#taakos good out here

[yardsards]

taako adventurezone is the embodiment of both the "don't ever put me in a situation" and "if it sucks, hit da bricks" memes

#eliot posts #taz #the adventure zone #taz balance #taako taaco #he is my patron saint #or whatever other description for this is funnier #i too am Good Out Here

[thatgirlonstage]

Thinks about arms outstretched and has to lie facedown on the ground for nine hours again

#taz #taz: balance #it’s NARRATIVELY PERFECT #like yes they hella ignored the mechanics to make it happen but on the pure improvisational level #it’s absolutely fucking NUTS to me what they pulled off in that moment #because in that moment ALL THREE OF THEM set aside their personal fears and self-doubts for the sake of their friends #Magnus who always wanted to go out in a blaze of glory #who has just lost even his revenge quest #fights so DESPERATELY HARD to STAY ALIVE and relies on his friends to rescue him #Taako ‘good out here’ Taaco who throws HIS WHOLE SOUL OUT OF HIS BODY #despite being on the verge of death already he leaves himself utterly defenseless to throw himself into danger for magnus’s sake #merle who has ALWAYS doubted his place in the group and is actively losing his powers #doesn’t hesitate and doesn’t question his own competence #instead he plants himself and becomes the root that anchors them and brings them home #and because right after this they reunite with Barry and start getting the reveals about the voidfish #this is functionally the climax and culmination of their arc as a trio #they found each other and learned to trust each other again and they became friends who would do anything for each other #even without their memories!!!! they did that!!!!!!!! #what happens after then gets to build onto and around that relationship #so that the finale gives us the trio whose bond has been deepened and multiplied by stolen century #but they’re still THEM. still the trio we have grown to know and love throughout the whole podcast #bc they have something unshakeable with or without their memories #ARMS OUTSTRETCHED IS A NARRATIVELY PERFECT MOMENT AND I AM NEVER FUCKING OVER IT

[warlordfelwinter]

just browsing my own pictures of rain and started laughing bc i just noticed gale and lae'zel in the meeting with boo like

fully not even in the room those two are not getting anywhere NEAR this miniature giant space hamster

#jaheira was standing right next to me #but gale and lae'zel are like 'taako's good out here' #fel's bg3 #oc: rain

[plantb0t]

I did not realize "taako's good out here" wasn't a thing until crystal kingdom. huh. Justin just announced that this is a new thing

I guess bc it was kind of a thing in gerblins I just figured that's where it was from. but Justin kinda dropped it again until crystal kingdom apparently

#.txt #taz b lb #taako in gerblins was like. taako's good out here but then justin decided he was stupid and that kinda overrode it

[andthen-light]

tht post just got me thinkin abt arms outstretched but like i have such a gripe w the taz fandom referring to generally just like. any scene where the pcs reach for eachother as arms outstretched 2 or 3 or whatever like its rlly not

#i get it but not everything has to refer back to balance. loikkkk speaking as a hashtag balance girlie #(autistic) #also arms outstretched is more than the pcs reaching for eachother and saving eachother its. idk #they like referenced it in the first gn and it just feels like hollow bcoz at tht point thb arent like Close. they dont have tht kind of #bond yet where taako ‘taakos good out here’ adventurezone risks everything to save magnus and merle saves both of them LIKE #doing this arms outstretched animatic just makes me go wild over this scene but idk its a good scene dont water my girl down #bark bark bark WHATEVER. gay little dnd PODCAST. #NONE OF THIS MATTERS IM JUST AUTISTIC. JESUSSSS

[terezis]

ok here's the hot goss from the nycc taz gn panel

i don't actually know whether or not it was recorded/ if they're going to put it online so here is my summary. also if i miss anything and u were there pls feel free to chime in. spoilers obviously!!!

got eight new preview pages (four two-page spreads), not the pages on the macmillan website!!!

ok i will tell u about those pages but the main thing discussed at the panel was how they went about adapting this arc into gn form. the actual time spent in wonderland has been trimmed a lot bc they had to think about what was actually important to the narrative as they are building to story and song.

basically in planning out the suffering game they also really had to decide what the rest of the series would look like, bc whatever they include now is seeding the stuff that's going to happen later.

