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#i just love the whole nations being in the spotlight idea
googlein1942 · 9 months
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ive been so into rdr2 lately and i keep thinking about public nations verse where people making historical games/movies/shows/etc. consult nation people on historical tidbits and accuracy and whatnot, so queue Alfred “Favorite era of the US was the wild wild west” Jones finding his way to rockstar studios to help them out with the game accuracy/go on about whacky people he met during those days while the studio is just like write that down write that down
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jakelcckley · 2 years
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omg the leftovers hcs were amazing 😭💙 you're an amazing writer
How do you think the moonboys would react if they found you having fast reflexes? Like if one of them was clumsy steven and dropped something but you caught it unnaturally fast. (My brother has fast reflexes and my sister always throws stuff at him to catch his off guard lol)
omg thank you so mucchhh!! I used to write fanfics before (especially harry potter fanfics lmao) but I stopped because of my grammatical errors. And hmmmm, fast reflexes, eh? Let's see what could I come up with how it happened and how each of them reacts:
Steven: was awestruck of how fast your reflexes are. It first happened when you were just passing by at the national museum. He looked like one of those tour guides and you went up to ask him what the etched symbols in the clay tablets meant (because you were in a museum, and the least thing that you could do is actually learn the background and history that you have zero knowledge of, right??). He looked like a deer in the headlights at first but after a few seconds of awkward silence, he gave you the rough translation of it and you were amazed by his ability to translate the symbols and how much information he holds about the history of Egypt. You commended him for it, and he has gotten all shy and fidgety. His name is steven (as you read out from his badge) and it turns out that he's not a tour guide and he handles the gift shop within the museum. His stuttering behavior alone is enough to know that he is not used to receiving praises and being under the spotlight. Due to steven's erratic movements; unbeknownst to him was there's a hundred year old ancient looking jar behind him with just a single fragile pillar as a stand. it really looks like one of those artefacts that was not supposed to be left alone without a glass case. Before you know it, you moved in a light speed manner and caught the heavy, scary looking jar on your hands just in time before it tilts completely and fell off to the floor. Steven was frozen and wide-eyed in fear, and all he could see that time is his love of his life saving his arse from being fired.
Marc: didnt mind it at first after steven recounted the story of your meet-cute with him in the museum and how steven was engrossed to you already even after the management still fired him. After being together with them for almost a year and after the whole incident of harrow summoning ammit: you have successfully insisted marc to bring you in a mission after he lost the bet between you two; and what happened after, it left marc dumbfounded. The mission was already going sideways as soon as marc realized that the target had already become aware of your presence. Marc couldn't reach you any faster and the target had unexpectedly thrown a ticking time bomb to where you are standing. He watched you turn around to catch the ticking bomb with your hand at lightning speed. it was just in time before it countdowns into zero and you have thrown it back with all of your might to the target where it successfully landed and exploded. Marc was stunned after witnessing how quick your reflexes are, even Khonshu shuts up for the first time. Steven took granted of Marc's stillness and fronted to cheer and shower you with praises for how good that was. After that night and when you two reach home, Marc finally shows up and kisses you roughly before his kisses turned mellow and soft, almost apologetic. Marc still couldn't believe what happened back there and he promised that he won't bring you any more in his missions because he fears that your life is in peril every time you are out of his sight and your reflexes might not be enough to keep you alive in the long run. Marc couldn't bear the idea of losing you and he will blame himself forever if that happens.
Jake: was the other persona who you have not met yet properly, but you are kinda aware of. You became used to the nights where you are suddenly awoken at 2 am because of the lack of warmth coming from the other side of the bed. The only traces left by your partner on your home were the creases in the pillow and sheets. it's already 4 am and you couldn't sleep anymore because of the uneasiness on your stomach ever since you woke up, and jake or whoever fronted in the middle of the night is still nowhere to be found. Instead, you tried to distract yourself by sitting at the kitchen and turning your laptop on. you decided to check your email that was bombarded with emails coming from secure and encrypted networks. Minutes later after scrolling and opening some of the emails, you instinctively tuned out the eerie white sound of your apartment before swiftly moving out of the chair and landing behind the kitchen counter to hide. Your eyes traced the knife that pierced through the wooden kitchen cabinet above the kitchen sink. It was thrown at your direction when you were (stupidly) sitting with your back at the open. A slow and heavy clap resounded in the silence of your flat and you cautiously stood up to see who it was. Unmistakably, it was jake who entered the apartment through the window with a dangerous smirk plastered on his face. He opened his mouth and a hoarse rough voice filled the tense air, "eres muy rapida, corazón. Muy buena en ocultar tu identidad también." (You're very fast, sweetheart, very good at hiding your identity too) Jake says, "how about coming with me on a ride, agent?"
THAT WAS SUCH A RIDE OMG. IM SORRY IF IT TOOK ME A LONG TIME TO RESPOND AND IT FELT LIKE THIS WAS A REACH??? I'm sorry if it's not what you expected but it ended up with the reader as a secret agent and a trained ex-assassin, it is the only explanation why you have unnaturally fast reflexes. jake leaves every midnight and he uses his connections to gather information about you.
thank you so much for reading and sending me this!!! I had a great time imagining this whole thing and this is the result of it lol. I apologize if there are any grammatical errors, i also used google translator for jake and I apologize if there are errors in that translation. I am open for corrections, and i appreciate them 🫶🏼. I will sleep now as it is almost 7 AM from where I am lol.
Thank you once again @avatar-of-procrastination 💥 hope that you like it!
Link to the headcanon about who's more possesive: marc or jake?
Link to the headcanon about our moon boys finding out that you ate their leftovers.
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blaintism · 11 months
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Name five scenes that show off Blaine’s best qualities?
sorry for taking a couple days to respond I knew I'd really have to sit and think this one out!
the first scene that comes to mind is when finn basically baits him into thinking he's going to get a solo but is actually talking about rory. while like 90% of the other glee characters would yell at him, storm out, or slap somebody, he just says it's a great idea and rory will do a great job. I think it's something people get wrong about his character all the time, that because he sings a lot he's a diva the likes of rachel. I know anderberry is popular but I think they're more disimilar than people think. rachel throws a fit when things don't go her way. the kick to blaine's character is whether he gets something good or not he doesn't mind. I think it's a really endearing quality. he loves singing, and does it whenever he gets the chance, but he also is so positive about sharing the spotlight in a way that's sort of rare on the show. another example to this point is that he was willing to not audition for tony for kurt, or that he always is featured in group numbers or a duet in competitions after joining NDs.
which reminds me of the whole thing in season five where tina offers him a solo for nationals because everyone agreed he deserves it for working hard, and then like two episodes later when he got valedictorian they're mad he got a solo because he gets 'handed things' but they were the ones who handed him this thing. and then he doesn't perform a solo at nationals and does a duet with tina, who was the one mad at him also. what. anyways. back to the question at hand LOL
secondly we always have to acknowledge the scene at the end of prom queen. i think it's a really beautiful moment of character growth. blaine in season two is clearly someone who went through some things and is very afraid because of this, and we get this very special moment where he faces his fears for kurt. to me it shows his heart. he loves sooo big
a third thing i really like is blaine standing up for jane in season six. at first he's a little thrown off by the whole thing but he ends up being fully behind her and i think it shows a good quality that even after the vote when she maybe doesn't even want to be in the group anymore he threatens to quit. just wants to make things right either way!!
fourthly can i just say a lot of his relationship with sam? in general i think the way he handles having a crush on him shows this quality he has in sort of putting those he cares about before himself (not always so much to the healthiest degree.. but he's sweet). he really wants to make people happy. i think for the last scene i can point out this in a lot of his friendships but i think i'll refer to my favorite: tina. particularly when he's concerned about her in the season five premiere so he schemes to make the guys take her to prom. that's his best friend who is so mean and he just wants to help her. anyways this has been long and gone a little all over the place but here you go.
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wahlpaper · 6 months
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Cleat Cute Review
Cleat Cute by Meryl Wilsner
CW: Internalized Ableism, Vomit, Described Sex, Drinking in Excess, Swearing, Injury Recovery, Money Problems, Sports Violence, Panic Attacks, Medical Transphobia
5/5
Put a red-haired woman on the cover of a queer book and I'm so there. The cover of Meryl Wilsner's Cleat Cute was all I needed to ask my library to get the audiobook. In middle school, I played midfield in soccer. I don't remember much beyond the basics of the sport and haven't picked up much since. I have enjoyed soccer romance stories like Bend it Like Beckham, but it's no longer the special interest it was in middle school. Essentially, I wasn't looking for a romance in it. This novel appeared on some list I saw about upcoming books and it caught my eye. I could tell it would be a romcom that was sweet and light in tone, the kind of story I struggle to put down. 
Phoebe Matthews is a rookie in professional soccer, but she gets drafted to the best team in the country right out of college. She has her sights set on joining the National Team Roster next. It's a World Cup year, and Phoebe's team captain, Grace Henderson, is doing her best to look forward to it. It's hard for her to do when she's lost her excitement for the whole profession. Phoebe is full of energy and passion, but not just for soccer. She feels this way about Grace too. Will the women getting close to each other be enough to change their lives for the better? Or will they find out they aren't being honest with themselves? 
At first, I thought the writing was a bit simple, but I was quickly sucked in by the characters, the plot, and the setting. Some issues were resolved a little too easily, and I felt that the POV broke its unofficial rules sometimes. These issues were minor when looking at the book as a whole. Wilsner is great at world-building, having created a fully-realized version of Women's Soccer that works as a nice alternative to what we have in real life. I don't get visual thoughts, but I understood the physical settings being used in the books. While there are two MCs, Cleat Cute utilizes a full cast of characters. All of them felt fleshed-out, interesting, and distinguishable from each other. I will absolutely be reading more of Wilsner's books if they're anything like this one. 
One thing that surprised me in Cleat Cute was the neurodivergent representation. I didn't find this book on a list of autistic books or ADHD books, so I had no idea it would be a central part of the story. Phoebe has undiagnosed ADHD, which is an important part of her arc. Grace's sister has it, which means that Grace is coming from an understanding and respectful place when she talks about the disorder with Phoebe. As for Grace, it is mostly suggested through traits that she is autistic but undiagnosed. It's only directly referenced in her thoughts once, though. I do wish the narrative had spent as much time on Grace's neurodivergence as it did with Phoebe’s, but I do have other books for that. Either way, I felt autistic joy reading about both Phoebe and Grace living their queer soccer star lives while also getting to be their full selves by the end. 
Being realistic to the sport, Cleat Cute has a lot of queer characters in it. Lesbians, a bi woman, a non-binary goalie, and Phoebe's trans brother are all featured in the story. The author, Wilsner, is non-binary and writes their characters from an experienced and loving place. Being a professional soccer player can come with a bit of time in the spotlight. While this makes Grace uncomfortable, she wonders if she should use it to be there for other lesbians. Cleat Cute does a great job of expressing why it's important for famous people to come out while also reminding everyone that consent is necessary. Every celebrity that comes out makes the world a little safer, but it'll never be worth it for them to do something they aren't comfortable with.
Cleat Cute by Meryl Wilsner is a great queer sports book for those who want that in a New Adult novel. It's a light and easy read with great representation. If you're a foodie, into soccer, or a fan of New Orleans, this book will be especially enjoyable for you! Join Phoebe and Grace as they prepare for the soccer season and try to navigate their feelings!
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ambriel-angstwitch · 9 months
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Fourth of July through the Lens of Zuko (and Azula)
It was the Fourth of July You and I were, you and I were fire, fire, fireworks That went off too soon
Fireworks that went off too soon - Fireworks are beautiful sights to behold due to careful planning. One going off early is an unfortunate accident that would ruin the show. Due to their upbringing of constantly being pressured to achieve the highest ironically Zuko and Azula couldn’t reach their full potential. Azula was excelling from a young age which put a spotlight on her. This made it so failure no longer was an option but failure is how we grow. When she feels as though she’s failing she completely breaks down. On the flip side we have Zuko who could never seem to be enough. He constantly was left chasing his fathers ideas of what’s right for firebending and actions that he didn’t do what was better for him. Then he was sent young and angry on a wild chase around the world. If they’d been allowed to grow on their own time and learn in their own ways they could have been well rounded and intelligent individuals who could have worked well together. But they’d been forced to grow up too soon. All this is similar to how if the firework had gone off at the right time it would have been a sight to behold but due to its timing it became a mess
And I miss you in the June gloom too
Pete uses “the June gloom” to describe the fairly uneventful month before July. Zuko probably missed his home the most in the uneventful times, in the years where Aang wasn’t out of the ice when his purpose wasn’t as easy to track.
I said I'd never miss you, but I guess you never know
Zuko never seemed to be miss Azula his goal was always to regain his fathers approval and to get back to his father. But in a lot of ways he did miss her even after he had her again because there was a time before they were pitted eachother that all they had for eachother was love when Zuzu wasn’t used to mock but rather because K sounds are hard for young children to use.
May the bridges I have burned light my way back home on the fourth of July
Zuko throughout the series consistently burns the bridges that will lead him home. For example when he wanted to go home to the Fire nation he did the actions of a traitor as the blue spirit. Though the interesting thing about this wording is that the bridges burning is what lights the way back home so you can’t see the way until you’ve created the destruction which is similar to how Zuko doesn’t realize that his destiny until after he betrays Iroh. Until he’s laid in the wreckage of his mistakes that he realizes that being in the Fire Nation won’t make him happy. That he needs to carve his own path. That his uncle has been the only person that’s been with him through all his struggles. The Gaang and Uncle become his home.
I'll be as honest as you'll let me
Zuko is willing to admit to all his wrongdoings and seek forgiveness. He’s changed. But the Gaang have a hard time believing him and worry it’s just a trick. After all Azula was great at lying, but Zuko unbeknownst to them lacks this skill.
I miss your early morning company If you get me
Zuko misses Iroh the person who was there for him when he woke up on the ship the first time and any other time he woke up from a nightmare.
You are my favorite what if You are my best I'll never know
After Zuko saw Katara and Sokka’s sibling dynamic there’s a part of him that’s jealous of what they have. Azula is his favorite what if, he wants to believe that under different circumstances they could have been best friends or at least had a less deadly sibling rivalry. He wishes they could have had a healthy relationship.
And I'm starting to forget Just what summer ever meant to you What did it ever mean to you?
To Zuko summer meant their family was happy. It meant watching plays with his mom. It meant playing on the beach with Azula and Lu Ten. Ember island is where he remembers his family whole and happy. Then most recently Ember island is the first place that we see Azula be vulnerable, they both reconnect. We don’t know exactly what Ember Island used to mean to Azula but we know now that they’re teens she also finds it depressing. Whether that’s because it also used to be a happy place to her or if it’s because she used to see Zuko connect with Ursa and not her we’re unaware.
Oh, I'm sorry I didn't mean any of it I just got too lonely, lonely, whoa. In between being young and being right You were my Versailles at night
Zuko didn’t truly want to betray his uncle, he just got desperate for his fathers love and his home. Zuko wanted to be right about everything because if he wasn’t none of it would have been worth it. But in reality Iroh was the one bright spot left in his family
My 9 to 5 is cutting open old scars again and again 'til I'm stuck in your head Had my doubts but I let them out
Becoming the firelord reopened old wounds. He looked to his father for approval, he misses his mother and he even ended up teaming up with Azula again, despite their past which says that’s a bad idea.
You are the drought And I'm the holy water you have been without
Azula causes destruction and conversely Zuko has learned that Fire can bring life. They could complete and compliment eachother but they haven’t had the chance to.
And all my thoughts of you They could heat or cool the room, and no
Zuko has conflicting feelings about Azula. He loves her but their on different sides and she tried to kill him.
Don't tell me you cried Oh, honey, you don't have to lie
Azula tends to play with people’s emotions. If it benifitted her she would have told Zuko she missed him during his banishment but Azula always lies.
I wish I'd known how much you loved me I wish I cared enough to know
Zuko wished he’d realized how much Iroh loved and cared for him and how little his father did. These are things that would have affected his path.
I'm sorry every song's about you. The torture of small talk with someone you used to love
When Zuko returned to the Fire Nation, his and Azula’s conversations were mostly stilted and blunt. They rarely can open up to each other since Azula sees as weakness, something she can’t have and something she can exploit in Zuko
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fayesdiary · 1 year
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If you’re still willing to play around with that ask game, could I trouble you for 1 with Caminoka? :)
Sure thing! Gotta give the lesbians some time in the spotlight 💜💓
When I started shipping them
I don't remember precisely, but I think it must have been some months after I got more into the FE fandom, which at the time for me was *sigh* ... Reddit.
My thoughts
These two are so sapphic it hurts.
Camilla definitely at the very least fancies Hinoka a lot, given she flirts with her at almost every chance she gets in Fates, but Hinoka's reactions also say a lot. Her face gets as red as her hair, she becomes incredibly flustered... but never actually rejects Camilla's advances. And this is consistent even in Heroes and Warriors, too!
Honestly if Fates had proper same-sex S supports that weren't for Corrin you bet they'd be the first to marry each other.
What makes me happy about them
Gods, the flirting. The shameless flirting. I could watch Camilla hit on Hinoka all day, their dynamic is everything.
It's also really sweet when you remember how self-conscious Hinoka feels about being a tomboy and not feminine enough, especially for a princess. And here comes Camilla, the peak, most feminine woman you could think of, adoring everything about her. How validating that must have felt for Hinoka once she gets used for it?
Also they're both really cool in completely different ways!
What makes me sad about them
The whole angst potential in Birthright and Conquest. Imagine realizing you're in love with the princess of the nation who's bringing your kingdom to ruin? Who's responsible for the deaths of your siblings? Just how conflicted and ashamed of yourself you must feel?
In addition, Queen Camilla/Kinshi Hinoka(who could be Queen Hinoka from CQ) in Heroes is just this tenfold. Just realizing how better things could have been and longing for someone you should despise to death at this point.
Things I look for in fanfic
Honestly I just want more fics where Camilla/Hinoka is the main pair. Granted, I haven't looked for them very much, but I feel like I rarely find a story where they're the main focus.
Oh, and of course I want flirting. Even better if they're flirting while fighting each other.
Who I’d be comfortable them ending up with, if not each other
I'm not sure. I don't have any other strong ships for them, although I know they could definitely work with a lot of other people.
I know for sure they're other women, though.
My happily ever after for them
Post-Rev, and with Camilla leaving the Nohrian court. I'm not sure if Hinoka would live with her given how devoted she is to Hoshido, although the idea of them founding an orphanage together and basically being two moms is really cute.
Who is the big spoon/little spoon
Of course Camilla is the big spoon. But I like to imagine Hinoka trying to be the big spoon sometimes and Camilla finding it adorable.
Their favorite non-sexual activity
I'd say sewing because that's how they got close to each other, although sparring is another big one too!
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anyways while we’re on the subject of sg medical trauma. i feel like lena has an eating disorder. gonna talk ad nauseum about it under the cut.
developing an ed was kind of inevitable, i think, with the way the luthors policed her body growing up. her diet, exercise, supplements, etc, were regiments so strictly regulated by the luthors. and the results were relentlessly examined too - after all, if this bastard child has to bear the luthor name, then at the very least she has to wear it well.
in her adult life, as the luthorcorp ceo, it’s that same spotlight her adoptive parents put on her but...bigger. ruthless in new and different ways. social media gossips and tabloids openly speculate over her wait, print headlines about pounds she’s allegedly gained and crash diets she’s allegedly failed at. and the pregnancy rumors, always accompanied by a grainy pap photo with her protruding stomach circled in bold red ink, pop up weekly. her male coworkers laud her a bitch, a dyke, a fat pig, in various degrees of openness; even her female coworkers, trying to be supportive, tend to trigger her with ostensibly caring comments about a diet their sister successfully tried or a weight loss doctor their cousin raves about.
and so being in a relationship with kara is complicated for her, body image wise. because kara is quite literally inhumanly gorgeous, with a sculpted figure that every sapphic national city twitter-user thirsts over on the daily. and (in this little headcanon lena is fat btw bc truly that’s what we deserve) lena’s....not. not skinny, not muscular, not ‘mainstream attractive’.
but kara, somehow, loves her. all of her, kara claims, including her body. she presses kisses along her tummy before going down on her, traces loving fingers and lips over her stretchmarks, waxes poetic about how she wants to suffocate between lena’s thighs. reassures lena that no, her arm fat doesn’t look ugly in that dress, but if it would make her feel more comfortable, she can borrow kara’s supergirl cape to cover them up.
which is one thing.
but more than that, kara eats.
she gets belly bloat after downing an unholy amount of pasta. she devours carbs and sugars and fats without care. she scoffs at the idea that ‘food is fuel’, instead indulging in what she wants when she wants because it’s an opportunity to bond with family members over a meal, or because she trusts her body when it tells her it’s hungry, or just because it fucking tastes good. food isn’t evil, isn’t something that needs to be caged and regulated - it’s a source of pleasure, a vessel to facilitate interpersonal connection, a way to cultivate her old culture and heritage.....
she never criticizes lena’s eating habits, never so much as remarks when a package of oreos goes missing from the pantry only to be found empty beneath the bed later that day because lena still feels so much fucking shame about binging. she doesn’t comment on how weird it is that lena sometimes holds her plate in her lap, beneath the surface of the dining room table, because it makes it easier for her to eat when the food she’s consuming isn’t being perceived by anyone; she doesn’t condemn lena for wasting food when all she can manage is a few bites.
which is not to say that kara doesn’t try to help. she sends lena a poem one time, something about how you shouldn’t cut up your body into pieces for individual scrutiny because it is whole and it is good. she starts bringing lunch to lena’s office every weekday when lena admits that eating at work is particularly difficult for her, and she communicates with lena to develop a system where lena wordlessly indicates whether or not she wants kara to stay and chat with her during her lunch break based on how lena positions her desk calendar that afternoon. she uses nailpolish to paint intricate designs on lena’s nails when she notices that lena’s been picking at her skin more than usual, the art later serving as a reminder and source of strength for lena to help stop herself from caving in to the compulsion. she prepares snacks when she notices that lena hasn’t eaten in a while and wordlessly leaves them on the kitchen counter as a low-pressure way of encouraging lena to eat and helping reduce the amount of energy it takes lena to eat.
and when things get bad and kara notices that lena needs help help, she communicates with lena every step of the way, going out of her way to give lena agency and information.
so it’s complicated. recovery is weird, and anything but linear, and lena still has good days and bad days.
but she realizes that all of the days are markedly better now that she has kara by her side.
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randomvarious · 10 months
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Joe and the Chickenheads - "Just for the Taste of It" Hey Brother... Can You Spare Some Ska? Volume 2 Song released in 1996. Compilation released in 1997. Punk Rock / Comedy Rock
Plays: 5.2K+ on Spotify // 5.7K+ on YouTube
Alright, so, imagine, if you will, a commercial from the 80s, but set in a parallel universe in which the punk band Rancid also happens to already exist. Why, a scenario like that just might go a little something like this...
VOICEOVER: Hey, kids, do you love Rancid?! KIDS: Yeah! VOICEOVER: And do you love Diet Coke?! KIDS: Yeah!! VOICEOVER: Well, how would you like to hear one of Rancid's biggest hits, "Salvation," turned into a jingle for Diet Coke by a band called Joe and the Chicken Heads?!?! KIDS: FUCK YEAH!!!
