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bloodgulchblog · 2 months

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I have no jokes for you this morning.

S2E06.

We start off with a group of Spartan-IIIs engaged in a simulation training exercise to board and take down a Covenant ship.

We find out that it's a training simulation because they get pulled out of the dumb VR zoom call technology from last season (y'all remember that? I barely did) and Kai tells them how they fucked up and that they need to be more like a swarm of bees when they're in space to not get shot.

Insanely, one of these trainees is apparently Perez.

We also get a ton of these in-helmet face shots I hate.

While Halsey and the Gang have been busy on Aleria, Spartan-III is.... proceeding with a bunch of adults who survived Reach.

Apparently.

I feel like anyone reading this post has been here long enough to understand my annoyance without my efforts to belabor the point. Maybe I'll get agitated enough to make a whole post out of it later.

But this also feels like the kind of thing a writer does when they've heavily foreshadowed something (the Kessler subplot, whatever the fuck was up with Ackerson having a dead sister clone) but want to make you think you didn't see it coming, so I am expecting we are not out of the child soldier woods yet.

You know how it is.

The children yearn for the child soldier woods.

Anyway, there's a ~thing~ with her and Kai where Kai clearly doesn't like her and Kai's like "I don't have a problem with you I have a problem with failure" while Perez is all YOU'RE JUST MAD YOU WEREN'T THERE AT REACH.

Anyway there's this fucking amazing line after Perez says she "knows what she signed up for."

Then, we cut to Parangosky and Twinkerson having a conversation about ONI (sorry, THE ONI), tea, stories, and empire because of course.

But actually, the point of the conversation is that Parangosky has heard someone snuck a ship through their security protocols and landed nearby, and also she has heard from a source that Halsey is probably alive.

And was seen traveling with a huge scarred man on a ship of the same description.

God dammit, roll the title sequence.

I've survived the first 10 minutes without needing to spit 30 images at you so you can understand my anguish, so maybe things are looking up.

Sort of.

For now.

God I need to fucking know how bad the Spartan-IIIs actually are because this is already so stupid.

Luckily, Halo show is going to leave that Jimmy Rings teaser alone for now. Hop over to Kai and Ackerson.

Kai has been using the VR zoom call software to make herself more miserable about how she wasn't at the battle of Reach by simming herself there, and Ackerson is calling her out on it. She believes her whole team is dead and she's having a very bad time.

She is not confident about the Spartan-III trainees. She says they're not Spartans.

Ackerson is like lol well that's your problem, they are Spartans...

10/10 #1 best boss of the year award.

OKAY NOW we get to go see Halsey and the gang, who are of course on Onyx.

Halsey casually does not explain her plan. Kwan wanders off into the woods and starts hallucinating the spooky woman again while Soren and Jimmy talk about how Onyx is a ~mysterious planet~ with ONI history or something, and how Laera and Soren want to go find/rescue Kessler.

Kessler is somewhere in that building, they think.

Security forces show up and they fight armorless Jimmy in the snow in a scene that Paramount Halo probably thinks looks cool but I just thought looked very silly.

Kwan follows her vision and jumps down a well, which we find out has weird Forerunner Stuff at the bottom and Halsey is already there.

Halsey apparently used to work here 20 years ago.

The funniest thing about the sequence is she credits meeting Kwan specifically for how Jimmy Rings stopped behaving "like a Spartan," which feels super un-earned because of how quickly season 1 separated these characters and how little they ultimately actually seemed to mean to one another. Kwan is about as bewildered as I am with it.

Then, we have THE MOST HILARIOUS SEQUENCE IN THE SHOW TO ME SO FAR.

Okay.

Setting the stage for you.

Lovingly fighting with how tumblr won't let me upload two videos in one post.

Remember this cutscene with me, how they show us the Arbiter's punishment, how it feels to watch that.

youtube

Remember it? Love it? Good.

Here's what we get in Halo TV Show.

[EDIT: tumblr had its chance to host this but I think it thinks it's content matched, porn, or both. So. Youtube.]

youtube

The prosecution is wheezing. The prosecution rests.

(And by that I mean I should probably go eat something besides bad tv show for breakfast.)

#halo tv spoilers #s2 liveblogging #paramount halo negative #god i'm fucking dying #Youtube

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alrightbuckaroo · 1 month

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okay i am so intrigued but all!! but as an avid horror fan tell me about the horror novelist!!

Hello Rachel!

Sadly there isn't nearly as much horror that the description might suggest, but Carlos is an up and coming horror novelist who nannies in New York! He works for neurosurgeon Gregory Hughes and looks over his two gremlins turned angels, Lydia and Ryan.

One day Ryan, for some reason, has a cat in his backpack and the cat escapes and climbs up a tree in Central Park. After finding out the cat belongs to the son of a New York senator, Carlos realizes he has no choice but to get it. Alas, he gets STUCK; thank god there's a super hot fireman who can help him down :)

Here's a little snippet that I've shared before but I left out the funniest part so I'm sharing it again:

“Ryan, you’ve got one more chance before I fix this myself.” “How?” Ryan squawks from the other end of the fountain, his dirty blond hair looking more chestnut than golden due to the water that’s drenched it. “You don’t know how to swim.” Carlos’ eyes cut to his sister as she chuckles, his face reflecting that of brotherly frustration. Luisa rolls her eyes before saying, “Look, I already apologized for telling him you can’t swim, what more do you want from me?” “I want you to not encourage it,” Carlos replies as he swings one leg over the lip of the fountain. He turns towards the teenage girl who’s posed with her phone in hand, stood in a fashion that implies she’s recording. “And I want you, Lydia,” Carlos continues, waiting until Lydia makes it clear she’s heard him. “To stop filming me for Tic Tac.” “It’s TikTok,” Lydia corrects, her overly glossed pink lips pursing in disgust. Her father has recently given her leeway to experiment with make-up as long as it doesn’t cost over ten dollars, isn’t red and doesn’t have a name like ‘Better than Sex’. “Whatever,” Carlos argues, yelping when his bare foot makes contact with the cold fountain water. “I’m your nanny, not your content.”

ask me about my poorly described wips!

