It’s not fun to have a constant urge to scream, punch my head or slam my head into things.
It’s not fun to have to thrash my body around to get an unpleasant sensation from somewhere inside myself to stop.
It’s not fun to feel like electric current is running through my skin when I sit too still.
It’s not fun to have my entire brain overwhelmed by a noise nobody else notices.
It’s not fun to not be able to start “simple” tasks because all the little steps to take in order to start feel like a mountain to climb.
It’s not fun not being able to tell somebody something because I can’t get my brain to lock words and their meanings together to form a coherent sentence in writing or via speech.
It’s not fun having people accuse me of yelling because I talk louder than normal so I’m heard, and then having everybody get annoyed and tell me to repeat myself if I talk quieter.
It’s not fun being unable to understand the person talking to you from a foot away because the room you’re in is full of chattering people.
It’s not fun not being able to manage a simple task like write a phone number down because the room is too hot, too cold, loud, chaotic and bright, and it feels like trying to write while skydiving through an F5 tornado and landing in a tsunami, and everybody is pissed off at me because “writing a phone number is so simple!”
Pedro Pascal as Whiskey | Kingsman: The Golden Circle (2017), dir. Matthew Vaughn
"Hello, gorgeous. I'm Jack. What's your name? How would you like to ride home on a real cowboy? I got a six pack of cold ones on ice and my roomie's out all night. So you can scream my name as loud as you need to, sugar."
Just need to remind some people who shall remain nameless that I don’t glorify autistic!Groot’s autism in my autistic headcanon of him. I show the ugly stuff and it’s part of the picture of his version of normal.
Groot is exactly the kind of autistic person autism moms rant about when they say autism is nothing good and all kinds of ugly.
[Groot says “I am Groot.”]
[Groot says “We are Groot.”]
Groot is nonverbal by alien standards. His speech is five words total and isn’t understandable unless you know him really, really, really well. A trained ear can learn to understand that his speech actually is language and means something. I have him type on an AAC device in my fanfics to help this process.
But Groot makes weird noises. He’ll pace around in circles and groan. He stims. Sometimes he smears poop if he gets his hands on some. If he wore clothes, he would need to be dressed and undressed by somebody else because there’s a high chance he’ll walk out with everything on backwards or inside out.
He can’t follow instructions well if they’re thrown rapid fire at him, but he’ll do better if somebody takes an extra second to make sure he’s paying attention and tells him exactly what they need him to do. He understands words, but he pays more attention to voice tones and actions than he does the words being said. He gets lost doing “simple” tasks sometimes.
He’s aware that there are social rules, but can’t really follow them even when he tries. The best he can do is it still like a statue and not move or make a sound and hope he blends into his surroundings. If a sensory need comes up, such as hunger or thirst, he’ll usually attend to it regardless of what’s going on around him.
[Groot eats a leaf off his shoulder.]
[Groot drinks water out of a public fountain.]
He loses all control of his body when he has meltdowns. He’s the person who will chew his wrists all the way through (they heal fast), beat himself until he ruptures his eyeballs (they grow back :P), bangs his head until he either cracks it open (heals fast) or gives himself a concussion (takes time to recover from), and that’s not mentioning the screaming and flailing he does in between.
His meltdowns are brutal if he’s sick, triggered, in pain or overstimulated. Overstimulated meltdowns burn off in a few minutes. The other kinds can last until the problem is solved. His ability to communicate understandably goes away when he’s in distress, so his friends have to take note of his behavior to find out what’s wrong. Sometimes he gets violent when he has meltdowns...
[Groot thrashes a bunch of bad guys around a hallway.]
[Groot lets out a roar!]
His senses are in chaos a lot of the time. It’s hard work for him to make sense of the world around him, but he knows how his own brain works and he works with it instead of fighting against it.
Groot’s every waking moment is not meltdowns and misery because his friends know how to take care of him and support him. He’s treated like a person and not a problem to shuffle around or solve.
When he flips his shit, his friends immediately go into “what happened to you?” mode rather than “make him stop that!”
Yes, an element of their action is to help Groot control his body and soothe him so he doesn’t seriously injure himself, but afterward they immediately go into “find out what’s wrong” mode because calming him down when something is wrong is only a temporary fix. They solve the problem behind the behavior instead of stopping the behavior and leaving it to repeat and repeat and repeat and...yeah.
