unwelljaz

[unwelljaz]

I write in my journal and open the blinds to let the sun in. Winking at strangers and complimenting girls picking at their skin in the washroom mirrors. I slow down and breathe when someone bumps into me and watch him and his new girlfriend walk hand-in-hand with a smile. I look for God,

and pray that the empty sky is just my imagination.

#hell is a teenage girl #girlblogging #this is what makes us girls #girlblog #poetry #poets on tumblr #writers and poets #religious art #tw religious themes #religious trauma #atheism #agnostisizm #agnostic #lana del rey #born to die

[unwelljaz]

quick wip poem before it goes to the journal to never be seen again </3

i envy your keys. 

the keys to your childhood home you put in your pocket every morning before leaving for school, jingling with your keychains. You don’t dare misplace them, they have the luxury of you never forgetting them. They have the luxury of being in your pocket, forever close to you.

i envy your sheets.

the ones that wrap you after a long day, giving you peace and warmth and a sense of serenity. Because I too wished I could wrap my arms around you and give you peace. 

i envy your friends, your family, your neighbours.

they’ll never understand the ache of not having you near. they won’t know what it’s like to search for you in every crowded room.

i envy your God.

Your God who listens to your hopes and dreams and prayers. Your God who omnipotently watches you smile when you trip over yourself, who watches you awake excited for the new day. 

i envy the girls you’ve loved before.

the girls you don’t speak to anymore and have bittersweet memories to, because at least you had a fighting chance at trying.

and one day, i’ll envy your wife.

the woman who’ll never have to worry about the if’s and but’s of your love. the one who’ll make it work, the one who is written for you. 

#girlblogging #heartache #this is what makes us girls #girlblog #missing you #hell is a teenage girl #poets on tumblr #poetry #writers and poets #the tortured poets department #poems

[unwelljaz]

𝐼’𝓂 𝓈𝓉𝒾𝓁𝓁 𝒸𝓇𝓎𝒾𝓃𝑔 𝒷𝑒𝒸𝒶𝓊𝓈𝑒 𝐼 𝓌𝒶𝓈𝓃’𝓉 𝒶𝓉 𝒸𝑜𝒶𝒸𝒽𝑒𝓁𝓁𝒶 𝓉𝑜 𝓈𝑒𝑒 𝒽𝑒𝓇

[unwelljaz]

[unwelljaz]

[unwelljaz]

He didn't want me, time to st4rve !!

#st⭐️rve #hell is a teenage girl #missing you #girlblog #this is what makes us girls #situationships #unrequited love #unrequited feelings #unrequited crush #heartache #skinyyyy #thinspø #lose weight fast

[unwelljaz]

[unwelljaz]

maybe i do deserve better.. and maybe the better i deserve is just myself.

[unwelljaz]

[unwelljaz]

I have this love that's rattling around in my rotten heart and I can't give it to you and it won't stop bouncing and aching. Please be close and please take it from me so I can feel peace.

#lovesick #crush #heartache #heartstopper #hell is a teenage girl #girlblogging #my boy <3 #love #in love #missing you #poetry #poets on tumblr #love poetry

[unwelljaz]

When you're close friend decides to quite literally replace you to the point of using your nickname on a different mutual friend and you want to rip out your hair and scream because what the actual fuck.

No, I don't own you. Yes, you are your own person who is allowed to grow. But that was us not too long ago.

#jealosy #hell is a teenage girl #female rage #female hysteria

[unwelljaz]

Losing weight is not linear!!

do not envy people on here losing 10 lbs in 2 weeks. Some weeks/months/years losing weight is fast and there are weeks/months/years that the number on the scale doesn't move. Relax, fall in love with the process ^^

#tw ed diet #tw ana diary #lose weight fast #weight loss #i need to lose so much weight #st⭐️rve #ed not ed sheeran #thinspø #ana bllog #skinyyyy

[unwelljaz]

No bae, thanks for breaking my heart like that !! It's amazing motivation to st4rve!!

#ed not ed sheeran #tw ana diary #st⭐️rve #tw ed diet #hell is a teenage girl #ana bllog #this is what makes us girls #girlblogging #heartbreak #missing you

[unwelljaz]

[unwelljaz]

[unwelljaz]

Wore baggy clothes and I felt sm better,

it was worth it.

#ed not ed sheeran #tw ana diary #skinyyyy #st⭐️rve #girlblogging #ana bllog

[unwelljaz]

Do it so you can look good in ANYTHING you wear