#i keep saying this one feels like spring if that makes any sense #get ready for the most rom-com of shenanigans let me tell you that #the title comes from accidentally in love by counting crows like we're going IN ‼️#thanks so much for the ask <3 #asked and answered

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ghostysfics · 2 years

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| Almost | Tommy Slater x Gender Neutral Reader

warnings: spoilers for Fear Street: 1978, descriptions of gore/violence, angst, cursing, death, Tommy + Cindy are friends in this au!, bad writing?

Summary under the gif ⬇️

summary: what if the reader confessed after Nurse Lane's attack? the "almost lovers" trope :(, for this fic

Breathe. Don't look behind you. Just keep moving.

You gasp with every step, running as fast as you can. You couldn't believe this was happening.

The curse — it had to be real — there was no other explanation for what happened.

Don't think about the blood. Don't think about the way it covered Tommy's usually smiling face. Don't think about the sound of the axe meeting Arnie's face. Don't think about the screams.

—Flashback to earlier that day—

You're tense, sitting close to Tommy after Nurse Lane's attempt to murder him. Cindy sits on the other side.

"I thought I'd lost you there for a second," You finally manage to get out. The memory of the knife almost making contact with Tommy's chest was too fresh in your mind.

"I thought she had me too," He whispers, still looking shaken, but could you blame him? Tommy was thinking about what Nurse Lane had said to him. What did it mean?

"Tommy," You find yourself saying, surprised by your own boldness, "I.." You wanted to tell him. You wanted to make sure he knew how much you cared. Cindy makes eye contact and takes the hint. She offers an excited smile before walking over to where Alice and Arnie were.

"Y/n..?" He turns to face you.

"I like you a lot," You close your eyes after you've said it because you're expecting rejection.

"Y-You do?" He looks at you, shocked. Tommy's eyes search your own. You had no idea how long he'd been wanting to hear this.

"I'm sorry I just dropped that on you— especially after what just happened," You're speaking quickly, everything you'd been thinking of the past week was spilling from your mouth, "— You've made camp so much greater for me. I mean you're the sweetest and funniest guy I've ever met. I can see how all the campers look up to you. I appreciate our friendship and I'll understand if you don't feel the same.. I just don't want to lose you, and I thought I did today.."

"Y/n," He repeats, leaning towards you, "I like you too. In fact, I've liked you for a while." You reach forward and take his trembling hands in yours. Tommy's smile is contagious.

"Since Color War is tonight, could we go on a date tomorrow?" He slightly cringes at himself, knowing he couldn't take you on an actual date until summer camp was over. To you, it was everything you've dreamed of.

"I'd love to."

—————

You'd been running for ages. Your legs and side are aching from the stress. Tommy was close behind, his breathing labored and heavy. You hoped that Alice and Cindy were able to find a way out of that tunnel. You had only captured a glimpse of the room with the Witches' Mark. You had been trapped on the other side with Tommy. You had only managed to scrape past him and tear your way through the woods. You heard other counselors yelling for the kids to stop the game, and return to the mess hall. Tommy comes to a halt behind you. You turn to watch as he makes his way towards the campers. Your mind went to the kids you had been mentoring over the summer.

You think of the blood. All the blood you'd seen tonight, and there would be more if you didn't do anything.

"Tommy!" You shriek, regaining his attention, "That's right! Over here! Follow me!" You turn, listening to him following you, "Shit!" You'd been running on adrenaline alone - the fear and sadness had a tight grip on you. You hadn't had any real time to process what had become of Tommy. Your mind wanders to the conversation you held with him earlier that day.

SLASH!

A searing pain jolts through your body as he swings at your back. You tumble to the ground when it makes contact. You immediately start screaming in pain. It feels like slow motion when he swings again.

You almost made it.

"No! No!" You panic and try to clamber away from him. His face is covered in crimson liquid, it soaks his hair and his shirt. "Tommy," Your chest heaves with the effort, ice cold fear gripping you completely. All you can say is his name. You know that it isn't his fault. You know that he can't control himself, but you're scared. Your hand instinctively goes to your injuries, you feel the slickness of your own blood. "Tommy!"

For a moment it seems like you cut through to him. He stops, his eyes widen, and he looks around in fear. Tommy stares at the axe in his hands.

"Y/n?" He asks, his voice shaky.

"Tommy," You breathe in relief, wincing in pain as you try to move towards him, "Tommy?"

"No no.." He sounds like he is going to be sick, "D-Did I? — Did I do this to you?" Tommy crouches down, looking from your e/c eyes to your wounds. He's overwhelmed with the possibility that he hurt you. Your breathing wavers with each breath and you can taste blood.

Despite this you say, "Y-You still owe me a date remember?" Tommy huffs softly, his heart brightening at the fact you were okay enough to crack a joke.

