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acephysicskarkat · 3 years

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Redemption, Forgiveness and She-Ra S5

So just to spite the anon who told me to stop posting my opinions, I’m gonna post another opinion!

This will contain spoilers for SPOP, Avatar: the Last Airbender, The Good Place, and Steven Universe.

So the most common take that I’ve heard about S5 from Catra stans is that it’s a story about redemption and forgiveness and that if I’m in any way critical of it then I’m saying abusers can never redeem themselves.

To which I say: the second part is a strawman argument, and the first part doesn’t help because it’s a bad story about redemption and forgiveness.

Part 1: Redemption

The problem with S5′s stories about redemption is that they are, universally, undercooked. For things that the fanbase had been wanting for months, they’re surprisingly lacking in meaningful impact.

Catra’s is the least bad, because Catra is at least on-screen long enough to tell us that it seems to be sticking, but it’s still not good. It’s rushed, it’s weightless, and it feels like they didn’t even check what she’d done in the past three seasons that she would need to find redemption for.

At no point does she meaningfully confront her actions (which, in case you’ve forgotten, ranged from bringing about the death of Queen Angella (S3E6), to repeated attempts to murder or permanently harm Adora (S1E11, S1E13, S2E5, S3E4-6, S4E3), to bullying Scorpia (present throughout but most obvious in S4E6), to taking part in a war crime (S4E8)), nor does she really confront the jealousy and spite that drove them. Indeed, the episodes that could have been spent showing us her character development are spent showing us that she still has a very unhealthy attitude towards Adora (S5E6) and telling us that she underwent her character development offscreen, while we were distracted by Double Trouble (S5E8).

Hordak’s is even worse, because Catra at least admits she wronged people, even if the focus is put almost entirely on Catra feeling bad about it. Hordak realises, accurately, that being made into a cog in a machine of conquest is bad (S5E13)...but he never makes the leap onscreen to it still being bad when he did it to other people, as he did to Adora and the other Horde kids (S2E7). It treats Hordak’s decision to break free of Horde Prime as if it in and of itself makes him good, overlooking that the life he’s trying to go back to was the one where he ruled over an empire of stolen children.

I don’t even want to get into Shadow Weaver.

AtLA gave a compelling redemption arc to Zuko by having him confront the consequences of his actions. SU gave a compelling redemption arc to Peridot by showing us, in great detail, her evolution from antagonist to ally. SPOP just kinda tells us that characters are good now and expects that to work out okay.

And the really depressing thing is that both these characters actually could have sustained really compelling redemption arcs! I would have loved to see Hordak meaningfully realise onscreen that the universe does not consist of him, Horde Prime, Imp, Entrapta, and a bunch of largely interchangeable pawns for him to treat as he sees fit. I would have loved to see Catra wrestle with and overcome her resentment of Adora, maybe come to understand that being Shadow Weaver’s favourite fucking sucked actually. The show just didn’t bother, and so what we got was on par with a bad fanfic or the backstory for a D&D character.

Part 2: Forgiveness

For my money, one of the best stories about forgiveness in modern media is in a third season episode of The Good Place called “A Fractured Inheritance”.

Explaining it with as few spoilers as possible, protagonist Eleanor Shellstrop discovers that her cartoonishly neglectful mother Donna faked her death and seems to have built a new life where she’s a good stepmother to a child. Eleanor spends most of the episode convinced that her mother is running a scam, but eventually concludes that this does appear to be sticking and gives up her plan to reveal Donna’s secret, cautioning her not to go back to how she used to be. At the end, she opens up to a friend about the trauma she sustained as a result of her upbringing.

SPOP could never.

"A Fractured Inheritance” tells a more compelling story about forgiveness in 15 minutes of screentime than she-Ra S5 managed in four and a half hours because The Good Place cares about Eleanor’s trauma. It’s portrayed as pretty understandable that she has a grudge against her mother, and working through that takes time and sustained proof that Donna has changed. More than that, forgiveness isn’t portrayed as a magical button that instantly solves Eleanor’s issues; just because she’s letting go of her anger towards Donna doesn’t mean that the harm she suffered as a result of Donna’s neglect goes away. Her fear of opening up or being vulnerable, stemming from a childhood of constantly being shat on when she did, is still there, even after reconciling with her mother.

Contrast this to She-Ra S5. The second Catra says she’s sorry, Adora is willing to forgive her and go across the universe to help her (S5E3), even though in their last interaction, back in S4E3, Adora actively tried to kill her for pretty darn compelling reasons (you may remember those reasons from S3E4-6). Adora gets, like, a brief rant in S5E4 where she seems to be confused about this, but there’s never a point where she meaningfully seems to process the trauma she’s suffered as a result of Catra’s treatment of her, which we know has been toxic, controlling and unhealthy since they were kids (S5E3).

More than that, there’s never really a point where any of the people Catra victimised in the first four seasons gets to deal with that. Glimmer seemingly never realises that Catra is why her mother is dead (S3E6), which is especially jarring given that the effects of Angella’s death on Glimmer drove the entire previous season; Entrapta barely remembers that Catra betrayed her and sent her to her presumed death (S5E6); Bow thinks someone who’s done nothing but attempt to hurt his friends for as long as he’s known her is adorable (S5E8); Scorpia forgives her before she even finishes saying sorry (S5E13); and both Frosta decking her in S5E9 and Perfuma’s understandable irritation with the woman who bullied her GF in S5E10 are portrayed almost as jokes, the latter never escalating beyond mild rudeness.

This also extends to Hordak, who, after his tissue-thin face turn in S5E13, gets a baffling montage that tries to portray his picking up an abandoned child and indifferently turning her over to an abusive sorceress (S2E7) as somehow heartwarming and a big bonding moment, and then the notion that Mermista might have some grudges against the guy who burned down her home and displaced her people (S5E7-8) is framed as comic.

I’m not even saying that neither of these characters should never be forgiven by anyone! Just that the forgiveness they get in the show is lacking in dramatic weight, because the actions that are being forgiven don’t feel like they mean anything. Catra has hurt Adora, Glimmer, Entrapta, Scorpia, Mermista and countless unnamed innocents, and it’s all treated like it has the same impact as borrowing Adora’s Xena DVDs and forgetting to give them back. Hordak should be considered Etheria’s greatest monster given the number of people who’ve died as a result of his actions and maybe one person is slightly irritated at the prospect of having to send him a Christmas card this year.

(This is without getting into the fact that Glimmer and Entrapta are expected to deal with the consequences of their actions to some degree, with each getting an episode focused around that (S2E2, S2E4). It’s kind of wild that Glimmer nearly destroying the world because she took a reckless risk in a desperate gamble to try and save the people she cares about from the Horde blitzkrieg, a gambit that she immediately tried to fix when she realised she’d fucked up (S4E10-13) is treated as something that causes a notable rift in her friendships, but Catra nearly destroying the world because she was just that jealous of Adora (S3E3-6) is breezed past with an “I’m sorry.” Entrapta building the robots causes the Alliance to hold grudges; Hordak waging 25 years of warfare is [shrug] Just Horde Clone Things.)

3. Salvaging These Plot Points

Now, as I implied above, the notion that I think these characters are irredeemable is a bullshit strawman, a thought-terminating cliche that Catra stans use to dismiss criticism without processing with it. So how would I go about it?

Catra

I would start by having Catra and Glimmer be in the same escape. Having her attempt to sacrifice herself in S5E3 had some weird thematic issues given her previously established self-destructive streak (S2E5, most of S3). If we have to keep the bad plot point where Adora recovers the friend who loves and cares for her and immediately goes “well, we gotta leave our friends back home to deal with a colonial invasion while we charge across the universe to save my abusive stalker ex who’s never respected my personhood or autonomy”, I’d probably look at the two biggest missed opportunities in the season: S5E6 and S5E8.

S5E6 is terrible, and should just be expunged mercilessly with fire for its baffling endorsement of the sentiment “yes i abused u but now u hate me so i’m the victim really”. Its replacement should probably be focused around Adora genuinely processing the harm she’s sustained as a result of Catra’s treatment of her, probably deciding at the end that she’ll accept Catra’s help but is still understandably suspicious of her given the established mistrust (S1E8) and hostility (S4E3).

S5E8 is easy to fix, though; instead of it mostly being the characters bumbling around a haunted house, I’d make the setting actually do stuff for the characters’ arcs. We already know that First One ruins can bring up memories, so I’d turn it into a reversal of S1E11 where Adora and Catra’s friendship can actually be rebuilt, probably culminating in Catra saving Adora from falling off a cliff as a symbolic rejection of the resentment she would have been struggling with throughout the episode. This is probably where Adora starts to actually believe that Catra has become a better person.

Basically, the goal here is to show the audience that Catra is working to overcome her issues and become a better person, instead of telling us that it happened offscreen.

Hordak

The problem with Hordak’s face turn is that at no point in the show, including after we’re supposed to treat him as Good Now, does he seem to give a shit about anyone not on a list that contains maybe 4-5 names. I’d probably put in some scenes earlier where his experiences seem to be actually changing him for the better: maybe his response to Entrapta asking him to spare Catra isn’t to commute her sentence to a suicide mission, or he feels a sudden sympathy with a captive Etherian after the fall of Salineas, as the shared feelings of loss line up, and orders their release. Basically, the idea is to put in some groundwork so that it actually feels like he might be safe to have around, instead of him betraying his tyrannical overlord because he misses his life where he was, himself, a tyrannical overlord.

I also would not play the idea that people might be a little bit suspicious of a man with a 25-year history of ruthless oppression, colonial violence and unprovoked warmongering as a joke. Just one of those personal quirks.

4. Summary

In conclusion:

S5 is a bad story about redemption because it doesn’t give the characters being redeemed engaging or compelling redemption arcs, favouring a blind rush to the ending, and it’s a bad story about forgiveness because it treats the actions that are being forgiven as though they don’t mean anything, even when episodes or entire seasons have been built on the effects of those actions. It’s not that these ideas are bad in general, that these characters axiomatically couldn’t be redeemed or that forgiveness is problematic; it’s just that the execution is bad.

