#[ man oh man i really wanna be productive this month :D ]

[despairforme]

National holiday for FOOLS?? Him.

#[ yes v much HIM ] #[ hellooo guys! hope you're all doing good! ] #[ man oh man i really wanna be productive this month :D ] #[ better start off strong ] #[ happy april fools! uvu/ ] #[ the weather is suuuper nice today so gonna go out later and play volleyball with my s/o ] #[ haven't played for WEEKS since i've been sick so i'm excited!! ] #despair for me. ╱ in character.

[weebsinstash]

Really contemplating the possibilities of yandere Vox but you meet him as his employee

--"this could've been an email" but it's your yandere boss constantly forcing you into unnecessary company Zoom calls which may not be occasionally just the two of you and he may or may not try and make himself look more cool/handsome with some sort of dumb filter or trick of his (and also your coworkers can kinda lowkey tell why they're suddenly getting pulled into calls where your boss is making them cringe trying to make your oblivious ass laugh or something and they all kinda hate you for making their jobs more annoying actually 😅 so then you have Vox potentially being a shoulder to cry on if people are being mean to you--)

Actually, about that office bullying.... something like... you overhear your coworkers in another room or around a corner or something talking shit and making fun of you to the point you start to cry and you turn around and Vox is there watching you totally about to boo hoo baby sob and you like, have to borderline run away from him because you're crying and you're hurting and just want to get away from everyone, but you also don't want to embarrass yourself and make some sort of scene where they'll mock you even more, so you're just, excusing yourself in tears, not even talking to Vox, not even confronting the others.

Here's Vox, just ever so casually popping his head into the room where your coworkers are still mocking you, "hey you guys? :) you're fired! :D and also? Since I own your souls, how about you do as I say aaaaaand go tell Valentino he's allowed to shoot you?" and Vox then goes to comfort you and says the gunshots are "like, a trespasser or something, it's so weird, so, um, anyways, I was thinking maybe you and I could--"

--VoxTek already having or suddenly installing crazy biometric surveillance state level equipment all over their portion of the tower, which includes a security camera in every office/workspace (which of course means there's ESPECIALLY one in yours). This man would be all but drooling over your retina scans, talking about how gorgeous your eyes are, all counting every pore or hair or scale you have on your face in extreme up close detail

--One on one training where if you mention even the slightest interest in something, he's completely indulging you or at least hearing you out. You wanna learn something coding-related? You wanna learn about music production? Oh, you say you have a product idea? And an idea for a commercial for it too? And if you're actually GOOD? If you, at the very least, give him solid ideas to build off of? Now you're getting an even bigger promotion to, say, his executive creator director or something! Maybe he'll invent some new position just for you and absolutely no one in the company will tell you about it because they're threatened with something much much worse than termination if they do

He does want his boo to feel important and special 🥺❤️ like he's a grown man from the 50s, he's older than you no matter what, but especially he's kinda coddling you a little if you're in your 20s or especially young like 18, he's got major cute aggression for you

--You're just in the company break room trying to enjoy your lunch and.... why is the head of the company in here with the normies? Oh, of course it's to sit with you. I can't help but think he probably eats a really shitty, processed, kinda typical modern gamer diet despite having the money to indulge himself, probably does on occasion, but, I can really see him appreciating a home cooked meal and ESPECIALLY if it's by you.

D'ya.... d'ya think he'd just... stick his fork in your lunch... and you wouldn't feel like you could say anything because He's A Fucking Overlord

--Imagine you've been employed like MONTHS before he becomes aware of your presence as an employee and, you started as a barely paid intern or, something real low level, SO low level that, Vox doesn't actually own your soul. So. After several MORE months of buttering you up, really giving you some good raises, some absolutely AMAZING fun times, he's dropping the bomb on you: everyone else at the company has their soul signed over, and you're the only one, and, honey, it's kind of company policy, so--

When I say I would love the idea of Employee Reader just IMMEDIATELY "w wait you wanna... What the fuck do you mean you wanna 'own my soul', why, why the fuck would you-- you know what, nah, I'm, I quit? I quit." And you're literally fleeing the fucking room, potentially having to jump out a window in case Vox has some sort of, lockdown defense mechanism, maybe one to keep angels out, but, you escape, and next thing Vox hears?

"Wait, what do you fucking MEAN 'THEY'RE A SOUND MIXER FOR THE RADIO DEMON NOW'--"

#alastor can mix on my sound til i *static noise sound effect* #yandere x reader #vox x reader #yandere hazbin hotel #hh #sinprompts

[vampstel]

Update #1: I’ve regained my motivation to write!! Although, I’m mostly writing drabbles and AUs of my OCs instead of video scripts— I’ve also been drawing some doodles and practicing art too :D

Nothing all that interesting tbh. I’ve also started organizing again since it’s relaxing + it really helps me out. I started some sort of digital bullet journal to keep track of things I want to do and MAN… I have so much I wanna do but now it doesn’t feel daunting.

My sister recently sent me an article about ADHD and we talked about it. It actually helped out a lot! It’s nice to have a close family member reassure me it’s okay that I’m not as productive as a neurotypical. Oh, and that I should chill every once and awhile instead of beat myself up for being burnt out lol

Other than that, I have nothing else to share. I think my semi-hiatus will be over around next month btw :]

#꒰ v’s rambling ꒱ #• about: personal/miscellaneous #specifically it’ll be over as soon as I settle in the UK #bc it would be super inconvenient if I decided to start making content again in the middle of moving to a different country LMAOO #for now I vibe #and hey: I might just share some of the drabbles and stuff I wrote if y’all are interested >_<

[icarushasfallenfromthestars]

hi!! do u mind if i request? maybe a tommy x reader who’s been struggling recently, with like getting out of bed, doing homework and stuff, and one day she doesn’t respond all day (probably just lying in bed all day or sm) and tommy goes to her house to see what’s up and comforts her and tries to help (even tho he’s lowkey bad at it he can always make u laugh that’s fax) and they kinda have like a ‘self care/help day’ with face masks and movies and unending laughter? thank u so much!!

Oooooo my first writing request! By the way it's written, I assume the reader is a female so that's what is gonna be written! Thanks for requesting!

I accidentally made this a little more dramatic than intended...

I Don't Know What To Do (So I'll Make You Smile) (Plat!Tommyinnit x F!Reader)

He didn't quite understand why you became so... Unmotivated lately. You briefly mentioned that you couldn't drag yourself over to your desk, let alone bring yourself to do the homework your teacher assigned.

Normally he didn't care too much and always said (jokingly) about how you should drop out of school and become a minecraft streamer. He got heavily scolded by Philza for suggesting it though. Normally, though.

Lately he's been taking glances at your report cards when you weren't looking and saw you mostly has C's and D's down the board. You were failing.

At the time, he didn't know how to bring it up or whether or not he should, and asked Philza Minecraft for help on what he should do. Phil explained to him that your mental situation was actually looking pretty bad and he suggested that Tommy go check up on you as soon as possible.

So, like any modern day teen, he texted you way more often than before, anything from asking if you wanted to hang out or stream with him, or sending you some stupid tiktok he found.

At first it was working and Tommy couldn't help but feel proud of himself. But then one day you didn't text him back.

His brain just told him you were busy at that time and left it at that, but then it struck 6pm and he still recieved no response.

A little annoyed by being ignored, Tommy threw on a quick sweater and his shoes before heading to the door. After a quick shout to his mother, explaining that he was heading to your house, he stepped out and walked across the pavement.

Within a few steps, he was standing at your door awkwardly. Normally he would've just burst in with a lame yet some how dramatic greeting to your parents before storming to your room (it happened at least four times a week. They got used to it within the first month.) but now... Something held him back.

Were you okay? Were you ignoring him on purpose? Maybe he was being a bit too dramatic?

Ah. Since when has that ever stopped him?

With a sudden burst of confidence, he grabbed the doorknob and let himself in. Your parents were at work so he made sure to be extra annoying this time, pay back for ignoring him! "I'm breaking into your home!" He yelled dramatically after reaching out and pressing the doorbell a few times to alert his existence even more.

He took his shoes off and made his way to your room, the pathway ingrained into his mind at this point.

When he reached the door, he gave a brief knock (he had manners. Sometimes.) Before turning the knob. "You better be decent for both of our sanity!" He called before finally opening it.

Your room looked... Empty... at first. In the beginning, he thought you weren't home, that is until the blankets began to shift and there was an annoyed groan.

"Soooo dramatiiiiic..." You huffed, unfurling yourself from your cocoon of blankets to glare at him jokingly, but he looked more surprised.

"You look like you got hit with a bus!"

"Well screw you too..."

Tommy snorted before awkwardly sitting on the edge of your bed. "So.. why haven't you been up today? Or... Well.. Passing your classes?"

You were definitely shocked that Tommy noticed, and part of you wanted to joke to ease the tension, but you figured that would make it harder on him. "Well... See... I've been struggling a lot with my mental state and everything just became really stressful, but even then I couldn't do it... And.. Well still can't.."

"Why... Not?" He looked at you in confusion and you just shrugged slightly, running your hand through your bedhead... Which you could see Tommy trying his absolute hardest not to snicker at.

"I don't really feel motivated... I can't even really get out of bed.."

The blond boy gave you an awkward pat on the arm, making you roll your eyes. "Uhhh.. You.. wanna watch a movie? Or... Oh! Maybe we could go egg Wilbur's house while he's off being a simp for Nikki!"

You scoffed and began to laugh into your hand which caused Tommy to greatly relax. "That's hours away, Tommy... We'd never get there before my parents get back. But we can watch a movie?"

"You're no funnnn!" He whined dramatically with a slight hint of a smile before shaking his head, "Go at least brush your hair while I find a movie, it looks like a porcupine got struck by lightening."

You rolled your eyes and slowly began to shuffle out of bed to make your way to the bathroom while Tommy turned on the TV in your room, having been here enough times that he knew how to use it.

When you came back, mostly cleaned up with a sweater thrown over your pajamas, you saw Tommy putting on one of his favourite comedy movies. There was also some snacks he had probably raided your kitchen or secret candy stash for, but you didn't mind. You flopped back down into your bed, while Tommy hit play.

"I never under stand why women always make such a bit deal over pulling those face mask things off of their face!" Tommy gestured to the scene that was playing in the movie. "Also why do they need so many face products? Doesn't water and dish soap do the trick?"

"You do NOT use dish soap on your face!" You gaped at his response to the movie. "And trust me... Those peel masks hurt." You saw Tommy roll his eyes for a moment before you got an idea. "Wanna try?"

The teen looked at you as if you were high on glue, but then he saw the challenging look in your eyes, and everyone knows that Tommy Big Man Innit NEVER backs down from a challenge. Or maybe he knew it would make you happy? "It can't be that bad!"

You knew he was gonna regret that.

You paused the movie while you scrambled to get your skin care products ready. First you made him wash his face, moisturize, etc etc, which he complained about non stop, but you always told him to quit whining or he was admitting to losing against the woman in the movie. He instantly quit complaining, calling the actress and pansy and hell bent determined to prove himself as an alpha male.

You made him put his hair back with a cheap headband you had, which caused his blond locks to practically flare out in every direction. After laughing about it for a minute, you made him sit down so you could paint the mask on.

"Sit still!"

"But it feels weird!"

"Keep quiet or this brush is going up your nose!"

"You wouldn't DARE."

"Wanna bet on it?"

After about five minutes of even more whining, you finally got the masks painted on you both as Tommy decided to take a picture of himself for Twitter to meme about.

Tommyinnit

Women are weird with their face skin care stuff...

While you both waited for the masks to dry, you had some how convinced Tommy to let you paint his nails but ONLY if he could do yours as well. We all know Tommy isn't about that toxic masculinity.

Once it was dry, you could see Tommy scrunching his face repeatedly, most likely not used to the unusual feeling. "Can I take this off now? I'm determined to prove myself better than those actors!"

You bit your lip to hide your grin as you gave a nod. Because yours was also dry, you showed him how to find an edge and how to pull it off.

"Ow! What the hell!?"

You snickered as you watched Tommy begin to yelp in pain as he began to pull the mask off, only able to do tiny tiny little bits at a time before needing a moment to gather himself, eyes watering.

You, being a boss, were already majority of the way done pulling the face mask off causing Tommy's jaw to d r o p. "You're a literal hell spawn! How are you not bawling your eyes out from the pain?!"

"I've done this quite a lot of times honestly. It's not that bad." You lied through your teeth. Honestly it hurt quite a lot, but you were just enjoying seeing Tommy gawk at you before trying to peel the mask off more, only to yelp and whine.

It took twenty minutes, and eventually, he got the product off and stared at his reddened face in the mirror. He decided to take another picture (with permission) for Twitter with you being a smug little shit while his eyes were still watery and his skin still irritated.

Tommyinnit

I respect women even more now...

(Yourusername)

@/tommyinnit Wimp.

#tommyinit mcyt #tommyinnit x reader #tommyinnit x y/n #dream smp #tommyinnit #mcyt #mcyt x reader #platonic x reader

[interstellar-changkyun]

being students together (ot7) :

shownu | son hyunwoo

he’s in your economics class and yeah you are super intimidated by him

he’s quiet and handsome and tall and he’s a music production major but he’s taking a high level economics class FOR FUN so he’s smart too

basically all the girls in the class love him and the guys look up to him

you haven’t talked to him all semester but then you’re paired together for the final project

“Hello I’m Shownu, you’re y/n right?” he came up to you after the pairs were announced you were surprised he knew who you were you just nodded and he asked for your number to talk about when to meet and you gave it to him without hesitation

Shownu was all business and you seriously doubted he even liked you

over time you had grown even more fond of him, he was kind and caring and definitely not the scary tough guy you thought he was

you were one year younger than him and he teased you about it pretty often but you didn’t mind especially since shownu insisted on paying for all the snacks you bought while working on the project

finally when you were done he said, “we’re finally done, let me treat you to meat kid” and you definitely liked being younger now

when you went to eat there was a group of drunk guys at a table nearby being rowdy

shownu, despite his big appetite, made sure to pace himself so you could eat properly

it only occurred to you when he literally stopped eating to watch you eat and maybe you were blushing

as you were about to get up to leave the group of men came up behind you, “hey beautiful why don’t you come with us instead.” you cringed at the slurred voice and turned around to glare only for the man to lean in towards your face, inches apart you could smell the alcohol on their breath

almost instantly shownu was standing up and walking over to your side of the table they cowered away as he moved to stand in front of you, you got up then getting ready to pull him back

“i would leave if i were you” shownu said sternly and it made you remember just how intimidating he was they scurried away after that and he turned towards you, his body still tense

“i- thank you shownu” you couldn’t express how happy you were he was here and how kind he was and he seemed confused by your expression, you looked ready to cry tears of gratitude

“don’t mention it, seriously i’d do it again any day”

you expected shownu to stop sitting next to you in class or meeting you between classes after your project ended but he didn’t, instead he became apart of your friend group, still quiet and talking only to you

then he introduced his other friends they were all music production majors but they were fun and shownu loved them like brothers they joined your group too

after a random guy from your class asked you out shownu realized just how much you meant to him and asked you out

wonho | shin hoseok

let’s be real he’s intimidating asf

but wonho’s the sweetest man alive

he would definitely sit next to you because you’re pretty and then be too shy to talk to you

he blushes when he sees you and when you smile he can’t help but stare

you never notice despite him being right there and stare at him too but he never catches you

your best friend, changkyun, who walks you to class every day notices him watching you as you enter and he’s sure wonho likes you so he tries to prove it

“what if i just ask you out one day?” you smack his shoulder and he yelps in pain

“he doesn’t like me so if you want to embarrass yourself then yeah go for it?”

“maybe i have a humiliation kink.” changkyun wiggles his eyebrows and you just roll your eyes but sure enough the fucker does it the next day waiting a couple seconds for you to take your seat before walking up to you

“y/n i was wondering if you want to get dinner with me i really like you?” changkyun was a good actor you had to give it to him, wonho couldn’t believe this kid but he really hoped you would say no

“i’m sorry i like someone else actually.” you couldn’t think of anything else to say and you immediately regretted it

“oh do you mind if i ask who?” you were gonna kill changkyun you glared at him but could feel wonho looking at you both so you regained your composure

“i-it’s personal” your gaze flitted to wonho and sure enough he was looking at you, you blushed instantly

“i understand no worries.” changkyun said and walked away knowing his work was done

“that was awkward huh? sorry you had to witness that.” you said to wonho without looking at him, trying to cool your cheeks

“it’s okay you deserve better anyways.” his voice was so soothing and you decided you had to be bold or you would regret it forever

“like you?” you looked at him now and he looked so shocked but he was blushing too

“yeah exactly like me.” he smiled a bright grin and you knew you were head first falling for him

kihyun

definitely the intimidating but annoyingly smart student that argues with everyone

you don’t mind being quiet and unassuming in class but today is discussion day and you actually liked the assigned reading

Kafka’s Metamorphosis made you excited about reading again so you decide today will be the day you wrack up on participation points

“Okay class lets start off with an open-ended question as we do: does anyone want to share what they thought about the reading?” The professor asked and there was a couple beats of silence before you raised your hand and she called on you

“Personally I really liked how the salesman describes the events of his metamorphosis so matter-of-factly and it gave insight into his general outlook on society.”