"I need to patch you up first —" He starts grabbing his flannel to place over your wounds, but the fog of possession takes him once more. It was much too late for you to move. You knew there wasn't anything you could do. The darkness was already clouding your vision. You tried to remember the boy who never failed made you smile, the one who gave you a hug whenever you needed it, you tried to remember Thomas Slater.

Then there was the axe.

SPLATTER!

You thought of what you two could've been before it all went dark.

(Sorry for this one guys - ghostysfics 💛)

#tommy slater #tommy slater x reader #fear street part 2: 1978 #thomas slater x reader #thomas slater #fear street x reader #fear street fanfic

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georgebbwbush · 8 months

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i think the funniest description of the nation of islam's beliefs that i've heard is "Mormonism for Islam"

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massalk2 · 1 year

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Throughout the months of April and May of 2022, the defamation trial between Johnny Depp and Amber Heard had taken place in front of the whole world. Depp sued Heard for defamation after she wrote an “opposite the editorial page” (Op-ed) on the Washington post titled “I spoke up against sexual violence - and faced our culture’s wrath. That has to change.” In that op-ed, she talked about sexual and domestic abuse that she experienced as a child but also in romantic relationships. She did not mention Johnny Depp. The trial was made public for the whole world to see.

It is generally believed that this trial made it possible for men to speak up about domestic abuse, however, I think the only thing it did was reinforce misogyny and further silence victims.

I have been on social media during the trial and everybody was talking about it. Compilations on youtube about “the best moments” or “funniest moments” of this trial received more and more views, and especially on the platform “Tiktok” the harassment against Amber Heard was the harshest I've seen a celebrity receive after getting “cancelled”. Short videos of her crying when testifying (in front of the whole world) about sexual abuse or rape she received from her ex-husband Depp were published with circus music in the background, “body language experts” (even though it is not an actual thing) all over the world calling her testimony acting and suspicious. People in the comments, did not deny Depp’s alleged sexual abuse on his ex-wife, instead, they “didnt see what he did wrong here” and “they wished that was them”. I, personally, was shocked by how the public acted when it came to Heard’s testimony on alleged sexual abuse: let’s imagine that she really was lying, it was still a description of rape, not just a normal intercouse, so those comments I read about rape, were disgusting to me, and i can't even imagine how rape victims felt reading comments romanticising such important accusations, just because the perpetrator is a famous actor. The way the general public reacted to violence and especially sexual violence shows that our culture has no problem and is ready to diminish and make fun of women’s traumatic experiences, more so if they are caused by powerful men.

Besides, Heard’s testimonies would be cut into short videos, would be edited with a written caption distorting her meaning and would be published. Us, users of the internet, would see the video cut, edited and out of context, and assume she really is crazy. In fact, by the end of April, she was already the narcissist, manipulative, abusive, money-hungry witch while Johnny Depp was this brave man who built up the courage to finally break his silence and face his abuser, who is very true to himself and innocent because he comes to court in sunglasses and eats candies.

When the verdict came out on June 1st, it was like Amber Heard’s death sentence was pronounced: she was humiliated in front of the world, and petitions asking for her removal from the movie she starred in “Aquaman” got millions of signatures.

A few months later, Brad PItt is suing Angelina Jolie and people are already taking his side, Evan Rachel Wood’s complaints are being questioned, even though it was already proven that she was abused in every way possible by her long-term ex boyfriend Marilyn Manson who dated her when she was 18 while he was 37, but his image got better because he is Johnny Depp’s best friend and everyone loves Johnny Depp. So it is safe to say that the Metoo movement has died because any woman speaking up now is accused of wanting to destroy the man’s life and career and faces diffamation complaints from her abuser.

What I noticed is that women are held accountable for actions they did and actions they didn't do, and are made fun of whether they're abused or abusive.

The petition of Amber Heard getting removed from her movie got millions of votes while a Chris Brown song was trending at the same time. Chris Brown was proven guilty of abusing and being violent against his ex-girlfriend Rihanna, but everybody still listens to his songs, in fact, jokes are made everyday about Rihanna being abused. Other people still defend that we should separate the man from the artist, defending the fact that abusers should still have a career despite their actions, however women's careers are destroyed for being victims.

In conclusion, my opinion is that the Depp v Heard trial should have never been public because it was treated like a reality show, and the way the general public reacted to it has made it easier now, not only to discredit women’s experiences and trauma, but also keep any other (female) victim from speaking out, fearing that she may be publicly humiliated and see her life shatter right in front of her. Amber said after the trial that she has never felt more removed from her humanity, and i completely understand her feelings, even I, who was on no one’s side during the trial, was shocked by the comments I read and videos I’ve seen of not only how she was not treated in a human way but also how grown people were threatening to kill her one-year-old daughter.

#justice for amber heard #i stand with amber heard #amber heard #depp vs heard #feminism

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drifting-pieces-blog-blog · 7 months

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Breaking Down the Comics: Fighting the dead.

Moon Knight, Issue 21: The Master of Night Earth / Murder by Moonlight

It's officially spooky time and have I got a Moon Knight comic double feature cross over event for you!

The first one features Brother Voodoo! A lot of you probably have no idea who that is. I used to sit in that boat too. (Marvel is not good at keeping up with their characters until they think they can suddenly make them popular or make money off them).

In fact, Brother Voodoo was once Sorcerer Supreme many years ago when Strange 'retired'. (See 'Search for the Sorcerer Supreme'. A good event that I really enjoyed in which all of Marvel's magical characters got featured).

Firstly, look at that beautiful cover! I’m a sucker for black and white and rough style drawings.

Alright!

So we open up in a port in Haiti. Moon Knight's fighting some gun runners when suddenly a specter appears to join the fight.