Anyway, thanks, jackass anon, for inspiring me to set down my thoughts in detail like this!

#s5 salt #spop spoilers #writing thoughts #redemption arcs #forgiveness

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tedwoodward · 4 years

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Harsh Words

a Bill/Ted breakup fic

i made this post a while back that sparked a fic

Notes: this is entirely angst i’m so sorry, pre-canon, strangers to friends to lovers to exes in just 3k words!

Summary:

He wasn’t always this way. In fact, it may be hard to believe, but Ted Richards used to be known as a nice person.

In October of 2014 he started a job at CCRP Technical. Ted was a sweet man, always there with a smile and a listening ear. He asked about people’s weekends and seemed to genuinely care about their lives.

And then he met Bill Fisher. And resulting from that, in early 2016, just over a year later, Ted’s personality did a 180. Yes, you read that right. The reason for Ted’s shift in attitude came in the form of Bill. Yes, Bill, the sweet man constantly seen gushing about his daughter, the man who never has a harsh word to say about anyone. That Bill. Or, at least, that’s what Ted Richards would tell you.

Warnings: very brief mention of alcoholism; disagreements and a large argument

Read on ao3

He wasn’t always this way. In fact, it may be hard to believe, but Ted Richards used to be known as a nice person.

Ted had only heard about Bill’s divorce through the office grapevine, which he was not prone to listening to, but there’s only so much you can do to not hear the gossip in the break room. Ted felt for him. His sister had gone through a nasty divorce a few years prior, and he knew how hard the whole process had been for her, especially with the kids involved. He hadn’t planned on approaching the man, but when Bill had been having a rough day and had a minor burst of frustration in the break room due to the coffee machine acting up again, resulting in a loud bang as the side of his fist connected with the counter, Ted couldn’t stand by and not reach out.

The man had nearly collapsed into a chair at the table next to the counter, all the fight having left him in his outburst.

Ted slowly approached him, “Hey… Bill, right?”

Bill looked up from where his hand was supporting the weight of his head and nodded with a small, tired smile, “Yeah. I’m sorry, I don’t know your name. Are you new?”

Ted took a seat across from the man and smiled, “Yep! Just started last week.”

Bill found himself smiling back at the man; wow, he was infectious.

“Well, welcome! And sorry about earlier,” he mumbled, waving a hand in the general direction of the counter, “I’ve been running on caffeine for way too long, and I’m starting to crash. We really need a new coffee maker. I’m so sick of this one breaking all the time.”

He sounded so exhausted, Ted couldn’t help but offer assistance.

“Hey, if that’s the case I don’t mind making a run to Starbucks or something. What can I get ya?”

Bill was taken aback. This guy was too nice! “You don’t have to get me anything!”

Ted waved him off, “I gotta get my own caffeine fix somehow, and if that’s kaputt, I don’t mind grabbing something for you as well.”

Bill was no match for Ted’s generosity, and, with a wink and a promise to return with the fuel they needed to get through the rest of the day, the man disappeared. And Bill couldn’t help but smile after him.

The two became fast friends. It was nice to have someone around who was so caring, and that went both ways. Ted supported Bill through the tough days, and he shared stories about his sister and her kids whenever Bill worried about Alice being caught up in the divorce. Bill helped Ted settle into his new environment and worked as hard as he could to make him feel included around the office, knowing how a new workplace could be ostracizing. They fit really well together.

Naturally, it just kind of evolved into something more. Without realizing it, Bill and Ted started spending much more time together than expected. They stumbled into a relationship one evening after accidentally falling asleep while watching a movie together after work one Friday. The two men woke up with Bill’s head on Ted’s shoulder. After a brief moment of semi-awkwardly staring, trying to read each other’s thoughts, Bill kissed Ted.

Ted let Bill set the pace for their relationship. It wouldn’t be fair to rush right into things, and Bill’s mental health was much more important than anything else to Ted.

Things Bill learned about Ted:

(1) He cares so much.

(2) He can read Bill so well and immediately knows when the other is having a rough day.

(3) Ted was kicked out of the house as soon as he turned 18 and was no longer considered his parents’ responsibility. The only family he keeps in touch with is his sister.

(4) Ted secretly loves musicals, but it wasn’t until a few weeks in as Ted was dropping Bill off at home after date night that the latter recognized Jekyll & Hyde playing through the car stereo, and Ted confessed to his deep, dark secret.

(5) Ted can be a cynic at times.

(6) He gets protective over things that mean a lot to him (for future reference: do NOT poke fun at his favorite movies because he will refuse to speak to you for at least a day and only accept your apology after making you listen to his explanation about why you are Wrong).

Things Ted learned about Bill:

(1) He has so much love.

(2) When he gets excited he is the most adorable sight Ted has ever seen.

(3) He’s not the biggest fan of alcohol due to witnessing the effects of alcoholism on a family member when he was younger.

(4) If you mention something you enjoy, Bill will become an expert on it just so you can bond and have someone to talk to who understands what you’re saying.

(5) His ex-wife had Alice while they were in college, and they had stopped loving each other a while before the divorce. Bill had only wanted to stay together for Alice’s sake.

(6) His love for Alice far outweighs any other power on earth.

And that’s where things got a bit rocky.

Not to say that Ted didn’t like Alice, he was just really protective of Bill. The amount of love that man put out into the world was incredible, but it also made him vulnerable. Ted didn’t want to see him hurt, and he was scared to see what was happening with Alice.

Bill only had Alice with him for a week every month, but his world revolved around her when she was with him. It was adorable to see how excited he was to spend time with his daughter. What wasn’t adorable to Ted was hearing about how much she obviously didn’t even care and how little she paid attention to her dad the entire week.

The first day after Alice left to go back to Clivesdale Bill was always sobered, no longer his usual, happy self. Ted would be there for him, and Bill would recount his time with his daughter. What stuck out as wrong to Ted was how much love Bill poured into his child and how little he got back.

Bill defended her. She’s a teenager trying to navigate life with the addition of a divorced family, it’s hard for her. No teenager wants to spend all week hanging out with their lame dad! (“You’re not lame, Bill.” “Try telling that to a 14 year old.”) He understands. He’s not going to stop loving his daughter because she acts her age.

But Ted doesn’t get it. How could she not see the incredible father in front of her? She treats him like crap and ignores him half the time. She doesn’t deserve Bill.

A few months in, Ted told him this much, and that was the beginning of the end. Their relationship began to deteriorate. Bill couldn’t understand how Ted could say those things about a kid, about someone he loved with his whole heart, his source of joy since college. And Ted’s opinion on Alice persisted in the back of Bill’s mind.

The two started getting into arguments much more often. Bill started to see how Ted took “caring” and “protective” too far. Mixed with Ted’s cynicism, Bill was starting to see how stubborn the other man was. And they found that Alice was a topic Bill would never back down on, regardless of his usual demur response to conflict.

The pair noticed this change, of course they did. And they tried to work through it. Bill began inviting Ted along to the activities he planned with his daughter, hoping he would begin to understand and start to love Alice as much as he did. And Ted agreed to give it a go. He really loved Bill and would do anything to mend their issues, and he truly did want to see the good in Alice. Ted tried to bite his tongue and not judge the girl too harshly. He didn’t dare lash out at her when she gave her father attitude (he wasn’t a monster, he's not about to make a 15 year old cry), but it stuck with him all night and ate away at his mind and his heart so much that he couldn’t hold it in. After Alice had gone to her room for the night Bill walked Ted out to his car to say goodbye.

“I had a really nice time tonight. Thank you for being so great with Alice. You are an incredible partner, and this really shows how much you care. I really appreciate you trying.”

“Bill,” Ted sighed. They both knew what was coming. “How do you do it? You are so loving. How can you just accept the way she treats you?” His tone was soft, his eyebrows scrunched in concern. “She was so dismissive the entire time. It’s not fair that you had to carry every conversation with her and only got attitude back. It’s been eating at me all night. I don’t know if I can listen to her treat someone I love like that.”

The pair stood there with tears in their eyes, holding hands as they silently gazed at each other.

“She’s a teenager, Ted. Every kid is like this at some point, and I’m sure the divorce has just made it even worse for her. But she’s here, isn’t she? She wouldn’t be here if she didn’t care about me. She could easily just stay in Clivesdale, but she comes and visits me. I have to give my daughter love and support, Ted, especially during this time of her life, otherwise what kind of father would I be? A few moments of sass and attitude aren’t going to spoil my love for her.”

Ted seemed to take in what Bill had said. It was clear where Bill stood, and it was up to Ted if he could accept it or not. The couple embraced, and Ted made his way home.

The split didn’t come till another month or so later. The two were once again at Bill’s for movie night, somewhat of a Friday night tradition since they first got together. The movie had finished, and the pair were discussing what they had just watched. Once again, Ted absolutely refused to hear Bill out on the reason he enjoyed the protagonist as a character.

“He has such an annoying arc! Who gives a shit about the fucking love triangle? They spent half the movie focusing on who was going to end up together than they did on the actual plot line!”

“But would you rather he have no personal life outside his job? It gives him humanity to have to juggle both situations. Yeah, it’s a bit cheesy that all the issues climax at the same time—”

“I just think it’s stupid.”

“Okay then, how would you have written it differently and still given the characters believability? If you take out the romantic subplot, you lose the chance to see his soft side in addition to his brooding, professional—”

“Well, they just took it too far—”

“Are you gonna let me talk?” Bill asked.

A beat landed silently between the pair.

“What?”

Another beat as the two looked at each other.

“Are you gonna let me talk?” Bill repeated. “This entire conversation you’ve steamrolled over all of my points and refused to let me even finish my thoughts before telling me why I’m wrong.”

“I never said you’re wrong. I just have a strong opinion on this movie.”

“On this movie? What about all the other times we’ve been in this exact situation? Every time we have differing opinions on something you don’t seem to care about my thoughts.”

“Of course I care!” Ted exclaimed defensively. “I’m sorry if I monopolize the conversation, you know I talk too much. Just stop me if you have something to say.”