“I would argue the events of his transformation made him numb and traumatized him so much that he became nihilistic.” Kihyun was talking to you now, looking at you with his sharp eyes and you couldn’t deny your cheeks flushed under his stare

and then you two started arguing with each other across the lecture hall forgetting there were other people there until the professor cut in, “kihyun and y/n while your discussion is riveting let’s give others a chance to add in,” you huffed and looked away from kihyun not missing his smirk, did he think he won?

when class ended you decided you had to set the record straight, no way in hell were you backing down you stalked over to where he was packing up his laptop

“i hope you don’t think you won,” your were arms crossed and your cheeks were still flushed from the heat of the moment

“no you were right i just kept it going because you look cute when you’re angry,” you closed and opened your both in incredulity

“well then ask me to get coffee and we can argue some more,” you still feigned anger and his smirk turned into a grin and he did just that

you and kihyun’s first d(eb)ate was the same day you properly met and he couldn’t help but squeeze your red cheeks when you were done arguing and you let him walk you to your dorm and kissed him goodbye

minhyuk

class clown and kinda intimidating too

all the girls in your class are in love with him and you thought he was cute but you had always been in a relationship and you wouldn’t be swayed be anyone besides your partner

he’s funny, cute, smart, and sweet but definitely not interested in any of you nor does he notice the attention

but then you’re breaking up with your partner and you don’t let them see you cry, they had cheated on you after all they don’t deserve your emotions now

you run off to the library, sat down in the old reference book aisle that no one ever checks but you weren’t lucky it seems because lee minhyuk is walking through the aisle until he sees you on the ground and crying

he squats down in front of you, “do you wanna get something to eat?” he doesn’t ask if you’re okay because that’s a dumb question and it makes you giggle because you were hungry and dehydrated from all the crying so you just nod and let him lead you to an empty diner near campus

he orders you fries and a milkshake, strawberry, coincidentally your favorite flavor, and you feel better as you both eat in silence

minhyuk is funny and sweet making you forget about your day, for a while and then you’re telling him what happened and he’s sympathizing, “what’s his name i wanna beat this guy up?!” minhyuk is not intimidating you learn he’s actually just a softie and you make a great friend that day

minhyuk knows you’re not ready for a relationship but he’s always there for you after that day and months later when you get fries and a milkshake like that first day he tells you he wants to date you and you just kiss him square on the lips

hyungwon

quiet, smart, respectful boy but also sleepy

he always comes in with a 24 oz americano and your class wasn’t THAT early so you couldn’t help but notice the large drink

then you notice how adorable and handsome he is and maybe when you stare off into space during lecture your eyes always land on him, but alas you’re both too quiet to approach each other

one day he comes in without coffee and he falls asleep during lecture but you feel bad because the professor just announced details about the midterm and he definitely missed all of it

so after class you stand up and go to his still sleeping form and poke him a couple of times and he groggily says “wha-what’s happening?” and then he’s blinking and sitting up straight with wide eyes

“uhm you fell asleep and class ended but you just missed all the midterm details so i can email you the details or quickly tell you all of it?” you couldn’t help but giggle at his appearance and you desperately wanted to fix his messy hair

“oh uh- thank you do you mind just walking with me?” he was clearly still disoriented but you agreed since you didn’t have another class for a couple of hours

you and hyungwon walked to the nearest library on campus and you told him everything you could remember and he thanked you profusely

“i never sleep in class but today i didn’t have coffee and ugh i’m so grateful thank you,”

“i noticed,” you don’t know why you said that but hyungwon smiled a lazy and soft smile and you decided you wanted to get to know the caffeine addicted tall boy

the next lecture he brought you a cup of coffee too and sat next to you and as you became friends it wasn’t soon after he asked you out

jooheon

like minhyuk he’s the smart class clown but also intimidating

he jokes around with the professors like he knows the entire content of the course and he’s so smart he probably does

one day you’re late to lecture and the only seat left is next to him and he gives u a nod as u sit down

you’re struggling to stay awake and when your head falls out of your hand it’s resting in slightly jooheon is giggling next to you

“hey you can sleep i’ll take extra good notes for you,” and you could cry from gratefulness but instead you just give him a smile and rest on your arms and then he’s waking u up and giggling at your grogginess

it’s the first time you see his dimples and you feel like an arrow shot through your heart and you must be half conscious because you can’t seem to control your body as you outstretch a hand and poke one of his dimples

he’s shocked but just laughs and his dimples deepen impossibly and you’re apologizing and he just says, “you can poke my dimples any time,” and well you just tell yourself you’re still sleepy even though your entire body feels awake now as you do it again and his eyes vanish as he smiles

you’re definitely whipped and he is too and it’s only until one of his friends notices you two being annoyingly oblivious of your feelings for one another and says, “yah just ask them out already!” to jooheon do you two actually start to date

he takes you bowling and you’re grossly whipped for each other

I.M | im changkyun

the type of hot and intimidating you would never approach him but just stare at him from a distance

sits behind you in class and rarely talks but when he does you shiver just from how deep his voice is

you sit next to your friend and they constantly tease you about how reactive you are just to his voice alone

one day you’re running late and rushing through campus and when you finally make it to your lecture hall you’re almost late so you stumble on the steps to your chair and fall

a all too recognizable voice says, “are you alright?” and then he’s kneeling in front of you and giving you his hand to help you up and your hand is oh so cold but his is so warm and so are your cheeks now because he’s staring right at you

“yes thank you,” and you’re stumbling as you stand up so he naturally grabs your arms with both hands to steady you and you’re so sure your blush is out of this world and changkyun feels like he might have just fallen for you right then and there

after that he notices you more and more until he can’t stop seeing you everywhere what feels like all the time

when he sees you in his favorite cafe in what is his usual seat he just mumbles “fuck it,” and takes the seat right opposite from you and you’re sure you’re imagining it, maybe all the caffeine was battling the lack of sleep and you were losing it

“you know we haven’t properly met,” changkyun introduces himself and you give up on your homework as you begin talking to him, after a while you don’t find him intimidating any more and revel in just how easy he is to talk to

as you’re walking out of the cafe he walks you to your dorm and your hands are cold as you desperately try warming them up, even resorting to blowing on them, and he notices and takes both of them in one hand and puts them in warm pocket and you feel yourself falling headfirst for the seemingly edgy truly soft boy

#monsta x imagine #changkyun #monsta x #mx #changkyun imagine #shownu imagine #kihyun imagine #jooheon imagine #hyungwon imagine #changkyun blurb #hyungwon imagines #minhyuk imagine #monsta x minhyuk #wonho imagine #monsta x scenario #monsta x wonho #monsta x im #wonho #monsta x shownu #monsta x kihyun #jooheon

[plounce]

what if gay CATS........... were gay PERSONS

(info on this au under the cut)

theyre all shitty young adults just kind of. getting through their early 20s as best they can. or as much as they can. maybe things will get better someday, but right now they’re kind of spinning their wheels

magic exists but like eh it’s not a big thing don’t worry about it. it’s around but like whatever. not many people have it and it’s mostly just like. a curiosity or a party trick

demeter and bombularina are together, tugger and mistoffelees are together, bombularina and tugger occasionally fwb, it’s cool and aboveboard and it’s all fine

demeter:

bisexual with a preference for women. 24 years old

semi-psychic (not as powerful as tantomile or coricopat). tends to have vague and confusing prophetic dreams

dropped out of grad school for sociology due to trauma and ensuing intensified mental illness. kind of bitter about it, but tries to get through every day. general anxiety disorder even before all that

very nervous around most men she doesn’t know & trust

currently working at a barnes & noble starbucks, which sucks. she recently became the assistant manager, which turbo sucks because now she has more work for only like a buck raise, but at least she’s getting reliable shifts

her go-to therapy is cutting her hair with scissors. her hair is fried to all hell from regular bleaching

she’s learning how to crochet because she’s decided she needs to do something physically productively creative with her hands to distract herself from Stuff

bombalurina:

bisexual. 24 years old

got her bachelor’s in english two years ago and hasn’t found a job in her field and has kind of given up on it for now

she’s been bartending for like four years, does freelance editing work on the side. will occasionally write listicles for clickbait sites if she needs extra cash

literally any extra money she can save goes to tattoos. her right sleeve’s almost done

has natural red hair but dyes it cherry red

a hedonist to cope but is also just a natural hedonist. likes a good bath

i know that like the typical thing fandoms say about female characters is “doesn’t take shit” for the girlboss points but she truly does not take shit anymore. she used to take people’s shit sometimes but at this point in her life she’s tired and she has a girlfriend to be protective of. she has a couple people whose shit she will take (mostly just tugger) but besides them (and having to practice basic customer service to keep her job) she’s tired of other people’s shit! enough!

my personal take on bombalurina is a mix between the riot grrrls of the 90s and 80s punk girls, and then a dash of the greaser chicks from grease. i saw that spiked collar and my brain went OH okay i can run with this somewhere fun. same for demeter, but less so - she just has the piercings.

demelurina:

bombalurina met demeter in college at a women’s activism club, noticed her because of her dimple piercings and was like “oh someone else with a lot of metal in her face, i’ll sit next to her”

they were each other’s first off-campus roommates and were close friends. made out a couple times, but it was mostly a lot of sexual tension. there was a lot of bombalurina staring at demeter while she or demeter made out with someone else

demeter was on and off with her high school boyfriend munkustrap and bombalurina was like “oh he’s so much more stable/calm than me and she needs that, i party a bit too much for her, i shouldn’t try anything” so she just sort of. lets their almost-there peter off

(this is all bombalurina’s internal thoughts - demeter always was interested in her, but thought she was too boring for bombalurina. so neither of them thought they could pursue it)

bombalurina graduated and moved somewhere cheaper further away from campus. they kind of drift apart

munkustrap and demeter peter off and he moves away for a job (they’re still good friends, it was a very amicable breakup) and then demeter gets with macavity, which is a deeply toxic situation for her and sucks hugely and throws her whole life really off track. won’t go into further details

she finally manages to break up with him and calls bombalurina at like 2 am asking if she can pick her up, and also if she can sleep on her couch, it’s okay if that’s not okay, she just. really needs a place she feels safe, and her gut is telling her to. and of course bombalurina says yes

bombalurina also knew macavity and had also made out a couple times with him at like parties and stuff (see: staring at demeter as she makes out with people). something about transference of feelings - bombalurina was into him for a couple moments because he and demeter had a thing.

this is due to me interpreting the song “macavity” as actually about bombalurina wanting to fuck demeter and her singing as a half-repressed expression of that. i use my really good wlw brain to reach that conclusion. it’s kind of a non-competitive version of eve sedgwick’s take on the love triangle. (<-- normal thing to say)

but anyway demeter stays on bombalurina’s couch and she tries so hard to stay on track but eventually she just has to drop out. bombalurina helps her with that too. she’s just really supportive even as demeter’s life is at its lowest point. when she gets home from bartending she gets demeter to go to sleep

she just Stays with her and makes her smile and reminds her that her life isn’t over, there’s still things in her day to enjoy, to keep her trudging forward

bombalurina is roommates with tugger at this point - he also recently dropped out and demeter knows him because he’s munkustrap’s brother, so he’s Trusted and also is like “hey it’s okay that you dropped out, im here and im chilling and you like me and respect me at least a little, and you have a bachelor’s degree at least!” (more on him later)

demeter is like “oh god ive been crashing at their place for so long not paying rent, theyre gonna ask me to leave, im such a freeloader, they wont take my attempts at paying rent” but then bombalurina and tugger are like “hey! the lease is almost up! we found a pretty good 3 bedroom, do you wanna have your own room for real?” and she nearly cries because 1. the RELIEF 2. oh my god you want me around???

cut to bombalurina helping demeter put together an ikea dresser (tugger got banished to the kitchen to make crystal light lemonade for them because he’s useless with a screwdriver) and demeter has two epiphanies:

1. i thought i was ready to d*e four months ago and here i am making a dresser to put clothes into in my new apartment where i live and feel safe and loved. im still not happy but im still alive and im making a dresser

2. holy fuck im back in love with my best friend, and ten times more than i was back then.

so she like kind of freaks out because she’s already imposed so much on bombalurina, how could she impose her FEELINGS on her like this, oh no oh no oh no

meanwhile bombalurina’s back in love with her even MORE and she’s also like no... she’s already dealing with so much... i don’t want to make her uncomfortable or feel unsafe in her own home especially after her recent relationship trauma... i just want her to feel safe around me...

you might think tugger as their roommate would be like “JUST KISS” but he is in fact pretty oblivious because he is self-absorbed. mistoffelees on the other hand..

eventually they do have a big confession of feelings after demeter has a bad day and it’s very dramatic and they make out in the rain. and it’s like. well this is a movie scene. but also im cold and damp. let’s head inside our home and get warm and dry :)

and then they go inside and and talk through everything, all their feelings (not just their romantic feelings but like ALL their feelings) and their shared histories and bombalurina is like “do you think you’re... ready for a relationship right now? like that would be a good thing for you?”

and demeter considers it. she does stop and think. and then she says, “with anyone else... probably not. but it’s you. and i feel so safe around you, and we’re already so close. you make the future feel more worth it. you make more days alive feel not just tolerable, but something to look forward to. and knowing you’ve loved me all this time... it’s nice. it’s good. i’m - i’m understating it so much, it’s more than nice, it’s just - it’s a lot. i wish i had noticed back then.” “hey, hey, don’t blame yourself. i’m the one who never said anything.”

anyway. everything works out, and they start dating for real :)

tugger:

bisexual. 22 years old

dishwasher at the same bar bombalurina works at. she got him the job. he keeps bugging her to teach him bartending tricks and on slow nights she will agree to

he dropped out of their four year, but he managed to secure an associate’s in communications before he dipped

trying to be an ig influencer hotboy and hopefully get modeling jobs from that but his phone’s camera sucks shit so his account isn’t really going anywhere. but he continues to post his low resolution shirtless selfies

trying to cope with being the failure son who does not have a fancy nonprofit job with a salary and healthcare by being self-absorbed and self-aggrandizing

it works about 60% of the time and 60% of the times that it doesn’t he’s able to hide it

he dropped out right around when bombalurina graduated and he was like HEY! ARE YOU LOOKING FOR A ROOMMATE WHO DOESN’T CARE IF WE LIVE TEN MILES AWAY FROM CAMPUS? WELL HAVE I GOT A SOLUTION FOR YOU: ME!

to which bombalurina (who has fooled around with him here and there and thinks he is funny little man and genuinely goodhearted, and also he has rockin abs as a plus) says munkustrap already asked me if i need a roommate and if i do to consider you, because you don’t want to move back home. in other words: yes, you little idiot

they do fool around with each other but they are both very understanding that it is strictly platonic and for fun, especially once they become roommates. they both do not desire each other for anything serious

he did have a bit of a crush on each other when they met (hot punk older girl who’s friends with his brother) but 1. it dissipated pretty quick after they fooled around for the first time because it was not a very serious crush 2. she was in the middle of being in love with demeter so she was focused on that, emotionally

he got his ears pierced a couple times in high school but bombalurina inspired him to get a couple more. she went with him when he got his nose pierced

demeter has always understood that him and bombalurina are strictly fwb, has never been an issue.

she and him like to bleach their hair together when their hair schedules line up (he bleaches his way less often then she does), but she refuses to use his fancy conditioner that keeps his hair unfried because it’s expensive, even though he tells her to go ahead and use it, please, the health of her hair is giving HIM anxiety, demeter please. please demeter

mistoffelees:

gay. 20 years old

has magic. it’s pretty good magic but again: magic is not a big deal in this concept

a bit spooky. skulks around. a bit of a bitch but also very very nice. chooses when to speak

he has postings on craigslist and fiverr about finding lost objects and people with magic. like a gig economy private detective

side job is a waiter at a fancy restaurant

sometimes he gets paid VERY well from the private detecting, depending on the client. he does ask his psychic friends (tantomile & coricopat) to give a quick glance over on some of the more suspicious clients just to make sure he isn’t finding someone who should not be found by that person.

doesn’t go to college. is roommates with his sister victoria, who’s a freshman and studying dance. moved into town with her so she wouldn’t have to live in the dorms by having a guaranteed roommate.

tuggoffelees:

the general vibe i want for these two is mistoffelees walking around town or driving around in his shitty toyota camry while tugger tags along because he’s bored and thinks this is cool as shit

the general tone of the au is “magic isn’t a big deal” except for tugger, who thinks mistoffelees’ magic and his magic freelancing is the coolest shit ever. this is mostly because he just likes mistoffelees. “there are people who can do cooler shit than me, tug” “yeah but i don’t KNOW them also theyre not as COOL as you” “you had to explain to me how instagram reels work”

idk how they met i just think tugger shows up at his and bombalurina’s apartment one day (this is when demeter has moved in but they havent moved to the 3br yet) with this dude to dash in and pick something up and bombalurina is like “uh. who’s this” “oh this is mistoffelees he’s SO GOOD AT MAGIC” [mistoffelees nods hello] “okay bye bombalurina see you at work!!!” “uh. later”

after that he just shows up a lot. sort of ambiguous if theyre dating or what for a while before bombalurina straight up asks like “hey does the dude you’re dating know we fool around” “the dude im - what?” “... the little magic guy who keeps using our hot cocoa mix. misty.” “oh. uh. we aren’t dating.” “... do you want to? because you’re kind of all over him constantly” “um. well! haha, if i wanted to, i could! haha!” “yeah get back to me on that”

tugger trying to use his ig clout to get mistoffelees more work even though 1. he has no clout 2. mistoffelees has a very stable client base. but mistoffelees appreciates the effort. the self-promo guy promoing someone other than himself... the highest expression of love...

