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mego42 · 3 years

Note

Hii!! I was wondering if you plan on continuing Swear on a Silver Knife?? That first chapter got me hoooked!

Hi!!! I super am and I am so! extremely! pleased! you like it, that fic is my weird little unexpected but deeply beloved baby tbh.

I’ve been making myself to stay focused on song bc it’s so close to being done, but once that’s up, I’m getting right back into swear. I already have ch 2 fully drafted (though in need of some rewrites and editing), 3 halfway drafted, and the rest worked out in a pretty detailed outline, so I’m feeling good about picking it back up once song's finished.

in the meantime, please enjoy this snippet from ch 2 for your troubles (it is nsfw in case you’re in a pharmacy or garden center or what have you)

Beth looks to the basket she’s using in place of a bedside drawer. Eyes the little pouch containing Annie’s congratulations-on-divorcing-your-trash-husband present. It’s an idea, anyway. It’s not like she has to think about—she won’t think about...anyone—thing. Specific.

Shucking off her jeans, Beth flops down on the air mattress and grabs the little pink vibrator. Her old one—and oh God does she hate thinking about it, wondering what happened to it, who’d seen it—had been a pretty standard issue: cylindrical, twist the base, press the button, and there you have it. This one’s smaller, intended only for external use, came with modes. It was quieter too—not that that mattered anymore.

Lying back, she wiggles a little, trying to get comfortable, grimacing as the plastic mattress squeaks against the floor. She really should bump an actual bed up her list. If for no other reason, her back can’t take much more of this. Then, closing her eyes, she presses the vibrator on, jolting as it hums to life.

For years Beth’s...alone time has been pretty, well, vague. She’s never been all that into porn. She knows there’s quality, feminist stuff out there but has never quite had the time or patience to find it on her own, and the thought of asking...

It’s bad enough that her little sister has bought her not one but two vibrators now; Beth doesn’t think she could handle Annie’s commentary on Beth knowing or not knowing how to use them.

And Ruby, well. Beth’s always been acutely aware her marriage hasn’t been remotely comparable to Ruby and Stan’s and she’s never been able to bring herself to talk to her friend about anything that might bring that to the surface. Beth knows Ruby wouldn’t judge her, but in some ways the thought of her sympathy is worse.

Anyway, as a result, Beth’s developed a very...potent imagination.

She imagines sensations, feelings, being touched deliberate and intent and knowing. Being able to let herself go. It’s always been general or vague—hands, lips, skin—she’s never been big on specific scenarios.

It’s only recently that her fantasies have turned...particular.

Hands have developed calluses that fit the grip of a pistol, adorned by rings, a cold and biting counterpoint to her flushed skin. Lips have turned lush and expressive, quirking with sardonic amusement, falling slack in awed reverence. Skin has become burnished and velvety smooth, stretching taut over hard muscle, decorated with swirling black ink.

No.

Beth’s eyes pop open and she stares at the blank, white ceiling above her. The soft buzz of the vibrator carries on, even as the heat that’d started to gather dissipates.

She huffs out a breath.

You think any of them can do this to you? You think anyone else can?

Gritting her teeth, Beth shakes her head, forcibly clearing her mind, then closes her eyes and tries again.

She concentrates on the hum of the vibrator, the thrumming sensation against her skin. She focuses on each spike of her pulse, following each thread of heat twining through her, imagining fingers drawing patterns across her skin.

She thumbs the intensity up a notch, a soft moan escaping as she clamps down on nothing.

Her legs tingle, muscles twitching as the heat crawls down them and Beth digs her heels into the air mattress, her hips canting, searching, chasing a memory. A phantom hand slides up her thigh and she throws her head back, imagining a cool night breeze against her fevered skin, the sound of laughter echoing across a city square underscored by the sounds of late night traffic only a few feet away and when she blinks her eyes open, for a split second she sees a face silhouetted against a streetlight and she bucks, coming up off the mattress and—

No.

Flopping back with a frustrated groan, Beth fists her free hand in her blankets, gritting her teeth and shaking her head to clear the memory.

Okay, fine, maybe she wants specific. It doesn’t have to be—

Casting about for a memory, any memory she can latch on to and use to block out...anything else, Beth remembers the class this morning and Bobby’s hand splayed wide across Mandy’s stomach.

That’ll work.

She clicks to the next setting, gasping a little as the steady buzz turns to a rolling wave, a pulsing sensation that ebbs and flows, drawing out her pleasure with each undulation.

Beth whimpers, spreading her legs a little more to get a better angle. Her eyes fall shut and she concentrates on the image, imagining the feel of a hand—Bobby’s hand—big and warm and heavy against her stomach, fingers spread wide and dipping low, then lower. The heat builds, smoothly, steadily, each cycle of the toy stoking it higher, and higher, and pretty soon she’s arching, rolling her hips in time to the vibrations.

She flicks the vibrator up, the buzz intensifying and she bucks. Her necklace shifts, the charm a shock of cold as it flips and falls against the hollow of her throat. She remembers the feel of another pendant dangling, tapping against her collarbone in time to the movement inside her. Remembers tangling her fingers in the chain, the links biting into the crease of her palm as she used it to tug him down to her. Then the taste of him, rich and smooth on her tongue, as she’s kissing him and kissing him and kissing him and he’s kissing her back, a nearly frantic urgency in the press of his lips and the way his breath gusts shakily against hers as they move together, scaling a peak, the edge looming closer and closer and then she’s—

Not thinking about Bobby anymore.

No.

Beth rips the vibrator away, her whole body trembling, muscles spasming and heat pin-balling around her nervous system so close but not quite enough to push her over.

She flops back down on the bed, toy still clamped in her hand, humming uselessly, the noise loud and obscene when it’s not muffled by her skin. She stares up at the ceiling, blinking away the memory of the blank expanse awash with the afternoon sun, streaming in through the gauzy curtains.

The ceiling stares back.

Fuck.

#oh god i miss this fic #am def hype to jump back into it #ty v v v much for asking about it anon!!#my fic #swear on a silver knife #shut up meg

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jujutsubabe · 3 years

Text

Being friends with Gojo🦋🦋

A/n: ok last friend post with everyone’s fav teacher😌

This man is a TEASE!!! I just know if you breathe a little funny he will clown on you so hard

The two of you just bag on each other so much, you will get frustrated and straight bark at him to shut up while he continues to poke fun at you.

He doesn’t take any of ur comments seriously 😌 he doesn’t mind letting you have the last word but it’s funny seeing how long your banters will last

✨FaceTime!!✨

He likes to get on ur nerves so u already know he loves debating with you

This man will start talking about topics he knows!!! will start a debate with you, like he will just randomly call to debate on something so dumb and trivial saying “Chocolate and cheese go well together don’t you think?”

“Yeah...” you weren’t even listening until the comment starts to digest and you freeze. “Wait what...? Are you crazy?”

*cue an hour long argument as to you explaining why chocolate tastes better with anything else and Gojo insisting otherwise*

(Everytime you talk he turns the volume all down until he sees you stopped talking, then he will turn it up just to insert his opinions again and hear you get even more frustrated)

This lasts until you’re like “You know what...?” *face time ended*

He calls like two hundred times after, and once you finally pickup all he only says, “I won.” Before hanging up😐.

he would def call you at two am only to show you a cool bug outside his window, ESPECIALLY if you hate bugs

(However if you got a spider in your room you can count on him to grab it for you😌 he might chase you around with its nasty carcass but he will exterminate that bug!)

He would def call you in the middle of a mission to show off 😭 I just know Megumi is pissed off.

This man will really set up the phone so you can see the fight, but after like three seconds the phone will drop and have a “poor connection!” Warning before hanging up😭

Right after he will call you all giddy, “Did you see how good I am?”

“Yeah you’re good at this Gojo.” You didn’t see it but you would rather act like you did so he’s happy.

You guys could be on the same mission and he would FaceTime you while you’re in the middle of a fight

You would pick up thinking there was an emergency and he needed you to meet him somewhere, “Gojo? What’s wrong, is everything okay?”

He would grin before flipping the camera to all the curses he took out, “I bet you can’t beat me—“

*FaceTime ended*

Movies!!!💿💿

You find it kinda sweet that Gojo likes to watch movies with his students!

Gojo would def put something scary on so he can see you all squirm and jump around, your reactions are more entertaining than the movie

Whenever you try to relax he will sneak behind you and grab your shoulders, “boo!”

Of course you would jump a hundred feet in the air, cursing him out for scaring you as he laughs.

Nobora would call him so immature as she talks about how she can’t wait to have you as a teacher.

“It’ll be so fun! I’m sure you’re a great teacher!” Itadori perked up.

Nobora nodded, “Mhm, I can’t wait to go on missions with you! She seems so mature doesn’t she?”

Megumi nodded while they all hyped you up.

If your nose wasn’t in the air already it sure was now, “Oh please...you think so?” Your ego is at it peak rn😌😌 these kids are so precious

Gojo would pout as the kids gave you all those sweet praises, and with your confidence boosted you turned to Gojo with a wide grin, “I win.”

Whenever it’s just you two watching a movie, he will take up as much space as he can on the couch before you sit, then pat his lap and be like “You can sit here y/n!”

“Definitely not.” You sat on the floor, you would die before sitting anywhere near that mans lap 😐.....😏.....or would you.....

Once he stops being a jerk he will make space for you, but he is def the kinda guy to rest his arm behind you, idk hot guy things 😌

If you happen to nap on his shoulder expect him to draw on your face or tickle your nose until you sneeze.

Self care 💅🏽✨

Nobora brought a bunch of her beauty masks for Itadori and Megumi and would invite you “You should really take a break!”

Before you can respond Gojo replies, “You’re too kind Nobora!” Gojo won’t even be invited, he just hears you’re doing something and wants to tag along.

(He enjoys seeing you frown, He doesn’t verbally express that he enjoys your company, he does it through teasing you)

I know this man has the clearest most well taken care of face ever I just know it. You guys are all doing your own thing, Nobora painting her toes, Itadori delicately placing cucumbers on Megumi’s scrunched up eyes, and you inspecting Gojo’s face.

“Your pores are so small!” You turn his head in your hands, “and no black heads, how is this possible?”

He shrugs as you continue to talk, he doesn’t care about what you put on his face, he just likes having his face held (especially by someone he trusts!!)

He loves being held and touched and scratched so like 😭 while you are brushing his hair back with your hand and putting little clips in? He is in heaven!!!

While you apply the mask, man’s eyes are falling shut cause this is like a face massage!!

He will lean his head into your hand and flutter his eyes open “I’m really pretty.”

I mean,,,, he is right,,,,,You roll your eyes, “Go back to being quiet.”

Would get his nails painted, like a different pastel color with cute little stickers for each finger so he can kill curses with pretty fingers.

You really don’t understand how you two became friends. (You enjoy his fun energy but you would never admit that!!!)

Scary situations!!👻👻

if anything happens you can count on him to protect you!! He will be there for u no matter what!

Idk how but if you took a mission that’s a bit out of your league, give him a call and he will b there in half a second

He will show off so hard in front of you and leave you really shocked then be like “You good?”

“Yeah, you weren’t busy were you?”

“I’m not gonna be too busy for you.” He holds his hand out to help you up as you grin at how cheesy he is. He will def call a ride for you and ride in the back with you.

Will use jokes to make you feel better/ help you deal with whatever was bothering you.

Once you get out the car expect him to give you a hug, you don’t even gotta ask

Like a big long dramatic hug, and he’s so tall so he’s towering over you and it looks cute.

When you’re ready to let go and say, “okay... alright.... see you—“ he only squeezes you when you try to squirm away.

You roll your eyes before resting your head on his chest.

He’ll pat your head before when he’s done.

“Don’t die ok.” You grabbed his sleeve before he could walk away.

“That won’t happen, you don’t die either ok Y/n!” He smiled as you waved him away and went in your house.

He likes being ur friend 😌

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clichesadmusic · 3 years

Text

Ranboo Lore Recap (April 29)

so today....happened (I AM SCREAMING INTERNALLY MY TWO FAV CHARACTERS TECHNICALLY INTERACTED I AM SO HAPPY AHH)

The villain returned:

Intro piano music with black screen instead of his normal blue one.

Screen goes to complete black, is totally silent (no music) as he opens the game and goes onto the server, first words being “Oh, shoot.”

When he logs on he is still on top of L’manhole

“I’m seeing dead people again.”- Ranboo

(note: none of his usual stuff is on screen, he already stated that donos would be off but the subgoal, follower goal and even his watermark are gone which usually remain when he is doing lore)

Ranboo talks about how hard it is to deal with knowing that someone that made his friends' lives so terrible is back.

“Obviously I don’t like the guy.”- Ranboo

Ranboo tabs so he can see who is on and notices that Phil is there. Ranboo realises that he has to tell Phil, as he farms wheat by the community house he practices what he’s going to say to him….it doesn’t go great but there’s not really a good way to say it.

Ranboo makes his way towards their home and goes over what happened so that he can tell Phil.

“I shouldn't rehearse, I should say it naturally.”- Ranboo

Ranboo hypes himself up as he makes his way to Phil’s door.

He greets Phil and makes him a “chair” to sit down.

Ranboo tells Phil….everything. The plan for the prison, Ghostbur going in as cover with Tommy following, how Tommy came out with Friend and without Ghostbur.

Phil doesn’t put together that Ghostbur is “dead” until Ranboo says it, even then he doesn’t believe him because “Ghostbur is a ghost.”- Phil

“Ghostbur being gone is the good news….”- Ranboo

“....Wilbur’s back….he’s alive”- Ranboo

Phil seems very happy saying that it “changes everything.”

“I wonder if he’s any different.”- Phil

“He said that he was in a train station or something for like 13 years.”- Ranboo

Phil keeps looking up at his picture of Wil. “13 years is a very long time to be away, he might not be the same person. He certainly isn’t the same person actually. This changes a lot.”- Phil

Phil tries to get Ranboo to explain what Wilbur ways saying and how he was acting but this was Ranboo’s first time meeting Wil so he doesn’t really know.

Ranboo tells Phil that Wil thinks that the current state of L’manberg is his fault. Ranboo also tells Phil that Wil originally didn’t know him but then said he knew a lot about him.

“What I’m scared of now Ranboo is what has he been thinking about this whole time.”- Phil

Phil says that he needs to prepare for when Wilbur comes to see him, saying that they have a lot to talk about.

Phil says that he’ll talk to Ranboo later and leaves.

Throughout Ranboo keeps saying that Wilbur seemed happy and that “he didn’t seem that bad”. (Ranboo is def an optimist about how much people can change).

Ranboo looks at the blue in his inventory, goes silent for a moment before saying in the saddest voice “Ghostburs gone….I just realised that. I’m gonna miss Ghostbur.”

“I think that Wilbur has probably turned over a new leaf.”- Ranboo

Ranboo talks about how Wilbur seemed to be really fond of Tubbo. But he also knows how Wilburs actions have affected Tubbo. (He is very concerned about Tubbo, for obvious reasons)

Ranboo flips through his memory book to the last page where enderwalkboo responded to him saying “this is what I have to do” (aka stop conflict).

Ranboo says that he needs to keep a close eye on Wilbur and that there are only a few people who can help him with that.

“I know exactly who I need to go see”- Ranboo

“I just have to make sure...that he doesn’t do anything too bad.”- Ranboo

Ranboo runs through the nether, back through the main portal.

