monster x reader #monster x human #mimic #brooo

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rey-jake-therapist · 5 months

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The Lying Detective, self hatred and acceptance of abuse

There's something I need to let out of my chest about Sherlock and this episode in particular, cause it's the one that really opened my eyes about something very important regarding Sherlock: he hates himself. He really does, and because he hates himself he believes he deserves all the abuse he gets from the persons he loves.

At some point he says he believed he thought he was an idiot, because Mycroft kept repeating he was the smartest one when they were younger. That was until he met "ordinary people" and realized he was actually, you know, very smart compared to others. And yet, he kept believing that Mycroft was way above him in terms of intelligence. He accepted it, and because he accepted it he trusted him to know what was better for him. And Mycroft, in return, felt entitled to let him believe that Redbeard was a dog and not his childhood friend, and to hide him that he had a sister, who was also a murderer, who had let said friend rot in a well. He felt he had to do it because he didn't trust Sherlock to handle the truth. He thought he was what? too stupid to understand? Too sensitive?

Now don't get me wrong, I love Mycroft as a character, and I know that he did all that "for Sherlock's good", but at the end of the day, lying, manipulate a child's memory and repeating him all the time that he's stupid was textbook abuse. And Sherlock wouldn't have accepted to be called stupid, and would have probably seen that Mycroft wasn't THAT intelligent if he wasn't so deep in self-loathing. But then how was he supposed to love himself if he was always treated like the "slow one" of the family by his own big brother?

When Molly slapped him not once, but THREE TIMES, because he was high, again he didn't flinch, didn't protest. It's not an attack against Molly, I understand why she was upset at the sight of the man she loved destroying himself, but my point is: he could have considered that it wasn't her business, he could have told her to stop. But again, if someone he respects like Molly believes he deserves to be slapped, then he does.

Now John. Sorry guys, that's the hard part I have to say out loud. John was an excellent friend up until a certain time, no argument. One could even argue, and be right, that Sherlock was the abusive one for a while: he treated him like an idiot -but then Sherlock thinks everyone's an idiot except for Mycroft, ruined his first date, unintentionnally (or not) ruined several of his relationships by being obnoxious around his girlfriends, played dead for two years instead of confiding in him like any good friend would do, made him believe they would both die only to hear him say good things about him, I mean... Sherlock's definitely not an angel and for quite a long time, he was rather a shitty friend too. I guess growing up without friends, not even your own sibling will do that to you, but it's an explanation, not an excuse for being an asshole to everyone.

And yet John accepted him as he was, and always forgave him, so of course Sherlock came to idealize him like he idealized Mycroft, for different reasons of course. For the record, I love Sherlock and John's relationship/friendship/bromance/romance/whatever it is. Up until TLD at least I found it... precious. Yes Sherlock was an ass, more than once, but he acknowledged it, and showed he wanted to be better: he not only apologized, but he also grew to become a better person, someone who would be worth of John's affection.

What happened in The Lying Detective, though... what the hell happened? So John was sad because he lost Mary. Understandable. Even if popular theories like to claim he never loved her, his despair and the fact that he keeps her ghost with him all the time said it loud and clear: John loved Mary, very much indeed. And he was mad at Sherlock who he considered responsible for Mary's death. It was also understandable, if Sherlock hadn't shut his big mouth, yada yada... Ah I love to see a a female character fridged so two male characters can suffer and grow thanks to her sacrifice . But then what we know... happened, Sherlock was high as a kite, to the point he was very close to losing it completely he lost it completely, he took a scalpel and John, well, stopped him. But then John lashed on him. He BEAT HIM UP LIKE A PULP, which was at this point completely unjustifiable because Sherlock was no longer a threat, and he would have maybe killed him in his effort if two male nurses hadn't stopped him. But this post isn't about John and his disturbing lust for violence, not really. It's about Sherlock.

What Sherlock did? Nothing. Not one time did he try to defend himself. He took all the hits, didn't ask John to stop, just once again... Accepted. He accepted that he deserved John's violence, even said John was entitled to do that because he had "killed his wife". And Joh doubled down, "yes you killed my wife". But HE knew it wasn't true. Sherlock didn't, though. He was sick because he felt as if he had killed Mary herself, and that's why he was so adamant to grant her her last wish. As someone who hated myself for a long time, I totally recognized the impulse to take the blame for everything bad that happens. That's what Sherlock does, all the damn time.

Violence between men is often glossed over because the old say "boys will be boys". After all it wasn't the first time that John beat Sherlock up, he had done it after Sherlock came back from the dead but it was just for laughs and giggles then, "haha so funny John assaulted him three times, look his noise's bleeding, lol", and also the audience thought that Sherlock deserved it after all, so... it was fine, sort of. Notice that there too, Sherlock didn't try to fight back and didn't ask John to stop. Like, I still don't undrstand why John punched him the last time: because he told him he missed the thrill of the chase? What was wrong in saying that? Except that it was probably true? I'm personally never comfortable with the normalization of violence between men on TV especially when only one is actually fighting the other, but that's just me I guess.

In TLD it was very different. It wasn't funny, and it was certainly not ok. And I was very upset when at the end, not only John didn't apologize to his best friend for physically abusing him, but Sherlock was the one comforting him at the end. The man had almost been murdered by a serial killer, before that his second role model beat him like a pulp for a crime he didn't commit, and he was still the one being strong for John.

I have a big problem with the way this matter was handled, because John's violence was just.... forgotten. And if it had been the only time that he had expressed his anger against Sherlock with his fists, I'd agree it was just a bad moment in their relationship even though he'd still need to apologize for making it ok. But here there's nothing that tells Sherlock that John won't do it again; nothing that guarantees that the next time Sherlock will upset him, John won't lash out on him again, and it will be acceptable because for some reason, violence against a man is somehow ok.

The idea is, I suppose, that there's no power imbalance like there is between a man a woman. If Sherlock wanted to fight John he probably could easily win, he's strong and has enough fighting skills for that. That's not the problem. There IS a power imbalance in that Sherlock will always believe that John is entitled to be mad at him, thus to beat him up if he wants. And since John apparently never apologized for assaulting Sherlock, I have no idea if he realized how wrong it was, and if he intends to change. I don't know about you, but personally I thought texting a woman in secret from his wife wasn't a big deal compared to what he did to Sherlock, and yet that was the only thing that, apparently, John felt guilty of.

Sherlock really broke my heart when he told John that by saving his life, Mary had given it a value. Which meant, basically that before Mary's sacrifice, his life had no value whatsoever, at least in his eyes. Let that sink in for a minute.

