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bee-rosmyth-art · 7 months

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In the past couple of months I have re-played Portal, read Blue Sky again, listened to the fanmix on repeat, got a Wheatley tattoo, read Blue Sky AGAIN, and am drawing tons of fanart, so I guess you could say I'm having a moment.

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vanadisvalentine · 1 year

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It's All About the Bees, Baby

Well, now that I'm done crying and laughing and screaming, I can finally take a moment to relax and put all of my thoughts about today's episode in one place. Full disclosure that I'm not going to be talking about fandom drama or anything because I have negative interest in engaging with that sort of discussion. This post is about what the bees mean to me and to others, as well as why the big scene today was so beautiful.

To start off on a personal note, I've been watching RWBY since I was twelve, so coming up on a decade now. I remember seeing a ton of fanart and memes for volume one as it was airing and decided to give it a shot a few weeks before volume two started airing. I dropped it in the first episode because the sound mixing was awful (apparently I've always been an audio snob), but decided to give it another go based on the recommendation of one of my long time friends, and that was when I realized it was basically the perfect show for little twelve year old Valentine. Great character designs, awesome music, I dug the humor, but more than anything, there was a particular character who I could not get out of my head.

Yang Xiao Long.

Yang is still to this day very much my type. Brash, bold, boisterous, blonde, brawler. I have loved this girl since the day I first laid eyes on her and I will love her to the day I die. As you can probably guess, being twelve years old is often a pretty rough period in a baby sapphic's life. I knew I liked girls, but outwardly admitting it to myself was something that took a long time, and Yang sort of galvanized that process, which really kicked off after Burning the Candle aired.

This is the moment that made me go "Oh. Oh, she's like me, isn't she?"

And it was all downhill from there.

I don't think I need to stress how prevalent shipping is in the RWBY fandom. For a show that doesn't focus much on romance (there are romantic relationships in the show that get significant attention and one of those ships was sunk six volumes ago), it might be one of the most notable aspects of the fandom. If two characters exist, even if one of them was dead before the series even started, there's a good chance there's a ship name for them...be they family or not. Looking at you, Enabler. That being said, Bumbleby--great ship name by the way, you guys--has been the most prominent basically since the start, with White Rose/Ice Flower following closely behind. This isn't really surprising. They're half of the main four girls and Blake specifically went out of her way to choose Yang as her partner, so them becoming a popular ship is a no-brainer, but the reasons as to why it's truly something special didn't become clear until the audience had learned more about these two as characters. Their backstories, what they strive towards, what motivates them, what scares them, all of that. They might seem like oil and water at first glance, but really, they're made for each other.

Alright, let's head in another direction before this just turns into a post about what makes their relationship great. Bumbleby is a relationship that is important to people for a lot of reasons, chief among those reasons being that people see themselves in these girls who have been through so much, both together and separately.

Blake Belladonna is, for all intents and purposes, an abuse victim, something that is unfortunately all too common (especially among the queer community). She managed to escape that relationship for a time and found family in her team, but her relationship with Yang has always taken center stage. I don't think it's lost on most Bumbleby fans that on the surface, Yang and Adam are similar. Semblances aside, they're both prone to bouts of anger, but one of the (many) differences between the two is while Adam was attracted to Blake for what he wants her to be--another violent revolutionary to take on the world with him--Yang likes Blake for who she is. She cares about her, truly, evident by the fact that she's the one who knocks Blake out of her self-destructive spiral in volume two. For so many victims of abuse, the notion of finding someone who will love you for you and won't treat you the way your last partner did is almost like a fairy tale, so to see Blake move on from Adam and overcome her trauma with Yang by her side resonates with a lot of people.

On the other side of things, there's Yang. She has abandonment issues, of course, which is something that doesn't really mesh well with Blake "My Problems Can't Hurt Me If I Just Run From Them" Belladonna. Come on, her semblance literally leaves behind copies of herself to take damage for her, but the show spells it out for you during Mountain Glenn, so you don't need my analysis here. The difference between Blake and Raven, though, is that Blake came back. Because she cares, and even if she made a mistake, she tries so hard to make it up to Yang. For a lot of people who have been abandoned or tossed aside in their lives, seeing someone who left a loved one behind not only come back for them but earnestly try and make amends is moving because it's something they think they'll never have, or it's something they've longed for but never got.

Now, onto the big scene from today's episode, Confessions Within Cumulonimbus Clouds. First of all, the fact that the Ever After itself said "You two have been making goo-goo eyes at each other since forever, go and work it out"? Gorgeous. Beautiful. You love to see it. What's nice about the framing of the scene is that Blake and Yang are put into a situation where in order to progress, they have to...well, progress. "Take the next step", which is to, of course, confess already. And how do they take those steps? They have to open up, say how it is they truly feel about each other instead of awkwardly flirting and making Weiss want to pull her hair out. And the more they progress, the more solid the rickety bridge becomes, symbolizing that they're getting closer and closer to finally clicking.

Even then, there's a contrast between the two of them. Blake, while nervous, is ready to take the next step. She's ready to finally say what they've needed to say to each other for ages. Yang, though? She's scared. Scared that she'll mess it up, scared that Blake won't feel the same, scared that she'll fall.

But in the end, even if she's nervous, she knows it's Blake. Her best friend, her partner, her soulmate. And Blake urges her to say it, and it's the push she needs to take that next step.

Part of what makes this scene so special to so many people is that when it comes to fandom and queer shipping, so much of it is implicit. Even for something that is obviously gay, like Madoka Magica, Homura never says that she is romantically in love with Madoka, and the unfortunate reality is that without that, queer relationships are often just written off as bait. Hell, just this last season of anime we were given The Magical Revolution of the Reincarnated Princess and the Genius Young Lady, a show that was commonly called bait even though the main characters makes it clear at several points that she is a lesbian who is attracted to the love interest. If there's no confession, it's bait. If there's no kiss, it's bait. So the fact that today, we were given both? It's so incredibly refreshing, because it is just not something that happens a lot in anime/anime adjacent media, especially not one as widespread as RWBY is, so people who mainly consume that type of art are left scrambling for crumbs, grasping at every glance or touch or smile, sustaining themselves off of fanart and fanfiction. You've got to understand that a lot of queer people--sapphics in particular--just...aren't used to this.

People have been clamoring over these two for a decade now. The hiatus between volumes eight and nine beat our asses, and we've been hyping ourselves up with "Bees kiss, bees kiss, bees kiss" since the trailer for this volume dropped, so to have it? To have it be real, be tangible, be undeniable? It feels good. It feels good to prove the weird ass homophobes who for some reason still watch this show wrong. It feels good to be vindicated. It feels good to be able to feel this joy.

We won, babes. We won. We can celebrate that, we can cherish that, and no one can take that from us.