I think that Wilbur has probably turned over a new leaf cause if he hasn’t *pulls out axe*, then we are in for a wild ride.”- Ranboo

“Cause then Tubbo. Michael and Tommy will be safe.”- Ranboo

Ranboo jumps down to the hole where The Council has most recently reconvened (originally it was a joke about the 6 endermen holding grass block that had all gotten stuck in the staircase down to Ranboo’s strip mine, they were accidently let out because of a creeper explosion but Ranboo found another group of endermen in a different hole that he has redubbed The Council).

He asks The Council to keep an eye on Wilbur for him. “Let me know what he does. Make sure that if anything happens tell me. Just...let me know, okay?”

He leaves the hole. “The Council usually helps me out with that stuff. Especially since I re-learned how to talk to them” (confirmation that non-enderwalk boo can talk ender).

“I guess we’ll just have to wait and see what happens. Just wait for the letters. Oh! That means I have to make the mailbox for them.”- Ranboo (I love this, I love this so much).

“Is it my duty to tell people? What do you think particles?”- Ranboo (I love when he refers to us as particles, I don’t know why, it’s just so great)

“*reads chat giving him totally conflicting answers because it’s chat* *laughs* you guys are useless. ”- Ranboo “A lot of you guys are saying no…”

He goes looking for crying obsidian for the mailbox, going back to his place.

“Something tells me that I’m not gonna have to tell people honestly.”- Ranboo

Ranboo decides that he should put the mail box in the original meeting area (the entrance to his mine). He talks himself through building it as if there is a specific format it must be in (like a nether portal for example) in order for it to work, implying that this is something that he has either done before or has seen be done.

“Hopefully by the time I get back I will have news about what happened.”- Ranboo

He blocks off the mailbox room with dirt.

“Re-learning how to speak enderman was a fantastic idea. See that's a good thing about the experiments at least! Before I could kind of say hello sometimes...”- Ranboo

Chat/Particle: Explain the experiments?

Ranboo: No, I don’t think I will.

(at this point he turns the subgoal and dono alerts back on)

“When Tubbo described Wilbur to me he said that he really liked debates.”- Ranboo

(music comes back on)

Ranboo decides to fix up the courthouse a bit.

“We’re gonna fix Wilburs courthouse. Maybe he can warm up to me. Cause I hope he likes me. First impressions are everything. I just wanna get on Wilburs good side y’know.”- Ranboo (Ranboo’s need to be liked by new people is just a little too relatable man).

Ranboo says a couple of times that he is aware that Tommy didn’t seem to like Wilbur when he saw him but that Wilbur has been gone for a long time and has hopefully turned over a new leaf.

“I like to remain neutral in most things. But if the council comes back with bad news then obviously I’m going to protect Tuboo by any means and make sure Tommy is also good.”

“When push comes to shove I’m probably gonna be on Tommy and Tubbo’s side” *eyes emoji*

Dono: He did say that Dream was his hero

Ranboo: Yeah, he did say that Dream was his hero. Ohhhh….I forgot to mention that to Phil. Whoops….probably should have to Phil that he sees Dream as his hero…..probably a bad guy…

Ranboo says that him and Tubbo were playing chess while they waited for Tommy to kill Dream.

Ranboo realises that he needs to keep the knowledge of the nukes away from Wilbur.

He writes a note to Phil telling him about how Wilbur said that Dream was his hero. “Heya phil! Quick thing that i forgot to mention...Your newly revived son considers Dream his hero! So read into that what you want! Just thought you should know haha- Ranboo the Beloved”

He put the book and quill (not a signed book) into a chest he leaves in Phil’s house that he labels “Mail for phil”

Ranboo realizes that Wilbur doesn’t know about him and Tubbo being married or about Michael but decides that this is fine.

#dream smp #dream smp recap #dream smp summary #ranboo #ranboo lore

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peach-pops · 4 years

Note

Hello if you're not busy can you write a HC with Daichi, Bokuto, and Kuroo and how they act when they drink at a party with you?

Thank you for this request!!!! Lets just age them up to college!

Daichi, Bokuto, and Kuroo at a College Party

➣ Daichi

He’s such a responsible drunk like he is the best boyfriend to have at a party. Like I’m sure all of these guys would be super protective of you the whole night but Daichi is on another level

He is always pouring drinks for you because he doesn’t know everyone at the party and he doesn’t want someone to try and pull a fast one

Daichi always has a hand either wrapped around your waist, resting on your hip, or holding yours because he wants to keep an eye on you

Even if Daichi is having the time of his life, he is always making sure you’re okay

Lots of “ Do you want to sit down?” and “ Let me know when you want to go home, okay?”

He’s def the boyfriend where if you have longer hair, he wears a hairband or scrunchie on his wrist so he can pull it up to a ponytail if you’re sweaty or throwing up

I know he sounds super protective, which he is, but that doesn’t mean he doesn’t have fun. Think about it, he is always babysitting his teammates so when he has the chance to let loose, he takes the opportunity

Daichi is a classic Budweiser man I stand behind that and I do not take complaints

He doesn’t really play drinking games. He likes to go to parties either to hang out with friends he hasn’t seen in a long time orrrrrrr KARAOKE

Even if there isn’t a karaoke machine, he’ll always sing super loud whenever a song comes on that he knows and that alone makes the whole party sing along

If the songs are trash he’ll take over the AUX and have the whole house bumping and that’s a fact

No matter how drunk he gets, he still uses common sense so if one of his friends tries jumping off a table, he scoops them up and off the table before they even attempt it

Daddies intuition what can I say

I know there’s that trend where how the Haikyuu boys catch it when you’re throwing back AND I KNOW DAICHI CAN CATCH IT

He’s such a smooth motherfucker and he loves when you do it because he knows other people are watching

I am simping so hard for this 2D man

➣ Bokuto

Bokuto is clearly a frat boy that isn’t in a frat if that makes sense

Like he hates all of the shaddy shit that goes down in Greek Life

The idea of that false sense of brotherhood and hazing sets him off but but he radiates playing beer pong with sunglasses and thats a fact

He has that energy where “ the party doesn’t start until Bokuto walks in” because he always brings it up another level

If you went to a party with Bokuto, be prepared to have all of the attention on the two of you because this boy is even LOUDER than usual

Sober Bokuto is already a proud boyfriend so the alcohol would only dial him up even more

Lots of “ This is my s/o aren’t they so cute????..... OF COURSE THEY ARE HOW COULD YOU SAY THAT?”

“ Kotaro they were agreeing with you.”

“ Oh my bad man! Y/N, be on my team for beer pong!”

He would know everybody at a party and even if he didn’t know some random person there, by the end of the night they would definitely be best friends

Bokuto never really gets too drunk but seemingly everyone around him does because he is such a big hypeman and maybe that could lead to peer pressure but he can’t help it

He won’t ever force you to drink but if you are drinking, he hypes you up constantly

“ THAT’S MY BABY AYYY! LETS GOOO!”

This boy is so affectionate when he is drunk, he loves telling you how amazing you look and how happy you make him while he gives you a bunch of kisses across your face

His breath smells like Malibu but you don’t even mind THAT much

He gets sappy sometimes and he loves attention so if he’s giving you kisses but you don’t, he gets whiny asf

“ What about me? Where’s my loving? “ cue Bokuto pouting as you roll your eyes but of course you can’t leave your boyfriend hanging

Bokuto can party all night but once he sees that you’re tired or you’re done with partying, he will say his goodbyes and gets an uber so you guys can go home ( NONE OF THE HAIKYUU BOYS DRINK AND DRIVE AND I STAND BY THAT)

➣ Kuroo

I don’t care what anyone says, Kuroo is a freaking dork and he should be treated as such

Sober Kuroo is a huge ass nerd so when he drinks, he’ll make random-ass, smart comments throughout the night as if it’s common knowledge

“ Baby did you know that the hydrogen atoms in your body are almost 13.5 billion years old because they were created at the birth of the universe?”

“ What are you even talking about?”

“ I don’t know but I need some water, my head hurts- hey where did Kenma go?”

He is just sooooo talkative when he drinks like he’ll talk people’s ear off and somewhat annoy them but Kuroo is just so oblivious it doesn’t even bother him

He also loooooooves dancing. He’s such a bad dancer in real life like I’m sorry that hoe has no rhythm at all but when he is drunk??? The flavor is immaculate!!

He dances like a stripper at a bachelorette party I-

Grinding, thrusting and smirking and he thinks he is just being so sexy which he kinda is I mean LOOK AT HIM

If you’re just sitting on the couch talking to a friend, 10/10 times he will try to give you a lapdance while you’re trying to have a conversation

“ Yeah I mean these finals were so rough-”

“ Did someone order a lapdance?”

“ What are you- TETSURO!”

He would never have sex with you if either of you are drunk but he’ll still you slow kisses on your neck if the two of you find yourselves alone because he just can’t help himself

His choice of drink/game would be bodyshots because again, just look at him do I really have to defend this statement? He is a tequila whore and a sexy beast so the will totally be up for doing body shots off of you but he will get sooooo pissed off if someone even tries doing it off of you

Drunk Kuroo is the love of my life thank you

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strangerfictions · 4 years

Text

Fight Part II

Prompts: “don’t give me space. That’s the last thing I want from you”, “I know I shouldn’t be here”, “What’s this between us?” - Pinterest

Summary: Billy told you something that you didn’t expect while you were suffering from concussion, so you ignored it until Billy started to ignore you. With the help of Robin and Max you realize you have something to tell him too, so you make the decision to talk to him and see where things go.

Warnings: A lot of angst and a bit of fighting maybe?

Words: 2194

Read Part One Here!

A/N: Okay so I have been working on this for a few weeks now. It has taken me so long thanks to both college and the fact that I had to restart it about five times because it didn’t flow well or just didn’t feel right. This is the first time I have done a part two of a fic I have written, and I am super happy with how it turned out. This has now been sitting in my rafts for well over a week and I have been meaning to post it! Hope you all enjoy! Feedback is greatly appreciated!

Edit: I had to repost this thanks to tumblr acting a bit weird but hopefully thi time it works out a little better!

It had been a week since the fight and things between you and Billy couldn’t be any more awkward. Billy still brought you to and from school but there was never much of a conversation. The night of the party was a little blurry for you thanks to the concussion, but you could remember everything he had said to you. You still couldn’t take it in, but you wanted to move on, but Billy was making that difficult for you.

It was a fresh week and you hoped that meant Billy would be back to himself. Like clockwork you hear his car come to life and you run downstairs shouting a goodbye to your parents. Before you even get into the car you can already tell Billy is still being awkward. He is sat bolt upright and refusing to even acknowledge you coming out of your house. You were sick of this and you were determined to say something.

When you get into the car you notice his black eye and split lip. You couldn’t help but wince knowing the exact pain he was in.

“Hey” Billy just nods driving down your street.

“Really? You are still being weird with me? Why are you so damn stubborn? It’s like you are going out of your way to make me feel like its all my fault when you were the one to confess to me!” You raise your voice slightly not meaning to, but you can tell from the look on Billy’s face that it has an effect.

“Fuck seriously Y/N? You know how hard this has been on me? First you beat up my fri3nds and then this shit. It takes two to have a conversation and last time I checked you didn’t put much effort in either!” You recoiled back into the seat a little as Billy begins to shout at you. You can feel your eyes begin to sting and so you turn and look out the window watching Hawkins pass by you in a blur.

“Maybe if your friends weren’t such dicks Billy, I wouldn’t have to get into a fight with them. They aren’t the ones who patch you up after every damn fight you get in are, they? They are all the type to peak in high school Billy and it looks like you’re going to be the same” Your voice cracks and luckily Billy pulls up outside school and you quickly get out before he can say anything else.

You walk towards the doors pulling them open as you hear Billy shouting after you. You run down the hall passing Steve and Robin who try to catch your attention before you go into the bathroom. You enter a cubicle and try to calm yourself down. You hear the bathroom door open and shut and the tap of shoes across the tiles.

“Y/N? You okay?” Robin calls out through the bathroom. You reach out and unlock the door pulling it towards you and leaving the cubicle.

“Yeah I’m fine. I had another fight with Billy and I just needed to calm down a little sorry.” You walk over to the sink splashing cold water on your face as Robin sits up on the counter beside.

“Again? I blame the sexual tension between you two!”

“Robin!” You were surprised she would even say such a thing.

“What? I always felt there was a little tension between you two and then I saw how he acted after the fight and I knew there was something going on there!” You nod knowing you had to tell her what he said to you. You check that all of the stalls are empty before saying anything.

“Well that night when he brought me home, he told me he liked me, and he has been really off with me and that’s what we fought about today. I brought it up and he got a little angry and so did I and we both said things we regret. As per usual…” You sit up beside Robin who has a massive smile plastered on her face.

“Wow I knew it. This is pretty big Y/N! Please tell me you told him you like him back because if you didn’t, I understand why he isn’t talking to you!” You wince at what she says remembering the night.

“I was concussed I didn’t know what I was saying!” You try to defend yourself, but you know Robin is right.

“Shit you’re right…I hate that you’re right. Can you ask Steve if he can give me a lift home?”

“I know I’m right I wouldn’t say it with full confidence if I didn’t know I was right! Yes, he will give you a lift he has no choice!” The bell rings and Robin pulls you towards your first class.

All day you have done your best to avoid Billy. You knew you couldn’t face him after everything you said. You knew what you said was wrong and would effect Billy because he already thought it was true. By last period you were ready to get home and collapse into bed and sleep for the rest of eternity, but you knew you had to apologise to Billy. Mo matter what it took.

By the time you got home both Steve and Robin had hyped you up to tell Billy that you do in fact like him a lot and that you regret everything you said. You wouldn’t blame him if he hated you for everything you said but a small part of you hoped things would work out. As you walk into your house you are hit with smell of cookies. It almost as if your mom knew you were having a bad day.

“Something smells good” You say as you push the door open to find the entirety of the Hargrove family sitting at your dinning table.

“Y/N! I invited the Hargrove’s over for dinner. I was a little surprised that you hadn’t come home with Billy” You put on a fake smile hoping it will conceal everything going on.

“Oh yeah…I had to stay behind and do some work with Robin for an English report so Steve said he would drop us both home. Actually, mom I’m not feeling to great I think I’ll pass on dinner I’m going to go and do my homework” Your mom doesn’t question anything and allows you up to your room.

You get changed into comfy clothes and get started on your homework. A little while later you hear a light knock on your door. You turn around to find Max standing at your door with a plate full of cookies.

“Hey kiddo!”

“Hey…I guessed you might be a little hungry since your not actually sick” Max sits down on your bed handing you the plate of cookies.

“How did you know?” You ask taking a big bite out of the still warm cookies.

“Billy’s guilty face” You smile knowing the exact face she is talking about.

“Funny this time it isn’t just his fault. I messed up…said a few things I shouldn’t have and now I need to apologise and tell him something pretty big” You sigh savouring the taste of the cookie before swallowing.

“That you like him?” You snap your head towards Max who has a big smile on her face.

“God first Robin now you…I swear you two are literally sisters separated at birth. How did you know?”

“Intuition and the weird tension between you. It’s very obvious…even my mom has noticed it” Max grabs a cookie and takes a huge bite out of it

“Shit…I…I’m kind of surprised by that actually. I guess I should bite the built all things considering. It’s not like I have much left to lose.” You finish your cookie and grab another one.

