The Art of Playing Baseball
I watched "The Unnatural" and was super normal about it.
Read on AO3
The night is cool but he’s warm behind her. So warm. Every place they touch is like the pleasant sear of the sun on a day when you know you’re getting burnt but you’re having too much fun to care.
She’s giggling, high and girlish and with that rhythmless cadence she knows she has. Every time she laughs she feels his echo reverberate through her back from his chest. His laugh is low and his breath brushes her cheek. She laughs just to feel it echoed again.
“Hips before hands.” He reminds her once more, his hand drifting to her hip again in a way that makes her feel like she may crumble into dust right there in his arms. His lips brush her cheek this time and she wishes he would just drop the pretense and kiss her there. She’s surprised by how bold her thoughts are, but - then again - no she isn’t; her thoughts are always this bold, they just usually aren’t this loud.
The bat in their hands cracks again, the impact of the ball jolting up her arms and rattling her joints. For a second, she can feel the bones in her palms and knuckles acutely. It hurts, but she smiles; it’s the pain of playing baseball. It’s a pain she is more than willing to live with, in this moment.
“I’m out of balls!” The kid at the pitching machine shouts. “Give me a minute!” He runs off to the outfield to gather the few that they haven’t fouled out of the park.
They stand still for a moment, twin breaths moving through them both between her back and his chest. Slowly, she releases the bat and turns in his arms.
The breath that has been warming her cheek is now mingling with her own, leaving her cheek cold. As if he can sense this, his hand comes up to cup her face.
She’s kissing him before she thinks. She doesn’t want to think. This is not a night for thinking; he had said as much earlier. “We’re just gonna make contact. We’re not gonna think. We’re just gonna let it fly, Scully.”
Without a doubt, she’s flying now.
His lips are as warm as the rest of him and soft, absurdly soft. They move softly too, letting her set the tone of whatever will happen next. She increases the pressure and he matches it.
He tastes like sunflower seeds. She always figured he would. She thought about it, sometimes, as he would give her a handful to crack between her teeth. She hadn’t been fond of the flavor until his hands were the ones holding the bag out to her in offering. Now, she can’t imagine anything tasting better.
Her hands are tangled in the front of the jersey she’s almost embarrassed to admit looks really, really good on him. She’s never been into jocks, but this isn’t a jock - this is Mulder and the jersey is just another aspect of him. It’s an element of who he is that she’s slowly learning, slowly coming to appreciate.
The hand that isn’t on her cheek is on her hip again and suddenly she needs air.
She pulls back enough to leave his lips behind, but their foreheads, their hands, their chests are still touching. They’re still sharing air.
Awareness washes over her, tingling in her cheeks. She swallows down the panic that threatens to ruin the warmth and softness of the night. Slowly, she pulls back and looks up at him.
“I think, maybe, I could get behind baseball.”
He chuckles, gently swiping his thumb over her cheekbone. “It’s not always like this.”
“I know.” She swallowed again. “But maybe it’s worth it for the moments that are.”
His eyes are full of understanding. “I’ve always thought that.”
“Have you?”
“Have you ?” His eyebrow goes up: an invitation to either let it fly or let the ball pass.
She leans forward again. This is not a night for thinking.
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Not that filthy, who do you think is mtl into anal? Giving and receiving? And do you think they would be into anytime or only in certain scenarios, like DP or moresomes?
Fuck! Yes I love this. So... I'm obsessed with anal play on this blog and want to say each and everyone of skz is into it. But... I'm going to think about this properly and give you a run down of my thoughts.
Minho Loves to give it to you. Whether it's just him and you, or there are multiple people involved. Whenever you're up for it. He knows how you fuck your ass so good. He’ll build you up so slowly and have you on the edge for so long that you beg for release. He knows you so well - your body, the sounds you make. He knows when you’ve reached the precipice. He pulls out halfway and pauses when you’re almost there, when you’re in that moment when time stands still, and then he’ll time his next thrust to push you over the edge of that cliff. But you don’t fall, you soar high through the clouds as though your body is everywhere all at once, and then he’ll hold you as you come back down.
Contrary to what most ppl believe, he also enjoys receiving. Maybe not as much as giving, but when he's whipped for you, he just wants you to take over his entire being. He craves for you to fill him. Whether that's with and actual dick or a strap. He wants to be a pretty little mess for you and show you how weak you make him.
