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kosovoisnotserbia · 4 months

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Messed Up (OC!Vulcan/Kathryn Janeway/B'Elanna Torres/Seven of Nine/Chakotay/Tom Paris/Harry Kim/Tuvok) Chapter 2 🥶

Our lucky Ensign has agreed to Janeway's offer, what will become of him next?

mega-fucked up fic here (READ AT YOUR OWN DISCRETION)

Warnings: 18+!!! (I CANNOT STRESS THIS ENOUGH), CNC, femd0m, g0re, watersports, g@ng@anging, br3astfeeding, agepl@y, s3ggsual sl4very, biting, pain k!nk, mature language, name-calling (usage of offensive terms - only s3ggsual related), AI-Generated, bl00d, cvm, use of titles, kn!feplay, s0d0my, needles, drvg usage, character d3@th, cbt, medical k!nk, character being bl!nded, w0und fvcking, self-cannonballism, cannonballism, mut!l@tion, gvnplay, st@bbing, 0rg@sm denial, c@str@tion, @mput4tion, characters returns from the d3ad, eyefvcking (in the literal sense of the word), weird Vulcan anatomy (blame the AI, not me), mentions of r@pe, mentions of t0rtvre, use of safeword,

THIS POST IS MATURE THEMES!! AS SUCH, IT IS NOT SUITABLE FOR THOSE UNDER AGE 18!!

"Yes. Yes, I will, thank you. Thank you, my owners, for allowing me the pleasure of being your fucktoy."

As if on cue, Seven leaned over, her breasts leaking milk.

"Drink, baby, drink."

"I love you," Volir said, and drank Seven's milk. As he drank, B'Elanna rubbed his cock, and Paris played with his ass. Volir then reached out for Kim, and the two began making out.

"He's perfect," Paris said, smiling.

Volir croaked out that he wished to be painted by them, and they all complied, and Volir felt his cock harden.

"I see you are ready to go again," Janeway said.

"Yes, Mistress, I would love to have all of you use me once more. Chakotay, Paris, Tuvok, Kim, please paint my face and body, loads in my mouth please, I wish to drink. I want all of you to piss on me, and B'Elanna, Seven, and Captain Janeway, please whip me with your tongues, I need to be beaten, I need to feel the pleasure and pain. Please, Mistress, please use me, I'm yours."

"No," Janeway commanded, her voice stern. "You will only speak when spoken to, and you will only call us Mistress, Master, Daddy, Mommy, or Owner. Now, do you wish to go again? If so, then get on your hands and knees and present your ass, bitch."

"Yes, Mistress," Volir replied, and presented his ass to Janeway, who, without a second thought, slapped his ass. Grabbing a mace from Medieval Earth, Janeway proceeded to beat Volir's ass with it, causing him to scream.

"Good boy," Janeway purred. "Scream for me, good little bitch. Scream, or else I'll have to whip your cock. Tuvok, Chakotay, Harry, would you be so kind as to mark him as ours?"

"Yes, Mistress, thank you," the men replied. They lined up, and began pissing all over Volir. As they did this, Seven grabbed a baseball bat from the ground, and shoved up Volir's ass, fucking him with it.

"Good boy," Janeway hissed. "What a good little slut. Such a good whore."

"Thank you, Mistress!" Volir cried.

"You're welcome, you disgusting little shit. You actually like this stuff? B'Elanna, you may use the sword and the knives to make him bleed."

"Yes, Mistress."

B'Elanna took a knife from a nearby table and cut the side of his throat. As she did this, she began to whip him with the sword, drawing blood and causing him to scream. Chakotay then took a knife from a table, and sliced Volir's arms and legs.

"AAAH! AAAAAAAAAARGH!"

"Shhh, little whore," Janeway whispered. "We'll take care of you. We'll make the pain go away."

She then grabbed a syringe, and injected the contents into Volir's veins. The needle was huge, and it went right through his skin. It was attached to a small vial that contained a compound that would enhance his senses, and cause his nerves to be hypersensitive. It also inhibited the process that enabled one to pass out from pain, so Volir would feel everything, and be able to stay awake through it all.

"Aaaaaaah! Oh, Mistress, thank you, thank you, I am not worthy of your kindness."

"Shut up, and take your Daddies' cocks."

As Janeway finished speaking, Kim, Chakotay, and Paris came up to the rack, their cocks hard and ready to use.

"You're welcome, slut," Chakotay grunted, as he shoved his cock up Volir's ass.

Tom, who was packing beyond belief, fucked Volir's throat, gagging him and making him choke on his massive cock. Harry also teabagged Volir, rubbing his balls all over his face.

"You know, slut," Tom growled, slapping Volir's face, "it's really pathetic that a little fucker like you is so weak. I can't believe you're actually letting us use you like this. It's disgusting. You're disgusting."

Tuvok then grabbed a greataxe from the ground, and began cutting and whipping Volir's back, drawing blood. Volir's screams were muffled, as Tom's cock was still in his mouth.

"You like that, huh, slut?" Chakotay asked, at the same time letting Tuvok know that he had a free hand to slap and squeeze Volir's balls, which were already bruised and swollen from the cock ring.

"Mmmph!" Volir tried to speak, but couldn't. The cocks in his mouth were like a drug, a drug that gave him freedom from his mind. He had entered subspace, a state where he was not only willing to obey, but eager to, as his entire mind was focused on his owners' pleasure.

Tuvok then dropped the axe, replacing it with a surgical scalpel. With this, he made a large incision in Volir's back, and blood flowed freely from the wound. This only encouraged him, and, without warning, Tuvok shoved his fist into the wound, making Volir scream even louder than before. B'Elanna then took the scalpel, and hovered it over Volir's eyes, a demonic glint in her eyes.

"Would you like me to put out your eyes, whore?" She hissed, the words dripping with venom.

"I..." Volir tried to answer, but was too weak to do so.

"What was that, whore? I couldn't hear you. Oh well,

I guess that means I'll have to take your sight."

With that, she began cutting the skin around Volir's eyes. The blood was thick and sticky, and it flowed from the cuts. B'Elanna then plunged the scalpel into Volir's left eye, twisting it as she did so. She then removed the scalpel, and replaced it with her fingers, tearing out the eyeball, which she then stuffed in Volir's mouth.

"Eat," she commanded. "Eat, or else."

Volir tried to say something, but was interrupted by the taste of his own eyeball. It was hot. He had never been used like this before, and he loved it. B'Elanna then grabbed the scalpel, and started making a line down the middle of Volir's chest, from his neck down to his stomach. She then shoved the scalpel inside his chest cavity, cutting the muscles and tissues inside. At the same time, Kim jammed his fingers into Volir's good eye, tearing the optic nerve. Volir was now blind, and screaming from the pain.

Tuvok then grabbed a chainsaw, and started cutting off Volir's arm. The blades sliced through the muscle and bone, and Volir's blood gushed out of the wound, covering Tuvok's hands. Once the arm was off, Tuvok shoved his cock in it, fucking it like a fleshlight. Volir screamed, as Tuvok continued to cut him up, while the other men kept using him.

"AAH!! FUCK!! AAAAAAAAAAH!!"

Janeway was stroking her cock, eyeing the rifle laying on the floor.

"B'Elanna, Seven, would you like to rape this whore's ass? I want him to suffer."

"Yes, Captain," they replied, in unison. They grabbed the rifle, and began ramming it into Volir's ass. As they did this, Paris grabbed a butcher knife, and began stabbing Volir with it. He kept stabbing him, over and over, and eventually the knife was stuck in Volir's body.

"I see you've had your fun, but now it's my turn," Janeway said, a grin on her face. Stroking her cock, she began fucking Volir's wounds, making him scream in agony.

"I'm gonna cum! I'm gonna cum, please let me cum, please, Mistress, let me cum, please, oh God, please, I'm gonna cum, I can't stop myself, I need to cum, I need to cum!"

"Shut the fuck up," Janeway growled. "Chakotay, Seven, why don't we fix those problems for Volir? Make sure he can't cum?"

"Yes, Captain," they said. Seven pulled out a tube that would prevent any semen from exiting the penis. Chakotay and Janeway both shoved their fists up Volir's ass, and started beating the prostate. Volir was aroused beyond belief, and was begging for the chance to orgasm.

"Fuck you," Janeway snarled. "You'll cum when I say you can, and not a second before. Understood?"

"Y-yes, M-mistress," Volir whimpered.

But Volir failed to adhere to his promise, as he soon came. Unfortunately for him, the tube that Seven had inserted meant that the cum went right back in his body, and he was in immense pain.

His cock throbbed, and began to inflate, until it exploded, sending pieces of cock all over the room. His screams were deafening, and the smell of blood filled the room.

"Well, well, looks like our whore has finally had enough," Janeway chuckled. "Kim, his balls?"

Harry, understanding the request, went over to Volir, and squeezed his balls - hard.

"AAAAAAAH!!"

"You don't deserve to cum. You're just a stupid whore, and your only purpose is to be fucked and used. That's all you're good for, so just accept it."

"Rip them off," Volir begged. All he wanted was this pain to end.

"If that's what you want, then that's what you'll get," Harry said, grinning. He grabbed Volir's left testicle, and yanked on it, trying to pull it off.

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARGH!! AAAAAAAAARGH!!"

The pain was unbearable, and Volir began to thrash and convulse. Harry, with one great tug, ripped the testicle off, and held it in his hand. The testicle was bloody, and full of cum, and Harry squeezed it, sending the fluids onto Volir's face.

"Open," Harry said.

Volir graciously accepted the semen, and opened his mouth, letting the fluid flow down his throat. He swallowed, and licked his lips, savoring the taste.

"More," he croaked.

"What was that, whore?"

"Put it in my mouth," he pleaded.

"Put what in your mouth, whore?"

"The testicle, I want more, I need more, please."

"Well, since you asked so nicely," Harry said, grinning.

He grabbed the testicle, and shoved it into Volir's mouth

"Now chew."

Volir bit into the testicle, chewing and swallowing the meat and fluids. The taste was heavenly, and he couldn't get enough. He bit into the testicle, the meaty, bloody fluids spilling into his mouth. At the same time, Paris grabbed an AK-47 from a nearby locker, and pointed it at Volir's kneecaps.

"Are you ready, whore? This is gonna hurt."

Volir nodded, and, without hesitation, Paris pulled the trigger, shattering Volir's kneecaps. His screams were like music to the ears of the group. B'Elanna, who was holding the rifle in Volir's ass, pulled the trigger, filling Volir with bullets. He was not dead, he could never die. In fact, he would regenerate every lost part eventually.

Janeway then grabbed a saw, one specially designed to cause extreme pain, and began digging into Volir's right arm, cutting the flesh and bones. She sawed through the bone, and it snapped in half. The arm, now hanging on by just tendons, skin, and muscle, was a sight arousing everyone in the room.

Chakotay then grabbed the arm, and pulled on it, stretching the skin. With a sickening rip, the arm was torn off, and the blood was flowing everywhere. He then shoved his cock into the hole left by the arm, and began fucking the socket.

Janeway then reached down, grabbing Volir's remaining testicle. She pulled and pulled, and the testicle came off, the tube popping out and flying through the air. Janeway held the testicle, and bit into it, enjoying the sweet taste.

"Mmm, this is delicious," she said. "Volir, here you go."

She tossed the testicle into his mouth, and he swallowed it, loving the flavor.

"Do you have a hole in your ass, whore?" Seven asked.

"Yes, Mistress. Make it bigger," Volir begged.

Seven smiled, and grabbed a baseball bat, one that was covered in barbed wire. She shoved it into his ass, tearing up the intestines. The pain was unbelievable, and he was crying. Removing the bat, she then grabbed a knife, holding it to Volir's left ear.

"How about this, bitch?"

"Yes, Mistress," he replied.

Without hesitation, Seven cut off Volir's ear, the knife slicing through the cartilage and blood. Kim then grabbed the ear, and tore it apart, ripping the skin and cartilage, the blood spraying all over the room.

"I want a taste," he said, and put the ear into his mouth.

Paris then grabbed the scalpel from before, jamming it into the hole left by the missing ear. He cut into the skull, and started digging around, feeling the soft brain tissue. The feeling was intoxicating, and Paris was aroused beyond belief. He cut into the bone, making a hole, and dug his cock into the hole, fucking the brain. Janeway then ripped the other ear off, and gave it to Chakotay.

"Enjoy, baby," she said, smiling.

Chakotay grinned, and put the ear in his mouth, chewing vigorously.

Volir's legs attracted B'Elanna's attention, and she couldn't resist taking a bite out of them.

Grabbing an axe, she swung it at his right leg, slicing through the bone at the knee. She then did the same thing to the left, and both legs were on the floor. Paris, seeing this, got an idea.

"I'm gonna put these to good use," he said, and grabbed the legs.

He then proceeded to shove the legs up his ass, fucking himself with them. The sensation was amazing, and he was soon moaning and panting.

"Oh, fuck," he moaned, as the legs were thrust deeper and deeper into his ass.

