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dayurno · 5 months

Note

recently reread ur de-aged kevin fic and in the end notes you said you were thinking of doing a sequel w neilandrew being de-aged and just wanted to throw my hat in the ring to say yes pls! you genuinely have such incredible writing and characterization and would LOVE to see your take on it!

wawawa i plan to write it!!!!! i did start a little bit after finishing de-aged kevin and had to scrap it off because i didn't like it, so it might take a little longer. nonetheless i feel like i have no reason not to share it so i'll attach under the cut the scrapped version of kevin with de-aged andreil for your enjoyment :=) if its a little wonky i ask that you bear with me theres a reason why i didnt keep this version

There is a little garden behind Fox Tower where you could fit a dead body without any real effort.

Not that Kevin would know, of course. But he is sure that he has never seen anyone besides himself tend to the ground there — perhaps once in the past there was another athlete who enjoyed gardening, but such a character has not been around for at least a few years. It took Kevin almost an entire week to entirely weed out the square of dirt between Fox Tower’s backdoors and the fence where Palmetto State University property ends and Fox Perimeter starts.

Despite the loneliness of it, the ground is quite fertile; as patches of earth left alone by humankind often are. No one ever comes with Kevin when he gardens — Andrew finding it too soft a hobby and Neil, too pointless —, so there is no worry about someone else intervening with his flowers. Worlds apart from Evermore, Kevin quite enjoys the alone time tending to this garden provides, so he makes a habit out of it.

He’s not sure how well he is doing. His first attempt had been to plant daylilies, because the name had amused him and they were considered beginner plants, offending as the thought is. Daylilies, Kevin’s come to find, are low-maintenance, highly resistant and pest-free — three things Kevin cannot relate to, despite them sharing a surname. Those turned out fine, but one cannot go wrong with daylilies; they’re too easy. The only way Kevin could’ve killed them is if he was an absolute moron.

His second attempt — and the one he is currently keeping a close watch on — were tulips. They’re harder to care for than their predecessors, and take up more of Kevin’s time than he had previously imagined, though he doesn’t fault them for it. He’d gotten seeds from a shop a few blocks down to where Andrew usually buys his cigarettes in Columbia, and hadn’t bothered to ask for more information; Kevin’s first mistake, he realizes.

His tulips have… multiplied. Perhaps too much — hopeless, Kevin sits amidst the rows and rows of golden ladies, dainty-looking but quite surely outnumbering him, and wonders how many more of them could cause a natural imbalance in the area. For how they spread over the garden, Kevin is not sure he wants the answer. Their yellow bulbs seem to mock him.

Deciding this is now above him, Kevin wipes the dirt from his knees and springs up. He breaks the stem of a few tulips that have already bloomed, mindful that they must reserve their energy for a future reblooming, and checks for rotten bulbs before leaving. Surely, with time, his little garden will recover well enough so that it is not fully covered in tulips. Surely he’ll be able to plant something else, then.

If anything, Kevin is at least happy they don’t have thorns. Gathering the handful of flowers he’d cut off, he returns to his dorm, mindlessly wondering to himself if they have a vase wide enough to fit all of these tulips. When their whiny door pushes open under his weight, Kevin announces his arrival by calling out, “Do we still have that big vase from last year?”

No reply. Frowning, Kevin settles his flowers on the kitchen counter and glances over to where Andrew’s wallet and keys sit at their coffee table, even his half-finished pack of cigarettes left untouched. It is highly unlikely for Andrew to leave without at least one of those three items, creature of habit he is. How weird.

Grabbing for his phone, Kevin sees a flash of motion from the corner of his eye, and is just quick enough to sidestep a little body hiding behind the back of their sofa. The idea of something as small as this just hanging around their dorm is so baffling Kevin can hardly compute it, communication between his eyes and his brain coming to a screeching stop as he takes in the sight in front of him.

There’s a child. There’s a — there’s a child.

He is quite small. His hair, a gentle wheat-like thing, curls softly over his forehead, leading down to big, round brown eyes and a thin mouth. The child’s face is very tender, his cheeks flushed from exertion, but he does not meet Kevin’s stare with any such feeling — instead, his eyes widen slightly, and he stumbles back like he’s been hit.

For a moment, Kevin even worries he hasn’t sidestepped as well as he thought and indeed had hit this child on accident. Taking a few steps back himself, Kevin asks, “Who are you?”

It seems like the kind of question the child should ask him, instead of the opposite. The little boy tilts his head back to look at Kevin — and he does have to tilt it very far —, before steeling himself to answer, “I’m—I think I live here now?”

“That…” Kevin hesitates, “can’t be right.” The child’s eyes water slightly. Growing more and more panicked by the minute, Kevin immediately retracts it. “But I’m sure it is, if you’re saying it.”

The tears don’t fall, but they don’t quite recede either; the little boy's face is so fair it starts to look splotchy soon enough, red dusting his nose and cheeks. “Are you my new brother?” He asks, with all the certainty of someone who’s had many new brothers before. A nagging chill runs up Kevin’s spine.

“I don’t believe I am, since I don’t have any siblings,” Kevin limits himself to replying. He crouches down to meet the child’s stare, eyeing his tulips from above his head. Kevin really needs to get that vase soon; it’s not good for them to be out in the open like this. “Can you tell me your name? Why are you here? Where are your parents?”

The little boy eyes him suspiciously. He answers none of Kevin’s questions, but he informs, “There was another little boy too.”

“Right. Well,” Kevin stumbles a bit, unsure of what to say — and what to believe in, even. Children often see things that aren’t there for adults; he does not want to see any manner of spirit today. Or any other day. “Can you go get him for me? Then I can help you figure out what you’re doing here.”

“What else… can I be doing here?” The child asks, frowning lightly. “This is a new home. They—at the last one, they didn’t want me. And I have to be somewhere.”

Recognition shivers through Kevin. “I see,” he replies past the lump in his throat. “I think I might understand. The—the little boy that you mentioned, did he have blue eyes? And, and red hair?”

Andrew crinkles his little nose. “Was orange, not red.”

Oh. Oh, no. Oh, no, no, no. “I understand it now.” Kevin’s thighs tremble too much for him to hold his crouch, so he sits back on his heels, kneeling at Andrew’s height. “How old are you? If you don’t mind.”

Andrew blinks at him for a moment too long before showing Kevin his spread palm — it is unbearably small, chubby, and quite pale, too. “I’m five,” he says.

And he is. He is five years old. He is very five years old by the looks of it, which is not the age Andrew Minyard should be, because before Kevin left for his garden, he was pretty sure the Andrew he left behind was twenty-one.

“You’re five. Okay. That makes sense. Of course,” Kevin babbles, having gone half-stupid from shock. That this could be happening to him — that it could be happening to them again, after Kevin had spent a week of last month being six years old and with no recollection of it. What kind of rotten cosmic joke is this? “I see. Okay, well, let me just—” He rubs a hand across his face. “Hello, I’m Kevin. I am a collegiate athlete. That means I play Exy for a university. Have you heard of it?”

“Exy is on the TV all the time,” Andrew counters, but it seems to be all that he knows. He looks a little hesitant before he nods; tight and anxious. “Hi. I’m Andrew Doe.”

Without a surname makes one a John Doe. Kevin’s heart squeezes. “Hello, Andrew,” he greets, trying to work his face into something gentler. “I understand what you mean now. You called it a new home, correct? It’s not like that. I think what happened here is…”

“Do you work for my father?” A small voice cuts Kevin’s sentence short. He whips his head around to meet a boy a good few inches taller than Andrew leaning against the doorway of their bedroom, his hair a light ginger. When Kevin’s eyes meet his, Neil — Nathaniel? — hunches in on himself in self-reproach, placing little hands in front of his head. “Sorry. I spoke out of turn.”

Kevin blinks. “No,” he answers, softening his voice. This is—this is not the time to doubt whether gentleness is achievable or not; this is the time to force it until it breaks, or until it gives. “I don’t work for your father. I’ve never even met him before.”

Neil pales. Perhaps the idea that someone does not know his father seems outlandish when Neil has been raised under his dominion — Kevin is sure it feels that way, for Neil to look so stricken. Often when you are this small and your parents are the overlords of your world, it feels strange to learn that they are not the end-all-be-all of everyone else’s.

Like a little tour guide, Andrew steps forward to explain, “I think you might be here because your mom and dad went away and children have to live somewhere.”

…Of course, being five years old, his understanding of the situation is about as good as Kevin had expected. Andrew’s explanation of the foster system is fairly good, all things considered, but too realistic for a child his age. He should, at least, still believe that they mean to find him a family instead of sending him from home to home because there is nowhere else for him to be.

Neil pales even further. “Is that true?”

“Is true. Is what happened to me.”

“Alright, alright,” Kevin intervenes at last, and two pairs of eyes turn to him; both hesitant in their own way. He coughs into his fist, deciding that honesty is the easiest route. “To be frank with both of you, I’m not sure why you’re here, either. But… thank you, Andrew, for trying to explain it.”

The little Andrew’s face does something unguarded and surprised before he looks away, blushing lightly.

Kevin keeps his eyes trained to his tulips. “I don’t know what happened for you to get here, but you’re welcome to stay until we can figure this out.”

He is eyed with suspicion from both sides. “I,” Neil shakily starts, the beginning of a meltdown creeping into his voice, “I want my mama. Where is she?”

“I’m sorry,” Kevin replies, and finds that he means it, “I don’t know. If I knew, I’d take you to her.”

He would do no such thing, but it is important to say it, anyway.

Springing upwards before Neil can bring out the waterworks, Kevin takes a few steps next to where he’d put aside his tulips and returns with one in each hand. “Here,” he says, kneeling to their height again. “Want a flower? I just got them from the garden.”

Andrew’s hand reaches for it, but does not bridge the distance, hesitant. Neil doesn’t even try to get it. “Flowers are for girls,” he tells Kevin.

“Hm. Do I look like a girl to you?”

“Yes.”

Kevin supposes that was a mistake on his part. It’s always the hair with children. “Well, I’m not,” he argues — argues! — with five-year-old Neil. “It’s very rude to not accept a gift.”

Neil eyes him, squinting quietly. He takes a few steps closer, looking more relaxed now that he’s figured Kevin is not working for his father. Coaxingly, Kevin offers one of the tulips in his direction — the bigger one, standing proud and yellow and delicate. It took a great effort for them to look this healthy. “These are called golden ladies. They’re perennials — that means they grow no matter the season. I plant them myself.”

A little hand curls around the stem of the smallest of Kevin’s tulips, catching it with all the clumsy delicacy of children who have yet to learn a finer touch. Letting Andrew take it, Kevin's mouth twitches. “Don’t worry about thorns, there’s none.”

He doesn’t mention the eco-system smasher Kevin had accidentally become in the process. Hopefully, no one notices the terrifying increase of tulips in Palmetto for the upcoming springs.

Andrew doesn’t answer him, eyes trained to the tulip. The yellow of the inner petals matches the pale of his hair; makes him look more flower than child. Sweet, sweet boy.

Kevin turns back to Neil. “Won’t you take it even if you don’t like them? I don’t have a vase yet. I’m afraid they’ll just rot if you don’t take them.” This is a lie — but it’s a fair one. Children shouldn’t be so restrained.

The idea of imminent destruction seems to convince Neil to walk the distance between himself and Kevin to take the flower in his little hand. He says nothing. Kevin can’t tell if he likes it at all — he’s so put-upon.

A little hand flutters in the general direction of Kevin’s head. “Why is your hair…” Andrew asks.

“What? Long?” The child nods. “What’s wrong about it?”

“It shouldn’t be like this.”

Well, that’s rude. Kevin huffs softly under his breath, absent-mindedly combing his fingers through his hair. “When I was a little over your age, I had a friend — a brother — who liked my hair like this. I think I just grew used to it.”

It’s not the full story, of course. He can’t tell them about Riko, and how much of his preferences Kevin had taken as law out of admiration, at first, then fear, later on. He can’t explain, either, that his hair staying this way is his own way of mourning — a childhood left unfinished, a little boy abused into the insanity of Riko’s final years, brotherhood yet to be tainted by blood and jealousy. Children this young can’t tell Kevin carries all the marks of the grieving.

“Oh,” Andrew replies. He looks like he wants to ask some more, but he doesn’t.

“I can teach you how to braid it later, if you want,” Kevin offers. He has not even a sliver of a clue about what children should do in their free time. In his time, his mother took him all around the world during her trips, which didn’t usually leave Kevin much time for playing; then, after she died, Exy consumed most of his time between little league and Tetsuji’s endurance bootcamp. “It’s a useful skill. You can impress your future wife with it.”

He knows well enough that Andrew is never, ever going to get a wife; still, Kevin knows no other way to frame the importance — or, rather, mask the lack thereof — of this to him.

Andrew nods politely. He, for one, is taking this much better than Neil seems to be — for good reason, Kevin imagines. Already registered in the foster system, Andrew must be used to adapting to new homes, new siblings, new adults with an eccentric knack for gardening and haircare. He’s indulging Kevin. A five-year-old!

“Well,” Kevin clears his throat, suddenly a little embarrassed. “Are you hungry? It should be almost lunchtime.”

No answer. It’s almost like dealing with the adults Andrew and Neil again.

Lunch is bland and unimaginative; Kevin follows the recipe obsessively, unwilling to make children choke down trash. It’s one thing for their adult selves to indulge Kevin in his lack of culinary talent, but children don’t yet have the taste buds for experimental food, nor the desire to put up with their caretakers’ inability to cook. More than once he resists the urge to add more spice — or even more salt.

While he cooks, Kevin allows Andrew and Neil to get acquainted with each other. They talk quietly, eyeing the other with no less suspicion they eyed Kevin with, and seem happy to do their own thing. Skittish, for sure: but can they be blamed for it? Kevin doesn’t expect them to hit it off immediately, especially with Neil’s under-socialization. In the week or so Kevin should have them, it is likely they’ll progress on that front.

Polite like a trained dog, Andrew waits by the kitchen doorway to help Kevin with setting the table. He’s far too small for such a task — he’ll drop any glassware Kevin gives him. Still, unwilling to let the child feel useless, Kevin asks him to set some napkins and cutlery out. Yes, that should be enough.

“Thank you, Andrew,” he says when he is done finishing up on their plates. Looking at the portions, Kevin is inclined to think they are far too much for someone of their size, but he doubts either have had access to an unrestricted meal in quite a while. At their age, Kevin knows he hadn’t. “It is very kind of you to help with the table.”

Andrew tilts his head towards his food without comment. He is almost unnervingly polite. It’s not the Andrew Kevin knows, and the contrast feels scathing.

Despite the children’s best efforts, their meal is not quiet. Kevin is not good with children, but he likes to think he is good with Andrew and Neil — as good as one can be, anyway. He prompts them into conversation by asking questions about their interests, their lives, their routines; half of it is trying to figure out how to care for these two, and the other half is emulating a chewed-out memory of how Kayleigh used to talk to him.

She was never the kind of parent who baby-talked to Kevin. As soon as he was able to, she tried to engage him in conversation — however loose that concept can be for a five-year-old. Kayleigh, from what he remembers of her, had the ability to make anyone feel listened to; Kevin doesn’t remember ever doubting she cared for his childish babbling about toys and daycare, even if nostalgia had colored the memory a soft mouth-pink. He only wishes he would’ve gotten at least half of her social adeptness. From Kayleigh, all Kevin got was green eyes, a gaping hunger for success and an inescapable attraction to troubled men.

“I play Exy and I like books,” Kevin offers in trade for information. It’s — well, he doesn’t have many hobbies. The gardening and the cooking are a late product of much of Dr. Betsy Dobson’s insistence that Kevin must make something out of himself that isn’t Exy-related. “I like cooking but I’m not good at it. And I like gardening but it takes a lot of work so I don’t do it all the time.”

“It’s not that bad,” Andrew tells him, motioning to his food with small movements. He finished his plate in record time, inhaling Kevin’s poor attempt at a caesar salad like it’s a five stars meal. On the other hand, Neil is halfway through with his and looks done already. “Your food.”

“Not that bad?” Kevin tilts his head slightly, amused. He’ll take it, he supposes. “Thank you, Andrew.”

Hesitant, like perhaps he fears Kevin will be angry at him for it, Neil picks up the conversation where he left off to say, “I like… horses. But, um, like toys.”

“Horses, I see,” Kevin repeats, a bit hopeless. Children’s interests are so loose. “And what else?”

Neil flicks him a suspicious glare. “What else?”

“I gave you four of my interests. A conversation has to be equal.”

Looking as if Kevin had sprouted a second head right in front of him, Neil does not do as he is asked so much as he stares at Kevin, mouth open in a little o. Has no one asked this child what he likes before? It feels out of character for the Butcher of Baltimore, sure, but Neil’s mother had seemed to care for him, at least from what little Kevin had heard about her.

“No?” Kevin tries after a few moments of silence. “I’m just trying to be friends.”

“Why would you be my friend?” Neil asks, putting down his fork with surprising care; as if to ensure it makes no noise. Even his voice is small and unobtrusive, despite the words. “Adults and children aren’t friends. Adults want children to be quiet.”

Kevin hides a wince. He hadn’t imagined the Butcher of Baltimore, in all his serial killer glory, would have indulged his child in conversation — and by the way Neil acts, he could’ve guessed for himself that most of Neil’s childhood had been trying to stay out of his father’s way. But no one ever wants to assume the worst out of a loved one’s suffering; Kevin had held out hope there’d be at least a silver lining in Neil’s horror stories.

It is not unlike how Kevin and Riko were raised in the Nest, anyway. Their private tutors were stern, and despite much of their trying, there was no place for childhood in Evermore: they were told to keep quiet or else. The Master would often say that they were not to act like children — it hadn’t occurred to him up until now how cruel it is to forbid a child from being childish.

“Well, if I’m asking you, don’t you think I want to know?” Kevin argues. “Not all adults think the same thing. Do you think the same thing as every other child?”

A pause. Neil shakes his head, looking somewhat green, as if he had just realized what he said. From Kevin’s other side, Andrew stares anxiously.

Rubbing a hand through his face, Kevin slowly puts out, trying to enunciate his words as gentle as he can make them, “I am not angry that you spoke your mind. It makes sense, what you said.” He shakes his head a little. Only a few minutes in, and he’s already ruining it — Kevin’s no good for anything that doesn’t involve a racquet. “But I would not have asked if I didn’t want to know. Do you understand?”

A small, careful nod. Kevin will take whatever he can get.

“Good.” Kevin starts to gather the empty plates — his and Andrew’s —, and motions towards Neil’s half-finished one. “Do you not like it? I can make you something else, if you want.”

The sudden shift in conversation visibly vexes Neil, but, politely, he replies, “...Not hungry.”

From beside Kevin, Andrew flinches. Hurrying to dispel it, Kevin says, “It’ll be in the fridge in case you want it later.” Piling the plates into one of his hands, Kevin offers the other one to Andrew. “Come on, you didn’t get to tell me what you like during lunch.”

The child watches Kevin’s hand — the right one, smooth and unscarred if a little crooked from the years of gripping racquets — warily before accepting it, threading his little fingers through Kevin’s. His hand feels unimaginably small; so fragile it is a wonder it even exists. Kevin is reminded of the first time he saw a baby bird, back in Dublin: he’d told his mom he couldn’t tell if it was super ugly or super cute. She’d laughed for what felt like an eternity after.

Still sitting politely at the table, Neil watches their joined hands, frowning. Kevin can’t tell what he’s thinking — wouldn’t be able to even with an adult Neil —, but the face he makes claws at his heart. “N—” not his name, “ah, do you want to come with?”

Thus invited, Neil follows them into the kitchen. Kevin washes the dishes and listens as Andrew tells him, a little shyly, that he likes Sesame Street, street cats (“Really?” Kevin asks. “Aren’t their claws a little scary?” to which Andrew seems to lose some respect for him on the spot), chocolate and amusement parks, when he is allowed to go. It's a fairly common list — Kevin didn’t know what he expected a five-year-old version of Andrew to like. Something a little more unorthodox, perhaps.

But children are the same everywhere, at any point. Andrew soaks up the attention Kevin gives him, happy to answer all questions, if a little insecure on why Kevin would be asking them. Knowing where Andrew was at this age, he doesn’t doubt it’s been a while an adult has actually spoken to him with some level of care for what he has to say: when was the last time Andrew has actually felt companionship? Someone who hears what he says and asks questions about it?

It feels sacrilegious to stop now. Already out of dishes to clean, Kevin scrubs and re-scrubs their plates until his hands ache as he asks Andrew questions, not unaware of Neil’s watching eyes.

“And how is it? California?” Kevin asks. The next thing he says is a bold-faced lie, because he’s visited Jean before, but he still says it. “I’ve never been. I heard it’s beautiful.”

He’s heard no such thing. Jean seems to think California is where meaningful art goes to die, but he can’t tell Andrew that.

“Is okay,” Andrew tells him, propped up on a stool next to Kevin. His little legs swing mindlessly. “The traffic — there’s traffic. And Disneyland.”

“You’ve been?” He asks again.

“Oh, um, no.”

It’s expected. “I have not either,” Kevin relates, making it sound like a bigger woe than it really is. His hands are rubbed raw at this point, and the soap pricks at the skin of his palms — soon, he’ll have to stop. Just a little more. “I don’t think I’d like it, either way.”

Andrew watches him curiously. “Why?”

“I don’t like crowds.” It’s not as easy as that, but Kevin leaves it as it is. The prickling sensation of the soap starts to crawl up his wrist, and he decides it is time to stop. Drying his hands off on a nearby cloth, Kevin prompts, “How about some dessert?”

It is the first time he’s ever said those words, and they horrify him, but the quickly-hidden flash of interest in Andrew’s face is worth breaking his streak for. From the stool beside Andrew, Neil frowns lightly. This child is too serious — Kevin tries to remember if he was like this back in little league, but his memory is not the best after so many hits to the head.

He rummages through their freezer. Andrew’s adult self is fond of indulging — there are a few half-eaten ice cream cartons tucked beneath frozen peas and other such vegetables, though most of them are flavored a cherry liqueur Kevin will most certainly not feed to children. Scavenging further he is able to retain a sealed chocolate carton, the frost covering it making his fingertips tingle.

This has to be too frozen to eat. Helpless, Kevin turns to look at the two five-year-olds as if they have a better idea. It’s weird, now, to be the person Andrew and Neil look to for answers — Kevin is used to it being the other way around. He is caught thinking that he’ll probably struggle in the coming days, without his two little shadows making life easier for him.

“I think if I microwave it a little bit, nothing’s going to happen,” Kevin mumbles to himself, aware that he is not inspiring much respect as an authority figure. He’s no Andrew, after all: Kevin’s still himself, despite all his best efforts to be someone else.

The ice cream loses some of its original texture in the microwave, but, if anything, Andrew seems to enjoy it as Kevin passes him a bowl. Neil does not accept one himself, politely saying he doesn't like sweets, and the lack of attitude from him is disturbing. Kevin is used to Neil being a force of nature — seeing him this quiet, this contained, is not easy. It makes him think of the iron-shaped scar on his adult self’s chest. All that dead skin.

Unwilling to let him be left out, Kevin cuts some slices of apple for him, which Neil takes with some degree of gratefulness. The little boys settle in front of the TV while Kevin manages to find a children’s channel, looking small on their ratty dorm carpet. Kevin isn’t sure children should be this small in the first place — he’s not sure if they are little because of genetics, or neglect. How much can you hurt a child until they disappear?

Kevin sits himself with them, cross-legged. He is too old to see the appeal of children’s television, so most of it is watching them from the corner of his eye and finding out what to say to Aaron to get him to come and help.

You 14:36

Hello. I think whatever happened to me last month just happened to Andrew and Neil.

As in, they have turned into five-year-olds. If you’ve forgotten.

When there is no immediate response, Kevin huffs to himself and snatches a picture of their two little heads pending towards each other, deep in conversation about the show they are watching. Kevin is, at least, relieved to see them interacting at all: Andrew might have been to kindergarten already, but Neil has always been undersocialized, all tutors and nannies. If Kevin can’t be his friend, then at least Andrew can.

The picture gets him a quicker answer.

Aaron 14:45

what the fuck what the fuck what the ufck

why doe sthis keep fucking happening to you

Like it’s his fault!

You 14:45

This is not the kind of thing I can control.

They are good children. Polite. Easier to deal with than I was, I wager. But I need you to come and help.

Aaron 14:47

why should i

what makes you think i could help you

You 14:49

Because he is your brother.

Before Kevin can read Aaron’s answer, something hooks on his hair. Looking down, he finds Andrew’s hand hanging a few inches away from it, alarmed and wide-eyed at being caught. Behind him, Neil looks just as queasy, as if this had been their joint effort.

“Can I help you?” Kevin asks, raising his eyebrow a little. When he gets no response, he concedes, "You can touch. Don’t tug or pull. And keep it away from your mouth.”

