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megalony · 5 years

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Detox- part 2

The second part to my Roger Taylor series which I hope everyone is enjoying so far.

Permanent taglist: @lunaticspoem @butlegendsneverdie @langdonzvoid @jennyggggrrr @luvborhap @radiob-l-a-hblah @rogertaylorsbitontheside @chlobo6 @rogertaylors-lipgloss @sj-thefan @omgitsearly @bluutac @luckytrashgooprebel @scarsout @deaky-with-a-c @killer-queen-ofrhye

Series taglist: @killerqueenbucky @the-ridge-farm-raven

Warning: Mentions of drug use.

Series masterlist

Enjoy.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Rubbing a hand under her eyes, (Y/n) brushed away the tears that felt like acid burning into her features as she turned her back to the half a dozen people bustling about like bees in the corridor. Her feet picked up the pace as her left arm wrapped tightly around her lower chest as if trying to give herself a reassuring hug. As soon as her hand opened the door in front of her, (Y/n) turned her head to have a lasting glance over her shoulder at the situation that was getting out of hand now.

Her eyes widening like golf balls popping out of her sockets when Brian swiped his hand out at one of the media men standing in front of him with a camera. The equipment flew from the man's hands like a dove being set free, smashing into the wall on the left causing fragments of lense, wiring and plastic to scatter around them.

Pressing her back up against the door once it was safely closed, (Y/n) had the sudden urge to barricade the door.

Roger had been in an induced coma for four and a half hours, meaning that he had seven and a half more hours or thereabouts to stay in a vegetated state and let his system be flushed. He had two fluid tubes in his veins that were pumping solutes, vitamins and general IV molecules around his body which were counteracting the drugs and ridding them from his system. The temperature of the room was lowered to cooling point since he was still running a high fever and sweating through the bedsheets. His body was subtly shaking but in his sleep induced state he could feel no withdrawal effects which was what they wanted.

But the paparazzi had gotten wind that Roger was here and had snapped one or two pictures at most of him in his comatose state. They were shouting and murmuring and whispering headlines that clearly showed they were under the impression Roger had overdosed.

The band had tried telling them to leave and giving them false headlines but they weren't buying it. None of them wanted the media to print the headlines that Roger had overdosed because it wasn't true and that wouldn't be fair. Roger was here to get better, he wasn't here because he had decided that he needed too much heroin that had collapsed his system. They had no business flying around and pestering each of them and they had taken enough photos now. John had already talked to someone about getting security on this floor so no one could come down and hang around Roger's room or try and get pictures or information from the doctors and nurses treating him.

Brian had clearly broken one camera which showed he meant business and he would be starting another fight soon enough if no one backed away.

(Y/n) hadn't dared to read the newspapers when Roger threw one in the bin, looking calm but his voice gave away the rage building up inside of him showing that he wasn't best pleased they were writing about his drug use. They had no interest in the reason why Roger was taking drugs, they simply assumed that since he was in one of the best-known bands in the world, he took drugs for a laugh. If the papers had an article on the front page saying about how a random person was taking drugs because he had been in a car crash, no one would read it. People would skim over the article to find the 'interesting stuff'.

As soon as people saw Roger Taylor, Queen and Drugs, they were all over the papers like a rash. They read the information that contained false elements, they ate up the news and they regurgitated it to others with twists and turns in at every angle. People saw someone famous being human and making a mistake or being in pain and they criticised them for it. Roger was no different.

Collapsing down into the uncomfortable chair with the wooden armrests, (Y/n) let her head rest in her hand as her legs curled up beneath her. Every part of her head was pounding in pain as it was near enough eleven o'clock at night. She wanted to sleep desperately but she also wanted to be awake in case anything happened to Roger. She needed to keep an eye on him to calm herself down and reassure herself that he was going to be okay because she didn't know what she would do if he wasn't.

(Y/n) had spent the last few months arguing with Roger before eventually giving in.

She had shouted at him for doing something so stupid as to take drugs on a regular basis when she found out he was taking them at regular intervals throughout the day. She had screamed and threatened to leave him until the drummer broke down in sobs and told her that if he stopped taking the drugs he would feel like he was being murdered from the pain in his back. He had sobbed at her feet saying that he couldn't have her leave him but he couldn't stop taking the only thing that was making him feel like himself again. The only thing that was working for the pain he was going through.

How could (Y/n) leave the person she loved because he was taking something that was helping his pain?

So (Y/n) stayed and watched Roger fly higher than a kite in the breeze to help himself. She saw him start to take drugs when he was in the studio right in front of the boys. Roger let them watch him inhale the white powder and bounce back like he had refuelled on energy. He didn't care that they were mortified by the amount he was taking or that he was doing this on a regular basis. Then (Y/n) and the boys watched Roger backstage at one of their biggest concerts, snorting drugs to get him through it because when he tried to stop so he could have a clean show he nearly collapsed in agony.

And none of them said anything because Roger was in no pain and he was relaxed the more drugs that rushed through his veins.

But when the papers caught wind and got the confirmation they needed, suddenly everyone stepped up and told him no. They stopped standing back and feeding his addiction and each of them felt horrible because they were now only helping because they had been told to by Miami. They were helping now after feeding his addiction because people had found out. They should have helped earlier but they didn't and now they were rushing all at once to stop this.

(Y/n) didn't realise that she had fallen asleep until she was suddenly woken up by a sound that was rattling her eardrums until she wondered if she was going to go deaf.

Weakly opening her eyes to the light of the room, (Y/n) pushed herself to sit up straight as her vision focused on Roger, lying motionless on the bed just like he had always been. Due to the swelling he had the doctors decided to leave him laying on his side so he didn't apply any pressure so he was now facing (Y/n) as she sat in the chair.

Two nurses ran into the room followed by the doctor (Y/n) had come to know as doctor Lewis who was to be treating Roger. Their eyes never spared her one glance as they stared at the drummer who was now flatlining. A breathless, wordless sound escaped (Y/n)'s lips as she jumped to unsteady feet, desperate to do something but knowing she could do nothing. Her eyes watched as the nurses moved Roger so he was laying on his back which would undoubtedly apply unwanted pressure, especially if they left him like that.

Doctor Lewis wheeled over the crash cart as his mind went over the drill he had done so many times before. He had told (Y/n) and the band that this treatment came with risks. They were speeding up a process that took days so it only took half a day. They were flushing everything out of Roger's body and sending his body into distress because it wouldn't know what was happening.

His heart was going to go from having a rhythmic dose of heroin beating through with his blood to having nothing but pure plasma and blood cells going through. The organ was used to the added substance and now it was going to go from tainted to clean. Just like a window that was cleaned, a smear was always going to be left. Doctor Lewis told them he was at risk of going into cardiac arrest and now that was happening because Roger's body couldn't handle this. He couldn't go from having a variety of drugs over six months to being clean.

Three times.

(Y/n) counted three times under her breath that doctor Lewis had to press the padels to Roger's chest over where the nerves in his heart would be that sent the impulses to make the organ beat. It took three shocks, each one higher than the last, to get Roger's heart to work on its own again.

Each bolt of electricity made (Y/n)'s own body jump as if she were the one who was being electrocuted. Her arm tightened around her chest as her other hand pressed to her mouth to smother her cries. All she wanted was to take Roger back home. She wanted him to be okay and to go home with this put behind them as some sort of nightmare. But (Y/n) knew no matter how many times she wished, that was something which was never going to come true. When Roger awoke from his comatose state- if he did- then he was going to be subjected to tests and agony until they put him on morphine or something equivalent to take away his pain.

Then he would have to go through the pain of taking whatever legal painkillers they gave him and hope that they would be enough. He couldn't take any amount of heroin after this in case his body reacted in the wrong way. He would become less tolerable to the substance now that it was being flushed away like last night's dinner. If he took a small amount he could overload his system and potentially kill himself when all he wanted was to take the pain away.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ "Come on, Rog." The words came out as a whisper in the wind, slightly muffled against the back of Roger's hand that was pressed to (Y/n)'s lips. She was sitting on the very edge of the bed, John on her left in the chair she had previously vacated and Freddie sitting on her right on the other chair on the opposite side. Brian was standing beside Freddie, everyone feeling their hearts in their mouths that they couldn't swallow down because Roger wasn't awake yet.

His heart had not suffered another cardiac arrest which everyone had almost cried about in relief. He had gone through twelve and a half hours of extreme detox in a comatose state and the doctor had given him the medication that would slowly bring him back around. It could take anything up to twenty minutes to wake him up and it had been just over ten minutes since he had been given the medication.

There were security guards at either end of the ward Roger was on to make sure people coming onto this floor were either staff or here to see other patients on this floor. There were two more security guards outside Roger's room just in case to make sure no one could get in. The blinds were drawn so no pictures could be taken from passers-by. Roger was safe and secure in his room, they just needed him to wake up now.

Everyone held their breaths when they noticed Roger's eyelids begin to flutter like the first beats of a butterfly's wings. They saw the whites of his eyes as his pupils had rolled to the very back of his head.

Reaching a steady hand out, John pressed the emergency button as told to do when Roger started showing signs of waking up. Freddie leaned over and ever so gently removed the oxygen mask from Roger's lips and nose when he started to mumble. Not needing the force of oxygen which was only a precaution whilst he was unconscious. Moving her free hand, (Y/n) started to stroke his sweat-ridden hair from falling into his eyes. Moving the tangled and sticky strands as Roger's eyes finally rolled so that he could try and clear his hazy vision.

No one expected the reaction they received.

The most horrific, Earth-shattering scream tore from Roger's raw throat and battered against his teeth so hard they almost trembled in their gums. His head thrust back into the pillow as his back arched from the bed, every nerve in his body now beginning to spark to life.

Roger was not on medication. He had no heroin coursing through his veins, no morphine, tramadol, codeine, no trace of any drug, legal or illegal was in his system. This left the drummer defenceless against the horrific pain he had suffered before but it was so much worse now. Roger had gone six months taking all types of medication to rid himself from the pain, in the last four months he hadn't gone one day without taking something, more specifically without taking heroin. Now with being dextoxed they had taken him off everything but the saline and IV fluids to clear his system.

The nerves in his back were damaged, his spine was pressured by swelling and his muscles had been shredded. Even his heart felt like it was on fire and his skin was itchy and sore like he had been scorched by the worst heat burn he had ever had in his life.

Another tortured scream left Roger's lips as he tried to sustain his weight so his back was arched from the bed but he couldn't. He didn't have the energy to keep himself arched like he was trying to do yoga, the energy he had was running on low and it was being burnt out for the sounds escaping his lungs. When his back hit the bed, although it wasn't much of a distance, the mattress seemed to slam against the swelling that hadn't gone down because he hadn't been given anything to treat it.

Nothing but choked cries and ear-splitting whimpers of the worst kind of agony left Roger's lips as his back was on fire.

(Y/n) begrudgingly let go of Roger's hand, moving to stand by John's side so the doctor and nurse who entered the room could assess and see to Roger. But they couldn't properly assess him with the way he was writhing side to side and from how he screamed at them. Roger wasn't sure what he was saying but he hoped they could understand what he wanted and needed. They seemed to get the message he was conveying as they carefully turned him so he was lying on his left side which relieved some of the pressure but it didn't take away the pain.

"Make... it stop." Roger seethed through gritted teeth, his voice a low gravel sound but his eyes were something else entirely. Freddie had never seen the emotion that was being displayed in Roger's eyes as his pupils constricted. When he barely managed to open his eyes, Brian swore his iris' were a much darker shade of blue that was a navy colour verging on black.

Roger felt like a child throwing a tantrum when he didn't get his own way. His mind barely registering the doctor telling him he needed to be clean of all medication and drugs in order to run tests. How could they think leaving him in this condition was ethical or even the slightest bit okay?

Someone tried to touch him, maybe to calm him down, maybe to talk to him or even to move him. Their touch only resulted in their wrist becoming crushed under Roger's strong grip as he threw their hand away from him before he grabbed the sleeve of the doctor standing in front of him. Roger's trembling arm tugged on the sleeve to the point he was going to tear the material away as he groaned. His body was on fire but he was shaking. His back was breaking over and over again but they weren't helping him.

When the doctor leaned down to hear what Roger clearly wanted to say, Roger felt like he was going to pass out. He could feel the beads of sweat rolling down his forehead and trickling to the end of his nose where they jumped onto the sheets below. He could practically feel his skin heating up to a vibrant shade of red like he was becoming covered in rashes. Roger needed them to do something before he came around fully and tried to do something about this himself.

"Make it stop o-or kill me."

Roger was not living with the pain they refused to take away from him, he wasn't having this for one hour let alone over a day. If they couldn't take it away from him he wanted to die.