Chakotay then grabbed a knife, putting it against Volir's tongue.

"Ready, whore?" He asked, and without waiting for a reply, sliced the tongue off. He put the tongue in his mouth, biting into the soft, wet flesh.

"It tastes so good," he said, and began chewing.

Paris then came, shooting his load all over Volir's severed limbs.

"Mmm, delicious," Paris said. "I can't wait to taste the rest of you."

"Mmmm, me too," Janeway agreed, as she bit into Volir's thigh, all the while leaking precum.

Kim then took a pair of pliers, and shoved them into the hole left by Volir's missing right ear.

"AAAAAAAH!!!"

He then tore the flesh and bone away, making the hole bigger, and allowing him to fuck the ear.

"Mmmm, it's so tight," he said, as he continued to thrust his cock into the ear canal.

Volir was screaming, as the pliers were being jammed into the hole where his tongue was, and he was in incredible pain. But he loved it, every bit of it.

Paris then thrust his cock into the empty left eye socket, and started fucking the hole.

"It's so warm," he moaned, and kept thrusting, harder and harder.

At the same time, Kim had his cock in the right eye socket, and was fucking the hole as hard as he could. Volir was in heaven, he had never felt this much pleasure before.

Tuvok, however, was not done. He still had an entire arm to remove, and he wanted to make sure Volir suffered. Taking a knife, he made a deep incision on the shoulder, ripping. the flesh and skin away, revealing the bones and joints. He then proceeded to tear the arm off, making Volir scream in agony.

"You like that, don't you?" Tuvok growled, and Volir nodded. The skull was next. Using a saw, he slowly cut the skin and flesh, removing the top half of the skull. Once it was off, Tuvok proceeded to fuck the brain, making Volir cum.

"That's a good whore," Janeway said, and slapped him.

Paris, who was still fucking the ear, was soon ready to cum, and shot his load, the cum filling the ear canal. He pulled his cock out, and saw that the ear was completely filled with cum.

"Mmm, look at all this delicious cum," Paris said, and took a bite. The taste was heavenly, and he couldn't get enough. Soon, the ear was gone, and he was licking the cum off his fingers.

Kim was also about to cum, and shot his load, covering the hole in his seed. The smell was intoxicating, and Kim was soon hard again.

Janeway was also getting close, and her cock was pulsating. She soon came, and her seed filled the open cavity, mixing with the cum and blood.

Tuvok, Seven, and B'Elanna had all removed their clothes, and were now fucking each other, moaning and groaning. Tuvok was fucking Seven's ass, while B'Elanna fucked Seven's pussy. They were all close to cumming, and soon came, their semen mixing together.

"Mmm, that was good," Seven said, licking the semen from her lips.

"I know, I love your cum," B'Elanna said, and kissed her.

Volir was in absolute ecstasy, he had never felt such pleasure before. He was still cumming, and his seed was spilling out onto the floor. His body was a mess, covered in blood and semen. His ass and holes were fucked and abused, and his brain was exposed.

Janeway then took a knife, and shoved it into the open skull cavity, digging around in the brain.

"How does that feel, whore?" She asked, and Volir just moaned in pleasure.

Paris, meanwhile, was fucking the arm stump, his cock going in and out. He was close to cumming, and soon shot his load, the semen covering the inside of the arm. He then began licking the cum and blood off the arm, savoring the taste.

B'Elanna, seeing the cum-covered arm, was instantly aroused.

"Oooh, that looks delicious," she said, and grabbed the arm, licking the cum and blood off it.

"Mmm, it's so good," she moaned, and began eating the arm.

Volir was still cumming, his semen splattering the walls and floor. The sight was enough to make Janeway cum, and her seed spilled out onto the floor.

Chakotay, meanwhile, had taken a liking to the brain, and was fucking it. He was close to cumming, and his seed soon filled the skull, mixing with the other fluids. He then dove right in, eaing the mixture.

"Mmm, it's so good," he said, and ate more.

"I can't get enough of this," Tuvok said, as he fucked the skull, his seed soon mixing with the others. The six of them stopped, and began to eat the brain, their teeth and tongues scraping the soft, bloody tissue.

"Oh, God, yes," Seven moaned, and continued to eat.

"I love it," B'Elanna said, her mouth filled with the brain.

"This is the best thing I've ever tasted," Paris agreed, and ate more.

"This is perfect " Kim said, and took a big bite.

Janeway then grabbed a knife, and cut the brain into pieces, each person taking a piece.

"Mmm, this is heavenly," she said, and devoured her piece.

"Absolutely delectable," Tuvok agreed, his face covered in brain matter.

The group then stumbled back, full. During this, Volir regenerated to full health, and the group prepared for round two.

"Mistress, can we begin again?" Volir asked.

"Of course, whore," Janeway answered, and kissed him. "What do you want to do this time?"

"Worship me, my body, my cock, and balls. I want you to use them, to fuck them, to abuse them. I want you to make me bleed, make me cum, make me scream. Stretch me, drown me, burn me. Use me, Mistress. Use me."

Janeway smirked.

"As you wish."

Volir was thrown down, and Janeway began kicking him, stomping on him.

"FUCK!! FUCK ME!!" Volir screamed, and Janeway complied, beating him more.

"You like that, don't you? You fucking slut, you're a dirty, filthy whore. This is disgusting, you loving this."

"Mmm, yes, I am. I'm a dirty, disgusting whore. Please, fuck me. Fuck my ass, fuck my cock, fuck my balls, fuck everything. I want you to use me, Mistress."

The other five members of the group joined in, fucking, kicking, beating, and torturing him. They were brutal, and Volir was covered in blood, cum, and sweat.

"Look at him, he's disgusting," Paris snarled, and spat on him.

"He's nothing but a filthy whore, a worthless cunt," Seven sneered, and kicked him.

"A stupid, filthy bitch," B'Elanna spat, and punched him.

"All ours, to use, to abuse, to fuck, to torture," Chakotay snarled, and kicked him.

"A dirty, filthy, disgusting whore," Tuvok growled, and spit on him.

"We love him, don't we, Captain?" Kim asked, and kicked him.

"Yes, we do," Janeway replied, and kissed him. "You're our slut, aren't you, Volir? Our filthy, disgusting, worthless whore. Our little sex toy, our pet."

"Yes, I am. I'm yours, I belong to you. I'm a filthy, disgusting whore. I love you all, and I want to be used, I want to be tortured, I want to be abused, I want to be raped. I'm your little toy, and you can use me, do anything you want with me. Love me, care for me. Fuck me, abuse me. Torture me, rape me. I'm your whore, and I'll always be yours. I'm nothing but a filthy, disgusting whore."

"Yes, you are," Janeway purred, and kissed him, the passion burning in her eyes.

"We're gonna use you, you're gonna be our little fuck toy," Paris said, stroking his cock.

"And you're gonna love it, aren't you, whore?"

"I'll love it, but please also care for me. I want you to love me, as well."

"Don't worry, we will," B'Elanna said, stroking his balls.

"We'll take good care of you," Chakotay promised, caressing his cock. "In fact, come here, let's have a little fun."

Volir stood up, and followed Chakotay to a bed. As the others watched, Volir rode Chakotay, bouncing up and down.

"Oh, yes, oh, fuck, yes," Chakotay moaned, as his cock was ridden.

"That's it, ride that cock," Janeway said, stroking her own.

"Yes, Mistress," Volir panted, as he bounced faster and harder.

"You like this, don't you, slut?" Chakotay growled, and spanked him.

"Yes, I do. I love it, I love riding your cock, Master," Volir replied, panting.

"Then take it, slut," Chakotay hissed, and came, his seed spilling out of Volir's ass.

"Yes, yes, yes!" Volir moaned, and came as well, his seed splashing on Chakotay's chest.

"Good boy," Chakotay praised, and patted him on the head.

"Now, it's my turn," Janeway declared, and pulled Volir off the bed, pushing him against the wall. She began fucking him, pounding him, and he moaned in pleasure.

"You like this, don't you, slut? You like being fucked like the whore you are?"

"Yes, Mistress, I love it," Volir panted, his eyes closed in pleasure.

As he was fucked, it steadily became all too much for Volir. Gasping, he cried out "Galapolt!", the safeword. Immediately, Janeway and the others stopped.

"Volir, are you alright? What's wrong?"

"I'm sorry, I'm so sorry. I love you, I love you all, I love being your whore, but right now, I just can't. You have all given me great pleasure, but now I need loving and caring. I love you, but right now, I can't. I'm so sorry."

"Shhh, it's okay. We understand," Janeway soothed, stroking his hair. She offered up her plump breasts to Volir, who gladly began sucking on them.

"Shhh, just relax, darling," Chakotay said, as he gently stroked his back.

"You've done so well, you've been so brave, we're all very proud of you," Tuvok added, kissing his forehead.

"You've been amazing," B'Elanna praised, holding him close.

"You've done so well, my little prince," Seven cooed, pressing a kiss to his cheek.

"You're so brave, so beautiful, so strong, so perfect," Paris murmured, stroking Volir's back.

The group then beamed to Janeway's quarters, where they took a long bath. They washed Volir's body, taking care not to hurt him, and once he was clean, they got into bed, holding him close.

"I love you all, I love my Masters and Mistresses," Volir murmured, and fell asleep, sucking on B'Elanna's breasts.

"We love you too, Volir, our little slut, our pet, our prince," the seven of them whispered, and kissed him.

"Mine," B'Elanna thought, looking at him, and smiled.

#kathryn janeway #tuvok #star trek #star trek voyager #18+ only #tom paris #harry kim #seven of nine #b'elanna torres #chakotay #ai generated #vulcan #dark fic

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purlturtle · 1 year

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Tagged by @lilolilyr for

Fuck it Friday

The rules: there are no rules. Post whatever you like! Could be nothing. Could be chaos!

Whoa boyyy!! What AM I gonna post?!? Could be anything! Wow!!

Um.

Yeah, so...

Uh...

*drums fingers on table*

Oh! As many of you know, I write fan fic. As some of you know, I *didn't* start with Bering and Wells, but indeed with a huge series of Voyager stories. Starting here if anyone's interested.

I wrote these in winter 2011/2012, and then in summer of 2012, I went to Destination Star Trek 5 Captains in London, because all (then) 5 leads of the Star Trek shows would be there, most notably Sir Patrick Stewart and Kate Mulgrew.

I immediately signed up for photo ops with them, and autographs too. And then I had the fantastic idea to not get a photo autographed but a page from my story - one in which Picard and Janeway interact (and dance!), a scene of which I'm proud to this day.

Here it is:

(SirPatStew is sitting on a barstool, hence the odd difference in height. And I'm leaning down quite a bit for Kate 😅 she tiny me tol (5'4" to 5'10") (Patrick is 5'8") (yes I'm taller than both of them 😂😂🫣😁) )

Anyway, anyone who wants to do this too, please feel tagged!

#tag game

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afraidofchange · 2 years

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[Sensual] Janeway/Shepard

@parallaxedcaptain | Janeway/Shepard - smut meme. ( accepting )

“I never thought these uniforms were... the easiest to strip out of,” Shepard’s breathless response follows as Janeway’s hands undo each clasp holding her red and black uniform, sliding the heavy fabric off of broad shoulders, tracing fingertips all down her arms.

“Good thing I’m experienced,” hails the Captain’s answer, leaning up on her toes to press kiss after kiss along prominent collar bones, over the straps of her undershirt. The scent of that whiskey lingers on her breath; it makes her face warm, but Kathryn makes it warmer when she kisses her neck at the conjuncture of neck and shoulder - a sensation enough to make her eyes roll back, rewarded with a low, guttural moan.

The Captain continues her descent; steadfast hands slide down her ribs, her waist, and settle along the line of muscular hips, just at the hem of her regulation pants. Spared not even a moment’s hesitation, Janeway untucks her undershirt, pulling and insisting it to be taken off - obliging, of course, Shepard lifts her arms, stomach shuddering at the rush of cool air against scarred skin; a myriad of barely healed scars, forked in the shape of lighting all down her left side. The Captain spends time tracing her fingers along each divot and valley, as if studying her. At one spot, along the prominent ‘v’ of her lower abdomen, Alice gasps sharply.

“Ticklish,” is all she manages. She sees Janeway grin before moving on, rising to her full height once more in favour of pulling at the elastic of her sports bra.

“Up and over,” she issues her command and her 2nd obliges, tugging at the item and slipping her arms out. With her breasts free, Janeway continues on her path, this time with her mouth, taking each one at a time, tasting, licking and flicking her tongue over hardening nipples. Alice lifts her head back, peering down but one particular slip of teeth forces a gasp. The familiar flush stems from between her breasts, along the hard surface of her sternum, to her delicate throat and finally, to high cheekbones where it settles, making her feel HOT in the face. “Easy, Commander. I’d expect you to keep it together a little longer.”