Jisung also loves to both give and receive. I know he's mostly written as a needy sub bottom. BUT he's a switch (I actually think that has become the consensus these days). He loves being fucked so hard and overstimulated, but there's this need in him to top from time to time. If he's with a female partner, he sometimes can't decide if he wants to fuck your pussy or ass. He wishes he had two cocks (I wish he had two cocks... and there is a fic out there where he's and alien with two purple cocks). He's up for DP with you (maybe minho can join?) One of his favorite scenarios is him inside you and someone inside him. Greedy shit wants all the stimulation.
Felix. He's obsessed with anal play. He loves to have anal with you where you're the receiver, but he's more into anal plugs and dildos. He likes to spread your cheeks and see you're wearing a cute little plug. He likes to wear them too, and It won't be long until he's asking you to wear a strap. He's a curious freak in the sheets tbh. He loves the plugs with dangly charms (I'm sure I've mentioned that before).
Chan. Giver of the best anal of your life. He's big and he stretches you so good. He's noisy when he fucks you like this. You're just too tight. He whimpers, shakes, moans... he's extremely vocal. He has a fantasy of double penetration and is so excited when you mention you want to try. He calls upon a trusted friend and together they fill your holes. He secretly wants to dp you same hole. I think he'd let someone fuck him too, but it would have to be someone he trusts. He feels very vulnerable about it.
Binnie. I feel like he's not as into anal as the other guys, but he still enjoys it. He can't say no to you when you beg him like you do. He always ends up enjoying it when he does. It's something about how much your anus has to stretch to accommodate his thickness that has him whimpering. It's so hard to hold back from fucking into you hard, and once he fully seated inside you, it takes all his self control to not blow immediately. I honestly think you could easily persuade him to let you play with him too. I bet he'd secretly love you to finger him (why does that thought do things to me?)
Jeongin. He acts like he's not into it. He pretends he's not interested. But he's conflicted. It started when you put ideas in his head about how good it'd feel. The more you talked about it, the more normalized it seemed. Then he started to fantasize about it. Jerk off to images of it. He watched a bit of porn. And when he finally agreed to it... well... he's kind of obsessed.
Seungmin. All I can think is "anal as punishment". Like he'd get so angry (roleplaying of course), and he'd tell you what a filthy, pathetic little slut you are. "You don't deserve to have your needy pussy filled. Nope, you're gonna take it in your ass, and you're gonna feel me for days." He's rough, and it stings, but he needs to punish you. It always feels too good for you, and you come so fast even though you weren't given permission to come at all. Deep down he loves that your body just can't stop itself. He also likes that it gives him an excuse for him to punish you more. He isn't one for receiving. But I don't know, maybe you could convince him? He's just a little nervous, and he doesn't want to relinquish control.
Hyunjin. I'm obsessed with imaging Hyunjin and sexual activities to involve art somehow. Especially sculptures. He has this sculpture that resembles a cock that he uses on himself (in front of a mirror because he loves to watch how erotic it is). He uses it on you too, before he sinks his cock into you. With Hyunjin you need to be open to experimentation. He wants to try anal in all the positions you can think of. He needs to see or feel it from all angles. The sex swing he owns comes in handy too. He is up for all combinations. Giving, receiving, dp receiving (yes I said that) dp-ing you - two holes, one hole... he loves it all. Also, the more the merrier for him. I think he'd be involved in group sex. He finds it erotic and expressive.
permanent tag list : open (if you are on my series taglists but want to be tagged in all my posts, please let me know and I can add you to the permanent tag list)
@channieandhisgoonsquad @noellllslut @itsseohannbin @weareapackofstrays @3rachasdomesticbanana @palindrome969 @xxkissesforchanniexx @chuuchuu1224 @fun-fanfics @wolfennracha @rhonnie23 @jisunglyricist @strayywayy @armystay89 @igetcarriedawaywithyou @mylittleponeypinkrosieposie @kyunchoni
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NOT MY FATHER ; enemies to lovers. (reader is shane’s daughter) — part one .