The thugs all run!

"It is him! The disciple of Papa Jambo!! Brother Voodoo! His spirit has come to fill our hearts with fire!"

(Moon Knight is no newbie when it comes to Voodoo. He's faced down things like this before in a previous issue.)

"Well, whatever you are, pal, you sure put the Kibosh on these thugs. They're runnin' faster'n a clock at happy hour!"

If that isn't Jake talking I'll eat my hat.

The ghost inhabits one of the running goons and forces the goon to turn and take a stab at Moon Knight.

Moon Knight socks it to him and accidentally knocks the goon and ghost off the pier and into an escaping speed boat.

I think the funniest thing here is that the comic now points out that Moon Knight has a two way mic in his cowl that connects to Frenchie. How often do you think Frenchie sits up there just listening to it all?

While Moon Knight is no Spider-man, he does often talk to 'himself' or have a snippy running commentary.

"Guess ya heard my prize winnin' monologue, Frenchie. The birds've flown, so you might as well bring down the chopper to pick up--Huh? Drums!"

That's right. The sound of drums fill the air and a man appears in a wall of flames.

I think my favorite thing is how much Moon Knight recognizes his poor luck and when things go weird.

Moon Knight has certainly seen his fair share of mystical and weird things so he takes it in stride, of course.

"Who in blazes are you?!"

As meetings go, this is pretty tame. Considering every time Moon Knight meets someone they end up fighting (with one notable exception coming up in another issue).

We get a brief review on who they are. Jericho Drum is Brother Voodoo!

Moon Knight introduces himself, "I'm a lot of things at a lot of different times, Pal, most of 'em based in New York, but before New York, ONE of those things was a mercenary, a soldier for hire. Y'see, I've fought a lot of fights under a lot of flags and identities... But I've probably enjoyed my free agent mercenary experience the most."

An interesting introduction. I take a strong feeling of Jake earlier with the accent and speech patterns. (Not to mention use of the word Kibosh, which is actually not Yiddish, but Irish slang that is often mistaken as yiddish!) Yet, Jake doesn't like to leave New York. He'd rather stay where he is comfortable and has the upper hand.

Here, with the instant description as his old days as a Merc that enjoyed the fight so much that he still does it, one might get the impression it's Marc.

BUT...

"You might say that's what I'm doin' now--What I'm the very best at, and doin' it by way of my identity as a costumed clown. And though I got money to burn--I don't mind pickin' up a little extra cash."

"Then you were paid to come here to Haiti?"

"You might say that, too."

Marc picks up his old job with resistance. He has never been one to jump in the saddle and go out hunting for money. Not anymore.

But there's more:

"I did my homework before acceptin' the assignment, if THAT'S what you mean. Enough to know Im on the side of the angels."

One gets the feeling that Marc is doing what he does best with the prodding of something he needs to do. Perhaps co-fronting with Jake as a sort of protector. Letting Jake run things to keep his spirits up and prevent him from crashing and burning like he did in Israel.

An early sign, perhaps, that they are struggling but learning to work together.

Anyways, back to the story!

Brother Voodoo explains that Haiti has suffered many coup d'etats and there is a current terrorist attempt to take over. He is head of security here and he offers to pay Moon Knight handsomely if he agrees to help stop the latest attempted overthrow.

Brother Voodoo warns him of “Houngans, the lord of the crossroads and demons, master of night earth, night forests, and zuvembies and voodoo.”

Moon Knight first scoffs at the notion of REAL voodoo but then takes pause not to scoff at such things when he saw this man become a sort of ghost first hand.

"The spirit you saw was my slain brother, Daniel." (See Brother Voodoo backstory to find out more! But basically his brother was killed and now acts as a spirit at his side that can inhabit people to help the cause).

Let's back up a moment. Houngans, also known as Oungan in real life Haitian, is a male priest in Haitian Vodou. A powerful man that can work with the spirits.

Moon Knight sends Frenchie off with his chopper to dispose of the stolen munitions they recovered. Meanwhile, Brother Voodoo and he take a boat down the river to track down the escaped speedboat.

Daniel, the spirit brother, has inhabited one of the thugs still and will help guide them to the safehouse.

On the way there, they encounter Zombies on gators!

I’m going to add this informally to my check list of animals Moon Knight has fought. Zombie gators and Zombie snakes. That’s a new one there, Moon Knight buddy.

Brother Voodoo and Moon Knight put up a fight, but it's hard to kill what's already dead.

Just when it seems to be a lost fight, the zombies suddenly start to retreat!

It would seem that the grand leader doesn't yet have full control of the undead.

The zombies head down one direction and Daniel's spirit went down the other. Frenchie shows up and Moon Knight head off to fight the terrorists while Brother Voodoo sets out to track down the zombies.

Marc and Frenchie find a fortress deep in the swamp. Meanwhile, Brother Voodoo comes across a waterfall that comes out just on the other side of the fortress!

Moon Knight attempts to glide in to save him from the waterfall but Voodoo refuses and goes over the edge.

I just want to say how much I ADORE this art right now. It’s the formless features of the face hidden in darkness with the eyes. Old Moon Knight cowl was just amazing and O dig classic costume. LOOK AT IT.

Moon Knight is surrounded by thugs with guns and thinks it might be the end when drums start up again!

Brother Voodoo appears and the ghost of his brother returns while the thugs make a run for it.

The art of surprise is over, but they decide to use stealth to sneak in.

And we all know how Moon Knight does with stealth...

