#someone has to exercise this doggo

[akitalockwood]

Back to my GOW brainrot

Commissions

#god of war ragnorak #god of war #gow kratos #fenrir #artist on tumblr #from Dad of BOY to Dad of Dog #look man #someone has to exercise this doggo #Aki's blorbos #Aki can art

[lovemesomesurveys]

Are you a fan of My Chemical Romance? What's your favorite song from them?: I like Helena, I’m Not Okay, Ghost of You, Welcome to the Black Parade.

When was the last time you had your ears cleaned?: Recently.

What's your morning routine?: Well, my new morning routine since being in the hospital starts around 5 or 6 when they take care of stuff and then at 7 the morning shift comes in and my new nurse does her thing (temperature, blood pressure check, listens to my heart and lungs) and then administers my vitamins and medications and checks things out. After that, I just watch the news and go on my phone. Exciting stuff.

Does the future scare you? : Very much so.

Do you think anyone dislikes you for no reason?: They likely have a reason.

Where did you last adventure to?: My little beach trip back in March.

Have you ever read a book in an entire day? : Yeah, many times.

What always makes you feel better when you are upset?: Sometimes a good cry or sleep helps a little.

Have you ever been to a horse race?: No.

How did you get your most noticeable scar?: Surgical procedure.

When is the last time you had candy?: Over a month ago.

Have you ever taken back an ex or friend after they done something bad?: Yes.

What did you last borrow?: My mom’s iPad thst she let me keep while I’m here.

If you were to get arrested, what do you think it'd be for?: I have no idea. I don’t do anything.

What song did you last sing along to?: Slide by Goo Goo Dolls.

Who is someone you strive to be more like?: My mom and younger brother.

What last made you laugh?: Something on TV.

What does your hair look like right now?: It’s a mess. Good thing it’s still really short cause it would be a really tangled mess.

How many people do you know that are pregnant right now?: None that I know of.

Milk or Juice?: Juice, I guess. Last month I suddenly kinda liked apple juice. I was never a fan of that or any other juice, but I had a few little apple juice boxes here and they were actually good.

Do you like to vent on social media?: Clearly.

Did you go outside much today?: I haven’t all. Last time was May 26th, the night I was admitted here.

What would you say to someone who is having a hard time mentally?: I’m in that place too so I don’t know.

Have you read any news articles today?: Yeah and watched some of the news.

If you have any pets/kids, what are they currently doing?: My doggo is probably sleeping. I really miss her. 😔

Do you own any plaid pajamas?: No.

What is your favorite thing to put whipped cream on?: Coffee drinks and hot chocolate.

Do you know how to play pool?: I’ve never played.

Have you ever held a chicken?: No.

Do you polish your nails?: No. It’s been several years since I’ve last painted them.

Do you like to watch true crimes shows? What's your favorite? : Some, yeah. I’ll watch some stuff on the ID channel with my mom cause she loves that stuff. I liked the Unsolved Mysteries reboot on Netflix. I like some documentaries, too.

Do you remember the last time you seen a rainbow?: It’s been a long time.

What color is your pants?: I’m not wearing any, just a beautiful hospital gown ha.

Do you try to exercise every day?: No. I should with my arms.

If you have any piercings, what color is your jewelry? : My ears are pierced, but I’m not wearing earrings.

Do you know your blood type?: I do now, finally. I should have known that already a long time ago, but yeah.

Have you ever purchased anything from American Eagle?: Yeah.

Can you hear any birds from where you are?: No.

Do you like the music being released in the 2020's?: Yeah, some of what I’ve heard anyway. I haven’t been keeping up or really listening to music the past couple years. It’s so weird cause I used to daily.

Would you say that you have a loud laugh? : No.

Any uncommon pet peeves?: I’m so irritable now so it doesn’t take much. The ones that come to mind specifically at the moment are pretty common ones.

Do you like any weird food combinations? : Yeah. People think ranch and eggs are weird or mustard with Pizza Rolls.

Do you own any ripped jeans?: Nah.

When you were in school, what foods did you like from the cafeteria? : The chicken sandwich, pizza, and burrito.

Do you currently see anything blue from where you're sitting?: Yeah, a few things. Like gloves, the needle disposal box, my gown, the thermometer.

How long have you been on Bzoink?: A few months.

How many surveys have you ever created?: One a very long time ago on Xanga. Wish I had saved it somewhere else.

What is your daily screen time? : It varies. Right now it’s really all I have to keep me occupied.

Have any plans for the rest of the day?: Apart from the usual, my mom will be coming in a few hours and we’re going to watch the new episode of Only Murders in the Building. I love that show. I’ve started, finished, and caught up on several shows now since being here.

#personal #text #survey #surveys

[agapemastiffs]

The Cane Corso: Your Own Personal Roman Gladiator (But Cuddlier)

The Cane Corso is a living, breathing statue (with a playful side). These athletic guardians boast a history as rich as your grandma's lasagna recipe, and their loyalty runs deeper than the Colosseum dungeon. But before you start digging a moat for your new best friend, let's break down the good, the gladiator-sized, and the surprisingly snuggly of owning a Cane Corso.

From Roman Warriors to Modern Day Bodyguards:

Imagine a world without fences. That was life for the Romans, who used these powerful pups for everything from fighting alongside warriors to guarding livestock (because apparently, togas weren't enough of a deterrent). These weren't your average guard dogs – Cane Corsos were basically furry gladiators, with the strength and agility to take down anything that threatened their humans. Much like their counterpart the Neapolitan Mastiff.   After the Roman Empire chilled out, Cane Corsos almost disappeared, surviving in secret dog fight clubs in southern Italy ( kidding, kind of). Luckily, some dog lovers stepped in and brought these incredible creatures back from the brink. Today, they're sought-after companions who are as happy cuddling on the couch as they are keeping an eye out for danger.

A Loyal Protector with a Playful Streak:

The Cane Corsos lifespan is approximately 9–12 years, which is longer than the average for a giant-breed dog. Cane Corsos are like cuddly warriors – fiercely loyal and protective of their families, but with a playful side that makes them fun companions. They're smart and eager to please, which means training can be a breeze (as long as you ditch the whole dominance thing). However, their independent streak is real. The English Mastiff can also be very playful as well. Early socialization is key to preventing them from becoming suspicious of strangers. Think of them as the security guards of the dog world – they'll let everyone know who's boss, but would rather play fetch than tackle someone (unless they really need to).

Owning a Roman Athlete: Exercise Needs and More:

Cane Corsos are not couch potatoes. These athletic doggos need regular exercise and mental stimulation to be happy. Daily walks, playtime, and activities that challenge their brains are a must. Their athleticism makes them perfect for active owners who enjoy running, hiking, or showing off their doggo parkour skills.

Owning Cane Corso Puppies means having a house that resembles a small Roman villa (with a yard, of course). Apartments or cramped spaces are a no-go for these large breeds. A fenced-in yard is their personal Colosseum, giving them space to roam and unleash their inner gladiator (minus the actual fighting). Grooming is a breeze (think one or two brushings a week), but their shedding might require a team of maids (or a good vacuum cleaner). Regular vet checkups, a healthy diet, and keeping them at a good weight are key to a long and happy life for your furry athlete.

Training Your Loyal Companion: Respect is Key:

Cane Corsos are smart, but their independent streak can make traditional training methods a challenge. Positive reinforcement with treats and praise is your best bet. They want to please their humans, so positive vibes go a long way. Early socialization is crucial to prevent fearfulness or aggression later in life. Think of it as teaching them proper doggy etiquette – gotta know how to interact with other creatures (especially the smaller ones).

Who Should Adopt a Cane Corso?

These aren't your average lapdogs. The ideal owner has an active lifestyle and a house that resembles a small castle (with a secure yard, of course). Experience with large breeds is a plus, as their size and strength require a confident and capable handler. Families with older children who understand canine behavior can find a loyal companion in a Cane Corso. But first-time dog owners, those with small children, or inhabitants of tiny apartments might want to consider a smaller guardian, like a fluffy pug (minus the gladiator skills).

The Unwavering Loyalty of a Modern Guardian:

If you can provide the space, care, and consistent training a Cane Corso requires, the rewards are epic. Their unwavering loyalty, athletic spirit, and protective nature make them cherished companions. The Tibetan Mastiff is also very loyal to their owner. Owning a Cane Corso isn't just about having a dog; it's about welcoming a guardian with a proud history and a heart of gold into your life.

In Conclusion:

The Cane Corso is a breed unlike any other.  Their imposing size embodies the spirit of the Roman arena, while their athleticism and intelligence make them capable partners in modern adventures.  Carefully consider the responsibilities involved in owning one of these majestic creatures. If you can provide the leadership, training, and love they deserve, a Cane Corso will reward you with a loyal friend and a protector for life.

A Watchful Protector: For The Progression Of The Ages

Mastiffs, gentle giants with ancient roots, come in various breeds. Loyal guardians with calm temperaments, they require ample space, training, and experienced owners due to their size and strength. Though some breeds have wrinkles, all Mastiffs offer a lifetime of devotion.

#mastiffs #cane corso #Cane Corso puppies #pets #guardians

[deafeningbelieverdreamland]

Guess what species it is this time 😎That’s right we’re moving on to doggo’s and humanoid dog peeps in general! Thanks for the people who participated in the last poll on Twitter y’all are good motivators. Now, for some headcanons.

Now as usual first thing that comes to mind is heats/ruts experiences for them. Heats/ruts will occur every 2 months and last about 2 weeks which is a very anxious time for them. Not to mention if it’s a heat, a lot of bleeding. Like, so much blood it’s miserable. But if they exercise during this time it can help ease them. Or ya know, a nice fuck will do that for it too lmao. Now even if ya do get sussy during this time unlike the others it is unique in the fact that even that won’t simply solve it. Basically, no speed running a heat/rut through breeding. Every species interprets scents differently and dogs are no exception. Now an interesting thing to note is that while they have a good sense of smell(maybe even more so than the cats) they actually hardly ever put it to use. Because unless they’re trained to hone this sense it’s about as useful as asking a human to sniff something out. Not to mention they can notice someone smells a bit off but won’t pick up that others were near you. Now they’re good at tracking potential mates so be weary of that. Pheromones like that will always strong enough for em. As it is for the rest of the world. Now surprisingly enough they don’t have a moon phase tied pup relationship like the cats do but they do think they’re genes are stronger. And we’ll they’d be right! Usually if they mate outside of their own or if a human even has 15% of that on their side it has a good chance of being a species or crossbreed with a lot of noticeable doggo traits. And like humans their pups are just referred to as pups. Adorable I know. Now obviously this is a super generalization of em but that’s what happens when anything looking like freaking Odie to Inupara gals are involved. Let me know if there are any other species ya wanna suggest and yes reapers and maybe even more cybernetic like creatures will be next but that’s for the next poll voters to decide 👀

#omegaverse #a/b/o dynamics #a/b/o universe #alpha beta omega #omegaverse au #omegaverse headcanons #species spotlight

[pomrania]

I asked for breeds of dogs to draw as pokemon types, and here they are. Some are more recognizable than others, both in type and dog breed, and some look better than others, and some were easier than others; but it was good practice.

