#now im gonna make a rare journey into the tags for it

[songofsaraneth]

tv show reccomendation: Scavengers Reign!

adult animated series on HBO Max about survivors of a spaceship wreck surviving on an alien planet, a pal originally pitched it as "Nausicaa meets Annihilation vibes" in terms of whimsy + body horror elements, and I think that both fits and is a compelling way to describe it. the plot isn't the most in depth but I think that allows the show to wrap everything up nicely in the 12 eps and maximize screen time on the best part which is the alien planet's ecology and worldbuilding.

it was also just very refreshing i feel like theres been a divide in western animation in recent years where a lot of "adult" shows are that way solely because they're crude/sexual/edgy, and meanwhile anything "whimsical" gets slotted into kid genres and is therefore limited in how far it can push anything. so its nice to get a show that balances whimsy with body horror elements without relying on like, sex or fart jokes.

also the last episode has a really gorgeous animation sequence nearish the end, you rarely see animation of earth-biology/geology/evolution done with such care and attention to detail, and it was really wonderful to see how much effort the writers/animators put into that aspect of the show and clearly loved it + wanted the viewer to love it too

#as an ecologist i am Always watching alien sci fi for the biology etc #not necessarily to find every flaw but just to see how much effort goes into it and this one sure does!!! #yes you have to accept basic premise of breathable atmosphere and not everything being poisonous #but the environment is both help and hindrance in this show and they have to always be interacting with it often in cool ways #scavenger's reign #i havent seen it on my dash at all so!!!! go watch #now im gonna make a rare journey into the tags for it #ramblings #animation #jade recs #eta: well fuck me the tag is me and 8 other people/posts #lmao someone who can make gifs pls watch this #i want to reblog the cool alien guys #UPDATE #ok theres more posts i just had an apostrophe that i guess does not belong #scavengers reign

[stargazer0001]

(art from above is by @/sleepinginmute.)

Hello everyone! I’m Stargazer0001! But you can just call me Star :3

my pronouns are she/they/he/it/astro in no particular order. I like em all so use them interchangeably

I'm your local lil space critter, who has declared themself the CEO of the rainworld ship Stargazer (spearmaster x rivulet x nightcat)

I'm a silly littol spacegender fellar :3 How can I be lesbian and spacegender at the same time you ask? Fuck you thats how!/j Im also asexual so no NSFW please! This blog is meant to be at least a bit more kid friendly, even if there are more mature topics

I am also a furry so if you do not like them then please leave here

I am also questioning if I am a therian and fictionkin. I have done research on both and I am now taking them into consideration. Im not gonna label myself yet because I still might not be, but if anyone has helpful info on them then please do share :)

I have a secret draw box! if you wanna draw for me anonymously, you can go here to do it! I check every couple days.

Ask box: Open

Ship requests: closed. Uhhh i frogor to update this for a while so uh yeagh.

Ask me stuff: Always open unless the ask box is closed

Tell me silly things: Yes I want to talk to people!! Please give me silly asks i need them....

art requests: not open sorry :( artblock is blocking my art so

I wanna make my blog more organized now so I am going to start tagging stuff

#my art Art that is made by me

#Art request anytime my art requests are open I will tag it with this

#ask An ask that I have answered, this also applies to anon asks

#Star.TXT document this is for anytime I am just talking

#vent this if for anytime I just need to talk and vent about stuff

#lil starz art this is for my really old art, such as the ones near the beginning of my Tumblr journey

#Silly chat this is me and my mutuals little chats! Like if they send a lighthearted friend ask I will tag it with silly chat

IF YOU DONT WANNA SEE A CERTAIN TAG THEN FILTER IT

I rarely block people but I still will on occasion. Please don't take any hard feelings if I do block you.

Basic DNI such as NSFW blogs, homophobes, transphobes, fatphobes, racists, antifurries and antitherians, and zionists

Cool moots who you should go check out if you like my blog:

@critter2: My IRL bestie that ive been with for a long time. We've been together through the highest of highs and the lowest of lows. The bestie ever :3

@cookieeevee: An amazing friend! The first person to ever really DM me on here and I'd like to say that we've grown to be good friends. We have amazing little chats and she's an amazing person! Their art is also so soft and squishable! Go check em out

@sleepinginmute: one of my first moots! Such an amazing and silly creature. Its art is amazing, and even though im unsure if it considers me a friend, I know that I do. I really do wish the best for it and I hope that it can be truly happy someday

@cumulusbrume: we dont interact very often anymore, but I still find him a great moot to this day

@athofear: I fun lil fello!! Always a fun time interacting with em. Their art is also superrr shaped and silly!! Always a treat to see them on my dash

@meowyncherry: we dont interact much but he gave me the kinitopet brainrot and their art is also super blorbo so :3

@suburbandrifts: once again, we dont interact very often but they seem very cool and silly/pos and their art is incredibly good! mm the colors are coloring/pos @weeeeblr:!!! The art ever actually!!! Idk how we're mutuals cause hes super cool actually. Great art, and his designs for basically everything is peak/srs

@bananacat76: the bestie does indeed make art!!! And said art is amazing!! Such a cool person and fren :3 their style is also incredibly interesting I need to study it under a microscope/aff

@keeper-of-magic:!!! Cool person alert!!! Their art is amazing and their worldbuiding skills are super awesome!!! I also gotta try and play DND with them sometime.... I have no idea how to but it seems fun, just like them!

@badgerfrost: the silly ever!!! Its art is very well colored and its basically eye candy at this point, and ever time we interact I KNOW its gonna be a goood time

@draagu: ohhhh the silly!!! We dont interact much but shes a super cool moot and idk how we're mutuals like. ??? awesome person with awesome art FOLLOWED ME????? Awesome

@dazzoot: we have interacted a total of like 1 time but cool mutual deserves an honorary tag

GO CHECK ALL OF THESE SILLY PPL OUT!!! THEY'RE AWESOME :333 (if I forgor anyone i am so sorry. Also if you want me to untag you just ask. I dont wanna make anyone uncomfy)

Talking to people spooks me

I have anxiety so please be patient with me, I usually overthink what I am going to say and then end up saying something either really stupid, kinda weird, or I just don't respond.

I am mentally a 5 year old so please inform me if I did something wrong, I usually wont notice or I will think its not an issue. Please be patient with me.

if you sat through all of that, congrats! You get rw gifs now :)

#Intro #rainworld #rainworld downpour #rw shipping #hiii #tag navigation -> #my art #Art request #ask #Star.TXT document #vent #lil starz art

[sunmoonjune]

opening up notes bc i already know this is gonna be another chapter that serves and i need to keyboard smash all my feels

can i just start off by saying yun tapping bug's language or yun holding bug's hand or anything related to his hands has me reeling bc ive recently developed such a huge thing for them it's embarrassing aslfkdgsajg like they're so pretty it's illegal also apparently his hands are 21cm ??? like ??? my hands are probably the size of his palm someone hold me pls

im melting bug used to be so alert during her sleep she would subconsciously be waiting in fear of danger and she would rarely ever leave her good eye covered bUT NOw she's subconsciously reaching for physical contact and comfort from the boys AND THEN YOU'RE TELLING ME SHE'S ALSO COMPLETELY TRUSTING JONGHO TO PROTECT HER WHILE SHES ASLEEP OGM MY HERART

intermission to tell you just how much i love each and every single interaction that you put into each chapter bc they are such simple moments and actions that could easily be skipped over when thinking about the grand scheme of the plot but you always manage to highlight their significance in bug's journey of healing. ltm is the epitome of it's the little things in life ❤️

seeing bug curled on the floor next to san's bed was so cute but also so bittersweet. i think ateez need a new cavern where the whole floor is just bed so they can all be close and have cute puppy piles. also PLEASE HAHA not bug going 🥵🥵 seeing hongjoong's forearm muscles 💪💪 honestly though,,, same

my lack of vocab cannot express the amount of feels i got from bug finally giving captain his name symbol bc it's not even just 'hongjoong' but 'MY hongjoong' and it encompasses so many meanings like home and their heartbeats brb im ugly crying

Briefly, there’s a startling realization that they don’t change for you either. -> 👏WE👏LOVE👏CHARACTER👏DEVELOPMENT👏AND👏SELF👏LOVE 👏 i love the parallels revealed between hongjoong's and bug's past because hopefully bug can start to realise that she is also capable of displaying the scar on her face without worrying and finding love in this little family just like hongjoong has

woosan peering over the edge of the bed to look at bug and hongjoong only serves to reiterate my point that they need a nine-person mattress stat. and the way they giggled together like kids i swear they're the cutest

also my tag doesn't work idk why but it's okay bc i check your posts more religiously than i wake up for work so jks on tumblr 😎

AHHHH I LVOE YOU SO MUCH <333

the way my heart goes !!#!$!$! whenever I get a long ask after a new chapter is posted xD I love them SO MUCH <33

ok but yunho's hands are SO pretty,, I definitely have liked more than one TikTok of his hands so you're not alone xD

bug trusting jongho to guard her in her sleep <333 she really was sleeping for quite a bit of this chapter xD but that's okay, she needed it :'))

intermission to tell you that I love you SO MUCH <33 I'm so glad you guys don't mind the slow pacing with these little interactions! they might be considered filler in some stories but the slow progression is really important to me in this story :"D

also ateez should definitely just make a cave with just mattresses on the floor for one big bed xD they def need the cuddling space :}}

(and SAME bug, I too am weak for joong's forearm muscles xD)

MY hongjoong <333 crying screaming throwing up they love each other SO MUCH,, and joong's name symbol does indeed have the word for 'home' in it :") I was wondering if anyone would pick that up hehe >:D

also bug 🤝 hongjoong 🤝 zuko 🤝 having shitty father figures HAHA,, but yes bug's growing so much :")) finally beginning to realize that she is not her past and she can grow into her own person with ateez <3

woosan giggling like teenagers with crushes made me so happy I swear xD yeosang was done with their shit and just wanted to sleep HAHA

also I'm not quite sure why your tag doesn't show up :(( I've been poking around on tumblr but sometimes blog's just don't pop up when I try to tag them D: I hope I can get it sorted out tho! I'm glad that you were able to find the new chapter without it tho <3

#moonie speaks #like the moon #moonie's favs <3

[theonlythingimfuckingisstupid]

Hello please tell me about Echo, I would like to know :)

taco i’m always willing to talk about echo, he’s one of my favorite characters to rant about

ok i know this ask was inspired by the ‘tag the oc with the saddest ending’ post but since its been so long since you sent it, its been marinating in my head for days so i’m just gonna rant in general 

(lots under the cut. like lots. almost 1500 words)

Echo was actually supposed to be the main character bc he joins nyks and spence on their journeys (there was going to be like four pov’s) but then i gave him some background that i didnt share and didnt feel like i could really do it justice with him being the main character. It’s still talked about and i feel like i do a good job covering it, but he’s not the main character bc i think its important to let people share their stories but still have a diverse set of characters (if that makes sense at all). I wont talk about the background in this rant (just because how i reveal it in the story is how i want it to be figured out)

Ok i want to talk about his family first. He lives with lots of other people. His parents, his older sister and brother, his younger sister and brother, his grandma, and his older brother’s two kids and wife, and his older sister’s fiancee. He shares a room with his younger sister and brother, so he’s closer with those two naturally. They’re three years younger than him. Not twins but theyre the same age (they kinda adopted freddie. Frankie is his bio sister). His older brother is six years older than him and his kids are two and four. His older sister is two years older than him. His grandma has dementia and doesnt really like him for no real reason (its just the vibes since he has magic and she can kinda sense it). He had a twin sister (Skrell) but her magic was discovered and she was killed. 

Next im talking about his magic. He has reactive magic, which is pretty impossible to control. In any other kingdom, it would protect him, but since Terilace has a magic ban, it’s nearly gotten him killed more times than he’d like to admit. Its really rare to have reactive magic, to the point where no one can really test for it like they can the other types of magic. It’s only in people who havent had a magician in the family tree for at least five generations, are the second born twin, and are not their parent’s first pregnancy. The first twin usually has a different type of emotion related magic (skrell had empathetic magic, which means that she knew what everyone was feeling. It caused a lot of overloads and she stayed home pretty much all the time). He also has very weak shadow magic, but he doesn’t find out about that until later. 

Now im talking about his job. He’s the oldest Assistant at the library, he’s been there longer than Xander, the Librarian. His old boss was killed by a poisonous animal that got into the library mysteriously (its kinda hinted at how it got in but im not getting into that now). His sections are magic, psychology, magical wildlife (which doesnt fall under the magic section), horticulture, and Terilace history. There are only two other Assistants, Zoey and William who are 14 and 16 respectively. He trained them both but now they’re able to work without his help. When the story starts, he’s training an Assistant to replace him since he and Haven are going to leave the kingdom soon. There are also ten to fifteen (depends on lots of things) Scribes at the Library and their only job is to copy information into books. The Assistants organize and compile all the info they put into the books and are in charge of making sure everything is in the right place. They have to know where everything in their sections is. There are blue hermit spiders that live in the bookshelf. The first Librarian added them to the shelves to protect the books and information. They live for anywhere between twenty and eighty years, depending on what they decide to do. Some “adopt” Assistants and live with them until one of them dies. If the Assistant dies first, then the spider lives on their grave until it dies. It’s the most loyal species in the world. Echo has one that he calls Monster, but its name is Cecil (this isnt important i just wanted to share its name). I could keep talking about the Library for hours, but ive already gotten off topic quite a bit, so im moving on. 

I want to touch on some relationships he has outside of his family. He and haven have known each other for almost fifteen years. Haven and her mom moved inside the Terilace castle walls when she was three (he was five) and they became fast friends. Haven spends a lot of time at his house bc her mom is kinda controlling and haven doesnt like being around her. She rants to him and he listens, she doesnt know much about his life though (which is how he likes it). Spencer and him have a sort of relationship. By which i mean spence has a crush on him and echo pretty much hates him. Spence turns in a lot of magicians bc he was raised being taught that any kind of magic is evil and there is no good in it. He’s also the prince (future king. Again, i can talk about the kingdom and traditions for a long time but this is about echo soo..), so echo cant really tell him to leave him alone. Robert (spence’s older brother) and him are friends. Rob came to the Library one day and needed something from one of echo’s sections, so they got to talking and now they’re fairly close. Not that anyone can know that bc the royals arent really supposed to have friend outside of the castle. He has lots of other relationships too, but not any major ones that come up in the story, so they’re not super fleshed out (yet). 

His main arc is learning to open up and talk about things, which nyks and emberly help with a lot. He learns that he doesnt need to bottle everything up and that being vulnerable isnt the end of the world. He doesnt really care a lot about his health and tries to take care of everyone and everything before he even thinks about himself, but he learns to stop doing that too. He also learns how to control his emotions other than just making himself feel numb so his magic doesnt get him killed. 

He’s aroace, which is a huge part of who he is. He doesnt really understand romance, but wishes he could date (he ends up dating emberly and nyks platonically). His aromanticism is more important to him than his asexualtiy, but his ace-ness is also a huge part of his identity. 

Ok, so i know this ask was prompted by the ‘which character has the saddest ending’ post i rb’d, so ill get into that. Because he didnt use his magic for the first (almost) twenty-one years of his life, he dies young. With most emotional magic, its important to embrace it. Same with shadow magic. His shadow magic is weak already, but since he doesnt find out about it until he finally settles down, it takes a lot of years off his life. After he, nyks, and emberly settle down in a big house where he can just. relax. He spends a lot of time doing the things he loves. He bakes, gardens and spends a lot of time reading topics he enjoys learning about. Up until he moved out of Terilace, he worked from dawn to dusk. When he woke up, he had to help his ma in the bakery, then he’d go to work. When he got back from work, he had to help in the bakery. The only downtime he got was the hour after the bakery closed and before frankie got home from work. He was able to go to his room and just take a break. Then when frankie got back home, he would have to help with dinner and cleaning around the house, he also watched his brother’s kids a lot. So when he finally finds a home with the people he loves, he’s able to work when he wants to on what he wants to. Then, once he’s settled, he starts to get sick. He knew he would, even before he found out about his shadow magic. It just happens when you suppress your magic for twenty years (give or take). He wrote letters to everyone who he thought should know (family, emberly, haven, old work friends, robert) and dies in his late thirties or early forties (i havent decided yet). 