“But it’s not monopolizing, you just refuse to listen to me. You never give any counter-arguments other than the fact that it was ‘stupid’ or ‘annoying’ or whatever. You’re so stubborn about everything that you refuse to even listen to my opinion when it’s different from yours.”

“I’m not stubborn!”

“Yes, you are! You are relentless when you have an opinion, and you always have an opinion.”

“Oh, I’m sorry. Fuck, I didn’t realize I wasn’t allowed to have my own opinions. I didn’t realize I wasn’t allowed to be fucking passionate about something.”

The tension in the room was ramping up as the two men started getting angrier.

“You can be as passionate as you want, but—”

“But only about certain things, right? I can’t be passionate about a movie, I can’t be passionate about the way dishes are washed,” Ted began to list, memories from past arguments resurfacing. “I can’t be passionate about my partner’s toxic relationship with his daughter—”

“Don’t you dare bring my daughter into this,” Bill warned.

“Oh, that’s rich. Sorry for caring about you. Sorry for not wanting you to be taken advantage of by an asshole teenager who wouldn’t give two shits if you solved all life’s problems for her. I didn’t realize there was a limit on how much I’m allowed to care about you!”

Their voices were raising. They hadn’t gotten into an argument this explosive before, and they both felt it. But neither of them could back down.

“Don’t you say those things about her. You don’t even know her! You never even tried to care for her. Once you got the idea in your head that she wasn’t worthy of my love, I knew you wouldn’t be persuaded. I hoped and dreamed and tried to get you to see what I see, but you’re too stubborn. You’d never change! You can love more than one person, Ted. Didn’t you know that? My love for Alice does not detract from my love for you, but you know what does? Your jealousy and your manipulation and your bullying of my teenage kid!”

Ted scoffed, “Ha! Jealou— manipulation?” Harsh laughs accompanied his words. “Bill! All I ever wanted was for you to see that there are some people who will take and take your love and use it for their own fucking advantage and will never return it no matter how much care you show them.” His tone turned much darker. “Those people do not deserve your love, but you’re too blinded to see that no matter how much you try, you’re never going to get that perfect father-daughter relationship you want with Alice. Okay? She doesn’t. Fucking. Care.”

The two men stood there, breathing heavy and minds racing as they fiercely stared at each other.

Bill tried to compose himself and spoke with an uneven voice, “You’re an asshole, Ted. We’re done, now get out of my house. I should have ended this forever ago.” He strode past the other, cleaning up the dishes from the table next to them.

“Excuse me?” Ted followed the other man into the kitchen, trying to catch up after being taken aback by his words.

“I said, ‘we’re done’. Grab your crap and get out of here.” Bill refused to look at Ted as he washed the dishes from their dinner. “You can’t talk about my daughter like that. I don’t know why I allowed it for so long.”

Ted stared at Bill for a few moments, and when he got no other response or acknowledgement from the man he let out a deep, angry sigh. “Okay, yeah, whatever,” he clipped.

Ted stormed from the kitchen, shoved his feet into his shoes, grabbed his jacket and bag from the living room, and slammed the door on his way out.

Work was tough. It’s hard to be employed at the same office as your recent ex, if only due to the gossip. Anger was still stewing in both of them at the sight or mere mention of the other, so naturally the entire office knew what had happened by the end of the work day the following Monday.

Bill found solace in Paul who immediately supported his reasoning for the breakup.

Of course Paul would take his side, Ted thought, why wouldn’t he? Why wouldn’t the whole office? They all knew Bill much longer than they had known Ted. He’d only worked there for a year, so how much did they really know about his true character? Bill, on the other hand, was a sweetheart. After dealing with a difficult divorce and now a fresh breakup? ‘That poor man,’ they’d all think. Ted fumed.

Everyone was going to take Bill’s side. They’re going to hear all about how Ted was a heartless asshole who hates children, is desperate for attention, and doesn’t care about anyone’s feelings.

You know what? Fine.

Fine. If that’s what everyone expects him to be, then that’s what Ted is going to be. There’s no use trying to get on his coworkers’ good sides when it’s his word against Bill Fisher’s. No. If Bill thinks he’s an asshole, well, all the more reason to become one. There’s no way Ted was going to go through that again. No more wearing his heart on his fucking sleeve. Obviously he’s too passionate when he cares about things, so it looks like he’ll just no longer care about anything. So no matter what fucking bullshit Bill decides to spread around about the breakup, there’s no more reputation to destroy. No, Ted gets to do that himself. That’s one thing he knows he has control over.

#i would like to apologize to alice #ted just has some familial issues he's repressed and hasn't worked out yet #also bill would never spread rumors ted is just stubbornly upset #tgwdlm #starkid #bill tgwdlm #ted tgwdlm #bill/ted #fic #sometimes i write stuff #the guy who didn't like musicals

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itsthatsillygoose · 5 years

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Kit, a raggedy ass analysis

I wrote an analysis of forthbeam last week and y'all we're dragging the others to hell saying they weren't as complex so let me prove you wrong starting with Kit ft. a lot of Ming. If u want my summery Mingkit analysis it's the last paragraph on this post but I'll post it separately too:

Something that really intrigues me about kit is his capacity for other people’s attention. We see through out the first series that Beam is quite a ladies man and is seen many times trying to hit on the stars of the university but for Kit this is rare. Aside from Pha, Beam and Forth, Kit is rarely seen interacting with anyone one else closely and think that speaks volumes of his personality. He may be stubborn and sometimes aggressive but I think deep down he's compensating for a lack of security, all he really wants is that resounding feeling of safety and he finds that with in the tight knit friendship between him, Beam and Pha; and perhaps that’s what makes his relationship with Ming so infatuating.

Ming is the very definition of what Kit seems to avoid, he is bold and loud, clumsy with his feelings, a stranger. He's a player and doesn't need that sense of security like the other which seemed to be the biggest red flag to kit during their development. Imediately when the two first properly meet there’s a sense of surprise from the shorter when he finds that Ming still remembers him, and straight away he throws up his guard. Through out at least the series so far it's almost like Kit wants himself to hate Ming or at least he feels like he should; he knows Ming is everything he seeks to avoid and so he tries to act accordingly. He constantly seems frustrated around him but rather than being agitated by Ming, I think what's really bothering him is himself and the way he can't help but yearn for these moments of having the other around. Doesn't make sence right? Surely he'd be happy if he actually wanted to see him? Well you'd figure, but perhaps it causes Kit such anguish as he knows while having Ming around he loses control and he doesnt want to give him self the oppertunity to get to know him or like him as even just a friend,,, and so instead he snaps at him. Again I think this was a really subtle and lovely way of displaying Kits issue; he truly is an increadible example of head vs heart.

I loved looking deeper into these two as they appear to have such a typical dynamic of cat and dog, but I really think the second series explored so much deeper into their personalities and character. I think what is really being portreyed by these two is so much more than just a spunky journey of two boys in love. Really I think that we delve into dealing with the concept of searching for trust and a sense of clarity in not only someone else but yourself too. I do think that kit is perhaps the “protagonist’ of this idea. Ming is very much the big scary monster in the dark for him. Whether Kit had had partners before or not I'm unsure but I think the reason why Ming really affected him so incredibly was that he’d never been loved in such a way, so shamelessly and intensely, especially by someone like Ming. Someone he’s so unalike in so many ways. Really I think their arch isn’t about Ming breaking into Kit's abrasive character but rather Kit searching for truth and a reason to believe in ming and the insecurities on both ends of that.

We see many times that kit is appalled by Mings ways, for example the way ming had so many ex partners, this was such a big piece information to just be brushed over; infact its exactly what knocked kit so far from feeling like he could reach out and grasp onto Ming. Again referring back to before, I think kit really yearns for a sence of safety in everyone he brings close to him, a place to relax, someone he can trust enough to not hide behind his front; he doesn’t care to be played with or used so seeing that ming would throw away his past relationships so readily perhaps triggered that insecurity as he rightly so doesn't feel that sense of security with ming. He appears unpredictable to Kit, almost as if he throws his feeling around carelessly, but we know this isn't true and that in fact Ming is increadibly predictable.

We see more of this when Kit storms away at the beach telling ming to stay where he is (which he does). Personally this is still one of my favourite scenes as it's fucking bursting with emotion and crammed with developing concepts i've already mentioned but it really does just get me every time. There's so much to unpick, it really was the turning point for the two- at least in my eyes. It admittedly does just appear as if Kit got short tempered and barked at Ming who then got upset and sulked, but really the scene is a lot meatier. It was really a big eye opener for kit as though neither of them spoke about what happened, it really felt like they both knew Ming was proving to kit that he takes his word seriously, and isn't afraid to commit to him. Kit seemed guilty when the scene returned to him and the others drinking but when Ming was dragged in by another friend Kit seems shocked realizing he probably would have sat there all night if it had played out that way. Maybe he assumed ming had gone back to his room but the fact he didnt was such a slap in the face. I love this cause Ming stares at him sadly, knowing full well he's proven a point. Kit knows he's upset Ming and realises that rather than Ming not taking the idea of a relationship seriously, perhaps he himself was the one dismissing any chance of something real, some clarity. Maybe he was his own scary monster in the dark. He knows full well that Ming is harmless or else he wouldn't have appeared so guilty when returning to the hang out without him.

The whole beamkit scene where beam pulled a doozy on us and pretended he and kit were dating is another obvious telling of his character, (nines expressions in those few seconds were fucking ace btw, the absolute utter panic swirling into sorry eyes, then a punch in the gut and finally regret) in those few moments alone its obvious that he knows he's done Ming wrong, but if you really look closer there's a whole ugly ass betrayal hiding in there. In the chat they just had in a prior scene, Kit makes a point out of not wanting to get hurt by Ming leading him on only to ditch him for another person, but what did kit just do to Ming? Huh?¿?? Exactly, its easily missed but it's an awesome detail i picked up when diving into this and i have to say it was another perfect example of Kit being flung between head vs heart. Kit's been trying so hard to get Ming to use his head rather than his heart, but by using his own head to try and protect him self Kit's only gone and done the exact thing he was so afraid happening to himself to Ming. I think realising this he understands that even though they're so different and worlds apart, they're both just dumb fucking humans and he shouldnt be so hard on Ming, especially when Ming's been nothing but loyal and honest. Perhaps Kit is scared of committing but he's projecting that onto Ming because he doesn't want to admit it, he only sees what he wants to see because thats all he knows after putting up a front for so long when ever his emotional well being is threatened.