#roger taylor #roger taylor imagine #roger x reader #imagine #queen band #freddie mercury #john deacon #Brian May #detox

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cruddyborderlandstheories · 5 years

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athenas or the new ign videos... hmmm

im gonna go for the ign videos (moze gameplay and sanctuary-iii, no guns yet, i have a reason for that) because athenas hasn’t gotten its sweet instagram video yet. once that’s released i’ll do a full post on it. by the time i got around to finishing this post, they had released the video. oh boy... gonna do the gun post then the athenas post, i think. alright, off we go.

tl;dr: we read the entire end user agreement DAHL thrusts upon us for using the ECHO device, talk about some stuff like how (spoilers) it seems like Lilith will be getting her powers back at the end of the game, and a voice line Lily says that sounds like “Tyreen took my powers. it’s like Tannis said: [inaudible] Siren” (altho im not 100% sure on the [inaudible] part because 1) it sounds weird and 2) there’s a drum beat and also the devs are talking over her, the Siren part seems fairly accurate because of the way her mouth moves). so you know. im gonna be agonizing over that until i can hear what she says. ive already spent an hour just repeating it over and over. i nearly fell asleep lol

we’re gonna start with the moze gameplay (the first 14 minutes of bl3) because chronologically it’s first in both timeline and release date

i love the license plates on the right there

also it looks like they added in claptrap’s old welcome sign from windshear waste! time to stand in front of it for 30 minutes to see if any messages pop up like bl2

fast travel station as well, definitely going to see if/where i can teleport and going there immediately. i imagine this is more for DLC stuff and grinding tho.

also! i do believe we saw Covenant Pass previously. good to know this is actually where it is!

Marcus saying “And Welcome to Pandora!” in the beginning confirms that, yes, they’re going to be on a bus!! i wonder if there will be a fight scene before that though. it’s interesting Clappy mentions that “those jerks who tried to murder you are the children of the vault!” so i mean... there’s gotta be... right?

im also convinced this intro is going to be a mirror of Borderlands 1. i stg if it starts out with the first few notes of Ain’t No Rest for the Wicked and then swaps songs I’m going to lose my mind

also also, the order is totally going to mimic the bl1 one. Fl4k = Mordecai, Amara = Lilith, Moze = Roland, Zane = Brick. We even have Lilith taking Angel’s spot as the mysterious voice in our heads, and probably Marcus driving, AND being dropped off at a bus stop.

bet the reason they changed it from ‘Moze as the Bot Jock’ to ‘Moze as the Gunner’ is because it fits under ‘Roland as the Soldier’ better. Also, ‘Zane Flynt as Himselfs’ would be a play off ‘Brick as Himself’. Amara as the Siren is obvious, and ‘Mordecai as the Hunter’ vs ‘Fl4k as the Beastmaster’ is pretty similar as well, given Fl4k has all those Hunter skills.

the 4 basic emotes im guessing. im so glad we have the option to boop our friends in the face with emotes.

also moze’s little bunny skin is adorable

the ECHOnet used to be called “Riftspace”, “the Spline”, and... “MercTel: A Cyber-Dahl Joint” lmfao

specifically calls out Pandora. also, “artificial megastructures”??? THAT’S SO COOL

AND FUCKING

SENTIENT MEGASTRUCTURES????

gearbox. please. i have never ever wanted anything more in my life. please. it’s probably my birthday. PLEASE GEARBOX

also interesting that the user agreement specifically notes ‘Respawns’. I assume this is a joke because New-U stations have been confirmed not canon

“Core law”. Core law? Core... daddy? ... ????

core as in like a core government somewhere that’s not the border worlds? that’s interesting...

“The Legion”, okay, acknowledging TPS, that’s dope

“Project Blackrakk” ... im interested

“Thresher Company” lmao

im curious if Axton was apart of any of the mentioned ones. i don’t think it’s been stated, but i could be wrong

“Chieftain Oort”. also ‘Recently Legless Gary’, lmfao poor dude.

oh yeah im sure this is fine. also holy shit did they google the synonyms for ‘change’ and just start listing them? lmfao

“implicit subscription to the Digby Vermouth ‘Dig’s Gigs’ secret concert subscription service”

sorry, what?

if this doesn’t come up again in the future- if we don’t get a spam letter or 3 in our mailbox about this concert subscription thing i'm gonna be so disappointed

Dahl hates you if you’re not a fan of hyper-jazz, “you snob” lmfao

my brain hurts, they’re good at writing these

damn phones exist? i thought everything was ECHO. aight, that’s good to know. i guess there just aren’t any phone networks around the border worlds

also “shared dreamspaces” sound really cool

hm. that’s no good lmfao. also i love that the buttons are ‘Agree’ and ‘OK’. there is no escape, once you agree, you can’t even leave because you’re agreeing that you’re trapped with these rules even if you cancel.

that’s fucked up, DAHL. can’t believe you treat your user base the same way you treat your employees. i guess i shouldn’t be surprised.

anyway, shoutout to literally the only TOA I’ve ever fully read in my life.

also, clicking through this TOA too fast WILL end claptrap’s voice line early. so be careful if you want to hear what he has to say!!

oh shit lmao I gotta go edit that Fl4k post

ok im back ~time magic of being able to save things in drafts and post them at a later date~

sliding preserves momentum, so you can actually slide (nearly) the entire way down! i love this.

small, but claptrap bends his antennae when trying to be stealthy. i thought that was a pretty cool detail

“and some guns include an alternate shooting mode~! try it out!”

player: `immediately shoots claptrap in the face`

i died lol

a very nice look at this sign.

good to know that the twins really are tempting people to join with promises of food. i mean it makes sense, i imagine most of the cultists are desperate for stability and a reasonable life on pandora.

also, Shiv calls himself “holy influencer of the children of the vault” lol. i love that. gearbox really is going for the internet’s throat, isn’t it?

i do like that hovering over an NPC will give you their name only and not name/healthbar.

a better look at one of the signs referencing the Mother!!! i was waiting for this, the only real look we got at one was in that one scene with Moze and IB

“Behold the Mother strength surrender to the truth”

yeah that’s not ominous...

i assume the mother and father are intended to be tyreen and troy? but idk how i feel about that implication...

i like the new little gear/spring effect for the magnet lol

new lilith! i know a lot of people don’t like it, but i do. she looks better than the bl2 vers. altho i think it’s weird they swapped both bl1 and bl2′s ‘AI’ effect to those dots and then didn’t bring it to BL3. the dots effect felt cleaner. curious why they’re not applying it to bl3 when they went thru all that effort in 1 and 2.

... back up please.

i like that there is a changing icon for long pressing now

“time to check out our slay of the day!” sounds like Tyreen but tbh i legit thought this was moze’s reaction to opening the chest at first lol

you can hear someone start screaming in agony while she’s walking up the stairs, so i know it’s not moze, but im so used to the VHs talking when they see a new piece of loot my brain just assumed.

also THE MUSIC IN THE BACKGROUND IS A REMIX OF BANDIT SLAUGHTER!!! IM SO HAPPY ABOUT THIS I WAS FREAKING OUT THE FIRST TIME I HEARD IT

also, claptrap when dropping health yells “this could save your life! then, you’ll owe me a life debt!” bullshit im pretty sure you already decided we owed you a life debt the moment we stepped off that bus

“i see it... the great vault” - a line from a cultist you kill

i know i mentioned in this post that the Great Vault may be already opened, but it could also just be a Vault they’re planning on opening and using the propaganda to convince the cultists to help them find it.

“if you help us get this vault open, you’ll be handsomely rewarded! you’ll get superpowers! you’ll get regular meals! you’ll get money and guns and dates!” you know, the usual stuff.

either way, elevating the Vault to a higher state (god/heaven/whatever) makes sense if you’re running a cult.

btw there is a hidden chest in the scaffolding to the left of the door, if you’re interested in grabbing some better guns before shiv. personally, i’ll be using the toy guns.

also the TVs are actually playing propaganda now!!

this one is asking questions that i cant understand due to the sound effects of the chest and claptrap talking, but it says something about “... the dust? ... join the Children of the Vault!”

“hey shiiiiiv all your dumb friends are dead!!”

shiv be like

“all my friends are dead”

some cool level-up art! I notice these are the same pictures as used on the japanese site. i wonder if they change depending on which VH you’ve picked (If you’re playing Amara/Fl4k, do you get pics of Amara and Fl4k? the player is playing moze, afterall).

also also “it’s a KIA on the knife wielding maniac. suuuper dead.”

it’s cool that the VHs have specific lines for the deaths of bosses. i hope that continues and it’s not just a ‘15 min of intro gameplay’ thing. you know, where everything is super detailed in the beginning and then slowly gets less and less as the game progresses? anyway, moze’s little chuckle is fuckin adorable lol

ah. the door closes now so you can’t even explore Shiv’s room before Lilith shows up. gearbox plS you know me too well, i was looking for a g l i m p s e

claptrap’s voice line for getting released is SUPER off time, he hits the ground before going “you did it! i’m sa-ahhhhhhhh!” it’s weird, wondering if that’s just a glitch.

also also we get a nice listen to the revive ally sound. i could’ve sworn it wasn’t in the first look at this mission we got, because i heard it for the first time during the coop Zane/Amara gameplay on Promethea. i might be wrong, tho.

im very curious what these symbols are claptrap is beaming up

i mean you know what im gonna say

they look eridian

and they do

so wtf clappy why u beaming up eridian letters to Lilith

i assume maybe Tannis gave clappy some weird upgrade or something so he could communicate with the crimson raiders without the CoV listening in? it could be that Tannis or someone is decoding this message since Tannis does know how to translate Eridian (as shown in her bl1 ECHOs)

... or at the very least she gave Lilith a translator

the darkening makes it so that you can see the crackening. also this COULD just be a beam that lilith can see from wherever she is, but i want to believe there’s more eridian stuff. bc eridian stuff is fun.

this is so fu cking crisp im dying i love it

lilith’s tattoos spreading down her fingers

same symbol as her chest tattoo. maybe the symbol denotes new powers? like how lily has one on her chest for phasewalking, and a new one on her hand for teleportation

i love how her wings look like actual fire. i fucking love this

lilith is looking so fucking good in the new engine

im glad they got rid of her super red eyes, tbh it looked a bit weird

i think they are really pushing her fire affinity, im sure we’ll see Maya has an elemental affinity as well (im calling corrosive) and im sure Tyreen will too (slag). Amara looks to be Shock because that’s her ‘default’, but who knows until (if) bl4 comes out. but corrosive wings on maya would look SOOO fucking cool. please. please please please.

god she looks so good compared to bl2. i love how the tattoos softly glow in the dark, too. i gotta play this mission late in the day...

“you’re... the voice in my head, right?” i love this so much, i really hope my shitpost comes true.

lilith gives you a grenade mod for completing her mission! im really glad they are PUSHING through the tutorial/intro so you can get right into the game. bl2′s ‘intro’ of all these tutorials was brutal. especially waiting to unlock your action skill.

in 3 you get your action skill automatically at level 2!!! which is insane, i love it! they’re jumping right into it, it’s great. and they seem to be pushing for you to get all the stuff you need right away.

it’s curious to note that in bl3 we get our class mods at the end of the Promethea demo (after Gigamind), since in bl2 you get your first (usually?) after the hunting the firehawk mission and both seem to take place immediately after we get to the ‘base of operations’ of the game (Sanctuary vs Sanctuary-III).

yep that quest is 100% in line with the quest marker.

i imagine From the Ground Up may be discovering where the Vault Map/Key actually is? maybe bringing people to the Recruitment Center (notably Tannis)

for this scene. i hope this takes place after the HBC, because i seriously... can’t imagine the twins showing up, taking the Vault Map, bringing it to the HBC, and then NOT taking Lilith’s powers/trying to kill Lily and accidentally taking her powers. it just doesn’t make sense, Vault Hunters be damned, we are level 2 they could melt us easy peasy.

If anything, it feels like we COULD find the Vault Map in the Recruitment Center, Tannis tries to activate it/fix it, we find out it’s mega broke, and then the Sun Smashers show up and take it. but i seriously can’t imagine Lilith nor the new VHs allowing that to happen while they’re still there. maybe if Tannis sends us to do something while Lilith is gathering other CR members? then it could make sense if they attack while Tannis is alone with the Key...

we end up finding something in Shiv’s room that shows/helps us realize the Sun Smashers bringing the Vault Map to the Calypsos. tho this would mean the quest From the Ground Up is SUPER short and I imagine it’s not. Maybe we raid a camp of theirs like the one in front of Sanc-III with the bridge/ramp? We need to be about level 6 before we go and we start From the Ground Up at 2 so there’s obviously something DEEP we’re missing here. maybe this is a mission where we go gather the other Crimson Raiders? HMMMMMMMM...