Below the cut, there’s my running commentary throughout the process, preserved for posterity. Basically it’s just me complaining about things, but if you want to read it, that’s your decision.

WHY DID I THINK I COULD DO THIS, this was artistic hubris.

Okay, look up a compilation video for the first breed on the list, that should provide a good point of reference.

Heh goldies are funny doggos.

Okay this isn't actually so bad once I get into it.

FUCK HOW DO YOU DRAW HINDQUARTERS

Okay I remember what beagles look like, this video is a good refresher; I slept with a stuffed toy beagle when I was a kid, I got the general stuff down.

HOW THE HECK DO I MAKE THIS INTO A GHOST-TYPE

So I guess I'm going with ghostly extra wagging tails, sure why not.

A dragon-type borzoi, okay, these dogs already look like dragons, this should be easy. ...words spoken just before disaster, I know it.

Heheh them doggos got long snoots.

What was that heraldic unicorn pose again, that should work well for them....

This looks just like a dog and not like a dragon-type DAMMIT.

Next is CORGI hell yeah! They're so hecking CUTE, and I know I won't be able to draw them to their full adorable, but at least I'll have fun watching the reference video.

This seems to be coming along well.

I wasn't planning on colouring them, but I might have to, to get the markings shown properly. But that will be AFTER I've done everything else.

Flying-type samoyed! I love samoyeds, they're so FLOOFY. Well actually the person suggested air-type, but euh.

Okay I have a good idea for this one. Don't know how well it'll turn out, but that's art for you.

Okay yes this is adorable and I love it.

Most of what I know about rottweilers, is that pretty much all of them that I've met, have been aggressively friendly, like "knock you over in an effort to lick every square inch of your face" aggressively friendly. Not really sure how I can convey that, or how I can show a rock-type, but that's what "trying things and seeing what happens" is for.

Oh frick I'm gonna have to draw 3D geometrics for the "rock" stuff ain't I.

Hm a "geode" type design might be cool; I'm prolly not the best person for that, but I'll bloody well try anyways.

Aaand I hit a major block, what even POSE do I use for this. Gah. Welp, when in doubt, go for the most basic stuff possible. Can I do better than that? Yes. WILL I do better than that, right at this moment? Probably not.

Rotties are big chonks aren't they.

Hm. Okay this doesn't necessarily look very "rottweiler", but it DOES cover up a bunch of my mistakes in anatomy, and I've always thought this style looks cool.

...I think I'm just going to skip "fighting-type boxer", since I'm willing to bet actual money that someone has already drawn that, it's just so obvious. And also this was one of two suggestions, so I don't feel guilty about ignoring that person (because I didn't ignore them).

Labs are like the most "generic" looking dogs I can think of, how am I gonna do this cool?

Two compilation videos later, I don't even have a CONCEPT in mind. The best idea I have is something playing off of a snowman, but that's literally it; those words, no image.

Heh, maybe one jumping in the air with a dopey expression to catch a snowflake? Seems a bit complicated, but I'll think on it.

Huh I don't think I've ever drawn a dog chasing their own tail before. It's a good exercise in posing and "okay if this motion is being made, how would the limbs move". Still frustrating though.

But how do I make it ICE-TYPE?! At least I have some vague ideas for the next one, but that's for ONCE I'VE FINISHED THIS ONE.

...I'm at a loss. I'm going to look up ice-type pokemon for some inspiration.

So it seems to be mostly shown in colouring, WELL THAT'S NO HELP TO ME.

Screw it I'm going basic as hell. ...or maybe just STUPID as hell, because I decided to draw a dog wearing skates.

This was the worst of all of them, but it's DONE now.

Maltese doggos already look like fairies, but I've learned from the borzoi one, that this just makes it HARDER. (They sure are hecking adorable though.)

They're just little puffs of fur! How can I make them look distinct?

Oh yeah there's also the "show" grooming they can have.

Some vague ideas, but I'll also check the list of fairy-type pokemon for inspiration.

Okay I'm just going to go full Baby as that seems to be the general trend.

This just looks like a regular maltese.

That's not MUCH better, but it's SOMETHING, and that's the end of the list so woot I'm done.

#no fandom #fandom: pokemon #original content #not a reblog #drawing

[anogete]

Watch me vomit up my thoughts

It’s been a while, hasn’t it?  I’m sorry I’ve disappeared on everyone.  It’s been... a year.  I think that probably goes for everyone, not just me.  If you’re interested in a personal life update, then read on.  If you’re looking for an update on my writing then I regret to inform you that I haven’t written a single thing this year.  Maybe next year, though.  There is always next year, right?  I think I saw a blurb that we’re getting Sam and Bucky back in March.  And Loki shortly after.  Maybe that will be my inspiration.

I’m fortunate enough to have a job that lets me comfortably work from home.  I’m also fortunate enough to own a home.  And my last blessing is that I don’t have kids, so I didn’t have to figure out the nightmare of childcare and home schooling like some of you.  My library on the second floor of the house has been my office since mid-March.  I’ve been transitioning into the Associate Financial Advisor roll this year and that has been going well.  I’m supporting the clients I’ve worked with as an assistant for the past nine years, so it’s been easy-going.  I’m able to order my groceries for pick up to avoid going in the stores and I live in an neighborhood where it is easy to get delivery from restaurants.  I’m incredibly lucky to have all these things going for me and I am thankful every damn day.

I fell into a bit of a funk this spring and early summer, but managed to pull myself out of it in August.  I started planning my meals, walking 2-5 miles every day, and exercising on the Peloton bike I bought a year ago.  I also started reading again and zipped through almost 50 books between June and now.  By November, I was feeling strong and healthy.  I felt like I had found a balance between work and activity and self-care.  I was still coming to terms with my grandma passing in March of last year and with Ferguson (my sweet doggo) passing in September of last year.  But I was trying and things were getting better.  I felt like I had my feet underneath me.

Lemme stop you here if you don’t want to read about death and some general medical stuff.  Because that’s mostly what you’re getting from here on out.

On November 21st, my mom texted me at 5:30am.  I got it right away because I usually wake up around that time, alarm or not.  She said she had dropped my dad off at the hospital because he was having difficulty breathing.  Apparently, he’d been feeling bad for a week, but insisted to everyone that it was just his sinuses draining.  I called her and began questioning her like I was cross-examining a star witness.  I was able to piece together a really fucking shitty story.

My dad always went to a friend’s house on Friday evenings to have a couple beers and hang out.  We’d all warned him since March that he needed to stop, but he insisted it was fine.  He bought into a lot of the cavalier attitude that the Trump fans have over this virus. Plus, he was 64-years-old and didn’t take any medication so he probably thought it was no big deal.  He spent a few hours at his friend’s house on November 6th.  Unbeknownst to anyone at the time, he received a call from that friend on November 11th that the friend and the friend’s wife had tested positive for COVID.  He didn’t share this info with my mother, my brothers, or my uncle, all of whom had been near him.  By November 15th, he was coughing but insisted it was drainage when my mom suggested he take something for it and go to the doctor.  By November 18th, he was worse and admitted to my mom that his friend had tested positive but that he hadn’t seen him for almost two weeks so his problems were just sinus-related and not COVID.  My mom hates confrontation, so she accepted this and didn’t tell anyone, including me and my brothers.  By November 19th, he had a fever and was having trouble breathing along with a persistent cough.  He finally agreed to take some cold medicine, but refused to call his doctor’s office despite my mom asking him many, many times.  At 4:30am on November 21st, he woke my mom and asked her to take him to the hospital because he couldn’t breathe well.  She dropped him off and returned home to text me since they wouldn’t allow her in the building.  She also texted my brothers, who admitted that they felt like they’d had a cold for several days.  I live 4 hours away and haven’t traveled since March, so I hadn’t seen any of them.

A nurse called my mom a couple hours after she dropped my dad off to tell her that he was positive for COVID and pneumonia and they were admitting him to put him on a bipap.  From what I understand, that’s the oxygen mask that pushes air into your lungs.  Later that day, the health department called my mom and told her to quarantine for two weeks.  My mom cooperated and gave them my brothers’ phone number (they live together), my uncle’s phone number, and the name and number of the person we suspected my dad was infected by (his friend).  My brothers opted to get tested and were positive.  They quarantined for two weeks and had mild to moderate symptoms (brief fever, very tired, cough, drainage).  My mom had virtually no symptoms with the exception of some drainage that she took Mucinex for.  She didn’t get tested, but she lived and slept in the same bed with my dad for a week while he was symptomatic.  If my brothers got it from 30 minutes in the same room as him, surely she got it as well.  My uncle and his son got tested, but they were negative.

My dad was cooperative with the doctor and nurses at first, but as the first day wore on he became irritated.  He’d been without his chewing tobacco (yes, I know: eww) for several hours and was going through nicotine withdrawal, but wouldn’t admit that to the nurses or doctor.  The next day he was put in ICU, still on the bipap, and even more unruly and rude to the staff taking care of him.  They called my mom to ask her to talk to him and convince him to cooperate.  They said if he couldn’t recover on the bipap and required a ventilator then “things would be very bad.”  My mom tried to talk to him by text and he just continued to insist that he was well enough to come home.

I used to be close to my dad when I was a kid, but we’d grown apart over my adulthood.  Over the past 20 years, my dad morphed into someone different.  Everyone around him, especially my grandmother, told me they saw this happen the same as I did.  The result was that my dad became someone I didn’t like and didn’t want to spend time with.  He also didn’t seem to know how to talk to me anymore.  To be fair, I didn’t give him much help in that regard.  I texted him to see how he was doing and the conversation quickly devolved into him complaining about the care and insisting he was well enough to come home.  I tried to reason with him and appeal to his love for my mom by saying that my fear was him coming home and giving her the virus.  He told me that he’d decided he was no longer contagious and this was just a bunch of bullshit.  This conversation via text continued through Monday and Tuesday (November 23rd and 24th), but it took a turn for the delusional.  The doctor can only assume that the virus and the lack of oxygen had resulted in hallucinations and delusions.  My dad told my mother and I that he was in an office building owned by a man named Mr. Pritt.  He said he was the only patient and that this man was having his workers experiment on him and that they would eventually kill him.  He demanded that we come get him immediately so he could recover at home.  When we told him he’d die if he came home because he was too sick, he insisted he wasn’t sick at all and became very angry with us.  He accused both my mom and I of conspiring to kill him because we wouldn’t help him.  One day he told me that I’d confirmed what he’d known all along.  I asked him what that was and he said, “That I always loved you more than you loved me.”  This really hurt because even though I knew he was loopy, I also knew that he’d probably actually had that though before.