#RWBY #rwby9 spoilers #rwby9 #rwby spoilers #yang xiao long #blake bellodona #bumbleby #sorry if this came off sorta rambly #i have a lot of thoughts and emotions right now #to all my fellow rwby sapphics #we gather here today to celebrate the size of this W #i cried watching the first time and bawled on like the twelfth #because it feels so good to be vindicated after years of shipping these two #and yeah shipping isn't all that but i hope this post explains just why it can mean so much to people #ok back to rewatching the scene ad infinitum

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64thyume · 11 months

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Ok Skip Beat! Fandom, idk if you’re out there, but I would love to have some thoughts on this article and the more problematic elements of the manga!

I’ve really been enjoying the series and I’ve almost caught up, but in the process of doing some fanart and looking for refs (I couldn’t resist the challenge of trying to make the men’s faces in this series make literally any sense in any other style), I came upon this article. It got me thinking… I originally got into Skip Beat about 10-15 years ago because of the anime, but I think maybe I caught up to the limit of what’d been published and got distracted. I forgot about it for the last decade, but in rereading it I did remember that some of the interactions between Ren and Kyoto made me uncomfortable. And on rereading, some of those elements still do.

I bring up Ren as the main concern because Sho and Reino aren’t good guys. They’re never truly portrayed as good guys. Sho gets some moments where he seems to be reminded that Kyoko is human, a hurting one and he’s seen so much of her hurt up close and personal that even his self-centered person can’t ignore it (setting aside of course what he did to her because that’s not only a blind spot but he’d have to admit he did wrong to her in the first place). He’s only focused on her because she’s become interesting and challenges him in a unique way (since she’s known him long enough to push all his buttons) & it’s only because she is a better person than him that she’s able to criticize/critique him in a way that actually helps him move past some of his problems. But in the end he’s still selfish: he wants to dominate her mind, very much like Reino does (maybe just less creepily???).

Ren however is supposed to be the good guy in the story. Of course, he’s got his mysterious troubled past. He’s still learning to accept the interest and affections of others on any level beyond the surface. I suppose it makes sense that he doesn’t handle things well sometimes. But Sho forces a kiss on Kyoko and while at fist Ren seems to be trying to help her reframe the situation so it’s less traumatizing, suddenly he’s threatening loss of his goodwill if she even lets Sho kiss her again, as if it’s her fault he did it in the first place. I think maybe it’s supposed to read more like (1) she needs to be less naive (which she does) so here’s an ultimatum to push her that direction & (2) a little funny because it’s unexpected with the way the conversation was going. But it still feels a little icky to me. It’s mainly his moments of possessiveness like this that bother me and while he seems to sometimes regret it or apologize, he never seems to learn a better way. He just has to “keep it in check” until Kyoko hopefully reciprocates his feelings and then of course it’ll be fine (which, yes, there are hurdles to that even because they both want to become stars and don’t want a relationship to destroy their chances, but all it does is extend that possessiveness issue to yet a further future date). Idk, it’s tricky…

The other side of what’s problematic is the way she deals with (or is encouraged how to deal with) her traumas. I think the articles talks a lot more about this issue and I find it… maybe overkill? Though definitely not completely without merit.

They say that the manga says there is no true hurt, only acting fodder, but I guess I find it more that acting is used a means for her to experience and examine her emotions in a context that feels safe for her. The scene in which she admits her feelings about Ren to the President actually felt very beautiful to me because she is encouraged (using the excuse of becoming a better actress) to see herself as she is in this moment, to consider it rather than run from it, to pause the emotional ride for a second and see herself (& thus acknowledge the depth of her feelings). But she (& even Ren) is encouraged pretty often to recontextualize painful things to such a degree that it feels a little less like learning to understand the other party’s perspective and that they’re human too (& thus have their own hurts), and a little more like “Realizing there were good intentions erases the impact of the bad things they’ve done.” This only sometimes feels like the case for me though. The article references the arc with Kyoto’s mother as an example, but it doesn’t feel that extreme to me. It feels more like being an adult and realizing that your parents are human too. It doesn’t mean that what her mother did was ok, but that Kyoko understands the why of it and that humanizes her mother to her. She expresses this understanding not just by saying that she’s been through something similar, but that she understands her mother’s feelings of shame have been projected onto her being, so she will become more than her mother ever imagined someone produced from a (perceived) shameful beginning could be. Yeah, some of their interaction is problematic and does feel too much like that good-intentions-erase-bad-actions thing (Kyoko later makes comments about a role being something her mother wouldn’t be happy with, as if she ought to be considering that when her mother hasn’t proved at all that her opinions on Kyoto’s life have anything to do with having Kyoko’s best interests at heart… besides maybe encouraging someone else to raise her?).

The article also talks about her putting everyone else first and being encouraged to do so over and over again to a degree that’s not love but rather self-harm. I think this has some truth to it. Again, it’s more of the same vein as the good-intentions-erase-bad-actions thing. But I do wonder if some of those examples the articles gives of this aren’t meant to be read so much as putting others first as it is that’s Kyoko is learning to be professional (you can stand up for yourself, and Kyoko does fail to do this sometimes when she really ought to, but putting curses on people won’t help you learn to interact with people you don’t like which is part of being a professional in any field), to experience varying levels of “love” from simple understanding and acceptance of the brokenness of people to true deep affection, and to experience many emotions and regulate them around others - all with varying levels of success. I think a person with such trauma in the real world learns to love others typically by being given a safe place to be real and be loved first, then they learn to understand and forgive and love others, so Kyoko’s story isn’t quite realistic that way. But over time, she finds some of that in Ren (in spite of his own issues), Kanae, the couple she lives with, and others.

Unfortunately, in my eagerness to catch up with Skip Beat I read through it SO quickly that these thoughts are more impressions than an actual analysis. I don’t own any of it, so I’d have to get it all from the library again to do a deeper assessment. That’s where you Skip Beat fans who are better versed in the series come in! I’d love to her more perspectives, especially ones willing to admit the flaws of the series but also celebrate its strengths - because it definitely has them! Kyoko could view other women as competition considering all her bad experiences, yet she doesn’t. Even with that though, she’s not perfect - which is great! She’s allowed to be so romantically minded and naive that it’s a flaw. She’s allowed to be angry and for good reason! She grows in her ability to forgive and thus frees herself from negative emotions she’d otherwise cling to (but mostly manages to not let that forgiveness turn into allowing people to walk all over her again, an important distinction).

“It’s all fodder for acting” might be true to some degree, but I think it’s more true that, for Kyoko, acting is a framework for self understanding and acceptance, even if that journey is deeply flawed. Maybe that just makes it more real to the flawed human experience.

We’ll have to see if the mangaka will refine and more strongly define those lines between love and possessiveness, between forgiving and accepting bad behavior. I really hope she does!

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dijanadraws · 4 months

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2023 review

Hi beans! I bring you an art dump of all my art made in 2023 because I keep forgetting this website exists. (It's c/pd from my Patreon, that's how bad I am.)

First up is a book cover I made for my sister (Daina Rustin - Demon Hunter, not published), that I actually started a year or two ago, but had the last push/rework in January and called it finished. I’m also adding the sword concepts I made for it, even though they were technically done in 2022, as I haven’t shared them before.