.... oh.

nevermind lmfao

she opens her ECHO immediately after this LOL i feel kinda dumb now

raiding their camp it is! the Droughts sounds like a fun location. Very much like the dust. you guys think there’s a Shade situation going on there? i’m excited to see it. Still think we’re going to use Shiv’s room to get that lead, though. i just really wanna watch tv lmfao. i hope this means the bandits run from the camp to the HBC, or we find info that the bandit warchief sent a party to the HBC with the Vault Map. either way, i just don’t want the twins showing up until after the HBC or i will have so many questions. “why didn’t you kill lilith?” being the first. “the god queen wants her head!” ur goddamn right she does, so why doesn’t she (try to) kill lilith???

85% already?! hot damn

also

that’s one badass description there, Moze

also also

while having gun slots locked is pretty normal, im surprised they’re locking class mods and relics, too! i wonder when we’ll be able to equip relics. maybe when we first go to eden-6 or smth. or maybe after we meet up with Rhys. shit maybe he’s just handing us an artifact (im gonna interchange these a lot, sorry!) in that Promethea video lmfao

“ready to chuck some boom and frag some maniacs” lol moze i love you

if you’re playing Zane... `equips grenade mod for checkmark` `immediately equips second action skill and never actually uses grenade mod`

“it’s the firehawk! the god queen wants her head!”

like i alluded to before, i would not be surprised if Tyreen doesn’t know she can absorb Siren powers... when she goes to succ lilith in front of Sanctuary-III, it’s totally possible she actually was trying to kill her. That could explain why she looks so intrigued at her hand like “oh shit okay lets see what this can do”

might be why she was okay with sending her cultists after her instead of showing up herself.

“alright, we got a foothold. maybe things are turning our way. come on killer, you’re with me” we are going to explore the SHIT out of shiv’s room.

alright alright alright

let’s move on to the Sanctuary-III stuff

yessss

i love the quest objective thing, it looks like we will be able to swap through our quests with the push of a button! also im curious why exactly we’re going to promethea right away. i wonder if the twins say something about moving there after getting the vault map/lilith’s powers, or if we hear from rhys. im expecting something about the vault map, since our vh will admit they don’t know rhys at all when talking to lorelei. but for some reason we need to be within the city limits? since lily says ellie got us within the city limits.

hmmmmmm. okay, okay, maybe the map was trying to lead us to promethea for vault reasons during that short amount of time that we had it and it was working. maybe promethea is what we see when tannis is activating the key during that one cutscene? ohhh shit how dope would it be if we got that fucking easter egg message? omg “Children of the Vault. Come to Promethea. We are not on Pandora anymore. Tannis is not what she seems. Do not open the Vaults.” and everyone is like ‘uh did that thing just mention Tannis by name??’ and now it’s REALLY important to get the map back just so we can figure out wtf it’s trying to tell us.

i will question how ‘Tannis is not what she seems’ would affect character relationships, especially if it’s said so early in the game. so perhaps we only hear the first part of the message. maybe it’s corrupted because it was recently broken. iunno. just playing around with ideas. the canon of this game is like flarp putty until sept. 13th

anyway moving on because this is literally the first f r a m e of the video

i like that you can see pandora’s eridian scar. if the destroyer is speaking through eridium to people, it’s gonna bust outta the side of this planet like you wouldn’t fucking believe lmao. eridium is a window to the soul and if you stare long enough into its glossy, shining sides, the destroyer stares back

that or it’s just like a beacon, slowly spreading its influence across the universe. but i like the idea that the destroyer can waltz out of a big enough hunk of eridium. so it will bust out of pandora’s eridium scar. F in chat for pandora but also lmfao the amount of tentacles and rage would be unparalleled.

reality is that the twins are probably farming this scar for eridium to turn into slag for multiple purposes. like brainwashing their cultists, giving them powers, and ensuring their guns have their manufacturer’s quirk (im getting to this in my next post bc im just gonna compile all the ign gun videos into one big post)

the floor art is different from the actual sanc-iii demo. i mention this first in my behind closed doors panel analysis, but im gonna mention it again because this is ~official~. the floor list on the first walkthru of sanc-iii we got had the names of all the crimson raiders and lines leading to their shops. so we had the infirmary/tannis, marcus, moxxi, etc listed on the floor. i imagine this new sanc-iii will change as we get more people on board or if we do a sort of re-decoration of the ship.

also also, it’s cool to see that we have 4 rooms on the minimap, likely one for each of the VHs (and your coop buddies). ive seen speculation that the other, non-played VHs will hang out in their rooms when you’re not playing them, and tbh i really hope this is the case.

we also know this version of sanctuary-iii is after pandora, so there are no promethea citizens aboard yet. which makes me double certain the first sanc-iii video we got takes place either after endgame (explaining why Lily has her tattoos back) or right after Athenas (explaining why Maya is there). which... i mean... spoilers, guys.

that’s one good lookin fast travel station, holy shit

im in tears over here because “Caution: no steppy”. this is so fucking funny to me

no steppy on me

okay moving on because i will cry laugh over this for forever im allowed

moze’s room is so much different than amara’s

also i notice she’s on the left of the two on the top, which makes me hope the other 4 are reserved for the other VHs (or your coop buddy).

compared to the official sanc-iii demo video

and amara’s room

moze’s is so barren oh my god

someone get this girl like... a colorful throw pillow or something

baaank. also doubles as the secret stash. kinda upsetting, because that is infinitely less loot i can store when i make a lot of characters. also if i upgrade the bank once, is it upgraded across all my other characters too? or are the guns i put in storage slot 11 locked up until i buy the upgrade?

either way, i am saddened because no more mule characters. and way less space the more characters you make and more gear you find, because all gear you put in here is there across all characters. i hope this means our backpacks will be a lot bigger this time around!

supamax mfg shows up again

ppm/04-02 matches up with the number behind the fast travel station. i wonder if this will come into play. if the number changes later in-game im going to freak the fuck out bc that means wherever we are isn’t actually sanctuary-iii

ppm/04-02. remember that 👀

also, the wall behind the golden chest changed from red to steel/greenish. can’t tell the actual color. same as the floor

you know. that color.

“golden keys are popular. you can get some in-game and also get them online”

in-game you say??? im interested! i wonder if there will be some sort of arena (like moxxi’s) where if you complete it you get a key as a reward. i saw people speculating about some sort of randomized boss rush, that could definitely be a way to get gold keys, as well.

oooo engine room! im excited to explore here.

original size is 16. so, we have 40 backpack slots! still... you know... only 1 above the max of bl2, but hey. at least that’s an upgrade. as small as it may be

on the bright side: bank upgrades increase capacity by 5. with a base of 10, and 8 upgrades, we have 50 slots to fill. which is a big leap from the original 24. it is still a shame we have to share these across characters, tho

offline cultist stream? makes me think the CoV really was trying to steal/take over sanc-iii from the crimson raiders and we went to go take it (back?) in Taking Flight. either the CoV found/ordered Sanc-III, or the crimson raiders were building it/fixing it up, their stronghold got taken over, and the CoV were prepping it for takeover.

the shooting range. and if you notice that little CoV symbol in the bottom left there? yeah pretty much backs up my previous theory

all those red bits are tied to ellie’s crew challenge. so we’ll be collecting things for her!

an altar for scooter 😢

“we’re gonna get those cultism sumbitches, believe you me”

where you get yeeted out of Sanc-III. im definitely going to try jumping in it to see if it kills me. doesn’t look like the drop pods are available yet

that’s not clappy, pretty sure he’s hanging out on the bridge right now

schematics for veronica

the thing i was most excited about in this video!

loooots of customizations! which excites me because i know eridium used to get useless late game when you’ve grinded all the raid bosses. it looks like eridum is going to be in ultra high demand. but u can bet ur ass im gonna be unlocking all those fucking customizations asap.

veteran rewards is also super super interesting

hgggggg i wanna know what the shields do!!!

i like the vault symbol at the top of the item card as well, shows you its a special type of weapon/item. im honestly surprised we’re able to buy ‘veteran rewards’ so early in the game? i mean obvi we won’t have enough eridium (look at the costs!) but it’s wild it’s even accessible. im personally a fan of the first bonus ‘anointed: gain life steal on action skill end’

looks like these guns have been chosen

to give them those special bonuses

i do see that just anointed is not class specific, but the ones that say anointed gunner or maybe anointed siren will be (confirmed by the devs in video).

you pay with eridium, so maybe the vending machine has some way to confer the power of eridium to the guns. or some shit. iunno. it’s possible this won’t be available until the end of the game, hence veteran rewards, and is only being shown to us right now since this is a showcasing video.

pandoran civilian. no promethea civilians today folks! i am CONVINCED that the old sanc-iii demo takes place after the end of the game. at least after athenas.

it’s weird seeing moxxi hanging outside her bar.

is also cool to know that the 4 slot machines are actually available. seems like npcs can play them, but we can use all 4 if we want to. which is really nice

the one on the far left is called the ‘loot boxxer’ and it gives mostly guns lol. i see they are taking jabs. good for them

better pic of the leftmost machines

Zer0 seems to have a bounty board? not sure if this is like a physical bounty board or if they will contact you when they want something dead, but it is cool to note. this isn’t shown in video, just the devs speaking about it.

similarly hammerlock has ‘big game hunts’ where you find “rare, challenging creatures” and kill them for him

apparently we’ll be killing something known as a manvark

this book

i fucking recognize this book

HAMMERLOCK NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

in all seriousness tho

hammerlock probably isn’t in his room because we haven’t rescued him from eden-6 yet.

a cool thing about the crew challenges: as you progress through the game and do these challenges, sanc-iii will ‘grow and change to reflect the things you’ve accomplished’. altho another dev says “sometimes these are optional things, like challenges”

so now im like oh shit we’re gonna change sanc-iii as we play the game. i wonder if that means we’ll be changing the hull, too. because you know. the blue paint job. we gotta go STEALTH. sneaky beaky into the calypsos fleety

tannis doesn’t have the saurian on her table. also, interesting note, she DOES have the eridian log in the corner. meaning she must have had that before eden-6. interesting... maybe we’ll find more on Pandora.

she is still covered in blood tho. idk i don’t have an explanation for that. don’t think i want to think of one, to be quite honest.

oh no. (those are skulls next to all the gurneys)

“tannis plays a much bigger role in bl3 than she has in past games”. bigger than borderlands 1? that is... impressive. she’ll be running the health vending machines (which is weird bc i could’ve sworn in the promethea demo, zed was still running them... hm.)

another angle of sanc-iii

clappy? you good there?

the devs said they’re using him to plug a hole. i assume the calypsos shot at the ship as we’re leaving or smth.

lily with no tattoos, who also looks significantly more pissed than her other sanc-iii demo counterpart

you know. because she got her tattoos.

also

fucking

lilith says something right here. all i can make out is “Tyreen took my powers. it’s like tannis said. ..... [inaudible] Siren.” maybe some weird word i haven’t heard before? i swear she’s saying ‘like tannis said: a ‘m...’ Siren” but i am not 100% sure. if someone could help me out, that’d be rad.

so its sounding like lilith rushed in with explicit warning from tannis about tyreen stealing her powers, and tannis knew tyreen was some sort of Siren and warned lily, but lily didn’t listen. it could also be that lily is saying something like “im not a siren” but i can’t really hear it if she is. it sounds like she saying a word that starts with m to me. if someone could help me with this i’d owe you my life

whew. i am. fucking TIRED.

im gonna sleep for like 3 hours and then wake up and make food before the fl4k streams start.

#borderlands #bl3 #borderlands 3

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sunstainedpages · 6 years

Text

The Barrel Of Her Gun Pt.2

Look At Me

Natasha x reader

Words: 1435

AN: This is the second part to The Barrel Of Her Gun series. One or two tears may have been shed. I’m really like writing this. The third part may not be out for a little while since I’m going away for a couple of days and then life gets crazy after that. Enjoy!💖

Pt.1 Relief Pt.3 Bad Dream

You wake up in a bright hospital room; a huge contrast to the cell you’d been holed up in. Sitting up, you can feel the IV drip that was coming from your hand; not remembering how you got here you started to call out. “Hey. Someone. Please I’d like to speak to someone,” and as if on queue the room flooded with doctors and nurses. Their words were spinning around your head and you couldn’t understand a single thing. Looking up you notice Tony; Steve and Bucky stood around your door; your eyes instantly light up.