Theres so much more i could talk about (and i probably will eventually) but for now, it’s almost 4am, i have a full day and need to get some sleep. (feel free to ask about anything i brought up in this, i love talking about my wip)

#echo song #em rambles #character rants #taco :D #thank you for the ask :)

[gremlin-gr4pes]

Analogical request- Logan lives on the other side of the country from Virgil, and Virgil has been struggling so Logan sends a “you can do this” card and a teddy bear with a tie on it to help Virgil get through what he’s going through. 💜💜💜

Analogical request by @hedgiehoggles

Before we start. Let's clarify. This is an Analogical one shot that has been requested with a prompt ask. I do not own these characters and I may draw some artwork to go with it if I ever get the inspiration.

(PS. This will take place in 3rd person)

Word count: 7, 835 (woah 0-0)

Tw: Anxiety attack, crying, hurt-comfort, fluff. Please tell me if I've missed anything.

Au: Human

•-------------------------------------------------•

It had been rough. This whole week, A bombardment of assignments. Deadlines that he just could not meet. Not to mention he didn't understand what the current question he was stuck on. The words didn't make sense to him, not to mention the whole subject confused him. English. Well not the subject excactly, it was their current topic that confused him the most. Most of the text was in Latin and poor Virgil had his download of the translation crash and delete. Which stressed him out even more. He needed that translation if he didn't want to fail this course.

He had been trying to save that download for over an hour now and he just couldn't. He couldn't take it anymore.

A wet substance fell onto his keyboard alerting Virgil that he was now crying. Which in return made him realise how stressed this entire ordeal had made him as he now noticed his hands trembling over the keys of his laptop. The hitched sound as he inhaled and exhaled in short shakey breaths. His thoughts spiraling as the dreaded feeling began to settle in.

Virgil moved his laptop away as he shut the damned thing, it was unbearable to look at anymore. Bringing his knees to his chest, the teen buried his head inside as he hugged them tightly. His breathing quick and sharp. He knew what his boyfriend would say. What he would do.

Logan loved Virgil and Virgil loved Logan. The only thing in the way was the long distance between their states. Logan lived in Ohio as Virgil lived in Florida. It was an unbearable fact that they had to deal with. Hopefully college would be better.

Though, even the thoughts of his loved one surrounded him, it didn't cease his crying, nor his trembling. Virgil raised his head, reaching for his phone, decorated with a plain black case with a bunch of band stickers stuck on.

With blurred vision he tried his best to get onto the chat with Logan.

Virge💜:

Hey,.

Lo✨💙:

Hello, Darling. Is something the matter?

Virgil let out a small laugh. He always knew if something was wrong.

Virge💜:

can ee call??

Immediately the phone lit up, asking to accept or decline. Virgil didn't even care if Logan chose a voice call or video call, he immediately answered and was met with Logan settling his phone down on his desk. A concerned look loomed over his usual stoic face.

"Virgil? Darling, what's the matter?" was what the latter heard immediately. Sending a wave of hot tears down his face just by the sound of his voice.

"I.. I-" Virgil's voice hitched and stuttered as he tried to answer the question.

"okay, I understand. I'm here, just listen to me, okay?" Logan said over the phone. His voice laced with concern for his boyfriend. "You don't need to tell me what happened until you're ready. Whatever it is I love you, and I always will. Don't ever forget that, now.. Please follow my lead" Logan added, Virgil nodded when needed.

"deep breath in 1, 2, 3 and 4" Virgil did excactly that as Logan firmly counted to a pace he could handle. "now hold.. 1, 2, 3, 4" virgil held his breath, a hand over his mouth to help the process "6, 7.. Virgil, exhale, 1, 2, 3, 4.." Virgil's breath was a struggle to control but he managed.

The pair continued the breathing exercise until Virgil's breath had regulated. The trembling was long gone and the thoughts had faded, tears were now a dry trail of salt down his face. "Lo... Thank you" his voice was weak and tired after the anxiety attack but endearing at the same time.

"Virgil, don't worry about it. I'd be there in a heartbeat if it weren't for the hellish journey to Florida" the pair laughed gently, though the statement was all but false. The journey would be a long one and by the time Logan got to his house it would be the end of the day.. Or the next day.

The couple talked and laughed all through the night before they decided it be best to go to sleep. That night, Virgil felt much better than what that evening had brought him prior to that phone call.

•----Timeskip because I said so----•

Virgil was sat in the living room. A rare sight but his parents were out shopping at that very and was told to stay downstairs as the washing was currently on. He was minding his business, the TV set on YouTube with music blaring at a level that drowned out his neighbors clatter and their children's screaming. Whilst he, himself, was scrolling through tumblr, his safe haven.

That was until he heard a knock on the door. Virgil looked out of the window due to curiosity, keeping the curtains moderately closed as he took a peek to see who it was.... A mailman?

Confused, Virgil stood from his perched spot and headed to the front door, undoing the hatch and opening the door. "Package for uhm-" the mailman checked the name "-Virgil Storm?"

"oh.. Uhm.. Yeah, that's me.." he stammered, more confused on why he had a package.

"okay, here" the mailman handed him the box and started walking away. Perplexed, Virgil stood there for a moment before shutting the door once more and setting down on the couch once more.

Virgil stared at the box in his perched seat, wondering what on earth could be inside. Carefully he rattled the box, it was pretty light and whatever was making the quiet thud inside wasn't that bit either. Maybe packing peanuts were silencing it?

He let out a huff before finally ripping the tape off (with his teeth, naturally. What else is he gonna do? Get a box cutter? No). Once the tape was off he opened the box. Instantly met with the eyes of a medium sized brown bear and a blue stripy tie. Virgil's eyes lit up by the sight as he went to grab it, he was greeted with the overly soft sensation of fur.

Bringing the bear close to his chest he peered into the package once more, finding a card letter. He picked it up. The card was a lilac and with a slight sent of peppermint. That's when he remembered what Logan had told him one day. That he had hand lotion that was peppermint scented, what he had said 'one of my favourite fragrances'. A simple little memory that brought a smile to his face as he realised who had sent this sudden gift his way.

Virgil turned to card and began to read what was written upon the card.

"You can do this..

No matter what the world may bring. Believe in me. Know that I will always be there for you. I may live far but I assure you, I will answer your calls within a heartbeat. (And if not, you may scold me.)

If you may ever require a reminder, please refer to the sophisticated bear.

He will comfort you when I cannot.

Love

- Logan ❤"

Virgil stared down at the card, a smile plastered upon his face. He looked up, glances around before spitting his phone, instantly picking it up and going to the chat that belonged to solely him and his boyfriend.

Virge💜:

Hey Lo!

Lo, heyhey!

Hello!

Hi,,?

You online?

Can I scold you?

Lo✨💙:

Scold me?

Virge💜:

Yeah,, you are the one that sent this bear.. Right?

Lo✨💙:

Yes, of course. I merely forgot I added that.

But, please don't my messages a slightly delayed.

Virge💜:

Suuuure~

Lo✨💙:

Well, I believe you contacted me regarding the gift I sent your way.

Do you like it?

Virge💜:

Of course I do,, it's perfect

Thank you,,

Lo✨💙:

I'm glad you like it. I meant every word.

Even the scolding part.

Virge💜:

Srsly? XD

Welp, I'll be abusing that factor.

Don't leave me alone too long XD

Lo✨💙:

Of course.

Virge💜:

Wanna call?

Logan smiled on his side before pressing the video call button. The call immediately being accepted on the other side. The couple talked for as long as they could until Virgil's parents came home. The break between that call and the next wasn't long as Virgil wasn't needed for that long.

It's safe to say, Virgil loves the bear. Ensuring it's always in the bed when he sleeps. In his arms when he starts to panic or simply when he's thinking of the one he loves.

Tag list:

@fire-and-ash67 @im-actually-ok @wintersandsunshine @bee-mouth-owam

Ask to be added or taken off, please.

#romantic analogical #analogical #logan x virgil #virgil x logan #anxiety x logic #virgil sanders #logan sanders #hurt/comfort #tw crying #tw anxiety attack #fluff

[nightmaretyrantvantas]

The Journey for Mew part 1: The horrifying beginning

Well here we go! The start of a fic series for my recently posted sander sides pokemon au, which was inspired by @sugarglider9603‘s pokemon au

This is gonna start angsty, turn to a slightly thrilling adventurous hurt and comfort, and will have a happy ending I promise! 

A trigger warning for the begining: Theres cursing, fighting(pokemon battling counts in this category right?) and slight mentions of blood, and injuries.

This is also going to be my first full series with a planned ending so I hope its good!

Also to establish this now each of the boys specialize in different pokemon types

Thomas: Normal/water(plus his team is all eeveelutions) Roman: Fire Patton: Fairy/some psychic Logan: Psychic/steel Virgil: ghost/dark Deceit: Bug/ ground Remus: Dark/poison

Now lets get started shall we? ( this one is long to buckle in)

It all started that one fated, horrible winter night. Of course the night itself hadnt started horrible.

It had been a quiet night on the Sander Sanctuary grounds when Virgil slipped out of the shared farm house and started walking towards the east side of the property, and towards the darkened office building a little ways from the house. He took in a deep breath of the crisp night air, smiling as he watched his breath’s smoke dissipate while he walked. Virgil didnt have any job duties or training sessions the next day so he decided he’d stay up that night to spend time with the sanctuary’s dark and ghost pokemon. As he walked through the grass, eyes adjusting to the dim moonlight and scattered lanterns that dotted the property and its pathways, he couldnt help but smile more. Sitting on his shoulders chittering happily was his trusted partner Banette, the doll pokemon’s zipper grin wide and cheerful. Sally had always been a brave cheerful pokemon, a contrast to her trainer’s shyer, anxious nature. 

“ You excited to play with all your friends Sally?”Sally, affectionately named after a character in one of his favorite movies, nodded her head and waved her arms in her excitement. Virgil chuckled and tried to dodge getting smacked. 

“ Ghas?” “ Gastly!!” He paused as three young Gastly floated around him happily, cheering at his presence. As they did Sally hopped to the ground and was immediately swarmed by a group of shuppets, giggling as she was nuzzled and blepped. Virgil’s smile widened and he patted one of the Gastly as he was also nudged and avoided their playful licks.

“ hehe h-hey guys im happy to see you all to-aaaaaaah!” He flailed his arms as he fell back when A large Gengar popped up in front of his with its arms up, being caught mid fall by strong rough hands. He leaned his head back and let out an exasperated sigh at the sight of a familiar grinning Trevenant, it’s laugh echoing out of its mouth soon joined by the Gengar’s giggling. He stood back up and regained his balance, hands on his hips at the two pranksters.

“ Ha ha ha. Very funny you two, you got me.” Then he ruffled Gengar’s fur and patted Trevenant’s head. 

Gengar was one of the older ghost pokemon, one of the eldest to live at the Sanctuary if Virgil remembered correctly. He’d been a Haunter when Thomas had been bequeathed the property from his grandfather and he and thomas had moved onto it and started cleaning it up and he’d been there with them through everything, playing harmless pranks and helping out. Virgil had befriended and grown close to the pokemon, even as it stayed happily wild in the east woods of the property with its best friend Trevenant, who he had helped nurse back to health from a Phantump. The two followed at his side as he kept walking, more ghost and dark pokemon gathering and happily playing around him perfectly at ease with the ghost trainer’s presence. Some even welcomed it as younger pokemon poked and tugged at his pants and jacket to get him to chase them and play tag. He indulged the kids, making them squeal and him laugh. A few feet away from the back of the office building he could see a light shining in a back room, signifying Logan was still awake and working despite it nearing midnight. He could also see pokemon peering into the window curiously, watching the older trainer work. He sighed and started crossing the distance to the building, deciding he’d try to urge Logan to go to bed. Unlike himself Logan had other work in the morning, and he didnt need to be an insomniac too. As he walked his Espeon caught up and trotted beside him contently with a yawn. He reached down and ruffled his fur. “You could’ve stayed in bed you weirdo.” His Espeon gave him an incredulous look and Virgil shrugged. Things were peaceful, and happy.

If only that could’ve last...

He felt the shift in the air, everything suddenly feeling tenser or charged. At first he thought it was simply his paranoia rearing its head, and he looked up towards the looming shadow of Geolite mountain up towards the top of the valley, and the way the moon seemed to touch the summit, almost cradled by it. There was a branch snap and his head whipped towards the fence, and the darkness beyond it. With narrowed eyes Virgil started approaching, hearing something like whispering.

“ Houndoom use shadow ball!” His eyes widened and he scrambled back as a shadow ball hit the fence and destroyed a good chunk of it with a loud boom. He had to cover his ears and he heard the pokemon start scattering or hiding behind him. When his ears stopped ringing he looked towards the smoked mangled fence in horror, stomach twisting into knots. THen he looked beyond it and he felt cold.

Shadowed sillouettes with almost glowing red R’s blazened on their chests were approaching with pokemon, streetlights flickering.

Team Rocket. 

Virgil had always feared this might happen, that word of their pokemon haven would reach people like Giovanni and they’d be attacked for rare pokemon. With kids unknowingly spreading rumors and legends of legendaries visiting and living at the sanctuary, it was a terrifying possibility. But Virgil didnt have time to think about it, or to think of anything really.

“ Houndoom flamethrower!” 

Because the next thing he knew there was a large unrelenting spray of flames rushing straight for him and the pokemon behind him uncaring. Virgil didnt think, instead his body move and he squeezed his eyes shut as he tried to block as many pokemon as he could, as if his body and his body alone would completely shield them from any harm. In a single moment in the distance he thought he heard a wailing cry fainting pierce the night.

There were legends in the Floria region that they lived in that if you heard Giratina’s cry while you were out at night, it was a signal that you or someone else was about to die. It was a legend Logan loved debating and it was one Virgil had always taken with a grain of salt before.

It was Giratina’s enraged cry that pierced the air that night.

As the cry faded Virgil realized he wasnt burning to a crisp but it was still bright he opened his eyes and looked up.

And he was horrified.

Before him, blocking the name fading flames was a small pink pokemon floating in the air as a protective bubble of pink finished shattering around it. Mew’s body was covered in burns and tears started burning in his eyes as it then wobbled and fluttered towards the ground, virgil just barely managing the catch the injuried pokemon. He cradled the legendary in his arms in a panic, watching the poor thing’s shallow breathing as it keened softly, eyes barely open.

“ No no no no nonononononononoo.....” At once Mew’s tail touched his forehead and imaged flashed through his mind.

The mountain

The heart of the mountain

A natural spring of gentle glowing water in a cavern of light bouncing crystals 

Placing Mew in the spring

Healing. A place to heal Mew.

“ Aha the rumors are true! There are legendaries here! Mr. Giovanni is going to be thrilled! Grab the Mew and any other pokemon you can and get rid of the stupid trainer if he gets in the way!” He glared at the grunts as they started approaching closer, holding Mew closer as it shut its eyes tiredly. In front of him his Espeon and Sally stood defensively, both growling. But they were out numbered by a long shot. Lights were turning on in the house but it would be too late if he didnt do something. But if he got too close they’d take Mew and he’d never get it back to the mountain. But if he ran the pokemon would be raided and captured and hurt. 

“ Sally Shadow ball! Anxie used Psybeam!! Keep them away!” Both pokemon attacked and suddenly there was a barage of shadow balls and other attacks that knocked a bunch of the intruders back. Ghost and dark pokemon, including his own, charged forward in a rage, engaging the intruder’s pokemon in battle and trying to push them back and away from Virgil. He saw his two trusted buddies and the gengar that trusted him surrounded, and felt his vision go red when he saw grunts eyeing them and appraoching with nets and collars. They were going to take his friends. They were NOT taking his friends and they were not hurting the pokemon. He stood shakily and heard yelling. He could see Deceit rushing towards him from the house and Logan rushing out of the office confused and horrified. But Team Rocket was coming back onto the property, eyes locked on the pokemon in his arms. He had to do something quick before they all got hurt. Both of the others saw his mouth move with words unheard before he wrapped mew in his thick jacket and he rushed forward, tossing the jacket bundle to Deceit and charged forward recklessly. He let out his own angry cry as he sprinted, and the grunt the was about to lunge for his precious Sally looked up.

Just in time to see the black gloved fist that slammed into his face seconds later. He fell back and wasnt able to see the boot covered foot swing up and kick him away from the chest. He caught the humans around him by surprise and his body was illuminated by the nearby streetlight as he lunged and yanked one of their houndooms back as it readied another flamethrower towards his friends and winced as it grazed his arm. But adrenaline was flowing and he barely noticed as he shoved it back and fought back against the other grunts that started ganging up on him. 

Virgil fought back with everything he had, and he was winning too. The light flickered again. There was another yell.

Then he felt the taser rod before he saw it.