Orange, California's Joe and the Chicken Heads (now known as Radioactive Chicken Heads) is kind of what you get when you mix "Weird Al" Yankovic, comedy metal band GWAR, and punk rock in a blender. They've been around for almost three whole decades now and have quite a penchant for churning out some of the dumbest, silliest, and most absurd songs you'll ever hear in your life, performed by people in full costume who have never actually revealed their true identities. Their mythos is derived from comics that the band's imaginative leader, Carrot Topp (no relation), used to write as a kid, which depicted mutant chickens and vegetables that had escaped from a farm where horrific experiments were being performed on them.
And to give you an idea of their...presentation...here they are getting the tiniest bit of national spotlight, performing a song of theirs called "Pest Control" on the Game Show Network's brief revival of The Gong Show in 1998 at around Halloween time. As what should probably come as a surprise to no one, because of just how fucking ridiculous their whole spectacle is, Joe and the Chicken Heads got gonged by GSN's viewers, i.e. eliminated, before they could finish their song. But they kept on playing anyway, and you got to see Carrot Topp beat up someone who was playing the role of Chuck E. Cheese.
youtube
Speaking of cheese, this guy off in the corner playing keyboards is the one who really does it for me the most within this particular performance.
Current mood:
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Anyway, back in 1996, this band of assorted weirdos, whose whole schtick fit magnificently well into 90s punk's love of immaturity and irreverence, released a song on a self-released demo cassette called Bird Brains that probably would've felt atrocious to an outsider, but for a punk, was a hilarious parody of Rancid's #21 hit on Billboard's rock chart, "Salvation," and served as an absurd paean to Diet Coke. And the following year, it appeared on Newport Beach, CA label Vegas Records' much more widely available Hey Brother... Can You Spare Some Ska? Volume 2.
So, something no self-respecting punk band would ever do is record a jingle for a ubiquitous soda brand, which is, conceptually, what makes this song funny in the first place. Despite Rancid being on a national powerhouse punk label like Epitaph and being a very famous band that was getting video rotation on MTV, they still put forth an image of rebelliousness. But I guess there's a point to be made here that, once you make it to MTV—in 1995, no less—you've sort of lost the ability to claim all that punk rock rebel cred, right? Like, in a way, you've become the Diet Coke of your own thing, haven't you? And I think that's what Joe and the Chicken Heads were ribbing them about with this song here, pushing that whole idea of selling out to a giant conglomerate like Viacom just one step further, to a point of utter absurdity, by making them spokespeople for Diet Coke.
But the other thing that makes this song funny is its execution, more specifically the vocals. Now, if you're not familiar with Rancid frontman Tim Armstrong's signature punk voice, he kind of has a way of sounding like a rambling, unintelligible, nitwitted, and scratch-raspy drunkard who rushes his words at times and seems to be in constant danger of nodding off and then falling from his barstool. And band member Puke Boy does a good job on "Just for the Taste of It" of exaggerating that famous vocal and not fully enunciating a lot of words.
I can't believe it's just one calorie No diet aftertaste, can't you see? In a can filled with thirst-quenching flavor Brand spankin' new cola with the classic taste you savor
Just a fun, dumb, and clever late 90s parody of one of the most popular punk bands of all time, done by a much lesser-known set of comedy punk rock cult favorites who are still kicking around to this very day.
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woodfinder8754 · 1 year
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Prime 5 Sights & Landmarks In East London, Jap Cape
The house is ingeniously designed to afford most privacy. Catering for our wedding was quite good; courteous staff. The facility would profit from a walking path for many who are not golf. The par-5 tenth has water operating diagonally throughout the fairway olivewood estate, presenting a problem on the second shot. The dogleg left 524m 18th is an excellent closing hole, a wide fairway giving golfers the chance to be aggressive off the tee, though three fairway bunkers are there to catch the lengthy hitters. The par-5s at Olivewood are among the many most challenging.
There is a triple car garage and a cabana on the Sandy Lane Property Owners Beach Facility. Olivewood, which sits on an attractive elevated lot of approximately 1.86 acres, was designed by Michael Gomes and accomplished in 2004. Drive lined with field hedges doubles as a wonderful serene strolling path “The Loop” and increasing and winding to a rock lined pathway alongside the long bladed grassy financial institution that result in olive groves …all main up to the principle residence.
Indigenous forest frames many of the holes, and thoroughly positioned water features, tees and greens spotlight the unique format of this course. The par seventy two course options many “risk and reward” holes. While the rough has been stored comparatively quick, lengthy bushveld grass on the outskirts awaits any errant pictures. Interesting is the very personal “outdoor shower” … such a pleasant expertise. The backyard areas are stunning and properly maintained. Golfers will love this place … the course is superb, we're informed.
While we're huge fans of mixing it up and bending the rules, we also hew to the idea that there is no need to alter something that's working. Red wine and steak are good with one another because of the compounds that mix on our palates after we put them together—namely fat, protein and tannins. While we're sipping and chewing and enjoying dialog at residence or our favorite steakhouse, there's a reaction at work in our mouths that heightens the pleasure of mixing two of our favorite things. The provincial staff, the Border Bulldogs, currently plays within the First Division of the Currie Cup competitors. Most national video games in East London are played at the Buffalo City Stadium, which holds around people and was a host stadium in the course of the 1995 Rugby World Cup.
Whilst waiting for our cab, we requested to take a seat on some exterior sitting underneath a patio, after being informed the restaurant was full. The white younger lady at reception was very snappy and refused saying that area is reserved for golfers. I mean, a 15minute await a visitor that just checked out shouldn't be this difficult. Guests should be treated the identical at checkin and at checkout. The value range is considerably overwhelming when you dreaming of getting married there.
The planning and positioning of the assorted “pavilions” maximize views to the Caribbean Sea, the golf course and surrounding gardens while offering pure cross ventilation through the whole home. The structure of the villa is based on Balinese design principals. It is a set of linked “pavilions” and intertwined garden courtyards. These aee set around a swimming pool and garden water features. The planning and positioning of the assorted “pavilions” maximises views to the Caribbean Sea, the golf course and surrounding gardens. It additionally supplies natural cross ventilation via the complete home.
Private pro & Homes online in South Africa, Flat to lease and home for sale on the main properties website. Please send me an enquiry from the web site to find out how to get approved or for a non-public viewing. The stunning house has loads to offer, area, consolation and luxury..... Walnut groves encompass “The Loop” and make a tranquil private entry to the Stanislaus River only a short stroll away.
After harvest the grapes had been cold soaked in open top fermenters for 5 days to extract maximum flavor, color and tannin. It was then allowed to undergo malolactic fermentation in French oak barrels for 10 months, leading to creamy mouthfeel and voluptuous texture. There are juicy flavors of black cherry, pink plum, and cranberry on the palate and a light-weight touch of bright olivewood estate pomegranate within the finish. This 100% Shiraz stunner from Australia’s Barossa Valley is identified as for the local colloquialism for estate manager, Factor. It is inky purple within the glass with aromas of black plum, ripe dark cherry, vanilla bean and mocha. In the mouth it's huge and bold with ripe fruit flavors and velvety tannins.
This delicious Bordeaux from Saint-Estephe is a blend of Cabernet Sauvignon and Merlot with touches of Cabernet Franc and Petit Verdot. It has aromas of black fruits with a lifted observe of shiny purple cherry and secondary whiffs of tobacco leaf and purple flowers. In the mouth it has ripe fruit flavors and balanced tannins. The tannins are a bit chewy however will hold as a lot as thick cuts of beef. The end is long with a touch of black licorice on the very finish.
The different pavilions are the household room, the garden entrance foyer, the dwelling room & primary verandah constructing, the dining room constructing and the breakfast and repair building. Olivewood is located on the distinguished olivewood estate Sandy Lane Estate. This luxurious property boasts 6 bedrooms and overlooks the third fairway of the Old Nine Golf Course at Sandy Lane. It's personal ridge entrance location affords Olivewood spectacular views of the West Coast and Caribbean Sea.
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alaminshorkar76 · 2 years
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barry-aston · 2 years
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thebarbaricbeast · 3 years
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astro notes mini cause im in the middle of a zoom meeting....part 3
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Aries in a Virgo degree especially in the inner planets could get easily irritated or mad
mercury in Scorpio have long term memory mercury in Gemini have short term memory.....just an observation
aquarius placements are bad bitches they probably started planning their business at 12 years old. and they are so excited to move out of the house lol they just want their independence...
moon in the 3rd house culture is deciding to wake up because the any electronic is on, the smell of food, guests over, just stimulation. if there is no stimulation or uniqueness from the day before they probably wont get out of bed same with mars/moon in Gemini, Aquarius moon, mars/moon in Sagittarius and mars/moon in libra
Lilith is the moon's errors and inaccuracy in its orbit which creates this dark feminine energy opposite the moon which is the divine receptive and submissive feminine. Lilith rebels against being submissive and receptive and dependable. the moon's faults are very unpredictable and are not foreseeable or calculated by observers this is what make Lilith so unpredictable and hard to maintain. the moon and Lilith naturally makes a square but if the moon and Lilith are in signs that makes an easy aspect this will smoothen the square. if there is a square and opposition on top of that then it will create an arena where the devil and god are at war meaning the dark feminine is at war with the "angelic" and divine feminine. This becomes the most powerful aspect Lilith can have. im gonna stop there lol this post is getting too long.....
having libra placement with some impulsive placements is very hard to maintain. libra is naturally passive aggressive but a aspect like "moon aspect pluto or moon to the mars" can have outbursts of outrage that no one saw coming
woman with harsh venus-jupiter aspect can be extremely frugal with money or extremely careless meaning they could buy the whole mall lol
venus in Sagittarius usually listen to an extreme of something for example extreme rap or rock if aspecting the moon they could skip songs alot
saggittarians with alot of pluto aspects or scorpio placements could have a "dont fuck with my freedom" vibe
i think taurus are the best actors. they have the ability to fabricate intense energy to act or perform
Pluto in the 12th house people could impact people for generations its like all people who are born will have a fundamental understanding on this person..ex: marilyn monroe
Lilith Aries/Aquarius culture is wearing red to a funeral
vesta is another feminine asteroid i like to think of it as mars and venus together with some Neptune........its a feminine spiritual flame that allows your to acquire goals.she relates to spiritual practices,work and devotion
Vesta being involved with Pluto could be seen in witchcraft or could be this edgy type of feminine
Scorpio risings with Jupiter aspects could be very intimidating they usually have a long nose...
i see alot of taurus that are veryyyyyy edgy like emo clothing and black and red orrrr ......just very simple clothing lol
mercury in aspect to asteroid sappho is a person that is very very good with their words they can lure people in with just a breath from their lips
sappho in aspect to Lilith is more of a captivating sexual nature.very sexually creative and if in hard aspect it could create someone that is excessively self indulgent in expressing their sexually or has trouble expressing their sexual side or it can be using their attraction to absorb negative things they could use to manipulate people(the opposite sex) to get what they want
moon in hard aspect with the ascendant are incredibly good at lying
they say Capricorn,scorpio,leo, and aries are more favorable placements for the midheaven although it willl do well i think Aquarius,libra,pisces and saggitaurius are very great too. aquarius relates to Independence, ideas, communities, and humans this is very good for a person that makes huge impact on the world. libra relates to justice, peace, relationships, and love/romance. i have never seen a libra mc native who was not welll liked unless there are harsh aspects affecting it. these people can really be anyone they want to be ..as president they could restore justice and peace and they could be huge business owners since libra is a cardinal sign which are known as the executives. everybody is attracted to these people and ive seen it could succeed in doctors too. pisces mcs are just amazing they help so much and they help the underdogs they are what keeps our communities alive. Sagittarius are the best leaders preferably in the midheaven they can lead nations and teach and inspire tons of people. they strive for knowledge and expand horizons and lands. they could expand countries as leaders and they could restore education. virgos mc are one of my faves too they are opposite pisces mc who are more inclined in the arts. they see the more practical approach in helping people. no matter what they have in their birth charts this placement will compel them to serve the world.
fortune conjunct jupiter in the birth chart is very important. it is a strong indicator of some type of success in life but the person has to go through long journeys to arrive there and pick up great knowlege.
lilith square the ascendant people might have strange marks or scars on their body that they never knew were there from time to time
mars square the ascendant might have had an ingury to remember as a child Pluto conjunct the ascendant in Sagittarius too
moon in a fire sign really crave a partner that is patient, understanding and really good with money.
i think Lilith in libra is the most dangerous Lilith sign because they are frighteningly charming. what they tend to is make people fall in love with them then impose them in a very manipulative way to express their undying love for them.if they feel that the love is not enough they leave the person in search for another men/woman or continue to manipulate the person into doing so. they do this to make themselves feel better because of an experience they will face or have faced in their life they feel the need for a partner to love them and if they dont feel its enough they will leave...unless they actually like this person but it happens......very manipulative in relationships. this would probably be the most unbalanced libra placement.
moon harsh aspect juno either attracts very emotional partners or partners that are emotionally absent....might be on their phones during dates alot lol
pluto harsh aspect to juno attract partners that want to control them...very jealous and protective
scorpio in the 4th house people are veryyyyy protective and they might be parents who teach their kids "the hard way"...they might have seaky children and children who are distant or children that are very clingy ...they know everything their child is thinking at all times...
every water moon hated going to school as a child( like kindergarten or pre-k) cause they didn't want their mommy to leave..probably frequent calls because they wanted "mommy" to come pick them up or really hates leaving their mom and entering school alone.
pluto in the 5th house people probably lost their virginity at a young age or just done something.....not good as a child...like steal a car etc
venus in the 8th/scorpio might be tempted to be exotic dancers lol or leo/libra in the 8th
sun in the 8th house people have the potential to be really really funny and entertaining. they probably have so much to say and are born with a natural confidence...they give me like god(but underworld) vibes and they are not afraid to put someone in their place. they would probably be involved in drama or just not care at all. (in school)......they have anger issues lol
child i just have to say that Sagittarius guys can be jerks....but not all of them but most of them lol
if you ever meet a immature scorpio you should probably run they will ruin your life...veryyyyy manipulative and they can be liars...verrry jealous........"if i cant have you know one can vibe" in a relationship.
scorpio risings can do weird thing with their bodies like with their tongues or fingers etc
venus square the ascendant people probably have this one feature that they really hate on their body.....
moon in water signs people tend to lie alot when it comes to situations with emotional pressure especially if this is in a air degree.
ive noticed that alot of people are jealous of leo risings
jupiter in the 1st house people love attention. they shower in it and they can do reckless things in in the middle of the spotlight
people with moon in Sagittarius probably had a mother that let the dad take charge or gave the kid space to explore life. Sagittarius moons probably went through alot.
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outofsstyles · 4 years
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KILLER QUEEN (80s!AU)
 A/N: Heyaa!! So here’s what happens when I watch Sing Street right after reading some of Olivia’s boyfriend!Harry prompts :) Also a huge thank you to Soph @canyon-moan​ for betaing this for me!! A gentle reminder that I was not, in fact, alive in the 80s so please take it easy in that aspect lol. If you like it *please reblog*, it helps a lot, also I’d love to hear your feedback!!!!
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Word count: 25.3k (I have no self control!! Someone stop me!!)
Pairing: Musician!Harry + Bassist!Reader
Prompts: making it official + enemies but secretly lovers
Warnings: Our typical mentions of sex, drugs and rock ‘n’ roll (and a lot of denim!)
Concept: You and Harry are in rival bands and you shouldn’t really get along but you can’t help it.
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It didn’t come as a surprise to you that, from the moment you agreed to be part of the band, your agenda would become more frantic. That’s all you read on magazines or see on the television on those late nights MTV programs that love to talk about that rockstar life. The shows and the sleepless nights. The drugs and the sex between stages. It’s always what comes to the minds of anyone that thinks about following the music path.
Of course, you’re far from being The Bangles or Duran Duran, but even when it comes to playing for uninterested drunks on small crummy bars, you still found yourself barely able to catch a breather from it. 
And it also doesn’t help that on top of it all, you also try your best to balancing your studies as you go into your third year of uni. So, between being tucked behind your bass during rehearsals and going around begging for stuck up pub owners to give a spot, you still have to find time for the busy class schedule that also blends with your tutoring job on the side. Sometimes it feels like juggling those two contrasting lives is too much, and when you walk home each day too exhausted to even function, you ponder if you should just drop one of them.
You still manage to fall into a rather chaotic routine of dragging through weekdays to fall into reckless weekends. It’s not easy, but you make it work.
Today, however, seemed to be an odd one. From the moment you woke up with the sound of birds chirping and the faint conversation of your neighbors outside your window, you felt a sense of relaxation that has become a rarity to you. It’s a welcoming change from your usual rowdy roommates bantering at each other or the loud music blasting through the walls that serve as your alarm on regular days. The silence that engrosses your normally-chaotic home is calming as much as it is strange. 
The whole day went by in a lulling and lazy pace, and between your several attempts of keeping yourself occupied (that being going on a walk to the library or going through your mom’s old recipe book) you actually catch yourself realizing the quietness can be louder than your roommates.
It’s a weird concept to you. Missing them when you spend so much time together in the band, but you still can’t help it. So you just blast the radio and let Rio fill in the empty walls as you wait for one of them to come home.
By the time the night falls, wind thumping on the closed windows as the first thin drops of rain start to hit the glass, Lena is back from her shift with a low huff and a roll of her eyes, mumbling how she’s never covering weekend shifts ever again -- which you both know is not true, but neither mention it. And that’s how you find yourself at the end of your unruffled day, tucked at the end of your couch under a cozy blanket. Listening to one of MTV’s nightly programs - that Lena watches almost religiously after a day of work - as background noise. You focus on the open book settled on top of your lap, enjoying her company quietly as you flip through the pages.
It could be the perfect ending for a perfectly relaxing day, the sound of the rain almost lulling you to sleep as the words in front of you begin to shuffle, finding it harder to concentrate with your mind drifting off.
But before you can let your eyes fall close and your head snuggle back into the cushions, you’re startled awake by the burst of your front door opening. The sudden noise makes you and Lena jump, a yelp leaving your lips as you look back to the source of your fright. 
You barely have any time to feel panicked or even wrap your head around the possibilities of what could have caused the outburst as Abbey barges into the room.  She all but jumps on each step, stumbling a bit as she makes her way around the couch to stand tall in front of you. Her red hair is full and damp, droplets of water running down her body, causing her clothes to stick to her skin.
“I got us a gig!” Her breath is short as if she just ran a long way.
“Christ, Abbey, don’t do that!” You relax back into the couch once you realize there’s no real threat invading your home, closing your eyes and letting out a breath. “Are you trying to give me a heart attack?”
She scoffs, “Did you listen to a word I just said?” You notice her eyes are blown out, “I got us a gig, as in a </i> real gig.”
“A real gig?” Lena inquires, standing up to walk towards the front door that was left agape, closing it with a thump.
Abbey’s grin grows, her words come out slow but clear. “Next Saturday in the Blue Bird.”
“That’s in a week.” You state.
Her shoulders drop, “Yeah, and?”
“Blue Bird?” Lena comes in the room again, stopping by the head of the couch and crossing her arms under her chest. “How did you even get that I thought the only band that played there was--”
“You’re right Lena, was as in not anymore because we are playing there, and there’s more.” She interrupts, her voice raising an octave. “The owner, Ronnie, said if we’re good enough he can arrange for us to play every other weekend.”
“You’re insane.” You shake your head slightly. “That’s like a place where people actually go for the music, what makes you think we can pull that off?”
Abbey points a finger at you, “You’re being a pessimist, and that’s not appreciated in here.” She waves her hands around, trying to assert her point. “We can and we will pull that off and take over the permanent spot on the weekends.”
“Is that what this is about?” Lena smirks, eyebrows raising at her friend. “It’s been a hot minute since you raged about that Harry boy.”
 “It’s not just about him, Adeline.” She barks, “It’s about us! We need to find our confidence again.”
 “Again?” You speak out, making her snap her eyes back at you.
“Yes, again.” She says, “We’re doing this and it’s gonna be wicked.”
You sigh, nodding in agreement as you exchange a knowing look with Lena.
In all fairness, the prospect of playing a gig at an actual music house is as exciting as it is scary. It’s not like you think you’re not able to pull it off, but the simple thought of having people actually paying attention to your presence on stage is enough to make you want to hide under your covers and never come out. But seeing Abbey so pumped about it, there’s no way in a million years you’d ever say no.
She was the one that wanted to start a band, after all. Before she dropped out, in what seems like ages ago, she was your roommate that would drag you around every time she had those spontaneous ideas, that is going out for pancakes at three in the morning, go on weekend trips to concerts two cities away, or, well, start a band herself.  
In the beginning, it was just the three of you, Abbey as the lead, you on the bass, and a girl you met on one of the said weekend trips, who had introduced herself as Lena, on the guitar. And not even a month later, you were all living together in a tiny house near the main street. 
At first, the biggest issue, to your surprises, was that you couldn’t find a drummer if your lives depended on it. Even after putting out posters around campus, you only got two calls from men whose only interest was the “all-girls band” part of it. Things got better when you met Jaz, a smiley girl from your Phonetics class. She wasn’t a drummer, but her boyfriend was, they both played for their High School band (which is how they met, a proper movie-worthy story if they’d ask you). And just like that, you got yourselves a drummer and a keyboardist.
For the next few months that followed you played on dirty bars and house parties, getting paid with tipsy pats on your backs, or, if you were lucky, maybe a pack of cheap drinks for you all to share. It’s the frustrating part of trying to get into the music path, you found, most serious places were not interested on a band with hardly any live experience and no original songs whatsoever. So you just had to take whatever opportunity came your way. Once, you even played on the birthday party of Lena’s manager’s daughter, which was probably the most disastrous experience of them all, considering a crowd of eight-year-olds and their posh moms weren’t exactly fond of listening to loud covers of Blondie. You got to play three full songs before one of them asked you to leave. 
The first time you actually got money was when Abbey dragged you and Lena to play on the sidewalk of the National Park, where people would come and go with their busy lives and full wallets. That was the best one, you easily got three hundred within a few hours of your open cases, which was split between the three of you at the end of the day.
Afterward, you wanted to play on the streets again, but Abbey wished more than just being a street performer, she yearned for the glow of the spotlights and a place on the stage. And it’s not like you lot didn’t think of it as well, how it would be like to have an actual gig. So, you just went back to the old routine of jumping from bar to bar.  Playing for people that couldn't care less about your presence on the small stage, focusing only on their cheap beers and drunk conversations. 
For a while it seemed like that was all there was to it, the music scene getting more congested by the minute, you thought there was no way you’d ever make it out there. There were moments you even thought about giving it up, if you were honest, setting your mind into getting your English degree that at least has the guarantee of a stable paycheck by the end of it. But as Abbey always says, there’s nothing you can’t do with a twist of your hair and a bat of your lashes. And somehow, she managed to be true to her word, presenting an opportunity to actually start taking this seriously.
And it would be a lie to say there isn’t an excitement growing at the pit of your stomach the more you think about it.
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You’ve heard about the Blue Bird before.
Of course you have, it’s near to impossible not to. Being in a small town, predominantly surrounded by uni students, and that being the only music pub in the area, you’ve heard about it quite often. 
It’s become quite the hot spot for people interested in listening to good music while getting lost in the bottom of their beer glasses. With the only other competitor being a good forty-minute drive away, people go in crowds on the weekends as a getaway from their textbooks. You’re not sure why you’ve never been in it, though, only going as far as walking past it on your nightly walks during the week, listening to the faint sound of whatever band’s playing at the time. 