Do I have a crash through the window counter? I really should have started one of those...

He’s such a drama king.

Anyways, if Moon Knight is asking for five minutes alone with a guy, it isn't going to go well for that guy.

Moon Knight confronts the smartly dressed man and demands the rest of his money.

(Does everyone owe him money? Marc what the hell you been doing?)

The man gives Moon Knight the owed money then tells him that Brother Voodoo has joined the terrorists and needs to be taken out.

"No dice, Giscard. I've been paid in full to stop the terrorists, and that's just what I'm gonna do... Startin' with you, the stinkin' leader of the terrorists!"

The man hired Moon Knight to stop terrorists, which were a few sacrificial goons, in order to look good to the government leaders. Meanwhile, he was staging the coup while pretending to be stopping it!

Honestly, Marc should have caught wind of this earlier. I'm sure he's been in charge of MANY coups and run with plenty of warmongers.

He hits a trap button and Moon Knight is shot with a poison dart!

Moon Knight awakens to find himself staring down the villain, now dressed in a new outfit.

"You see, Moon Knight, I play three roles...You have seen me in two of them- as the Government security chief and as the leader of the revolutionary forces seeking to topple that government. But now, you see me in my third and most important role- the Grand Bois, leader of the unholy trinity, lord of the crossroads and demons...The Master of the Night earth and night forests!"

He gives a long convoluted speech explaining how he will soon gain control over death once the full moon has fully risen.

Once he has full control over death he will raise his zombie army to take over Haiti.

During his speech, Moon Knight has slipped his restraints.

Zombies show up again and so does Brother Voodoo.

They fight the zombies and try to shatter the large mcguffin that is helping to control them.

Moon Knight calls in Frenchie with the big guns and he uses the chopper's gunfire to break the mcguffin and send the Zombies back to their graves.

The goons show up and turn on the villain, deciding they are tired of the zombies. Turns out they weren't too happy to see their ancestors turned into zombies.

He offers his pay to Brother Voodoo, seeing how the money came from Haiti’s treasury in the first place.

Let’s give away this bread.

What an interesting crossover.

The implication of Marc working as a Merc again under the guise of Moon Knight, accepting money, to stop a coup. There's a lot going on there. He doesn't need the money. It's just more to toss onto Steven's pile. And I'm Sure Steven would not be thrilled to have to deal with more laundered and ill-be-gotten cash.

And then there's the whole feel that this is NOT Marc, but Jake. But also Marc. Like a combination of the two. Like Marc felt he needed to help a government that he probably at one point help over throw and put into chaos... But he needed someone to oversee him. To do some hand holding to prevent him from reverting to old tactics, flashbacks, or guilt.

Maybe I'm putting too much into it, but after the issues that preceded this one, maybe Marc isn't ready to settle in yet but also is trying to do some good as a Merc but as Moon Knight.

It was also interesting to hear him talk about his other identities and actually refer to Steven as "the other guy".

And there was also a nice counter to the villain being three roles: Government rich guy, Leader of a coup, and then the religious zealot.

Counter that with Steven, Marc, and Jake in their own roles.

Generally when there are cross over issues, it's an effort to get people interested in the other character enough to go look into their comics and start reading those too. So there really is a general light version of both characters without a lot of weight or back story. They don't want to off put people just tuning in with a lot of lore and things you should know.

So the skirting of the Marc vs. his identity as the merc without guilt issue is avoided here. This issue is for Brother Voodoo.

(And you know what? Those tactics work because I got into Moon Knight because of a Moon Knight cross over issues and went "Who the fuck is this guy?!")

BONUS ISSUE! "MURDER BY MOONLIGHT" by Alan Zelenetz.

Oh boy you guys. This is a Khonshu story!

"Under the timeless gaze of the ancient Egytpain god, More than Marc Spector have known the power of Khonshu.... TALES OF KHONSHU"

We open up on a full moon and a city in distress. An officer has been shot killed and the perp is on the loose!

A man named Herb Russell runs through the botanical gardens. The narration paints him as ruthless and a man that won't stand to loose.

Tired of running, he turns to find he's landed at the Brooklyn Museum "where a late evening lecture series is still in progress."

"Hey, if I can cool it a couple of hours in there, then I just leave with the crowd like a respectable citizen - ha!- when it opens in the morning, and no worries."

He sneaks into the museum and into the night lecture being conducted by a famed Egyptologist "Dr. Richard Mark".

He lectures on the benefits of X-rays for examining mummies without having to disturb them or dishonor them.

He explains that he plans to radiograph some more things before the exhibit opens in the morning.

Hmmm... I sense foreshadowing.

Meanwhile, upstairs, Herb Russell is sneaking through the Egyptian exhibit.

"I'll bet this stuff must be worth a lotta dough. I oughta swipe somethin' before I leave."

Ah yes…. The Khonshu statue. ……Wait. How did it get there? It’s supposed to be in the desert waiting for Marc to raise him from the dead. That’s the cloak that Marc streals to make as his own cape. What’s he doing in a museum in Brooklyn?

He's so judgy.

This will end well.

The night guard takes a look around and deems no one there then leaves.

Now, Russell tries to leave the sarcophagus only to find the lid stuck!

' "What is the punishment of the sinner?" Reads the heiroglypic proverb painted along the mummy case... "Evil shall pursue him and the soul which sins shall die." '

Come morning, we seed the Egyptologist prepping for the exhibit and taking radiographs.