(intended lowercase)
notes: au where the apocalypse happened when he was older plus all the events, so shane's murder attempt happened when he 17 (for plot reasons)
warnings: carl is sort of a dick at first, mentions of attempted murder, bittersweet ending (part two will be very happy I promise)
description: carl and you had been inseparable before the apocalypse but that quickly changed the night your father lost it.
everyone longed for the life they were forced to leave behind when the apocalypse started, some loathed it, it depended on the situation. you, however, were in the vast majority of people who missed it, who wanted back what they once had, who they once had.
it had been several years since the outbreak started and you had come to terms with the fact that this was just how things were now. your life before the apocalypse was simple, you lived with your father, shane, he was an amazing dad despite the hours he worked. when your father was at work you would either be at school or staying at lori's, lori had agreed to watch over you along with her son, carl. carl was your best friend, you did everything together; read comics, play video games, watch tv — whatever kept the two of you entertained.
at least, that's how it had been.
ever since shane had tried to kill rick in a sick attempt to regain lori's heart carl had shown a strong distaste for you. it made you angry. you wondered how the boy you'd grown up with could hate you over your father's actions, you weren't the one who executed them so why?
when it had happened you assumed carl's coldness would eventually wear off, but it never did, it had been years and he still expressed the same disdain for you. you could tell he wished you were someone else, wished you weren't the spawn of such evil, but it just wasn't possible.
rick never treated you any different, he knew it wasn't your fault, so why didn't carl?
you learned to stop questioning him so much or trying to make amends, it didn't make any difference so you quit wasting your time. that seemed to anger him more, you didn't understand why considering it was his request to you.
you thought being in alexandria would help lessen the tension between you two or at least make it more avoidable, but it was to no avail, he seemed to seek you out just to spare you a scoff or scowl. you hated it, if he wanted to scorn your being then so be it, but couldn't he refrain from making it so obvious?
eventually, rick had torn him a new one after he had crossed a line and he began to leave you alone.
that was until it was deemed smart to send the two of you on a run together. alone.
it had started off fine, silent but fine. normally, silence in a situation like yours would be unbearable, but the possibility of what could be said if either of you spoke was much more unpleasant, and you were certain you were right when he did speak.
you were crouched down, shoveling supplies into a duffle bag while he was standing guard in case any walkers tried to sneak up on you two when he decided to speak, “do you even care about what he did?”
you felt yourself flinch in shock, not expecting him to speak, your lips pressing into a thin line when you processed his question.
“of course I do.”
“then why don't you act like it?”
you couldn't resist the scoff that urged to escape your lips at the accusation, your fingers tightening around the bag they held. “how am I supposed to act? I have apologized a hundred times, cried, tried to make amends— it's never gonna be enough, is it?”
“he tried to kill my father—”
“yeah, carl, he did. shane did. shane tried to kill your father, not me, when are you gonna get that?” you spat, zipping the duffel bag and throwing it over your shoulder. you could hear his hesitation to speak again and used it to your advantage, allowing yourself to quickly exit the store and make it back to the car before he did.
sometimes you couldn't believe the audacity the boy had, did you care? of course you cared, was he out of his mind?
the shuffling of feet dragged you out of your thoughts, you could see carl making his way in the direction of the car and decided it would be a good time to throw the supplies in the back — there wasn't much in the store to loot but it was better than some of your other runs. you closed the door of the car and made your way around to the passenger side, climbing in.
the ride back was just as silent as the ride there, minus the tapping of carl's fingers on the wheel. you could tell he was thinking about something, you were sure that it was related to the conversation you two had just moments ago. you hoped that maybe he finally realized you weren't to blame for the actions of your father, but then again, the chance of that was very slim; you had been trying to convince him for years, one petty argument wasn't gonna change anything.
you didn't waste any time returning to your house the second you arrived back, too overwhelmed with fury to care about much else. you trudged up your stairs and threw yourself on your bed, burying your face in the mattress, allowing yourself to find refuge in the soft material. tears found their way from your eyes into the cloth, absorbing it along with all your sorrows — you weren't one for self pity but you desperately wanted answers, wanted forgiveness for crimes you hadn't committed, and most importantly wanted your best friend back. was there really nothing that could be done to mend what your father had broken? you didn't want to blame him but you did, you resented him for what he did and what he caused. everyday for the past 3 years you sat and pondered in a puddle of ‘what if’s — what if your dad hadn't lost it? what if he was successful? what if carl never blamed you? still, nothing changed the present, you were still left without carl by your side.
you hear a sigh in your doorway, jolting up to see maggie standing there with crossed arms,
“I told them it wasn't a good idea to send you guys together.”
you couldn't help but laugh as she approached you, taking a seat next to you.