He began refusing treatment on those days and wouldn’t accept the steroids they were trying to give him and raised hell when they tried to take him for a chest x-ray.  He also told them he didn’t want to be placed on a ventilator even though he had agreed to one when he was admitted.  He was texting all of his friends and telling them he needed a ride home.  He attempted to get up and leave the hospital twice, falling in the floor both times because he was so weak from lack of oxygen once he took the mask off.  He also told my mom and I that he was secretly removing the mask when the nurses couldn’t see to prove to them that he wasn’t sick.  He was taking and sending blurry pictures to us of the room as “evidence.”  He told my mom to forward the pictures to “the feds.”  The pictures were of his hospital bed, the whiteboard with his nurses’ and doctor’s names on it, his IVs, etc.  By the morning of Wednesday, the 25th, I was getting some off-the-wall texts from him.  He was begging us to come check him out of the hospital at that point and we were trying to play along and tell him we were getting everything in order for him to come home soon.  Eventually, he told me that he wasn’t getting out of there alive and that he loved me.  I told him I loved him too and begged him to do whatever the doctor said because the doctor wanted to help him get better.

A few minutes later, the nurse called my mom and asked if she’d been on the phone with my dad.  My mom said she and I hadn’t spoken to him by any way other than text since he arrived at the hospital.  The nurse said he had been on the phone with a woman, trying to convince her to come get him.  The nurse made him put the call on speaker so she could tell the woman that he wasn’t well enough to leave.  Because she was concerned that her message didn’t get through before my dad hung up, she called my mom to make sure he hadn’t convinced my mom to check him out against medical advice.  My mom assured her that we had no intention of breaking him out of the hospital, but she didn’t know who the woman was.  It wasn’t her or me.  We called a long-time former co-worker of my dad’s that I’ve known since I was a kid and she said she hadn’t talked to him.  We called his best friend and asked if he’d called and spoken to the man’s wife.  Not her either.  More on this later.  I’m sure you know where it’s going.

We were stumped, but didn’t have time to deal with it because the nurse practitioner called and told my mom that my dad was delusional and could no longer make his own decisions.  They said he had no chance of survival if they didn’t put him on a ventilator immediately.  My mom called me.  I told her to agree to it.  The nurse called her back and gave the phone to my dad.  He had agreed to the ventilator as well and wanted to tell my mom that he loved her and me and my brothers and his dog.  His speech was slurred and muffled from the bipap mask, but she at least heard that.  They intubated him right after the call.  He was on a paralytic for a week.  When they backed off on the paralytic, they had to increase his oxygen.  A week later, the nurse tried to kindly tell us that he wasn’t getting better and his chances of survival were low.  She suggested we start to talk about turning off the ventilator and letting him go.  We did talk about that, which was very upsetting for everyone, but the doctor said he’d been on the ventilator for two weeks and we’d give him one more week to see what happens.  By this point, he no longer had pneumonia. But the damage COVID did to his lungs couldn’t be repaired.

The ventilator was on full blast (highest pressure, highest oxygen) just to keep him somewhat stable.  The days were ticking by and he still wasn’t making progress.  Any step forward was followed by a bigger step back. My mom would call and get the update from the nurse most days, but I did call myself a few days.  When I’d call and talk to the nurse, I’d get a grim picture that my mom didn’t seem to get or understand. I talked to her on December 12th and asked her if she was trying to protect my brothers and I or if she really thought he was going to get better.  She admitted that she’d had a feeling for days that he wasn’t going to get better.  We decided to just wait for the doctor to call.  The nurse called my mom on Monday, December 14th and told her that my dad’s blood pressure was all over the place and they were struggling to keep him stable, that the ventilator was turned up to the highest settings and it was barely enough to keep him going.  My mom texted me and told me she asked them to call me.  The doctor called me within about 20 minutes and basically told me that my dad wasn’t going to make it.  They’d had him on a ventilator for 19 days and within a couple days his throat tissue would likely become necrotic from the pressure of the cuff keeping the tube in place.  They could only continue the ventilator if they could put in a trach and he wasn’t stable enough for that.  In addition, he needed more support than the ventilator could provide.  I was told he was either going to go into cardiac arrest while on the ventilator and die or they’d be forced to take him off the ventilator because of the damage to his throat.  The most damning thing he told me was that he’d removed the sedation but my dad didn’t wake.  He wasn’t responsive, wouldn’t squeeze their hands, wouldn’t flinch when they tested his reflexes, nothing.

I was told we could come sit with him and say goodbye when the ventilator was removed.  I asked when and the doctor said soon.  I live 4 hours from my parents, so I told him I’d leave right away and have my mom call to make arrangements for me to come to the hospital.  I called my mom and told her all this and asked her to let the hospital know.  I packed a bag and rushed out the door.  On my way out of town, the doctor called me back and asked if I was on my way.  My mom had told them that we’d come by the next morning and he was worried my dad wouldn’t make it through the night.  So, I had to have a shitty conversation with my mom about how we couldn’t schedule my dad’s death for 7am on Tuesday, that it needed to happen at 8pm on Monday.  I do not recommend these types of calls.

I got into town around 7pm and picked my mom up because she’d decided she wanted to come with me.  My brothers said they couldn’t handle it and decided to stay at my mom’s house.  My mom and I were taken to the COVID floor, given gowns, and gloves, told he was COVID positive so we’d need to continue to wear our cloth masks (no medical mask, is that safe?!), and escorted to his room in the ICU.  Guys, he looked so fucking tired and so sad.  It was heartbreaking.  The nurse said their ICU was full and most of the patients were in the same shape as my dad.  We talked to him for a few minutes, held his hand and all that shit.  He didn’t respond in any way, so I don’t know if he was even there.  We stepped out of the room while they removed the tube and gave him some medicine.  When we went back in, his breaths were labored and it looked like he was gasping for air. My mom almost lost it because she wasn’t expecting that.  I told her she could go wait in the hall and I’d stay with him until he passed.  The nurse was kind enough to give him a little more medicine to make it less dramatic, but it was still difficult watching him breathe in that way.  My mom sat so she couldn’t see his head to make things easier on herself.  We sat there with him for about 40 minutes before he passed away at 8:32pm on Monday, the 14th.

I stayed with my mom last week and helped her arrange a private graveside service and the burial.  She wanted to do a funeral and I thought that was the worst idea, so we agreed on doing a celebration of life next year when things are a little better (hopefully).  To my knowledge, I haven’t had the virus.  I operated under the assumption that my mom and brothers had it and were immune for now and wouldn’t transmit it.  So, I was able to be with them without mask, but I did wear a mask when anyone else was around.  I can’t say the same for the fucking funeral director and the locksmith’s employee who opened my dad’s safe for us, though.  I live in a bigger city and mask wearing is pretty wide-spread here, but I saw so many people in my hometown (a more rural area) who didn’t bother with them.

Anyway, while all these graveside preparations are going on my mom goes through the bag of personal items from my dad that the hospital gave us.  She tossed his clothes in the washer and placed his two rings into a bag to give to the funeral home so he could be buried in them.  She also pulled out his wallet and his cell phone.  His wallet has a picture that was obviously cut from an old driver’s license of a woman named Deb.  Apparently, this woman lives in Florida and had attended junior high school with my dad.  About two years ago, my parents took a trip to Florida and visited with her for several days.  She even friended my mom on Facebook.  So, the old driver’s license picture of her was very weird.  What was even more disturbing?  His wallet also contained a plastic bag of hair that very obviously is not my mom’s.  And there was a piece of paper with three phone numbers on it.  His phone was locked with a PIN and was set to wipe itself after 20 incorrect tries.  I did tried to break into it, but wasn’t successful.  My mom admitted that she suspected he’d been talking to someone on his phone for years, but she never directly confronted him about it.  She’d just make comments about him always texting on his phone and being secretive.  Two Christmases ago he bought her a ring at a store that she has an online login to.  This particular store posts the receipts for all purchases linked to the customer’s account to the website.  She saw that my dad had purchased two pieces of jewelry even though she only received one.  My dad has never in his life bought me a Christmas present without my mom assisting, so she knew it wasn’t for me.  She still didn’t confront him, though.  She just told him that she could see the itemized receipts online.

I sympathized with my mom because I’ve experienced the infidelity of a partner in a relationship and if I were her then I’d want to know.  But I also told her that I don’t know digging into it will make things any better and may not even give her the truth.  He’s gone and there is nothing that can be done about that or anything else.  While I was running errands for her the day before the graveside service, she messaged Deb in Florida and asked if she wanted her picture back.  She also called the three phone numbers in his wallet.  One went to Deb.  The other two were the cell phone and work phone of my dad’s best friend’s wife, Anne.  The same friend and wife who likely gave the virus to my dad.  My mom told me when I got back that she’d done this and admitted she’d always felt like my dad was talking to Anne and might have an inappropriate relationship with her.  I suspect my mom is right.  Gut instinct is usually accurate.  She said she didn’t think anything physical was going on with Deb, but she did think my dad was carrying on a flirtatious relationship with her via text.  In both cases, he tried to hide it.  And if you hide it, then you know it’s wrong.  That night Deb messaged my mom back and said she had heard about what happened to my dad and was very sorry.  She said that my dad was always clear that he was married and nothing went on that was inappropriate, but that he gave her someone to talk to when her husband was sick and dying five years earlier and they’d always kept in contact.  Again, I don’t think my mom can count on anyone to give her the full story without spin or deceit.  A couple days ago, she texted me a picture of a receipt from my dad’s truck.  It was from last Christmas from a department store.  It had two pieces of jewelry on it.  She looked them both up using the UPCs listed and found the necklace he gave her last year and a ring she doesn’t recognize.  We don’t know if he was giving this jewelry to Deb in Florida or Anne, his friend’s wife.  Or someone else we don’t even know about.  And we’re probably never going to know.  Do I want to call Deb and Anne and tell them I want to full story?  Fuck yeah.  Do I think it will fix anything?  Fuck no.

TL;DR?  I finally found some balance in my life late this summer.  This balance was destroyed when my dad got COVID and died after three weeks in the hospital.  And when you’ve already got a not-so-great relationship with your dad, you get all kinds of feels when he dies in a traumatic way and then you find out he’s been screwing around on your mom.  I also have lots of anger toward him for knowingly exposing my other family members to the virus simply because he didn’t want to own up to getting it after doing something we’d all told him to stop doing.

Health-wise?  I think I’m okay.  It’s been almost ten days since I was with him in the hospital and seven days since his graveside service.  I haven’t had any symptoms yet and I think most people show symptoms by now.  Regardless, I’ve been at home since I returned last Thursday evening and I intend to stay home until January 2nd.  My boyfriend is also home and will be here until January 2nd as well.  Just to be safe.  My brothers are mostly recovered, but both still have a bit of a cough.  My mom never had much in the way of symptoms and seems fine.  My dad was 64 and overweight.  We found out once he was admitted to the hospital that his regular doctor had told him he was a diabetic and my dad insisted on “treating” that with cinnamon instead of actual medicine.  Other than those things, he didn’t have any health concerns.  Be careful, ya’ll.

#Anogete in real life #personal #covid_19 #fuck covid #family #death

[oddthesungod]

Would jimbo and spocko have a dog or a cat? I like to think they have both so that Jim has someone to exercise with and spock has someone to read with - whaddya think?