But if there’s one thing that’s always brought up when the subject is the Blue Bird is CHASM, more specifically Harry Styles. They have the permanent spot on the weekends and have become one of the main reason people - women, mainly - come in lots to have a spot inside the packed space. 
As much as his name comes up in a dreamy sigh and followed by a string of giggles when you hear it being mentioned by a classmate or overhear it somewhere in public, inside of your bubble he’s pretty much only mentioned in annoyed huffs or with a roll of eyes. If you’re honest, you know close to nothing about him, wouldn’t even be able to point him out on the street if you ever happen to cross paths. But you do know that Abbey is not fond of him in the slightest, so for that, you try to keep your distance from anything that has to do with Harry Styles.
You’re not sure how this hatred of her came to be and to be honest, you’ve never really been bothered enough to ask. Abbey doesn’t like a lot of people, her first impression of them it’s what she keeps in her heart with zero to no chance of changing it, so you just assume this Harry guy might’ve not given her a good one. It’s never really been something you really dwelled on, the circumstances in your life allowing you to ignore his existence unless he’s being spoken of. But it feels like a whole nother story now that you’ve essentially stolen his golden spot on the saturday night. 
The moment you walk into The Blue Bird is when you start to come to the realization that this is really happening. Not even a full step in, your eyes already dart to the big stage standing tall across from the entrance door, bigger than any other one you’ve ever been in -- being used to small platforms that barely have enough space to fit a drumset. it’s hard not to let your lips part in awe at the size of it all, the outside is rather modest compared to it, the only really striking detail being the LED sign with the name of the pub. There’s a large bar standing in the middle of the place, serving almost as a divisor of the two areas of the pub. The first area is the one you walk into as you first enter the place, with tables surrounding the space -- that now have their chairs propped on top of them, and you reckon this is where people sit around as they wait for the musical act of afterward when they can barely keep themselves up on their feet. The second area, however, it’s just empty of any barrier, except from the stools lined in front of the bar, meant mainly for people to crowd in front of the stage.
The walls are what catches your attention, though. The one where the front door stands is covered with magazines and newspaper cutouts of celebrities, scandalous headlines written in big bold letters, and random articles about their personal lives. On top of this big collage, there are band posters, you assume the ones that played in here, most of them stuck once to the wall, except for one that you can see multiple different colored papers with the same name written on it. 
You stop in front of one of them, one that’s just below your eyesight but catches your attention with the big blood-red letters that read CHASM on top of it, with a smaller font on the side saying  “live every weekend of ‘87” right below it. What you focus on, however, are the five faces staring back at you, their serious expressions looking almost haunting with the black and white filter. But it’s the one in the middle that your eyes immediately dart to. Unlike his bandmates, his lips are frozen with a slight smirk, small enough that wandering eyes could easily miss it, but still prominent enough that you can make out the shadow of a dimple on his cheek. His hair is settled in a wild nest, but not in a sloppy way, you decide, they’re a rockstar kind of messy. He’s handsome, there’s no doubt in that, just by looking at the small print of his face you can understand what the fuss is about, not that you’d ever admit that out loud. But it doesn’t keep your mind from wondering the color of his eyes and what it would be like to see them up close, as you look back at the taunting grin you think what could be the tone of his lips or--
“Lost something in there?” Lena’s voice makes you jump, turning swiftly to find her grinning at you. “You should come and start getting everything ready before Abbey finds you admiring our arch-nemesis.”
Your eyes widen, coughing in surprise as you try to regain composure after being caught. “I-- I wasn’t--”
She chuckles, turning to roam back to the stage before you can finish, throwing you one last look over her shoulder. “Sure thing, buttercup.”
You spare one last look to the poster before following her lead to the other side of the room where the rest of your friends are setting up the instruments on top of the stage. Once you locate your case tucked in the far left corner you quickly open it, finding your soft pink tinted bass resting inside of it. The Sesame Street sparkling stickers stuck to it glimmer from this angle (you got them in a favor bag from when you played at the birthday party), thanks to one of the spotlights shining directly at them. You pick the instrument up, adjusting the strap over your shoulder and giving the chords a few experimental strokes before looking up at the empty place.
There’s no denial of the anticipation that takes over every part of your body at the sight of the pub from the stage. A perfect mixture of excitement and anxiousness that lights up as you imagine how it will be like to see it filled up. It makes you gnawn at you bottom lip, jumping a bit on you feet as you move to connect your bass to the amplifier.
For a while, you just finish setting up the stage, tuning in the instruments, the sounds echoing on the empty space in a bit of a disarray, as you get used to the feeling of using proper sound equipment. You had the chance to meet the owner, Ronnie, for a brief minute as he strolled around the stage, observing you all before mumbling something about paying anything you broke and announcing he’d be in his office until opening hours. It wasn’t the warmest greeting you’ll admit, but you don’t really care, enjoying the opportunity nevertheless. 
Abbey arrives just a few minutes before the rehearsal is set to start, contemplating the view of everyone getting into a more of a harmonic arrangement before disappearing backstage for a moment without saying much of a word. When she comes back, she props herself in front of a big curved mirror cutting through one of the walls.
“Do you think you can do my makeup today, babe?” She calls back at you, gazing from over her shoulder with a slight pout on her ips.
“Sure.” You fiddle with the guitar pick between your fingers. “Do you want that rainbow look from last time?”
“Maybe something with less color this time.” She focuses back on her reflection, sighing loudly as fingers run through her locks. “I’m thinking of dying my hair black,” she tilts her head as if she’s envisioning her words. “I don’t know, just to try out something new.”
“That won’t make you look more like Joan Jett, you know.” A voice echoes in the empty space, bringing your attention to the entrance of the place.
And there he stands. The figure you had been staring at not long before, on the same poster stuck right behind where he is leaning, arms crossed and a smug look on his face. 
Harry stands there as if he just walked right out of the big screen, is the kind of beautiful you don’t see quite often outside a magazine cover. Not that it’s something that surprises you, considering you could tell from even a poorly printed image on a poster that the sharp curve of his jaw and the cut of his cheekbones could call anyone’s attention from afar. Even with what you find to be a rather plain outfit for someone like him, a simple white turtleneck tucked in his lightwash jeans, matched with a denim jacket, he still manages to stand out somehow. It’s almost compelling, really. And you can’t help but follow him with your eyes as he pushes himself off the wall, making his way towards the bar with an attitude as if he owns the place.
Abbey scoffs from her spot, arms crossing under her chest. “Unlike you, I don’t have to try to be someone else to get attention, Styles.”
He rests an elbow on top of the counter, chuckling as he points a finger at your friend. “You’re getting better at this, I’m proud.”
“What the fuck are you even doing here?” She barks, keeping a stern look pointed at him.
“Wanted to check out who stole our Saturday night spot, princess.” He spits back at her, words dancing around the room in a teasing manner. “When Ronnie said it was a bunch of newbies had to see it with my own eyes.” Unlike her, he doesn’t seem bitter at the situation in hand, but somewhat amused at the heated girl scoffing at him. From the distance you stand, you can’t make out details, but it’s still enough to notice the grin imprinted on his face, dimples marking his cheeks as he clenches his jaw, eyes wandering around the stage as he leans back fully to rest both elbows on top of the stool. “Plus, I get free booze before the House opens.”
As the words leave his lips his eyes meet yours, and you quickly realize you must’ve been staring for quite a while. You see the smirk growing on his face before you quickly look back at the forgotten bass in your hands. There’s a warmth creeping from your neck to the tip of your ears from getting caught all but gawking at him. You move your hands to the cords, beginning to tune the instrument as an attempt to cover-up. But when you take a peek at him you still find his eyes watching you, only enhancing the blush that’s now undoubtedly taking over your cheeks.
“You lot are way more organized than I expected.” He speaks up again, motioning towards Ross sitting by the side of the stage near the drumset.  “Got a roadie and everything.”
“Piss off!” Ross snarls back at him.
Harry just smiles. “Just taking a piss, mate.”
“I better not see you going around trying to get to one of my girls, Styles.” Abbey calls back from her shoulder as she jumps onto the stage, turning to face him. “Or you’re a dead man.”
“What’s that they can’t speak for themselves?” He arches his brows at her. “Where’s all that sexual freedom you love to brag about?”
“You’d love to use that as an excuse, wouldn’t you?” She toys with the mic stand. “You stay away from them.”
There’s no more banter once you begin the rehearsal. Harry grabbing a glass of a drink you can’t quite make out from the distance and moves to a spot tucked by the back of the place. Curiously, you catch yourself glimpsing in his direction every so often, but you can barely make out his silhouette due to the stage lights limiting your vision. At one point, when it dims down, you can see him scrunching over the table, focusing on a small journal sitting on top of it -- you find it odd his choice of place to do so, but don’t duel on it too much.
What keeps crawling back into your mind is Abbey’s words to Harry earlier, telling him to not try his way with any of you. She was talking about you. That much was clear, considering there’s not any other choice for him, with Jaz being very much compromised and Lena having no interest in engaging with men in any way. That leaves you as the only option that he could possibly pursue. It makes you think why she’d even consider that a possibility in the first place, but you push it to the back of your mind, concentrating on you bass lines until it’s around the opening hour and you’re getting ready backstage.
None of you are used to the concept of having a dressing room, so as undusted as it seems from a first glance, it still only helps to enhance the reality that hits you of this whole experience. The far voices from people starting to fill in the bar outside making your nerves become near overwhelming as you try to apply some eyeshadow with shaky hands. 
When you’re all ready to go, just about half an hour away from walking onstage, you try to dull your anxiety with a cup handed to you by Lena of something you’re not quite sure what it is but it tastes like oranges and tequila. You settle on a spot on the certainly old red couch prompted against the wall. Avoiding a big rip cutting through the middle of it, foam poking out of the hole, you try not to think of what could’ve caused it -- or all the other stains adorning it. 
There’s people coming and going around the space, the door not staying close for longer than a minute. Faster than you can process it, the room is suddenly crammed with people, none of which you recognize yet they greet you as if you’d been friends your whole life. Their loud voices mesh together, making it harder to even hear your own voice if you were to speak out loud. A strong scent of incense takes over the room, so intense you can feel the beginning of a headache. There are people stumbling on their feet trying to get to the stool across from you, where you catch a glimpse of a man with a messy mohawk snorting something out of a dirty bill. 
Two strangers found their sits next to you at some point - not paying the same attention you had to the rip scarring through the cushions. Both get lost in their conversation, the man’s fluffed curls poking your face occasionally when he gets too excited with the hand gestures. You catch a word or two when they try to include you in it, you offer a simple nod, not bothering to try and understand their muddled words.
It all starts to feel a bit overwhelming, the amount of strangers surrounding you along with the nervous feeling that’s already taking over your stomach -- the drink not being of any help at all. You look around trying to find a familiar face, but you can barely spot the green ends of Lena’s hair through the crowd. Gazing down at your wrist clock, you figure there’s enough time for you to find a emptier spot so you can calm yourself down.
“I think I’m gonna get some air.” You say to no one in particular, seeing the man’s head nodding from your peripheral vision as you maneuver your way between leather-clad bodies towards the door.
You’re met with a just as packed hallway. Searching for a more vacant space, you spot a sign indicating an exit door that had been pointed at you earlier as the back alleyway. Without a second thought, you make your way around the crowded space. The nest of feet makes you trip slightly, making you crash against a girl standing next to the door. You mutter a quick apology, but you’re only met with a pitched giggle in response.
Once you reach the door you all but jolt your way out of the building. The brisk night air hitting your face, bringing a sense of relief near to instantly. You close your eyes at the feeling, breathing in as the breeze dances around your face and messes with your air.
“Well, if it’s not one of Abigail’s bunnies.” A voice cuts through the air, breaking you from your moment of relief. Your eyes flutter open, meeting Harry’s irises watching you. He’s leaning back on the wall across from you, foot prompt up and jacket thrown over his shoulders. His fingers fiddle with a closed package of cigarettes, dimples shadowing on his face in amusement.
You blink at him, taking a second to process his words. “I’m not a bunny, whatever that means.”
His lips twitch up. “I’m sure you’re not, darling.”
You observe as he thumbs the package in hand open, quickly grabbing a cigarette and resting it between his lips. “Need a light for that?”
His brows shoot up. “Didn’t take you for a smoker, angel.”
“I’m not, my friends are.” You reach for the back pocket of your jeans, pulling out a tiny pink lighter and throwing it towards him.
He catches it, holding it up between his index and middle finger. “You carry that around for your friends?” He keeps his eyes trained on you as he raises the lighter, flicking it so it paints the end of the cigarette a fiery orange. You can’t help but notice the chipped black nail polish adorning his nails, a couple of rings hugging his fingers, only adding to his rockstar persona. His cheeks hollow around it, taking a slow drag exhaling smooth puffs of smoke out of his puckered lips. He points the end of the cigarette towards you. “That’s a good girl.”
You feel your breath hitch on your throat, looking down as you feel for the second time in the day a heat taking over your cheeks. Standing awkwardly in the middle of the alleyway, your gaze waves around checking a few other lone smokers not too far from you. When you peek at him again, he’s still watching you with the same smug look he had when he first walked in. From this distance you can get a better look at his face, with it’s full colors, and you make a point to figure the forest green of his eyes flickering under the dim light. 
You clear your throat, trying to fill in the silence that’s taken over the space. Keeping your eyes still trained on a random spot where the alley meets the street, you speak up,  “So, how did get a gig here?”
“Trying to get to know me now, love?” There’s a smug tone to his voice, and it makes you shoot your eyes at him.
You shake your head, scoffing softly. “Was trying to be nice, forget it.”
He lets the air fall quiet for a beat, the corner of his lips tugging up as he takes another drag of the cigarette. “My uncle owns the place.”
“Ronnie is your uncle?” You crease your eyebrows.
“Yup.” He props his foot down from the wall, kicking a small rock on the floor. “He’s a right prick, but he can be nice if you get on his soft spot.” He shrugs, eyes meeting yours. “What ‘bout you, bunny?”
 “What about me?”
“How did you get in the spotlight?”
You breathe out a laugh, shaking your head. “I’m not in the spotlight,” 
“You’re stepping on that stage in a few minutes, love, that’s hardly true.”
You chew on your lip, locking your eyes on your feet as you sway back and forth gently. “But I’m, like, on the invisible side of the stage.”
“Invisible side?” 
You shrug, trying to appear unflappable. “Yeah, well, no one ever notices the bassist.”
“I do.” He says without skipping a beat, and when you search for his eyes they’re aloof as if the words just left his lips without a single implication behind them. You wonder if there is one. Or maybe you’re just reading too much into it. Nonetheless, it doesn’t stop a flock of butterflies to sweep on your stomach as he shoots you a warm smile. He motions to the door behind you with his head, “Better get going, darling, if someone spots us talking they might think we’re friends.”
                                 ❁         ❁        ❁ 
“Did you see how crazy they went when we did Call Me?” Abbey leans over the table, not paying any mind to the way it starts to tilt towards her side. You and Jaz quickly balance the weight, straightening surface before the filled cups can start sliding down and causing a mess. You give her a scolding look for not being careful, but she doesn’t even look at you, only picking a fry from the pile in the middle and dipping inside her vanilla milkshake, sitting back and elbowing Lena next to her playfully. “And to think you said it’s not a gig song.”
“I didn’t say that.” Lena shakes the cup in her hand, circling the straw as to mix the melting ice cream inside, completely unfazed by her friend’s tease. “Just said we should do something new if people wanted old songs they would tune on that good times radio station, or whatever it’s called.”
“People like listening to classics!” Abbey protests, raising her voice bit, she’s either forgotten she’s in public or is just simply too stoned to care. Either way, you try to shush her, muffling a giggle with the back of your hand as you see a group two tables down looking back at her. She only huffs, leaning back down on her seat, “What do you suggest we play, then? Duran Duran?”
“I like Duran Duran.” You pester, trying to repress a smile as she shoots you a pointed look.
“I actually think Duran Duran is a great idea.” Lena backs you up, the same taunting smile reflecting on her face as she says it looking at you. 
“You two are completely insane if you think I’m singing new wave, might as well start to fill in for a new vocalist.” She shoves her hand full of fries, dropping to her side of the table with a shrug.
“Jaz you think that girl from your choir is available? The blonde one?” Lena bites into her straw, barely containing her laugh as Abbey narrows her eyes at her.
You watch in amusement from across the table, the contrast between Lena and Abbey looking comical as they continue to banter at each other. In one side there’s Lena who’s leaning back on the wall next to her, her neon pink jumpsuit standing out from anyone else in your group, hair hardly styled, being more of a nest in her head, the sides shaved and the back falling on her shoulders in a mullet. On the other side, Abbey’s swallowed in black, the only color being the red of her hair, that’s pushed up in a high side ponytail.
It was her idea to come to the diner after the gig, declining every offer of an after party (which is new for her) and insisting you had to have this moment to decompress together as a band. What you didn’t take account of, is that a diner on a Saturday night isn’t exactly a deserted place. So after spending an hour sitting on the parking lot, waiting for a table, you finally got yourselves a booth tucked by the back. And now as the place gets clearer and quieter by the minute, after getting your round of burgers, you share a big pile of fries, not ready to leave and sleep on this experience just yet.
“You know who also seem to enjoy the show? That Harry dude.” The mention of his name calls your attention to Lena. “Caught him in the corner a couple times watching us.”
You take a sip of his drink, trying to mask any expression that exposes the fact that you’d noticed too, maybe more than just a couple times.
To your relief, everyone focuses on Abbey as she lets out an annoyed huff. “Why’d you bring him up of all people.” She picks up her nearly empty cup a bit too harshly, her voice rising again. “He called me a Joan Jett wannabe! Fucking prick.”
 “You do dress like her,” Lena raises her brows in defiance.
“It’s called an inspiration, Adeline, doesn’t mean I’m trying to be her.” She barks at her friend. “Doesn’t give that knobhead the right to be a dick about it.”
“Why don’t you like him?” The question slips out of your lips before you can stop it, and you regret it as soon as all eyes on the table set on you, Abbey’s face creasing in an incredulous look as if the answer was obvious.
 “Are you serious? Did you hear how he spoke to us?”
“I don’t know,” You shrug, looking down at your lap, fiddling with the hem of your shorts. “Just seemed like he was trying to get a rise out of you.”
“He’s got a stick up his ass, babe. A full narcissist, it’s ridiculous.” She shakes her head, scrunching her nose in aversion. “He’s also a complete womanizer, it’s disgusting if you ask me.”
“I guess,” You gaze up at her.”
“Babe, he’s a charmer, I’ve seen it before, he knows how to sweet talk someone.” She explains in a sigh. “They’re all like that.”
“They?”
“Men in bands.” She picks up another fry, poking it on her forehead as she makes her point. “Have their heads bigger than the whole stage, think they can do just about anything.”
“Suppose that’s true,” You agree, not wanting to get further in this discussion.
She smiles, biting a piece of the fry before pointing it at you. “It is, which is why we are smart girls and don’t fuck with them.”
                                 ❁         ❁        ❁
You’re aware that going for a walk by yourself at night is not a very secure choice. 
Even living in what you feel like could be the most monotone town in the area (where the biggest report on the local news was when two boys got stuck on a tree thanks to a dare with their friends). But it still doesn’t stop you from being careful, only going around the busier streets, watching the movement of people - mostly students - chatting the night away on the filled pub table, enjoying the short break between studies before going back at it once the weekend’s over. 
You stroll around with not much of a purpose, really, only needing a bit of time to yourself every so often when you feel the turmoil in your home becomes to much (on those weekends when both your roommates decide to stay home). So you just go on your usual path, breathing in the night air and enjoying some alone time.
The ending of your course is marked by none other than the Blue Bird, standing in a corner of the main street.
 A small group of people is gathered in front of it, smoking their cigarettes. You stare at them for a minute as you get closer to the led lights indicating the entrance of the pub, the girls with their bright-colored outfits, hair styled and puffed up as they laugh along to whatever one of the boys has said. One of them has a leather jacket thrown over her shoulder that almost swallows her figure, and you can only assume that it belongs to the man talking to her, leaning back on a payphone, the quiff in his hair so high it makes him look like a knock-off John Travolta. The thought makes you breathe out a laugh to yourself.
Once you reach the entrance you look at it mindlessly, not being able to see much from outside except the string curtain hanged on top of the open door. You turn on your heels, ready to start making your way back, but as you pay attention to the muffled sounds coming from inside the pub you stop on your tracks. A familiar tune catching your attention, making you turn in the direction of the entry. Somebody to Love. 
It peaks your curiosity. If you’re honest, you feel like covering a Queen song is probably one of the most bound for disaster decisions someone can make. But as you feel yourself approaching the entrance, the voice of whoever’s singing it all but lures you inside. It’s not the same as the original, of course, but the lower tone to it fits it just as beautifully and once you fully walk in you can almost feel your heart skip a beat to find Harry standing on stage. His eyes closed in concentration. 
It’s saturday. His saturday night. You forgot about that.
You don’t dare to try to mend amongst the crowd of people packed in front of the stage, making your way to the bar. You thankfully find an empty stool without much of a fight, allowing you a perfect vision of the stage.
Harry is playing the guitar, his voice blending perfectly with the vocals of the girls in the background, eyes closed as he feels every lyric coming out of his throat. His stage look is much different than the one he wore back when you first saw him, it’s something you reckon not many people could rock out as good as he does. A mismatched suit, light green blazer with a pink blouse underneath, along with bright blue trousers -- it’s as if he picked one piece from different colored suits (which you assume he probably did). The locks of his hair are no longer running wild on his head, instead, it’s gelled back, a single rebel strand falling charmingly against his forehead. You wonder if it’s on purpose.
It’s quite a sight to see him like this, you’re not gonna lie. All suited up with no tie, the blouse only partially buttoned so you notice a tease of some tattoos on his chest. You’d noticed his good looks before, it’s impossible not to, but there’s something about the stage glow that makes it impossible to look away from him. It’s mesmerizing.
To your surprise, the rest of his set mainly consists of originals, and unlike you’d expect for any amateur band that dares to sweep away from covers, he manages to hold the crowd’s attention as if he’s singing any other hit song you hear on the radio. Even not knowing the lyrics, people cheer along to the songs, moving to the beat as best as they can in the crowded space. And that’s a direct result of the charisma he holds while standing on stage.
It’s entrancing, really, how he holds himself as if he was born to be doing this. And you think maybe he was. 
There’s a mischievous glow to him, when he rocks out to his own songs, grinding slightly against the mic stand. A gesture that makes you flustered even from your seat a couple of meters away. You couldn’t keep your eyes off of him even if you tried. And you’re sure as hell not trying.
At one point you feel a poke in your arm, turning around to be met with the barman who recognizes you from the week prior. He greets you with a shout over the noise, offering you a drink on his account. Your first instinct is to refuse, considering you weren’t even supposed to stay for long, but after a bit of insisting on his part you accept with a shy smile.
By the time he’s ending the last song, you’re at the edge of your seat, catching yourself wishing you could see more of him. The lights in the audience turn on as he wraps up the set, and just before he bows down with the rest of his band his eyes wander in your direction. It’s so quickly that you think you could���ve just imagined it, considering his eyes don’t meet yours again, only rushing his way backstage.