In that moment the world seemed to slow, his scream of pain as his vision flashed white seemed to cut the air in half. His vision started going dark and he felt weightless even as he crumpled to the ground, and the last things he heard was Giratina’s louder, enraged cry, and the wail of multiple pokemon, almost as if they were crying

Or it was a war cry.

“ VIRGIL!!!!!!!” Logan almost screamed when he saw his friend drop to the floor like a ragdoll into a heap under the spotlight. He started running forward as more booms and ground tremors almost knocked him over. The once dark night was now morbidly lighting up with fire coming from the west side past the house, and he could hear more yelling of his housemates over the sound of angry and panicking pokemon. He didnt want to believe he heard the impossible sound of Giratina’s cry but there was no time to think about that.

His eyes were on virgil as he screamed his name and tried to run through battles. But before he could even get close his body was grabbed by psychic forces and yanked back. He yelped and struggled against his Alazakam’s power. 

“ Alakazam! What are you doing?! Let me go! I have to help Virgil!” The pokemon shook its head and held him close. It was then he felt the ground begin shaking under his feet. In the sparking, flickering streetlight the grunt that had taken Virgil down stumbled back in fear. Beneath Virgil’s unmoving form a shadow was growing and swirling around him, growing more and more and anger radiating from it. For a brief moment Logan thought he saw bright teal eyes flash in that inky darkness as a low growl sounded. 

In that moment Logan had the realization that perhaps the silly urban legends and rumors the kids in town whispered, myths that anyone who messes with or hurts the sanctuary and those who work in it invoke the wrath of the legendary pokemon, had more stock in them then he ever gave them credit for.

And then hell broke loose with one last, almost ear ringingly close enraged wail filled the air and the ground shook with some kind of impact.

A shadow ball whizzed past his ear and he was yanked back as his metagross got in front of his protectively and casted a protect around them. 

Within that moment four major things happened at once.

The woods bursted with furious and battle ready ghost and dark pokemon as they charged towards the grunts that attacked Virgil, Sally leading the charge with an war cry and tears in her pinkish red eyes. 

On the west side of the house there was screaming and yelling as Roman and Patton both fought and tried to protect the pokemon and put out the fires as well as fighting off another wave of intruders, Roman’s ranger styler lit up and active as he tried to keep grunts away from the more vulnerable grass pokemon being attacked. 

Near the woods he caught a brief glimpse of Deceit cradling the jacket bundle in his arms, barely catching his face before he suddenly disappeared into thin air and a furious Dusknior was in his place before charging into battle itself.

And there was screaming and angry yelling from near the front and he caught glances of thomas and his team of eeveelutions defending the nursery part of the house and keeping grunts back, and glimpses of a bloodied Remus full out charging and attacking grunts, knocking them down with his fists and feet with a wild look on his face. Everything was chaotic and Logan struggled more, pleading with his protective pokemon to let him go, let him out and go help his loved ones. But then he took a chance to calm down, take a shaky breath, and stood up straight.

“ Lets go.” 

Things blurred for Logan after that. He could remember being freed. Could remember running along side the battling pokemon with Lucario at his side.

He remembered the yelling and wailing and pokemon cries and running through battles.

He remembered stumbling through the thick darkness towards Virgil’s form and cradling the lanky boy in his arms. 

He vaguely remembered Team Rocket being forced back more and more and soon after retreating and being run off by Remus and a barage of pissed off pokemon. 

He remembered crying and yells of his name as he tried to wake him up. 

He also remembered long wails of despair and the gagging reek of smoke and the darkness around him and Virgil slipping away and rising, a dark clawed hand reaching towards his face placatingly.

‘ He will live, but now, you both must sleep....’

And then there was darkness as Logan slumped forward into Darkrai’s embrace, everything fading away  as his eyes fell shut......

The same kind of darkness Deceit was surrounded by as he crashed into the ground and found himself far from his endangered home with mew tucked in his arms looking up the looming mountain he stood at the base of....

And thats the end of part 1! I warned you guys it would be angsty! dont worry itll get better....eventually...

Regardless I hope you guys like part 1 and look forward to part 2!!!

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#my writing #sander sides #sander sides au #sander sides writing #sander sides fanfiction #pokemon au #sander sides pokemon au #sander sides angst #thomas sanders #character thomas #roman sanders #virgil sanders #virgil angst #patton sanders #logan sanders #deceit sanders #remus sanders

[damienthepious]

im. heck. this is long. tuesday???!? aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa. forgive typos i’m RUSHING to get this up before i have to leave for work.

Scattered On My Shore (Chapter 14)

[Ch 1] [Ch 2] [Ch 3] [Ch 4] [Ch 5] [Ch 6] [Ch 7] [Ch 8] [Ch 9] [Ch 10] [Ch 11] [Ch 12] [Ch 13] [ao3] [Ch 15] [Ch 16] [Ch 17] [Ch 18] [Ch 19]

Fandom: The Penumbra Podcast

Relationship: Lord Arum/Sir Damien/Rilla, Sir Damien/Rilla

Characters: Rilla, Lord Arum, Sir Damien

Additional Tags: Second Citadel, Lizard Kissin’ Tuesday, Pre-Relationship, (for the three of them. it’s established r/d), Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Injury, Injury Recovery, Hurt/Comfort, Slow Burn, (this will also be), Enemies to Lovers, (for damien and arum eventually lol)

Fic Summary: Strange things wash up out of the lake near Rilla’s hut, on occasion. But this monster… this monster is certainly the strangest.

Chapter Summary: A homecoming.

Chapter Notes: These dang things just keep getting longer, don't they? Also I'm emotional. I'm so fucking emotional. Chapter specific warnings for an explicit threat of violence, not carried through with.

~

Arum insists on coming out to the front room for breakfast the next morning. Saving his strength is all well and good, but if Arum need be confined to that little bed for the entire time between now and their departure, he will certainly not make it that far. Amaryllis was right, that day he attempted escape. At least the view out there is different, and- well. He is comfortable in the room with the cot, by now, but it is far less clinical in Amaryllis' living space. It makes him feel less of a patient and more… more of a guest. Which he should not care about, of course.

Amaryllis relents rather quickly on the subject, provided that he agree to pick a spot and stick to it, until the evening. She is overly concerned with him, not quite paranoid but certainly delving into the territory of what Arum is comfortable referring to as fretting. She scowls when he calls it that, which is gratifying, but it also appears to make her more conscious of how delicate she is being with him, and she rolls her eyes at herself before she helps to lift him to his feet, shuffling slowly out to the table.

Amaryllis and Sir Damien keep their hands clasped between them throughout their breakfast together. Seems inconvenient, Arum thinks, pulling his eyes away from the easy way their fingers interlace. They do not have an overabundance of limbs to work with. Surely they should not impede themselves for such a- a pointless gesture.

They are-

Arum cannot say what, precisely, it is, but he feels as if something is strange between the pair of them. Or- or perhaps that something had been strange, and has now settled. They are sitting closer, and something about their proximity feels… easier. Sir Damien, in particular, seems more calm, though Amaryllis still has a layer of nervous energy to her.

Of course, Amaryllis is not particularly patient. She does not hold the tension inside of her for long, after they have finished eating.

"So," Amaryllis says, and Arum frowns instantly. "So… Damien is gonna be- coming with us for the trip."

Arum jerks his head to look at the knight, and Damien nods slightly.

"Wh-why?" Arum barks.

"Because… because I want to," Damien says quietly, and then he- smiles, soft and odd, and Arum remembers Damien's hand on his chin, despite himself, "and because I do not think it would be safe for only the pair of you to take that trip. Too many potential dangers, on both sides. I am certain that Rilla has discussed- ah, potential ways to disguise you, so that you will be in less danger from… knights."

Damien's voice has gone soft as well, and Arum can see some strange pain on his face, though Arum cannot say precisely what that indicates. How much separation can this creature feel from his own order?

"But of course that does not mean there will not still be some risk, if…" Damien pauses again. "I would feel better, being there. And… I have my part in this, as well."

"Your part ," Arum echoes. "What do you mean, your part in this?"

Damien pauses for a long moment, clearly considering his words.

"I want to see you home and safe as well, Arum. I have… committed this far. I will follow through."

"Committed?" Arum says. "I hardly think this counts as a commitment. You- you have allowed Amaryllis to- you have denied your duty in slaying me-"

Arum cuts himself off with a wince, then glances toward Amaryllis and away again. Damien does not rise to this statement, does not comment or deny.

It is clear, from the mild confusion on Amaryllis' face, that Damien has not told her the precise shape of what passed between the two of them, the previous day. What Arum nearly pushed Sir Damien to do.

"You…" Arum trails off. "Fine. If you should like to come, I do not see what it will hurt. I shall be curious to see how deep your treachery runs."

"Arum," Rilla warns.

Arum winces again, then sighs and looks away. "It is not as if I could stop you, anyway."

Damien tilts his head. Arum can see it, in his periphery.

"If it would… truly cause you distress, I would… I would worry rather deeply, but I would stay-"

"I said I could not stop you," Arum repeats in a sharp voice. "It is not as if you distress me, songbird, I simply- I do not understand."

"Yes," Damien says softly. "Well. That is… fair. It is a… somewhat complicated situation, is it not? But- but I will take this journey with you, if you allow me."

"I said I could not stop you, honeysuckle,” Arum growls, and judging by Amaryllis’ breath of laughter his tone must be unconvincing. “If that is your choice, that is your choice."

Damien's mouth curls slightly, a smile vague but pleasant, and Arum can't stand to keep his eyes on the pair of them together, though they keep drawing back, regardless.

"Very well. I will accompany you, then."

Arum huffs, wrinkling his snout. "I am surprised that your Citadel can spare you. I thought you creatures were rather strictly kept."

Damien purses his lips, then sighs. "We are… currently in something of a lull, I suppose. There was a thread our Investigator General intended to pull, but… well… when pulled, the pattern simply unraveled. There was a rash of monster attacks with similar stratagems, but they've dissipated like mist over the last… during the last few…" he trails off, his tone going blank. "The… the last few weeks."

Arum feels the twinge in his frill, knows perfectly well he is giving himself away, but Damien does not turn his eyes towards him, accusatory or otherwise.

The pause draws long, and Amaryllis is clearly hovering on the edge of words herself.

"Well?" Arum snaps, eventually. "Are you going to ask or aren't you? Go ahead, then. I told you I made weapons against your kind. What, precisely, were these consistent stratagems you were attempting to ferret out?"

"Arum," Rilla says gently, but Arum scowls more deeply as Sir Damien meets his eyes.

“Well, Sir Damien?”

Damien holds his gaze, for a quiet moment. "There were a number of creatures, in short time, utilizing powers of manipulation. Encouraging conflict, stoking self doubt, provoking pain. Assaulting the mind first, in order to more effectively destroy the body."

"Yes," Arum says in a hiss. "Yes, I am certain I created the creatures of which you speak. I cannot imagine any other could have managed to replicate my work."

"The mushrooms," Rilla murmurs, her brow furrowed. "It was- pain. Illusions of things we- things we were afraid of, things that hurt us."

Arum wishes he could burn the grubs a second time. The look on Amaryllis' face is unbearable, but then she looks up at him, raking her eyes over his face, her expression oddly desperate.

"Yes," he hisses again.

"I…" Damien's face goes mournful as Arum snaps his attention back to the knight. "I cannot say that no harm was done by the creatures, that none were killed. I cannot alleviate your guilt in that way-" Arum scoffs, but he cannot deny, not with the way Damien is looking at him. "But… but I can say that none are doing harm any longer."

Arum looks away, too uncomfortable to pretend otherwise. "If you say so."

"Regardless," Damien continues in a low, measured voice. "As to whether or not I may be spared by the Citadel- while the Investigator General searches for a new loose thread to worry over, the ranks await more specific direction, and-" Damien gives a very small laugh, and the corner of Rilla's mouth pulls into an answering smile. "And I very, very rarely use the time I am granted, for leave. More often than not, I am too worried over the prospect of leaving my fellow knights without assistance. So… none were troubled, that I wished to take my allotted time now, to assist my Rilla."

It is more of an answer than Arum expected. In truth, he had merely been trying to rile the knight again. He huffs out another breath, claws drumming on the table.

"Okay," Rilla says, drawing the word out into more syllables than it requires. "Okay. Uh, that seems settled enough for me, I think. This has been awkward enough for one morning. So, Arum, I, uh-"

She pauses, and Damien squeezes her hand, and Arum hears her breath come steadier, again. She sighs.

"So, I was thinking, we should leave either tomorrow or the day after." She pauses again. "Maybe the day after. You're standing better, and Damien's offered his horse, so- you'll ride, and we'll walk. It'll take longer, but even if we had three horses it probably wouldn't be safe for you to ride at speed anyway, you could jostle something open, or-" She bites her lip. "So. You on the horse, me and Damien walking, and- it'll be slow. What is it, two weeks to your swamp?"

"Something… something to that effect, yes. Though-" he clenches his teeth. "When we are close- we only need reach the border, I think, and we will not need to travel by foot any longer."

"The border. Okay. Okay, and, um, with the route we planned the other day, we should be…" her lips twitch into a smile. "We can do this. We can get you home, and then- ah… I've- I've made up a bunch of extra-"

Her voice- cracks a little, and some pain crosses her face. Arum blinks. He does not understand why she would be…

"For- um. For after I- for after we-" she pauses, inhaling sharply. "I made up a bunch of extra salves, and painkillers, and- and a replacement wrap, so your horn will- so your horn will keep together, and a new cast that should last until your wrist is healed and- so you won't have to worry… when I'm gone."

Arum stares at her, at the odd twisting of her almost-smile. "Ah."

I'm gonna miss him, is the only thing.

Amaryllis' voice on the recorder had been so keening and strange, and it had pulled on Arum's heart like his own yearning for the Keep and- and he could not help but believe her. She is … she is going to miss him. She will feel his absence. Such a terribly strange feeling-

And Arum had been honest, when he told her that he would miss her in return. Though, of course, Arum knows that had not been the whole of it. It is not the whole of it, but he will feel her absence, as well.

"Very…" he swallows. "Very forward thinking of you," he manages. "I… I had no fears, of course. And all I require is home, regardless. Seems a shame, I think, to make you waste an entire month ferrying me back and then needing to return. Certainly your other patients will be missing you, with your skill."

"Yeah, well, I may be the best doctor in the Citadel, but I'm not the only doctor in the Citadel. They'll manage." She smiles again, a little less certainly, and Damien squeezes her hand again.

"Do you feel ready enough for the trip, Lord Arum?" Damien asks.

Arum hates the way his own heart turns, slowly, like a key in a lock, every time Sir Damien calls him that. It is ridiculous. It is his name , it does not make sense , but- the way his tone curls around Lord, the way Arum seems to sit at the back of his mouth. Lord Arum. Respectful formality from a knight. It is … strange, that is all. It is still strange.

"I am… as ready as I shall be," he murmurs. "I cannot afford further delay. My swamp, my home, it… it has been…"

"Without its Lord," Damien finishes, gently.

"Yes. My swamp… and my Keep."

Rilla startles slightly, but Arum… Arum does not know why he has bothered to continue concealing the Keep's existence anyway, and Sir Damien has made it… abundantly clear, that his stance has changed. This stiff-spined little human has shifted his footing, has gained a new vantage, as incomprehensible as that seems.

Damien purses his lips, his face going questioning. "Have you… mentioned a Keep before?" He asks. "Or- no. I think- I think you have only nearly mentioned a Keep before."

"Perceptive," Arum grumbles, his tone hovering between irritated and impressed. "Yes. My home, my Keep." He pauses. "I have already explained it to Amaryllis, I do not- I do not feel-"

"You need not explain anything to me, Lord Arum. Home is…" he presses a hand over his heart. Arum hears his breath catch. "All creatures should be blessed with shelter, with home. It is…" he pauses again. "I am certain you will be glad to be returned to yours. We shall do all we can, to make that come to pass for you."

"Yes, well…" Arum glances aside, uncomfortable. "The sooner the better." He clasps his claws in front of himself, then glances towards Amaryllis. "The… the day after tomorrow, you said, Amaryllis. If you think I shall require the extra day."

Amaryllis nods, and Arum does not know what they will do in the interim. He had not been planning, truly, to make it this far. And now he has today, and tomorrow, to worry and wonder about this upcoming trip. To worry and wonder, about the softness of Sir Damien's hand on his chin. About the leaping of his own heart, at the gentleness with which the knight had lifted it. About the prospect of Amaryllis missing him. About all these strange and bitter hungers that have begun to curl within him.