cam is not in this book. it was implied there's less wheel spins. rowan/ash/sterling get much less screen time

almost half of this book is lunar interlude stuff (pre and post suffering game, INCLUDING REUNION TOUR!!! no word on where it ends but they made it clear that a LOT of thought went into what to include and where to end it, and what that would mean for the next book)

ok so about those preview pages

first one was post-taakitz date with kravitz sensing a lich and the umbra staff shooting at him <3 <3 <3

i thought they were going to show us the preview pages that were on macmillan so when i saw kravitz i was so shook

second spread was magnus visiting the voidfish, which now happens right before they leave for wonderland; the whole beginning of tsg from magnus trying to talk to pringles to him kidnapping those guards to the chimera fight was cut LOL bc it never really got… addressed again in the podcast

angus comes to get him for the mission but magnus has been going Through It (outright stated, they were like. he found out he's a red robe. he would probably not be handling it well. he has eyebags now. LOL) and snaps at angus when angus presses him on what's wrong.

more angus content, he will be investigating what's going on at the bureau more (his scene w magnus ties into this)

same for lucretia! more content/ stuff for her to do

third spread was merle w his kids getting saved by the red robe, is at a carnival instead of a random street this time LOL

last one was the boys arriving just outside of wonderland

wonderland looks fuckign cool

what else… oh confirmed like eighty panels of bare ass naked magnus after he gets his body back. so i think we really are getting the full reunion tour this book???

ALSO NAKED BARRY COVERED IN SLIME. WHEN HE GETS OUT OF THE POD. CONFIRMED. CANON. LOL

omg ALSO!!! ben (editor) said he campaigned REALLY HARD to have the umbra staff break during the suffering game, freeing lup early, bc he really wanted more time with her, but griffin campaigned really hard NOT to do this, and in doing so his arguments solved a lot of other problems they had been having at the time LOL

travis is the fans' champion when the others get too edit-happy. he's the one who has a good idea of what moments are important to the readers so he's like hey… too far. don't cut that. and then they don't

justin leaves great notes and when they couldn't figure stuff out ben would often say "no it's fine justin will solve this." and he ALWAYS DID

this was news to justin

??? i think that's all the main points honestly i'm v picky about adaptations but overall i feel like these are good changes that make sense when translating the podcast to gn

that said i do hope taako still gets a washing machine dropped on him <3 do this for me carey <3

#taz #taz balance #taz gn #taz gn spoilers #the suffering game #sorry it's long it was just SO juicy #didn't even mention them talkign about all the like technical art stuff carey also talked about color/panel composition to convey #info and mood

[jerreeeeeee]

Balance fic recs

some of my favorite balance fics. various ages, popularities, and lengths. i’ve been wanting to do a rec list for a while!

caramel by nevereverever

The first time Taako is left alone, it isn't pretty. But their lives are stuck in a loop and people come back and die again and again and he wonders if there will ever be a time when he doesn't have to fear being left alone.

2.7k, Taako & Lup Lup dies one cycle and then, years later, she dies again. But she always comes back. Hurt/comfort of the best kind.

Warmth by noxic

"It was a well-known fact among the residents of the Starblaster that Lup, Barry, and Taako slept in the same bed more often than not. It was one of those things that they just did without really talking about it."

2.1k, Barry & Lup & Taako The BLT fic of all time. Quality platonic adult sleepovers.

Taako the Matchmaker by @fantasysamsclub

In which Taako tries to set up his sister. Events take place during Stolen Century.

11.1k, Blupjeans & Taako Taako tries to set up blupjeans. Miscommunication ensues. Very sweet and funny.

red fishing line by @anistarrose

A routine performance of Sizzle it Up goes nightmarishly wrong, and at Lup’s bedside, Taako feels helpless. And when a red-robed guest appears before him, Taako doesn’t know how or what to feel at all.

3k, Barry & Lup & Taako Also the BLT fic of all time. Excellent subtle Taako characterization, and my favorite depiction of the familiarity-but-not of being voidfished. Warning for major character death.

Sunny-Side Up by @barry-j-blupjeans

And the world? The world loved Taako. For once in his gods-damned life, people loved him. They didn’t care about all the flaws, they didn’t care where he came from or who he was before. They loved his food and they loved him. No one would ever quite be at Taako’s level and that was something he thrived on. There would never be anyone who could measure up. Taako deserved this happiness. He worked for it. He wasted his fucking life away for it.

5.7k, Taako A wonderful character study, revolving around the role food plays in Taako's life. Fairly minor but impactful characters like Sazed and Taako's aunt are utilized in a very meaningful way. So well-written and warm. Warning for brief suicidal ideation.

