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Late Night Conversations: What Timezone is Lifeline in, Anyways?

Game: Lifeline

Pairing: Lifeline x Taylor

Warnings: Discussions of blame and guilt, if you squint Lifeline might be having an anxiety attack, lifeline uses swear words but Taylor does not

A/N: Wow this is my first time posting anything in a LONG time and it’s my hyperfixation from like six years ago. New game came out, obsession has returned. Both Taylor and the Lifeline use they/them pronouns in this.

“Hey, are you still there?”

It was late at night and Taylor knew they shouldn’t be bothering their lifeline for no reason, but they couldn’t sleep and were feeling lonely. They had been tossing and turning all night.

Yet, somehow the response was instant, the little words popping up on their screen.

“I’m awake. What’s up? Everything okay?”

Taylor smiled a bit. Their lifeline was a bit of a worrywart who tried to help keep Taylor’s head on their shoulders without causing too much extra stress.

“Everything is fine! I just. Can’t sleep. So I wanted to see if you wanted to chat.”

“With you? Always. What’s up?”

All of the things that had happened recently flew past their mind but Lifeline had been there with them, so it’s not like there was anything new to tell them, and Taylor didn’t have the energy to get into their own emotions.

“We always talk about me. Why don’t we talk about you?”

“Because you’re the astronaut dealing with aliens and general danger and I’m just some person? I think the difference in interest and importance is obvious.”

“I’m sure you’re not just some person! You’re really important to me at the very least. And you’ve saved my life about a dozen different times. Maybe multiple dozen at this point. I don’t know, I stopped keeping count.”

“That’s sweet but really. I’m uninteresting.”

“Well, at least tell me how you’re doing!”

There was a pause in messages.

“In what capacity?”

“Uh… in general?”

What a peculiar question. Taylor sat up in their bed and stared at the words. A couple minutes passed. Did their communicator stop working?

“Hey? You there? Did I lose you?”

“I’m here, sorry. I’m okay.”

Now, Taylor might not have had the best intuition. That was somewhere their Lifeline guided them. But they could tell something was off.

“Talk to me. What’s up?”

“Nothing.”

That reply came almost too quickly.

“Tell me, please? I always tell you everything, I want to know what’s on your mind.”

“No.” A pause. “I don’t want to stress you out.”

“Saying that alone makes me worry.”

“See? I’m already doing it. Let’s not talk about me.”

“You can’t say that and then try to drop the subject. Something is wrong. What’s wrong?”

“Shouldn’t you be focusing on yourself?”

“What. Is. Wrong.” Taylor usually wasn’t this forceful. It almost felt out of place in their own mouth as they said these things but now they really were getting worried. Another amount of time passed with no response.

“You there?” They asked after a few moments. Did they push too hard? Maybe they crossed a line, did they mess up-

“I’m scared.”

Taylor blinked. The words lit up their screen but it took a moment for them to process it.

“Scared? What are you scared of?”

“A lot of things.”

“How about right now specifically?”

Another pause came.

“This.”

“This? What do you mean?”

“I’m afraid of your entire situation. Not just because it’s scary. But because you’re in it. I am so happy to be the person you reached out to, to be helping you, but I’m just a person.”

“I’m not sure I follow?”

“If you get hurt or die it’s my fault and I’m not even physically there to help you or do anything but type into this stupid phone and try not to cry whenever you’re panicking.”

“Hey, wait, no, nobody said anything about anything being your fault-“

“Nobody has to!” The words were popping up with the same speed as when Taylor was distressed and needed help immediately, a similar urgency, but the emotion behind it was incomparable. “It’s true and you can’t deny it and you’re depending on me and I’m scared of failing and I’m scared of losing you!”

“I. Didn’t realize I was putting this much pressure on you.” A guilt crept into the back of their mind. Another moment passed.

“That’s why I didn’t want to fucking TELL YOU!”

“What, so you could suffer in silence?”