No response. Kevin doubles down, “It’s really fine. Here.” He pulls his hair out of its low ponytail, letting it curtain down his shoulders and back. It’s not often he lets his hair down like this — it can be too much of a hassle. Kevin ought to cut it one day, but the thought still makes him a little sick to think of. “As long as you’re careful.”

An hesitant little hand inches closer and closer, still warily watching out for Kevin’s reaction. When Andrew finds no resistance, he combs little fingers down the length of Kevin’s hair, faint and amazed. He’s not very gentle — children are too clumsy for it, still, and there is some tugging. It doesn’t hurt, though. Kevin allows it.

Resigning himself to being played with, Kevin gives them his back, leaning his elbow against the couch. Another pair of little hands clutches at a chunk of hair, and he knows Andrew has convinced Neil to get in on their impromptu hairdresser salon. At least they’re playing, Kevin consoles himself as he feels a pull on his scalp. At least they’re getting along.

“I have hair ribbons on my desk,” he offers, knowing what he is setting himself up to and still going through with it. “Colorful ones. Satin. Would you like to see them?”

A pause on the tugging. “Really?” That was Neil.

“Yes. But I’ll have to get up to get them.”

“I can do it,” Andrew tells him, the ever-helpful little waiter. He’s so polite — Kevin wonders if they taught him there is a higher chance of getting adopted if you treat the foster parents with subservience. Probably. “Where is it?”

“Andrew, it’s fine—”

“I’ll do it. He’s still playing, so I’ll do it.”

So kind, giving Neil time to play by himself. Kevin, helplessly charmed, would allow him anything. “Okay. Thank you.” Motioning vaguely in the direction of their desks, he says, “It’s the one with the shelves on top of it. Yes, that one, with the books. Be careful not to hit your head!” Watching Andrew narrowly duck under a shelf gives Kevin half an aneurysm, but the child seems no less interested in his quest. “First drawer. There. Did you find it?”

“Yes,” Andrew replies, shoving a chubby fist into the drawer and pulling out a handful of hair ribbons, all different colors and sizes. There was an organization system to it, and his careless pulling has clearly ruined it. A little disheartened, Kevin doesn’t know whether to laugh or cry. “This?”

“Yes. Please keep the drawer closed.”

The drawer snaps shut, and Andrew makes his way back to them, freshly acquired ribbons falling over his fingers and wrist in colorful flops. Kevin doesn’t see him sit back down, but he feels Andrew’s hand on his hair again. “Why do you have shelves?” Neil asks after a few moments of silence, their hands working ribbons in his hair via extremely clumsy braiding. “Um, just you, I mean. The others are empty.”

That he’s asking anything seems like a blessing, when the child is so quiet. “My—” Kevin hesitates. How to even describe it? “My… friend built them for me. The shelves. He got annoyed at me for leaving my books everywhere.”

It’s true. Just as Kevin loathes Andrew’s habit of leaving his cigarettes anywhere, so does Andrew loathe Kevin’s astray book piles across the living room, left half-read or unfinished in his haste to get to class or practice. The shelves had been less of a compromise and more of a surprise: one day, they were simply sitting above his desk like they’ve always been there. Kevin never asked Andrew if he built them, but he figured the wood splinters on his fingers were reason enough. It took a lot of arguing for Andrew to take them out the right way, instead of just letting the splinters break on their own.

“Oh,” Andrew says, entirely unaware of the story being about his older self and focused on tying a bow on Kevin’s hair. “Where is he?”

“There’s two of them, actually. They’re away for work.” Kevin leans his head closer when the tugging starts to get a little painful. “What are you doing back there, anyway?”

“It’s pretty,” Neil murmurs, defending his work. Kevin doubts it is, but he’s happy to even have the little Neil’s attention at all.

“You know how to braid?” He asks, trying to steal a look and getting his head gently moved back by Andrew. “By the way, what’s your name? You haven’t said.”

Neil hesitates, hands freezing. Kevin keeps talking, “Whatever you want to be called.”

“Um,” Neil thinks on it for a moment. He seems to be rolling Kevin’s hair nervously around his fingers now; a nervous fidget. “My—my dad calls me Junior, but my mom calls me Nat—Nathaniel.”

He doesn’t say it like he enjoys being called either.

“Hello, Nathaniel,” Kevin tilts his head in acknowledgement, because he wasn’t raised in a barn. “I’m Kevin. It’s nice to meet you.”

Shy little thing he is, Nathaniel doesn’t answer.

The children play with Kevin’s hair for a few more minutes before losing interest, leaving him a mess of ribbons and tangles he decides not to deal with for now. He imagines they should be put to sleep soon — children this small sleep in the afternoon, do they not? At their age, Kevin is sure he had to be made to nap one way or another, what with his mother’s hectic schedule. It’s a bit of a parenting cop-out, he is aware, but… Kevin could use a nap himself. Sure the children do, too.

He makes a show out of yawning behind his palm. Two pairs of eyes turn to him, neither particularly moved by his display. Tough crowd.

“Maybe we can all take a nap,” Kevin suggests. Nothing.

#asks #kandreil #my writing #thisis very scuffed i did some minor editing but its seriously not good. dont perceive me

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yawnjunn · 2 years

Text

lovesick - hueningkai

summary: with idol kai debuting at a young age (17), he never gets to experience the 'love' life, until he met you not long ago, keeping your relationship a secret from the public and having to sneak out just to only see each other like 2 teens in love

inspired by one of their songs "0x1=lovesong"

AND also bcs i miss blonde kai era

╰┈➤ hueningkai × gn!reader

╰┈➤ pronouns: they/them

╰┈➤ warnings: you and kai having kdrama moments so FLUFF!!!

*apologies if theres any grammar error*

»»————-　　————-««

you are currently waiting at the main lobby of the hybe building, at 11.30pm, waiting for your boyfriend, kai to show up since he asked you to wait for him while he and his members finishes up their last dance practice at late night

but little did you know, as soon as you texted kai that you were already at the lobby, waiting for him, he smiled from ear to ear, clearly getting excited to see his lover

his smile got the attention of his leader, aka soobin

mhm soobin had guessed it...

"kai, you're seriously going to ditch our practice for them? you already hang with them yesterday at 1 am and came back home at 6 resulting you to miss our morning practice, our comeback is around the corner and you better start taking care of your health more" soobin scolded him, pointing at him at every word he said (yasss soobin showing his leader side)

but scolding has become normal for kai these days

does he ever listen to his hyungs? yes

but does he ever follow what his hyungs says? never

kai took ALL his hyungs advices as a joke, this kind of behavior would only get his members annoyed

his mind is only on for this one person, which is you

while soobin was scolding him, kai was smiling like an idiot the entire time as he thought of your beautiful face, even tho he already saw you like yesterday

kai smiling like an idiot got his members wondering if THE hueningkai is crazy enough to be smiling while getting...scolded?

soobin kept on scolding him, telling him how he should be focusing on their comeback first instead of you but kai wasnt listening at all, he was already getting his jacket, ready to leave without soobin noticing

"Im sorry hyung but this is the last time i'll meet them, i promise i'll focus on our comeback after this" kai happily said knowing this is definitely NOT his last time seeing you

"where the hell do you think youre going? we havent finished practicing yet" yeonjun said in a serious tone, crossing his arms together

kai slowly grab the door handle from behind him and dashed out of the door

this caused yeonjun to chase him down the hall

"YAH! HUENINGKAI!" he said breathlessly as he kept on chasing kai, down the stairs, down the escalator etc. with all the staffs watching them thinking they might just be playing

as yeonjun got to the lobby, not only he saw kai running for his damn life.....but he also saw that kai was holding the hand of y/n as they both passed through the exit door, running away together

at this point, he should just give up trying to drag kai back and instead let the two lovers have fun, yeonjun thought

ANYWAYS back to the young couple...

"what was that about?" you gasped for air as you settle down yourself after running hand in hand with your boyfriend

"yeonjun hyung chased me down so that i wouldnt escape practice" kai said clearly out of breath, while chuckling in between

"you escaped practice AGAIN? i couldve wait for you till youre finished"

"you couldve wait, yes. but could i wait? no" kai sassily replied

you were never a sporty person, so you being a lazy mf, you THANKFULLY found a bench that is only 5 steps away from where you stand and sat down, fanning yourself in the most dramatic way

kai chuckled as he watched you being dramatic, "and this is why i never invite you to jog with me"

you gave him a glare, but he only brushed it off before sitting beside you, looking up at the full moon above you guys

"our comeback is really near, i'll be busy for this comeback you know, which means all my schedules are full, which also means no dates for us" he gave you a sad smile before continuing," and to be honest i just want a nice long break" he sigh before closing his eyes with his head still facing up

you turned your head to look at him, admiring his side profile, his clear skin but most importantly his newly dyed blonde hair (HUENINGKAI'S BLONDE ERA WOOOHOO)

you had been OBSESSED with his new hair for this comeback, it made him a whole different person.. well just by appearance, he is still the hueningkai you know tho <33

you scoot a little bit closer to him, linking your arm with his, resting your head on his shoulder, just the way he likes

his heart beats even faster the moment you lay your head on his shoulder, look, he may be your boyfriend but he still gets those butterfly feelings around you yk

kai smoothly laid his head on top of yours, with him still smiling

"lets not talk about your work okay? tonight is just about us" you gently lift your head to face him, now with both your hands in his hands, fingers interwined

he gave you a single nod and a soft smile in return

you knew him talking about his work would make him even more stress, so you stopped him from talking any further

kai was now zoning out, facing the ground, probably thinking about something...thats when you instantly knew he was STILL thinking about his work, his group's comeback, all the scoldings he'd get from all of his members etc.

"kai-ah" you said, squishing his face without hesitation, which made him giggle of how cute your sudden action was

"Im not thinking about work, i promise" now its his turn squishing your face as a payback which made both of you laugh

suddenly a drop of water hit kai's eye signaling that it was about to rain

"Its about to rain soon. kai, we gotta go" you quickly stood up from the bench, pulling your 6'0 boyfriend's arm

but as expected, you? A small person trying to pull this man? pfft no way

"y/n, can we stay for a bit? Its too comfortable here" kai was obviously putting all his weight on the bench, making you struggle even more trying to pull him

"i don't want my hair to get wet, i just showered today so lets gooo" you whined at him but only to receive a smirk from him

the rain is now starting to pour little by little, droplets of rain were now visible in yours and kai's clothes

kai noticed this and quickly unzipped his jacket, as if he was rushing to take it off from his body....you wondered what he was trying to do

just then, he put the jacket hood over your head trying to cover your head since you said you didn't want to get your hair wet (soft huening vibess)

kai held your hand, while your other hand was holding the hood of the jacket so that it wouldnt slip from your head

kai was running along with you, in the rain and trying his best to find a place to drop by as a shelter

...and so you guys ended up entering a convinience store

"never thought running in the rain would be fun" kai smiled at you as he tried drying his hair by ruffling it

"It was fun, i gotta admit...but your hair, its wet!"

"I dont care about my hair, as long as yours is still dry" he sheepishly smile at you

you were in awwww, this man couldnt get any precious 🥺

you uncovered the jacket from your head and put it on kai's head instead, rubbing his hair, trying to dry it with the jacket

"we could've shared the jacket to cover ourselves you know.." you said

"i know but i dont really care about me getting wet anyways BUT now that we're here...can we eat some ramen? my treat i promise" kai grinned at you waiting for your approval

"hmm alright, but tell me if youre short of money, i can help you pay" you offered

but kai shook his head as a response, "there's no need for that"

"mhmm sure"

"sit over there y/n, i'll be right back" he pointed at the long table that is attached to the big glass window near the enterance with a row of perfectly arranged stools

you walked over to the table and sat down on of the stools, patiently waiting for kai while you scroll down through your phone

kai later then came back with 1 iced drink on his left hand and a cup of ramen on his right hand, handing the drink to you first

"i got you some peach iced tea and some ramen" he carefully placed the hot steaming ramen on the table

the thing is....he only bought ONE drink and ONE ramen?...is he not gonna eat or even drink?, you worried

"um...kai, you didn't bought anything for yourself?" you furrowed your eyebrows in confuse

"hm? no no...its not that i dont want to buy one for myself, its just that...i wanted to share with you, you know...like those cliche couples.." he rub the back of his neck and blushed real hard till you can see his pinkish cheeks

you were about to burst into laughter cause of his cuteness, "no wonder you get clingy around your members when im not around"

kai gave you a confused look, "who told you that....was it beomgyu hyung? no?"

"hm?? nothing nothing" you quickly change the subject, changing your focus onto the ramen infront of you

you scoop a mouthful of ramen onto the chopsticks you were using and brought it close to kai's mouth

"say ahhh", you teased him which made him smile at you before opening his mouth to eat the ramen

after few seconds of him chewing, all of sudden, he coughed uncontrollably, which means he mightve swallowed too fast or swallowed a big chunk of food

you quickly take your drink and point the mouth of the straw to his mouth, which he automatically put it in his mouth, drinking your peach iced tea

"you shouldn't swallow too quickly, you'd choke" you sigh wiping his mouth with a napkin

while you were wiping his mouth, he admired you closely without you noticing

he has this stars in his eyes everytime he looks at you

"you took good care of me when i couldn't even took care of myself while preparing for our next comeback...thank you" he gave you a soft smile, a sincere smile

"of course, i'll be here for you always" you gave him a smile before giving him a peck on his lips

»»————-　　————-««

after you both finished your food and drink, you both had bought an umbrella to share cause guess what? It's still raining heavily outside

so here you guys are, walking together, side by side under one umbrella- which kai offered to hold ofc

you linked your arm into his and layed your head on his shoulder while walking down the pavement

"you know..being with you actually made my stress gone" kai proudly said

"really? then i should be with you ALLL the time, even in the bathrooms" you sarcastically said

"thats actually not a bad idea.." he smirked at you

this caused you to hit his shoulder lightly

"but seriously...you're coming to watch our comeback stage, right?"

"yeah yeah i will, you better do your best on that stage, break that damn stage mr.huening"

"break that damn stage? hmm...for you, i will, mr/mrs huening" he winked playfully at you

»»————-　　————-««

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andromedasummer · 2 years

Note

hey uh what's gallipoli i feel fear already

gallipoli is the short term referring to the gallipoli campaign during ww1. it was a plan by the british to send largely australian and new zealand soldiers (like nearly our entire army was sent there) to invade turkey. the plan was to land at gallipoli peninsula, (a beach surrounded by sheer high cliffs), climb the cliffs, take up defense in the village on the cliffs and face the turkish army there.

they never made it up the beach. the plan was leaked months before and when the ships dropped off the soldiers, they found the turkish army had settled themselves at the top of the cliffs and were firing down onto them before they could even get out of the boats. it was an absolute slaughter. thousands and thousands died trying to get onto the beach. when they managed to dig in and set up defenses, a large chunk of the army had already been killed. but the british refused to admit failure or defeat and instead they had the soldiers hold off there for a year and one month. slowly gaining land as they climbed up, dying from illness in the trenches or during turkish shelling. ships would send in more soldiers, who were almost always newly trained and only 17-20. they'd transport the injured to an island called lemnos, where they were treated by ANZAC (Australian and NZ soldiers) nurses. the dead couldnt be buried and many had to be left to rot, some in the trenches with the living soldiers, and the intense heat made it worse. my great great grandfather on my fathers side was the last man to be evacuated from the island when the campaign was deemed a failure. he left by submarine because any other travel was too dangerous, he witnessed hundreds die on that island.

The Gallipoli exhibit is brutal, because Gallipoli was brutal. It has giant lifelike statues depicting the mens lives in the trenches, getting gangrene from wounds or witnessing their friends getting shot, unable to sleep because of the constant firing upon them. Theyre all based on real people as well, who died or survived. One is of a famous New Zealander nurse who, in the middle of a shipment of dying soldiers, received a letter informing her that her brother and father had been killed. there was nothing she could do but accept the information and put the letter back in her pocket and go back to treating the wounded. One particular statue that our casual allowed the 6 year olds to see was of a hyperrealistic man in a hospital bed with a severed arm, dying of blood loss. Everything but the horrors of war are in complete darkness, with the statues all lit up to show glistening sweat and blood and tears in a gruesome display. theres lots of information about individuals and conditions the campaign and a timeline of the events on the walls. You go from giant illuminated statue to statue to statue, all the while speakers throughout are playing gunshots, shouting and people dying.

In short the campaign was a complete failure. Thousands died, including some of my family members and honestly probably family members of most New Zealanders. Those that survived were some of the most traumatized soldiers to return to New Zealand (aside from the few who lived through Monte Casino, which my great grandfather on my mothers side had visceral trauma from). Gallipoli is THE event we remember every ANZAC day, its where we lost most of our soldiers.

kids here do learn about it from ages 6-9, but not like that. Its a teacher gently explaining these concepts, not a 4D exhibition intended to show adults the full horrors of war. I cannot believe the casual worker took the kids in there. genuinely its insane to me how she thought that would end up okay.

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wildlycuriouswanderercj · 2 years

Text

k1 speed

i am now determined to leave america

ever since i moved over to the east bay

life has ended for me

the only lifei have now is overseas

not anywhere local

i no longer have close friends

i am a lone wolf

i enjoy doing things myself

i enjoy spending money on myself

i have been forthing resturants for 4 years

retails for 2

and customer services for about 2 as well

i hae about 8 years of working experiences

i started volunteering for companies at age of 11 or 12 ish

its been 10 years of working service

for most people

they start work at 22

after college

and by 32

theyll have 10 years of working experiences

i am 27 now

i have 10 years or more idk

but life here in k1 went bby quick

started out with many of the boys

now its just down to me basically

everyone moved one

everyones gone

its been a fast fun thing

things went and

came and went

things are moving fast

and so should i

i realize my life here wasnt equalitine to much

i decided i will follow thru with my plans for departure on the 29 of novmebt

i will coe back jan 18 fo family dinner

i will stay

get a job for any 2 or 3 onths

unitil its my bady

when i will head out again

life in k1

started off

well

there were many guys

all were faster than me

had some great lessons

racing with faster people

things picked up

now im one of the fastest

but not fastest

new rookie in town took the spot

but yeah it was fun

had a quick short tie

well spent

covid came

and 2022 flew by

any lessons and scams along the way

didnt make much progess in terms of social or financial standing

didnt make it in tersm of money or girls

but i not worrying

i had a good year

or bad year

a bad year of good lesson

we did alot this year i feel

i liveeld u p a good aount

many experiences along the way

not many too memorable

but times

good ties flies

its time to let go of the ast

pas

and move on to the future where the great journey awaits

no more being fearful of things

no more being lustful for girls

no need of anything but my own harnessed good vibration

i dontneed to seell anybody anything

i dont need to share anything with anyone

its all coming to an end

life is moving on

when i leave

i will go

and when i come back

ill take a job at sushi house

and take back the job at k1

with new attitude

and i will work to make 4-5k a month

that is athe goal

i will work

all the way

thru may

and until summer

june 2023

then i will elave again

this time

i iwll leave with 30k in my account

january 1/2

feb

march

april

may

18k.... thats plenty

i currenly

have 7 plus 3

i have ten k

its been a year...

well 5 motnhs 18k not ad actually

yeah

get 20k

and leave again

from june

july

aaugust

september.

novmeber

deceber

and come ack january

20k

6 months

3k a month spending

work months for 6 months of play

repeat and repeat

life

of a 27 year old

then maybe by then

id have enoguh of everything

if not

and by then

its real time to get started with maybe a house

and car

mortage

puppy

girlfriend

child

and by 40

id like to settle

after

10 years+ of travel eperience

ive done it all

seen it all

lived all there is to do eat and see smell feel

and by 40

ill be good

then ican settle

house car dog girl mortages friends social gatherings

for now

tis all about the travels an

live it up now

who knows

if ill live to 40

theres so much to see

and do while young tthan go get a house

lock urself in

get a girl

get a car

lock urself in

lock get tied down

do the same shit

eat the same shit

see the same people

age 20- 30

30- 40

the prime years of ur life

spent doing the same repatitive shit

running track

doning tracking

doing races on the sae track

its about getting out there

doing all u can do

lvingin all u can live

being all u can be

being great being free and wild and limitless

dont be tied down to what others opinion is best of ru

u know hawts best for u

and do what is best for u

dontelt don

dont elt others

tell u whats bet for u

only u should have dictoriatiship over ur own life

else ur life isnt urs

its someone elses being controls for u

to let u know this is whats best

be the captian fo rur own story

0 notes

hanazuma-inactive · 3 years

Note

Hi! Don't know if you're doing requests now or if this will interest you but... How about a Bokuto x male reader where Bokuto is usually the top when they do it but the one time he bottoms for the reader, he just can't get enough and started to beg to be fucked all the time. Maybe when they're all alone in the locker room

Its okay if you can't haha

songbird, (nsfw) bokuto x top!male reader

pronouns: he/him (FEMALE ORIENTED DNI!!)

warnings: begging, reader is a bottom to begin with, public sex (?) (fucking in a locker room where no ones there), creampie, a tiny bit of overstimulation, degredation if u squint and praise. spit as lubrication, finger sucking.

a/n: i’m writing this at 2 am with like no energy left whatsoever please excuse me if the quality isnt as good as usual and it’s a bit shorter i swear i’m trying my best im not trynna rush requests i just have a lot and theres too many things i need to work on :(

_____

"heh? look at you now kou'...cock dripping precum and i'm not even touching it! how cute~"

"p-please y/n just start moving already i want it so bad…" bokuto whimpered, settled on your cock while you relaxed on the bench.

"if you say so, my little songbird."

dating bokuto was pretty much a dream of yours. something about his positive and silly personality really made you fall in love with him. you weren't able to confess until second year when your friends pushed you. only to find out the owl looking man had a crush on you too. which explains why he was always more cheery around you than other people, maybe a little too much but you didn't mind.

your relationship fostered quickly due to the two of you already being friends and on the volleyball team. bokuto couldn't have been more happy, if he was already so ecstatic around you just as friends it's hard to imagine how excited he can be when you too are in a relationship. and as expected, his excitement was very well proven in other ways too. after both of you turned 18 in your third year, bokuto took you home right after drinking with your friends.

he's been waiting for this since his second year, a few months after you two became official. you were irresistible to him. like the himbo he is, he likes every part of you. your face, your ass, and of course your cock. every part of you excited him to the max. now that both of you are finally legal, he couldn't keep it in his pants any longer. so it was that night, you lost your virginity to the man of your dreams.

a unspoken rule but bokuto just assumed he was the top in the relationship. you didn't have any complaints about it since he was good with it. his stamina was over the roof for what an average person at his age should be. not only his stamina but also his cock. it makes you feel good everytime no exceptions. you also don't know where he learned it but the tricks he pulled off simply felt heavenly. every movement, every spot he reached and every word he said makes you closer and closer to an orgasm than you already were when you're with him. it's been like that in the bedroom ever since then and neither of you had the thought of changing it, until today.

you two were doing your usual flirting after the clock after practice. cleaning up the courts together and hanging away the nets. all your other teammates usually just give you an eye roll and leave the gym before you even get the chance to change. leaving the two of you alone, yet again, in the locker rooms.

"bo' are you hungry? we can grab something on the way back if you are-" your sentence was cut off when the taller male approached you and gave you a hug from behind.

"hehe, of course i'm hungry~ only for you though," bokuto said with a grin on his face.

"oh? what are you trying to suggest here?" you said, ruffling with his gray toned hair.

"well, no one's here anymore and it's just us...so why don't we…" he said reaching down towards your pants.

"sounds like a good idea to me~" you said, giving him a peck on the lips, making him blush.

"h-hey, why don't we try something new today! i've been meaning to ask you this-"

"oh sure what is it w-woah!"

before you knew it bokuto already dragged your pants down and got on one knee. even a dumbass would know what he's trying to do in this position.

"well well~ look what we have here." bokuto said with a smirk on his face fiddling with your cock through your underwear.

you let out a low giggle, getting the clue of what your boyfriend was trying to do.

"slow down there bo' no need to rush" you said as you removed your underwear too and let held it in your hands in front of bokuto's mouth.

"go on, this is what you wanted right?"

bokuto was a little startled due to the change of energy from you and gulped a group of spit down his throat. but eagerly, he still began to work on your cock with his mouth.

he was clumsy with it and you could tell he'd never given a blowjob in his life before. but you gotta admit, his attempt of trying to please you, doing something new like this for the first time was incredibly cute. he struggled a little trying to take in your entire cock and due to his gag reflex not being the best you could hear some gagging noises coming in between your thighs.

"oh fuck…just like that kou' you're doing so well…" you said, pressing your hand into his hair and slowly adapting a rhythm.

bokuto's eyes became hazy and you could tell he was getting lost in your cock. you looked down to see his shorts forming a wet spot where his hard cock is. you pulled him away from your cock and leaned back on the bench, leaving him begging for something to fill him.