In February, I did some figure and hand studies with some friends on the NFC discord, and thumbnailed a bunch of locations and ideas for Sky Across illustrations. March was the beginning of my character concept art project for the main character of Sky Across - Aurelia.

Started with figure drawings, then outfit variations and explorations for different uses and settings. After that it was colour variations, and the last one is a finished character illustration. I also spent some time doing general research and working on worldbuilding, writing and designing certain elements that will be important for the story later on :>

At the beginning of June, I started working on a “props” section for my portfolio. I made it so far that I made a whole 3D/blender scene with them, and then…. I wasn’t excited about painting them. I kept pushing it around, sort of like pushing food around your plate when you have no appetite. After some time staring at that task in my calendar, I decided I would be better off doing something that ✨ sparked joy ✨ instead. So, I painted a new Witcher fanart piece. It was done in anticipation of the third season of the show on Netflix…. That I still haven’t finished. Oops.

July and August were a big dud for me, art-wise. I was going through a rough period and I was busy with real-life issues.

September was a big month for me as that was when my ADHD diagnosis was approved and I finally got medicated. I think I did more things (in general) in that first week than I did in the entire July+August. I finally saw the bottom of my dirty laundry basket after 7 years.

Art wise, I did another bunch of thumbs for my Sky Across illustration, I set up the references I needed in Daz3D and Blender, and I got an offer to work on an exciting freelance project so I jumped on the research and thumbnails for that as well. The project is still in progress, and I'm looking forward to sharing it next year!

September was also when I drew Hopper, Nickie’s cat, in pencils. I used to do a lot of traditional art in the past so I didn’t think it would be complicated, despite not having drawn a realistic cat in over a decade…. I always forget how humbling traditional work is. Nickie visited my hometown and I travelled back home to meet her and see my family <3

I got a cold as soon as I returned and that slowed down my zoomies for a few weeks, some family/personal issues happened, and I had to start branching out before I was ready to - which is how Patreon and Twitch came to be. The rest of September and October were spent on YouTube researching and developing “passive” income ideas.

I won’t be talking about Oct/Nov pieces as I’ve already done that in the previous few posts. In short, art zoomies picked back up in October, I managed to knock out some presents for friends and some fanart pieces, only to be absent for the majority of November again because I had/was recovering from Covid. (I’m still coughing 💀)

Over the course of the year, I did some animal drawings as presents for friends - Joe’s wonderful sassy corgi Dennis that I'm plotting to kidnap (at least for a day, if I ever make it to the UK), Joel’s cat Kissa that looks like someone spilled ink all over, Isla’s cat Skye that has seen all of the horrors of the universe, and I’m cooking something up with my own cat - Azriel.

I started working on another illustration for Sky Across featuring the same character I concepted at the beginning of the year, I'm streaming the process on Twitch when I can, and I started a little banner illustration for socials that I noodle on from time to time.

There were a few bits and bobs that I don’t feel are worth mentioning, and some Blender practice things that aren’t really worth sharing but were great practice.

All in all, this year was mostly marked by a million doctors’ exams, a big focus on exercise/physical therapy, dealing with ~feelings~ about medical issues, and general financial uncertainty. But also more art than I made in a long while, so swings and roundabouts!

I'm really proud that I've managed to handle and organise so many health-related things, and I'm getting better at judging how much I can do and schedule for myself, recognizing when I need to take time off and when I can afford to push things. I hope to do more original illustrations and concepts next year, and I’m adding traditional art to my calendar for next year as I’ve been itching to experiment more. I’m very grateful to my family and friends that held me up, I wouldn’t have been able to manage without them <3

Hope you have a successful 2024 and may all your dreams come true!

Until next time,

xo

PS: INPRNT is running an end of year sale, and you can get my art for an extra 20% off with the code: OQKQS6DJ

#dijanadraws #dijana #art #digitalart #digital art #painting #illustration #drawing #fanart #seventeen #s.coups #yoon jeonghan #the witcher #henry cavill #digital #2023 #year in review

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eggoatt · 8 months

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Hi! I know I left a comment on my reblog, but I felt the need to send something a little more heartfelt. I'm going to try to be normal about this lol

That picture you drew was the first thing I saw this morning, and it has been sitting on one of my monitors ever since, just so I can glance at it any time I want—which quite honestly has been incredibly frequent.

It might seem like I'm a little too excited about this, but it's a huge deal to me. Before I started putting fics out (just south of a year ago now) I hadn't written anything in nearly a decade, so I didn't really have any expectations for what I put out. Of course, I thought about how cool it'd be if someone drew something directly inspired by something I wrote, but I always considered that a kind of a lofty thing? Would be nice if it happened, but I wasn't expecting it. And if it did happen, it'd probably happen much later on when I'm a little better at writing.

All of that to say this is the first time I've inspired anyone to make art from my material. That means so much to me and I am unbelievably grateful to you for that. Also, WOW, it's from someone who has also drawn one of my absolute most favorite SciSet pics ever too?? I adore the way you draw Sunset, so when I saw this was from you I actually gasped so loud my wife heard me from the other room lol.

I mentioned this briefly in my reblog, but I really love the way this picture is composed. When I write scenes, they tend to play out in my mind in full motion with great detail, so what I envision can be incredibly specific, yet I really feel like you managed to capture details I hadn't really put words to. The color scheme in particular—lots of blues and purples, but with just the right amount of saturation to match the pink. Visual arts are not my forte, so I apologize if that doesn't make the most sense.

Lastly, I would like to ask just a couple things:

Would you be alright with me posting a blog about this on fimfic? This might seem like kind of a weird question, but I always like to make sure I clear this kind of thing with someone first. Naturally your username and links to everything would be prominently featured.

May I put this in the author's note of Chapter 8(b)? Just like before, your username and links will be prominently featured alongside it (also, if you'd like to send me a watermarked version, I'd be alright with putting that up too). I just really love this picture and would love it to be the way people visualize that part of the chapter, but I want to make sure that's alright with you first, and I also want to make sure you get the credit you deserve.

Anyway, I won't ramble any longer than necessary. Sorry for throwing a book in your inbox, but thank you for the picture, and for ensuring that no matter what else happens today, I have something to be happy about 🥰

hi!!

we've actually been mutuals for a little while (you reblogged something of mine, and i liked your taste in horse content) but back in april by complete coincidence i stumbled across your fimfic account as well and kind of fell in love with your work. the way you write sunset, your inner voice for her, speaks to me on an insane level to the point where it's informed some of my personal projects (ocs) a bit. i also really enjoyed seeing how rapidly and drastically your writing had improved over the works you had up at the time-- it made me really excited to see what you would do in the future! i even made a new account and started using the site again just so i could keep up :3 if nothing else, you've touched this creature's heart very deeply

like i said in the original tags, i've been meaning to make fanart of this scene for MONTHS and finally releasing those brainworms felt a bit like an exorcism, lol. i'm so happy i hit the mark and brought you as much joy as you've brought me !!!!

to answer your questions!:

sure!! it is fanart For You after all

same as above, go for it :3 (it is actually watermarked already! i prefer making it difficult to see so it's not distracting. take a closer look at sunset's elbow)

silly bonus trivia about the drawing: i needed a visual reference to help me with the poses, and the best ref i found just so happened to be a picture with obama in it. it's not my fault they look so tender

#woofbarkmeow

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olivia-y113 · 8 months

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Last week I went to Edinburgh for the Fringe Festival, and while there I visited the National Galleries of Scotland. I'm not exactly well-versed on art history or artistic techniques, but something about this painting (Achilles Lamenting the Death of Patroclus by Gavin Hamilton) really caught my attention. I'm only vaguely familiar with the story, so later I did a search on it, and was properly fascinated.