Deeefinitely both, and Spock would be ridiculously good and patient at training the doggo, and thanks to it the doggo would be the best behaved dog EVER (Jim would would spoil the pupper rotten)

And the kitty would adore them both, cuz when they’re feeling cuddly they can just go to Jim who’ll give ‘em ALL the love and pets and kisses and when the kitty is not feeling like it they can go and hang out on Spocks lap, who’ll probably sense the exact amount of pets the kitty wants and no go over it 😌😌😌

#reply #anon #s’chn t’gai human loving tradition

[a-gorgeous-george]

Basic Questions

First name? Georgette

Surname? Foxworth

Middle names? Luciana

Nicknames? Gigi (by her     mother)

Date of birth? August     7th

Age? 22

Physical / Appearance

Type of clothes?

Georgette’s style is all about femineity and luxury. She wears a lot of dresses, a lot of skirts, but even her workout clothes are designer. She swears “cheap” clothes give her a rash – and who would want to mar her perfect skin like that.

How do they wear their     clothes? Tight and tailored.

What are their feet     like? (type of shoes, state of shoes, socks, feet, pristine, dirty, worn,     etc)

Georgette is rarely seen without heels on, and thanks to regular pedicures and lack of abuse, her feet are soft and pretty always.

Race / Ethnicity? Spanish     and Indonesian

Are they in good health?     Oh yes, she has a strict workout schedule and diet she sticks to… well,     actually, perhaps not, because alongside that she also lives a life of high     stress and nicotine.

Personality

Are they more optimistic     or pessimistic?

It really depends on the source of power in a situation. If it is something she has control over, she is optimistic, can’t see how something would ever not work out, but if someone else is in control, her view changes considerably and she is usually fairly certain it will fail.

Do they ever put on     airs?

When is she not putting on airs?

What bad habits do they     have? She has a serious nicotine problem.

What makes them laugh     out loud?

She isn’t really a laugh out loud type of person. She might chuckle or smile in amusement, but laughing out loud indicates a level of ease that she just does not feel around people. Also Al.

How do they display     affection?

She is very physically affectionate… I think. She has never been in a position where she felt comfortable being affectionate with a person in that way. Besides that, she shares her wealth in ways that benefit that people she cares about, shares her privilege with them. She is happy to be her friends’ sugar mama.

How do they want to be     seen by others? Beautiful and in control.

How do they see     themselves?

She very much sees herself as a lone wolf. She knows she’s beautiful, smart, capable, hardworking, but she’s alone and absolutely terrified someone will recognize it. She is also very much aware of her inner rage.

·       How are they seen by others?

Because of her past with her family and the lack of ties it provided her, Georgette was left defending herself. Her arrogance and obsessive need to believe in her own importance is directly tied to the lack of importance anyone else gave her.

Strongest character     trait?

For all her bravado and arrogance, Georgette is 100% unafraid of hard work. From her work on her blog and marketing it, her history as a beauty queen, her strict adherence to her diet and exercise routine, every aspect of her life, she has no issue knuckling down and putting in the time and effort to succeed.

Weakest character trait?

She is incapable of asking for help, as if it somehow undermines her own achievements if someone else must assist her.

How competitive are     they?

Extremely. If you want to manipulate Georgette into doing something, make it a contest. She’ll probably even know what you’re doing and still be unable to resist.

Do they make snap     judgements or take time to consider?

Snap judgements all the way, baby!!

How do they react to     praise?

Smug agreement.

How do they react to     criticism?

Strong commitment to your character’s delusion that she is anything other than amazing.

What is their greatest     fear?

Dying without ever achieving anything of substance.

What are their biggest     secrets?

Georgette is crushingly lonely. Her whole life has been spent pushing people away, trying to protect herself and prove herself, full of anger, and it has left her without anyone she can be close to.

What will they stand up     for?

Once her blog is up and running and successful, once the magazine starts to take off, she will have real issues with people saying she’s self-made. She is fully aware that even without her father’s money, her name alone carries a certain currency most people do not have. She is well aware of her own privilege in that area and will stand up against anyone who compares her achievements against someone who didn’t have that head start.

Who do they quote?

She’s a closet book nerd and might not quote directly but will frequently make allusions to literature.

Are they indoorsy or     outdoorsy? Indoorsy.

What is their sinful     little habit? Cigarettes.

What sense do they most     rely on?

Sight – how someone/something looks dictates more of her life than it should.

How do they treat people     better than them?

What people better than them?

How do they treat people     worse than them?

That seems like an unfair question when everyone is worse than them.

What quality do they     most value in a friend? She wouldn’t know.

What do they consider an     overrated virtue? Niceness.

If they could change one     thing about themselves, what would it be?

She would have people who cared about her.

What is their obsession?     Herself?

Friends and Family

Is their family big or     small? Who does it consist of?

Her mother and stepfather, father and stepmother, Jenny and Oliver (Yes, she considers Oliver as part of her family)

What is their perception     of family?

When she was barely cognizant of life, her father had an affair, had a baby, split up her family, quickly destroying the idea in her head. It is an outdated concept made to make people feel like belong to a group, no loyalty or love.

Describe their best     friend.

………. Let me get her just a friend first.

Ideal best friend?

Someone who understands her hustle. Someone she can see the inherent importance in. Someone that can still pull her out of her head and get her to have fun.

Describe their     acquaintances.

She is jealous of the closeness of Dodger’s gang, watching as an outsider and wishing desperately to be a part of it all.

Do they have any pets?

She is a massive dog person! (Get it?) But yes, she has a little doggo, Valentina.

Past and Future

What was your character     like as a baby? As a child?

Awful? Spoiled? She was raised spoiled, but after her father’s betrayal, she sought to teach him a lesson. Even as a child, she would blackmail and torture him, threatening to reveal his dirty secret to the world. She was worse to Jenny even, more easily able to take out her anger over the affair and her birth on the younger girl than the truly guilty adults.

Did they grow up     nurtured or neglected?

Neglected – but that is partly her own fault. She is as much at fault due to her reaction and actively hurting her family and her father. She lashed out and did truly awful things and crushed what bond there might have possibly been.

What is the most     offensive thing they ever said?

Oh, I don’t know… in my head, I feel like she can be a very problematic person. Add that in with her natural meanness, I am sure she has said some awful stuff.

What was their first     kiss like?

It was awful. Some other 7th grader when she was in 7th grade. Too wet. Thought he was trying to drown her.

What is the worst thing     they did to someone they loved?

Repeatedly blackmailing her father for her own benefit.

What are their     ambitions?

She wants to outshine her father, claim their last name as her own and not the sullied version her father left in the wake of his controversy. That is why her blog and future magazine is named after her.

What advice would they     give their younger self? It’s not Jenny’s fault.

What smells remind them     of their childhood? Perfume and peppermints.

What was their childhood     ambition?

Growing up, her mind stayed on the pageant world. Her ambitions usually stayed just one pageant ahead of her.

What is their best     childhood memory?

She doesn’t know if it’s real or not, just this soft memory of her father grinning and spinning around the living room with her, dressed in his coat and tails.

What is their worst     childhood memory?

Listening in from the hall as his father confessed everything to her mother, hearing her mother sobbing as he threw clothes into a suitcase.

When was the last time     they were crushed with disappointment?

The last one? She still hasn’t got over her first one.

Love

Do they believe in love     at first sight?

She only barely believes in love in any form.

·       How do they behave in a relationship?

Georgette really doesn’t do relationships, thanks to that whole “love isn’t real” thing. They usually last a month or so, but she gets bored and has no issue telling him to get lost after that point.

When did you character     last have sex? Perhaps a couple weeks ago.

What sort of sex do they     have?

She is looking for something hot, passionate, and with someone she doesn’t have to worry about calling back.

Conflict

How do they respond to a     threat?

Georgette doesn’t back down from a threat, though her means for fighting usually involves $$$ instead of doing any sort of fighting herself.

Are they most likely to     fight with their fists or their tongue? Tongue.

What is your character’s     kryptonite? Point out her lack of backup.

If your character could     only save one thing from their burning house, what would it be? Say it     with me… diamonds.

How do they perceive     strangers?

Her trust or lack of trust in them is based solely on how they look.

What do they love to     hate? Oh, that is way too long a list to put here.

What are their phobias?     Bugs of any sort.

What is their choice of     weapon? Poison.

What living person do     they most despise? Her father.

Have they ever been     bullied or teased? That would not go well for that person.

Where do they go when     they’re angry? Home, to seethe and plot.

 Work, Education and Hobbies

What is their current     job? Blogger.

What do they think about     their current job?

She has dreams of something bigger, more substantial, but she’s thankful for the success the gossip blog has had and excited to grow it.

What are their hobbies?     Painting, reading, dancing.

Educational background?     Some college.

Intelligence level?

I believe she is fairly smart, but her work ethic covers a lot of distance for her.

Favorites

What is their favorite     animal? Doggies.

What is the most     beautiful thing they’ve ever seen? Her face in the mirror.

What is their favorite     song? Ego by Beyonce

Music, art, reading     preferred? Ooooooh… probably reading

What is their favorite     color? Gold

What is their password?

Honestly it is probably a secure combination of letters put together by a professional.

Favorite food: Lasagna

What is their favorite     work of art? Judith and the Head of Holofornes

Who is their favorite     artist? Gustav Klimt

What is their favorite     day of the week? Saturday

Possessions

What is in their fridge?     A lot of water, veggies, meal prepped chicken

What is on their bedside     table? The current book she is reading, a bouquet of pink and white roses,     a gold lamp, a rose gold silk eye mask

Spirituality

Who or what is your     character’s guardian angel?

If she has a guardian angel, she would really like a word with it.

Do they believe in the     afterlife? I mean, she now knows Hades, so yeah

What are their religious     views?

Once you meet a god, you kinda realize which system of beliefs is the right one

·       How would they like to die? Painless and pretty

What is their zodiac     sign? Leo

Values

What do they think is     the worst thing that can be done to a person? Abandonment

What is their view of     ‘freedom’?

Able to make your way through life on your own two feet without having to rely on anyone else to support you.

When did they last lie?     Probably an hour ago

What’s their view of     lying? It definitely can make things easier.

When did they last make     a promise?

She doesn’t really bother. You either do things or you don’t. The rest is just extra words.

Daily life

What are their eating     habits? Healthy food prepared by a chef.

Describe their home.

Luxurious home in a gated community bought by her father.

Are they minimalist or a     clutter hoarder? Minimalist.

What do they do first     thing on a weekday morning? Drink a glass of cold water.

What do they do on a     Sunday afternoon?

She can be found putting the finishing touches on her blog post for the week.

What do they do on a     Friday night?

She can just as easily be found out dancing as home alone working.

What is the soft drink     of choice? She doesn’t drink soda.

What is their alcoholic     drink of choice? Merlot.

Miscellaneous

What or who would your     character dress up as for Halloween? Anything sexy.

Are they comfortable     with technology? She can do basic things.

If they could save one     person, who would it be? Jenny.

If they could call one     person for help, who would it be? Over her dead body.

What is their greatest     extravagance? Jewelry

What is their perception     of redemption? She hopes it’s real.

What would they do if     they won the lottery? It would change her life 0%.

What is their favourite     fairytale?

She isn’t really big on fairytales, but definitely prefers the darker original versions. So much more realistic than that happily ever after in love bullshit.