You blink at the empty spot where he once stood for a moment, almost feeling frozen in place as you try to take in what happened. Turning on your stool to face the bar, you gaze down at your forgotten drink. You hold it to your lips, deciding to finish it so you can ease your way out before anyone else spots you. Your attempt is frustrated, however, when you hear a voice coming from behind you.
“Reckon Abbey Road would throw a fit if she knew you’re wandering around watching my concert.” You turn to face Harry, finding him looking down at you, signature smirk making his dimples poke onto his cheeks. His hands are hidden inside the pockets of his dress pants and he’s taken off his blazer, causing the pink of his blouse to stand out even more.
You chew the inside of your lip. “I can make my own decisions, you know.”
“That’s good to hear, bunny.” His smile grows, hand leaving the pocket to motion at the empty spot next to you. “Mind if I sit here?”
“Be my guest.”
He sits on the empty stool, turning to the bartender that’s handing a drink to a man standing behind you. “Can you give the lady another one of what she was drinking? On my tab.”
“Oh you don’t have to, I was about to--” You begin, but the man behind the counter doesn’t care to listen, only picking up your empty glass and moving away to fill it up. “leave.”
“Already?” Harry arches his eyebrows, resting his arm on top of the counter and leaning towards you. His voice comes out a bit softer, dropping the playful tone, “let me buy you a drink, angel.”
You ignore the way the hairs on your neck rise at the petname. “You really don’t have to--”
“I want to.”
“Okay.” You breathe out, not being able to hold back your smile once his own grows on his face.
As if on cue, the bartender comes back with two glasses, setting them in front of the two of you. You don’t fail to note the fact that he gives Harry his drink without being asked to.
He picks up his glass, holding it up, to which you do the same, clinking your glasses slightly before taking a sip.  “So, what brings you here tonight? Measuring the competition?”
 “I was just walking around, heard a lousy cover of Somebody To Love, and decided to come in.”
He throws his head back a bit in laughter, nose scrunching adorably. You have to look away as to not find yourself staring. “A Queen fan, then?”
 “You could say so.”
“A pretty girl with a good taste in music, gonna steal m’heart if you keep going, bunny.” And just like that, it’s like he takes all the words out of your mind. You only let out a small chuckle, taking a sip of your drink as you look away to cove the blush that paints your cheeks. His eyes are still trained on you, though. “Was it any good?”
“Huh?” You blink back at him.
“The cover.” He grins. “Or was it really that lousy?”
“Oh, it was amazing.” You say truthfully, clearing your throat. “You have a beautiful voice.”
“Thank you.” He bows his head slightly, smiling at you. And unlike before, it’s not smug, but rather warm, you smile back at him. “Enjoyed the show, then?”
“I did.” You nod.
“I’m glad.” He runs his finger around the brim of his glass, tapping against it once with a click of his ring against the glass.  “What would you change about it?”
The question takes you back. “What would I change?” 
 “Yeah.” He clasps his hands over his lap, moving his feet on the floor so his stool swivels from one side to the other.
“Uhm…” You crease your brows, trying to hack your brain for an answer. Your eyes land on his blouse, still halfway unbuttoned. “Your shirt.”
“M’shirt?” He questions, brows shooting towards his hairline, clearly not expecting the answer. He gazes down at the piece on his body, fingers pitching the material as he looks back at you. “What’s wrong with it?”
“Not a big fan of pink.” You shrug.
“Now, we just can’t have that, bunny.” He clicks his tongue. “Pink is the new color of rock n roll!”
You chuckle. “Says who?”
“Says me.”
You roll your eyes playfully. “Oh, I’m sorry then, mister rockstar.”
His face lights up in a giggle, lips parting to say something but before he can let the words out a hand rests on his shoulder calling both your attentions to the man standing next to him. You recognize him from standing next to Harry on stage as the guitar player.
“We’re hopping over to Eamon’s.” He doesn’t acknowledge you until Harry’s eyes hover over in your direction. 
“That’s fine, think I’ll stay behind this time.” Harry looks back at his friend, but you see him glimpsing at you from the corner of his eyes.
You watch as his friend raises his brows, gazing between the two of you in a curious manner. You clear your throat, shifting in your seat as you look at them. “ It’s fine, I should get going anyway.”
“You don’t have to,” he says in a blink, a smirk twitching on his lips almost as if to cover up how quickly he said it. He turns back to his friend, who’s still watching the interaction with raised eyebrows.  “You can go without me, I’ll see you all tomorrow.”
“Harry, you didn’t have to.” You subconsciously reach for his arm, retracting your touch just as fast when he glances at it. Clearing your throat, you play with “I really should get going, I was supposed to be on a walk after all.”
“Let me walk you back then,” he gets up from his stool, giving his friend a brief hug before turning back to you and extending his hand for you to take. Your lips part to protest, feeling as if you’re holding him back even though it was his decision to stay behind, but before the words can even come out of your mouth he beats you to it,  “there’s no way I’m letting you go home by yourself this late, love.”
You sigh, shoulder dropping in defeat as you hold back a smile. Taking his hand, you stand up, “okay.”
The main street hasn’t exactly quieted down since you first walked by it, in fact, it only seems like it’s gotten rowdier. Time only increasing the buzz wandering in the air around the people filling the bars, voices louder, filled glasses clinking more frequently. As you stroll through it side by side there’s a comment or to that floats in the air, but you have to all but shout it, fighting with the turmoil of noise.
As soon as you turn into the first street away from the crowds it’s as if someone had turned off the sound completely, the nest of voices getting far-off in the distance and the loudest sound being of the night breeze kissing the tree branches above you. You can feel Harry glancing up at you from the corner of your eye and it doesn’t take long until his voice echoes in the air in an attempt to make small talk.
It’s surprising to you, how easy it is to be drawn in a conversation with him. Harry’s essentially not the same offstage as he is under the spotlight, most people aren’t. There’s no need for him to bloat his charisma when talking to you, he’s quieter. Shy, almost. And it takes you back a bit, to see such contrast in a short amount of time. 
The magnetic force to him, however, still lingers even when he’s like this. You feel drawn to it, wanting to hear him speak about everything that comes to mind, just to savor the way he articulates his words, voice so calm and low it sends an electric chill down your spine. As he tells you about his music inspirations, going on the story about the time he traveled alone to crash a Fleetwood Mac concert, hands brushing against yours when he walks, you catch yourself wondering what it would feel like to link them together.
Once you reach your street, just a block away from the entrance gate of your home, you notice the front lights are yet to be turned off, indicating your roommates are still up and around -- most likely arguing about MTV’s top ten of the week. The realization makes you come to an abrupt stop, catching Harry off guard as he takes a few steps before realizing you stayed behind. 
“Wait.” You say once he turns around, brows furrowed in a silent question as to why you stopped. “Uhm… You can drop me off here… It’s fine.”
“What do you mean? Is it too far? I don’t mind walking-”
“No!” You interrupt. “It’s not that, my house is right there, see?” You point to the bricked building no too far from where you stand.
“Why do y’want me to drop you off here, then?” The crease on his face deepens.
“I-- it’s just--” you begin, not knowing how to say it. “It’s just the girls are still awake, and..”
“Ah,” he clicks his tongue, an amused grin expanding on his cheeks. “Don’t wanna get scolded for hanging out with the enemy.”
“Don’t say like that.” You chuckle at yourself, looking down in embarrassment. “They just will never let me hear the end of it.”
“I get it, bunny.” He takes easy steps towards you, closing the space as he stands tall in front of you. You hold your breath as you look up at him, meeting his irises glimmering in enjoyment, dimples shadowing on his cheek. His hand reaches up, moving a strand of your hair behind your ear and you swear if he gets any closer he’ll be able to hear your heart thumping in anticipation. “Had a lovely time with you.”
“Me, uhm--” you clear your throat as your voice cracks, blood flooding your cheeks. “Me too.”
The streetlight above gives his face a golden glow that almost takes your breath away, his hair glistening in the light due to the gel pushing it back, and now even more rebel strands curl against his forehead. You half expect him to lean down, you don’t know why he would, but for a moment it seems like he will. To your dismay, however, he steps back, giving you one last smile before moving out of your way on the sidewalk. “I’ll see you around, then.”
                                 ❁         ❁        ❁ 
“I have some exciting news for you.”
Abbey’s voice startles you, not realizing she’d entered the dressing room while you focused on the book on your lap. Since you’ve gotten a spot at every other weekend on the pub, your routine just seemed to get even more busy, with rehearsals almost every day. So, because of that you barely find time to do your assignments. And with a book report due just around the corner, you’d thought maybe you could sneak in some reading time after the gig when everyone’s down at the bar and not prancing and screaming around the dressing room.
 Your assumptions shows itself to be wrong, however, when your perky friend bounces her way to where you sit. She kneels next to the couch, crossing her arms on top of your legs and resting her chin on them, looking up at you expectantly, lips lifted in a side grin. 
“What is it?”
“Got us an after-party, babe.” you notice a few colored lollies in her hand when she removes the plastic protecting a red one, shoving it between your lips before you can even protest. “And you’re coming with us.”
“I’d love to but I have class tom—“ Your voice is muffled around the sweet. 
She rolls her eyes, standing to sit next to you on the arm of the couch. “You should stop wasting your life with an outdated system” 
“You mean getting a degree?” 
“Do you watch the news? We’re about to be the last generation to live fully, the world is about to break into nuclear wars all around.” She says as a matter-of-fact, turning to rest her legs on top of your lap. “Cosmo said we probably won’t even make it to the 2000s” 
“Who’s Cosmo?” 
She sighs, reaching to move a strand of your hair behind your ear. Her voice comes out soft, but calculated, “what matters is that we should enjoy our time while we have it.” 
“You’re giving a whole speech about nuclear war to convince me to go to a party with you.” You arch your brows at her. 
“Yes.” 
You sigh, shoulders falling in defeat as you let yourself be convinced. “Okay. But I’ll—” 
“Great!!” She squeals, moving her legs from your lap and leaning down to grab your face, pressing a quick kiss on top of your hair before jumping from the couch, and out of the room. 
Once you arrive at the location of the after-party, Abbey leads you and Lena to a tall gate by the side of the house, explaining that you’re walking in from the back garden, considering the front door is locked. You find it odd, and if wasn’t for the muted sound of instruments echoing inside the bricked walls of the place, you’d doubt there was even a party happening here at all. The front of it was as regular as the other surrounding suburbian homes, grass neatly trimmed and the front lights turned off, as if nobody was even home.
Which is why you’re visibly taken back when you walk by the gate into the back area, finding an old vintage bus that could be around ten or even twenty years old, sitting in the middle of the grass. The wheels of it have been taken off, and every inch of the exterior is covered by graffiti, so much you couldn’t even make out the original color of it if you tried. Some of them are unreadable scribbles tangling on top of each other. Some are colorful drawings painted over them -- two sunflowers catch your attention, marked just above where the wheel would be, growing tall along the side and above the window.
“I know, right?” Abbey nods at your astounded expression. “Legend says John Lennon signed it somewhere.”
“Really?” You look at her, not able to hold back the way your voice pitches in amazement.
“Dunno, never looked for it.” She shrugs. “C’mon I’ll show you.”
She grabs your hand, dragging you to the side of the vehicle pointing at some random drawings and explaining the rumors behind their meanings. You try to concentrate on her excited babbles, but as you see Lena walking away from the corner of your eye you look up to watch her meet with a girl you’ve never seen. Before you can focus back on your friend, something else catches your attention, sitting on a wooden bench under a large tree, no too far from where you stand.
Harry’s in a small group sat in a circle. You recognize two men from his band sitting on the grass with guitars propped on their laps, one being the same that interrupted you the night at the bar. The rest are women who seem to have come right out of Fleetwood Mac’s tour bus, their long hairs pushed back with hairbands and earthtoned flare pants. But you barely even care about the ones sitting on the grass, humming along to the strings of the guitars. What grabs your attention is the one next to harry on the bench, her arm draped over his shoulder as she dabbles flower petals playfully on his hair. 
You hardly take in his appearance, half-mindedly noticing the tattoos decorating his arms that pokes out of his tank top and the twirls on his hair as the girl winds her fingers on it. it’s hard not to remember Abbey’s words when she said he knows how to sweet talk his way around, and the thought of having fallen down on his trap only makes your heart pang on your chest. 
“-- That’s basically why they won’t let anyone paint over it anymore.” You turn back to Abbey as she points to the sunflowers you’d spotted earlier, nodding along as if you’d heard everything she said. She looks at you, “but I like this way better, don’t you think?” 
“Yeah.” You agree, not exactly knowing what to.  
She wraps her arm around yours, and you grasp the minty scent of her perfume as she pulls you close. “Let’s go inside.” 
There’s an urge inside of you to peek back over your shoulder to catch a last glimpse of Harry, but you push it to the back of your mind, allowing Abbey to guide you around the bus where the entrance door is hanging open. 
A small group of people greet you inside the bus, amongst them is the said ‘Cosmo’.  He seems like the exact kind of person you’d imagine Abbey hanging around on her weekends’ escapades. Dressed in a baby blue velvet suit with nothing underneath his blazer except a few of - what you assume - hand-painted tattoos, matching with a rainbow stripe drawn on the side of his face, starting at the bridge of his nose and going all the way to the curve of his jaw. His hair hits just around his shoulders, the sides shaved so it’s like a puffed version of a mullet, edges dyed in a bright shade of red. He toys with a lit joint between his purple lips, picking it up and offering to you with a raise of his brows.
Normally you’d decline the offer, especially coming from someone you’d just met, but there’s an annoying feeling settling itself at the pit of your stomach. One you want to ignore but can only do so much to dull it, so you accept the joint, reaching for it and placing it in your mouth. 
You’re not a regular smoker by any means, and when you inhale you can feel the smoke burning your throat as it moves down to curl inside your lungs. It makes you want to cough it out but you hold it in, trying to take in everything before huffing it out in a choked breath.
“Do you want a drink?” One of the girls asks you, already pouring you a purple drink inside a labeless plastic bottle.
“What’s in this?” You accept the cup, giving her an skeptic look.
“Pure fuel, babe.” Abbey leans on your shoulder from behind.
You hang out in the bus for a while, and, to your surprise, you don’t feel left out as they keep notice to include you in their conversations. The drink ends up being not that bad, and, even having no idea what’s in it except for the very artificial citric taste mixed with some very strong cheap alcohol, you still refill your cup after you finish it. 
It’s a nice feeling, to get a bit looser in a party and allowing yourself to have some adventurous fun. And as time goes by and your mind gets cloudier, the group starts to disperse. Two of them find a spot in the back with as much privacy as they could get in a party to swallow each others faces. Another one passes out in one of the seats behind you, hugging the empty plastic bottle as if it’d run away from them. It leaves just Abbey and Cosmo with you, discussing with each other about something that you’ve stopped paying attention a long while ago.
You just watch them silently, resting your head back on the seat and feeling the late hours weightening on your eyelids. You feel like you could doze off at any moment, but what stops you from it is a loud screeching sound of an amplifier from inside the house. It startles you, making you jump slightly on your seat as you hear a voice speaking almost like a groan, and you’re not sure if it’s your drunken mind or the inaudible words but you can’t make out a single thing that’s being said. A crease deepens between your eyebrows and you turn to question your friend about it but, before you can do so what seems like the most obnoxious cover of  We Built This City starts playing.
Abbey gasps as the chords of the song somehow get even louder, grasping her hand on the man’s arm. “Oh my god!” She squeals, exchanging a look with Cosmo as they both all but jump from their seats. She glances down at you, “We’re going in, are you coming?”
You raise your brows at her, trying to hide the scrunch on your face. “I’m good.”
She nods, making her way out of the bus, her feet stumbling on each other as she holds onto her friend’s shoulder to keep her balance. And just like that, you’re left alone on the leather seat.
You peek at the couple in the back, eyes bulging slightly as you see the girl has lost her shirt, the boy’s hands caress her chest as they keep their lips locked harshly. Deciding to give them a bit more privacy, you make your way out of the bus as well, the contrast from the compact air inside the vehicle to the crisp wind of the outdoors sending chills down your body.
Looking around, you realize most people hanging around are gone, probably gone inside the house. You can’t help but let your eyes wander to the spot you’d seen Harry earlier, and you don’t hold back the shock in your face when you find him still sitting on the bench, but this time with no one else around him. He fiddles with a lighter on his hand, flickering every so often to watch the weak flame before letting it die again. 
Your feet start to move before you can really grasp that you’re walking towards him, your head still a bit cloudy from the substances in your bloodstream. He looks up once you get close to him, signature smirk growing on his lips as he glances up at you.
“Look what we have here.” He leans back, “a lost bunny.” 
“Hi, Harry.” You say simply.
His smile turns a bit softer. “Where are your bandmates?”
“Celebrating.” You shrug.
“Shouldn’t you be as well?”
“I am.” You hold up the mostly empty red cup.
He chuckles. “I see, having fun by yourself then?”
You focus on a spot beyond his head, suddenly feeling timid under his gaze. “Seems like it.”
“Want to join my private party here?” He shifts to his side, patting the spot next to him. “S’very exclusive, as you can see.”
“Well, I’m honored to be invited, then.” You sit down on the space he made for you.
For a moment, there’s a silence between the two of you, the only sound being the jarring cover of  Everybody Wants to Rule The World. The notes of it are so off that you can’t help but huff a relieved breath when it comes to an end, enjoying the few seconds of silence before they begin another song. 
A small groan leaves your lips when the noise starts again, catching Harry’s attention as you feel his eyes land on the side of your face. “It should be illegal to ruin great songs like this.” You shake your head to yourself, speaking your thoughts out loud in a rush of confidence. “They should get arrested for it.”
He chuckles. “You’re not wrong.”
Your eyes dart at him, meeting his. It’s hard to miss the way his irises glimmer under the moonlight. When he glances down at the lighter still in his hands you take the opportunity to really have a look at him. The proximity makes you aware of a small constellation of freckles kissing his nose, and the stubble starting to poke out the skin along his jawline. You want to blame the haziness in your mind for the thoughts of how it would feel like to have it scratching against your skin. Or how it would feel under your lips as you nibble your way all the way to his rosy lips. You want to push these away, belittle them as nothing but drunken thoughts. But you know very well it wouldn’t be the first time you’ve let yourself be entertained by them.
A pitched scream takes you out of your head. You realize there’s been a beat of silence since he’s spoken, so you clear your throat, a warmth creeping up on your neck as if he’d been able to hear your thoughts. “Do you know them?”
He shakes his head slightly. “Not really, no. They played in the pub once, Ronnie hated them.” He glances at you, corner of his lips itching upwards. “Call themselves Crystal Illusion, so there’s that.”
“Christ.” You can’t help but roll your eyes. “And here I thought it couldn’t get any worse.”
The sound of his giggle makes you look back at him, catching the sight of his dimples carving deep on his cheeks. “You’re really something, aren’t you, bunny?”
“Why do you call me that?” The question rolls of your tongue before you can even think about it. His brows raise at your question, and you decide to enjoy the rush of confidence and pick on it further. “Dunno if I’m supposed to feel offended or charmed.”
 “Don’t mean it as a tease, can tell that much.” He smiles, shrugging slightly. “You just remind me of a bunny.”
The words pique your curiosity. “How so?”
He looks back down to his lap, and if it wasn’t for the poor lighting you would be sure of the blush taking over his cheeks. “Just all cute -- could tell you were a bit reserved, and like, curious. Had your eyes wandering all around when I first saw you.” He moves his head around lightly as if to explain his point and you have to bite back a smile. “And when you were focused you’d scrunch your nose a bit. Like a bunny.”
“I’m glad you didn’t say I have big ears.” You try to humor, searching for his eyes.
He laughs, looking up at you. “I mean, now that you’ve mentioned it…”
Your gasp shifts into a giggle as you push him away playfully. “Well, if I’m a bunny...” You pause, racking your mind to think of an analogy for him, but your mind is still a bit slowed down, your thoughts taking a beat too long to catch up to your words. When you glance down to the arm that’s brushing against yours, you notice the tattoo peaking on his skin. You reach for it without thinking about it, fingers tracing the ink as you take in the drawing, his eyes follow your touch curiously. “Then you’re an eagle.” You cringe to yourself as soon as the words come out of your mouth, attempting to mask it as you breathe out a laugh.
He arches his brows, lips fluttering, trying to hold back a smile. “You think I’ll kill you?”
“Oh shit, you’re right.” You cover your face with your hand, shaking your head at yourself. “Didn’t think that one through.” Your laughs meld together for a moment, slowly dying off and giving space a comfortable silence. The only sounds being the nightly hum of cicadas and the whisper of the breeze against the branches of the trees, that and, well, the faint screams of instruments from inside the house. Looking up at him, a breath hitches when you realize the proximity of his eyes to yours. You try to tease him but when you speak your voice comes out lower than you expected, almost in a whisper,  “so you think I’m cute?”
“Course I do.” He says in a blink. “Don’t think that’s much of a secret, love.”
You chew on your bottom lip, not missing the way his eyes dart down on your face. “You’re not so bad yourself.”
“Yeah?” He smirks, wiggling his eyebrow teasingly. “Think I’m pretty?”
“I won’t inflate your ego if that’s what you want.”
“I tried.” He breathes out a laugh, eyes moving back down on your face but this time he doesn’t rush them back to yours, not hiding the intent of his gaze. For the first time, you’re glad for the background noise, afraid that if it wasn’t for it he’d be able to hear the thumping of your heart.“Can I kiss you?”
“Huh?” You blink at him, not because you didn’t hear him, but because you’re a bit taken back at the forwardness of the question.
 He moves his arm to rest on the back of the bench, turning his hand to play with the tips of your hair. “Can I kiss you, bunny?” He repeats.
You nod before you can find it in you to voice your answer, clearing your throat, “yes.”
The hand that’s not in your hair moves to caress your cheek, he takes a moment to look at you, thumb rubbing your cheek gently before he leans in. Your eyes flutter close instinctively, holding your breath in anticipation as you feel his lips on the corner of your mouth. He keeps them there for a beat before pulling back, tilting your face a little just to finally close the space between your mouths.
The kiss starts slow. Uncertain, even. His lips are soft against yours, warm breath hitting your cupid bow as he sucks in your bottom lip gently. You feel his hand cupping your jaw, sneaking behind your neck as he pulls you closer and you all but melt under his touch. Being this close you can smell the scent of his cologne mixed with the smoke of cigarettes, and something about it is so sensual you can’t help but grip on his shirt as to have something to hold on to.
You can feel yourself getting lost on his touch, shamelessly scooping to the side as you enlace your thighs for the sake of being closer to him. His hand falls on your knee, rubbing it as your tongue line on his bottom lip.
It’s the sound of the door that leads to the house sliding open that falls like a bucket of ice water on your head, reminding you of your surroundings, and that you’re not, in fact, alone with him in the garden, which means any of your friends could easily spot you if they were to walk outside.
  It’s almost like he reads your mind when you pull away from him, loosening your grasp on the material of his shirt. His lips don’t let you get far, trailing their way along your jaw until he can bite on your lobe. “Relax, petal” He whispers, pulling back to look at you as your noses brush together. “They won’t see us, even if they do they’re probably too stoned to even care.”
You let out a weak chuckle, gazing at the door where a group of people stumble their way towards the bus, voices loud as they slur incoherent words. It’s hard to see inside the house as most of the lights inside seem to be turned off, but you can tell how packed it is, bodies pressed so close together it makes you wince slightly just with the thought of being amongst them. Looking back at him, you ponder for a second before nodding. “You’re right.”