Something else that came up a lot is fanart for the book The Song of Achilles by Madeline Miller. I've started reading it, and I think it's something I would've loved had I read it when I was a lot younger, like when it was first published (2011). As it is. I find some of the prose verging on the purple, and the phrasing reads like fanfic-cliches (mind though they might not have been cliches a decade ago). It's enjoyable enough, I just think I've missed the window of being the target audience.

I also watched a few scenes from Troy (2004) with Achilles and Patroclus. Given the time the movie was made, I know Hollywood wouldn't have gone there with their relationship, but it was still funny that they felt the need to emphasise the cousin aspect. I know they were related (although I believe Patroclus was supposed to be older?) but it reminded me of the dub of Sailor Moon where they made Neptune/Uranus 'cousins' to protect kids from terrifying same-sex relationships.

Speaking of which, I find it odd there are debates on the sexuality of Achilles and/or Patroclus. It seems like the Ancient Greeks (and their gods) just did whoever they wished - though obviously relationship dynamics vary greatly - and there's little point in trying to label any of it.

#Achilles #Patroclus

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rookthethird · 1 year

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the earliest recorded game of Goncharov. also, I'm lying

Goncharov (1973) motion picture score

What follows is an essay on the earliest known game of Goncharov. Also, I'm lying.

~

I'm obsessed with this essay-game -- On Goncharov by Hy Libre!

Even that Frankensteined term feels like an incomplete answer to the question "what is this piece to me?" (A question I asked myself, of course. This will be a recurrent theme.) Whatever I call it, this thing hit me squarely in the ribcage because I've played Goncharov before.

Please indulge me. I want to tell you about another seed.

Our freshman year of high school, my deranged theatre friends and I played Goncharov for an audience of one: our friend, my recurrent scene partner, and our theatre group's "leading man" -- Jeff. To this day, several of us remain fierce friends and constant collaborators, including Jeff and I. He is one of the most blisteringly skilled artists I know.

Together, our ragtag crew (minus our target) made up an anime called Demon Tomes. We embellished the stage with fanart, headcanon rants, and even one whole gif. It worked. Jeff believed and, much to our delight, joined us in the fandom. But now, as I'm writing this a decade later, a thought occurs. Did Jeff ever search for a Demon Tomes tag on Tumblr? We were all active in various fandoms there; surely his first instinct would be to search for footholds?

Either he never bothered to investigate beyond our conversations, or he made the arguably "stronger" choice as a performer: he searched for this cool new anime, found nothing, andjoined the scene anyway.

We knew/know him very well. We crafted Demon Tomes specifically for him. In retrospect, that curation probably sold the fantasy. Drawing each frame for that gif of the Caretaker smoking, I didn't have Jeff at the top of my mind, but he was there nonetheless. Swimming somewhere fathoms deep.

But perhaps if you're quick when spotting ethical quicksand or familiar with the emotional dangers of method acting, you've already called foul in your head. And I wouldn't blame you! Perhaps if you were here with me, you'd say -- Hey Rook, the difference between Goncharov and Demon Tomes is that the former involves thousands of willing players who are in on the joke, whereas the latter involves one unwitting player who is perhaps the punchline. Couldn't that be considered a gaslighting prank?

I have thought about this a lot myself. I put myself in Jeff's old boots and ask, "would I enjoy this if I were in Jeff's position?"

Spoiler: Jeff did. This is more evidence for him knowing all along. He expressed nothing but delight from overture to plot twist to curtain call. And he absolutely could and would fool us jesters like that. He once had me guessing his three middle names based on initials for years, only to yank me offstage with a casual "oh, you already guessed them years ago, but I won't tell you which guess."

So Jeff loved Demon Tomes, and perhaps he was the director all along. But Jeff and I are very different in many ways. April Fool's day makes me cry. I'm painfully gullible in the face of deception without logic. Every time I think: "why would they lie about something so inconsequential?" Thus, I'm a sitting duck for pranks and Ihatethem. Pranks affect me so adversely that as April Fool's approaches every year, I remind my loved ones that they shouldn't prank me unless they want to witness me melting down on the spot.

I could write endlessly and aimlessly about this, but my ruthless chronic pain acts up more when I type for prolonged periods. It's become so agonizing that I can no longer draw, and I have no indication it will ever improve. My first love, my longest pursuit, my most-honed skill. My career. Each and every one, names for the same dead sapling.

Jeff is perhaps the only person I've told about this grief who can perceive the vast meaning of the loss. He and I have very different practices, styles, and trajectories -- but we've both been drawing for about the same number of years. Which is to say: our entire lives, if you count the way I do.

Jeff and I both graduated with razor-sharp skills and beautiful portfolios from meatgrinder, prestige-belching institutions. But Jeff went to art school, and I went to theatre school. We both got messed up in special ways, curated to us as individuals, and we paid for the privilege. For a long time, I thought the best metaphor for my time as an acting student goes like this: You know how when a caterpillar contorts its own body to rend its way out of a cocoon? But now I know that's a lie. I may have written it, but it originated with my professors. Caterpillarsmust undergo pain to transform and fly. My acting "training" was abusive. Abuse is not what's "best" for the person being abused. It is violently, ruiningly unnecessary.

If I ever escaped my cocoon, I didn't do so in theatre school.

I did so right here, just now.

~

for the caretaker playlist

What follows is the game of my life, as thanks for the benediction.

~

The village of Roxaboxen lies in a one-acre wood. You are the local mapmaker who lives by the fallen oak. You spend your days drafting ever-more specific maps of the acre. This requires a steady hand and an inquisitive eye. Travelers arrive and depart, but some stay long enough for you to learn their names, their mannerisms, their fears. You sketch them in your free time and trade them maps of the surrounding area for shards of sea-glass.

There’s the hunter. She moved silently and took several spoonfuls of sugar in her tea. Then there’s the blacksmith and his brother, who picked up odd jobs around the village and has a gap in his teeth. The blacksmith worked with thunder-metal found in sheets in the one-acre wood, so named for the sound it made when shaken. You remember that low, rolling sound. And Luke, you remember Luke. He stayed the longest. He taught you how to fold a piece of paper into a scorpion, how to throw a knife, how to laugh without trepidation. The other travelers still pass through every once and awhile, but you know you’ll never see Luke again.