“you're probably the only smart one out of them.”
“what happened?”
maggie and you were never really close, because, frankly, you weren't close with anyone anymore, but she seemed to care and notice things and you appreciated that; you trusted her. “he thinks it's my fault, he doesn't say it but I can tell. he thinks I don't care— it's like he's convinced I'm heartless.”
“with the way you sit in here crying about it, I doubt you're heartless, he just needs someone to be angry at.”
you nod, a soft sight leaving your lips, “yeah, I just wish it wasn't me.”
a slight frown was all she gave in response, resting her hand on your shoulder for a moment in a brief attempt of comfort before getting up to exit your room. you listened to her footsteps become distant as she descended down the stairs, throwing yourself back against the mattress once she was no longer within earshot.
you guessed she was right, maybe he did just need someone to be mad at and you just happened to be the perfect candidate, how unlucky.
you had no desire to leave your room after the events of today and opted for a nap to cure your exhaustion and hopefully your desolation.
you didn't bother changing into night clothes and instead focused on untying your combat boots, you tossed them to the side and crawled under the comforter, relishing in the comforting feeling. it didn't take long for you to become a victim to sleep, quickly drifting off and being met with a blank mind.
sleep was the ultimate painkiller, that was something you stood by, but with the apocalypse it was just about as hard to come by as ibuprofen. when you did get the privilege of sleeping you took it as a delicacy, you used it to let your mind stray away from carl and instead become blank or filled with dreams. nightmares were rare for you, but the select few times you did have them were nothing major so you never had to worry about them like others did, which you suppose made you lucky.
you weren't sure what time it was when you were awakened by the sound of knocking on your window.
your hand immediately found its way to the knife you had on your nightstand, you kept a tight grip on it as you approached your window as quietly as you could. you pulled the curtains aside to get a view of who caused the noise, you felt your body go rigid at the sight, the knife in your hand falling to the floor and clattering on the hardwood.
carl grimes. carl grimes sat crouched in front of your window.
once you came down from your shock enough to move, you opened the window, moving aside so he could climb in. he landed on your floor with a soft thud, immediately standing to his full height and stretching, his gaze lingering on you as he did so.
“why are you here?” the words came out soft and unthreatening unlike you had intended, your voice wavering slightly. he moved away from you take a seat on your bed, waiting for you to take the spot next to him,
“I wanna talk.”
you got the hint and sat down next to him, staring at your lap, avoiding making eye contact with him. “okay.”
“you were right— today when we were out, you were right. you didn't do anything, shane did. I was just angry, I wanted to be mad at shane, to take it out on him, but he was gone so I took it out on you, his daughter. when it happened it all felt the same and I never let it go, I never even allowed myself to think about it. I saw you and saw shane and that's all it took I guess.”
“I'm not my father, carl.” your broken voice confirmed, the tears from earlier resurfacing and streaming down your cheeks. you've waited years for this conversation and when you finally get the opportunity to have it every last emotion managed to find its way to the surface.
“I know, I see that now. I'm sorry.”
“why wouldn't you just talk to me? I could've told you that a while ago, I shouldn't have had to wait 3 years for you to finally come to your senses and realize that my father is the one who went crazy, not me. I shouldn't have had to mourn a friendship that could've been so much more if you would've just noticed that.” your tear filled eyes rose to look at him, your stare asking him every question you've asked yourself over the years, showing him all the confusion, the anger, the sadness.
“I couldn't. I just couldn't.”
“that's not enough, carl! I want answers, I deserve answers!”
“because I was in love with you! I was in love with you and I couldn't be in love with you then!”
you froze, your eyes widening in shock, “…what?”
“I was in love with you and I knew you were in love with me too, I couldn't handle it. I was mad at you for something you didn't even do and I couldn't bear being around you knowing all I could see was him and what he did while I still loved you.”
you sobbed. you couldn't do much more than that. he was right, you had been in love with him and you still were, he knew why you were so upset — he knew that your longing was for more than a lost friendship. what had happened wasn't fair, not just to you, but to him too; you finally understood why he acted the way he did and now you couldn't bring yourself to be angry with him, all you could feel was despair. you felt him wrap his arm around you, pulling you closer to him and you couldn't help but lean into him while continuing to cry.
“I'm sorry. I should've told you sooner.”
— a/n : part two will be out soon, I promise it will have a happy ending. thank you for reading! you can send me requests if you want.
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