A grin paints on his face before he leans in, closing the space between you once again.
                                 ❁         ❁        ❁ 
“Still with us?” A call of your name on the mic snaps you out of your thoughts.
Looking up, you’re met with your bandmates curious eyes staring right at you and you realize you’ve probably been too lost in your own head to pay attention to the conversation in hand. Your lips part for a split second, trying to think of an answer that doesn’t give away your lack of focus but a single look at Abbey’s arched brows and you know you’ve been caught. 
You clear your throat, lips tugging on a guilty smile. “Sorry, I am now.” 
It’s hard not to let your eyes glimpse to the back of the room, where the sole reason for your distraction sits quietly on his regular spot, tucked behind his journal and doing his own thing. But you hold back the stare, knowing your moves were being watched by your friend who’s back to talking about the setlist changes for the night, and who would not be happy in the slightest to notice your wandering eyes falling on the one person she despises the most. You wonder how she’d react if she got her hands on the piece of paper burning through the back pocket of your denim shorts. 
The message was short and simple, but the connotation behind it carried a much stronger meaning to it.
Meet me in the back before the gig, want to see you. -H
You found it tucked inside your case, lying innocently on top of your bass, apparent enough so anyone who’d opened the case could’ve found it before you. Surely, no one else did, otherwise, you wouldn’t hear the end of it from the minute you’d stepped into the place. Which makes you wonder how he managed to slip in the note sneakily enough without anyone noticing it, but the curiosity is well dulled in your mind by the pounding of your heart.
To your dismay, however, you barely got a look at him throughout the rehearsal. You got to The Blue Bird later than you’d intended to, the tutoring session you had on the day ended up running later than you’d expected. So by the time you stepped through the string curtains of the pub  Harry was already tucked on the shadowy corner and everyone else was hanging by the stage waiting for you, barely giving you a second to set your bag in the dressing room.
So it’s hard for you not to stare when he gets up from his seat, walking into the lighter space of the bar with his signature smirk painted on his face. You’d just gone through the last song of your set for the second time -- an amplified version of Girls Just Wanna Have Fun (Lena insisting on repeating it after messing up on the first try). He’s holding a maroon leather jacket on his arm, along with his journal, leaving his arms bare under his Bowie tank top -- which, as he approaches the stage you notice the uneven hem on the sleeves, suggesting he might’ve cut them off himself.  His hair is running wild as usual, the fringe curling against his forehead and you chew on your lip at the thought of running your hands through it as you did not even a week ago.
He reaches to the back pocket of his jeans, pulling out a pack of cigarettes as he reaches the end of the stage. “That was a great one, everybody, maybe if you keep it going we can get you a spot on that wacky show they’re premiering.” He sets the stuff he’s carrying on the stage floor, crossing his arms on top of it. “What’s it called again? ‘S like ‘gag me with a spoon’ or something like that.”
“We wouldn’t want to steal your spot again.” The words leave your lips before you can process them, for a moment forgetting you’re not alone with him so your playful tease can be easily interpreted as mocking. 
He rests the things he’s carrying on his arm on the stage floor, hoisting himself up almost effortlessly before picking them up again, walking the few steps it takes for him to stand in front of you. His lips are tugged on a shit-eating grin. “Got another feisty one in here, huh?” He crosses his arms under his chest, and you can’t help but note the way his muscles flex at the gesture, his tattoos dancing slightly on his skin. “What makes you so smug about stealing my spot? Reckon Ronnie only said he needed more chicks hanging around.”
“If that’s the case then there’s no need for you to be intimidated by a band of chicks, then.” You keep your eyes trained on his, but you can notice Abbey’s getting wider from over his shoulder. 
His lips twitch up, and you can tell he’s holding back a genuine smile as not to crack your act. “Am I intimidated now, bunny?”
“It’s what it looks like.” You shrug, now holding back your own smile.
“Maybe you need to take a better look at things then, angel.”  He starts walking backwards in the direction of the backstage. “Wouldn’t want any more misunderstandings, would we?”
“Don’t think we would.” 
And with that, he turns around, walking the rest of the way out and disappearing as he rounds the corner to where you know it’s the door leading to the back alleyway. You just stand there quietly for a moment, following his steps as you try to recollect what just happened. For the two of you, it was clear that the tension was the product of an unspoken want circling around, but you question for a second if that’s the impression that your friends had. And as you look at their expressions, raised brows and mouths agape, it’s hard to tell.
“Holy shit, babe.” Abbey is the first to speak out. “Didn’t know you had that in you.”
You hold back a relieved exhale, shrugging slightly as you remove the strap of the bass from your shoulder. “He was just getting on my nerves.” You face away from her, placing the instrument on the stand.
The anticipation of meeting Harry grows impatiently on your stomach as you try to find a gap where no one’s attention is on you to sneak out of the dressing room. It seems as if every time you think you can do it, someone pulls you in, either to try to push you another pill of something you’re not sure what it is or to ask you to help with their makeup. But as the room gets filled and people get higher, their focus become more diffuse, and finally, after finishing assisting Jaz with her eyeliner (her hands were too shaky to get it right) you manage to slip out the room into the corridor.
There’s a sense of recognition that takes over your body when you feel the wind messing with your hair as you step out the building to be met with Harry’s figure leaning back on the wall, not too far from the spot you found him the last time you’d been in this same position. His eyes shoot in your direction as soon as you step through the door as if he’d been waiting for this just as eagerly as you were. He quickly throws the butt of the cigarette on the floor, stepping on it before standing tall as you slowly approach him.
“Hi.” You say simply, fingers fidgeting with the hem of your shorts -- not knowing with to do with your hands.
“Hi.” His grin grows. “Came back here to intimidate me?” He teases, biting on his bottom lip.
“Actually,” you scrunch your lips, deciding to play his game as you reach on your back pocket, retrieving the small piece of paper and holding it up. “Got this very desperate note from a secret admirer but I don’t see any hotties here.” You click your tongue, looking around as you let out a loud sigh. “Guess it might be just a misunderstanding.”
He laughs, hands reaching for your waist to draw you closer. “That’s too bad, guess you’re stuck with me”
“Yeah?” You wrap your arms around his shoulders, stepping closer so that your chests meet and his forehead falls against yours.
He nods in response, your noses brushing gently before he leans to meet your mouth with his own.
                                 ❁         ❁        ❁
There’s a thrilling feeling that settles deep within you when it comes to holding a secret.
It’s that spark of excitement that brings a kaleidoscope of butterflies to come alive on your stomach. The kind of feeling that makes every cell of your body feel not just simply alive but as if it’s burning with joy. Which is why you guess falling into a routine of sneaking around with Harry on secret little rendezvous was so easy, to begin with. 
Of course, your friends’ opinions are important to you, but you know that you’re an adult very much capable of making your own decisions. That means sleeping with anyone you’d like despite their ill opinions about the person, without having to sneak around as if you’re teenagers hiding from your parents. You know that, and you try to remind yourself of that every time you catch yourself lying to them about your whereabouts at every coming day. 
In the beginning, you weren’t even sure that there was anything to it except for a couple of innocent kisses, maybe some not-so-innocent touches here and there, but nothing really worth even telling anyone. You’d only really see Harry on the weekends. When he would steal moments with you before your gigs when you “had to take a breather”. Or when mysteriously disappeared from your friends’ sides during after parties after they already had their minds buzzed and noses backed up. Or even when your night walks would tart becoming gradually longer due to your curiosity getting the best of you once you found yourself in front of the familiar Pub on Harry’s nights.
The weekends’ escapades took a different turn when they graduated to weekdays. Things took a quick turn then. It started with him offering you a ride to the houses for your tutoring or to the library (stealing kisses every now and then, of course). And before you knew, you were making up classes or books to rent for your oblivious roommates, only to spend hours on Harry’s car. Coming back with puffy lips and messy hair.
Part of you felt bad for going behind their backs, every now and then feeling an urge to pull Lena aside and gush about him for as long as your heart desired.
But it’s the thrill of it, of having something that’s just yours to have, that no one else knows except the two of you. The adrenaline that comes with the possibility of getting caught at any moment, but being able to get away with it. It’s almost addicting to you, so you prefer to have these moments just to yourself.
As the days went by, and those days turned into weeks, and those weeks turned into months, it just made it harder for you to tell them you’d been hiding a whole relationship for this amount of time. Well, not exactly a relationship, but as close as you ever got to one anyway.
And it’s not like you’d never had anyone before. Being in the music scene, you’ve had your quite a few amounts of flings — even though not as many as it’s expected. But no one has ever left you as enamored as him, especially not as quickly as he has. He’s intriguing, carrying around that mysterious aura around him that leaves everyone wondering the secrets he holds in his heart. 
Although when it’s just the two of you it’s like this cocky persona of him completely dissolves. It’s a complete contrast from the image he carries around the restless mouths of prying people. He’s not that enigmatic heartbreaker who hops around strangers beds as if to live that classic Rock ‘n Roll lifestyle you see on TV. Rather, he’s shown himself to be the most caring man you’ve ever been with.
And that’s how you found yourself in this position, your body awkwardly positioned on your side in the rear seat of his car. A hand tangled on his hair while the other pulls at his Bowie shirt, you know your lips are probably starting to get swollen and his are taking a raspberry tone from the way they’d been sucking at one another. So with that in mind, you part from his mouth, trailing kisses along his cheek, and a final one at his nose before sitting back on the seat.
Just as you predicted his rose-colored lips are plump as he grins back at you, his locks are wild on top of his head. His hair has grown around his jawline now, curls poking out in all directions and you can’t help but reach your hand to pull his fringe back from his forehead. His smile growing fondly and eyes fluttering shut as you run your hand through his strands. 
When you pull away you catch a glimpse of your wrist clock, cringing slightly at yourself as you realize you should start thinking of heading home.
“I have to go soon.” You let your hand fall to your lap with a sigh.
“Already?” He pouts. “Barely had any time together.”
“We’ve been here for two hours, silly.” You giggle at his dramatics, leaning to press your lips on his chin.
He throws an arm over your shoulder, keeping you close. “Exactly, barely any time.”
He turns his head to connect your mouths once more before pulling you against him so your head rests on his shoulder. You look beyond the glass of the windshield to the nearly empty street -- saving from a few people walking back from what you assume is a day of work
He’s parked on the usual spot two blocks away from your house, and from this angle, you can see the front gate that leads to the entrance. The front seat of the coupe still folded forward as there was no reason to set it back to place considering the circumstance in which you were on the backseat. You had called home from the payphone in front of the library, letting Lena know you’d be home late to catch up with some studies -- another lie to your pile.
There’s a comfortable silence that falls between the two of you -- apart from the low voice of the radio Dj interrupting A-ha’s Take On Me in the background. If you move your head just right you can hear his speeding heartbeat, and if wasn’t for the faltering on his breathing you’d assume he was just as relaxed as you are. You move away from him, his arm falling around your waist, looking at his profile as he pokes at his jeans, a crease between his eyebrows.
You rest your cheek against the leather seat, grasping his chin with your fingers and gently moving his head so his gaze meets yours. “What’s on your mind, handsome?”
He breathes out a laugh, shrugging lightly as he brings his hand to scratch at the tip of his nose. “Nothing much.”
“But there’s something.” You insist, being able to tell he’s pondering over something.
“It’s just-- I just thought--” he pauses with a sigh. You play with the rings on his fingers, waiting patiently for him to express his thoughts, you can tell he’s a bit nervous which is an adorable change from his regular charming demeanor. “I wanted to maybe-- like, we could have a date.”
You straighten your posture, lips parting as you take in his words. “A date?”
“Yeah… A proper one, you know?” He shrugs, eyes darting back on yours. “If you want to, that is! Don’t wanna pressure you or anything.”
“I do, H.” You nod, chewing on your lip as you try to recollect your thoughts. It’s not as if you don’t want to go on a date with him, that couldn’t be further from the truth. But turning it into a formality just changes completely the scheme of things and, as much as you felt like this is an inevitable step to take at some point, you still feel protective to an extent of this secret you have between the two of you. So you can help but let your voice come a little apologetic, “it’s just--”
“I know.” His shoulders drop and you can’t help but feel a tug at your heart.
“Hey.” You caress his cheek. “I’ll think about it, okay?”
“Okay.” His lips perk up in a small smile, and you lean forward to give him a peck.
He’s still looking at you with puppy-like eyes and it does nothing to help the heaviness in your heart from turning him down. You lean again this time to spread kisses around his cheek as an attempt to pull a giggle out of him, but you only earn a light chuckle so you seat back tilting your head to look at him with a pluck of your lips. “C’mon where’s my smug rockstar gone?”
“He’s right here.” The shadow of his dimples appears on his cheeks. His voice comes out low and gentle, as if he’s still pondering over what you said earlier, “just toned him down a bit.”
You sigh, trying to rack your brain to another subject that can distract him from it. You catch sight of the slightly smudged end of his eyeliner, and your face lights up as you remember a request you’ve always wanted to bring it up. “Do you want to know something?” Biting back a cheeky grin, you cross your arms under your chin as he looks at you with raised eyebrows. “Should let me do your makeup, so you can be a proper rockstar.”
He lets out a laugh. “Do I need that, now?”
“Mhm, said it yourself, it’s part of the look.”
“Did I say that?” You nod, teeth still biting on your lip. He lets out a breath, contemplating the idea for a second before looking back at you. “Okay then.”
“Is that a yes?”
“Course, could never say no to you even if I tried.” He lets his hand fall on your thigh, rubbing it gently. “On one condition, though.” You arch your brows in question. “Come to my gig tomorrow.”
You face scrunches in confusion. “I always go to your gigs.”
“Yeah but I mean go earlier, like so we can hang out before and stuff.” His finger starts to draw circles on your knee. “So you can do my makeup, too, can go on stage looking all pretty.”
“As if you could ever look anything less than pretty.” You say before sitting back, thinking of his proposal. “You’re asking me to be there early…”
“What? D’you have plans already? Got a boyfriend I don’t know about?” And there it is, the teasing Harry you know.
You shake your head, poking his side playfully. “Oh yeah, maybe I should’ve mentioned him sooner.”
“Shut up.” He rolls his eyes before looking at you, his voice coming down to a pleading tone. “Come, please.”
Before the yes can roll off your tongue you remember that you wouldn’t be alone with him. “What about your band?” 
He furrows his brows. “What about them?”
“Well, do they know?”
“They couldn’t care less about us, baby.” He sighs, head falling back on the seat as he moves his hand so it rests on your inner thigh, rubbing a spot in there. “Have no meaning hiding you.”
You can’t hold back the smile that grows on your lips, leaning to press a kiss to his mouth before letting professing in just above a whisper, “You always know what to say, don’t you?”
                                 ❁         ❁        ❁ 
“‘S poking my eye.”
“Shh, quiet.”
“You’re rubbing it too harsh.” Harry grabs your wrist, eyes fluttering open to stare up at you.
“I’m being gentle, you’re just not used to the feeling of the brush.” You argue, keeping a finger under his chin so his head is tilted upwards as you shuffle on his lap. “Now close your eyes, I’m almost done.”
He lets out a huff, trying to feign annoyance, but the slight twitch of his lips and the subtle appearance of his dimples break his facade. You know as much as he won’t admit to it, he’s quite enjoying having you propped on his lap, fingers stroking gently his eyelids while you hum along to The Cure’s record that’s mixing with the murmurs of the other people in the room.
To your surprise, you’ve come to realize that the dressing room is significantly less chaotic when it comes to Harry’s band. The place is not nearly as packed as it can get during your nights, in fact, apart from the band itself, there’s only a handful of people hanging around. And as much as you notice their bloated pupils and stumbled walks, they mostly keep it to themselves, sharing around a bottle of vodka to wash down their pills.
Like Harry had assured you, his bandmates couldn’t be less bothered by your presence amongst them. And as much as you recognize all from the numerous gig you’ve been in before, and that according to them your name has been frequently mentioned by Harry himself (which did make his cheeks turn into an adorable shade of red), it’s nice to be formally introduced to them. In fact, they were so quick to treat you as one of their own that you could feel a slightly guilty feeling expanding on your chest from the number of times you’d heard your friends bad mouthing them in attempts to joke around. 
You swallowed the feeling back, though, accepting a plastic cup they poured with champagne (which you learned is a tradition before gigs) and making a conversation.
“Are you done yet?” You feel the vibration of his voice on that back of your fingers that touch against his throat.
“Yes,” you say with a final stroke of your brush on his eyes, sitting back to admire your work with your teeth carved on your bottom lip. “You can open your eyes, baby.”
He blinks his eyes open and you can’t help the smile that breaks through your lips as you examine the contrast of the burning red eyeshadow with his jade irises as he looks back at you. “How do I look?” 
You grab his cheeks, leaning down to press a quick peck on his lips. “Like a proper rockstar.”
“Yeah?” He grins once you let your hands caress on the smooth skin of his chest poking through his unbuttoned blue blouse. “Think I can finally get some groupies now?”
Scoffing, you swing your hand to shove him back playfully with a roll of your eyes. You try to move away but he grabs hold of your wrists, pulling you in again. “You’re insufferable.”
“Just how you like it.” His hands fall to your waist, bringing it closer as you let your arms wrap around his shoulders. 
His lips meet your on a slow kiss, allowing you to taste the strawberry flavor of the lipstick you’d applied earlier, the thought of messing it completely lost in your mind as you tilt your head to deepen it even more. His fingers now grip on your hips over your denim skirt that has ridden up considerably since you first propped yourself on his lap. For a moment you just stay like this, tangled on each other’s arms, every so often you scratch on his neck, pulling his hair just a bit so you can swallow the most delicious mewls.
He parts from you as slowly as the kiss started, pecking on your lips a couple of times before letting his head fall back, hands moving to rub at your thighs over your pink tights. His eyes are hooded as he looks up at you with a smirk, voice coming low as if he’s sharing a secret just between the two of you, “can we go to the back?”
“Sure.” You unstranddle him, adjusting your skirt as you stand up and offering your hands to help him to his feet. He takes them, almost bringing you back down on the couch as he pulls a little bit too hard. 
Once he’s up he takes a look at himself on the mirror in the wall opposite to the couch, a pleased smile on his face letting you know he likes the result of your work. He reaches for your hand then, guiding you into the hallway and out the back door you’ve become so familiar with.
Walking into the alleyway, he walks to his usual spot, leaning back on the wall and pulling you with him. His hands easily find their place on your waist once again, fingers tapping against the fabric of your skirt anxiously. Looking down at you, there’s anticipation on his eyes, as if he’s trying to tell you something but is waiting for you to bring it up.
“So,” he begins, eyes darting around as he parts his legs a bit, enough to fit you between them as he pulls you closer.
“So…” You say, drifting off as a way to encourage him to keep going.
“I’ve thought about the date thing.”
You wrap your arms around his neck, playing with the ends of his har. “Wasn’t I the one that was supposed to be doing that?”
 He shrugs slightly, looking down to where his fingers fiddle with a loose strand of your vest. There’s something very endearing about seeing him so nervous, a complete opposite to how he carries himself in public, as this cocky and confident guy. You’re grateful that he allows you to see this side of him, though, bringing your hand to caress his jawline as you wait him to speak his thoughts. “Yeah, but I had like, an idea, or whatever.”
“Do tell.”
“I thought we could do--” he shakes his head a bit. “We could go to a place that’s still more reserved, and stuff.” 
“Like?”
“I dunno, I--” he chews on his lip, a habit he’s starting to get from you. “Thought we could go to my flat and like hang out, we could go to that diner that has a drive tru and get something to eat and go back to my place.” 
“Are you trying to take me home, Styles?” You tease, not being able to hold back a smile.
“It’s not like that, I just--” he huffs, cheeks getting a bit flushed as he tries to explain himself. “Just if you’re comfortable with it, of course, we can still go around on my car if you prefer, I don’t mind.”
“Harry?” You hold his cheek, moving it so his eyes can meet yours. Rubbing your thumb against his smooth skin, you try to soothe him, shooting him a fond smile.  “I think that’s a really nice idea.”
“Yeah?” You don’t miss the way his eyes light up. “Is that a yes, then?”
“Of course.”
“Cool, I can, like, call you before I leave home so you can go to our spot and I can pick you up, yeah?” It’s the fastest he’s speaking since the moment you walked out of the building, voice a pitch higher. “How about Friday?
“Great.” You giggle, tangling your fingers on his hair to pull him down so his forehead rests against yours. Lips brushing, you blink up at him, jade eyes flickering around your face, “I can’t wait.”
He smiles. “Me too.”
                                 ❁         ❁        ❁
An annoyed puff leaves your lips as you notice another typo in one of the words inked in the paper poking out of the typewriter. You grab it maybe a bit too forcefully, this being the fourth time in a matter of minutes you had to do this. Taking it out of the platen, you reach for the whiteout conveniently prompted next to you, carefully correcting the error before putting the paper back on the machine.
With the end of the term peeking around the corner, you’ve been finding yourself in this position more often than not. Either rushing with your essays or grading assignments from your students. No matter what the arrangement is, however, there’s always a guarantee to have a half-empty mug of coffee and a pile of textbooks spattered on your desk. 
This time around is no different, as you lean back on your chair, closing your eyes and rubbing your hands over your face, you try to focus on Cyndi Lauper singing in the background as a way to relieve your stress. You can feel the inkling of a headache deep inside your forehead, indicating maybe it’s time to give yourself a break, So, you try your best to relax the tension out of your muscles, breathing in the soft chamomile scent of the burning candle on your nightstand -- it’s one Lena gave to you to help with the stress a few days ago. What disturbs you from your moment of meditation with Time After Time, making you snap out of your breathing exercise, is the ringing tone of the telephone echoing through the house. The sound comes into your room a bit muffled thanks to your closed door, but it’s still enough to irritate you.
You hear closely to the sounds outside your door, waiting for Lena, who you know is propped on the couch downstairs watching TV, to pick up the call and cease the annoying tune interrupting your moment. And as you predict, in just a few minutes the ringing noise stops as quickly as it started, making you relax back on your chair. Closing your eyes again, you let yourself go back to the moment before the interruption, untensing your shoulders. You can hear the pound of heavy footsteps coming up the wooden staircase, but don’t process them getting closer until your door swings open.
Lena is standing in your doorway with an expression that’s hard to read at first, her brows set on a slight frown her hairline and mouth agape. Before you can tell her off for her sudden entrance she’s already speaking, “can you tell me why the fuck Harry Styles is calling our house looking for you?”
You can feel your heartbeat falter at her words, eyes widening as you glance at your bunny-shaped clock and realizing you had gotten so lost in your studies you forgot about the date. “Shit,” you get up so fast from your chair it falls back on the rug. You turn to Lena, who’s watching the scene with the most amused smirk on her face, “is he still one the line?”
As soon as she nods you’re stumbling down the stairs, almost falling down on the last steps but catching yourself up on the railing. You reach for the wired phone lying upwards on the hallway stand, picking it up and walking into the closest door - which happens to be the coat closet - closing it behind you.
“Hello?” You sound out of breath, heartbeat roaring in your ear.
“Did I fuck it up?” His voice is hesitant, nearly remorseful, it makes your heart drop.
“I-- no, you didn’t.” You reassure, leaning back on the wall of the tiny space, instantly regretting your decision of not choosing the restroom in your panic state.  “I just got caught up with an essay and didn’t see the time passing.”