After numerous tests, the doctors turn to leave and the avengers shuffle in. Awkward silence follows. “I uh guess you guys deserve an explanation.” You mumble now not daring to look at any of them. Gingerly, Tony sits on the edge of your bed and places a hand on your knee; you’ve always seen Tony as a father figure ever since you’d been found by the avengers.

You remember that day so clearly; the day that your life changed, and you became happy; the day Iron Man carried your nearly lifeless body and made sure you had the best help to nurse you back to health.

Steve takes a step towards you, “Y/N while we understand why you sacrificed yourself, it…it frustrated us because we could’ve and would’ve found another way; a way that didn’t involve you having to leave.”

Tony buts in… ”at the end of the day we are just happy you’re home kiddo.”

A small smile graces your lips, “I know that there might possibly have been a different solution, but I didn’t want to risk it,” you glance at Bucky, “I know what Hydra can do, the damage they will cause when they want something…” Bucky clears his throat.

“Y/N I understand that. Out of everyone here I understand the most why you wouldn’t want to risk it. But we are team and more importantly we are family. It’s taken me a while to accept that, accept the fact that you must risk it. You must risk losing the people you love, to stay with the people you love; and Y/N I don’t know if you’ve noticed but we aren’t the average people. We aren’t that easy to get rid of” Bucky chuckles and you feel at ease once again.

They sit with you for a couple of hours; talking; laughing and catching you up on everything you’d miss. Being surrounded by the two super soldiers and Tony you almost forget about the fact that you hadn’t seen Natasha; she hadn’t come to make sure you were ok. Your mood shifts; from the happy bubbling self you were five minutes ago; now your eyes were full of longing and a forced smile was plastered on your lips. The guys notice and decide you need some time alone, Bucky’s the first to leave, giving you a small nod as he exists. Tony places a kiss on your forehead “chin up kiddo” he murmurs as he heads out of the room. Only you and Steve were left in the hospital room, Steve places a hand on your shoulder “give her some time Y/N. I know it’s hard but you’ll both get through this,” and with that he takes his leave.

Sighing, you lean back on your pillows and cry, letting the waves of emotions crash into you and drowning in your thoughts. Every day was the same; you woke up; and then whichever team member was free would come sit with you and then they’d leave. Leave you even more broken and destroyed then you were when the rescued you a week ago.

It was your last night in the hospital before you got discharged back to the compound, and you were dreading it. “Ugh” you scream as you sit up in the hospital bed. “WHY WHY WHY? Why won’t she come see me” you break down into sobs, “I need to see her” You weren’t talking to anyone, there wasn’t anyone around to talk to. You were glad there wasn’t as you continued to cry yourself to sleep.

The next morning rolled around, you were up bright and early signing the papers to get you out of the hospital. Walking towards the elevators that led to the compound you were greeted by Tony, “hey kiddo’ he ruffled your hair “looking forward to being back?”

Smiling back at him, you nod, “can’t wait to get back to normality.” Though you had a sneaking suspicion things would be far from normal. You both step inside the elevator, “Hey F.R.I.D.A.Y.”

“Hello Miss Y/L/N. It’s good to see you back.” F.R.I.D.A.Y says, “the rest of the team are in the kitchen.”

“Ok. Thanks. I’ll head down there later” you say stepping out and heading towards your bedroom. Pushing open your door, you enter to see your room was exactly as you left it; or maybe even tidier. Deciding not to waste anytime you head for a shower, after not being able to shower for four and a half months, the hot water was a very nice welcome. “I’m never taking showering for granted ever again.” You chuckle to yourself as you step out of the on suite and into your bedroom. Finding a comfy pair of sweatpants and a baggy t-shirt you contemplate whether to face Natasha today. ‘The irony. I’m an avenger, I face scary things and run into danger on a daily basis. But I’m more scared to face my girlfriend.’ You think to yourself. Making up your mind, you ask F.R.I.D.A.Y to ask Nat to meet you in your room. “if I don’t do this now I’ll never do it” you murmur to yourself as you wait for the red-headed assassin.

Jumping, at the harsh knock that land on your door, you shake yourself out of your thoughts. As calmly as you can you walk towards the door; opening it slowly. Mumbling a quiet “hey” you step aside and let her in. “I uh guess we need to talk” you laugh nervously not really knowing how to start.

“Yeah. I guess.” Natasha says bluntly as she sits down in the armchair you have in the corner of the room. Sitting on the bed opposite her, you look at her face; eyes that no longer shine a bright emerald green; the dark bags that sit underneath them. Watching her movements, you notice how everything is slow and forced; how she looks like a shell of the woman you love. Usually you could read her like an open book; you’d spent so much time together; the assassin had finally let her walls down. Not anymore. The walls you’d spent so long taking down had been rebuilt higher and stronger. Staring at your girlfriend now all you could see was a stone-cold expression.

“Nat. I know you are mad. You have every right to be. But please look at me.” You pause hoping to catch her gaze but to no avail. “I didn’t think I had a choice. I didn’t want Hydra to hurt you or the rest of the team. I don’t know what I could do with myself if they hurt you or worse. Natasha please. I’m sorry…”

“Would you make the same decision again?” Natasha asks, not evening moving her gaze from the window.

The question shocked you “No? No. If I was put in that position again, I would make the same decision. I would sacrifice myself again to protect you. I’d do anything to protect me.”

“Y/N I don’t want you to protect me. I wanted you here with me. I’d much rather face the consequences of Hydra with you by my side then you sacrificing yourself. I don’t get how you couldn’t see that, I’d face anything if I had you by my side.”

Natasha’s outburst shocked you. “I’m sorry Nat. I guess I just wanted to be a hero. I wanted to save everyone,” you sigh; running your fingers through your hair, “but I’m here now.” Looking up at her, you’d thought maybe you had gotten through to her. Apparently not.

“I’m sorry Y/N” Natasha says, and you can hear the crack in her voice, she heads towards your door.

“Natasha. Please. Please don’t walk away. Please don’t walk away without looking at me” you whimper as she closes your door. “Just look at me!” you scream at the now empty room. Sinking down onto your bed; you curl up and let the tsunami of tears pour out of your eyes.

You sacrificed yourself to save the woman you love, but in the end, you just lost her.

#natasha romanoff #natasha romanoff imagine #natasha romanoff x reader #wlw #wlw imagine #bucky x reader #steve x reader #tony x reader #avengers #avengers imagine #avengers x reader #black widow #black widow imagine

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slashersteve · 6 years

Text

Forgotten Love Letter 💌

pairing: Peter Parker/Gender Neutral Reader

summary: Peter discovers a letter you had intended to give him in freshman year of high school before you started dating.

warnings: mentions of blood

note: I got inspired by letter writing in numerous fics I’ve been running into and tatbilb ofc 💕 enjoy :)) first imagine ive written in over 2 decades, it’s been sitting in my drafts for that long too- now she’s out here in the world thank u thank u

•••

The school week was officially over, and you could finally relax over the weekend. It had been an exhausting week with numerous amount of homework (it’ll be this way in college get used to it now teachers said or claimed) You still had homework, but it wouldn’t be due until the end of the next week, so Saturday was officially for you.

Your boyfriend of a year had promised you two would hang out at your place and watch a movie, but after his nightly activities. You knew Peter was Spider-man, an internet sensation everyone was crazy about including yourself. The only way you found out is because Peter has never been great at keeping secrets. He saw you on the street one time, and just waved, “Hey (y/n)!” He yelled, completely forgetting he was Spider-Man and not another high school student who can nonchalantly say hi to their significant other. You were hella confused and had awkwardly waved back, recognizing his voice but not quite sure if you heard it right.

It took you all night before you had put two and two together. From those late nights he wouldn’t answer your texts or would answer your text, weird bruises and aches he sometimes had, and his ability to climb through your window despite the fire escape being farther away from your 7th floor bedroom. And his voice. You quickly got to work and went to school the next day wearing custom made Spider-Man gear to see if he catches on that you know and he looked completely touched by the fact you were wearing it.

“Did you- figure it out when I said hi to you?” Peter asked one day underneath the bleachers during lunch before Ned came to join you two. You had smirked and said, “I thought the point of the mask was for people to not know who you are, especially the ones you know.” He blushed of embarrassment and you kissed him on the cheek and said, “Secrets safe with me...” with a wink.

It was after that when Peter would come to you after nearly every night patrol he did, he’d come into your room in the full suit to tell you about his day, what he had done, what kind of crime he fought and other times he’d come when he’s injured. Those were the nights that worried you the most and made you lecture him on being much, much more careful. You didn’t care if he’d heal fast- he’s not invincible.

You hadn’t expected him in early today though, knowing he was spending the entire day with his Aunt May before going on “patrol”. So you spent most your Saturday laying sround, sleeping on and off and texting Peter. Your mom was out all day working and you didn’t expect your dad home till the next morning because he’d just left for the graveyard shift. You were bored out of your mind after every favorite movie was watched and decided to clean up the mess in your room you ignored the past week.

An hour of picking up and vacuuming later, you then decided to organize your closet. That’s when you found it- a medium sized white wooden jewelry box with flower and swan designs on it your mother had gifted to you when you were eight. After putting all your clothes back and some in a box, you sat down on your bed, legs crossed as you wound up the music and then opened the box, the melody of Swan Lake playing the moment you lifted the lid. You smiled at the swan figurine that slowly spun along to the music. A feeling of nostalgia bursted through you as you were reminded of being a child, humming the tune wherever you went and drawing swans randomly. Your eyes shifted to look at the contents inside, letting the music continue to play.

There was anything but jewelry in there, In there was instead a few notes you and your best friend from middle school used to give each other, filled with silly stuff and inside jokes. There was even old letters from a pen pal you had in 5th grade! Her name was Elizabeth and she was from the UK. About a half hour had passed with you reading through them when you eyes caught the light pink, folded paper that was at the very bottom. You picked it up, setting the others aside.

You flipped it around, not remembering what the letter was, what it contained or who it was for right until you saw the name “Peter Parker” with a heart around it. Instantly your eyes widened, the happy nostalgic memories being replaced with the cringey memory of that one afternoon on the bus ride home writing out your feelings for your new friend from Science class. You felt your cheeks heat up at the memory, and slowly small tidbits of what you wrote were coming back to you.

Just as you moved to open it, there was a sudden loud knock on your window. You jumped in your spot, the letter falling from your hand and you turned to see the man himself in his Spider-Man suit, waving at you and pointing at the window asking you to let him in. Instantly you relaxed and quickly shoved the letters back into the box and shut it, the room becoming silent.

Hopping to your feet, you went to unlock the window, saying, “You’re here early did May-“ but your words got caught in your throat when you saw he was cut up and bleeding. He pulled his mask off, his brown locks of short hair sticking up in nearly every direction.

“Peter what the hell!” You cried, gently touching around a bruise on his left cheek and then looking down at his cut up suit to see the damage. It was pretty bad, but he just gave a pained toothy smile that you glared at, already knowing what he was going to say.

“It’ll heal- I dunno about the suit- but ill heal I just need to get kisses from you and lay down for a while and I’ll be better in no time,” he said, pecking your lips then walking passed you. You were baffled as he had one hand over his side and used the other to grab a towel to put over your bed before sitting down on it. You’d honestly never seen him this hurt- you’ve seen bruises, mega painful looking bruises, and few cuts but this was just bad. His suit was cut up. What kind of people did he run into for them to do that? He noticed you staring and sighed, “I know what you’re thinking (y/n), but really I’m okay! You should’ve seen the other guys.” He joked but you crossed your arms not amused.

“Other guys? Looking at how you ended up- I can only assume you killed them,” you said in a serious tone, but he laughed like it was a joke. When he saw you weren’t laughing he let his head fall downwards for a moment.

“Can you not lecture me right now- this really hurts,” he motioned over his wounds and you sighed once more, hands falling to the side as he gave you those puppy dog eyes now. You didn’t say anything as you wandered over to your door and went to retrieve some things to clean his wounds. He may heal pretty fast, but you’ll be damned if he’s going to lay there all bloodied up and in pain. Peter watched you go and pushed himself more onto the bed, before swinging his feet up and knocking over the music box on your bed. He raised a brow, and grabbed it, realizing it was a music box when he saw the wound up in the back. He opened it after twisting it, smiling at the soft tune that began to play out like you had done. He curiously looked at its contents and he would’ve left it alone because it was clearly private if they were in a box, but his eyes caught sight of a “-rker” and when he moved the other papers he saw it was his name. Curiosity got the best of him as he pulled out the pink, folded sheet of paper and laughed softly when he saw it was his name written in your handwriting in the center of a near perfect looking heart.

He glanced at the door to see if you were coming back, and saw you still werent back so he gently opened it, seeing a full page of writing and a date at the top, Peter recognizing the year as freshman year, the year you transferred to Midtown High and the first year you met. He felt his heart warm up as he realized what this was.