“Exactly! I better see you getting in his damn car tomorrow morning and him smiling because I’m sick of him being in this crap mood!” You nod knowing what you have to do now.

After awhile they all leave and its just you and your parents at home. You lay on your bed and think about what to do and how to tell Billy. You can hear the lull of the TV from downstairs as you take in the noises around you. You hear the rain hit your window as you watch as it drips down hitting the frame.

Your parents go to bed early and you decide there is no time like the present. You get u and pull on a hoodie and some shoes. Thankfully you are on the ground floor so you can jump out of your window easily. You run across the road to Billy’s house. The rain getting heavier the nearer you get to the front of his house. You quietly walk around the side to his window. As you approach you can see his light is still on and as you get closer you can hear he is listening to Def Leppard. You stop outside his window and knock lightly catching his attention straight away. He looks up from whatever he is reading. You can see him visibly sigh as he gets up to open his window. You watch as he walks towards you. You cant help but feel the nerves build in the pit of your stomach. In one swift push Billy’s window is open.

“What do you want?” Billy whispers as you play with the sleeve of your hoodie.

“I know I shouldn’t be here, but can we talk please?” You ask quietly hoping not to wake his family.

“Why? So, you can insult me again? Don’t think so Y/N” Billy goes to close the window, but you place both of your hands on the windowsill.

“I’m sorry okay! I didn’t mean any of it and it was cruel of me to say those things because I know that’s the opinion you have of yourself. It was such a shit thing for me to do and I regret it so much because I might lose you and I really cant imagine life without you. I’m sorry about fighting with your friends, I’m sorry for making you look after me, I’m sorry for not telling you I love you and I’m sorry for being such a shit person sometimes” The rain is even heavier now as you continue to confess everything to Billy.

“Shut up and get in here” Billy holds out his hand helping you into his bedroom. As soon as you are in his room, he drops your hand and walk towards his bed throwing himself onto it.

“Thanks” You mumble shifting from one foot to the other starting to feel uncomfortable.

“So, you love me?” You look up from fiddling with your fingers to find Billy smirking at you.

“Uhmm…yeah I did say that didn’t I” You begin to pick at the skin on your finger as Billy stands up from his bed.

“And do you mean it?” Billy asks as he stops in front of you. You take a deep breath in before answering.

“I mean it, but I don’t want to make things weird between us” You say quietly

“I think it’s too late for that princess” You both laugh as Billy tucks a strand of hair behind you ear.

“So, what is this between us?” Billy takes you’re hand and leads you to edge of the bed sitting down together.

“I don’t know Billy whatever it is I don’t want to get hurt” You say holding his hand in yours.

“You know I’m not like” He was right you knew he wasn’t what the rumours made him out to be.

“But if you need space, I’m willing to give you it.” You hear Billy’s voice crack a little causing you to look up to find him looking away from you.

“Don’t give me space. That’s the last thing I want from you Billy!” You place your hand on Billy’s chin and tilt his head towards you. You can see the thoughts racing through his head as he begins to process everything. You are unsure on where you go form here but you hope it will involve talking to each other again.

“If you need space I…” Without thinking Billy leans forward and kisses you. You’re caught off guard and so when Billy realises you aren’t kissing back, he begins to pull away. You wrap a hand around the back of his neck and pull him back towards you, lips smashing together. The passion between you two fills the room and the tension lifts as the kiss continues. Billy is the first to pull away to catch him breath. You struggle to open your eyes after the sheer bliss you had experienced from the kiss.

“I don’t want space either…I guess we should go about this the proper way so Y/N will you go on a date with me?” You can’t help but smile at Billy’s attempt at doing things traditionally.

“Sure” Billy pulls you in for a hug as Def Leppard continues to play in the background. And just like that everything is back to being normal.

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prole-my-tariat · 3 years

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Long post about American politics -specifically California and how we are fucking up.... it’s a good read, just a lot.

Okay, I just want to remind everyone of of few things as we draw closer to a legit recall vote on Gavin Newsom.

1) This movement stated as (and still emplofies) a calling for the worst kind of people - This began with a group of people who just haaaaaaaad to go outside because they were over participating in basic human decency. Then, billionaires used the vaccine debacle as a jumping point to get taxes lowered. Please don’t think they care about wether or not we get vaccinated. They just don’t want to pay taxes.

This has morphed into a call to arms over CAs vaccine response. They are hiding behind a legit issue to push their anti worker narrative.

We need to stop seeing every problem as one sole persons fault. This is a product of late stage capitalism and white supremacy. We are so fixated on “American individualism” that we oft forget that these things don’t happen because of one individual person. Corporations use this against us constantly!!

Newsom is not perfect. He was an idiot to go to that dinner and he rolled over and ended the stay at home order like a fucking idiot. BUT CA has so many more issues that were always going to make a vaccine rollout hard:

- we have the largest state population in the nation.

- there are not enough medical workers for our population.

- many people in our state are undocumented and we can’t and should not leave them behind. They are often skeptic of any database that might take their name and age (and most likely ask for a social). But without adequate medical personnel, getting into each county can be difficult.

- people are still not following covid guidelines!!! We have had huge spikes in hospitalizations and deaths. How can the health care workers we do have give vaccines if they are over worked at hospitals??

- I would not look at other states already vaccinating 20 somethings(outside of high risk) as a win. This means that the vaccines were not distributed with the population in mind. This is such a theme in our country and it goes back to individualism. State individualism. States just don’t have to care that NY and CA have higher populations because it is just not their problem.

- those states are also showing a world wide failure. Young people here should not be getting vaccines, while elders in the developing world are dying because their countries can’t compete with 1st world buyouts.

-vaccine costs. Fuck Bill Gates. He convinced companies to patent and sell the vaccine rather than donate. A fucking asshole.

This brings me to my next and most important point:

2) WE CAN NOT HAVE CHANGE WITHOUT SOLITION!!!

As leftist, I see this trap all of the time. Change is good and needs to happen, but if we let certain things happen without solution, we leave a vacuum for fascism. We cannot let a dangerous group have the answer.

Let’s consider the current candidate to replace Newsom, a tech billionaire. He promises lowered taxes, higher pay for teachers, and a $2000 payment for ever child in California. Pretend everything he says is not full of shit and he is actually going to pay every teacher 70000/year (and not break it up by income in each county....as he def would) and that he will pay $2000 for every kid (will this extend to our undocumented children, probs not).

Please please understand that the lump sum payments we are offered will NEVER amount to the money we loose by not taxing billionaires adequately. This supposed higher pay will not stop teachers from having to use their own money to provide supplies for their classrooms/kids. It won’t change the ridiculous housing market. It won’t fix our school buildings. It won’t provide after school programs. It is a eye catcher, not a solution.

If we really want to provide more funds to schools, we would repeal prop 13. That prop is the fucking biggest joke and hold up of our state. We are allowing huge corporations, such as Disney, to pay property taxes from the fucking 70s!!!!! Property taxes are supposed to fund k-12 schools. But we are not receiving that money, so our schools go underfunded.

Though it gets worse, we supplement a lot of that dispenancy using state tax. This takes away from infrastructure, social programs, affordable housing supplements, etc...If that and sales tax are cut, we loose that funding too. It’s a downward spiral with only one group in a good position. The 1%.

“But these companies are threatening to leave to Texas/Florida, where there are little/no taxes!”

Fucking let them try. We don’t have higher taxes in our state for the fucking hell of it. We have higher taxes because the current capitalistic structure requires a lot of underpaid skilled workers to keep these corporations going. Withthis work force comes families, Schools/education, housing needs, medical needs, shopping, dining, etc.... the social programs needed to barely keep the working class breathing are paid by taxes. The programs created to make it possible for the work force to live an hour away from their under paid job requires taxes. You need large infrastructure, room, accessibility. Taxes go up when corporations go in. Texas and Florida will not remain tax less or low on taxes. They will have to compensate the workforce that comes with these billionaires.

Billionaires know this. If they didn’t they would have jumped ship long ago. They want their California homes and they know they need the working/undocumented class in this state. AND specifically the infrastructure built around and for these working working class peoples (it also keeps the working class away from them). They are going to do everything they can to bleed us dry, while keeping their fourth beach house and their new offices.

We are hyped right now due to the GME stonks “revolution.” We need to keep this energy going. The one percent do not flourish without us. And I am done just barely surving.

Be wary of any promises to cut taxes, they will never benefit you and lump sum payments are created to keep us quite.

The other two candatites I’ve seen circling are Uber right wing jokes. They spread Q bullshit and use really deragatory language.

Don’t. loose. your. fight. They are getting scared because they have had to accept that the masses aren’t stupid. That’s another reason for them to push to open the country. The working class has never been less intelligent, they have just had less time. We have time now. Use it to show that this system can destroy them too.

Thanks for reading. I’m going to end up writing a paper on the danger and destruction of American Individualism, but message me if you want to discuss it.

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grizztheexplorer · 4 years

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Ep 10!!!!! Love Victor live reaction:

-finally!!!! Never thought i would be rooting for the dad but here i am. I hateeee he doesn’t trust Isabel nor that he wants to tell her to not do things. But i ain’t with Isabel equating what she did to him beating up Roger. Girl fuck Roger.

- I don’t need to watch further to KNOW someone heard Benji talk to Victor in the bathroom and I bet my ass it was Andrew bc drama

- I KNEW TAKE THIS HOMOPHOBIC ASS OUT OF HERE

-“whatever happens between us” are they gonna separate??? I thought before i started the show i saw a spoiler of divorce (hadn’t read why or anything) but i feel like if the separate for a while they could actually find their way back to each other??? I hope they try living apart and all for a while bc i do wanna root for them. Also i reallyyyyyy fucking hope she doesn’t get with Roger again s2. Like i said, FUCK that guy.

-okay is still fuck Andrew hours but AT LEAST him not even thinking of outing Victor gets him out my blacklist.

- TOO GOOD A GUY TO WALK AWAY FROM IM JUST GONNA GO CHOKE IM STRESSED

-LISTEN IK MIA IS STILL AN ISSUE HERE BUT VICTOR HAS BEEN SO REPRESSED AND SAD AND BENJI HAS HAD TO DEAL WITH DEREK BC THATS THE GAY GUY HE GOT AND LIKE G O D DEREK IS SUCH AN ASS DID U SEE BENJI’S FACE WHEN VICTOR WAS LISTING GOOD THINGS?? THEY BOTH DESERVE A CHANCE AT HAPPINESS IM CRYING

-also uh don’t think I didn’t hear Derek say “i feel weird at a high school dance” sir Benji ain’t a senior he’s a sophomore. Is Derek out of high school?? A college kid dating a sophomore in HS is🤢🤢AND he treats him badly??? Jail

-im crying🥺🥺🥺listening to Benji and Victor talk has also lowkey made me realize like even if they haven’t interacted as much Victor has allowed himself to be jusy a teen with Benji even if they have talked about heavy stuff. With Mia unknowingly he did the same with his parents. Showed her the version of him she wanted to see bc of guilt, fear, and in order to make her feel better. Victor has only been him with Benji (and with Felix) and wow. Didn’t notice until their talk and me starting to think back on the show. Perfect writing.

- is heartbreaking how Mia found out. I’m wondering if maybe she’ll be hurt but understand??? She’s a 15-16 year old smart girl. At that age i def saw cases like this and it always ends with the straight partners supporting the gay ones. Hell, a case EXACTLY like this happened my freshman year of HS. These really popular girl started dating this new kid and she was obsessed with him lowkey?? They broke up bc he came out and she was the most supportive. I understand she’s hurt bc he cheated, but i hope she listens to him and tries to understand like how hard it is for queer kids and how confused he was? Is heartbreaking bc he truly cares for her and im sure right she thinks he doesn’t and just used her. But i hope she’s willing to listen. As a queer person, I honestly understand all the shit Victor has done. Is not the best way to do it. But I don’t feel angry at him. I get it.

- ugh the song for that kiss was perfect tho🥺🥺

-omg I totally thought him talking to Mia would be a cliffhanger are they gonna have a confrontation now??? She’s still so raw😭😭 i want them to be besties noooo

-LAKE OMG GO OFF. Poor Wendy tho she was hyping herself up to ask Felix🥺

-THAT WAS SO CUTE FELIX AND LAKE ARE AT THE TOP OF THEIR GAME BC 🥺❤️

-lowkey Andrew didn’t try to intervene and instead got with Mia to take the opportunity but also im 1000% not surprised of the straight person not wanting to hear his side and instead taking the girl where they can be alone together 💀💀may I say though with their history i do not think Andrew and Mia should be alone together. She has feelings for him yes, but she already regrets having sex with him bc she was feeling vulnerable. He didn’t know it the first time but this time he know how she felt and how she is feeling now. So this time it is kinda taking advantage if he ends up having sex with her.

-Pilar girl i get it but also the queer romance life of ur brother is literally.... none of ur business and does NOT affect u the way ur parents’ relationships affect u. So please kindly stfu.

-thank Pilar hugged him back

-hell yeah Andrew said no. U still out the blacklist buddy good for u

-SIMON SAYING YOU’LL ALWAYS HAVE ME IS THE TIP THATS MAKING ME CRY AGAIN BC YES THAT GAY COLLEGE SQUAD IS ALWAYS THERE FOR U AND I HOPE WE SEE IT AGAIN S2

- :)))))))) that ending :))))))))

S2 thoughts:

- okay well a lot of truth bombs. I truly think separating was the right choice to get them back together in a healthy manner. That is if they don’t date other people. Roger will most likely make a comeback. She will most likely date him. Maybe she’ll realize what a shit bag he is when he does/says something dumb and realize Armando is it for her??? I hope at least i do wanna root for them

- im so proud of Victor🥺🥺 he told everything to Benji, and came to out Felix + his family. Ik things will be hard with Mia at first, and Andrew is still no saint so he might be a dick to him on the team once he is out (or might defend him) but at least they know too. I saw the writers saying s2 will be now about Benji and Victor learning to be in a relationship and Victor’s environment changing. Benji and him will def struggle in the department that Victor is still learning how to openly be himself and let himself be seen versus Benji already having dealt with that before. So it will prob be hard for Benji too. It’s exciting tho and i hope despite everything s2 is kind to them.

- backetball will be hard for Victor without a doubt. I really hope Bram and Simon come for holidays or something and we get to see them again. Maybe even meet Benji or Felix too that would be so🥺🥺🥺

- can’t tell how the parents will react. Ik he won’t be kicked out and certain things will he hard bc s2 is gonna be about them working it out for sure, but I can’t tell if at first they’ll go in complete denial or will just quietly ignore it or fully pretend to be supportive while they aren’t. I hope s2 shows us the end of that scene and how the reactions went and not just a time jump. We will most likely start with a time jump but i hope the first ep of s2 shows us the reaction through a flashback.

Overall: amazing actors. Really good writing. These were realistic characters who make dumb realistic choices and are heartfelt and down to earth. All the actors are amazing and bring so much to the table. The writing is great dropping small hints for things to come without it being screamed at your face so you aren’t surprised 100% by certain choices but also not completely expected. And it’s honest about teens’ journeys at that age with appropriate age actors (except for Andrew I haven’t looked at his age but motherfucker looks older then ME lmao). I can’t WAIT for s2 and again, leaving it to existence so it happens: LET SIMON AND BRAM HAVE A LIL EP WITH VICTOR AGAIN IN S2!!!!!!