“Do you want to reschedule?” He drags out the words as if he doesn’t want to say them. “We can do this another day, I don’t mind.”
“No!” You protest quickly, reaching back to roughly adjust a hanger that’s poking on your neck, causing a raincoat to fall on your feet. “Of course not, I really need a break, anyway. I want to see you.”
“Want to see you, too.” You can hear the smile on his voice. “What about your friend?”
You sigh, rubbing your temple slightly. “I’ll talk to her, don’t worry about it.”
“Okay.” He says. “I’ll be at yours in around fifteen, is that good?”
“That’s perfect, yes.”
“I’ll see you in a bit then…” He drifts off, as if he wants to say something else, but stops himself.
“See you.”
The familiar sound of the deadline takes place and you sigh, letting your head fall back on the wall with a thump and staying like that for a moment. When you step out of the closet, the first thing you see is Lena leaning against the railing of the stairs, shaking her head at you in disbelief. “You bitch.”
Your shoulders drop, not wanting to have this conversation right now, as you put the phone back on the base. “Can we not do this--”
“You’ve been fucking him all this time and you didn’t tell me?” She crosses her arms under her breasts. “Abbey is gonna throw a fit when she knows this.”
“You’re not gonna tell her.”
“I’m not.” She agrees with you. “But she already knows you’re sneaking out with someone.”
“She does?” Your voice gets higher, eyes widening slightly.
“She might be high as a kite most of the time, yes, but she’s not stupid.” She chuckles. “And you’re not the best at hiding either, or you thought we wouldn’t notice you’re barely at home anymore?”
You frown your mouth, feeling like a deer caught in the headlights. “Does she suspect that it’s him?”
“Not really no, thought it was one of your students.”
You can’t help the horrified look that takes over your face. “I tutor children!”
“Ooh,” she breathes out a laugh. “Well, to be fair, he’s probably the last person she would suspect.”
“She’s gonna kill me.”
“Probably.” She shrugs. “But she’ll just have to get over it.”
“I guess.”
Lena looks at you, dropping her arms as she walks to you. Holding into your shoulders, her expression softens. “Don’t worry about this right now, okay? Go get ready for your date.”
“You’re right.”  You sigh, nodding. It takes you a second, but as you process her words, you frown, squinting your eyes at her. “How do you know we have a date right now?”
Her hands drop, mouth scrunching as she waves her hands around. “I just guessed.”
“Were you listening on the line?’
“Of course not!” She steps away.
“Adeline!”
She backs away, reaching the bottom of the stairs with the guiltiest look you’ve ever seen splattered on her face. “It was just a bit of it! I was curious!”
You shake your head in disbelief. “I’m gonna cut the cord of that phone in your room.”
“No, you’re not.” 
Raising your eyebrows in challenge, you take a careful step in her direction, causing her to go up another step. There’s a beat of silence where you two just stare at each other, waiting for the other to make the first move. When you finally give in, racing towards the staircase, she stumbles up the rest of the steps, the sound of your giggles mixing together taking over the space.
                                 ❁         ❁        ❁
There’s an instant sense of comfort when you see Harry’s lime green Ford parked on your usual spot, one that gives an extra pep to your walk, pushing all the stress you’ve been dwelling with to the back of your mind. And as you relax into the leather seat, windows down and radio up, you let yourself enjoy the anticipation of spending the rest of your day with him that settles deep in your stomach. 
You’d always wondered what Harry’s apartment would look like, imagining his LP’s splattered across the place, along with loose papers filled with guitar riffs and song lyrics. Maybe a couple of plants here and there, from what he told you he had tried to take care of one or two before, but always ended up forgetting to water them on schedule. And there’s also a notion inside of you that two young men living together in an apartment are bound to live in somewhat of a nest, so you brace yourself for the piles of beer cans and video game wires tangling on the floor.
When he opens the front door for you, letting you walk in before him, it does surprise you to find a tidier place than you’d expected his living room to be, but you realize you’d not been much far off with your assumption. It’s clear this is a house of musicians from the second you step in, the first sight being two guitars leaning on the wall next to the mud green couch, surrounded by - you guessed it - loose papers, which you assume are filled with scribbled ideas. A wall piano also stands out across the room, a single ashtray standing on top of it next to two candles, where you assume comes the faint scent of vanilla comes from.
“Sorry about the mess,” Harry speaks out from behind you, shrugging out of his usual denim jacket and throwing it over the couch arm, looking back at you with his hands on his hips.
“It’s alright.” Your teeth sink on your bottom lip as you take in the sight of him. Without his jacket, he’s left with just a wine-colored half-buttoned blouse, sleeves rolled up to his elbows so some of his tattoos are exposed. Part of the hem is tucked inside his low waist jeans that hug his thighs so perfectly it makes you want to grip your nails on it. Shaking your head, lightly, you let your eyes wander around the room once more, so he doesn’t notice you gawking at him. “Was expecting worse, to be honest.”
“Do you think that little of me?” He feigns offense.
You giggle, taking a lazy step towards him, shrugging. “I just don’t expect two young men to know the basic of cleaning, that’s all.”
“That’s fair,” he chuckles, taking a moment to just look at you. When a silence settles between the two of you, you raise your brows at him, waiting for him to make the first move. He clears his throat, running his hand through his hair. “Do you want anything to drink?”
“Sure!” You nod. “Do you have, like, beer or…”
“Yes, yes I--” he stops, face lighting up in realization. “No wait, I have something better.” He strides towards a door to where you assume the kitchen is, calling over his shoulder, “make yourself comfortable, I’ll be right back!”
You laugh to yourself, shaking your head as you pull your purse off your shoulder, letting it rest beside Harry’s jacket on the couch. Glancing over your shoulder, there are no signs of him coming back, so you take the opportunity to snoop around the area. 
There’s a small center table in front of the couch, probably the messiest part of the room so far, a few movie magazines splattered around with another ashtray lying on top of it, a few butts of cigarettes long forgotten along with their ashes. Next to it, is a VHS cover of </i> Ghostbusters, a rental receipt paper scrambled on top of it. What calls your attention is a couple of cassette tapes, some with titles you recognize from being Harry’s songs scribbled on top of them but others don’t have a label, which leads you to assume they must be blank. 
You walk around the table, gazing to the tv stand, where a poster of Freud is stuck on the wall behind it -- and breathing out a laugh as you notice someone had drawn glasses and colored his beard with a red sharpie. A bookshelf stands next to it, completely filled with records (apart from a single succulent that has a piece of paper with the name “Ziggy” glued to it). Your curiosity gets the best of you, picking up some LPs on random and what does surprise you, is the lack of a common theme between them. Finding a bit of everything, from some very recognizable names you’ve seen Harry rock to, like Billy Joel and The Clash, to some you’d never even heard him speak of like Culture Club and even a brand new Madonna record.
You have just picked up the cover of Ladies of the Canyon when his voice startles you from behind. “Mitchell, huh?”
Turning back with the record still in hands, you look down at it. “I love her.” You glance up, taking notice of the glasses in his hand, filled with a liquid of a yellow so bright it reminds you of a highlighter. “What’s this?”
“This,” he hands you a glass. “Is a drink we made.”
You raise your eyebrows at him. “You made this?”
 “I’m a man of many talents, bunny.”
“It looks like poison.” You bring the glass up to your nostrils, taking in the strong scent of alcohol. “Am I going to be poisoned? Is this a big plan to get rid of your rival’s bassist?”
“Stop being silly.” He rolls his eyes. “It’s mainly pineapple and vodka, takes weeks to be done, proper fancy stuff, you know?”
“Oh yeah super fancy.” You tease, chewing on your bottom lip to hold back a smile.“Pineapple and vodka.”
“Shut up and drink it.” He says, watching you carefully as you slowly bring the brim of the glass to your lips, taking a small sip of it. An instant sweet taste of pineapple invading your tastebuds, but the vodka is so present it makes you scrunch your nose. Harry gives you a small smile, eyes trained on you as he waits for your verdict, “so…”
“It’s strong.” Your face is still a bit rumpled from the alcohol, but you relax it eventually taking another sip of it, this time quite more prepared for it. “But it’s good, tastes like pineapple and vodka, who would say?”
“Shut up.” He chuckles, taking a step back and propping himself down on the couch.
With the record still in hands, you turn to put it back where you found it, admiring the full bookshelf once more. “Got a nice collection here, Styles, I gotta admit.”
He sips on his drink. “Found something you fancy in there?”
“A couple.”
“Put on something you like.” He motions to the record player standing next to the shelf. You look through the vast collection again, picking some at random and putting it back once you realize it’s not what you’re looking for. After going through a few, you finally stumble upon Elton John’ Madman Across The Water, holding it up to show it to Harry. “Oh, so we’re in one of those moods?”
You pull the vinyl from the sleeve, carefully placing it on the player and adjusting the needle over it. As the beginning note of Tiny Dancer float through the room, you look back at him. “What mood?”
 “Like, a happy-sad kind of mood.”
You nod, setting yourself on the couch next to him. “That’s a nice way to put it.”
As the first few songs swim in the air around there’s a light chatter that settles between the two of you. Nothing out of your ordinary conversations, mainly consisting of you gushing over John Taylor as Harry rolls his eyes and sips on his drink to mask the drop of jealousy that grows on his chest -- “He’s not that good looking, you lot should have better standards” he said with a huff, making you giggle at his antics and pinch his cheeks. But it doesn’t take long, barely going halfway through the record, until the two of you begin to feel more lightheaded, eyes glossy and tongues getting looser. You should’ve expected that from the very first sip of the drink in your hand, knowing it wouldn’t take much more than a glass of it to get you right boozed up. And it doesn’t help that which each sip of it the sweetness of the pineapple takes over the strong taste of the alcohol, and in a matter of a few songs, you already feel your mind soaring away.
Harry is not much different, you realize, becoming quite a bit of a giggly drunk as he looks at you through half-lidded eyes and slurred words coming out of his mouth (which only makes him laugh more at himself). From what he told you, it hasn’t been the first time he and Mitch attempted on making the drink themselves. They tried it at a cramped bar right outside a Tears For Fears concert and it had gotten them so knackered so quickly they went back the next day to ask the barman (who also happened to be the owner) what was it in. Turns out it was just watermelon and vodka, but the man also explained that the technique he used that took about two weeks for the drink to be ready. From the man’s explanation, it seemed simple enough so they decided to try it for themselves, except they replaced the watermelon with pineapple.
“Just to add a bit of fun to it.” He shimmies his body.
“Is it like the original, though?” 
“‘S close, but not quite his.” He hiccups. “I’m convinced he left out some of the details, the bastard, didn’t want to go around giving out the secret formula of it.”
You giggle, biting into the brim of your glass. “I’m curious to try it with watermelon, now that you’ve mentioned.”
“You have to, bunny!” His head falls back on the couch, dimples so deep you want to bite into them, his hand strokes lazily on your thigh, every now and then moving up to rub at the hem of your playsuit. “I’ll take you there sometime, we can get baked and crash into a concert at the music house that’s right in front of it.”
“Sounds like a plan.”
When the blue of the sky outside begins to fade into a golden glow, ribbons of pink and orange cutting through it, you’re already completely far gone. The record player is now only letting out a faint buzz from the lack of sound now that the LP is over. Your head is filled with clouds and you don’t register when Harry reaches back for the guitar, only really registering it once he’s stringing out a familiar melody. He stumbles with the lyrics but as soon as you recognize the beginning line of </i> Big Yellow Taxi you’re joining him, your voices tangling in a high pitch as you more of scream the lines than really bother to sing it. Harry gets completely lost in it, and you let him take over every so often just to watch him, mimicking Joni Mitchell's voice and even enacting her laugh, which makes you laugh until your belly hurts and your cheeks get flushed.
It’s one of those moments you want to get locked in, to live in it forever. Watching him stumbling the lyrics of different songs, the words tumbling out of his mouth between giggles, fingers stroking the cord of the guitar maybe a bit too harshly as you join him without a care in the world to who may be bothered by it. You feel so free with him, it’s a feeling that takes over your whole body, a warmth of knowing you don’t have to filter yourself or fit any type of expectation. And as he ends another cover with violent strokes on the guitar you laugh along with him for a moment before letting the room quiet down. Crossing your arms over the back of the couch and resting your cheek against it, you just look at him.
His bloodshot green meets yours, his chest rising as he catches his breath from the frantic songs, teeth sinking on his bottom lip as he smiles at you. “Gonna slow down a bit fo’ you.”
You raise your brows at him, smiling in anticipation as he begins to smooth his fingers through the cords much more gently than he had been previously. His head moves along to the beat as he gazes down at the instrument, a slight crease forming between his eyebrows in concentration. It’s a complete contrast from the playful demeanor that had taken over the room just minutes ago.
“Love of my life, you’ve hurt me.” He begins, and your ears instantly perk up as you identify the same song you’d heard him play months ago at the pub, the one that made you enter it to watch him for the first time. “You’ve broken my heart and now you leave me.”
It’s much different now, however, not just from the fact that he’s singing it on his own without the band backing him up. But it’s the meaning behind it, the rawness of his voice, low and slightly raspy, the words still come out a bit mumbled but you couldn’t care less about it, only focusing on the emotion he puts to them. 
“Love of my life, can’t you see?” His eyes are still set on the guitar and you search for them almost desperately, shifting closer to him and cupping his cheek, guiding him to meet your gaze. “Bring it back, bring it back, don’t take it away from me.”
The swell in your heart is overwhelming to an extent, his glossy eyes looking into your with such sincerity it makes you want to jump on him, but you hold back as he keeps going, feeling nearly hypnotized by his voice.
“Because you don’t know, what it means to me.” He leans into your touch, turning to press a quick kiss on your palm as he keeps stroking the chords in a quiet melody. “Love of my life, don’t leave me.”
You can’t help but shake your head slightly as he sings the lyric almost like a plea. “You’ve stolen my love, and now desert me.” He looks back down at the guitar, letting your hand fall to his shoulder. “Love of my life, can’t you see?”
“Bring it back, bring it back, don’t take it away from me.” Peeking under his lashes, he grins up at you, and you can only imagine how you must look to him. Mouth slightly agape, barely blinking as you’re scared if you do this will all turn out to be nothing but a dream. His voice comes out next a bit lower, stretching out the words, “Because you don’t knoow.”
He strokes the chords a bit mindlessly now, playing with the sound of the melody, and he does it so effortlessly you almost hold your breath as not to miss it. “What it means to me.”
When he stops, you don’t really think before latching yourself on him, throwing one leg on each side of his thighs, and cupping his face before meeting his mouth with yours. He immediately wraps an arm around your back, his other hand taking the guitar off his lap and blindly placing it against the wall next to the couch. Once the instrument is no longer a barrier, he places his hands on your hips, pulling you closer. You can taste the memory of a pineapple still lingering on his tongue as you lick into his mouth. The kiss is hungry, maybe a bit sloppy thanks to the substance still very much present in your bloodstreams, but you don’t mind, only moving a hand to tangle on his hair, scratching at his scalp before pulling at his roots. 
A whimper escapes from his mouth, getting lost inside your throat, his grip on your thighs tightens, nails digging in it and you know will leave crescent shapes on your skin. It only makes you do it again, this time his head tilting backward with a small groan, disconnecting your lips, but you’re soon to connect it again, splattering kisses along his jawline until it meets his neck. When you suck on his pulse point, running your tongue over it, his skin vibrates on your lips as he lets out a whine. His hands are now running all over your thighs before resting on top of your ass, bringing your hips to grind against his.
Even with your hazed mind, it’s still hard to miss the very prominent bulge under his jeans. It makes you pull back, looking down to see it straining against his zipper. There’s a flip of a switch inside of you when you realize how much he’s yearning for it, it’s the desire you’ve been pushing back for months now, crashing into you like a wave and you can barely contain a small mewl at the sight.
“Bunny.” He breathes out. When you look back to him, you notice his eyes have darkened considerably. “We don’t have to--”
“Please.” You let your forehead fall against his, rolling your hips again, stealing another whimper from him. “If you want to, I want to.”
“I do -- fuck, I do.” He nods as you keep grinding on him, his hand disappearing on your back pocket, trying to get as closer to you as possible.
When you meet his lips again, the kiss is somehow eager than before. The longing is evident as you grab onto each other. Your hands travel down his chest, nails digging softly on his exposed skin, and once you feel the fabric of his shirt, you’re quickly to undo the rest of the buttons, not disconnecting from him as you do so. Smoothing your hands back up to his shoulders, you help him shrug off the material, letting it fall to the couch without paying mind to it.
“Wait,” he sneaks between kisses, hands coming up to your waist you push you off gently.
You watch with your brows narrowed as he gets up from the couch, walking to his shelf and standing in front of it, looking for something. Leaning to your side, you let yourself admire the muscles of his back as his fingers run through the edges of the records. It’s impressive how even though his collection takes over the whole furniture, he still seems to know exactly where to look for it, focusing on a small section right at the top. He quickly finds what he’s looking for, pulling it with a ‘Aha!’ before turning back to you. 
He holds up a very familiar black cover, the imprint of Queen’s Greatest Hits instantly calling your attention. Doing the same as you’d done earlier, he takes out the disk, placing it on the player before adjusting the needle over it. You watch it with a smile teasing on your lips, finding oddly endearing how he made you pull away from him with the sole purpose of putting on a soundtrack -- making notice to put on something you’d like, as well. He cranks up the volume as the first words of Bohemian Rhapsody start to swallow your thoughts, turning back to you and offering his hand with a cheeky grin painted on his face.
Taking his hold, you let him pull you up from the couch and, before you can really register it, he’s guiding you through the hallway. You stumble on your footing as he rushes a bit to fast for you to really wrap your head around it, the walls of the corridor passing by almost in a blur as it takes your mind a beat too long to catch up with your eyes. Still, your giggles dance along with his all the way to his door at the end of it, making you feel like a couple of teens sneaking out for the first time.
He doesn’t give you a single minute to take notice of his room -- not that you would at this moment, your arousal pooling at your underwear only enhancing the haziness of your mind. In just a speck of a second, he’s already pushing the door closed, your body being pressed against it not long after. His arms find their place on each side of your head, his lips searching hungrily for yours as your fingers find their home between the strands of his hair once more. 
“Shit, need you so bad, baby.” he presses his hips against yours, mouth hot as he sucks in the skin of your jaw, all the way down your neck, finding a spot that makes you whine under his touch. “That’s it, darling, let me hear you again.”
“Harry,” you mewl as his teeth sink on your skin gently, his tongue swiping quickly over the spot before he trails back to your cheek. You melt under his touch when his hands find their way back on your body, one of them caressing the side of your breast softly, thumb poking out to rub the spot where you nipple pebbles under your layers of clothing. This brings out a desperate whimper from your throat, your head falling back on the door as you close your eyes, trying to savor every slight touch of his. “Please.”
“Look so fucking pretty in this piece, bunny.” The sound of his voice is right below your ear, his warm breath hitting your skin making the hairs on your neck rise. “Look gorgeous in anythin”” he turns his head to bite at your earlobe. “But I really need it gone right now.”
Your eyes snapback open when you feel him pull back from you, his hands finding the front buttons of your playsuit, fiddling them open so easily you barely register it. His lips are back on yours, this time slower, letting his desire be known at every brush of his tongue. Smoothing his hands on your shoulders, he helps you out of the sleeves of the top. As soon as your back is disconnected from the wooden door, you start moving forward before you can really think about it, pushing him back gently until the back of his knees hit the mattress and he’s sitting back on the bed.
There’s hardly a speck of green left on his darkened irises when he looks up at you, watching your every move as you shift the material down your body, letting it pool on your feet before you kick it to the side. Taking a slow step towards him, his hands holding onto your hips almost unconsciously, you reach back to find the hook of your bra, but he stops you before you can even quite grasp it. “Wait,” he pulls you closer, making you fall a bit awkwardly on his lap, your hands moving to grip on his shoulder for support. “Let me.”
You adjust your position on top of him, your knees resting next to his thighs, as he handily unhooks your bra, removing it quickly from your arms and tossing it to the side. A gasp escapes your mouth as he wastes no time before attaching his mouth to your breast, tongue circling on your nipple before sucking in. His hand tries to give the same attention to the other one, grasping onto it as his thumb caresses the pebbled nub.
The crescendo of the song comes muffled in the background and it’s as if it’s echoing inside your head while you mindlessly roll your hips against his. The motion makes the lining of his zipper rub deliciously against your clit under the thin fabric of your underwear, and it reminds you of his hardening length pressing on his jeans. It seems to remind him as well, as his mouth parts from your chest in a groan, his lips licking at the space between your breast, kissing all the way back to your neck, where he hides his face with a strangled moan when you grind down a bit harder.
“Can’t take the tease, baby.” He pants. “Need you right fucking now.”
You pull back from him, gazing down at the tent on his pants and bringing your hands to fiddle with his belt. It takes you a bit longer to manage to pull it out, as his eager lips attack your neck once again. At this point, you can only imagine the marks he’s made on your skin, knowing the reddened spots will soon come to a purple shade, but it’s the least of your worries as you pop the button of his jeans, opening up the zipper. 
“Stand up just for a sec, darling.” He taps on your hip and you do as he asks, stepping back to plant your feet on the floor.
He shifts out of his pants, bringing his briefs along with it and you watch the way his cock all but jumps out of its restrains, slapping back on his stomach. The tip is a reddened shade darker, a trace of precum already oozing out of it, dripping down his length and making you rub your thighs for some sort of relief as you feel your mouth watering. You want to reach for it, grasp it as you feel it throb on your palm. You want to trace the prominent veins adorning it with your tongue and discover all the sounds he makes when he’s all but begging for you to wrap you mouth around it already. But more than anything, and what speaks louder to you at the moment, is how you want to feel it deep in your belly, rubbing against your walls until your legs shake.
“My eyes are up here, love.” You look up at him, a smug grin on his face as he draws you in by your hips.
“Can’t help it.” You watch his fingers play with the waistband of your cherry colored underwear, meeting his eyes as you let yourself mess with him a bit. “Just have such a beautiful cock.”
“Christ.” He groans, yanking your panties down your leg, making your arousal drip down your thighs. His lips immediately trace on your pubic bone, hands travelling to grip on your ass as his teeth sink into your skin slowly. “Didn’t know you were this filthy, bunny.”
You enlace your fingers on his strands, pushing his fringe away from his forehead as you mount him again. “Only for you.”
“All for me? What did I do to deserve you?” He smiles, pecking your lips and pulling your closer so you can feel his cock poking at your stomach. “Why don’t you lie down for me?”
You shake your head, pushing his shoulders back gently until his back hits the mattress. “You lie down.”
“Shit, baby, gonna sit on my cock?” He shifts back just slightly, watching you sit back on his thigh as you grab his length, giving it an experimental pump that makes his breath audibly hitch. “Fuck-- such a good girl, aren’t ya?”
You chew on your bottom lip, flickering your palm over the tip and collecting a bit of the precum before rubbing it once more. He lets out a strangled moan, head tilting back on the mattress, his curls splattered around him like a halo. Which is an ironical contrast to what you’re doing to him. 
His voice comes out in a breathy, chest moving frantically as he peeks down at you when you give him another slow pump. “Please, darling, don’t torture me right now, need you so bad.”
If it were another occasion you wouldn’t listen to him, simply continuing your teasing as if he hadn’t said anything at all. But right now you can feel your wetness pooling where you sit on his thigh as you all but throb for him at the sight of his angry cock in your hand. It’s just as much torture to you as it is to him to keep this going any longer, so you just shift up, gabbing his base and rubbing it along your folds one, two, three times, before finally aligning it with your entrance.