Honestly Kit's really just been his own problem this entire show and he really ought to sit the fuck down and let him self live 👏🏻

Thought it was endearing when he took Pha out so he could get drunk. Obviously getting wasted to forget your problems isn't particularly endearing, but like i said about Beam last week, it makes him feel more human. Especially when Beam shows up acting like the whole beamkit couple thing was a joke (when it clearly wasn't) and Kit's just like fuck you you're so annoying. Smh he really is boo boo that fool. He's just so completey oblivious that his best friend in the entire world is head over heels in love with him, so gullible just believing what ever the fuck anyone says. I'll give him the benefit of the doubt seen as he was drunk but Idk it just tickles me that he's always so tense and always so on guard yet the level of dumbassery is just,,,, how's he gonna be a doctor when he's literally a raw nerve on fucking legs. Bless.

He really lets things bother him, but he's much more readable than beam which we know even just from Phana knowing right away what was up. The fact he hid from Ming when Ming entered the bar(?) too really emphasized how completely not as hard as nails he is despite how he tends to act tough. Thought that was a sweet detail in unravelling Kit's personality and how Ming seems already to have completely knocked his walls down; Kit's not even trying to act like he's unaffected anymore.

We all joke about Beam being an emotional wreck but fr kits really not that far behind. He deals with everything horribly and always seems to make shit worse for both himself and Ming. He just wants what's best for everyone but sometimes that's harder than it looks and he really proved that. He goes into panic mode if Ming so much as breaths in his direction which actually does the complete opposite of intended as rather than seeming tough and cold, it just shows Ming that Kit's easily flustered around him, EG, HE FUCKING LIKES HIM, KIT JUST WRITE IT ON YOUR FOREHEAD AT THIS POINT. He thinks he's so mysterious fr, boy the whole world and it's goldfish has you sussed, who do you think your fooling with that attitude?

Can't not mention the kiss and how sweet that was on Kit's end. After all that mess and acting unaffected, as soon as he sees Ming move towards him he imediately melts back into his big softie boyf as if he'd been waiting a life time to kiss him. He literally called him a 'bastard' seconds before, if that ain't some sort of chaotic then what the fuck is he. Jkjk, back to the point, Kit does this thing where he lies to him self, C O N S T A N T L Y. He's forever telling himself that he's in control, he's forever telling himself that Ming's out to get him, he's forever acting as if he doesn't want anything to do with Ming, but this scene was so satisfying cause it really just ripped everything he'd been pretending to be from right underneath him. He kissed Ming so readily and for the first time in the relationship he actually seemed put together and calm and in control. He's never known what to do with Ming's attention yet here and now with his lips on his all he could do was reach out and grasp on to his 'scary monster in the dark' (Side note i absolutely fucking adore how Kit's gone from being so rough and brash with Ming to being so ridiculously shy after the kiss. I think it's forced him to face facts and he finally realised there was no point in keeping up his walls. Ming knows now, theres no need. It's sweet showing his vulnerable side for once, this is some healthy character development i can get behind.)

You'll have noticed this gradually got less formal and is slowly making less and less sense. That's because as i'm writing this it's 5:40am and the brain juice is running low but the next bit should be a pinch more coherent sorry,

What i love about Kit and Ming's relationship is the whole role reverse as the series progressed. At the beginning we see Kit, part of a solid group of friends and he's comfortable and confident where as Ming's just a new student at the university, finding his feet. We expect him to perhaps be naïve or immature, and yes he's a little clingy but really Ming is one of the most stable characters going and exactly what kit needs despite how he first appeared. Not once has Ming changed his goal of pursuing kit, not once has he fucked up, not once has he ever panicked. Ming- even though he's sulky- is really quite mature with his dealing of Kit. He's honest and really does what ever he can to make it work. I loved the example of this where he backed off after the kiss. It was so so sweet considering how clingy he usually is, and it really shows he takes great time and contemplation when considering Kits feelings and that he has a really deep understanding of how Kit's mind actually works and how he may react. He backs off knowing Kit likes his space and that maybe he over stepped the line pretending to be black out drunk, but again i really love this as this creates that safe space and feeling of clarity that i keep bringing up as it meant kit could reach out in his own time and really come to terms with things without any pressure. It meant that for once Kit would have to make the move to communicate and take a step in their relationship and i think for Ming to take that initiative to really somewhat place their fate in Kits hands for a while was really quite sweet and mature of him. We stan our emotionally healthy engineering boys fr. We come to realise by now that perhaps Kit is actually quite bashful and somewhat of a baby dear when it comes to emotions, charging head first into anything but initially losing his footing right off the get go. But Ming is stable, he is collected and cool and surprisingly gentle. Its really quite tell tale that kit spoke so much about ming maybe lacking in commitment when really he was the one too afraid to commit, he was clearly insecure. This arch really was kit heavy and though i already said what i think their arch focuses on, i just want to add that it also explores growth and becoming a better person because of a relationship. They bounce off eachother in such an interesting way, and so intunely that they cant help but work. Kit never knows what to say or how to approach ming but its okay, Ming has that covered and always comes to find him. Ming's very flirtatious, and kit and easy to fluster. Kit needs time and Ming is patient. All these little north and south traits really just pull together and i love how these two were written with such harmony. I know I've delved way deeper than was ever intended for these characters but i think we shouldn't take for granted the complexity of such a wonderful thing.

This is the reason why i think 2moons2 is miles ahead of 2moons the series. Aside from the cringe music, over dramatic zooms and lingering shots which can sometimes make it difficult to watch, 2moons2 really seeks complexity in each character and i admire that itch to bring them to life as i feel 2moons was increadibly 2D in this aspect. I only really believed in Kit when i watched that series, but 2moons2 really forces you to believe and invest in every main character and i just think as someone who writes that it's rather lovely.

What are your thoughts? Do comment if you have time, I'd love to hear more on these two :)

#2moons2 #2moons2 the series #2moons #2moons the series #2 moons 2 #pha #phana x wayo #phana #phayo #wayo #mingkwan #mingkit #ming #kitkat #kit #forthbeam #forth #beam

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amosbarot · 5 years

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( cismale ) haven’t seen AMOS BAROT around in a while. the DEV PATEL lookalike has been known to be (+) INSOUCIANT & (+) KEEN, but HE can also be (-) TROUBLED & (-) DERISIVE. The 24 year old is a SENIOR majoring in COMPUTER ENGINEERING. I believe they’re living in AUDAX but I popped by earlier and no one answered the door. ( james. 20. EST. she/they. )

hello !! here is my other baby, who is...somehow, more of a mess than naeva !! no dilly dally, let’s jump right into it !!

TW: drug addiction/abuse, car accident. mental illness.

a e s t h e t i c s ( except i am a sham of a person and sorta very much forgot to save my aesthetics so ! winging it ! )

floral suits and a light air of mock-arrogance, charming smiles and a mischievous glint, easy sarcasm and raised eyebrows. rolling joints resembling cigars, smoke drifting towards ceilings as conspiratorial rambles escape intoxicated lips, wild gestures and toppled book stacks, four expresso shots at the stroke of midnight and equations leading off whiteboards. heavy eye bags and warm smiles, dismissive words and excuses. sleepwalking to the middle of the quad for the third time that week, donning white boxers littered with red hearts...again. secret glances and barely contained excitement, distractions from the obvious.

general info !!

full name: amos ronak barot

nickname(s): n/a !!

b.o.d. - january 17th, 24 yrs old, capricorn

label(s): the academic, the ebullient, the fallen, the icarcian.

height: 6′2″

hometown: london, uk ooo fancy

sexuality: wildly. chaotically. bisexual.

his stats can be found HERE

and his pinterest can be found HERE !

biography

introducing...another one of indira’s cousins !!!!

born to olena barot, member of the american embassy in london/future U.S. ambassador to the UK and ronak barot, CEO of his very own computer company. needless to say, he and his younger sister alya were born into a certain wealth

they hopped between the US and the UK and wherever else they desired to go on vacation to with ease; UK for school and US for breaks, rome or paris or wherever else, simply whenever.

despite this though !! olena and ronak had always wanted their children to find their own success, to be financially stable without their assistance once they got older. therefore, it was a known fact in their household that they’d be cut off financially by the time they were 21.

luckily, neither of them really minded this? both children had always had an extreme thirst for knowledge and a wonder for things. even so--their childhood wasn’t quite typical, as their competitive natures led to them trying to one-up each other?

alya and amos grew up extremely close to each other, being so close in age it really didn’t feel as if she was the younger sibling; they were more like twins than anything. obviously, amos still gloated about being the eldest, but their bond was tight.

there were moments in their childhood where if anybody, and i mean anybody--spoke ill of alya, amos would get into physical alterations. he’s much more peaceful now, but the history is still there.

by the time amos entered sixth form, his studies were--while still very important to him--less frequent. he’d go out nearly every night, gone whole weekends, partying or being a general hooligan.

alya, however, did not partake in these activities. this is where they differed--amos had always been an extrovert, fond of crowds and people and being in the center of it all. causing ruckus. wrecking havoc. alya’s always been...reserved, in the best way possible. few knew just what a gem she was, but she really was to be treasured. even so--the less time amos seemed to spend at home, the more distant alya became towards him.

but, surprise: despite being literally, incredibly smart, amos got BIG DUMBASS ENERGY and was very very oblivious to the why and how of this. which really, really did not help.

unfortunately, there wasn’t any time to dwell about this.

around the same time, tragedy struck the barot family.

after one of his lil’ runabouts, amos came home to find furniture being escorted out of their house, police--his sister crying, his mother ashamed, his father nowhere to be found.

and soon after, amos found out that his father was arrested for a scandal that sent many into a tizzy. essentially: the company fucked over their own customers via stealing their info, committing some fraud, y’know, credit cards and social security numbers, sellin’ it. just. some nasty white collar crime.

