#what if southern toad

[arc-angel-o]

Would Toad utilize the contraction y'all

#what if southern toad #but is that canonverse toad? #rabbit web series #rabbit kyle prue #toad rabbit

[teethrotter]

kansans are bred different

#aka today my boyfriend made me realize that it is not normal to constantly find turtles + frogs + toads + snakes + etc. in your yard #much less to just pick them up and tout them around / feed + water them #have been doing an intensive gardening job at my old house for several days and today found a snapping turtle #picked him up without a single thought #it is actually shocking that i have not been bitten / stung by a wild animal #considering that i have been handling anything that happens to wander into my yard for like 20 years #also found out that the southern accent i had as a child ( which was bred out of me for the most part ) comes back the more tired i get #i always pick up the shit that i find in the yard ( excluding bugs fuck bugs absolutely not ) #even snakes as long as they are not venomous ( you can tell by the head shape ) #anyway i don't know what to tell y'all. kansas is ass but we are simply built different. farm

[morallyinept]

Further to my Pedro Boys Cocktails, and my Javier Peña Special Cocktails, now it's time for some SNL Character Themed Cocktails! 🍹

Again, no measurements are included so you can make them as strong or as weak as you like. Pictures of the cocktails used are for reference, based on what I think they would look like with the ingredients used, but are not verbatim. Go crazy.

Drink responsibly, folks. 🥴

If you make any, please tag me so I can see your tasty creations!🍹

NSFW smack talk below.

Enjoy! 🖤

Check out my Pedro Boys Rambles here.

The 'Mommy Dearest'

Hendriks Gin, grapefruit juice, elderflower liqueur, rosemary sprigs, salty rim & fresh grapefruit slice to garnish. Serve over ice. Not too much salt; you don't want that salty 'tude from Mama Flores to sting... Take your vegan sliders with on your way out.

The 'LA Mush Mouth'

Vodka, peach schnapps, blue curaçao, lemon juice, Sprite/lemonade. Serve over crushed ice. Or in a drip bag hooked to your veins. Wake up from a coma looking incredibly well put together and handsome for someone who was hit by a Party City truck, covered in paaaapah, and proceed with speaking Spaaaanish.

The 'Fancam Fapper'

White Rum, grenadine, strawberry liqueur, lime juice, soda to top. Fresh strawberries and mint leaves to garnish. Stop being a bias and munching on it, and get yourself down to detention where Mr Ben is expecting you to complete your, ahem, extra credit...

The 'Southern Fried Fuck'

Tequila, grenadine, Maraschino liqueur, orange juice, splash of cranberry juice. Orange slices and cherries to garnish. Order fried chicken wings in abundance and dive into a kiddie pool of ranch dip on game day. Just don't expect to get laid after. Games on, innit.

The 'Italian Stallion'

Vodka, Cabernet Sauvignon wine, cranberry juice, simple syrup, lemon juice, frozen blackberries or blueberries to garnish. Ensure you leave a big, generous tip for the waiter whose breath you take away constantly, bella. Hold up, he's on the floor... shit, anyone know CPR?

The 'Shroom Shooter'

Roku Gin, Yuzu juice, Rioja red wine, demerara syrup, lemon juice, 1 egg white to top, frothed. Fresh thyme and cloves/bay leaf. There is a good chance this cocktail might taste like its literally sprouted out of the ground, and won't go down as smoothly as bisexual Toad on Rainbow Road. Might need a power up.

The 'Ginny & Juice'

Tanqueray Gin, Tonic water, orange juice, orange bitters, splash of pink grapefruit juice. Orange slice to garnish and serve over ice. Stare blankly at the quiz master when you don't know the answer. Sink a few of these instead and slump over your buzzer. Game over.

The 'Antonio & Cujo'

Clear Gin, lime juice, Maraschino liqueur, orange bitters, lime slice. Serve over ice. Serve with a slab of well, well, well done steak with ketchup on your date with Antonio Banderas, who's constantly in want of your fine ass. I mean, the man is just kidding himself otherwise... woof.

The 'Cookie Crusher'

Irish Cream liqueur, Goldschlager cinnamon schnapps, butterscotch schnapps, dash of pouring cream. Crushed oatmeal cookies for the rim and to dust on top. Serve over ice. Make sure you the bake the cookies yourself, otherwise Mama Flores won't be happy with you... but her sewing circle will be.

'The Tittywank'

Mezcal, Galliano liqueur, vodka, splash of lemon juice, spiced honey syrup, drizzle of golden honey. Lemon twist to garnish. Drink really quickly without staring like a drooling chimp at that waxed décolletage, and then order a Slippery Nipple. Hand it to Pedro with a straight face and absolutely no innuendo at all. Yo, his eyes are up here, bub.

'Pedro's Purple Rain'

Vodka, blue curaçao, splash of cherry sours, grenadine, cranberry juice, pineapple juice, splash of Sprite/lemonade. Serve over ice. Lemon slice to garnish. Break out some Prince and croon at the top of your voice for Pedro to dance in the Purple Rain with you. Crying optional, but almost guaranteed.

'Made In Chile'

Bergamot Castro liqueur, tequila, chilli syrup, blood orange juice, watermelon juice, splash of lime juice, castor sugar. Fresh or grilled chilli to garnish, serve over crushed ice. A hot spicy drink, for a hot spicy tamale! Raise a toast to Pedro and his fantastic SNL hosting skills this year. Here's to the giggles. And the mouthwash needed after you drink this shit. Salud!

🖤

#pedro pascal #pedro pascal snl #pedro pascal cocktails #jett's pedro boys #pedro pascal characters #miss flores #mr ben snl #wing pit snl #charlie snl #pedro boy cocktails #cocktails #mixology #jett's cocktails

[riddle-me-ri]

a/n: so umm…is it weird that I’ve given myself my own like brain rot for my general-partially biased take on a character? I just couldn’t get a Southern Jonathan out of my mind lmao. Plus as much as I’m absolutely suffering in this Texas heat…I do recall a time when summer was decent, especially at night out at my papa’s house…so it’s also a wee little love letter to those days…cause I do miss them. 