His nails dig on your thighs in anticipation, his eyes watching with barely a blink as you slowly sink down. Your mouth hangs open but nothing except a choked gasp comes out of it. There’s a delicious burn that comes with him slowly spreading you open for him, and when you fully sit down your eyes are teary and can’t help but clench around him, earning a full moan in response.
“So fucking tight.” He pants, chest moving up as he takes a sharp inhale when you clench again. “So wet too, baby, drenching me.”
“Fuck, Harry.” You lean forward, hands lying on each side of his torso as you pull up the tiniest bit just to sink down again.
You want to start slow, gradually fastening your pace but you can’t seem to hold yourself back. As his hands grasp on your hips you start to bounce on him at a hard pace, your moans meshing together as well as the faint vocals blasting outside the closed door. Rolling your hips on his, he hits spot that makes you sit on your heels again as you throw your head back, crying out his name. 
It’s hard to keep focus as you mind is blurry from the pleasure that takes over every cell of your body as well as the alcohol still running freely on your bloodstream. All you can focus on right now is Harry. It’s his hands gripping on your skin, helping you fasten your pace. It’s the sound of his voice pitching on a needy whimper, telling you how good you feel around him. It’s the sight of his face creased in pleasure when you look down at him, the veins staining his neck and his locks sticking to his damp forehead, cheeks rosy and lips plump. He’s the only thing in your mind as you chant his name under your breath like a quiet prayer.
“Is my cock that good, bunny?” He meets your thrusts with his hips, making you sob out a moan. His lips tug on a smirk, “Look at you helping you helping yourself out on my cock -- fuck, look like a proper dream.”
There’s a familiar tightness in your stomach, one that makes your toes curl and your rhythm falters. “I’m almost there, shit.”
“Won’t last much longer too, baby, feel too good.” He groans holding your hips in place when you stumble on your pace again, deciding to thrust upwards, your pelvis meeting in loud smacks. “Gonna cum for me? Gonna let me see you looking all pretty when you cum all over my cock?”
“Harry, please.” You’re not even sure what you’re asking for, your eyes closing as you roll back your head. A trifling cramp is starting to set on the back of your thighs but you barely pay any mind to it as the bliss takes over your whole body. You’re so close to your high you can almost reach it, just needing a small push.
“C’mon, baby.” Harry urges you, hand reaching where you’re connected to rub at your clit harshly.
And that’s all you needed, opening your eyes as a couple tears fall down your face when you feel your orgasm taking over you body, the white ceiling feeling far away like an imagine you watch on the television. You’re not exactly sure when Killer Queen started playing, but as the waves of euphoria hit your body, you can hear the guitar solo ringing in your ears, the crescendo of the song only enhancing the thrill of your high as you ride your orgasm along with it.
You practically collapse  down on his chest, his hot skin sticking to your body. He’s still panting under you, warm breath hitting your neck as he holds onto your ass, his thrusts coming sloppier as he comes right after you. The sensitivity of your center makes you whine along with his strangled moans when he holds his hips to yours,burying himself in you as he paints your walls white.
For a moment you just stay like this, cheek resting on his chest, the sound of his heartbeat slowing down by the minute blending with the music coming from outside the closed door. His fingertips trace patterns on your bare arm that’s hugging his torso and keeping him close. You can feel your mind getting clearer, not just from the alcohol but from the high of your orgasm. And as the sound of the soft wind knocks against the window glass, you’re almost lulled to sleep just like this. 
Harry shifts slightly, you feel his lips pressing on your head before he carefully moves to sit up, letting you fall back on the bed gently. “Mind if I have a smoke, bunny?”
You give him a lazy smile, shaking your head as you look up at him, reaching for his locks that poke wildly on his head. Leaning down, he gives you a quick peck before getting up. Turning to your side, you watch as he looks around the room, finding his briefs thrown by the end of the bed and quickly putting them back on. He grabs the pack of cigarettes along with his lighter and heads towards the window.
Opening up the window, allowing the evening breeze to slip through the crack and dance around the room, he pulls a chair leaning on the wall to sit directly by it. The chair is stacked with colored cushions on top of it - one yellow, one red, and one blue - he throws two of them thoughtlessly on the floor next to it, adjusting the remaining one on his back as he leans down to sit on it. The stool is low enough so he can relax his feet on it comfortably, fingers fiddling with the lighter for a second before rising it to meet the end of the cigarette resting between his lips. Freddie Mercury still sings loudly in the living room, the sound coming a bit muffled thanks to the closed door, but making it as background noise as you come quiet to admire his figure against the last creeks of sunlight hitting the side of his profile.
You chew on your lip at the scene, wishing you could record it somehow and play it every night before falling asleep. There’s something inherently erotic about having him smoke a cigar just on his underwear, humming along to the tune of the song, right after having you scream his name into his pillow. 
The light streak of wind coming from the window breaks you out of your thoughts, making goosebumps rise on your skin as you come to the realization that you’re still sitting naked in his bed. It doesn’t take long for you to find your panties hanging from the edge of the mattress, picking them up to quickly slide them up your legs before you get up to search for your other articles of clothing. You can see the colorful pattern of your playsuit lying next to the closed door, but as you crouch to pick it up something else catches your attention in the pile of clothes thrown around mindlessly on top of a wooden chest
It’s the pink shirt. The same one he wore on the day you first saw him play.
A grin takes over your face as you pick it up, throwing it over your shoulders and sliding your hand on the sleeves. It has the faint scent of his cologne mixed with the lingering smell of cigarettes, something you’ve come to associate with him. You don’t bother to button up the material, letting it hug your body as you take a quick look at yourself in the full-body mirror leaning on the wall in front of you. You turn to him, his eyes still focused on the view outside, a thin coat of smoke leaving his lips and getting lost in the breeze, so you clear your throat as to get his attention.
He looks at you, eyes shamelessly scanning down your body and you’re afraid the cig will fall from his lips as they grow on a smug smirk. 
“Look at you,” he lets his feet fall from the stool, fixing them on the floor as he motions for you to get close. You approach him without a second thought, climbing on his lap as his hands hold onto your hips. He takes another look at you, grasping the cigarette with his fingers and taking out of his lips. Reaching for your face, his thumb caresses the side of your eyelid gently. “Looking like a proper rockstar now, even got the smudged makeup.”
You giggle. “That’s more your fault than mine.”
“I guess it is.” He taps the butt of the cig on an ashtray prompted on the stool of the window, eyes still trained on you. “Should do it more often then, s’fucking hot.”
You smile at the connotation, picking at the hem of the shirt and gazing at him from under your lashes. “Guess I might be starting to like pink, that’s also your fault.”
“Look way too good in pink not to like it, bunny.”
“Stop that.” You hide your face on the crook of his shoulder.
“Telling the truth.” His free hand grips on your waist, pulling you closer as he tilts his head to kiss at your neck. “Looks good in everything.”
“Could tell you the same thing.” You pull back to look at him, teeth sinking on your bottom lip as you smooth your hands down his bare chest.  “But I do prefer this fit on you, really brings out your eyes.”
“Naughty.”
You lean to connect your lips, hugging him close with your arms wrapped around his neck and enjoying the tender moment as you distribute kisses around his face just to hear him giggle. And when you bring your mouth to his again, you barely feel the softness of his lips before he all but jumps on his skin. You pull back, furrowing your brows, ready to question it but he beats you. “Forgot I got something for you.”
“For me?” You blink. “What is it?”
“Go sit on the bed while I fetch, will be just a minute.” He gives you a quick peck before you’re pulling away.
You do as he asks, sitting back on the bed, right next to the wrinkled spot where you lied just  minutes ago. He walks across the room, opening the door where you came from and disappearing in the hallway. The record is still blasting through the apartment walls, sound coming louder now that there’s no barrier between you.
While he’s gone, you take a moment to look around his room, something you didn’t get a chance to do when you first came in tangled on his arms. It’s not much messier than the living room, really, only the small piles of clothes you’ve spotted earlier that give the illusion of an untidy room. There’s a light wooden dresser that sits next to the chest, and from where you sit you can see two candles standing alone on top of it, similar to the ones on the piano. 
You swing your feet on the edge of the bed, letting them brush along a blue fluffy mat that hugs the floor underneath it. And as you run your hands on along his mattress, you notice the soft superficie, making you look down at a knitted blanket spreaded across the bed. It’s made of different colored squared stuck together in an oddly comforting pattern. You want to lie down on it, and let yourself be swallowed by the cozyness of the material against your skin, but before you can do so, Harry appears back in the room, closing the door behind him as he makes his way to you.
“This blanket is so nice.” You run your hands through it, smiling at him.
“Thanks, I knitted it.” The information makes your eyes bulge out, you open your mouth to inquire further but he’s already talking again. “This is-- uhm, I dunno, just something I thought you’d like it.”
The small box in his hand catches your attention as he hands it to you, his eyes looking down at it and even with just the moonlight illuminating the room you can see the blush on his cheeks. He props himself down on the spot next to you, watching your fingers turn the rectangular box around. It’s a cassette tape case, you quickly realize.
When you gaze at the back of it, there’s names of songs scribbled behind it. Not many, but a good collection of them, from Fleetwood Mac to The Bangles, and even Billy Joel. And it doesn’t take you long to find a pattern with the song chosen for the tape. Their all love songs. It makes your heart swell even more, if that’s even possible at this point.
“These are so cheesy,” you bite your lip, barely able to contain your smile.
He rolls his eyes. “They’re romantic, bunny.”
You keep examining the titles written neatly in his handwriting, raising your brows when you land on a specific one. “Every breath you take?” You tease, “That’s an interesting take on romance.”
“Shut up.” He giggles, eyes watching you carefully. “Do you like it?” His voice is adorably hesitant, it makes your heart stumble on a beat.
“I love it.” You say in just above a whisper, feeling the butterflies in your stomach get a little more vivid once your eyes land on the last song scribbled in the back of the tape. Somebody to Love. Brushing your thumb over the words softly, careful not to smudge the paint, you look up at him to find his green irises glistening at you. You shake your head almost in disbelief at the tenderness behind the gift. “Did you record this just for me?”
“Uhm yeah some of them I did but—” He looks down, focusing on his fingers as they pick a loose string from the blanket under his leg. “Some of them I just... Sang”
“You sang?” It takes you by surprise, how you thought there was no way he could make you feel warmer.
“Yeah… All of them, actually.” His dimples dig deep on his cheeks as he quickly peeks his eyes at you. “It’s just… The quality is shit when you record it from the radio and the dj keeps interrupting and stuff.” He shrugs, “Thought if I sang it could be more, personal? I guess.”
“I love it.” You repeat.
“You do?” 
“I do.” You chew on your lip, watching his eyes glimmering on the dim light of the room. “Is there a reason for this sudden present?”
“Kind of I--” He clears his throat, fully glancing at you. There’s an expectation behind his eyes, you can tell from the way he takes a sharp inhale that he’s nervous. “Thought I make you-- ask you, actually, if you’d be mine?”
You can’t help but giggle at how adorable he looks, your eyes getting a bit glossy as you nod without a blink of a thought. “Of course I’m yours, Harry.”
“Yeah?” His smile grows. “As like, m’girlfriend?”
Throwing your arms around him, you press your lips against his cheek, careful not to drop the tape in your hand still. You pull back, tilting your head as giving him a fond smile. “As in your girlfriend, yes.”
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whentheynameyoujoy · 4 years
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Yup, Sure Was a Finale
I had an epiphany. The reason why I never re-watched the final two parts of Sozin’s Comet even though I’ve popped in episodes at random many times over the years isn’t that I can’t bear the sadness of seeing one of the best, most engaging narratives out there come to an end.
It’s simply that the finale isn’t all that good.
Some honorable mentions of what was enjoyable.
(+) This
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Just this.
(+) The Church of Zutara has another convert
“Are you sure they don’t get together?” Hubster, 2020
(+) The tragedy of Azula
And the fact that it’s acknowledged as such. I hope Zuko will do his best to get her help and have a relationship with her…
(+) Sokka being a big bro
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And the whole airship sequence in general. It’s wonderfully paced and plotted, with moments of humor, real stakes, Toph being both badass and a scared crying kid, Sokka strategizing and protecting, Suki saving the day, and non-benders being instrumental in thwarting the bad guy firebender’s plans. Would be shame if Bryke never portrayed them this capable ever again…
And now for the main course.
(-) Blink and its over
The wrap-up feels too quick (hashtag Needs More ROtK-style False Endings). A part of this is due to how fast the story goes from the thick of the action to hastily tying up a bunch of loose ends, but the larger issue is how Book 3’s uneven pacing comes home to roost. After spending half a season on filler episodes that at best subtly flesh out established characters while dancing around a huge lionturtle-shaped hole, and at worst contradict the theme of “no one is born bad” with “you’re a hot mess because your great-grandfathers didn’t get along too well”, the frantic “go go go” rush of the second half screeches to a halt with “they won and everyone was happy because now the right people have power and it will be all good from now on yup nothing more to deal with baiiiii”.
Yes, I know, it’s a kids’ show. But goddamn, this particular kids’ show has proven so many times it can do better than the expected tropiness. Showing the characters in their roles as builders of a new world was the least that could have been done.
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Oh well!
(-) Ursa
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We’ll never know. There will never be a story that delves into this. Yup. Shall forever remain but an intriguing mystery. Is good, though. Mystery is better than a story where Ursa shares her son’s penchant for forgetfulness. Imagine how embarrassing that would be. Speaking of which…
(-) What does Mai see in this jerkbender?
Look, I like to harp a lot on the mess of inconsistent writing that’s Mai but let’s unpack this scene from her perspective, shall we?
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Zuko forgot about her! It totally slipped his mind that the one person who prioritized the safety of his dumb ass was rotting in the worst prison in the Fire Nation—because of him! And she was rotting there long enough after the final Agni Kai for the news of Zuko’s upcoming coronation to spread and her uncle to feel sufficiently secure to release her. But then the coronation scene is attended by every single member of Gaang & Friends that was imprisoned?
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So what this tells me is that either a) the invasion force had the ability to break themselves out the whole time and for some reason decided not to exercise it until after the war was over, b) Zuko forgot about them as well and no one thought to remind him there were prisons full of POWs until Mai arrived, or, and that’s even better, c) Zuko took care to free every single resistance fighter while making sure Mai would be the one to stay behind bars.
Never thought I’d say this but Mai? Honey? You deserve so much better.
(-) “What does Katara want?”
Asked no one in the writers’ room ever, apparently.
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This is not so much anti Cataang as anti romance stories that pay attention to the needs, opinions, and wants of only one partner in general. Over the previous 60 episodes, Katara actively expressed romantic interest in Aang exactly, wait for it,
Once.
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And it got retconned out of relevance by the following two interactions where the possibility of a romantic relationship came up, making the Headband dance pretty easy to reclassify as just one of those examples where Aang “teaches” Katara to have fun (as if one of the main obstacles to her having fun wasn’t him constantly fooling around and offloading his duties). And because the writers not only didn’t succeed in portraying Katara’s internal state of mind, but also failed to root her reluctance to pursue a relationship in outside circumstances that could change, her sudden state of unconfused once Aang steps into the spotlight has a single canonical explanation that as much as approaches coherency.
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The fact is, though, that trying to interpret canon Cataang from a Watsonian perspective is an exercise in foolishness. Because there is no Watsonian justification for the ship and never has been. Bryke simply conceived of Katara as nothing but a tropey prize for Aang, never saw her as anything beyond that, and were perfectly happy to go on and immortalize her as a passive broodmare for the rest of her life.
And I fully intend to die mad about it.
(-) Iroh dips
OK, it’s been long apparent that the show doesn’t intend to do anything about Iroh’s complicity in AzulOzai’s regime in any meaningful way, and that his sole motivation for doing anything whatsoever is Zuko whom he views as a replacement son which is supposed to be good for some reason. But the finale has him abandon even that, and instead turns him full-on YOLO, idgaf anymore. It really throws Iroh’s supposed love for Zuko into doubt when his last act in the entire show is to take a half-educated 16-year old with no political savvy or an heir to secure a dynastic continuity and plomp him on the throne of a war-mongering imperialist regime where the entirety of the militarist and ruling class is guaranteed to fight him tooth and nail for power.
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(I sure hope Mai’s ready to start popping out babies by tea-time otherwise the whole country is fukd in about a week)
Christ, how hard would it be to have Iroh keep the throne warm for a few years while Zuko is getting ready to succeed him? Not only would it make the whole FN reformation bit quite likelier to occur, it would require Iroh’s hedonistic ass to actually sacrifice something for once. And not having Zuko ascend to power, instead spending some time bettering and educating himself first, would be a wonderful message that no matter what you endured and overcame, you never stop growing. A kids’ show, remember?
(-) The conquering of Ba Sing Se
Gee, I feel so blessed to have my attention diverted from battlefields which actually matter to an old dude vanity project I would have been perfectly happy to assume resolved itself off-screen.
The White Lotus in general just bugs me. I was fine with the individual characters and their overall passivity when they were portrayed as lone dissenters living under circumstances where it wasn’t really possible for any single person to mount a meaningful resistance. But as members of a far-reaching shadowy organization that’s left the real fight to a bunch of kids for 59 episodes straight and didn’t turn up until a perfect opportunity presented itself to take control of the largest city in the world and bask in the spotlight?
Yeah, no.
Similarly to the lionturtle-ex-machina, the White Lotus represents a huge missed opportunity for a season-long storytelling. Here’s just a brief list of what they could have been doing throughout Book 3:
orchestrating a Fire Nation uprising;
gathering those directly persecuted by AzulOzai’s regime to help Zuko keep his hold on power once he’s crowned;
establishing themselves as a viable alternative to Ozai;
sabotaging Fire Nation’s war efforts from the inside;
countering Fire Nation propaganda (Asha Greyjoy’s pinecones, anyone?);
running a supply network to alleviate the suffering of Earth Kingdom citizens.
Instead, they sit on their asses until the time comes to claim personal glory.
You know what, good on Bryke for making me conclude that in comparison, the Freedom Fighters were perfectly unproblematic, actually.
(-) Fire Lord Dead-by-Dawn
Yes, a kids’ show, I know! But ffs, this is the same kids’ show that came up with Long Feng and portrayed courtly intrigue, kingly puppets, secret police, spy networks, and information wars. Was it really too much of me to expect something other than “enlightened despot solves everything”? Especially if said enlightened despot has persisting anger issues, no personal support system, no base of followers, and no political experience whatsoever?
If Zuko’s actually serious about regaining the Fire Nation’s honor (i.e. by dismantling the country’s military machine, decolonizing the Earth Kingdom, paying reparations to everyone and their lemur, and funding any and all cultural restoration projects Aang and the SWT come up with), then there is no way, no way in the universe that he doesn’t face a civil war, deposing, and execution within a month.
One reason why his future as a Fire Lord seems rather bleak is that little’s been shown about the actual subjects of AzulOzai’s regime. While we get a vague reassurance that “no Toph, they’re not born bad” (le shockings), they largely remain a voiceless uniform mass of brainwashed clapping seals. What is their view on the Fire Nation’s crimes? Do they associate their condition with their country’s war-mongering? How will they react when Zuko starts dismantling the country piece by piece to rebuild it, bringing it to economic ruin? What will they do when noble Ozai loyalists come out of the woodwork and begin rounding them up under the banner of “Make the Fire Nation Great Again?”
I have no idea, and Zuko doesn’t either because he’s unironically more qualified to rule the Earth Kingdom than his own people.
You know what would have been better? Fire Lord Iroh, White Lotus pulling the strings to maintain the regime, and Crown Prince/People’s Champion Zuko travelling the Fire Nation with Aang and an army of tutors to promote the new boss, only to realize that absolute monarchy is kinda crap for the people he’s one day supposed to rule and gaining their support by ceding some power to them.
I’d laser holes into my TV due to how much I’d enjoy watching that.
(-) All hail Avatar Rock
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Literally and metaphorically. Aang doesn’t sacrifice anything, gets everything, and the clever solution of going about getting said everything is handed to him on a silver platter, requiring no active participation on his part whatsoever.
He doesn’t work to unblock his chakras, spiritually or physically.
He only speaks to his past lives to get a pat on the back and a bow-tied solution he could mindlessly follow.
Energy-bending doesn’t require any sacrifice from him, leaves no lasting marks, and only serves for the narrative to praise him as the rare individual that’s unbendable and thus so very very special.
The most infuriating thing is, however, that Aang is clearly shown as being able to beat Ozai without either the Avatar state, or energy-bending.
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And he chooses not to. From this moment on, Aang no longer fights to save the world. He fights to preserve his beliefs, going directly against the instructions of his past lives and effectively reneging on his duties as the Avatar.
Again.
It’s not like you can’t portray Aang’s faithfulness to his spiritual beliefs as the key to beating Ozai and saving the world. But that’s not what the show did. There is no link between Aang sparing Ozai and securing a better future, quite to the contrary—Ozai’s survival ends up being a massive problem for the continuation of Zuko’s rule, and consequently a threat to the world at large. His survival benefits Aang and no one else.
Aang’s spiritual purity and his status as a savior of the world are allowed to coexist only due to a deliberate stroke of a writer’s pen.
And I hate it.
Welp, nothing to do about it now except to bury myself up to my tits in fix-it fics I guess.
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sj-ficrecs · 3 years
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FIC REC SIX:
it’s been a min since I’ve done a new fic rec, so here we go. just a random collection of new stories (or new to me lol) that I’ve been enjoying! as usual, no specific order. 
This is purely a fic rec blog, always reblogging fics I enjoy. usually Bucky x reader, sometimes Steve x reader, Chris Beck x reader, etc. So check out more I’ve reblogged on this page. :) See my past fic recs below:
PREVIOUS FIC RECS HERE !
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Bucky x reader:
Reputation by @captainscanadian​ College!Bucky x Reader “There was a fine line between being study buddies and fuck buddies; a line that was never meant to be crossed until it was. All you wanted was to finish off your undergraduate degree, get a decent MCAT score and go off to medical school. But when NYU’s resident fuckboy offers to be your tutor, it seemed as though fate had a whole other plan for the two of you. His reputation precedes him, but you soon came to realize that there was more to Bucky Barnes than what meets the eye.”
107th by @baezen​ cop!Bucky x reader
“in which her hot cop neighbour asks for multiple favours and she can’t seem to say no to him”
Hearts in Secret by @jbbarnesandnoble​ King!Bucky Barnes x Princess!Reader “people always assume that princesses are free to do as they wish, to dress and act how they want to. In fact, it’s actually quiet the opposite.”