Does my description above make you see Groot as anything other than a disaster?
Try this: Groot is a competent, sweet, selfless, giving person who aims to please and tries to love everybody unless they give him a reason not to. He is intelligent, but can’t show it very well because it’s not intelligence as most people think of it.
He doesn’t think in words at all unless it’s remembering something said to him or remembering text; everything else is sensory, images and concepts. It’s a lot of work to turn all that into mere words. People talk about making things cognitively accessible-- Groot typing is him making his thoughts cognitively accessible to neurotypicals. Imagine taking all the information from every book ever written and having to summarize all of that in a single color or sound, and you’ll have an idea of what Groot has to do mentally with every word he types.
His ‘native’ language is emotions. People smiling at him and him smiling back is a conversation in his mind because feelings were exchanged. He learns peoples’ behavior patterns and maps out what their actions mean in the context of the situation. People whose actions and body language don’t match their words frustrate him because it feels like they’re lying to him. He gets an urge to shake somebody and ask them what they actually feel when what they say and what they do aren’t lining up.
Groot is the most at home in nature. I mean, he is a walking plant, so it makes sense that he’s wise in the ways of nature. This is where his intelligence shows up, but he rarely gets to display it when he’s out in space.
He can figure out what season it is on a planet by observing the temperature, general weather and where shadows fall. He memorizes the wind patterns of planets he visits and notices how they change throughout the days and seasons. In a building, he memorizes all the airflow patterns and notices when it changes. Yes, that means he’ll feel you breathing in a room that’s normally very still. His “airflow maps” can be great in a spaceship if there’s an air leak, because he’ll notice the change in how air flows and look for why.
He can use his taproots to taste plants and see if they’re poisonous to somebody else or not. He can do a ten finger countdown when rain is about to arrive and it’ll come down when he hits zero. He’ll map out where and when the sun(s) / moon(s) will rise and set. He’s pretty good at guessing if it will be hot or cold out that day. He can hear the rumble of hail and warn people before it arrives. (Or he’ll try.) And if he tells you there is going to be a tornado in two minutes, GTFO because there is going to be a tornado in two minutes, and he will stand within ten feet of where it will touch down.
Groot loves finding fractals in nature. The spirals of ferns, the repeating patterns of leaves and the centers of flowers bring him total delight. He loves watching sunsets change colors and feeling rain bead on his bark. Seeing the world reflected in miniature in a dewdrop can hold his attention for ages. He likes dancing to the wind as much as he likes dancing to music. The sun is his friend and the stars are distant companions.
He thinks neurotypicals hurry against the flow too much. He would describe them as people wondering why they got hurt while trying to make a tornado stop spinning when they could’ve saved themselves the trouble by taking shelter and waiting for the tornado to pass.
[Groot holds out a flower to someone out of frame.]
There, I just gave two detailed images of the same person.
Now please consider how you talk about the autistic person in your life and realize you might be painting a totally hideous image of them that doesn’t represent who they are at all.
Autistic people are more than behaviors and struggle.
sooo what are your thoughts on c!quackity and the path he's taken? what do you think of his actions? i really wanna hear your thoughts on everything. he's obviously not a hero, not a guy guy either but he isn't one of the bad guys, not really. at least not yet. personally i'm just really enjoying cc!quackity's work. i absolutely love his character, how he portrays him, all the little details and plot seeds he's planted. you can see how much love he puts into everything. all of it, *chef's kiss*
(warning, this is gonna be character critical because i don't agree w c!quackity's morals anymore)
i'll be honest: i don't agree with it. like, any of it. originally i could see like, threatening/mildly harming dream for the book info. fine. but after that, still torturing him? for months? nope
and i hated everything he's done this stream too
he's clearly a sympathetic character, and i sort of see where he's coming from (sort of), but i don't agree with or support any of it.
if i'm being completely honest-- this will be a controversial one but-- he's practically as bad as c!dream at this point.
c!dream is considered as bad as is he is because he tortured people and manipulated everyone around him. is c!quackity even that different at this point?