Trigger Warning: alludes to sexual activity but nothing explicit, some angst if you squint, heavy touching, and kissing. Also perhaps some wee OOC-ness maybe? This is a bit before he dives deep into his Scarecrow alias and my Jonny is a bit more confident when he’s with someone he cares for…and is in his neck of the woods so to speak.

Word Count: 1.2 k

General Scarecrow/Jonathan Crane x Reader - Summer Nights

Tiny blades of fresh grass bit slightly at your bare feet as you ran through the open field. Your smile was wide to the point it almost hurt your cheeks. 

Your long-time boyfriend, Jonathan Crane held your hand tightly as he lead you across the field to a little “watering hole” he called it. 

Your legs are just about to go numb from the long exertion of running to match up with Jonny’s pace, but you finally made it to a tiny lake that laid out just before some dense woods. 

The water glittered as it reflected the bright twinkling stars on a cloudless summer night. The moment is calm, just a few chirps of crickers or the grunts of toads filled the silence. 

Then you realize that Jonathan isn’t beside you anymore. 

“Jon?” You asked out loud, softly at first. “Ugh, Jonny! Where are you?” 

“Right here, darlin’.” He was behind a tall and wide tree. 

You walked over to the tree. “What’re you doing?” 

“Well, wouldn’t want to get my workin’ clothes wet, now would I?” He stepped out from behind the tree and he wore nothing but his boxer shorts. 

“Jonathan!” You squealed as you instinctively covered your eyes and turned away. 

“What? It’s not like you ain’t seen me in my skivvies before-”

“Not out here…i-in the open!” You hissed, you quickly glance around, hoping no one would show up to prove your point. 

“Honey, I can assure you we’re the only ones out here. You ain’t got nothin’ to be afraid of.” 

You scoffed, crossing your arms. “That’s rich coming from you.” 

Jonathan chuckled deviously. “Point taken. But I promise nothin’ will getcha…especially with me around.” 

He walked up towards you and wrapped his arms around your waist. You placed your hands on his chest. You could feel the pounding rhythmic beating of his heart past his pale skin. 

“Well…”

“Well what?” 

Jonathan grinned. “Aren’tcha gonna join me?” 

“Wha–?” Before you could finish asking, Jonathan broke from the embrace and dashed toward the short wooden pier. 

“Jonny!” You shouted, astonished. 

The only response was the sound of splashing water. 

You rushed out to the edge of the pier and watched your lanky boyfriend breakthrough the water. 

“What’re you waiting for? It’s awfully lonely out here!” He chuckled, swimming closer to you just below the edge of the pier. 

You were silent for a beat as your eyes shifted left to right. 

“Is the water cold?”

“Nope.” 

“Do I need to take off my clothes?” 

“Unless you wanna be cold when you get out, darlin’.”

Another beat. You sighed before slowly deciding to take off your clothes. You were still hesitant to get in until you were down to your underwear and heard Jon let out a wolf whistle. Pulled by the urge to smack him, you dove in after him. 

Jonathan’s laugh echoed as he tried to fend off your hands, restraining them in his hands by your wrists. 

“Was that so hard?” He teased. 

“No…but you lied. The water is a little cold.” You huffed.

Jonathan chuckled warmly, he placed your wrists around his neck and his hands went under water to wrap around your waist. 

“Don’t worry, I’ll help warm ya up.” 

“Ha. Ha. Ha.” You deadpanned before he leaned in to kiss you. 

His lips were wet from the water, making it all the more easier to get your tongue to slide past his lips and into his mouth. Your skin began sticking to his and his grip around your waist got stronger and tighter as if he was trying to keep you afloat for as long as he can. 

You slowly, although reluctantly pulled back. You rested the tip of your nose against the tip of his crooked one. You remember how it got so crooked in the first place. It was already adorably long…but it wasn’t always crooked. 

A couple of classmates from your college have always harassed you and one day Jonny saw it, needless to say he wasn’t going to let them pick on you, like they did him, without a fight. The fight eventually got broken up by the dean and Jonathan and the other party was suspended for a time. 

When you went to check on him the following day, his nose was inflamed and constantly bleeding. You remember kissing it that day…and the next day the bleeding stopped and the swelling went down. 

Back in the present, Jonathan began kissing and lightly suckling on the water droplets that fell down your neck. 

“J-Jonny…” You mumbled out, breathlessly. “I gotta ask you something.” 

Jonathan didn’t hesitate to raise his head up to look at you. “What is it, darlin’?” 

“I just…I’m worried about this whole…fear tactic thing…I don’t want you to get in trouble or get hurt! Billy isn’t worth the risk…just to get back at him?” 

Jonathan sighed. “Honey, we’ve been over this…men…or, better yet, boys like him need a taste of their own medicine. They need to know what it’s like to be afraid…submissive…powerless…if they don’t they’re just gonna keep picking on those weakest.” 

“But does it have to be you? Why do you got to do it?” 

Jonathan perked up an eyebrow, his eyes wandered off into the water as he thought about why. “Because I know…I know fear better than most anyone. Who better to rear it’s ugly head?” 

Your shoulders sloched as you sighed in defeat. You suppose there truly was no getting to him. To back out of this plan of his. 

You brought your hands up from around his neck to frame his jaw on both sides. Your thumb caressing just below his cheeks. 

“Just…please be careful, sweetheart.” You pleaded.

Jonathan leaned his face into your touch before softly kissing along the inside of your palm. “I will, honey. I always am.” 

“I’m looking at a crooked nose that says otherwise.” You giggled. 

Jonathan chuckled. “It didn’t get crooked under the best of circumstances, but I know you love it.” He brought his face down towards yours and rubbed his nose side to side against yours. 

Your smile grew as you pulled him in closer so his lips can meet yours again. 

After sucking on each other’s lips for awhile, Jonathan resumed his task from before with suckling along your skin. Finishing where he left off on one side of your neck and then going to the other side. Your fingers were dug deep in his wet mop of sandy brown hair, doing all that you can to keep his attention there. 