"The Lying Detective" is a very fitting name for this episode and for Sherlock in general, because Sherlock doesn't just lie about being almost killed by Culverton Smith, he constantly lies to himself.

He did it when he claimed he fell back into his drug habits "for a case" -if he wanted to attract the press/Magnussen's attention on him there was a lot of things he could have done, he did it all his life about being devoid of feelings and emotions, did it about the reason why he literally offered his life to Culverton; yeah he wanted to "save John Watson" and honor Mary, but it was also about ending his own suffering, a result he hoped to get at best by catching Culverton Smith, at worst by dying.

No wonder why when Eurus challenged him to choose between John and Mycroft, he chose to kill himself. That's actually strange that she didn't see it coming. Probably she didn't know him as much as she thought. He made that choice because he thought he was the one deserving to die. Not Mycroft, not John, not even Eurus... Of course it was also a calculated risk, as he had understood at this point that he was the only one Eurus wanted to keep alive because everything she did was about him for some reason. But I truly believe he would have rather pulled the trigger and shot himself rather than killing Mycroft or John. I saw once someone claim that Mycroft knew Sherlock would choose to save John anyway and that's why he wanted to make things easier, but I think nothing's further for the truth. Sherlock would have never chosen. It would have always been him.

#bbc sherlock #self loathing #the lying detective #emotional abuse #physical abuse #john watson #mycroft holmes #molly hooper #sherlock holmes #sherlock season 4

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columboscreens · 1 year

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watching ransom for a dead man and a bit :( about the "working for a woman" comment! any thoughts? would love your insight - not sure whether it's him being legitimately Sexist or it's part of him trying to buddy up to the attorney guy for info and failing

luckily, columbo is too intelligent for that brand of sexism.

best trial attorney eh? hell i'd kill my dumb boring husband too. oop sorry sir did i say that out loud

he's not quite trying to "buddy up" to her secretary per se, nor does he actually feel this way. here, he's trying to gauge the man's reaction/opinion of her in order to both find out more about her as a person and supplement his working theory that she orchestrated the murder. columbo does that often--he asks questions in roundabout ways that disarm people, make him appear dumb/impotent (important!), and are usually more conducive to getting answers than asking point blank, answers that are sometimes as subtle as shifts in facial expression.

here, he actually doesn't fail the info check--his hypothesis is reaffirmed. a full-fledged male lawyer in an era of burgeoning second-wave feminism not only doesn't mind working for a woman, he's happy to and extolls her skill! columbo is right to assume that this man is an outlier for his time and ask him his opinion by opening with a negative assumption. would he have gotten the same enthusiasm if he'd asked more directly? likely not.

columbo is also aware of how foolish the question sounds considering the woman behind it. Lady Lawyer Leslie breaks stereotype after stereotype, establishing herself immediately as a highly independent woman of her time: she's childless, a pilot with her own airplane, and in 1971, three years before women could open credit lines without a man's cosignature in the US, considered one of the top trial attorneys in the state of california. she's cold, calculating, daring, and most importantly smart as hell. columbo totally drops the act to tell her that, which is saying something.

when you spend so long investigating a sexy lady murderer who's just as genius as you are that you close the case in total awe of her

so his little remark does not reflect his actual beliefs.

there are times when columbo will push the bounds of chivalry and step into more benevolent sexism, treating women especially gently with extra care and attention, sometimes even acting more susceptible to their wiles than he actually is. he admits his own bias:

must be nice to prety ladie...

but he has no reservations nor presumptions about any woman's ability based on gender. morals aside, he'd be a pretty shitty detective if he did. imagine how much worse at his job he'd be if he were closed-minded!

hheh...maybe prety ladie is innocent after all...

#columbo #ask #ransom for a dead man #their chemistry still gives me the shakes i swear to god #peter falk lee grant dream team i love you #feels good to make another big boy post. hot tip: dont be busy. hot tip 2: have energy

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thegreymoon · 3 months

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The Story of Minglan

I am so upset about Buwei's death but very curious about what is coming next. Since this is a c-drama and they can't have an immoral Emperor on the throne as an endgame, I suppose that the Yong family is going down one way or another. Let's hope they take the Qi household with them, especially Princess Pingning.

Team Prince Yan!

***

Yawn.

My lack of sympathy for this woman and her whole family cannot be overstated.

***

Did any of you care whether other people lived or died?

Fuck you both.

And the best part is that his stupid ass thought that if he was to whine in front of the Emperor about Minglan, this useless man would grant him the marriage 🤣🤣

***

He has already forgotten that she beat Buwei to death because of him, smh, and they are back to business as usual.

Human lives literally mean nothing to either of them. I wouldn't be able to forgive her if she murdered a pet hamster to hurt me, let alone a whole human being 😡😡

***

Hopefully, he will be lucky enough not to meet you in his next life.

***

Oh, boo-hoo.

How terrible for your mother and you that your delusions of grandeur are just that. Delusions. Classism is hell of a drug.

I hope you get squashed.

***

Do it!! Please! Make my day!!

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LMAO, WHAT HARMONIOUS RELATIONSHIP?

You have literally had people raped and kidnapped, and very likely murdered. And here you are, threatening to murder more. The cognitive dissonance, I cannot 🤣🤣

***

Oh, yes, your daughter is going to be so happy in this marriage 🙄

Sooooooo happy!! Everything a loving parent would want for their child 🙄🙄

They are all literally insane. Unlimited power and wealth have rotted their brains.

***

That this needs to be spelled out for him is just 🤯🤯

And, like, we don't even go as far as Consort Yong. His own shitty mother could and would do this if he was to somehow elope with Minglan. This is also why there is absolutely no chance the Sheng family would allow this marriage to happen without the Duke and Duchess of Qi fully onboard and Minglan would never do anything that would jeopardise her entire family, such as run off with him without their permission.

***

MTE, Qi Heng, I fully agree with you on this.

Why anyone would bother to even cross the street for your worthless ass, let alone bloody their hands to get you, is very much beyond me.

***

LMAO, YOU ARE A USELESS MOTHER!

He is not a "thing", he is a whole human and you are talking about marriage here, an entwining of lives. How happy is she going to be, married to a man who resents her? Who married her only because you threatened to kill his parents and the woman he loves? Are you serious? OK, I can buy that an endlessly indulged princess will have the brain power and impulse control of a toddler and may not be able to see the full consequences of this, but what is your excuse? Moreover, what is your husband's excuse? All of you have worms for brains.

***

I'VE BEEN SAYING!!

Why must you make me agree with Qi Heng, smh?