mistoffelees is A Nonthreatening Man plus he’s pretty obviously gay so demeter is chill around him pretty quickly. when mistoffelees is over they’ll sit on the couch where demeter sleeps and watch documentaries quietly while she crochets

they both occasionally say spooky shit at the same time because magic stuff. bombalurina and tugger are both torn between “that was cool as fuck” and “god that’s unnerving”

just a lot of tugger following mistoffelees around on his jobs and mistoffelees letting him because he’s fond of him and them occasionally getting into minor peril and interesting shenanigans, but it is 90% fetch quests

i think the first time they met tugger was taking selfies in front of a hydrangea in a public park and he saw mistoffelees walk up with a shovel and start digging in one of the flower beds and he thought he was hot so he went over and offered to take over on the shoveling to look strong and masculine and he ended up digging up a skull, which mistoffelees picked up and said “thanks” and then walked away

mildly terrifying but also very interesting and tugger’s days are kind of boring and dishwashing kind of sucks as a job to do like every night and he is a person who thrives on novelty so. moth to a porchlight

i think they do start making out for fun here and there and then a while later theyre out on one of mistoffelees’ jobs and someone asks “who’s the guy with you” and mistoffelees replies “oh that’s my boyfriend, don’t worry about him” and then it’s like. “HUH? I’M YOUR BOYFRIEND?” “uh. yeah? i assumed. is that okay?” “i mean yeah of course i think you’re great! how long have we–” “oh like a while.” “oh. uh. cool!!”

they just hang out a lot. mistoffelees enjoys teasing him and enjoys his warmth and bombasticity and tugger likes watching and helping him solve little mysteries around the county because it’s always something new. they’re kind of a comedy duo. they just enjoy spending their time together and following mistoffelee’s internal magic gps to find lost dogs and lost necklaces

yeah right now this au is just vibes and just sort of. continuing forward with your days and your weeks and your months. just young adults hanging out

#cats the musical #mr mistoffelees #rum tum tugger #demeter cats #bombalurina #tuggoffelees #demelurina #chirps #bird in the hand

[organic-guacamole]

showtime

episode 211 let's go

ok first of all, this is the second to last episode guys... I don't even wanna think about how much pain I'll be in after next week's episode

mr mazzara doing the recap-

this is so weird to me and I don't know why

WHY DIDN'T YALL JUST ASK BENJAMIN FOR HELP, THATS LITERALLY HIS THING

is Nini giving out the cards a callback to season 1 when Natalie Bagley said that Nini gave her a card or something on opening night of another musical?

STEPHY AS THE ENCHANTRESS OMG YES

Ricky in the crown gives me Harry styles in that photoshoot vibes

he's so pretty.

ok but why did we never see Ricky and Ashlyn interact before? it's been like 5 seconds and I already love how they bounce off each other and it's just so natural

OH THEY REALLY DON'T HAVE ANY UNDERSTUDIES-

well that explains a lot...

so Ricky fell on top of Ashlyn and all that broke for both of them was their wrist-

insert Jake Peralta *coolcoolcoolcoolcoolcool no doubt no doubt no doubt*

of course howie was amazing as the beast, were we expecting anything less??

Ricky is so beautiful and I will not shut up about it....

let me enjoy this before the makeup crew slaps mud on his face.

Nini and Ricky talking to eachother? in a civil manner? wasn't she avoiding him just in the last episode? hm ok

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH THEY CANT EXPRESS THEIR FEELINGS JUST LIKE ME HAHAHAHAHA THIS IS HILARIOUS, WHATS NEXT? THEY CUT EVERYONE OFF CUZ THEY CANT HANDLE EMOTIONS? ...ha

yes Kaden and Rico, my favourite east high boys 🥰

I mean....where's EJ?

THERE HE IS

EJ AND GINA IN THE BACKGROUND... doing something idek

KOURTNEY'S MOM IS BACK YAY

Howie is a shining star, ofc ofc

the smallest fOrk

can't wait to see the fork burst into song about how she deserves more than to be used to eat salad😌

the duster and the bluster.... ok😃

hi Gina!

hi- oh wow I didn't know Robbie Rotten was in this show!!!!!

the portwell look.

that my friends, is a married couple's look✋

GOSH EJ WHAT DID THEY DO TO YOU

aww Gina's so excited for this

D word?

Die?

Delicious?

Dom Toretto?

"good, clean fun all alone with someone I dig...a lot"

sir that does not sound very clean to me

SEBLOS

Seb looks so cute standing there next to pope Carlos

DID THEYEY REALLY LIGHT ANTOINE ON FIRE-

I NEED TO SEE THAT

Seb's reading Carlos better than big red read the script in episode 102, this is great development after the "fight"

Kourtney really just made the best outfit for herself and let the rest of them suffer

the way Gina immediately goes to hold on to EJ after the announcement

"tonight we're going to put the U in UTAH"

...

"hey where are you from?"

"TAH"

SEB'S SINGULAR CLAP KILLED ME-

he's officially salt lake city's resident thanos

just wity clapping because for some reason I have a feeling he doesn't know how to snap his fingers...don't ask why

Ms Jenn do you mind encouraging your leads before the show? idk just an idea

pepto bismol product placement smhsmh

those flowers are bigger that big red himself-

*bops along to the opening theme*

that whistle at the end slaps everytime

WHY IS THE AUDIENCE SO MASSIVE

I guess they're all here to see Ms Jenn go on as a fork after Nini decides to *go her own way*

wow i am so funny

so they couldn't do many group scenes cuz of covid, but this 300 person crowd is cool? nice

OO THE VIOLIN GIRL FROM EPISODE 6 IS IN THE ORCHESTRA

HOWIEEEEEE

"Mr Caswell", he said, in the loudest voice possible while backstage at a show that's about to start.

Mazzara what are you trying to pull-

I usually like Benjamin but I don't like his tone

"iS yOuR wHoLe FaMiLy HeRe?" LIKE YOU DON'T ALREADY KNOW THATS A SOFT SPOT FOR EJ

"we've had some good conversations these past few weeks"

right so what's going to happen after you graduate?

what does he think of you not going to Duke?

what did he say about you giving the sweatshirt that's been in the family for 3 generations to a girl you're not even dating?

good old Mr. M

therapist Mr. Mazzara, they all need it.

start with Ricky though.

"Michael Bowen"

dude why did you shave, now you look less like "hot lumberjack" and more "creep at the gas station"

OH-

does she not like Mike anymore?

why does it sound like jennzzara started dating and now they just sit back and talk smack about everyone in their freetime

break the fourth wall-

uhhhh im scared

why am I scared

he's scary

hehe flowers for Ricky, obviously for Ricky, ObViOuSLY

oh boy poor Michael

this man is in love, rip

why does Ms Jenn always look at people with her eyes open so wide

LILYYYY

I'm only excited because I really like the idea of lily and Ricky being friends, nothing more.

ha this guy's got jokes

a MOAT AROUND THE SCHOOL

wheeze

also he's very pretty.

"the wolves and very talented humans"

how dare he forget to mention the very talented wolves and normal humans, smh erasure

"being nice, what a concept" ted talk by Lily who still doesn't have a last name

did she just say lol out loud

same with the hug emoji last episode-

go touch some grass babes

the way he didn't say no, but said he didn't know how the east high kids would react-

not saying he does want to date her but that's an interesting thing to think about, also another thing to write an essay analysis on just to leave it in my drafts for a few months

awww lily genuinely trying to help him

sorry guys, I've been taken by the Lily charm (didn't know it existed until now but oh well)

REMEMBER WHEN I SAID I'LL NEVER SHIP PORTWELL?

just look at me now

the Lily wink I can't she's so cute-

HELP ME I'M BEING HELD HOSTAGE BY LIL-

David Attenborough?

oh nvm it's Benjamin narrating the show in a really weird British accent for some reason.

STEPHY GOT MORE LINES YAY GOOD FOR HER

also is this to show that Nini doesn't care about being the star of the show anymore? the way she's supporting everyone else even though she's a fork?

I would pay for a special of the full musical ngl

OOO THE TRANSFORMATION WAS SMOOTH

shockingly

yo where did the makeup come from

man I wish I was a theatre kid

THIS IS STEPHY'S EPISODE NOW IDC✋

my girl is starring

"needs an X-factor"

Simon Cowbell creeps in

"it's a yes from me"

and them boom, he takes Nini and mistreats her horribly and then she comes back to theatre after deciding music isn't for her👍

"I thought she just hog-tied him?"

don't ask sebby, it's better if you don't know.

imagine they spotlight the wrong person and this dude is just some random person that likes writing down stuff during shows.

Ms Jenn just let them do what they rehearsed (at some point we never saw) or else this is gonna end horribly wrong

"help"

same Carlos, same

I love how seb is just his translator rn

I thought he said "great displeasure" instead of "greatest pleasure"....help?

big red coming out from throwing up to see his girlfriend star is the cutest thing in this show.

Ash and Gina dancing is so fun

I'm imagining them practicing at night at their home, watching the movie for the 100th time and making sure their one dance together is perfect

KOURTNEY YES

HOWIE IS IN LOVE AHHHH

I LOVE HOWIE SO MUCH

SEBBY

THIS SCENE HAS SO MUCH GOING ON I CAN'T KEEP UP

THIS IS SO GOOD

HOW???

no because I'm actually crying

I'm dead serious.

we need this musical released as a special

big red is so proud and I love to see it

Natalie: "if you do not by at least 20 dollars in concessions, you do not support art"

rando in the audience: "but I pay for ad free Spotify"

Mr Mazzara clapping in the distance

Gigi, the guy you like is talking to you, complimenting you and hyping you up

YOU LUCKY LITTLE FEATHER DUSTER

aw EJ teasing her about the chocolates in a way that doesn't make her feel bad? take notes Richard

JORDAN FISHER

there is no rest of the show idc Jordan is it for me

THE WIG CAP ON RICKY OMG

they look like they're high and having "deep" conversations on the floor

THE MEAN GIRL WITH THE EYES-

@sunshine-julie-molina YOU HEAR THAT

Natalie really just be coming for them all

Howie what is happening rn

I'm scared

"did you enjoy it"

"very much"

dude wants a kiss so bad

ASHLYN OMG

NO DON'T DO IT BECAUSE OF LILY, PUT YOUR OWN TWIST ON IT

I want a Jordan autograph please

just keep swim- oh pushing...

Gina is literally a giant next to him and I live for it

am I about to cry for the 3rd time in this episode?

yes.

Ricky's leg kicks under the table makes me so happy aw

the portwell glances will kill me.

ah yes, mashed potato snow

Mr. M.... I'm not a theatre kid but even I know you can't have your phone on backstage.

Howie please just do it

CHIP'S BIG LINE I CANT

I LITERALLY HAD TO PAUSE IT AMD SCREAM INTO MY MASK FOR A SOLID 2 MINUTES (I'm not at home rn) HES SO CUTE

oh ok bye Jordan

oo tea

NOT HIM BEING STARSTRUCK BECAUSE HE'S MEETING HIS FUTURE BROTHER IN LAW-

"we're all just glad Gigi has a big brother figure in her life"

excuse me for a few thousand hours while I laugh hysterically

THE CAMERA ZOOM ON EJS FACE AND EVERYTHING-

STOP EJ LOOKS LIKE HE'S GONNA CRY BUT I CAN'T TAKE HIM SERIOUSLY WITH THE STAGE MAKE-UP

someone else said this already but I think it's hilarious that they had to bring in 2 guest characters to create some portwell angst

omg this really is Cici's episode, found family is their thing

elevator music lol

I'm gonna bet that big red took the harness for his surprise for Ashlyn without realising what it was

did Ms. Jenn just....tell her most mentally unstable student....to commit suicide....on a disney show...was that....I'm very....well....what the actual-

oh and there she goes running off instead of trying to make it right

oh wow Nini's the hero, she's gonna save the show 🤩

😐

the judge is doing a sudoku

honestly if I went to the hsm show as well, I'd come prepared for this one too

Lily why are you looking like that-

I WAS JUST STARTING TO LIKE YOU DON'T MESS THIS UP

wow ok, there goes that.

omg

what if Howie was acting weird because he knew what Lily did and wanted to tell Kourtbut Lily threatened him so he was scared to-

anyways see y'all clowns next week when we all simultaneously lose all motivation for the week without Fridays to look forward to.

#hsmtmts #hsmtmts s2 #hsmtmts season 2 #hsmtmts spoilers #ej caswell #gina porter #ricky bowen #nini salazar roberts #seb mathew smith #carlos rodriguez #big red #ashlyn caswell #kourtney greene #howie my pizza king #lily hsmtmts

[sarenhale]

I'm really sorry if this is a weird question, but I was curious if there are any specific ways you keep up such a consistent quality AND quantity of art? You're one of the most prolific and skilled artists I follow and I often find myself thinking "how do they do it?!" I love to draw, but I feel so slow and like I can only post once or twice a month. Has there been anything that helps you stay focused and regular with you art? Thanks in advance, and thanks for being an amazing, inspirational artist ^-^b

This is not a weird question at all, it's actually very interesting! And thank you so much for the kind words... wow... I'm so flattered and happy you would think of me as such an artist T__T These are some really POWERFUL and inspirational words, thank you!! I feel a bit shocked to hear this, but also really happy to know I can inspire someone with my drawings T_T You are the one inspiring me now, my friend

As for the question, I think probably the thing that allows me the most to have the time and inspiration to draw consistently is the fact that I work from home as a freelance artist, and since that's my job, it has become a daily routine for me to draw on commissions/freelance work, and also cut some time for myself and my personal art. Being allowed to stay at home and focus on art as my job is definitely the biggest factor on my productivity, like for example when I was working retail full time a year ago that definitely wasn't the case, I always felt so tired (mentally and physically) that I couldn't barely produce anything in my (nonexistent) free time, because I was so tired I just used that free time to sleep and recover... LOL

Aside from this being the biggest factor in my answer, I think having a good chunk of daily inspiration really helps me gather new ideas and even the excitement to create more daily! Things like playing new games (playing FFXIV and fe3h sparked my creativity immensely in the past year), scrolling through twitter and tumblr and seeing art by the artists I follow, and thinking 'oh man I love how they did this shading or lineart', that really makes me wanna pick up my pen tablet and start drawing, and maybe try something new.

I think having some side hobbies can also really help me get some detached time from drawing, relax and 'clear' my mind, so when I get back at drawing I feel more rested and inspired by the thing I made in my other hobby. Like for example I play a lot of pen on paper rpgs like D&D, cyberpunk and vampire the masquerade, and I also DM a D&D game for my friend group: focusing on writing/planning the encounters and the story really helps meto focus on something that isn't drawing for a change, and also gather material and fuel for more inspirations for later! (Like drawing what transpired during our roles, the npcs my players met, what they did... etc)

Drawing daily is definitely something that required a lot of getting accustomed to during the years, but I found that it comes quite naturally for me. I get a bit antsy when I don't draw actually. It also feels weirdly rewarding to me, I have a serious deficit of attention on basically everything, but drawing puts me 'in the zone' and actually makes me hyperfocused, so it feels kinda 'good' to me to be in The Zone as often as I can.

I would say definitely don't feel bad if you don't produce enough or feel like you aren't drawing 'as much as you should', different people have different routines and way of creating. Our minds are all different and work in different ways! I'd suggest try to find what works best for you, maybe introducing some more inspiration in your life is what you need, or just trying new things, like trying new methods of painting/coloring/doing art. Try playing new games, reading new books or doing some writing, or something that you like doing as a hobby: I find that connecting my art to other hobbies is what really keeps my inspiration and motivation going.

I would also say that's it's important that you get some rest and chill when you feel like you're hitting a wall. Sometimes the answer to hitting a wall and feeling stuck isn't to headbutt the wall, but just allowing yourself some rest and time for yourself. Social media may make it look like people are always amazing and producing a lot, but to be honest, there are some periods of time when I'm also feeling super burnt over drawing, and just dedicate a week or something to playing games, sleeping, and doing something else. I wouldn't even pick up the pen.

Maybe it's because my mental health (and problems) go hand in hand with my inspiration and productivity, but I also try to approach drawing as something that should make me happy, not stressed or frustrated. If something feels unreachable today, try again tomorrow. Sleep on it. It's amazing the amount of times that the 'sleep on it' technique worked on my drawings, even for professional and commercial work. Be kind to youself and find what works for YOU! Producing something is better than produing nothing. Even if you feel like you're 'only' making a couple of drawing a month, that's amazing that you're making something with your HANDS!! From NOTHING!!

And also, I personally think that posting 2 or 3 times a month is actually pretty productive. We have lives, jobs, responsabilities in our daily lives, and also need some good time to rest, so all things considered, I think you're doing amazing already! !

I hope my answer was a least a bit useful to you! I'm always happy to answer questions like this one, it's super interesting to get to think about my process and talk about it with others. So thank you for the interesting question and also the lovely and powerful words :) It's especially thanks to asks like this one that I'm really happy I am able to interact with people with my art.