“Heh, well....” Shepard wets her lips, clearing her throat as Janeway then takes a nipple between her teeth, and the sensation immediately goes right to her cunt, and standing upright becomes that much more difficult. “I’m doing my best, Captain. Please. Continue.”

Alice can feel Kathryn grin against her chest, but she doesn’t linger much longer, favouring the option to undo the single button of her trousers, letting them fall from her long, long legs to the ground in a heap. What she doesn’t expect, is the Captain to go with them, assaulting her with kisses just above the knee, hands massaging her muscular calves, and then, for the older woman to look up at her - stormy blues bright and eager in the dimmed lighting of the Captain’s quarters. Manicured nails just lift the bottom hems of her briefs.

“Off they come.”

“Yes, ma’am.”

#parallaxedcaptain #oceansinmychest #r: shepard x janeway #ALICE JOAN SHEPARD: IC #v: VOYAGER #[ i hope u like my little easter egg there but thank u for this food ]

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sharpnothashtag · 2 years

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The Good Ship CrushWay, Chapter 55

Data is in a completely white space as a human. He looks confused.

Data: Hello? Q: (appearing in a flash in his judge makeup from Encounter at Farpoint) My friend, Data! (goes in for a hug) Data: (still confused, but accepts the hug) Q, it's good to see you. Q: Your father asked for me to give you this gift. Data: Dr. Soong? Q: Yes. He came and asked if I could make you human. I decided I would. Data: Noonien Soon is dead. How did you communicate with him? Q: Data. You're human, not an idiot. Think. Data: I guess this would be you trying to remind me of your omnipotence? Q: Now you've got it! Data: Q, I'm not sure how to tell you this. I don't really want to be human. How do my father's wishes from beyond the grave overrule mine? Q: Data, you've always wanted to be human! Data: I suppose that for a long time, I did. Q: What changed? Data: (smiling, blushing) Daneel. Q: That little delinquent made you change your dreams? Data: They didn't MAKE me do anything. They love me for who I am. Well, was. Q: And who you were was a collection of programs and algorithms. You were sentient, but that was it--you didn't have a soul. No emotions; no passions; no wishes; no opinions. Data: I had opinions. I had wishes. I think I had a soul. I don't want to lose everything to gain this dream. Q: Your soul was a Schrodinger's Cat and you know it. Data: (pausing) You pose an interesting point. Q: Don't you want to see what your life would be like as a human? Data: I am curious.

Q smiles widely and snaps. A world of beautiful colors appears--a hillside garden. Data reacts emotionally.

Q: What do you feel, my friend? Data: Wonder. Awe. Joy! Is this what I've been missing? Q: Yes! Data: The heat of the sun on my face--I like this. (looking around--he sees a sunflower) The simplicity of its beauty. I know now...why Van Gogh painted them. (he touches the petals, rubbing them between his fingers) They're so soft! Q: And the bloom is almost as tall as you! Data: THIS is joy. Q: Just you wait. (Q smiles wider and snaps. 5 Pitbull puppies come running to Data, who gets down in the grass to play with and kiss these beautiful babies. Q grabs one and hugs it as it licks the makeup off his face. He doesn't seem to care. He laughs.) What would make you even happier? Data: Daneel. (Q snaps, and Daneel appears, confused and freaked out.) Glasses: What's going on?! Data: Akares! It's me! I'm...human. Glasses: What do you mean? Q: Your boyfriend is organic now--flesh and blood. Data: I like the feeling of the sun on my face. I like sunflowers and how soft their petals are. (He sits and scoops up two armfuls of puppies.) And I like Pitbull puppies! I feel such JOY, Akares! Daneel: Oh, Data! Your joy is contagious. (Daneel grabs a puppy and hugs it close. They lean over and kiss Data.) Q: It does my heart good to see you two lovebirds. Daneel: (smile suddenly fading) The last time we saw you, you killed Captain Janeway to get Patrick to go on a date with you, and you kept him for over a month. The puppies and sunflowers are very nice, but I need to know what the catch is. Q: My dear Daneel. Always thinking ahead. Daneel: You're damn right. Q: Why don't you enjoy the countryside--have some lunch before you waste your time on questioning me. (He snaps and a picnic basket appears. A cornucopia of a feast--no less than 4 different comfort food options, accompanied by a hammock in a nearby tree. Daneel looks at the hammock and cocks their head.) For your nap after lunch! Data: Daneel, I know there are a lot of factors at play here, but he's giving us food and a place to nap and the chance for me to experience it as a human. Please, can we just spend this time together? Daneel: (seeing the purity of Data's desire) Of course. Lunch and a nap can't hurt. Q: (something causes Q to lurch. He resists and attempts to brush it off. Rushing) See? Have fun. I'm going to take care of some things; just call for me if you need me. (He disappears.)

Q transforms. He is now a kite that soars through the air. He is a cloud. A star. Then, he transforms into a moon. Picard appears on this moon looking very confused.

Picard: Merde. Q: Did you think you were rid of me now that there are 2 of you? Picard: What are talking about? Patrick? Is he okay? Q: (appearing in human form) Of course he's okay. He's on the Aiftadaa. Picard: Then why are you here? And why am I here? Q: (shrugging) As much as I'd love to take credit for it, this time it wasn't me. I was just kidding with the "being rid of me" stuff. Picard: (rolling his eyes) Who brought us here? (A nonbinary person of African diaspora appears.) Who are you? Ian: I am Ian. I wanted to talk with you, Q. (Picard blinks at him, not sure what to do. Ian laughs.) Come, Jean-Luc. Join us. (Ian gestures, and a river appears. Q and Picard are both surprised. They cautiously move closer to Ian, who grabs one hand of Q's and one of Picard's and runs with them down to the river. There is an island in the river, and Ian makes their way to it, Picard and Q following.) Ian: Q, I'm glad to see you. Jean-Luc, I'm glad you decided to join us, too. Picard: Not that I'm not delighted to spend time in nature, but I need to know who you are. Ian: I am Ian. Q: Yes, you mentioned that. Picard: Perhaps the better question would be "what are you?" Ian: It would be easiest for you to show you. (They offer to put their hand on Q and Picard's heads.) May I? (Q and Picard are so caught off guard by this gentle being that they nod.)

A flash, much like Q's. Summaries of Q's experience and Picard's life flash before them. Ian is in the flash and in their lives as well. They whisper in Picard's ear when he's thinking. They conduct Q as a director, and Q's court adjourns mercifully. They weaken the walls between realities for Patrick to come along. They bring air back into Kathryn's lungs. They keep Bev from killing herself. They kiss Wesley goodnight. They hug Daneel and Data (as a human) tightly. All three come back to the island with a start. Picard shakes his head in wonder.

Picard: Ian...I am afraid I still don't understand. Q: Me neither. Ian: I am the one who keeps you safe. I convince you to do the right things. I am you. I am everything. Picard: God? Ian: I have been called that, although I don't really like the impersonality of it. You are a part of me--I am not outside of you. I also don't like that people used that title to justify all sorts of atrocities, especially in your Earth's history. So I chose Ian. It's more personable. Q: Wait. Wait. Ian. Ian: Yes, Q. Now your eyes are open. Q: I thought you were just a story. Ian: Some stories are true. Picard: Adam and Eve? Ian: Of course not. Picard: Jesus? Ian: He existed and is my son, yes. But that isn't what I'm here for, Jean-Luc. Picard: Then why are you here? What do the stories say? Q: Mon capitane, do you remember figuring out that I am immortal? Picard: Vividly. Q: That may not have been entirely accurate. Picard: What do you mean? Q: Q children are told very young that there is a power greater than themselves. They must be careful, or... Picard: or WHAT? Ian: they would be visited by a ghost. Picard: ...a ghost? Ian: Of course, it loses a little something in translation. Q: It never used to scare me. I just thought it was like your "Christmas Carol", a way to tell us to not be terrible. Ian: And that's not it, either. I'm not a ghost. I'm not here to tell you to shape up. Q: Then why do you frighten me to my very core? (Picard, noticing that Q is panicking, also begins to panic.) Ian: Because I'm here to show you how much I love you. Jean-Luc, you're panicking! Here, let me help. (Ian places their hand on Picard's chest. A blue light glows for a moment, and Picard's heart begins to beat normally again.) Picard: (breathless) Thank you. Ian: Q, I need to show you something. Jean-Luc, it makes sense for you to join us. Q: Show me. (Ian smiles.)

Data and Daneel are asleep in a hammock with two beautiful pitbull puppies. Picard, Ian, and Q appear. They sit.

Q: I just came from here. Ian: Yes, you did. Picard: Data is human? Ian: Just wait. Q, why did you make Data human? Q: I've known he wanted to be one for years. He'd finally found someone he loved--I wanted to give him the opportunity to grow old with Daneel. To have an end in sight. Picard: (crawls over to him) An end? (Q nods and begins to cry.) What about Patrick? Ian: (comforting) I know you love Patrick. This feeling is Q: Strange. Scary. Ian: understandable. Q: (scoffs) Right. Picard: You know Patrick's story, Q. If anyone would understand, it would be him. Q: And you? Do you understand, mon capitaine? Picard: Maybe. No. I don't know. Ian: Jean-Luc, there's something you should know. (Picard turns his attention to them.) Your father felt this way, too. Picard: No, he was sick. Ian: Yes, he was. Picard: He died because he was sick. Ian: Yes, he did. That doesn't mean he didn't feel this way. Picard: My father was suicidal? Ian: Everyone gets that way sometimes, Jean-Luc. Like I said, it's understandable. Picard: How many others? Ian: Why do you think Kathryn always volunteers to take a hostage's place? Why does Beverly constantly read and re-read Frankenstein? Why did Will Riker shave his face with a straight razor? Why does Patrick demand not to be called Locutus? Picard: Will told me he liked the feel of it. Ian: The feel of a very sharp utensil near his neck? Picard: Q, I understand. I'm here. (crawls back over to Q and holds him) Ian: I am here, too, Q. Always.

Data and Daneel wake up; they talk for a minute. They see Q sitting alone in the grass and head to him.

Data: (sitting) There's something wrong, isn't there? Q: Sort of. But I'm better now. What do you think of human life, Data? Daneel: What you have given is a beautiful gift. I got to eat and laugh and nap with someone I love. Data: I am thankful for this time with Daneel, and I will treasure it forever. Q: But you want to go back to being an android? Data: Yes, I do. Daneel: I fell in love with him as an android. I'll stay in love with him as an android. Please, Q. Please put us back where we need to be. (Q smiles and snaps. O'Brien is looking down at Data, and Bev is looking at Daneel.)

Glasses: (trying to sit up, immediately realizing that's a bad idea) What happened? Miles: We took Data into the radial bubble, and when you let go of Data's hand, you fainted. Bev: I put you on a bed and had you monitored until we finished with Data. Glasses: Data. Data?! Bev: Rest easy, Daneel. He's doing just fine. Data: (coming into view) I am here, Akares. (he holds Daneel's hands.) Daneel: Did you rest well? Data: (smiling) Yes--as I remember, you did, too.

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hypnobyl · 3 years

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Hi friend!!! ❤️ if you’re willing, some J7 during The Void when Janeway is isolating herself from the crew?

Isolation was something that Seven could define perfectly and in several languages. She could list famous works from hundreds of species that dealt with being alone, and she could parrot off a laundry list of potential negativity side effects of social withdrawal. But knowing was hardly experiencing, and she’d spent the majority of her life with millions of other minds conjoined with hers, so when Captain Janeway withdrew from the crew and duty, Seven found herself at an impasse.

There was so much about being human that she simply could not fathom, and now one of those things had taken her support away from her. The Doctor warned her that she was being selfish, seeing only her own loss rather than the captain’s pain, but this was confusing. The Borg focused on self-perpetuation, and humans were supposed to, by their very nature, care about individual needs. Was she not simply being human by addressing the matter in this fashion?

Tom laughed when she argued with Chakotay on the bridge and pulled her aside before the second-in-command could dole out any form of rebuke for public insubordination. Like the Doctor, he talked about the captain’s emotional response to the lack of stimulus that the Void represented—although he insisted on using more imprecise language like “She’s not feeling great right now” and “It’s a lot of dark space out there, and maybe she feels like she’s got a lot of dark space in here, too.” He used so many words to say nothing, and she only sat through his attempt at an explanation for a few minutes.

When Tuvok halted her exit to tell her that humans often appear to lack sufficient emotional control, she couldn’t help but release some frustration. He listened patiently while she expounded at length before remarking that she might be dealing with the symptoms of isolation as well.

This stopped her tirade.

She hadn’t considered her own response to being alone. Regardless of where the ship was in space, she’d always had Janeway nearby, so it seemed the Void had found a way to isolate them both. The obvious response, then, was to relieve the source of her anxiety, which led her to the captain’s quarters. She awaited permission to enter for only so long before meddling in the system and forcing her way inside.

“Captain, I require your assistance.”

Janeway sat on the couch in casual garb, an open book on her lap. Her attention was out the viewport, at least until Seven entered the space and drew her gaze. A finger slipped down the open book, marking her place as she closed the cover and leaned forward.