Anyway, I can't wait to watch Zhu Yilong in something else. No love for this particular character but he's really fantastic, very subtle and very expressive.

***

Oh, thank god.

Hopefully, now Minglan can let him go and go back to being her usual intelligent self. This doomed side ship has been getting on my last nerve.

***

What the absolute fuck are you talking about, Gu Tingye? I thought you were supposed to be smart and looking out for Minglan!

Yes, please kidnap a fucking Imperial princess and see how well that works out both for the House of Qi and Sheng!

Why is everyone stupid all of a sudden?

***

How is Yuanruo the one speaking common sense all of a sudden?

Gu Tingye, what the fuck is wrong with you?

#the story of minglan #tsoml spoilers #tsoml ep28

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saltygilmores · 4 months

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THOUGHTS WHILE WATCHING GILMORE GIRLS: S3/EP6: TAKE THE DEVILED EGGS Original Air Date: Nov 5, 2002

Links to all previous episodes can be found in my Pinned Post.

Pre Opening Credits Filler: Lorelai and Rory are sorting junk mail . Of course I had to google whether or not "Shreiber's" was ever a real catalog. Google results were inconclusive. Lorelai's Poconos shirt is really cute.

Post opening credits sequence: A town meeting.

Miss Patty and Babette are too good for this world.

I love seeing Luke smile. As the entire room rises to exit, Taylor instructs them not to leave and everyone immediately listens. I will never understand how he has this much power or why Luke dutifully attends every one of thse things.

Stefon from SNL voice: This hot new club, Stars Hollow Town Meeting, has everything. Animal cruelty, blind obedience, women who pick up dates at funerals, politicians dunking on neurodivergent loners, protest supression.

(tac·i·turn /ˈtasəˌtərn/ adjective (of a person) reserved or uncommunicative in speech; saying little.)

Pretty rich for Lorelai to be dunking on loners when the guy she's in love with has no friends and her daughter has one friend.

At least the loner must be intelligent. Evidenced by the fact that he doesn't waste his time in town meetings. But seriously...imagine you're this guy minding his own business just trying to buy some books and enact political change with protest so the mayor-type-guy calls everyone in town together to dunk on how weird and creepy and quiet you are behind your back (see also: Jess, who was also a child. And who also has to endure shitty comments about not being talkative enough).

Is Kirk the only neurodivergent person in Stars Hollow who is allowed to be himself?

With our powers combined, we are our the Neurodivergent And/Or Deeply Misunderstood Outcast Super Squad! Kirk! A guy who talks to mailboxes! A quiet guy who likes books! Another quiet guy who likes books! Town Troubador! Rory!

Look who else is way too smart to waste his time at a town meeting. His precious whacking off time is over, Luke is heading home, and he is outta here.

Now, let's say the Gilmore Girls in-show timeline lines up with the air dates of the episodes (which it tends to do much of the time). "Teach Me Tonight" aired April 30th, 2002. This episode aired on November 5th, 2002. 6 months and 6 days prior to this town meeting. Rory's not-even-broken arm has healed. Lorelai, kindly...get the fuck over it and shut up. Lorelai: when did Jess get a car? Luke: None of your god damn beeswax. Luke had no idea Jess had a car.

I always found it interesting that Jess was raised in the city his whole life, but knew how to drive. Many (but not all) New Yorkers get around on foot or public transportation and many never even learn to drive at all. But there's just no way Liz was a New Yorker who had a car that Jess could borrow, she wasn't helping him practice, she wasn't paying for lessons with an instructor, and before he arrived in The Hollow the only life he knew was getting around on public transport and walking. We come to learn he knows a bit about car repair as well. And he's only 18. Definitely not saying it's implausible or unbelievable that he knows how to drive. Far from it. Just something to ponder. Jess is scrappy. He finds a way. Lorelai has the absolute fucking audacity to tell Luke "You needs to get a handle on Jess" because he wasn't aware of this car purchase. How about you get a handle on your perfect child before she sleeps with her married ex boyfriend and steals a boat huh. How bout them apples.

OMG OMG.

Narrator: Lorelai Gilmore was in fact, not sorry for equating a 6 month old minor car accident that caused a hairline wrist fracture with 1st degree murder, and she would not butt out now or ever again.

#gilmore girls #denise rewatches gilmore girls #salty is Lorelai Gilmores number one hater #salty rages #gilmore girls season 3 #anti lorelai gilmore #luke danes #miss patty #babette #taylor doose #TDDE #Take The Deviled Eggs #Salty Rages #blood pressure rising

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worriedvision · 2 years

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A haitham fic where he keeps giving really lusty looks towards the reader but it's that damn subtle that the reader thinks they're seeing things, or sth like their friends who are with them laughing when the reader talks about haitham, someone they are attracted to, giving them flirty looks bc 'why would he want you lol'

Gender neutral reader, it landed up not being suggestive, however the friends are really shitty. Reader is mentioned to be the 'smart one' of the group.

You were a student that decided to take some time to go to Port Ormos with your friends who insisted it was a must go. You didn't exactly see the appeal at first, it just looked like an area that hiked up prices when they spotted someone vulnerable enough to take their word for it when they claim something is of high value.

Your friends seemed to fit the description that these vendors looked for, them assuming these people knew more than they did. Thankfully, you could look at said items and call them out for being cheap products. There's the price tag that clearly shows a fraction of the price they just mentioned, oh and this is is a poorly duplicated product. The vendors stopped trying these tricks with you around, so your friends took you along wherever they wanted to go. You did find yourself rather bored, but there was a man you kept seeing out of the corner of your eye.

A rather handsome man, if you would claim so yourself.

You saw him give you a look that you thought you were just making up yourself. One where he's clearly interested in you, and it wasn't purely your intelligence. That little smirk you could have sworn was there for a split second, and the way his eyes seemed to eye you up before he stopped when your friends asked you to come along. The first few times, they don't even see what caught your attention.

One of your friends spots where you keep looking when they're trying to get your attention, and they start giggling at you.

"He is attractive, _." Your friend jabs lightly, you turning to face them. "You're the smart one, not the cute one." They continue, turning to gesture to your other friends.

"I can be both. Those two terms are not exclusive." You defend yourself, not taking your friends comments.

"Well, I don't think you have a chance with that guy anyway." Your friend brushes off. "Focus on yourself, not him, 'kay?" They smile, their tone sickeningly sweet.

You furrow your brows, not taking any of this.

"Where do you get off talking about me like that?" You huff out, truly not happy with how this friend was treating you.