On the Deck of the Starblaster by @papergardener

“What the… what are you all doing? We have work to do!” It’s a justified reaction, Lucretia thinks, to finding your entire crew literally lazing about on deck not an hour into this new cycle. “This one's on me,” Taako says. “It’s a new trend I like to call: taking a fucking break.” Cycle Nintey-Five. Everyone’s maybe not doing so good and could use a little warmth.

6.5k, Lucretia & Taako Near the end of the century, Lucretia is feeling rough. Taako pulls her out of her funk and initiates a much needed rest. Fantastic characterization, of Lucretia as a whole, and the loyal, warm side of Taako. Warning for mentions of a suicide attempt and suicidal ideation.

leaving, as an injustice by @anistarrose

When Mavis is eight, she starts finding her Dad asleep on the couch in the morning. Sometimes, he’s even all the way out on their tiny patio, with his head slumped onto a pillow atop the chess table, and bags beneath his eyes. In one of their following games, he tells her about tactical retreats.

4.7k, Mavis & Merle A study of Mavis and her relationship to Merle. Incredibly insightful into criminally underrated characters. Excellent Merle characterization.

Permission by vaguenotion

She’d been doing this on and off for the last hour, as if daring the men to catch up to them. Daring them to fight her. Every time seemed like a final stand. Here is where I will meet them, her shoulders said, hiked up around her ears. Here is where I’ll make them pay for what they’ve done. But then Taako would grab her hand, and she would turn and see the bruising on his throat, the blood drying on his brow, the tear in his shirt. And she would grip his hand in hers and together they would keep running.

12.6k, Taako & Lup My favorite depiction of the twins as children, both in character and realistic. Beautifully atmospheric, with so many small details that make the setting feel so real. Warning for assault and harm to children.

Come Hell or High Water by @nillial

“Taako,” Hurley asks, “where’s your magic umbrella?” Taako looks behind him. He had tossed the Umbrastaff in the path of a neighboring vehicle, which was beginning to catch up to them. He sees them now, far in the distance, and he sees his Umbrastaff, too, lying dangerously close to its wheels. As if on cue, he watches the tires crush it to pieces. “Whoops,” he says. - Lup is trapped. And then she isn’t. --- In which Taako breaks his umbrella during the Petals to the Metal race, unknowingly freeing Lup, who is almost immediately captured by Kravitz. After becoming a member of the Raven Queen's retinue with Kravitz as her trainer, she has two missions: 1) find her family, and 2) ruin Kravitz's afterlife. A story about enemies becoming friends and lost families finding their way back to one another.

197k (currently), Lup & Kravitz Incredible characterization. I love the way Lup is written. Hilarious shenanigans, sweet friendship-building, and terribly sad sometimes, because it dives deep into the reality of Lup existing in a world that's forgotten her.

Very cold water on a very hot day by @keplercryptids

Sometimes a family is a nerd who can't swim and the crunchy-haired watersport inventor who teaches him how. Surfer lingo required.

3.1k, Barry & Taako Deep dive into the beach year. Excellently in character, well-written dialogue, and a beautiful depiction of their growing friendship.

Children of Atlas by @papergardener

They’ve survived the apocalypse and now as far as they know, they’re the only ones left. Perhaps it was inevitable that they’d consider… repopulation. Lucretia writes up a weekly schedule to try and address that. Absolutely no one is happy with this.

76k (currently), IPRE crew The premise for this one is incredibly offputting, but I'm so glad I gave it a chance. The characterization and quality of writing is absolutely wonderful. I also love the attention to detail of the realistic difficulty of just surviving. Fantastically atmospheric, this fic dives deep into the uncertainty and fear of the first cycle, when the crew are all strangers, and the love that turns them into a family. Warning for extensive discussion of sexual assault.

Emissary Davenport by DragonWrites

A series of stories where Captain Davenport is secretly an emissary of Garl Glittergold, Gnomish god of pranks. And when you're a serious-minded captain on a mission to save all of reality, having a cheerful trickster god as your unexpected patron can get a little strange...

300k, Davenport A series of four works set in an AU where Davenport is an emissary to the leader of the gnomish pantheon. My absolute favorite depiction of Davenport, ever. The first three works are explorations of Davenport as a character and the relationships between people and gods in a DnD world. The last, Lost Gods, is the best fanfiction I've ever read. I can't express how good it is. The attention to detail among myriad plot threads, the building of themes, the characterization across just about every single character in Balance, all come together to create 223k words of a genuine masterpiece.