it also wound up fucking up olena’s newly acquired position as the US ambassador for the UK. she was released from the embassy during ronak’s trials.

he ultimately wound up in prison, and olena moved their family back to the U.S.

and amos--being the big dumb baby he is, figured the best thing to do was to pretend it hadn’t bothered him one bit! so he did exactly that!

i imagine that they moved close to indira’s family, and amos spent a lot of time with her from there then.

however, in between pretending things were fine and dandy, and home life, and the drag and pull of parties, anxiety weighed down amos’ bones like...constantly. his family was now, essentially, poor with a mass debt thanks to their father. the expectations for amos to do good, to be better--the fall of amos’ biggest role model.

it was all too much. anxiety attacks became frequent, provoked by the slightest thing--he could only lay awake at night, sleep infrequent. he was diagnosed with generalized anxiety disorder and insomnia, and treated for both--some days it still doesn’t feel like enough.

getting a scholarship to lockwood is probably the best thing to happen to him in a long time. it was a new look into a potential future.

got into the uh...career, of sorts, of doing people’s assignments for them for a hefty payment, alongside his normal job. just to make sure he had spending money and whatnot.

involving tatiana: their friendship bloomed after he did a few assignments for her, y’see--then came the midnight adventures, and whatnot. i wouldn’t have called them close by any means, but they had fun together when they weren’t arguing. their friendship ended after a pretty bad car accident--neither were fatally hurt, but the car was wrecked and it was amos’ fault and it just. sorta was the end of that.

he’s got a...reliability on his sleeping pills, if you will. it’s not healthy in the slightest, but he’s convinced it’s nothing serious. it’s pretty serious.

his eyesight is also getting worse--expected to become legally blind by the time he’s forty.

more on those l8r

personality

there’s a lot of words you can use to describe amos! pretentious, sarcastic, provoking, hardly ever serious, immature, petty, Just Like That, full of himself, smartass, big dumbass energy. y’know. just an infinite amount.

he can be so dramatic! everything he does is exaggerated. he rolls cigar-sized joints at every party. goes around with a horrible ‘20s mobster voice, voicing his lil’ conspiracies.

it’s both hard and very easy to forget that amos graduated as valedictorian of his high school (stealing it, from somebody else--i should mention, as he came in halfway thru the year and kinda just. snatched the title.) because he can be a real idiot sometimes.

because he tries to hard to mask his insecurities, he overcompensates with just. being childish. he’s fun to be around but sometimes he can just be. exhausting.

so like, he went into computer engineering because that was just sorta what he always wanted to do? besides programming? he really wanted to take after his father--but with him being in jail and whatnot, kinda puts a damper to that dream. still, he can’t stop.

so he’s just. really good with computers tbh?? built his own, programmed his own firewall. his dream is to open his own cybersecurity company.

VERY STRESSED LIKE CONSTANTLY like catch him in the library with six empty coffee cups surrounding his work, it’s 2am--he hasn’t slept, in fact his eyes are likely taped opened. he works a lot.

but parties...a lot more! he tries rly hard to not mix his medication with anything so that leads to him...not always taking it, or overcompensating when he misses. it’s a mess. he’s a mess. he thinks he knows what he’s doing but he’s NOT.

i think...i’d consider him lovable. he’s a lil eccentric, a lil high energy.

LOVES HIS FAMILY. like, listen. he still loves his dad. would protect his cousins and sister and mother with his mf life.

alya and him aren’t on the...best terms rn. so that Hurts.

he can be really petty tbh ?? like he can’t take arguments seriously so he just becomes this fucking manchild. he will mimic u. he’ll mock u. he can be hurtful.

god...i don’t even know what else to say. just take him TAKE HIM

wanted connections

as always, i am a big slut for every connection.

give him his Lads. his buds. his pals. his broskis. his bromances.

ride or die(s)

people he tutors !! people whose work he does for them !!

somebody who goes to him b/c of computer troubles n he’s just like...r u going to pay me or nah

high school friends??

party pals??

his sister may become a WC in the future but idk quite yet, we do stan her though !!

drug dealer pls n thank

ex friends ?? fake friends ?? toxic friends ??

bad influences ?? good influences ??

hook ups ?? like a lot of ‘em ??

confidante ?? just somebody he can. rant to.

academic rival just b/c i really love intense study-offs

enemies for whatever reason ??

exes ??

particularly this one ex he was really, really in love w/ but life just got really stressful and idk it affected their relationship and they sorta just. ended it. idk who ended it w/ who but it probably wasn’t mutual and he’s probably really still hung up about it.

i mean i’ll take...anything...did they run into each other once and now just see each other everywhere??

unrequited things??

really cute close friendships??

#water:intro #hi it takes me fifty years to do things but i DID IT

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choisgirls · 7 years

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In the Right Direction { VxMC - Soulmate!AU}

Words: 3,620 (so its a long post and I won’t put it under a “keep reading” because that messes up on mobile for some reason?)

So here’s the first part of that Soulmate!AU I talked about a very;;; long time ago ^^;; But here it is;; idk if its good but here you are;;; ~Admin 404

JUMIN

His compass practically screamed that this cute, blonde girl in his gallery wasn't the person he thought she was. He elected to ignore this stupid hunk of junk because he believed he had found his sun. Though Jumin has told him numerous times to listen to his head every once in a while instead of his heart, he just couldn't dismiss these strong feelings.

When he found her and their relationship to be... less than ideal, he should have listened to his head. Could he just up and leave this women he spent so much time, passion, and love on? He could live with growing old with someone besides his designated soulmate, as long as he was with someone he loved. But now she's gone, and he has nothing left to look forward to.

The people close to him knew how much he wanted to find the love of his life-- how much he just wanted to love and be loved back. They've always told him to just follow his compass, don't look up until the needle starts to spin like crazy. You would think that's what he would be doing from the beginning, but he wanted to give everyone a chance.

Most people in this world look only for their soulmate-- using the compass given to them at birth to search the world with a fine-toothed comb, eyes constantly glued to the small circular object-- missing out on amazing connections, marvelous adventures-- they're missing out on what could have been an extravagant love! He wanted to change all of that; he wanted to prove that you can live happily with someone you love, despite the fact that someone is out in the world, completely perfect for you. Love can be found in imperfections.

His history with Rika didn't change this outlook on this ideal, not even in the slightest. If anything, it solidified his thoughts! He truly loved her, but now he's able to see that he just wasn't the one for her and vice versa. Though, after the ordeal, he was left wondering just how love would feel with his soulmate. Someone he was literally made for... the love had to be something other-worldly, right?

Jumin was the one to finally push him into searching for you. Jihyun was already traveling for his photography, it wouldn't be too hard to search for you as well. It took quite a bit of pushing to get him to agree, however.

"V, listen to me. You're already going abroad to take photos for your next gallery. You can search for your soulmate along the way," he explained, taking a sip from his glass of wine.

"But what if Rika was already the one? What if my compass is just broken? What if it never worked in the first place? What if-" he was cut off by Jumin scoffing.

"Why don't you just try it, V. It really won't hurt you. You might find your other half, the perfect one for you, the peanut butter to your jelly, your-"

"Who are you and what have you done to Jumin Han?" his laughter following the question soft and light, "I thought you didn't believe in love of any sort?"

�� His friend shrugged before taking another sip of his wine, "I don't exactly, but I do believe in your happiness. I think you should try and find what I know will make you the happiest."

That was it- that was all he needed to now be sat on a plane, looking out of the window at the clouds surrounding the aircraft. 'I won't look at my compass until I'm settled in on the ground. I won't make this a big thing,' he thought to himself, 'it'll be alright. If I find them, great, if I don't, that's alright too.' All the excitement he had for this photography trip was slowly deteriorating because he couldn't help but think about the navigation device. What if he really did find the one on this trip? What would he even do; what would he even say? He couldn't help but be worried about just who you were, how the two of you would intermingle- but his biggest worry was what if you didn't believe in soulmates? What if you were like him, and believed in natural love, but only natural love?

Those intrusive thoughts were the only things he could think of. It finally got to the point where he put his camera down and only followed his compass. He followed it across multiple cities, countries even! The only time he was ripped away from his compass was when he kept receiving call after call from Saeyoung.

"Is everything alright? You've called me a lot in the past-"

"There's someone new in the chatroom," came Luciel's anxious voice, out of breath and dripping with concern.

"What do you mean? That's impossible, isn't it? I thought you had everything secure and-"

"I did! I did and that's the problem! How did they get into the chat? How did they get past all of my security, how did they-"

"Luciel," Jihyun started, speaking low and slow to help his friend calm down, "Take a moment to catch your breath. Obviously, finding out how this person joined our closed group is the big question here, but you have to think about another fairly important question."

"And what is that exactly?" He asked, audibly a little calmer thanks to Jihyun.

"Just who this person is. Running a background check is fairly important. We don't know who they are, or if they're trying to harm us. I'm counting on you to figure this out, Luciel," he couldn't bring himself to talk anymore, so he hung up the phone. He felt as thoughts rushed through his mind- who could it be? How did they get into their private messenger? Are they there to hurt him or his friends? Was it... no, it couldn't be. His phone lit up less than a moment later, baring Luciel's name again.

"Did you find anything?" he asked, not so much as a hello.

"It's a girl," he replied- he seemed 10 times more calm than he did in his last phone call.

"A girl? Really? I need all of the details, no matter how small you think they are," he started to head back where he was staying during his trip, the photos and compass both thrown to the back of his mind. 'Finding love can wait,' he thought, 'my friend's securities are much more important.'

Later that day, he finally got a chance to log into the chat room, hoping to talk to this new stranger. It was a simple conversation, but he felt this weird feeling in the bottom of his stomach. Was this feeling fear? Maybe it was panic? He just knew it was brand-new and unexplainable. Brushing it off as the general anxiety that comes with a situation such as this one, he decided the best course of action would be to work with her. Denying her access could make things 10 times worse. He didn't want to believe that this could have been connected to Rika and her organization, but he couldn't rule it out, either. He headed home the moment he could, his photos could wait, his compass was thrown into his jacket pocket and forgotten about.