#MWAH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! #answered

[adultswim2021]

Ephemera Week (2002)

It’s still ephemera week, and we’re still talking about John K. I said most of my piece on him in the last post, so don’t expect there to go full bore on this one, except I forgot to say he’s animation’s Jerry Lewis. His current stuff is basically Hardly Working. I will not elaborate, because I’m being mean to you0.

MARCH SPECIALS!

In March, Adult Swim advertised a run of one-off specials. A couple of them were already covered because they fell under the parameters of “Adult Swim original production”. They were Welcome to Eltingville (March 3rd) and Saddle Rash (March 24th).

Day in the Life of Ranger Smith | March 10th 2002 - 11:00 PM (Originally aired on Cartoon Network in 1999)

This was one of two specials commissioned by Cartoon Network re-imagining Yogi Bear. The artist what took this assignment was John K, who I REEEAALLY skewered in last night’s post, didn’t I?

This is about Ranger Smith harassing animals and writing them up for violating park rules, basically. It’s short! I remember liking it at the time! Okay, maybe I’m going crazy here, but I distinctly remembered a part at the end where Ranger Smith is in bed and he solemnly confides in the viewer that the noises of wilderness give him nightmares and then it just ends. Did I imagine this? It does end with him in bed, but this doesn’t happen in the version on YouTube (which is from the Adult Swim airing). Huh.

Boo Boo Runs Wild | March 10th 2002 - 11:15PM (Originally aired on Cartoon Network in 1999)

Boo Boo Runs Wild was another one of these stand-alone Yogi Bear John K specials. This one was 30 minutes long. The Ranger Smith short was a brief 7 minutes; I’m guessing they aired a couple Capt. Lingers or something to fill time.

This one is about Boo Boo reverting to his feral nature and causing BIIIIG problems! This special would later go on to be kind of a weird trolling thing Adult Swim would do where they aired it every Sunday for a few months, even promoting regularly. This was like 2006, I think? They’d also air it as part of April Fools. Is that Adult Swim admitting this special sorta sucks? Does it sorta suck? Again, I liked these at the time and REFUSED to actively rewatch these for this write-up. Sorry.

The Jetsons: Father and Son Day/The Best Son | March 10th, 2002 11:45PM (Originally aired on CartoonNetwork.com in 2001) Our John K rock block ends with a pair of Jetsons shorts, Father and Son Day and The Best Son respectively. This is kinda the same deal as his Yogi Bear shorts, but these were exclusive for Cartoon Network’s website. I remember watching them on there. They are as bad as you’d expect late-period John K internet shorts to be, though the second short is a superior version of Spielberg’s A.I. (in that it’s shorter).

Night of the Living Doo | March 17th, 2002 - 11:00PM (originally aired on Cartoon Network, 2001)

Night of the Living Doo originally aired as wraparound segments during a Halloween Scooby Doo marathon on Cartoon Network. It’s kinda like an episode of the Scooby Doo Movies, which shoehorned in a guest star each episode. Suddenly my man Dick Van Dyke be running a carnival and shit. That’s the Scooby Doo Movies. At the end of the night they played all the wraparound segments in one uninterrupted sitting, so the viewer could appreciate it as an actual full-on Scooby Doo episode. Night of the Living Doo functioned both as an extension of that series as well as a parody. The guests were Gary Coleman, David Cross, and the very cool band Big Bad Voodoo Daddy. It was all very self-deprecating and had jokes about the absurdity of Scooby Doo tropes. Well trod territory by this point, sure. But this is better than most irreverent Scooby Doo things. It didn’t hurt that I was a HUGE David Cross fan when this aired. Is this where I tell the stupid-ass story about getting mad at a message board guy for not liking David Cross? Sure. Okay, yeah. When this aired on Adult Swim a guy on Kon’s (hi Kon) message board posted something about not finding David Cross funny, shrugging that he didn’t get the hype. He cited this and his appearances in the Men in Black movies, and nothing else as proof for his lackluster comedy skills. It’s kinda like deeming Eddie Murphy as a bad comedian after watching Dr. Doolittle.

The point of this special is that David Cross is a little wooden and stilted, like in the old Scooby Doo Movies episodes. This poster revealed that he never heard David Cross’s stand-up or seen Mr. Show, explaining “I don’t watch puppet shows” A response that still baffles me to this day. Why Mr. Show isn’t a-- WHAT IS HE TALKING ABOUT? I’m not even sure if there was EVER a puppet on Mr. Show*. David wasn’t even a guest on Crank Yankers at this point! SO WHAT THE FUCK? To this day whenever mutual pals from that board get together and watch a movie or show and a puppet appears we make a joke about this guy. Good story? No? Fuck you.

Other stuff about this show: When it originally aired on Cartoon Network it was a little bit longer than the Adult Swim version. There’s a missing scene. I think it’s David trying to play an improv game with a mummy or something. At one point I had it on tape, but I’m not sure I kept it. Sorry.

*sorry to be coy here, but I do know of at least one puppet on Mr. Show, episode 204 there is brief footage of Grass Valley Greg putting on a puppet show for his staff. This CAN’T be the source of the confusion, can it? It’s literally like, 5 seconds.

MAIL BAG

This’ll teach me to skip a day cuz this really piled up. Thanks, guys. I love all the attention. It is my favorite thing.

I never really saw oblongs as something for the hot topic set. They had Invader Zim and Squee for that kind of shit. Oblongs feel like it was always directly targeting me: the shut-in comedy nerd who would appreciate will ferrell and the sklars being in a thing. Since they ended up doing the exact same show with Janeane Garofalo and David Cross a few years later it seems like that was the goal.

Yeah, I guess that also makes sense. There were a few elements that were kinda gothy but this show was mostly just Angus Oblong ahem, clowning around (puckering mouth to stifle laughter like Chris Elliott in Cabin Boy)

What are your thoughts on the other adult animation blocks of the past couple decades? Spike's notriously failed attempt. Animation Domination. Apparently Syfy has had their own going?

Spike was irredeemably bad. People think this shit is easy. Animation Domination is sorta legit, but it’s anchored by mostly crap. That ADHD thing was kinda good and underrated. Is that still going on? I wish I were more diligent about watching/recording that. Some of them bumpers were good. Also, we mustn’t forget MTV’s oddities. They were kinda the first cable network to court Adult Animation as their thing. They deserve some kind of credit for that. I’m sure they’re doing fine.

I'm having a nice big thing of spaghetti for dinner with some chicken parm? Jealous?

I’ve never had those are they good

What does Ephemera mean? Why is this happenening? Why aren't you talking about 10 Home Movies episodes in a row like a good boy.

In dude time, my friend. In dude time

What would be your Adult Swim dream come true?

Having a complete archive of Adult Swim blocks on a harddrive like Don Giller has with his Letterman archive. Even the commercials and shit. I know of a guy who was a regular taper of the entire block from night 1 but I’m not sure he kept up with it when they went nightly. I should ask him if he still has his tapes, huh?

That or they bring back the BUILD YOUR OWN DVD thing but with blu-rays and you can make your own bumps, which was a different thing they had. THEY SHOULD COMBINE THEM. And you can master it in SD if you wanna put 10 hours of stuff on a disk.

All this is archival bullshit dork shit. Real answer: Clay Croker comes back from the dead and every block is hosted by Space Ghost. That’d be it, right?

If anyone has genuine/better answers please write in with them I wanna keep this conversation going. ‘kay?

McDonalds reintroduces limited edition Adult Swim Toys. You can get them all (plus an extra to keep wrapped for collectors purposes) but you have to spend 20 dollars at McDonalds to grab them all. This is the last day of the promotion. You have to personally eat everything you buy but you can take it home. You can only buy one of each food item. What are you getting? I know the longer the mailbag message is the quicker you are inclined to give some glib remark but indulge this one for once.

Oh wow. I’m literally going to take this seriously. I’d roll in as breakfast was ending. Get myself a McChicken Biscuit and a Bacon Egg & Cheese McGriddle, hashbrowns and a Coffee. Gobble that knob on down. Wipe my mouth with a napkin. It’s lunchtime, bitch. Big Mac, Large Fries, BIG ass soda. You feel me, dude? Lemme tally up. Okay, probably need more. 20 piece nugget. Take that home cuz I’m probably gonna have to save some for dinner. That’s probably 20 bucks right there, especially if you go to the McDonalds on Burnside where all the menu items are more expensive because of the amount of security they have to hire (did you know that different McDonalds have different prices even in the same city? I didn’t until very recently). If this somehow doesn’t satisfy my price point I get a Vanilla shake and eat it anally DURING my BIG D squirt sesh, so it’ll spend as little time in my body as possible. Wait, do I get something for this? I might do this tomorrow just cuz. It sounds like a funky thing to do

Do you think you'll open an Adult Swim mueseum at some point? You seem to be the only steward of its history.

Unless I’m hired to by a large corporation, probably not. Also I don’t think I actually have much in the way of merch other than DVDs. I stopped being a DVD completist at some point around Freaknick The Musical. Oh, I never EVER bought a Robot Chicken DVD, EVER. I literally had a nightmare once that one appeared in my collection.

Hey! Please keep us abreast any time you put more of your garbage on eBay. Maybe you can put your wedding dress on there, you big girl.

Fucking sexist/trasphobic behavior.

Check out my eBay auctions I got season 18 of NCIS up there and some other things :)

The Ripping Friends blow chunks. I don't care if a rapist or the opposite of a rapist (a virgin who volunteers, lol) made it. It sucks a high hard one like when Ozzy banged the Cheiftan's Wife in that Black Sabbath TV Funhouse cartoon. Tell me more.

Tell you more?

Name one rap song you tolerate lol. You can't say anything by weird al or marky mark.

I guess I like the song the pest sings from the motion picture The Pest

Are there any good podcasts on adult swim?

The official one hosted by Matt Harrigan is good, but I’ve only bounced around on it. I don’t know if there’s any formal recap ones. I simply don’t know!

HE'S GIVING HIGH HARD ONE TO CHEIFTAN'S WIFE? UH OH!

Buddy, you are BANNED for LIFE from my MAIL BAG! You drive me CRAZY!

#adult swim #adultswim2021 #night of the living doo #boo boo runs wild #yogi bear #jetsons #ephemera

[dearmrsawyer]

well IT WAS A YEAR. it was also emotionally two weeks and five years? lol. its been a lot, but there were some real positives from this year that i wanna reflect on just because! they’re nice to think about!!

i’d love to know if any of you have any positive things from your year that you’d like to reflect on. accepting asks where we can celebrate your little wins too :)

in general i’m just quite proud of myself for how i’ve managed the library this year, given that its just me. its been hard feeling more disconnected from our students, and also trying to provide them with support that can reach across the void created by distance learning. it wasn’t 100% successful all the time! but it can’t be, and i never aimed for that. i just did everything that i felt i could reasonably do as a single individual, and i think i did my best! i spent a lot of this year driving out to post books to our students, or meeting them at convenient locations to do book swaps, and i’ve spent a lot of time coaching academics through online systems over zoom so that they could effectively teach their subjects, and i’ve spent a lot of nights and weekends prepping materials that needed to be made available to students ahead of class, because our academic staff weren’t able to finish them while i was still on the clock (i’m def not trying to @ our academics here! they’ve been delivering material late all year bc of how much extra work they’ve had to take on too! its just the roll on effect bc i’m the last link in the chain). i’ve felt a huge sense of camaraderie with many of my colleagues this year, and am grateful i had them to make this work year more manageable. but i know i’ve been doing a lot of hidden work and i think i did well :)

oh man i loved turning off my wake up alarm in march and never turning it on again!!!! I think i can count the number of times i’ve had to use my alarm on one hand, and they were mostly dr appointments. it feels so comfortable to wake up when my body decides, whether its 6am or after i should already be working LOL. there have definitely been ebbs and flows to how well i’ve slept throughout the year, sometimes i know exactly what’s affecting my sleep and sometimes i have no idea, but regardless, the absence of an impending alarm has been such a nice way to compensate for.. everything else lol

i started growing vegetables!!!!!! I spent a week in March digging out a patch of my yard, and then the next month or two growing seedlings, and i successfully grew snow peas, silverbeet, beetroot and lettuce :D i also added dill to my herb garden, and successfully propagated thyme and lemongrass! i did attempt a few other vegetables that didn’t pan out, mostly because snails kept eating my seedlings jkjdgkj but it was so exciting to successfully grow something that i could then EAT! and i’ve also been able to figure out which vegetables i consider more convenient to grow, for example buying leafy greens can be super inconvenient bc i find its often impossible to use them all before they go bad. they sell greens in such ridiculously large bunches! but growing them myself, i can go out and pick however many leaves i want, and the rest won’t go bad because they’re still on the plant! i also started to stagger how many seeds i wanted to grow which meant they weren’t all maturing at the same time, and i didn’t need to use them all at the same time. 

Supernatural finished this year which was NOT a highlight 😭 but it was originally scheduled to finish in May, and i was given the gift of 6 whole extra months to live with this show as a work in progress. as much as i still wasn’t ready to say goodbye in November (would i have ever been ready), i was given so much unexpected extra time to appreciate being IN it while it was still going. i spent so much of this year reflecting on how big a part of my life this show has been, and how much its given me and shaped me. from the ages of 14 to 29 i was able to live with this show as a close friend, and i’ve never taken that for granted, but i am so thankful for the extra time i was given to reflect and appreciate it even more deeply. also supplementary highlight is how much that ending meant to me <3 the world can think whatever it wants but i was on that journey for 15 years, i was there for every episode, never falling behind or taking a break, and that ending honoured the story i watched, and i am very grateful that the pain of it ending was cushioned by the sense of peace and fulfilment that ending gave me. 

i finally found hair products that WORK!!!!! i’ve had the same hair routine for like a decade (basically sans products) and i thought i should use this extended period of time where i exist unobserved to experiment. i’ve never really bought hair products for myself, i’ve always inherited them from my mum bc she always had a surplus of products she’s collected over the years. our hair couldn’t be more different so i’ve never experienced a product that was particularly effective LOL. i have v dry hair that’s naturally curly/wavy but extremely frizzy, and i have soo much of it!! so many hairs on my head! my mission was to find a way to let it dry naturally without all that frizz popping up, and without having to dry it in two big twists. the only products directed at curly hair that i’ve ever been aware of is mousse, which used to give people that crunchy look that i can’t staaaaaand but i’ve spent a few months buying quite a lot of products and testing them out one after another, and i’ve found a couple that i absolutely LOVE!! this is big for me bc i always structured my week around when i wash my hair (the day of and day after i’m unavailable lol). i’ll still have to structure my time around it somewhat bc it takes so so long to dry, but its going to be less of a drama if i have to do things when its not completely dry yet, and also i just feel like i’m finally getting to let my hair do its own thing without it stabbing me in the back 😂

i think that human connection has probably been more important this year than ever before, and i’ve often felt like maintaining connections requires energy i just haven’t had for a lot of this year. but i also feel like i have been very connected? i feel like i put in the work. my best friend and i shared a few phone calls this year even though neither of us have ever really been big on phone calls (neither of us have ever talked with people on the phone much in our lives lol). i’ve skyped with my Norwegian friend Ellen almost every month this year!! my friend Bel and i started exchanging sporadic voice messages again, which i’ve just loved. i’ve video chatted with Steph even though it was a scary new venture! and it was so amazing! i do feel like i’ve had less interaction with people on my dash this year, but i feel like working from home has changed the ebbs and flows of my energy throughout the day sooo much, and i just haven’t been online as much when other people are, but i’ve spent a lot of time connecting with people over whatsapp! when it comes to family, being around my grandparents was really really stressful for the first half of the year, but as the situation in Australia eased we relaxed enough that we were comfortable to spend time with them without our masks (plus we weren’t seeing anyone else lol). and i was able to make myself available to them more often while working from home, since i live only a minute away! we stopped having our big family lunches until September, and when we were finally able to get back together we enjoyed each other’s company so much. so while i haven’t been face to face with people on a daily basis, i don’t think i’m any less connected to the people that matter than i was a year ago.

#not thinking about next year yet! i'll probably do that in a few weeks towards the end of my holiday #tp

[lu-undy]

Chapter 98 - SBT

Here it is!

"G'bye, Prof L!" 

"Goodbye, and remember to revise these crucial points, oui? This is fundamental geometry." 

"Yes, Sir!" 

"Fine, enjoy your weekend." Lucien smiled at his pupils. 

"See ya!" 

The kids excitedly left the room and the professor turned to wipe his blackboard clean and wash it. He sighed and looked down at his own clothes, dusting the chalk off of his suit. Lucien made sure that the room was in order before sitting down at his desk and correcting the papers of the week. He knew Mundy would be at the workshop still working and going back home alone didn’t feel right. So Lucien readied his red pen and took the first paper of the pile at the corner of his desk.

He was used to this routine. It allowed his lover to finish his day of work as well as not burden himself with too much over the weekend. 

After slashes of red, crossing mistakes, underlining approximations and appreciating his pupils’ work, the Frenchman needed a cigarette. He raised his head off of his papers and lit one up. His eyes swept across the room, the wooden desks, the back breaking chairs… He smiled. Teaching was something he never expected to like. And yet, making a positive difference on those children not only earned him his bread, but filled his soul. 