Jonathan pulled you closer to him once more, as the water tries to pull you apart. When your body was up against his, you felt a certain bulge below the surface. Your audible gasp, clued Jonathan to know you knew. 

“I think it’s time for us to take this back to dry land, whataya say, darlin’?” Jonathan whispered in your ear. 

You gulped, nodding your head against his. “Please.” 

Jonathan chuckled deviously. “You better shake a leg, or I’ma just have to drag you to the bottom with me.” 

You dramatically shrieked at the threat as you began swimming back to shore, with Jonathan quickly following you in your wake.

#ri writes #the scarecrow x reader #jonathan crane x reader

[cosmic-spider]

Rottmnt four kings au x fem reader

A new world?

(So I’m going to make it seem that the reader is more of a southern and country style thigh there home in a more forest area. So sorry if some of you don’t like it like that.)

━━━━━━━⊱✿⊰━━━━━━━

It was another day as you were taking care of your dogs and chickens out side of your house.You had to take care of your self since you’re mom had to go of the to another city for work for a month since she was a nurse.

Plus you had a job as animator and voice actor at home. Even if you were barely in your second year of high school that you took online at home.

Even if you we’re stuck home doing all the chores in the house at the time. You just playing video games and watching childhood movies in my spare time.

After a bit you went outside to go fill up the chickens water tanks and give them there food. As you finished giving the chickens there food you got reader to go inside. Until you see one of the chickens run off into the woods.

You ran after the chicken which only scared it more as it then ran to the area of a small river that led up to a grain pipe that was sticking out of the ground that had a lot of plants all over it.

You then caught up to it from a distance and not scare it away again. The chicken that jumped on top of the side of the tube then you slowly got closer to the chicken.The chicken then jumper over the old pipe as it saw you approaching. You then tried to get the chicken the second it was still on the pipe.

But the chicken got away last second and you ended up on top of the pipe spreed out on top of it as you grunted in pain from hitting the pipe in the process. A second later the tube slowly started to glow a light blue from under you.

Before you could question what was happening the tube then sucked you in as you were then transported into a type of tube systems that were in “the sky”!?

The next thing you know you were now shot out of another pipe from a wall this time. As you were shot out you hit a bunch of giant mushroom the size of a two story house.

That sent you in so many diferente detections in a short and fast amount of time then landed on another that broke your fall. As you rolled of it and landed on the ground on your back.

You got off the ground and rubbed your head from the fall. Then looked around as you saw that you were now In a area made of only mushrooms of different sizes and colors. From regular little small ones to ones as big as houses.

What….the? What is this place?

You then looked all around the area until her eyes landed on a blue mushroom that was at the hight of her knees. She then goes over to the mushroom holding her right arm out to touch it.

But before she got the chance to a creature that looked to have a mushroom for a head or hat jumped out from behind the blue mushroom.

Do not touch that mushroom you will die!

The creature yelled out as it waved its hands as a warning to you. You stumble back in fear at the sudden creatures appearance as you fall on the ground.

Oh sorry. This one is perfectly safe.

The creature told you at hugged the mushroom then got on the ground and helped up.

Wow your a human and is new to here are you?

Umm yeah I’m human….and who or we’ll what are you?

You said as you brushed you’re self of from the fall. Then slowly tack a few steps back a bit scared.

Oh I’m a toad and my name is toad. Ironic isn’t it? Sorry about the scare from earlier.

Oh it’s ok I’m just a bit shaken up from being launched out from the pipe.

You said as you take a few deep breaths to calm your self a bit.

Well is there anyway to get me how since the last I saw the pipe I got out of it kinda got destroyed from how old it was.

Well I’m not the best at the pipes out here. But I’m always up fro helping someone. So if you want I can take you to someone that can help you. If you want?

The creature now named toad told you starting off a bit sad not being able to help you right away. But then looked at you with a smile giving you a answer on how he would help.

Yes please I would appreciate it if you could take me to someone to help me!

You said happy knowing that there could be someone to help you.

Ok then in that case I’ll take you to my home the mushroom kingdom!

the toad told you then started to run away and jump on top of a few big mushrooms. Oh Wait for me!

you yelled out as you ran after the small mushroom guy. Climbing, running, and jumping over big mushrooms of many different sizes heights and colors. Until after a good fifteen minutes that felt like a hour of fallowing the toad. You both stop on one mushroom as you start to catch you breath then you looked up and saw a bunch of rounded hills and the biggest one on top of them all having a White castle with a red roof.

wow!

I know it looks grate right? But let’s get going it going to get dark in a few hours. So we need to get you to the prince before dark.

the toad said as he slid down a stem of a mushroom then got on the ground and ran of to the defection of the kingdom.

so the start of this love battle how will the prince react to a human in his kingdom.

@gal-with-pastels

@lexiechr

@sweaterrat

@f1oricide

#four kings au #king raph #king don #king mikey #prince leo #king bom omb! mikey #king bowser raph #x reader #4 kings au

[keepingeahalive]

Hopper Croakington II Headcanons:

His full name is Prince Hopper Thaddeus Croakington II.

He grew up in a southern US lifestyle. His mother especially embodied Southern hospitality and encouraged him to do the same. His father was more of a northern type but still very welcoming and amicable.

His family was on a reality show called “Keeping Up with the Croakingtons.” It’s the main reason why he’s socially awkward and anxious, due to cameras watching and following him. His “Frog-Poofing” was popular among fans, making him more and more anxious. The show finally ended after he started school, much to his and his mother’s relief.

He had a more pronounced stutter when he was little. He recited the Crooked Man poem to help him overcome it, but it still comes out sometimes.

The reason the kissing cure is not permanent (at least, for recent generations) is because the true antidote to the curse would be for the princess to kill Hopper. In the original story, the Frog Prince was thrown against a wall and killed, only to be resurrected as a human. Hopper is so scared of this happening that he’s convinced himself that he’ll break the curse when he finds the right princess.

He had a habit of eating bugs in human form when he was little. 