Arum's eyes have found Amaryllis and Sir Damien's clasped hands again, tracking the way that Damien's thumb is brushing soft over the back of it, a slow, comforting rhythm, as Amaryllis' hand squeezes his. Arum's tongue flicks compulsively, and he buries the urge to-

He does not even know. He is not close enough to reach their hands, and what would he do even if he was? Even if he- if he reached out and wrapped his hand around both of their own (his hand is large enough to do so, his fingers longer than theirs, their stubby little mammal things with their blunt nails and their soft brown skin) (Arum knows the softness both of their hands, now), even if he were to do so-

Certainly they would not welcome his intrusion. Certainly not. They are both so eager to see him gone from their lives. And Arum is eager as well, of course, to return to his Keep, to return to his life. He is eager to close the door on this bizarre little chapter-

A lie. Too deep to stand.

He is not eager to close the door on this chapter. He is not ready. Two days. Two days- only two more days in this strange little hut, in this short-ceilinged human construction, full of herb smell and strange baubles and dangerous plants and skillful wordsmithing and a heretical, compassionate little doctor, and her knight.

Arum has never had a place outside of the Keep before, where he felt himself truly safe. Arum's mind is still… halved in a strange way, he still feels the absence of the Keep's thoughts at his edges, still feels where the Keep is meant to fit, where song should shift into… meaning, and affection, and shared memory, and home.

But if Arum could still feel the Keep here, he would be entirely unable to pretend, anymore, that he does not wish there was some way he could stay.

~

Arum intends to finish the translation, before they leave. It will not be difficult, all things considered. The tome is short, the material arranged in no particular order but with consistent notation for the entries, and he is familiar enough with a decent amount of the species listed that it speeds the process considerably. He needs not even attempt to scrawl the information out in his slightly more stilted attempt at human script, now that Amaryllis is in the room with him again. She simply sets her recorder beside him and he speaks as he works, occasionally drifting into conversation rather than translation, or narrowing his eyes at a particular peculiarity of the dialect, the drifting etymology of distance.

When he turns the page and sees the Moonlit Hermit, he freezes. After a moment, he drifts his claws down the page, tracing the single narrow line that depicts the flower's stem.

So small a thing, to cause so much trouble.

"The Moonlit Hermit," he murmurs, and Amaryllis drops a roll of bandages, the white ribboning off as it unrolls across her floor.

He raises an eyebrow as she scrambles to retrieve the roll, laughing awkwardly, and when she straightens she won't meet his eyes for a long moment.

"Amaryllis?"

"Just- forgot that one was in there too."

He tilts his head. "Why does it matter? What is the Hermit to you, then?" he asks, because if the Universe insists on piercing him through to make a point-

"My- my parents were researching it. It was a big part of their research, actually- the Hermit, what it could do- the potential it had-"

Arum frowns, automatically, remembering the particular results he had pulled from the potential of the Hermit in his possession.

"I've- I've been trying to… to find one," she says, her voice gone small, and Arum forces himself not to stare at her, at the longing on her face. He looks to the book, instead.

"I am afraid there is very little on the subject in this particular volume, Amaryllis," he says, gently, and she sighs.

"That… yeah, I kind of expected that. I couldn't read it, but- I could tell the entry was short. Shorter than most of the other ones, at least."

"It mentions the unnatural fragility of the stem," he murmurs, tracing his claw along the lettering. "Five pale petals, the glow of moonless night, the utter incongruity… hm," he traces the shape of the drawing on the paper again, remembering. "Volumes of this sort so rarely bother to note the sounds. It chimes, as well, at contact or in use. It is not the most beautiful song I have ever heard, but… it suits. Cool, and delicate."

He realizes, after a pause, that Amaryllis is staring at him. He pulls his eyes from the book, wary at her uncertain gaze.

"What?"

"You… you've heard it? You've- you've seen one. Arum- Arum, you've seen a Moonlit Hermit?" She sets her medical bag aside, her packing entirely forgotten. "Arum, please, you have to tell me where I can- how- I have to see it. I have to- to-"

His heart sinks, the hope in her voice too unfortunate to stand. "If it still existed, Amaryllis… I would certainly think it fair payment for the service you have provided me, but- it was destroyed." He pauses, sighs. "I destroyed it."

"You-" she looks too stunned to be properly furious, but Arum suspects that will come soon enough. " What?"

"Those who attacked me," he says softly, "desired to take it for themselves. To use it. Just as I had been using it, of course, to create weapons against your kind." He pauses, exhales. "I wish I could say, Amaryllis, that it had been a choice made of morality, but- I did not yet know you. I- there are many things I did not yet know, when I…" he traces the shape of the petals again, one, two, three, four, five, and his lip curls in an almost smile. "I ensured that our meeting occurred in daylight, as insurance. It was easy enough, when I realized I had been betrayed, to lift so fragile a thing into the light."

"Arum-"

"Spite. I destroyed the Hermit in spite, Amaryllis, because I knew they intended to kill me, and I did not want to give them the satisfaction of beating me, as well. Of taking what I rightfully found. I threw myself into the river for the sake of that same spite. I would rather drown than let them slit my throat, so…"

She is touching his shoulder, now. He does not look at her.

"I do not regret my actions. The Hermit could have… would have done some good, in your hands, of that I am certain, but… I am glad it was destroyed, rather than be misused again. Rather than being twisted to further bloodshed."

Her hand on his shoulder lifts, and she almost touches his face. Almost. He keeps his eyes safely away.

After a breath, she drops the hand, and turns, and returns to her packing. Arum feels his stomach twisting, regret and shame, fear, desire, all of it colliding together within him like a collapsing building, but still he does not look. He breathes and breathes until he is certain that his voice will not shake, and then he turns the page, and resumes his translation.

~

It feels as if Arum simply blinks, and two full days have passed. Sir Damien wakes before dawn, and Arum, his nerves sharp and heightened, wakes at his careful noise, at the click of the door behind him as he goes outside to run through his routine.

Amaryllis wakes not long after, throwing together a quick sort of breakfast and quietly going through a checklist of their supplies before she comes to, in theory, wake him.

She smiles, clearly unsurprised when she finds him already awake, already digging his claws into the sheets, and the smile stays as she helps him to his feet.

She wraps him in layers. A simple strategy, but simplicity is more reliable than the delicacy of complication, in Arum's experience. He keeps the cape on beneath the rest, and she smiles when she is done wrapping the rest around him. He can see the crooked shape of it through the sheer scarf covering his face.

And then, for the first time since he woke in Amaryllis’ hut, he steps outside.

Arum does not want to look back, to acknowledge the finality of walking away from this hut, of stepping up into the saddle and riding away from this shelter, riding back towards his true home.

He does not wish to look back.

Rather- he wishes that he did not want to.

He turns despite himself as Amaryllis adjusts the robes that hide his scales, ensuring that his tail is hidden as he curls it around his own ankle. He does not mean to, but he turns, and-

It looks so much smaller, from the outside. Squat and friendly and warm, with flowering vines curling familiar across trellises and a clean little herb garden and the mossy stump where Damien likes to sit and compose when he is finished with his exercises, and the curtained window Arum knows the shape of so terribly well, from the other side.

So many days. So very long, he has spent in such a small, strange space. And now-

He cannot imagine that he will ever see it again.

Arum is almost grateful for the ridiculous layers. At least neither of the humans can see the way his face twists, as his heart lurches with the grief of parting.

~

They travel light; there’s not much they need to take with them. Rilla keeps her medical bag, of course, in case of emergencies or in case the traveling impedes Arum’s recovery in some way, along with her bag of extra supplies she's gonna leave with him when they get him back home. Damien pretty much just has his armor, his bow, and his usual traveling supplies: bedroll, rations, canteen, et cetera. Arum has nothing to bring, obviously. Nothing except for his mended cape, which is wrapped secure around his shoulders beneath the rest of his mild disguise. Rilla covered him in strategic layers, scarves and shawls and large loose pants that collectively obscure his form and face as he sits sideways in the saddle of Damien’s horse, who only required minimal acclimating to adjust to the weight of a monster. Currently, Arum looks enough like an excessively ill person swaddled like an infant, or like a particularly old-fashioned noble, and hopefully they won’t need to do much by the way of explanation on the less-traveled roads they intend to use.

It’s slow going, of course. Anything more than the lightest movement could be a risk for Arum; jostling around on top of a horse isn’t exactly healthy for healing stab and slash wounds, obviously.

Every time they pass another group, Damien looks like he’s about to be sick, face twisting in a completely unconvincing smile and his voice going high and reedy if he tries to greet them. Rilla does most of the talking, for a change, and Arum sits tense and stiff and dignified astride the horse, and occasionally nods through his scarves at whomever happens to be passing by.

Nights are more difficult. They need to wander far from the road to set up camp, and they need to obscure the fire on one side to make it more difficult to see from where they came, to avoid other eyes, and they wait until it is safely dark every night before Arum can remove his layers of disguise and sigh in the open air again. He always keeps his cape safely draped around his shoulders after the rest has been left in a pile nearby, a claw curled along the edge of the fabric as he settles close and warm by the fire.

He’s tired , Rilla can tell. The travel on top of his recovery, and the constant strain of worry that comes from the threat of discovery- it’s no wonder, really. She wishes she could make this easier for him, wishes she could just snap her fingers and have him home to his Keep, but- this is the best she can do, for now. She’ll get him home, long way around or no.

~

"Sir Damien."

They are preparing to resume their travel in the morning, Damien packing the last of their supplies back up from their makeshift camp while Rilla tends to Damien's horse, and Arum is wrapped already in his layers as they wait for Rilla to return, to help Arum back into the saddle for the day. Damien glances down at the obscured monster, lips pursing nervously, but he does not think the monster is looking back at him. It is difficult to tell, with the layers, but Damien thinks that Arum is looking towards Rilla again.

"Yes, Lord Arum?"

He continues to stare for a moment, and then Arum glances away. His voice comes even quieter, then. "We are still close to your Citadel, little knight," he murmurs. "There is still time between us and my home, and many opportunities for this expedition to fall apart."

"Pessimism will not help the situation, Lord Arum," Damien says mildly.

"Perhaps not. But pragmatism-" he pauses, sighs. "If the worst is to happen, if I am discovered along this mad little journey… Amaryllis must not be seen as guilty for helping a monster. I refuse to have her suffer for this absurd kindness."

Damien pauses, his heart doing a swooping little flip, and he looks at Arum again in disbelief. "What-"

"If we are discovered, they must believe that I forced her to treat me, forced her to escort me home. They must believe that she was made to do it, that I threatened or coerced or- she must not be seen a traitor for my sake. Do you understand me, Sir Damien?"

Damien presses a hand over his heart, presses as hard as the thudding pressing out. He forces his breath to come steady enough for words, just for one sentence. "Rilla would not be happy, with that particular deception," he rasps, looking at his fiance through the rosy morning light.

"That," Arum says with a growl, "is precisely why I am asking you, and not the doctor herself. I trust that you will protect her. I know that you will."

Damien wishes so dearly that he could see the monster's face, just now. That he could see the look in his violet eyes.

"Honeysuckle," Arum says quietly, roughly. "Tell me that I am correct."

"This- this is not like the other day, is it? This is not more of the same, again, more of you trying to- to-"

"This is not an act of self destruction, honeysuckle." Arum stares up at him, or at least, Damien assumes that is the direction the monster is aiming his eyes. "But she must be safe."

Damien inhales, exhales, inhales.

"Rilla would never forgive me, if I caused you to be hurt in her stead. You must know that, Lord Arum."

The monster clenches his hands, his head ducking just slightly. "It is more important that she be alive, to forgive you or not." He turns his head a little further away, then, his voice going even quieter. "Of course she will forgive you, little fool. She loves you."

Damien's throat goes tight and hot and uncomfortable, his heart thrumming and thrumming, and the words boil within him but he cannot say-

Do you think I do not know that you love her as well? Can you not see that she loves you in return?

His lips part, he is going to say something too foolish for their unspoken understanding to survive, but-

Rilla is returning.

Arum's shoulders go stiff, and before she is in hearing distance he mutters, "I must trust that you will do what is right, Sir Damien."

Damien breathes slow, summoning tranquility as best he can, listening to the drumming of his own heart, and he knows that he will. He will do what is right, even if that is not the same as what Arum has asked of him.

~

Rilla is fairly bored on the road. She can't read effectively while walking, and they only have the one horse. She can only glean so much amusement out of cataloging the wildlife as they pass it by, but Damien knows her far too well to let her boredom sit. He starts reciting as they travel, spinning stories, sharing newer compositions, weaving tales in the air between them, accompanied by jungle noises and the hum of insects.

Rilla sings, as well, when Damien's poor voice needs a rest, and she pretends not to notice when she starts a song and Arum stiffens in recognition. Pretends even harder not to notice when he hums along, when he harmonizes in his low, careful voice. She pretends, poorly, not to grin in delight, the smile tipping her singing voice even brighter.

If she didn't feel like she was riding off to break her own stupid, stupid heart, this would be the most fun she's had on a trip in ages.

~

Unnatural quiet in the jungle dark, and Sir Damien comes awake with the fingers of one hand already gripped on his bow, a strange and familiar rushing in his ears.

He remembers where he is without strain. He can feel the dirt beneath him through the bedroll, can feel Rilla close beside him, can hear her breathing light.

He can hear little else besides. A stillness hangs in the night air, and Damien feels it. He feels attack waiting, can taste tension on the air. He can almost hear the source. Almost.

Damien breathes slow. Panic is a faraway thing, just now. A faraway thing that cannot possibly touch him. The rushing in his ears has gone slowly rhythmic, and Damien waits, Damien waits, Damien waits for the precise moment. For the strike. For his parry.

His heart. Rilla's breath. The rustle of leaf and soil. The padding, just low, of paws. Damien tenses, poised and prepared and waiting, waiting for just the right moment-

"If you take one… single… step… closer," says a low, guttural, growling voice, and Sir Damien realizes after a startled breath that he recognizes it. He recognizes the voice, because it belongs to Lord Arum, though it has been pitched dangerous as it echoes strange and placeless among the trees. "If you take just one more step… I will make a meal of your entrails while you still live."

There is a pause, a stillness deeper, even, than the one which came before it.

"Do not test me," Arum continues, dark and certain. "These creatures are not yours to hunt."

Another pause. Slowly, slowly, the sense of danger recedes. The night noises of the jungle resume in its absence, the whine of insects and the rustle of small creatures, and Damien knows they are safe again.

Damien has never heard Lord Arum sound quite like that, before. Dark. Dangerous. Protective. And Damien does not feel an ounce of fear, at that voice, though his heart is thudding hot.

Not yours to hunt.

Not yours, he said. Does that mean, then, that Arum considers them his?

Another long pause draws out in the darkness as Damien tries to shake the memory of Arum's voice, as he feels the gooseflesh shiver across his skin, and then there is a noise, shifting close by.

"You are awake, aren't you, honeysuckle?"

Arum's voice no longer sounds strange. It no longer echoes oddly, and the venom is gone from it, leaving the monster sounding only soft, murmuring through the black of night.

"Yes," Damien whispers.

"I did not intend to wake you," Arum hisses.

"You did not," Damien says, just as low. "I… I felt that something was wrong. I woke before you… scared the creature away. Will it return, do you think?"

"Certainly not," Arum drawls, gently. "We are close to my territory now, little songbird, and I know the sorts of scavengers that prowl my borders. I know a coward when I smell one," he hisses. "She expected an easy meal. That, we most certainly are not. She will not try again."

"How…" Damien needs to pause, to swallow. "How did you know I was awake?"

"Your breathing shifted… your heartbeat. I can hear them both from here."

It is difficult, for Damien, not to feel exposed, knowing that. He is certain that his heart is still beating hard. Harder, now.

"And… and did you slip into the trees, to frighten the creature away? I will be compelled to tell Rilla if you exerted yourself while she slept-"

"I did not budge an inch, honeysuckle. Don't be foolish."

Damien blinks, for all the good it does him. The bare hint of stars between the canopy above flickers, just for a moment. "But- but your voice, Arum," he murmurs, and when Arum chuckles low Damien can feel heat pooling odd in his stomach. "You sounded as if…"

"As if I could be anywhere," Arum murmurs , and his voice echoes again, placeless, but close and worrying. "Yes … I told you, honeysuckle, that I had some skill, some tricks up my sleeves…"

Even more worrying than Arum's voice itself: the way the low heat of it makes the answering heat in Damien's stomach pulse.

"A-Arum," Damien whispers, and he releases his grip on his bow, reaching into the dark instead, grasping in the direction that Arum's voice had seemed to come from, for those few words where he had sounded ordinary again. "Where… where are you?"

