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#tori says things
max--phillips · 2 days
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I get to see a lot of the fresh new names parents are coming up with these days thanks to my job. Some highlights so far: Kinzleigh, Learick, Paizlee, Stryder, Krystalyn, Skyy, Denim, Signe, Jazalynn, Paighton, Kaydense, Brieonna, Zuko, and Lileeauna. These people have to be stopped
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spacegay-official · 6 months
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Pain For Pleasure
(aka "Din Djarin has a piercing kink send tweet")
So, this was initially supposed to be part of a lengthier headcanon post with more characters inspired entirely by the time I got my nips pierced in July, but I got carried away with Din's, then immediately forgot I had it in my google drive and found it a couple days ago, so... here we are.
Also, I know in that poll I posted the majority running as of right this second is green for Din's favorite color, but I went with red for the color of the beads on reader's piercings just because it felt right (and also it was in second place, so)
Pairing: Din Djarin x afab!reader (no pronouns/gendered terms used, but this is a very tit-centric fic)
Warnings: SMUT, this is pure self-indulgent PWP, nipple piercings, blindfolds bc Din, nipple play (sucking, nibbling, that kind of thing), unprotected PiV sex, creampie, talk of other (namely, genital) piercings, also this wasn't well proofread so there might be mistakes.
Words: ~1k
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Din was out on a long hunt. You knew it was going to be a while, and while you usually go with him on these sorts of things, he insisted it was a one man job. So, you stayed with the ship, in the port city you’d landed in. But, sooner than later, you got bored.
So, you put the ship in lockdown and started walking around the city. There were plenty of sights to see, and plenty of things to do, but it was a piercing shop with beautiful jewelry displayed in the window that caught your eye. You went in, initially intending just to buy some jewelry from them, but it turns out they were having a special sale. That was all it took to get you to give into the impulse and just like that, you had your nipples pierced.
As you pondered your jewelry options, a thought crossed your mind--what would Din think? He loved your tits and did not hide that fact. You figured he wouldn’t mind the extra decoration. With him in mind, though, you picked out jewelry with red beads on the end. After the quick (and somewhat less painful than you were anticipating, but it still definitely hurt) procedure, you went back to the ship and admired the new piercings in the mirror for a bit. Yeah, he was definitely going to enjoy this.
Several days later, Din came back from his hunt, successful. He was clearly exhausted, though, taking a deep breath and leaning against the hull in the hold once the quarry was in carbonite and unable to cause any more issues. You smiled and approached him, glad you were currently wearing a thin shirt without a bra underneath.
“How’d it go?” you asked.
He turned his head and looked at you. “I’m glad I’m back,” he answered.
He went to turn his head back, but seemed to double-take. You grinned wider, then started walking backwards towards the bed you shared. You sat down on the edge of it, and pulled the material of your shirt more taught over your chest.
“See something you like?” you asked.
Din walked over to you, and immediately got on his knees between your legs. His hands smoothed up your sides under your shirt, lifting it. You took it off the rest of the way.
“Fuck,” Din breathed.
“I’ll take that as a yes,” you teased.
“When did you get this done?” he asked.
“Couple days after you left. I got bored,” you answered, shrugging a little.
Din’s hands moved to hold your tits, then run his thumb over your nipples and the jewelry. You sighed at the sensation.
“So fucking good to me,” he mumbled, his hands gliding down your body again, this time to the waistband of your pants. He practically tore them off, then began backing you further onto the bed. “Probably hurt, huh? Going through that just to look pretty for me.” 
He reached for something in one of the storage compartments next to the bed, and soon your vision was completely obscured by a blindfold. You heard a quiet hiss, felt the bed shift, then hummed appreciatively as you felt Din’s lips wrap around one of your nipples, sucking, his tongue toying with the piercing. You ran your fingers through his curls, slightly damp from being in his helmet on his hunt. He practically purred as you gently scratched your nails against his scalp.