"c'mon, big boy, isn't this what you wanted?"

too lost for words your boyfriend simply climbed on top of you and took off his trousers too, leaving both of your hard cocks exposed.

"why don't we get started, suck on these fingers with that pretty mouth of yours won't you baby?" you said sitting back up and leaning a bit towards bokuto.

"y-yes y/n…" bokuto said as he closed his eyes and took two of your fingers into his mouth, gradually taking three.

"that's it good boy~ but…i think you've had enough of that now." you pulled you fingers out of bokuto's mouth, leaving him yet again empty.

"lean in on my shoulders ko' that's right...just, like, that"

you slowly moved your already wet fingers into bokuto's ass, starting with two to loosen him up and moving on to three to further stimulate his pleasure point.

"a-ah fuck! y/n what is that! i-it feels weird…" he whined as you pressed again and again on his prostate.

"oh you'll see bo' it'll make you feel so much better in just a minute…" you said pulling out your fingers and pushing bokuto back in a position where you can see him while he rides you.

"go on, i know you want it inside you~"

you could tell bokuto was nervous but he gathered the courage to place your hard cock inside him, with a lot of effort of course. he moaned in pain and pleasure as you enter him entirely. waiting for him to settle in, you cup his cheek to tell him how good he's being.

"heh... look at you now kou...cock dripping precum and i'm not even touching it! how cute~"

"p-please y/n just start moving already i want it so bad…" bokuto whimpered, settled on your cock while you're relaxed on the bench.

"if you say so, my little songbird."

you began to move, answering his request. slowly of course, you didn't want to hurt him being his first time and all even though you know he likes it rough. as your thrusts became harder and faster you could hear bokuto's painful moans become more pleasurable ones.

"y-y/n fuck me, oh fuck me it feels so fucking good!"

"yah baby boy? you like that don't you, such a slut for my cock, filling you like it's the only thing you could think of."

sooner or later bokuto couldn't hold it in anymore, his pre was leaking a lot more and you could tell he was close.

"y/n i'm coming oh fuck~"

"fuck...me too bo'!" you said while cumming inside of your boyfriend. one hand stroking his cumming and already sensitive cock and the other grabbing onto his tight ass.

needless to say he passed out from the pleasure coming from both his behind and front, leaving you holding him in the mess the both of you made.

"guess we might have to change some rules in the bedroom now huh?"

#haikyuu!!#haikyuu x reader #haikyuu x reader smut #haikyuu x male reader #haikyuu x male reader smut #haikyuu x m!reader #haikyuu x m!reader smut #hq smut #hq x reader #hq x reader smut #hq x male reader #hq x male reader smut #bokuto #bokuto x reader #bokuto koutarou #bokuto x reader smut #bokuto x male reader #bokuto x male reader smut #bokuto smut

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tobesolonely · 4 years

Text

kindergarten teachers

summary: teacher!harry and coworker y/n have a hard time coming to terms with their feelings for each other

a/n: ahhh she’s finally done! i’ve been working on this fic for sooo long and i hope u all like it! big thanks to @queencharry for helping me when i got stuck and beta reading, and @behindthatbabyface for beta reading as well and giving me feedback!! i appreciate u both <3 enjoy ~11.3k words of some mutual pining and teacher!h interacting with lil kindergarteners 🥺also i am sorry if theres any major grammar mistakes (as always) or crazy typos, i always miss some things when i go back and proofread that im sure i’ll catch later! thank u

warnings: smut, mentions of alcohol

talk to me about harry and y/n! let me know your thoughts!!

my ko-fi! thank you :)

From the time you were very young, you knew you wanted to be a teacher. One of your earliest childhood memories was going to school dressed up as one for career day. Your usually untamed hair was pulled back into a sleek bun (courtesy of your mother), and you donned a funky baby-pink sweater. For bottoms, you wore the closest thing to a pencil skirt you had in your five-year-old wardrobe. When you look back on the photographs your mother took of you that day, you did not resemble a teacher in any way. You were sure if you had not done your Career Day presentation in front of the whole class, no one would have even known who you were dressed up as.

Once you moved onto college and declared Education as a major, that was when people really started to let you hear their opinions on the career path you wanted to pursue. It seemed like whenever you went home for a holiday, relatives were always in your ear saying, “You know teachers don’t make a lot of money, right? Have you ever considered something in the sciences?”. You always responded, “I know, but what would the world do without teachers?”.

Eventually, you finished your undergraduate career, successfully completed student teaching with the highest praise from your superiors and colleagues, obtained your teaching credentials, and even went back to school to get your Master’s degree. So, it was much to everyone’s surprise when you settled on being a Kindergarten teacher. People assumed that because you completed so much schooling, you wanted to be a university professor. However, the thought never even crossed your mind. You always thought Kindergarten teachers were the most impressionable people out there and knew you wanted to be one.

To you, there was no greater responsibility than that of a Kindergarten teacher. It was your responsibility to teach your students reading, writing, art, and music at the most basic level. You showed them how to play with others, how to be kind, and give them the tools necessary to succeed once they leave your classroom. You were the first teacher your students ever had, so you needed to make them fall in love with school instead of hate it, considering they’d have to stick to it until they were at least eighteen.

You’ve been a credentialed Kindergarten teacher for the last three years, and you’ve loved every moment of it. You were one of the younger teachers at school, but you never felt left out. Your colleagues were amazing people who often shared tips and tricks they wish they knew when they first started teaching.

Now, you were groggily unlocking the door to your classroom, feeling those first-day-of-school jitters you always felt. You knew kindergarteners weren’t there to harshly critique you. Still, you wanted them to go home and tell their parents about how excited they were to have you as a teacher, not run home in tears. That never happened, of course, but you didn’t want to take any chances. You drop your keys and mutter a quiet, “Shit!” setting your travel mug filled with coffee on the ground and readjust the box of donuts you had for your kids on your hip. As you reach for your keys, you hear a deep voice ask if you need help. You quickly turn around, eyes wide from being startled.

“Oh! You scared me,” you place your free hand over your chest. “But yeah, actually, that’d be great. I’m struggling to get my door open.” The man nods, his own keys he wore around his neck jangling as he retrieves first your keys, then your coffee mug.

“I’m Harry– Mr. Styles, if you want,” he holds your keys out for you to take, your coffee mug still in his large hands. “Uh, I’m the new Kindergarten teacher.” You give him a confused look and trade the box of donuts in your arms for your keys, opening the door. “The last one, Mrs. Brown, I think it was, I guess she decided a few weeks back that she wanted to retire.” You get your door open and walk inside your classroom, turning on the lights. It was a little stuffy, considering you hadn’t been there to open any windows in about a month.

“Oh, that’s right! Welcome,” you give him a warm smile. “I’m Y/N– Miss Y/L/N if you want.” A slight blush appears on his cheeks. “We’re gonna be working together then, it seems. Don’t get me wrong, I loved Mrs. Brown, but it’ll be nice to collaborate with someone closer to my age, you know?” Harry nods, and you realize he still had your coffee mug and box of donuts in his hands. “You can just set that on my desk, thanks for helping out. Would you like a donut?”

“Um, I- it’s okay,” he stammers, setting the items down. “Sorry, it’s just that I’ll probably crash if I have a donut first thing in the mornin’.” You smile at him and move to open all your windows and the back door, wanting the stuffy classroom to air out a bit before the children got here.

“I totally get that,” you giggle, walking back over to your desk. “Are you excited about the first day? I always get a little nervous. I also talk a lot when I’m nervous, I’m sure you caught onto that.”

For the first time that morning, Harry laughs. “Yeah, I’m nervous, too. ’ve never taught in the States before, so this is a bit new to me.” He’s playing with the keys hanging from his lanyard.

“I noticed you had an accent, but I didn’t know if it was weird to ask about it. What brings you to California?” You open the box of donuts and take one out, wanting to eat it before it gets cold, and the glaze hardens.

“Uh, I went to University here, but when I graduated, I decided to go back home and teach for a couple of years. I really missed being here though and wanted to come back, so I got my credentials, and uh, here I am,” he tells you with a grin, and you notice he has deep dimples.

“Well, we’re glad you’re here,” you tell him earnestly. “The kids are just gonna love your accent, too!” you joke and Harry laughs for the second time that day.

“If all else fails, ’m hopin’ to charm everyone over with my accent,” he stares at you for a moment before speaking again. “Well, I better finish getting situated. It’s fifteen til, and I reckon the children will be arriving soon, yeah?” He asks. You nod.

“Best to be waiting at parent drop-off too, there are always a few parents that are just as nervous as their babies, if not more, and could use a quick pep talk.”

“Thanks for lettin’ me know. I was thinking about standing out there anyway, just to make a good first impression.” You take another bite of your donut, giving him a thumbs up.

“You’ve got this, Harry. I know you’re not completely clueless since you’ve taught before, but I know the first day can be a little intimidating. You know where I am if you need anything.” He gives you a grateful smile, quietly thanking you before turning to walk out the door. You’re left thinking about your new coworker, only being pulled from your thoughts of him when the first bell rings.

“Good morning everyone, my name is Miss Y/L/N. Are you all excited to get this school year started?” A chorus of high-pitched yeses fills the room, and you smile warmly at your class. “I’m so excited that you’re all here! I have a little surprise for each of you!” You grab the box of donuts and walk back to the rug in the center of the room that the children usually sat on for storytime. Little gasps fill your ears, and they all say, “Donuts!” and “Yummy!”. You smile at the kids again, already feeling overwhelmed with how adorable they were.

“We all get a donut?” one little girl asks, her eyes wide. You nod at her.

“Of course! Everyone will get a donut, sweetie.” You move to get the plastic food gloves you kept so you can safely hand out a donut to everyone. “Okay guys, I’m going to pass a stack of napkins around the room. Take one and pass the stack to the person sitting next to you. Does that make sense?” All the students nod their heads in confirmation, so you grab a stack and hand them to the child sitting closest to you. “Once the last person has their napkin, let me know, and then it’ll be donut time!” You say this over-enthusiastically, and the children squirm in their seats in excitement.

As you go around handing out donuts to each of your students, you learn their names and ask them to tell you one fun fact about them. Most children say things like, “I have a brother/sister!” or “I can run really fast!”, and you find it absolutely adorable. One thing you loved the most about teaching five-year-olds was their ability to think everything was cool. It was comforting to know that no matter what you did, they’d find you cool, and your first-day jitters quickly dissipated. As the children eat their donuts, you read them a story, putting on different voices for all the various characters. You show them how to raise their hand when they have something they’d like to share and remind them to use their “listening ears” when you or one of their classmates are speaking.

When it’s time for recess, you show them how to line up quietly at the door, and assign a line leader and a hall monitor. You remind the children that they will all get a turn at these tasks eventually because it’ll switch every week, and not to worry. As you’re walking down the hall backward (one of your teachers walks that you’d finally perfected), you hear Harry’s voice.

“Okay Room Ten, we’re gonna go out to the playground now, where you all will get to play every recess and lunch. That sounds like fun, doesn’t it?” He asks them, and you hear little voices chattering out to him in excitement. You can’t help but peek into his classroom as you walked by, as his door was open. He didn’t see you because he was busy organizing his class into a straight line, so you keep going. Your class, who, much to your surprise, was walking very quietly, got loud once they saw the Kindergarten play area had a slide and monkey bars.

“We get to play on this?” one of your students, Destiny, questions.

“Yup! This is a pretty cool play area, isn’t it?” They nod and stare at you, waiting for direction. “Oh, you can all go play and run around, get some of that energy out. When the bell rings, though, I want you to listen to the yard teachers because they’re gonna help get you all lined back up so we can go back inside. Deal?” The children give you nods and thumbs up, and you grin at them, telling them to have fun and be nice to one another. As you’re turning to go to the teacher’s lounge to refill your mug of coffee, you see Harry walking down the hallway with his class, and decide to wait for him. He gives his class the same spiel you gave yours and tells them to “Treat each other with kindness” before noticing you waiting for him.

“Hey,” he gives you a grin, looking far more relaxed than he did when you saw him earlier that morning. “How’s it going so far?”

“It’s great,” you reply, leading him in the direction of the teacher’s lounge. “They’re all adorable.”

“Yeah, don’t know what I was so nervous fo’. They’re great. Also, you’re right,” Harry has an amused look on his face. “The first thirty minutes of ’em bein’ there was just them askin’ me to say things because they think I sound funny.”

“I told you!” you exclaim, laughing at him. “A British accent is definitely not something we hear every day, not here at least.”

“I figured,” he replies, and silence falls between you. “Where are we going, by the way?”

You stop in front of a blue door and sift through the keys on your lanyard, finally finding the one you were looking for. “Teacher’s lounge. Have you had the chance to check it out yet?” He shakes his head, and you pull open the door after having unlocked it. “After you.” He shakes his head and steps back, signaling you go ahead of him. You quirk an eyebrow at him, and he gives you a defensive look.

“What? ‘M a gentleman. Ladies first,” he insists, holding the door open. You walk inside the room, trying to refrain from rolling your eyes. There aren’t many teachers in the lounge. You figure they all must be in their classrooms, trying to do some last-minute organization and lesson planning amidst the first day of school chaos. However, a few colleagues that you’re rather fond of are in the room, so you take it upon yourself to introduce them to Harry.

“Hello everyone, I hope you’re all having a relaxing morning!” They chuckle lightly at your sarcasm. “I’d like you all to meet Mr. Harry Styles. He’s the new Kindergarten teacher that took Mrs. Brown’s place.” A look of realization washes over all three teachers’ faces, and they warmly greet him. Harry goes around, shaking each of their hands, voice dripping with charm.

“Lovely to meet you all. Looking forward to collaborating,” he tells them quietly. They begin engaging in polite conversation, so you leave Harry’s side, walking over to the coffee station to get what you came for before recess was over. He joins you shortly after, grabbing a disposable cup. “They were a nice bunch.” He mutters, pouring the steaming coffee into his cup. You hum in agreement.

“Everyone here is nice. The lounge is usually much more crowded than this. Everyone else must be in their rooms,” you flick your wrist up to check the time. “We got some time to sit down and breathe for a bit if you’d like? Unless you wanted to get back to your room.”

“‘M in no rush, trust me,” he tells you, flashing you a small smile. “Let’s take a seat.” Harry walks over to an unoccupied couch and sits down slowly, taking care not to spill his coffee.

“You didn’t want a lid?” you question when you see him struggling. He shrugs.

“Not necessary. Jus’ some extra plastic,” you hum and look down at your lap. You were quickly learning that Harry was not a big talker, and he liked to get his point across in as few words as possible. Him being a Kindergarten teacher contradicted heavily with his rather bashful demeanor, but that just made him all the more endearing to you.

“Do you live nearby, or is your commute long?” you ask him after a few moments of silence. As soon as you ask the question, you internally cringe, feeling like it was too invasive. If Harry thought the question was weird, he doesn’t show it.

“I live in town. I actually walked here today, believe it or not,” he tells you with a chuckle. “Was such a beautiful morning that I figured I should.” Every time you think Harry can’t possibly get any more captivating, he does, and you find yourself biting back a smile.

“How long is your walk?” You cross your legs and then uncross them, a nervous habit that you had. Harry takes a sip of coffee, mulling your question over.

“I’d say it took me about twenty minutes. I was walkin’ at a pretty leisurely pace, though,” Harry shrugs. “How about you? Do you live nearby?”

“I also live in town, but I’m way too lazy to walk, so props to you,” you smile. “The best thing about living around here is seeing your kids out in public. It’s the cutest thing.” Harry smiles, not saying anything else. A silence falls over the two of you again but instead of feeling the need to fill it, you just sit beside him, drinking your coffee. Your mind wanders off to what you were going to do for the rest of the school day, if you had enough groceries in your apartment for dinner or if you should go grocery shopping after work, and if you remembered to pay your bills on time. The bell rings to signify the end of recess, and you jump slightly.

“Ready to go back?” Harry asks, standing up and walking back over to the coffee station. “Think’m gonna get a bit more.” You go to stand by the door, waiting for him to pour another cup of coffee. He quickly rejoins you, and the coffee sloshes a bit, some getting on his hand, but he doesn’t seem to notice. “Hope those lil’ buggers got some of their energy out.”

“Right! Mine was even more hyper than they probably would’ve been ’cause I gave them those donuts this morning,” you laugh. “So, for my sake, I hope so too.” When you and Harry arrive back at the Kindergarten play area, your classes are already lined up quietly awaiting instruction, thanks to the yard teachers. You and Harry both thank them and move to stand in front of your kids.

“Miss Y/L/N,” one of your children calls out from the back of the line. “Can we get more donuts when we go back inside?” You see Harry smile out of the corner of your eye as he’s giving instruction to his class.

“There are no more donuts, you guys ate them all! I have something even cooler than donuts planned for us, though, okay? Now, remember what I told you all about walking quietly, right? Mr. Line Leader, how does your line look? Do you think we’re all set to go back inside?” The child you appointed line leader turns around to look at everyone, occasionally shushing some people. After a few moments, he turns back to you, giving you a thumbs up.

Harry moves to stand beside you, leaning down to whisper in your ear. “Wanna eat lunch together and do some planning? I feel like it would be a good idea for us to be teachin’ the same things, more or less.” Your body feels warm all over, and you just look at him and nod, not trusting yourself to speak. Harry smiles and places a hand on your shoulder. At a normal volume, he says, “See you then, Miss Y/L/N.”

Upon entering Harry’s room, you’re immediately met with the scent of vanilla and the loud hum of the air conditioning. It was bright, adorably decorated, and surprisingly decluttered. It was the polar opposite of your room, and you found it very welcoming and comforting. “Nice set-up you’ve got going on in here,” you tell him. He jumps in his seat at his desk, not having heard you come in.

“Fucks sake,” he mumbles, face going red. “You scared me. Thanks, though. My sister helped me decorate, I don’t really have an eye for this type of stuff.” He rubs the back of his neck, sheepishly.

“Well, if you ever need any help decorating for back to school and your sister isn’t around, I’d be more than happy to help.” Harry smiles and suddenly gets up from his chair, offering it to you.

“Please, take my seat. I’ll just sit in one of the kids’ chairs,” he rolls it towards you, and you shake your head, about to object, but he interrupts you. “It’s okay, Y/N. Their chairs aren’t that bad.” You take the seat Harry was just in, mumbling a quiet thank you. He hums and pulls a tiny chair up beside you, legs scraping loudly across the floor. When he sits down in it, you can’t but burst out laughing.

“Harry, that chair is so tiny! Are you sure you don’t want me to sit there instead? You look so uncomfortable,” you tell him in between laughs. “This is your classroom, after all, I’m just a guest.” Harry shakes his head, cheeks flushed.

“It’s okay, Y/N, really. ‘M perfectly comfortable in this lil’ miniature chair,” he looks at the lunch bag you sat on his desk. “What’s for lunch?” You reach for your sack and unzip it, pulling out a pre-packaged salad from Trader Joe’s.

“I’m very lazy when it comes to packing my lunches,” you admit sheepishly, pulling out a fork. “How about you? Did you eat already?”

“Oh yeah, I had a green smoothie. Not a big lunch guy,” he replies calmly. “Wanna get started with planning? I think we only have about thirty minutes left.” He looks down at his watch to confirm the time. Harry opens his planner, and you see pages filled with his neat, blocky scrawl. He jumps right into talking about the ideas he had in mind, excitement filling his voice that you haven’t yet heard.

The passion and enthusiasm he has for teaching are evident through the way he tells you about the activities he has planned, new materials and teaching methods he wants to try implementing, and things he’s tried before that didn’t work out the way he wanted them to. He asks you for your advice and listens intently when you speak, jotting down notes.

You find yourself having to mentally remind yourself not to stare at him. He was a handsome man– there was no denying that. He had curly brown hair, soft and wild-looking, the most beautiful green eyes you’d ever seen, and arms covered in tattoos. You also noticed he had the tiniest cross on his left hand. You wanted to ask him about it, but you figured that was a conversation for another time.

“Y/N? Did you hear what I just said,” Harry asks, giving you a concerned look. “Are you alright? I think you just zoned out for a couple minutes or somethin’.” You nod quickly, feeling your palms growing sweaty.

“Oh yeah, sorry, I was just thinking about something I have to do later. What did you just say?” You play off how you were just wholly drooling over your new coworker, feeling scrutinized under his piercing gaze.

“Jus’ got an email from the principal. Said we have a faculty meetin’ after school at three. Wanna go together?” He asks. You know Harry’s asking you to accompany him primarily because you’re the only person he really knows so far. However, it still makes you feel warm and special. “He said we’re gonna go over some planning for the Fall Festival. What’s that?”

“Oh, it’s just the back-to-school festival. It’s adorable,” you explain. “It’s like a mini carnival that we have right here on the playground. Every year they have teachers host booths. It’s a great way to get to meet your kids’ parents and bond with the other faculty.” Harry nods, standing up from the tiny chair right as the bell signifying the end of lunch rings.

“That sounds lovely,” he chirps, smiling down at you. “We’re gonna have the best booth out of everyone Y/N, trust me.” He jokes, the corner of his eyes crinkling. This was the most Harry had talked since you met him that morning and you were enjoying witnessing him open up to you more and more with each conversation shared.

“It is,” you stand up as well, gathering your trash and empty lunch pail. “Thanks for having me, Harry. Next time we can meet in my room. I wouldn’t mind making this a daily thing.” As soon as the words came out of your mouth, you physically wince, figuring Harry had to think you were obsessed with him at this point. He looks down, the corners of his mouth upturned when he makes eye contact with you again.

“I’d like that, Y/N. I’ll actually start bringin’ a proper lunch, so you’re not the only one eating,” you smile. “I’ll meet you in your room after school?” You nod in confirmation, walking out the door in front of him.

“See ya later.”

“Did everyone have a good day today?” You ask your class, walking backward to the dismissal gate. You’re met with a chorus of cheerful sounding ‘yeses,’ and you place your hand over your heart in a dramatic fashion. “That makes me so happy, everyone! You’re all incredible little people, and I think we’re gonna have a fantastic year. What do you guys think?” The children chatter excitedly, glad to have made it through their first day of school and see their parents on the other side of the gate eagerly awaiting them, cell phones snapping pictures.

Harry’s already at the gate, waiting for the bell to ring so he can dismiss his class. He’s walking down the line asking each of the children if they see who they’re supposed to go home with, crouching down to their height so they can point them out to him. Some children in his class look a little upset because they don’t see their parents yet. Harry quickly consoles them, telling them they can all play a fun game together while they wait for their ‘Mummies and Daddies.’

You do the same with your kids, and by the time the bell rings and you finish dismissing the ones who saw someone there to pick them up, there was one child from your class who was still waiting and two from Harry’s. He walks over to you, one of their tiny hands in each of his. The boy looks unbothered, but the girl was beginning to cry.

“Hey, Ava, should we ask Miss Y/L/N and her friend if they want to play iSpy with us? The more, the merrier, isn’t that right?” He looks down at her, and she nods, looking down. You figure she’s one of his more shy students he was telling you about earlier.

“Hi, sweetie! I’m Miss Y/L/N, are you waiting for your mom or dad?” She nods, biting her lip. You turn and gesture to your one student who was waiting as well. “Well, so is she! Don’t worry, they’ll be here.”

“I’m Matthew,” the little boy holding Harry’s other hand informs you, shifting from foot to foot. You give him a big smile.

“Hello, Matthew! I love your Spiderman shirt; he’s just the coolest. Jade, do you want to introduce yourself to Mr. Styles, Ava, and Matthew? Remember when we learned about introductions today in class? When you got to introduce yourself to all your classmates?”

Jade nods, a big, toothy grin on her face. “Hi! My name is Jade, and I am five-years-old but my birthday is September 19th, so I’m actually almost six-years-old,” she tells them matter-of-factly. “It’s very nice to meet you!” She adds, remembering the script you gave them earlier. Harry looks down at her, an impressed look on his face.

“Well, it is very lovely to meet you too, Jade! Do we all know how to play iSpy?” Jade and Matthew shout in excitement, but Ava just grips tighter onto Harry’s hand. He looks down at her again. “Do y’ want Miss Y/L/N and I to show you how to play, Ava?” His voice is very quiet, slow, and soothing. She nods, letting go of his hand.

“Well Ava,” you say, looking around for something to start the game out with. “I would say, “I spy with my little eye something green. Then you, Mr. Styles, Matthew, and Jade, would have to look around and name out everything that’s green. If you name something and it’s not it, then I will tell you nope, and you can try again, but if you figure it out, then you’re the winner! Does that make sense?”

She nods, and you see a gleam of excitement in her eyes. “Can I go first?” She asks quietly. You tell her, yes, and she looks around quickly, trying to find something to say. “I spy with my little eye something blue!” She has a triumphant smile on her face, and even though you immediately know she’s talking about the sky and you’re sure Harry does too, you both decide to take a step back and let the children take the game into their own hands.