Roxaboxen has changed over the years, shifting around you like roots enveloping a stone. The treehouse was built, and visitors from all over painted on its walls, and then, after years, it collapsed in a storm. Pets get old and die. Gardens bloom. Things are always rising up and caving in around here. Growing, decaying.

Thankfully, your younger sister -- the local tinkerer -- is a constant. She once fashioned a functional axe handle out of a porch spindle. She’s dormant dynamite, full of potential energy. Although you’re the mapmaker and she’s the tinkerer, she’s the one who has ventured all over the outer lands. She brings back scraps for her work and artifacts for you. A small wooden box filled with teeth, a stone etched with unknown symbols, curiously strong magnet. She will always come back.

Your task, too, stays the same: map the one-acre wood with increasing detail. You take to mapping the deer trails through the tall grass. The footprints of a hurried chipmunk. The slime-path of a slug which spent the day sliding across your front step. You take to mapping the stars. There, the kite constellation. The mongoose. The scorpion, for Luke. You look up, and you look down. The universe spreads in all directions, endless, and you will never see more than a fraction of it, let alone map that fraction. You have fashioned yourself into an authority on the minute details of Roxaboxen. You’ve charted the residents’ daily routines. You’ve mapped the rambling paths of sleepwalkers. And for what? You will never be able to capture the totality of this place, or any place.

What use is a mapmaker who won’t venture beyond their one-acre world?

So, today, you’ve decided to leave. What’s out there? Have you brought enough ink? Do you have your pencil-sharpening knife? How many people will think of you once you’ve left? Will they remember your name? Will you remember theirs?

Who knows you now? I mean, really knows you?

When will you come home? Will you ever? Why not? What’s wrong with home?

Who do you think you are?

Are you scared?

Will you go anyway? ~~~ my other games

my other stuff besides games

#goncharov #indie ttrpg #ttrpg #memoir #unreality #poetry

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madebysamael · 2 years

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To everything there is a season...

A while back I vented on Tumblr about feeling like I have the time for art, but not the energy.

Well, turns out I had undiagnosed hypothyroidism at the time. It's mild, but I've been on levothyroxine for about four weeks now, and the difference is already remarkable. I'm more awake in the mornings (do you constantly feel like a zombie until about 10? That's not an inevitable part of the a.m., turns out, even for someone in their 30s). I walk more - I walked for an hour yesterday just because I could! And my to-do lists have a much greater ratio of check marks to empty boxes.

My evenings are often filled with art now. I've been sewing, practicing watercolor, making jewelry. I even signed up for a couple of craft shows again - first time since 2019! I'm super nervous about it, but I missed working them so much. I can't wait to dip my toes into selling my work again.

But the one thing that hasn't really come back is... fanart drawing. And tbh, I'm not surprised. Because the reason I fell out of it has less to do with energy and more with motivation.

I'm burnt out of the fanart scene.

I've known this for a long time, on some level. The inspiration comes in waves - and right now we're stuck in the doldrums. Creating fanart feels less like an expression of joy for a certain media, and more like a chore done to appease others and not myself.

I've been dissatisfied with my art style for a long time. It isn't nearly as beautiful, elegant, or expressive as I want it to be. And the time I spent on most recent pieces hasn't felt worth it.

Of course, I get discouraged when my pieces don't "perform" well on social media too - and lately, engagement has been plummeting. Sometimes, the boost from a well-received piece gets me through the self-doubt I feel when it doesn't turn out like I wanted. That's part of what has kept me making for so long. Art has been something to share with others, something that gave me a purpose and made me feel like I was part of a community. I was contributing something valuable to others' lives and making this shitty world a bit less awful for them.

But honestly, that just isn't enough right now. And often a lack of engagement just makes me feel worse about what I've made. (I gotta admit, spending 30 hours on a piece to only get two comments, across all social media platforms? Not motivating. Not making me feel like that piece was worth so many hours or like it brought any additional value to the world. At least I learned some important artistic lessons from it.)

I spent most of my life learning to value myself solely based on the praise I receive from others. (If I ever get around to drawing that auto-bio mini-comic I scripted, "Selfish," this is in part what it's about.) I'm trying to undo this terrible lesson and teach myself that my art intrinsically has value, even if I'm the only one that sees it. But I need to create something I'm proud of for that. And I haven't felt proud of my drawing in a long while.

I still have a couple pieces in the queue to share, but overall, the field of fanart inspiration is going fallow. Perhaps resting for a while will allow it to grow back stronger next season.

(Nearly a decade ago, my mother-in-law made a gift for me: a scrapbook page turned into a dry-erase board. I use it as a to-do list for art projects. There's a Bible quote on it, the only one visible in my very atheist house. But it seems fitting here:

"To everything there is a season and a time to every purpose under heaven." -Ecclesiastes)

#personal

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sunsetofdoom · 1 year

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SUNSET!!! ❤️🎨👑

❤️ What is your favorite line that you’ve written in a fic?

Favorite line always feels like a daunting question- so many of my favorite bits are conversations or paragraphs. But lemme look.

Oh! I really like this bit in the second chapter of all my life:

When they’d finally made it up to the Solarium during the Liberation, journeying through secret passages that Avad had had memorized since childhood, Ersa took one look at the throne wrapped in bronze bars and told him, it looks like a cage. One of those fancy ones, to keep a songbird in.

Ever since, the image blazed in his mind whenever he sat down. He felt like a bird now, battering against the bars.

... this has nothing to do with my love of boys in cages. No further questions.

Or some of the descriptions from one safe place, just one safe place, like this one:

He closed his eyes, and the thick golden light of the ranch house appeared, the smell of his mama’s kitchen and the swish of her skirts. “I remember that I ran home crying, once, ‘cause… We argued, and he hit me? Must’ve been it.” He could feel the miserable memory in his face and hands: six years old and full of more sadness than a body could hold, burying his face in his mama’s lap as he cried.

I remember @miss-spooky-eyes in particular pointed this line out as Making Her Feel Things, a capitol crime. I looove writing Corso's intertwined grief and nostalgia, it's so juicy.

Or my new Owl House WIP, in which Willow gets her glasses broken in a fight right before she meets Hunter for the first time-

Willow turned and shut the enormous doors of the school she was never going to see again, not really caring if the Golden Guard got in after her or not. A few hours ago, she’d have been full of awe for the famous warrior who’d stood at the Emperor’s right hand for decades; right now, he was just a big shiny blob, which kind of killed the reverence.

I just think this is funny for some reason.

🎨 If someone were to make fanart of your work, what fic or scene would you hope to see?

Fic that exists: I've always kind of wanted art for all my life I've been running towards the fight, that beginning section where Aloy and Ersa are awkwardly talking in Dervahl's workshop and Aloy very much doesn't know how to look or not look at a freshly-tortured woman with her tits out. (Doubly funny if one headcanons Aloy as a lesbian.) And one safe place, just one safe place is one of my favorite fics I've ever written, but I've never gotten much art of Teo and Corso, mostly because I hate commissioning people; I can take screenshots of the game, but it's not the same. I also had ambitions of paying @sleepswithvillains to draw a tasteful (if thirsty) nude of Nan, to get her body type straight in my head, because Sleeps is the only one who Really Gets It.