There is a brief pause, a more gentle laugh in the dark.

"I am close enough to pluck you, still, little honeysuckle," he says in a rumble that rolls down Damien's spine, and he cannot help the way his breath catches, his eyes darting in the darkness as he tries to pin Arum's place. "Have no fear." Another laugh, even warmer. "Unless… unless my proximity is what worries you, of course."

"Arum," Damien breathes, reaching his hand our further.

"I'm here," Arum hisses. "I forget the limitations of your senses. I can see you, blue as you are in the starlight. Can you truly not see me?"

"I…" Damien swallows roughly, feeling Rilla warm beside him, feeling the coolness of the dirt beneath him, knowing that this monster is somewhere, so close by, watching him through the dark. Damien shakes his head, testing.

"How interesting," Arum murmurs, and his voice is still bouncing strange, as if it could be coming from the whole of the jungle itself.

A pause drags out, then, and Damien grasps, feeling across the scattered leaves, towards where Arum's bedroll should be.

Arum's hand intercepts his own, and when the monster laughs soft again, he sounds only close, only ordinary again. "I told you, honeysuckle. I am here."

"Arum," Damien whispers, the texture of scales so strange against his palm, and Arum pulls his hand closer, touching it to- to his cheek, Damien imagines, and he can feel the rumbling of his throat and the rumbling of his voice as he speaks again.

"I did not budge an inch," he hisses again, and Damien can feel him speaking, even as his voice echoes in the canopy above.

Damien can barely focus on the fascination he feels at that, though, because the reality of Arum's face in his hand, again- the reality of the monster laying so close beside them in the dark- it is twisting so- so-

So pleasantly, within him. Damien's mouth has gone dry.

"Go back to sleep, honeysuckle," Arum murmurs, his voice gone quiet and normal again, and he squeezes Damien's hand as he moves it away from his face again. "Go back to sleep. We are safe, I assure you."

Damien believes him instantly. Damien believed him the first time, when he insisted the other monster would not return. He knows that they are safe, that the three of them together are more dangerous than anything the wilds could possibly assail them with.

"Are you certain?" he asks again, regardless, because his heart is racing and he knows that Arum can hear it, and certainly he requires this excuse for the pounding rhythm, and for the way he has not pulled his hand away from Arum's.

Arum has not pulled his hand away, either.

"We are safe," Arum repeats in a hiss. "I promise. Go back to sleep, Damien."

Damien squeezes his eyes shut, despite the dark, hoping that Arum is no longer looking at his face, that he cannot see Damien's expression in the dark.

Damien pretends that he has forgotten their hands, clasped together. He steadies his own breathing, pretends not to feel his own heat permeating Arum's hand, and-

And Arum does not pull his hand away, either.

Arum does not pull his hand away. Not before Damien falls back asleep in truth, at least.

~

The rumors are true, apparently.

They can see it in the distance when they round the crest of a hill, a gap in the canopy of trees above the road giving them a decent look towards the swamp in the distance that is apparently Arum’s home.

The swamp that is also, apparently, creeping outward.

They can see outcroppings of new-grown swamp greenery that stands out among the wider jungle, pushing past the usual border between the two, and even at this distance Rilla can see the speckling of purple from the blooms that give the swamp its name as well, and from this perspective the growth looks like curling fingers, reaching out.

Searching, Rilla thinks. A desperate hand, combing through the jungle to look for the missing ruler currently bundled up on the horse behind her. She glances back towards him, and even hidden behind the layers of cloth she can see the tension in his frame, can feel the impatient energy radiating from him.

“Almost there,” she says, and he tilts his head down towards her with a sharp breath. “Not much farther, now.”

He nods, and she sees him hesitate for only a moment before his eagerness gets the better of him.

“If one of those- those outgrowths is close enough, we should aim for it. We may be afforded a shortcut. Save further time,” he hisses quietly, and that’s pretty confusing but Rilla nods in response. He knows this place better than she does, after all.

Damien holds his own tongue for a moment before he points out one in particular, a vivid purple growth curling out, and quietly suggests a path they could take in that direction, a smaller road that should take them close.

Arum grows more and more agitated as they make their approach, and they all notice at the same moment that the outgrowths aren't the only strange thing about the swamp's border, nor are they the only new growth. She understands belatedly why the border was so easy to see from a distance-

There is a wall. The foliage on the edge is tightly packed, unnaturally so, the trees interwoven with newer saplings and quick vines, an enormous wicker boundary spotted with bright splotches of poisonous plants (Rilla can tell, even at this distance). Arum picks up a low growl, compulsive and continuous, and Rilla clenches her hands tight but she doesn't warn him against the noise. She doubts any other humans would be coming this close while the swamp is doing… whatever this is, and honestly, she can't blame him for the distress.

He's practically snarling to himself by the time they reach the border, his tail thrashing noticeably beneath his layers, and Rilla's stomach gives a sympathetic twist as Damien carefully, carefully helps Arum lower himself from the saddle.

"Okay," Rilla says. "Obviously this is… less than ideal."

"An understatement, Amaryllis. Look at- look at this! What- what could it possibly-" he gestures sharply towards the wall, then hisses in pain and draws the limb back to himself.

Damien makes a worried noise, an arm still supporting the monster as he fidgets, growling low, and then he eyes the wall with a considering look. "Hm. Perhaps I will close the borders entirely," Damien murmurs, and Rilla doesn't understand his words or his tone until he looks to Arum again. "I think you said that, when I asked what you intended to do when you returned home. It seems that others had similar thoughts, in your absence, Lord Arum."

Arum scoffs, then gently pushes himself from Damien's grip, standing straighter on his own, stiff and strained. "Foolishness. Ridiculous," he mutters as he starts to pull the layers off, unwinding scarves from his neck. "All this will do is draw undue attention-"

The sound of wings above compels Damien to draw his bow instantly, and his eyes dart to the foliage above more quickly than Rilla can follow, fixing on the source, the wide wingspan and gleaming threat of talons as they descend, and Damien's stance tightens, drawing the string more taut-

"Wait- stop-"

At Arum's choking cry Damien's poise falters, his aim going wide, the arrow finding purchase in the wicker wall instead of the quickly dropping- thing-

Arum tears the hood from his head, tears the last of the layers off beside his cape, his frill flaring and a grin curving his mouth, and he makes a strange warbling call, clear and loud and near to birdsong, and the wings above startle, fluttering sharp, and then there is an answering cry before the shape descends even faster.

"Arum-"

"Lord A-"

Arum nearly falls as the feathered shape collides with him, but he is laughing, now, as he makes more of those strange noises, and Rilla finally manages to parse exactly what the hell just happened, because there is an enormous heron shuffling from one taloned foot to the other on top of Arum's shoulders, shoving its beaked face into Arum's horns and squawking in a way that sounds both irritable and excited.

"Yes- foolish thing," Arum breaks into another laugh, and then into another strange warble as he lifts a hand to gently push the beaked face from pecking at the edge of his frill. "Obviously. Of course I did. Of course I did, you little- did you doubt? No-" he trills again, bright, and the heron ruffles up and makes a chuffing noise. "Of course I did," Arum says again, gentler, tapping the bird softly beneath the beak, and then he seems to remember Rilla and Damien, still watching.

Rilla's breathing hasn't entirely slowed from the shock, yet, but she's smiling now as she watches him, and Damien has come close beside her, stowing his bow again and pressing a hand over his mouth to bury his own smile, and Arum's frill ruffles by his neck at their observation.

"Er-"

"A friend?" Rilla asks, an eyebrow raising.

"One of my- my subjects, I suppose you could say," Arum murmurs, and he can't seem to help the smile as the bird presses its head into his horns again, trilling sternly. "Yes, I know. Hush." He gives the bird an equally stern look despite the laugh he gives, and then he lifts an arm for the creature to step to. "I know," he says quietly. "But you are frightening the horse, and I would rather not be kicked, little creature. I am nearly mended once, I would not like to suffer recovery a second time. Find your flock, spread the word if you must."

The bird squawks irritably, aiming its beak towards the humans for a moment before it turns back to Arum and flaps its wings at him.

"I said find your flock," he says in a low, fond growl. "Go on, you ridiculous thing. You need not worry for me. Go on."

The bird shifts from foot to foot on Arum's arm, chattering lightly, and then it pecks at the tip of Arum's snout and flaps before it lifts off, flying back up into the canopy again, singing something loud and joyous as it goes.

Arum sighs, his shoulders sagging as the weight of the creature is gone from him, but he clearly can't bury his smile. Damien takes Rilla's hand, and then they both come close to Arum, and Rilla lifts her other hand to touch the monster's elbow.

"Seemed excited to see you," she says, her tone only barely teasing, and his smile is so entirely warm, and Rilla and Damien's hands tighten together, each squeezing at the same moment.

"Yes, well," he makes a rattling noise low in his chest, still smiling. "I imagine they will all be quite ready for the swamp to return to normal."

"What do we do, then, about the wall?" Damien asks, gently, and Arum's smile flickers off.

He frowns, eyeing the woven greenery, and then he grumbles, "Bring me closer. It should still answer… it should still… still be able to hear."

Rilla doesn't exactly understand what that means, but- she figures he knows what to do in this situation better than she does, anyway, so she helps him. After a step or two Damien steps up on his other side, supporting him further.

"Thank you," Arum murmurs when they are close enough, and then he very gently pulls away from their hands. He lifts his own hand, and just barely touches the tangle of foliage, and then he swallows, chest rumbling. "Keep?"

Rilla barely manages to stop herself from reaching for him again. He sounds so- so desperate, and the urge to help him is-

"Keep. Can you hear me?" He pauses, and Rilla can see that he's trying not to cringe as he runs his hand along the vines. "Keep, I'm here, I- I need you to let me in."

Nothing changes, for a long moment. Beside her, Damien reaches a hand out, gripping Rilla's hand tight again, his nerves mirroring her own.

"Keep," he says again, keening clear in his voice. "Keep, please-"

Arum stumbles back as vines burst from the ground, new and accompanied by harmonious song, overtaking the wall and forming an archway that fills with magic, with- with a door, leading somewhere quite different from the swamp they could see past the wall.

Arum chokes a breath, warbles in further harmony with the song, and on shaking legs he bolts through the archway.

The Keep winds its vines around him so quickly that he is in the air before his feet even touch the floor of his home, before he has time to even breathe a syllable. It sings bright and clear and joyful, and it slots its mind soft against his again, precisely as their minds are meant to fit, in tune again so instantly that the vines don’t even come close to accidentally brushing any of the healing wounds that might still suffer from the pressure, and Arum can’t help the way he chokes, the way his throat goes tight and his eyes go hot, because-

He has missed his Keep so, so unbearably much.

He was never meant to be away for this long. His limbs are shaking with the relief of it even as he clings to its supportive vines, as he brushes his palms over the new bursts of flowers it is gleefully blooming around him. He’s so tightly enmeshed, so thoroughly cocooned, he wouldn’t have even noticed Amaryllis and Damien following through the portal if he could not feel the precise moment the Keep notices them.

The Keep notices them, and it is filled instantly with terror.

The humans are wound tight in vines nearly as quickly as Arum himself was, though these new vines are substantially less friendly as they pin Amaryllis and Damien against the wall with a discordant trill.

Arum feels the wash of terror pulse through with confusion, fury, protectiveness, and the vines around the humans continue to tighten. Arum’s heart skips, and he scrambles, reaching a hand through the bramble around him towards his- his- whatever, precisely, they are to him.

“Stop-” he snarls, the full force of his denial pushing out into his home, compelling the Keep to pause. The vines cease tightening, though they do not release. “Don’t hurt- don’t hurt them. They did not harm me, Keep, of that I can assure you,” he says in a breathless rush. “They did not harm me. They- they-”

The Keep stills, feeling his thoughts, and the grip it has upon the humans is already loosening. Arum needs not say more; the Keep understands him. It understands, and it loves him, and he needs not say a single word more.

He will say it anyway. It is true.

“They brought me back to you,” he says, his voice ragged and too full, and the both of them stare at him as they are lowered gently back to the floor. “They brought me home.”

[->]

#elle's fanfic #scattered on my shore #the penumbra podcast #second citadel #rad bouquet #lizard kissin' tuesday #lord arum #amaryllis of exile #sir damien #YELLIN AND YELLING I BEG U TO TELL ME FEEDBACK

[moskaisley]

17 questions tag game

Nicknames: leo :)

Zodiac: taurus sun, leo moon, and aries rising

Height: 5′2″

Hogwarts House: gryffindor babyyyyyy

Last Thing I Googled: ‘incredulous’ because i can’t fucking spell

Song Stuck In My Head: EARFQUAKE by tyler the creator 

Number of Followers: 186!! ily all :)

Amount of Sleep: maybe like 6-7 hrs if im lucky?? 

Lucky Number: 3 

Dream Job: creative director first, and then design professor! 

Wearing: black tank and boxer shorts 

Favorite Song: kill the director by the wombats !! i listened to them religiously throughout high school and i love them so freakin much. when i’m not scared to go into a tattoo parlor im DEF getting their lyrics tatted 

Favorite Instrument: Piano and Guitar

Aesthetic: house plants, vinyl records, black coffee, 35 mm photos and polaroids, dr marten’s chelsea boots, early mornings on the beach,  serif typefaces, paper collages and cutting with an xacto knife, half finished sketchbooks, speeding down the highway at 2am, stickers, deadlines deadlines deadlines

Favorite Author: i don’t read as much as i should SO instead here are some of my favorite graphic designers :)

shigeo fukuda - awesome japanese poster designer known for striking powerful graphics 

jenny holzer - very cool displays of typography as art

saul bass - famous for his movie posters and kinetic type !! you’ve DEF seen his work, think of the shining :)

peter saville - famous for his album designs for omd, new order, and joy division !

Favorite Animal Noise: that lil squeak that turtles make when they have sex!! 

Random: story time! in high school, i rarely ever got involved with drama and didn’t have beef with anyone etc etc. UNTIL our student council (who was, in fact, mostly white in a asian majority school) decided our homecoming theme was gonna be “journey to the far east” 🙃 im talkin stupid ass shit like  “bollywood day” with white girls in saris and bindis and random ass chinese characters and cherry blossoms/paper lanterns 

now as an asian who is constantly sick of our culture being used as an “aesthetic” u could imagine my distress. as any teenager would do, i talked mad shit about on twitter and then got sent a group chat where stuco called me a bitch and a heifer and a whore! someone said they wanted me to trip and break a heel! all because i was sick orientalist bullshit

moral of the story: dont use asian culture as an aesthetic or i will body slam you

Thanks for tagging me @tiffdawg and @qveenbvtch 

No Pressure Tags: @thesefleshfailures @spacegayofficial @huliabitch @forever-rogue @romanticgumchewer @ravingmadstark and anyone else idk 17 blogs sjfkla;df if u wanna take a whirl go for it !! 

#tag game #interesting how much my answers have changed in the past few months

[sevenseasofrog]

Lads ‘n Lasses Chapter 3

Pairing- highschool!ben x fem!reader

Summary- single sex schools are never boring

Word Count- 1,467

a/n- sorry this ones only short, as I’ve said though, the next chapter is a little juicier, it’ll be up later next week :) hopefully y’all like it though !!❤️❤️

As ever, September crawled by painfully slowly, with each student rebuilding the exhausting school routine for yet another year. For most of the other girls in your school, they started their day with a steaming mug of coffee or loose leaf tea. Your day however started with a real mug, who stood outside your door at 7:15 each morning waiting for you to stumble out. For the pair of you, coffee came later on in the process.

It would be fair to say that you had never bonded with someone quite so quickly as you had with Ben. The walks to school were no longer quiet and solemn as they once had been, and the walks home from school had you reaching your house with even more energy than you had at the start of the day. The pair of you had clicked into place almost immediately after first meeting each other, and it had become an extremely rare occurrence to see one of you without the other outside of school hours. You were most gracious when your friendship group welcomed him with open arms, a little. nervous at first that they wouldn’t want the new boy to cause a commotion. Him and Lewis became equally great friends, and it was nice knowing that he had friends at school too. The pair were hilarious to watch when they were together, mainly because they were polar opposites. There was Ben, short blonde hair, piercing green eyes, perfectly symmetrical face, very athletically built and a little shorter than the rest of the boys in his year; and then there was Lewis, long and lanky, often nicknamed Stretch by others, deep brown eyes, mousey brown bowl cut and slightly wonky teeth. The two boys couldn’t have been more different if they tried, but being able to call them your friends was one of the greatest privileges.