“I don’t recall saying you could come in.”

“I have been informed that humans require sufficient social interaction for mental and emotional well-being.”

Janeway set the book on the low coffee table before her. “That’s no reason for you to break into my quarters. I’m fine—”

“I am not here on your behalf. I am here because I am selfish.” Seven stepped closer and glanced at the book’s title. The Wild Greens, a book of early 23rd century poetry of Terran origin. “I am here to tend to my own needs.”

“I see.” Janeway’s tone remained nonplussed, although she seemed less inclined to shoo Seven away now.

“I have come to rely on you,” Seven said evenly.

“Have you?”

“I would not have spoken otherwise.”

Janeway’s brow crept up her forehead. “I’m certain someone else would have been available to—”

“Everyone else on board is available, yes, which has led me therefore to the conclusion that it is your absence that affects me in this way. I am irritable—”

“Aren’t you always?” A familiar, warm humor finally entered Janeway’s voice. She even allowed a small smile.

“I have noted substantial changes in overall mood, as well as lower chemical levels within my system. These symptoms started shortly after you abdicated your post.”

“That’s a strong way of saying I needed a bit of time for myself.”

“I am not here to argue about semantics.” Seven gingerly sat on the couch beside Janeway. “Please, allow me to fill my quota for social interaction.”

#short fic #j7 #st:v #imaginethat57

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sobriquett · 3 years

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Dear Trick or Treat Author

Dear Trick or Treat Author,

[WIP: 23:50 BST 19/09/21]

What a wonderful time of year! (Or is that Yuletime? Nearly there too!)

Hello! I am very easily pleased so please take this as a starting point if you need some ideas but otherwise write what makes you happy! I know horror tropes/genre are in my dislikes but if you want to write a scary trick, you do that, yes please! Just play within the canonical world (werewolves in Milton-Northern, vampires at Thornfield, ghosts at the White House) and I'll be a happy reader (but please still stay aware from my gore-related DNWs!).

My normal ramble about what I enjoy in fic isn't really relevant to a 300+ word exchange but you can find it in past letters, click the letter tag.

That said, things missing from my main signup include these:

Loves: exploration of power imbalances Likes: epistolary

My fandoms are in alphabetical order (ish), so here we go!

1. 16th Century CE RPF

Anne Boleyn Anne of Cleves Catherine of Aragon Catherine Parr Elizabeth I of England Henry VIII of England Margaret Pole Countess of Salisbury Robert Dudley 1st Earl of Leicester Thomas Seymour (1508 – 1549)

I've been on a bit of a Philippa Gregory kick this summer reading the Cousins' War series out of order. I'd love more stories about these figures – with some of them (Henry VIII in particular!) it's pretty easy to lean into the trick side of things, but there's treat potential too. Add more characters if you want; I've been reading histories and historical novels on this period for many, many years so if you drop in Maria de Salinas or Stephen Fisher or Kat Ashley or Thomas Cromwell or anyone I'm up for that, but I am also a laidback reader and this is a low-stress exchange, don't tie yourself in knots over accuracy. (Although I would, and I'd definitely recommend Ruth Goodman's How to be a Tudor if you haven't read it, even if you're not normally a non-fiction reader.)

What if [any utterly disastrous thing] didn't happen, or perhaps was somehow worse? Did Elizabeth and Dudley actually have some happiness in a romance, however brief? How did Anne of Cleves feel to retire as the King's beloved sister? What was Margaret Pole thinking on the morning of her execution? Is Henry VIII haunted by the ghosts of some of those he killed: friends and lovers and family? Did anything actually happen between Elizabeth I and Thomas Seymour (There's historical room for a secret pregnancy in the country…)

2. Downton Abbey

Mary Crawley Edith Crawley Sybil Crawley Matthew Crawley Tom Branson Robert Crawley Cora Crawley Violet Crawley Isobel Crawley Lavinia Swire Anna Bates Evelyn Napier Freda Dudley Ward Marigold Crawley George Crawley Ship: Tom Branson/Sybil Crawley

This is like my TV comfort blanket. I rewatched it this year and I am interested in just about every main character except, oddly, Thomas – who is the favourite fic character of most writers! Give me a missing moment, a look at the future, a glance at the past, a look from the outside – whatever. Any point in, before or after canon is cool with me, except I tend to skim a lot of S4 (ugh, that rape storyline, please don’t use that).

Do ghosts walk the halls of Downton Abbey? What is life like in Ireland for Tom and Sybil? Do any of the characters ever feel a moment of true despair? What if Matthew had died in the war? What does the future hold for these characters? How did Robert, Cora and Violet get on in the 1890s? What was Carson like with Mary/Edith/Sybil as children? Does it parallel his relationship with their children?

3. The Good Place

Eleanor Shellstrop Chidi Anagonye Tahani Al-Jamil Jason Mendoza Michael Janet

This is another show I can watch over and over and over. I think Chidi's my favourite but it's hard to be sure. I can tell you I absolutely sobbed during the S3 finale and I was a wreck for the S4 finale. Tug my heartstrings, make me laugh, make me cry, I don't care! I've studied philosophy and despised it so I'll take or leave what you include on that score, I just love the characters. Please include any or all other characters you'd like, but I definitely ship Eleanor/Chidi over Chidi/Simone! Although I'll take angst in that direction too! I don't know, I feel like a kid in a candy store writing this letter: hyper and having trouble deciding between all the possible wonders!

Existential dread? Moments from their human lives? Moments from the good place? Please tell me more about the time knife. Does Michael return to the good place when he dies? Does he reunite with Janet and/or Tahani?

4. Jane Eyre

Jane Eyre Edward Rochester Adele Varens Ship: Jane Eyre/Edward Rochester

This is my favourite classic novel, I reread it every couple of years, most recently in 2020 for Yuletide. My reading of it changes each time, and I increasingly believe that Rochester is more bad guy than good guy and that Jane Eyre lies as a narrator and is as prejudiced and superior as those she crititcises for the same qualities. But I still love her, and that she says she got a happy ending.

Is Rochester more of a villain? How? How does Adele find school, either the one Rochester sends her to, or the one Jane moves her to? Post-canon happiness? Post-canon unhappiness? A scene from the engagement? A missing moment between the non-wedding and Jane running away? What if the wedding wasn't interrupted? (Full disclosure: I'm writing this too.) Canon divergence for, well, anything? Is Adele separated from Sophie? How does that go, how does she manage?

5. Memoirs of a Geisha

Nitta Sayuri Mameha Nobu Toshikazu Ship: Nitta Sayuri/Nobu Toshikazu Ship: Mameha/Matsunaga Tsuneyoshi | The Baron

6. North and South

Margaret Hale John Thornton Hannah Thornton Bessy Higgins Ship: Margaret Hale/John Thornton

7. Stardew Valley

Female Player Sebastian Shane Harvey Robin Elliott Leah Marlon Ship: Shane/Female Player Ship: Sebastian/Female Player Ship: Lewis/Marnie

Do Sebastian and the farmer go on any more bike rides? How did Lewis and Marnie’s relationship start? Are they ever found out? Why does Lewis want to keep it secret? Why is he such an arsehole to Marnie? Tales of the purple shorts. Tell me more about Harvey’s nerdy hobbies or fear of heights? What happened with Robin and Sebastian’s dad? The horrors of the mines, or the skull cavern? Is Leah frightened by the things that go bump in the night near her home? Is Elliott? Some angst or h/c around a wounded farmer, being found/nursed? Or how about some angst/horror in which... they’re not? Fics about the war with the Gotoro Empire?

8. Star Trek: Voyager

Kathryn Janeway Chakotay Tuvok Kes Seven of Nine Naomi Wildman

I’ve been a J/C shipper since before I knew shipping was a thing (as a kid, I had all the two-parters, S5&6, and Resolutions on video. Pre-internet, how did I even know which episode Resolutions one? Shippy magic instinct, I guess?) So apart from that ship, or canonical relationships, I would prefer genfic please. I also don’t mind the other Voyager characters so they’re welcome to make an appearance, but these are the ones that interest me.

9. The West Wing

CJ Cregg Josh Lyman Sam Seaborn Abbey Bartlet Charlie Young Donna Moss Jed Bartlet Leo McGarry Toby Ziegler Zoey Bartlet

Happy writing!

Sobriquett

#dear author letter #16th century rpf #downton abbey #the good place #jane eyre #memoirs of a geisha #north and south #stardew valley #star trek voyager #the west wing #trick or treat exchange

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reedalert · 4 years

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Home is here

Prompt: Could you write a fluffy fic where y/n is like s daughter to both Janeway and the Doctor? She is an Ensign and admires both of them. The crew tease her about it endlessly. Also she' s a fellow coffee addict like Janeway.

Requested by: anon

Word count: 750

Pairing(s): Janeway x reader (platonic), The Doctor x reader (platonic)

Notes and Warnings: mentions of a panic attack

You had grown accustomed to being lost in the Delta Quadrant. After 3 years, it was natural for you to wake up and not have your mother wait for you with fresh breakfast on the table and not seeing your father looking through the daily news on a PADD. At times, however, the feeling of being homesick, lonely and hopeless took you over. This happened especially on special days: a birthday, anniversary, celebration.

Today was one of those days. You jolted up in bed, a nightmare refusing to haunt you. You managed to turn the light on before starting to suffer from a severe panic attack: tears were rolling down your face as you were struggling to breathe, everything seeming too distant to reach. You tapped your combadge:

“ Y/L/N to sickbay. I….. need… help.”

The Doctor sent someone after you, you couldn’t remember who it was. When you woke up, you found yourself on a biobed in sickbay, the Doctor hovering over you gently.

“Good morning, Ensign. I trust you slept well after my intervention.”

“Good morning, Doc. Yes, I feel fine now, thank you.”

The hologram smiled. He examined a few readings and set down his tricorder next to you as you sat up. Then, he turned to you, with a bit more of a concerned look on his face.

“I’m worried about you, Y/N. I’ve noticed that you’re getting panic attacks more frequently and they are more intense, too. As ship’s physician, I need to know if there’s something going on.”

“I… I guess it’s just been a bit overwhelming. I’ve been thinking about home a lot.” You started to tear up.

“Oh, dear. You know, if you need anything, I’m always here for you.”

You couldn’t help but lean in and hug the Doctor. He was a bit taken aback at first, but he quickly embraced you as you were clinging onto him for dear life. You were always fascinated by him and certainly thankful that he was always the first one to help, even though he knew nothing about what you could be feeling, really. He just took you under his protection, like a father would, ever since you first met him.

You were still recovering from your stressful night. Ensign Swinn invited you to have lunch with her, she wanted to distract you somehow.

“So, you spent another night at your favorite Starfleet dad’s place again, hmm?”

“What do you mean?” you giggled.

“Oh, it’s no secret, you look up to him. Everyone on the ship knows he’s basically like your father at this point.” She poked your shoulder.

“Yeah, well I needed to comfort myself some way or another. He was very accepting from the start and I guess I just needed a bit of guidance.”

You looked at the time and realized you had to get going.

“Where are you headed?” your friend asked.

“I have a meeting with Captain Janeway. I don’t want to be late.”

“Ah, so now you’re visiting your mom. It’s a family reunion!” She laughed and waved you goodbye.

“Come in.” The Captain said.

You walked in hands behind your back, feeling a mixture of anxiety and happiness.

“Hello, Ensign.” She smiled warmly.

“Captain.” You nodded your hair.

“At ease, Y/N/L. This is casual, candid conversation.”

You let go of your stiffness.

“Come on, sit down. Can I get you something?” Janeway offered.

“Coffee, black, please.”

“Ah, a person after my own heart.” She winked at you as the replicator whirred. “Here you go.”

“Thank you, Captain.” You immediately felt reassured.

“So, Y/N, what’s been on your mind?”

“I’ve been struggling again… Captain, I promise I’m not weak, I am a Starfleet officer, I…”

“Hey, it’s okay, everything is fine! Everyone has a bad day, a bad week, a bad month, Ensign. That doesn’t mean they are weak. We’re in a very tough situation, nobody expects you to be in top form all the time. Just tell me what’s going on so I can help you.”

“I’ve just been really homesick… it’s my mother’s birthday today, so I’ve been thinking a lot about her.”

“Oh, you poor thing.” She embraced you and you put your head on her shoulder.

You spent a solid hour talking to each other. At the end of the day, you went to bed, calm and content, knowing this time your sleep won’t be disturbed by your painful thoughts. One thing was certain: you finally realized you had a family and home on Voyager.

#star trek imagine #star trek voyager imagine #the doctor x reader #kathryn janeway x reader

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angsty-violet · 4 years

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Agony - Chapter 25

Agony Masterpost

@whumptober2020

Tuvok woke from his short nap with his ears ringing. He wasn’t sure what was causing it, but he was concerned. He had taken several blows to the head in his time here. He was at risk for there being permanent damage if he slept with a concussion. He pried his eyes open and looked around. There wasn’t anything noticeably different about his cell.