"I'm just telling you the truth, it's not bitchy." They say, rolling their eyes.

"No, that is bitchy." You stop them, beginning to walk back towards Sumeru City. "I'm not taking this any more. It's obvious you're all interested in them as well, and I don't have the energy to deal with jealous people."

You hear your friends call out, them saying that they needed you to be the brains of the group. It's then you realise that they genuinely thought you were physically unappealing, and they kept you around to make them look better. You had enough of being used for other peoples gains, and now you were determined to truly focus on yourself. Now, you didn't have anyone holding you back from pursuing the topics that required more time than you could manage.

Haitham doesn't know about this interaction, and he keeps looking for your face amongst your friends. Not seeing it, he can't help but feel disappointed. Perhaps you were unwell, maybe you wanted to do something else other than stop your friends from being scammed by vendors. One of your more confident 'friends' approaches him, and a part of him hopes they'll tell him where you went.

Nope. They ask him out, sprinkling in how 'strong' and 'manly' he looked. They bat their eyelashes, only making themselves more desperate looking for a date. Haitham turns them down with a simple 'no' before he keeps looking for you. He overhears a vendor starting to upsell one of your other friends, and he decides to help just this once.

His presence alone is enough to stop the vendor, who can't even look him in the eye and try to brush it off as a silly joke. This friend of yours pretends he did this because they were waiting for a date, but his unimpressed look cuts through them.

"Where is your smarter friend?" Haitham asks, catching your friends off guard.

"Uhh, _? Really, you could pick anyone, but you go for-"

"Where did _ go." Haitham stops them, not wanting to bother with some flirty comments sprinkled in with answers that didn't answer his question.

"We don't know. I think they just went back to their studies, figures since that's their bread and butter." Your friend finally answers Haitham, who manages to hide his disappointment.

"Oh, well good luck then." He simply states, turning before he feels someone hold him back. Turning his head, he glares at the friend who was persistent with him.

"Who did you keep looking at, by the way?" The friend asks. "You kept looking in our direction, and I think you fancy one of us."

How did you get such bland friends, Haitham asks himself. These people were laying it on thick, not to mention they were not the smartest tools in the shed. They didn't even seem like good people, not caring about where you were right now.

He doesn't even dignify them with an answer, shaking off the hand and promptly walking away. As he walks away, he remembers the name.

_, huh? Perhaps he could find you without the help of your friends.

#al haitham x gender neutral reader #haitham x reader #haitham x gender neutral reader #al haitham x reader #al haitham

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an-odd-idea · 11 months

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A huge part of growing up for me has been the idea that just because it happens doesn’t mean it’s normal or to be expected, and certainly doesn’t mean it should be like that, and there are ways you can at least attempt to change it. I put up with a lot of things as a teenager because I just kinda assumed that was how friendships or whatever worked, and it literally did not occur to me that maybe that friend was just being kinda shitty. Like even saying, “I get really uncomfy when I hear you say things like that”, I wasn’t afraid to speak up, it just legitimately never crossed my mind that that was something a person might do. So if you’re in a similar spot, hear it from me, you can tell people if something bothers you, or you can remove yourself from a situation, or do any number of things to try to change what’s going on instead of just accepting it as par for the course- those are options that exist

(I was a very intelligent child, but that doesn’t mean I was smart) Or, really, I just hadn’t seen people do that before, with my extremely conflict-avoidant family. We all kinda learned this at the same time when I was like 18 and my parents were old enough to be parents of an 18-year-old, so even if you’re a full grown-up, it’s never too late to learn

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the-old-witch-writes · 1 year

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Random Luffy Headcanon (18+/NSFW, modern/college au, Luffy x nerdy!afab!reader)

a/n: this was supposed to be for Six Sentence Sunday but it turned into a thing that is not six sentences lmao.

i swear to God, i actually am normal about this boy—but i know many of you aren't. and that's enough to enable me.

content warnings: sexual content, mild choking, mild sadist!Luffy, me inserting/continuing my sadist!Luffy agenda, luffy realizes he has a glasses fetish and he's totally normal about it 😏