Children have always been an unbreakable force of nature. But dear is the price to make them thrive. They are a boiling concentrate of energy, of potential, and of hope. Lucien remembered his younger days as a rookie spy. He saw barbarism, butchery of men beyond what should exist. He saw men die on battlefields and away from them. Sometimes he himself was the one responsible for their deaths. And yet, after the deed was done, he would walk out scott free and in the streets, children would continue to play, oblivious to the danger surrounding them. 

But were they really oblivious? Non, they knew that war was raging, but even the massacre of their fathers, brothers and uncles didn’t break them. It made them, like Jérémy, kinder. Those children were growing and would no doubt refuse to subject their own children to the same amount of atrocities, to the same hard childhood. Theirs had been hard enough, too hard, unfairly so. 

Maybe that was what Lucien’s mother meant when she called him her reason to live. After his father’s death was confirmed, her mourning had lasted forever, but she rarely showed it to young Lucien. She always smiled to him, and turned away to cry. She always showed him the best of her. That, to him, was a proof of courage and strength beyond what he had seen among war heroes. His mother would remain, to the end, his model for endurance. 

“Grand Dieu, pourquoi je pense à ça…?”

[Good God, why am I thinking about this…?]

He went to the window and drew the curtains open. 

“Oh…”

His daydreaming and reminiscing had put the sun below the horizon. The streets were dark and the few people still there were moving out of the city centre. Lucien turned to the clock on the wall, above the blackboard and his eyebrows jumped. It was proper late and Mundy hadn’t come back to him yet.

“Hm.”

Lucien collected the remaining papers and put them in his leather bag before exiting the classroom. He walked to the workshop and looked through the window. A light was still on on one of the desks and a hunched silhouette so familiar to Lucien was looking down at the desk.

“Yeah, Maurice, I’ll go…”

“It is not Maurice.”

“Oh…?”

Mundy turned on his stool and his eyebrows jumped when he saw Lucien.

“What are you doin’ here?”

“I could ask you the same.” Lucien came behind his lover’s back and laced his arms around his neck. He kissed his cheek from behind. “I was waiting for you but you never came.”

“What time is it..?” Mundy looked at his watch. “Oh, bugger, I’m sorry, I didn’t see the time fly…”

“I am not surprised about this as much as I am surprised that Maurice did not kick you out of here yet.”

“He tried, but I uh… I got carried away, sorry, luv'..." Mundy lowered his head and ruffled his hair before he rubbed his eyes. 

Lucien scanned the workbench and saw the pile of broken toys and small electricals. A toaster, a radio, an alarm clock…

"You have had a productive day, hm?" 

"Well…" Mundy sighed. "Nah, not really." 

"What is the matter, mon amour?" Lucien hugged his lover from behind and stuck his cheek to the Aussie. Mundy leaned to him and closed his eyes. 

"Still thinkin' about it all. Can't really take my mind off of things."

Lucien pulled a stool and sat down next to his lover. The workshop was silent apart from the buzzing of some heater. The only light was shed by the lamp on the workbench. 

"Tell me." Lucien took Mundy's hands between his own. 

"It's my dad… I don't wanna sound dramatic but…" Mundy raised his eyes to Lucien. "How can I be sure he… I mean… He likes me still. Maybe he's never really seen me as his son, I mean…"

"Tsk, tsk, tsk…" Lucien shook his head. "Your father is a lot of things, Mundy, one of them is your father. He does love you, he just doesn't know how to contain it or show it."

"But if he really loves me, wouldn't he be happy for me?"

Lucien sighed. 

"One would expect so, oui. But again, remember that you being with a man is far outside what he imagined you were. Give him some time." 

"If your son was with a bloke, would you yell at him like that?" Mundy asked with a serious tone of voice. 

"Of course I would not, because I myself understand the attraction towards men." Lucien answered. "But your father doesn't. It was never in his mind, he never thought it could even exist. It is a lot to take in, give him the benefit of the doubt, and trust your mother."

"Mum?" 

"She said she will talk to him. Women have a way with us that is beyond our reach…" Lucien smiled sweetly. 

"No." 

Lucien's eyebrows jumped.

"Pardon?" He asked in his mother tongue. 

"Mum's never stood up to Dad, ever. She just said that to make me feel better." 

"Mundy, a lot has happened for the past few months. I am sure your mother will talk to your father."

"Nah, you saw her. She didn't say much when we were there."

"Yet what she did say had an impact on your father." 

"What?" Mundy raised a curious eyebrow. 

"She reminded him that by faking my own death to protect you, I wasn't so different from him. In fact, I did exactly the same thing as he did. His eyebrows twitched and his breath cut for an instant. He certainly did not like the comparison but what could he argue? It was the plain truth." Lucien explained. 

"Still. Not convinced Mum would change his mind."

"Stubborn as he is, she certainly will not. However," Lucien tilted his lover's chin up with a gentle index finger. "She will plant the seed of doubt." 

Mundy looked away. 

"Yeah, well… Can't help thinkin' that he doesn't really love me." 

"Why?" 

"If… If you got a son, and you got plans for him but he keeps on not goin' according to them, wouldn't you lose hope at some point and just say 'oh, right, fuck it…'?"

"Non. I did not conceive a human being, the most fragile of creatures, to not carry the responsibility of them all my life until I am six feet under ground." Lucien answered in one go. 

"But he didn't!" Mundy raised his arms before they flopped to his thighs again. "He didn't conceive me! He found me and… and he took pity on me…" He admitted, muttering in his breath. 

Lucien put his hands on Mundy's shoulders. 

"He did take you in, didn't he?" 

"Mh." 

"Did he, yes or no?" Lucien repeated, staring at Mundy in the eye. 

"Yeah…"

"Did he raise you?"

"Yeah…"

"Did he ask you to stop hunting because he was scared for you?" 

Mundy raised his eyes to Lucien. 

"Yeah, he did…"

"This is how you know he loves you. His anger, his frustration are also proof, albeit twisted, of him caring about you. If he didn't care, then he wouldn't become half as angry as he is, would he?" 

"Yeah but… You keep on sayin' he wants me to get a sheila and stuff to be happy. So it'd make sense to think that what he wants at the end of the day is for me to be happy, right?" 

"Oui."

"Then why the hell isn't he now?!" Mundy asked. "I'm happy, I've managed, I-I've done everythin' and he can't be happy!" 

Lucien sighed and frowned. 

"I do not know." The ex-spy admitted. "I just want you to keep some hopes up, Mundy. From what I saw of your father, he is a tough man, strict on his ideas and wouldn't change them for the world. But one cannot stop hoping."

"Think I just might. I'm tired of hoping. It's so bloody tirin'..." Mundy rubbed his face with his rough hands. 

Lucien's eyebrows relaxed. 

"Then, stop." 

"Stop what?" 

"Stop hoping." 

"But you just said that I should keep my hopes up?!"

"And you answered that you don't want to, so just stop." 

Mundy stared in Lucien's eyes. It lasted a few seconds before he looked away and sighed. 

"I can't."

"Then, keep some hopes up, but don't let it eat you on the inside. Give your mother some time to work her magic on him. Things are not what they were more than a decade ago. Your mother has lost you once. She knows what it feels to lose you and from how quickly she accepted us, she is ready to make a lot of sacrifices before she loses you again."

"Yeah but if she has to choose, she'll go with him." Mundy said. "And Dad would say that the choice is in my hands. Either stay with you and lose him, or the other way around…" Mundy put his hands on his face.

"I wouldn't be so sure." Lucien answered, kissing his head. "And if it ever boiled down to that, I will be where you want me to be." 

"What's that supposed to mean?" Mundy raised his head to his lover. 

"That means that, as I said all that time ago, more than year ago now, making me happy is something that I cannot do. Making you happy however, is all I ever think about. And so, if you ever felt like you have to make a choice, whatever you choose, I will do what leads to your happiness."

"Lu'... Are you sayin' that you'd… You'd leave me?" 

Their eyes met and hung there. Lucien took a deep breath and cupped Mundy's face in his hands. He leaned forward and they rested their foreheads against each other.

"I will do whatever to make you the happiest of men alive on this Earth, Mundy, do you hear me?" They closed their eyes and silent tears ran along their cheeks. "I know how tired you are to run after your father, after his blessing and I understand it… I… I understand it…" Lucien put a hand on his mouth, his fingers were shaking. "This is ridiculous… I am crying now… I apologise…"

"Lu'...?" Mundy pleaded with a broken voice. "Lu', no…" 

"Non, Mundy… Your family is… It is very important to you and I understand that. You cannot replace your family." Lucien sniffled. 

"Can't replace you either!" Mundy exclaimed. "I can't! Bloody can't!" He put his hands on Lucien's waist and stood up to pull him into an embrace. "I won't leave you, love, I won't…! You left me once and I couldn't live anymore, no, please…"

"Mundy, I just want you to know" Lucien's breath cut. He sniffled and went on, his eyes still closed. "I just want you to know that… Whatever you do, I will support you… It might be hard for the both of us, but I will… I will…"

"Shut up… Shut up, I love you…" Mundy pulled Lucien to him in one go and the pin in his hair sank, freeing his long locks of salt and pepper. Mundy slid his hand under Lucien's hair, behind his head and pulled him close. "No, I won't choose. I'm tired of feelin' like shit as if it's my fault. It's not my fault, it's no one's fault, there isn't any fault… I just love you…"

"I love you too." Lucien clung to his lover's chest, digging his fingers hard, as if Mundy was slipping away from him already. "I… I never thought I could love this way… Thank you…"

The Frenchman's tears wetted the Aussie's polo shirt but neither of them cared. Mundy was almost more saddened by Lucien's tears than by his own predicament. It was rare to see Lucien in tears, especially outside of the intimacy of the sheets. Mundy clung back to his lover, his silk hair and his thin waist.

"I hope Mum'll help, I really do…" 

"Your mother is very close to you, in her heart." Lucien wiped his tears with a handkerchief and then raised it to Mundy's face to wipe him. "She will do any and everything she can to avoid the choice for you and for her. Moreover, she loves you with all that you bring with you." Lucien said and held Mundy's hand again. "The other day, she asked me to teach her how to cook a ratatouille the way that you like it." He smiled.

Mundy raised tired eyes to his lover, yet his lips pursed into a smile too.

"She loves you, Mundy. She took you in, not out of pity, but because in her heart, the moment she saw you, she knew." Lucien poked Mundy's chest.

"She knew what?" 

Lucien raised his hand to Mundy cheek and gently stroked it with his thumb.

 "That she was your mother."

-- Earlier, in the street -- 

"How long've you known?" 

"Very long. Almost as early as it started."

 "Pfff…" 

"But believe me, they didn't fall in each other's arms at first sight, far from it."

"Mmh…" 

The old man grumbled, a bit disgusted, and walked in circles in the dark room. His fists were clenched. 

"Were you goin' to tell me?" 

"No, why would I?" The king of the beggars asked. "It is none of my business, Mike." Maurice paused. "Neither is it yours, strictly speaking." 

Mike froze and turned to the beggar in the long, ragged clothes. 

"Course it is! It's my bloody son!" 

"What do you want from me?" Maurice asked. 

"Is it botherin' only just me?!" 

"It depends. What does Caroline think?" 

"She's fine with it! Goes to visit them, stays for dinner and all! Pfff…" Mike removed his hat and shook his head. "How could we go so wrong with that kid…?"

"Well, then, yes." 

"Yes, what?" 

"Yes, it is bothering only you." Maurice answered. 

"Maurice…!" 

"Fine," The tall man stood up from his throne and faced Mike. "What is it? You are unhappy about their relationship."

"Yeah, that's puttin' it mildly!" He exclaimed, looking up at the taller man.

"And why is that? They are grown, reasonable men, and they both are doing it of their own accord. None is forcing the other." 

"Maurice, it's blokes."

"Yes, exactly! They are grown and old enough to know what suits them best. It just so happens that it is each other!" 

Mike sighed. 

"He told me you know him for service, right?" 

"Who?" 

"That Lucien guy."

"Indeed, I do." 

Mike walked to a chair and sat down, in front of the empty throne. 

"Tell me about him. I wanna know what kind of a man he is." 

"Ah." Maurice took a seat opposite the old man and cleared his throat. "I hope you don't have anything planned for the next hour or so." 

"What?" 

And Maurice recited Lucien's life as best as he knew it. Of course, the ex-spy had left areas of shadow and doubt in his official files, such that Maurice couldn't exactly say where he came from, or his family whereabouts. But the key message was there. Lucien was a selfless war hero who turned his back to the country that he helped to create, because that same country had attempted to backstab him, ironically enough. 

"Yeah, well…" Mike tried to feel indifferent to it all. "Does Micky know all that?" 

"He was there for his fake funeral." Maurice answered. "For which war veterans flew from across the world immediately, without receiving formal notice. All they heard was the whispers in the air flying from mouth to ear and spreading faster than light."

Mike frowned.

"Michael," Maurice started and Mike raised his eyes to him. "What is the problem?" 

The old man put a hand on his tired head and shook it.

"I… I don't know anymore. Caroline tells me all these things about how happy Micky is, how much he smiles and laughs now, how… cute they are together."

"You don't see it yourself? You think she is lying?"

"No, I know she's not lying. I know she's tellin' me the truth, I saw it with my own eyes. Never saw Micky look at someone the way he looks at him."

"But…?" Maurice anticipated. 

"It's wild. A man with another man? Pfff, I wouldn't care if it wasn't my own Micky." 

"When Lucien died, Mundy broke as hard as he did when you supposedly died. I had to push him to work, because his mind was in shambles, I had to push him to continue living even."

"He wanted to…?" Mike asked, frightened of what that last sentence implied. 

"I remember his words when Lucien's death was made official. 'It's happened twice, I don't want to live this shit life anymore.'.... God knows what he would have done if not for one reason."

"What was it?" 

"Lucien had a cat, back then a kitten. He asked me to tell Mundy that he wanted no one else but him to take care of her."

"He… He stayed alive for a cat?"

"No, Michael." Maurice answered. "He stayed alive for Lucien's cat. And that has made all the difference." 

Mike sighed and wiped his face as Maurice patted his shoulder. 

-- Mundy and Lucien's house, a few days later -- 

Lucien looked at Mundy. They were both at the table, having lunch. The Aussie had had trouble sleeping ever since that night at his parents, waking up repeatedly through the night. Holding Lucien or being held by him wasn't enough to bring him comfort. 

Lucien had woken up every time with his lover. He would hold his head against his own chest and kiss him back to sleep. Sometimes, he would get out of bed and go to the kitchen to prepare a tray with a glass of milk and biscuits or something to pass the time with Mundy before both decided to lie down and try to sleep again.

Each time they would get a visit from Caroline, Mundy's face would brighten a bit, every time they did something just for themselves too. But it was always only temporary. Mundy's mood would always gently slide down the dangerous slope that his darker thoughts paved. 

It was high time that the Frenchman tried to take his lover's mind away from his problems, for one night at least. 

"Will you go back working this afternoon?" He asked and Mundy nodded. 

"Yeah. Gotta finish some stuff. You done with your classes?" 

"Oui, I am." 

The concerto of cutlery on plates filled the air. 

"Mundy?" 

"Mh?" 

"When you come back home tonight, put on a suit." 

The Aussie frowned. 

"What? Why?"

"Put on a suit and wait for one of Maurice's boys. They will tell you where to go. You may take the motorcycle to go there."

Mundy raised his head from his plate. 

"Where am I goin'? You won't come with me?"

"Non, I won't."

"Lu', what is it?" Mundy asked, genuinely at a loss as to what to expect.

The Frenchman smirked as he wiped the corners of his mouth elegantly with a napkin.

"It wouldn't be a surprise if I told you." 

-- Later that day --

"What are you doing still here?" Maurice pushed the workshop's door and peeked his head in.

"Workin'."

The king of the beggars fully entered the room and went to put a hand on Mundy's shoulder. 

"You should go, L is waiting." 

"Waitin'? Oh, yeah, I forgot… I need to go back home and wear a suit, he said."

"Yes, and when you are all set, go to the Maravilloso." 

"The Brazilian place?" Mundy's eyebrows jumped. 

"Yes." Maurice answered. 

"Right…" Mundy shifted away from his stool and Maurice tapped on his shoulder. "What?" 

"Have fun." 

"I'll try." 

Mundy had gone back home and quickly took a shower. 

"Meow? Meoow?" 

"Yeah, babies. C'mere… I'll give you your food…" Mundy took the stairs down and went to the cats' bowls. "Hold on… You have food and water? Why're you following me everywhere like that?" He asked, adjusting the towel around his waist. 

"Meow…!" Perle stood up on her back legs and Mundy knelt down. 

"What is it? Oh…" Both cats were begging for pets, hugs and cuddles. The Aussie ended up sitting on the floor and taking care of them for a while. "Hey, babies… What's wrong with you?" 

"Meow…" Perle gently headbutted Mundy's chest while Soot's ears flopped down. 

"What is it? What's the problem, eh?" 

"Meow." Soot answered and raised his paw to lay it flat on Mundy's chest. Perle copied him. 

"Me? Somethin's wrong with me? What did I do?" 

"Meow…" Both meowed long and sad. 

"Yeah, I might've hugged you less over the past week or so, I'm sorry. C'mere both of ya…" He hugged them both, Perle in one arm and Soot in the other. He lowered his head and headbutted them softly while hearing them pur. "I'm so sorry, babies…"

He whispered his apologies in kisses, cuddles and scratches until Perle broke the embrace and trotted away. 