No chemicals were coming under the door. He had no recollection of a head wound in the past few hours that could cause the ringing. Although Tuvok had field medic training, he wasn’t qualified to diagnose what was causing it. Until he could get some real medical attention, he would just have to put up with it.

Tuvok stood to try and get a little exercise. He could tell his body was wasting away without the physical activity to keep it fit. It wasn’t a pleasant experience. He was trying to get as much movement in as possible between days. His resurgence in the will to live was demanding that he not be a complete invalid when he got out.

However, when he stood up, he immediately became incredibly dizzy. Black spots appeared in his eyes, and the world spun around him. He used the wall to steady himself and waited for it to abate. It did, but not before the ringing in his ears increased in volume. He swayed dangerously and finally slumped against the wall. He leaned against it until he was sitting on the ground. His ears still ringing, but the spots had been replaced. Instead of black, they appeared as colored arcs and circles.

He blinked his eyes to try and clear them, but they stayed where they were. Tuvok knew that he was in the beginning stage of a migraine—the aura phase. Tuvok’s migraines completely debilitated him. He would be incapable of taking any steps towards escape during it.

Janeway watched as the planet came into view. She raised an eyebrow at the sight of it. They still didn’t have very much information on what was happening there. They knew that a madman was holding Tuvok and torturing him. They even knew roughly where the building was. However, they had no idea if this was happening with the government’s knowledge.

“Hail the planet. Let’s see if they are in on this.”

“We have a response.”

“Onscreen.

An alien appeared on the screen. He was reptilian with green scales.

“We are the Groanl. How may we help you, travelers?”

“We’re searching for our crewmember that we think might have been brought here. He’s been missing for several weeks.”

The alien looked surprised. “What makes you think he was here? We don’t get many alien ships through here.”

“We believe that one of your kind abducted him. He sent a message buoy from your planet a few weeks ago. That’s what set us on your course. We also encountered another who said that they were also abducted by the same man.”

The alien took on an alarmed look. “You must wait for one moment. If it is who we believe it to be, we will help you retrieve your crewmember with the knowledge that his captor will be sent to us for punishing.”

Captain Janeway inclined her head. “We have no intention to get between him and your justice system. We are only after our crewmember. As soon as he, or his body, are recovered, we will leave the rest up to you.”

The alien nodded quickly. “I will be back momentarily. We must move quickly. Every moment your crewmember remains, there is another moment that his life is in danger.”

Once they had spoken to the supervisor, they had beamed down and made their way to the equivalent of a police station on the Groanl’s planet. They were led into a room that held numerous maps, charts, technology, and a lot of people. They were brought to the desk of an alien who looked up sharply when he saw them.

“My name is Selvent. Please, step into our conference room. I want to have this conversation in private.”

They followed him into a small room where he shut the door behind them. Then he scrubbed a hand over his face and looked at Janeway and the crew she had brought with her.

“You said that your crewmember was taken a few weeks ago. He looks like you?”

Captain Janeway felt a bolt of worry shoot through her. Had they found a body, and they needed an identification? She slowly nodded.

“Yes, the only external difference is his pointed ears. He’s got dark skin and brown eyes.”

Selvent looked relieved. “We haven’t found his body yet, which means there is a good chance he’s still alive. We’ve been pursuing Dr. Kell’an for almost a year. He has continued to elude us and take victims. It would go faster if we had a location to search for him and his partner, but we haven’t gotten anything yet.”

“We might be able to help you with that. We ran into another one of his victims a few days ago; they were on their way back to their home planet. They passed along the approximate location of the building Tuvok is being kept in. As long as he hasn’t been moved since then, we should be able to find them.”

Selvent looked hopeful. “If we could take this sadist down, we could keep him from hurting anyone else. If your crewmember has been there for as long as you say and survived, he must be absolutely incredible. I hate to tell you this, but the bodies we discovered have all shown signs of severe torture. It looks like they were tortured to a certain point and then murdered. You need to prepare yourself for what happens if you get him back. It’s not going to be pretty.”

“We are well aware of the possibilities. The crew has already taken the initiative to come up with ways to help him once we have him back.”

Selvent nodded in approval. “If he could survive that monster, then I gave no doubt that he can recover with your help. It might take some time, but anyone that strong is a true survivor.”

Janeway felt a tendril of hope within her, and for the first time since Tuvok disappeared, she didn’t squash it. Maybe she could afford a little hope, especially since they were so close to having him back. Although she didn’t know how awful it would be if they didn’t manage to rescue him. She didn’t even want to contemplate that thought.

#whumptober #no.25 #ringing ears #star trek voyager #fic #hurt tuvok #torture #protective crew #pain #evil captors #evil original characters

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imagine-writing-rainbow · 5 years

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Tom Paris x Reader

It was the lack of danger that unsettled you the most. The total and utter absence of anything living. There were trees, with fiery red leaves, that climbed, never-ending, into the sky. Dark green grass as far as your eye could see. Yellow and White flowers with plate-sized petals and fat stems swaying in the wind. But nothing, Alive. Not that plants weren't alive, but simply a different kind of alive than you and your partner.

The only intelligent life around was you and Tom Paris.

If you weren't stranded in the middle of nowhere, with a busted tricorder, and minimal rations, You might consider this a vacation.

For the approximately 2 days you had spent here; the planet had warm days and cool nights, nothing severe. On this particular cool night, you lay awake, watching the stars twinkle in the indigo sky. On earth, nature has a sound: crickets chirping, owls hooting, bushes rustling with nocturnal wildlife. Here, you're humming because the silence is deafening, all-consuming.

"Can't Sleep?" Tom asks, his voice husky with sleep.

Unlike you Tom had no problem sleeping when it was sickeningly quiet.

"Yeah" you wonder if you're humming woke him up, you weren't being terribly loud, but you were the loudest sound in the silent night. "I can't sleep when it's quiet. I find it unsettling. Sorry if I woke you."

"You didn't wake me up, I had a nightmare" He sounds sarcastic, but his face holds no humor. He seems flat.

"Oh, do you wanna talk about it?"

"No" is his reply and you know immediately that no amount of coaxing was gonna help. He wouldn't tell you about his nightmare and you would have to live with that. Yet, you still wanted to help get his mind off of whatever had spooked him.

"What about your best prank then?"

"What makes you think I was a prankster?" He says, and you can hear his smile.

"Please Paris, you have class clown written all over you"

"Okay," He says, "there was this one time…"

You and Tom trade stories. You tell him about the time you greased yourself in olive oil so you're mom couldn't put you to bed and he tells you about the time he hijacked his Early Starfleet History Teacher's Presentation to talk about 21st century memes.

"And by the end of it, even the teacher was in on it" He laughs.

"I mean," you laugh, "how does a single egg get so popular"

After you run out of witty anecdotes that don't err on the side of too personal, too deep for the bubbly moment. Everything is silent again. And even though Tom seems to have left that nightmare in the past, you still can't sleep when it's silent.

You start humming again, a soft lullaby that your mother used to hum to you.

"Come over here," Tom says.

You glance over at him skeptically.

"Just get over here"

You crawl over to him, stopping beside him.

"Lay with me" he says.

You can think of a million reasons to say no, to crawl back over to your spot and hum until you're exhausted. But, by god, did you want to say yes.

You snuggle against him, resting your head against his chest. His heartbeat is steady. The calm, comforting rhythm of life. You continue to hum, lulling yourself and Tom to sleep.

***

Early the next morning, a landing party beams down onto your quiet planet. They go looking for you and Tom. Fortunately you both are easy to find. Unfortunately, you are wrapped around Tom like a blanket.

Neelix's chants of "I knew it. I knew it" wake both of you up. And you both scramble, ungracefully, to untangle yourselves. A blush dusts Tom cheeks and your own embarrassment has you awkwardly avoiding the amused looks of the landing party.

***

After your medical checkup, Captain Janeway orders you to take a day of leave. With nothing to do, You head to your quarters.

Someone knocks on your door. You wonder who it could be, maybe a friend come to check up on you?

You open the door. "Tom?" you say startled; You weren't expecting him. I mean part of you was hoping to talk to him, but you didn't expect him to show up at your door.

"You are the most dense person I have ever met and for some reason I like that" He says.

"You- What?"

He leans in and presses a kiss to your lips.

"Oh."

"I guess I like you too"

"You guess?"

"Don't push your luck Paris." You say, with a smile on your lips.

#Tom Paris x Reader #star trek imagine #star trek: voyager #star trek #star trek x reader #star trek reader insert #reader insert #x reader #gender neutral reader insert #gender neutral reader #gender neutral #imagine #reaction #Star Trek Reaction #Star Trek: Voyager Imagine

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rosalie-starfall · 2 years

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Star Trek: Voyager - Capt. Kathryn Janeway

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summahsunlight · 4 years

Text

This Way Became My Journey, CH.11

Word Count: 3192

Pairings: Janeway/Chakotay, Paris/OFC

Characters: Kathryn Janeway, Chakotay, Tom Paris, Sarah Barrett (OC), Harry Kim, B’Elanna Torres, Kes, Neelix, the Doctor

A/N: Here is the next chapter! I hope you like it :)

One week after Voyager is taken from the Alpha Quadrant...

It wasn't even eight in the morning yet and Lieutenant Joe Carey already found himself with a bloody nose in sickbay. It wasn't exactly the way he had pictured his day starting. Already their new first officer was glaring at him hotly. "She's out of her mind!" Carey shouted attempting to sit up. The holographic doctor shoved him back down onto the biobed which caused the man to scream in pain.

Tuvok looked at the man with the same calm and emotionless demeanor that he held with everybody. "You will explain what happened, Mister Carey," Tuvok ordered as the doors to sickbay opened and Sarah Barrett made her way across the cabin towards the group.

Carey did not look pleased to see her there. "What I get hit in the nose and I'm the one who needs the shrink?"

"Lieutenant Barrett is here by my request," Chakotay said. "Maybe with her help we can figure out a way for you all to get along down there."

"Your nose is broken in three places," the Doctor informed the fuming Carey. "Try not to move while I fix it." He walked away but immediately Carey was sitting up again.

Sarah stepped closer to the biobed. "Why did she hit you Lietuenant?"

He sighed, angrily. "We were having a disagreement about the power grid. She wanted to realign the lateral plasma conduit. I told her that would cause an overload," He answered her, wiping the blood a way from his nose with a cloth. "As usual she wouldn't listen. So I told her to step aside and let me handle it. She pushed me a way from the console…and I pushed her back," he became defensive when he saw the accusing look in Barrett's blue eyes. "The next thing I knew I was on the deck with blood pouring down my face!"

She should have hit you harder, Barrett thought.

"Then what happened?" she heard Chakotay ask.

He scoffed. "She said sorry, maybe you should go to sickbay."

The Doctor had returned with his tools to fix the broken nose and forced Carey to lay back down again. "At least she gave you some good advice." Barrett rolled her eyes to the notice of no one while Carey gasped out in pain at being forced back down onto the bed. "Now," the Doctor ordered, "hold still."

Chakotay made eye contact with Tuvok and turned to go. "Don't worry," he assured the Vulcan. "I'll handle this."

Barrett glanced behind her to see the other two men leaving. As she sprinted after them she heard Carey scream, "You keep that woman out my engines and everything will be fine!"

She wasn't so sure she felt comfortable with Chakotay handling this. "Commander," she called, forcing Chakotay and Tuvok to halt their progress. "What did you mean when you said you would handle this?" she asked him, folding her arms across her chest. "B'Elanna has commited a serious offense in Starfleet protocol. Are you up to date on the proper punishment for this?"

Chakotay glared at her. He knew she was only trying to help but her getting involved everything was beginning to wear on his nerves. "She isn't Starfleet, she's Maquis."

"When you agreed to join forces with us, I was under the impression that you were joining us as a Starfleet crew," she mocked him. "Torres should be thrown in the brig for the remainder of the trip for hitting a fellow officer, a senior officer at that."

"Carey is not Chief Engineer," Chakotay pointed out to her.

"He is the most qualified person down there right now to act as a senior officer," she snapped back.

"Counselor Barrett is correct sir," Tuvok intervened. "Miss Torres would be court martial for this offense if we were in Federation space."

Chakotay felt his temper rising. "But we're not in Federation space, and even if we were, my people wouldn't be on this ship."

"You have to stop thinking of them as your people, Commander," Barrett retorted, hotly. "Or the Starfleet members of this crew are going to think you're playing favorites." She put her hands on her hips. "Why did you call me down here anyways if you weren't going to listen to me?"

"To tell you the truth Counselor, I'm sick of listening to you," Chakotay snapped. "Now if the two of you don't mind, I will handle B'Elanna." He turned to go, but Barrett stopped him.

"And the Captain?" she asked, raising an eyebrow.

"I'll tell her when I'm ready," Chakotay said, disappearing into a turbo lift.