#love victor

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griefprofiled · 4 years

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3. 8. 14. 16. 30. 38. =)

i'm starting a kickstarter to get joel put down

What current rp trend do you hate? Nothing jumps out about current ones tbh, and since i'm mobile i don't have to see most formatting thank god lmao. i guess it classifies as current bc it always comes back around, but i dislike the cognitive dissonance that pops up where ppl drag anyone writing Bad People but are too lazy to commit to the stance by going for the source material writers; like do what u want but if u don't commit to it then it's real transparent that u just want back pats rip

Name any three things about the rpc that bother you. 1) the anti thread dropping obsession, go chat and get hype and do a new one like an adult. 2) that thing ppl do where they're like i left and no one noticed. that's literally just how ppl work, and it's disingenuous to pretend that not realising u haven't been on dash for a few days means everyone hates u, just say ur insecure and go. 3) the don't kill my muse thing ppl are highkey about lmao idk who needs to hear this but they're literally fiiiiine u can just click new post and bam never happened

Do you think rp has had a positive or negative affect on your life or you as a person? defs positive, vibing on the same hype wavelength collectively is a great thing

If you could change one thing about rp on tumblr, what would it be? Why? take away the anon feature for a month so ppl have to say things on main or sit down lmao bc what am i if not a capricious god

How have you responded to popular slang used on tumblr? Do you use it in every day life? Do you use it at all? i very much enjoy the evolution of language and vernacular so absolutely lmao, i say oof ten times a day outloud and not a single person can stop me

What advice would you give to someone new to rp? take an if ur not having fun u can go home view from the start. marie kondo it. do what sparks joy, exclusively. fuck everything else. also don't let anyone tell u that ebbs and flows are a bad thing, if u can't turn the fuck up again after six months when the hype train has rolled back around, whats the point

#thiingswelose #;;tldr ppl make issues of nothing bc theyre bored and want validation #;;instead of just Asking

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lucidpantone · 4 years

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So what's next? The wedding? Or wait no the custody of their children fight? And lastly a date... because why to have coherence right?

similar anon: How's wine?...I'm not going to shit on Wtfock because I love them and all the fandom is doing that rn hahaha I do have to say I'm aware of the mess this season seems to be and I hope episode 3 gives us something good! 🤞But hey Noa dancing and rap is amazing! Let's appreciate that...

similar anon: You think this mess of episodes means we are gonna have finally some action?! Something interesting?!

similar anon: Do you think they cut clips or did they really plan this short of an episode? Like, I’m really wondering if the are changing the plot while filming based on fan feedback or something...

(little spoiler long rant)

I am drunk fockers!!! A bottle of wine in and I got some thoughts bishes. Firstly please watch this clip drunk its so much better drunk(if your legally of age). I cried laughing the first time and this time I was just moyo’s hype girl the whole time. I was rocking my ny yankees cap backwards jumping up and down in front of my tv screen yelling “come on son!!” it was great. I was in the bars fam!! I wish you all could have been with me. Ok the season so far and the clip...... Like are D&D from GOT producing this season because my god the lack of flow is astounding and the craziest thing is wtfock has the ability to publish txt to weave certain bits together like yesterday there could have been a text exchange where moyo texts kato being like “got your number from luca and i just wanted to apologize today but you left your job before I could”. Like the entry point to create bounce and cushion is right there. We dont even need clips but like I know for a fact that kato and moyo are meant to go on a date soon and its like off what?? how can you go on a date with someone you have never spoken too. What is this middle school? I have been told ep3/ep4 develops them but if developing kato and moyo is them simply going on a date after never having even spoken then wtfock?!?!?!? (literally). Like wtfock wake up use your text format get moyo to send her some text being like “we good” and start the connection like R&S. Also if they go on a date without kato explaining why she backed up or what kato said to moyo (because if it was literally nothing this makes even less sense). So he has just been pressed cuz of rejection? I mean I guess. So I have a theory about this order. Did you notice the last clip most likely had a product placement for a gum company(cant verify this but it sure seemed so). I think they are reworking clips for sponsors. So I know the extras just had some info go out about some dates and I legit think wtfock is swaying side to side because they need to make sure certain sponsors are in certain episodes. Also I have been hearing rumors and confirmation via extras for additional film dates and such I def think something is happening in production. Also how short was this episode? I guess thats good since not much happened. Noa is great but I feel bad he has portray such poorly paced narrative. We love you Noa!

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tcdstxne · 4 years

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{ douglas booth, 25, cismale, he/him } hey, what’s up! i’m theo stone. i’m from westport, connecticut and everyone back at home calls me teddy. i always get told that i’m charismatic & kindhearted but the haters will say i’m hot headed & sensitive. when people think of me, they think of the beat dropping in a packed club, cracking open a cold one and saying ‘saturday’s are for the boys’ and listening to marvin’s room on a loop after a bad breakup but that’s just who i am, and like i always say “red, white and brew, baby.” { candice, 23, est, she/her }

he was born and raised in a fairly wealthy family in westport, connecticut. being the stone’s only child, teddy was put on a pedestal from the time he was born.

he was a star student, a stellar athlete and an all around good guy. he loved football and taking the boat out on the lake for the weekend with his friends - a true all american boy.

his father, a successful lawyer wanted teddy to follow in his footsteps and take over the family’s firm one day. he even got into law school on a scholarship because of who his dad was. but, being away from home for the first time and not having his parents breathing down his neck gave him his first sense of freedom.

and with that freedom, he joined a frat, partied hard, drank, did drugs, slept around and put all his energy in having a good time. a good time that ended up being reflected in his dwindling grades and eventually, ended up getting kicked out of college for throwing a party where someone overdosed.

his parents completely disappointed in him, teddy decided to turn lemons into lemonade. he loved partying so he decided to make that his career. he started off djing at local clubs and eventually, the east coast and soon, it was all over the world. from parties in new york city, to vegas and even all the way to dubai, he became one of the youngest and most successful djs in the game.

because o f his reputation, mtv reached out to him to be cast on jersey shore and of course, he jumped at the opportunity to be paid to party all summer and become more famous.

personality

legit the quintessential all american boy. loves sports and fishing and bbqing for his friends.

after being in a frat, he definitely has that frat douche persona, but teddy is a loWKEY softy. ofc, like any guy in his position he’s had plenty of meaningless hookups and one night stands, but he’s such a relationship boy and finds himself falling in love incredibly easily, even if it’s just with the idea of someone instead of who they actually are.

he’s a generally happy person, very much a pauly d personality in the sense that he loves to hype everyone up, and is always checking on people who seem a bit off. he’s also a human alarm clock and if the cabs are outside he will make sure you know, loud and cLEAR.

he’s generally super chill but every once in a while, things could set him off and when they do? *insert mike slamming his head into the concrete wall in italy*

he’s fRESH off a breakup. she was a model, he was dating her for a year and she cheated so he’s def like gonna try to be a playboy on the show as a middle finger to her but like i said, boy falls in love with any girl with a pulse tbh

#jshorehq:intros #teddy:intro

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winkyjinki · 4 years

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author asks 1-30 GO!

WHEW OK STRAP IN BUCKO (I already answered 1&29 uwu)

2. When you’re writing a new story, what is the one thing you need to know before you can start?

This is gonna sound so like “duh bitch” but I always need to know AT LEAST how I want it to end. Or like the almost-end. Bc it’s like if you know where you want to go then you can figure out how to build up to that moment.

They always say it’s not abt the destination, but the journey. But like in this case, you need to know the destination to figure out the journey oop--

3. How do you know when a scene is “done”?

This is gonna sound so vague but like... when I feel like it’s complete? Like when I think it’s served its purpose in the fic.

In theatre, every single scene has a purpose in building up to the climax & resolution, so I always try to make sure that each scene has served its purpose in moving the plot along/gives you something for a later plot point.

4. How do you know when a chapter is “done”?

Ummm... I try to end it at a good point. Honestly this is the hardest for me because I always want to end it at a good point but also where it feels like the equivalent of a half-cadence in music (it doesn’t feel complete).

That’s like my best explanation.

5. How do you know when a story is “done”?

I think my story is done when I’ve neatly wrapped up the plot to my liking while also leaving as little loose ends as possible.

This is a boring answer lmao but it’s really my best explanation.

6. Where do your titles come from?

Most of my titles come from songs that my fics remind me of. I try to make it be like ~poetic~ bc I can’t come up w titles from the pits of my brain but I can def try to find the perfect song lyric LOL

7. How do you feel about prologues?

I feel like it’s really useful for setting some background info that you want to reference but don’t actually want to explain in the main story LOL but it’s def not necessary

8. How do you feel about epilogues?

Another thing that I feel is def not necessary but sometimes you want a little “what happens next?”...as a treat

9. Do you tend to have an external narrator or use one of the characters?

I like the idea of using a limited POV, so I like to use one of the characters for narration. Bc in my opinion it’s a little much when you’re like spending so much time being ~omniscient~ but that’s just my opinion.

10. Does your narrator move from character to character?

Ummm honestly it depends for me. Like for me it’s like...if the story calls for it in my heart.

I usually like to keep it to one character unless I’m planning a more complex story that calls for a lot of different POVs!

11. What punctuation do you love too much?

Bruh... Commas, semicolons and this bitch (–) are my holy grail I feel like I’m the queen of run-on sentences.

12. What punctuation do you hate with a passion?

Okay I don’t HATE them but I really don’t like the overuse!!!!! of exclamation points!!!!!! I use them a lot when I’m just posting about stuff I’m really passionate about like that’s cute I just am not too crazy about that in like prose & creative writing. I wouldn’t say it’s a pet peeve, per se, but it’s just not my cup of tea :/

13. What grammar tends to cause problems when you’re writing?

Idek what this means but like I guess I struggle with writing verbs in the right POV bc, like I said, I'm the queen of run on sentences so I tend to lose focus on what’s the subject of the sentence.

14. What’s the one word you can never spell/use properly, no matter how hard you try?

I am actually illiterate so I always end up misspelling words ALL the time just bc like my brain will turn off. I used to use the word “futile” incorrectly all the time but once I like actually found out how to use it correctly, I’ve been pretty good :0

15. How do you write a really good metaphor?

Bro when I figure it out I will SHARE

I don’t have a strategy--sometimes I just write good ones and idek how it happened oof--

16. What is your best piece of advice for writing angst scenes?

If you are HURTING by the time you’re done with it, you did it right. When I write angst, I know it’s good if my heart hurts by the end of it LOL

17. What is your best piece of advice for writing hurt/comfort scenes?

Kinda the same as 16, like it hurts but in a better way. This will probably also be the same as my answer for 22, but if it just makes you soft, you’re doing well.

Soft & hurt is the combo you need for that.

18. What is your best piece of advice for writing comedy scenes?

I like to share these scenes with people (beta readers, friends, etc.) and see how they receive them. Even if they don’t laugh like SUPER HARD, I think it’s worth keeping if they make positive comments and they say stuff like “That’s a mood.” or “I related to that hard.” bc in my humble opinion that’s good enough for me.

I’m working on a Trashmouth comedy special series, and I literally just read the skits to my friends and see what lands and what doesn’t.

I just like to treat any comedy scene as a comedy skit. Just see what lands !

19. What is your best piece of advice for writing action scenes?

Oh man, I don’t do a lot of those, so I don’t really have much advice for that :( maybe in like a year I’ll have something for that lollll

20. What is your best piece of advice for writing smut scenes?

Now I’m no expert on doing the dirty, but I did read up on how to write like...good sex scenes....and a lot of the sources say to (in my own words) overload on thought and emotion.

Like honestly I don’t read smut for the sex (I mean like.... I get hype when my ship gets nasty but that’s beside the point), I read it to see how someone comes undone for their lover and I think that’s IMPORTANT. Tbh anyone can write sex, but like I need that connection.

21. What is your best piece of advice for writing romance scenes?

Overload on that thought and emotion, dude. Make your heart THROB. I like to make this a matter of building tension and setting the release. Like no I will not be giving you that kiss yet bc that’s too easy. Build it up a little bit.

Talk about slow burn

22. What is your best piece of advice for writing fluff scenes?

If you read it and you feel like you might explode from how much these characters love each other, you are doing amazing, sweetie.

23. How do you balance your characters in an ensemble story?

I like to list out the primary, secondary, and side characters and figure out where they come in the story, what the relationships are, what purpose they serve the plot, stuff like that.

In a theatre standpoint (obviously), any character in a play has their own purpose and without even one of them, you can’t wrap that story up neatly. Like in Ancient Greek plays, even the smallest part played an integral part in moving the plot along.

24. How do you balance your characters when there are only a two or three in a story?

I like to think about what purpose each character serves in the story. I also like to think about whether this story revolves around one character, or if it delves into each character’s story and they kind of intertwine. Maybe they’re family or a team or roommates, or maybe they’re strangers whose lives are connected in some way if you wanna take that route.

I think when there are so little characters, you get more room to make them their own people. And you have that possibility of making it a collection of stories that come together without making it so confusing.

I think about that in, like, a theatre standpoint obviously.

25. How do you create an original character?

AAA I’ve never really made an OC but honestly I like to think it’s like making a sim LOL I’m so sorry to EVERYONE who’s ever made an OC.

I don’t even remember was my OC building process was like when I wrote original stories in, like, middle school.

26. How do you go about world building?

Oof ok I’ve been writing fanfic for as long as I can remember so that’s kinda cheating a little bit LOL it’s self explanatory.

But in the few original stories I’ve written (and honestly even when I write for some AUs), I base a lot of things on my own reality. So like people I know, places I like to go to, events that have taken place in my lifetime, they’re like the template, and depending on the nature of this world (realistic, fantasy, modern, futuristic, etc), that’s like how I’ll mold it to be part of that world.

27. Do you try to do most of your research ahead of writing (when research is necessary) or do you do it as things come up?

Honestly, I research things as they come up because things are always gonna come up. I’m constantly coming up with little things I can add into my fics, and I like to try all my ideas to see if they work with the story. I don’t want to scrap an idea just bc it’s not in my archive of research.

I also think when you get too wrapped up in technicalities, you lose focus of the actual story, so I like to jump in and do all my fact-checking as I go along!

28. How do you make sure your plot points are there while also making them blend in with the story?

This is something that I’m still figuring out because I’m just now getting back into writing longer fics, but I think as long as you make them fit in a way that they serve the plot or they play into one of your characters’ motives then it’s a good plot point!

30. How do you edit your stories?

This is gonna sound so extra, but I rewrite ALL OF IT from the beginning. When I do this, it really helps me figure out how to write thing in a more efficient and effective manner.

And I cannot stress this enough, beta readers are SO useful. You can do all of the proofreading you want, but someone who’s reading your writing will probably catch more spelling and grammar mistakes honestly. Also, they can give you insight on what might need more development, what might not make as much sense, and what really isn’t that necessary.

#asks #that was a LOT #LMAOOO #but honestly it was super fun answering all of these #thank you Angela for making me actually think abt my writing oof #i adore u so many #uwuuuu

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kayfabejake · 5 years

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WWF Survivor Series 1996 PPV Review

It’s that time of year! Get out your Thanksgiving leftovers, cause it’s time for the second longest and most boring special match type of the year (in my opinion, don’t hate me). The big match on this card for me is Stone Cold Steve Austin versus Bret “The Hitman” Hart, a prequel to their legendary double turn match at WrestleMania 13. Let’s get watching and let’s get reviewing!