He is a complete momma’s boy. His father was there, caring, and present in Hopper’s life, but he was always closer to his mother. 

Hopper suffers from seasonal depression. Winter months make him feel sluggish, and he copes by eating. He undergoes light therapy to help with this. 

He’s a fairly decent cook. He’s no Jack Horner, but he makes a mean pecan pie. 

He had a bodyguard named Iron Henry. He was somewhat of a second father to Hopper growing up. 

Hopper’s relative, the Toad King, is responsible for the genetic frog curse in Hopper’s family line. For whatever reason, he passed the legacy down to his niece/nephew instead of any direct heirs. He then placed the frog curse on the family himself, modifying it so that a princess’s kiss will only cause a temporary remedy. No one remembers why he did this, but Hopper has a deep resentment for toads because of it.

He is slightly farsighted. 

He’s very athletic. He loves bookball especially. It’s something he and his dad bond over.

He has enormous feet. 

He loves watching sitcoms from the 90s. His favorites are the Fresh Prince of Spel-Air, Prince Meets Kingdom, and Saved by the Wishing Well. 

The frog curse in Hopper’s family is triggered by something the person must overcome. For Hopper, it’s his awkwardness. 

He prefers writing over speaking. It helps him truly convey what he’s feeling without stumbling. 

He is a very good poet, even in his human form.

While he’s afraid of many things, he has a particular fear of herons. 

Hopper is gay, but he’s been told all his life that kissing the princess of his destiny will break his curse. He wants that to happen more than anything (and he doesn’t want to think about the other option) so he’s had to convince himself that he has to like girls. He latched onto Briar because he admires her confidence and ability to make friends with anyone. 

Hopper’s dad never broke his frog curse, even though he found his princess and still loves her. The family pretends that this isn’t the case to keep up appearances, but Hopper does worry that he may never overcome his curse.

#eah #ever after high #ever after high headcanons #Hopper Croakington II #eah hopper #frog prince

[outofangband]

Have you ever considered an environmental (or societal!) worldbuilding post for Taur-im-Duinath? There's so little in canon, I'd be fascinated to know your headcanons.

(This is a somewhat selfish ask as I am writing a fic that will have a significant portion set there, but genuinely love reading your posts -- no rush or pressure on this!)

Environmental World Building Masterlist

Taur Im Duinath is a large forest located in southeast Beleriand. Its name translates to Forest between rivers as it is located between the river Sirion (on the west) and the river Gelion on the east. In its southern reaches on the western border it extends to the lands around the Bay of Balar. The Andram, the wall of rocky hills ending with Amon Ereb in the east, lies directly to the north of Taur Im Duinath

As you said, it is mentioned very little in The Silmarillion, only twice actually. This corner of Beleriand is described as dark, tangled and wild with no elven or human inhabitants save some Avari

It can be difficult to judge exact sizes on Tolkien’s maps but Taur Im Duinath appears to be one of the largest forests in Beleriand

My thoughts

These are more general thoughts and for flora and fauna I gave examples of genuses or families rather than species but if you give me specific categories I can make more detailed posts!

-The climate is not as mild as Ossiriand but is far more mild than northeast Beleriand. The winters do not generally drop below negative one degree Celsius or thirty degrees Fahrenheit. Snow falls lightly in mid winter with sleet often occurring before and after.

-Humidity is higher than the rest of eastern Beleriand excepting parts of central Ossiriand with high rainfall especially in late winter and spring.

-The forest is dense. It is deciduous and coniferous mixed forests with scattered swampier areas which tend to be slightly more open. Most plants must be shade tolerant.

-There is an undergrowth of a variety of species of mosses and ferns as well as fungi. Some species of extremely shade tolerant herbaceous plants grow as well as a wider variety in the wetlands, scattered clearings, and forest edges

-The conifers are primarily spruce, Asian pine, with some fir and even cypress closer to the bay. Tsuga dumosa, a species of hemlock, grows closer to Ossiriand

-The deciduous trees are primarily birch and several species of oak. Ash and tilia species also grow

-Willow and aspen grow in the wetlands and closer to the river with some alders and a few wych elm.

-Animal biodiversity likewise varies throughout the large region. High diversity of small birds, mostly passerine but also nightjars, owls, a few species of ground birds, etc.

-The undergrowth provides habitat for the highest diversity of animals. Lots of Orthoptera (crickets, grasshoppers etc) so the forest is rarely quiet though the dense canopy muffles the sounds. Also high diversity of beetles, worms, rolly pollys, snails and slugs, and then toads, salamanders and newts, certain species of wood frogs, and small mammals like shrews especially by the water

I hope this is ok, @polutrope! I wasn’t sure what areas to focus on so please feel free to ask for more specific areas!

#the silmarillion #beleriand #musing and meta #taur im duinath

[banyanas]

Okay there is no Way this is gonna fit in the fic wordcount limit (and a lot of it is background understanding to all my other fics too lmao) so who wants to talk about fiddly somewhat mundane toad-centric worldbuilding in regards to Imperial Amphibia -> Caste System Implementation time period??? And even if you don't want to I'm showing it to you anyway.

The 4 tower lords (Cardinal Lords used as an older title when I write) as participants and vassals to the Newtopian military is... pretty new. Especially because toad clans didn't really have a formal military in the first place (and still don't- toad army we see is an arm/branch of the overall Newtopian/specifically Leviathan-ruled Amphibian military). Previously, of course everyone paid fealty (and taxes but we will get to those) to the crown, expected to follow the laws of the united empire under the Leviathan dynasty, but toad clanheads and lords acting in a formal military position in direct vassalage to another army is... definitely new. As far as 'new' goes for a place with an implied-lengthy history as Amphibia does.

Nowadays becoming a Cardinal Lord means becoming an officer- if said lord wasn't already one in the first place. It's a more concrete requirement in the modern era, but before that, hey, remember what I said about taxes? It's relevant just stick with me a bit pls.