“Y’know, that lil’ introduction Jade gave was really somethin’. I didn’t even think about teachin’ my kids that. Think I’ll try that out tomorrow,” Harry whispers, craning his neck slightly to be at your ear. You shiver at the feeling of his warm breath against your skin.

“Yeah, I feel like that’s always a good first day of school activity for them to do. A lot of them have never really been exposed to people outside of their immediate family, so they’re not too sure how to talk to others.” Harry hums, standing back up straight.

“Mr. Styles,” Matthew calls, running over to Harry. “My mommy is here. Can I go now?” Harry nods, telling Matthew to wait for him so he can say hi to his mother. You watch as he walks away, overhearing as he tells the boy’s mother what a great job he did today and how he’s so excited to go through this school year with him in his class. Ten minutes later, Jade and Ava are gone as well, and Harry locks the dismissal gate.

“I forgot how exhausting the first day could be,” he tells you, letting out a quiet sigh. “Ready to go to that meeting, though? It’s just about three.” You check your watch and see the time read at 2:57 PM.

“Yeah, just let me grab my bag, and we can head over there. I’m really hoping this won’t take too long; I was planning on going grocery shopping after this,” you walk down the hall towards your classroom and feel Harry’s gaze on you.

“Where do you like to go grocery shopping?” he asks after a few moments of silence. “I need to pick up some groceries this week, too. ’ve been eatin’ takeout for the past week, and I’m starting to feel like shit.” You laugh, unlocking your door. Harry stands outside, holding it open while you grab your purse and lunch bag.

“Honestly, I don’t have a preference. I switch it up a lot,” you shrug, making sure all the windows are closed before walking out. “Was there something, in particular, you were looking for?”

“Uh,” Harry scratches the back of his head. “No? Maybe you could text me a list of all your favorite stores, though. Jus’ so I won’t forget.”

You quirk an eyebrow at him, ignoring how fast your heart was beating. “Are you asking for my number, Mr. Styles?”

“I guess I am,” he replies nonchalantly. “We’re gonna be workin’ together a lot. Might as well have your number– if that’s okay, I mean.” He looks down at you.

“Yeah, remind me after the meeting,” you tell him, trying your hardest to play it cool. “Don’t let me forget.”

“Trust me, I won’t.”

“So Y/N and Harry, you two will be in charge of the pumpkin decorating booth? Is that right?” The principal looks down at his notes and then shifts his gaze between the both of you. You both nod.

“Yeah, I’m excited! I think it’ll be a lot of fun,” you reply excitedly. “We can go to the craft store and get a bunch of paints, but where do you think the best place to get the pumpkins would be?” You pull out your planner, ready to jot down any suggestions.

“You two could try going to a pumpkin patch? They’re starting to pop-up around town,” one teacher suggests. “I’m sure if you purchased a bunch and told them it was for a school event, we could get some kind of deal.” The rest of the faculty buzzes in agreement.

“Y/N and Harry, could you get to a pumpkin patch sometimes this week and see if they can give us an estimate of how much it would cost? Then I could let the PTA know.” You and Harry confirm that it will be possible to do sometime this week, and the meeting continues on.

By the time you’re finally free to leave the meeting, it’s already growing dark outside. Harry’s hands are shoved in his pockets, and he’s looking down at his feet. “So–”

“Do you want–”

You both stop, laughing awkwardly. “You go first.” you tighten the grip on your purse.

“Uh, I was jus’ gonna ask if I could get your number now. Yanno, so we can plan when we’re gonna go get all the stuff for our booth? And you still gotta tell me what your favorite grocery stores are,” he has a playful look in his eyes. For the thousandth time that day, your hands become clammy. There was just something about every interaction you had with him that made you so nervous.

“Oh yeah,” you answer coolly, digging in your purse for your phone. “Just text your number, so I have it.” You hand him his phone, and he stops dead in his tracks, a look of concentration on his face.

“I can’t walk and be on the phone at the same time,” he mutters when he looks back up and realizes you were watching him the whole time. “I don’t know how people do it.” He hands you back your phone. “What were y’ gonna ask me?”

“I was just um, I was gonna ask if you wanted me to give you a ride home? I mean, since you walked to work today and it’ll be dark soon,” talking to Harry made you feel like a nervous school girl interacting with her first crush, and you hated that feeling.

“I couldn’t ask you to do that–”

“It’s no bother, really,” you cut him off, and you realize you sound a little eager, but at that point, you didn’t even care. “I’m sure we don’t live too far from each other.” Harry looks slightly unsure but nods, and you let out a breath you didn’t even know you were holding.

“If you’re sure, Y/N. I appreciate it, I owe you one,” he’s following behind you to the teacher parking lot. You silently pray your car isn’t messy inside like it usually is as you approach it. You decide to pick up your pace and walk ahead of him, telling yourself if the passenger side was messy, you’d just quickly throw everything in the back. “Heyyyy, why’re you walkin’ so fast? Are you sure you’ve got the time to take me home?” He takes a few big strides and quickly catches up with your hurried, tiny ones.

“Yeah, of course, I have time,” you respond, unlocking your car as you approach it. “If it’s messy, then just ignore it.” you preface, honestly not remembering the state in which you left your car this morning when you walked into work.

“Don’t worry about it. You should see mine,” Harry jokes, and it immediately puts you at ease. As you’re about to open your door, Harry quickly rushes to your side, opening it himself. “Let me.”

His hand rests over yours, and you quickly pull it away, your body heating up. “Harry, I’m already right here. I can open my own car door.”

“I know you can. But I’m a gentle—“

“You’re a gentleman, I know,” you playfully roll your eyes and take a step back, allowing Harry to open your car door all the way. You couldn’t lie and say you weren’t flattered and honestly a little bit turned on. He flashes you a smile as you situate yourself behind the wheel of the car and makes sure you’re all the way in before slamming it shut. You see him lightly jog around to the passenger side, and soon enough, he’s beside you, your car immediately starting to smell like his cologne.

“What music do you like to listen to?” Harry asks, pulling his phone out of his pocket.

“You ask me a lot of random questions, Harry,” you reply, looking behind you as you slowly back out.

“Is it a crime to wanna get to know my new coworker?” you can hear a smile in his voice. “C’mon. What’s your favorite music to listen to?”

You shrug, looking both ways before exiting the parking lot. “Where do you live?”

“I don’t know my address yet. Just take a left at this light coming up. Favorite music?” Out of the corner of his eye, you see him scrolling through his music library.

“You don’t know your address yet?”

“No. I’ll play something random,” he says, tapping his hand on his knee. “You can take a right at that stop sign up there.” You put on your blinker and glance over your shoulder before switching lanes. Harry quickly pairs his phone with your Bluetooth, and a song you’re unfamiliar with blares through your speakers. Neither one of you says anything else, only speaking to each other when he’s giving you directions to his house, and you’re confirming what he said.

After two more songs, Harry says, “S’right up here.” He’s led you to a beautiful apartment complex— one you were looking at when you were moving out of your parent’s home but just couldn’t afford as a new graduate. You expertly parallel park and then turn the car off, a silence falling between the two of you.

“This is a nice complex,” you tell him after a moment. “Really close to school. I see why you opted to walk to work today.”

“Mhm,” he hums. His seatbelt is still fastened. “I understand if you’re busy, but did you wanna come in?” You raise an eyebrow at him, and he quickly backtracks. “I mean— it’s just— remember the activity you taught your kids today? About introductions? Jus’ wanted to know if you could walk me through it, that’s all.”

“Oh. Well yeah, I can hang out for a bit.” You unbuckle your seatbelt and reach in the backseat for your purse that you threw haphazardly over your shoulder earlier.

“Will your boyfriend be okay with you coming in, though?” He’s chewing on the inside of his cheek.

“What makes you think I have a boyfriend?” You’re slightly taken aback and oddly flattered that he thought you were in a relationship.

“I dunno,” his face grows red. “You got all weird when I opened doors for ya. Figured you had a boyfriend.”

“I don’t.”

“Cool.” More silence falls, this time an awkward one.

“Should we go inside now?” you unlock the doors, quickly getting out of the car. Harry follows behind you and waits for you to walk onto the sidewalk before going up the walkway.

“How close do you live to me?” Harry asks, punching in his gate code. He pulls the gate open and gestures for you to go ahead of him. You decide not to comment on it this time.

“A couple blocks away. I could probably walk over here if I was in the mood to,” Harry shuts the gate behind you and walks over to the first set of stairs, taking them two at a time. “I was interested in this complex when I was moving out of my parents’ but I settled on something else.” He hums, stopping in front of the first door at the top of the stairs. There’s a brown ‘Welcome!’ mat outside his door, along with a few potted plants.

“Here we are,” he looks over his shoulder as if he’s checking if you’re still there. “Excuse the boxes. ‘M not done unpacking yet.” He pushes open the door and steps in, quickly turning on the light. You’re met with the same sweet scent of vanilla that’s in his classroom. Considering he was in the process of unpacking, his apartment was reasonably tidy.

“It looks good in here,” your heart felt like it was going to beat out of your chest. You were in your coworker’s house that you just met that day, and you could already feel yourself developing a crush on him. There was obviously no way you’d let this relationship progress past anything strictly professional, but that didn’t mean you weren’t allowed to admire his beauty.

“Thanks,” he gives you a smile, relief washing over his face. “You can set your bag down if you want. Take a seat, make yourself at home.” He leaves the room, and you hear him rattling around in the kitchen. “Can I get you anything to drink? Wine? Coffee? Tea?”

“Coffee sounds great,” you reply. You set your purse down on his coffee table and sit on the edge of his couch, inspecting his living room closer. There were two books on the table, both flipped upside down as a way to mark his page. There were a few more plants inside, similar to the ones in front of his door. There was a framed picture of him with two beautiful women you assumed to be his mother and sister. Harry comes back into the room a few minutes later, two steaming cups of black coffee in hand.

“Here you are, Miss Y/L/N,” he puts on an exaggerated posh accent, and you giggle.

“Why thank you, Mr. Styles,” you respond in the same voice. “Do you have cream and sugar?”

He wrinkles his nose. “I think I might have sugar. Is oat milk, okay? I don’t have cream.” He goes back to his kitchen to retrieve the items before you can tell him it’s okay, and you’ll just drink it black. You thank him, pouring the tiniest splash of oat milk into your coffee. You can feel his eyes on you as you add a bit of sugar, stir, taste, and then add some more.

“So,” you begin after your coffee is made to your liking. “What did you think about your first day? You can be honest since we’re not on campus anymore.” Harry laughs, looking down at his fingernails.

“Uh,” he starts. You notice he says, ‘uh’ a lot. “It was terrific. Not so sure I would’ve felt the same way if I didn’t have you to help me through it.”

“We’re partners in crime now, Harry. We’re the two Kindergarten teachers, and you’re the only other person there my age? We’ve definitely gotta stick together,” you give him a big smile. He doesn’t smile back but looks a bit troubled instead. You wait for him to speak, coming to accept that long pauses were just a thing when having a conversation with Harry.

“Y’know how I assumed you had a boyfriend earlier? I thought after I’d said that–– rather I hoped after I said that you’d be like,” he clears his throat. “‘Why, no! I don’t have a boyfriend. Do you have a girlfriend?’” He put on the worst American accent you’d ever heard to imitate your voice, causing you to laugh. “To which I would’ve replied with a simple ‘no.’”

Now it’s your turn to leave Harry wondering what you’re thinking for the first time all day. You can feel his eyes on you as you look at his couch cushions, noticing a bit of crumbs that you hadn’t seen before. “Are you flirting with me?”

“I think you’re beautiful.”

“You don’t even know me. We just met today.”

“Does that mean I can’t think you’re beautiful?”

You bite your lip, feeling yourself starting to grow a bit turned on by his forwardness. There was a part of you that would risk it all for just one night in bed with Harry because you just found him that attractive. The rational, adult side of you was screaming, ‘Don’t mix business with pleasure!’. By now, you had both moved closer on the couch to one another, knees nearly touching. “I think you’re beautiful, too.” He grins, setting his coffee cup down. You do the same.

“Would it be crazy of me to tell you that I really wanna kiss you right now?” His face is mere inches from yours, so close that you could smell the coffee on his breath. You shake your head.

“No. I really wanna kiss you too.”

“C’ mere, then.”

Harry leans forward a bit more until his lips are ghosting over yours. You pull at the collar of his shirt, bringing his already close body even closer to yours. His lips are softer than they look, and he’s a better kisser than you thought he’d be, too. He brings his hands up to tangle them in your hair, and that’s when you abruptly pull away, not wanting things to go too far. “We shouldn’t…” He looks at you with sad eyes, but he nods, understanding what you mean.

“Probably not the best idea?” his response comes out as more of a question than a statement, but you nod in agreement anyway.

“Definitely not. I’m um–– I’m actually gonna go,” you stand up, slinging your purse over your shoulder. “Thanks for the coffee, Harry. I’ll see you tomorrow?”

“Yeah, see––”

You’re out the door, rushing down the stairs before he can even finish his sentence.

The rest of the school week goes on without either one of you mentioning it. It’s a little awkward for a couple of days, but by the time Friday rolls around, both of you decide the best course of action to take regarding the kiss would be to act like it never happened.

You’re in your room at lunch hanging up your kids’ artwork they made during their ‘Free Time’ this morning, having declined Harry’s lunch invitation for the fourth time that week. You decided to pretend to be busy with work so you wouldn’t be too tempted to go into his room. To most people, you’re sure it looked like you were avoiding him–– and maybe you were. However, you were trying to get over this crush on him in the best way that you knew how.

“Need some help?”

You jump, nearly falling backward off the stepstool you were on. “Holy shit, Harry! You scared the hell out of me!” You feel your body getting warm, and you quickly look away, not wanting him to see how flustered you were.

“Sorry, you weren’t answering my texts, so I decided to come see what you were up to,” he walks over to where you were standing and hands you a piece of art, smiling at it before handing it to you. “You’ve got some artists in your class.”

“Mhm,” you hum, not looking him in the eyes. You hear him let out a quiet sigh.

“Still able to go see about getting those pumpkins ordered after work?”

You had completely forgotten that you and Harry decided today would be the day you’d go get the pumpkin situated figured out for your booth. For a second, you consider making an excuse to get out of it, but you decide against it. This was something that both of you were asked to do, not just him, and you didn’t want the fact that you let your attraction to him cloud your judgment getting in the way of your professional responsibilities.

“Yeah, that works.”

He doesn’t say anything, and even though you’re not looking at him, you can see the gears in his head turning. “Should we talk––”

You’re quite literally saved by the bell, the end of lunch interrupting where you knew he was about to lead the conversation. “I’ll see you after school? Did you walk here again? I can drive.” Harry nods slowly.

“Uh, yeah. he replies. “I walked. Uh, ’m gonna go get my kids. See you after school then?”

“Yup!” you respond, fake enthusiasm in your voice. Harry gives you one more look before walking out of your room. You wait until he’s all the way down the hall before following behind him to bring your class back inside. You knew you were the one making things awkward between you and Harry. However, the realistic part of you knew getting involved with your coworker was one of the worst ideas you’d ever had in your life. For now, you’d just tell yourself that you were probably more into Harry than he was into you and pray that would be enough to make you get over your crush.

“I haven’t been to a pumpkin patch since I was a kid.” Harry stuffs his hands farther into his pockets while yours are tightly hugging your chest. You hum, not saying anything. The car ride there was a little awkward, and you were glad it was so short. You could tell there was a lot Harry wanted to say, but you were glad he wasn’t saying it. You keep seeing him glance at you, but you pretend not to notice.

“What size pumpkins should we ask for? Small ones, huh?” Harry nods, looking around in childlike awe. There was a small petting zoo, booths selling warm drinks and kettle corn, and an obscene amount of children.

You walk around together for a moment before encountering a friendly-looking employee who looked like he could help you out. Harry takes over, explaining the situation, and why you need to order one hundred tiny pumpkins. While you’re waiting for the employee to ask the owner if that would even be possible, Harry turns to face you.

“Y/N? Can we talk about what happened on Monday?” you’re about to tell him that you’d rather not, but he continues. “I felt something during that kiss, Y/N. I’m not sure if you felt it too, but I don’t want things to be awkward between us. We have to get through an entire school year working side-by-side, and if you’re not interested, then I respect that one hundred percent, but I just want––”

“So the owner said that is possible!” The employee that was helping you out comes back with a form and clipboard in their hand. “Can you just fill out some information and let us know what time you need it tomorrow? The owner said he could get it delivered and give you guys a discount since you’re ordering so much.”

“That’s great!” you exclaim, taking the form from him. You were glad to have been saved from your conversation with Harry. You quickly go through and fill out everything you can, telling them they can bill your school’s PTA.

The walk back to your car is silent. You’re replaying what Harry was saying to you over in your head, thinking about what he was going to say before he was interrupted. He opens your car door like he’s been doing, but he doesn’t make eye contact with you or say a word as he slides into the passenger seat.

“Y’can just drop me off,” Harry says quietly. He leans your seat back and closes his eyes. You wait to see if he’ll connect his phone, but he doesn’t, so you turn on the radio at a volume so low it almost can’t be heard. It takes everything in you not to speed back to his place. You just wanted him out of your car. You had such strong feelings for him that it physically hurt, and restraining yourself from telling him how you really felt was growing harder and harder.

“We’re here.” your voice is a little hoarse from not saying anything. Harry slowly opens his eyes and unbuckles his seatbelt, opening the door.

“Right. Thanks for the ride. What time do we need to be at school to set up our booth by?”

“Four. I can pick you up if you want?”

“Yeah. See you tomorrow, Y/N.” He closes the door and walks up to his gate without looking back at you once.

“Hi Miss Y/L/N! Hi Mr. Styles!”

Groups of your students had been coming up to you excitedly all evening. It made you happy to see that the Kindergarten classes were no longer divided. They were starting to hang out with one another. Their parents tell you how their children thought it was just the coolest thing to be on school grounds on a Saturday, and how even though it was only a week into the school year, they were having the best time. It was comments like this that made you fall in love with your job all over again.

Things between you and Harry were going well. It wasn’t awkward, but you think it was because you were both too busy helping children paint their pumpkins. You were glad that Harry didn’t take the bit of downtime the two of you had when no one was at your booth trying to talk about the kiss and instead talked about other random things instead. You find out he loves baking (specifically, bread), he has an obsession with old music, and has about fifty tattoos. He talks to his mom on the phone every day, and he is extremely close to his sister. You tell him about your parents’, your undergraduate experience, your hobbies, and you finally tell him what music you like to listen to.

The festival quickly comes to an end, and you find yourself sad once you and Harry are done cleaning up your booth, knowing that you were just going to drop him off at his apartment and go back to yours to spend another Saturday night alone. You get to his complex almost too quickly, and you almost want to keep going and pretend you accidentally missed it just to be with him a bit longer. Instead, you park.

“D’ya wanna come inside?” He blurts out. Even in the darkness of your car, you can tell his face is flushed. “I mean if you haven’t got plans. I know it’s a Saturday night, so I understand if––”

“Nope, I don’t have plans. I’d love to.” Your hands are shaky as you unbuckle your seatbelt. He quickly gets out of your car and runs around to your side, opening the door for you before you can do it yourself. You almost don’t even notice since it was becoming such a habit.

“I picked up this new bottle of wine a couple days ago that’ve been wanting to pop open. Think we deserve a glass or two after such a long week, hmm?” You wordlessly nod, wholly mesmerized with just how good Harry looked after such a long day of work. His curls fell perfectly across his forehead, his eyes were sparkling and full of excitement.

“A glass of wine sounds great,” you reply with a chuckle. “I’m ready to drink a whole bottle by the end of the week if I’m being honest.” Harry laughs, quickly punching in his gate code. You could see his hands shaking a little bit, but you decide not to comment on it. He takes the stairs up to his apartment two at a time like he did last time you were there, but this time there’s an urgency and clumsiness to his actions that you haven’t seen before. He jams the key in his lock, quickly shoving the door open.

His apartment is a little messier than it was when you were in it at the beginning of the week, but it’s nothing disgusting. He runs his fingers through his curls, moving aside papers that were scattered along the length of the couch. “Sorry, I was doin’ some planning. Make yourself comfortable.” He disappears to the kitchen, and moments later, you hear the pop of a wine cork and the smooth sound of him pouring the alcohol into glasses.

He emerges from his kitchen, handing you a generously poured glass of wine. “Thanks, Harry,” you tell him before taking a big sip. It was sweet, and while you usually preferred a more dry wine, it was still delicious.

“Cheers to the end of a successful first week,” he holds up his glass, and you smile, clinking yours with his. “Thanks for helpin’ me get through it, Y/N. Couldn’t have done it without you.” You give him a timid smile.

“Stop, Harry. You’re a great teacher. I can see your kids love you already,” you take another sip of wine. “I kinda do too. I mean–– that came out wrong. I don’t love you, but I do think I like you.” You didn’t know what came over you at that moment, but something told you now was the time to lay it all out on the table with Harry. He sets his glass of wine down, the biggest smile on his face.

“Really? I thought you weren’t interested. Was kinda startin’ to feel like you hate me,” he sounds a little sad. You shake your head.

“Quite the opposite, actually. I’m really into you,” you didn’t even realize how you’d inched your way towards Harry. “I’ve been trying not to think about how we kissed because we shouldn’t, you know? We’re coworkers. I’ve been trying not to think about it all week, though, and I just can’t get you out of my mind.” He stares intensely into your eyes, chewing on the inside of his cheek like he usually does when he’s thinking.

“Can I kiss you, Y/N?” he finally asks. You’re in the same position as you were last time, being mere inches away from the other’s lips. Only this time, you smell the wine on his breath, not coffee. You nod quickly, and Harry cups your face in his hands, hungrily pressing his lips against yours.

“You can do more than kiss me, actually,” you tell him breathlessly. “You can do whatever you want with me.”

Harry raises an eyebrow, a shocked look on his face. “When you say anything…” he trails off.

“I want you to fuck me, Harry,” you tell him bluntly. “Please. Been wanting that all week.” He licks his lips, looking at you in a way he hasn’t yet before.

“I can definitely do that,” he replies, resting his hand on your thigh. His large hand is dangerously close to your pussy, and you can already feel yourself growing wet. “Let’s get all these clothes off you then, huh?”

You stand up and quickly start removing your clothes. First, your blouse comes off, and that’s quickly followed by your bra. Harry’s leaning back on the couch, arms resting behind his head. “Enjoying the show?” you ask, quickly pulling down your jeans and underwear. You’re completely naked in front of him in thirty seconds flat, and you reckon that’s the fastest you’ve ever undressed for anything.

“Very much so,” he mumbles, palming himself over his khakis. “C’ mere, Y/N.” he pats his lap, and you move to sit in it, now straddling him. He softly presses his lips against yours, the hunger that was there just a moment ago completely dissipated. This was a much more hesitant kiss, more gentle and tender. “You’re really beautiful, Y/N.”

You giggle. “I know. You’ve told me that before.”

“I want you to know how much I mean it.”

“I know you do.”

Harry nods. “Can I have a taste of ya now?” you notice that his accent sounds a bit thicker than usual, voice a tad gruffer. You nod, swallowing thickly. Climbing off Harry, you lay back on the couch, situating yourself, so it’s a little more comfortable. He looks into your eyes, placing his hands on your knees. “Is this okay, Y/N?” You nod again, and he removes his hands.

“What’s wrong?” your voice has a hint of desperation in it, but after a week of extreme sexual tension, you wanted nothing more than to cum by the hands of this man.

“Wanna hear you tell me it’s okay. I don’t wanna do anything you don’t want,” he’s looking down at his hands.

“Harry, I wouldn’t have given you a striptease and laid back on this couch for you if I didn’t want it. I wholeheartedly give you permission to do whatever you want with me––”

That’s enough for him. He roughly pries your legs open, immediately licking a long stripe up your heat. You cry out, not expecting him to get right into it. You look down at him and groan when you see he’s making eye contact with you, a smug look on his face. “How’s tha’, love?” You nod, tangling your hands in his curls.

“Yeah Harry, please,” you moan. Harry sucks harshly at your clit, pulling off loudly, the sound echoing throughout his minimally furnished apartment.

“Please what, pet?” He’s looking you dead in the eyes, a devilish grin on his face while his index finger rubs small circles on your clit. Your chest is heaving up and down quickly as you try to calm your breathing down.

“Please make me cum on your tongue, Harry,” you try pushing his head back down to your cunt, but he doesn’t budge.

“Think I rather like hearin’ you beg like this fo’ me. Enjoyin’ watching you squirm like tha’, love.” Just as your about to beg for him some more to feed his inflated ego, he attaches his lips to your clit once more, this time adding his ring finger into your tight pussy. “You’re tight. Sure you’ll be able to take my cock?” His voice is muffled, and you just barely make out what he says.

You clench around his finger, and he laughs, the vibrations sending a new sensation across your clit. “Y’like thinkin’ about my cock, hmm?”