feel free to buy me a coffee, if you can or want!

~~~

not much turns Luffy on. he isn't typically turned on by most of the usual things that get people going—so when it comes to you, his sexuality is super unpredictable. in fact, you're more likely to melt from desire than he is.

oh, he's always willing to do things with you—he loves you, and he finds it adorable whenever you ask him to get intimate, especially if you get all shy and blushy (it tickles something deep and dark inside him)—but he rarely goes feral in his arousal. he will not become the type of boyfriend who will go full caveman on you, let alone in front of all your friends and peers. he will not be the sort who randomly drags you into a closet or an empty classroom or one of the abandoned clubrooms in the student union to fuck you dumb against the wall, because something about you just left him hard as a rock.

he is not that type of boyfriend—until he is.

it all began when, on a random day, you walk onto campus wearing those.

you don't even need them most of the time, they're mostly for reading. they aren't particularly elegant like how most "sophisticated" glasses look, all narrow and catlike and making you look older than you are. they are huge lenses that make your already doe eyes look bigger, with this frame consisting of black with blue & pink flowers. unlike the stereotype, when most people see you with them, they don't think "student prodigy nerd". in fact, you look kind of dorky.

that's why it doesn't hit Luffy right away. he actually belly laughs in your face and calls you a dork, shifting quickly to giggles as he appeases you and your pout with sweet kisses. for weeks afterward, that's how your interactions go, for the most part. he calls you his "dork", you protest cutely, and he gives you kisses to reassure that yes, you dork, i still love you and your nerd glasses.

and for the most part, it's all normal.

...until it isn't.

it happens during a study session in his dorm.

Luffy has always been a shitty student. fortunately, you are just smart and articulate enough to explain concepts in a way that he understands, especially for one of the few classes you two share. you are right in the middle of explaining something—your voice trailing off as your interest in the subject makes you go off tangent, information from your own personal studies—and Luffy takes the time to watch you, his mouth spread into a warm smile as his eyes lid over while leaning his chin on the heel of his palm. at this point, he's completely lost on what you're talking about, but he finds your voice so soothing and sweet, no matter what. he takes in how your cheeks flush with excitement over the topic, how the words rush out of your perfect mouth in your passion, how your eyes just get this sparkle behind your—

suddenly, he goes completely still, his eyes going wide. although it might look like he's frozen, his blood is suddenly running so hot—rushing to spread a flush from the base of his neck to the tips of his ears and then dip right down to his suddenly very throbbing cock. his mouth begins to water, his throat starts to ache for something to relieve his thirst, and his breathing becomes harsh and deep.

have your eyes always looked so...pretty, when you got like that, all sparkly and wide with wonder and intelligence? were you always this painfully beautiful, overwhelmingly hot?

oh. oh, fuck, Luffy thinks with a hard swallow, his eyes watching as you adjust your glasses—which had begun slipping down your nose—and he lets out a little groan from his throat as the lens glints in the sunlight seeping in from the window, somehow further emphasizing the beauty in your eyes. sweat begins to bubble along the back of his neck, then slowly drips to dampen his red shirt as he finds it impossible to look away from you, your face, your eyes, those fucking glasses—

then you're turning to him and you pause, blinking wide eyes.

"Uh...Luffy? You okay?"

Luffy stares at you, the hand he was leaning on moving to rest on the table and clench into a tight fist.

"Ah, o-oh my g—Luffy!"

he lets out a little growl while sinking his teeth into the back of your knee, nearly at the meat of your thigh. then he licks the spot in a near apology, his mouth spreading into a smirk against your skin as he keeps slamming inside you. Luffy watches you with dark, lidded eyes as you keep falling apart for him, your little pussy so wet and messy already, he can already taste how close you are.

he sees you with your arms stretched above your head, your hands grasping at the edge of the table beneath you. most of your clothes are already on the floor, leaving you only in that button down shirt that he tore apart, leaving your tits out and bouncing deliciously from the force of his thrusts. your whole body is flushed and littered in marks from his teeth and tongue, especially along the slope of your neck. he takes in how you throw your head back, how your swollen lips part to release those broken moans of his name and profanities from the depths of your throat. and then, of course, there are your glasses. the lenses fogged, the frames tilted on your face, half on and half ready to fall to the floor.

Well, that won’t do, Luffy thinks with a frown. he pauses briefly in his thrusting.

dazed, you watch him and stammer out, “H-hey, what’re you...?”

“Just fixin’ ‘em,” he rasps, placing his free hand—the one not holding your leg over his shoulder—on your glasses to adjust them. when they're back on your ears, the alignment straight again, he grins. “There we go! Much better.”

you blink through fogged lenses, confused. but then you see how Luffy’s grin grows, like a wolf stalking you through the woods, and you moan at how he looms over you, your leg folded and still thrown over his shoulder.

“Gotta make sure my best girl can watch me stuff her full, yeah?” Luffy says, his voice a deep rumble and his dark eyes boring into yours. you swallow, feeling suddenly nervous under the direct eye contact. but when you try to turn away, he places a hand over your throat and squeezes lightly, his thumb pressing right under your chin. and you know you should feel afraid of him squeezing the breath out of you, but his touch just goes right to your throbbing clit, makes you clench around him with a dark want.

Luffy’s grin turns crooked, amused, as he starts moving again, your gaze unmoving from his.

“That’s it, baby. Keep those pretty eyes right on me and only me.”

#one piece #one piece x reader #one piece smut #monkey d. luffy #luffy x reader #smut #nsft #18+#mdni #luffy x reader smut

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tellthemeerkatsitsfine · 7 months

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Last week I wrote a post about the first episode of Taskmaster season 16. In it, I kept talking about something I’ve wondered for quite a while about Lucy Beaumont, which is how much of her schtick is a character. After posting that, I became a bit worried that might post might fall into a somewhat common, shitty trope where people are less likely to ascribe agency to a female comedian who seems strange than to a male one.

I first heard of this idea when I heard Rose Matafeo talk about it some time ago, because she has an emotional breakdown on stage at the end of her award-winning stand-up show Horndog, and she said that afterward, a lot of people asked if she was okay because they thought she had genuinely lost it, rather than written a show that ended with a breakdown. And not that that problem never happens to male comedians, but I think it happens less often, as people are more likely to trust that a male comedian is doing this on purpose, but might think a female comedian just doesn’t have control over her own act.

So I wondered, a bit, if I was falling into that by wondering whether or not Lucy Beaumont genuinely believes the ghost of a dog gets into bed with her at night and she doesn’t understand how road speed rules work differently from a television show. Especially because there is a male comedian making really daft comments for comedic effect right next to her, and I can use that as a contrast. When Sam Campbell tells a weird story about people who rescued divers, I know he’s aware that that’s a ludicrous idea to bring in, and is saying it because it’s funny. So why would I wonder whether Lucy Beaumont is saying her ridiculous things because “she’s just like that”.