So, with the Me-Brand toadbuilding, toads were traditionally nomadic, and likely a more pastoralist society (tarantula cheese...). This did include very few permanent communities toad caravans cycled through, usually as a place of trade/commerce and cultural significance (specifically cairns and mass gravesites) for individual and allied clans. And from there, the majority of toads split into a bunch of much smaller semi-mobile camps that joined and split, in accordance to whatever understanding or trade agreement or alliance or rivalry their clan might have with other clans. These towns are still around despite how vastly different they are, and three of them are in the territory of a Tower- South Tower is the exception to this, since the southern toad population used to be so heavily intermixed with frogs they lived pretty equally spread inside the same township. Which oof, way to show how things change for the worst in a thousand years.

Pre-Andrias, taxes could be paid in both currency and bulk goods or productions- and they could make that work, because of the seemingly-infinite power source music box battery maintaining all their tech and infrastructure. Frequently, this was how toads paid their taxes- a bit harder to do pure currency payments, as well as y'know not rlly paying property taxes due to not privately owning much land.

(It was also, I want to note, supplemented by raiding rival or enemy clans, because they’re still a martial society- they aren’t peaceful nomads before Andrias fucked up everything, they’re violent and there’s inherent problems with gatekeeping someone from community aspects on the basis of whether or not they've killed something/own a weapon. Which we will get to the owning a weapon thing Also in a bit).

Buttttt after the box was stolen, there were a few policy changes. Taxes were required as coppers- ostensibly to bolster restructuring efforts now that the Calamity tech that was the fulcrum for their ENTIRE INFRASTRUCTURE was burglarized. Coppers hich they don’t have much use for and thus don't have much circulating… yeah. But hey, specifically military service can be offered instead of coppers for taxes, at least for toads and some newts. Doesn't hurt that offering an out from taxes via military enlistment keeps toads and some newts from kicking up a very bloody, very messy fuss while the whole 'I invented speciesism and an oppressive caste system because I'm mad at my girlfriend and boyfriend' thing was being pushed through to law. Between breaking the law with all the severe risk of a nasty punishment/heavy fine that entails, or military service with some Perks of Power for an already highly combative culture? Yeah, no-brainer for why we barely see any non-military toads on screen. (This entire thing is a pretty damn slick move when it comes to enforcing ranks and systems. And admittedly less hamfisted than what we see in modern canon because frankly I think Andrias stopped caring about being careful with his enforcement of it once it became more self-sustaining)

The very messy, very bloody messes did happen, btw. After the last rebellion early into Andrias's reign (mostly made up of toads and frogs working together. Man this just makes it even more depressing to see the state of things in modern eras), only toads that were either in training, currently enlisted, or veterans were allowed to own and carry weapons. Which, beyond the practical problems of 'Amphibia is a dangerous place with lots of things that want to kill, eat, and/or poison you', when toad rites of passage and traditions, up to and including standards for being considered and allowed to act as a legal adult, rely on the use, ownership, or exchange of weaponry and blades... hm. Oh dear.

It's even worse for the frogs btw. Unless a frog somehow ended up actively serving a military term (which they are discouraged to), frogs were disallowed weapons at all. Because de-fanging and controlling who is allowed to be armed is kinda one of the first steps to suppressing and controlling groups of people, with one of the OTHER steps being financially suppressing and controlling (see the taxes thing, upward movement being nearly impossible for frogs and toads). Also contributes to casualties for frogs being way higher than they used to, since if they're a law-abiding citizen and get caught by a hungry predator, or bandits on the road, or any number of things they cant just drive off with pitchforks and slingshots, they're kinda screwed! It's messed up! And it's usually disregarded by newts and toads, because frogs are light on their feet, quite springy, they can just run, yeah?

Fun fact tho, this makes the Plantar basement stash SUPER illegal for some spicy revolutionary reasons. Hell yes good for them.

#bañana post #amphibia #overthinking historical/socioeconomic/infrastructural stuff in a childrens cartoon. cringe is dead and i will keep killing it #good ole combo pressure to conform via hard power and pressure to conform vis soft power wombo combo #i will rag on andrias for fatally stabbing and abusing the trust of and trapping a child to be painfully possessed #but i will rag on him even MORE for a thousand years of oppression because he was mad at his bf and his gf turned against him #for a GOOD REASON TOO

[kirbykonka]

Stone Ocean things I would have liked to see, as a Floridian:

—forgetting that it’s winter because it’s literally 70 degrees. 80 degrees on Christmas isn’t uncommon but it is disappointing every time it happens

—blaming deaths on not just alligators, but also pythons (works well around the Everglades)

—the fashion sense of the characters actually isn’t that far off

—they must say “y’all”

—unless it’s in South FL you’ll be seen as a traitor

—walking outside in summer and being hit with a miasma of mosquitos and heat and moisture that will make you feel like you’re being eaten alive (because you are being eaten alive)

—hitting someone with your car is so easy with wet roads

—FL judicial system is on fleek and after all the crazy shit people do lawyers are so done with us

—strip malls. No one goes there except middle aged mothers shopping for shoes or perfume.

—The real teenage hangout place is Walmart. I am not joking. I have been there many times after school and on weekends and every single time we’d go there were other kids our age.

—we don’t even buy anything most times we just walk around

—everyone is poor af unless you’re south (Miami and the Keys)

—in Miami/Tampa/Jax or any big city people also won’t go to strip malls because there’s a 50/50 on whether or not they get shot up

—we hunt pythons seasonally since they are invasive, you can win prizes for this. I feel like Jolyne and Ermes would enjoy that hobby

—four-wheeling. More of a southern USA thing as a whole, but there are miles of open tracks to take your ATV out to. Very fun with friends where you can race and see who DOESNT stall their four wheeler in a lake

—snakes in the backyard, they’re EVERYWHERE. Could have been so easy for them to chase an albino Burmese python thinking it was White Snake 😭

—toads coming out at the beginning of spring and making every little kid so happy that they have prey again, Emporio is def a frog hunter

—when the toads are hibernating we go after lizards instead, Emporio again is def a lizard hunter

—the monkeys loose in the woods. I’ll let you research that on your own.