“So you didn’t have to worry about it or me or anything not immediately affecting you. You need to be focused on yourself and the people there, like Mari and her baby. The last thing you need is a crying lifeline admitting they’re afraid of killing you.”

“Okay, killing me is a bit strong.”

“Is it? If you die directly because of some of my advice, is that not me killing you?”

“No, it’s not! It’s not even close! You’ve saved my life so many times-“

“You could’ve died if I fucked up.”

“But you didn’t.”

“What if I do?”

Taylor took a moment themselves this time, milling over their own words. Was there really anything they could say? Their lifeline seemed sufficiently distressed. The idea that it could be their fault if Taylor got hurt or died was… insane. It had never even crossed Taylor’s mind. But it was weighing on their lifeline’s mind.

“You’re doing a much better job than I could’ve done myself. If SOMEHOW you did screw up (which you won’t) and I died somehow based off what you told me to do instead of my own stupid decisions (which isn’t gonna happen), then, I’d say, thank you for getting me this far in the first place. I wouldn’t have made it off that rock in the first place if not for you. That was supposed to be my grave, I know it. But you lead me through it. Even when I wanted to give up, you didn’t let me.”

“But…“

“Am I wrong? How many times was I ready to roll over and die?”

“I don’t want to think about how many.”

“Exactly! You’re the reason I made it off that moon and where I am now. If somehow, I were to die because of you, I wouldn’t be upset because I’d already be dead without you.”

There was a long moment before their lifeline replied again.

“I wish I could argue that logic.”

“Besides, I can’t die now, otherwise I’d miss out on my only chance to say ‘I told you so’ when I DON’T die because of your decisions.”

“Ha. Idiot.”

“Hey, I’m doing pretty well for an idiot.”

“Yeah. Yeah, you are.”

“Not to back track too far, but I recall there being another fear, fear of losing me? What’s that supposed to mean?”

“I mean… I feel like it’s pretty obvious. I’m afraid of losing you.”

“You’re afraid of me dying?”

“Yes.” A pause. “Or you getting stranded, or greened, or hurt in general, or going without food or rest… You know. Losing you.”

“Why? That doesn’t seem like something you need to be afraid of. Worried, maybe, but scared?”

“Taylor.”

“What?”

“….god, you are stupid.”

“What???”

“I care about you, Taylor. A lot. More than I probably should. I’m not here just to help, I’m here to help YOU, Taylor. Not that I wouldn’t help someone else but you…” A delay in replies. “…you’re special.”

“How do you figure?”

“Well, you’re ridiculously smart, stupidly heroic, idiotically brave.”

“Aren’t these supposed to be compliments???”

“Shhh I’m not done yet.”

“Fine, fine.”

“You’re persistent. Yeah, you wanted to give up a few times and needed some encouragement but in the end you have never given up. You could’ve ignored me if you wanted. But you never do. You always keep going, no matter how panicked and scared you are and how horrifying and bleak things look.”

“That doesn’t sound like a great thing.”

“It is. It’s amazing. You’re amazing, Taylor. I’ve never met anyone else like you. We may not have met or even heard each other’s voices, but you’re special to me. Even more than just special.”

“More than special? What’s that supposed to mean?”

Another pause.

“I can’t spell everything out for you, Taylor. Puzzle that one out for yourself.”

“What? C’mon. Explain it, please?”

“You should try to sleep. And so should I. My communicator is on in case you try to contact me, if you need me. I’m always here.”

“You’re really just going to leave me hanging on this one?”

“Yeah. Now go to sleep.”

Taylor sighed and switched off their communicator, rolling over in bed again. Thoughts of their lifeline filled their head, taking all the little pieces they knew about Lifeline and patching them together, trying to guess a face, a voice, a person to them. Eventually they gave up on this as they fell asleep, but sleep of dreams starring lifeline were good ones.

It didn’t take too long for Taylor to connect the dots. Another night when they were having trouble sleeping. They were considering messaging Lifeline again, but didn’t want to wake them. Taylor’s mind went back to their last late night conversation. And then it clicked. And then Taylor turned on their communicator.