“Yeah, want you in me,” you beg, lifting your hips up. He grips onto your hips tightly, keeping you in place.

“Can feel yeh gettin’ ready for me, darlin’. Think you can take another one?” You nod, and Harry gently places kitten licks on your swollen clit while he slowly pushes his middle finger into you. You feel full in a way you haven’t felt in such a long time, and he only had two fingers in you. Once he pumps his fingers in and out of you a few times, he goes back to harshly sucking on his clit, moaning every so often so you can feel the vibrations against your cunt.

“Fuck,” you’re moaning loudly, and you pray Harry’s neighbors don’t hear you, knowing how thin apartment walls were.

“So fuckin’ wet for me, doll,” he mutters, adding another finger inside you. The burn feels amazing, and you place your hand on his wrist, urging him to go faster. “Gonna cum in my mouth, hmm? Gonna let me feel ya around m’ fingers?”

“Yes, please, Harry,” you feel yourself nearly there, your orgasm threatening to overtake you at any moment.

“Give it to me then, Y/N. Cum for me,” he demands. As soon as he says those three words, you’re done for, your body going tense as waves of pleasure roll throughout your body. He doesn’t remove his digits from the your cunt until you’re coming down from your high, placing a kiss to your clit. He laughs as you shudder at the overstimulation. Harry places his three fingers that were just inside of you and his mouth and sucks on them, not once breaking eye contact with you.

“That was really good,” you tell him, crawling on your knees towards him to place a kiss on the underside of his jaw—Harry’s beaming, a triumphant look on his face.

“Not yet. Gotta make y’ cum one more time. I’m a gentleman, after all.” You know he’s messing with you but also serious, so you lean back on the couch, opening your legs once again.

“Are you gonna take off your clothes too? Why am I the only one that’s naked?” Harry laughs, and you hear the clanking of his belt as he undoes it.

“You’re impatient, aren’t ya?” you nod, and he pulls down his tenting khakis and tight boxers. His cock springs up, slightly touching his stomach, and he hisses at the feeling. “Hold on a sec.” He gets up quickly, and you hear him hurry to what you assume in the bathroom, rummaging around. He comes back a minute later with a box of condoms, making you laugh.

“Is that a new box of condoms? Have you been holding onto those all week, Mr. Styles?” Harry rolls his eyes and opens the box, ripping open a condom expertly with his teeth.

“Weren’t you just the one beggin’ for me, pet? I’d watch it if I were you,” he jokes, rolling the condom onto his hard length. He leans down to place wet, opened mouth kisses to your breasts. “So beautiful.”

“Are you gonna take off your shirt?” you ask quietly. “I kinda wanna see all your tattoos.” Harry raises an eyebrow at you but unbuttons his shirt nevertheless, throwing it into the mess of clothes scattered around the living room. You reach your hand up, shakily tracing the swallows on his chest, moving down to the butterfly across his stomach and finally to the ferns on his abdomen. Harry’s staring down at you, watching as you delicately touch his skin. “You have so many.” you finally say. He nods.

“Yeah. Some of them I just got for the hell of it. Felt like after I got that first tattoo, it was hard to stop.” He caresses the skin on your thighs, and you shudder again. “Gonna let me get inside that pretty lil’ cunt now?”

“Please.”

Harry aligns himself with your entrance and slowly pushes into you, sharply inhaling as you clench around his length. “Relax, Y/N.’ve got ya,” he tells you reassuringly. “Can’t get inside ya if you’re all tense like tha’.” You can tell Harry’s trying his hardest not to absolutely wreck you, the vein in his forehead very prominent from clenching his jaw so tightly. You grip tightly onto his bicep, biting your lip as you adjust to his size. You were so wet and indescribably turned on that you felt every vein his thick cock had to offer, and you knew you wouldn’t last long once he started moving. By the looks of it, Harry wouldn’t either.

“You can move,” you tell him, squeezing your eyes shut. Harry slowly pulls out of you and then ever so gently sinks back inside you, bottoming out. He lets out a breathy moan, moving one of his hands up to tweak your nipples. “Harder, Harry, fuck.”

He immediately pulls out of you and slams back inside, the sounds of his balls slapping against your ass echoing in the room. You scream in pleasure, no longer caring if his neighbors hear what you two were doing.

“Like tha’?” He asks cheekily, working up a steady rhythm. You nod, gripping your boobs to keep them from bouncing. Harry shakes his head, forcefully removing your hands. “Nope, none of that. Wanna see ’em.” He takes both of your hands in one of his, pinning them up over your head. His other hand reaches in between your bodies to rub at your clit, and before you have time to warn him, you’re cumming again, squirting all over his cock.

Harry throws his head back in pleasure, his thrusts getting sloppy and frantic, and you know he’s seconds away from his own orgasm. You spur him on, telling him how badly you wanted him to come inside of you (even though he was wearing a condom). He stills moments later, shaking above you as he holds himself up with an arm, not wanting to collapse on top of you.

“Fuckin’ hell, Y/N. Why did we wait a whole week to do this again?”

#harry styles smut #harry styles #harry styles fanfiction #harry styles fluff #harry styles x reader #harry styles one shot #harry styles blurb #harry styles x y/n #harry styles fic #teacher!h

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olivyh · 3 years

Text

Twst Species headcannons

Beastmen:

-Palms and bottoms of their feet are rougher and more padded, as well as a slightly darker shade than their normal skin tone

-Legs are built similar to the hind legs of animals (with the sharp angles and little bumps)

-Start “walking” as children on all fours because it’s more comfortable due to the way their legs are built

-Many have scars under their bottom lip due to accidentally biting it bc their fangs were longer after losing their baby teeth

-Similarly, they also have small scars across various parts of their bodies due to their claws

-They can see in the dark to an extent

-Their eyes also do the glowy thing in the dark, as well as on camera

-Beastmen have very thick and coarse hair, which makes it notoriously harder to cut

-Many lion beastmen especially do not cut their hair often, as their hair symbolizes strength within their communities

-Cutting ones hair is a sign of trust in beastmen communities, considering how guarded they are with who touches their head (Patting a beastman’s head is a quick and easy way for them to get their guard down, and it takes them off high alert) as well as their ears being within constant danger near scissors.

-Beastmen do shed, a lot, like, a lot a lot

-They have been known to growl and purr like their animal counterparts, as well as hunch their backs and snarl when threatened

-Baby beastmen will bite you, as a sign of affection. They also wrestle with their caretakers from a young age to show affection as well. Grown beastmen will let the younger beastman win, regardless of species

-They also play wrestle with mates and potential mates to show their interest and affection. Not too hard, but enough to jostle the mate around. They will be absolutely smitten if the mate does it back.

-Beastmen grow up using the same sounds their animal counterparts do, as its similar to being taught a first language that the rest of your family speaks. Most aren’t taught English (Or commonspeak since England is nonexistent in Twisted Wonderland) until later in life

-Beastmen can understand similar dialects and tones of other species, and can further understand and speak a little bit of other beastmen languages

-They cannot eat certain foods that their mother species can’t. Canine beastmen cannot eat chocolate, onions, etc, feline beastmen cannot eat onions, garlic, grapes, etc etc without having issues afterwards. (This makes them a target for pranksters on NRC’s campus. Ex: The incident of Heartslabyul’s Ace Trappola switching out all the tea for coffee during the unbirthday party and Chenya unfortunately missing the cues and drinking the whole cup)

-They are very territorial to anyone besides the clan they reside with. The only people they aren’t territorial with are young children, although they are on high alert if the child’s guardian is nearby

-Beastmen will adopt a child if they see it doesn’t have a clan to stay with, regardless of species. It’s not unheard of to see a beastchild of another species or a young human in beastman clans

-I saw a hc that said that Rook is mixed beastman/human so I’m gonna roll with that for the next one: Beastmen and human mixed babies can have the same attributes as beastmen but on a tamer scale. Their vision, hearing, sense of touch and smell could be higher than a human’s but not as high as a beastmans. The ears and tail are the more dominant gene but it’s not uncommon to see a mixed beastmen/human child with more human features

-Beastmen grow larger than most humans, with the average beastmen (under the right conditions) ranging around six ft at full height. Female hyena beastmen grow taller than their male counterparts

Mer:

-They’re hypersensitive to sunlight at first and have to wear sunglasses or something shading their eyes their first few weeks on land

-They also get dehydrated very easily even in human form, so they have to carry around water bottles

-Their skin dries out quickly, so their hands and feet especially will be very dry and potentially cracking unless they moisturize often

-They have a lot of back and leg pain because they’re not used to gravity pulling them down

-Can also see in the dark very well due to living at the bottom of the ocean

-Their hair is also very thin and silky, but separated into thick chunks, almost looking like scales from a distance. Furthermore most Mer don’t like having longer hair due to the amount of effort it takes to maintain it, with currents twisting it up and the high chances of it getting stuck between rocks and coral

-Most mer have the habit of picking up whatever’s nearby and eating it raw, due to the fact that their bodies can process it. It’s not uncommon to see a mer picking a crab off the side of their house and plopping it into their mouth.

-They have no problem with eating the fish they are associated with, and they do not consider it cannibalism since they aren’t exactly the same species. (Meaning the Tweels can eat eel and Azul can eat octopus without any problems)

-Baby mer can swim around at a very young age (from just a few days old), and mature faster than most other species in the first few weeks of their lives

-Azul has horizontal, rectangular pupils

-Aside from cecaelia, most mer do have slanted pupils that change shape depending on the danger in the area.

-Mer communicate under the water using clicks and chitters similar to echolocation, and could choose to not learn commonspeak as they don’t interact with humans as much as beastmen

-They are born with teeth and can eat smaller fish from birth (or hatching, depending on the species)

-They’re not mammals, so they don’t have nips I think

-They don’t choose to wear clothing or accessories unless it’s for a formal event or a family heirloom

-Back to the birth thing I think mer eggs are very easy to lose due to the harsh climate of the ocean. Many mer settle for only having a child or two due to how hard it is to raise a child there. Jade and Floyd also hatched from the same egg, meaning they were on the smaller side as babies

-Mer babies also bite to show affection, and will wrap their tail around their guardians when they feel scared or nervous

-Cecaelia babies are well known for sticking to their guardians for the first few weeks of their lives, and are very difficult to pry off due to the strength of their tentacles (And when they do theres little marks left across their backs, stomachs, shoulders, etc from the suction cups) (I’m sorry i cant stop picturing tired momma ashengrotto walking around w little marls on her and baby azul still stuck to her like 👁👁)

-I know this is a little far fetched and is nowhere near mentioned in the game or comic but I have a feeling the tweels have a hard time seeing out of their gray eye? Like coming from the same egg they maybe took some features from the other or they had a difficult development while in there (or maybe I just know nothing abt twins)

-Incredibly territorial, especially towards members of different species.

-Most mer have skin pigmented similar to their tail color as well as thick layers of scales (if their species permits) around their throats, their sides, their arms, and around their ear fins (It throws me off how Azul and the Tweels are the only ones with different skin tones- like you’re telling me you have two teal mer and a black and white mer but the guards at the museum had just blue tails and absolutely no other signs of being a mer??? Give us green Rielle pls and thx)

-Mer grow much larger than humans and beastmen, and don’t stop growing until their twenties.

-They also have markings on their torso, tail, and face that’s similar to others in their families. Normally you can tell which mer is from which family depending on the markings said mer has

-Similar to beastmen tails and ears, mer can be read by their fins. In extreme emotion, mer’s fins will flare out or flatten against their body when they feel threatened.

-They don’t know how to drink things when they get to the surface. I think they’d struggle with the idea since you can’t drink underwater or else the liquid will go everywhere (but then how’d Azul make those potions???)

Fae:

-Also hypersensitive to sunlight, which results in many fae being nocturnal.

-Older fae have been known to go days without any sleep with little to no repercussions. Younger fae have more difficulty with this.

-They have a stronger immunity to magic, and often potions crafted by them are well known to be more potent due to this fact

-Fae speak many languages, with many smaller species talking in little chirps and bell like noises, with bigger species talking in low growls and hissing noises. Fae on opposite sides of this cannot understand each other, but each species of small fae can understand other small fae, and larger ones can understand other large ones, even if there’s a difference in language.

-All of them can practice transformation magic without the use of a spell or potion, regardless of genetic makeup. It’s not uncommon to see large dragons or other reptiles walking the streets of the Valley pf Thorns, nor is it too uncommon to see small “floods” or floating fire balls in more secluded areas of the woods

-Fae grow the largest out of all the groups, but have control over their size due to their transformation magic. They don’t stop growing until they appear the same age as thirty (but is actually a much longer time considering their lifespans)

-Because of this fae take much longer to mature from birth/hatching (I like to think 1 normal year= 80~ years) (So An 80 y/o fae would only be equal to a one year old in any other species)

-Very reserved in their relationships with other fae and especially species. I think the cultural differences between other fae is enough to create a large gap between them, and most fae understand the difference in life span between them and other species, so they actively go out of their way to avoid forming relationships with them. (I feel like this is a part of why Sebek is so abrasive towards humans. I mean, his life span has to be different even if he’s only half, so he might be using his anger to deflect his own feelings about eventually having to lose his human father and Silver, as much as they bicker. Poor guys just in denial and trying to protect himself :(()

Human:

-Humans who grew up around magic users have more resilience to magic and potions (meaning Mc/Yuuken, who grew up in a world without magic at all, is more susceptible and will be effected longer by the side affects of potions and spells, or the spells will pack more of a punch and be potentially more dangerous)(Meaning they could take a sleeping potion meant to give the user a full nights rest and be out for a week straight)

-The chances of a human’s unique magic leaning in one direction depends on the area they live in and what resources they have available (I can’t think of anyone else’s unique magic who does this but Kalim’s oasis maker is a big example. He mentioned they had difficulty getting water on the Land of the Hot Sands so maybe that could have been a factor that altered the makeup of his magic. Like a demand and supply type deal?)

-Magical human’s pupils also change shape when they’re using their magic. I like to think that whenever it’s being used their pupils are blown wide to the point where you can hardly see their actual eye color

-Either that or their eyes glow

-Magic using humans are typically stronger, but have lower endurance than non magic users. This is due to the strain that’s put on their bodies even when magic isn’t in use. There are potions they can use to lessen these effects, and many choose to naturally boost their endurance through various activities, but they have to work harder than non magic using humans

#twisted wonderland headcannons #twisted wonderland #twst #beastman #merman #fae

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lilkermit14 · 3 years

Text

Lavender & Mint

Fem!reader x Pero Tovar

Synposis: In the conventional village of Cullfield lived an unconventional woman who served as an apothecary for the townsfolk. Stubborn and set in her ways, the woman of three tens remains unmarried and childless and plans to continue as such for the rest of her life, much to the horror and confusion of the village. But this unconventional woman has some surprises in store for her when an unconventional man named Pero Tovar rides into town, an event that will change both her and his plans forever—and may flip Cullfield upside down too.

Notes: Idk why I kept mentioning poop complications this chapter but I’m sorry and enjoy. It’s been a while but the CHAPTER is here. Please reblog!!!!

General Warnings: minor injuries, slow-burn, eventual smut, blood, childbirth

For this chapter: Non-sexual references to poop, mention pregnancy, murder, implicit brief reference to infanticide or child abandonment, pre-marital pregnancy and it’s complications in the 1400s, religious “morals”.

Chapter 5: Garlic

Last chapter // Next chapter

“When was the last time you passed bowels, Mister Ashdown?” you inquire, pressing on the old man’s stomach knowing you have found the root cause of his stomach issues. He blinks for a moment thinking as he lays on your observation table, before telling you, “quite some time I’m afraid.”

“I see,” you move your hands away putting your hands on your hips, “well, it seems that you just have a case of constipation––burdensome but not something hard to fix or that will have you laying on your deathbed.”

“You sure?” he asks, almost confused, moving to rise up from the table by himself only for you to come to his assistance. You clarify yourself, “Yes, you have many signs that point to it. It can be caused by a lack of competitive foods in your diet and is more likely with old age.”

“I’m not that old,” He interjects, but you compete, “Yes, but you're old enough for a blockage sir––you’ll be glad to know you’ll live to be truly old as long the burden is treated.”

He huffs now in a sitting position with legs dangling from the table, “so what do you have so i’ll shit.”

You huff at his language, “standard garlic will help move the process along, and I’m suggesting you make sure to eat more greens and berries to clear your system.”

You always assumed that you were let free to discuss any matters with your patients when they were the only ones in the shop, as no one else resided in your residence besides you. But that arrangement had changed and you were not the only one that resided in your home, “If my cock and bowels stop working just have someone put me out of my misery.”

You turn rigid and scandalized to see the face of Pero Tovar standing in your back entrance of the shop—entered unbeknownst to you through quiet steps and a lack of clear view. Mister Ashdown has no qualms defending himself, “I’m only five tens and if my cock doesn’t work how is my wife pregnant?”

You want to scream having to hear this conversation and did certainly not want to be reminded of the conversations you were subjected to by Farrah Ashdown. When the woman at four tens and five found out she was pregnant she spared no expense in telling you how it happened. You opted to rush him along before you could get his account of what he does with his wife, “okay sir here’s your supply get going now.”

“Enjoy the shit,” you hear Pero say and before mister ashdown can respond he is out your door. You turn to Pero fury and rage evident on your face as you are prepared to let the flames of hell loose on him. All he has is a stupid look on his face as he lets out the word, “what?”

“You bastard,” you begin pointing your finger at him moving towards him with menace in your voice towards a man that stands unbothered, “you do not talk to ANY of my clients in such manner especially in my shop.”

“Why is that hermosa? I would be rude to that man outside of your business, what makes your apothecary different?” He queries again with that name, only increasing your anger and distaste for him at the moment. With clenched teeth, you answer him, “I don’t care what you say to Mister Ashdown in town, but my shop is a place of respect––a place where anyone can come for health problems even if they are embarrassing. I want people to know they won’t be judged here because if they feel like they will be, they will come when it’s too late and I can’t do anything for them.”

Pero raises his brow at you, but lets you continue your rant uninterrupted, “When my mother was still alive, a young woman at ten and six came to us complaining of diarrhea, something she was embarrassed to talk about because it was gross and she did not want suitors to find out. Turns out she had sickness from a miasma––we took one look down the town well and discovered a deer had fallen in and died overnight.”

“That was lucky,” he comments, still invested in your story despite the vile nature of talking about excretion. You continue, “Yes, and we may not have caught it so soon if she didn’t come to us. The sickness is fast acting, in hours many more villagers could have been sick, but it was only her––and she lived.”

“Lived?” you smile at his question feeling pride at the healing powers your mom had and hope you live up to, “Yes, the sickness causes dehydration quickly but if you keep the person well hydrated and area clean to prevent reinfection––they will live. This summer she gave birth to her third child at my aid.”

“So their trust is important to you?” you give him a simple nod, glad he is understanding what you were asking of him. You turn to clean up the materials you had brought out to examine Mister Ashdown, not realizing that Pero was not done with questions, “Like how that woman came to you the other day crying in distress?”

You freeze––you had really thought the interest in Mariam had ended when William had first asked you about her the day after asking if she was okay. You nodded and told him it was just feminine needs and didn’t serve much interest in men, something that usually turned men away from asking questions. Well not Pero Tovar I guess, “Why was she crying?”

“It’s a complicated matt––”

“Things of safety are something I have to worry about you know,” He interjects, and you turn your head looking at him to see something serious cross his face, “I have to keep everyone in this village safe––you in particular hermosa––and I want to know if theres something you need to tell me.”

“Part of gaining trust is not telling personal information,” you counter, pulling together to formulate a lie, “It’s nothing of safety she was upset about something––she’s a friend of sorts to me.”

You can tell he doesn’t buy it––he can probably pull the full story together even though you doubt he’s heard a single thing about Mariam’s husband beating her––but he accepts, slouching and learning against a table in thought, “William and I may go for a short hunt––there's not much action in this town I’m afraid and we could use some fresh game.”

You nod, “If you catch any pigeon, I know how to handle it so it's not gamey.”

He huffs, “We're not very good hunters I’m afraid, so you’ll probably only get that or rabbit.”

–––––––––––––––––––

Pero Tovar had useful traits to him––like getting you pigeons––but he was mostly an annoyance. His mere presence always had you on edge, as you waited for something, something from him. It was usually something he said but if not it was his scent or stench rather of pine and something that was him. It was also his sloppy manner, the way he seemed raised with no table manners as he ate all your meals. He spoiled Mite, petting him and feeding him table scraps much to your despair. He was also too loud, his boots filling up the cottage and shop with noise, something that never usually happened.

You lent some time today to make more bread for the household, settling at your dining table and working the necessary ingredients for dough together. Mite lays in the corner, not doing his job as per usual and watching you with some sort of interest in the mannerisms of bread making, but he was likely just hoping for more food in the future. Kneading dough you begin to imagine the dough is Pero kneading your frustration into it. You press and it is his stupid broad shoulders that take up too much space. You pull, it’s the curls on the nape of his neck that are too unruly and untidy. You slam it down, it’s that stupid smile that appears on his face when you have entertained him. God you hate Pero Tovar.

“You may want to stop before you overwork the dough sweetheart,” You stop and see Mildred Becker staring at you with an amused look on her face. You huff Jesus, what does she want, “Sorry for my state, I didn’t hear you enter.”

“Don’t worry I understand too well––I always work out my anger into the dough,” you chuckle a little thinking about how a woman with too many children works out anger the same way as you––you definitely hate Pero Tovar, “I just stopped by because I’ve been meaning to talk to you about something.”

You perk up, “Is Cateline suffering from baby blues again.”

“No, No thank the lord––we’ve been watching over her better this time,” Mildred rounds off, and you remember despite the grievances she gives you, she is a good mother to her children. She was the first to notice that something was wrong with her daughter after the birth and came to you to talk about it. From there Cateline was able to recover and enjoy motherhood, “Something with your house guest Pero Tovar has come to my attention.”

“What did he do,” You ask, prepared to beat Pero Tovar with your broom, but Mildred settles you, “nothing he did, just something someone is doing around him.”

You raise your brow at her beckoning her to continue, “You know Stanislava Rolfe?”

“Of course,” you affirm, surprised she is asking you such a question when you have treated everyone in Cullfield five times over. Mildred continues, “Yes well, She has begun to work at the Inn as a barmaid––she did well with charming Balthasar I guess.”

You were wondering why a poor farmer's daughter’s career path interested you, but you didn’t interject, “I happened to take a quick ale there with my husband, when I noticed something with her and Pero Tovar. You see she appeared extra flirtatious with him––and although barmaids usually are flirty with men in hopes for extra coin, it was more intentional.”

You frown, how could such a beautiful young girl be interested in such a disgusting brute, “Why is she interested in him?”

“Who knows? Many of the girls around Cullfield were excited to see unfamiliar battle-hardened men I supposed,” She ponders for a moment, “all we do know is that she is likely interested in him.”

“I don’t think he is interested in taking a wife,” You contest, brushing aside that Pero would have feelings for the young girl of two tens. Mildred just gives you a hardened stare, “He doesn’t have to be interested in matrimony to want something from her.”

“Was he showing interest back?” you dig trying to figure out the full extent of what you are formulating must be a whirlwind romance. Mildred hums, “no I suppose not, but sometimes men take persistent interest as a way to have a good time.”

You bite your lip remembering that Pero did not fornicate with prostitutes but barmaids, and feel a ball of ache and pain in your stomach at the thought. Mildred instates, “I came to you about this because I want you to try to stop it.”

“Stop it?”

“Yes, make it clear he is to not have such guests,” Mildred explains, and you can tell by her tone and expression you are in for some sort of story, “You know well enough that things go arigh when an unmarried woman gets pregnant, right.”

“Of course,” you remember the chaos that erupted in families when one of their daughters ended up pregnant, and the hasty weddings that came from it. But Mildred had a different story, “although most of the time it gets swept under the rug with a quick marriage and everyone just chooses to ignore it––horrid things can happen when there's not one.”

Mildred sits down at the nearby table, in clear thought of something dark and you go to sit down at a nearby chair, “When I was about ten and eight, and old enough to understand these things, a girl was taken advantage of by a soldier in our village. She was ten and six, and him far older so he should have had the wisdom not to mess with her. What mattered was after it happened, he left with his troop and was never seen in my home village again. She got pregnant, and tried to hide it at first––her mom was dead and she had no older sisters or aunts to go to, so she was afraid to go to her father. When it became too obvious, hate inspired awful things in the leaders of the village, and by the time she gave birth it accumulated.”

Mildred takes a moment to pause, emotions brewing inside her and you feel yourself frozen in place, “she tried to talk to them, pleading, saying he pressured her––persuaded her, but they all pointed and said witch and condemned her son too. She was burn’t at the stake, and her son––well he was never seen again.”

A pause fills the air as you sit in shock, digesting what Mildred has told you, “I’m sorry you had to witness that.”