Fic I have in my head: later in all my life, Ersa was supposed to get hybrid Carja-Oseram tattoos over the scars on her chest; my gf designed them, but I've always wanted to commission art of them actually on her. Ended up booted out of the HZD fandom before I could get around to it, lmao.

And I'm working on a piece about my OC Yehlise and @pineaberry's Rend, both of which I'd love to get art of. Yehlise in particular is pretty un-make-able in the SWTOR engine, lmao.

👑 Do you like writing short fics or long fics?

I enjoy writing short fics. I aspire to write long ones, and unfortunately at the moment that's all my brain wants to give me.

(fanfic ask post here)

#i want so much art in fact that it would be way more convenient #if i either got over my fear of commissions or learned to draw #unfortunately im incapable #i tried to focus on Horizon stuff for foibles' sake lmao #i miss it a little

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drbtinglecannon · 1 year

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Hi, friend! 💖 I hope things have been looking a little brighter for you, and if not, I'm manifesting it for you!

Now, for the ships ask game... Ikesoren and Raeda? 👀

You're always so sweet ;__; the cats have been really good lately so that's been a positive, thanks for checking in!!!

Ikesoren & Raeda my beloved. They both mean so much to me

Ikesoren

1. What made you ship it?

Ok so funny story I actually unknowingly played RD before PoR (one of my older brothers bought it for another older brother so we didn't realize it was a sequel at first), so I had only the sequel's dynamic to go off of, and RD didn't have the in depth support system that PoR does. I did end up going back to play PoR right after beating RD and I think through the process of playing both games in order to do all the bonus shit to get Ike & Soren's secret ending conversation I was ride or die by that point. When I played RD the first time almost every support I paired up was based on aesthetic alone since there weren't actual convos & you could literally pair up anyone -- it was fucking lawless haha. Since I didn't have the previous knowledge of who had what rapports I got a TON of the pairs I made wrong based on what friendships/relationships I ended up liking best after playing PoR hahah! Ikesoren was unfortunately one of them

2. What are your favorite things about the ship?

Upon first glance you'd think they'd be an 'opposites attract' kinda dynamic but they're actually the same stone-faced smartass. I also love how Ike can't get an ending with a woman, it's either Soren or Ranulf, like the Tellius games really got an unequivocally gay Lord

3. Is there an unpopular opinion you have on your ship?

I don't really know what the popular opinions are, but based on fanart & fic I can recall seeing over the last decade or so, I don't like when Soren is portrayed as timid or shy. Like Soren's a bit of a bastard, even to Ike, he's not gonna get all 😳 around him, the neutral look of displeasure is his default expression even with the love of his life haha

Raeda

1. What made you ship it?

The second we saw Raine and could tell that was the kid Eda had her arms linked with from that S1 photo I was like "👀 ok ok finally learn that history!" Then Eda's smirk as she taunts "how are you supposed to be HeAd BaRd with stage freight?" I was like "omg snark, there's some bitterness but that's such a fond smile on her face" and then when they reunited? I was gone. By the time we saw the duet scene I was ride or die for Raeda. I genuinely believe we'll get a wedding montage at the end of W&D, or at least a kiss. Those two are extremely important to me

2. What are your favorite things about the ship?

They hit every note! They're childhood friends, they were immediate best friends, they're equally chaotic despite appearances, they're exes, they've been carrying the torch for each other SINCE they broke up like 20yrs ago, they're both blushing messes around each other, the mutual pining, the fact they're older & grayer but still undeniably smitten with each other, they have their own flower that means "deception and graciousness" WHICH PERFECTLY SUITS THEM, Eda's a harpy & Raine's a monsterfucker! They just! Really mean a lot to me, getting to see old gray queer love combined with the chance to repair old relationships

3. Is there an unpopular opinion you have on your ship?

I don't really vibe with art that makes Raine look or dress a lot more femme than they present in the show or in Dana's art.

#asks #answered #thanks for asking sorry it took a bit to reply haha #i know i talked more in raeda but ikesoren is one of my all time fav ships in all of fe haha

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milkovski · 2 years

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hello can I ask how you got into drawing? it's something that i want to do for a long time but I don't know where to start 😔

hello!!!! this answer is going to get nerdy as hell look away. this is also going to be a lot of long, boring story time bc I like reminiscing abt this and i like talking and im painting a story of my journey!!!! but I will also try to give like semi-useful information at the end?? It's long so under the cut:

Thinking way way back to when i was a little kid doodling, the thing that got me most into it was manga/anime (i think this is evident in my style?). I think i was prob vaguely into drawing cuz of like, Sailor Moon, but I definitely remember the moment I REALLY got into drawing was when someone introduced me to Inuyasha (*fondly thinking of grade 2 elementary school*). I got obsessed with the manga, trying to redraw my fav scenes, eventually drawing the characters (well, just Kagome for the curious heehee) from memory. I did this for years. I got into other manga/anime and eventually started emulating those styles. I think the thing that must've really spurred me on, though, was finally being online and seeing what other people were drawing and being like, I want to be able to do that.

Reading a lot of manga is a lot easier online for obvious reasons; I consumed a lot. Meanwhile I continued looking at other artists' art. I got a tablet and drew. I really got into Smackjeeves (shout-out to anyone who remembers this site) and was super impressed that people were drawing their own characters and comics. I created my own characters (with the intention of drawing a comic someday. this will never happen but to this day I still draw and think/write about ocs I created like a decade ago!)!!! Eventually I found my own style. But obviously incorporated bits and pieces of what I liked/learned from other artists into my own art (i like the way this artist draws mouths, i like the way that artists renders eyes, let me try that. etc.). I really got into various pieces of media (which I won't name gasdfgd) and was really inspired to draw a lot of fanart, and post it to tumblr.

For various reasons I won't go into because they sound annoyingly self-deprecating, I never really had a lot of artist friends. But I joined twitter and finally made a few, and it was a lot easier to talk to people and be talked to on twitter (tags are so awesome I love reading every single one!! but it's much easier to reply to comments on twitter). they had cool ocs and cool art and like, for the first time ever people were commenting on my original art (which is a great feeling) and I spent a lot of time and effort developing ocs. Continued to get into various media and draw fanart.

Over the years, inevitably there have been times when I drew almost nothing at all (school kept me busy, or I just didn't feel like it) and stagnated or got worse. And there were times that I just like improved super quickly because I was drawing so much. And I was drawing so much because I was really inspired because I was so obsessed with whatever I was into at the time (whether that be a piece of media or my own ocs) and having fun.