#apparently theres some kind of comment thing going on and people were making fic rec lists so i wanted to throw my hat in the ring #bc a few of these are very underrated #yes theyre all gen. i don't care for shipping. sorry #mine #taz #taz balance #the adventure zone #taz: b #taz fanfic #taz balance fic #fic rec

[clitfisto]

i think the common issue that creates boring dnd player characters is like. the fixation on backstory over character conflict. like if you think abt the typical "heres my super cool guy with a super cool design and a dark tragic backstory they dont want to talk about theyre so tortured and mysterious" its like. sure that might be an interesting secondary character for an animated series but thats not what this is.

like 1. nobody is going to see that cool design unless you painted a mini so youre just gonna be that guy who spends 5 minutes of session 1 describing your outfit; 2. none of the other players want to spend ages trying to interrogate backstory out of someone who seems like they dont want to share, they want to find a fight and flex their awesome build, so unless your dm pulls your 15 page backstory document into the main quest its all gonna be irrelevant anyway; and 3. trauma does not an interesting character make! not unless you can roleplay the effects of that trauma in a compelling manner!

imo its a wayyyy better method to come up with a Fucked Up Kinda Guy, complete with quirks and flaws and affectations and sure maybe a voice if thats your vibe, they dont need to be special or unique just fucking engaging to play beside, and THEN reverse engineer the backstory based on what would make someone be like that and usually its something fucked up and traumatic anyway bc thats how existing works. like dont get me wrong theres definitely merit to establishing your place in the setting but like. in taz balance absolutely no part of their written backstories did as much for the early group dynamic as "magnus rushes in" and "taako is good out here"

^ actually new different point based on that. if you show up with a blank slate guy then play off against the other characters! if you have a whole guy do it anyway! if someone is playing it safe then play impulsive or vice versa, if someone else has the same highest stat as you then get weirdly competitive, if someone plays dubious morals then be the ethical voice calling them out on it, there is no reason for your party to always be in agreement and if they are then disagree! be a dick about it! stories thrive on conflict so fucking make some, just please for the love of god do Anything that makes them behave differently than you with an ability

#source: i have played with some truly terrible pcs and they all had fascinating backstories

[sexiestpodcastcharacter]

Sexiest Podcast Character — Unscripted Bracket — Round 3

Propaganda

Glenn Close (Dungeons & Daddies):

#Propaganda for Glenn Close: one of the other PCs mentions multiple times how hot he is #Actually several characters point it out but especially Henry #Also the only person in a podcast that has to put a disclaimer about not being a BDSM podcast to have had sex during the course of the show

PLEASASSWEEPLEASE TOU DONT HUNRERFSTABDS

GLENN GLENN GLENN ITS GLENN VOTE GLENN VOTE FOR THE BOY

We didn’t do hot Glenn summer for him to LOSE. Spoilers for his story but MORE PROPAGANDA FOR YOU:

Young hot rocker dilf

Loyal to his dead wife <3

Does in fact smoke weed

BARD!! HES A BARD. HE WAS LEAD GUITAR IN HIS BAND (that he was kicked out of)

His band was a Christmas cover band btw.

Literally the fandom had hot Glenn summer which consisted of drawing him being incredibly hot and sexy

Anti government (ofc)

Kind of cringefail (Disney adult) (was on dilfs of disneyland)

Young and sexy not your style? Then how about HIM AFTER YEARS LOCKED IN A TIME PRISON WITH A DAMN HANNIBAL MASK ??

Lost an eye and wears a fucking eyepatch

One incredibly buff arm

Has a pet rat named after his son <3

Immeasurable amounts of trauma in this man- becomes progressively more unhinged

OH OLD HUMAN BARD ISNT CUTTING IT? FINE

HE BECOMES A FUCKING DEMON

A COOL HOT ONE-EYED DEMON WHO WANTS TO KILL HIS DAD (also sexy)

HE CANONICALLY ENDS CHRISTIAN HELL VIA CHRISTMAS

IS ALSO WAY OVERLEVELED

Becomes a demon hunter for the rest of his existence

Also nonwhite !!! We are done with cringefail whiteboys !!!!!!!!!

I can’t put into words ok just know he is the best plz love him.