Din gently nibbled your nipple before releasing it and moving over to the other one. The jewelry added sensitivity you weren’t yet used to, and it went right to your core. You were dripping wet, though you were more than willing to ignore that in favor of letting Din take what he needed. And he kept taking for a while, switching nipples intermittently, occasionally pulling off entirely just to look at them, shiny with spit and a little swollen from his ministrations. At some point during this, you noticed he was grinding against your thigh, hard behind his flight suit.
You gently tugged against his hair, just to grab his attention, not to interrupt him. “You should take your armor off, baby,” you mumbled.
He hummed an agreement, leaning up on his knees to do just that. You heard shuffling and pieces of his armor detaching and being set down next to the bed. It was hurried, not the organized methodical way he typically removes it. After just a few moments, he was back on top of you, kissing your lips fervently as he pinched one of your nipples, making your breath hitch.
“I’m going to take good care of you, mesh’la,” he practically growled. You felt him reach between you and free his cock from his pants, and you grabbed at his shoulders as he pushed into you desperately. You moaned at the stretch.
“You’re perfect. All mine,” Din groaned, once again letting his mouth find one of your nipples.
“Mmm… if I knew this would get you this worked up I would’ve gotten it done months ago,” you said, moaning again as Din rutted into you.
Din made another noise. “Yeah?” he asked. “You’d do anything for me, wouldn’t you?”
You hummed, turning into a cry as Din’s thumb found your clit, your orgasm quickly mounting. “Anything, Din,” you breathed.
Din fucked you with a mix of desperation and purpose, never leaving either of your pierced nipples alone for too long. He knew exactly how to get you to fall apart for him, and he wielded that skill well. With how worked up he’d gotten you just from sucking on your tits, you weren’t going to last long in the first place, but you had a feeling he wasn’t either.
He easily brought you to a climax, and you cried out his name as you came. He followed moments after, spilling into you with a delicious moan before he collapsed on top of you, panting. Your hands cupped his face as Din kissed you gently.
An idea crossed your mind, and you grinned.
“That look usually gets us in trouble,” Din commented, though you could hear the smile in his own voice.
“You know,” you started, “there are other piercings I could get. Like… maybe a VCH piercing?”
“VCH?”
“Vertical clitoral hood piercing,” you answered. “It sits so one of the beads of the piercing is right on the clit, makes things more intense for folks sometimes.”
Din moaned at your words, then kissed you again. You made a noise of slight surprise as you felt his hips grind against yours again.
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catlovertori · 11 months
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All I know is that I’m here. And I’m alive.
- Solitaire, Alice Oseman
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spacegaynsfw · 8 months
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I THINK I JUST SQUIRTED???????????????????????
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max--phillips · 1 month
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My mom just sent me this Instagram reel and it’s hilarious, of course, but the funniest bit was this little tidbit I saw in the corner LMAO
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max--phillips · 1 year
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Imagine having your baptism attacked by Godzilla and then your black sheep uncle & his adopted kid pull up in his vintage hotrod and he kills Godzilla.
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max--phillips · 4 months
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I took this screenshot yesterday but. Girl WHAT??? What the hell are you on about? Do you want babies born or not? Why is the Catholic Church like this
Edit, for anyone that cares: this post was just supposed to be me being baffled that the CC is the way it is. I know why they’re trying to do this, and the “why is the CC like this” was rhetorical. This post was not supposed to gain traction, nor was it supposed to spark discourse. Just like any other transaction for labor in this capitalist hellscape we live in, there are issues with surrogacy, but also like any other feminized labor, it shouldn’t be banned. I will delete any comments containing sexism, racism, homophobia, transphobia, anti-sex work sentiments, or other harmful assumptions. Terfs, gender critical people, zionists, pro-lifers, and bootlickers are not welcome on this post.