Date: 11.17.1996 / Venue: Madison Square Garden - New York, NY / Attendance: 18647 / Tagline: Back To Attack

Survivor Series Elimination Match Henry Godwinn & Phineas Godwinn “The Godwinns” w/ Hillbilly Jim, Doug Furnas, and Phillip LaFon def. Leif Cassidy & Marty Jannetty “The New Rockers”, Owen Hart & The British Bulldog w/ Clarence Mason in (20:41)

The level of talent in this match is so wildly inconsistent it’s hilarious

“Phineas is gonna attempt a suplex! How stupid is that!” Good point JR

Henry Godwinn eliminates Jannetty with the “Slop Drop”, Owen Hart eliminates Henry with a spinning back kick, Bulldog then eliminates Phineas Godwinn. Good that we got the Godwinns out jesus christ

Furnas hits a vicious powerslam on Cassidy

Owen Hart with a very high dropkick

The heels are working over Doug Furnas in the corner

Bulldog hits the delayed vertical suplex on Furnas and then flips just to showboat

Vicious gutbuster onto Furnas, JR calls it a “Suzanne Somers” gutbuster lol

LaFon eliminates Cassidy

Owen Hart’s belly to belly suplexes are a thing of beauty

LaFon pins Bulldog, who retaliates with an illegal chop block

Hart comes in to work on LaFon’s legs by smashing them against the ringpost

Hart applies the sharpshooter but Furnas breaks it up

Hart catches the leg of LaFon and LAFON HITS A STEP UP REVERSE ENZIGURI

Furnas gets the hot tag, suplexes Hart and picks up the win for the faces!

My Rating [2.75*] / Daddy Meltzer’s Rating [3.25*]

The Undertaker pins Mankind w/ Paul Bearer in (14:52)

Bearer goes into a shark cage lmao

TAKER COMES DOWN FROM THE CEILING LIKE A BAT LOL

Brawling in the ring, then on the outside

The Undertaker bites the mandible claw hand!

Catches the mandible claw and stands up into some chops!

Mankind takes a huuuuuge bump holy shit

Undertaker wins with a tombstone!

My Rating [3*] / Daddy Meltzer’s Rating [2.25*]

Survivor Series Elimination Match “The Stalker” Barry Wyndham, “The Wildman” Marc Mero w/ Sable, Jake “The Snake” Roberts, & Rocky Maivia def. Goldust, Jerry “The King” Lawler, Crush, & Hunter Hurst Helmsley in (23:44)

This match is a real “shape of things to come” match, wow. The Rock’s first PPV match and HHH coming into the match with the Intercontinental Belt.

Lots of in and out heel work

The Rock fights King for a while and holy shit, Rock has already got the facial expressions and the super selling down pat

Trips and Rocky lock up

Suplex by HHH into an elbow drop by Goldust

Crush hits a backbreaker on The Rock

Sunny, on commentary, accuses Vince of wearing a toupee

Vince sweeps it under the rug verrrrry quickly 🤔

Heels work over Rocky for a while, hot tag to Roberts who cleans house

Lawler is eliminated by Roberts

Mero hits HHH with a standing headscissors, a back body drop, then after a quick break the Merosault takes out Trips

Mero and Jake The Snake are quickly eliminated, Mero sort of off screen

Rocky is alone, facing Crush & Goldust. The crowd already loves him

Crossbody onto both Crush and Goldust

Rocky pins Crush! Rock against Goldust!

BRUTAL SHOULDER BREAKE TO GOLDUST FOR THE WIN AND THE CROWD ERUPTS

My Rating [3*] / Daddy Meltzer’s Rating [2*]

Bret “The Hitman” Hart pins Stone Cold Steve Austin in (28:36)

Holy fucking shit. The prequel to Austin v. Hart at WM13. I’m so excited to watch this, and even more excited to see Austin v. Hart II.

The Hitman versus The Rattlesnake. Let’s fucking go.

There’s this look on Austin’s face as he sizes up Bret, before the jabbering and the bantering. Begrudging respect gives way to anger and a burning desire to win.

Austin working over Hart’s arm in the middle of the ring, but his knowledge of holds and human body geometry allows him to escape and put Austin into a disadvantageous position

Hart driving knees into Austin’s back

Amazing drop toe hold by Austin as Hart bounces off the ropes, but then Hart turns it into an amazing hold on Stone Cold

Austin throws Bret into the ropes, and then works him over with falling elbows and stomps

Stone Cold is continually targeting Hart’s neck and lungs

Hart and Austin trading intense blows

Reversal irish whip into a clothesline into an inverted atomic drop by Hart

Hart thrown to the outside

Hart drives Austin through the barricade and they’re brawling in the crowd

Austin is planted face first into the steel guard rail

Stone Cold rolls all the way out of the ring when he gets put back in lol

Austin catapults Hart into the Spanish desk and they get into a messy brawl on that table

JR sagely observes: “It seems like it always happens to the Spanish guys!”

Austin drops an elbow onto Hart from the apron

Vertical suplex on Hart by Austin OVER THE ROPES, DAMN

A slugfest in the middle of the ring as Hart gives it his all, holy shit

Backbreaker on Austin

Hart goes up to the top rope, and Austin goes up to the top too AND HITS A TOP ROPE SUPLEX HOLY SHIT

Bret attempts to get a sneaky pin but fails

Stone Cold Stunner buys him a two count but no more!

Austin pummeling away at Hart but hart will not give in!!!

Submission applied by Austin, but Hart manages to crawl to the ropes for a break

Bret Hart is IRISH WHIPPED INTO THE FUCKING RING POST, SLIDING INTO IT ON HIS SIDE OUCH

But Hart kicks out, again. Incredible.

HART TURNS THE BOW AND ARROW SUBMISSION INTO A SHARPSHOOTER--NO, HE PUMMELS AWAY AT AUSTIN’S FACE INSTEAD!

Just a mindblowing finish as Hart, in the middle of a sleeper hold from Austin, kicks off the second turnbuckle and backflips both himself and Austin into a pin. The Hitman wins. What a match, an absolute classic.

My Rating [4.5*] / Daddy Meltzer’s Rating [4.5*]

Survivor Series Elimination Match Farooq, Razor Ramon II, Diesel II & Vader (DDQ) Yokozuna, Savio Vega, Flash Funk, & Jimmy Snuka in (09:48)

Hell yes, Cornette is on commentary. Even if this match sucks I’m going to enjoy it.

JR takes a shot at Hulk Hogan -- “I’ve never seen red and yellow look so good in the Garden” (re: Flash’s outfit)

“You couldn’t manage a Wendy’s!” shouts Cornette at JR. “I could if you lived in town,” retorts JR 😂

Diesel II hits a brutal clothesline on Flash Funk

Diesel II eliminates Savio Vega

Snuka eliminates Razor Ramon II and then a bunch of chairs are brought into the ring and an all out brawl breaks out, leading to...a double DQ. Ok, um...what?

My Rating [.5*] / Daddy Meltzer’s Rating [1*]

WWF Heavyweight Title Match Sycho Sid pins Shawn Michaels [c] w/ Jose Lothario in (20:02)

I’m not really sure if I find Michaels hot or I just am really buying into the character and the screams of the audience.

Bret Hart gets the winner of this match for a title shpt, which, knowing about the Michaels/Hart timeline, implies that Sid’s going to win this. but we’ll see

things we know about Michaels coming into this match

he thinks he’s cute

he knows he’s sexy

he’s got the looks that drive the girls wild

he’s got the moves that really move ‘em

he sends chills up and down their spines

big punch from Sid to Michaels in the corner

awesome baseball slide between Sid’s legs into a dropkick from Michaels

chop block by Michaels on Sid and, surprisingly to me, he gets booed!

Michaels uses the ropes to get up high and drop down on Sid’s leg

Michaels in the corner, Sid “sprints” at him and comes in so goddamn slowly it’s hilarious

throughout the match Michaels is working on Sid’s left leg and knee, and continues to get heat from the crowd for doing so

Michaels clotheslined over the top

RIDICULOUS rotation on a back body drop by Sid

backbreaker by Sid gets a two count

huge punch to HBK who is out on his feet in the middle of the ring (in kayfabe)

BUT MICHAELS FIGHTS BACK!

MICHAELS JUMPS UP INTO THE AIR FOR A DOUBLE AXE HANDLE BUT SID PUTS UP HIS FOOT AND MICHAELS BOUNCES OFF, GOING VERTICAL STRAIGHT UP IN THE AIR WHILE ON HIS HEAD FOR A BIT LMAO

Michaels kicks out back to back times

Sid catches the Sweet Chin Music and reverses it into a one armed chokeslam

Sid sets up the powerbomb, but Michaels reverses it into a small package pin attempt

Michaels kips up but gets immediately clotheslined by Sid

Sid grabs the camera and hits Jose with it, and the ref CLEARLY SEES IT AND DOES NOT DQ HIM IMMEDIATELY WHAT THE FUCK

Michaels goes out to attend to Lothario, but Sid throws him back into the ring

Michaels bumps the ref, which means...here we go

Sid smashes the camera onto his back

Sid hits the powerbomb. 1-2-3. Even with a slow count from Hebner, Sid gets it. I have to say, I don’t usually like Sycho Sid, but this was a decent match.

My Rating [2.75*] / Daddy Meltzer’s Rating [3.75*]

Overall PPV Rating: B

A decent show with only one bad match. I do have to say there’s one too many Survivor Series matches on this show, and it ended in a DQ anyways--so what was the point? Sycho Sid vs. Shawn Michaels was decent and a believable way for Shawn to drop the belt, and Hart vs. Austin was a fucking KAH-LASSIC that gets me even more hyped for their incoming WM13 showdown.

#wwf #survivor series #1996 #stone cold steve austin #bret hart #shawn michaels

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lil-miss-methodical · 6 years

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Black Panther Review Articles 3

May contain spoilers

“Just because something works, doesn’t mean it can’t be improved.”

Shuri: Young, vibrant and intelligent -> the Carefree One Shuri is easily a favorite. Every character had a part to play and Shuri’s the one of untampered youth. She wasn’t naive, or even childish. Know the world, it’s history and being responsible for the technological aspects of her people’s livelihood kinda pushes those concepts away. But her brother has been able to keep her shelter from danger, from the harshness of life as much as possible and so while she has great capabilities and task she remains this breath of freshness. She’s a jokester, choosing her brother as her victim whenever possible. It’s her easy excitable nature that makes her so enjoyable- she just as intelligent if not more so than Tony Stark but has nothing of his flaws of grandeur. Her skills are amazing and she knows it but she never comes with a vibe of I’m better than you because I’m more intelligent. In fact get her to talking about her tech and she because more alive. In the film she’s allowed this carefree vibe that allows the production to present black youth as it is in social standings - you get amazing lines from her like the ‘what are those’ throwback.

“I am loyal to the throne, no matter who sits on it.”

Okoye: Controlled, powerful and responsible -> the Resilient One A lot of people claim to hate the strong black woman trope - toting dangers to nature forgetting that that trope actually was born from the many women who had to become resilient to their circumstances. The danger is not a strong black woman but the world that expects her to only just. Okoye is defined as strong not because she’s capable of maintaining her own in battle, but because she’s of conviction. She vows to do and so she does. Strength is sometimes simply being and or doing even when you don’t want to. A woman can be strong without being a stone wall of impenetrableness and the film never intended to write her as such. Easily on we’re introduced to her other sides, the teasing side, the side that considers her King a friend despite the boundaries that would normal eliminate such feelings. The soft edges of love. Although you bet your ass I’m here for the concept of her standing for her values no matter what and man literally dropping to his knees before her in repentance.

“It was my duty to fight for what I love.”

Nakia: Stubborn, determined and self confident -> the Willful one Nakia was everything weak people complain about (def men) - stubborn, opinionated, knowing of her own worth, determined and focused on her own desires and goals. These traits that black women are often faulted for having were not at all considered bad in Nakia. In fact they were her strengths and the exact thing that saved not only T'Challa but Wakanda itself. She the so call elusive woman, unpredictable and free but they don’t pull a pin up on her. They don’t make her overly sexual or seductive. They don’t overwhelm her presence with feminine whiles. She’s not there to be served on a platter to the Black Panther. Instead their chemistry is genuine. Old relations where the flame hasn’t died. She’s his confidant and his voice of reasons many times.

The ladies of Wakanda are beautiful and important because they are the reason Wakanda stands. Through the intelligence of technology, the strength of presence and the nature of determination. It’s Shuri’s creative mind that Wakanda’s foundation resides upon - the same technology they all depend on even in battle. Okoye leads the Dora in protection of the throne, its her single audacity to stand for that throne despite her own heart that stops the battle on the field. Nakia is a spy that has to adapt to every situation she’s placed in - and we see that strength constantly. It’s Nakia’s voice of reason that brings the white guy back that later stopped all their weapons from leaving. It’s her sense of right and determination that gets Shuri and the Queen from the hall - Erik would’ve killed them just because their loyalty is to T'Challa. It’s Nakia’s daring nature that puts T'Challa back in the power of the Black Panther. Wakanda would not still be standing as is without these brave women.

The film doesn’t tell you that these women are outstanding…they show you.

People say the women stole the show but that’s because they don’t understand the women were the show. T'Challa may be the King but they weren’t afraid to represent everyone else. They weren’t afraid to shine on those around him. I think people should understand this push of - all our people are important. The writers intention of show all sides of black people as we’ve never been shown. They showed you who all the characters were - that’s rare. Only the main leads get that treatment in most projects. But we know for us - black Panther was a chance to here about us and they took that opportunity. These black women - the carefree, the resilient, willful ones - they’re often bad mouth in real life, people ability to see only their flaws knows no bounds and yet the movie presents you with only their best.

These women were different from one another, they all surround the King for one reason or another but none stand within his shadow. They’re their own people and bring their own skills to the table.

Fashion and other important elements when it comes to women: The fashion was so on point with these ladies and it was not about the greedy eyes of men, it was not about the female form being sexualized. These women were not here to be anyone’s eye candy. They were beautiful just because they were. One of my favorite moments is in the beginning when Okoye tells T'Challa not to freeze when he sees Nakia and you automatically expect her to be decked out looking made up but when we actually get the first shot of her she’s in regular garb and has a head wrap on and yet T'Challa is still floored. It was a nice way to lead with the messgae that a black woman in her normal state is still beautiful. We were all pleased that they cast a dark skinned woman in such a role. They let her hair out and kept her in the wear. The clothing of the female guards are not fleshy and pretentious - in fact - when they tell Nakia to put on the outfit the words that were used was - its armor.

Danai is someone we’ve seen in this kind of role. Her work in The Walking Dead has exposed us all to seeing her in this kind of form - but, the difference with Black Panther is we get to celebrate her type of beauty. You have these women who walk around bald and they’re proud of it, they prefer it. I’ve said once that all women should cut their hair off at least once - because the experience of walking around in a world they thinks they get to decide what your hair should be and taking that away from them in every aspect is a powerful thing and has the ability to shoot your confidence sky high (trust I’ve done it twice). There’s nothing wrong with a woman without hair. She was more beautiful when she took off the wig and threw it at her opponent. We get to see Danai in this gorgeous flowing red dress that just looks like vengeance as she jumps from the upper floor.