It was a love letter.

Dear Peter Parker,

I know we’ve only just met, but every time I’m around you I feel butterflies in my stomach and my heart races 100 beats per minute. You’re very sweet, funny, and really smart and I couldn’t help but feel these feelings for you even if we’ve only known each other for a month or two. Everyday spent with you has been the best days of my life! I came to this school with no friends and dreaded having to have to do a partner project in biology. You were kind enough to sit by me and ask me to work with you. After that, I couldn’t stop myself from falling in love with you. I feel silly for writing a letter, but I’m not really good with words and I am not sure you feel the same. I’m currently writing on the bus ride home, hoping to god the person behind me isn’t looking over the seat. I would be so embarrassed! But- I really hope you do feel the same way, I’ll be crushed if you didn’t. Please don’t think I’m a fool for writing this letter

With love,

(y/n)

By the time Peter got to the end, the smile on his lips were so wide. He found this completely touching and adorable because it was dated about 3 months before you two even began to date towards the middle of freshman year. The fact that you already liked him so much before then also made him a bit giddy.

You had just gotten out from your parents bathroom, having been in there a while trying to find the first aid kit. When you walking back down the hall towards your bedroom you stopped when you heard Swan Lake.

“Oh...oh no-“ your heart dropped as you remember what was in that box and you ran into your room, eyes widen when you saw Peter holding the letter in his hands, “What are you doing?!” The music ended on queue and Peter snapped his head in your direction, seeing your horrified expression. You set the first aid kit onto the dresser near the door and reached to take the note away from him but he dodged your hand, “Give it! Please don’t read it! It’s from a year ago please Peter!” You begged, “I don’t even know what’s in it, it’s probably horrible!” Peter hadn’t said anything, just smiling playfully and keeping the note away from you as you leaned over him, still being aware of his injuries. Although he’d forgotten about his own injuries being distracted by your letter. He fell backwards and groaned in pain swinging his legs over the side of your bed. Your eyes widened.

“I already read it by the way,” Peter said, looking up at where you sat next to him, one leg crossed over the other, “I can’t believe you didn’t give it to me! We could’ve been dating way sooner!” You tilted your head, cheeks heating up as you snatched the letter from him and scanned over it quickly.

“Dear god no- this would’ve slowed things down! This is so- so bad,” you claimed and looked back at him with a major cringe on your face. Peter shook his head disagreeing with you, “I barely knew you- are you telling me you wouldn’t of been freaked out by this? It’s kind of stalkerish.”

“Nope!”

You shook your head in disbelief, and looked back down at the paper, embarrassed by the horrible confession of love whereas Peter was grinning like a child next to you.

“It’s cute that you’ve always had a crush on me,” he teased you, you became flushed and began to fold the sides of the paper nervously, “hey, hey why are you so embarrassed? I liked you too you know.” He admitted, pushing himself up now clenching his side lightly. You set the letter down and got the first aid kit.

“I don’t know why I’m so embarrassed,” you admitted as you took the same spot next to him, “We’re literally dating. And I feel like I can’t even look at you.”

“Well- you got what you wanted,” Peter said as he tapped on the spider logo on his, his suit loosing up and falling off his shoulders to reveal the bloody wounds. Normally when he had his shirt off you wouldn’t able to concentrate, no one should let the nerd demeanor throw them off, he was pretty built and it was nice. The wounds were your main focus, along with that embarrassing letter though, there was no time to ogle.

“Oh yeah?” You asked, a smirk on your lips as you got out the supplies, “And what was it I wanted?”

“For me to return your feelings, thus us beginning to date, you got it all!” he explained, wincing when you began to clean around his wounds, “Why did you never give me the letter? It was really sweet...” he said in a strain voice, you pursed your lips together and looked at him.

“I don’t know, I remember coming home that day and just setting it into the music box and never letting it see the light of day again.”

“There must’ve been a- ow,” he closed his eyes and bit his bottom lip and you seized cleaning one of the bigger wounds, looking at him with a sorry look, “a reason!” You licked your lip as you began to think back to that day, and it suddenly hit you. You laughed sadly.

“The next day, I ran into this girl and she was crying. And I asked her what was wrong and she said that she sent a long text to her crush about how much she liked him and he completely ignored her, and that he wouldn’t talk to her,” you explained, Peter frowned, “So as you can tell...that really discouraged me.”

“What a damn jerk,” Peter said raising a brow, “I wouldn’t of done that to you, I mean- look at us now-“

“Me cleaning up your wounds after a year of dating?” You chirped and he smiled fondly.

“Well- we could be doing more!” He teased and wiggled his eyebrows and you rolled your eyes, “Woah! I meant watching a movie together and cuddling! What were you thinking?”

“There will be no cuddling because you’re hurt,” you gestured to his wounds and he scoffed and put out his bottom lip. You continued to clean up in wounds in silence, suppressing that smile on your lips.

When he was all clean and bandaged up, you dug into your extra clothes and handed him a pair of sweatpants and then gave him one of your large sweatshirts you wore in the colder weather. You helped him get it on, pulling the sweatshirt gently over his back and stomach. He wasn’t hiding the fact that it hurt, and you pat the spot next to you.

“Thought we were going to watch a movie,” he said, crawling next to you onto your bed and settling down facing you, propping his head up with his right arm. You shook your head.

“M’ kind of tired,” you mumbled, fluffing your pillow. Peter blinked, and noticed that he was pretty tired too, Aunt May knew he was going over to your place, so sleeping over wouldn’t be the worst thing. He leaned over, catching your lips into a kiss and with a cheeky grin he said, “Thank you for taking care of me (y/n), I don’t know what I’d do without you. Everyday spent with you has been the best days of my life and I can’t wait for more!” Your eyes widen and you flicked him in the shoulder as he laughed loudly, falling into his back. You nuzzled your head into his arm, not wanting to lay on him due to his injuries.

“Everything in that letter was true by the way, Peter.” You said, closing your eyes. Peters eyes were already closed, but there was a smile on lips before both of you fell asleep.

#peter parker imagine #peter parker #spider man #peter parker x reader #peter parker x gender neutral reader #spider-man x reader #spider man imagine #my imagines #mcu imagines #leslie writes imagines again #marvel imagines #enjoyyyyyyyy

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thejokersenigma · 7 years

Text

Joker x Reader - One Shot Request - No one disrespects the Queen.

Hi guys,

Some I' really excited for this piece of writing because it's my very first request! Thank you to whoever posted this for me to do by the way - I like writing for someone!

This was the request:

Could you perhaps write a oneshot fanfiction with Joker where the reader is badly anorexic? I know it's a touchy subject it's just I personally am struggling with it and feel unlovable. Most people tell me I'm a skeleton and look disgusting. If you are willing too I'd really like to read something like that as I adore your work and reading your fanfics makes me happy. If not it's understandable... Like where J realises she never eats and sees how deathly she looks and tries to help her?

First of all, I was more than happy to write this because I myself have been through anorexia and so I really wanted to cheer this anon up in anyway I could. With that in mind I do apologise if you can't relate to this fic very well, I'm sure everyone who has anorexia goes through things differently, but ive written it the way that I went through by using what I felt and what I experienced.

Other point to make, this is not exactly like what the request asked for as it focuses more on the lack of energy etc. side of it and more of just before help, not the help techniques. If you would like a one shot more on what you asked for feel free to let me know and I'd happily write it but I got caught up in this storyline in my head and didn't want to make it 10,000 words by putting in anymore than what ive done here.

But like i'd said, I'm happy to carry it on if that's something people are interested in.

Sorry about the really long blab above ^^^ I'll get on with the story now.

MASTERLIST

One-shot MASTERLIST

WARNING: TRIGGERING! Please do not read if anything about anorexia is in anyway way triggering!!!! You have been warned! Pls don't put yourself through pain to read this! xxxxxx

You've been warned!

When I looked at my phone, the clock read nearly 4:30am.

There was a dim light in the room, the summer sun already having risen. I could feel a presence behind me as I lay in bed, and a quick glance over my shoulder confirmed my suspicions – my boyfriend was home.

He hadn’t been 2 hours earlier when - yet again - I had woken up, but now I turned over to watch him, his green hair - usual so neatly styled – dishevelled and fanning out around him on his pillow, his pallor face peaceful, and, though the rings under his eyes still dark, the features on his face were softer somehow.

He was beautiful in his own way, I thought as I admired him lying there. To some people his appearance was terrifying, others found him almost intoxicating. I was one of those. His vibrant red lips, only a short distance away, were addictive and even now I wanted to reach out and trace them. His eyes, hidden though they were in the dark under his eyes lids, were a captivating blue that could pierce into you and I had to stop myself from waking him just to see them.

I didn’t get to do this often. Just be with him. He was always busy doing something, sometimes I wondered if he acknowledged my existence at all or if I was just a convenience, available when he needed me, but otherwise not there.

When we were together I still didn’t feel like we stopped to savour anything, he was always such an urgent person, he didn’t savour many things. So I liked times like this, even is he wasn’t really part of this. I felt like I could step back and just admire him.

As I revelled in his perfectness, I couldn’t help the thoughts now turning to how much I wasn’t perfect. How I was nothing like the man before me. Personality or beauty.

So why was I here?

Why was I the one lying next to him in this huge queen-sized bed in his penthouse?

Was I just a convenience?

I was always waiting for the day he didn’t bring me back here. Or the day he just turned a gun on me. You’d think I’d be scared that this was technically a possibility, but it was weird, I had never felt in danger with him. He clearly trusted me, I thought as I watched his chest rise and fall rhythmically, or else he wouldn’t put himself in such a vulnerable position with me.

But why?

There was nothing about me particularly enticing, nothing to draw someone in – I was a plain girl, untalented, chubby, ungraceful and nothing compared to what he could have.

The minute I once more turned my thoughts down this path, I could feel the invasive thoughts taking other once again, That’s right. The voice said to me, you need to be better. They were right and I was now painfully aware of how many hours I had been lying in the bed. I had to be better.

I rolled back over, sitting up and about to swing my legs over the edge when I felt a strong, muscular arm wrap around my waist and pull me backwards.

My head landed on the Joker’s solid chest and I heard the sleepy mumble close to my ear. “Where do you think you’re going?”

“Can’t sleep.” I replied, pulling against his restraint. The voice in my head was louder now. Demanding. I needed to be on my feet now or else I was lazy. Failing.

I pulled against my restraint, almost violently, and J wasn’t expecting it so he released me. I moved back to the end of the bed, immediately pushing myself to my feet. I hugged my arms against myself, instantly freezing when I got out of the warm bed - even in the middle of July. I noticed movement behind me and I turned to see the Joker making a move to get out of bed as well.

“No J.” I told him, leaning over my side of the bed and placing my hand on his chest – immediately the invasive thoughts were back, battling with each. Was this bad? Am I using energy if I’m not supporting my full weight on my legs? But I’m using my arm muscles to keep myself up – so that’s alright – I’m just using different muscles. “You need to sleep.” I said, trying not to show the inner battle inside me.

“And so do you doll.” He retorted grumpily.

“I went to bed early.” I lied, watching him carefully, begging him in my mind to believe me. “J, I’m fine.” I insisted, “Just because I can’t sleep doesn’t me you shouldn’t.” He stared back at me, his eyes clear and penetrating even in the darkness of the room and I was worried he would see through my lie and put up a fight.

He dropped back down onto the bed without a word, turning over so he wasn’t facing me. That hurt a bit, but I was glad he was letting me go. I didn’t hang around, leaving him to get some rest as I walk out the room in silence, grabbing and jumper and then closing the door as quietly as possible behind me.

I wandered from room to room slowly as I pulled my hoody over my head – it was 2 sizes too big for me now.

I didn’t know what to do with myself.

I had all these extra hours now that I didn’t sleep as long, yet nothing to do with them.

I tried to remember what I used to do, but few things appealed to me anymore.

I remembered I used to read a lot, book after book – sometimes finishing a huge novel in a day if I got really into it. Now nothing seemed to hold my attention for long – it was too much effort to get invested in a book and pay attention to it.

I remembered once wanting to write. Now had no imagination, and no will to sit at a computer for hours at a time. Besides I couldn’t now - I would have to stand.

Instead I turned to one of the few activities that I found myself enjoying now – so much so it was what usually got me through the day – watching the cooking channel.

It sounded lame, but for some reason I loved it and found it fascinating. I made my way to the living room, switching on the TV, not surprised when it was already on the right channel (J didn’t watch much TV – he was too busy). And so I watched rerun after rerun of a cooking competition, enthralled in the concoctions and the food porn on the screen.