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max--phillips · 9 months
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This guy is so funny to me . And he does very good recipes imo
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max--phillips · 4 months
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Episode 1 of the adventure zone vs Dracula did psychic damage to me. Learning that Justin once had a tonsure? The concept of a turbocardinal? The venomous horse? Lady Godwin’s whole deal & the Pierre Reynolds Foundation for Shingles Awareness? Also the fact Griffin started doing the French accent and couldn’t keep it together . God I love this fucking podcast
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max--phillips · 5 months
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SKFKDJCJSNSK
JORTS THE CAT
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max--phillips · 7 months
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I know that we’re all here for the jokes and the hahas and the Laughs, etc, but like. Can we please take a moment to remember that Pedro Pascal is not old. He is. 48. Even Joel Miller isn’t really that old in the grand scheme of things
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max--phillips · 7 months
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Din Djarin and his weird ass child: doing their thing
General Hera Syndulla and Ahsoka Tano: doing their thing
Captain Carson Teva, somehow caught up in all of this:
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max--phillips · 4 months
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For the love of Christ will you people stop smoothing out Pedro’s skin why are you doing that it looks bad and you should feel bad
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max--phillips · 3 months
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Y’know, there are a handful of things that happened in S1 of The Mandalorian that just. We’re never gonna get to experience that again, and that’s heartbreaking tbh. Fuckin
The baby reveal. Obviously.
Watching Din rescue the baby for the first time
That hint at Boba Fett being alive that everyone flipped out about for a year
Moff Gideon’s introduction
Din blasting his way out of the cantina on Nevarro in the hottest most badass fight sequence I think anyone’s ever seen
(And then immediately getting his ass blown up and nearly dying)
The FACE REVEAL
Finding out EXACTLY which of your friends were Star Wars Nerds™️ and which ones just kinda liked Star Wars based on their reaction to Gideon having the Darksaber. It was either “what is that?” or “OOOOH HE SHOULD NOT HAVE THAT” and there was no in-between.
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max--phillips · 5 months
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max--phillips · 1 month
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The File Room
This is the fic I wrote because I started a run of the mill office job a little over a week ago and couldn't help myself. Partly inspired by the fact I did, in fact, spend a good part of my day one day filing contracts away. Enjoy! (oh, also, tagging @miraclesabound as requested!)
Pairing: Max Phillips x afab!reader (otherwise gender neutral, no references to reader's chest)
Warnings: office shenanigans, Max sneaks up on reader and gets punched for it, reader gets eaten out from behind, piv, creampie, a little bit of spit plus something extra (but I'm not gonna ruin the surprise), Max and reader have an ambiguous relationship (ie not explicitly romantic but could be read as such)
Word count: 2k
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You had a stack of reports that needed to be filed away. A big stack. And of course, because nothing can be easy, it’s not like they could be all put in the back of the drawer and be considered in order. No, they all had to be put in order in their respective accounts based on which reports they were and what dates they covered and on and on and on… Normally you wouldn’t mind doing this, because you were pretty good at staying on top of putting them away as you got them, a few at a time at most. But unfortunately, one of your coworkers from the sales department was recently… relieved of his position, and he left the big stack of reports behind. Completely unorganized to boot. You were going to be among the filing cabinets and bankers boxes for quite a while.
Honestly, while you were at it, a few of these accounts could stand to get reorganized… Lord knows some of your coworkers barely even tried to put these reports in the right spot… So off you went to the large room filled with shelves and filing cabinets, earbuds already in and playing your favorite music to work to.
A couple hours into your project, the door to the storage room opened. You didn’t hear it, so you were still entirely focused on your current task. You were putting away a stray report, bent over at the waist to get to the back of a filing cabinet drawer. This gave Max Phillips a spectacular view of your ass. And to make it all that much better, you just so happened to be wearing his favorite bottoms on you. He closed his eyes for a moment and brought his fist up against his mouth in a quiet celebration of this treat.