My favorite wear came from Shuri though! Such diversity in her wear and yet none overly topping who her character was supposed to be. She rocked the braids but they showed just how fucking changeable that hair is. She rocked the solo bun, the double buns, the half up ponytail, the cropped back with the design - and it was a nice one too! She had the all white with the dress and sneaks, the belly design top, and then she had the nerve to be all decked out for battle! Y'all know she had that already prepped on the low rih? She just knew they were gonna need her on the battle field on day. She had her own weapons prepped and with accessories. It’s difficult to come better than Shuri - she was smart, funny, brave, and a fashionista all in her own right.

The film didn’t balk on showing these women’s greatness while not using it as a peepshow.

Woman can be deadly in anything. They can be gorgeous in any state. And more importantly they hold the autonomy to their own being.

Casting:

I love this whole cast - I’ve said it since the casting list was released. Letitia Wright was a new face for me. I’ve only seen her in one other production and that was Black Mirror - and I was super hyped afterwards because she is so phenomenal. She def the breakout queen, the love people have for her after Shuri will hopefully propel her career because she’s got it. seeing her and Chadwick play ff one another as siblings was one of the best elements to the entire movie. Shuri is one of the best things in the entire movie if we’re to be frank. She meshed into this character, slid into them shoes as though they were her own.

It has def felt like Lupita has been killing the game recently and she deserves it. She just brings so much light and fun with her. I think a lot of us look up to her confidence and her nature to not back down in this world thats hardly ready for a woman like her. I felt like she had been waiting to play this role. Like I said before - its imperative for women like her to be presented with roles such as these. Its only then that you can see theres no difference and we can deliver just like everybody else.

Danai has been my love since she first walked onto the screen In The Walking Dead. Seeing her kickass, seeing her being emotional, seeing her being so predominate in fandom was just exciting. So when I heard she was getting cast for this I was ecstatic. You cannot go wrong with this woman. I feel like she does so well because even with cast mates its not a competition for her, its not about outshining or outdoing. She just has this presence and she brings that to her characters.

I’m happy they went with these women. If they make a part 2 I demand they bring them all back!

#black panther #women of wakanda #shuri #nakia #okoye #letitia wright #lupita nyong'o #danai gurira #reviews #black panther review articles #part 3 #movies #spoilers #marvel

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ts-hvv4 · 4 years

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EPISODE ONE: “GAMERS NEVER STOP GAMING” - SHARIFA

As castaways got to know each other, or catch up with old cast mates, the inactivity of others set the wheels in motion for a vote off.

WOW! Season 93 holy cow. This season has started out to be anything but normal. Within my tribe, I’ve played with 5/9 members previously - which is not what I expected. I’m extremely nervous about Ricky and Emma because based off our calls and chats, they’re worried about past drama from Easter island and other ORGs being a factor in our relationships. I’m trying to let go of everything but they seem to disagree. I’ll make a more in depth review of my tribe at a later time!

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Ok, so so far I've spoken with a few people. Birch, Keegan, Cheatham, Olivia, Ned, Kurt and Trent. I'm feeling Kurt and Trent so far, Kurt I found out through him we've know each other from possibly an old mini or something, and Trent we have the same interests. So far so good. I know Chris, we had a great bond back in the day but it doesn't mean we will here. Me and Emma used to talk but I saw she recently unfriended me so...and Sarah I love her, Andreas I hope is the same Andreas because I miss him. Matt I lowkey want to meet because distance wise he's the closest to me, so we could maybe bond about similar areas and such, and he seems cool. I may have more to same later but this is how I feel right now!

I cannot believe I was uber nervous last night! I have no clue why either, guess it was because it was a lot at one time and like seeing others say it was a super strong cast was a lot. Given I just got into this community like a month ago I think I was able to see my biggest obstacle will be getting to somehow squeeze in and be comfortable since I am like extremely shy ahhhhhh

* a little while lateR*

A lot of my tribe seemed really cool! Dennis I feel the closest to already and then Andreas was so nice to keep me informed on things. Matt is also like the bombdiggity, Sarah is a sassy omelette, Kage is like the second coming of Shaggy Rogers, Ricky/Niklas I look forward to talking to more and the others I hope to talk to some more but because I woke up 10 minutes ago my memory sucks

WHY TF IS MATT SUMMERS HERE NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO Anyways I like everyone on my tribe. Birch is once again making friendship bracelets (they never sent out the ones they made in tashirojima lmao) and everyone is so enamored and I’m just like yep mhm. I’m getting along well with Ned, Keegan, and Kurt. Sharifa and I finally have a good dialogue going this morning and I really like her but she’s won like twice and I know trent has her high on his kill list for that. Malik and I finally talked today more which was nice. Cheatham seems cheeky and we talked a little bit not much and I’m really dropping the ball with Jake I feel bad like I def need to talk to him but agh it’s so hard trying to keep up with nine people lmao. It’s like birch and I are just going through the motions like we don’t even know what to say really other than hi how’re you I’m good thanks bc of all we went through in the game we just played. I wish I could vote them out so I wouldn’t have to deal with all those emotions. Also I’m very distressed about matt summers being here he probably doesn’t even remember me but oh sweet jesus GC was so horrible for me and I don’t hate him or anything but he double idoled me out like why tf did he have to be here 😭😭

Malik is not a lotr fan rip him

Alright, I've had some time to sleep on this game and I have some early thoughts. I think yesterday I put my guard up to soon. This season I am going to be more cool, calm, and collected then I have in previous seasons. I know I have a past with some people, who I really don't trust. I think it would be stupid for my narrative to be based around drama that occurred 5 years ago when I was 17, so I am going to be the bigger person here and hope other people aren't.

Last night a couple people jumped on call. This included Kage, Matt, Sarah, Emma, Chris, Ricky, and I. The call brought me right back to 2015 - it was wild. We kind of had a little chat about our past games. Anyways, then Ricky out of the blue brings up my FTC in Easter Island - a season which had so much tension. There were two sides - My Alliance and Ricky's alliance. Ricky's alliance pretty much maintained control of the game the entire game, and seventeen year-old Andreas was salty about it. I thought it was interesting he did that..... it concerns me he may still be mad at me for things that happened five years ago.

*Andreas walks away from the camera, does a big sigh and plops himself back down on the rock*

Time for a review of my tribe:

Sarah - LOVE OF MY LIFE!!! Sarah and I go back way far in Bangladesh. We spent my entire game together where she blindsided me. Since then, we've become great friends and I even flew to Vancouver to meet her IRL. She's my #1 in this game for sure.

Kage - Eastern Canadian King! I met Kage in Great Lakes where we didn't see eye-to-eye in a game sense but got along on a personal level. The GL cast remains one of my fav casts I've ever played with and I'm excited to meet this new Kage.

Emma - Emma is a dangerous player. Every game I've ever played with her, aside from Jordan Pines, she has done me so dirty. After the last game we played, my guard is really up with her, so I am going to try to not get too wrapped in her web.

Ricky - Not sure how he feels about me, I would like to work with him because he is smarter then people give him credit for. Hopefully it all works out between us.

Chris - I like Chris. I think Chris is buttering me up though, not sure if he really wants to work with me or this is all an act. Either way, he has made it clear he has no connections and is a hero so he for sure someone I'd like to go far with :)

Matt - Matt fucking Summers (in the words of Laure LMAO). Matt is a really nice guy, but has the reputation of being very dangerous. In a weird way, I think I can kind of be the watered down Matt Summers depending on the day. I would love to work with him, because I think he's a big personality that could place me in the background of the game.

Dennis - I find speaking with Dennis so easy! Not only is he nice and personable, but easy to have a good chat with. I would like to work with Dennis if I can.

Lukas - I find chatting with Lukas a bit harder then I should, but I expect it just based off our personalities. I am really trying hard to socialize with him, so hopefully it shouldn't be terrible.

Nick - Nick is in a similar spot to Lukas for me - but I don't find it as hard to chat with him. I'm drawing from my improv expertise this season and doing a lot of 'yes and' ing to stuff. With him, that's what I've been doing in the hopes I can build a stronger relationship. So far it's working.

That's all for now! Let's see what happens with Kage at the island thing haha

SOOO Emma is amazing. I really hope she's not good friends with anyone else in the cast cause I love her and I want her to be my #1 Jake is chill. I'm gonna keep him around for a bit, but he ALWAYS backstabs his friends so I don't trust him Chris seems cool. He's gonna be a schemer/utr I feel it. But I enjoy talking to him Matt, I'm still trying to get a feel for. He's from WV so I started talking to him about Noah Salvatore and somehow they went to the same school together so he clearly has bad luck. Dennis and I have been getting along. I talked to him a lot about my game last time tho. That made me realize I need to keep my friendships with Jake and Emma on the LOW. Kage is messy. Even this morning he's still talking to me like this: it’s terrivle nothing bere i haven't really talked to anyone else yet. Ricky and Kage both just seem so hard to talk to one on one.

Hi!! so I am the first one on my tribe to go to Ancient Thera. Kage came from the other tribe and HE IS NOVA SCOTIAN!!!!!!!! F2 right there!!! I am so hyped that I met him!!! he lives an hour from me!!!! AHHHHHHH!! I also betrayed him already and went for tribal advantage instead of personal as we agreed. also, the chances of me and him are so high I'm actually so excited!!. I can Picture me and hm becoming good friends, he and I have a lot in common. this tribe is also amazing!!

Oh god I’ve never played this challenge and I’ve always felt bad for those who did fuck

First Confessional! It's been about a day since the season began and this tribe is rockin'! I've had some pretty great conversations with most of the tribe. However there have been a couple people lacking in the social department. Most notably is NED, who I've apparently played with before but I can barely remember him. I guess he's just been busy all day, and it's only been a day so I'm not holding it against him much. SHARIFA has not been the most social with me but we have discussed some New Years resolutions and how poorly we do with those. Aside from that, I really like BIRCH, MALIK and KURT. I think they're top notch people so far and I'm hoping I can plod on forward and actually form an alliance of sorts with them. My biggest struggle right now is trying to decide whether I want to initiate any game talk this early, or if I should just hold out for a little longer so I don't come across like I'm playing too hard right out of the gates.

How does one turn a convo from fun and friendly to strategic without just straight up being like “how do you feel about everybody” bc that’s such a loaded question but the easiest route to what you wanna talk about lmao. TLDR I’m trying to talk to Kurt strategically and I’ve typed and deleted a message about a million times. Ned and I bonded super well we called for a minute and I feel so bad bc he’s like “I get close to one person and we’re together to the end I’m super loyal” and I’m like ME TOO NORMALLY BUT I ALREADY HAVE LUKAS AND TRENT and like I already love Ned I wanna be his friend and I know he trusts me super well already so that’s good I’m just worried for if/when he finds out I already have a tight twosome ahdjsks. But that’s way ahead I needn’t worry rn. I want a four person alliance with Kurt, Ned, Trent and myself. Ned said he liked Kurt and Trent so that’s great and Trent is obviously down so I just gotta grow a pair and talk to Kurt. I also really like Kellogg (can’t remember his real name ever but it’s similar to Kellogg; I’m such an ass) and Sharifa too she’s super cool. She’s won twice so I’m a littler nervy but I like her a lot. I talked with Jake a little bit more but still not much and cheatham I think I ignored all day yikes. Birch is beloved in the eyes of the tribe rn but hehe I’m still not buying into it sorry!! I like them a lot outside of the game but I’ll never ever trust them in a game. I was talking with Ned and he said he hasn’t connected well with them and wouldn’t mind voting them out so woo. It’s gonna be tricky to try and get that to have any traction since she just did something generous for the tribe sigh. Gonna have to be patient like I was patient with someone else in Mykonos. I can be patient, certainly.

I FORGOT MALIK he’s so kind I like him a lot but he’s not as giving in a convo as others so I feel like I don’t know him as well but we’re developing that relationship

I just really like our tribe

*a little while later*

Malik is so sweet, I think he needs an emoji tutorial tho 😂 sometimes he’ll send an emoji and I’m a little perplexed why he chose that one but it’s all very endearing

So Kage and his Thera shit... SHADYYY. He said if they won the challenge they get themselves an advantage in the game but if they lose, the TRIBE gets a disadvantage in the immunity. He specified the tribe and the immunity thing. But didn't specify that winning the comp would give the TRIBE an advantage. But here we are. Birch's tribe got an advantage and we got a disadvantage. I. Call. Bullshit. I think Kage got an advantage in the game in exchange for a disadvantage and it just trying to keep it secret. I'm honestly gonna keep pushing this theory so other people wanna vote Kage later. I asked Kage questions about the challenge and... Me, A psychology major: "He's giving a LOT of details here. Liars tend to do that" Also me, a psychology major: "Okay but these details sound right. That's a lot to make up" There's been a few people that I feel like I haven't been able to strike good convos with yet I'd put my ranking like this Emma > Chris > Dennis > Andreas >>>>> Kage/Lukas/Matt > Sarah > Ricky. But that big gap feels like a disconnect. AND I haven't fully talked to Emma because she keeps getting distracted when I try to chat with her. I'm just banking on our connection before the game I do feel really good about Chris and Dennis and I think Andreas was trying to talk game with me today. So we'll see. It could be a decent group that gets formed. But I'm sure those 3 are being super social with everyone else so idk where that puts me Post Tribal Reaction: "Advantages were for the taking. Kage gave me way too much power over his tribe and the advantages so I snaked him" - Birch I'm trying to sus out what that's insinuating cause it SOUNDS like you could just take advantages. Smh at Kage

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I already knew trent was like my dude but HE LOVES LES MIS TOO

Yesterday’s word of the day: hedgehog Today’s word of the day: morning morning morning

So this game started at a very inopportune time. I have an exam in 2 hours and another one tomorrow, so I haven't been super active in the tribe chat-- but after realizing that, I've decided to use it as a strategy. I'm not going to talk much in the tribe chat, but I'll have individual conversations with people. That way, it seems like I'm very invested in each individual relationship but am not super connected with the rest of the tribe, so people will hopefully see me as a trustworthy ally! I've connected really well with Olivia and we seem to be on the same page-- we're loyal to our ride-or-dies and hate drama. We called and I think this is an alliance to watch. I was also aligned with Jake in Crossroads, my most recent TS season, so I think he's going to be a built-in ally. Apart from them, Trent and Kurt seem cool and I won't be sad if anyone else gets voted out. Most of my conversations with other people have been very surface level, but I think that's fine since it's only day 2. On the other tribe, there's Sarah and Andreas-- in every game I've played with Sarah, we have never lied to each other once. She's been my closest ally out of every ORG I've played, so I know 100% that if we're able to link up we'll run the show. After Bangladesh, I got close with both Sarah and Andreas, so I'm feeling pretty confident about a swap.