GLENN GLENNNNNN

Listen, I don't know this other character but I've seem some good arguments for her However Consider Glenn Close winning through no effort of his own in a bullshit way despite being a dick is the most in character thing ever. He leveled up three times and got a crab mech, we GOT to give him this win, it's fitting

I haven't dedicated the last 2 months of my life drawing Glenn close for him to lose

Vote for Glenn Close or I will make you read the parody I did of the vaporeon copypasta

I don’t regulate if minors follow me or not bc I’m a pretty chill space but I hope the world is aware that’s the only reason I haven’t been downright nasty about Glenn close. I’m down bad. I’m NOT in the boat of ‘Glenn isn’t sexy but I want him to win bc it’s my fandom’. I would estimate I have 200+ drawings of Glenn on my phone that AREN’T safe for work. Way more that are. Where did they come from? That’s MY business. But I tell you this fact to assure you- Glenn IS sexy. I’m not voting to represent my fandom I’m voting out of TRUTH AND LOVE. IF YOU DON’T GET IT YOU DON’T GET IT!!! I just think my level of feral over this man is more powerful than y’all realize. If you don’t get his sex appeal that’s okay, but don’t doubt that this is my truth.

VOTE GLENN

Glenn fuckers fought tooth and nail to get us here from like 38% dawg we DESERVE THIS. GLENN IS THE SEXIEST MAN!!! HE WAS THE FIRST FICTIONAL CHARACTER I FOUND HOT AND HE’S GONNA CONTINUE TO SWEEP!!! Your hot goat woman sounds sexy don’t get me wrong but I’m forever fighting for the man that changed my brain chemistry. Proud of our fandom tbh. I don’t think y’all understand the sheer amount of effort I have put in to get my boy where he is today but this placement feels well earned. TO GLENN SWEEP!!

THE FUCK YOU MEAN GLENN CLOSE ISNT WINNING IM BOUT TO THROW HANDS FR

Okay but Glenn made a minivan cum by talking to her so

Yalll better vote glenn i swear to god

Vote Glenn or else the bird gets it🐦🛸

HOW IS MY DUDE NOT WINNING????

GLEN GELN NELG GLENNANN HE DESERVS ITTTT

HE HAS A BOOK THAT HE MARKS X’S AND CHECKS FOR EVERY DAY TO SEE IF THAT DAY WAS A SUCCESS OR NOT. TO SEE IF HE DID GOOD THAT DAY. ITS ALMOST ENTIRELY X’S. HE WAS CUCKED OUT OF A SON. AND A DEAD WIFE. HE DIDN’T EVEN GET TO KILL HIS DAD IN REVENGE. There’s absolutely nothing going for him except his sex appeal in his life. Nobody he loved remembers him. He lost his eye. All he has is a pet rat and friends who admit they don’t really like him that much. He was kicked out of his own band. The band was named after him. He was kicked out of the Glenn Close trio. All he could do was deez nuts the big bad and be sexy. If nothing else, then pity him. Look in his eyes. Look at his heart and soul. Do you think pickman needs this to feel good about herself? Can she not accept a loss for the sake of a pathetic father? Can she shake hands with the minivan fucker and his human gun and just take the L on this one? He did not do the BDSM episode for this I’ll tell you what. Do this for my his sake. Do it for Nick Jr, who needs the prize money to pay for his rat snacks. Do it for his son. For Morgan. Ganbatte.

Mod Note: While I will still take "bad dads are sexy" propaganda and "bad dads aren't sexy" anti-propaganda, I kindly request no more discussion on whether or not he was a bad father. This is a sexypoll, not a parentingpoll. If you see a post you strongly disagree with, you can just not reblog it.

Taako (The Adventure Zone: Balance):

A celebrity chef from another plane

#Round 3 #Glenn Close #Taako #Dungeons & Daddies #Dungeons and Daddies #The Adventure Zone #TAZ Balance

[dogs2shouldvote]

during my latest relisten of taz balance, i recorded every line i found even the slightest bit funny with zero context, not even who said it (though some are pretty obvious). here’s all my favorites!!

“i’m probably studying.. my cantrips”

“just say mastrubating, dad”

“don’t come in mom i’m studying my canteips!!”

.

“yeah you’ll do any dumb shit”

.

“it’s like a bag of holding! but for.. ass.”

.

“do we know how much damage we did to him?”

“six damage, you said it out loud with your mouth.”

.

“it should be in the player’s handbook! get your salty snack to enjoy while you play dnd”

.

“my grandpa says it’s rude to whisper. especially on a train!”

.

“i’m not going to go toe to toe with a crab while youre armed with a terrible scottish accent and travis doesn’t even have his sheild. i’m out! … did i say travis? i mean leman kessler.”

“nope! that was wrong all the way around.”

.

“i’m cosplaying taako right now, as a stupid man.”

.

“who’s just rolling dice? who is doing secret checks that i don’t know about?”

.

“i always waste my 20’s on perception checks. like i give a shit.”

.

“it’s completely conceivable he would have a name tag.”

“IN A GANG?”

.