Things had moved quickly since the start of the new term, and you were working tirelessly to complete coursework in school simply so you didn’t have to do it at home, luckily, the free periods you had after lunch were becoming increasingly useful now the workload had gotten heavier. It was equally convenient that your friends were in a similar mindset, which meant that the time you had after school wasn’t spent alone. Making the most of the autumn warmth, the five of you would often head down to the park where you would lie contently until someone’s parents rang, instructing them to come home, at which point you would all leave. Maria and Lewis would step off the tram first, then Niamh a few stops later, once again leaving you and Ben alone for the rest of the journey home.

“You coming back to mine for a bit then?” You asked, looking up from your bag, in which you were searching for the pack of chewing gum you knew was floating around in there somewhere.

“Don’t have any reason not to, Mum and Dad are away on business until Sunday night anyway.” You felt yourself frown a little, today was Thursday, and to you it seemed a little unfair for Ben’s parents to leave him alone for a good chunk of the week, especially since you had become aware that this happened more often than not.

“D’ya wanna come round to mine tomorrow though? only seems fair really, your parents will start confusing me as one of their own otherwise” Ben had a gleam in his eyes and you let out a scoff.

“Go on then, I’ll check later yeah?”

Dinner was practically on the table by the time you and Ben reached the house, and it wasn’t long before you had both finished and we’re making your way upstairs. As ever, you flopped down onto your neatly made duvet, and Ben parked himself on the spinning office chair which was by your desk.

“I’m. So. Tired.” You dragged out each syllable for emphasis.

“Nah, you’re not the one doing laps of a field each day��, Ben replied with a smirk, stretching his arms above his head.

“That’s because I love myself dipstick.” You spoke back, giggling to yourself a little.

“Don’t be a bitch! I carry the whole bloody rugby team at the moment!”

“Sure you do… What would we do without our knight in shining armour to score all the tries in a match no one realllyyy cares about”, you both rolled your eyes at each other before Ben could slide in another sarcy comment.

Believe it or not, you enjoyed moments like this, you were both being yourself and there was no one else there to tell you to pack it in. Time you spent with Ben always went a little too quickly for your liking however, since you would both spend hours talking, it was easy to lose track of how late it was.

“Shit! it’s half-nine!”

“Are you joking?” You asked, genuinely shocked

“Unfortunately not”, Ben spoke as he sprang up from next to you on the bed and began to pick up his bag and put his jumper back on for the journey back to his house. You walked down the stairs with him and to the front door where you gave a quick hug before yawning.

“See you tomorrow Jonsey”

“y/n l/n.” He paused “We both know we’ll be talking on the phone in like 20 minutes so don’t get too ahead with yourself, aight?”

“You got me there!”, You three your arms up in defeat, “Now please piss off so I can go to bed!”

Ben gave one last grin before turning and heading down the gravelled path of your otherwise green driveway, you watched him walk to the corner of the dimly-lit road before shutting the front door and trudging up the stairs back to your room for the night.

When Ben said you’d be talking again shortly, he really wasn’t lying, and it hadn’t been half an hour before your phone began to buzz uncontrollably.

The bois and the gorls: 3 New Messages

Prince Ben of the South joined the chat

Prince Ben of the South:

Gooooooooooood eveeeeninggggg everyoneeeee

Nev joined the chat

Nev:

What.

Dear Maria Count Me In joined the chat

Dear Maria Count Me In:

Hello??

You joined the chat

Le Artiste:

Wassup

Prince Ben of the South:

Lewissss ??

Where are you my beany friend ??

Le Artiste:

What dya want jonsey

Long Boy joined the chat

Long Boy:

At your service

Prince Ben of the South:

Right

K

So

Not sure if you all care but basically I just got a message from the team group chat and there’s gonna be a halloween shout at some point in the holidays so do yall wanna be my plus four or na?

Nev:

Nice one mateee

Le Artiste:

Oooooooo

Long Boy:

One question my noble companion

Costumes?

Prince Ben of the South:

oh you know it ;)

Dear Maria Count Me In:

Omg yes

Le Artiste:

Im sold

Long Boy:

Don’t see why not ?

Prince Ben of the South:

We should SO do a group thing

Nev:

Fuck off

Dear Maria Count Me In:

Oooooooo, acc that’s quite a good idea

Long Boy:

Only if y/n is in charge of what we wear

Le Artiste:

So im a fashion designer as well now ???

Prince Ben of the South changed your name to Coco Channel

Nev:

Evidently, u better make me look HOT tho

Coco Channel:

of course bby ;)

Dear Maria Count Me In:

Is that that then ??

I can sleep now ??

Prince Ben of the South:

You are all free to go :)

Nev left the chat

Dear Maria Count Me In left the chat

Long Boy:

Not until i know how much of a prick ill look at this thing

What am I wearingggg

Coco Channel:

Gimmie a sec ive had like 3 seconds to think

Prince Ben of the South:

Steady on lhewees

Give the gal a chance

Long Boy:

If this isnt good then ill sue

Coco Channel:

Anything for u dear

Long Boy left the chat

Prince Ben of the South:

I have no problem believing that

Btw if u make me look silly then ill never forgive u

Coco Channel:

Im quite sure u wont tbh

Prince Ben of the South:

Cya in like 10 hours g

Coco Channel:

Bye stinky :)

Prince Ben of the South left he chat

You gave a tired sigh before placing your phone down on your bedside table and flicking off the lamp next to it, as you pulled the crisp duvet up to your ears, wondering what on earth you had just signed up for.

There was one thing you knew for certain however.

This was bound to be good.

Very good indeed.

tags(if you want tagging in future chapters lemmie know !!) - @fatbottomedbitch , @crazyweirdocalledfriday , @disaster—bisexual , @seedless-vascular , @annoyedsloth , @borhapandshawn , @prettysureimgayxo

#bohemian rhapsody #roger taylor #brian may #ben hardy #queen #bo rhap #queen band #freddie mercury #joe mazzello #john deacon #gwilym lee #ben hardy! roger taylor #roger taylor x reader #roger taylor imagine #ben!roger imagine #ben!roger x reader #ben hardy!roger x reader #ben!roger taylor #ben hardy x reader #ben hardy imagine #lads ‘n lasses #bohemian rapsody movie #rami malek #lucy boynton #bo rhap moodboard #bo rhap ships #bo rhap imagines

[deniigi]

Hello! Just about to sit down and read your newest fic, so excited about it! I had a question for you (you very well may have answered this already, so sorry in advance!), but do you have advice for writing? Advice in terms of getting start, plotting out stories, helping get the creative juices flowing? I have all these ideas but seem to lack the drive to get things written out. I know the best advice is to just write, but I'm having a horrible time starting. What do you do in those moments?

Hello my dear!

Sorry for taking so long to get back to you. The lord has blessed me with a head cold and ruined all my plans of productivity for the day, so I can finally answer this ask! I’ll talk a little bit about both how to get started with a story and then some little things that help me motivate myself.

I have started a tag for writing advice here: http://deniigi.tumblr.com/tagged/writing-advice

This is going to be a long post, sorry mobile users.

I am going to preface all of this with the understanding that I am technically a professional writer in terms of like, a handful of ways, but I have absolutely zero training in creative writing, so take everything I say with a grain of salt!

So, I personally find that, on the whole, that psychological hurdle of getting started comes a lot from the anticipation of the kind of response a story will get (how many hits, how many comments, how many kudos) in addition to a bit of anxiety or fear over  theloss of sustained interest in that story (by yourself and/or by your audience). I find that this can be alleviated by really, truly internalizing the understanding that you are allowed to write your work however you damn please, for whoever you damn please.

There will be work you write for others, and there will be work you write for yourself. Not all work needs to be published; sometimes, it is really nice to just write shit for yourself; it is a plus for humanity if you decide to share it with others, but you do not have to do that.

Furthermore, I would like to present you with this:

This is what my current folder for under fire looks like. And you might notice that there are almost always multiple drafts per chapter. Yes, I did in fact rewrite chapter four 5 fucking times, you bet your ass I did. And I’m not ashamed of it. I think the story is better for it. And that’s the important thing here: you do not need to produce a perfect draft the first time around. You will not produce that perfect draft. Accept this. Embrace this. Embrace it and your cat at the same time to really ingrain it as a warm, fuzzy feeling.

Liberate yourself from the pressure of needing to produce the perfect, most right draft and you may find starting the piece overall to be a much easier, more pleasant experience.

And along with this beautiful, uplifting spiritual advice, I also bring a practical thought: when it comes to getting started, a lot of times, people feel like they need to set the stage, yadda yadda yadda. Ha. No. Fuck that.

That’s a surefire way to bore the shit out of yourself. Start right in the middle of a scene that captivates you if that’s what you want to write. It’s a free platform. No one’s gonna arrest you if you stick Spiderman upside down in trash first thing. They might even applaud you actually, because you didn’t make them slog through some of that ‘It was the evening of the 25th and it was cold out in the streets” bullshit we all learned from Dickens.

Alright. Now let’s talk about actually getting started making words appear on paper.

So, from my knowledge there are generally two ways that folks write creatively. You have what I’m going to call the planners and then you what I’m going to call the monsters (I call them this entirely affectionately, I’m sure there’s a better word for these folks, but I don’t have it atm, all I have is a headcold). Planners are folks who sit down and work out their major plot points, who write outlines, and who create the scaffolding of their work before they set out on their magical journey. I think of these folks as architects.

And then you have the monsters and these are those fuckers who just sit down and write stream of consciously like the heathens all our high school teachers tried to teach us not to be.

I am both a planner and a monster. And a lot of that depends on the length of work I’m going for. I have never in my life planned a one-shot, for example. I just attack that as it is. I follow my heart, if you will. But when it comes to longer chaptered fics, I really do think that some outlining is super helpful.

You might find it useful for one-shots, though, I dunno. Maybe give it a try and see what happens?

The two main fics I’ve done proper outlines for are Inimitable and under fire and I actually find outlining to be immensely helpful in psyching me up to write the story (I go through and re-read my outlines when I start to lose interest or diverge too much from the plot outlined there in the actual writing. 9 times out of 10, re-reading gets me stupid excited to write all over again) and it also helps me keep momentum going throughout the plot.

Here’s a pic of some pages of under fire’s outline.

Physically writing the work is really important for me because it forces me to only put down key points/feelings/ideas I want to include, whereas typing gives me far too much room to get lost/distracted by extraneous detail. And since my handwriting is a teacher’s worst nightmare and I cross out shit and write huge with emotion, I’ll give you a little bit of what the middle page here says:

Miles-

there’s something thrumming

vibrating in his ears wherever he goes

-closes his eyes and somehow enters blackness- emptyness (Stranger Things style)

beat

beat

beat

“help.”

–BACK - everything is gone

closing his eyes doesn’t bring the space back

–it makes him panic. He doesn’t know why. His heart is pounding. He’s sweating He has a horrible feeling of doom.

beat

beat

beat

its gone.

he goes home anxiously. Pretends everything is normal.

his neck crawls

So basically it’s less of a formal outline and more of a collection of stream of consciousness feelings and screenplay directions which I’ll flesh out in the actual story.

Personally, I love writing these kinds of things because they get me pumped for the story I’m about to tell. I get to write out the key scenes and work through all the hard parts first, and then, while I’m writing, I work through the little fun details and banter and I have to write to figure out how we get from one scene to the next and I love the challenge of having to fit those pieces together. I very rarely stick strictly to my outline, (as anyone who is currently reading under fire can tell you right now), but I do try to stick to the main plot points in it and my writing is certainly better for it.

So yes. Outlining is very good, but it is even better when you do it to some kind of music. I listened to What’s Up Danger from the Into the Spiderverse soundtrack on repeat while I wrote this outline to kind of transfer some of the relentless pace conveyed in that song to the piece’s plot.

I highly recommend using music to set the mood of your piece while/before you write a piece of any length. It helps get you in the right headspace (excited or somber or angry) to write. You need emotion to write creatively. You can’t just make that happen sometimes; you need a little help.

A couple other things which might help:

1. Leave your house or the space you’re normally in. Go to a cafe and find a nice corner and have a think and a try in there. Sometimes moving to a different space helps you escape cyclical thinking patterns.

2. Write what you want to read. Don’t bother writing for other peoples’ interests; that’ll just bore the shit out of you all over again.

3. Find an atmospheric mood sound to listen to on Youtube or smth (I personally like Rain on a Car Windshield for slightly somber fics, but you might be into ocean storms or dripping caves or whatever).

4. Heat your feet. I don’t know why but I am entirely unproductive when my feet are cold. Maybe this one is me-specific, but whatevs. Heat the feets!

5. If you’re still having trouble just sitting down and pounding the story out, that’s okay! Maybe it’s not ready to be written yet. Maybe you’re not in the right headspace yet. Sometimes that’s just how it is. One story makes its way out in like, a hour, and the next one takes like, months to finally be written. We all work at different paces. We all write for different reasons.

It might help to figure out why you want to write a story before you write it. Like, if its for attention, it’s gonna be hard as hell. But if there’s an idea that you feel like is important or if there’s a mood you’re trying to work yourself into or out of, then that might be a little easier. For example, I wrote a piece called make it work which is about Fogs finding his motivation to be a lawyer and fight for justice when Kavanaugh was confirmed and I felt super helpless in the face of our present justice system. That story kind of wrote itself and it needed to be written, I feel, not just for me, but for others who were feeling just as helpless.

Writing is catharsis in that way. Maybe you just need to find out what you need to wring out of your soul.

Sorry that got very metaphysical. But I do want to stress that getting started and ending a story are the hardest parts of writing them, so you are definitely not alone if you feel like you’re ramming your head into a wall here.

I hope something here helps you, my dear!

#fic #writing advice #fanfiction #managingmischiefsince1988

[casgirlsam]

I posted 1,713 times in 2021

77 posts created (4%)

1636 posts reblogged (96%)

For every post I created, I reblogged 21.2 posts.

I added 146 tags in 2021

#spn wank - 27 posts

#q&anon - 26 posts

#dream smp - 25 posts

#queue a little queue for me - 15 posts

#destiel - 14 posts

#bee duo - 11 posts

#technoblade - 9 posts

#anonymous - 7 posts

#rancid nutwork - 6 posts

#loki spoilers - 6 posts

Longest Tag: 125 characters

#me now: im naming you after one of my adopted fictional children so that i can guide you and protect you through your journey

My Top Posts in 2021

#5

bridgewater team callin misha a lead of spn has got me @ bronlies like

119 notes • Posted 2021-07-27 11:12:44 GMT

#4

i love how jack, the result of human/angel relations in both nature and nurture, is the new god.

jack is the result of a human and angel being physically intimate and conceiving him into being

but he is also the result of a human and angel, the ones that adopted the newly orphaned nephilim, being in love and passing that love onto him

jack is what happens when one angel sees the best humanity has to offer all in one man and wants his son to not only see those same qualities in that man, but also strive to have them himself

jack came to be because not only did two of his fathers put faith in him from the start, but because the one that should have hated him the most loved his angel dad so much that he saw how much jack and cas were alike and couldnt help but give in

jack is what happens when you combine the best of heaven and earth

125 notes • Posted 2021-01-03 14:39:42 GMT

#3

you know what? i was gonna TOTALLY LEGALLY WATCH *wink* w4lker but after seeing what the network did? not doing it

like imagine thinking this a good idea just after the fucking violent treasonous insurrection that fnc is in part culpable for

don't give c*w another fucking second of views or another hint of engagement.  im so fucking livid.  im serious. don't even fucking pirate it. don't even THINK about that network. they are not worth a second of your time

357 notes • Posted 2021-01-16 23:22:55 GMT

#2

HEY IF EVERYONE COULD STOP SPREADING THE RUMOR THAT MISHA AND VICKI FUCKED HIS CHILDHOOD BEST FRIEND THATD BE GREAT

a post that has 4,000, FOUR THOUSAND!!!, notes on it is going around and i’m fucking tired. i’m done. y’all didn’t learn from the bill clinton/misha news coverage. y’all didn’t learn from tv writer steve yockey having to come on twitter which he RARELY DOES to explain he isn’t dead.