Max was the sales manager in the office, and despite being in a different department, you somehow managed to spend quite a bit of time together. You’d caught on like a wildfire when he started--after you’d managed to see through his extremely irritating caricature-of-a-business-major facade, that is, and made it clear you weren’t going to put up with his bullshit. That was when he asked you out for drinks after work one Friday, let you in on his little supernatural secret, and very thoroughly disproved your assumption that he was not particularly good, and certainly not very generous, in bed.
Max continued to watch you from the door as you worked for a few more moments, quietly locking the door because of course he was going to get a taste of you in here, how could he not? You dropped a small stack of files you had set aside, and cursed as they fluttered onto the floor. You got on your knees to gather them up again, another sight Max would never tire of, before getting back up and resuming your sorting.
Max finally decided to actually make his presence known. Clearly you were in the zone, your earbuds blocking out the rest of the world. He came up behind you, shamelessly taking your ass in both his hands.
You shrieked as you felt hands on your ass, scaring the hell out of you as you hadn’t heard anyone come into the room. You then whirled around, and, without thinking or registering who actually was doing this… punched the perpetrator directly in the face.
Max recoiled, bringing his hands to his face, as you realized what you’d just done. You gasped and covered your mouth with your hands, afraid for a moment you’d actually done damage or hurt him.
“Oh my god, Max, don’t do that! Are you okay?” you asked, reaching out a bit as you realized you’d definitely hurt yourself. You looked at the knuckles on your hand that had collided with his face, investigating for any visible injury as you clenched and unclenched your fist.
Max started laughing, standing back upright and taking his hands away from his face. “I’m fine, holy shit, if that was anyone else though, they’d have a very broken nose,” he said, taking your now aching hand in his, and looking at you with what someone might call adoration. “Are you okay?”
You sighed in relief, then took out your earbuds so you could actually participate in a conversation with him. “I think so. Don’t fucking scare me like that again, though.” You firmly poked him in the chest, glaring at him.
Max chuckled a little. “Message received, don’t worry,” he said. “Sorry I scared you. I saw how good your ass looked just a second ago and couldn’t help myself.”
You rolled your eyes. “Thanks. Do you need something, or did you just come in here to grope me? I have a lot of reports to put away now that your shitty employee is gone,” you said, gesturing towards the still pretty substantial stack of reports. “And I think I’m going to reorganize some other accounts while I’m back here.”
“Actually…” Max started, taking a few steps forward, making you take a few steps back, towards a table between two sets of shelves that was just below hip height. He let go of your hand and turned you around, moving you to bend over. He once again put his hands on your ass, then dragged them to your hips, then the waistband of your bottoms, which he pulled down and out of the way along with your underwear, letting the fabric pool around your ankles. He got down on his knees, pulling your flesh apart where your ass met your thighs, exposing your cunt to him. “I think I’m gonna do a little more than grope you.”
You muffled a moan as he licked through your folds, then prodded at your hole with his tongue. “Max… I really need to get this done…” you said, but only half-heartedly. You’d definitely much rather be doing this than filing reports all day.
Max hummed, the tone questioning your statement as his tongue moved again, his mouth enveloping your clit and sucking gently. It was a teasing motion, and it made you groan in frustration. “You’ll have plenty of time, sweetheart,” he said, mischief thick in his tone.
He licked against your clit again, then switched to sucking on it, and back and forth for a while, driving you crazy. You were getting close, you just needed…
“Max, fuck, please,” you groaned, reaching behind you and grabbing his hair, pushing him further into you. He firmly sucked your clit into his mouth for a long moment, and groaned into your pussy, which did you in. You moaned as you finally tumbled over the edge, only barely muffling the tail end of the sound. Max worked you through it, lapping up your release feverishly, until you were pulling his hair the opposite direction, starting to edge on overstimulated.