The first few nights, he found himself logging into the chatroom once everyone had gotten off, reading each and every message. All of them wanted him to set a date for the new party, but he wasn't sure he wanted to. He had a bad feeling that his previous love was behind it all, but reading how nice and caring you are to all of his friends... he didn't think you were truly involved. You were some sort of pawn and he hated that you were a pawn in this mysterious game.

But, looking through all of the messages, he always found himself smiling when he saw your name popping up and he didn't bother to stop himself. You were so warm and inviting, you seemed interested in everyone's well beings, and you had nothing to gain from caring about them all yet you continued to. You were... different than Rika. You were everything Rika pretended to be.

As days passed, everyone seemed openly surprised the fact that Jihyun had come to the chatroom more often than he has in the past few years, but he couldn't explain to them why. Although it hurt to stare at the phone for too long, he suffered through it just to talk to you. When he couldn't see anymore for the day, he would call you. Talking until the early hours of the day were a common thing between the two of you already. Hearing you fall asleep on the phone made his heart skip a beat, and he didn't think he could feel that again- let alone so soon.

You talked about anything and everything. Places you'd love to travel, stories behind some of the pictures he's taken, he's even talked to you about his concerns for his friends and a hypothetical situation about his ex. He felt like he could talk to you about anything in the world, but it had only been a few short days. Sure, he was open with his love and cared about everyone but there was just something a little bit different with you.

"MC, may I ask you something?" he whispered into his phone, laying in his bed with an arm thrown over his currently burning eyes, his phone to his ear.

"You know you can ask me anything, V," you answered just as quietly, though to him it sounded as if you were always singing. Your voice was just so heavenly to his ears and his heart.

"It's about love. What do you believe in?" he paused, taking in a shaky breath that he hoped you couldn't hear. "Do you believe in natural love? Or do you believe in the fact that everyone has someone in the world made specifically for them?" he asked cautiously, scared to hear a certain answer. When you took what felt like a million years to answer in that sweet, soft voice of yours.

"I believe in love. Whether its love that forms between two people who truly have a connection, or if it's the kind of love between two halves of one soul. Either of them are absolutely beautiful," you answered, hearing him let out a soft sigh. He couldn't help but smile at your answer. Why did he even bother to ask? Somewhere in the back of his mind, he knew you would view it in the same light as himself.

"Have you been in love, MC?" he asked before he could even realize the thought passed his mind. You gave a soft sound of disagreement, and his previously large smile simmered down to a softer, warmer one. "One day," his words ghosted, "I hope that love is directed towards me."

His hand flew to his mouth and his eyes shot open, realizing the words that just came from his mouth. "I-I um," he stammered, his face turning a crimson colour, "F-forget I said anything. It's... it's late, I should have let you gone to bed a while ago, I apologize. I'll um, I'll speak to you tomorrow. Good night."

He rushed to end the call, his hands shaking the whole time as he strained his eyes to see the end button on his phone. He was in such disbelief that he let that slip off of his tongue. There was some sort of feelings for you in his heart but he didn't know if it was love per say. It was different than what he felt for Rika, but he knew he wanted to pursue it, just... not so suddenly. He spent hours just thinking, burying his face into his pillow and contemplating all of his feelings. He was afraid he made things uncomfortable between the both of you and he was worried. However, now the need to protect you was solidified in his mind- he couldn't let anyone get to you, not even Rika.

Over the course of the next two days, he still visited the chatroom to see you, but not for as long as he previously would. He noticed that you treated him just the same as before, but he couldn't shake his awkward feeling. He decided to just talk through it with you at the party, that way he has a day or so to prepare exactly what he wanted to say. Too bad Jihyun's plans never work out the way he wants them to.

He picked up his phone, greeting a frantic Luciel. Before he could mutter a 'What's wrong', Luciel is talking a mile a minute and Jihyun just couldn't keep up.

"V. It's the security system for the apartment," the younger man started. Jihyun moved to sit on the edge of his seat, his eyebrows furrowing together. "The... special security system," he finished. His eyes practically popping out of his head, Jihyun stood up, already trying to feel his way to his front door.

"What about the system? What's wrong with it? What about MC? Luciel, please tell me that MC is alright," he panicked, feeling around for his jacket. He didn't want to hear what was coming next but he knew he had to, for MC's safety.

"It's... it's been compromised, someone hacked into it. Probably the same person who led MC there in the first place. It's been armed and disarmed, over and over again. I've been trying to take back control of it, but there's always the possibility that they could-" Jihyun cut off the red head with a loud curse. Luciel knew just how upset his friend was now due to the fact he next to never used such strong language.

"I'm going. I'm getting MC out of there," he stated, leaving the house and frantically trying to make his way to the apartment. He was tired of hearing Luciel try to tell him to just stay put, it was too dangerous, especially for him and the state of his eyes but he didn't care. All he cared about was getting you out of that apartment and getting you safe, away from it all, where he can physically hold and protect you. He never even got to see you in person, there was no way he was going to let the world take you from him so soon. There were so many things he wanted to know, needed to know about you before he would ever be satisfied in life.

Breathing heavier than he ever had in his life, legs shaking like Jell-O, and his eyesight worse due to the mixture of terrified tears and the wind piercing his eyes, he arrived at the apartment, knowing he had to calm himself down before MC opened that door. Leaning a hand against the doorway to make sure he didn't fall over, he brought his other hand to knock on the door. Before he did, he could hear your panicked voice muffled behind the door.

"Seven, what do you mean? What are you talking about? A BOMB? There's a BOMB in this apartment? Why would you- Who would-," he could only imagine you would shake your head in disbelief at this point, "Nevermind. You know what I don't want to know why there's a FREAKING BOMB. So what... what do I do? Do I... do I leave? Do you think it'll go off?"

Jihyun's fist hovered in front of the door, afraid to knock and only make the situation worse. Maybe Luciel was right? Maybe he shouldn't have come, the younger man was surely capable of taking care of it himself. His self-doubting thoughts were washed away when he strained to hear your quiet voice whimper behind the door.

"I just wish V were here. He'd know what to do. I'd definitely feel better..." hearing you wish for him brought the warmest smile to his face. His heart started to beat so fast it stuttered and his whole abdomen was full of millions of butterflies. Before he could change his mind or run away, he rasped his knuckles against the door, ready to finally see you with his own two eyes... He hoped he would be able to see clearly when the door flew open. He could hear Luciel yelling through the phone not to open the door, in case it was the hacker, he saw a figure wielding what looked like a lamp over their head, ready to protect themselves.

"MC, wait! It's me," he begged, stepping back slightly to avoid the lamp colliding with his head if you were to swing. He watched the lamp get lowered as you raised your face to look him in the eyes. He believed in heaven, he believed in angels, and he believed in miracles- you were all three to him in that exact moment.

His fuzzy eyesight didn't clear completely, but when he looked at you, it seemed like you were in high definition. The world was blurry but you were the clarity in his life he had been looking for- apparently you were the clarity his eyes needed as well. He quickly glanced at his surroundings, noticing nothing was clear to him but you. You seemed to have this heavenly glow surrounding you as well- was this what an aura was? Or was that the indication of your wings, because he sincerely believed you had wings. He felt like he had finally found the last true mouthpiece of heaven, these few seconds feeling like the rest of his life, and he was content with that. Your growing smile was like the light of God, shining brightly and piercing him straight to his heart and soul.

He watched as you ran towards him, his arms instinctively opening to hold you close. The moment your bodies made contact, electricity shot through him, and his chest felt... full. He knew his heart was pounding loud enough for his newfound love to hear, but he didn't care. He wanted them to know just how fondly he thought of them, how much they had an impact on his heart.

"MC, it's alright, I'm here for you," he whispered against the top of your head, burying his smile in your hair before continuing in a soft voice, "I came to protect you." keeping your arms wrapped around him, you pulled you head away from his chest to look up at him, locking eyes and offering him a small smile.

"You ran all the way here, for me?" your smile dropped, a concerned look replacing it, "but you could have been really hurt! V, that's-" he cut you off by placing a finger to your lips, smiling at the small blush that rose on your cheeks.

"Jihyun. Please, I want to hear that heavenly smooth voice say my actual name," he proposed, gently laughing at just how much your blush had grown. He wouldn't bother hiding his feelings anymore, he had already exposed himself days before. You hid your face back against his chest, running from your embarrassment as the two of you just stood holding each other in the hallway for several minutes. Luciel kept taking screenshots from the security cameras and sent them to the group chat, frantically fangirling.

Your eyebrows furrowed together as you removed your head from his chest again, earning a head tilt from him in return. Patting his jacket pocket, your own head tilted to the side.

"V- I mean, Jihyun, what's this in your pocket? It's... slightly vibrating," you asked, watching as he stuck his hand in there to find out himself. He didn't remember his phone being in that pocket...

The both of you shared a gasp as you looked at the small compass laying in his palm, the needle spinning in frantic circles the closer your own hand got to the device. The moment your fingers grazed the metal cylinder, it dissipated into thin air, both you and Jihyun watching it leave his hand. He looked up at you with his eyes wide, his mouth slightly hanging open in disbelief. You looked into his eyes before smiling, reaching into your pocket to pull out your own, holding it out to him with your eyes full of love. You were completely ready to combine the two halves of your souls, right then and there and he was so overwhelmed with emotions that tears started to stream down his face, only to break when they hit his smile. He slowly extended his hand to lay it over the compass, feeling it dissipate and he gently held onto your hand, leaning forward to place a kiss between your eyes.

"I wouldn't have expected this, MC. I always believed in natural love, finding my true soulmate always came second," he started, looking at your hands, beginning to interlace his fingers with your own, "But now that I've gotten a taste of what it's like to find the one just for me, I understand why people look for their other half. You are my heaven. You are my clarity in this world," he looked into your eyes hoping to convey just how much he already loved you with the emotions in his own before he brought his face closer, looking between your eyes and you lips, only fully leaning in to place a loving kiss to your lips once he saw you lean into him.

"You, MC, are the only thing I'm going to see for the rest of my life, and I've never been happier to have finally followed the right direction."