Do they believe in happy     endings?

She believes in the ability of a person to make their own damn happy ending.

What is their idea of     perfect happiness?

Surrounded by a family that loves her

If your character could     travel through time, where would they go?

She has it on good authority that life gets more uncivilized the farther back you go, so she’s good, thanks.

If they could have a     superpower, what would they choose?

Full on mind control. She’ll make you do what she wants and feel no guilt.

#watasks #{beauty for the beholder}

[viking-raider]

Wing-Dog *Fic Request*

Summary: You’ve heard of a Wing-Man? Well, Kal Cavill is a Wing-Dog! You’re hired to watch Kal, while Henry films the second season of The Witcher, and in true Wing-Dog fashion, Kal has plans for you and Henry.

Pairing: Henry Cavill/Reader

Word Count: 2,443

Rating: G for Fluff, Kal Fluff, Doggo cuteness 

Inspiration: Request by @romyr4​

Author’s Note: Romyr messaged me this request and it’s been on my mind ever since! Kal is such a special part in Henry’s life, that if Kal took to someone so much, Henry probably would too.

Tag List: @jennylovelyheart, @peakygroupie, @jessevans​ @MITZWINCHESTER @rosie-loves-things​, @ohjules​, @mary-ann84​, @omgkatinka​, @hm-fck​, @the-freak-cassie-131​, @heelsamizayn​, @agniavateira, @cap-barnes, @romyr4​, @michelehansel, @katiebriggs004-blog​

“Henry, this is y/n.” The producer introduced the pair of you on the set of the new season of the Witcher. “She's the one your agent asked us to hire, to watch Kal while you're filming.” She explained, smiling between the pair of you. “Y/n, this is Henry.”

“Obviously.” You chuckled, extending your hand to the actor. “It's a pleasure to meet you.”

“You as well.” Henry nodded, shaking your hand. “Do you have experience with large breed dogs, like Kal?” He asked, sounding like the protective dog dad he came off as.

“I know a lot about them.” You assured him, nodding back. “I've had large breed dogs all my life, and I am the one that takes care of them at the veterinary and doggy daycare business, I work for.”

“So, you're a Vet as well?” He asked, raising an eyebrow at you.

“Vet tech,” You corrected him, carefully. “I'm still going to school to become a full blown Vet.” You explained to him. “I have another year of school.” You added, knowing that was probably going to be the next question out of his mouth.

“You are a little dinky, for Kal.” Henry replied, crossing his arms over his chest, but the smile and spark in his eyes told you he was teasing you, making you blush.

“If I can throw down with a fully grown, two hundred pound, male Great Dane, I'm sure I can survive Kal's buck thirty.” You countered, giving Henry a mischievous smirk.

Henry nodded his head, impressed. “We'll see.” He told you, turning. “I'll go get him.”

“How did you throw down with a Great Dane?” the Producer asked, looking at you, surprised.

“I rode it like a horse.” You joked, making them laugh. “No, it's just about knowing how to stop them.” You told her, pulling a treat out of you pocket. “Works, every time.”

“We'll see, cause here comes the Bear.” The producer said, seeing Kal running at the pair of you, full sprint.

“Aww, he's beautiful.” You commented, changing your stance and then held up the treat in your hand, making Kal slide to a halt and sit inches in front of you. “You're an incredibly good sitter too.” You added to him, giving him the treat and a pat on the head. “Good enough for you?” You asked, looking up at Henry, who stood several feet away, shock on his face.

“That's all I need to know.” Henry nodded, closing his mouth. “I do have conditions,” He told you, coming to stand behind Kal. “I want a photo of him every couple of hours, just to make sure he's all right, and a text, if you take him anywhere off the lot.”

“That's fair and very doable.” You nodded, meeting his eyes.

“Great.” Henry felt good leaving Kal with you, while he worked. “This is my phone number.” He swapped numbers with you, and handed you Kal's leash. “I'll text you, when I'm finished working.”

“Aye aye, Witcher.” You giggled as Henry walked away to hair and make-up. “So, Kal, what do you wanna do?” You asked, smiling down at the black and white Bear.

“Kal!” Henry yelled as the Akita took off around his trailer.

“Bear!” You yelled back, as Kal jumped up on you, excitedly.

“I swear, sometimes it seems he's more excited to see you, than he is to see me.” Henry commented, coming around the trailer to greet you.

“He knows who has all the treats.” You laughed, as Kal sniffed at the zipped up treat pouch on your hip. “Good morning, Henry.” You said, finally greeting the Brit.

“Good morning, y/n.” He greeted you back, smiling softly. “I'll let you two do whatever it is, the two of you do all day.” He said, patting Kal on the head and walking off.

“I got something for you.” You said to Kal, after Henry had gone.

You lead Kal over to your trailer, disappearing inside for a moment and came back out with a ball. You'd been taking care of Kal for just over two months, and in that time, he'd destroyed nearly every ball he'd gotten his jaws on. But, after talking to one of the other Vet Techs, you'd found this ball, that was meant to be indestructible. But, you'd find out if it really was, in the next couple of days that Kal had it.

“You ready?” You asked him, grinning to see his eye glued to the solid, red rubber ball, and bark. “See what you got?” You said, and took off running, making him chase after you.

You laid down in the grass panting as your two hour alarm went off. It was you, that was supposed to be getting Kal exercise and tired out, but it was completely the other way around. He nudged at your head with his cold wet nose, drooling on you as his tongue hung out the side of his gaping mouth. You patted the ground next to you, and Kal obediently laid down beside you, rolling onto his back for dramatic affect.

“You're just mocking me now.” You teased him, digging into your pocket for your phone and turning the camera on. “Say Treats for Daddy!” You said, tilting your head towards Kal's and snapped the photo Henry wanted every two hours.

Henry's phone vibrated on his set chair, and he picked it up between takes. Opening his messages, he grinned at the photo you'd just sent him, you looking totally beat, and Kal looking like he was have a blast, and could go a few miles more.

“Who's babysitting who?” Henry texted you back.

“If I'm still alive, when you get off work, then you'll know.” You texted back, and made Henry laugh even more.

Henry had finished filming for the day, and made his way to your trailer, which is normally where he'd find you and Kal at the end of the day.

“I'm sorry, I won't do it again!” Henry heard you yell, from the over side of your trailer, as he raised his hand to knock, then heard you yelp and the thump of you falling down. “Y/n?” He called, moving around to the other side.

“I promised not to do it again!” You laughed, hands holding on to the thick fur of Kal's neck.

Henry stood by the side of your trailer, seeing Kal standing over you and licking at your face as you melted into hysterical laughter. You grunted as Kal dropped his heavy body on top of you, but kept laughing and playfully struggling against the big Bear.

“Mercy!” You howled in laughter. “Just tell me what the ransom is!” You told Kal, letting your arms fall to the sides as he kept licking at your face and drooling all over you. “I'll give you all the treats!” You tried bargaining with him. “I swear! All the treats and no more fake throws!”

Biting into his lip to keep from laughing himself, Henry looked around and saw the small treat bag you usually carried around sitting on the ground, and stooped to pick it up. “Kal.” He called, chuckling as you continued to beg for mercy.

“Oh, thank god, a Witcher!” You laughed even harder, turning your face towards Henry, who was still in costume and wig. “Please, Witcher! Pay this beast, it's ransom!”

“What do I get out of it?” Henry asked, turning on his Geralt voice. “I doubt there's any treats in here, I'd like.” He bounced the bag in his hand. “There's definitely no coin.”

“I'll be at your mercy!” You giggled, moving your head out of the way of another attack by Kal. “Name your price, Witcher!” You stopped struggling with Kal and laid limp beneath him, out of breath from running with Kal, and laughing.

“You let me repay you, for taking care of Kal so well.” Henry told you, using his normal voice again. “Come to dinner with me, tonight.”

“Well,” You panted and motioned to Kal, who just laid on top of you now. “I don't have much of an option, do I?” You said, looking over him over.

“No, you don't.” Henry grinned, taking out his phone and snapping a pic of the two of you.

“You're just living for this, now.” You laughed, smiling at him.

“I really am.” Henry nodded, opening the treat pouch. “Kal, treat?” He called to him, holding out a palm full of them.

Kal perked up at the word treat and his head swung around to him, his nose sniffing at the air between him and Henry. Henry made a noise and Kal shot up and ran for him, colliding into Henry's legs and devoured the treats he had for him. You gasped, filling your burning and deflated lungs with the cool afternoon air, and took the hand Henry extended to you, letting him pull you up onto your feet. You dusted yourself off and looked up at Henry, seeing the smirk still lingering on his lips as he looked down at you.

“Pick you up in an hour?” He asked, lifting a brow at you.

“I'll be ready.” You blushed.

The three of you parted ways and you took a quick shower and pulled on some decent clothing for a dinner. You opened your trailer door at Henry's knock and smiled at him, relieved he was just as decently dressed as you were, his hair still wet from the shower he'd apparently also took. You followed him to his car and buckled your seat belt as he slid into the driver's seat beside you.

“What was that ball you got Kal?” He asked, looking at you as he started the car. “He's had that thing for a while now, and it's still, more or less, in one piece.”

“One of my fellow Vet Techs suggested it to me, after she asked me why I kept picking up new ones.” You chuckled, brushing your still wet hair behind your ear.

“I'll have to grab some more from you, before filming is done.” Henry smiled, glancing at you. “But, we've got several more months of that.” He added.

“We got the time.” You agreed, looking back at him.

You and Henry had dinner that night, and several more times in the following weeks. Being that you were dog-sitting Kal, and Kal nearly always went with Henry, you got to follow Henry around to the various filming locations for the Witcher; London, Budapest, Austria and the Canary Islands in Spain. It was fun to travel, even better to spend that traveling with Kal and Henry. You and Henry had become close, very close thanks to Kal, he was like the Wing-dog equivalent to a Wing-man. But, you were still paid to take care of Kal, and give Henry updates on the Akita while he was on set working. Henry hadn't heard from you in several hours, and he was an hour's drive from where you and Kal were, at your flat in London. You weren't answering his texts or his phone calls, which made Henry's already cranky day, even crankier. So, when he got off work, he rushed as quickly back to you two as the law would allow.

“Y/n?” He called, opening the door with the key you'd given him, but he received no answer, not from you or Kal. Huffing, he mounted the stairs, taking them two at a time and pushed open your bedroom door, his shoulders relaxed as Kal's head came up and quietly woofed at him.

Kal was on the bed with you, partially covered up with your blankets, you were worried he'd get cold while you took a nap, and with your arm slung over his his body, head resting on his big paw as you slept, curled up against him. Henry's heart melted, all the stress and crankiness he had throughout the day, going with it as he watched you sleep. Kal woofed at Henry a bit louder this time, making you stir, rubbing you cheek against his paw and patting his side to calm him.

“Sorry.” You heard Henry whisper to Kal, getting the hint that he didn't want Henry bothering you, and opened your eyes.

“Henry?” You whispered, sleepily rolling onto your back, as Henry moved out of your room. “What time is it?” You asked his back.

“Just past seven, at night.” Henry replied, turning back towards you.