—thrift stores are full of winter clothing because of all the northerners who migrate down here, Weather Report must have gotten only those 💀

—you’ll know a prison is nearby because there will be a road sign saying “don’t stop for hitchhikers”

—There is no such thing as a clean beach

—marshland is more common than dirt

—“dirt” here is basically just sand there are zero minerals in it so it’s hella hard to farm

—DUST. EVERYWHERE. BUT ITS ALSO SO HOT YOULL DIE. BUT ITS ALSO WET SO YOULL MELT.

—humidity is constantly over 80%, that means you’re going to sweat no matter what you do

—and for last, the Florida man “memes” aren’t memes at all. That’s actually what people are like here. We have had kids expelled for slashing tires, we have had people arrested for driving gaming chairs, we have had snakes eat people whole.

Florida is literally hell itself.

And we are all so proud to be here.

This has been my Floridian PSA, thank you for reading 🥰

#stone ocean #jjba #jolyne cujoh #jjba jolyne #jjba weather report #jjba ermes #jjba stone ocean #jjba part 6 #jjba headcanons #stone ocean headcannons #florida #jjba memes

[sherlokiness]

The Starks are called horse-faced. That's just a fact. I'm sorry but they're not really up to the standards of Southern beauty that's why even Lyanna was called a "wild beauty". They're not like the Tullys who are considered classically beautiful. And if you want to talk about classism then what about Jon?

Words won't make your mother a whore. She was what she was, and nothing Toad says can change that. You know, we have men on the Wall whose mothers were whores."

Not my mother, Jon thought stubbornly. He knew nothing of his mother; Eddard Stark would not talk of her. Yet he dreamed of her at times, so often that he could almost see her face. In his dreams, she was beautiful, and highborn, and her eyes were kind.

His mother has to be beautiful AND highborn. No commoner mother for Jon with commoner looks.☠️☠️☠️

#the shit I see

[wulvert]

What do your character's voices actually sound like? Are there any already existing characters that sound like your characters? Like what are their accents too?

I'm really awful at coming up with voices for them- i have maybe one for toad and im keeping it to myself bc im cringe.

accents, paperteeth takes place in scotland so most characters there r scottish- id say averys is a very soft edinburghy one ugh its hard 2 say bc thrs a million gazillion scottish accents and i dont go outside enough to actually pinpoint them so ill stop before i reveal how much of a shut in I am. its embarassing. generally, more of the accents ud find in edinburgh and surrounding areas. i think trisha and scarlet both have a slight american twang bc they stay inside and watch american/american dubbed tv shows 99% of the time and its caught on a little bit

its not exactly america idk where on earth triptrack takes place but i picture triptrack more american and i dont know. tex's accent sounds american of some generic flavour- his is also more soft. red more new york???? I dont know oh my god im so sorry. shae im so sorry im i think southern. but thats such a vague word theres probably a million accents that fall under that. applejack my little pony but more generic.

this was the worst answer ever im sorry

for their actual voices aside from accents

i dont know how to describe voices

#asks #should i make a proper wulvert asks tag so ppl can remove me from their life easier

[crow-with-a-knife]

I don’t know what it is about thunderstorms in summer but the second I hear that rain pattering I am outside and suddenly a god-fearing southern american white boy scrounging around the grass and mud for toads with the most country hick voice you’ve ever heard.

#caws of crow #in reality I am a tall goth who looks like a sopping wet cat #while i dig up leaves and grass like a dirt child looking for toads

[sinosauropteryx--prima]

National Fossil: Madagascar

Madagascar is Africa‘s biggest island, and as most of you will know: Islands are strange places with strange animals. This was just as true in the past so there are quite a few interesting contenders for you to chose from.

As always, it could be a fossil that is just exceptionally well preserved and beautiful, had a huge impact on paleontology and our knowledge of the past, is very common/representative of the area, is beloved and famous in the public eye, is just a very unique and interesting find or has any other justification.

Coelurosauravus: First of, we have a small gliding reptile that lived during the Permian, about 250 million years ago. It probably could glide between trees using wings that were spanned open by “bony rods“, which were unrelated to other parts of the skeleton. This is pretty unique, because most other gliding or flying animals repurpose already existing bones into wings (Art by Charlène Letenneur)

Majungasaurus: There are quite a few dinosaurs known from Madagascar, especially from the late Cretaceous. The most famous one of them is probably the up to 8 m long theropod (group of meat-eating dinosaurs) Majungasaurus. Their remains have first been found in the late 19th century (although wrongly assigned at the time), and since then many more fossils have been found, making Majungasaurus one of the better studied theropods in the southern hemisphere (Art by Gabriel Ugueto)

Beelzebufo: Speaking of late Cretaceous - look, it‘s everyone‘s favorite frog, the Devil‘s Toad! Not only has it an objectively awesome name, it is also the biggest known frog of all time. If any frog stands a chance to win one of these votes, I think it‘s this one (Art from Prehistoric Planet)

Archaeoindris: We‘re making a big time jump all the way to the almost-present for the next contestant. Archaeoindris only became extinct around 350 BCE, making it‘s fossil status maybe a bit questionable. However, no group of animals feels more representative of Madagascar than the lemurs, and Archaeoindris was the biggest of all of them - about the size of a male gorilla. Btw, there were many big and strange lemurs that lived in Madagascar until very recently, when another group of primates showed up on the island and changed that (Art by Nix Illustrations).

Aepyornis: Even more recent (up until about 1000 AD), but no less extinct because of us are the elephant birds. Birds becoming flightless and gigantic is a very common thing to happen on islands and this might be the most extreme example of it, with the biggest elephant birds being about 3 m tall and somewhere between 300 and 1000 kg heavy (Illustration by Matt Martyniuk)

#paleontology #fossils #madagascar #majungasaurus #beelzebufo #lemur #elephant bird #coelurosauravus

[devolved-spudgun]

Diner Dungeon

Gary F. Furter:

VC: undecided

28 year old burger flipper at Greasy’s, a small diner on the outskirts of the city. Soon enough, the manager will be retiring, and he gets to own this place if he successfully “removes” their rival, BB’s Diner.  he is the main character.