Okay hi, first time playing a TS in a year weeeeeee!! The only person I know on this tribe is Ned S. and we haven't talked in 2 and a half years so GREAT good tribe lineup for me. However he really wants to work with me and I do too so hopefully there's some leverage there. Tbh I haven't connected with anyone on this tribe yet, every convo is like pretty surface level so im like dsjnsfnfjsd i need people that I can turn up with. I wanna turn up w Nicklas and Sara but theyre on the other tribe so this is rigged and of course we lost first... i always lose first.... idek who to vote out cus no one is inactive this is so fun for me goodbye

We lost the challenge, and I’m sad about that. Then I’m told by Keegan that there’s talk of a group with me, Sharifa, Olivia, Keegan, and Trent. How do I feel about that? Good except for the fact I feel it confirms the suspicions of Trent and Olivia talking either, and the fact that Kurt and Jake aren’t involved. So me and Kurt said we’d tell each other everything that’s going on, so I feel I do need to tell him about this alliance, but I can’t have him asking people about it or people might know I told Kurt through Sharifa if she thinks I actually did that. So now I need to let him know, and I need to keep him safe. I’m glad to be in a group I just need to protect Kurt at all costs.

Well we lost the first challenge and boy does that suck. I was really hoping we could pull out a few wins at the start of the game and have no issues moving forward. But that didn't happen and now we have to go to tribal council. Yuck! Right off the bat after losing the challenge I went in and did something I've never done before and never been comfortable doing before. And that's building an alliance. I sat for a few moments (and that's really all it was) before I jumped right into some conversations. Those first few minutes consisted of OLIVIA, TRENT, SHARIFA and MALIK. And now we have the MCDONALDS GANG. It's currently only a group of five but that's most likely all we'll need. It should be easy enough for us to wrangle in one or two people to vote out whoever we want to get out. I'm so proud of myself for really jumping right in there and getting things done. OLIVIA was the biggest factor in that. We immediately decided on who we liked (SHARIFA and TRENT) and pulled in MALIK for being a great dude. I'm really trying my hardest to step outside my comfort zone and get shit done this time around. As of right now (only a few hours after the challenge) my first choice for a target would be NED, solely because he's been the least talkative to me out of everyone. But that doesn't mean he's an easy choice. Everyone on Ammonia tribe is so great. We've still got a full day to decide who we want to target and get out. If it's not NED, perhaps JAKE might be the next best option. However, now that I've got this group together, I'm not going to be too pushy. We'll decide things as a group moving forward until later on in the game. I don't want to overplay too hard and I don't really want to be seen as the ring leader of the group.

I’d like to pat myself on the back because I was about to make a joke about how Sophie had to pretend to be religious in her game and how hard that must’ve been but then I remembered Ned is religious and I managed to hold back!!! Not making bad jokes upgrade woo

Well, this game is already not what i expected. I wasn't expecting mixed tribes, i wasn't expecting so many old schoolers, and i wasn't expecting everybody to be so nice. So far i'm just trying to be super social with everyone. My biggest fault in Indonesia is that none of the jury felt like they truly knew me. So i'm trying to be more open and more personal. and so far i think it's working. At first i really didn't want to work with Sharifa. Just looking at her stats I can see how dangerous she is. But we've really bonded over the past few days and shes one of my closest friends in this game right now. Her and Olivia are the ones I trust the most. I could be a fool and falling right into her trap, but we will see. I know Sharifa will be a huge target if we all make it to merge together so she's good to keep around as a shield for right now, but eventually I'm not going to be able to work with her any longer, but I dont know when that day will be. I am now in an alliance with Sharifa, Olivia, Keega, and Malik. We all seem to be on the same page for the first vote. Ned and Cheatham have been a lot less active than the first so one of them will be the first boot. I hate that it's probably Cheatham because I really did want to work and play this game with him. But if he's not going to put forth an effort then theres no way I'm going to risk my neck saving him. I just have to find the right way to tell him it's him. because if he hears it from someone other than me he might have a messy exit. Just need to get through this first vote and then the 5 of us will have a majority and should be ok until a swap. I've also been added to a smaller alliance of Olivia and Ned. I haven't really had a chance to talk with Ned but Olivia says he's great and that we will get along great. And i trust Olivia's judgement. But at this point Ned is just an extra vote to use because I'm not going to risk my game to try to save a player I barely know.

I think this game is off to a great start! Our tribe won immunity which was great, it allows me more time to build stronger relationships within the tribe. Some key things I wanna note: Matt expresses about how he wants to work together and I was like ‘yeah sure’ but he also messaged Sarah a much more genuine message about how he trusts her and I think that’s SUS ... I trust him for now but who knows . Ricky wants to work with me this game ?? Idk if he’s lying but I’m giving him the benefit of the doubt and I will believe him because we do a good rapore so it makes sense to work with him. He continues to say I’m the the only one he 100% trusts at this moment and i want to believe he’s not buttering me up and he’s loyal. I’ve been having meaningful discussions with everyone else. Emma is on my radar because she doesn’t want to talk to me unless it game talk and normally that’s what she does when she doesn’t really want to work with me... honestly would prefer her to go first but she seems well connected based off prior connections so that’s that. I’m not telling anyone but Sarah about how I feel about Emma truly because I can’t have her sniffing me out ... and plus loose lips sink ships. I’ve also been lying to a lot of people in this game for the purpose of appearing more personable to them... LOL.... like Lukas asked me about my thoughts on normani’s new music video and switch games and I lied through my teeth and looked stuff up to have shit to talk about. I wanna form strong connections now so people feel allegiance to me later. Hopefully we can go to tribal soon so I can test these loyalties ... anyways that’s all for now xoxo

Tribal day and I’ve found myself stumbling into yet another alliance, this time with BIRCH and MALIK. We’re just waiting for MALIK to get online but it’s a pretty sure thing that this alliance is happening. That means MALIK and I are both in the two same alliances which covers 6 of the people in the game. Unfortunately that means JAKE, NED and KURT are (at least to my knowledge) not in any major alliances. It’s certainly possible they have something going on with other people so I’m not going to rule it out entirely. I know it’s super early in the game but I’m feeling like I’ve found a good solid footing.

Hi im on the villains tribe...shocker Andreas is my #1 and when ned and I get on a tribe i will get him to be my number #1 and i know jake will want to work with me and matt summers wants to be close too so im thinking im good I dont trust emma or anyone else

Dusty

okay, we have tribal tonight, YAY. I am feeling okay. right now it is between Cheatham and Ned. I might push for Ned to go because I really like Cheatham. How I am feeling towards the other people is as follows Olivia- just played with you, did you real dirty in that game, sorry. I want to ally with you in this game more. Keegan- I really like you! you're awesome, i feel very comfortable with you and are allied with. stan. Tea Sluts 4 Lyfe. Sharifa- Not going to lie, you scare the hell out of me. we are allied, ily. everyone else: you are really nice, not strong feelings towards anyone.

I really like Kurt I wish we had included him in the alliance :( I feel like he’d be so fun to call

It is WILLLLLLD to be back, had no idea what I was getting myself into. Coming into Heroes vs Villains 4 I had the entirely wrong perception that I would be on a tribe with all Villains. Twistos Twist, it’s mixed….but you could have told me I was on the heroes tribe because everyone is so fucking nice….DO I LOOK LIKE A HERO WHO CARES ABOUT YOUR LIFE ALKJSDF. I feel like Colton in Blood vs Water on the kumbya tribe. So here are my thoughts on the flower children of the Ammonia tribe. My one solace is Kurt. We played together before on Generations, and he was actually my number 1 before Jakey was. What happened you ask? Liana and Andrew decided Kurt’s head would look great around their necks, and I could either vote with them, or go to rocks. So to avoid a tie, I ended up voting him out...and honestly it's one of my FEW regrets I have from the game. And it’s weird because I won Generations, but I still wish I had gone to rocks for him. I’VE CERTAINLY GONE TO ROCKS FOR LESS IN CHALLENGERS VS CHAMPIONS FKLAJSDF. Needless to say, he’s my ride or die, and I hope he can put the past behind him because I’m loyal as fuck to my ride or dies, just ask L’Shei and Jakey <3. Trent is probably the second person I’m trying to talk game with. He’s a biggggg strategist, even if he wants to pretend that he’s not...your that girl I knew you were. It’s been a big strategy of mine to play a wolf in sheeps clothing. This time around I can’t, my record is intimidating and there’s no way around it. So the only way I feel I can be successful is by amassing an alliance of heavy hitters. The only problem with that, is gamers never stop gaming, and they are going to want me out at some point. So I’m working hard to invest with Trent, and to play with him, but I’m FULLY aware he wants me out. It’s WHEN he wants me out, that’s the real question. And can he benefit my game, before then??? Malik is so fucking nice, super geunine, I like him, BUT he’s playing with his dick. He has this whole showmance with Kurt and it’s like habibi...what is you doin. It’s good for my game because he’s loyal to my closest ally, but it’s also like...we’re playing a game, play it. I do think Malik is someone Kurt and I can rely on, and I really adore him. It would be nice to play with another queer poc. I just don’t know if he’s a big gamer if we’re going to be real. Birch is….SO HARD TO TALK TO. Literally today I told them I was nervous after the challenge, because my strategy didn’t work, their response? “I BET!” FLAKSDFKJASKJFASD BRUH. Despite the teeth I want to pull, trying to have a conversation with them, they are genuinely nice and I feel it’s worth investing in talking with them. The only thing I’m nervous about is their relationship to Trent. Trent talks about them as a number, so I wonder if Birch is in his back pocket, especially considering the lack of game they talk. Olivia is a RE-HEALLLLLY interesting one. She doesn’t talk much, has her own language, that I do not speak, yet the SECOND we lost the challenge, her and Keegan orchestrated this whole majority alliance. And despite her being voted out by Trent, at the final 4, they seem to be working together. I think she’s 1) a villain not a hero, and 2) playing a lot more than I initially suspected. I think she likes me, we have a “we’re the only two girls on the tribe” thing going. LISTEN I WILL USE ANYTHING I’M A VILLAIN FOR A REASON. And she was the one who I think brought me into this magical majority alliance, so I guess we have a good relationship??? Definitely keeping two eyes, and two ears on her, she’s a player. Keegan….all I know about him is I think he’s close with Olivia, and that he’s spearheaded the alliance. I barely spoke with him, but we sent music to each other so clearly I’m gaming harder than I thought FKLAJSDF. He’s a tough one to figure out, I don’t trust him, and I think he has more relationships than I initially surmised, but right now he feels good with me so let’s celebrate that.gif Ned is INCH-RESTING. Barely spoke until after the immunity, now we’re talking fairly consistently. The two names being brought up for the vote are Ned and Cheatham, but Ned is putting in work to save himself. Ned is transparent and straight the fuck up, which is so necessary to build trust. Meanwhile Trent’s over here holding his cards to his chest closer than a new born baby. I’m very interested in working with Ned down the road, he just needs to make it past this rough patch, which I’m doing everything I can to make sure he does. At first I was really turned off by Jake….HIS BIO VIDEO WAS SO FUNNY. “My last expierene was horrible, fuck tumblr survivor, BUT IM SO HAPPY TO BE BACK KISSES”. But I realized once you speak his language of “white gay” he opens up ALOT. He also has an amazing record, and that is a plus for me not a minus, it has to be considering how scary people think my record is. I’m interested to see how he’s a good player, because right now he’s been so quiet and on the chopping block. I’m keeping my options open with him, not saying I’m going to work with him, but not not saying I’m going to work with him. Finally Cheatham. He’s honestly the only person on the tribe that I don’t have a relationship with, and because of that, he’s my target. This time around I HAVE to play calmer, and as much as I want to flip things on this majority alliance consisting of Trent, Malik, Olivia, Keegan and myself, I need to use it to get past these first couple votes. What has me so paranoid, is it makes the MOST sense to take me out right now. I haven’t solidified connections, I have an intimidating record, the strategy didn’t win the challenge, and everyone finds me likable which should be a GIANT red flag. I would be who I would go after, so why aren’t they??? And then that makes me paranoid, but it would be a lot of effort to make this alliance just to make someone feel comfortable. So if the path of least resistance is sending Cheatham home, I have to fight every desire I have to cause chaos, and make sure that’s what happens, because strategically it’s the smartest thing to do. Anticipating this season having a lot of swaps, if Cheatham leaves then I have a solid relationship with everyone else going into a swap, and swaps are when I’m going to be the MOST vulnerable. That and the merge but let’s survive this vote before we even start THINKING of that.

There’s always that major fear that like everyone is lying their ass off to you and it’s actually you but I pray that ain’t true

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lysitheaioandeuropa · 7 years

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hey! let’s talk! about me!

I’m gonna bullet list in hopes to keep this concise (UPDATE THIS SHIT IS A LOT LONGER THAN I THOUGHT IT WOULD BE AND I THINK I WILL BE MAKING SEPARATE POSTS), bc i know it definitely isn’t going to be very organized. Before i had my fucking mental breakdown this afternoon, i actually had a lot of thoughts this morning. Some good, some bad, but i felt like i was taking the time to really acknowledge and process some things that.. I don’t get to acknowledge and process often. Or that i just flat out refuse to, or i choose to repress memories, or am still struggling with “wait, did that really happen or am i making it up,” which apparently is a sign of childhood emotional negligence or some shit like that. So basically this will prob end up being a series of extremely personal anecdotal text posts that i have shared with.. Absolutely no one prior to now, for all of my two followers to read (but tbh y’all don’t even have to, i’m mostly keeping this up here for me & prob to have something to share w my therapist, but i won’t stop y’all)

Part I - Oh no, I Caught “The Gay!” Alright, so boom: sexuality. I know i don't shut up about being gay, i know i am entirely way too hype about having a gf and being absolutely fucking smitten with her (AND WOMEN IN GENERAL), but when it feels like i’ve been forced into being silenced about that for sooo fucking long, shit can you blame me? I’ve been pretty open about it as an adult (p much 20 & on or so), it wasn’t like.. This huge secret or anything, but it also wasn’t something i went out of my way to make public. I never officially came out, and unfortunately when people found out it was because this real crazy chick decided to out me out of nowhere and i guess i just figured i had to own up to it, i didn’t really care what people thought of it then. It was weird answering questions, but easier to navigate in my 20s, though more on that later. I did let my partners know if i was dating anyone seriously (as seriously as you can as a teenager anyway), but past that idk, it just never came up. And i sometimes envy the younger kids/adults that like.. Have all these resources and labels available to them now, you know. I feel like its a lot easier to explore who you are and your identity today than it was when i was in middle school, having an extremely hard time sorting out my feelings for my “friends” (read as: i usually thought i just really wanted to be their friend, but also was v aware of how attractive they were to me, but it didn’t seem okay to talk about; whereas, middle schoolers now are a little more open? Have more labels? i have always settled for gay, Bc i did like and develop feelings for guys too but even then knew i liked my friends more). And i mean it was always something i personally was okay with, i wouldn’t deny myself the pleasure of finding girls attractive whatsoever. It’s weird looking at kids now like “oh no, they’re only children!” But i was all of 11 yrs old, first day of sixth grade, when i literally prayed that hands down THE prettiest girl in my 5th period would sit next to me as soon as i saw her walk in and had instant butterflies when she smiled at me and took that empty desk, like holy shit lmao (bruh.. She was 5’1”, puerto rican, and in my head at the time, looked RIGHTTTTT. We were partners in that class for the rest of the year and best friends outside of that class and her voice & her laugh, like bro!!!! Again, confusing and frustrating to have a crush on her, know that, be her friend and hello ofc she’s gorgeous so every boy was always after her too. Navigating feelings was so hard, but then i found a boy to crush on and felt normal again lmao). BUT it just seemed like the normal thing to do was not talk about it or ever bring it up to anyone at all at any point in time which i realize now is.. Yikes lmfao. I think it would have been different if i had someone to navigate that with, i was “mature” enough to figure it out on my own, and know to just keep it to myself, and accept it and not feel like a weirdo or anything, but not always be so eager to act on it. Again the older i’ve gotten, the easier it’s been to tell the story of how my parents thought the neighboring boy and i were so cute together in pre-k & meanwhile i was kissing this one girl during nap time, lmao. So like, i’m okay with that much; i don’t and never have felt guilty about being gay (bi, pan, whatever), even growing up in a church bc it rly was something that just came naturally to me from the jump. Puberty was slightly confusing but not a total shock either.