“Fuck!” You snapped, sitting up. “I never heard my alarm go off, I only wanted to take an nap for an hour.” You said, swiping your phone off the bed stand and seeing the endless string of texts, phone calls and voicemails Henry had left you throughout the afternoon. “I'm so sorry, Henry.” You told him, looking at him, shocked and worried.

“It's all right, y/n.” He assured you, smiling softly. “Both Kal and I have been running you rabid the last several months, and I trust you enough with him.” He told you, looking between you and Kal, tilting his head to the side. “I just got a little anxious is all, it's been one of those days.”

“Well,” You shifted over in bed, and patted the open space beside you. “We can fix that.” You smiled at him, and Kal barked in agreement with you.

“I thought you were my dog?” Henry commented, sitting on bed beside you. Kal woofed, walking over you to lay down on your and Henry's legs.

“He's your Wing-dog.” You chuckled, leaning in to kiss Henry on the cheek.

“Best Wing-dog a man could have.” Henry agreed, turning his head to capture your lips with his. “and you're the best woman, I could have. You take such great care of Kal and me, while still managing to go to school.”

“Well, someone has to take care of you two silly boys.” You teased, grinning at him.

“I've got to take you on vacation after you graduate, and I've finished filming the Witcher.” Henry told you, brushing his knuckles against your cheek. “You've more than earned it.” He said, laying down with you, Kal curling up at your feet.

“All three of us have earned a vacation.” You answered, humming as Henry wrapped his arms around you, burrowing you both into the blankets and mattress.

#Henry Cavill #Henry Cavill/Reader #Henry Cavill/You #Henry Cavill Requests #Wing-Dog *fic* #Viking-Raider Fics #Viking-Raider requests #romyr4 request #Geralt #Geralt of Rivia #The Witcher #Witcher #Kal #Kal Cavill #August Walker #Mission: Impossible – Fallout #Mission Impossible: Fallout #mission impossible: fall out #Fall Out #Marshall #Walter Marshall #Nomis #Night Hunter #Superman #Clark Kent #Kal-El #Man of Steel #Fluff #Dog sitting #Wing-man

[kindahoping4forever]

going off that ask about tumblr inside jokes, i kinda want to see if we can make a list or something. i want to know how many i understand. so like for you what would someone say that would make you think 'ah its a tumblr 5sos fan'?

This is a good question! The ones already mentioned are a great start...

Inside jokes are kind of subjective because they can range from basic references (Is it balsamic?) to absurdly specific and possibly only popular among your friend group (Not fucking back in the day, RECENTLY) so I went more with points of discussion where if I heard someone mention it, it would make me 👀:

- Ashton = Daddy (a timeless topic, really)

- Calum = Oral King

- Cashton = Soulmates

- Protect Michael at all costs

- Luke wearing makeup (specifically that video during release week but really ANY time, we're not picky)

- If you remember [insert basically any event pre-Youngblood] you deserve a veteran's discount

- If More ever gets taken off the setlist we all unstan

- Whether or not Easier has rights (ps it does)

- What happened to the MYT tour diaries?

- WHERE IS ASHTON SPEAKS TO MICHAEL??

- You wanna fuckin scream for me? / Yes Sir

- Is SGFG actually their best album or are we just nostalgic: an exercise in Hot Takes

- Ashton with This Haircut

- Duke. That's it. He's just our collective doggo.

#there are so many more so feel free to add on #also i made them mostly recent since there seems to have been an influx of new fans #so things like references to keeks and twitcams have significantly died off #anyways #let's build on this! #i can probably come up with more after i get some sleep it is 2:14am lmao #ask #roarformeprettylion #fandom things

[lovemesomesurveys]

Do you have a bad reputation?

I don’t think so. I think some give me too much credit and I’m like, oh buddy you’re so wrong.

Have you ever gone through a bad breakup?

The complicated, whatever it was relational Joseph and I had. Honestly, that and so many other things d doesn’t even seem like my life now. It feels a lifetime ago or in some other universe. SO much has changed.

Do you believe in Jesus?

I absolutely do.

Has anyone ever used a cheesy pickup line on you?

Yes.

Are you hard of hearing?

No.

Would you ever want a statue made of you?

Ew, no.

What’s the name of your best friend?

She’s mom to me.

When did you last go for a run?

It’s been years since I’ve had that kind of energy.

What is something that gives you good vibes?

The beach, fall, winter, the holidays, good books, good movies and TV shows, good food, discussing common interests.

How many bones have you broken in your life?

One.

What did you last search for?

Bzoink.

What color are your lampshades?

White.

Where are you currently?

Lying here in this damn hospital bed.

Has anyone ever called you dumb?

Not to my face, but probably. I’ve definitely called myself that.

Do you have any cats?

No. I miss my doggo so much 😩 I’ve never been away for so long.

What were you doing last time 3am came around?

Attempting sleep.

What’s your favorite love song?

Hmm. I have several.

What all did you do last night?

Watched TV, scrolled through Tumblr, slept.

What last let you down?

Myself.

How many lights do you have on?

Just the TV and my phone right now.

Have you ever had vertigo?

Yes.

Has your house ever been robbed?

No, thankfully.

Are you currently tired?

Yeah, but it’s hard to get much sleep.

When did you last get a haircut?

Cut it at home last year.

Do you ever use the slang “sheesh”?

Not often, but yeah.

Have you done a breathing exercise recently?

Yes.

What food/drink did you last waste?

A protein shake. Man, I miss actual food and drinks.

Have you ever had collard greens?

Nope.

Do you or would you ever live on a coast?

I live on the west coast.

Are you a cry baby?

Yep, that’s me.

If you have a partner, do you have a song?

—

Have you ever dug a hole? What for?

No.

Do you spend too much time in your room?

Yeah. I like my room, but also because I’ve had to spend a lot of time on bed rest the past few years.

Have you ever fainted? What from?

Yes.

What is something that is “just like heaven” to you?

The beach.

Who is someone you know who is gorgeous?

My hubby, Alexander Skarsgard of course. Ha.

Do you know a Chelsea?

No.

Would you rather kill or be killed?

Um, neither???

What’s a good habit you have?

I can list my bad ones a lot easier.

Would you rather have 12 fingers or 12 toes?

Toes. It wouldn’t affect me at all.

What’s the sweetest, best pie you’ve ever had?

Various cheesecakes.

What did you last try to do?

Just trying to take it easy and work on things day by day.

Have you broken anyone’s heart?

Yes.

Do you have brown eyes?

I do.

Are you currently barefoot?

I am.

#personal #text #survey #surveys

[modern-oedipus]

Covid Vent

No one: Nila, who goes out maybe once in a month due to covid: *listens to coffee shop sounds in youtube to get in mood*  It’s really hard to maintain social isolation now that it has been 5 months. But the cases are going up and up and up, hitting my friends and their families. I myself had to split houses with my mother because she had covid cases in her work place. I don’t think I’d isolate myself this much if I wasn’t in the risk group, but I am. Knowing that I am most likely to go to intensive care and experience the trouble breathing again like I did during the asthma treatment is not good. The potential permanent damage on lungs, for someone like me whose lungs are already more prone to sickness compared to healthy people, is also a big no, considering that I’m only in my early twenties and if everything goes well and I live a normal life I’d live around 50 more years.  50 more years with a disability or isolating myself at home? Isolation, obviously. But this pandemic doesn’t seem to be stopping anytime soon. I am only indoors because both my internships are online & college hasn’t started yet. I know that I’ll eventually have to go out if my college doesn’t switch to online education. It doesn’t scare me at all, though, I am not like, “anxious”. I’m concerned, disturbed, alert, but not in a paranoid anxiety. If I end up catching covid, I’m at least mentally prepared to deal with it. I’m also eating healthy and exercising and don’t really have health problems except for that past-lung-treatments that more or less put me to a risk group (risky enough to concern me, even though I don’t have a chronic illness), so who knows, I might just pass it like a flu as well. No one knows. It’s not good overthinking covid, all I can do is to keep social distancing & mask & hygiene, as always. I’m just so suffocated. I’m more prone to be an extrovert. Before pandemic, I’d only use my house to sleep I’d keep being out in public, attending events, ORGANIZING events, going to coffee shops, club meetings, lots and lots of stage plays, tours, everything. I’d sneak into my friends’ dorms and change cities and just so many more “normal” fun things. I was barely starting to enjoy my life again after the depression healed. Now, I’m mentally ok, but physically trapped. The “watch netflix, read books, stay home” thing is kind of overdosing me right now. I like this shit for a week maybe, not for 5 months. I don’t know how to not risk my mental health while keeping my physical health anymore. Of course, to even HAVE a mental health I need to stay alive, so I’m not complaining- health care workers, people who go to job everyday (including my parents), etc. are in such a harder situation. I know. But my own life is also valid, and while not as troubling and concerning as lives of others right now, well, I think I’m still worth caring, at least by myself. I don’t expect any extra outside compassion or validation (we all are in same situation), me writing my thoughts here is more of me just trying to see my thoughts being worded on screen so that maybe I can come up with a solution to these things as I go. Because I’ve always been a problem-solver rather than just merely venting. (I can’t always solve problems though, I need to work on accepting this fact.) Anyway, I just thought, maybe spending more time outdoors in the natural park that is close to my house could be a good thing. But it’s crowded since it’s outdoors and I really don’t want to share any commonly used areas right now. (I used to be more than okay with this before covid, as I said, I’m mostly extroverted and I like community gatherings, but I like being healthy more), so like... Idk, maybe I can just sort of have phone calls and videochats with my friends as I sit outdoors. Except I don’t even know I have that many friends anymore. I mean, I do- I surely do have bestest of friends in my life that I’m grateful for, but like. I am somehow an introvert magnet and while I’d die for most of my best friends (both irl and online) I don’t really think they are as hype about just chatting as often as I am. (I know that this doesn’t mean they love me any less. They love me in their own way & I love them in their own way so that’s OK.) So like. Maybe Nila, have this BRILLIANT idea of making more friends. Except. Like. You’re at home so you aren’t in much of social gatherings [you aren’t in any! That is insane!] and you don’t really know how to make friends from home. I mean, yes there are online friends but like. EVEN WITH THEM. How can I just *trust* them right away? I can’t, so like. I don’t know. I’m bored af.  On the bright side, today one of my bff from school called me and said he’s back in town and that we should catch up, he’s literally one of the greatest company ever and he wants to see the doggo, so I’m positive we can just have hour 9242309204 hours long in-depth chats again without getting bored (amazing to have people like that in my life). Anyway. I guess the moral of this is:

- I need to accept “the new normal”

- I need to protect myself but try to keep my mental health as good as possible because I like myself more when my mental health is fine and I can also come up with better creations then

- I need to finish my course work (internship) so that I can relax before school starts

- I need to spend more time outdoors but in isolated areas (good luck finding them!) 