Masterlist

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blazehedgehog · 7 years

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With the recent EGX demo and the reception it's got from fans and critics, do you think there's reason to worry, at least for the Switch version and, since I can't think of a way to put it nicely, has the overly defensive tone some fans taken towards critics who've played the game, or even criticized it, been just or unjust? I know Sonic has this maligned reputation with game journos, but it's not like every person who's been critical are haters looking to take Sonic down.

I think a lot of Sonic fans wear some very deep scars. Many have stuck it out through some pretty dark times, myself included. You learn to put up some pretty strong defenses. You make it easy for yourself to dismiss opinions that don’t line up with what you want of expect. “IGN never knew what they were talking about, so why trust what they have to say about Sonic?”

Plus, there’s a very weird growing distrust of games media right now. It started with Gamergate, I guess. It goes without saying, but GG was an awful hate group actively centered around misogyny (or worse), and it’s a shame how many people did not realize that immediately. But that’s the thing: GG tapped into something that was also real. It did so purely by accident; under the surface, Gamergate was nothing more than an ex-boyfriend getting revenge for being slighted by his lover, and it snowballed out of control into something some are calling the new culture wars, and we’re still feeling its effects today.

But part of the reason GG originally gained momentum in the first place is because there’s an underlying distrust of any and every major games media outlet. Kotaku sucks, Polygon sucks, Destructoid sucks, Giantbomb sucks, GameSpot sucks, IGN sucks, Game Informer sucks, CVG sucks, Famitsu sucks, EGM sucked, 1UP sucked, GamePro sucked, Gamefan sucked, PLAY Magazine sucked, GameSpy sucked. Trust no one. The truth is out there. GG connected to those people who were basically waiting for any kind of “game press injustice” to rally behind, because they essentially hated all of the industry’s biggest, most important names.

Where does that come from? I mean, I guess, at least for me, is that once these places lose my trust, it’s basically impossible for it to be regained. And every outlet, at least once in their careers, has a moment that betrays that trust. Where personal interests or even financial interests outstrip the reader’s interests. Trust is so valuable and so fragile that even a single bad editor can spoil a site forever. Even if that person gets fired, the damage they caused can haunt the site’s brand basically forever. Why would I trust IGN? Hilary Goldstein worked there. I think I disagreed with everything that man ever wrote. Why would I trust Polygon? Ben Kuchera writes for them. He said Mario Kart 8 would be the worst selling Mario Kart of all time, when it was probably the single biggest sales driver for the Wii U until Zelda came along. And so on.

This isn’t even touching stuff like Kotaku’s advertising, where they dedicate whole weeks of coverage to a single game because they are paid to do so, which always ends on a glittering review. Even if the review is written honestly, the frame around it places doubt on and hurts that honesty, which above all else should be protected first and foremost.

And I think the thing that really crystallizes all of this is that once an outlet has this happen to them, where they betray someone’s trust, they never, ever, EVER make even a single iota of effort to rebuild that trust. They move on, they bury it, and it’s just assumed that the person yelling in the comments about bias is just “another crazy fanboy.” It turns into this kind of war – the scorned fan in the comments section who obviously still likes the site enough to hang around versus the person employed by the site parroting a “never read the comments” mantra while also repeatedly insulting the very same people they’ve scorned (actually some of their most dedicated fans) just for cheap laughs.

And so the fanboy’s bitterness grows. Salt in an open wound that never really heals.

It’s turning into a serious problem. Maybe there’s no turning back now. It’s that moment in the opening scene of Pixar’s The Incredibles where (spoilers until the end of this paragraph) Mr. Incredible stops the bank robber but the kid, Buddy, gets in the way. Mr. Incredible scolds him for it, and we as the audience think, “That’s right, the kid shouldn’t be there.” Rejected by his hero, Buddy then grows up to become a super villain, channeling that bitterness into a force to kill Mr. Incredible and permanently destroy his entire culture.

“Little guys” like Videogamedunkey, with nearly 4 million Youtube subscribers, are being treated as the new voice of the people. Dunkey has actively attacked what he called “limp dick game journalists” for not doing what he thinks is their job. Dunkey makes some good points against these journalists, even if he does cross some lines, but overall, the message he’s sending is that sympathy for traditional game press has run out. And Dunkey will probably not be the last big name to launch a direct attack against these establishments. They grew up reading these outlets, got burned by some type of distrust, and were constantly told their feelings of betrayal didn’t matter. And now, as these big establishments begin to show signs of weakness in the face of individuals on Youtube, guys like Dunkey are throwing all of that stored up bitterness right back in their faces. As it turns out, not every betrayed fan in the comments section will remain a faceless raging nobody forever. You might not be reading the comments section, but the comments section reads you.

Anyway, getting back to your original message, do I think some people are going overboard with their Sonic Forces hatred? Maybe. Also tying back into what I was just talking about, there is a tendency on the internet to go overboard. With so many voices speaking in unison, in order to be heard, you have to speak REALLY loudly. It’s not enough to simply communicate with friends, some people are competing for reblogs, retweets, likes, thumbs and favs. The loudest, rudest fan is just trying to be heard above the background noise. That’s why you’ve seen this trend, time and time again, where a person will meet their biggest internet heckler in person and they turn out to be nothing. Some of them just want to be acknowledged. So yeah, there are definitely people out there trying to be as loud as possible, hoping somebody will listen to them.

But here’s the deal: I’m not one of those people, and I think there’s a lot about Sonic Forces that’s worrying. As worrying if not more than Sonic Lost World was. It definitely doesn’t look like the successor to Sonic Generations people were hoping for. From what they’ve shown us, I think this looks pretty blatantly like another game where Sonic Team is flying blind and hoping they can stick the landing. I don’t blame anyone who thinks they won’t.

#questions #sonic the hedgehog #sega #sonic team #game journalism #gamergate #dunkey #videogamedunkey #youtube #kotaku #polygon #Anonymous

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supersoulfulnature23 · 4 years

Text

Ever been in a relationship that continues to have this recycled atmosphere.

Iike, no matter how many “talks, heart to hearts and understandings” you go through, it’s the same ol problems being polished out every time.

But it’s a consistent never changing conversation. The same problems.

I don’t feel ... “Heard”

Everything about my essence, my being, who I am, what I enjoy & what makes me happy constantly dismissed because it isn’t “important” enough to him. It never comes close to the “bigger plan”

Therefore for him, my reality, is irrelevant.

When telling him I enjoy sharing things with him, because frankly he’s my only friend, his response is “I’m not your fucking girlfriend”

Yet I’m supposed to be excited about things that make him happy.

But this is the same man who has said that I’m a terrible excuse of a woman, called me a bitch (on a number of occasions I may add), also discredited me as a mother. My entire livelihood he’s attacked.

When we first met, I thought he was amazing. We had so much in common. Hell, we even showed up to the first date wearing the same color shirt lol I mean that was a good sign.

We moved very fast. You see, my living situation wasn’t ideal. I had just moved to Texas from Missouri I did have a job but I was sleeping on a friends couch. By that time it just seemed as I was overstaying my welcome.

So I moved in with him. Things were rocky from there. I had a vehicle, he didn’t. I helped with bills and food anything I could help with. Went through a few jobs but I never had trouble finding one. At one point I worked 2 everyday of the week and weekends sometimes.

Few months into it, I met his family friends, they all loved me. Guess I passed the test.

But then shortly, things changed. Truthfully, I had always had trust issues. So I’d find myself going through his phone and tablet and find that he’d been in contact with many of his exes and still on dating sites. He didn’t like that I went through his phone. Anyway, time went on.

One day while I was at work, I sent him a cute meme about us. He responded by basically breaking up with me, telling me he was rekindling with his ex. Then proceeds to tell me I need to find another place to live.

Of course I’m hurt, livid etc etc but not only that he told me through a text message. I had no place to go. I guess he didn’t want to be labeled an asshole so I ended up staying. Somehow being the dummy I am we continued to mess around. Then we ended up getting back together..briefly. Because he again broke up with me, talking to his ex, kicking me out yet AGAIN lol this cycle happened at least 2 or 3 more times.

So we decided after the lease was up to go our separate ways.

But then out of the blue, he brings me to his friends house and says he needs to talk to me.

He proceeds to say he wants us to move in with his friend, we split the rent 3 ways, so it’s about 250 each. Sounds great right. Anyway he then says he wants to work on us. (I’m guessing him and ex didn’t work out). And being a dummy yet again. I fell for it. I believed it.

So we move in. We’re happy for awhile. Things are great.

Things again change. He then accuses me of cheating. Making quips here and there about me cheating while at work. (I worked for cleaning companies btw with 99% of women) Then accuses me of flirting with his friend. Goes through my phone( doesn’t find shit btw). The first time he called me bitch was at this apartment. He also spent Valentines Day with his friends and drank that night. Of course he always came back and apologized. And I always forgave him. Like an idiot.

I wasn’t perfect. We had screaming matches. I gave him cold shoulders. I’m not particularly lovey dovey, but that’s just who I am as a person. I didn’t grow up in an affectionate environment. I definitely had communication problems. I had trust issues made my own mistakes but I never treated him the way he treated me.

Unbeknownst to me he’s still in contact with his ex. They still have access to one another. Then I found a notebook that was strictly about his ex. Basically about how much he loves her etc etc.

We argue pretty much every week at this point.

We fight. We fix it. We fight. We fix it.

Then boom. We find out I’m pregnant. Whew. It gets worse. The relationship and dynamic between him me and our roommate changes when our roommate ends up disrespecting my mother and me. (That’s another story for another day lol)So we end up moving into our own place.

We ended up getting a new car( I’ll add I paid $1700 down payment for it) and a little over $600 for deposit on our new place. After awhile I sell my car because of mechanical issues we just couldn’t afford to fix at the time. But it all worked out. And I’m not working any longer. Due to the pregnancy and of course Covid19.

Same ol cycle. Things were good at first. But then as expected. Things changed. He starts to resent me for not working. Bills are piling and we’re both stressed.

But let me add. When I found out I was pregnant he made a point to tell me he doesn’t want me to work. That I could depend on him. Hell take care of the bills. I trust him.