"Meow?" Soot asked.

"Meow…" She swang her fluffy white tail and the male followed up the stairs. 

"Right, now… Off to put on a suit." He climbed the stairs after the slithering black and white clouds and headed straight for his room. After opening the cupboard and looking around, he found that beige suit that Lucien had ordered and got delivered to him more than a year ago now. Mundy smiled in nostalgia and took it out of its hanger. 

The Aussie started with the white shirt and beige trousers, as he remembered the last time he had worn that attire. It was to go and see Lulu, back when Lulu wasn't L yet. Ah, those days… Who would have thought that down a year from then, L and M would be together, inseparable and as close as they were in the alphabet…

Then came the bowtie and vest, before he threw the jacket on his shoulders. 

"Meow!" 

"What?" Mundy looked on his bed. Perle was sitting, observing him, while Soot was lying down. 

"Meow." 

"Love you too, baby, but Dad's gotta go. Papa'll be home hopefully, or somethin'... I don't really know what's happenin', Papa needs me to be somewhere." 

When the words exited his mouth and he heard himself, Mundy froze. 

I don't really know what's happenin', Papa needs me to be somewhere.

Now take that sentence, swap Papa for L and that was time travel, right there. That was exactly how their relationship had started, even if it was just professional. L was pulling the reins and sending the Aussie left and right where he needed him to be. And Mundy had always followed whatever Professor Ski told him to, blindly. He smiled out of nostalgia. 

"Right, I'm all set. Babies, you behave and don't go to bed too late, yeah?" 

"Meow!" Perle shouted.

"Oi! Why're you yellin'?" 

"Meow…!" She stood on her back legs and planted her claws on his legs, to climb him. 

"Claws, claws! Ouch! Let me come down to you…! There, what is it?" 

Perle started to bathe Mundy's face. 

"Yeah, I showered and shaved, no need to clean me more, baby… Oh?" 

"Meow…" She was now doing his hair. Mlem, mlem, mlem…

"Want me to comb it better?" 

"Meow." She said and sat down, backing off of Mundy's head. 

"Alright, I'll go back to the bathroom, then…" 

A minute later, Mundy came back to the front door and put his shoes on. He heard the trotting of soft paws on the floor. 

"Better now?" 

"Meow." Perle confirmed. 

"Thanks, baby, c'mere." He cupped her head and kissed her brow. When he heard the sound of the kiss, the black cat slithered from the living room to his Dad. 

"Meow?" He asked. 

"Course you can get a kiss, c'mere." Mundy opened his hands and Soot came closer. He brushed himself on his master while Mundy kissed him. "There we are, now, can I go? Papa's waitin'." 

"Meow." Both cats sat and looked up at their Dad who unlocked the door. 

"You be good babies, yeah?" 

"Meow." They both answered. 

"Right, see ya later." 

The Aussie shut the door and went to the motorcycle.

"Well, guess I'm off to the Brazilian steakhouse then…" 

He put on his helmet and the engine purred.

#tf2 sniper #tf2 spy #sniperspy #SBT

[deltastorm101]

So, I tried to calculate Control...

... and its Epic Games deal, with the help of my certified smooth brain™ and probably incorrect sources. I started this last night hella tired and with a headache, I have finished it up today hella tired and with a headache, and this is what I produced: bullshit! :D But hey, at least double checked bullshit that’s open for discussion and contribution and expansion. Also, I probably won’t list the sources because a) I’m lazy and b) I didn’t have to dig thaaat deep down to find all this so if you really wanna know you could probably hit google with it as well. Anyhow here we go lol So, the initial thought which got all of this rolling was the 2020-wrap-up-post Remedy linked on their twitter, and Epic’s linked publishing announcement in it: studios Remedy, Playdead and GenDesign will release their next next-gen games with Epic. Now, we all know Remedy are working on some sort of Alan Wake-ish thing as we speak (right? right?? god I hope so), which meanssss our boy will most likely be an Epic exclusive. Which makes me kinda sad because, well. I’m deep in Steam’s ass. Hell, I waited for Control for a full year before I played it because they can pry the Steam version from my cold dead hands. So I asked myself... was it worth it for them? How much money did they throw at Remedy (and 505 Games) to have them play along? Would they have reached more people from the get-go if they had released it on Steam right away? Did the individual programmer, designer, writer, artist, person behind it profit from this at all? (Also, like, about the rights and copyright thing,,,,, you’d think they could have learned from Alan Wake and its IP belonging to Microsoft and so not really being able to do anything more with it because they don’t ‘own’ it and shit) buuut anyway that’s not the point of this post, now it’s time to do some MATH BABEY

Ok, let’s start with some things we know. Facts. Figures. Data. Turns out my initial question, how much money was involved, could be answered by doing one (1) google search: according to Wikipedia, Epic gave Remedy and 505 Games €9.49mio. The total budget for the game was €26.9mio over the course of 3 years of development. We know that as of December 2020, over 2mio copies of the game were sold, with November 2020 being the best-selling month ever since its initial release in August 2019. This is where question 1) comes into play: how many of those 2 million copies were sold in 2019 and how many in 2020? Stay tuned, I think I found out.

We know that Remedy gets to keep 45% of the revenue, which, I assumed, means that 505 keeps the remaining 55% (probably a lot more going on there but shhh). We know that Control’s sales cooked up €17.84mio in 2019 (so months September – December), €17.7mio of those in the first month alone (O.O). Side note: because it came out at the very end of August, I’ll ignore that month and declare September the first sales month.

We know that 60% of sales in 2019 were digital ones (aka Epic Store, mostly), 40% physical ones (consoles PS4 and XB1), while in 2020, only 10% of sales were physical and a whopping 90% digital; which is people on Epic who wanted to get their hands on the first DLC and – you guessed it – the Steam release of the Ultimate Edition in August 2020.

Which begs question 2): what’s bigger, 60% of 2019 sales because ‘ooh shiny new game’, or 90% of 2020 sales because ‘yay steam release’? The answer may look obvious, but you have to take into account the dropping price, which I also researched for your pleasure and enjoyment.

For this I used a German website called idealo.de, which focuses on looking for the best deals for basically anything you can buy on the internet, and it also gives you diagrams that describe at which point in time the product was at which exact price. This is what it gave me: - release price: €60 - December 2019: €41 (PS4)/€44 (XB1) - mid-2020: €30 - Ultimate Edition release: €30 - December 2020: €14 (PS4)/€18 (XB1)/€30 (Ultimate Editions) At this point I was like “lol hold on i need chocolate for this cuz i’ll be here for some time *sweating*”

To continue this mess™, I see more questions: 3) How many employees does Remedy have, which positions do they work in and what are their salaries? 4) How many employees does 505 have, which positions and salaries do they have? 5) What’s the total revenue that Control has generated so far?

And also some more stuff like, are my numbers accurate, am I even grasping these concepts correctly, are there even more people involved or am I just trying to explain complete crap (yes) but let’s just ignore all of that shall we. At that point I went “oh shit what have i gotten myself into, this screen does not get my point across, i need pen and paper” and you know shit is gonna go DOWN when I do math on paper.

My paper math birthed the following calculation:

Following this up, we can calculate the end-of-2019 sales, if we set the price for September and October to €60, for November and December to approx. €45:

Now, you might notice that one of those numbers is big and the other is HUGE. Why might that be? Well...

- Covid19: everyone stayed at home and needed video games to play - More sale months of the year, naturally - dropping price: why get it for €60 when you can get it for 20 - Ultimate Edition: why buy it in June when you get more content in August aaaand... - it comes out on Steam.

With this in mind, let’s see what questions we can answer: 1) 661,110 copies in 2019; 1,338,889 copies in 2020 2) 60% digital sales in 2019 means 396,666 Epic copies; 90% digital sales in 2020 means 1,205,000 copies – most of it from Steam? Some of it? A good chunk? The bigger chunk? There’s no way of really knowing for sure but... you could read this into it. I definitely am. 3) Google told me Remedy had a little over 250 employees at the end of 2019... 4) ... and 505 has less than 100. I found no good sources for this, I think linkedin said 37, someone else said 50. I’ll just use the 50 figure, idk. No idea man. and for 5) I’ll contradict my point that the Steam release is what knocked the sales out of the park and assume that the number of sold copies stayed the same across all 12 months of 2020, which gives us this:

Ok and now we’re getting into the most dangerous of danger zones because I have no idea how companies or capitalism work, so for educated people™, the remaining calculations might read like a toddler wrote them; I apologize profusely and hereby present last night’s brain vomit:

As stated earlier, development took 3 years, but everyone wanted to get paid in 2020 as well so let’s use 4 years to find out the salaries, which is 48 months. Let’s assume the utopian idea that every employee on the line here gets the exact same amount of money (LOL ikr but shhhh, let’s live out our dirtiest equality fantasies for a second ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)). Which would mean...

And now without the Epic Deal™:

Quod erat demonstrandum. Remedy has been selling their souls to Epic for €350 a month since 2017. (I don’t mean this as maliciously as I’m making it sound, don’t worry xD)

OKAY SO, O B V I O U S L Y, I have not the slightest idea what on earth I’m talking about so read this like you’d read a good fanfiction. We don’t know the different salaries across the different positions (and genders HAH), we don’t know if other parties were involved, I’ve completely ignored the sum that Epic themselves get, I have ignored taxes, I don’t know if my numbers are accurate (they’re definitely not I mean 505 must have more employees than 50), if I made mistakes (yes), and also somewhere along the way I forgot to use the €26.9mio budget figure because, uuh, I have no idea where to use it, what it means, where did it come from, where did it go, cotton eye joe - but oh well, I’m not starting over, take it or leave it.

So... I can now officially say I have written hot steamy economics fic xD Man I put waaay too much time into this but damn was it fun. Good three-hour-deep-dive (two of them spent munching on chocolate half-asleep listening to psytrance to keep my brain twitchy). Real-life-theorizing. Fuck capitalism. Don’t do drugs. Pet a cat. Wear your mask. Call your grandparents.

If there’s typos in this I’m sorry but also I’m not, I can’t be bothered to proofread again lol. Goodnight imma catch up on the sleep I lost. Gotta love full moons

#this is the first post in ages in which i used punctuation and capitalization are you proud of me xD #dw it won’t stay like this #control #control remedy #alan wake #ok now go yell at me how stupidly wrong and dumb this is i’m ready #do you think my old math teacher would be proud #i think so #my economics teacher... not so much

[monkey-network]

Good Stuff Ultimate: 1st Quarter

2020 has certainly left us already crawling for next year, but I say we shouldn’t leave all the good things behind. Time for a lightning roundup, no holds barred! 3. 2.. 1…

Kipo and the Age of Wonderbeasts

I couldn’t help but describe this as “Baby’s First Fantasy Adventure” like The Dragon Prince. It looks good, colorful, imaginative enough, but nothing about the story or characters pushed me to watch past episode 3 because I’ve no doubt seen stuff like this before but more interesting. It’s a good watch no doubt, but hardly groundbreaking to me. (Grade: C+)

The Owl House

Now this was more my speed. I definitely enjoyed the various designs of monsters and average Boiling Isle citizens far more. Eda immediately became my favorite witch character. While it reminded me a little too much of Gravity Falls, I was honestly hooked for more than just it’s otherwise eye opening demonic aesthetics. (Grade: B+)

Dorohedoro

Now THIS is a post apocalyptic series I’ve been waiting for in a while. Q really put together a world worth checking out, seeing its nooks and crannies, while giving us characters worth exploring with at every angle. She especially does a great job manga-wise where the black and white makes the edgy details pop in a meaningful way. The anime itself is just as good. Brought down by some wonky action scenes and movements, but the blend of 2D and 3D worked better than the Beastars anime. (Grade: A)

Keep Your Hands Off the Eizouken!

Talked about it plenty of times before, but this is that series that just speaks for itself, manga and anime. Smooth pacing, no contrived drama bullshit, hardly leaves any loose ends, easily accessible for anyone. It's the DMC5 of anime, meaning it is the most 'anime' anime I've seen thus far. (Grade: A++) 

Duncanville

Surprisingly not a wack family sitcom. The characters are what really sell the comedy, except for Duncan himself who’s not terrible but isn’t great as the star of the show, especially compared to his mom; and it’s weird cuz they share the same VA. Plus it’s actually well animated and stylized compared to the average Family Guy knockoff. It’s worth a check out in my book. (Grade: B)

Thundercats Roar

Oh wow, a nostalgia cartoon reboot that everyone will argue over but at the end of the day, is about as average as it gets. While I can appreciate the animation when it gets dynamic during its action scenes, I came out every episode remembering nothing and moving on. If I wanted a half hour centered around safe memes or forgettable punchlines, I would’ve subscribed to Jimmy Kimmel or ankle-beez by now. (Grade: C)

Harley Quinn series

This was a left fielder for me; the trailer gave a far different impression than expected. I can definitely appreciate how they treated not only Harley’s character, her relationship with Joker vs Ivy, but the rouge gallery of DC villains and heroes. What other DC product got me to love King Shark as much as this? Plus, Harley x Ivy are the OTP, but I appreciate them giving Kite Man some respect. (Grade: A-)

Birds of Prey

I didn’t mind the movie, but it lacked that dry punch that Harley’s series gave me. It was kinda the reason why I’ve seen people say Harley was becoming DC’s Deadpool type. even when Harley was a good star of the film. Didn’t help that Black Canary and Huntress were the only other characters I liked, and I don’t wanna get into the implicating homophobia. I want to say Sionis was great, but he doesn’t work when you have both the villain and protagonist be unhinged. All in all, I’ll give it the same score I gave Deadpool 1. (Grade: C+)

Dolittle (2020)

The movie’s climax was a long dragon fart and I wanted to die. (Grade: D)

Sonic the Hedgehog (2020)

A live action video game movie about an animated character. Let me put it like this: references and fanservice is not substance, taking place in the human populace does not help the escapism, reminding me that Olive Garden sucks ass is not funny, and only being half animated is cock and ball torture. If I don’t care for realism in my video games, this DOESN’T help. It has a couple good moments, but this is mostly unimaginative, by the book, and not worth going back to. Works as a Flash movie, I guess.  (Grade: C-)

Sonic Rebuilt

Sincerely the chad Sonic film of this year. Even when it’s a reanimated version of the 90s film, the creativity every artist applies for their respective scene brings better life to the original film like with Shrek Retold. Yeah, there’s live action segments in it, but it’s part of the gag not a crux of the film’s visuals. It isn’t fully original since they use the original’s voice work and music, but everyone involved gave a genuinely good spin on the pretty overlooked feature. Plus it has a Sonic that gets shit done and has the better voice. (Grade: A-)

Ishuzoku Reviewers

Kono anime wa igaito shinsendesu. Bōru o korogashi tsudzukeru hōhō o shitte imashita. Sore wa yoi owarai de, kesshite mumide wa arimasendeshita. Itsumo mitakatta ano etchina shirīzudeshita. (Grade: A-)

Meggy’s Destiny

The plot has its low points, but this is still an entertaining short film. The characters were what kept the ball rolling and the ending was that coup de gras on the main character’s overall story arc. (Grade: B+)

Trolls World Tour

This film works better than the first to me mainly because we can focus on Trolls and their musical world rather than the Bergens who didn’t offer much. The plot is simple, but it being a multi-genre musical kept me hooked. The finale especially was that cherry on top of this bouncy film. Also Poppy is still the best. (Grade: B+)

Glitch Techs

It stands to say Men in Black meets Captain N and Pixels works well as a premise for a show, and this certainly delivered by actually being ANIMATED. I’m sorry, but can corporations soon understand that premises and ideas that work better with animation stop trying to make it live action? Also, it brought Fanboy and Chum Chum back from the dead, and that is a worthwhile achievement. (Grade: A)

Doom Eternal and Animal Crossing: New Horizons

They’re honestly the same game from what I got to play. AC was a little more stressful than Doom, especially with managing my stalks, but they were both nonetheless an all around great time so they get the same score. (Grade: A)

Steven Universe Future

Had some shit episodes, had some delightfully fun episodes, and had a half shit/half delightful finale. Pretty on par for Steven Universe but I say it’s elevated above most of the original series with the grown Steven himself. Much as I wish his character was dealt with better, I was still invested in his story nonetheless even when the fixed perspective honestly fucked over most else in this series. It’s far better than season 5, not as good as seasons 1 & 2. So yeah, I liked it and I’m gonna miss this show. (Grade: B-)

Onward

The ending doesn’t make up for a pretty middle of the road film. If I wanted a film about familiar bonding in a goofy fantasy world, I could’ve just watched A Goofy Movie. The world feels creative enough, but it’s like Pixar has been losing their touch or mostly peaked when it comes to imaginative premises. I’m hoping Soul can bounce ‘em back cuz while this isn’t the worst, certainly didn’t feel like their best. (Grade: C+)

【ＡＮＤ　ＴＨＡＴ＇Ｓ　ＴＩＭＥ！】

Well that’s all for the first quarter of 2020. Quite above average all around, certainly some worthwhile things to keep your busy while this pandemic is upon us, except Dolittle. Were there any that I missed? Probably. Let’s see where the 2nd quarter provides as we carry on into the Spring months. 