True Neutral

He is tired, often irritable, and hates his job, but needs to stay to get enough cash for his own apartment (currently he's living with his parents)

Despite being just some diner worker, he is VERY strong, this usually doesn't go well with his grumpy, easily annoyed nature, but in the Diner Dungeon, he can take out his rage on the many enemies that lurk within the Dungeon.

Has a strong enimosity with The Jerk.

Just needs a nap honestly

Overworked

SLIGHT southern accent.

Dating Bob

Smokes cigarettes

Bisexual

Cisgender

Peppino replacement

Bobby Greasespoon:

VC: Larry Needlemeyer (The Amazing World Of Gumball)

26 year old fry cook at Greasy’s, usually stays in the kitchen due to his social anxiety and introverted behavior. Ends up working with Gary to destroy BB’s Diner as well as the expansive labyrinth below. 2nd protagonist in Diner Dungeon.

Lawful good

Nervous, nerdy, and kind of a klutz, but means well.

Very nice to others and loves cooking.

Can go on for hours talking about some random topic. (eg. frogs, strange plants, obscure history, or random indie bands)

LOVES animals, especially toads and frogs.

While in the Dungeon, he befriends Slime, a massive toad who resides in the tower.

They eventually become good friends.

Very supportive and helpful, especially towards gary.

Dating Gary

GAY GAY HOMOSEXUAL GAY

Transmasc

Gustavo replacement

General Stanton:

[NO IMAGE YET, WORKING ON HIS DESIGN SORRY]

VC: Colonel sanders

64 year old entrepreneur/conman, who’s always looking for a deal. He prints out Boss tickets and sells them to Gary so he can fight the bosses. 

Lawful Neutral

Very suspicious.

Parody of colonel sanders

Magician, disappears with your money. 

A truly neutral party, only caring about what he can get from this whole situation. He helps BB's burger, and Gary.

 Runs his fried chicken restaurant outside of the tower.

Used to be a general in the WAR. He did suffer a leg injury, now needing a cane

Heterosexual

Cisgender

Mr. Stick replacement

Frank Fry (A.K.A. FryGuy):

VC: Elvis Presley

39 year old Rockstar. He is a sentient box of fries who plays Punk/Rock n' Roll. He is the boss of floor 1.

Chaotic Neutral

A lot less egocentric than pepperman, but can be pretty vain, and cares about appearances and what others think of him. Keeps pepperman's pretentiousness.

Hates authority and capitalism and all of that.

An actual anarchist, his songs are often about fighting the system and shit.

His musical style is like a mix of 50s greaser and punk rock.

Uses A Little Bit Of 50s Slang

Despite his capitalism bashing, he's very materialistic, and his shows can be pretty costly.

Actually commits crimes, usually vandalism with spray paint.

Has a crush on Boss 2, often committing crimes to get their attention. (They are unaware)

Aesexual, and biromantic.

Cisgender

Pepperman replacement

The Investigator (Real name: Jack Hankshaw)

VC: Spiderman Noir

41 year old detective/Private Investigator. Despite they're humanoid appearance, they are in fact just 2 greaseslimes in a trench coat. They are the boss of floor 2.

Lawful Neutral

Acts quiet, stoic, calm and collected, they are a protector of the noir inspired city district. Behind the almost emotionless Facade, they are actually very emotional, only showing it when alone.

Talented gunslinger.

Most people don't know their identity, or even that they are a greaseslime.

They were inspired by Noir detective films.

Smokes a comically large cigar.

Pays the bottom one (whose name is gravy and he's the snotty replacement) to be the legs of the costume.

Wears monochrome clothes.

Has a crush on Boss 1 that they don't show at all, but in reality gets flustered around him. (Boss 1 is unaware)

Pansexual

Non-binary

Vigilante replacement

THE JERK! (Real Name: Luigi Spaghett)

VC: Mario (The Super Mario Bros. Super Show!)

37 Year old billionaire/soda buisness owner/movie star/celebrity in general. He also commits crimes to make money, and usually never faces consequences due to his high power. He is the boss of flood 3.

Chaotic Evil

Rude, greedy, gluttonous, insane egomaniac who does anything to get what he wants.

Has no sense of fear. Simply doesn't feel it at all. He always has MAXIMUM confidence in Any situation, and never plans.

Despite his diet, and his usual laziness, he has a lot of muscles. He got that wario build.

Absolutely LOVES soda and junk food.

Hypoglycemic

Aroace (unless I'm feeling silly, then he's bi)

Cisgender

Noise replacement

Mabye I will post extra characters LATER

Also last silly thing:

#pizza tower #ocs #pizza tower au #Diner Dungeon (AU) #Uhhhh idk what tags to put

[qqueenofhades]

Off the back of your other great politics/history posts, I was hoping to ask...do you have any insight or explanation into how the hell literal Nazis have had such a resurgence in recent years? I don’t even mean general right-wing or fascist bullshit - sadly we all know that some people have shitty shitty views - but *specifically* Nazism. As in, the Nazi imagery and ideology that every kid in the western world has been taught is Awful. Like, I know a lot of western countries didn’t care about what Nazi Germany was up to in the 1930s, which points to strains of lingering fascism around the world – but post-WW2 Nazi Germany has been the world’s definitive Bad Guy. As a Brit I’ve known kids in the *90’s* get bullied because ‘they’re from Germany and Germany was bad in the war’; from Casablanca to Indiana Jones to the Blues Brothers to Dad’s Army there are literally so many examples in popular culture of how Nazis are evil and stupid (not to mention the oft-quoted American phrase of ‘Europe would be speaking German if it weren’t for us’).