To be clear, I don’t think she might be literally “just like that”. I mean, I know she knows she’s on TV and meant to be doing comedy. I know that when she says things, she says them because she thinks they’ll be funny. I guess my main question with her is whether we’re supposed to think she’s 100% in character, like the way someone like Nick Helm plays a character, or if she is just “playing herself” and “herself” happens to be someone who likes daft comedy. I think that’s what I was wondering. I know she has to be quite an intelligent person, because you can’t put a career together as successfully as Lucy Beaumont has if you’re not. You can’t be that funny if you don’t know what you’re doing. People being genuinely really daft is not as funny as smart people playing up daftness for comedy. I do know that.

And then I thought, maybe Sam Campbell isn’t the comparison I should be using. I have asked almost this exact same question before about Paul Chowdhry, and maybe that’s closer. I know that when Paul Chowdhry says something funny, he’s saying it because he’s aware that it will be funny. But also, it’s really hard for me to tell how much is a character and how much is him. I feel the same way about Lucy Beaumont, and I’m glad I’ve found an example of a male comedian I feel the same way about, suggesting that it’s not just something I ask about female comedians because I don’t want to give them credit for control over their own persona. I know she’s controlling it through intelligence and comedic skill. I just don’t know exactly how.

Last year, I listened to Paul Chowdhry’s episode of the Comedian’s Comedian podcast, in the hopes that it would answer some of those questions about him. I got very few answers, but it was a fascinating interview, and a bit amusing to hear Stuart Goldsmith so on the back foot, audibly very aware of the challenge in front of him, to try to get a sincere, out-of-character conversation out of the notoriously opaque Paul Chowdhry. Today, I listened to Lucy Beaumont’s (quite recent) episode of that podcast for the same reason, hoping for some insight into how her persona works.

I’ve just heard the following exchange, as they discuss how she writes her characters:

Lucy Beaumont: There’s no secret formula [for writing], it’s just really really hard, and you will get there. But with Paula [major character in Hullraisers, the TV sitcom that Lucy Beaumont’s written] – Paula definitely was a dead person coming through to me. I couldn’t shut her voice off, and her voice was so clear that it made me think it just was someone who was dead, and I was picking up on their energy. To Hull and Back [Lucy Beaumont’s Radio 4 sitcom] was written for me – a mother and a daughter came through, and I was keeping up with them. That was totally dead spirts who wrote that. If I’d have known their name I’d have credited them. Stuart Goldsmith: [laughs, sounding genuinely impressed with this figurative explanatory device] That’s incredible, that’s an incredible way of looking at it. To what extent are you using – just so I’m clear – to what extent are you using “dead people”, in inverted commas, as a metaphor for the creativity coming out of somewhere you don’t know where it’s from, and to what extent do you mean literally dead people? Lucy Beaumont: No, I literally, totally, one hundred percent believe that most writers, when you get characters that are fully formed – what they call “write themselves” – you have picked up on spirits. [pause that lasts half a second too long where despite the silence, you can hear him recalibrate his reaction to this now that he knows it’s meant literally] Stuart Goldsmith: That’s amazing, I’ve never heard anyone put it like that before. Lucy Beaumont: I’ve had a lot of conversations with a lot of writers and that, I’ve convinced them that that’s right.

The conversation goes on for a little while like this. To his credit, I think, Stuart Goldsmith strikes a good balance. He asks further questions to get her to expand on that point, and at some point, her insistence on how very literal she's being causes him to ask, "Lucy, are you pulling my leg?" To which the answer is no, and then you can hear him recalibrate again, giving up on his efforts to get her to see the potential in saying this is a good metaphorical device. To his credit I think he handles the ensuing conversation well - gently challenges the idea that writers can't just make shit up and it needs to come from spirits, but without being a dick about it and telling her that what she believes is wrong. And he does manage to dig into that far enough to find the scraps of her common ground with the people who, you know, don't believe in that shit, and pointing out the ways that her perspective could translate to really useful practical writing advice. He did pretty well, I thought.

But the point is that I no longer feel guilty for wondering whether Lucy Beaumont is entirely putting it on. I mean, she's putting some of it on, for comedic effect, intentionally intelligently as all comedians do. But also, when she says she believes a dog ghost climbs into bed with her at night, she's probably saying that not because she's in character, but because she believes a dog ghost climbs into bed with her at night.

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masterofpasta95 · 9 months

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The “Eggman is actually an adapted insult from Sonic!” thing that we are now proudly reminded of every 20 minutes makes me irrationally angry so I’m going to put an unnecessary amount of effort into explaining why it sucks.

Supreme dumbass (although, perhaps not pointless) nerd rage below.

This seemingly innocuous thing is somehow emblematic of everything I do not like regarding how Sonic is currently handled. It:

- is one of the most blatant “Flynn-isms” (providing an explanation to something which does not need one entirely for the sake of winning brownie points with the fandom and “solving inconsistencies”)

- treats localized material like it is “equally as legitimate” as things which the actual creators of sonic made

- instead of taking the path of least resistance, the explanation is still convoluted and contradictory with other information, therefore meaning its purpose of “solving things” isn’t even fucking accomplished

- makes Eggman, the character, less interesting.

Let’s make a ground rule clear: his name is supposed to be Eggman. We could talk about the merits of “Robotnik” as a name as much as we like, but the fact of the matter is, whether you like it or not, his original, intended name is Eggman. And it works, because this character LOOKS like a fuckin Egg Man.

“Eggman” is a great name because it makes him seem silly and non-threatening, not in spite of it. Eggman is a character defined by contrast; he’s smart, but he’s also kind of absent-minded. He sometimes looks friendly, but he can also look scary and ugly under the right conditions because of his toothy grin and vibrant, perfectly circular glasses. He’s quite jolly and funny, but also capable of extreme anger and desperation.

He seems silly and harmless, but is capable of single-handedly destroying entire ecosystems and designing scarily effective hedgehog killing machines.

He’s trying to do things he think will “improve” the earth, but he ruins it in the process.

If you make Eggman purely evil and imposing, you miss the point of Eggman. These are traits Eggman has in common with actual strangely intelligent manchildren. I would know.

However, I would argue the single most key thing about “Eggman” as a name is it’s second half: man. Eggman is generally representative of humanity and it’s insatiable desire for “progress,” at the cost of everything in its way. And, you know, the “Egg” half is self explanatory.

So, personally, I would say that there is not much reason to try and legitimize “Robotnik” in the first place, beyond it sounding cool and having a pun in it. Eggman is not only more fitting, it is more meaningful.

This is all relevant, because this “adapted insult” shit is spawned exclusively from a desire to try and make the way it was for Americans in real life- Robotnik “changed” to Eggman- the case in THE ACTUAL IN-LORE CANON OF SONIC THE FUCKING BLUE CARTOON HEDGEHOG, for some god forsaken reason. This whole Robotnik thing is also the primary headliner for how the American versions of non-American stories are now given more priority, because they are the more well-known versions, which more or less only serves to retroactively simplify the actual themes Classic Sonic was going for. Why would you do this as a storyteller, unless you were irrationally trying to make everything “equally valid?” It’s supremely shitty to do this fandom-satisfying stuff when viewed from a lens of actual artistic integrity. (And it also makes trying to convince people that Classic Sonic has more going on than it looks a god damn nightmare because they live in this ouroboros-esque feedback loop of misinformation)