Barrett glanced at Tuvok. "This isn't the first complaint that I've received about Torres," she said thoughtfully. "Captain Janeway should know about it."

"Indeed, as chief of security I will be the one to inform her," Tuvok said. "In the meantime, I would like you to pay another visit to Ms. Torres."

The young counselor nodded her head. "Yes sir, I don't know how much good it's going to do though."

Tuvok raised an eyebrow for a moment before responding, "One can only hope for the best."

Kathryn Janeway hurried along the corridor to get to the turbo lift. She was already late reporting to the bridge that morning, thanks to Michael somehow rewiring her door and locking the family in their quarters until Kathryn had been able to fix it, by that time she was more than twenty minutes behind schedule. Ava had then pushed her back another five minutes more because the child refused to get her shoes on.

After an extensive battle with her one year old, Kathryn had just been ready to step out the door when Michael threw a tantrum that the toy he wanted to bring to the ready room with him that morning was missing. She had torn the quarters apart looking for the toy, only to realize ten minutes later that it had been left behind in their apartment in San Francisco. Now that she was almost an hour late, she didn't have the time to completely calm Michael down before she grabbed the bag of things she had packed the night before, and dragged the child out of the quarters, sobbing along the way about some toy that he had perhaps only played with once and Kathryn had thought he had cared less about.

The crew walking the corridors did all they could to move out of her way so she could walk past them. She must have been a sight, carrying a one year old, and a bag slung over her shoulder, dragging a crying five year old behind her. Not the text book picture of a Starfleet captain, that was for sure. However, she was so flustered at that moment, she didn't really care what she looked like and what the crew thought of her.

"That was my favorite toy, Mama," Michael sobbed as they stepped into the turbo lift. "How could you forget it?"

Of course this is my fault, Kathryn thought, biting hard down onto her lip so she wouldn't lose it. "Deck one," she said, not bothering to answer him. She had learned a long time ago that it was better to ignore his tantrums then to indulge him. The lift started moving rapidly to her relief. As the lift came to a stop and the doors swished open, she heard something fall to the floor with a thump. Glancing down she saw her combadge skip out of the lift and into the corridor. Ava was giggling wildly.

Closing her eyes and saying a silent prayer, she stepped out of the lift and towards the spot where Ava had tossed her combadge. Leaning down proved to be difficult but she wasn't going to let a bag and a baby stop her. However, Michael was going to prove to be harder, since he wouldn't release her hand so she could pick the combadge up. She pulled on it several times before turning to look at him, sternly. "Let go of Mama's hand so I can pick up my combadge, Michael."

The little boy shook his head. "I don't wanna."

Kathryn ran her tongue over her lips and decided it was pointless to fight with him in this state. Managing to balance Ava onto her thigh, she wiggled her other hand free and scooped the combadge up. With a feeling of triumph, Kathryn proceeded into her ready room, dropped the bag onto the floor by her desk, plopped Ava down into her desk chair, and used her hand to pry Michael's grasp off her other. The boy wasn't too happy about that and started to cry even louder than before, standing in the middle of the ready room, stomping his feet.

"That will get you nowhere," Kathryn told him, moving towards her replicator. "Coffee black," she ordered, and a metallic cup materialized before her eyes, steaming hot. She took the mug and was about to savor it's bitter taste when she turned around to see Ava crawl up onto her desk, and push her personal computer off of it onto the floor. The computer broke apart.

"Uh-oh," Ava cooed, looking at the broken computer with innocent blue eyes.

The broken computer was the last straw. Kathryn scooped Ava up off the desk, went to place her down on the upper level and turned to Michael, who was sniffling in the middle of the lower level, the broken computer had taken his attention away from the toy that he missed and ceased his sobs. "Do you two think you can play over here quietly while I try to get some work done?" the mother snapped at the two children. "I'm already behind as it is because I spent the whole morning looking for your toy Michael!"

Michael rubbed his nose on his sleeve. "I'm sorry, Mama."

"Now, the bag is over there, it has things to keep you occupied," Kathryn said, gesturing towards the shoulder bag she had left near her desk. "I suggest that you go through it and find something to do while I work."

"Okay."

With a frustrated sigh Kathryn fell into her chair and reached for the stack of PADDs on her desk, not even bothering to pick up the broken computer, it was after all useless to her now.

She heard Michael shuffling about in the bag and satisfied that he was finding something to keep himself busy, she settled into reading the first report in the stack. It was one problem after another it seemed, simple things that could have been dealt with if they had access to a starbase, however, things were not the case in their situation and they were scrambling to find answers. The hardest being the power supply. It had slowly started to decay the other day and if this report was any indication then replicators were going to go off line at some point and who knew how long they could all survive on emergency rations.

The personnel situation wasn't looking too good either. They had lost their chief engineer and chief medical officer, along with the first officer and chief helmsman when they had been flung into the Delta Quadrant by the Caretaker. Even though she had found replacements for first officer and conn, she wasn't sure if she was going to be lucky enough to find as qualified a candidate as Chakotay or Tom Paris. The Maquis just didn't have the discipline and some of the Starfleet officers didn't have the experience.

Not to mention she had her own personal needs. The children needed a childcare provider while she was on duty, them staying in the ready room was already proving to not be working out. She also had to take into consideration that Michael needed schooling, he was after all five years old and would be going into kindergarten, if they were back on Earth, in the fall. But who on this ship really had the time to devote entirely to baby-sitting and teaching her kids? And who would be willing? It wasn't as if their duties entailed baby-sitting their commanding officer's children.

Finished with the first PADD, Kathryn placed it in a separate pile and began on the second one. The door chimed and she placed the PADD back into the stack, calling out, "Come in."

Tuvok strode into the room with the same stoic look upon his face. "Captain, may I have a moment of your time?"

"Certainly Tuvok, what can I do for you?"

"There was an incident down in Engineering this morning," Tuvok reported, not that it was going to be surprising to Kathryn. Engineering had been a disaster since they had started on their journey home, especially since there was not a senior officer down there. "Miss Torres struck Lieutenant Carey, breaking his nose in three places. Commander Chakotay has asked to deal with it, despite what I think. However, I will be making a full note of it in my security log. I also thought it important for you to know."

Kathryn pressed her knuckles to her mouth for a moment, letting the news set in. "Is Counselor Barrett aware of this new development?"

"Commander Chakotay asked that she not be involved in this," Tuvok stated.

The Captain shook her head. "At this point, I really don't care what Commander Chakotay thinks. I understand his wanting to look out for his people, however, Counselor Barrett is the best person to deal with this matter. Have her report to B'Elanna's quarters. I want her to sit down and talk to her."

"Understood Captain," Tuvok said, before leaving the ready room.

The shattering of glass caused Kathryn's head to spin about and look at the upper level of her ready room. Ava was standing on the sofa, looking down on the floor at what had been a vase of flowers. Now it lay in fragments on the floor. Maybe when Sarah's done with B'Elanna, Kathryn thought, she can stop my daughter's sudden fascination with breaking things.

Sarah Barrett pressed the door chime outside of B'Elanna Torres' quarters and waited to be admitted. After several seconds of standing there, nothing happened, so she pressed the button again. And again she was let in. "Computer confirm that B'Elanna Torres is in her quarters."

"That is affirmative."

Sarah frowned, Chakotay must have given her the heads up that I was coming eventually. Typing in her security access code, the doors slid open and she was facing a very seething looking B'Elanna.

"I didn't want you coming in," the Klingon hissed at her. "I guess you can't take a hint."

"Sorry, Captain's orders," Sarah replied, stepping into the room. "Apparently we're supposed to have a little chat about what happened down in Engineering this morning. I've already been to speak with Lieutenant Carey and several others who were in Engineering when the…incident occurred. The only side of the story I haven't heard is yours."

B'Elanna blinked for a moment, staring at the young woman. Chakotay had not wanted to hear her side of the story, lashing out at her that he had made it one lousy day for him. Like it hasn't been lousy for me, she lamented. She didn't mean to lose her temper; she had told Harry Kim that much when they had been on Ocampa, but it happened, and usually she felt remorse later for it happening. However, she couldn't say she felt sorry for Joe Carey. He had been pushing her buttons since the moment she joined the Engineering staff. "My side of the story? Is that a captain's order as well?"

"Not exactly, but if I'm to work out the problems, then I need to know both sides of the story," Sarah responded to her, crossing her arms over her chest. "You can either make this easier for me and for your self, or you can make it difficult by giving me attitude. It's your choice in the end, but I strongly recommend you cooperate."

"What's there to tell, I hit him because he's an idiot," B'Elanna snapped.

"That sounds like a perfectly good reason to hit someone," Sarah snapped back just as sarcastically. "Let me be blunt Miss Torres, we've been down this road several times already and our journey home isn't even a week old yet. Quite frankly I'm getting sick of this trip. It seems that no matter what I say to you, you don't listen to me."

B'Elanna scoffed. "I don't have to listen to some Starfleet brat tell me how to control my temper."

"You're right, you don't have too, but on the flip side, you shouldn't have too," Sarah replied.

"What are you saying?"

"I'm saying that you should have a hold on your temper at this stage in the game," the Counselor shot back. "Hitting a fellow officer is not going to get you brownie points with the Captain."

B'Elanna didn't dare to tell her that she could care less what Captain Janeway thought of her. "So what do you plan on doing with me, Counselor? I hear the Vulcan wants to court martial me."

"I don't want to court martial you, although, if we were home now, this wouldn't even be an issue," Sarah replied. "However if you want to get back to work, I strongly suggest that you try to make amends with Lieutenant Carey. It's a long trip to be holding a grudge against someone and it's also a long trip to be cooped up in here, don't you think?"

Chakotay had told her the same thing, but hearing it coming out of the mouth of the counselor, it suddenly hit B'Elanna that these people weren't kidding her when they said they were going to seriously considering either confining to her quarters or to the brig. Perhaps it was time to start listening to them, because being stuck with Joe Carey breathing down her neck when she knew she was the better engineer, was far better than spending seventy-five years in a cell. "Chakotay wants me to do the same thing, but I don't think either you understand what an incredibly pompous…man Carey can be. It's not going to be easy."

Sarah turned about to leave, glancing over her shoulder, "No, but it's the hard things that we have to go through that make us better people." As she stepped out into the corridor she fully faced B'Elanna, "Maybe Lieutenant Carey will see you in a different light if you swallow your pride and call a truce."

"A truce? Between Starfleet and Maquis?"

A small laced Sarah's face. "Stranger things have happened before."

B'Elanna stared at the door long after Sarah let them room, then setting her jaw she stepped out of her quarters and proceeded to Engineering, perhaps the counselor was right, and apologizing was the right course of action to take, it was, at least worth the shot, even if in the end it didn't have the results that many were hoping, at least she would have the satisfaction of knowing she had at least tried.

#star trek voyager #star trek voyager fanfiction #kathryn janeway #chakotay #janeway x chakotay #tom paris #sarah barrett (oc)#tom paris x ofc #tuvok #harry kim #b'elanna torres #neelix #kes #the doctor (emh)#this way became my journey

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angrywarrior69 · 6 years

Text

Fictober prompt # 19

“Oh please, like this is the worst I have done.”

For @coffee-in-that-nebula

ao3

Chakotay smiled as Kathryn brought over the plate from her replicator.

“This looks delicious,” he said as he picked up his fork.

She seated herself across from him and folded her napkin in her lap.

“It's one of my mother's recipes. She used to make the sauce in a slow cooker.”

This was not his first rodeo, so he subtly eyed the plate for any obvious abnormalities. Everything appeared normal. He twirled up some noodles onto his fork and raised it to his mouth as she watched.

“Hm, it's uhm--” he paused to clear his throat and to find the will power to swallow. “It's very good, thank you.”

The burnt-tasting noodles and chunky, raw sauce tasted worse the more he chewed. It formed a lump in his throat and he swallowed hard, trying not to think about it.

“Bad, huh?” she asked before trying her own forkful and spitting it out into her napkin, taking a big sip of wine immediately after, looking to her first officer apologetically.

“Maybe we should go to the mess hall instead,” she offered.

Chakotay laughed. “I'll never understand why your replicator misbehaves so much.”

He stood as she went to recycle the plates and that's when he felt it. The urgent need to empty his stomach as soon as possible. The thought of going the ten extra steps to his quarters made him shiver so he fast walked into Kathryn's bathroom.

“Why don't you go and I'll meet you there,” he rushed.

He practically ran inside and leaned over the toilet, unable to suppress the loud noises of the food coming back up, and heard Kathryn knocking on the door.

“Chakotay are you alright?”

“Yes, I'm--” he stopped as his stomach churned again, “I'm fine, Kathryn.”

“Oh please, like this is the worst I've done!” she shouted through the door. “I scanned it and the tricorder said it was edible!”

“It was much better than the soup last week,” he tried to reassure her with his head in the toilet.

“Do you need the doctor?”

He couldn't believe he was about to end up in sickbay for the nth time over Kathryn's cooking.

“That might be a good idea,” he managed to get out before another bought of nausea took over.

