b3anieperson

[b3anieperson]

I live for those slutty boots and that slutty wai-

I mean what? Who said that? Vex'halia? Not me, definitely.

Worst mistake in TLOVM is not giving Percy his slutty boots and holster from the comics and even now I die on this hill

#Vox Machina #TLOVM #Percy de rolo #percival fredrickstein von musel klossowski de rolo iii #yes i know it's bad #vex'halia #percy x vex

[b3anieperson]

IM FUCKING SORRY. I HAD SENSORY ATTACKS USING THESE DRY MOTHERFUCKERS AND FOR WHAT?

FOR FUCKING WHAT?

[b3anieperson]

When I was younger I thought he said "The Jorgensons do it in nine months." Not at nine months old. My small dyslexic mind had very different thoughts.

add this to the list of times snotlout says something hilarious yet deeply disturbing

[b3anieperson]

I JUST REALIZED IVE BEEN ON THIS FUCKING SOTE FOR TWO YEARS AND NO ONE TOLD ME.

I CANT TRUST YOU FUCKERS NOW I HAVE TO SET CALENDER DATES.

#tumblr #2 year tumblrversary #no one told me??? #???

[b3anieperson]

It was at this moment. He knew.

He fucked up.

thawfest.

[b3anieperson]

Okay, I got broken up with a few weeks ago, I didn't have my phone cause it was broken, but I recently rebooted all of my texts and found this in my group chat.

People in the Chat:

MANLY VIOLIN ENSUES (Luci)

PAY TOLL NOW (Bee)

Keith Licking Chaos Potato (Fizz)

Niffty and Millie's cleaning Boy Toy (Moxxie)

Rei (me)

(I blurred out their actual names which were said in that chat a few times. Their names are in the parentheses above.)

But I just wanted to share this because my friends are awesome, reading this genuinely made me cry, I love them all so much <3.

Fizz gave me a Twix in our last hour together that day, and drove me home after. We talked, and they all helped me so much that day, sitting with me at lunch, and buying me a bunch of snacks.

I don't care what anyone says, friends are family, and I've got a damn good one.

#breakup #me myself and I #friends #text message #shitpost #grateful #they're so sweet #i love them all #friends are the best #friends are family #I know we all have stupid fake names for eachother but tuats just us

[b3anieperson]

Okay so I'm pretty sure we all remember the random fucking cow the paladins got from that mall, Kaltenecker? Did you guys ever wonder how they got that wondrous fucking name?

ITS THE FUCKING LINE PRODUCERS NAME.

BENJAMIN KALTENECKER. THE LINE PRODUCER AND A COW.

WHAT THE FLYING FUCK.

#voltron legendary defender #voltron #paladins of voltron #unilu swap shop #coran coran the gorgeous man #lance mcclain #lance vld #blue lion #takashi shirogane #keith kogane #pidge gunderson #katie holt #hunk vld #allura vld #coran vld #voltron stupid shit #kaltenecker vld

[b3anieperson]

I've been doing a reweatch of Voltron: Legendary Defender.

I believe in his free time, Coran was doing unreasonable amounts of cr*ck c*c*ine in his bedroom before he went to bed, and when he woke up. This man is fucking crazy.

*¹a *²o *³a - vowels ommited.

Coran scares me.

#voltron #voltron remake #coran coran the gorgeous man #coran #vld coran #vld #vld the caslte of lions #someone help #coran took my phone to post this #voltron paladins #zarkon

[b3anieperson]

So we're playing DnD today and I'm the DM. We just started this campaign and our Druid feeds a berry (poisonous death berries) to our fighter. He drops dead. Luckily one of our aids designed by a friend is a necromancer.

*There's a big ass catch though, every time he revives you he takes one of your organs, could be vital could not, you'll find out when you wake up*

So this is essentially how it goes.

Charlie, the necromancer: *cracks knuckles* Fuuuck, here we go again. *Aggressively Shoves leaves in his mouth*

The party: WhAT ArE yOu DoINg!?

Sailor, another aide: I'll get the knife.

Sailor: *Finds where his kidneys would be* *STABS* *pulls out the kidney*

The party: WhaT ThE FuCK

Charlie: *puts kidney in a jar*

Toshi, the fighter who died: *GASPS BACK TO LIFE* I feel, as if, something is missing.

#dnd #dnd character #custom dnd #necromancy #water #death #dungeons and dragons #druid #poisonous berries #gasps in gay #neurodivergent #dungeon master #dungeons and dragons spoofs #spoof #campaign

[b3anieperson]

Mom, I frew up.

encounters

[b3anieperson]

MORE LIKE wikipedia despite them living in the same house, sleeping in the same bed, were the same gender, made out twice for social standards, and never had husbands/wives, they were not homosexuals.

wikipedia Tell me about this man's personal life

[b3anieperson]

Tell me why we all cried when Jayfeather was having mental break down and was like:

Jayfeather: You lied

Rock: You lied To yourself

Jayf: That's too accurate *snaps his fucking neck*

#jayfeather #rock #warriors #fandom #jayf #lionblaze #like he literally almost drowned himself to save this stick and just snapped it #omen of the stars #warriorcats #thunderclan #medicinecats #moonpool #furless rock

[b3anieperson]

Life is a beach

And I'm eating the sand.

Nom nom.

#im a weirdo #what the fuuuuck #stupid quotes #lol moment

[b3anieperson]

It's my 1 year anniversary on Tumblr 🥳

Wow, one year already, I'm glad I downloaded this app on a bad day, just for shits and giggles, and now here I am, still on here for shits and giggles.

#1 year tumblrversary #tumblr milestone

[b3anieperson]

I can confirm that I indeed sit like this.

neurodivergent gay people sit exactly like this

[b3anieperson]

Two metal spirals, same episode, uncontrolled crying.

This scene was emotionally devastating

[b3anieperson]

I ate that shit up like tuffnut eating medicinal willow bark.

in httyd when gobber says “the dragon will always go for the kill” and it shows hiccup at the place where toothless spared him as he goes, “so why didn’t you?”, and later on when hiccup says he should’ve just killed toothless, that it would’ve been better for everyone, astrid asks “the rest of us would’ve done it. so why didn’t you?” and hiccup says that he saw himself in toothless, and that’s why hiccup spared him. so good. incredible. i ate that shit up like a wild rat