(from a meta/audience perspective though: i fucking love this, it's awesome and i cannot wait to see what happens next)
tornado warning testing going on and my friend said “wouldn’t it be ironic if there was an actual tornado on tuesday at 10 am when they’re testing the warning because everyone would just be chillin”
and i was like “haha yeah, but only if the tornado wasn’t harmful because you know i don’t wanna go to some mystery realm thing and get kicked out by midgets and attacked by a witch on my own only to meet a talking sac of hay, a guy made of metal, and a coward in a fursuit who all go with me to go to some dude who can get me back home with a concussion and a funky dream.”
to which my friend replied “and traumatize the hell out of your dog”
also!! taylor has donated to disaster relief in nashville so many times!! so don’t claim that all she’s doing is posting a generic instagram story!! we don’t know what she’s doing and knowing her heart that’s not all she’s doing!!
Ummm...the town my college is located in got hit...by a tornado...it tore a couple roads in half and barely passed by my college. (I freaking saw the thing!) So! I survived a tornado attack...but a couple students at my college didn’t from what I’ve heard which is very sad. It’s just an odd thing in my opinion. I’ve never been in close proximity with a tornado before. (No I don’t count dust devils as tornados. Those adorable little sandy whirlpools are so cute.) The school doesn’t know what to do...everyone’s kind of freaking out.
what do you do whenever you’re freaking out about something? i’m really scared right now because it turned into a tornado warning and i’m gonna cry
keep calm, breathe. get to a safe place, preferably a basement or cellar and away from windows. if you can/want to, check in with friends and family members. stay alert, but remember to breathe. if you feel yourself panicking, breathe and focus on that. you will be okay.
hey, i hope everyone last night that was in the area of the tornado is okay! it went through my town, but thankfully my house wasn’t damaged and all my friends seem to be okay. message me if you need to talk or if you need anything!!! i love yall <3
mother nature is no joke, guys. there was a tornado that ripped through my area last night and it did more damage than a lot of folks realized (luckily it looks like no fatalities ) it was also the reason i got point zero hours of sleep, so i shall lurk for now.
I guess it was just a traumatic year that it all happened. It actually started in July. It was 2000. My grandpa who I was very close to sent me home to my parents and later that day had a heart attack and passed away. That's the first death that I can actually remember in my life. I'd had more before that, but that's the one that stuck. Then in September, a big tornado came through my town. It destroyed a lot of my town, went down my street. It gave me ptsd of storms. I still struggle through storms. After the tornado, we moved into my grandpa's old house.
Now for the biggest event that made it hardest.
My mom had my baby brother on November 13 that year. He came home on the 15th. On the 16th, right after sending me to school, my mom had my brother in his bassinet, which was raised. One of my dogs was outside in her run, one was in her kennel asleep still. The third was roaming the house. My mom went into the next room, a connected kitchen, with a wide doorway that you could see through easily, and grabbed her tea. In that time, the dog roaming the house had managed to bite my baby brother. His stomach and back was pierced as well as a laceration by his ear. It wasn't done in aggression though. He was crying. The dog was very much a nanny dog to all of us growing up. She was trying to calm him down and slipped.
After a fight with my mother about taking him in careflight and whether she could go, or even if she could go in the ambulance(just take the baby to the hospital and let her go, why are you wasting time this is ridiculous), they finally flew him to the hospital. When my brother got to the hospital, they performed a surgery, but the tubes they were inserting, they inserted backwards. The time it took trying to repair the mistake is what led to his death.
I remember being picked up from school and my siblings looking so somber. But I had no clue what was going on. Until I got to the hospital and my mom was holding my deceased brother sobbing. I was so proud to finally be a big sister. And in 3 days, the morning after he came home, I lost my brother. And that event haunts me every year. What if I had stayed home like I begged. Would I have been able to help by being in the room with him? Could I have made a difference? Is life really that fickle that someone can slip away from you so quickly?
These were my thoughts as a six year old little girl. And they just advance year after year. And I always dealt with them by myself. And I still try. And that's why I disocciate so bad. I just get stuck in my head when I am trying to sort through my feelings and thoughts.
everyone freaking out that taylor didn’t endorse someone for super tuesday but her parents could’ve been affected by a freakin tornado?? i think that’s more urgent for her rn and i have confidence she’ll speak up later when the candidate is announced and she can give it her all instead of being like “i support [candidate]!” then having to back a different candidate later