So I hope the thread throughout this answer is at least somewhat clear. If your question is how to start drawing it's as simple as seeing something you like, picking up a pencil and trying to draw it. if your question is what's the fastest way to improve, draw as much as you can - it helps to find something you really, really like! You'll naturally want to draw a lot, and draw the subjects in all kinds of situations, and convey your ideas. Look at other peoples' art of the subjects. If you can, maybe find a few like-minded people. I can't give good advice about to how to get really technically good (I still can’t draw bgs, or very varied features, etc. Other people have said a million better things about it: do studies, etc. etc.) but like, being into something will essentially force you to search up references and get good at drawing various things. I used to be one of those people who drew characters with hands behind their back because I couldn't draw them. Then I became determined to draw them - looked at my own hands, practiced, looked at how other people drew hands. Now they're like my favourite thing to draw! I used to only draw individual characters facing 3/4 left lol - now I draw couples, etc. from different angles (or at least, I try to) because I wanted to draw my own ocs interacting, or characters I liked interacting. I got into various pieces of live action media, which forced me to try to translate real people features into my own style so the characters would be at least slightly recognizable.

There’s that one tweet that’s like “the best way to get better at drawing is to become some kind of pervert” <- so true.

I don’t know how useful this answer will be and sorry if it’s preachy! Reiterating: just like, find something you like. Draw it. Keep finding things you like and which inspire you, and draw those too. Definitely look at other art (different forms too! you’ll notice different things you like from paintings, or movies, or digital vs traditional, or comics) and learn and be inspired. Even when you’re not actively drawing, you can be improving just by observing things. (And remember that sometimes improvement won’t be immediately evident - maybe it’s just that it’s a bit easier for you to draw something; maybe you’ve gotten faster at something; the angle of the jaws you draw is just slightly more realistic; the colours you choose are more interesting. Also note that since you’ll be seeing your own art all the time you won’t really notice even the bigger differences unless you’re looking at the most recent art vs. art from like months ago.) The other thing, which I am super guilty of not doing, is think while you draw. I’m really bad about this and then look back at something and am like damn why’d I do that (for example, I’m really bad about remembering that the thing I’m drawing is 3D, and thinking about how things act in 3D while I draw). So then the next advice is look at your own art a bit after you make it and notice the things you like and what you’d do differently for your next piece. Learn from your own art. Try your best!!! Not everything you draw will be good. Sometimes you’ll try to draw and everything will suck - whatever! like, truly, no skin off your back. try again tomorrow

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go-see-a-starwar · 1 year

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I posted 840 times in 2022

That's 840 more posts than 2021!

67 posts created (8%)

773 posts reblogged (92%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@gffa

@that-gay-jedi

@hayden-christensen

@coldwaughtered

@himboskywalker

I tagged 840 of my posts in 2022

#hayden christensen - 435 posts

#anakin skywalker - 422 posts

#obi wan kenobi - 230 posts

#fanart - 166 posts

#rots - 159 posts

#ewan mcgregor - 143 posts

#kenobi series - 134 posts

#aotc - 75 posts

#fave - 67 posts

#padme amidala - 63 posts

Longest Tag: 139 characters

#his gently downward sloped eyes and close-lipped smile i need to be muzzled and packed neatly into a barrel then launched off niagara falls

My Top Posts in 2022:

#5

How it started:

How it’s going:

1,339 notes - Posted October 29, 2022

#4

Before meeting her again on Coruscant, Anakin finds a sketch he made of Padme

From Anakin: Apprentice [by Marc Cerasini and illustrated by Tommy Lee Edwards]

1,563 notes - Posted August 31, 2022

#3

I don’t know if it can be properly conveyed how much shit was thrown Hayden’s way when his prequel movies came out. Just a metric fuckton of crap. After AOTC (and only in his very early 20s) he was swiftly made the Star Wars pariah, and ROTS did little to assuage that. A lot of the dissatisfaction with the prequels somehow fell on him, both his turns as Anakin got Razzie “Awards”, his name became synonymous with bad, wooden acting.

Over the years the opinion of his performance shifted to Hayden being an unfortunate victim of George Lucas' writing and directing, saddled with lines no actor could make work. But even that opinion still largely discounted Hayden's acting ability.

For him to come back after 17 years to the role he got so much flack for, have his big scene show not even half of his face (and have that face caked in makeup and prosthetic), have his voice distorted, and still deliver the way he did? Still convey all the rage and evil and arrogance but also pain and sadness within Vader? Show everyone this is why he landed the role two decades ago, because he can be frightening and vulnerable and devastating even with just one eye and the corner of his mouth visible? Show everyone he is Anakin/Vader, and make everyone consider he was good all along? Incredible, amazing, the chosen one indeed. Thanks Deborah Chow and Ewan for making this show, thank you Hayden for coming back.

3,416 notes - Posted June 22, 2022

#2

My dudes what exactly do you think is being acknowledged in these scenes?

See the full post

3,560 notes - Posted September 22, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

Finding out they gave Hayden full luxurious ROTS Anakin hair and then proceeded to not show a single frame of it in Kenobi.

See the full post

5,026 notes - Posted August 22, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

#tumblr2022 #year in review #my 2022 tumblr year in review #long post #that tag wasn’t even mine it was a prev tag #thanks for indulging me and my hayden hyperfixation #I’m probably gonna be worse next year XD #hayden christensen #anakin skywalker #2022

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flappingduster · 2 years

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flirtynein and/or get that robo dick

aaah flirty Nein, my beloved this is inspired by @wtgw-fic‘s mushroom fic, which she talked about over here

It made me laugh way too much and I started that fanart months ago when the snippets for it were written

as for the robo dick, that’s the ‘Essek falls in love with an automaton down the line’ fic that I’ve not touched in a whole while, but it’s set maybe a few hundred years after canon Aifl folks provided the name Bob which made me snort hard enough that I went with it lmao

have some snippets from two unrelated scenes

“Fascinated by the technology and having access to an Aeormaton that was privy to information of how to build us, Ka'lith Mirimm had started to acquire components to build automatons for all sorts of purposes. By the time I was made, they had been building them for 13 decades. I am, through outstanding sourced materials, far more advanced than my predecessors."

Essek snorted and turned around to face Bob just to lift an eyebrow and look at them. "Well now we're just bragging, aren't we, my friend." A gentle laugh erupted from their body and once pleased, Essek leaned back into his previous space. "Continue," he prompted before Bob obliged with a hint of delight. "Yes. Now, this of course was quite an exposition to provide context. The rest I can show you from my cache of memory." (...) "I am your companion, you need not be shy in your desire." Essek's breath caught as he heard them say those words, feeling a flush rise to his face at being so directly called out. Still he could only feel his desire for the automaton grow. Bit by bit, as they let their hands move on him, he gave in and closed his eyes, guiding one of the mechanical hands to the closure of his robes. "You are terribly accommodating, my friend. I do not wish to take advantage of anything you're not offering freely. If you want this, want me, you can go ahead." He could hear gentle noises from his companion as he moved, their hand then skillfully and easily opening up his robes despite the finicky small buttons. Essek's breath hitched once the warm fingers touched his skin directly. So different from human hands he was once so familiar with feeling, yet just as warm and pleasant in their gentle pressure.