I didn’t sit on the expensive sofas that graced the high-end flat though, instead I stood, leaning on the back of the chair until I realised maybe I ought not to be leaning – the voice telling me that it wasn’t doing enough – and I reluctantly pushed myself up so that my leg supported my full weight, my feet already protesting.

No pain, no gain, I thought, shifting my weight from foot to foot to try to relieve the ache a bit. After a while I pulled out my phone and returned to my second favourite pastime – looking at websites for health tips, weight loss tricks and recipes.

I don’t know how long I stood there flicking through tabs and watching Jamie Oliver teach me to roast a Turkey just right (it was a Christmas special on in the middle of July) – probably at least an hour before I couldn’t ignore the pain in my feet anymore and I needed to move.

So I switched to the last thing in my repertoire of hobbies – cooking.

So the rest of the my very early morning was spent cooking up a breakfast for J and any henchman that had to stop by the flat for business.

The oven clock read 8am when I finally allowed myself to have my first meal of the day. (I was ready to eat at 7:56, but it had to be exactly 8 before I allowed myself anything – otherwise the voice told me I’d get too hungry too quickly). I prepped my food – an apple – cut into the thinnest slices I could manage so I felt like I was eating more – and weighed it – 50g = 26 calories. I typed this into my calorie counting app on my phone then proceeded to remove 10g from the scales and threw them into the bin - just to be safe that I wasn’t definitely eating no more than 26 calories.

When I had remeasured the food at least 2 more times to check it was definitely the number I had read I finally allowed myself to sit down on one of the kitchen stools and eat.

I ate away at the thin pieces of fruit, trying my best to eat slowly and make the most of the food, cursing to myself that I couldn’t have waited until later to eat. The problem with getting up early was I had to acknowledge the hunger earlier - if I managed to sleep later, I could eat later. That then meant that got hungry later and might even be able to skip lunch.

I suddenly felt a shiver wrack through my body even with my oversized jumper and thick pyjamas, and I yearned for a hot drink to warm me up a bit. I could smell the coffee beans that J had from the other side of the room. Even as I considered the temptation of making a cup I was doing the calculations in my head. I couldn’t afford the calories – all 2-9 of them (depending on who you asked) I always counted each cup as 18 calories because that was the highest result I had gotten when I had searched it and I couldn’t risk being wrong.

So instead I stood back up, my feet immediately sore again, and boiled the kettle, pouring myself a mug of hot water. This would do I thought as I sipped at the hot water. It felt wonderful.

My breakfast finished, and still no movement from J, I thought about what to do now. Today was my day off my usual work out – but that didn’t mean it was my day off exercise. I didn’t want to wake J up, but I needed to get out of my pyjamas so I dug around till I found the pile of laundry, clean but not ironed.

I changed in a bathroom down the hall, pulling a fleece over my goosebump riddled arms. I couldn’t believe it was July. Must be global warming or something.

I took the private elevator down to the ground floor and then headed across the large entrance way to the exit. I got a few weird looks on the way out of the building but most of the people around at this time of morning on a Tuesday were business men rushing to meetings and I was too self-conscious to keep much of my gaze higher than the floor immediately in front of me.

I said I would go for a walk. Told myself I would. But I knew I was really going for a run. The good thing about running was – besides the obvious calorie burning – I could run past people before I caught them staring at me.

I started running the minute I stepped onto the pavement. I ran and ran until I couldn’t anymore. Then I would slow to a walk for a few moments before I ran again. I continued this the whole run. I couldn’t run any less than the last time – it always had to be the exact same or more. If it was more – then I would have to meet that next time.

I ran for a good hour. 1:13 to be exact. I did a circuit so I ended up back at the suite.

It was only when I walked back into the pent house, still catching my breath, that I realised the door to the bedroom was open and, when I looked in, the bed was empty. J must have finally got up and probably now working – I wondered if he found the food I’d made him.

I moved to the bathroom, turning on the shower and undressing, having to pause for a moment when I felt a wave of light-headedness wash over me. I sat on the side of the large bath tub, soon letting myself slip off and sink to the tiled floor, my knees folded into my chest and my head in my hands as I tried to breathe evenly, momentarily terrified something bad was happening to me.

I kept breathing myself through it – maybe I’d been overdoing it recently? After a few moments, everything felt fine once more and I pushed myself wearily to my feet – the voice in my head only justifying that I could sit that long thanks to the run I had just done.

Standing upright made me feel woozy again but I persevered anyway, slipping into the shower and moving slowly until I felt a bit better – though it was probably the speed I always moved. Everything I did was now was slow. But everyone had days like that right? When you didn’t have the energy or motivation to move any faster than one slow pace. That was just life – I just happen to do it a lot lately – but was it really slow after all – was I just being silly?

As I stood pondering this I felt cold arms wrap my stomach. I flinched at the contact on an area I felt sensitive about, gasping in surprise, at jumping at the cold touch. “Jeez, doll, this water is boiling.” I spun around to come face to face with the Joker still fully clothed, behind me.

“What are you doing?” I asked in disbelief looking at his shirt which hung open as though he had been in the middle of getting dressed, the water now soaking into the sleeves.

“Trying to see if my little kitten wanted to get hot in a different way then pouring lava on her skin.” He growled teasingly with a wide grin on his face, his hands trailing over my skin and making me goose bump in a non-sexual way. I couldn’t help but shiver against him.

“Ooo doll, do that again.” The Joker purred, pulling me closer so I was pressed against his muscular chest, his cold skin against mine seeming to pull the heat from my body.

“No, J.” I said almost harshly, pushing away from him and stepping back under the powerful shower, hugging my arms to myself and embracing the heat that washed over me.

“Excuse me, doll?” Asked J incredulously, his grin dropping and his eyes becoming dark – like they did when anyone refused him something. But I trusted him to control himself around me.

“I’m sorry J,” I apologised none the less - I didn’t like disappointing him. “I’m just not in the mood.”

He grumbled something indistinctly, his eyes still dangerous, and left in a huff. I was left standing alone in the shower, even colder than before.

We didn’t really clash for the rest of the day – mostly, I believed, because J did his usual of shutting himself away in the office all day as he carried out his business.

Our relative peace only lasted till that evening however, when J asked invited me to go with him to the club for the evening.

“No thanks, J.” I said, giving my familiar answer as I lounged on the sofa (my first sit down in over 2 hours).

He frowned, his eyes darkening immediately again, not that I noticed – I wasn’t looking at him. He didn’t say anything in reply but he didn’t move either. I had expected him to get his answer and leave – maybe in a huff, but I didn’t have the energy to care. When he didn’t however I turned my head to look at him, frowning at him in question.

“It wasn’t a request this time, doll.” He growled at me in warning.

I was shocked by what he was saying, was he forcing me to go out? “I don’t want to go, J.” I told him calmly, but with a sternness to it.

“I don’t care what you want, doll.” He purred dangerously.

“You can’t force me to go out with you.” I told him, but my voice faltered slightly under his gaze and I knew I could feeling my pulse under my skin. He was starting to scare me.

“Kitten,” He warned, “you’re pushing me and I’m not sure you want to.” There was no smile on his face, his lips a dark red and pressed into a thin line, his eyes looked fierce.

I was frightened now, J hadn’t been like this with me before. Had I pissed him off? I was always worried because of my low mood that I was being moody or annoying to people, but I couldn’t never seem to do anything about.

Now I was stuck in my own mind. I hated that I was letting J down by not wanting to go with him, but I was tired – physically and mentally exhausted. The voice seemed confused too. If I went to the club then I the movement was burning more calories than staying here. But I hated the feeling of exhaustion I got when I was out in public and the fact I would have to make it through the whole night trying to look alive, whilst also coming up with a new reason why I couldn’t have one of the club’s cocktails. J had already asked me several times if I was pregnant. I wasn’t willing to say yes to that to get out of a drink – not yet anyway.

But I hadn’t been to the club in over a month now. J went nearly every night to one or another of his businesses.

I didn’t know what to say to J now. He was still frightening me and I was scared to push him further and unsure what I could say to placate him. All that was running through my head at the moment was the same lame excuses as to why I didn’t want to go – I’m too tired, I don’t even drink, you don’t need me there, it’s not like I’ll do anything but sit and wait for you to finish anyway. I knew J didn’t care about my excuses.

I couldn't meet his eyes anymore, keeping my gaze down. He couldn't stop glaring darkly at me and - if I looked at him now - I was sure I would see the anger darkening his eyes to a stormy blue.

When the silence between us became too much, and I had to look up at him just to try to gage what he was feeling, it was worse than I thought. I was worried what I was seeing was not truly anger, but hurt, as though he was in some sort of pain.

That sight burned me, broke me, and I had to look away, concentrating back onto the thick carpet under my socks, tracing the pattern with my eyes.

“I’m sorry, J” I mumbled at the floor.

“You’re sorry?” He whined, mimicking me cruelly. “You’re sorry?" he asked again. “Your apologies are like cheesy pop songs doll, they just keep playing till people are sick of them!” He sneered.

I didn't know what to say to that - clearly an apology wouldn't be right - so I continued to stare at the floor. It was comfier like this. I liked the fact my neck hung loose, no energy needed to hold it up. I liked the fact I was collapsed on the sofa, all day I wished I could have done it.

“Look at you.” he snarled venomously, gesturing to me as I sat - probably looking like a rejected puppet collapsed against the arm of the sofa and lost amongst the many layers of baggy jumpers and hoodies I wore, "pathetic."

"You’re weak.” He spat, “No spark, no flare, no energy. What is the use of you anymore?" he demanded.

I shook my head at the carpet, each word stabbing and shooting through me like he was firing the weapons I knew were in his pockets. What was the point in me? What was my use anymore? I could feel the tears forming in my eyes and I tried to hold back the tide that now threatened to overwhelm me, covering my face with my hands as if somehow that might help to hold it all back.

“Pathetic.” He snarled again before he spun around and stormed out of the room, leaving me curled into the sofa, no longer able to hold back the emotions. I let out one hiccupping sob and then everything poured out until I was blubbering into the expensive sofa arm.

It wasn’t long before I heard the roar of an engine and the screech of wheel that told me the Joker had left and a new, more intense wave washed over until I was gripping fists of my hair and pulling in misery and frustration.

In a moment of mental clarity, I had a thought.

What was happening to me?

I went to bed early that night, unable to concentrate on anything but on low I was feeling. How nothing was right. How I was starving and wanted food. How I was in pain and hated my workouts, dreaded them every day. How I hated that I hurt people around me – especially J. I didn’t blame him for going off on me, everything he said had been true. I was weak, I was pathetic.

With all these things replaying in my head I slept fitfully that night – never seeming to manage for than 30 minutes before I was awoken by my own mind.

That was why - when the Joker finally returned to the suite at 4am the following morning - I was lying awake. Hungry, thirsty, depressed and stressed, yet too exhausted to anything about any of these things, I just lay staring up at the ceiling in the dark.

When I heard the front door open I knew it would have to be him – security was tight around here, very tight. Not even a henchman was allowed up here if he wasn’t here. None the less I panicked and my every sense focused on his movements through the pent house as I tried to detect when he was getting close to the room.

After a few long agonising minutes, the hallway light was switched on illuminating the outline of the door directly in front of me. I heard the door open and one crack of light enlarged as the bedroom door opened to reveal J’s dark shadow in the doorway. I blinked at the sudden brightness that filled the room.

The silence between us stretched on. I didn’t move and neither did J.

I could have pretended to sleep. Delayed the conversation, maybe even removed the chance to have it.

But I was tired, achy, depressed and starving.

“Help me.” I whimpered into the dark.

I thought the shadow would leave me then. Turn and walk away from the pitiful girl lying on the bed, unable to find anything within her to even sit up. All I do was wait for the shadow to leave the doorway and for the sound of receding footsteps.

But they didn’t.

The shadow moved, but not away. It came into the room, his steps softened by the thick carpet underfoot. I closed my eyes, no longer sure I wanted to do this now.

The next thing I knew I was being scooped up by strong arms and pulling me upright with very little effort until I was cradled in his arms. His chest was hard and cold, but I found it comforting and solid.

“I thought you would have left.” He murmured so quietly I almost couldn’t hear.

I shook my head – hard as it was to do when I was pressed so tightly to his chest.

“The one time, kitten, that the I’m glad you’re not like you use to be.” He said, and I pulled my head up to look him in the eyes, frowning with confusion.

“The old you would never had let me get away with the shit I said to you, doll. You would have up and left whilst preaching about some right you had or something.” He chuckled quietly to himself. I just cuddled back into his solid chest, showing him in my own silent way that I had no intention to leave. His arms tightened around me even more.