- I need to recharge

- I “want to” make more friends or just check up on existing ones! I can’t use the word “need” for this because this would degrade the freedom of the other party. Friends are appreciated, and to some extend, a necessity for social creatures like us, but no “need” will make it happen. I will just make an effort to check up on my existing friends more frequently-- I’m quite selective at this, though, I prefer generally upbringing people who are mature to a certain extend (aka, no obsession, no passive-aggression. yes to personal boundaries, yes to an overall nice attitude [we all can have problems and that’s ok and that’s normal. what /I/ personally don’t wish to be around [with my all respect] is this mindset of “life is a disaster let’s be depressed” thing. I just love love my current friend circle because even if my close friends are just around 7 people, and even if we get depressed or sad or scared, our general look to life is nicer, we don’t make disasters out of regular days, we enjoy talking and chatting, which overall increases our life quality and makes it better. We also communicate & respect & listen to each other and all. I mean. It’s not like that with everyone, and that’s ok, but as I said, this is my personal preference. I prefer having bonds that are good rather than toxic and I am doing my best to be equally good, rather than being toxic to my friends. [I’m sorry I post a lot of Banana Fish to those who don’t know Banana Fish, ok. I know ur bored but like I just cannot help it. I’m trying to tone it down but BANANA FISH.] sOOOOOOOO, SOOOO that’s why it’s not how “i have 29420343204 friends uwu” mindset, like, I noticed I need to be reasonably picky with those I’m close to so that I and people I love can overall have a nice, fun days, which is point of friendship. (I mean. As I said. I’m here on bad days too. But I don’t feel mentally healthy enough to carry the burden of someone else’s depression. It hasn’t even been two months since I’m out of therapy yet, and my mental health is, while not bad, it is fragile. I’d rather not be around those who can [mostly, unwillingly] effect me badly. SO LIKE.  - that’s one hell of a long post nila, but long story short FRIENDS or you’ll die out of boredom

- also just finish your coursework i beg you

- thanks for coming to my ted talk, I actually always offer potential solutions on my vent posts, but this time i wanted to write this publicly [i dont think anyone will read this and i dont mind it] because like. why not? it’s just me thinking and I feel as if this could be of use for some people who are reading this & isolating themselves too. anyway, i love u, stay safe. 

#quarantine #covid19 #social isolation #social distancing #mental health #friendship #health #nila stuff

[halfxemptyxbabe]

I Need a friend...

Look, I know nobody actually reads these things but dude....I am so done with the bullsh*t right now. My closest “friends” aren’t even really my friends. They’re all selfish. All they do is exclude me and talk about me behind my back. I’m the fat, ugly, boyish friend. I will never be on their level. Ever since becoming friends with them I’ve gained almost 30 KILOS!!!!! Today I about broke down because work was so stressful and so I tried to confide in my friend (who is also my roommate - I live at her mom’s house, long story) and she just completely disregarded me, even though every time she’s even mildly upset about something I give her my full attention. I am so sick of everything. I want to live. I want to live SO BAD. I want to experience; to laugh, cry, dance...But I just feel like I’ll never be able to do those things as long as I am this heavy. I have an autoimmune disease so it’s hard to exercise - it hurts, alot. My friends tease me about it all the time. Obviously I feel bad that they have to park closer to the front of the stores and stuff, but I’m almost definitely sure that they believe it’s because I’m fat, not because my body is literally attacking itself. 

I’m stress eating, I feel lonely, I just want to cry. I have no privacy because I live on a couch. The only things in this world that I have are my boyfriend and my dog. But my BF lives in a different country and my dog is elderly so I’m even more broken up about it when I think of losing my little floofy doggo. 

It’s depressing that my only “friends” are my therapist, my dog, and my boyfriend. My mother hates me, my father is insane (I mean that, he’s genuinely insane. Like “the government is after me let me get my shotgun” insane) and my family have all but abandoned me. I’m in college just doing my fuckign BEST but it isn’t good enough. 

I have to be out of this apartment by august of next year, which seems totally doable until you realise I make shit money and my area is super expensive, and I can’t drive! I have crippling anxiety from being in a few car wrecks, so that’s just not an option and UGH! EVERYTHING HAS TO BE DIFFICULT AND I JUST WANT SOMEONE TO LOVE AND CARE ABOUT ME THE WAY I LOVE AND CARE ABOUT THEM OBVIOUSLY IN A PLATONIC WAY BUT IT’S SO SAD I CAN’T FEEL COMFORT FROM THE PEOPLE I’VE CALLED MY FRIENDS FOR THE LAST 7 YEARS AND OH. MY. GOD. I CAN JUST FEEL A BREAKDOWN COMING MY DUDDDDE!!! 

I can feel my heart pounding as I’m typing this. I’ve just been crying and eating oreos like a fat fuck. I’m so exhausted. I just don’t want to feel like I’m crazy for simply wanting to have decent fucking people in my life. If anyone is looking for friends, please DM me. Like, I don’t care man, I’m awkward but we can talk about whatevs. ED related or nah, it doesn’t matter to me. I’ve had good luck in this “community” before so. Yeah...Sometimes this is the only place I don’t feel alone. 

#anareksya #bulimja #disordered eating tw #tw #food tw #mentally ill

[quercussp]

Tonya’s one month anniversary

It’s now been a month since I adopted Tonya, and I honestly don’t remember what life was like before. But I think it’s important for me to process my feelings in writing, so I’m going to do just that, and feel free to skip it if it’s not something you’re interested in.

First, I just want to give a general update. In the month that we have Tonya, she has made amazing progress. Even though she is not a particularly anxious or timid dog, her confidence in our home has grown substantially, and her real personality only started coming out a couple weeks ago. 

As is the case with a lot of shelter dogs, one of her biggest problems was peeing in the house. I am glad to report that she has been accident free for more than two weeks and seems to be totally housebroken at this point. We went from going outside 8 times a day to finally go to the 4 times a day that I plan to stay at.

Her feeling much more calm has also been noticeable by the fact that she has stopped obsessively patrolling the street outside through the window and barking at everyone, by the fact that she stopped jumping at noises and that she is now more or less ok with not being glued to my side 24/7. I think when we just adopted her she immediately decided that I’m her safe space, and whenever she got scared or anxious, she would want to be right next to me. Now she’s become a little more independent and secure.

It seems that she has never had toys before, so for the first couple of days she had no idea what to do with them. The first time she played with her little stuffed duck I nearly cried, and by now she is very interested in all her toys and is getting better and better at playing.

Tonya has mastered the “sit”, “down”, “come”, “up”, “stay” and “fetch” command. Sometimes she decides she’s not in the mood, and it takes a little time to get her attention, but in general she is an incredibly smart girl and learns with incredible speed.

Another big accomplishment for us is that she is now totally ok with going into her crate. It took about two weeks of training to get her used to it, but now she will go into the crate when commanded (provided she gets a lovely treat afterwards). She sleeps in her crate and we crate her whenever we are both outside the apartment (which is quite rare), so it’s a huge relief to have her feel comfortable in it.

We’ve also made really good progress at walking on a leash and not trying to eat squirrels. Sometimes a squirrel is just too tasty to pass and Tonya starts pulling and barking, but most of the time I can now break her out of it by commanding her to come.

Of course, Tonya still has some things we need to work on. The most important thing is barking. Tonya is part corgi, and corgis are naturally very vocal, so we’re working really hard to discourage barking both for attention and at the door. Unfortunately that means ignoring the barking until she stops, which has meant a rough couple of days for our neighbors. But the good news is that Tonya is getting better, and hopefully we will be able to get past this behavior.

***

Getting Tonya has had a profound effect on my life and my mental health. My therapist has encouraged me to get a dog for quite some time, and as always, my therapist was very smart to suggest that. So here are some of the positive effects Tonya has had on my life:

1. Routine

As a person struggling with and eating disorder and depression, routine is everything for me. During this self isolation time, keeping up with a routine was very very hard, and even though I tried my best, within a couple weeks I was running out of steam and 99% of all my energy was going towards just basic functioning. Having Tonya has forced me to adapt a really strict routine which made my life so so much easier.

2. Sleep

Tonya forced me to spend most of my time outside of my bedroom (we don’t allow her in the bedroom, so now I spend all day in my home office in the living room or on the couch), which has done wonders for my quality of sleep.

3. Exercise

So this is kind of a more complicated one. In general, having Tonya has definitely increased my general level of activity, but it did decrease the time I spend intentionally exercising. I have much less time or energy to go running, but I do walk at least 4 or 5 miles a day, so I guess you lose some you gain some. But having a half hour walk before breakfast every day has definitely done a lot for my energy levels.

4. Love

That’s self explanatory.

Of course, there has also been some things that I am having a bit of trouble with.

1. Anxiety

This was especially hard the first couple weeks. I was so so worried about doing something wrong, hurting her by accident, being a bad owner, her not loving me, that the first couple weeks were kind of a nightmare anxiety wise. Now that we’ve gotten used to each other a bit, it’s gotten a bit better, but it’s still sometimes difficult to manage.

2. Cleanliness

I’m a very obsessively clean person, and there’s just objectively a lot of mess from a dog. She sheds a lot, no matter how much I wipe her paws after walks, dirt from the outside gets in, and she’s a just a dog, so there’s mess. This is something I’m still trying to learn to cope with. I try my best to control the mess, and stay calm when I can’t, but this is something that will take some time.

3. Self care

Having a dog takes up a lot of energy, so some things have to go. I don’t remember the last time I washed my face. I’ve definitely been cooking much less, have done less cleaning or other self care activities, spent a lot less time alone with myself, and so on.

4. Money

Having a dog is expensive. I know that we can afford her, but I worry about money in the best of times, and now with a reduced income due to covid, I spend a lot more time worrying about money and cutting expenses.

***

But in general, there’s nothing more rewarding than having a lovely wonderful doggo at your side. Both me and my husband are absolutely besotted with her, we love her so much, it’s kind of amazing. I don’t think it was possible to feel so much love towards someone. It’s also so amazing to watch my husband who used to say that he doesn’t like dogs at all and that this dog is mostly for me obsess about her and coo at her every time he has the opportunity, just stopping in his tracks when she’s lying down or looking at him to go “aww” and cuddling with her like crazy. She truly did bring us together even closer and make us feel like parents, which I love.

Next week we are going to start professional training, and eventually I want to train her as a therapy dog. She’s also already registered as an emotional support animal, and I want her to get some additional training as a mental health support dog. She really does have a profound effect on me and is an amazing companion. 

I love her more than words can say, and I’m eternally grateful to the universe giving her to us. I feel like we have been waiting for her our entire lives, like she was always meant to be with us, and I can’t imagine my life without her.

#tonya #personal #long post #sorry if this is boring #i need to process things sometimes

[creek-cryptid-deluxe]

This pandemic has brought out the best in some people and the worst in others (as I'm sure you've all seen in the news).

Now, despite his faults, I've always thought my father was an overall reasonable, compassionate person. During this pandemic, though, his inner boomer (he is at the very end of the age range, thus a young boomer) has emerged. Twice now he has said things that have made me equal parts disgusted and enraged.

The first instance was when he went to the pet store to get omega 3 tablets & toothpaste/toothbrush for the doggo a week ago. He text me while there "must be nice to get paid minimum wage and not give a fuck about your customers."