Stay safe out there, and see you in June.

#kipo and the age of wonderbeasts #the owl house #dorohedoro #keep your hands off eizouken! #duncanville #thundercats roar #harley quinn series #birds of prey #Dolittle #Sonic movie #sonic rebuilt #ishuzoku reviewers #smg4 #Meggy's destiny #trolls world tour #glitch techs #doom eternal #animal crosing new horizons #Steven universe future #suf #pixar onward #cartoons #anime #reviews #long post #Good Stuff

[natasha-romanoff-deserved-better]

Children of Yesterday- Chapter One

Summary: 

Standing in front of him, are two more children, only slightly older than the one he had found. The blonde child was freakishly skinny with dark bags under his eyes, and was standing with another black-haired slightly taller child who had a bony arm wrapped around him.

The blonde was wearing an oversized Captain America costume that drowned him, and the other only wearing a leather jacket with sleeves that covered his hands and fell to his knees.

Tony almost chokes.

The blonde in the Captain America costume. The black-haired child standing over him. The scared, timid kid on his hip with glasses and bruises.

He knows who these kids are.

                                                        ~~

After an accident with the time stone, Tony and Rhodey are left with six of their teammates turned young children. Trying to keep the six young, traumatized and rambunctious children safe all while finding a cure and attempting to give them a taste of a real childhood might be their biggest mission yet.

Read on Ao3 here!   or continue under the read more! 

Tony blinks.

“Strange? As in, Stephen Strange?” He raises his eyebrow, disbelief filtering in his voice. “You’re telling me, the Sorcerer Supreme, couldn’t fight off a few Hydra goons?”

Nick sighs, a displeased frown on his face as he elaborates as if talking to children, “We don’t know what happened and we won’t know until we can actually locate Strange. But, for now, yes. We believe Hydra is in possession of the time stone based on energy signals we’re picking up in Italy.”

Steve cuts in. "So, what? you want us to go get it back?"

"That's exactly what you are going to do. This stone, we don't know much of what it can do. But we do know Hydra having this kind of power could be catastrophic.”

The team meets each other’s eyes for a split second, deciding if this was something they really wanted to do. Exhaustion from their last mission was still weighing heavily on them. Technically, they should all be on leave, a break well earned, not preparing for another mission.

“Guess we better let Thor know we’ve got another mission coming.”

“Actually, Thor is currently occupied. There is a situation in Asgard that requires his presence. We will continue to try and get in touch with him but, this simply cannot wait. I’m sure you all will be capable to perform one mission without him?” Nick raises his eyebrow, the question obvious and taunting.

A huff of air expels from Tony’s mouth, as he takes the bait. “Of course we can. I just about stabilized the damn middle east by myself.” He retorts as he takes another sip from his almost empty glass.

Rhodey eyes the glass warily.

Nick nods, and ends the meeting. Tells them the obvious, to get ready; and promptly hangs up the hologram call.

Steve stands, and nods at the team. “Alright, well. See you guys on the quinjet in twenty, then.”

“Tony.”

The engineer turns to face her, taking in her disapproving expression. He doesn’t feel like doing this with her again.

“I have to go, Pep.”

“You’re in no shape to be going on missions right now…” She takes a step forward. “It’s okay to take a break.”

“I don’t need a break. I need distractions. I need to not think.”

“You’re getting bad again.” The question, implicit in her statement.

“I’m not.”

“Tony…Ever since Peter got hurt last month you’ve been drinking so mu—”

“Stop.” The warning is clear, but giving up isn’t in her nature. Pepper doesn’t stop.

“But he’s okay now.”

“I don’t care that he’s okay now. Don’t you understand? He got hurt because of me. Me.”

“He got hurt because he wasn’t listening to directions,” Pepper chastises gently.

Tony doesn’t bother to respond. He turns back to his suit, adding some last minute tweaks to it, a product of his most recent overnighter. On his desk, his phone rings with another unanswered call.

“Okay,” Steve retightens the strap on his helmet, coming to stand with his teammates, giving them a nod. “The base doesn’t look big, but we still need to be careful. Widow—” He looks at Natasha, who steels her expression. He hands her a metal box, small enough to fit into her palm and plain enough no one who didn’t know would give it a second glance. “You go in, find the stone, put it here. Out of any of us, You’re probably best suited to sneak past everyone unnoticed. Clint, Keep her covered. Me, Stark, Bucky, and Rhodes will handle them and take them out on the ground. Sam, you in the air. Sound good?”

Agreeing silently, the team making minute changes to their suits and amour. “He isn’t the only one that can fly, ya’ know…” Tony grumbles. Steve chooses to ignore him.

As the group starts to disperse, Steve catches Bucky’s shoulder. “Buck, I want you to stay close to me out there, okay?”

Bucky sighs slightly at his best friend. He was still getting used to this side of him, this new dynamic between them. With him being the weak one now. “Steve. I’ll be fine.”

“I know, I know you will. But please. It will make me feel better.”

“Yeah,” He agrees, seeing the worry etched onto his best friend’s face. “Okay.”

It’s Bucky who notices it first.

They’ve been fighting all of ten minutes, Natasha half-way through the compound. The fight is unusually easy for Hydra. Something is off.  

“Uh…hey guys? I think some of them are taking cyanide pills. These guys just fucking dropped dead before I even touched them.”

“I haven’t seen anyone take anything?” Sam.

“You wouldn’t. We- they have a fake tooth that carries it. Makes it quicker.”

“What? Are they that scared of us?” Tony asks as he shots another beam from his palm, taking out five men at once.

“No. Not scared. Planning something.” Steve joins in. “Widow, how’s it coming?”

Natasha doesn’t respond, instead Clint’s voice crackles through the earpieces.

“We’re good. We’ve narrowed down where they’re keeping the stone and are almost there.”

“You guys wanna hurry that up? I don’t like the thought they might be up to something else. Bucky is right- these guys are dropping way too quickly.” Rhodey covers Steve and Bucky as he talks, urgency in his tone.

Tony hums. “You really think they’re going to d—” He’s cut off as something slams into his body, knocking him through the air. Around him, the world is orange and red with sudden flames.

“--ny? Tony? You gotta wake up man, I could really use some help here.”

Tony forces his eyes open at the voice ringing in his ears. Rhodey, he recognizes.

“Rhodes? Are you… crying?” He asks, stunned at the small sniffling he can hear over the communication line.

“No, Tony.” Rhodey sighs, exasperated. “But I can’t find the team.”

“What the hell happened?”

“They had the place rigged full of explosives. Offed themselves before. We’re in metal suits but the rest of the team…”

Tony doesn’t respond, instead pops his face shield open to look around himself better. Without the shield, he could hear the crying more clearly now. He glances around, narrowing in on a small figure several yards away. A child. What the fuck.

“Hey, kid,” He calls out. The black-haired child sniffles, rubs some dirt away from his face and turns his head in Tony’s direction. Tony forces himself to stand, limping over towards him. He picks up a small pair of cracked glasses and holds them out. The kid takes them, offering him a watery smile as he shoves them back onto his face. “What’re you doing here?”

“I don’t know.” Huh. Helpful.

“Are you hurt?” The child’s lip begins to wobble once more, and Tony groans internally. Before he can say anything to comfort the child more, Rhodey’s voice calls him again through his helmet, this time more urgently. “Okay, okay, I’m coming.” He mutters out.

“Alright, kiddo. I can’t exactly leave you here. So, c’mon, I guess.” Tony reaches out towards him, pausing slightly when the kid’s eyes grow wide and he flinches back. But he doesn’t protest, so Tony continues, grabbing the child under his arms and hiking him up onto his hip. It’s only then that Tony notices the child is naked except for a large pair of oversized boxers hanging off his hips.

He’ll figure that out later.

Tony carries the kid over to where to Rhodey is kneeling on the ground, his back facing him. “Rhodey! Look what I found!” he yells out to announce his presence, kicking himself slightly when the child on his hip flinches again. Rhodey whirls around, eyes wild but body slightly letting up when he sees the kid Tony is holding.

“Oh, thank god.” He breathes. Tony raises an eyebrow and closes the distance, craning his neck to see what Rhodey was kneeling over.

Standing in front of him, are two more children, only slightly older than the one he had found. The blonde child was freakishly skinny with bags under his eyes and another black-haired slightly taller child had a bony arm wrapped around him.

The blonde was wearing an oversized Captain America costume that drowned him, and the other only wearing a leather jacket with sleeves that covered his hands and fell to his knees.

Tony almost chokes.

The blonde in the Captain America costume. The black-haired child standing over him. The scared, timid kid on his hip with glasses and bruises.

He knows who these kids are.

“Oh, god.” His breathing catches in his throat as his stomach drops. “What the- What—"

Rhodey glances up at him. “Tony. You gotta breathe. Now is not the time to freak out. Focus, man.”

He closes his eyes, wills his lungs to work properly.

“Okay. Okay- what. What do we need to do?” He asks.

“I’ve already called emergency evac in. But I have no fucking idea where the rest of the team is.”

“Fri? Can you pick up the rest of them?”

Friday takes several seconds to scan the area before responding. “I cannot identify the team. However, I am picking up three more children. The closest one is approaching from your right.”

Tony whips around to find another young boy, stumbling his way over to the adults. He is wiping at his face, trying to clear the dust covering his skin.

“Sam?”

Sam jerks his head up, surprised by the unfamiliar adults already knowing his name, but nods eagerly.

“That’s me!” He waves a hand. “Are you here to help me? I don’t know what happened…”

Tony nods. “Yeah, yeah we’re to help. We’ll explain it later, okay? We need to find some other kids first though. Are you okay?”

Sam looks down at his body, wiggles his legs as he takes stock, and then nods.

They find Clint on top of a half-fallen shelf. It’s leaning dangerously to the side, which really doesn’t help Tony’s anxiety. He has curled into himself, high above the piles of rubble. "Clint!" Tony calls up to him. he sees the child curl tighter in on himself, his eyes narrowing.

Kids, Tony. He has to remind himself. You’re talking to kids.

He softens his voice. "Hey, Bud. I know you're probably pretty scared and confused right now, huh? It looks like your arm is a bit hurt, why don't you come down from there and we can help you." Clint glances back towards where Rhodey is standing with the other kids.

"Where's Barney?"

Tony probably should have expected that one. He doesn't want to lie to the kid. Really, he doesn’t.

"We'll help you find him, kid." Whoops.

"Are you from the government?"

"No, no government here. Just us.” He gestures towards the others. “We helped those other kids too, see?”  

Clint continues to frown at him, but he uncurls from his ball, carefully putting one foot down on a piece of wood under his body as he begins to lower himself down. Tony waits with outstretched arms and nods back at Rhodey.

"Well, there we go. Five down. Just need to find Natasha and-"

A gunshot rings out through the air. Without thinking, Tony rips Clint from where he’s almost to the last shelf, and curls around him protectively. Rhodey drops low, arms pulling all the children down with him to the ground. "Fuck, Fuck. FUCK," Tony mutters as his suit closes back around his body. "Rhodey? Keep them covered!" he yells and shoos Clint over to them. Friday is quick to alert him to a small heat signature- Natasha, crouched behind a fallen piece of the ceiling.

"Natasha? We’re here to help you.”

“Natas-uh, wait. Natalia,” He corrects himself. "Stop shooting" He moves towards the crouched figure. She shoots him again, landing a shot squarely on his heart. If it weren't for the Ironman suit, he'd be dead. It doesn't deter him, and he advances in, cornering the small girl in the piles of rubble. Her eyes grow wide as she takes him in, narrowing in on the place her bullet had effortlessly bounced off. She mumbles something in Russian.

"We’re not going to hurt you. But you need to stop.”

She calls out to him, something in Russian. Who are you? Friday translates in his ear. Natasha’s voice is strong, but he can hear the faint tremor she is hiding behind her Russian accent.

Against Friday’s advice, he opens his faceplate, allowing her to see his face as he speaks to her. “My name is Tony. I’m one of the good guys, yeah?”

Friday encases him in his suit before he can even realize she has fired another shot at him, this time at his face.

“Russian, Tony. She’s Russian. Why would the good guys be speaking English?” Rhodey mutters in between curses as he attempts to herd the other five children out of the crumbling building. From the sounds of it, it’s not going great. One of the kids- Steve, maybe- is arguing with him, telling him he wants to stay and help the robot man. Two other voices are then arguing with Steve, while one sniffling voice is asking if those are real gunshots. “SHIELD is about a minute out. You might just have to grab her.”

“Are you insane? I’m not going to grab her. Does she even speak English?”

“Tones, it will be a lot worse if SHIELD gets here while she’s still freaked. They’ll only scare her more and she’ll injure or probably kill someone.”

Tony frowns at the redhead in front of him. He crouches down, keeping his distance. “Okay, kid, listen. There’s about to be a lot more people here, with guns and they might not be as nice as me. So, we can do this the easy way or the hard way. You can walk out with me or I’ll carry you out. You choose.” He doesn’t know exactly how much of the English she can understand, but between his words and hand gestures, it seems she’s gotten the point. Her eyes only narrow more, and her frown grows, but she lowers the gun. He nods encouragingly at her, waving his hand to gesture her over. Still holding onto the gun, she crosses her arms over her chest and takes several steps towards him, somehow managing to not trip over the rubble even though she doesn’t take her eyes off him for a second.

She follows Tony outside, where the SHIELD jet is just landing, SHIELD agents unloading with Fury leading the way. As Fury draws closer, he visibly pauses when he catches sight of the children. He pauses for a moment, then slowly lifts his eye patch, as if he doesn’t trust his only good eye to be seeing correctly.

“Is anyone going to explain what the fuck I’m looking at?”

“Uh,” Rhodey says, “They blew up the time stone and…” At the same time, Tony makes a joke about introducing the “Minivengers.”

Fury ignores Tony. He looks at the kids, spending a few seconds on each one as he identifies and assess them. He sighs and pinches the bridge of his nose.

“Well, get them onto the jet, then. Let’s them get home.”

#look i actually wrote something #marvel fic #kid fic #my writing #children of yesterday #tony stark #bruce banner #clint barton #james rhodes #natasha romanoff #Steve Rogers #Bucky Barnes #sam wilson #marvel #marvel cinematic universe #not canon

[babyczk]

a christmas miracle — zk

summary: ashytn finds herself struggling to study for her english final, she enlists the help of the beautiful boy who sits behind her.

authors note: some more christmas fluff <3

•••

groaning, ashtyn collapsed into her seat in honors english. she was ten minutes early, a rarity, usually stumbling in right when the professor stood from her desk to address the class.

the blonde boy sitting comfortably behind her, looked up, startled from the book he’d been immersed in. ashytn shot him an apologetic half smile, hoping to disguise the look of pure angst on her features.

she was unlucky with that aspect.

he leaned on his elbows, thick eyebrows drawn down in, what ashtyn was shocked to see, concern. “are you good?”

her breath caught in her throat, caught off guard that he was addressing her. she’d admired zion kuwonu from a distance all semester. watching him whenever he walked in and out of the classroom from the corner of her eye. aware of his presence behind her everyday for three hours. she noticed him around campus sometimes, or in various coffee shops here and there. as well as the occasional instagram stalk, giddy to find that he didn’t have a girlfriend. but other than those at distant encounters, ashytn didn’t really know much about him.

“i’m fine,” she squeaked out. zion’s lips turned down even farther, clearly not buying her lame attempt at lying.

“you sure,” he pressed. “you look like you’re five seconds away from either bursting into tears or slamming your head on that desk.” he smirked at her, dimples faintly protruding, and man oh man, was ashytn a sucker for dimples. “and i don’t think it’d do your pretty face much if you slammed it on that desk.”

ashytn blushed, thankful that she’d already caked on copious amounts of glossier cloud paint, so it wasn’t obvious. “uh, right...” she mentally slapped herself, cursing whatever higher power was above. why did she have to be so awkward? “i guess i’m not doing okay, i’ve just been struggling to study for this final next week,” she admitted solemnly.

”what grade are you pulling right now?”

“almost a d, which means i need to get an eight five or higher to pass.”

zion looked on in thought, oblivious to the volume increasing in the room as more students filed in, eagerly taking their seats. ashtyn felt envy for them. it seemed like she was the only one struggling in this class, mostly because her major was film, not anything related to english, and she was only taking this course for a college wide elective credit. one of many horrible mistakes she’d made.

“i could tutor you for the final,” zion spoke suddenly, her gaze focusing back on his face. he was serious, no trace of a smirk anywhere. “i’ve got a decent grade going, and it’d be motivation for me to study too.”

ashytn mulled it over for a second. there wasn’t any harm in taking up his offer, other than the fact that she’d most likely catch a heart attack with being in such close proximity to zion for a few hours at a time. ‘twas a risk she was willing to take.

“sure. if you think i’m tutorable, i’m all for it.”

a wicked grin pulled at his lips. “is that a challenge?”

ashytn shrugged, feeling a surge of confidence. “maybe.”

zion clicked his tongue against the roof of his mouth, winking. “mamas, you have no idea how much i love a challenge.” a cold shiver ran down her back, but before she could respond, the professors voice boomed over the class, quieting all conversation, and tearing ashytn and zion’s intense gazes away from each other.