And you can’t argue that his name was Robotnik in-universe up until SA1, anyways, and that all of this “wasn’t actually in the games, so it doesn’t contradict anything if it’s retconned!” These things come up all the time in these debates already, and you’re probably bored to tears of hearing about them, but I’m going to use them anyways.

Lol.

You could argue that “oh, he just adapted the insult before Sonic 2!” to which I have to ask, what’s the god damn point, then? Congratulations. He is “Robotnik” for one, maybe two games. You’re not getting what you want out of this, either.

Well, now we have an interesting question on our hands. Why WOULD he call himself “Eggman?”

This is where things become more headcanon-y, but it’s all extrapolated from actual character quirks of Eggman’s.

“Adapted insult” is honestly fiiiine as another “he’s always trying to be one step ahead of Sonic!” thing, but the logic is really tortured and it’s far more interesting to explore “Eggman” as a conscious, self-chosen name.

Consider for a moment how egotistical and proud of himself Eggman is. He genuinely thinks he is the single most awesome specimen there is, he’s so proud of his intelligence and vision that he oftentimes forgets the most basic of logic, in a “you forgot the first rule of X!” sort of way.

Eggman is also a businessman. And all businessmen are obsessed with one thing above all else: marketing.

And so, I choose to interpret “Eggman” as him deliberately selling his image as a perfectly spherical weirdo with a big mustache. It could even be something like a “superhero name,” he’s so proud of it that he wants everyone to know it and respect it. He is the Eggman, that’s what he is, and don’t ask again.

If he came up with a catchy name for himself and started plastering it everywhere, every single person would eventually know who “The Eggman” is. And it’s not like Eggman is insecure about being fat, or whatever; again, he thinks he’s perfect. “Eggman” is a name he’s both proud of and is great for marketing.

Every logo of his also fits cleanly into this “plastering The Eggman everywhere” idea; they’re all either of the word “Egg” itself, or something to do with his appearance, most commonly just straight up his face.

Oh, yeah, and as alluded to earlier, his god damn theme song is about how proud he is about being “The Eggman.”

In summary, “His name was Robotnik, and then Sonic insulted him by calling him Eggman, so he just decided to roll with it” is a dumb explanation, made entirely to both-sides something that is actively worse for being both-sides’ed, and it is significantly better characterization-wise if Eggman just came up with the name himself.

Thus concludes this week’s edition of Pasta’s Dumb Nerd Soapbox, I hope I explained myself well.

#eggman #sonic the hedgehog

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ghostherlig · 14 days

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I actually dream of the day u write something bi-han/shang tsung omg...

ohhhh those two... they are so toxic in my mind fr- not that that's going to stop me from writing them, i do enjoy playing around with those relationship dynamics- esp since in my mind there's such a power imbalance between the two of them

the long-short of it is, bi han and shang tsung feed each others egos and bi han is very dependent on shang and his view of him to function well in their alliance- and shang uses that to his advantage at every turn bc all it takes to get bi han to change his mind is to plant a seed of doubt- aruashdfkjs

alternate version of them being a bit sweeter but possibly even hilariously like mk11 aftermath sindel and shao khan- literally "what bones of his shall i break for you, my love?" "mm. surprise me. <333" like that kind of so in love but toxic and cruel to literally everyone around them LMAO-

i am going to yap abt them for a moment bc i do have Some Personal Headcanons about the lin kuei and shirai ryu and shang tsung and how that all plays out post-mk1--

in my mind, kuai and tomas almost immediately separate from the lin kuei and form the shirai ryu in secret, cutting all communication with bi han-

and in my mind, bi han isnt happy about that, he does miss his brothers, even if he never admitted it to himself before that moment- it's also a personal hc of mine that bi han wouldnt have been such a shitty brother if it werent for the relationship he had with his parents- in my mind bi han was forced to spend a lot more of his time with his father and got to see things that kuai and tomas had no idea about-

think azula and zuko- bi han is his father's son, and his father used that to mold bi han into his version of the perfect warrior, and bi han shaped his expectations of himself and his brothers around that image as well

so, when kuai and tomas break off of him and "betray him" in his eyes, he's upset about it.

but he also gets shang out of it, and i feel like there's a golden opportunity there for some ✨One-Sided Codependency✨

shang tsung helps feed bi han's ego and personal security, which bi han needs now that he doesnt have anyone else to do it for him, and shang uses that to direct bi han where he wants him to focus. shang also uses the power he has over their alliance to get bi han to prioritize protecting him versus prioritizing the strength of his clan.

if they arent going to be toxic to each other, i feel like bi han would fall HARD for shang's intelligence and cunning. shang is so smart and he uses it for his own benefit, but bi han sees the practicality of it too and it just makes him crazy-

shang tsung would fall in love with how brutal and efficient bi han is- like bi han is very one-track-minded and shang can appreciate the brutality he approaches problems with.

and the two of them together? shang's mastermind with bi han's determination and brutality? they're a pair to be reckoned with, and it's terrifying- shang builds the groundworks for something evil and bi han gives him the men and the efficiency to get it done nearly overnight-

they both adore each other for their strengths but also see how they compliment each other and it takes a while for either of them to make a move but once they do their affections and relationship becomes so casual that it almost seems like it's always been that way...

god, thinking about them too hard fr... idk how quickly i'll be able to write smth for them but i will be thinking abt them for a while now, LMAO- i am sick so it might be longer than i'm hoping for, but i do have a few ideas in mind now.. arugrughaskdjf mk men ruin me 😔

#ghost answers #mk1 bi han #mk1 shang tsung #do they have a ship name??#if they do i have no idea what it is-#also horrid awful thoughts of genderfluid shang tsung and trans bi han...#someone turn me into an oyster fr /j #bishang #coldsoul

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nutklcker · 2 months

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Thoughts about the monsters/entities and how they work, under the cut, CW for talks of death, murder, blood, etc /pos

Coilheads:

- I think the way they kill has to do with the victim's blood. Like, a coil touches a victim and then their head blows off and they get a coil, and also their forearms disappear

- I think they like blood bend or something, they increase the pressure of your blood until it blows you up at your weak points, which, idk how pressure and anatomy work, but that being your neck and elbows would make sense to me

- From there coils manually place/insert the coil into their victim's neck, and I think through this way the victim will eventually turn into a coilhead

- Insides hollowing out, skin turning to metal, growing in size. I have no intelligent reasoning for this I just think that's how they make more coils tee hee

Bracken:

- I don't think the brackens are supposed to be indoors, and I think if they were outside they would "heal" for lack of a better word

- I like plants but I don't know much about non succulents, but I know some plants get darker when they don't get enough sunlight, which I think is what's up with brackens (additionally succulents turn white which could explain their eyes, I mean humans eyes are mostly water like how succulents are basically plants that are mostly water (simplification))

- As such I think that brackens that are outdoors will eventually change colors, their skin ranging from pastel pink and sand beige to chicken nugget tan and peach to rich rose red and chestnut brown