Mildred huffs, “I’m sorry too, I made sure to get a husband that would get me out of that village and landed a good one on the way––I had seen what that village did to women and children for the sake of moral value and did not intend to stay so my daughters could see too. Adultery is a two person crime that only one party, the feminine one, receives punishment for.”

“So that's why Pero and Stanislava are of such concern to you?” You assume, and Mildred nods, “Although I think Cullfield is of better standing, I don’t desire to find out what they would do if such a case erupted. The girl may be doing this because she intends to capture a man with a better job, but mercenaries rest for a few women and not those of ten and eight.”

“I can understand her intentions I suppose,” you contemplate, believing that she doesn’t hold much true interest in him, but for a better life. Mildred hums, “so is there a chance you can talk to Pero about it?”

“I already established that he is to not bring guests into my home, and I doubt they would find a secluded enough place otherwise,” you reassure, standing up, “I can even remind him today if you would like.”

“That would be good,” Mildred agrees, joining you in standing and allowing you to guide her to the door, “be on the lookout too if you see her come preying––even though he lacks true interest.”

“I will,” you say, and somewhere in your heart you feel prepared to beat Stanislava Rolfe with your broom instead of Pero.

________________

Gardening was no easy task but it was the most necessary task the runner of an apothecary and a household had. Today your tending to crops was more focused on your food supply rather than collecting the necessary ingredients to keep your shop running. You're pleased to see that the last of your harvest grew well, and know that your winter stock will last even with your house guest. You had already pulled out all the carrots, and beets, and had shucked the vines wounding your house of beans and brussel sprouts. You were now left to work at the tough vines of the gourds and squash, planning on leaving the single pumpkin for Pero to handle––who should be on his way home from helping Balthasar with something at his inn.

Standing up with the final gourd in hand––you see something that fills you with immediate displeasure and sickens you to your core. Pero is walking up to your house pursued by Stanislava. You don’t quite know why you feel this angry at him; maybe it’s because you gave him explicit reminders on conduct or maybe––something else. Seeing the near, and well hearing Stanislava, you attempt to think fast to try to get her to leave. Greeting them both in an unnatural kind manner, “Pero, Stanislava, greetings.”

Pero gives you an immediate strange look while his shadow is oblivious and greets you back, “I was just telling Pero this wonderful stor––”

“Oh I must ask how is your rash healing up,” You feel like clapping your hands over your lips the moment the words fly out of your mouth. Stanislava stops in her tracks staring at you blankly, “what?”

“The one I gave you the ointment for––on your groin,” Oh my God what were you doing.

Stanislava turns bright red, “Good thank you––I––I have things to tend to at home, good evening you two.”

Stanislava hurries off, and an amused smile erupts on Pero’s face, “thank you for finally scaring that crow off––she’s been yapping my ear off with nonsense for weeks––I guess you're my scarecrow.”

“Excuse me?” scarecrow, you were going to kill this man. He smiles, a genuine smile, “Yes you scared off my crow––like a scarecrow would. Plus you're covered in leaves right now.”

“Do not call me that”

“Fine mi espantapájaros”

“I swear I’ll smother you in your sleep”

“Is that a true promise for you? Like how you promised not to tell customers private information yet just shouted about the crow’s crotch rash,” at that your body works on it’s own, taking the gourd in your hand and flinging it at Pero’s chest. It was a magnificent shot, and caused the vegetable to break and splatter it’s internal organs onto Pero’s chest and neck. Pero steps back from the impact and looks down on the goop he’s now covered in, “Now, no good espantapájaros does that.”

You press your palm to your face, “Just cut the pumpkin for me and bring it inside, you could use a good bath anyway, your stench is disgusting.”

“I do not smell,” he retorts, and you ignore him, bringing inside your harvest. You really do hate Pero Tovar.

----------------------

Apothecary’s feelings––hate or nah yall?

Garlic is use to treat a lot of ailments in Arab traditional medicine, including heart disease, high blood pressure, arthritis, toothache, infections, and––as seen in this fic––constipation. Listen, I know the constipation part is true because I ate a pesto made with raw garlic and LORD did I shit. Anything else, not quite sure but hey worth a shot if you are desperate.

It is also seen as an immune booster for colds and coughs––in fact if you are congested from a cold putting a clove of garlic in each nostril can clear that shit OUT.

Garlic is also believed to help asthma symptoms. IDK if it actually is true but that’d be iconic because my mom loves garlic and she has asthma.

Garlic is my favorite seasoning. I put it in my soup. I put it in my eggs. I put it in my ramen. I put it in my burgers. I put it in my cooch––

taglist:

@poenariuniverse @harleyamidala @yespolkadotkitty @storiesofthefandomlovers @babybelou @legally-a-bastard @computeringturtle @clydesducktape @sixties-loser @buckysalefty @april-14-blog @prettylittlegoldfish @softpedropascal @maybege

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pndnj · 3 years

Text

Cathartic- Yellow Metal Lyrics

Heres where I am with the lyrics, I referenced @25Goldenn on twitter for some of it that I couldn’t comprehend.

*music*

0:23

Dark matter, like painted splatters, they fit better, the old saying, the way it goes, better the devil you do then you don’t know. I hit pedals and switch levers, my heart metal, I can't settle, im part trouble, they are not subtle. I fuck good so fuck cuddles, burst bubbles the thrist levels at new heights, i down doubles, and got baked til I felt high, my face puzzled, felt muddled, far strung and your floors woodent, the thought might but the fit wouldn’t. A fortnight

0:46 - 1:00

And I thought right, it’s all bark and no bite, I’m Tony Stark still embarking on a dream, took a bit of time to take darkness from the team. Seen what I saw. Heartless on the sleeve. Tried to burn my wings, so I put them in a piece on my chest , at peace no rest.

1:00-1:15

Flipped this on it’s head. Rip the script up now, flip it don’t pretend, slipping shit again, Fakers all around me, I’ve been living in pretense. Fake friends won’t make amends. There’s no need, these mean comments control the scenes. Attentionseekers, the spine is weakened

1:15-1:24

This family needs, what a family needs, and the planet bleeds, the damaged trees. It’s never leaving til we ascend so fuck the fence, and until they stop killing colour it’s fuck the feds.

1:22 - 1:44

You must be off it, I mean it, you know you ain’t never get with the judging and I used to dread growing my beard too long, never felt I belonged, but it's really long like a minute I ain’t looking to no mans for the limits, They’re feeling timid, I’m telling them who they mimic, why they don't look like a clinic …. Why they don't get no women, Still, we’re just fucking girls, Lost in the wrong world, Jurassic, now to this vermin

1:41- 1: 50

Kicking the game I’m serving, these losers are never learning, my fire is forever burning, adding it to my fuel, seems like I’m always focused on never becoming you, These locals that rob us feeling … was for a reason.

1:52-2:02

I’m seeing my new beginnings, watch out this loser’s winning, and no water is too deep to swim in Like I’m about to see a killing, I’m all the way that and living, flawless and feeling lawless, the prison now to the gimmicks, my vision is set to something,

2:03-:2:20

I’m watching you bitches plummet, no matches here for my cunning, you rappers are feeling done in, switching your genre, running and Running your jaw, stunting, pulling at straws, something I think you’re a poor effort, deaf and tone deaf and I ain’t treat you separate. Living, I’m in my element, riding it like a … never lose me to fentanyl, scared when I take a benadryl. Keeping it green in general

2:20- 2:46

Think that you remain irrelevant. Look at yourself with reverence, hoping to always elevate. Celibate of these thoughts, killing themselves with sedatives. In comparison to eminem, you’re feeling feminine. Impolitically correct, still dropping on my dick. And I never gave a fuck about what they say abt my shit, I’ve been moving things in my mind like it’s this mountain dew Memories have made me wonder if one day I’m after you. What’s the purpose that you do, is what you're hoping that they learn, i’d like to say i’m done but it’s getting up on my nerves

2:46 -2:55

I’m looking at my life, saying what do I deserve. It’s hard to say I know when I’m walking through the dirt. Talking while you’re nothing I can see for what it’s worth. I’m tired of feeling hurt and I’ve tried enough but nothing works.

2:55-3:40

I’m racking up excuses while I’m slacking off on work. Chit chatting is the usual, talking to this clerk, i beg you don’t include me. I might write it on my shirt so everytime they see me, the oldest know to swerve. SWERVE Life is potent, bits of fucked shit… till they took notice weren’t no hocus pocus, it was hard work that got me heard so i put in the graph like google maps but the whole earth

… around my door mat, taking over like the drones, rolling dirt up in miles like the water, and exploding like Annas hematoma. Don't need to see a slammer to know that I don't want to go man

I’m a showman. I’m just focused on the drama… like i’ve got my own insurance, show myself the pain, like i boxed it in the frame, if we’re about to talk greatness im great, the way you have to say my name like beyonce

“Say my name”

4:00-4:46

Just a bum with a cigarette, sun coming up, all my thoughts on the internet. Feeling deep, I’m just bored with the silhouette single sec, get fucked up for the thrill of it . killer streak playing Pacman. Like I came from the Philippines vanilla bean still a thing for the thrill of scene,

Theres a beam, UFO, Leave it well alone I aint moving, stood still on the peloton, telephone and its always on the dial tone, it's been a while since i’ve smiled at a milestone, seen a big pile in my mind stone, me against the world on my Jack Jones, Like I’m John Jones, With pictures in the condo, far from John Doe, in the ___, like I'm Johnny Bravo, got pravado, with a small dick sitting in golados, feeling far gone, cuz that last hit was the good shit, was that stay lit

4:48-5:02

You can never take my shit come and get me. On the top floor, cloud 9, fading, never bailing, felt amazing, inhaling, til my lungs two guns blazing. Overcome all the stunts that I pulled. A suit of just skin and then wool

5:02- 5:17

This life doesn’t give you no armour, a lot of myself can harm ya. I swear on what’s good, that I’m here till they take me. I pray that I’m wrinkled, at least over 80, and start moving like a ruler, ?damaged? Like a computer going fast, bars from the jeweler, bring the songs to the beach in hopes of finding tuna

5:18-5:36

…

5:36- 6:16

Grab a bat, lose my rag. Couple things got me mad, a couple people got me wrong and now I’m changing up the swag. Coming in and stealing it, I might take the whole bag. Feeling undefeated, I’m a beast with a reason, and imma lead the whole pack. Fearless like I’m Caesar, I’m just waiting for a chance to fill it up with diesel, and all I've been achieving is clocking miles in its region, moving like a legion.

Promise that I made to myself an allegiance. Do you still believe I’m a fool for ever leaving, staring at the ceiling, can never put a cap on achieving. I’m just here for the rap, then I’m leaving.

I’ve had about enough of being my own enemy, it’s time I grew up, a long way from 17. Always went against the grain, struggles in my life. Got some things to say when I stand up on a mike.

6:16-6:32

I ain’t dropping this for fame, I need this time, like therapy, it’s just to keep me sane. The truth is on my medicine, can’t put that on your plate.

Speeding into everything, bout time I fixed the brakes. Don’t say I can’t communicate , you know I conversate with you in several different ways. And I know you know it’s references, looking at your face.

6:33- 6:53

Can’t justify mistakes, like every man that made them, seems I ain't the one to blame. Lying to myself, only had so much to gain, so now I’m switching up the plate, see if that affects the place, im at on most days

I ain’t going with the usual so they looking at me strange. Confused, I can feel it all, I’m here to make a change. It’s cold at 3am outside, I’m walking with the dog, thanking god that you don’t talk at all, my mind is switching off

6:54-7:12

Driving down to find myself, cuz I’ve been getting lost, lived this selfless life and found I can give a toss. Lessons that I’ve learned I’ve tried teaching to myself. What I’ve learnt from certain people is that they’re better than myself.

So I surround myself with real ones, and you feel the plastic melt. Like burning toy soldiers that used to go up on the shelf. Recycle the ideas, conveying on the belt

7:14-7:29

.. circus, always hurting the way we felt? Embarrassed that we dreamt of bigger things and letting go of notions till we feel them in cement

Tired of only hoping, we feel broken men. Cuz the gravity is weight and has kept us to the ground, see the only people speaking with favors in their mouths

7:46-7:58

Got killer rhymes… no fillers, like godzilla, eating clouds cuz my smokes thicker, throat licker, my dope sicker, bringing people their hope like im the pope slicker, i hope you’re getting the point cuz i walk quicker

I thought my city was shit bcs I want bigger like my zipper couldn’t zip up fed up with the…my love is fickle.. Residual age has a primitive face

I see demise for your limited ways, Left it to simmer, simmer away…a fake glimmer in the haze

8:09-8:11

Feeling trapped this industry is a cage

8:34-8:50

Nobody’s speaking the truth, I’m offended by the State. Look at the state of the news, I’ve decided the argument, reciting my views, while they’ve been sat in their chairs, I’m feeling pressure to choose.

Standing here as one man, how can I do half when you’re half the person I am. If it wasn’t in your life, you didn’t choose it. It’s the funny thing about music. It’s the pain and beauty of it.

8:52-9:11

Don’t give a fuck what my suit is, it looks good so I wear it, better than the shoot that People’s wearing, changing the whole narrative for these basics and scarcity

Been facing the racists from back when i were a kiddie .born up in in 93’. been living in Bradford City..kicked me out of the schools, they had a problem with me hitting the kids that would call me p*** still sitting in the classroom chilling, and i'm angry now that I’m older I see they treat us different

9:12-9:25

got me thinking I’m the problem cuz they never dealt with those issues.

20 years later I’m still in the same boat, tryna treat me like my grandpa, say I came up off the boat. Came to tell you what I stand for, man I think you’re shit, a joke. How can I be civil, when they got me by the throat

9:25-9:35

Pushing my feelings down, you ain’t got it like them

‘Boy your skin is so light’, ok motherfucker take my name up on a flight. Try to convince immigration that your bloodline’s half white.

9:35-9:45

I don’t know how that’s acceptable, when life is more susceptible to perception, be the death of them. I’ve been looking at the sky saying where’s that day of reckoning, you had your prophets right when they say that you would speak to them.

9:45-9:55

I need justice in this life and I trust that it’s my fight, cuz when I’m writing it feels right to have them focused on the facts again. Focused on the rap again, hoping for the change, gunna put this on the map again

9:55-10:16

Writing in all caps again, the pain, it goes through me so I write the letter. All the shit that could have brought me but made me better.

I’m at home with a pain in my soul , yeh rap… cuz you know I was too real to contest it, my time was invested. Now I look at the industry, I see it infested, looking like kids who would write on nesquik.

10:17-10:29

My name ain’t on the list unless they label it ethnic.

I ain’t never gave a fuck about these jokers and jesters. Ain’t no answers for these things, so just save us the questions, man allowed of violence, cuz my silence is deafening, your opinion stinks, somebody get him a breath mint.

10:30- 10:42

Start to understand why they think that I’m threatening, I move in certain ways, couldn’t slow me with ketamine Now they all wanna hear me, got a table at letterman. Direction changed, like I changed up the lettering. Don’t believe the age ,bcs I move like a veteran.

10:42 - 10:47

Raised on the benefit for whose benefit, they’ll never learn shit, man, if the shoe fits.

…no words coming out when you open your mouth

And to be honest, it’s insulting, offensive to my wounds that have been salting. Tryna ask me questions that they know I never answer. I’d rather sit online and reply to the fan art

11:00-11:06

Fuck a sports car, coming through when i rapped

tell you what I like, farm life and the tractor

11:06- 11:17

Fake life, 'sup online, suck a fat one. You don’t wanna buy into that, none of that son. Sitting in the garden 98’ in the Datsun, seen some hot summers but I still remember that sun.

*music*

11:51- 12:34

I make millions off of my pain, cause I know a few millions still living that way

Dealing with the hurt, they should know cause they don’t deserve it, it hit deep cause i hit the nerve. Only way that the sheep learn if the street firm, in my ways I don’t wanna change, everything just stay the same

Who you tryna convince you understand, cant maintain, let the lights dim some, get the Chow Mein, flex, get the tape, right up at night

Why these men be nice to my face, be nice, i ain’t tryna be a gangsta ruins my vibe

Rather be low-key and on my phone. Never need the trophy or the show piece

Never show peace in a North Face fleece. Show kids this like i wrote my flip

Cause the sign might fit till the start i’m sick

12:37-13:05

Now you see where I come from, the world don’t. Only achievement in this life is the Jordans. Committing petty crimes out of boredom, we can’t afford them. So I stole it, need a rolex

Go make sense, get yourself a job, It’s a poor man’s game tryna sit and pray to god, he ain’t sorting out your problems, gotta sort them out yourself

Used to tell us fables, now I’m writing them myself, Cause we raw like animals we all just need some help

Cathartic, I’m an artist, trying to put my heart in

Felt double crossed like Leo in Departed

13:05- 13:27

For the knowledge i’m not charging see I got it all free

But my hunger kept me starving like i’m feening for the feed

I just Need a reason to see me bleeding for my creed. Trick you with the words like I keep em up my sleeve. Picking where I fit, I see me sitting with the queen

I ain’t doing it unless you’re used to saying please

Let me flow a bit, before I sting 'em with the bees, They tryna kill us with disease

(Music)

13:34- 14:12

Why does it feel like they had the same notebook and the same four looks

Like the rain won't touch on their face, so sus when they lie don’t trust not a minor

Please no fuss, I just move through the game like must

Something in the way i adjust till i stick, Free falling like the ship, free fall till i bust

Remember 21 brother gave no fucks. Trying to project when they give them looks

In the projects, in the objects us

In my own way, never gave me love, shoulda never started this, broken hearted kid

Dried up the feeling till I stole the lid

Don’t wanna relish in the fame but I can’t resist

14:46-14:58

I like the way we feel, I like the way, I like the way

Ain’t no mistake, i am a being

I ain’t tryna be a leader, been selling out since Jesus

All my rhymes are for the readers, between the lines, like Father time, I fuck Mother Nature

14:58-15:40

That’s what they get, the connotations. Tell 'em I lived a life, and then I lived a life of adjacent? like its…. and played it patient.

Alone on my own spaceship, always tryna find greatness, still defying lines, but I’m fighting in my prime.

Shining light like Kylo while imma kill it all the time. Aging like I’m wine

Asian in my face, but still my race you can’t define. Focused on defiance, imma fight it while it’s life.

Started something sick and on my mind is what’s next, just became a dad so now I’m taking all the cheques. Better know I’m staying and paying like it’s debt. Imma get it done, if it’s taking all my breath, sweat, and down I ain’t messing around til I’m the best

Speaking in full sentences, shoulda thought about a strategy before you went at the stratosphere about this… rings around Saturn, this ain’t a battle, I’m sat, I’m here

15:40-16:22

Catch me doing magic, hired and sounding tragic I think you could use practice and until that you get the blacklist and pull like a … actress? Fooling them like a catfish, schooling like a legend, happy to be the reference, fusing like iridescence, leaving them all guessing, leaking out of my brain like a pipe I aint fixing, shining like a star you can see it from a distance

Aint many of me around p*** I’m just different Certain stages to this level aint here because fame is to the devil fuck a label, imma do this from the ghetto, clean up like Im Dettol

I’m the man to put a bet on, sight smart like a weapon, this is my kind of setting, i write the world I’m sat in, while these others live on hype, i see them fight in how they type, the fruit is ripe for the taking, i think i might

16:22-16:57

Let me take you away from here, Let me take you away from here, Let me take you away from here

16:58- 17:47

Eccentric things are mentioned like a kid stuck in detention tryna escape im just spitting what is written on the next page, spitting image of my dad in his young days

Born sinner when i’m livid i say fucks sake

Don’t worry i’m too cunning with no plumbing, the waterworks, i sung something that resonates, i thought it first like giving birth to the parrot perch

They see me do it and they know it works

Don’t know what’s worse: the way that you live your life or the way that you write a verse

You’ll be nervous, you don’t deserve it we’ll scratch the surface ill leave a crater, lift the dirt up to find the hurting

Can’t know for certain nothing is guaranteed, tryna be a better person than the world deserves to see cuz i see a lot of sharks still swimming in the sea

Cease and arrest what’s the reason.. And these the kinda kids we bringing up next

Distorted reality, all they needed was family, too hard to face, to see what the damage is

17:47

*i don’t wanna be, i don’t wanna be, a part of this, no, i don’t wanna be, i don’t wanna be, a part of this, *

18:04-18:38

Sometimes they ask the questions too deep to form a sentence, to disform, is this the norm, is this the sentence i feel defenseless i played the setlist, and all my sweat blood and tears, forgot to mention feeling lost, going off into different sections i feel like love wrecked it

If it’s not a drug why am i waiting for the next fix, affected, i cant believe that you left this

I guess I leave for the best wish, moving on like im fine for the lectures

We see it all from spectrums, cuz if we’re falling down we can fall down together

Staircase to heaven, mirror down the middle like 11, resentment on one side it won’t settle

18:38- 19:14

Mind fried but taking sense, they aint got a sense of themselves in the rich ends

Need to spell it out for them.. Made for them so witness

I know you feel afflicted but you always love it with me while im laughing at you, ya think you’re laughing with me

I try to (i love you) but im grown so they don’t fit me, my body thrown from the new to this old city so Im sick of sitting on my own, feeling so shitty, i’ve been on roads where its cold and the snow hitting

Its okay to be yourself, sit and talking to myself

I’ve been walking for the longest, just need a little rest, know i ain’t the strongest, I can feel it in my chest, talking about my feelings and of me, they get the best

19:14-19:59

They aint leaving, seeing breathing in my breath

Till death do us part is just seeded in my heart, like a work of art

Never winning,im just scared

Cant begin from the start, do i play a part in the rhythm of the night

I guess i’m onto something cuz the dark is feeling right

Every cloud got a lining, put my own miles in, like moralis, figured that they’re jealous, that they could just never tell us to change because the weather never made me question whether or not i’m not that level

Got rid of all the bullshit sitting in my way, most of them are full of shit i see it every day

I do hearing the same things that i do, maybe that shits hitting like haiku

How much do you pay for them to hype you

Recycle your flaws but they aint like new, leaving and conceded and full of diesel like engines that need a cleaning, the ending will be revealing. Even though we ain’t raising the facts, now we been facing.

20:01-20:52

The cactus with spikes, needing spaces. Different faces, the same story. A full body like straight body direct to your system.

Could never tell 'em we missed’ em. Not even with the thoughts, we gift them. Cuz they just take advantage, guess we are caught in a system.

My soul pouring out details of borrowed time, had enough of a fill, this is for sorrow time. I’m seeing visions of Heaven, I seen the severed line, between the gospel they speak and when theyre telling lies.

Remember telling a friend of mine, you’d sent of mine, identified like a 3rd eye. Got a habit of knowing now where the dirt lies. So benign. I ain’t sober after 9, so I fuck their minds. Why you flipping out, see another

Try to rep it from the city, fuck a chiller crew, repping for the nittys, trying to keep us down, raised on the social, don’t want to let us out of the system. Me, I insist we assist them, me alone putting shifts til I lift them

20:53-21:12

I know it’s hard, that’s why I like it, I’m fit to fight it, I’m from the North, I’m backing Tyson, it’s been decided, don’t see no light. They needing guiding, just redefining, realizing, I’m realigning, in full finance, they stay silenced.

Can’t be louder, I’m juiced up with no powder. I fix shit like a slick spanner. Gone green like Bruce Banner. So free Gaza on my banner

21:12-21:51

The real McCoy, I ain’t nothing to toy with, signifying peace like a Japanese Koi Fish. How did this happen, we’re moving backwards in our timeline, killing us with cyanide, Right up for the freedom 'til we transform like Ironhide

This is bout my feelings, the way that I move affects the fate that I’m sealing. Can’t say nothing, with that something being on the page, kept inside the pen like the bars that have been kept caged. See I always had a plan, since I was young, we had nothing man

Now it’s been a few years since I ain’t seen the fam, on foreign lands. Bout to climb Everest in the avalanche. Right into the riddles as soon as you were born. Never asking the question cuz it’s the norm. See I’m in a questionin’ session

21:52-22:03

Like the manner got a method to teaching a lesson, listen to MF Doom, he taught me like Ra’s Al Ghul. Felt like living in Gotham, the people were rotten. Still we play cartoons so it’s never forgotten.