Let’s pretend that maybe there are in fact multiple Khonshu statues. There was, after all, a moon cult back in the day when Ra fell out of favor and people decided Khonshu was the way to go. So there may have been more than one statue or temple. So Marc dies at one, takes that statue home. There is another in the museum. Maybe one in London too because London has half of Egypt.

Anyways, Khonshu has always been a judgy dick. Also what a way to go. Spooky, right?

Zombies and scary stories of suffocating in coffins under the judgy gaze of a moon god…. What a way to kick off the spooky season! (this comic came out in July of 1982).

What do you guys think? What about the sudden change in Marc’s behavior in the first part? What about the duplicate statues all over?

#Moon Knight #Moon Knight comics #Analyzing the comics #Marc Spector #Jake Lockley #Steven Grant #Khonshu #Love that 1980s slang #Khonshu has always been a judgy bitch #Brother Voodoo

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kitausuret · 1 year

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Sleepy Dialogue! Going to bed at night number 8: "You're allowed to cuddle me like a teddy bear." for symbiot3. I leave the choice of who is allowed to cuddle the other like a teddy bear up to you <3

I am definitely not replying to this prompt over a month after it was asked, from the sleepy dialogue list. (:

For now, I'll just keep this one on Tumblr since I did manage to keep it pretty short. I kind of cheated and wrote it as a sort of... future-ish part of Dust to Dust because that's the only timeline I've created where I felt the dialogue would be funniest for this prompt. Not to like, semi-spoil my own fic but I've been doing that since 2018 so what else is new.

Title: Say Yes to Cuddling Words: 729 Rating: Teen (for some vague-ish references to the nature of their relationship) Characters/Relationship: Eddie Brock/Flash Thompson/Venom Symbiote Summary: As part of an unorthodox treatment plan aimed at rectifying the damage done to the Venom Symbiote by a prior host, Eddie and Flash find themselves in bed with each other every night. But there are lots of ways to get the neurotransmitters the symbiote needs, and Flash thinks they should try all of them.

“You don’t have to sleep way over there.”

Eddie stiffened. Maybe he could just feign being asleep, and that he hadn’t heard Flash’s quiet words. They hadn’t done anything tonight, just crashed into bed at roughly the same time. Which was fine, their current regimen was working, according to Dr. Steven’s tests. But you could only sleep with someone so many times before they started getting bolder with their commentary.

“Looking at you,” his other helpfully informed him. “Waiting for an answer.”

I’m sleeping.

“Knows you are not.”

With an only slightly-exaggerated sigh, Eddie rolled over to see Flash’s face inches away on the other pillow. “I would be sleeping, if you let me.”

“Uh-huh.” Flash smiled a little in the dark. “Usually you breathe a lot less when you’re actually asleep. Once a minute, at most. And if you really were asleep, symbiote wouldn’t let me wake you up.”

“What do you want.”

He propped his face up a little using his arm. “Look, I’m just trying to be thoughtful here, Eddie. You clutch the bedding subconsciously. You kind of… cradle the pillow. And, you know, the symbiote,” Flash shrugged, a little awkwardly, “obviously.”

“And the point of these observations is…”

“You’re allowed to cuddle me like a teddy bear.”

Eddie frowned at the description.

“If you want. I’m just saying, I’m not going to like, elbow you in the gut if you do.”

He rubbed his face with a hand tiredly. “Go to sleep, Thomps… Flash.” Still had to remind himself occasionally that they had agreed on first names from here on out. At least while in the apartment. At least while this arrangement was in place.

Flash, ever-persistent, reached out and drummed his fingers on Eddie’s shoulder. Cool, a little callused. He couldn’t stop the symbiote from reaching tendrils out to meet its former host’s hand. “I’m a pret-ty good cuddler, just saying.”

“He is.” Fortunately, this time, it didn’t accompany the thought with any foreign memories from its time with him.

Stop.

“Would be nice, Eddie…”

Why are you trying to encourage this? he asked it, though he didn’t need to. The symbiote was quite familiar with all his memories and habits and every relationship he’d ever been in, however few that number was. But that was them, and this was Flash, and those were not the same thing.

“I’m perfectly fine giving you space,” Eddie finally said aloud.

“And I’m pretty sure there are about thirty medical studies out there about the benefits of human contact.”

“We’re not getting enough of that three times a week?”

Flash rolled his eyes. “Listen, try it once. If you like it, if my pal likes it, great. If you hate it, then you can continue sleeping on the edge of the bed and practically fall off of it every night like you normally do.”

“This is ridiculous.”

“Oh, like it’s more ridiculous than our current situation? Come on.”

The only further protest Eddie could manage was a small grunt as Flash turned himself on his side. Flash then scooted himself up against Eddie’s torso, certainly not small by any definition but a kind of strangely comfortable fit. Then Flash reached around, grabbed Eddie’s arm, and draped it over him.

“I get to be the little spoon tonight, since you’re being an asshole.”

“Please don’t ever use that description again.”

“What, a spoo-oo-oo-oon?” he teased, looking over his shoulder to grin broadly at Eddie.

It was annoying, he was annoying, but something about the silly delight on his face had Eddie both looking away and glad it was dark in the bedroom. He focused instead on getting comfortable, if Flash was going to insist on this. He positioned his other arm so it wouldn’t fall asleep under the other man’s weight, and settled in with Flash’s back flush against him. After just a couple minutes, he felt Flash’s breathing slow. Even the symbiote had expelled a kind of pleased warmth all through Eddie’s body. What wasn’t still within him, carefully draped over Flash, too, in strands and various amorphous shapes.

It was… nice.