“More than just special,” they muttered into the mic. “More than special.”

“Good morning to you, too, Taylor.” Their sass was evident in their words - Taylor HAD just woken them up in the middle of the night.

“You said more than special, right?”

“I did in fact say that, yes. Why?“

“Are you-“ Taylor swallowed nervously. “Did you mean you’re in love with me?”

There was a momentary pause.

“Yeah.”

Taylor stared at the word on their screen with a gaping mouth.

“Taylor?” They said after Taylor didn’t reply. “Did I fuck up?”

“uhhwooooh.”

Now it was Lifeline’s turn to stare at the screen.

“What was that?”

“Speech to text trying to translate the dumb noises I’m making.”

Not that lifeline could see it, but Taylor’s face was burning red, all the way up to the tips of their ears. Love? Love??? Their lifeline loved them?

“Uh, if this is too weird or awkward, we can forget I said anything.”

“NO!” Followed immediately by an “OW!”

“Taylor?? Are you okay?”

“I’m fine! I just. Sat up too quickly and hit my head. That’s not the point! I don’t want to pretend like you didn’t just say that.”

“Are you sure, because I wouldn’t be upset if you did.”

“I’ve never been more sure of anything in my life.”

“Alright. What about what I said, then?”

“Look. I don’t know a lot about love. Just whatever I learned from romcoms like-“

“If you make a shitty obscure pop culture reference that goes over my head right now…”

“Okay, SKIPPING that, the point still stands, I don’t know anything about love.”

“Is there a ‘but’ here or am I getting rejected hardcore?”

“BUT!” Taylor announced loudly into his gauntlet. “I do get excited whenever I see a message from you. And get all blushy when you compliment me or blindside me with your care and support. And I always find myself trying to imagine what you look like or sound like when I’m trying to calm down. And hearing you say you’re in love with me has my heart beating a mile a minute. That’s. I THINK that’s the same thing. Maybe?”

“I mean, it hits most of the boxes my feelings about you check off, but that’s your call, I guess? This is one decision I can’t make for you, Taylor.”

“I know. But this decision I don’t need your help with. Just give me a moment.”

“Take all the time you need.”

Taylor had stood up and was pacing for quite a while now, butterflies dancing in their stomach and their heart beating like a drum. They took a moment to catch their breath before speaking again.

“I’m in love with you, too.”

“<3”

“I appreciate that but I’m not sure I can send heart emojis back. Less than three. Did it work?”

“It did not.”

“Damn.”

“Ha, dummy.”

“You’re in love with this dummy, so who is dumb now?”

“Is that going to be your new comeback for whenever I playfully insult you?”

“Yes, probably. Why? Am I wrong?”

“You’ve come up with an argument I can’t beat by admitting you’re stupid. Bravo.”

“Thank you. But. What do we do about this, anyways?”

“I’m not sure we do anything different, except I wait a bit more eagerly for you to come back to earth and cross my fingers that it’s my earth.”

“I guess I get to do the same thing, then? And I have ANOTHER thing calling me home, now.”

“Well. You better get here as soon as possible.”

“Trust me, I’m working on it!”

“<3”

“Yeah, yeah, less than three to you, too.”

Despite the sass in their tone, there was a giddiness that Taylor had as they flopped into bed and wished their lifeline goodnight. Taylor found it difficult to sleep that night, but this time, for good reason. Hope instead of fear kept them awake. They could deal with a bit of tiredness for that.

#cey writes #lifeline game #lifeline #cadet taylor #lifeline taylor #what are the tags for this anyways #where is this in taylor’s timeline? who fucking knows. it’s sure there.#same with the assumption they’ve got the same earth or universe or dimension #look its cute ok #don’t throw semantics into it #amazing writing!!!#got Taylor’s dialogue ON POINT ACCURATE #the banter is so cute

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