“like a pelt??? like a bramble*pelt*?????”

.

“is there a math check? what are you talking about?”

“yeah it’s your fucking brain. you use your brain to add numbers together”

“16”

“what are you fucking doing??”

.

“griffin i love you youre my brother. but if my skill called history doesn’t literally help me with history trivia questions in a category called history what are we FUCKING doing here??”

.

“can i ask you a question? are you guys mean to everyone?”

.

“fus-ro-over dere”

.

“that one was actually a badass bernie sanders”

.

“hey thug! what’s your name? i’m about to tentacle your dick.”

.

“a d6 is like some dice ass dice. that’s some monopoly shit.”

.

“i thought you were saying merle, it’s his bread and his body, take 2d6 healing points”

.

“you two remind me of something… you remind me of the babe! and then i throw the glass sphere at them.”

.

“make a constitution saving throw to see if you can eat this fucking rock with your mouth.”

.

“dungeons and dragons is a. great game.”

.

“my name is magnus burnsides”

“marchins burchens”

.

“magnus would not say that. however, travis would.”

.

“can we please not talk about chekhov’s bush?”

.

“we’ve got a ball, a sack, and a tool!”

“everything is gross here in dnd.”

.

“only losers smoke, isaac.”

“i give isaac an hour long lecture about the dangers of smoking.”

.

“i’m just gonna put my mouth down there and go buck wild”

.

“there’s a lot of go cart tracks called the adventure zone and i’ve been working with my lawyer to shut them all down forever”

.

“does taako fish?”

“yeah taako fishes.”

.

“a rock hard-“

*justin, clint, and travis laugh*

“come ON, *really*?”

.

“taako rushes in!”

“what! magnus follows him.”

“merle’s good out here!”

“WHAT is going on?”

.

“how do you not have a d6 it comes with every board game”

“my daughter-“

“eats them for power???”

.

“uhhh how much health do you have.”

“im not gonna tell you.”

.

“let’s see… i am going to hurt jenkins. with a magical spell.”

.

“this is about to become the taako show starring taako.”

.

“BLUFF FUCKING BLUFF O’CLOCK?? WHAT IS THIS, HALF PAST PERSUASION TIME??”

.

“i’m not laughing in game” *justin fucking loses it*

.

“she’s the best at burning shit ever.”

.

“traaav griffin got to do his show for so long and now he’s gonna destroy yours.”

.

“fucking lup finds like. a gun.”

.

“for sure, keep it sleazy. we’re out, bye!”

.

“i have to believe…. i’m gonna get those fifteen dollars back from greg fucking grimaldis”

.

“based on the rules of the game, dad… you die.”

.

“dad’s making a jerk off motion at me”

.

“don’t play the pennywise card like you ALWAYS try to”

.

“should i talk slower so that everybody who has been complaining about us not playing dnd has time to nut?”

.

“i am a wizard. my name is taako. and i am pretty well fucked.”

.

“yeah i’ve got cumin who do you think i am?”

.

“hear that, babe? we’re *legends*”

.

“i’m clint mcelroy and i played merle hightower-“

“nope”

#i actually have a ton more #taz balance #taz balance spoilers #kinda #the adventure zone balance #mcelroys #taz #the adventure zone #mcelroy brothers #taako taaco #merle highchurch #magnus burnsides

[anistarrose]

Forgot about the part in The Suffering Game where Justin describes Taako thinking of Magnus and Merle as "these clowns that have fixed onto him, barnacle-like, as he tries to save the earth." It's just something about the way Taako, for all the "good out here," half-seriously thinks of himself as the planet-saving hero, and Magnus and Merle as his sidekicks. The way he tries to fully pin the blame for the three of them being joined at the hip onto anyone but Taako himself. I love the way that Taako makes quips to completely brush off how much the other boys mean to him bleeds into Justin talking about their dynamic too. I love them so much.

#taz #taz balance #thb #taako taaco #merle highchurch #magnus burnsides

[emiko-matsui]

justin mcelroy makes one type of character and it's taako "good out here" taaco, duck "i gave up saving the world to eat french onion soup" newton, and master "i vill vait in the car" firbolg

#the adventure zone #taz #justin mcelroy #taako #duck newton #master firbolg #taz balance #taz amnesty #taz graduation #taako taaco

[fandomssaremysoul]

Not to be in my Taz Balance feels but..

Sometimes Taako, before Accident during his show, would totally zone out while cooking and ends up preparing the table for seven people, but he doesn't remember why,,,, sometimes he'd encounter a new animal or a beautiful plant and muse about how they would have loved this,, but who were they??