#dusty answers #my scribbles #that flirty nein wip has one of my cuter art styles that I didn't know I had

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pankomako · 2 years

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Five years ago today, i joined the failboat discord server. i consider that the day i essentially joined the community. things have become increasingly more hellish ever since that day but damn if i don't still enjoy it!

honestly i never expected i'd end up playing such a prominent role in the community (i'm a mod on the streams, was an admin on the server before the situation with my parents happened, plus i think im a pretty known, prominent artist in the community (i made a lot of the discord server's emotes plus i've made a lot of fanart in general) (also can't forget that i've been in the top 3 of what's technically the most messages sent in the server for quite a while, at least i was before the Thing i already mentioned, idk where im at now)), nor did i anticipate i'd make a lot of friends, but i did, and honestly i couldnt tell ya how. ever since middle school i've pretty much been growing up with this community. it's pretty cool.

i feel kinda bad that i can't actually hop on discord to celebrate this time. but regardless, it's a little hard to believe that it's been a full half decade since then. and i think i'll try shooting for at least a full decade. the community's made my life a lot of fun, despite all the tribulations i've been facing behind the scenes. and im looking to keep having fun.

sorry this got so long. but i'm hoping i can get back to the community in full soon, we'll just have to see how it all plays out in the next month or so. happy 5 years of boat community hell to me, i forgot how i wanted to close this out. so here's hoping for more, i guess. i gotta get back to writing this essay now.

#when you put it into perspective that's almost a third of my life #also about half the length of the channel's existence which is kinda wild??#sorry to all my followers who have no clue what im talking about

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woonietune · 2 months

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Chapt Thirtyfive of Waiting for the Past isn't a chapter: it's fanart and self-reprobation and gossip and apologetics and an attempt to manifest world peace, cookies, or fix Writer's Block. Also, fandom drama isn't a MENA crisis

Chapter 35 of Waiting: A Fragile Covenant: Have Some Early Art

LINK HERE TO THE CHAPTER THAT IS NOT A REAL CHAPTER (be warned: it’s a 9500 word author’s apology about a fanfic on hiatus… Did I EVER say I wasn’t crazy?)

Coming maybe to a future near you: another drabble about Woon and the quantum fields of consciousness

Excerpt:

The first drawing is of Saet-byeol by my beautiful friend Peggy (have we known one another for almost 2 decades now?)

The second is a stunning drawing of Hye-won, in old shaman form and in young god of destiny form by the amazing writer Tepid_T . I KNOW! For the longest time, I didn’t know she was such a good artist either! I was really touched when she drew this for me. It was drawn over a year ago.

And third, by my lovely iuiushi , a sketch of Dong-soo and Woon as chibis in drag!

10) WBDS fic recs

The above sketch was for a fic I never ended up writing, but you know who DID write a magnificent, funny, touching, and wonderfully adventurous fic with our boys in drag? Milliecake! It’s All the Queen’s Men and one of the joys of my fandom life.

It’s actually Part 2 of Some Like it Joseon

There’s another fandom fic I’d like to rec by a writer who recently appeared on the scene. Canon compliant, sad, but oh so well-written. Hits all the beautiful chords: The Moon is Crying by YumixYagi4ever

And if you missed the last short fanfic by Memory, you missed a masterpiece. It hasn’t received enough love. A story about Mi-so feeling misunderstood. She’s so ignored in canon, as are all the women characters. Of Course You Wouldn’t Know unravels delicately, bringing past, present, and future into a satisfying resolution for Mi-so and all lovers of good stories (this fic is one of my absolute faves in this fandom). The characterization of Auntie Jang-mi goes beyond her being the usual comedic foil who feeds everyone. Woon, who doesn’t speak much, is an accomplishment of characterization by just being there, and the ghosts of canon don’t hurt so much here; this story made me smile at the end. Read it.

This has been long enough. This is one of those a/n’s that’s going to make someone on R/fanfiction go “wtf” right? Whatever. This is a personal essay. Not exactly Michel de Montaigne but the personal essay is a literary genre–go ahead, report me.

I did some writing, eh?

#excuses excuses #MFA stories #I loved being a fanfiction writer #Dong-soo and Woon are my OTP of all time #mentions of sex and rape, not fictional sex and not fictional rape either, nothing graphic #I want to write again please help #grief is a bitch #did I mention dead babies? Mentioning them now. I think about dead babies all the time; I was obsessing about dead babies long before it was the fashion #I’m a Jewish mama #fic recommendations #some nice WBDS arts #and a prayer #apologies to the seculars out there but I’m the praying type #whenever I try to take the high ground, I find I’m not actually very high

#warror baek dong-soo #fanart #fanfiction #personal essay

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leelee120000 · 4 months

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My Voice: 10 Years of Gravity Falls

June 13, 2022

Gravity Falls premiered June 15, 2012 and ended February 15, 2016. Ten years ago this week. Shocking – I know – 2012 was ten years ago. Gravity Falls was fundamental to my middle school and high school self.

It’s no secret that I love cartoons and that fandom culture is a major part of my life. Gravity Falls directly contributed to my discovery of this. Everything and everyone that came from the show I still keep up with. For context, the show started right before one of the most traumatic events in my entire life. I clung to it like a life preserver in the ocean. Being one of my major sources of joy, Gravity Falls meant everything to 12 year old me and still inspires nearly 22 year old me.

I saw so much of myself in the Pines twins and their world, I was immediately invested. The concept is simple enough, twin kids Dipper and Mable Pines are sent to live in the mysterious small town of Gravity Falls in the middle of nowhere with their Great Uncle Stan for the summer. But it’s so much more. With themes of trust & betrayal, authority & rebellion, and exploring growing up the show never talked down to its audience. If you’ve never watched, and I’m not kidding, do so asap. Even if you don’t enjoy cartoons. It’s two seasons of perfection.

Gravity Falls skirted censorship with an expertise almost unseen in this generation of cartoons. The crew never backed down and the show shined because of it. They would submit episodes with rule breaking scenes, let the censors demand they be changed, and change them to what they actually wanted. Basically making the outlandish appear tame and playing the censors to get what they knew the show needed. This was a kids show that managed to be both hilarious and dramatic in a way most ‘adult’ shows can’t balance. Disney higher ups hated them for it and the crew loved pushing the line. The only real loss the crew had was that Disney’s censors succeeded in forcing the removal of everything LGBTQ+ from the show. However, the crew was good at sneaking it in anyways. (Side characters in implied relationships, quick double meaning lines, etc.) That the fandom immediately picked up on.

Being in the fandom was and is spectacular. The lifelong friends I made from a pocket of nerds on the internet obsessed with a Disney cartoon still amazes me. The creativity unmatched: fanfics, fanart, AUs, voiced projects, cosplays, etc. – all still, actively, being created a decade later shows the passion of the fans. This world starches such a particular itch that’s hard to find in most media. As a writer myself, I mean it when I say I can’t sing the praises of the intricacies of Gravity Falls enough. This show had actual hidden codes and an entire secret puzzle with an ARG that was solved by a global team of fans. What other show on television can say the same? This show is a mystery anyone can enjoy diving in.

LeAnne McPherson

#my writing #gf #gravity falls

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