The Kid From Queens by @wkemeup​ Modern Army Vet!Bucky x reader (drabble from Sunrise) by @wkemeup​
“Bucky and Y/n take a trip to Queens in search of the boy Bucky saved on the day that changed his life“
Black Lace and Property Damage by @bitsandbobsandstuff​ Bucky x reader
“With your messy work hours, Bucky’s consistently inconsistent mission schedule, and those basic life tasks you’re both ignoring (when was the last time he actually bought a new toothbrush?), the simple act of just being together has been shunted to the side. Bucky’s officially starting to panic.“
Behind Enemy Lines by @writingcroissant​ 40s!Bucky x reader
“Bucky Barnes falls off a train right into the midst of a nation he swore to fight to his last breath. But instead of Hydra, he just so happens to be found by a young woman who risks her life in order to save his.“
Broken Crown by @lionoflannistarth​ Knight!Bucky x princess!reader
“James Buchanan Barnes is a knight who is in love with his childhood best friend, the royal princess. Both of them think, and for different reasons, that the princess’ betrothal is the worst thing that can happen. Until…“
Better by @captainscanadian​ Doctor!Bucky x doctor!reader
“Dr. James Barnes has it all: a loving family, caring best friends, and a successful career as one of the best heart surgeons in New York. He has everything he ever wanted his whole life… well, almost everything. One thing he never thought he could ever have was Y/N Y/L/N. She may have been a lot of things, but he loved her because she made him better.“
The Wilds by @moonstruckbucky​ Lumberjack!Bucky x reader
“After a bitter divorce, you seek solace in the wilds of Alaska. Unbeknownst to you, it’ll change you in ways you could have never imagined.”
This Town by @no-champagne-socialist​ Bucky x reader
“Y/N has been included as one of Earth’s Mightest Heroes for so long, that she considers each and every member of her team to be her family. So when the Avengers are torn apart from the inside, she takes the road less travelled to one of retirement. Y/N finds herself settling into a life of exclusion, but also one of safety and comfort, when an old friend comes knocking, asking for a favour.“
If I Could Fly by @ceeellewrites​ Actor!Bucky x Actress!Reader Social Media AU
“Bucky Barnes is an actor with a small (just a tiny) celebrity crush on Y/N L/N, one of the industry’s well-known actress. Well, it’s just a celebrity crush, what could go wrong?”
Long Way Home by @captainscanadian​ Doctor!Bucky x doctor!reader
“If the doctors don’t fix you, then I’ll become a doctor and I’ll fix you, Bambi.” While Bucky Barnes did not remember the promise he had made almost thirty years ago, he still kept it.“
Waves by @buckys-darling​ Prince!Bucky x Reader “Prince James Barnes of Montiero despises the spotlight and has been hidden from the public eye for years. You meet a stranger at the bar on your girls trip to a remote island. What’s the harm in a one night stand?”
Leather Jacket by @mymoonagedaydream​ Biker!Bucky x reader
“Your genius business idea seemed to have attracted the wrong sort of people to your brother’s bar- at first“
Rookie by @sebastiianstxn​ Detective!Bucky x cop!reader
“it’s the start of something new for detective Barnes and the rookie y/n but figuring out their relationship ends abruptly when reader gets unknown calls“
The Cat’s Meow by @moonbeambucky​ Bucky x reader
“On an effort to rescue a cat you didn’t expect to also rescue your love life.“
Know it All by @moonbeambucky​ College!Bucky x reader
“Your grades and patience are tested when you’re paired together for a class project with the one person you cannot stand, Bucky Barnes.”
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watevermelon · 4 years
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Cheating!Haikyuu x Reader
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✧ Summary: Akaashi and Kuroo getting caught cheating and begging you for forgiveness ➳ A/N: Honestly, I don’t think ANY of the boys would ever even consider it. They’re all so loving in their own ways and for anyone to actually do this would be absolutely horrible to their partners. ➳  Masterlist 
But ask for angst and you shall receive. kuroo’s is funny and akaashi’s is not
----- xXxXxXxXxXx-----
✧ Intro: 
You trusted your boyfriend of the past year explicitly. Your relationship was built on a mutual friendship, going from casual classmates to one day dating when he had asked you out. You were surprised to say the least, this was one of the members of the volleyball team. They were popular throughout school with the entire student body. And so for him to show interest in you? You honestly hadn’t believed it.
But as the months went on and a few became your everyday norm, along with even getting invited over his house to meet his family, you were sure that the man you were dating was the one.
You remembered the first time he kissed you, the first I love you that he ever whispered in your ears.
And so it broke your heart to find out that you were not the only one he was saying these words to.
The school you were attending was known to be a powerhouse regarding volleyball. You were proud of the national spotlight your boyfriend was fighting on. And you fully understood the times when he would be gone or busy for weeks at a time - whether it was for traveling far away for various training camps or just practicing long into the nights for upcoming tournaments.
You remembered the first time you saw it, the text that was very much not from you. The phone had vibrated while he was out of the room and you were not trying to be nosy - calling his name that he received a notification and glancing at it briefly through the motion.
I miss your lips on mine.
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You knew from the beginning that Akaashi always had a special connection to Bokuto. Even before you were close to the quiet setter, you admired how he always seemed to know how to lift Bokuto’s spirits. From the preliminary matches against Nekoma to just seeing the two in school, it made you want to foster such a close relationship with him yourself.
And on more than one occasion, you had to remind yourself they were just friends.
Your friends warned you ahead of time, that the two had a strong bond despite being separated by a year and not even attending the same junior high. You knew this and simply attributed it to his patience and overall ability to read people.
When you had once asked Akaashi about his relationship with the nationally acclaimed ace, he smiled and said, “He can be a lot to handle. But I love watching Bokuto-san play when he’s in the zone.” 
You took it a face value, instead relishing in the comfort knowing that your boyfriend was wrapping his arms around you.
Months later, with that insecurity pushed in the back of your mind, it all came swarming out at Bokuto-san’s text. There was no denying what you were reading or who it was from. It was even accompanied by owl emojis of all things - as if there was anything cute about your boyfriend’s affair.
Your attention was caught and you needed confirmation, scrolling up through their conversation and seeing similar words spanning the last few hours alone. Had he been texting Bokuto the entire time he was sitting here with you?
You threw his phone back on the couch and stood, moving before even thinking about how you looked. 
Why would Akaashi do this? Akaashi?? The kind, loving Akaashi Keiji who had the love of the whole school? Hadn’t he chosen you?
Standing in the middle of his family’s living room, you put a hand on your chest to steady your breathing. You felt the onset of panic gripping your chest, threatening to force tears to the corners of your eyes. There was nothing you could say, you just had to see if it was true.
How long had this been going on? Is it possible that this was before you were even dating? Why was Akaashi stringing along the both of you? Were any of the promises Akaashi told you true?
There was no denying the sudden jump of fear you had when Akaashi walked back in the room, a questioning look on his face as he saw you try to level your breathing.
“What’s wrong?” He asked.
As if he had no idea, no reason to truly think that he was the cause behind your unease.
You tried your best to feign a smile, but there was no point in hiding anything to someone as cunning as Akaashi, you figured. He was best at reading other people. Instead, you held your frown and motioned to your phone, “I got a bad text from my mom - I need to go home.”
Akaashi was already moving toward you, arms reaching out to steady you at the shoulders. He was such a comforting foundation for you. And yet now, his close proximity brought nothing but anxiety and anger.
He seemed to notice since Akaashi dropped his hands to his sides. “Alright, let me walk you home?”
You nodded in agreement, not trusting your voice. You worried that you were going to unintentionally spill out the word vomit - accusing words ready on the tip of your tongue. He still reached out to encase your hand in his own, silently walking side-by-side for the entire time.
Thankfully, you had different homerooms and could avoid him for the first initial hours of school the next day. Did you have a plan? Absolutely fucking not. But you knew that you had to see them together - see them in their element and see why. 
You needed to know the reason why Akaashi would throw away everything you built together.
You stayed silent to your friends, not even telling your best friend what happened. Not that you were afraid of Akaashi finding out that you knew somehow, but you wanted to see what was naturally between them, without anyone else’s interference.
Akaashi had thankfully given you your space, probably assuming that your family emergency from before was what was holding you down. It also helped that they had a practice match against Itachiyama at the end of the week, so he was called to practice especially more.
He always had such beautiful hands, despite the hours of practice he dedicated to his sport. It made you wonder what he did with them. There were a number of times before where Akaashi would text you late into the night, citing that Bokuto had demanded more practice with his spikes. 
Was Akaashi really setting a ball for five hours straight after your last mid-terms?
You had a million questions in your head as you sat in the stands with your friends, watching the game of Fukurōdani vs Itachiyama. Bokuto was at the top of his game today, none of his usual vices holding him down as he played against his rival, Sakusa. For you and the other students cheering on the team, it could have been easily seen as just another game.
But it wasn’t.
You watched how Akaashi’s gaze would sometimes linger on Bokuto, long legs guiding his stride to a spike. The ace seemed to fly above the net, passion for their shared sport radiating even up in the stands where you were sitting. The fond expression Akaashi had only brought up his earlier words to mind - I love watching him play.
The interaction was so strangely intimate and yet public for any spectator the game. The moment passed, time moving forward as you continued to analyze every smile Akaashi shot the ace. Bokuto’s raised an overjoyed fist in the air in his excitement over the single point. He yelled his usual, Hey! Hey! Hey! And while you found the action usually humorous, you could only stare in blank realization as Akaashi fondly smiled at the spiker’s words.
There was no rising panic this time, nothing inside you screaming at you that something was wrong. 
Your eyes kept following the scene, the game playing out while you stood stock-still among your friends. But your mind was already made up, long before the game ended. You thought about it a few times over the past few days, why Bokuto? Why you?
Why did Akaashi even approach you in the first place?
Thinking back to any conversations you had with Akaashi that surrounded volleyball. All their little volleyball antics - it was always about Bokuto. He got in trouble with the principal, got depressed during a game, even something as simple as being overly hungry before a match. And who was the one to always pick him up? 
Akaashi.
And this was not something that could be as simply waved off as teammates. Neither Haruki nor Konoha were like this with the ace and both of them knew Bokuto longer than Akaashi. Kaori had even joked to you once that Akaashi was capable of reading Bokuto’s mind.
You were a fool.
You hadn’t told Akaashi you were going to attend this practice match in the first place and you honestly had no intention of doing so.
Instead, you texted Bokuto during the game to meet you outside by the entrance stairs, alone. 
Most of the other students had already filled out of the gymnasium, out into the streets on their way home as you leaned against the cold railing. You could hear Bokuto’s quick steps around the corner before you even saw him.
“Hey, (L/N)-chan! What’s up?” He greeted you in a friendly manner, waving with one hand fully outstretched even though you were only a few feet away from each other.
You weren’t going to smile and pretend.
“Bokuto-san.” You stated, looking him in the eyes head-on.
Despite his amicable disposition, Bokuto had quite the intimidating disposition to outsiders. The tall spiker was built with muscles, arms and legs looking seemingly sculpted. And here you were, pointing a heavy glare with your chin held-high at a man who could very easily over-power you.
“Don’t smile at me like everything’s okay.” You started, “I know.”
His smile immediately squashed to a straight line, eyes hardening as they looked down at you. Bokuto crossed his arms, his athletic duffel pushed to the side of his body.
“I won’t apologize for being in love with him.” His voice rang through the calm outdoors, not a single soul to hear his confession other than you.
You scoffed, “How did I already know you’d say that?”
Bokuto kept your question rhetorical, for once staying uncharacteristically silent. His gaze never wavered off of yours, eyes boring right into you as you wordlessly sized each other up.
“I tried to let him go, once.” Bokuto continued, “When you first started dating, I tried and couldn’t.”
They were together before you were even in the picture.
You bit your lip, asking. “And you’re going to ask me not to make you do it again?”
Bokuto paused, uncrossing his arms and looking heavenward for the right answer. How could he? They were already on the road to love before you even really knew Akaashi. Why did he ask you out in the first place? Why progress this far in your relationship? 
None of this was right and you had every bone in your body screaming at you to beat the ever loving shit out of the two volleyball players. But there was one thing you needed to cut off now.
“I don’t need an answer to confirm what you’re thinking.” You stated, “Treat his heart kindly.”
Bokuto sputtered, raising his arms in defense. “Akaashi chose you - he asked you out!”
You almost snarled at the irony, “As if that matters! What’s a label against the fact that he’s been in love with you during that entire time?”
He recoiled, nothing to say against your true question. You were his girlfriend, but how could that possibly matter when his heart continually lingered on the ace in front of you. And, since the volleyball God’s hated you, it was no surprise when the setter turned the corner to your impassioned conversation.
“What’s happening here?” His voice rang out, meeting Bokuto’s worried expression and your hardened one. 
Akaashi stopped in his stride the moment he saw the both of you, not moving closer to you or Bokuto and simply guarding his expression from leaking any of his inner thoughts.
“I thought about this a million times over the past few days.” You said low, but voice strong enough for the others to hear. “How I would yell at you, curse you to your face... But now that I see you, you’re pathetic.”
Akaashi was the master of a blank expression, but now there was nothing but panic and hurt written all over his face. Whatever words he was going to say, to somehow excuse his behavior, died on his lips when you calmly raised your palm to stop him.
How dare he.
"I don’t want to know why you led me on for so long. Or why you decided stringing along Bokuto this whole time would be good to the people you claim to love.” 
Bokuto frowned, looking to the side away from the two of you, but said nothing to refute your statement.
“Don’t ever talk to me again.”
You walked away from Akaashi then, turning away and heading home without looking back. There was nothing left, no words that could ever explain or fix the situation, not that you wanted him to try either. Bokuto’s voice reached you mid-way through the steps, his words low but aimed toward Akaashi.
The words were low and you were surprised you were even able to hear them: She’s not wrong.
The next day at school neither of them were present.
You laid it all out to your best friends at lunch then, all of you sitting under the apple tree and quietly listening to your story. They offered you small condolences, never bringing up the volleyball team or practice matches around you ever again. Konoha shot you a wilted frown in passing, no words enough to even start that conversation.
You only saw Akaashi one more time. It was no surprise that Fukurōdani was progressing to the Spring Nationals and everyone at school were quick to congratulate various team members on their victory. You saw them, preening around the lunchroom as the student body wished them luck.
They were holding hands.
You lingered on the sight for a single second. But it was enough for Akaashi to notice your eyes, shooting a withered smile in your direction. 
There was nothing you wanted to do in response, nothing left for you to say and hope for when it came to the setter. And so you simply turned back to your friends, rejoining the conversation with thoughts of the volleyball team long behind you.
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You had to re-read the text three times, your mind whirling in circles to accept the fact that this was for your Tetsurō.
It was only when your hands flew to scroll upwards that you realized yes, this was really happening. It was all so quick - he had left the room to use the bathroom, or whatever, at this point you hadn’t even remembered why. Just his phone, which he always had on him, had vibrated away on your coffee table.
You grabbed it half-mindedly, original intention to bring it to him and maybe leave it at the door in case it was some type of volleyball-related emergency. He was the captain, after all. And so when the actual contents of the texts grabbed your attention, it was all over from there.
The profile picture was of the popular student body president, her shining face radiating even now. The other boys of the volleyball team had always complimented her and brought her up in conversation. Before you were even dating, you remembered that Kuroo particularly agreed with many of her features: long-hair, mild temper, and good grades even in college prep classes.
You were on the average scale of things - average grades in college prep, a member of photography club, but not particularly motivated - you were easily replaceable in the fast-paced world that Kuroo and others were constantly facing. And while you tried not to dwell on it too much, Kuroo was at the top of class with many of the female student body interested in him - there were times he had inadvertently made you felt small.
But Kuroo did try to wave those thoughts away, saying that you were the one he was in love with. It was only for you that he showed his soft side and only you were the recipient of his loving gestures.
And yet now you had in your hands evidence that none that was true.
You wanted to scream - reading all the affectionate phrases he had typed away to this woman.
Were you going to accuse him, then and there? What were you even going to say to him?
Kuroo made the choice for you.
“What are you doing with my phone?” He asked, voice promulgating the silent room.
You were sure that your eyes were glossy as you responded back quietly, “I was going to bring it to you when it kept ringing.”
“Thanks babe, just pass it over.” He said calmly, outstretching a palm in your direction.
You held the phone to your chest, there was no way you could feign a reaction now. This was no longer the simple interaction that you could pretend would pass over, the adulterous text was still open on the screen, open for both parties to quickly see.
His grey-eyes surveyed you silently, not a single word uttered, as if it would break this unmoving conversation. You always found his observant stare endearing, how his greatest weapon on the volleyball court was something he used on you to understand you better. 
And now, you could only imagine what he was truly thinking throughout your relationship.
Kuroo’s fond looks, those kind smiles, they were all calculated actions to keep you on his hook. They were not the loving terms of endearment you believed them to be. They were deliberate ways to sate your relationship, nothing more.
You frowned, handing him the phone and biting out coldly. “I want you to leave.”
“Listen babe, it’s not what you think.” Kuroo was reaching for you, taking steps to close the distance before you fled away entirely.
“Of course! What was I thinking?!” Your voice was raising with every word, anger seeping through toward the middle-blocker. “Some other girl texting you: I dream of waking up to you every day, could be some other context that what I’m too small-minded to know? Right?”
He followed behind you as you traversed through your empty house. You just wanted to get away from him, just the very image of Kuroo was enough to make you angry and inescapably hurt. There was so much you wanted to just yell at him, but at the same time you knew this was the man who held your heart.
And the same one who chose to break it.
What was there even to say to him? You’ve won? Congratulations? Get out of my house?
“Get out!” You settled on that and yelled behind you, your voice weak as you sucked in air between tears. Kuroo continued to follow behind you despite your loud command.
You pushed open the door to your bedroom and attempted to slam it behind you, but a simple kick of his foot and it stayed open. Instead, Kuroo closed it and locked it as he followed.
He had you cornered.
Would it be crazy if you jumped out the window?
Your eyes shot to the opening at the side-wall of your room, but it seemed his gaze followed your own path when he grabbed your elbow and pulled you to him.
Kuroo had his hands on your shoulders, trying to calm you down. “Please just listen to me.”
“Listen to what?” You were trying to push him away, but Kuroo refused to budge against you.
He leaned his chin against the top of your head, one of his arms going down to wrap around your waist. “Stop, you know I would never do anything to hurt you.”
“Then why...?”
“It looks bad. I know it does.” Kuroo started to explain, “But I can prove to you that this isn’t what you think.”
You sniffed, not saying anything as you waited for whatever bullshit response was already formulating on his lips.
What you hadn’t expected was for Kuroo to raise the phone to your ear, the ringing of the outgoing call blasting next to you.
What was he doing? Was he insane? 
You didn’t want to listen to her voice, listen to whatever she was going to say when she picked up the phone. Loving words, teasing innuendo’s, all of that you shared with Kuroo and now he was going to show-off what he had with another girl?
You twisted against him, ready to fight out of outrage of not only being cheated on, but also Kuroo doing the utmost stupid thing he could ever do and showing it off in front of you.
The voice that rang out froze you in your actions.
“Captain! Was my text really bad that you had to call?”
“... Yamamoto-san?” You near-whispered back in recognition.
You heard what was almost a yelp back. He stuttered over your name, before asking, “Ah, you and um. You and Kuroo-san are spending your day off together?”
Taking hold of the phone yourself, you looked at the screen and saw that it was indeed to the same student body president that the call was going through to. Same icon, same everything. So why was Yamamoto on the other side of the line? You looked up at Kuroo briefly, the middle-blocker staring at you right back. He urged the phone back to your ear, reminding you that Nekoma’s ace was still on the other side of the line.
“...Yeah.” You answered back weakly, remembering his initial question.
“... Was there something you needed?” He asked nervously.
“Um.” You bit your lip and looked at Kuroo, “Why is your name saved as our student body president in Kuroo’s phone?”
“Aasdfgh.” The strangled noise lasted for ten seconds before Kuroo cleared his throat next to you. “Captain! You’re there too!”
“Explain it, now.” Kuroo said flatly, his voice plain as his grip on your waist tightened. You put a hand on his chest in an attempt to keep him at a distance. You were still mad, admittedly also confused, but you didn’t want Kuroo to just hug the issue away.
Of course, he pushed your hand away and continued to hold you close.
“Please, don’t judge me (L/N)-san!”
Your confusion was only growing. “Um. What’s going on?”
“somycrushgavemehernumberbuticanttalktogirlsandididntwanttomessupsoiwaspracticingwhattosayonkurooandtherestandthentheygotmadsosometimesitextmyselffromtheirphonenumbersaspractice!” 
The words were so fast, you held the phone closer to your ear in an attempt to decipher anything that was just said.
“Wait, what?”
Yamamoto sighed loudly before exclaiming, “I can’t talk to my crush!”
You tilted your head in confusion, “... Kuroo’s your crush?”
The middle-blocker sighed above you, moving to flick your forehead while Yamamoto was near screaming in outrage on the line.
“No!! I.. I don’t have a lot of experience talking to girls! And then my crush gave me her number and she started texting me! And believe me, I tried practicing on otome games and even they dumped me!”
“Uhh...”
His loud voice kept going, explaining the strange tale, “And so I was begging the guys to help me practice and eventually they got sick of me too! She was really into me too and we were flirting and I wasn’t ready!! I don’t have anyyyy experience, (L/N)-san!!”
You shot a look up to Kuroo, his gaze locked on you without any other hints of an expression on. You were sure that your face was a mix of incredulous and worried, was this for real?
“And then she started texting me dirty things and I wanted to do it back, so Kuroo taught--”
“Skip it.” The middle-blocker stated harshly, cutting off the ace.
“Aasdafhauh.” Yamamoto outwardly struggled, remembering that both Kuroo and you, a female, were on the line. “I thought all was lost and then Kuroo let me practice texting myself and seeing how it looked from his phone!”
Oh.
lmao
“Wait, what?”
Kuroo summarized it plainly for you. “It means he was practicing sexting himself from my phone.”
“Ca-Captain!” His voice rang out.
You could not help your growing, amused smile. “Is it true?”
“I - well, yes...”
His voice trailed, but you held in your chuckle. “Ah, thanks for clearing that up.”
Yamamoto paused before asking, “Did my impassioned words led to a misunderstanding?”
“I’m sure your words are the least of your problems tomorrow at practice.”  Kuroo answered this time, earning an anguished exclamation before the middle-blocker hung-up and threw the phone away.
That was not what you were expecting.
Your mind was in a million places, not sure what to say and what you were just witness to. Kuroo pulled you along to your bed, near throwing you on top while you were distracted in your thoughts.
He hovered above you, placing a light kiss on your forehead and then trailing down the side of your face. You cupped his cheek, still trying to process what the hell just happened, but moved to slot his lips against yours and reassure yourself that this was real. 
Kuroo pulled away and whispered against your lips, “I know it looks crazy, but please trust in me - in us.”
You nodded silently, simply stating an okay when Kuroo continued to stare at you.
“I want this... more than just now in high school.” Kuroo looked to the side, before returning his gaze back to you.
Guiding his head back to yours, you pushed off your elbow to lean up to him. “Me too. I’m sorry for being so quick to accuse you.”
“Stop.” He murmured against your skin, small pecks following his wake. “I should’ve explained it to you before.”
“I mean, it does sound pretty crazy.” You joked, a fond smile growing on your face as Kuroo continued to shower your neck with small kisses. “To think you were flirting with Yamamoto of all people.”
“Oi.” A small scowl was already on his face.
You were ready to tease your poor boyfriend, “Sorry, you were sexting him.”
Kuroo rolled his eyes, a hand already sneaking its way under your shirt. “Why don’t I show you what I was teaching him?”
You felt your eyes comically widen at his boldness, any hint of your previous teasing falling away as your boyfriend’s sly smirk crawled further and further down your body.
The love you felt for Kuroo was undeniably mutual, but you had to learn to trust your boyfriend.
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oop lmao hope you enjoyed these short stories!
Come checkout some of the added-on endings to Cheater!Akaashi’s story: ➳  Masterlist 
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