He heard her hail him through the door.

“Janeway to the doctor.”

~ Yes, captain. ~

“Can you please come to my quarters? The commander is ill.”

~ Captain, please do not tell me you poisoned the commander again. ~

“The tricorder said--” Chakotay heard something slap the wall outside. “Just get here as soon as possible, doctor.”

~Yes, captain. I'll be right there. ~

#wordsofjc #kathryn janeway #chakotay #ficlet #i'm sorry if you expected something sexy #janeway v. replicators

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secretvixen83 · 6 years

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Quieter Souls

Chakotay felt reenergized after his session using the Akuna. Some questions were answered, while other questions were raised. He was right about his necklace, yes he was right about the glow from the stone. Ironically, he realized that the glowing hue was identical to Kathryn’s eyes. Smiling to himself, he silently wished her “good night”. Crawling into bed himself, he stared at the ceiling. It seemed lighter than it should be and he thought it was odd. He dismissed it though, and rolled to his side, and fell asleep.

He was dreaming. He knew he was, but the smell of fire still made him jumpy. He was in the cargo bay, and the computer wasn’t responding to his orders. Had Kathryn lost trust in him? Had she removed his status? He turned and looked around him. Fire everywhere. It wasn’t that he had been removed, but that he was trapped, and systems were malfunctioning to stop the fire. He tried to make it to the wall to manually override the computer. As he moved there was a flash, and a massive white fireball knocked him down. The air knocked out of him, he struggled once more to his feet. He wouldn’t die like this, dream or not. Silently, he called on his spirit guide to help him. He looked around again and noticed the flames had changed. They were completely white. Burning yes, but not moving towards him. They stayed static. Not wanting to tempt fate, he began to quickly move to the wall. In front of him a shape suddenly appeared. It was approximately 5ft in stature, maybe more. Pointed ears like an Ocampa, but lanky like an elf. It was almost like a statue but had been painted. He looked at it but was more anxious to handle the flames. Making his way to the wall finally, he pulled open the panel and began redirecting the circuit power. Just when he was ready to give up, the foam shot from the walls at floor level and extinguished the flames.

As the smoke cleared, the statue remained unharmed. He walked towards it and stopped about a foot away when he heard the voice. “This is not Borg space as she thinks.” It hissed. “Beware star seeker, you shall make friend and foe here.” The voice wasn’t scary, it just caught him off guard. As soon as the voice stopped a huge rush of wind seemed to envelope the room, and the statue shattered, then dissolved. Chakotay was picked up in the wind and thrown.

With a jump, Chakotay woke to find himself on the floor in his quarters. Sweating just as if he had gone back to the Holodeck to work out, his shorts clung to his legs, and the heat from his skin radiated out. Slowly getting up, he took a deep breath. The words replayed in his head “Not Borg space, friend and foe”. Chakotay tried to shake himself of the dream and looked at the clock. 0530. Great time to get ready for work. He ate breakfast quickly and replicated coffee. Not for himself, but for her. It wasn’t much, but he would give anything to see the light back in her eyes. The necklace glowed again. As blue as Kathryn’s eyes. Smiling, Chakotay grabbed the coffee cup from the replicator, and headed out the door.

Kathryn had just passed Chakotay’s door, and he saw her rounding the corner. He carefully trotted to catch up. The light demand on his muscles making them rebel after the workout yesterday. “Kathryn!” He called to her so she would turn. As she did, his heart sped up, and he could feel the stone against his chest cooling rapidly. He could see she hadn’t slept well the night before, and he realized that it bothered him. It never had before. Or was he so dense he had never noticed it? Either way, he was sorry he had never noticed it before now. As he stepped up to her, he took her right hand in his left, and carefully set the coffee cup in her hand. “I thought you might need this before duty.” He said smiling slightly. She looked down at the cup, and back at him. “Thank you.” It was almost a whisper. A weary whisper. He walked with her in silence as she drank, and he realized the stone was colder than usual under his uniform. So cold in fact, it made goosebumps on his skin.

As they made their way onto the bridge, Chakotay felt the shift in her. No personal feelings, only work. Tom caught his eye and gave a questioning look. Chakotay smiled and shook his head, as if to say “It’s nothing.” Kathryn had settled in her chair, still cradling the coffee cup he had given her, and if someone caused her to spill it, Kathryn decided she would probably just eject them into space. She wasn’t showing it, but it touched her deeply that he had used his rations on her. As Kathryn listened to the din surrounding her, she let her mind wander to the place where she kept everything she knew about Audrey’s disappearance. The police seemed to not be willing to help, her mother was crushed, and had blamed herself, Kathryn admitted she just quit feeling after the first 30 days.

Audrey’s father, Shane had been a promising officer at the Academy. Their romance had been a whirlwind. He had turned rogue though and took up a position as a no name Maquis. Kathryn understood the Maquis cause far more than Chakotay would realize. When she found out she was pregnant, she was terrified to tell anyone. Shane found out one night after they had gone dancing, and she fell extremely ill. While being checked out by medical, the truth came to light, and he had asked her; “Is it true Katy? Are you? I mean, are we?” When she had answered in the positive, she was sure he would be enraged. Instead, he swept her up off the bed in his arms and held her tightly. It was the safest she had felt the entire time she had been pregnant. Then came the night when she was seven months 3 weeks along, when the police came to her door with the announcement that Shane was gone. She thought she had lost her soul then but carried on anyway. When Audrey was born, she struggled to find a middle name, and Shane had been adamant that the baby should have a noble, and respectable last name. So, Audrey Shane Janeway was born.

Kathryn jumped as she felt Chakotay’s light touch on her arm. She looked up at him, and knew he saw her tears and pain. Quickly, she blinked them away, as she realized Tuvok had been calling to her concerning an approaching vessel. She went through the motions and could feel Chakotay just over her left shoulder as she stood to listen and speak back to their newly found species. Curious travelers were what they were. No hostility. No war. No fighting. Several times as Chakotay would speak she caught herself looking up and slightly back at him. On purpose, she took half a step back and gently bumped into him. Then as he spoke, she studied his profile. Just looking at this man calmed her. Calmed her, alarmed her, confused her. Running her teeth across her bottom lip, she forced herself to look away from him, and back to the screen. They said their goodbyes to this new species and went on their way. As soon as the screen went back to being just darkness and stars, Kathryn made a subtle break for the Readyroom.

Chakotay watched her go. He wasn’t sure if he should follow. The words from his dream repeated. “This is not Borg space as she thinks.” With that, he handed off command to Tuvok, and followed Kathryn. She was at her desk staring at her computer when he entered. “Captain” he said, and she looked up. Emotionless. That’s how she was looking at him, and it scared him. “I need to talk to you about where we are in the quadrant.” He said, trying to illicit a reaction from her. She blinked and motioned to a chair. “Borg space.” She said as he sat. “We have been through this before.” Her tone was flat, and still emotionless. “I don’t think it’s Borg space we will be entering.” As he said that, there was a flicker in her eyes. Barely. “I am not sure what we will find here, but I doubt it will be Borg.” As he said that, Kathryn’s brow furrowed as she processed what he was saying. “Commander,” She started, as she came around the desk and stood in front of him, leaning her hip on the edge. “What do you base your findings on?” She was curious. Still guarded, still numb, but curious.

He knew how his answer would sound but he had to say it. “A dream after my meditation last night.” He repeated the dream, every part of it. Kathryn listened actively. Again, a flicker, but this time it stayed. When he was done, Kathryn was silent for a minute as she walked to the window. Turning back to face him, she said, “Commander, at this point I say we prepare for Borg—but hope for whatever your dream may mean.” Just then Seven’s voice came over their Combadges. “Captain, Commander, The readings from the probe have returned. There are no Borg in the distances tested.” Seven said in her usual, factual tone. “Very well, Seven, thank you for letting us know. Please ready the probes again to be used in the next couple of days after their data has been loaded into our records.” Chakotay said as he watched Kathryn.

She looked like if she stood still long enough, she would sleep standing up. There was about five feet between them. Kathryn felt as if it could have been a hundred. Chakotay stayed where he was, not wanting to rush or frighten Kathryn. He wanted to hold her. He wanted to smell the intoxicating soap she used, to feel her weight against him. She looked back at him, and then back out the window. He shifted and began to stand. Before he was all the way up she was in front of him. He raised his eyebrows, letting her make the first move. Her gaze said it all. She was tired, hurt, confused, scared, and underneath it all, she trusted him. She reached out her arms to him, and he quickly pulled her to him, kissing her forehead as she let out a sigh. He coaxed her into taking a nap on the couch in her office. Promising her if anything major happened he would wake her. He stayed until she fell asleep. He started to leave, instead he walked to her, kissed her forehead, and sat back down in the chair he had been in, kicked his legs out, leaned back and took a nap along side his Captain. Along side Kathryn.

#wordsofjc #star trek voyager #delta quadrant #kathryn janeway #chakotay #j/c fanfic

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sharpnothashtag · 4 years

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The Good Ship CrushWay, Chapter 30

Author’s Note: I needed some time away from that last story. Call it a mid-season break, if you’ll allow it. Now, for something I’ve wanted to do for literal years. (Yes, the stardate is going to be inaccurate because as much as I want to care about it, I don’t. Two years have passed since chapter 1; six months have passed since chapter 29. That’s all you need to know.)

Seven is walking through the corridors, nodding at doctors who smile at her.

Seven: Personal log, stardate 97770.33. Admiral Paris has called myself, Captain Janeway, B’Elanna Torres, Tom Paris, the Doctor, and a few people I have not yet met to an early morning meeting. It is rather inconvenient timing, as I was beginning to incorporate a new aspect to the filing system that would improve its efficiency. Now, until I am permitted to return to my duties, the system will remain in its current state of disarray.

Seven walks up to a door. She rings the chime.

KJ: Come! Seven: (enters, it’s a conference room. KJ is seated near the head of the table. Seven nods in acknowledgement.) Captain. KJ: Good morning, Seven. Seven: How was your sleep? KJ: Beverly woke me up snoring. (drowning her yawns in coffee. ...) Since when do you care? Seven: The Doctor and I have been talking about little talk. It seems an inefficient way of communication, but the Doctor tells me it is seen as polite. KJ: It’s called “small talk,” Seven. And I am perfectly fine to sit in silence--my restless night has left me rather cantankerous this morning. (Seven nods in acknowledgement. They have one more moment of silence before Tom and B’Elanna enter. They see the way the Captain is chugging her coffee and decide not to comment. They have a seat as well. AP enters, smiling warmly.)

AP: Good morning, all. Tom, would you mind bringing the Doctor up on this panel so we can begin? Tom: Yes, sir. Will there be anyone else joining us, sir? AP: Yes, but I need to brief you all on your mission first. Tom: Understood, sir. (He goes to the panel, presses a few buttons, and the EMH appears.) EMH: Good morning, Lieutenant Paris. Tom: Good morning, Doctor. AP: Good morning, all. I’m so glad to see you all again. You all know I don’t like to beat around the bush, and there isn’t much time before you need to leave. I’ll be brief. We’ve managed to narrow down the location of the Voyager crew to a section of M class planets toward the border of the Delta and Alpha Quadrants. We’ve not been able to communicate, but the homing signal they sent finally reached us. According to his report, there were several minor injuries, but the planet they landed on had a benevolent species that took pity on them and helped them get to a stable position. They, as far as I know, are waiting to be rescued, as the escape pods were very badly damaged in the landing. We’re giving you a ship to bring back your crew. (brings up an image. smiling) Friends, this is the USS Ohana. KJ: (smiling) Family. Family means no one gets left behind. AP: She’s intrepid class, just like Voyager. She should have more than enough space to get all of you back in one piece. KJ: She’s beautiful. When do we leave? AP: Well, as soon as your new crew members get here. Seven: New crew members? AP: Yes. First, (pulling up a headshot) your head of security and first officer, Lieutenant Commander Tasha Yar. KJ: Yes, she can cover that and tactical until we get to Tuvok. That still leaves Ops, assuming that Tom will be covering the helm. AP: Your new Ops officer, Ensign Ro Laren (headshot). I will warn you, Captain. Both women are extremely opinionated and headstrong. KJ: Outspoken, are they? They’ll fit it well. (as if on cue, the doorbell chimes.) AP: Come! (Tasha and Ro enter.) KJ: (to Tasha) Commander Yar, yes? Tasha: Lieutenant Commander, but yes. Tasha Yar. AP: Report to cargo bay 4 in 2 hours. Dismissed. Tasha: (to KJ) Good to meet you, sir. KJ: Just “Captain” is fine. I’ll be calling you “Number One.” (They all walk toward the Turbolift together.)