Sometimes Merle would get bored and start shuffling a deck of cards, only to split it and realizing that no one was coming to play, and what were even the rules for this game? (bc he and davenport would come up with new games, with wild rules just to fuck around with the rest of the crew) Merle once bought a beautiful pastel blue journal bc he thought that she (she? Which she?) would appreciate the craftsmanship,, he got really confused while wrapping it into a godawful wrapping paper,, who was he gonna give this? (later the journal would find its way to Lucretia, not without a crude joke about plants, a badly drawn dog and a motivational quote, she sobbed when she saw it, but only after sending the three to their next mission)

Magnus always carved ducks, he didn't know why or how he learned he just knew how to. Sometimes he would finish a particularly good duck and smile, then he'd stand up, Intending to give it to... To whom? Nobody really wanted the ducks, except for kids usually. Sometimes he would wonder the forest, looking for some good wood, when he'd suddenly think, I need to go back I was supposed to stay on the.. On the what? No wait that doesn't make sense, he's not supposed to be anywhere and no one is gonna be annoyed bc he forgot he it was his turn to wait... To wait for what though? sometimes he read a book and called out for an explanation but the man? Person? Didn't answer and Mangus who did you call out for? You're alone (months, years later he'd pick up a book from his friends Taakos collection and get an explanation,, but the feeling of rightness but not quite, expecting someone warmer and someone more patient to explain it to him,, it didn't help when Taakos first instinct was to say "don't ask me idiot do I look like a nerd ask,.." and then he stopped only to shake his head bc who else could Magnus ask if he was the only wizard here)

The trio doesn't know why or how but finally, when they met, finally someone understood that the days were somehow not hot enough, that they were always just a bit too chilly

#Oh fuck #I forgot I wrote this lol #Taz #the adventure zone #taako taaco #taako from tv #sizzle it up with taako #magnus burnsides #taz merle #merle highchurch #taz balance #Balance arc #Void fish fuckery #Seven birds #davenport taz

[barry-j-blupjeans]

Barry was starting to wish he had bought a suitcase with a handlebar and wheels. Lup and Taako's apartment was on the third story up and, much like Lup had told him, the elevator was still in its constant state of disrepair. At the very least, a suitcase with a handlebar would be easier to lug up here. His back was already aching from the ride over (his body was not fit for airplane seats anymore) and this certainly wasn't helping.

But it'd be worth it. Tonight, for the first time ever, he and Lup would meet face-to-face. And Taako too. He was excited to see Taako. He had heard lots of good things about Taako. But he had never really talked to the guy outside of voice or video calls with him in the background and Barry- well, he had a soft spot for Lup.

That's what he told Magnus, at least, when he bought the plane ticket. Leaving Magnus to housesit didn't seem like a great plan, but Barry had no one else to turn to. Asking his coworkers felt weird and approaching any of his neighbors with the idea seemed even worse. Magnus, at the very least, was capable of fixing anything he broke. Probably. And was willing to do it for free as long as he was allowed to bring his dogs with him (he was, but Barry was very much hoping he didn't have to clean dog slobber off anything when he got back).

Magnus had seemed… uncertain about his plan. Flying halfway across the country without telling the other person you'd be there was, admittedly, not always a good idea. But Barry had planned this through. He and Lup had talked a lot about meeting up one day. What they'd want to do together, where they'd go, the plans they had. She offered to let him crash on the couch and Barry was 100% okay with that. It saved on hotel costs, at least.

And Lup loved surprises! Most of the time! Lup loved the surprises that Barry came up with, at least.

Barry paused at the third story, leaning against the wall to try to get his breathing under control. He had tried to only pack essentials, but that had quickly turned into "oh, I wanna show Lup this thing in person" and, "oh, Lup wanted to have this but I forgot to mail it to her", and "oh, Lup would-", et cetera, et cetera.

After a minute, he finally got his breathing under control. He straightened up and his back popped in at least four different places. Pathetically, he started dragging his suitcase down the hall. 310, 311, 312…

113. Lup and Taako's apartment.

Barry knocked before he could start overthinking it.

Lup would be happy to see him, right? Right. Definitely. She was cool like that.

Seconds ticked by. Barry fanned himself, suddenly feeling too hot. It was from bringing the suitcase up, that's all. He wasn't nervous. He lov- he liked Lup a lot and he wanted to make a good first impression. Second impression? He wasn't sure what it was when you've been talking to someone for years but have only just now seen them in real life.