He pulled away, his hands going from the back of your thighs to your hips again as he stood up. “Don’t tell me you’re done,” he said. You looked over your shoulder to see his downright devilish grin. His face was wet with your juices--a sight you were quite a fan of, honestly. “Because I’m not done.”
You smiled as you pushed your hips back, connecting with his. Max grunted as his cock, still confined behind his pants and boxers, made contact with your ass, grinding together briefly before he took half a step back to unbuckle his belt and shove his pants out of the way enough to fuck you. You both moaned as he swiped the tip of his cock through your slit, then began pushing into you at a pace you would describe as teasingly slow given how ready you were for him.
“Are you teasing me to keep me away from my job longer, Phillips?” you taunted, though you were unable to stop the groan leaving your throat as his cock rubbed up against something delicious inside you, just like it always does.
“As if you don’t love this,” he said, snapping his hips forward the rest of the way, ripping another sound from you. You could only imagine the grin on his face at this point, especially knowing there was no arguing with that.
Max began fucking you in earnest, setting a quick pace right away--no matter how much he’d like to, he couldn’t keep you both occupied all day. He grabbed your arm and pulled you back to stand up against him, wrapping his other arm around you to rub your already sensitive clit as he did. You moaned out again, clenching down around his cock as he gave you more stimulation, which made him groan in your ear. He could smell your blood rushing in your vessels just millimeters below the skin of your neck right by his lips, but he would save that for when you were over at his place, not in the file room at work. He compromised by merely nibbling on your skin, then sucking a very visible mark to the same spot.
You moaned at all of the sensations he was bombarding you with, once again getting close to a climax, his expert fingers and cock slamming into that sensitive spot giving you no other choice. You should care about the hickey he just gave you, probably, but in this moment, it just added to the intoxicating cocktail he was serving you.
“I can feel you, baby, c’mon, give it to me,” Max mumbled in your ear. “Cum on my cock, I got you.”
You could never say no to that. You gave in immediately to his encouragement, crying out his name as you went over the edge a second time, your walls rhythmically bearing down on Max’s cock as you did. He moaned your name in your ear, hips stuttering as he closely followed you to his own peak, filling you to the brim. He slowed down as you both came back down to earth, dragging his hand from your clit to your hip, just holding you close to him for a moment.
Just as you thought you were out of the woods, Max bent you forward on the table again. You gasped in surprise--what else could he possibly have in store for you? You both made a noise as he pulled out, and you hummed as you felt his cum start to leak down your thigh. You gasped again as you felt Max’s tongue lick up the same path, gathering his own cum in his mouth.
Every time you think you’ve found everything he does that you find irresistibly hot, Max manages to surprise you.
Max stood again, and turned you around to face him finally. He grabbed your face, making you gasp in surprise again. He dug his index finger and thumb into your jaw at the joint firmly, and grunted, clearly trying to get you to open your mouth.
You obeyed immediately, and whimpered as he spit his own cum into your mouth. You swallowed, and he groaned, finally leaning forward to kiss you. You grinned into it, and let it go on for a while before you gently pulled away to pull your bottoms back up from the floor. Max followed suit, tucking his shirt back in as he quickly fixed his clothes.
“So… wanna come over tonight?” he asked, leaning against one of the shelves as you picked up a new stack of reports to put away.
You hummed exaggeratedly in thought. “Oh, I don’t know, Max, every time I do it’s so disappointing,” you responded sarcastically.
“Well, I bet I can make you ‘disappointed’ twice as many times as I just did if you do,” he snarked back.
You laughed quietly. “Alright, now, don’t make any promises you can’t keep,” you warned.
“Have I ever broken a promise to you?” Max asked, a very confident smirk on his face.
You honestly thought about it for a second. “No, I suppose you haven’t,” you admitted. “But we both need to get back to work. I’ll see you tonight, okay?”
Max grinned, that genuine grin that made you melt a little bit every time you saw it. He kissed you again, a deep, lingering thing that was full of affection. “I’ll see you tonight.”
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