His other caught the stray thought before he could lock it away. It seemed a little bit smug, in response, but mostly endearing. “Knew you would enjoy it.”

It’s tolerable.

Tolerable, right.

Like some small part of Eddie didn’t think he could get used to this.

#my writing #symbiot3 #flash thompson #eddie brock #venom symbiote #sleeping #venom fic #eddie really is like: i am going to cover up the fact that i have been totally starved for human contact for years by being a complete ass #flash meanwhile: i will chisel away at this man. and then if that fails i'll get a sledgehammer #the symbiote just wants to cuddle 😂#prompt fill

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piosplayhouse · 2 years

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I hear they’re making a sequel to the first spirit hunter game w more of the first protag! I’m pumped. I’m obsessed with ghosts and the best part of any game is reading thru wikis so these visual novel heavy games are like perfectly tailored to me. I hope the middle aged trench coat guy who’s weird to the protag is in it as well.

This is the funniest description of Mashita that I've ever heard LMFAOOO

#HE IS PRETTY WEIRD TO THE PROTAG #to be fair the protag is possibly even weirder ... i think they have gay sex #spirit hunter #death mark

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bloodstainedhair · 2 months

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you ever look at a fictional man and just know that he has crushing debt

This is the funniest fucking description I've heard of such a type of man. I love this I'm stealing this

#asks #anon

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7grandmel · 10 months

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Todays rip: 02/07/2023

Angry Joe's Theme

Season 2 No Album Release (Read more) Angry Joe's Theme - Angry Video Game Nerd Adventures

Ripped by Sonicheroesfan1

youtube

Part of Voiceless Week!

Throughout this week, I've covered voiceless' legacy on the channel across six different rips featuring it in some capacity. That's all well and good - but there's always been another side to the battle that I've ignored until now. Voiceless as a theme underscored a duel wherin Smol Nozomi reigned victorious, yet...is her opponent not equally as important?

That's right - to close off the week, I'm going to be talking about Angry Joe.

To most, he's a YouTuber of the old Nostalgia Critic-era YouTube, a guy who yells and screams about video games. But in his reinterpretation in the SiIvaGunner lore? He's simultaneously one of the funniest and most fascinating characters in the lore, being the channel's first official villain and at some point its main antagonist. During Season 1, in the midst of the channel's normal activity, he was sort of played up as a parasite on the channel, a constant thorn in SiIva's side. For instance, on April 1st the album GiIvaSunner's Highest Quality Video Game Rips Volume 2 was released on April 1st, only it contained no actual rips and was instead exclusively filled with various Angry Joe shitposts (Okay, it contained ONE rip, Grand Dad Metropolis, 244 times over). Then six days later, when the original channel was terminated three months into 2016 (this is when it changed from GiivaSunner to SiivaGunner), the in-universe explanation became that Angry Joe terminated it out of jealousy, perhaps due to the negative reception to Volume 2.

Thing is, the video uploaded to showcase this event supposedly showed Angry Joe dying alongside SiIva. And so he disappeared from the channel, yet...he kept popping up in secret, as bonus images in albums, in an imgur link hidden in a rip's description, during the Reboot ARG, or suddenly on the cover of GilvaSunner's Highest Quality Video Game Rips: Volume FOUR HOURS!. He simply wouldn't go away, yet made his presence relatively unknown to those not digging deep into the lore.

All of this to say, when his duel with Nozomi finally commenced in Episode 8 of the Christmas Comeback Crisis, with over a year's worth of buildup - that shit felt GOOD. His intentions were laid bare in the more dialogue-heavy format of the CCC, and we finally got to see this pest taken care of by our new band of protagonists in the story, underscored with a beautiful theme that I've now spent a week celebrating.

Then, three hours after his defeat, this rip was uploaded. A medley of various themes built on the 8-bit theme Joe himself used as his YouTube intro theme, it really felt to me like a sort of sendoff to the character. The entire song is set into high gear right from the start, by carrying the theme of You Say Run from My Hero Academia throughout it. With the addition of themes such as GO MY WAY, Snow Halation, P-R-O-G-R-A-M, and various Hiroyuki Sawano songs, the song ebbs in and out of a sort of emotional underscore, as if his original theme is being overridden by the musical direction of the CCC - signifying his defeat. Capping the entire song off with ten seconds of Voiceless just seals the deal entirely - this is absolutely worthy of being the theme of Angry Joe's defeat, despite not being heard in the actual episode itself.

Unlike the last time I featured a song without an album release, I decided to give this track its rip name in the title. Because truly - what better description could you get than something so simple: This is Angry Joe's Theme. Stellar work, SHF1. (Now put it in an album!!)

#todays siivagunner #voiceless week #season 2 #siivagunner #siiva #Sonicheroesfan1 #tentative rip name #angry joe #nostalgia critic #christmas comeback crisis #hiroyuki sawano #my hero academia

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punch-love · 6 months

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2, 11, 28, 30, 31, 37, 94, sorry for so many but I really love this qna they have so many good questions

2. Talk about a notable time a narrative or character has looked you dead in the eyes and said “fuck your plan, here’s what we’re actually doing.”

I don't have this happen often in fanfiction, but notably, love-punch is always a few chapters off my original story draft. Peter in particular is pretty evasive of hitting any of the "landmark" moments in favor of following his anger. It's very hard to wrangle him in and make him follow a script because he's a very independent, very selfish character who is not necessarily looking to be part of a love story.

11. what’s something neat you’ve learned while doing research for something you were writing? also, how much do you worry about doing research in general?