22:03-22:15

Chilling at the top but we came from the bottom. Writing and jottin for them life by, spotting the difference

*Dreams, was growing out of me, sun promising that tomorrow it will rise, time playing games with my mind, I swear it will pass us by

Train goes on the tracks, smoke, I’m tired to hide my thoughts, so blinded in flames, Don’t know where we’re going, I have no way of knowing, only see what’s in my head

Can’t we wait a minute, so we can savour this, It’s on my brain again, these days, It on my brain again these days”

23:10-23:46

They’re hating on Palestine ways, The oh no Palace playing Prince on the Steinway, Sending out mind waves, stop them like crimewaves, Freedom fighter, Yellow Metal is my name

Like vipers, I see the sly ones, the snake that’s called Biden, none of them abiding what they might put in writing

We should be used to it by now, say whatever for the vote and then just choose another route, say they’d never kill another unless that brother’s skin is brown

I’m just telling you the facts, if you can’t take it, the truth naked, to bare bones and my thoughts lately, spitting politics.. Done ain’t it, Shit just gets me vexed, and now I’m sitting that I think of it

23:45-23:59

Feeling on the brink of it, whatever it is, Figure out some shit at least it feels that way

talk about my feelings and I don’t feel so strange, finding solace, that’s a promise, in Metropolis but being honest, can’t write a sonnet, without some pain

24:00-24:40

Can’t fade away, away so we can savour this, been on my brain again these days

Can't find a way to be so you can savour this, been on my brain these days

Singing the song for another, singing a song for another

#zayn #yellowmetal #cathartic #feel free to correct me pls #cathartic lyrics

115 notes · View notes

honeyhan-123 · 3 years

Text

The Monster In Plain Sight ~ III

Series Summary: Steve’s been slowly biding his time, playing the role of the perfect Captain America, but now he’s sick of playing and he’s going to take what he wants.

Chapter Summary: Steve peels back his mask.

Warnings:Dark!Steve, non-con, allusions to past victims, Steve is a serial rapist in this, trapping the reader. I’m sorry if theres more but I’m half dead right now so just let me know and I’ll fix it.

Word Count: 3.2k

AN: This is my contribution to trying to make 2021 better than the shit show that was 2020. I really hope y’all like it!

Also, I’m thinking that maybe this is the last part? Let me know if you want more but I’m not too sure.

Series Masterlist

My Masterlist

The ‘safe house’ that Steve had chosen was really just his own little cabin in the woods. Of course it wasn’t just like any regular cabin, there were safety measures in place. Like the fact that it was at least five miles away from the nearest residence, or the fact that to get in or out of the building his thumbprint was needed. But you didn’t need to know any of that.

It was a three hour drive and Steve couldn’t help but peak over at you out of the corner of his eyes for the entire duration. You wore jeans and a sweater that Steve longed to rip from your body. Once he had you safely tucked away in his cabin he’d make sure you could never hide your body again.

The thoughts alone of what he had planned made him shift uncomfortably in his seat, trying to readjust himself in his pants. Oh how he longed to just pull over to the side of the road and slide into his new home between your legs. It physically pained him but he still had at least an hour drive to go and he didn’t want to risk you drawing any attention during that time.

It took longer than Steve wanted to reach his cabin but at long last he finally turned onto the dirt road that made up the last two or so miles to the house. He watched out of the corner of his eyes as you stared out at the dense forest, a hint of nervousness starting to screen in. In a sick way Steve was glad that you were finally starting to realise how vulnerable you were now.

It had been almost too easy for Steve to convince you to trust him and he couldn’t wait to shatter that trust. To show you the monster that had been lurking in plain sight.

When he finally eased the car to a complete stop, he allowed himself one last glance back at you. It wouldn’t be the last time he would be seeing you but it would be the last time you would look at him with that level of trust in your eyes. At least, for a while.

Steve had no doubt that if he kept you here for long enough, you would eventually cave to him. Although, none of the others had lasted long enough for that…

It was rare for anyone to catch his eye for long enough for Steve to bring them here. And the few that had, quickly learnt that Steve was not the epitome of patience that the media often portrayed him as.

Steve shrugged those memories away. They were the past and he was here with you now. He was certain you wouldn’t disappoint him like the others had. You wouldn’t end up like they had.

He gave you one last smile before opening his door. The cool autumn air hinted at the fast approaching winter and he saw you shiver as he carried your bags up to the front door.

‘This is home sweet home. There are various safety measures around the place but you don’t really need to worry about all that. All I want you to concern yourself with is settling in. I want you to like it here as much as I do. After all, it is your new home.’ His words sent a wave of confusion through you.

‘For the next few weeks at least.’ You corrected him with a smile as you gazed around the mud room, completely missing the flash of anger that momentarily took a hold of Steve's features.

‘Right. Well, it could take some time to catch whoever fucked you.’ You gasped at his vulgar language, turning to face him.

‘That’s not the word I would have used.’

Steve merely shrugged away your chastisement and gestured to the hallway. ‘Let me show you to the bedroom. You followed as he led the way past the dining room and then the kitchen. Just by the door to the kitchen you saw another, one that held a flight of dark stairs, presumably to a basement of sorts. You were glad to not be sleeping down there.

When Steve nudged the bedroom door open you were surprised by how lived in the room looked. You would have thought a safe house would have a sort of desolate feel to it, but not this one. It almost had a sort of homey feel to it.

You expected Steve to just dump your bags down on the bed and then disappear off to wherever he would be sleeping but instead, he closed the door behind him and you heard a faint click of a lock. You whipped around to face him, about to ask why he’d locked the door but the words died in your throat as you caught sight of his darkened eyes.

‘Steve…’ Your voice was timid, taken aback by the abrupt change in him and all too aware of just how alone you were now. ‘What are you doing?’

‘What I’ve been waiting to do for months.’ His voice was deeper than usual and your throat felt tight as he shrugged out of his jacket. It was only when he turned to hang it up in the closet did you realise why the cabin had such a homey feel to it. It had that feeling because it was a home. His home.

‘I- I don’t understand. What do you mean “what you’ve wanted to do for months?”’

‘I mean I’ve been watching you. Waiting for this moment. Patiently biding my time until I had you completely at my mercy.’ He started closing the distance between your bodies and with every step he took, you took one backwards. ‘You know, it’s kind of funny. I knew from the first moment I saw you that I would have you, but I didn’t realise until last night that I wouldn’t be satisfied with just a one off occurrence. You’re better than that, you deserve more.’

The back of your legs hit the foot of the bed and you stumbled back onto it, trying to crawl away as the realisation sunk into you. ‘Last night? That - that was you?’ Your voice was merely a whisper but in the silence of the cabin there was no doubt he heard you.

‘Of course it was me. Why else do you think I made sure I was the first one to find you this morning? Getting you here would’ve been a little harder if you had gotten the authorities involved.’

‘You had no intention of ever helping me. Then why…’

‘Make you get the sperm for a DNA test?’ He finished your question for you, a twisted smirk on his lips. ‘That, I admit, was purely for my own entertainment. Plus I wanted to see your perfect little cunt again.’

‘So what? You just took me here for… for what?’ Panic was truly starting to set in as he revealed what a monster he really was.

‘Isn’t it obvious? I want you. I wasn’t content with just one night. I want more. So I brought you here, miles away from the nearest residential area. You can scream as loud as you like but no one will ever hear you. You can try to escape me but I will catch up before you even make it off the property. You’re mine to do with a I please now.’

His words sent a shiver down your spine and you didn’t doubt that he meant every single one of them, yet there was a part of you that refused to give up hope. This had to all be a dream. Some sick, twisted nightmare.

You hadn't seen him move but suddenly you were pushed onto your back and his arms were on either side of you, caging you in. ‘So go ahead.’ His lips brushed your own as he breathed the words. ‘Do it. Scream for me.’

His words were your only warning before his hands met the straps of your tank top and abruptly tore it away from your body. Your arms came up, trying to shield yourself from him but he swiftly gathered your wrists in his hand and pinned them above your head.

You thrashed your hips wildly, trying to buck him off of you to no avail. Instead, he slipped his spare forefinger down along your sternum and hooked it underneath your bra. With one last devious smirk down at you, he pulled it away.

It hurt as it tore around your chest, leaving you completely bare to him. ‘That’s much better isn’t it?’ His eyes danced along your breasts as he spoke, completely enraptured by them for the time being.

You thrashed even more wildly, your desperation kicking up a notch as his hand slipped along your stomach and down to the waistband of your pants. He deftly undid the button to your jeans and then the fly. He used your own movement to aid him in pulling the denim and your modest panties down and away from your legs.

You breathed in his own breath as his fingers forced their way between your thighs. ‘Well… Look at this.’ He pulled his hand back so you could see the glistening fingers. ‘I knew you were different. You want it. You want me.’ You tried to speak, to deny his claims but he interrupted before you even had the chance. ‘Don’t bother with whatever falsity you’re trying to say. Those gorgeous lips can lie to me but your body can’t.’ With that he shoved his hand back between your thighs and started playing with the slick he had found there.

You wanted to hate it, and you did to an extent. Yet, there was a small part of you that couldn’t ignore the growing fire that his fingers had ignited. ‘Stop it please. Steve. Stop.’ Your commands were pitiful even to your own ears.

‘You and I both know you don’t mean that Baby.’ You shuddered at the pet name yet your denial was caught in your throat as his fingers found your clit. An involuntary gasp fell from your lips and it was all the invitation that Steve needed to lean down and slide his tongue into your open mouth.

You recoiled at the unfamiliar feeling but no matter how hard though tried to shove him off, he was too strong. He remained stuck, on top of you, the only barrier was his arm leading down to your cunt where he continued to draw out moan after moan from your lips.

‘That’s it Baby. Just give in to me. Isn’t it so much easier? To just give in to what your body so desperately needs?’ His words were mumbled against your lips and you tried to speak out, only for another moan to betray your mind.

His hand had shifted slightly, and suddenly there was a finger poking at your entrance as his palm continued to brush against your bundle of nerves. You were unable to do anything but lie there and take it as his finger easily slid into your channel.

No sooner than he had one finger inside you did he add a second and then a third. ‘God, you’re so fuckin’ wet. So tight. I can’t wait to see you take my cock again.’ His words should have repulsed you but instead they furthered your own excitement. Your thighs clenching desperately around his hand. ‘Oh you like that do you? Me talking dirty? Reminding you that your best feature will always be right here?’ His hand drew back and lightly slapped your swollen lips. ‘This hole. This cunt. It’s fucking marvellous.’ Your eyes squeezed shut on their own accord as his fingers brushed against that spot inside you.

You were repulsed by your body's reaction. The coil inside your gut grew tighter and tighter with every ministration of his. You longed for him to get off of you yet you also longed for him. Your body and mind were at war with one another but not for long. Your body claimed a swift victory.as your orgasm approached and continued to wash over you, from the tips of your toes to your muddled mind.

Wave after wave of pleasure consumed you, making its way over your body as your walls pulsed around his fingers.

‘That’s a good girl. Just give in. I can give you this and so much more.’ You were in such a daze as he spoke that you didn’t even realise his body briefly leaving yours as he hastily shoved his hands down his thighs and his shirt falling to the floor nearby. Just as quickly as his body had left yours, it returned.

He apparently didn’t think you needed restraining anymore and you hated how his assumption was correct. You were in no state to fight back anymore and you questioned if you even wanted to. You felt his hand lightly brush against your sensitive lips before there was a poking sensation. You gasped as he pushed his way into you. Your groin was already sore from the night before and now you truly knew why. You didn’t have to be able to fully see him to know Steve was just as big down there as he was everywhere else.

It felt as though he were splitting you open and you tried to shove him off once more, unable to bear with the pain. Your attempts were futile as your hands were merely met with a wall of smooth muscle. ‘I know baby. I know it hurts but - fuck. I’ll make it feel better. I’ll make it all feel better.’ You took little reassurance from his words as he began thrusting, slowly pulling out inch by inch before forcing his way back in.

His slow pace was torturous. Despite the pain, your body wanted more and it wanted it now. On their own accord, hips slightly lifted up to meet his, trying to invite him further in and Steve needed no further prompting. His pace shifted drastically, his hips now pummelling into yours over and over again. ‘I knew you wanted it. I knew you wanted me. You put up a good fight but now that you have a cock. In you, you’re just a mindless little fuck doll aren’t you?’ When you couldn’t respond his hand lightly slapped your cheek, gripping it tightly. ‘Aren’t you?’

You gasped out a meaner ‘yes’. And watched as his smile grew.

‘And whose fuck doll are you?’ His words alone were menacing enough and you needed no further prompting to answer him this time.

‘Yours. Steve… I’m yours.’ The words were out of your lips before you had truly had the chance to process what you were saying.

‘That’;s right Baby. You’re all mine.’ His thrusts paused only briefly as he placed his feet back on the ground and pulled your ass towards the edge of the bed, wrapping your legs around his waist. His hands gripped your thighs harshly, no doubt leaving a myriad of bruises in their wake. He used his new position to push even further in than you thought possible. How could he reach this far inside you? His gaze was directed down at where your bodies met with the sound of clapping flesh.

‘See that Baby? See how well your body takes me? How deep I am inside you, basically in your womb?’ His words terrified you but there was a part of you that longed for me. ‘See this right here?’ His finger tapped your abdomen and you could see what he meant as he moved. Even through all the layers of fat, muscle and skin you could still see the bulbous head of his cock as he speared into you. ‘You were made for this. For me.’

You shredded as he hand moved down from your stomach and back to your clit. You didn’t want to want his fingers or any part of him for that matter, yet your body continued to betray you, a mewl falling from your lips as he flicked your clit.

The coil which you had been denying grew tighter and tighter with every thrust of his hips. You could tell Steve had realised how closer you were as you felt him pull back, his pace slowing ever so slightly. He had drawn you tantalisingly close to the edge and yet refused to push you over. You hated the way your eyes met his, large and doe like, silently begging for more.

‘You’re gonna have to do better than that if you want to cum Baby. I wanna hear you beg for me. For my cock.’ You shook your head back and forth, determined not to cave. All this earned you was a humourless laugh. ‘Let me make this real simple for you Baby. You can either beg for me like a good girl or I can simply stop giving a fuck about your pleasure.’ As though to emphasise his words he let his fingers cease their dance along your clit, causing a whimper to fall from your lips. ‘It’s really up to you. But dildo make your mind up quickly, I’m not feeling very patient.’

Five thrusts. That was all it took for your resolve to crumble and for the words to start tumbling from your lips. ‘Please. Please Steve. Let me cum. I need it.’

‘Oh Baby, you and I both know you can do better.’ His words mocked you as his slow pace drove you crazy.

You swallowed down your pride as you prepared to say your next words. ‘I need you Steve. You’re-’ You were cut off by the sudden fierceness of his thrusts, once again bringing you back to the edge. There was a warning look in his eye as he gazed down at you to keep going with your begging however. ‘You’re the only one. The only one who can give me what I want. What I need.’ Your words which he had clearly so longed to hear sent him over the edge as he collapsed on top of you, grinding his hips against you as he pumped you full of his cum. You hated how the feeling of him coating your walls was what did you in, triggering your own desperate release. Your walls clenched around him, pulsing as your body tried to lock him into place.

The time it took for Steve to recover truly said a great deal about how much he had wanted this. How own breaths were laboured as he lay unmoving on top of you, his forehead pressed against your own, forcing you to breathe in his air.

‘God Baby,. That was even better than last night. So much better. I think I… I need a little break before round two. Maybe next time you could do all the work and ride me like how you ride that little dildo of yours hmmm?’ His words were hazy but the force with which he lifted you up from the edge of the bed and moved so that he lay with his head against the pillow, his cock not once slipping out of you was astonishing. His arms locked around your waist, holding you in place as he yawned. ‘Maybe you could wake me up after my little nap like that? I don’t think there's any better way to be woken up.’

His azure eyes closed and you dreaded the next time you would see them once more.

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#steve rogers #dark!steve rogers #steve rogers x reader #marvel #mcu #dark!verse #non con

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alanshee-keeper-of-realms · 3 years

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Reunited a S15 fic

I just wrote this as kind of coping after the events of Season 15 I just went what if she never came back and Jay as an old man went back to the oceans edge to talk to her.

Words: 722

Jay slowly moved to the waters edge, hair long gone white due to age face lined with years of pure life, he pushed his glasses up staring out at the wide open ocean. The only sounds were the splashing of waves

Over the years he had returned to the spot he remembered her leaving from. She had never came back, he counted each day... each month and year since she had dissapeared into the deep blue water. Inching close he slid off his sandals setting them to the side, stepping into the water, he sighed as the waves lapped over his aged feet.

"Hello Nya, I haven't got much time, but I wanted to see you one last time. Its been a couple years but my health took a sudden down turn and I was not sure I would be able to even make it this time," he rasped his voice no longer full of the youth he once held, he clutched the staff he had once taken from Wu to strike Wojira the day he had lost his Yang, his old Sensei had died decades ago.

"Theres a new Master of Water you know? Kais Granddaughter shot him mischeviously with a decent size ball of water," he chuckled "Surprised us a great deal."

He sighed, wishing just once he may be able to see his beloved of years past, if just for one last glimpse,

"I know I will not ever return beloved after this visit. With my age I will soon be bedridden and gone soon after that. So unfortunately in this life, this is goodbye," a tear slipped from eyes still their vibrant electric blue from decades earlier

As a final farewell, he sent a tiny jolt into the water, it was all of what remained of his abilities. Looking out one last time he turned to walk back up, not notice the water suddenly stirred he finally turned back when a laughter entered his ears.

Nya hovered there looking the same as she did all those years ago, she cocked her head

"Jay?" Her voice questioned as if she did not recognize him,

He did not blame her, happy she granted him his last wish, he smiles sadly tears brimming,

"Hello my sweetheart, been a long while"

Her eyes widened in surprise, how long had she been in the ocean? She did not think she had been gone for so long, she studied his face wrinkled his eyes the only youthful feature left after so many years even his hair once curled now looked course and flat.

"59 years love." He finally answered as if reading her mind

How had she lost track of time so easily? Jay gave her one of his old bright smiles,

"Do not fret, I will be gone soon enough both from here and the world." He drew in a deep raspy breath that made her concerned he waved it off "my body is not like yours it has aged."

Nya nodded still silent as if still trying to comprehend who stood in front of her,

"Well I won't further bug you. I just appreciate getting to see you again just before I head to the departed realm" He turned once again to leave

"Stay," she said simply he stopped turning back"Become one with sea like me."

He cocked his head confused how could he do so

"I can turn you into animal of seas." She explained "It has been...lonely."

He smiled softly, he had nothing to gain from staying on the land. He wanted nothing more to join her, he smiled softly

"It has been very lonely without you darling, my body is old and I am ready to join you"

The former master of lighting dug the staff into the sands, he sent his location with a simple message so his family did not question his disappearance settling the device and his glasses on the sands he wouldn't need them, before he looked ahead to the sea and tread further into the waves Nya making herself solid enough to help guide him slowly into the deeper water a tornado surrounded the two,

He felt himself slowly change as they walked further he carefully touched her cheek and when the tornado died down, a huge manta ray floated around her diving underneath before leaping above and over her spraying the Spirit of the Seas with water making the her laugh happily feeling more alive then she had in years

The Yin and Yang reunited immediately dived deep twisting around and through a pod of whales before swimming through a reef, playing with one another like they did so long ago.

#ninjago #ninjago season 15 #ninjago season 15 spoilers #ns15 spoilers #ns15 #jaya #future #lego ninjago #jay walker #nya smith

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starbuckie · 3 years

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𝐢𝐭'𝐬 𝐛𝐞𝐠𝐢𝐧𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐭𝐨 𝐥𝐨𝐨𝐤 𝐚 𝐥𝐨𝐭 𝐥𝐢𝐤𝐞 𝐜𝐡𝐫𝐢𝐬𝐭𝐦𝐚𝐬

challenge: winter warmers writing challenge by @spaceodditybarnes

prompt: “it’s beginning to look a lot like christmas” by michael buble

pairing: bucky barnes x reader

words: 2k without lyrics, 2.1k with lyrics

warnings: i genuinely don’t think i can say anything besides FLUFF, oh wait theres some mentions of the shmexy sex (i promise im a functioning person)

summary: in which they take a little holiday stroll and talk about what they are.

a/n: THIS MADE ME VERY HAPPY THANK YOU FOR HOSTING THIS CHALLENGE JADE!!! i kinda veered off the idea of christmas with this one, but my mind created another idea and i kinda just went with the flow. anyways, i really enjoyed writing this one, and i hope you all had a lovely holiday season <3 LOTS OF LOVE Y’ALL

main masterlist || sebastian stan characters masterlist

It’s beginning to look a lot like Christmas

Everywhere you go

Take a look at the five and ten, it’s glistening once again

With candy cane and silver lanes that glow

Snow sprinkled to the buildings and sidewalks of Midtown Manhattan, making the traffic clog up to the oh so lovely sounds of taxis and cars honking. It was far from what people pictured it, really, New York was absolute hell during the holiday season. Sloshing boots and teens smoking pot outside the scantily decorated discount store that held very little, sad-looking Christmas lights.

It didn’t bother Bucky. No, he had never been a big fan of the holiday season. Even back in the forties, with his ma and little sisters, they had never been huge on celebrating Christmas, instead choosing to work those shifts during the holiday so they could make a buck or two more to hold them over. Now in the twenty-first century, the holiday just reminded him how truly lonely he was, everyone and everything he used to know long gone.

But then he found Y/N. Granted, it had not been a formal introduction. The poor girl had nearly damn run him over with her motorcycle for Christ’s sake, but nonetheless she crawled into his heart that cold December morning two years ago, and had not left ever since.

Now she walked by his side at Rockefeller Center, her cold fingers intertwined with his warm ones, admiring the tree while he admired her. He already had every part of her memorized, from late night escapades in the sheets to studying the slope of her nose at team breakfasts. Even when he wasn’t with her, he was always looking at her, unable to pull his eyes away from Y/N’s radiance.

This little… dalliance of theirs had only started a year back, and they had still yet to put a label on it. Sam had called it friends with benefits, Sharon called it being a couple without the name. Bucky had shut both of those ideas down, claiming that they were taking it slow and weren’t looking to call it anything yet they still had not really talked about it. Was it really worth ruining the bond he had with the girl he fell madly in love with? Whatever it was, they had never taken time out of their day to actually discuss what they meant to each other, but, God, he’d be a liar if he said he didn’t want to know.

“Bucky?” Her sweet voice brought him out of his thoughts, the glittering red and white lights of the Christmas tree reflecting in her eyes. “You seem kind of distracted right now, sweetheart, are you bored? We can head back to the compound if you like.”

He smiled at her worried tone, delicately kissing the tip of her nose. “‘M just thinking, doll, wanna stay as long as I can out here with you.”

The grin he received in return was breathtaking, her red-painted lips turned upwards and a little twinkle (literally and metaphorically) in her eyes. “Good.”

It’s beginning to look a lot like Christmas

Toys in every store

But the prettiest sight to see, is the holly that will be

On your own front door

“Oh, look at that helicopter, Buck! That’s so cool!” Y/N pointed at a little boy in the store controlling the airborne toy with a small remote. “They didn't have those when I was a kid, I just had my Tamagotchi.”

He scrunched his nose, staring at her with an emotion that could be described as nothing other than distaste. “What the hell is a Tamagotchi?”

“A Tamagotchi was like this little digital pet thing that you could take care of, mainly used for kids who were trying to prove to their parents that they could take care of a real pet. That’s why I had one at least, but I never did get a tabby cat like I wanted.” Y/N continued to ramble about her weird pet thing as they walked through the toy store, though Bucky didn’t really care. But he’d never stop her either. The way her eyes lit up in childlike wonder and her fascination with the toys on the shelves was too precious to destroy. This was the girl who he had seen slit throats and blow aliens’ brains out, and in the moment she was ogling an American Girl Doll like it was the last pancake at the breakfast table.

Y/N finally convinced herself that she was done looking at the toys, claiming that she was too mature for such things (she really wasn’t), but he let her lead him out the door, before she halted right in the doorway. “What is it, honey?”

“Mistletoe.” He glanced up at the little sprig of green and red berries above their heads, hanging by a small strand of twine. A small group of kids with families stood around, watching them with both happy and annoyed faces. How could they not notice Y/N L/N and Bucky Barnes? Bucky’s vibranium arm may have been recognizable, but Y/N’s cheery, a little-louder-than-normal humming had caused a little group to watch them throughout the store. “I think they’re waiting for us to kiss, Buck.”

She leaned into him, placing her lips on his and placing her freezing hands on his cheekbones. Though Bucky had never been big on PDA, the rest of the world seemed to slip away when he was with her. He grinned into her lips, hugging her tightly around the waist so she squealed. When he forced herself away from her intoxicating mouth, she was sporting a bright smile and smudged lipstick that had rubbed off onto his.

Giggling, she took her thumb and swiped off some of the red residue she had left. “You had a little something there, sweetheart.”

A pair of hopalong boots and a pistol that shoots

Is the wish of Barney and Ben

Dolls that’ll talk and will go for a walk

Is the hope of Janice and Jen

Bucky watched Y/N point out all the different street cart vendors as they walked to Radio City Music Hall. She’d insisted that they go look at the window displays there as well, and who was he to argue? Strangely enough, they hadn’t talked much, other than the occasional “are you cold” from Bucky, to which Y/N assured him she was not. Her quiet voice sang the lyrics to Last Christmas when a little girl stopped in front of them, two auburn braids and green eyes boring straight into hers.