It must have been a full minute by now. Barry raised his hand, trying to figure out if it'd be a good idea to knock again, but the door opened before he could make up his mind.

It was Taako. All of his opening plans came crashing to a halt. He opened his mouth and just kind of made a strangled sound. He cleared his throat and went to try again, or at least try to ask if Lup was home, but-

"Barry?" Taako asked.

"Yeah," Barry said, hopefully sounding confident and casual. It came out a little like he was choking down a jolly rancher.

"Fuck," Taako said. He shut the door in Barry's face.

Barry… didn't know what to do in this situation. He was hoping for a "hey!" or maybe even an "it's Barry!". This was so wildly off-script from what he had imagined he didn't know how to move forward. Luckily, Taako opened the door again and practically pulled him inside before shutting it again.

The inside of the apartment was warm and cozy and exactly what Barry thought it would be. He recognized the couch where he and Lup often had long conversations via the internet. He could see the beginnings of the kitchen as Taako pulled him further inside. A man popped out from one of the other rooms. Barry vaguely recognized him as Taako's boyfriend. Kravitz, he was pretty sure.

"Barry?" Kravitz said incredulously.

"Hey," Barry said. Taako steered him towards the couch. It was so soft.

"But Lup-" Kravitz started.

"We're getting there," Taako said. He was standing in front of Barry now as Barry sat on the couch. Kravitz leaned over the edge of the sofa. Taako took a deep breath. "Okay. So. Wanna tell me what the fuck you're doing at our apartment, Barold?"

"Uhm," Barry said. "Visting?"

"Visting me?" Taako said.

"I mean," Barry said. "I- I would definitely like to hang out with you too, but, uhm-"

"Lup," Taako sighed. He rubbed at his temples, as if he was developing a headache. "Okay, Barry, I'm gonna need you and Lup to get like, a shared calendar or maybe like- any type of clear communication, 'cus she's not here."

"Like, she's at work, or-?"

"Lup got on a plane at nine AM this morning," Taako said, "to go to fuckin' Maine! to visit your sorry ass."

"Ah," Barry said. Okay. Okay, okay, okay. Sure, yeah, okay. Yeah, yeah, yeah. This was fine. This was normal. This was an everyday thing to him. He was pretty sure stuff like this happened all the time.

"You," Taako said, "are gonna call Lup and tell her she's a dumbass."

"I'm not gonna call Lup a-"

"She'll call you," Taako said. "'Cus you're both real fucking stupid, y'know that? Like, if you're gonna visit your partner then at least call before you show up-!"

"We're not- we're not dating," Barry said, blushing despite himself.

"Uh-huh," Taako said. "Sure."

"We're not!" Barry said. It seemed Lup and Taako had the same "I don't believe that at all" face.

His phone started ringing. Taako's look intensified at the I Will Always Love You by Whitney Houston ringtone. Barry's face got even hotter.

"It's a good song," he insisted, struggling to get the phone out of his pocket. The caller ID showed up as Lup.

"Answer the fucking phone, Barold," Taako said.

Barry sighed, answering it. He pressed it up against his ear, unsure if he wanted to laugh or cry at Lup's voice. Maybe both.

"So, uhhhh, we've got a problem," Lup said.

Definitely both.

#blupjeans #barry bluejeans #taako #taz #taz balance #mine #ise cube writing

[chucktaylorupset]

finally watched the addams family movie and Y’ALL.  this is what you mean when you say you want an addams?  i do NOT want an addams, and addams is too much work, gomez has to get up SO EARLY to sword fight the very sun for morticia, i would not be doing that i would be asleep.  to be an addams is to love your spouse like no one’s watching except that you’re in PUBLIC at an AUCTION and the whole world, the entire town, is in fact watching, the spirit is willing to flirt but the flesh is on the floor in a melted puddle of embarrassment

“i want an addams” i could barely handle being the addams’ tax accountant.  i could at most be an addams babysitter as long as i go home at the end of the night so i can have a regularly scheduled nervous breakdown in my car over the latest assassination attempt on pugsley from wednesday.  you go move into that house, taako’s good out here baby

#my post #the addams family

[umbraastaff]

Answers presented alphabetically. If you feel equally strong about multiple answers, you can choose randomly, or choose as if you're voting to guarantee at least that character will be trans in a good fic that you'll like.

#the adventure zone #taz balance #ipre #seven birds #taz polls #mine #polls #balance #for research bc sb commented abt something related to this (wrt fandom popularity of some hcs) and i was surprised? #so i want to know... the Truth...