- I think their leaves could also change, like some could resemble oaks, and some could resemble echeverias, and pine needles (HEDGEHOGCORE <3) and so on and so forth

- Also, I think they would start growing flowers and/or fruits, and thorns/horns like how Giants have since the two are related

- I think most brackens are fungal in nature, considering they decompose incredibly quickly and sort of turn into spores it seems when they die. I think too if these spores land on something organic that organic thing could potentially turn into a Bracken (this is actually the lore for an OC I have!!! I should make a post abt them sometime)

Nutcrackers:

- I think the Nutcracker's "parasite" is actually its real body, and that when places in the large nutcracker body the tendrils and eye act as, basically, the body's nervous system. The tendrils spread throughout the limbs and slowly seep/spread through the metal and wood, so they can actually feel through the outside of their body

- As such I think they would bleed a little if they got cut, but it would take a long time for the blood to get overwhelming AND to close the wound

- it's possible to take the "parasite" out of the body but they have to do it themselves or risk snapping tendrils and bleeding to death, like snails (I think?) but once they disconnect they can get out

- I think once they're out they're deaf, mute, can't eat, still have their shitty vision, etc (imagine,,, imagine hold him gently... hold him like hamburger, perhaps)

- Also that thingy is totally related to the thingy the Jester is those is fambly

Spore Lizards:

- They are/were domesticated, ouppy dougy

- They're actually super smart like dogs or dolphins

- Capybara of the LC world, meaning they can befriend anything despite being super anxious

- Work like cats, they like staying with other animals without interacting, and the more you do it the more it trusts you you know??? Aminal <3

Giants:

- Not much to say aside from I think they could understand Brackens. Maybe they couldn't talk back but they could probably understand them mostly off of body language because Brackens are SO cats you know?

Anyways, I'm super soupy now and should go to bed, enjoy eating these thoughts if you read this far <3

#host #👁️#being cocon meant it took forever to write this if there's typos no there isn't /lhj #do we use tone tags too often?#actually you know what better be safe than sorry tbfh

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cursed-40k-thoughts · 2 months

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How are you feeling about The Great Tumblr AI Debacle? (AKA scraping the website for content with an automatic opt-in and a fairly well-hidden opt-out button, because of fucking course they did.)

Personally, I see an upside: Imagine the sheer amount of twinky femboy admech content it's being trained on. Can the AI gain sapience and decide it wants to be a pretty boy? Can we get our own cute twinkarii IRL? One can only hope.

I think that data scraping shitty generally, and I think that data scraping for the purpose of giving it to generative AI companies so they can attempt to further torpedo the creative industry is even shittier. I wish everyone involved in that garbage a very fall into a pool filled with fire ants.

Also, the opt out thing is probably performative, and they’ve likely already been sharing your data for ages. So yeah, op out, because fuck ‘em, but also understand that it’s a fully limp gesture on their part.

The AI can’t gain sapience either, I’m afraid. AI is fairly common in tech (Google search suggestions and YouTube algorithms are both a form of AI) and generative AI is no closer to being “smart” or sentient than any of the others. There is no creative or intelligent process going on; it’s just spitting mishmashes of other peoples’ words/art at you. It is incapable of contextualising anything for itself, or creating something of its own volition.

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enchi-elm · 2 months

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I've been writing some smut for two of my OCs in the Turn fanfic You've Caught Me Between Wind and Water, Lt. Jameson Mullcock and Lt. Frederico Ridgewell. It's going really well, so well in fact that I might end up submitting it to an erotica magazine in the future--which would prevent me from posting it on AO3.

To that end, to cover my own disappointment, here's some bits of lore for these two, gratis:

Background

Frederico

Full name is Frederico “Dico” Miguel Carvalho dos Reis Ridgewell

He is a Portuguese-American (mother is Portuguese) and stands in for the many Portuguese-American contributions to the Continental Army (go look up Pedro "Peter" Francisco)

Father split when Frederico was young, he grew up with his mother in New York in a Portuguese neighbourhood

Speaks fluent Portuguese

James

Jameson Mullcock is just Jameson Mullcock, but he goes by James

He is Irish-American and stands in for the many Irish-American contributions to the Continental Army (I explicitly wanted to include an Irish-American character because there were shitty stereotypes in the army against the Irish from other nationalities; like, we have primary sources for this)

James does not disclose he is half-Irish when he enlists and just lists his birthplace as Philadelphia

His mother is Abaigeal Noiréis (Abigail Norris), born in Galway, Ireland (thank you @mercurygray for naming her and helping me with her backstory!)

She is Catholic and married a Protestant British soldier she met during the occupation of Ireland, then followed him to England and then Pennsylvania and had to keep her faith secret

James is raised Protestant and only knows a little of the Catholic faith, which he keeps secret (because there was a considerable anti-Catholic sentiment in parts of the colonies)

Knows a little bit of Irish and wishes he knew more but doesn't think he'd be welcome (or feel comfortable) among the Irish soldiers and officers

Personality and looks

Frederico

olive skin, dark eyes, tousled dark hair

enough weight on him to look conspicuously healthy at Valley Forge in 1777

exactly as athletic as he looks but not quite as intelligent

drop dead gorgeous and doesn't care

cinnamon roll, too pure for this world, is the only one unaware that people believe this of him

a dark horse so dark you can't even see him coming

James

pale enough to look anemic, eyes and hair too light for people's comfort

tall, gangly; gaunt, even by Valley Forge standards

more athletic than he looks and more intelligent too

sarcastic slacker who's too smart to let people know how much more responsibility he's capable of taking on

has maybe two vices (tea and tobacco) that he'll hold onto, everything else he's already resigned himself to losing

would rather light his arm on fire than go after something he wants in a direct, open, and honest manner (and be Seen? Are you mad?)

Occupation

and the whole reason I put this post together, which is to remind future Apfel that they are 2nd LIEUTENANTS in LAMB'S CONTINENTAL ARTILLERY which was reorganized in 1777 from LAMB'S INDEPENDENT COMPANY NEW YORK ARTILLERY which drew from artillery companies in NEW YORK, CONNECTICUT AND PENNSYLVANIA. OKAY??

AND ARTHUR GARRICK IS A 1ST LIEUTENANT AND CAPTAIN ARMISTEAD FOLK IS THEIR CAPTAIN. AND PERKINS IS THEIR ENSIGN. IT'S ALL ONE GROUP. REMEMBER THIS!

CALEB WAS PART OF THIS GROUP. THEY WERE ALSO IN PEEKSKILL AND AT THE WHITEMARSH ENCAMPMENT.

YOU ALREADY WROTE LAMB INTO THE STORY IN CHAPTER 8.

YOU ALREADY FIGURED THIS OUT.

YOU DON'T NEED TO RESEARCH IT AGAIN.

...

@georgios-kyriacos, I believe you expressed interest in these two :)

#Apfelessig #You've Caught Me Between Wind and Water #turn amc #my fanfic #the writing echo chamber #swear to god if I have to find another surprising connection years down the line about this freaking army #thank god that regiment drew from those exact three colonies I didn't want to have to rethink their backgrounds #long post #also Garrick's and Mullcock's name come from a Tumblr User's suggestions and i can't find the username??? I'm so sorry!!#also in looking for that information I uncovered notes from 2020 that told me that Perkins does actually have a first name #that I have never mentioned #and it is Sidney #this discovery makes me feel slightly more charitable toward him than I have ever been in the story #also Ridgewell's name was originally meant to be John

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