Because you will suffer no matter what rank in the world you stand at.
But there are boundaries to suffering and you have to Strive to suffer only upto that limit, that threshold, and that's how you look at life.
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7:18pm, 22 sept 2022
So what happened?
Nothing. Nothing, I, I just wanted to be, and-
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How much more
9:05pm, 21 sept 2022
Is it even longer?
After you die, is it even longer than here?
To wait, for this to end.
Is it even longer?
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Convincing
1:05 am, 8 Sept, 2022
You know people convince themselves.
When they want something, they convince themselves crazy things.
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11:20pm, 25 Aug 2022
All this time, people have mouthed words in me.
The pressure, to say what they want you to say.
They don't want to admit that they want me to say those things, they give their best attempt to make it look like its not them.
But, you can feel it.
Because thats what they want, because thats what they are doing.
(Theres probably another set of noise, leading - It somehow benefits them)
They don't want you to say those things, infact most of the time they don't care what you want to say, what is going on in your mind.
Their entire focus is, for you to say the things they want you to say, and make it look like you are doing this because its what you want.
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We all have this urge, to have all our problems solved.
We all have this urge to have someone else solve our problem.
We all have this urge to have someone else think for us.
We all have this urge to get rid of our responsibility.
(But soon we start disliking this someone else's thoughts, decisions, because we never really thought for ourselves by ourselves, so we -
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I've been running away from my own thoughts lately lol
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Not that I will ever find someone in my locality but still🐐
Tumblr Code.
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So Glad
12:23am, 7 July 2022
I am so glad.
I feel so good, so satisfied, about my controller.
About the prototype.
About MY GAME.
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The Four
6:27pm, 1 July 2022
I feel Incompetent, Miserable, Pathetic, Left out.
And lately, even writing, is making me panic.
Even my own writing is starting to feel like a face off.
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Pathetic
5:30pm, 30 June 2022
I feel pathetic.
(Pathetic - miserably inadequate; of very low standard)
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Ai ni dekiru
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To know
6:55 pm, 24 June 2022
I am sad.
I want someone to know that I am sad.
Perhaps someone beautiful.
Perhaps a girl.
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Accepting
10:44 p.m., 23 June 2022
Sometimes thats all you want.
Someone accepting.
Someone who will say, "Yes Yes, you are right, it's beautiful. Your thoughts and things that you like, love, that belong to you, all beautiful"
10:46 p.m.,23 June 2022
Sometimes
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I
10:06 p.m., 23 June 2022
I feel miserable.
And those eyes, they look at me 24/7 as if I am doing wrong.
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A Love Letter
9:41 p.m., 23 June 2022
I want someone to do for me, what they do, when they see a sad movie.
I want someone to watch me sad.
And then admire me, adore me.
And then tell me, I am here, we will deal with it together.
I am here.
And idk if I will ever leave you, but right now in this moment, I am here.
I will listen to you.
Even if you dont have the courage to-
Even if you are not able to say it with the correct words or in the way you want to say it.
If you are unable to say it, do it, in the way you want to, I will encourage you to do that.
I will encourage you to do it in the way you want to.
The way that will make you feel good or relief.
I will encourage you to do that, when you are unable to do it.
And I will ask you always, is this how you wanted this to happen?
Are you feeling good or relieved that it happened this way?
I will ask you if you are okay.
And I will never look at you with those eyes, the eyes that you are so afraid of.
The eyes, that constantly search for the tiniest of wrong you have done, out of their inability to life.
I swear I will never look at you with those eyes.
Those that make you feel miserable.
I will never let you feel miserable.
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Akuma no ko
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