Tasha: I am honored. Captain Picard used to call Commander Riker that. KJ: You served aboard the Enterprise? Tasha: Yes, many years ago. I left for another position on a smaller ship that had the opportunity of advancement; Captain Picard gave me his blessing, as he and Captain Anton Farley were in the academy together. (smirking) He said I could learn a good deal from him. KJ: It’s a long story, but I became “Number One” after Commander Riker left for his position aboard The Excalibur. Ensign Ro, is it? Ro: Yes, Captain. Thank you for using my proper name. KJ: No need to thank me for common decency. Commander Chakotay taught me well. B’Elanna: Speaking of Chakotay, where is he? Seven: He is on an extended spirit quest. He left messages with Starfleet Command that he would be back in a few months. Admiral Paris felt it best to respect his religious practices and appoint you instead, Commander Yar. Ro: Now, Chakotay, why do I know that name? B’Elanna: It’s been a long time, but he and I fought with the Maquis against the Cardassians. Ro: But you aren’t Bajoran. B’Elanna: But Starfleet sure as hell didn’t give a damn. We knew what needed to be done, and so we went to help, no matter what that meant.

(Tasha and Ro share a look. They’re uncomfortable and that is clear. They certainly aren’t going to acknowledge what’s bothering them here. The turbolift comes and we are back with KJ and Bev.)

Bev: You’re going to call me every day at lunch, right? KJ: Of course. I looked at the coordinates briefly--it doesn’t seem like it will be that long of a trip as far as navigation goes. The species Tuvok has befriended seems docile and willing to learn from us according to his report. I’d say I’ll be back in a month. Bev: Every day, Kate. KJ: 1200 hours. We’ll keep up. And when I get back, you’ll get to meet my crew. Bev: When you get back, can we tell your mom about us? KJ: (stopping dead in her tracks) Tell my mom? Bev: I don’t have parents to tell that I’m happy. My closest friends and family already know you, especially since Wesley finally came to see me and you met him. It’s time for your mom to know. KJ: I know it’s time. I’m just worried that if we tell her, she’s going to fall apart. It’s only been 6 months since Phoebe died. Bev: Her daughter is happy. How could she “fall apart” over that? KJ: I don’t know. I guess I’m just scared. Bev: We’ll make a trip to see her and tell her in person. It’ll be fun! Plus I’ll finally get to meet Molly and Rocco. I’ve been excited about that for a long time. KJ: Molly and Rocco will love you, and so will my mom after knowing that you’re my girlfriend. (leaning in to kiss her) Just like I love you now. (in each other’s arms) You’re the most loving, loyal, positive, funny, and sarcastic person I’ve ever known. I love you. Bev: I love you, too. KJ: I need to go. Bev: Do you have to? (starting to go in for another kiss) KJ: I might have 15 minutes or so...(going in for a kiss on the neck) Bev: Good. That’s just enough time.

Tasha is packing. Ro enters.

Ro: Tasha, are we not going to talk about this? Tasha: There’s nothing left to talk about. Ro: Yes, there is. We’re going to rescue some former Maquis. Tasha: Former Maquis who then became Starfleet officers. Ro: (sitting down on the bed) Tash, I need a friend right now. Tasha: A Maquis wanting to befriend a Starfleet officer? Ro: Will you just shut UP about that?! (Tasha takes a deep breath and sits down next to her.) I defected to the Maquis, yes. That’s only because I saw my people suffering. I saw myself as a little girl again. I couldn’t watch other people watch their fathers die like I did. I just couldn’t. Tasha: Listen...I’m sorry. I’m sorry I wasn’t there for you. I was hurting for a long time. You and I were really happy, and then you defected. It felt personal. Ro: You know it’s not. Tasha: I saw the way you were looking at that Kira Nerys. Don’t tell me that had nothing to do with it. Ro: That’s just it! Kira had nothing to do with it. Tasha: Bullshit. Ro: Ok. But not in the way you’re thinking. She understood my passion for Bajor. She knew that Starfleet couldn’t help me with that. Tasha: And that’s where the problem really is--you think that I didn’t understand, or that I couldn’t. I grew up outrunning rape gangs, Ro. I know what it’s like to have an unsafe, miserable childhood. Ro: But you don’t know what it is to have someone else understand that and be able to help you through that. Be able to give you something to do about it. Tasha: ...I thought I did. I really thought I did. (Tasha gets up from the bed and starts to finish up her packing.) Ro: Tasha. Tasha: Dismissed, Ensign. (Ro sighs. She looks at Tasha longingly one more time. She leaves.)

Seven is in the Medical facility. It’s clear she’s stressed out. Erin: Annika, just let me take care of that while you’re away. Seven: My name is not Annika any longer. Erin: What should your designation be, then? Seven: Seven of Nine is more than appropriate, even if it is a bit vague. Erin: Seven, please. Just let me take care of the records while you’re gone. Seven: You won’t know what to do. Erin: Yes, I will. Seven: (stops what she’s doing) Show me. (Erin does the same sequence of events Seven has been doing.) You have forgotten to capitalize Biquv’s name under “assigned counselor.” Erin: But is the rest of it up to your standards? Seven: It is...passable. Thank you, Erin. Erin: You’re welcome. (Seven starts to walk away.) I was wanting to talk to you. Seven: (Stops, turns on her heels. slightly annoyed.) Proceed. Erin: We didn’t get the time to be mother and daughter. When you return, could we start getting to know each other? Seven: When I return, I will have many things to do. Erin: But you have to eat. We could at least eat together. Seven: (taking a deep breath) We will attempt conversation once a week. Erin: Five times. Seven: Three. Erin: Sold. Now hurry--your mission can’t wait.

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lieutenantayala · 6 years

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(Warnings for description of injury, referenced torture and death.)

[Captain Janeway wanders the ship, unable to sleep because the nightmares kept her awake again. She enters a room on deck 13 to stop and look at the stars, thinking she's alone.]

Ayala: Can't sleep?

[Janeway jumps and gasps.]

Janeway: Oh, Mr. Ayala, I'm sorry to disturb you.

Ayala: Sorry, Captain. I uh, didn't mean to startle you.

Janeway: No, that's alright I just didn't see you there.

Ayala: Suppose it didn't help that I was lurking in the shadows.

[They both half-smile at each other. Janeway steps up to the view port and turns to look at Mike.]

Janeway: Mr. Ayala, I never personally thanked you for the role you played during the rescue mission or for gathering supplies. You'll receive a commendation for bravery and valor, as will everyone that was involved.

[Janeway steps forward, hand extended. Ayala shakes it.]

Ayala: Thank you, captain. I only wish I could have done more.

[Kathryn smiles, but it doesn't reach her eyes. Mike sees the dark circles under them and takes in the haggard look on her face.]

Janeway: Well, I was just passing through. If you'll excuse me.

[Janeway makes for the door.]

Ayala: Captain, wait. Do you have a minute?

[She hesitates.]

Janeway: Yes, Mike. Is there something I can help you with?

Ayala: I wanted to thank you for writing that recommendation for my boy. You didn't have to do that. It meant a lot to him. Thank you.

Janeway: The pleasure was all mine. You seem happier since the data stream, Lieutenant. Is your family well?

Ayala: Yes, yes they're doing fine. The back and forth communication with Maria was exhilarating.

Janeway: I'm so glad to hear that, Mike. I know it's been hard on you.

[Kathryn stops, thinking she might have said too much or hit a soft spot. Mike shrugs.]

Ayala: It's alright. I'm a tough guy. How have you been?

Janeway: Oh, I'm fine.

[Kathryn shoots him a practiced smile and looks back out at the stars.]

Ayala: Permission to speak freely, Captain?

[Kathryn's jaw tightens and she straightens her back before facing him again.]

Janeway: Granted.

Ayala: I don't mean to sound rude captain, but no. You're not fine.

Janeway: Beg your pardon?

Ayala: You don't have to lie to me. Do you want to talk about it? I have some experience with... these things.

Janeway: There is nothing to talk about. I am fine, I assure you. I perform my duties just as I always have. There is nothing to worry about.

Ayala: I'm not worried about you as a captain. I'm worried about you as a person. I can't ignore... I can't ignore it.

[Kathryn raises her chin and folds her hands behind her back.]

Janeway: What exactly is that supposed to mean?

Ayala: Would you like me to list what I've seen chronologically or alphabetically?

Janeway: I would like your point, Mr. Ayala.

Ayala: Alright. Well for starters, your eyes look haunted. There's always pain and sorrow written across your face when you think no one is looking. I'm not going to pretend to know what you went through on that planet, but it's obvious that you're not dealing with it.

Janeway: These things take time.

Ayala: Absolutely, but that's under the assumption that you're trying to get past it. Not just acting like everything is okay. There are so many people on the ship that would be more than willing to help you.

Janeway: I am fine, Mr. Ayala.

[A long moment passes as they stare steadily into each others eyes.]

Janeway: What has Chakotay told you? Did he put you up to this?

Ayala: What? No. Of course not. He hasn't told me anything. I'm just sick of you pretending to be okay when you obviously aren't.

Janeway: You have no idea what you're talking about, Lieutenant.

Ayala: No, I think you have no idea what you're throwing away by acting like this. You're so concerned with your image or whatever that you can't see how lucky you are to have someone like Chakotay in your life.

Janeway: Lucky? Oh no, 'lucky' isn't the word I'd use. 'Lucky' doesn't describe what I've been through the past few weeks.

Ayala: What word would you use? Why won't you talk about it?

Janeway: I won't because I can't, Mike. I need to be strong for my people. I can't be weak.

Ayala: What you can't just... act like you're human for five minutes? You can't just admit that whatever you went through is tearing you up inside?

Janeway: I can't. I just can't. Whenever I start to think about it, it doesn't stop. I-- whenever I close my eyes I-- I see...

Ayala: It's okay, you can talk to me.

Janeway: It's not okay! Nothing is okay. Do you know how many times I told Freddy everything would be okay as he died in my arms? Can you even begin to understand the things I felt as I he vomited blood all over me and stopped breathing? Do you know what it's like to realize that there is no light that leaves people's eyes as they die? Can you fathom the emptiness I felt as they dragged me off his body?

[Janeway starts pacing back and forth, trembling and erratic.]

Ayala: No, but you could tell me.

Janeway: What makes you so special? Why do you want to know? Are you just going to go to all your Maquis friends and tell them how much of a failure the captain is?

Ayala: Of course n--

Janeway: I couldn't even protect Tal. I couldn't-- I watched her as they whipped her, listened to her scream. I can still hear her in my sleep. They whipped her and beat her for no other reason other than the fact that I couldn't stand anymore. I couldn't put myself between them every time. You don't know what it's like trying to keep someone alive using only your body as a safety buffer. You can't understand what it was like to choke back my own screams in the hopes that if we ever made it out of there alive, she wouldn't be too traumatized! Fat load of good that did anyway, she's in sickbay, dealing with panic attacks and flashbacks. My god, what have I done?

[Janeway slaps her hands down on the edge of the view port. Her knuckles clench and she bows her head. Mike can see her shaking.]

Ayala: I saw Tal earlier. She doesn't blame you. You know that right? She knows that you did everything you could to protect her. These problems she's having will fade over time because she's decided to deal with them, face them, examine them. She's talking to Kes now. Maybe you should consider--

Janeway: Oh no. I'm not going to talk to a damn shrink. I'll be declared unfit, put in a padded room where no one else can be poisoned by my presence.

Ayala: Captain, I think you need to stop and breathe for a moment. You're not seeing things clearly.

[Kathryn rakes her fingers through her hair and continues pacing.]

Janeway: Don't tell me to breathe! You sound like Tuvok. All those damned Vulcan meditation techniques... they're a load of crap. Starfleet training, distancing the mind, none of it did a damn thing. I felt everything as the flesh was torn from my body, as the bottoms of my feet burned away to the bone. My stay with the Cardassians felt like a walk in the park compared to this!

Ayala: Captain--

Janeway: What? This is what you wanted isn't it? You wanted to hear about how Captain Janeway cried and screamed and begged? You wanted to hear about my most intimate failure since I got us all stranded here in the first place?!

Ayala: Captain, please.

[Mike reaches out and touches her elbow, trying to get her to still for a moment. Kathryn rounds on him and lands a heavy backhanded blow across his face.]

Janeway: Don't touch me!

[She advances on him with a look in her eyes that tells him she's a million light-years away. Kathryn raises her hand again, but Mike easily reaches out and grabs her arms. He holds them to her sides as she struggles to get away.]

Janeway: No! Get off of me!

Ayala: Captain!

Janeway: Stop!

Ayala: Kathryn!

[Mike shakes her once and her struggling slowly dies down. Kathryn looks like she's in shock, tears slip from her eyes. In a controlled motion she pushes him away and sways on her feet. She leans against the wall for support before wiping her tears away.]

Janeway: I'm.. I'm so sorry. I-- need to see Chakotay.

[She sounds broken, tired, and doesn't make any move to leave. Mike doesn't want to leave her alone right now.]

Ayala: Alright, let's go.

[Kathryn nods, finishes fixing her hair, and makes sure her face is dry. Mike walks in front of her all the way up to deck three, Chakotay's quarters.]

@voyagerscaptain

#voyager rp #tw: torture #tw: death #space drama

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