What I’m trying to get at is that throughout the late 20th century, western culture has overwhelmingly been Nazi Germany = Bad, Awful, Evil, Stupid, Had Their Asses Kicked Buncha Losers, and the Allies = Good For Standing Up To The Great Evil Thing (regardless of the nuances of historical reality). So how on earth have we reached a point where so many people see being The Evil Bastards Who Famously Lost as something appealing? And show off the Nazi tropes of as heil signs and swastikas, the most famous symbols of Bad Guys in, arguably, human history? And *then*, to top it all off, claim that they’re patriotically aligning with their countries' proud histories and traditional values...even though their countries famously fought against the people they're now emulating? How do you wrap your heads around the logical disconnect?

(apologies for the long ask, I’m just genuinely flummoxed. I can wrap my head around people falling into right-wing lines of thinking, horrible as that might be. but wanting to be seen as one of those Awful Bad Guys Who Then Were Humiliatingly Beaten Before The Entire World …how do you end up wanting that?)

As you point out, there is an enormous logical disconnect as to how you can end up wanting to associate yourselves with the most obviously Bad Guys Who Got Badly Beaten ever, but that is the poison of white supremacy for you. This mindset also still exists in America: whereas the Confederacy also only existed for five years, got its ass humiliatingly kicked, and lost, the very fact of them losing has been central to its continued mythologizing as the "Lost Cause." They were just innocent noble Southerners, they got mistreated by the evil Yankees, the very fact of them being oppressed by power shows that they didn't do anything wrong, etc etc. You can make endless excuses as to how the actual losing is a good thing, because it means the world wasn't ready for your noble virtues, so on and so forth. But as ever, it is virulent racism, and in the Nazis' case, the ability to so effectively weaponize and institutionalize that racism that they killed literally millions of people. The alt-right desires that same power and effectiveness, and they've been helped by the endless movies that show Nazis as maybe genocidal, but also cool, suave, effective, and fearsome. They want to emulate that general impression, more than being seen as the bunch of mean-spirited incel mass-shooter losers that they are.

Loathsome neo-Nazi toads like Nick Fuentes are also young, have no personal memory or attachment to WWII, and are coming from a generation of aggrieved young white men who are, for the first time, having to contend with the fact that they won't automatically get everything they want just by virtue of being white and male. They are easy to radicalize online, and are able to adopt the Nazi symbolism and mindset without having to seriously reckon with either what that meant or how it was defeated. It is also, as with the Confederacy, to strip any and all historical context from it and just treat it as the ideal institution to enact your beliefs (since after all, the Nazis WERE very good at killing people, even if nothing else). Likewise, their one and only goal is to "own the libs," and since they treat people's outrage over the Nazis as a signal that it's working, they align with the Nazis even more, just to be contrary.

Basically, as with the Confederacy, it's a project of massive historical revisionism and alternate memory, with racism (and the desire to effectively weaponize racism) at the core. They don't care about whether the actual Nazis lost, whether their own country fought against them, etc. It's an appealing way to be seen as "cool" and dangerous, to own the libs, and to effectively put their abhorrent views into practice, so they create a fantasy version of that identity and double down on it even harder every time they're challenged. Which is why we're now in this mess, so.... yeah.

#anonymous #ask #politics for ts #cw racism #cw white supremacy #history #history of racism

[discet]

Amphibia - Scorched Earth AU Questions

Got a couple of these so gonna knock them out in one post

In Amphibia, scattered about as the lowest rung on the species ladder. 

The premise of the AU is as follows

1. Leif does not manage to touch the box and doesn’t get the vision that sets the events of Amphibia in motion 1000 years ago. 

2. Because of this the invasion of Earth goes off as normal, however Andrias is horrified by the destruction and slaughter done to humanity. With his moral compass and support of Barrel and Leif still by his side, he is confident enough to suggest an alternative to his father/the core. The Earth would be mined out as planned, BUT they would treat the humans as another resource to bring back. 

3. Humanity is brought back as a new servile class (reforms by Andrias move Frogs up to a more mercantile/skilled labor class of living, on par with the toad warrior class) and have been the labor backbone of the empire ever since. 

4,The trio are born into the town of Old Saint which is roughly in the same place as Wartwood is in canon. Sprig and Polly(who as descendents of Leif, are nobles in this AU) end up crashing down into on Sprig’s 13th birthday after testing out one of her inventions. 

‘Scorched Earth‘ is not referring to the military strategy, the Earth itself has been scorched. It is an uninhabitable rock a dimension away. Humanity has survived but Earth did not.

House Plantar is the highest ranking frog noble family in the empire. Descended from Arch Duchess Leif Plantar. In short, the Plantars are a family of means, lords of swaths of southern agricultural land. They generally are known for being affable and their close connection to the royal family, 

As for our three favorite frogs specifically, 

Arch Duke Hopediah - Patron of the arts, especially the theater, Hopediash is the current head of House Plantar. Had originally passed on the title to his eldest, but after his untimely death, he took up the title once more until his grandchild Sprig can come of age. Tries to be a good lord but is a little disconnected from common life.

Sprig - Age 13 Heir apparent and good natured, if a tad spoiled. Gets into mischief with his sister around the palace and nightmare to Olivia. Has trouble sitting still for his lesson and generally has dreams of going out on adventures and leaving his responsibilities behind.

Polly - Age 8 A child of many talents, has a zeal for robotics and inventing. Close friends with her brother as their station has distanced them from kids their age. While on the surface the two seem to always bicker and fight, they are as thick as thieves. 

The music box is sitting in the capital powering the empire. It was never taken to Earth. How I think it happens is that after season 1 the girls convince the Boonchuy’s to allow them to do a road trip back to Newtopia  (they would be 15/16 at this point in this AU) to bring Sprig and Polly back home. When they leave they are convinced Sprig and Polly are commoner kids from the capital, so its a big surprise when they arrive only to be accused of kidnapping  and then welcomed into the palace.

So I think the big turn is when Sprig sneaks the girls in to see the magic box as a kind of ‘look at this cool thing.’ and the girls touch it and just absorb the power straight out of the gems and shut down the entire civilization. Like imagine if here in modern Earth if all electricity suddenly just shut off? Cause that’s what  the second half of season 2 and season 3 would explore. 

#Amphibia #Scorched Earth AU #Sprig Plantar #Polly Plantar