I learned a lot about drug trade economics recently for a one-shot I'm working on. It ultimately didn't end up adding that much to the story itself, but I have a pretty good understanding of the farm to table aspect of cocaine now. I also read a book on solitary confinement for Black Ace which didn't really teach me anything "neat" but did make my opinions on prison abolition a lot stronger and backed by prisoner's experiences. I am more of a character writer than a plot writer, so much research I do is usual minor details (I recently researched the largest size of Taco Bell drinks in ozs for instance) but I really enjoy the experience whenever I get to flesh out my writing with information that my brain doesn't have immediate access to. I often save research for the final edit so that I can focus more on writing a good story before I start down a rabbit hole.

28. handwritten notes or typed notes?

handwritten! all of my notes are handwritten so I can throw them away afterwards. I hate clutter and my WIP folders are cluttered enough without a backlog of chapter notes. I use sticky notes mostly.

30. most inspirational quote you’ve ever read or heard that’s still important to you.

I am not an inspirational quote person, sorry.

31. tell us about one of your characters who’s an absolute joy to write

I've said it before, but Wade is the funniest character to write. I love writing characters that are physically immune from the narrative. I like that he doesn't have to censor himself in any way, partially because he doesn't care, and partially because it wouldn't really do him any good even if he wanted to.

37. when creating characters, what comes first: appearance, backstory, motivation, personality, something else?

appearance and/or motivation usually - I'm a very visually stimulated person, so I have to like the "look" of a character, but I also have to be compelled by them and their role of their story to keep them around.

94. do you prefer dialogue or description?

dialogue to the moon and back (though I have improved in the description department from frequent notes from my beta asking where the hell the characters are in the scene)

#mailbox #ask game #no need to apologize for sending me questions where I can talk endlessly about WRITING I love doing that #this ask game really does have great questions thanks for picking some great ones for me to answer

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theoi-crow · 2 years

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Why did you lose Ares, if you wouldn’t mind sharing? I had a similar experience with Artemis where I was very close to her as a child but ended our relationship because I was afraid she would judge me for being lesbian and not asexual. It’s okay if you don’t want to answer this ask, I know it’s a personal question

I'm really sorry that you went through that. If it helps every lesbian I've ever known (and I grew up in what is sometimes known as the LGBT center of the world so that's a LOT of lesbians) who worship Artemis have had a very deep and profound connection with her.

I don't mind answering this question but before I do I need to provide a little bit of context for this, so please get ready for the tea...

I grew up in a cult-like sector of Catholicism and the fear mongering and brainwashing were very extreme.

When I was 12, a friend of mine lent me a Wiccan book (I'm a millennial so this was the early 00s and it was the only witch book I had access to) The book claimed to be an introduction to witchcraft and in my efforts to leave my cult I was looking for spirituality elsewhere. I don't remember what the book was called but it had a really big encyclopedia of the different gods you could work with.

At this point I still thought Ares was an imaginary friend because that's what my mom called him when I first told her back when I was in kindergarten. I even considered myself lucky that my "imaginary friend" was still with me while everyone else's imaginary friends disappeared at earlier ages. Now, before I talk about the moment when found his name in the book I want to stress 2 things that lead to me breaking it off with Ares.

1.) I'm Asexual

When I was 12, I knew I was not romantically interested in anyone but because I was still talking about Ares, my mom and aunts started teasing me about him being my imaginary boyfriend. They made really gross comments which made it hard for me to continue interacting with Ares the way I always have. Their teasing was so bad that to this day I cannot read about people having a godspouse relationship with their gods without feeling triggered. (I understand it's a valid form of worship and I respect how people choose to worship the gods, I just filter the tags for it because I can't read their posts without remembering my mother and aunts asking me how many babies I would like to have with Ares, which also resulted in me never wanting kids.)

2. Ares kept me shield from anything ancient Greek or Roman:

He knew I was too young and brainwashed to think critically and I would take the negative information about him at face value which would make me push him away but I was in a very dangerous area and he was so essential to my survival. (I only knew about the Roman Christians in the Bible but I didn't know the pre-christian Romans had gods because of how the cult I grew up in changed the narrative. When the Bible talked about the Romans worshipping idols, my mom described idols as statues so my mind literally never thought of an idol being a god). Percy Jackson didn't come out until way later and Disney's Hercules severely flopped the first time it was released. Greek mythology was not as popular or as accessible as it is today. So at the time I had never heard of Ares or Mars because of how sheltered and ignorant the cult kept me.

Finally, when I opened the book I saw Jupiter, Venus, and Mercury which I had always assumed were just planets:

I was blown away by planets being referred to as gods so I turned to the page with Mars in it and there he was. The description checked out, he was even wearing the exact same Spartan uniform I had always seen him wear around me. At first I was very excited to realize he was a god but then my heart sank because the book read: "AVOID THIS GOD AT ALL COSTS!" I was 12 and at the time I didn't know a book about gods could be wrong so I, unfortunately, took it all at face value just like he said I would, despite him always being there for me and always taking care of me.

But the funniest part about the whole situation is that now looking back on it Ares never left… I told him I didn't want to see him again and he made it so I couldn't see him anymore.

Every trusted psychic I knew said that there was a really big spirit following me that refused to reveal himself to anyone. After that I became obsessed with a manga called Mars about a troubled teenager falling in love with an artist and I even ripped out the page with the main boy kissing the statue of Mars in it so I could keep it in my pocket and take it everywhere with me for protection.

This was the "Mars" page:

I guess I really missed him too.

#Ares #Greek gods #my childhood #personal #hellenic deities

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