TUMBLR IS NOT INSULATED FROM THE REST OF THE INTERNET FUCKING KNOCK IT THE FUCK OFF

358 notes • Posted 2021-04-26 13:21:08 GMT

#1

i'm happy misha put pronouns in their profile but its disappointing they're still scared to come out as nb, the day they finally change it to they/them will be a day of celebration.

this is gonna come out harsh, but as someone who leans heavy into the gender fluid spectrum and uses binary she/her pronouns, im Annoyed™️ by this fucking disrespect so you can understand the harshness

you dont know whether he ids as enby or not and if he does, he can still use binary pronouns and besides that REGARDLESS: respect his pronouns for the love of fucking god

this is really disrespectful. misha’s, A REAL LIVING BREATHING PERSON’S, identity is NOT for you. it’s for HIM.

would YOU like it if someone misgendered you on purpose because they said they knew better than you? no and you shouldn’t tolerate it because thats not ok

just like what youre doing now. fucking stop.

and you know what? i knew it. i fucking knew that yall would make it about YOURSELVES. this wasnt about misha putting pronouns in his bio as an (assumed) ally. this was about yall projecting onto a man you have a parasocial relationship with and him putting the “right” pronouns in his profile.

(also he KNOWS what enby is and he KNOWS about they/them/their so stop infantilising a man in his 40s thats heavy in activism)

please stop this. it’s not good for anyone involved.

to recap: misha says HE uses HE/HIM/HIS pronouns and until HE says otherwise, YOU WILL RESPECT THAT JUST LIKE YOU WOULD FOR ANYONE ELSE

this is the only ask i’ll answer that misgenders HIM on purpose and if i get anymore, theyre getting deleted as fast as they come in. try me.

420 notes • Posted 2021-02-02 08:02:41 GMT

Get your Tumblr 2021 Year in Review →

#my 2021 tumblr year in review #your tumblr year in review

[wheredidhiseyebrowsgo]

Hey do you know any fics where stiles and allison are twins or siblings. any romantic paring works i just want stiles and allison sibling relationship THANKS!!

AND

Anonymous said:so im really into this fic ‘the three little hunters’, do you know of any good fics with allison and stiles as siblings? preferably sterek

Here’s an update to our Allison and Stiles!Siblings tag! - Anastasia

Heaven by PrincessaBitchessa

(1/1 I 1,122 I Not Rated I Sterek)

Based off of this post .

The Crown by thatdragonchic

(1/? I 1,360 I Not Rated I Stydia)

What does it mean… to be a monarch? To be a king? What his his place, what is his job? He sits, and he has to wonder, for in the end, Stiles always believed he had more time. He wished he just had more time.

Arrangements by KuteKittehs

(4/? I 1,775 I Teen I Sterek)

Allison Argent is chosen to bind the Argent family and Hale family together by mating with Derek Hale. She falls in love with childhood friend Scott McCall so her twin omega brother Stiles decides to take her place to see her happy.

However, Derek Hale hates omegas.

What’s my name again. by Katie_MichelleAMLFTL

(2/? I 1,939 I General I Scallison)

Allison and Stiles Argent are left alone when their father leaves them behind to go after the rogue wolf that killed his wife, back at home the twins are dealing with problems of their own when a witch passes through and curses Stiles, memories falling away and forgetting basic things Allison is left not knowing how to handle a brother that cant remember her. Her dad’s not picking up the phone and her brother cant remember how to hold a spoon, she remembers her dad once mentioning the hale family and their extensive family library, how they probably had books on magic that the hunters would never comprehend. Allison packs herself and her brother up, making the journey to beacon hills, unknown to them that the majority of the Hale family is gone, that the Alpha pack and a Darach are causing trouble and that the remaining Hales wont exactly be jumping to help any Argents.

What’s hidden under a good facade by YaoiDieHardFanGirl

(1/? I 2,455 I Teen I Sterek)

Stiles, Allison and Isaac moves to Beacon Hills in hope of following their dreams and live a life away from the expectations, from their lineage as Argents

But, this place is Beacon Hills, NOTHING ever goes the way anyone wants it to here.

The Death of Me by damnfancyscotch

(1/? I 2,501 I Teen)

Stiles Stilinski and Laura Hale are best friends. Like, the best of Best Friends, capital letters and all.

She’s the peanut butter to his jelly, the cheese to his macaroni. No matter what, it’s always been LauraandStiles.

That’s why it’s so fucking cliche that Stiles is crushing on Laura’s younger brother.

But seriously, when did dorky little Der Bear get so goddamn hot?

—–

“God, Laura’s gonna kill me,” Stiles groans, back arching when Derek sets his mouth on the junction of his neck and shoulder.

“Please don’t talk about my sister right now,” Derek growls as he tightens his hold on Stiles’ hip.

“Sorry.”

Between the Lines by thatdragonchic

(2/? I 3,110 I General I Stydia)

Deep love can be rooted in the strangest of places, even between two friends in a world of teas and ladies. Even after Stiles and Theo take their brides, there was always something there that lingered, something that was rarely sought. Very few saw through it, in fact they have even fooled themselves.=1890’s au

Scattered to the Winds by Ragga

(1/1 I 5,112 I Teen I Chris/Victoria)

Chris watched as Victoria seemingly coiled ever tighter, arms clutched around her stomach as if to protect something that no longer was there. He still remembered how less than two weeks ago they had been lying on this bed together, caressing the bump on her belly, whispering and giggling sweet-nothings to-

He heard the doorbell go.

“Kate?”

Team Beta (Detective Duo) by graveltotempo

(2/2 I 5,413 I Not Rated I Erica/Boyd)

A single picture, and Erica and Boyd go down the detective route to find out more about Stiles and Allison’s true ancestry.

Catch Me If You Can by MadnessofVoid

(1/1 I 5,923 I Teen I Sterek)

Beacon Hills was the first city in California, in the world, that turned the whole soulmate thing into a celebration. There were banners, posters, bumper stickers – the works – every single year. There were even t-shirts being sold that said I Ran insert year And All I Got Was This Stupid Shirt for those that had been in The Run and failed to find their soulmate.

Derek was hoping that this year he wouldn’t get a fifth one.

or

Every year there is a run for humans and supernaturals alike to find their soulmate. Derek’s just never lucky in finding his.

It’s Strange (So Strange) by StupidGenius

(1/1 I 7,912 I Teen I Sterek)

“M’not a little baby.” Stiles huffs. His feet can’t touch the floor where he’s sitting, legs swinging back and forth. “I’m eight years old.”

“Yeah? Well I’m twelve. I’m a big kid now.” He flashes his eyes for emphasis. Stiles doesn’t look impressed.

“You’re not a big kid. Cousin Wednesday says you can’t be a big kid until you’re a teen. You’re not a teen.”

“I am too a big kid!”

Cold Blooded by SammyVen

(3/? I 10,588 I Not Rated I Sterek)

When various hunters start to be killed by an unknown supernatural creature, the Argents decide to call in reinforcements.

I’m Proud of Us. by MataSenpai

(2/? I 14,142 I Mature I Allison/Isaac I MCD)

'Allison is forced back into the Family Business when her father goes missing. Now it’s up to her and her brother to find him. Along the way, they save people, hunt a few monsters, and become a family again.’

The Presidents Son by Some1sprincess

(5/? I 20.323 I Mature I Sterek)

Stiles was a normal teenage kid… okay that wasnt true, she was far from normal which is how she found herself taking a bullet for President Talia with the infamous Derek Hale near by.

Rescue Me by DarkAlpha67

(7/? I 20,263 I Teen I Sterek)

Stiles had does as promised. With Beacon Hills behind him and his new life as hunter his only reality, Stiles has his future planned out. Hunting monsters with his sister, Allison, by his side and working toward reinstating the Argent name, Stiles thinks he’s put everything behind him, for good.

But Beacon Hills always has a way of drawing you back in.

A Breath of Life by bloodrednight25

(7/? I 24,871 I Explicit I Allison/Derek)

the Stilinski triplets are used to the supernatural world, with their mothers being the Slayers and what not, but for Stiles Stilinski it’s going to be a roller-coaster ride when he meets Stefan Salvatore who pulls him into his dark world; where Elena Gilbert become his best friend and ally.

The Three Little Hunters by damnfancyscotch

(19/? I 34,839 I Teen)

Allison is being groomed to take over the Argent Hunters.

Stiles, her twin brother, is all set to be her Right Hand.

Liam, the youngest, is going to be her Enforcer and training expert.

The three of them are going to be the most dangerous and efficient group of Hunters in the history of their family.

There’s just one little problem…

—–

Their dad shouts, "Is anyone in this house not dating a werewolf?!”

Stiles raises his hand. “Technically, none of us are dating them, per say. We just sort of end up in the same places sometimes and then don’t leave.“ He pauses, then adds, "There may also be kissing but I’m not willing to give any concrete evidence of that.”

Against All Odds by silveritas

(16/16 I 37,236 I Teen I Sterek)

It is a universally acknowledged truth that a single alpha in possession of a good fortune must be in want of a mate.

The Things We Lost In The Fire by Rachel_twentyone

(6/14 I 72,491 I General I Sterek)

He wasted no more time and got under his bed, he crawled until he was all the way back against the wall. He covered his mouth with his hands, they were more steady now. But he couldn’t control his breathing, it would turn him in and Stiles really didn’t want that. His eyes were glassy of the tears that he refused to shed, it wasn’t the time to cry, just until all this was over. He heard someone entering the room, dragging their feet, slowly steps looking for him. Stiles squeezed his eyes and the tears that he was holding on slipped down his cheeks.

Someone was in front of the bed, he knew it but he didn’t dare open his eyes.

"Stiles” His mother whispered with calm soft voice, “Take my hand baby” Slowly Stiles opened his eyes to see, for his relief, that his mother was kneeled with his hand extended toward him waiting for Stiles to grabbed it.

#teen wolf #sterek #stiles stilinski #derek hale #Scallison #allison argent #Scott McCall #stydia #lydia martin #allison and stiles siblings #Anon

[hereliesbitches--me]

Rules

Hello There! Well if you’re here, that means you’re probably interested in me and me cat girl here, and for that I thank you!

While I’m not too big on specific rules, I suppose it’s best to have some little stuff that may clear up some questions in the future.

 First off, Both Mun and Muse are of age. 18+ ,

Mature themes will be present on here, and some aspects of Rosie, her life, and her habits may be triggering. Such as mentions of physical and emotional abuse, manipulation, rape, suicidal thoughts and tendencies,  etc. I try not to get too detailed but if you’re squeamish about it, follow at your own risk.

I do my best to tag triggers with things such as

tw: (insert trigger), but im not perfect. If ya see something that bothers you, let me know so I know what to tag for future reference. I won’t bite your head off for anything, i’m pretty understanding as long as you approach politely. I myself have no triggers, but please tag nsfw stuff.

The basic roleplay etiquette applies here just as much as anywhere else. Most people already know- no godmodding, metagaming,  etc. It’s no fun like that, and we’re all here to have fun, right?

Im open to just about anyone, mutuals and non-mutuals. Canon or OC muses. Even if we don’t follow each other, im happy to roleplay anything if you have an idea. 

Please, feel free to shoot me a message in the inbox even just to say hello when you follow, if you’d like. If you want to interact, and you send me a message like “Wanna RP?” please have something to suggest. Even something completely vague can lead to more, because I myself can suck in coming up with something on the spot. I’ll likely ask you personal questions about your muse, like what draws you to them and such even if you have a bio page and all that, I just like to hear different thoughts. A well rounded character is great, and if it’s in development I don’t mind exploring subjects and aspects.

I would definitely appreciate basic literary knowledge.

I’m fine with small mistakes here and there, but I have to at least be able to make sense of it.  If English is not your first language, I ain’t gonna bash ya for it. I’ll make do- though unfortunately, I’m a loser that knows only English. That’s all I can write in. I am on mobile most of the time, so sometimes formatted responses may take me some time to look into because it doesn’t translate well into mobile. Won’t keep me from following if I like your writing, but I am a simple gal ^^

. When it comes to following, I may not always follow back. But that doesn’t always mean I don’t want to rp.

 Like with multimuse blogs, I may have a bit of difficulty because there’s so much to take in, but I do try sometimes!! Also, as nice as it is, im not a person that likes to get involved in social justice post, political post, or drama/callout posts. To each their own, and I respect your opinions and your passion, but personally I don’t have the mental strength to be drained in the involvement of such things. I don’t mind ooc posts because I do them myself, but if the subjects become too heavy and repetitive, I will have to unfollow. I rather leave that stuff on a personal blog, not an rp blog. If there is something I do that bothers you, you are free to unfollow as well, but just because I unfollow does not mean our interactions have to stop. You can also just approach me directly and we can discuss it so I don’t make you uncomfortable, I don’t mind compromising! I hope you can understand! I don’t condone the gross shit like actual racism, -phobias, etc if its a real issue- then call it out, but when it comes to material being written, I personally don’t believe that people should be policed in what they write if they are not actually harm anyone, and that everyone needs to stay in their own lane. Thank you. 

I like to write in para format, personally.

 I like to get in depth and put a lot into a scene and scenario, so one liners aren’t exactly something I enjoy- Lest it’s for crack and such. You’ll probably see me fooling around a lot, but actual rp is usually done in paragraphs. I sometimes do and I sometimes don’t use icons. I have to draw mine out, mostly, I also use Aoshika from Wolf Guy as a face claim for expressions as well, but the issue is being on Tumblr mobile about 80% of the time blows up the icons out of proportion. Im sure you understand how long drawing icons can take. I apologize now if it looks ugly on the dash. As a partner, I’m not too picky about having icons or not as long as the quality of writing is good. Do you my dudes!

Speaking of writing, I’m horribly slow with replies. 

I apologize in advance, as I am a student in college and I’m working, I find it hard to get inspired to actually sit down and write. But I take long because I will not give anyone a half-assed reply, I make sure there is always something to work with. And if for whatever reason something I wrote doesn’t make sense for your muse in a scenario, just let me know! Im always willing to edit and change something . Even if I’m not writing replies, I’m always open to ooc chats and ideas to throw around about future scenarios.

In regards to shipping, I am Multiship, but I do naturally have my preferred partners. 

 Don’t let that turn you away though! I ship based on chemistry, based on interesting dynamics, and the likes. If you have an idea and you wanna ship, please let me know. I may not always be into it at first but who knows, it can grow on me! Rosie is bisexual so she has potential with both male and female partners, however how her behavior is between the genders varies in a relationship. You will find that Rosie has more sexual interest with the same potential romantic interest in men, and is much more romantically inclined than sexually interest in women. While she is generally open about male relations, she’s even more picky about females because its based more on emotional attachment. But both are absolutely possible.

A side note about Rosie is that depending on the stage in which she is met, and in what verse, loving her is not always easy.

She is an unstable woman underneath with trauma which has created association that expression of emotion is bad. She won’t always be the most loving and affectionate person at times as she drowns herself in responsibility, and she is not very direct in expressing her love through words, but rather through actions. Can definitely be a rough ride, but if you’re willing to go on an emotional roller coaster, so am I. ♡ I am also always open to platonic ships, friendships, hateships and all that kind of good stuff. Variety gives me life and makes everything more interesting.  Rosie has been even prone to toxic relationships.

When it comes to writing smut, understandably I will not write it with minors.

 In general, it takes me a while to be fully comfortable enough with a partner to write it, but I’m not closed off to the idea once we build up a good bond ooc and between the muses. Anything smut related is tagged under nsfw. Rosie is has a sexual addiction in a way, so she may be highly suggestive if she’s interested. I’m absolutely okay with fading to black if that is your preference!

On the note of Rosie’s sexual addiction as a hypersexual, please understand that she can be quite sensitive to it being brought to light. Its a shame to have such intrusive thoughts. Her emotions and feeling towards people can vary drastically- she can be completely indifferent to sexual thoughts towards a person, and then at some other time she needs it like a junkie. She may joke around her flirtatious conquest with friends, but it is not something she likes to get into. Also suffering from bipolar depression, her moods can vary drastically when dealing with particular people.

I like plot driven threads very much.

I find on the whim threads rather hard to keep up, and slice of life moments are only a rare indulgence.  I can indulge in all kinds of subjects, from the nitty gritty to the fluffy, whatever my partner might be interested in as long as we can discuss it.

Rosie was made from an original world, but she is an absolutely malleable character to any sort of fandom story. You can jump to mine or I can jump to yours, even if I know nothing about it. I’m more than willing to do research, go off of what you might tell me, and we can go on a journey from there! I need new stuff in my life. Please show me a new world .

Note that I usually do not like fighting threads.

They can be difficult for me, because while my muse is powerful, she is more often than not incredibly passive. Your muse is free to taunt and push buttons, but know well that she is fully capable of biting back hard. There are consequences for actions, but I do not like going into battle threads unless it’s plotted. For the sake of her children, or keeping her secrets, she is not afraid to kill.