•••

after class, ashytn and zion had exchanged numbers, promising to meet up the following friday afternoon to begin their session. after parting ways, ashytn began to feel the nerves settling in. she was about to be alone with zion for the first time in approximately two days for god knows how long.

she shouldn’t be as nervous as she was. she’d been alone with boys on multiple occasions, boys she’d found attractive and boys she’d had extreme crushes on. but something about zion was different. he was different. and there wasn’t one particular thing ashytn could place her finger on that made her come to that conclusion.

much to her dismay (and also pure excitement) friday afternoon came around quickly. sitting in the empty campus library, the only sounds coming from the ticking of the clock behind her, ashytn kept wringing her fingers together, biting down on her lip. it was three o’clock, and zion would be walking in any minute.

subconsciously, she smoothed down her hair, wishing she’d added more gel as she could feel her curly flyaways creeping forward. in the midst of that action, she felt a presence standing above her, looking up to see zion and his damn cute smile.

“hey, been here long?” he asked, sliding into the chair opposite. ashytn dropped her hands from her hair, shaking her head.

“only a few minutes.” a lie. she’d arrived two hours early to mentally prepare, but of course she was never going to let zion know.

he smirked, and she shifted uncomfortably. something about the smirk made it seem like her lie wasn’t really going unnoticed as she’d assumed. fortunately, if he suspected anything, he didn’t let up. instead, pulling out his notebook and textbook, flipping them open before looking up at ashytn expectantly.

“ready?”

she blinked, before springing into action, opening her own books. it was a study session after all. ashytn didn’t know why she expected something other than studying to miraculously happen in this empty library.

emphasis on empty.

“alright, so we should start with virginia woolf’s, to the lighthouse. it’s probably going to be a big part of the final since that’s all we’ve been talking about in class.”

she nodded, pulling out her ratty copy of the book. zion raised his brow at the condition, and ashtyn smiled shyly. “it’s my mom’s copy.”

he raised his hands in surrender. “i didn’t say anything.”

“yeah, but your face did,” she prodded, causing him to laugh.

“alright, alright. so, have you finished it?”

“sure.”

“which means you can tell me your analysis of the ending.”

“just because i read it doesn’t mean i understand it,” ashytn deadpanned. “virginia’s writing makes me want to end it all.”

“that’s why sparknotes exists,” zion said.

brows raised, ashytn narrowed her eyes. “cheating?”

“it’s not cheating if you’re looking at it for inspiration,” he defended. “c’mon, let’s pull it up.” and for the next hour and a half, zion spent it explaining the ending as well as the rest of the book to ashytn, having her read snippets out loud a couple of times. by the end, she was beginning to understand the material so much more than when she’d come in.

packing up their things, zion stood up first, patiently waiting for ashytn to finish. “i’d say you’re pretty tutorable, in case you were wondering.”

“might be the first to admit that,” she joked.

walking side by side out of the library, zion laughed. “so, what are your plans for christmas break?”

“driving two hours home and spending the rest of the month with my family and then coming back here for the new year. you?”

“planned on going to spend christmas with my friends family since mine is halfway across the globe,” he answered. “should be fun though.”

they crossed the library parking lot, ashytn coming upon her car. they idled outside of it for a moment, her unlocking the door. “do you need a ride somewhere?”

“nah, i promised myself i’d stick around and study for the rest of my finals. gotta keep that gpa up if i wanna keep going to school for free.” he smiled cheekily, and ashytn felt her knees drop a tad at the sight of his deep dimples.

“oh yeah, for sure.”

“but, i’ll see you. don’t forget we got a session tomorrow.” a final grin and zion was turning to walk away.

“we do?!” she yelled out after him, slightly confused since she thought they’d basically covered everything that was supposed to be on the final in today’s time.

he whirled around, still walking and causing his blonde locs to fall his face. “we sure do, babygirl.”

dear god, ashytn thought.

•••

every tutoring session after their first had been productive. ashytn’s nerves around zion had subsided eventually, and she’d fully melted into her true personality around him, being able to crack jokes and poke fun whenever she was able to grasp a concept faster then him.

walking into her honors english class the day before break, she was more than ready to take her final, casting zion a little smile as they each sat in their respective seats. pencil hitting the paper, ashytn breezes through the booklet. obviously not as fast as zion, hearing his chair scrap back from behind her. his fingers drummed on her table as he breezed past her, his way of letting her know she would do amazing. she smiled against herself, ducking her head back down into the questions.

after another twenty minutes; she was handing in her final, feeling more confident then she’d felt in a long time when it came to that class. pushing open the door, she stepped out into the hallway, when a hand landed on her arm. she jumped in shock, turning to see zion leaning against the wall.

“how you think you did?” he asked, hiking his bag further on his shoulder.

she cocked her head. “you waited out here for me?”

he shrugged, and ashytn was surprised to see his cheeks splattered with blush. “i mean... i didn’t have anything else to do... or go.”

ashytn hummed, enjoying this side of zion. “well. i’m positive i didn’t get less than a b. and it’s literally all because you offered to tutor me, so thank you.” without thinking, ashytn stood on the tops of her toes, planting her lips on his cheek ever so softly. her body froze, realizing what was happening, and as she was pulling away, zion gripped at her waist, one hand cupping her cheek, before pulling her in fully.

his lips brushed against hers, and ashytn hadn’t realized how desperately she’d been waiting to feel this. it was like they’d kissed a million times before, everything coming with ease.

pulling back, zion was smiling wide, dimples on display. “sorry, i couldn’t help myself, plus....” he trailed off, pointing above them and when ashytn looked up, she almost snorted. sitting perfectly on the ceiling was some mistletoe, wrapped up in a red ribbon.

she shoved at zion’s chest playfully. “you stood under here on purpose, huh?”

“i’d like to think of it as some kind of christmas miracle.”

#christmas vibes #zion kuwonu #zion kuwonu imagines #zion kuwonu fluff #prettymuch #prettymuch imagines #writing

[scornedlove]

Chapter Twenty-Seven

CHRIS

A couple of weeks had gone by since I promised myself I’d give Tae some space. It was disappointing that she’d only hit me up once since then, especially after I revealed so much to her the last time she was here. I really opened up to her in hopes of gaining her trust, maybe that’s why I’ve been buggin. Without her conversation, it’s hard to keep my mind off of Robyn. The last time I saw Robyn, she not only looked like a stranger, but she treated me like one too. Between her and Tae, my heart was torn and it was all too much to deal with. 

Every time I felt myself getting in my feelings, I’d hit the studio, blast some music, and paint. It was like having a therapy session, which is how I was spending my Friday afternoon. I was in my zone, finishing up my third project this week when Taylor called, inviting me to go riding with him.

“Hell yeah! I had fun last time, but I wanna take it out where I can really put some gas to it.” I suggested, jumping at the chance to borrow his motorcycle again.

“Alright, I got you. I know just the place.” he promised, before we hung up. I finished the painting I was working on and stepped back to look at the finished product. 

Diamond always gave the cutest pouty face when I wasn’t moving fast enough for her. I couldn’t get it out of my head, so I put it in paint. I snapped a picture of it and sent it to Tae before leaving, hoping that would put me on her mind.

“This chick wants me to meet her at the A for some drinks” Taylor announced when I got to his place.

“When ya’ll planning on doing that?”

“Right now, I told her 8. ″

“Then why you ask me to ride with you?” I asked, noticing it was fifteen til. “I’m not trying to be the third wheel”

“You won’t be. She’s bringing her roommate, so I told her I’d bring my brother” he added, with a smirk.

“I’m not going on a double date with you man, you know I got a girl.”

“It ain’t a date, unless you want it to be. I know that long distance shit ain’t gonna last too long.”

“Shut up fool. As long as you don’t get me in no shit, it’ll last as long as I want it to.”

“We’re just gonna hang for a bit, then take em on a ride. The ladies love that shit and I’m tryna get some ass tonight.”

“Well I’m not-”

“-Stop being a tight fuck. It ain’t all about them, come chill with ya bro.”

“Alright man, but don’t be mad if they both feeling me and you end up coming home empty handed” I teased as he tossed me the keys to his Harley.

We arrived twenty minutes later than expected due to traffic, but the girls still hadn’t made it. We found a spot at the bar, ordered a couple of beers, and watched the Saints play the Falcons while we waited.

“It’s looking like you got stood up lil bro” I stated when I noticed it was nine and still no sign of the chick he described.

“There she goes” he nodded towards the door when a familiar, dark skinned woman walked in. “She bad ain’t she?”

“Oh, hell naw. I heard this bitch was fuckin with Anthony a couple of weeks ago. You need to be caref-”

“Fuck Anthony. That’s yo homeboy. Besides, I’m always careful.” he stated, gulping down the rest of his beer before standing to greet Kiki.

“Small world. I would’ve never guessed y'all were brothers. Ryan gonna be shocked as fuck.” she cackled, getting comfortable next to Taylor as Ryan walked in. She was on the phone, eyes fixated on Kiki as she strutted past a couple of guys checking her out. She didn’t even notice me until she ended her call, a couple feet in front of me.

“Hey” she smiled, surprised to see me. “When Kiki told me she set me up on a blind date I was nervous as hell”

“Oh, this ain’t that.” I explained, tossing back the rest of my beer. She rolled her eyes at my bluntness and sat on the stool in between me and Kiki.

“Obviously, you shut that shit down already. I’m just glad you’re not some fucking weirdo.” she admitted and I couldn’t help but burst out in laughter.

“I see ya’ll are on good terms again” I nodded towards Kiki, who was cheesing like a schoolgirl while Taylor whispered in her ear. “I’m glad I didn’t get involved in that”

“Yeah, it didn’t take long for Anthony to hop on the next bitch” she shrugged nonchalantly. “How do you even know him? He doesn’t seem like someone you would associate with.”

“Shit, we go way back.  He’s changed for the worse, that’s for damn sure. ”

“Well, at least one good thing came from him”

“What’s that?”

“He’s got some good connects. He introduced me to a DJ who’s been working with me on a couple of songs, even helped me land a couple of gigs when we were on good terms.”

“Good. Sounds like things are looking up for you.”

“You have no idea. I’ve been crazy busy. Matter of fact, I’m performing for this charity event in a few weeks, you should come.”

“Oh yeah? Send me the info. This is a crazy time for me too, but I should be able to work it in”

“Alright, but let me know either way. Don’t just leave me hanging.” she replied, before getting the bartender’s attention. They ordered margaritas and we settled on one more beer while we watched a little more of the football game. I wasn’t interested in the game, or getting drunk. I was ready for the adrenaline rush from flying through traffic, so after the ladies finished their drinks, we hit the road.

It didn’t take long for me to regret agreeing to do this with the girls. I’ve been abstinent for a solid five months now, and I haven’t seen Tae in over a month. Having Ryan’s double D’s on my back and arms wrapped around my waist had my man standing tall. I did my best to keep it to myself, but she got a couple of feels in. 

Nevertheless, we rode across the Pacific Coast Highway to the infamous Neptune’s net, where we hung out for a little while, had dinner, and smoked a blunt by the beach, before heading back to the city. That’s when I realized those couple of feels weren’t an accident, they were intentional. I don’t know if it was because she was tipsy, but Ryan couldn’t keep her hands to herself. I was cool about it the first time, but then she slipped her hands in my pants while I was driving, and I damn near wrecked trying to pull over.

"If you want to make it home without having to find another way, you gonna have to keep your hands above my waist” 

“Were you feeling violated? Because it looks like you were enjoying it.”

“Fuck that. I’m tryna keep shit platonic between us, but if you can’t handle that we can’t do this anymore. I’ll find you a ride, but I’m not doing this with you”

“Fine. I’ll stop.” she stated, throwing her hands up in defeat. She behaved the rest of the ride, but when we made it to her place, she invited me in and was offended when I quickly declined.

“Well, you know where I am if you wanna talk or whatever” she stated before sashaying towards her front door. The deep ass swing in her hips made it evident she wanted more than a conversation.

I waited as she dug in her purse, searching for her keys until she gave up and made a call. By the look on her face as she walked towards me, I knew bad news was coming. 

“Kiki has my house key and she’s not answering. Is it cool if I stay at your place tonight?”

“You gotta be kidding” I sighed in disbelief. “Ya’ll set this shit up huh?”

“Really? Don’t flatter yourself. A simple yea or no will do” she sassed, almost tripping over her own foot. 

“What other choice do we have? Let’s go” I shrugged, handing her the helmet back. She was fucked up and I didn’t want to be here all night waiting for a damn key, so I decided we’d deal with it tomorrow. 

ROBYN

“I can’t believe I’m doing this”

“It looks great and it’s almost done, no need to fuss now” I reassured Mel as I wrapped my arms around her for comfort.

Today I finally went through with covering the matching tattoo Chris and I’d gotten a couple of years ago on some drunk on love shit. Halfway through, I almost chickened out, so Mel made me a deal. She said she was done with tattoos before, but if I went through with this one, she’d get one of my choice blindfolded. So here we were, both with swollen hands, only mine was three times the size of hers.

“Alright, ya’ll know the drill. Keep it clean and dry.” BB, my tattoo artist, stated once he finished her design. “and you really need to baby yours Robyn, here’s some extra ointment. It should help with the pain too.”

“Awww shit! This is dope!” Mel grinned after uncovering her eyes. Capturing moments was inked flawlessly in script on the side of her left hand.The moment we were settled in the back seat of John’s ride, she snapped a pic and sent it to J.  

“I’m obsessed! Girl, fucking with you, I wasn’t sure what to expect, but it’s perfect. You did good”

“Give jack he jacket!  You know I don’t do you dirty!” I teased, grinning from ear to ear. 

“Yeah, but you been wilding ever since that shit with Chris and Dre.”

“Bitch, you not even supposed to be saying the C word” I snapped, narrowing my eyes at her.

“Speaking of Chr- I mean C. Has he reached out to you since?” she continued, ignoring my annoyance.

“No. I guess I scared the shit outta him when I mentioned the police, but Aundre’s ass won’t stop calling”

“So you’re not talking to him either?”

“Nope. I’m taking your advice and leaving both of they asses alone.“

“We’ll see how long that lasts” she snickered, rolling her eyes, as if she knew I was to weak to go through with it. I hated when she did that.

“Don’t do that.’

"What”

“Don’t play dumb. I’m sick of that shit.”

“Chill out, it ain’t that serious”

“I am serious Mel. Don’t shoot me down like that. Not everybody got they life figured out by 24.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?” She quizzed, shaking her head. “I’m still figuring this shit out too. Everything ain’t smooth sailing over here either.”

“I find that hard to believe.” I scoffed, crossing my arms and wincing from the pain of brushing my freshly tatted hand against my clothes.

“I don’t complain all the time and I don’t wear that shit on my sleeve, but yeah Rob, I be going through some shit too.”

“Like?”

“Like my husband working seventy hour weeks and my married boss flirting and making passes at me all the fucking time”

“Michael?”

“Yeah, anytime we’re alone together he gets a little too close and happens to accidentally brush up against me the wrong way or says something sexually cryptic ”

“You lying! He’s fine as hell, but don’t fuck around with a married man. Matter of fact, you should just leave that job. These things always end up ugly”

“I’m not stupid, but I’m not leaving my job either.”

“Why not?”

“The amount of money I’m making with him is crazy, I ain’t gonna get that anywhere else.”

“Girl please, you have J. Who cares about the money? It ain’t worth the money, you need to quit”

“Easy for you to say. I’'m finally making good money and I’m not ready to let it go. Over a couple of ass grabs? Naw, imma milk this cow. Maybe I’ll be able to open my own shit one day.”

“Well all I gotta say is don’t slip up and lose ya husband over nothing stupid.”

“I would never jeopardize my marriage. J has made me a better person in so many ways, I’d be stupid to fuck up something this good. ”

“Fi true” I agreed, before John Legend’s All of Me started blaring from her phone.

“This my baby calling now” she gasped, a smile creeping across her face as she answered in her sexy voice. I couldn’t help but feel a little jealous as they flirted back and forth. I had to turn my attention to the starry sky in order to successfully tune her out. Instead of obsessing over my own sad love life, I  looked for constellations while reminding myself of all the frogs she had to kiss in order to find her prince. 

CHRIS

“CHRIS WHAT THE FUCK!” Tae’s unmistakable voice pierced my ears, snatching me from dreamland. It took a minute for it to register that she was standing right in front of me. Then I realized why she was screaming.

“Get up Ry-” I attempted to wake Ryan’s drunk ass up, but she was out cold. We passed out sitting up on the sofa watching Rush Hour, I don’t know how her head ended up on my lap. It may have looked a little bad, but Tae was definitely exaggerating.

“SO THIS IS WHAT YOU REALLY DO WHEN YOUR BY YOURSELF! I KNEW  IT. YOU’RE A LIAR! ”

“BABE!” I yelled over her to get her attention. “You buggin. We’re fully clothed. Nothing happened.”

“And that makes this okay? Your fucking ex is laying in your lap!” Lose my number!” she screamed throwing my key at me and running out the house.

My mind was yelling for me to run after her, but my legs wouldn’t move. Is that really all it took for her to walk out on me again? If so, what is the point of this long distance shit? What was she even doing in Cali? I haven’t talked to her in days and she just randomly shows up to act like this. I had so many questions, but at the same time, I didn’t care for a single answer. I felt a weight lift from my shoulders as I realized something. I’m single again. 

#rihanna #chris brown #ff #fanfiction #fanfic