We stayed like that in silence for a while, happy to be in each-others company. It was what I had always wanted between us – for him to slow down for a moment, and I guess I needed to as well. It was a rare kind of sincerity with the Joker.

“I just want to be perfect for you J.” I finally admitted, lifting my head slightly so I could speak.

He didn’t say anything and I wondered if he heard me. I buried once more, embarrassed for confessing something so personal when he didn’t even care to listen.

“You think I would waste my time on someone who wasn’t already perfect?” He asked, and I felt the vibration of his voice through his chest, it comforted me.

I pulled myself away from him again so I could look up at his face, “But your always around all those pretty girls at the club – I’m nothing like them.” I pointed out.

“You don’t think I know that, doll?” He demanded with a frown and I let my head drop – he was annoyed that I wasn’t like them then. “I’m glad you’re not, doll. I’ve been around those sorts of girls for a very long time and none of them have ever come home with me.” He told me, “The first night I saw you I made sure you did.” There was a another pause of silence, both of us lost in our own minds. “That was a long time ago though.” J reminisced, “A time when you looked very different.”

“But why - ?” I pressed, confused by what he was saying – it didn’t make sense to me.

“Because doll, I chose you for more than you’re looks – which I hasten to add are more than adequate!” He said hotly, as though annoyed at my continual denial of this, “And I’ll be sure to correct you when you say otherwise.” He added. “But doll, the first thing I saw with you wasn’t your killer dress or your murderous curves,” He purred teasingly, running his hands up my body as he still held me upright and I squirmed under his touch, uncharacteristically trying to hold back giggles, “it was your personality, your humour, your energy. All of which you are now severely lacking in, kitten.” He pointed out.

At least words any happiness I had built being with him crumbled. “I’m a failure.” I blubbered, feeling myself close to sobbing again.

“You’re not a failure doll,” J said, almost softly, though there was firmness to his voice, “I’m afraid you’re just sane.” He said solemnly, “It’s a terrible disease that grips you – it makes you care too much, it makes you gullible, it makes you greedy for something better and never content to revel in the present.” He rattled off passionately. He switched his arm placement around me so he supported me with only one arm, the other he brought up to my face and tenderly wiped away the tears on my cheeks, “It’s a terrible disease,” He repeated, “It always makes you look for the reason to cry, not to laugh.” He added with a sad smile that I could just make out in the poor lighting.

I gave him a weak smile in return, probably looking a state even in the darkness, and my smile dropped again at the thought. J must have noticed because he moved his hand from my cheek to my chin, tilting my face up so I looked at him in the eye. “That why I’m here though, doll.” He said with a small smile, “I’m the opposite of you, you’re my sanity doll, and I’m your crazy.” He purred lowly, tilting my face more and pulling me up as he leant down and he kissed me.

“I’ll help you.” He promised, “No one disrespects my Queen, especially not the Queen herself.”

tags: @carouselcurls

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gontagokuhara · 7 years

Note

a lil birdie told me u like talking bout ur trip pls I wanna hear what France n Spain r like :ooo (I love ur writing btw :>)

HI!!!!!

so. like ive said, i went to france and spain a few months back and it was an Amazing Time. theres so much to talk about and i dont want to flood dashboards so ill put this under a read more :0

france:

-our group spent 2 hours in customs in charles de gaulle airport. it was hot, the middle of the night my regular time, about 9 am france time, and by the time we got out of customs it was nearly 11:30-that was like…..the only low point? th organization we travelled through groups up smaller groups into large groups (like 40-50 people?) and we were waiting on the other groups from ohio, oregon, and new jersey (remember those groups, they become important later) for another like 3ish hours? -the airport was rly interesting though! it was all of the kids in our groups first exposure to an environment that wasnt all in english, so it gave us time to practice our french listening to announcements/buying stuff/etc! there was also. a lot of green berets with assault rifles all over the place (and they were really all over france. im not sure what theyre about but theyre Everywhere)-around 2-3 we get on a bus with the new jersey + ohio groups and go to notre dame cathedral! the first thing we noticed leaving the airport was that it is hot as balls in france. its humid and the sun is oppressive as hell but the Big Plus was that there are. literally 0 bugs. i didnt see a single bug my whole trip it was fucking amazing-our first day was pretty lowkey; we basically just went to notre dame, broke for lunch, and then hung out in that general area until dinner!-our second day in france was Very Jam Packed with shit and was simultaneously my favorite and least favorite day? our plan was to ascend the eiffel tower in the morning and visit versailles in the afternoon, but the eiffel tower was closed bc of a security issue so we flipped our schedule!-we toured all around versailles palace and while it was very interesting and beautiful i lowkey had an anxiety attack bc people kept holding onto me and grabbing me and it was very hot and overwhelming. things really looked up when we looked around the gardens!-after that + lunch we went back to the eiffel tower and got to go up at night!!! which was beautiful. also, it doesnt get dark in france Or spain until like 10 pm? its very odd but really really cool! and it makes you feel less tired. our curfew was a little earlier than we thought so we couldnt make the line to go to the very top, but we went to the middle section and i have some Iconique selfies up there. when we went down again we bought some stuff at the little gift shops and i got the best slushie ive ever had and it was super fun:0-third day was a pretty long bus tour and then the louvre! the bus tour yielded like 300 pictures and the only thing me nd my mom rly cared about was seeing the mona lisa, so we hung out the rest of the time in shops and stuff!-fourth day we took a bullet train from paris to avignon and honestly the most iconic bit of that day was running around the train stop stores and buying all the french candy we could find. after that we went to pont du gard and toured the area around there, which was really beautiful! also? the toilets in pont du gard? Do Not Have Toilet Paper. dont even have paper towels. not even because theyre out, but like. theres no toilet paper holders or anything. -after that (same day!) was provence! we toured an old structure the first part of provence, and then shopped the rest! unfortunately i got really sick at the end of that day (but not before i bought Ten Bars Of Soap)-the fifth day i was nearly fuckin dead with sickness lol so i stayed behind in the hotel ;( i got to reconnect with friends on the shitty wifi that day though! (blows smooches at the jump discord)-sixth day we had like. a 5 hour bus ride from th south of france to barcelona. i listened to a Lot Of Muic.

spain:

-we didnt have time for really anything by the time we got to barcelona, but that was okay because i think we all really needed the day to recharge!-first full day in barcelona we toured the area around la sagrada familia ! we didnt get to get that close but i have really beautiful pictures! we also went to the picasso museum that day which was…..really boring. me and my friends were dying in there. we got separated from the ohio group (aka the cool group) and we got stuck with the new jersey group which succed but whateevr! after that we hung around in the city for a while before going back-the second day in barcelona was probably my favorite of the whole trip, which is kind of weird to say because i loved paris so much? but i think my kinda sour experience at versailles ust barely edges out that day as my favorite, so! we toured park guell (which is GOREGOUS) and it was great because the heat wasnt that bad And our tour leader got to see his wife!!! me and my mom got fuckin lost lol and we had to navigate through with shitty spanish to find our group. after that we went to this giant mall (seriously, its like 5 stories) that used to be a giant arena but they converted! most of the group went to a flamenco show, but me, my friend kiya, my french teacher and his daughter passed so we could explore the mall. me nd kiya fucked off and i showed her around lush for like a half hour, she bought a bunch of comics in spanish and we bought a whole lot of other shit!!! it was super super fun and it was probably my favorite day-our last full day we went to the beach! and christ this post is long enough already but someone remind me to tell the wild fucking story that is the beach in barcelona girls in relation to the oregon girls, lack of card checking, and the yelling match between a blanket salesman and an ohio chaperone. it’s fucking nuts.-and then we flew home at like 2 am! theres a whole other layer to the light home that i wont go into detail on here becasue God This Is So Long, but if any1 is interested on some of the more minor details of the trip please shoot me an ask i love talking abt my trip:0

#ask #i #this got so long im sorry? but tbh this is just bare bones our itinerary. theres so much missing #but i will actually make tumblr poop itself if i try to cram it all into one post #blease if u are interested in the little details of the trip please lmk I Want An Excuse To Talk About It #also answering this ask made me rly happy. thank u anon

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revol-lover · 7 years

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Ok I need to rant. Majorly.

Maybe I’m crazy. If I am, please let me know. I am turning 24 this month. But ok I got married a little over a year ago. Prior to this I lived at home with my parents, I wasnt allowed to stay out late, they would wait up for me to come home. Wasnt allowed to go on any over night trip with my fiancé. The whole 9 yards of extreme portuguese parent control.

I am now married and live literally a 2 minute drive away from my parents (because this is a really nice area and I like it not because I needed to be that close to them for any particular reason) and every weekend since I got married I faithfully visit them on Sundays and a few times had them over at my place instead for sunday lunch. (Not worth mentioning but I’ll mention anyway - we’re never actually “invited” over. We’re very rarely offered a meal when going over. Doesn't matter but just a detail.) This includes during my entire pregnancy, from the extreme tired and fatigue and nausea of the first trimester right up until two weeks ago seeing that I’m now in my third trimester and tired and feeling like you know I’d rather spend my weekend relaxing in between all the other things I have to do before baby gets here. its been hella BUSY.

In between visits with my parents they never call or text me. Never check on me pregnancy wise, etc. There are times even when I text my mom and she never answers me (and she is NOT phone illiterate. Also I can see when she reads texts). If I check in with them I get the “ok” responce to “how are you”. I gave up with that. I’m tired of the effort only being on me.

So like I said, its been two weeks since I’ve visited. I didnt give an explanation the first week. No one checked in on me. I mean for fucks sake I couldve been in the hospital or something but they literally never get in touch with me. Then last weekend we had friends of my husbands from out of town (something that had been pre-planned for months) here to visit so we spent a day with them and I was on my feet all day, not to mention socially drained and I needed to relax the other day (theres only 2days in a weekend!) prior to that weekend I texted my mom to see how she was and tell her I probably wouldn't be by because of those plans but said I’d come by THIS weekend (aka tomorrow).

Now its friday and honestly. I don't want to go. Again. No one checks in if I don't. And if I’m silent for weeks, they return it with silence. They don't ever check in on me. I mean is it normal for parents to not care to this degree? Especially when I had zero freedom prior to moving out. They were never emotionally close or supportive to me but there was always that control factor but now I’m moved out, Ive shown and proved plenty that I care about having a relationship with them and they don't return it in their actions at all.

Now maybe if I had NO other priorities besides making that ONE weekly visit, I’d care less and be able to make it work. But that just isn't the case. Kevin has a 90 year old grandmother who we are both very close to and visit once a week during the week, almost every week. Someone who actually does notice our absence. Someone who appreciates our visit. Then, Kevin’s dad is currently in the hospital recovering from a double organ transplant. He has been in various hospitals and medical centers since November. We also visit him (and Kevins mom who is at the hospital with him most of the time) once a week. There was a time during this period that we didnt even know that he would survive. He was on a transplant list for nearly 2 years. He was extremely close to death, if he didnt get those organs when he did he would not be alive right now. Before he got so sick, we also , were visiting Kevins parents every weekend at their house. They always asked us if we were coming by, always made a meal for us all to share. Kevin’s mom, who has been going through literally the craziest, busiest time of her life, going to work and going to the hospital, every single day for the past 6+ months, one of the hospital stays being 1 1/2 hours away from home and she went faithfully every day, THIS WOMAN, has texted my husband every day to see how we are doing, and specifically always asks how I am doing, how my appointments are going, how I’m feeling. Its a tiny consideration that goes such a long way. Something you kind of expect from a mom???? But my own parents don't do.

So its like. Am i crazy to be sick and tired of visiting every weekend ? To go to their house to sit in a room with one of them staring at the tv and the other their cell phone. Occasionally having a conversation with us, but otherwise it being quiet and slightly uncomfortable and god forbid me, feeling like a bit of a waste of time. Especially when they never check in on me/us. They never invite us over. They never ask to come over. But in contrast to that my mom is so overbearing about the baby stuff. She is handling my baby shower and knows that I don't like overly frilly pink things and she's making sure that it is exactly all about that, because thats what SHE likes. And buying the baby a thousand pairs of shoes even though I already told her I won't be putting shoes on her until she can walk. I mean. If you've been following me you know my mom has her own book of issues and our relationship is very complicated, bt she has a shopping addiction and is very materialistic and thats just not me. I don't live my life that way. We really clash there and I don't want my daughter to have to deal with what I dealt with with my mom, which is conditional love.