The small child pulled on Y/N’s skirt, a silent plea to go down to her height. “Hi there, are you lost, sweetie?”

“I wanted to talk to you,” she looked back to an older woman, who gave her a thumbs up and a smile, “because you are my favorite superhero and I hope you have a very good Christmas.”

Y/N nearly melted at the toothless smile the girl, who she assumed was named Sadie by the necklace she wore. “Thank you so much, sweetheart. I hope you have a good Christmas too, and do you know this guy?” She dragged Bucky down next to her, the large, buff man hulking over the small girl. “This is my friend Bucky, do you know him?”

He eyed her warily, as if he were absolutely terrified of the tiny human. “You’re the Winter Soldier!”

Uh oh. The name was one that struck a chord of fear through everyone, still in shock of the events that had taken place in D.C. in 2014. While he and Sam had tried to label a new brand for the Avengers, people didn’t forget all the horrors of HYDRA and their prized assassin. Of course it hadn’t been him, even he knew that, but trying to convince people otherwise still made him feel guilty.

“You’re my second favorite Avenger, after Y/N, of course.” Sadie brought her hand to hover over Bucky’s vibranium one, her eyes wide with excitement. “Mr. Bucky, can I touch your metal arm?”

The man in question could barely utter out a word, muttering some sort of agreement before nodding with a timid smile. Giddily, she touched his arm, feeling all the cool ridges of gold-plated vibranium against the gun-grey metal. Sadie continued to pelt questions at him, about Sam and Redwing to his “adventures” with Y/N on the team.

Bucky, though shy at first, got more and more relaxed as they continued their conversation, his grin growing wider. Y/N loved her fans, she loved them so, so dearly, but seeing them interact with the man she loved was something different. Not a bad different, but a word that could only be described as pure joy.

“Darling, I think we better leave Ms. L/N and Mr. Barnes alone. Say thank you and happy holidays.” The little girl looked sad, turning to look at her mom with a little pout, but she reluctantly obliged and soon the duo were off, into the crowded streets once again.

“Y’know once upon a time I had dreamed about having kids,” Bucky commented. They walked along the sidewalks in a comfortable quiet after the encounter with Sadie, but Bucky’s mind had not stopped reeling from the happiness his conversation brought him. “Was gonna come home from the war, settle down with a gal, and live to be at least seventy years old.”

“Well, I can tell you you’re good on the last bit of that, Buck.” He snorted at her jab at his age, something that has become a norm for their little makeshift family of four. “What do you want now?”

He stopped in his tracks and looked over at her with a fond tilt of his lips. “Oh, just something real special.”

It’s beginning to look a lot like Christmas

Toys in every store

But the prettiest sight to see, is the holly that will be

On your own front door

“Y/N, what are we?” She glanced over at him from where they sat on the Met stairs, giving their feet a break from walking for hours.

“What do you mean, Buck?”

He grabbed her hands and held them to his chest, trying to make her understand the amount of confusion and impatience he had with this one burdening question. “We’ve been sleeping together for a year, Y/N. We make each other breakfast, we go out together, I literally have half of my closet dedicated to your stuff, but even after all that we haven’t given us a name yet.”

Y/N sat in stunned silence, staring at the outburst from the man in front of her. To be completely honest she had never really thought about the question, choosing to enjoy each second she got to spend with the wonderful man with her. What she had noticed however, was how whenever they parted ways or were in the most intimate of moments, three little words nearly slipped off of her tongue. Every. Single. Time.

“Well, what do you want to be, Bucky?”

“I want to be the man you love. I want to be the man who loves you with his entire heart, though I like to think I already am. I want you to be my best gal more than anything in the world, and that I want to be the man who gets to hold and love you every night.” Slowly they drifted to each other, a magnetic pull bringing them to each other. “What do you think, doll?”

“I think,” her lips split into a grin, hovering over his own with the exact same expression, “that I want to be your best girl and the one who gets to make you pancakes in the morning and I want to be the one you get a cat with, who we’ll name Alpine because if I know you, names are the most important part of having a pet. I want to be held and loved by you every night, Bucky Barnes, and I am the girl who loves you more than anything in this entire damn world.”

Not another second to spare, Bucky pulled Y/N in close, letting himself get lost in one of her sweet, loving kisses, finally knowing that he was hers and she was his. At long last.

Sure, it’s Christmas once more

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randomfandominserts · 4 years

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Zuko x Reader - Home

Request: Hi! I wonder if you take requests. If that's the case would you maybe write something with Zuko please? Maybe Reader is really soft and friendly despite his efforts to push her away and gives him the feeling that hes enough, and that theres no need to return to his father. And he can't help but grow fond of her and get soft and maybe its the first time he lets her hug him and she kisses him on the cheek and he blushes?

Word Count: 4619

Note: So this is way longer and angsty-er than I was expecting it to be. It’s the first time I’ve written in a while so I’m super rusty but I hope you enjoy!

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It was never easy to be a Fire Nation run-away, a refugee with no way to express the loss you’ve had to face for fear of being banished from your new home. You were the child of a Fire Nation nobleman, a child who had been locked away from the world for years due to your lack of bending and possession of curiosity and empathy. Though you were usually soft-spoken and hesitant to disobey authority, you still made an effort to let those around you know you were against the Fire Lord and the war he supported.

Your blatant disrespect for the Fire Lord’s rule at royal events led to your separation from the noble world, and eventually the entire world. Fire Lord Ozai was clear, very clear, that had you continued to let your presence disrupt his events, you would face a fate worse than death and your parents would be punished for raising such a disrespectful child. So you were locked away, with no one to see but your tutors and the parents who desperately tried to pass on their vicious world views. No amount of force or manipulation could influence you to think anything but poor thoughts of the Fire Nation. The point came where they wanted nothing more than to rid themselves of their wretched child, and they offered to have you sent to the Fire Lord’s prison on charges of treason.

And so you left.

You ventured into the world, escaping in the night with a satchel full of stolen coins and a month’s worth of bread. You walked and walked, then hid away on a ship to travel to the Earth Kingdom, then continued to walk, then bought an ostrich horse and traveled more. Eventually, after months of travel, you made your way into Ba Sing Se as a refugee, beginning your new life.

Of course, life went on like this for months, until one day you ventured into your neighborhood’s tea shop and came face-to-face with two familiar men. Two very familiar members of the Fire Nation’s royal family.

It took everything in you not to scream out in surprise. Were they here to take you back? Punish you for escaping your fate? Execute you for treason? How had they even gotten into Ba Sing Se? But Iroh quickly pulled you aside, the gentle smile on his kind face calming your nerves immediately. “(Y/N),” he said, “It is very good to see you again.” You decided that a reunion with a friendly face was just what you needed, so you invited the pair over for dinner to learn more about what had happened.

You learned of their journey to find the Avatar, and you learned of Azula’s betrayal and their flee to the Earth Kingdom capital. Iroh was welcoming of having you in his life. He was always a kind man during court events, escorting you out and giving you tea when you angered his brother. Zuko, on the other hand, was more apprehensive about having you around. He had heard your words in the past defaming his father and protesting the war. He was unsure that you would keep their secret.

But you were much too kind to rat out two poor souls looking to move on with their lives. Besides, ratting them out only gave them reason to throw you under the bus as well. It was much better to simply throw caution to the wind and stick together. Keep your friends close and enemies closer, and anyone in-between stays close as well, you supposed.

With the help of the former royals, you were able to buy a much better place for the three of you. It was not fancy or even nice, but it was better than before and had two bedrooms, one for you and one for your housemates, and a living area rather than simply one large room.

Life was good. You and Iroh grew closer, much to Zuko’s dismay. He still distrusted you and was hesitant to let himself get close to you for fear of betrayal. You tried, though. Every evening when you both arrived home from work you greeted him with a smile, and sometimes a small gift from the shop you worked at. He was never blatantly rude, always mumbling a quick greeting or thank you, but would always shuffle into his room without a second word. You were determined to get on his good side, but he never seemed to show himself to you long enough to break the surface.

Slowly but surely, you and Iroh began to help Zuko warm to the idea of being your friend. Every day he would say a couple more words, stay out a little later before he shuffled to his room for the night. His (slight) openness warmed your heart, and you found yourself growing fond of the boy.

One night, Iroh was out late with some men he played Pai Sho with. That meant you were in charge of feeding yourself and Zuko for the night. You cooked up an old recipe you had learned years ago and placed the platters in front of the both of you.

“I hope you like it,” you started, watching as Zuko took a small spoonful into his mouth. “I haven’t cooked in ages.”

“Thank you,” Zuko replied, swirling the food in his bowl. “It’s good.”

“It’s an old recipe that my grandmother taught me.” Zuko took another mouthful of food, quietly thinking over the words you said.

“You must miss her,” he finally said. It was a statement rather than a question, and though he was unsure he painted it as though he was certain of himself.

“I couldn’t,” you countered, placing your own bite on your tongue. There was silence as Zuko watched you swallow your food, waiting for you to continue. “The things that my family has done, what would make me miss such corruption and misery?” You found yourself staring down at your bowl, the steam hitting your face in a comforting puff of heat. “It’s much like your father. You don’t miss him.” Your words shadowed his, an unsure statement once again presented as confident truth.

Zuko didn’t reply, instead opting to sip his water and stare past your head. You figured that meant the conversation had ended, so you sighed and continued to eat your food in silence. Zuko’s sharp breathing and the clattering of spoons against bowls were the only noises present until Iroh burst in through the door, cheerfully greeting you both. He paused once he sensed the tense atmosphere and settled at the table with you both.

“What are you eating? It looks delicious,” he said, causing you to smile.

“I’ll grab you a bowl,” you said, rising from the table quickly. Once you cleaned your bowl and filled one for Iroh, you headed back to the table. “It’s an old Fire Nation recipe. I think you’ll like it,” you told Iroh as you placed his food in front of him. Zuko continued to avoid your gaze, and you figured it was time to go. “I think I’ll head to bed now. Goodnight.” With that, you were off.

You hadn’t been able to sleep. You were unsure of what time it was, but the black sky outside your window told you it wasn’t yet nearing the morning. With a sigh, you pushed yourself out of bed and off to the kitchen to fetch a cup of tea to soothe you to sleep.

To your surprise, the kitchen wasn’t empty when you arrived. Zuko sat at the table, a cup of tea sitting on the table in front of him. He twirled the contents of the cup with a single heated finger, causing the contents to boil and bubble. As you shut your door, he swung around to meet your eyes with a questioning look. “I couldn’t sleep,” you said simply as you took the seat across from him. He nodded before standing to grab a second cup from the cupboard.

“Would you like some tea?” he asked, lifting the pot to begin his pour. “Don’t worry, my uncle made it before he went to sleep.” You nodded, taking the warm cup from his hands and sipping it. You both sat in silence for a moment, daring the other to break it. You decided to take the bait and set your cup down with a gentle thud.

“I apologize for what I said earlier,” you started, staring down at your mug. The lightly-colored liquid glistened in the light of the lone lantern Zuko had lit, and you couldn’t help but fasten your attention to the shimmering reflection rather than the grumpy prince. “I meant nothing by implying you didn’t miss your father. I only assumed-”

“It’s fine.” He cut you off suddenly, his scratchy voice holding a sharp tone. “I don’t miss him. You’re right.” Though he tried to hide it, he always tried to hide it, you could hear the pain in his voice. You looked up and met his amber eyes, searching for answers.

“You must miss something.” There was something about the way he worded his sentence, something about the way he avoided looking directly at you. You could tell he wasn’t being entirely truthful, so you pushed.

“I suppose I do.” He was curt, unwilling to give you the answer you desired, so you changed the subject before the tense silence you were both so accustomed to could swallow you whole.

“It’s beginning to feel like a home here, isn’t it?” You tried to give him a small smile, evoke a little emotion from the boy, but he stared blankly as you spoke. “The plants I bought from the shop bring a little light into this place.”

“This isn’t a home.” Zuko stood abruptly, shaking the table as he pushed away. Drops of tea spilled over the top of your cup, splashing onto the wood of the table. “This isn’t my home.” He stormed out of the house, leaving no trace except his boiling cup of tea and your spilled one. You sighed before rising to clean up.

You traveled around the table to grab Zuko’s half-filled drink, only to immediately drop it at the feeling of the burning hot cup. You cursed as the hot contents spilled onto your bare feet and the cup shattered on the floor. At the sound of this commotion, Iroh slid open his door and peeked into the kitchen.

“Zuko is gone. Is everything alright?” You gave no answer, instead sitting on the floor to look at your burnt feet and clean up the broken cup. Iroh stepped out into the kitchen to examine the situation, sighing when he saw your red feet and turning back to his room. He returned with a towel, a broom, and some bandages for your feet, and helped lift you to a seat to bandage yourself while he cleaned the spilled tea. You slowly wrapped your burns, unsure of what to say. Luckily, Iroh knew how to break the silence. “Did you fight?” he questioned. You shook your head.

“We were having a discussion.”

“A discussion.” Iroh’s hearty laugh filled the atmosphere, instantly bringing you comfort. “My nephew hardly knows how to have a discussion.” You shrugged, not knowing what to say.

“I hadn’t meant to offend him.” You finished wrapping your feet and stood, testing to make sure the bandages would stay. “We spoke of his father, and he said he didn’t miss him, but he still sounded sad.” You stumbled to the flower pot which housed the small flowering bush you had brought home. It made the place feel so lovely, and it was such a beautiful addition to the dreary interior of your poor home. You sighed and brushed a finger over its leaves. “I spoke of home, this home. But this isn’t his home.”

“Come, sit.” Iroh walked over and helped you to sit in a chair at the table. He sat across from you and slid a cup across the table. “I figure you could use some fresh tea,” he said with a smile. You took a sip and smiled, silently thanking him for the warmth and comfort housed in the cup.

The silence was once again broken by Iroh’s kind voice. “My nephew has been through many things. It has been a long while since he has had a place to call home.”

“Of course. I never meant to invalidate him in any way.” You hadn’t meant to hurt or offend Zuko. It felt as though Ba Sing Se was becoming a home, a true home, for both you and him. “I only thought that we finally had something good, all of us. A home.”

“And that we do.” Iroh took a sip of his own tea and let out a sigh. “But this is not the home my nephew wants. He desires a home with his family.”

“You’re his family. Is this not enough for him?” You felt yourself getting worked up, and your tea threatened to once again spill over the edge of the cup that rested in your shaky hands. “How can he desire to go home to people who have hurt him?”

“Family is a strange thing, (Y/N). As is desire.”

“His father scarred him. Banished him. What more proof does he need that there is no home where that man is?” Once again, drops of tea splashed onto the wood in front of you. Quickly, you set the tea down and rose from your chair. “Thank you for the tea. I think I’ll be heading to bed.” Iroh simply sipped his tea and nodded.

“Remember, it takes courage to stand fast in your beliefs. All are not as strong as you, (Y/N). All are not so certain.” You nodded your head before slipping away to your room. As you laid in bed, Iroh’s words echoed in your ears. Zuko desperately wanted a home with his family. He wanted acceptance, despite anything that may have happened to him. It broke your heart knowing that he wanted nothing more than his father’s love, even when his father cared so little of him.

“Zuko!” You called out to the taller boy, waving him outside. He was working, but the shop wasn’t busy and it seemed they had little to do. It had been a couple of days since your tense chat, and though you both seemed to be back to normal you had yet to discuss what had happened. It was constantly on your mind, but you felt it was better to keep the peace than put Zuko in an uncomfortable position to discuss family with an outsider. “I’m about to head to lunch. Would you like to join me?”

He nodded in your direction, let Iroh know where he was off to, and stripped off his apron. “Where are we eating?” he asked as you walked down the stone streets. You held up a basket of food, a small smile on your face.

“I thought we could picnic, if that’s alright?” Zuko once again nodded, and you two set off to find a nice spot to sit and eat. Your walk was silent, the only sound present being the beating of your feet against the stone path, but it was strangely comforting. Eventually, you came across an empty plaza and settled down by the fountain. As you worked to pull out the food you prepared, Zuko strolled around the plaza.

“Thank you for this,” he said when you finished, and plopped down next to you. “You don’t need to always cook for me.”

“It’s not a problem,” you insisted, shoving some food in his hands. “Here, try this. You like spicy food, right?” With that, the two of you began your quiet meal. Zuko was, as usual, not very talkative, but you tried to fill the empty space with jokes and laughter. You even managed to get a small smile out of the dark-haired boy.

All too soon, lunch was over and the two of you had to get back to your respective jobs. As you journeyed back through the streets, a sheet of paper floated down just in front of you both. Zuko reached out to pluck it from the air, eyeing it carefully. His eyes seemed to widen as he read the sheet. “What is it?” you asked, peering over to try and catch a glimpse. The sheet was quickly removed from your line of sight with a grumbled response telling you it was nothing, don’t worry about it. Unconvinced, you reached over and ripped the sheet from his hands, giving it a quick once over.

“A… flying bison?” You were confused, why did a missing pet have Zuko in such a mood? You continued scanning the sheet until you reached the bottom, where it listed who to contact if the bison were found. “Oh.” You held the crumpled sheet back out to Zuko, and he was quick to snatch it from your hands. You felt a lump growing in your throat, unsure of what to say to the boy who stood beside you. The Avatar was in Ba Sing Se, and it seemed Zuko was ready to run after him and return back to his old life immediately.

“I have to go,” he said, but you reached out and grabbed his wrist to stop him from entering the shop. At this moment words seemed to fail you, and you just stared up at him, sadness in your eyes. He avoided your gaze. He looked anywhere but at your accusing stare, anywhere but the disappointment your eyes held. Slowly, you loosened your grip on his wrist, and his arm dropped back to his side. “Thank you for lunch.”

Later, you sat in your apartment helping Iroh brainstorm names for his new tea shop while you cooked dinner. Iroh had gotten the offer to have his own shop and a nicer apartment today, and upon hearing the news you decided to celebrate. Zuko stormed in while you were tossing around silly names, the crumpled flyer held tight in his hand.

“The Avatar is here in Ba Sing Se,” he said, holding the paper out to Iroh. You tensed upon hearing the words, knowing what conversation was to follow. “He’s lost his bison.”

Iroh was as displeased as you, and voiced his concerns to Zuko. The boy stormed off, leaving you and Iroh frozen in the kitchen. You softly stirred the food while Iroh continued to spout silly name ideas for the new shop.

That night, you were staring at the ceiling when you heard a noise from the front, followed by a quiet curse. You rolled out of bed and exited your room, only to find Zuko in the living area, shoes on and dual swords by his side. “Where are you going?” you questioned, causing the boy to jump.

“Out,” he replied simply as he dug through a box. What was he was searching for? You crossed the room to take the spot beside him and leaned over the box for a peak. It was full of random keepsakes, things you’d never seen before. Probably a box that was purposefully hidden away, full of things Zuko wanted no one else to see.

“Out,” you repeated, a hint of resignation in your voice. You knew exactly what that meant, and your suspicions were only confirmed when you saw Zuko pull a blue mask from the depths of his box. “You’re going after the bison, aren’t you?”

“What do you think, (Y/N)?” He stood up, tucking the mask into his waistband. “I have to.”

“You don’t,” you said gently. He shook his head at the thought and moved to turn away, but you grabbed his wrist and tugged, forcing him to turn back to you. “Zuko, this isn’t your responsibility anymore. You’re free. You’re finally free to be who you want, and yet you still choose this path of pain.” You tried to look to him, but he was looking away from you, hiding any emotion that he might be showing on his face.

“You don’t get it,” he tried to say, but you scoffed at the thought.

“No, you don’t get it, Zuko!” Rare as it was, you felt yourself losing your grip. He couldn’t see how much this was hurting him, or hurting his uncle, or hurting you. He couldn’t see that he had options now that he resided in Ba Sing Se. He couldn’t see the home that you and Iroh had built up for him. “You don’t understand how much you have. We have a home, Zuko, we have our little family. Iroh is happy! He’s getting his own tea shop. You’ll be able to enjoy your life, and yet you still want to do everything you can to make your father proud and go back to that wretched palace.”

You were so frustrated and tears threatened to spill, but Zuko still refused to even glance in your direction. He tried to tug free of your grip, but you still held on tight. “Let go,” he said, his voice firm. You hesitated before complying, but he didn’t move immediately.

“Can you at least look at me?” Your voice trembled. You didn’t have much left in you. The least he could do was look in your eyes while you pleaded with him to stay. It took a moment before he turned his head back towards you. His expression was blank, but his eyes betrayed him. Though you couldn’t decipher it, there was something hidden behind his gaze. Sadness, anger, guilt? You couldn’t tell. “You don’t have to go. Stay here. Be happy with us. Don’t do this, please.”

“You have no idea what you’re talking about.”

“I know exactly what I’m talking about.” You tried to reach out to him, to grab his arm once again and tug him closer, but he stepped just out of your reach. “Zuko, there’s nothing left for you there. You may steal the bison or capture the Avatar, but then what? You return home to a family that doesn’t care for you as much as we do. They don’t love you at all.” He was turning away from you again, and you leapt forward to latch onto him. “Look at me. Please, just look at me and tell me honestly that you’ll be happier with your father than with us.” He couldn’t, and you knew he couldn’t. You tried holding his attention, but he tugged his arm away without a word and averted his eyes.

“I’m going. Don’t follow me.” Your pleas had fallen on deaf ears. Zuko tucked his swords into their holder and left, not even sparing you a second glance. You felt frozen in time as quiet tears streaked down your face.

After what felt like hours (but was likely only minutes), you shuffled to the back room and knocked on a door. It opened to reveal a sleepy-looking Iroh, but he immediately woke when he saw the state you were in. “Zuko’s gone.”

You barely slept that night, and you slept even less when Zuko came back with a fever. You stayed by his side, making sure he always had a cool rag on his head and some water nearby to drink. Iroh insisted you take turns watching over the prince, but you couldn’t help but worry.

Iroh had told you what happened that night, and you were incredibly proud of Zuko. You knew it must have been hard for him to realize his path, but you were glad that this was the path that he had chosen. You wanted more than anything for him to have a chance at happiness alongside you and his uncle.

It was late at night when Zuko finally recovered from his feverish state. You were reading a book beside him and barely noticed he had risen when he decided to speak. “How long have I been sick?” You glanced over the top of your book to see the prince sitting up on the floor. He looked much better, albeit still a bit weak from the cold. You could hardly contain the smile that spread onto your face.

“It’s only been a couple of days. Are you hungry?” You quickly rose from your seat beside him, but he reached out to you as you walked away.

“Wait,” he requested. You slowed to a stop and returned to his side. “I wanted to thank you for what you said.” The complex mix of emotions you had seen in his eyes the night he left was now spread across his face. Sadness, anger, guilt, and now embarrassment? You couldn’t tell, but at least now he wasn’t hiding it. “You helped me realize that I do have a choice. I can be happy, I just need to choose it.”

The smile on your face grew wider. “And you’re choosing us?”

“I’ve realized you and my uncle are my real family.” You couldn’t contain your joy as you reached out to hug Zuko. He hadn’t noticed and was moving to get up, so you quickly stopped and regained your composure. You stood too, hoping the boy hadn’t noticed.

“I’ll go get Iroh. I’m sure he’s excited to see you.”

It was the first morning in your new apartment in the Upper Ring. You could smell Iroh cooking in the large kitchen, but you were distracted by the sight of Zuko watering the plants you had brought from your old apartment. He had gotten up much earlier than you, which didn’t usually happen, so it was a welcoming sight to see him glowing in the morning sun with your plants.

“I didn’t think you liked those,” you said, causing him to jump. Once he saw it was you, he shook his head as he returned his attention to the plants.

“They’ve grown on me,” he replied. You smiled and moved to his side, watching as he cared for the bush. He seemed so happy now, his usual scowl replaced with the hint of a smile and shining eyes. You wished you could watch the scene play out forever, but he broke the moment when he set the watering can down and turned to you. “You were right. They do make it feel like home.” He gave you a small smile, and your heart melted.

Without thinking, you stepped closer to him and wrapped your arms around him. He was taken by surprise and stood frozen for a moment, before gently wrapping his around you. “I’m so glad you stayed,” you said softly. “I’m glad you’re home.” You pulled away to smile up at him and quickly rose on your toes to peck his cheek. He immediately grew red at the kiss.

“I- uh, well, I’m glad I stayed too,” he stammered, turning his face away from you. Of course, Iroh chose that moment to enter the room.

“Nephew, your face is as red as a tomato,” he said with a chuckle. “Has your fever returned?”

“Of course not,” Zuko countered, before picking up the watering can and shuffling quickly out of the room to avoid any more conversation. With a knowing look on his face, Iroh shot you a wink and then let you know breakfast was ready. He exited, leaving you alone in the room.

You reached out to gently stroke the leaves of the bush in front of you. You were all finally home. Only good things could be in store for your new-found family. With a small smile plastered on, you skipped off to the kitchen to enjoy the first breakfast of your new, happy life.

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