High school was even more so challenging and confusing? Bro. one of my best friends (and we’re def still friends now) and i were very close and the bitch had absolutely no boundaries whatsoever. Granted she had always been like that, I had been friends with her since the 6th grade as well and had seen her with other girls and boys but never put too much thought into it (you will see that this is my reaction to 90% of shit that happens to me). I’ve posted before and recently about being gay but not wanting to be predatory but getting mixed signals in “regular girl friendships,” and this was fucking textbook, lmao. I never got my hopes up or anything, and i just didn��t consider being with her a real option, but yeah, no, i deadass liked her and i’m sure she knew and didn’t mind the attention either lmao. Call it my first situationship i guess, lmao. We shared a locker so she would leave me notes and gifts, and vice versa, we’d bake for each other, we’d walk to class together, usually have lunch together, so on and so forth; she had no problem holding my hand and hugging me and being affectionate and calling me baby but like.. We weren’t dating. That was a thing. I both welcomed it and brushed it off; i was really comfortable with her physically, but still thinking i should only be dating boys even though they made me extremely uncomfortable and i’d flinch if they got too close (lmao, i have an entire separate section ready for men; cue eyeroll). I mean she kind of lead me on but not rly? I knew not to take it srsly BUT i also knew i’d be down as fuck if she ever changed her mind lmfao. Deadass she’s a 10/10 both then and now and she’d always do this cuuuute thing where she’d wrap her hands around my neck and kiss my nose and bruh i’d melt. Most people were already convinced we were dating *shrug* anyway though, this guy tried to hook up w me but i was like ehhhh so he ended up hooking up w her instead and i started dating my first boyfriend (who was terrible, abusive, and legitimately ruined my life in the short span of 10 months or so but that’s in the men’s section). It’s not like all of that magically stopped either though but i never pressed her for anything more, just entertained her and got butterflies every time she would hit me w that “i’d so love to date you” but her issue was she was comfortable with women but not sexually. I obviously wasn’t trying to sleep w her at 14, but i get it, that's her prerogative & it never got in the way of our actual friendship & i 100% value her as JUST my friend, she’s been rly great to me and has been there for the shittiest of times and has gotten me out of some rough spots. It was what it was lol. And there were other pretty girls after her that i would have considered pursuing but just never went for it. There was this senior girl i had for a class the following year and she also was and still is just jaw-dropping, beautiful, like holy shit. Something about her reminded me of strawberries and just made me feel cozy, you know? She always smelled nice, her hair was strawberry blond wellll past her waist, and she had to have been dumb to not notice me checking her out 25/8. Anyway though, i’m not trying to talk about every single girl i’ve had a crush on; the point is, i have always been firm on my sexuality you know, i never felt like i had a “questioning” phase and it just felt normal (and it has been annoying to have people question just bc i wasn’t “out” long enough to them? Or bc i’m straight passing as far as being fem + dating shitty guys goes). The only weird part was just never pursuing or never having the means to, obviously every girl is 500% straight in high school, or they sure were back then at least. I knew all of like two or three openly out girls and while i was not interested in none of them, i did envy the confidence they had not in just “hey i’m GAY,” but one of them was notorious for just pursuing any girl she was interested in and having it work in her favor? Even the “straight” ones? In my head i could only think like bro how the fuck? Anyway, proceed w checking chicks out on the sly and dating shitty guys (#bars)

So of course, college came around right, and thankfully i knew myself well enough at this point to know that my relationship with women was completely different from my relationship with men. How we interacted, how they made me feel, etc. i moved out at 17, had my own apartment, all that jazz. I had a serious boyfriend but we did do the “open relationship” thing for a bit and lo and behold, available women were everywhere. And we’d chat, flirt, and i knew the physical attraction was there (and, you know, i’m not going to get graphic or anything but confirmed i enjoyed that aspect as well) but not rly much else. So again, never put much thought into it, i was open to being with women romantically but it just never came up and finding straight guys to date after that boyfriend and i broke up was just easier. At this point, i took a “cross that bridge when i get to it” when it came to “officially” being out; it seemed pointless to make this huge deal when i was still just dating dudes, or not dating anyone at all. Not too long thereafter though, one of my close friends (i only have a couple) called me freaking out, it was adorable, lmao. So this girl confessed her love to her and she was confused about what she should do lmao (my gaydar went off THE SECOND I first met my friend and i mentioned it in passing but she always brushed it off). The whole “do what feels right” line is tired but that was the only advice i can give her really. Putting a little more thought into the situation this time and wishing i had someone i could call when i was freaking out over a girl i told her like “you know, there’s nothing wrong if you’re gay. I’m gay, i turned out just fine.” long story short, if you ask her she will always credit me for helping her come to terms with that, but she was also the first person outside of a boyfriend that i said that out loud to and.. It was nice. We kinda helped each other through that and it was nice to have that one gay friend finally lmao. But let’s just fast forward to maybe a year after that, i’d talk to girls here and there nothing serious, when the same crazy girl that liked my friend wants to talk to me (i told y’all the lesbian/local community dumb small) my friend didn’t care and i wasn’t trying to date her seriously, i was in town for the holidays and figured it’d be fun, whatever. So i was going to LIC w A HUGEEE group of my friends. Like. a significant amount, that i had only seen a couple times since high school, and that i obviously did not share my personal business with. This girl knew i wasn’t out, i told her not to be acting crazy either smh. So i knew the girl in passing but not like officially and we did most of our talking online/texting (bc thats how lesbians meet lmao). Keeping that in mind, this is the first time i’m actually meeting this girl not irl but def f2f y’know.. And this is the third time that i’m saying she’s crazy. We find a place to meet at LIC between sets and i told my friends i was waiting for another friend of mine thinking that would be the end of that. Now the whole “lesbians are crazy and move way too fast” trope was a thing w this one bc as soon as she spotted me she ran to me and just kissed me, i swear it was straight out of The Notebook, bro and i turned around and my group of MAYBE 10 friends that caught that were literally staring, wide-eyed, jaws dropped. And i just brushed it off and said k, i’m ready to go, and the questions from there on after just would not stopppppp. It was partially embarrassing bc i am not a spotlight ass bitch whatsoever, but most people that saw us together strangers and whatnot thought we were a “cute couple” and we were complimented most of the night. But every time she’d hug me or kiss me or anything, my friends would be ready behind her back in group of three trying to mouth over me like “girlfriend???? Dating?????” and no she wasn’t my girlfriend but the way she was all over me i had to claim her as such at that point to make my life easier lmao. And i can laugh it off now because no, it rly wasn’t that big a deal to me then but it does kind of suck that it ended up not being my own choice y’know. I had fun with her, the night ended well, she left w me and slept over (nothing happened [that time] but it was still nice nonetheless lol). New years eve was the next couple days and we made plans together and again, we weren’t official or like REALLY talking and it was a (different) group of us going to this house party. I didn’t think she’d do the same thing like, bro without asking or anything, imagine if i was a person that did seriously mind?? Anyway, she got drunk and was the life of the party, she has quite the presence, and by the time it was midnight she straddling my lap making out with me and thats how i came out to everyone else i knew and whoever wasn’t at any of those two events sure did receive texts and pics of my date and i. It was embarrassing initially cause this girl!! Why the fuck did she do that!! Lmao, explaining myself to my closest friends was odd bc they were offended i didn’t tell them sooner and i’m just like.. It never came up at all you know. With that said, i have waited to see if i would ever seriously date a woman bc i knew i wanted to but the opportunity never presented itself until recently, and that’s why ya’ll see me out here screaming on rooftops about how gay i am bc i finally get to do that, on my own terms, and bc i love someone soooo so so dearly.

#okay so this part isn't complete but its late and i didn't wanna back out on posting it #fair warning if you decide you want to read this irs super long #rly personal (nothing graphic or anything - just personal)#and it's stuff i have never said out loud or to anyone.. ever p much #maybe mentioned in passing but thats about it #this part is the nicest part to write about bc.. the others i have planned are rly ugly #but they'll also be posted soon enough #personal #?#me #idk i feel like this should have another tag #writings

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blaisein · 7 years

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ok so here’s the story from a-z so i’ve never vacationed at a lake before?? but apparently the fam was into it idk. so three of my siblings went down to the dock where i was reading (it’s a creepy ass dock scratch that a creepy ass place i have the receipts so does kianna ask her it is on its friday the 13th shit and did i mention i have to sleep alone in one of the cabins tonight? boi bai but anyway) they were all like omg caelyn get in the water with us and i was like probs not but ok. and they are splashing and being gross but highkey i’m too scared bc for some reason the water was giving me anaconda the movie vibes so i wasn’t gonna go in! but they are stinky and calling me out for being scared (i’m the oldest out of who was there but do i care? no it’s scary) and somehow they convinced me to get in. well more like pushed they pushed me in. i was screaming. like i tried to climb back up and these demons would kick my head back down like what !!!! anyway all drama aside i eventually was okay with it and we were like u kno what would be cool? floaties. or whatever those big things are called like tubes and shark floats or wtvr. so we got in we were splashing but lowkey i was waiting for the snakes to come. but anyway so we’re racing and stuff and eventually i was over it so i just got out and my siblings were like omg caelyn get your float as i was like ok but it like .. started to drift away. by then i was too lazy to get it even tho i def could have (ok actually i was once again scared bc i floated towards the creepy hanging boat we have so i said not today) but they started yelling bc it was my fault but meanwhile none of their asses were getting it either if it was such a big deal ??? so i was like i am only getting it if y'all swim with me and they wouldn’t and tbh it’s pathetic lol i’m 4 years older than the oldest one my sisters that were there but whatever. so they are just being mean and i’m too scared and so it starts to get FAR like so far away so i actually start swimming bc imma get my ass beat if i lose it. so i head off, super scared bc i know the snakes were following me. and jet skis and boats and shit are making waves so i’m like fr and the tube is just so gone now but i’m swimming anyway. i mean in a blink of an eye this floatie vanished. then i’m like damn imma drown (the irony bc i used to swim competitively like i’m a swimmer but i did NOT want to do this i wanted to die via drowning instead of snakes ok) but eventually i’m like “HELP OMG HELP” bc i was getting too lazy and then this big boat comes and is like “um u ok fam” and i said “no i’m dying and i lost my floatie” bc by then my man was gone like out of sight idk how it happened. so i can still hear my siblings yelling at me from the shore, the skanks were salty bc they knew they’d get in trouble too. then the people in the boat pick me up but tbh in that moment i felt like if my brother and sisters weren’t there i may have been kidnapped bc i’m paranoid. anyway. so i am getting yelled at by them ugh so annoying so i haul ass up to the house to tell my parents and my grandparents about what happened. i rly didn’t want to but i swear my little siblings were bullying me! lol. my gma is like fr caelyn and my mom was like just go swim for it but ??? pls. so my dad and grandpa are like ok we’re gonna drive to the other end bc he thought he could see it out of the window (this is so dramatic all for a tube!!) like he was out there with binoculars. i felt bad so i was like “ok i’ll stay in my bathing suit so i can dive in this is my duty my responsibility my fault” n everyone rolled their eyes bc they know i’m flaky lol. anyway we get in the car and my grandpa drives us to the house where he thinks he saw it get stuck by a pier. so we walk up to the door (the house is gorgeous it’s aesthetic probs cost a million and bajillion dollars) and knock. no one answers. we see packages out front so we’re like “ok maybe they’re away” so my grandpa sNEAKS AROUND BACK AND STARTS TRESPASSING and i’m like oh no this is death. so i go with him and we run out back and get on their dock which is LIT. i’m talking hammocks, jet skis, couches, chairs, a boat, a bAR LIKE AN ALCOHOL BAR (lowkey i looked for some jameson), and all this crap i was shook. we looked and couldn’t find this stupid ass float thing and then a boat comes thru. it’s the people and the dog that saved my life!! but like … they were getting close and i was sure they were getting ready to dock so i start sweating. this was their house we’re about to get our asses beat. so my grandpa’s charming ass self starts to explain the situation and the lady is like … ok she said okay like maybe 50 times i was fr sweating. perspiration was real. and then like they start actually connecting i was like um what’s happening. they’re talking and he’s being all smooth and the husband was like ok lemme get out on one of our thousand jet skis and see if i can find it. and so my grandpa and the wife are just talking and i’m sitting there with the dog chilling then they’re like “omg we have the same lawyer !! what” like they are BONDING OVER HERE HE GOT HER NUMBER SHE’S LIKE COME OVER FOR A COCKTAIL?!? i was shook like we fr were committing a crime and snooping and btw they like saved my life earlier and def thought i was problematic but here we are. then i start talking w them and they live right next to my university they offered me to chill during the school year like ???? and she said if i ever wanted to VACATION WITH THEM in california i could like wffffff they are freaking millionaires i will take them up on that. anyway so we made bros with these people and they were like ok we’ll text u if we find it (text us wtf is happening guys this is all bc of a floatie and my problematic lazy ass). but i mean we still didn’t find the tube but by then we said whatever let’s just buy a new one (after 2 hours we came to this genius conclusion). so we go back to our cabins and my grandpa is like OMG I SEE IT HOP BACK IN THE CAR and by now i’m 50 shades of done with this but it’s my fault so i hauled ass. so we get in the car and start driving god knows where i’m like wtf but we arrive at ANOTHER HOUSE it’s under construction so my grandpa is like yeah we can def trespass here too and i’m like !! tf ??? but i get out anyway. and #1 i’m like how do you know the floatie is here this is tragic. so we start walking towards the lake but it’s like all woods here i’m fr walking in my bikini and flip flops it’s tragic. so my grandpa is like “ok u stop i don’t want you to get hurt so just stand here” and tbh i didn’t protest bc i’m lazy trash and also i know he wouldn’t let me i could get in trouble lol. so my 72 year old grandfather in his golf shirt and khaki pants starts climbing down to the lake and i see him JUMP OVER A FENCe he is as extra as i am. but yeah so then he disappears and he calls me and he’s like “is the tube black with yellow shit” and i said !!!! that’s it!! so 5 mins later he runs up, sweating and holding the tube i just stood there like “this was the most extra thing they are $5 at the store” but we found it we got it we survived and then we went home and had drinks with the millionaires lol so this was very long but i’m not a good story teller it was so DRAMATIC and i don’t think i hyped up enough the part where i almost died i was going under my fear was crimpling. but lol the end!! this was not worth the wait lol but lemme tell you the millionaires are cool i’m about to go jet ski also hmu if you wanna see pics of my friday the 13 house i'm sleeping in alone i'm shook

#get ready for the most dramatic thing #i teased y'all long enough in the ooc for this #ooc #this isn't even a good story but i wanted you guys to at least know why i've been away the entire day lol

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