That made things worse. Hormones, and this kind of foundation. And living paycheck to paycheck.

After one of our biggest blowouts, I ended up sleeping in my car when I was 5 months pregnant at one point. He pointed out I had no leg to stand on, and he’d take me to court for our daughter. How quickly he forgot, how much I helped him when he had nothing. That we had the new car and new place solely because of me. I stayed away from the house for days.

We also got everything for our baby because of me. The crib, car seat, clothing, swings and bouncers, you know big ticket items, I had gotten. He didn’t have to pay for. Hell I didn’t pay for majority of it. Most of it was gifted. And I always followed groups on Facebook for free stuff and I always found great stuff. I’m just super thrifty okay lol if we can save big money why not. You see, I made a point to get things for the baby, for the house and for us because I wanted to take stress off him. Pretty much everything in our new place minus, our bed, dresser and table, we had because of me. Yet he always claims in anger that I contribute nothing. Also let me add groceries are my responsibility as well. And we always have food.

He just never acknowledges anything I’ve done, because in his mind it doesn’t match up to what he does.

Let me also add I have a 6 year old son from a previous relationship. He moves to Texas with me this upcoming weekend. And I’m just scared.

We’re adding children to this toxic environment and I don’t know what to do at this point.

With my being pregnant it’s been hard to find work but also adding that the Covid19 crisis is still very much prevalent right now, I don’t know my options.

I don’t have family to depend on, no friends I can stay with so I’m pretty much on my own. Per usual.

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bewarethewolfarmy · 7 years

Note

literally.. you missed out the entire meaning of the post dear. i played a whole damn lot of original characters and canon characters, i seen a lot. generally, if an oc has a faceclaim that it's over-used, they are 'bonkers; or 'only copying other ocs with that face' but if some canon character uses the same fancast all over again it's ok. if a canon character becomes canon divergent, it is a good thing, but if an oc changes something in their bio they are deemed 'not stable characterization'

(First thanks for telling me XD It’s always good to know what people honestly mean when they write something and I prefer to not make asumptions but it can be hard. Also this topic is one I think about a lot and getting different opinions is important to get a stronger view of it.

Based on my own personal experience as an online roleplayer for thirteen years, this is my point of view and why I disagree with the assessment in your post. Read-more for length:

-“ generally, if an oc has a faceclaim that it's over-used, they are 'bonkers; or 'only copying other ocs with that face' but if some canon character uses the same fancast all over again it's ok.” While there are some faceclaims that are used very often, primarily based off of the popularity of the faceclaim themselves, the actual hate I at least have seen those muns get over their faceclaims is not based off of being “bonkers” or “only copying others”. I don’t think I’ve ever seen anyone be called crazy for having a faceclaim; if you have then a) I am so sorry you have had to deal with that and b) it might be important to recognize that not all fandoms are created alike. While MANY are full of assholes (ex-Classic Who fandomer and watcher of the madhouse that is Gotham fandom), many also do not go into a screaming fit about a faceclaim. As long as they are live action if a live action fandom/animated if it’s an animated fandom; now THAT, considering my primary muse had an anime based faceclaim because of an unique aspect of hers, is something I know that fandoms do in shades and will scream about for ocs while also accepting a canon who happens to use an animated faceclaim because they happen to BE Animated (Shalka Master/Doctor was a huge example; I as a DW-primary oc got a lot of hate and dismissal and advice to “change my faceclaim” because my fc was Kanra from Durarara, meanwhile Shalka Doctor was accepted and still loved though because it’s a short ANIMATED episode set has to have animated icons (despite being heavily physically based on his voice actor Richard E. Grant and thus under the same laws should have been made to use his face instead)). I have since changed my fc because I got tired of being hated on for being “a cartoon”. But once more, I really have never seen any oc in any of the massive amount of fandoms I follow (I highlight because I recognize that I do not follow all and I do not see all and there might be many accounts of it; I simply talk on the level of what I see and know of as a roleplayer) and interact with (being a temporal/dimensional traveler is always useful for making new friends) be hated on for being a popular/over-used fc. In addition I’d like to point out that canons do get hurt by using the same faceclaim because that goes into the idea that “all canons are alike” and thus can make the roleplayer feel replaceable because they are for instance an Oswald Cobblepot using Robin’s face but there’s like ten or fifteen others and they are suddenly not special enough to pay much attention to

-”if a canon character becomes canon divergent, it is a good thing, but if an oc changes something in their bio they are deemed 'not stable characterization'“ I would like to bring up once again my canon character Robert James Finn also known as RJ and the argument I still have to have about him being a druggie. I don’t know why I have to do this but I have to constantly remind people that no, RJ does not smoke weed, he is not high, my headcanon for him is as someone who is naturally a bit loopy and immensely intelligent; he admits himself that he often talks the way he does to confuse his enemies which denotes to me someone who recognizes the usefulness of acting a part and his part is the man who no one suspects. Now I don’t get straight hate but does everyone respect my choice in having RJ not do drugs and make sure to actually keep that in mind talking to him? No. And in general “canon divergence” is a very weird term; canon by nature is highly about interpretation. For example: The Doctor and Master. There is many interactions between them since the introduction of Delgado!Master back during Jon Pertwee’s era and especially then the relationship is shown to be a very give and take. There is many points, then and throughout time, where you could say that the Master at the very least is in love with the Doctor and even argue that the Doctor does share this feeling; the famous Mind of Evil “You were within an inch of dying” scene is one of the best examples of evidence for this. BUT similarly there are other interpretations to this; the Master could simply be a sociopath not wishing to lose his best “toy” for example. Which is canon? I have most of my muses as non-hetero, Merrick Baliton being the biggest example; Merrick canonically has never shown interest in boys, only being in love with the princess Shayla, yet mine has fallen in love with and been with multiple males, primarily males at this point. Merrick would be canon divergent and I have no doubt that there are multiple people who dislike my Merrick, my Dillon, my RJ, my Riley, my Bigby (who goes completely against his canon love for Snow by not having her be his True Love like in the comics), my Karone/Astronema, my Sarah or any of my companions’ own interpretations of their muses; people may not be as vocal about it but the fact of the matter is that it does happen. (added while writing the oc portion after this) I can name at least one very good example of an canon who is HIGHLY divergent and has not been allowed to get away scotfree over it; the mun plays an underaged muse from a certain Disney movie involving superheroes and plays them in an incredibly sexualized and discomforting way, to the point that my talking about canon divergence being interpretative? Yeah that doesn’t apply to this guy. His muse regularly from others I have seen gets called out on the disgusting behavior the mun has him engage in and is not dismissed as okay and while there are those who do roleplay with them, I would note that while following them (because I rarely unfollow) I have never seen any of the other muses from his fandom so much as come near him. He is a pariah in his own fandom.

As for ocs being seen as not having stable characterisation, this I can understand but once more I debate the idea that it is so much more rampant than with canons. There are cases in which a mun might change things because they decided they found an easier or simplier way to explain it or because of pressure because of a variety of things (Mary Sue accusations, peer pressure, trigger issues, further education that ended up contradicting something, or simply because their muse did not agree with the mun’s interpretation and they didn’t find out until during a roleplay which has happened to me a lot and is fucking annoying, muses, stop it); these I think are generally accepted, primarily because the change makes sense or the mun explains what they did and why. Now once more fandom-may-vary but even within the DW fandom (which is my go-to “WHAT THE FUCK” fandom in terms of treatment of members by members) a change when it fits well with the character is seen with a grain of salt but does not cause an explosive blowup. On the other hand there are incidents in which yes, there is bad or unstable characterisation; it is almost always bad roleplayers who are creating characters without care to actually making them something to roleplay with. You know the type and no, it’s very rarely the ones who actually get called out about it; it’s weird but they almost always also get away with it because they find people who don’t really care and just want to roleplay with them. They constantly change their muses and while occasional change is something we expect (all muses and all mun change with time), the sheer number of changing is often the bigger issue. Having a character that you cannot keep track of what their past is, not because they have none but because the mun every day or so is changing something, can make for problem in interacting, especially when you are trying to discuss important points about the muse and work through issues and grief but the traumas keep changing or disappearing completely. Stable characterisation in general tends to be a difficult thing to do at times and if someone does throw around the term “unstable characterisation” at an oc, then it’s perfectly right to throw back at them two words: “the Joker”. Then move on because that clown should and can shut down ANY argument about bio changes and characterisation. Just say your oc is the Joker and laugh your head off.

In closing, basically: I do believe OCs have it inherently worse than canons. There are prejudices against them, ranging from not liking the wording of the about page to disliking a specific faceclaim because it’s a person you hate/animated/too attractive/not attractive enough to fearing a pre-established relationship if their about does include mentionings of your muse to not feeling comfortable with certain genders/sexualities to just plain not liking ocs. OCs by nature do have to work harder to get seen and to get people to want to roleplay with them since they don’t have the “advantage” of brand recognition that most canons do. But canons have it tough too, having to deal with whether or not they have the right headcanons, whether or not they are one of a million or one of a kind, whether their primary fandom is tiny or large, whether or not they ship the right ships and hate the ones others hate, whether their faceclaim is okay to use or not, whether they are too divergent or just divergent enough. Canons have to make themselves seen too especially when there are a lot of the same ones. Canons have to work on their bios to explain who they are, why they are the way they are, fill in the gaps and explain the nuances so that they can shine as a character of their own instead of just “Cersei Lannister” or “Newt Scamander” or “Heckyl of Sentai Six” or “Jan Kandou”. All the things you bring up, while I haven’t witnessed any of that sort of stuff, I have no doubt is not just oc problems when I see canons on a regular basis being bashed because their Loki isn’t “right” or their Ivy and Jervis are in a relationship and it goes against the other person’s perception of those characters or their Kimberly is a little too open with her love or their Dean is too out there or because they have a muse that is traditionally straight but in their version is not.)

#long post #about ocs and canons #all the semi-specific examples I gave are real ones I have seen #ones I have witnessed and watched unfold #honestly though #I do appreciate the commentary and addition of other experiences #I just wanted to debate it based on what I myself have experienced and witnessed and feel #lionsire

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