My response: oh yeah I'm sure that being forced to risk your life daily during a pandemic for abusive customers while not making a living wage is fucking great. Maybe cut them some fucking slack. They are exhausted, scared, & get screamed at & threatened daily by the entitled assholes who come in their store while not being able to make ends meet.

He didn't respond.

The second was today. I should preface this with disclosing that we live in a state that is prematurely reopening because our governor believes we should all sacrifice ourselves on the alter of capitalism so he & his buddies can make a buck while his constituents die. He went to pick up a to go order from a local restaurant & text me "It's hilarious watching the chaos of the dine in area reopen."

I didn't respond. Like, how the fuck is it 'hilarious' that people are being forced to risk their health during a global outbreak of a highly infectious, horrifying disease?? What the actual fuck is wrong with him? I'm deeply embarrassed to be related to him.

Additionally, this motherfucker in all seriousness suggested getting a second dog to keep our current dog company. Let's look at some facts about the conditions we agreed to PRIOR to adopting our dog & how it's worked out:

He agreed to sweep the floors at LEAST every 2 days because she sheds heavily. It has been at least 2 weeks since that last happened (and I'm being generous as it's probably been closer to a month). There are PILES of dog hair in the corners & against the walls. It's disgusting & I physically can't do the floors.

In the same vein, mopping was to take place once a week. Again, it's been probably about a month.

Dog is supposed to be washed once a week. He was putting it off until she smelled SO BAD that I gagged any time she was near me & even then, I had to threaten to rub his sheets on her to get her washed. I put an alarm in his phone that goes off as soon as he gets home every Saturday, so for the last 2 weeks he has done it & thinks he deserves heaps of praise for this.

He is supposed to handle her food & water. This means filling & washing the bowls, as well as cleaning the stand (we had to get elevated bowls because she strained her neck bending down to eat). He thinks that if he just feeds her & puts more water in the bowl, that he is doing it. Every night before bed, I have to empty & clean her water bowl because the water in it is disgusting, then sit on the floor to clean all the excess water off the stand because she is a messy drinker & ends up with standing water all in the stand which will breed mold.

There was an agreement to abide by my training rules for her. Since I'm home all the time, I agreed to train her but he spoils her & undoes all my training.

Scoop the backyard poop daily. This actually started happening 3 weeks age after the FOURTH TIME she tracked it inside. And really I think he only started doing it because she got it on my duvet & sheets, which he then had to take to the laundry mat because our washer/dryer can't handle my duvet, just the cover. So because he was extremely inconvenienced by it, he made a change to prevent it.

Take the dog on 2 walks of a significant length daily, one before work & one after, so she gets the proper amount of exercise. This one he actually does. And if he can't, for whatever reason (be it illness or hockey) he hires a walker off of Wag. So that one he is pretty consistent about.

This doesn't even cover that I'm the one who is with her all the time so I do all the play, the brushing, the training, and keep an eye on her behaviors to make sure she's healthy & happy.

So, since he can't manage basic dog care I said, in the most condescending mom voice I could muster, "Now (dad's name), when you can prove that you can consistently care for your current dog properly, we can think about getting another one. But until then, the answer is no." He laughed, but I hope he realizes how absolutely fucking serious I am. I can barely care for myself. I can't take on another dog.

I'm so frustrated. Plus, I'm about to hire someone to roll up in here twice a month to help me with the floors, dusting, & my bathroom.

[brownskinsugarplum76]

Eye of the Storm, Ch 6

This one came tumbling out of my brain pretty quickly... I've really fallen in love with these two together! 😍😍😍 No smut, but we continue the love-fest. I also go into what happened between Robert and Maggie after the one shot Tequila Sunrise. I plan on going into more flashbacks later. (Catch up on the rest of the Eye of the Storm chapters here.)

Thanks as always to @firethatgrewsolow for the read. ❤️❤️❤️

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Maggie and Robert caught Strider gleefully chasing after the birds and barking his excitement. They could tell right away that he meant no harm to the seagulls, he was just excited to find playmates.

Because there was some distance between them and Strider, Robert put two fingers in his mouth and whistled. The dog raced toward his master, as though playing with his feathered friends would never match the connection he had to Robert.

Strider wagged his tail expectantly, and Robert crouched to scratch behind his pet's ears. "Hey, boy! What kind of adventures did you get into with those birds? Hmm? Couldn't wait for me to get some exercise? What am I going to do with you, huh?"

"He's got you wrapped around his paw, hasn't he?" Maggie watched with amusement as her magnetic, masculine boyfriend suddenly became a boyish imp who didn't seem to have the heart to scold his pet.

"He is certainly a big part of my life when I'm at home." He glanced up at Maggie but quickly trained his eyes back on Strider. He resumed ruffling the dog's fur with joy.

"So much so that you brought him across the ocean and a big country to live with you, it seems."

"Exactly. I couldn't go that long without my boy!" He turned back to his pet. "Strider, this is Maggie. You'll be seeing a lot of her for a while. I hope you two can be friends? She's special to me, just like you."

"Hey, Strider! I grew up with a dog in my house, so I am definitely pleased to meet you." She stroked his fur and then scratched behind his ears, just like Robert had.

"Do you like the beach? I do, too! I love to go every chance I can get, and I'm so excited that you and Robert live here! I'd love to walk you out here. What do you say?"

She continued to pet Strider, and he nuzzled against her, glad to have met a new friend.

"He's been cooped up almost all day; that might explain why he escaped. Why don't we all take a walk now?"

"That's a good idea, Robert."

"I'll let you bond with him a little more, while I get his favorite ball."

"Absolutely. I'd love to keep this cutie company." Maggie resumed petting Strider's mottled coat and talking to him. He was content to bask in Maggie's attention.

Maggie couldn't have asked for a better day: seeing Robert again, becoming his special roommate, and knowing it was just the beginning of a couple of blissful weeks with him. It was like she was living inside of a rock and roll fairytale, and she planned to cherish every second.

Strider perked his ears up and wagged his tail, seconds before a ratty tennis ball soared over his head. "All right, doggo, go fetch!" Robert yelled from a distance.

He reached Maggie by the time Strider clamped down on the runaway ball. "I thought you might want this," he said, helping her into her jacket. The wind had whipped up a bit, the waves were reclaiming some of the shoreline, and sunset was on its way.

"Thanks. It is starting to get a little chilly."

Strider returned and dropped the ball at Robert's feet. "Good boy. Nothing ever gets past you! Maybe there's a tryout for you with Wolverhampton in the future, hmm?"

Robert threw Strider's ball once more, and the pet was off again.

"Fancy a walk?" Robert placed a hand on the small of Maggie's back.

"I'd love to."

They stopped and started down the beach, pausing to throw Strider's ball, examine seashells, and kiss.

"This is a lot like that first night…" Robert started.

"But very different in other ways…"

"And not just because we're sober and not horizontal!" Robert chuckled before he got serious. "Maggie, having you here really feels like my life has regained something it was missing after the accident… I'm so glad we ran into each other. I feel more complete, more alive somehow… Does that make sense? I've never felt this way before."

"I completely understand. I felt so at home when we went inside your place, and I feel like Strider and I will be good friends in no time. I don't know, it just…"

"...Feels right." Robert finished her thought, grasped her face, and sent her reeling with a spellbinding kiss.

They smiled at each other while their lips still touched and  kissed some more.

"We've already woken up to a majestic sunset together; how about we watch the sun go down this time?" Robert sat on the sand, back where it was still dry, with his legs spread wide. He motioned for Maggie to join him, and whistled for Strider to take a break with them.

Maggie sat down between Robert's legs, and he wrapped his arms around her. Strider enjoyed the feel of Maggie's hand in his fur.

Maggie was soothed by the smell of Robert's well-worn leather jacket and the sandalwood scent that was always there when he was close. It was a heady scent that was more powerful for her in that moment than the eternal fresh ocean smell that whipped around on the early evening air.

Robert kissed the top of her head and rested his hands on her shoulders. Just like back in 1972, they had the beach to themselves.

Maggie enjoyed the rapidly changing colors of the sky and marveled at how much had changed between them over the past few years. She was certain that her first encounter with Robert, back when she was working at the restaurant and trying to get her band off the ground, would just be a one-night fling. She was prepared to remember it as the most romantic one-night stand ever, with the most captivating man she'd ever met.

She thought that Robert asking for her number the next morning was just a polite way to say goodbye. But when he actually called the next day, and they spoke for hours… It was beyond belief.

He arranged for a car to take her to The Forum the following day, and she watched in the wings after having missed the San Diego show while working. The concert was phenomenal, and her sampling of tour life afterward was more outrageous than she could've imagined. It was a long night of partying and transcendent intimacy with Robert. She slept soundly through the ride back to San Diego, and her dreams were filled with visions of the vivacious blond singer.

It was a lovely beginning for them, and was joined with many more memorable encounters, of lively parties, romance, intelligent conversation, and commiserating on artistry at times. Robert was as much a friend to her as a lover, a friend who had climbed all the peaks and valleys that she was starting to climb, one who was more than willing to give her a boost when needed.

Their history made her that much more willing to experience every happy moment possible with him and work through every bad one that was to come.

"Penny for your thoughts, Mags?" Robert murmured his question in her ear after realizing she had gone silent.

"I'm just thinking about us."

"Good thoughts, I hope?" He heated her inside with delicate kisses along her jawline.

"Only the best." She sighed and noticed that Strider had fallen asleep.

"I've said it before, but you've always been a highlight for me whenever we come out west. You understand quite a bit of my life, having lived along a similar track. You've had every right, on many occasions, to get angry, never take my phone calls again, or send the driver packing, but you're always there for the next trip with a smile. God knows I don't deserve someone like you, with all the Good Time Percy galavanting I've done. Just… Thank you."

Maggie nuzzled against his chest and enjoyed the moment.

"I was an absolute mess here after the accident. If no one had come around to see me, I'd probably be back in that caveman beard that I shaved off a little before I met you, drinking Bovril and screaming at the soccer games on the TV. I had just started getting back on track with my voice… But then my body takes a big hit? And there was no certainty as to whether things would ever be right again? I couldn't handle it. I didn't want to deal with it, just wanted to lay low. And then it became a big, months-long pity party--a pity party with women and stimulants and anything else to chase the blues away. But the blues never left. If I had let you in… If I had sought you out when things went bad… I…"

"It's water under the bridge, Robert. Really. Just don't let it happen again. OK?

It was Maggie's turn to give Robert a searing kiss." Seriously, don't hide out if you're feeling low. I'm here for you."

"I will share your load… Oooh, let me!" Robert belted out some of his ad libbing from Physical Graffiti. The wind carried off the sound, but the meaning was fully captured by Maggie's heart.

"Exactly, shameless front man!" She laughed and sprung to her feet, dusting the sand off her clothes.

"I'm cold now… Race you back to the house?" Without a reply from Robert, she was off, with Strider following along, awake again and ready to play the new game Maggie had started.

"Dammit, woman, not so fast! You know I'm taking it easy!" Robert gingerly jogged the first few yards and, feeling fine, sprinted as best he could in the twilight to close the distance between them.

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The rest of my stories are here, or search for the hashtag #brownskinsugarplumlibrary

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