Ive totally gone off track here. I hate even writing these things and publishing them because I’m sure theres that one person who has one thing to say at least about oh at least you have parents or something which, yes I get that. But any other relationship in life this lack of effort would not be acceptable at all. I don't chase people who don't ever show that they care to keep in touch. I feel like my parents take for granted how dedicated I have been to keeping in touch. Have I even mentioned that I through a mothers day brunch for my mom mother in law sister in law and grandmother in law that my mom knew about for weeks and chose to come late to even though she's never late to anything and knows people being late drives me a little nuts (like her. she hates it too so I don't get why she did that to me. It wasnt even an accident. my dad went to church. she was home. he was gonna be late. she couldve came and he couldve come late. she chose to wait for him. i live 2 minutes away.. she couldve just came). I had spent the whole morning, in my third trimester of pregnancy mind you, on my feet with my husband cooking a really nice big brunch for everyone and she came late. Made my other guests feel awkward eating the food HOT as intended because she hadn't shown yet. She didnt even deserve me caring enough to do that. This woman has emotionally abused me my entire life, and physically to a degree when I was a child. But still I have this stupid good daughter complex that I feel guilt whenever I don't show appreciation even tho I’ve never been appreciate.

wow I’m sorry. I just needed to get this all out.

I’m having a baby in less then 2 months. She is going to be my #1 priority in life. I don't think people realize the shit I do. The shit I’ve been doing. It isn't going to continue. I need to be present for my child. I need to be what I didnt have. I need to give her the love and time and nurturing she needs. I need to be the least broken version of myself for her. I’m starting to feel less guilty about not putting effort toward my relationship with my parents. I don't have it in me. I can't do it all. They might not understand putting forth and expressing healthy effort to their children, but I know how important it is. My daughter will have that. Even if it comes at the expense of them barely seeing me. Its their choice in the end. They could pick up the phone too. I’m sick of being the only one.

#personal

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talledschick · 7 years

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Health and Surgery Info Update

Everyday has been such a battle, I havnt been sleeping right and have been on a messed up reversed schedule for two months now because I cannot wear my CPAP which was helping for a few weeks to get me some real restoritive sleep, but it is a struggle to wear even the lightest mask because just the extra weight in front of my head with my severe craniocervical instability makes my head slide and triggers neck spaisms setting off a chain of much worse symptoms. So I had to give up the CPAP and now I'm not "sleeping" and when I am "asleep" it's not restful and it's during the daytime. Therefore throwing my whole life out of whack. Not to mention I've had to chop off most of my hair cause it's too heavy for my unstable skull and cannot tolerate my hats anymore. I feel like a energy vampire drains me every night and leaves me completly non functional during daytime hours. This is made even worse since I need to be planning and getting done what I need too for my upcoming surguires on the east coast next month. My brain and body feel like they are at the highest degree of completly not functioning and it all comes down to this darn skull instabilty. I need to make this surgery happen and unfortuanly this means I need to ask for your help again. And it's actually two surguries again, but this time we know ahead of time. The first surgery will be a tethered cord revision on April 12th, since I have rethethered. The revision should help with many symptoms, my mobility being one and another big one would be allowing me to wear my neck collar for support and protection of my CCI. As well as a whole host of other neurological symptoms that should resolve. It was like a this miracle last time. Almost immediately resolved so many issues. Then on May 11th I'll have my craniocervical fusion. The day before I will go in for surgical traction and then the next day hard fuse it. I currently cannot wear the collar to support my unstable skull cause it's triggering a worsening and intolerable degree of my tethered cord symptoms, but not wearing a collar makes my cci worse. It's a twisted tangled web of instability I live with. Once I'm fused there will be no more brain stem comprehsion and I should be more functional than I am now, which is not functional at all. It appears as those my bone graft failed in this area in 2015 and that is why I need to go in and hard fuse it this time. Really make it stick and stay stable and keep my brain stem safe from further compression. These two operations are in Oceanside, NY and mom and I are desperately trying to figure out how to make this trip possible and where we can stay for April & May out there that has a kitchen, no stairs and 2 beds within 30min of the hosptiol/ drs office. I've made calls and checked the web and air bnb and have even called some relators trying to find a place to meet my post surgical needs and it is really difficult and rather expensive. So much more than I thought, the one place ive found for lodging alone is nearly $15,000 for the whole stay and that is well beyond anything I have and a good half an hour away. Even the cheaper options are $8,000- $10,000 and that's without a second bed and much further away from the hosptiol than is comfortable for me to travel after having spinal operations. And the further we are the higher the travel expense too. I'm trying really hard to figure something out but with all my neurological and physical issues trying to do this myself is not working out so well. And time is passing quickly. Anyone who has advice or maybe knows of something in the area please let me know. But it is very hard for me to ask for this financial help again after so many of you helped me with my surgeries last time. I hate to do this but I need your help. Without you I wont be able to afford to get out east and stay out there to have these much needed operations. I will be posting my fundraiser soon it's taken eveything I have to write this. If your able to help that would be incredable. If you can just pass on my link when its up then that would be amazing too. Thank you for reading my update and for all your support. I never could have made it this far without all of you amazing folks who helped donate last time and I am hoping that maybe some of you would be so generous and willing to help me out once again. I will forever be indebted to all of you for your help and support. These are difficult times but I am determined to get the dangerous areas of my spine stabilized and get back on my feet and build a strong and more stable life. I could almost taste it, I felt it happening before this most unfortunate turn of events, i was getting stronger and I know things will be better once this is taken care of. CCI is dangerous and I cannot keep waiting and letting it get worse. I need to have these operations now so I still have a life ahead of me, I'm only 24. I've spent more than 3 years just stuck in bed. That's not much of a life. I want outta this bedridden life. EDS is always gonna be an issue for me but with these surguries I can take some control back from my loose craniocervical ligaments and stabilize what is most needed and most importantly save my brain and Spine from further dammage. Thank you again for reading. I'll try to do better about updates going forward. Both here my blog and my Facebook page I really dropped the ball this year and one of my goals is to document everything better this time around if possible.

#journal #rant #post #surgery #eds #ehlers danlos syndrome #sleep apnea #spinal surgery #update

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seanmeverett · 7 years

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The 25x ROI Potential of Email Newsletters

The massive shift competitors are already using beat you

I. We’ve Changed to an Email-First World

Email is the oldest social network on the internet. A private, one-on-one message between colleagues, friends, and even strangers. It was texting, before texting.

The total number of worldwide email users is 3.7 billion people as of 2017 [Radicati Group]. The human population is 7.5 billion, which represents half of our entire species. No other technology aside from electricity has that level of penetration.

Radicati Group

Employees spend 13 working hours every week in their email inbox [McKinsey & Company]. That’s a quarter of your time spent doing nothing but reading and writing email. That’s not a lot of tangible work getting done.

270 billion emails get sent every day. That’s 36 emails sent, per day, for every man, woman, and child on the planet. No wonder we spend so much time on this.

Radacati Group

But over the years, email has transformed into something different than how it began. What used to be trusted communication between individuals has changed into a lot of noise.

Spammers got ahold of it. Companies looking to reach new customers got ahold of it. Businesses got ahold of it. And now, we send friend’s phone inboxes have red badges with 50,000 unread emails sitting right smack in the middle of their home screen.

II. The Winners & Losers

You can’t get around the fact that we are all inundated by emails. That’s a problem. But we also need it to communicate with other people. So we’re in a bit of a bind.

Over the last decade, Facebook grew to massive proportions, Twitter helped enable not just the 24-hour news cycle, but also 60-second news cycle. And here we are, bombarded constantly by commercials, digital ads, and a seeming never-ending push towards more noise.

To put this into perspective, 90% of email gets delivered to the intended recipient’s inbox, whereas only 2% of your Facebook fans see your posts in their News Feed [Forrester Research]. So it’s no wonder marketers have used email as a sales tactic.

So it’s also no surprise that median email open rates are only about 20%, regardless of industry:

Smart Insights email stats

We are simultaneously getting more email than ever, but paying attention to them less and less. Trust and interest is the only thing that matters in email land.

What are we to do?

III. The Promise of Email Newsletters

There is a way to reach these billions of people consistently without spending years to do it.

It’s one of the reasons email newsletters are having a renaissance. It’s an authentic voice in a private one-on-one conversation that just so happens to go out to millions of other people as well.

Organizations like The Skimm, the New York Times, The Information, Hustle are all doing it. And it seems every marketing strategy now includes an email newsletter program. Whether daily, weekly or otherwise across a wide variety of topics.

The reason? Email isn’t your Facebook news feed. It’s your life news feed. Work, friends, family, to dos, social media mentions, etc., etc., etc.

Only 10% of people have said they want to get updates from a company through Facebook, while 90% prefer email newsletters [Nielsen Norman Group].

Sorry, Facebook. Email FTW.

And therein lies another problem for marketers. It takes a long time to build a large list of people who are interested in your content. And it means it takes you away from your day to day business of selling your core product or service.

IV. Secret Tactics To Solving This Problem

Here’s a fun stat. 68% of Americans say they base their decision to open an email on the ‘From’ name [Campaign Monitor]. So if it says Company XYZ instead of Passion/Person I Care About XYZ, people are just going to swipe-to-delete.

Which means you need to insert your brand, your product, your service, your organizational Call To Action into a place where people are already spending their time, and placing their trust.

An email newsletter serves this purpose. But there are a few other important considerations to think about when deciding your email newsletter strategy:

Real humans, not fake. Your email newsletter needs to reach as many real people as possible and not fake email accounts.

Group of passionate people. You need a community around that newsletter where people can contribute and share their own thoughts so they have a sense of ownership in it.

Live on, after it’s gone. You need a place for each of these newsletters to live on the web instead of just getting deleted from a person’s private inbox. This helps with SEO and attracting new people to your brand.

Distribute via other channels. You can repurpose newsletter content for social channels, blogs, snippets, and yes even videos and podcasts. It’s an asset. Get the full value of it.

Cost. Sending emails gets expensive. Mailchimp charges over $4,000 per month to send 1 million emails. That doesn’t even count the production time or creative content you must include. That’s nearly $50,000 per year. It’s someone’s salary. Wouldn’t it be better to spend that same money on a sponsorship and not have to worry about creation or cost?

Mailchimp monthly newsletter cost is as much as someone’s salary.

V. How Newsletters Have Worked for Brands

We know that 83% of B2B marketers use email newsletters for content marketing [Content Marketing Institute]. Let’s work through the math and show how powerful the ROI can be for sponsored Email Newsletter campaigns.

Say you spend $5,000 per month on an email newsletter sponsorship to take the place of doing it yourself. And say you have a $25 per month product you’re hoping people sign up for.

That means you need $5,000 / $25 = 200 people to sign up to break even on the cost. If a newsletter goes out to 250,000 people, that means you’re looking at 200 people sign up / 250,000 people reached = 0.0008 conversion rate.

That’s tiny.

You might be wondering what an average conversion rate for all online media buying is. The median is around 2%, per WordStream.

WordStream

If you got 2% conversion from 250,000 people, that means you’re getting 5,000 people to sign up for your product. At $25 per month * 5,000 people, you’re looking at $125,000 in new revenue.

Subtracting the $5,000 cost and you just made yourself $120,000 in revenue while doing almost no work.

Obviously results will vary across newsletters, audiences, products, and services, but at a 25x ROI potential, it’s not something you can afford to ignore if you care about the success of your organization.

VI. Your Next Steps

At this point you know what you have to do. There’s not much of a choice. Let’s review the bidding:

You know you need to reach customers through email because it’s the biggest audience on the planet.

You know you need to do it through an interest-based Email Newsletter because they get more people to sign up and read them, even compared to social media.

You need to sponsor someone’s else’s newsletter because they already have the audience (you don’t have to spend years building it yourself) and you don’t have to worry about content creation (they do that), nor the cost (they pay for the technology and distribution).

Thus, it’s faster, cheaper, and easier to partner with someone else than it is for you to do it yourself.

Did you know you can sponsor The Mission’s Newsletter?

The Mission has an email newsletter that goes out to over 223,000 subscribers. That’s thousands of real people (like you!) who are ravenously engaged in our content, and have been for years.

We only work with brands whose products we use, love and trust.

Our email newsletters live on our site forever, where we consistently rank on the 1st page of Google for a massive number of topics, interests, and keywords. We also provide you with the content that you can repurpose for your own website, blog, and social channels.

Finally, we are cheaper than you doing it yourself.

If you’re interested in harnessing the power of Email Newsletters for your own organization, get in touch with our team at The Mission.

The Mission

— Sean Everett

If you enjoyed this story, please click the 👏 button and share to help others find it! Feel free to leave a comment below.

The Mission publishes stories, videos, and podcasts that make smart people smarter. You can subscribe to get them here.

The 25x ROI Potential of Email Newsletters was originally published in The Mission on Medium, where people are continuing the conversation by highlighting and responding to this story.

from Stories by Sean Everett on Medium http://ift.tt/2xaaN0u

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