PLEEEAAASEE!! Please Please Please understand that my muse and I DO NOT share the same views on things.Muse does not equal mun. Especially if there is tension between a muse and Rosie, and she gets snippy and harsh. She can be impulsive and say mean and offensive shit because she’s defensive.. and the shit she does is not always alright. Please understand I will not always condone what she does.. She is her own fictional person.

AAAND THAT SHOULD BE IT! Thank you so very much for reading, and I look forward to threading with you all!

#mobile: rules #Gotta get this stuff up and out #Hope im not being too harsh with stuff..

[dccrossmusic-blog]

Well that'a a wrap- the D.C Cross Ecstatic Racquet album tour is complete! Thank you so much to all my new fans and old fans for the support! It was a lot of fun. I probably drove more than 10000 kms for the 9 shows- which is mental..it was all good until the car broke down in Albury on the weekend- keep reading and you can hear about the drama of the last 48 hours in point form!

Thanks to all the nice people, other musicians and venues and sound people and bar people at the places i played at. All thank you for the free beers, dinners and when people let me stay at the venue or their homes for free. Super mega thank you to Dusty Attic Music Lounge , Howl & Moan Records, Petersham Bowling Club, Plantbased Wholefoods, The Merri Creek Tavern , Franks Wild Years, Mounties and the Bridge Hotel Castlemaine (which is impossible to tag on Facebook).

So everyone is always crapping on about stuff that happens to them on social media but the last 48hours of my tour was quite eventful and i think entertaining for others. Here in point form i will mention the unfolding of the events.

Saturday 3pm Show in Thirroul - Sunday 3pm Show in Castlemaine, Victoria - a bit of driving (about 1700 kms there and back to Sydney) but pretty straight forward- right..what could possibility go right :/

•drive from Marrickville to Thirroul - so far so good

• play a cosy show to some nice people at Franks' Wild Years- very impressed german guy says that i am a beautiful musician and play the guitar like John Frusciante from the Chill Peppers - Brad other founding original member of Gerling comes to the show-a wonderful gesture of support

•Finish show in Thirroul and with a broken GPS head on the drive to Castlemaine, Victoria (about 845km's).

•Get tailgated on the Bulli Pass by some tradie fuckhead- a bit of an anxious 10 minutes but make it okay - our faithful 2004 Holden still seems to be okay.

•Drive for 5 hours on route to Albury as its more than halfway.

•100 kms out of Albury car starts shaking uncontrollably - i thought it was just the Hume Highway - so just cranked AC/DC and LANKUM new album on the distorted car stereo.

•60 km's nearer Albury situation with car gets worse- now know it was a busted CV crankshaft (no idea) and apparently quite dangerous

•Navigate car into Albury and call road side assistance. Sounds like i get a drunk Andrew Jackson Calvert type guy on the phone who relishes in the fact he can say that they can't help me and can tow the vehcile to a mechanic on Monday morning. It's 9.30 Pm Saturday night

•Find the cheapest accom in Albury -$66 a night and stay above a 2 floored techno beer barn full of teenagers on MDMA and very loud party remix / techno music going on. The room looks like was last renovated in the 1950's.

•Call the only guy i know in Albury and hit the RSL after Ross Wilson had just played. Didn't see Ross and damn glad i didn't hear 'Come said the Boy' the second most dodgy song in Australian Music History.

•Stash broken down car in Coles car park. Got to bed in backpackers with Digitalism's - Zdarlight blasting through the building.

•Awake sunday morning and hire car and drive to Castlemaine.

•An hour out of Albury a crazed fucktard - Chopper Reid vibe guy - cruising along in a shitbox Commodore with two kids bikes strapped to the back - a blue bike and little pink bike gets upset that i overtake him on the freeway. As im overtaking he speeds up- i was wasnt really checking my rear view mirror as as i was looking straight ahead to overtake- pretty legit an safe driving from me- anyway, Chopper Reid speeds up and whist i'm overtaking and gets really really mad..i do the thumbs up mate sign and makes him even more angrier..he follows my agrresively for the next 200 kilometres.. very intimidating - the most alarming thought of this was if he is driving so recklessly with two small kids in the car (nee the bikes) imagine what he would do if he caught up to me after 2 hours of full on road rage anger. Yep just what i need right now- anyway decide to James Bond him and speed up so he cant see me, speed into a truck parking side station behind a bunch of bushes- wait till i see him fly pass - teeth grinding trying to find me. Wait 5 minutes and commence my ongoing, fun-filled journey

•Castlemaine Bridge Hotel is a lot further than i calculated. And a path i have never journeyed before- no GPS is making trickier.

•3 hours later -- I ARRIVE! PHEW.

•The Bridge Hotel Castlemaine is a safe haven of coolness in all the chaos.

•Meet old friend Casey Rice at the Bridge Hotel and play two sets of my music to people actually listening to my songs- made the ordeal worthwhile and Skyscrapper Stan aka Stan Woodhouse - the kiwi songsmith works there as the barman- equally parts good and evil - that guy is a crackup..easing into the afternoon with a free pint of something, some comedy gold from Stan and a half price healthy dinner with green stuff in it (maybe vegetables- not on a burger bun so im a bit confused how to eat it ).

•Stay the night above the venue and get up at 4am to drive car back to hire car place. Venues alarm system goes off when i'm having a shower…find the exit and leave gracefully

•On the drive back to Albury - around 4.35am my phone GPS stops working and end up on some lonesome unused highway in a State Forrest in the middle of nowhere - using just my instinct to try and navigate back to Albury

•See a giant Pink moon setting over the trees in state forrest - i think heading towards Canberra (no idea) and makes the trip worthwhile

• Two massive kangaroos leap across the road just seconds away from me, right in front of the car- it's still pitch black - i narrowly avoiding hitting them (a split second before this happened a voice in my head said slow down, be careful, i dont wanna kill no kangaroos) - maybe it was the kangaroos mystical vibe -im not sure but seemed like divine intervention for the next 3 hours that we all survived.

•Some how make it to Heathcote, Victoria and get directions to the Hume Highway by a lady working at a servo with a magical hair braid getting hit on by the local milkman (why do all milkman look the same??) . I've never been happier to see the Hume Highway in my life. Listen to Highway to Hell - AC/DC on cd - my close friends mum gave my as a birthday gift she got from her work - a catholic girls schools - the library was throwing the cd out. Also LANKUM new song 'Wild Rover' that sounds equal parts Irish Rebel folk heroes/ Dirty Three and Tool - I'm having a moment.

•Eventually get back to Albury, put all my guitars and merch and amp back in broken car and return the hire car which was three times the amount i thought it would be cause i had driven extra kilometres.

•Get back in my barely drivable broken down car - Monday morning trying to find a mechanic in Albury to repair car. •Seems all mechanic in Albury are too busy- we can fix the car in 5 days time or are on holidays… Stranded far from home….

•Finally find a mechanic on the outskirts of town who can fix the car- drive barley drivable car around Albury trying to find the mechanic- stressing out front wheels will fall off - takes about 20 minutes without gps and hats off the bloke who gave me the best directions of my life to find mechanic.

•Mechanic looks at car and says its my lucky day - they have the spare part in Albury -which is very rare … a new crank shaft (no idea) - and he can fix it straight away ($500 seems reasonable ).

•Wait 5 hours in the belting Albury sun. Eat the biggest and best potato scallops ive ever had (from North Albury) and presto- hand over credit card and Car is fixed. Drink 2 litres of hot Mountain Dew and drive 6 hours and arrive home safely.

• Triumph scene from Rocky -Bill Contis 'Gonna Fly Now (Theme from Rocky) plays out in my head as i drink a beer and lie on the couch. Maybe next time i will fly.

• And thats what it takes to play two shows as an underground cult folk musician in Australia.

• Get Ecstatic

• And please buy my album on bandcamp to help pay mechanic - maybe a Xmas gift, coming of age …. en vogue vinyl experience

•Remember kids, "It's a JUNGLE out there!".

[pleaseshutupaboutsatou]

AJIN IN AMERICA!!

SPOILERS ABOUND (because i cant help myself....)

.

 NEW AJIN FRIENDS

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Dr. Smith, on a journey to find out more about himself and who he is exactly. In the chapter he’s standing over a cadaver and discusses some insights and brings up, for the first time, fringe cases of people who -almost- become ajin! Suzuki (who ill bring up later) makes him crack a bunch of small smiles. 83

Jesse Pinkman I mean JIM who is salty af to be there. He’s in the smoke cube with Ogura also complaining about his cigs not being the right brand. The brand he smokes is American Spirits which im guessing are sakurais brand too lmao... Anywho, hes acts kinda like Jesse in the later seasons of Breaking Bad where hes super bitter af but he hasnt given up yet. Suzuki invites him to see a Michael Bay movie in the lecture hall but hes gonna nap away his boredom instead. ;_;

And now our star, the one, the only, ☆JUN SUZUKI☆, 32 yo, fan of Harry Potter, and the very FIRST ajin in Japan, the elusive 001! She wakes up at 5am with the biggest smile and pesters Ogura to sign some papers. She has a very genki personality and you get the sense she’s very charming and well-liked. 

Someone asked in the tag a long time ago why are all the female ajin secretaries?? WEL GUESS WHAT :’))))) Anywho, her discussion with Ogura was cut short by Comixology missing the last 7 pages but in those pages its mentioned that she’s been there since she was 22, taken in 10 years ago around when the same time as Tanaka ;_; and she was taken in because its heavily inferred that female ajin are rare? The way she found out she was Ajin is very sad too. She probably went to therapy for it.

Ajin in the US are treated 10x better than Tanaka ever was, however like Jesse Jim says, they’re caged birds and wear gps ankle bracelets....

#SPOILERS #ajin #spoilers af

[madamecolette]

I was tagged by my tremendously brilliant and always on point @cafeleningrad. As always, thank you!

Rules: answer these 85 statements and tag 20 people

THE LAST

1. drink: the blood of my enemies. Okay, technically just water. But enemies beware! And water beware too! *Dramatic music climax* 2. phone call: Someone wanted to sell me a water purifier. I’m telling you, I’m disappointed no one ever calls me to offer me 1 million euros. 3. text message: a friend commented on a YouTuber’s coming out video. Very millenial. 4. song you listened to: Rebecca by Laura Marling 5. time you cried: So many onions. 6. dated someone twice: Two weeks ago, except the second date was the break up one.  7. kissed someone and regretted it: In an attempt to show how comfortable it was, I passionately kissed my pillow once and, not to offend it, but I could have avoided that. 8. been cheated on: Never by people, that I know. That pillow, on the other hand... 9. lost someone special: Most sorrowfully. 10. been depressed: Not as visibly as our economy. 11. gotten drunk and thrown up: I did both things separately, never in the same episode. 3 FAVOURITE COLOURS 12. All the shades 13. of my rich, variable, always growing 14. self-embarrassment

IN THE LAST YEAR HAVE YOU 15. made new friends: Acquaintances. 16. fallen out of love: Only out of my love for some long nourished ideas. 17. laughed until you cried: My best tears. 18. found out someone was talking about you: No, but to get back to the most interesting topic here, I hope they were saying “We should definitely give her 1 million euros”.

19. met someone who changed you: Replace “met” with its opposite. 20. found out who your friends are: None of them was revealed to be an undercover spy or an alien. I’m kind of disappointed. 21. kissed someone on your facebook list: I’m gonna read this as “have you kissed someone leaning on your laptop with your browser open on your facebook list”? and say “No, what a weirdly specific position”. Because if I read it in another way, well... GENERAL 22. how many of your facebook friends do you know in real life: Most of them. 23. do you have any pets: No. Sometimes I think I should get a dog (a stupidly affectionate one), but then the gigantic wave of the responsability to look after another being falls on me and I come back to my senses. 24. do you want to change your name: No, I’m good with all my many personalities’ names. 25. what did you do for your last birthday: Most notably nothing.  26. what time did you wake up: 7 am 27. what were you doing at midnight last night: Is this a custodial interrogation? Do I have the right to stay silent and what I say can be used against me? 28. name something you can’t wait for: getting to the last answer and post it, because I can vividly see myself accidentally closing this page by accident when I’m in the middle of it and curse in all the languages I can curse in (credits to Lewis) 29. when was the last time you saw your mom: Today. 31. what are you listening to right now: Il più grande spettacolo dopo il big bang - Jovanotti 32. have you ever talked to a person named tom: Does Tommaso from my elementary school count? 33. something that is getting on your nerves: Mosquitoes’ unrequited love for me. 34. most visited website: Wordreference.  35. hair colour: chestnut brown. 36. long or short hair: long. Should cut it but I have an hostile relationship with the hairdresser and by hostile I mean as soon as she sees me she wants to make half of my hair blond.  37. do you have a crush on someone: I’d describe it like an interest. 38. what do you like about yourself: My writer’s callus on my ring finger. I like you, little bump. 39. want any piercings: no, thanks. 40. blood type: You’d think a responsible adult would know. But I’m the kind of responsible adult who knows her Hogwarts House, not her blood type. 41. nickname: Franci, Fran, Pizza. 42. relationship status: As single as the last cookie that’s now looking at me from its bag. 43. zodiac: Sagittarius 44. pronouns: she 45. favourite tv show: currently Orphan Black, Broad City, Crashing, You’re the Worst 46. tattoos: no. 47. right or left handed: right.

48. surgery: Had a mole removed on my back. 49. piercing: no.  50. sport: I don’t know anyone called sport. 51. vacation: not in the near future. 52. pair of trainers: yes, I very much pair of trainers (?) MORE GENERAL 53. eating: I’ve heard of it. 54. drinking: “I love drinking! I have many friends drinking! How can I be drinking-phobic if I have friends drinking? Drinking are people!” 55. im about to: pee. Let me be honest, this is exactly what I’ll be doing after posting this.

56. waiting for: See above. 57. want: See above. 58. get married: If that happens, chances are a clone has replaced me. Look for me. Save me. Find me. 59. career: “I love career! I have many friends who career! How can I be career-phobic if I have career friends? Careers are people!”

WHICH IS BETTER 60. hugs or kisses: I very rarely do any of them (yes, I confess, even if I’m italian I rarely kiss, which brings me to think my italian citizenship is at risk. It’s a relief I love pasta), so if they happen, they must be very much felt. So I cannot choose. 

61. lips or eyes: Ice is better than leaps. 62. shorter or taller: Irrelevant 63. older or younger: acceptably mature 64. nice arms or nice stomach: nice coat of arms. 65. hook up or relationship: Uhm, something more significant than the former, but lighter than the latter... the 10 seconds What if relationship: we casually look at each other from across the street, the camera closes up on my eye, only to move on yours immediately after. In the span of 10 seconds, we imagine- no, wait, we do live the most incredible love story of the century. I can see it in your pupil, as it is just a mirror of mine: all the journeys we would make, all the laughters we would cause each other, all the stolen kisses, all the misunderstood words, all the mistakes and all the fights. In the time you need to breath in and breath out, a wonder comes and dies. And then, as fast as it came, the vision waves back and the camera steps away and we’re back to complete strangers whose eyes locked, by accident, on a random day, from across a street. You blink, I turn my head away and as we part, both of us think: “Oh god, what is wrong with me? Where the hell did that fantasy come from?”, but we will think of it again, of that odd odd time that we caressed but never touched, and never knew but surely met. Of that time that we have been our favorite What if. 66. troublemaker or hesitant: the space in between HAVE YOU EVER 67. kissed a stranger: no 68. drank hard liquor: yes 69. lost glasses/contact lenses: no, but I broke them. 70. turned someone down: yes 71. sex on the first date: no 72. broken someone’s heart: I’m afraid so 73. had your heart broken: viciously, but only by fate 74. been arrested: is this an invitation? 75. cried when someone died: yes 76. fallen for a friend: yes

DO YOU BELIEVE IN 77. yourself: I’ve come to the conclusion that chances are I exist, so I better believe in it. 78. miracles: It’s a miracle I’ve lost myself in all this babbling and I still didn’t go to pee. 79. love at first sight: Only strong fondness and strong dislike. 80. santa claus: Never.  81. kiss on the first date: If I believe in kiss on the first date? What kind of question is this? 82. angels: If they exist, they must be so happy to be put after the supernatural phenomenon of kisses on the first date. OTHER 83. current best friends name: Caterina, Roberta, Leonie, Carla.  84. eye colour: brown. If I wrote a dumb YA novel, I’d say chocolate brown, because I’d have to make it less boring. 85. favorite movie: Look, it’s 00:46 and I really need to use the toilet, so I’ll just come up with the first one that comes to mind and it is LadyHawke.

#i was tagged #personal