#“what the FUCK rhymes with stolen”

[kianri-ah]

wilmon saint valentines fic ‼️‼️

#swedish prince wilhelm sends his crush slash best friend anonymous letters #tries to be sneaky about it too #<- failing miserably #inspired by henry he tries to write a poem maybe #on a call with erik talking about whatever and mid conversation he groans and says exasperated #“what the FUCK rhymes with stolen” #erik lives sorry he is important to me #wille also asks felice for help #(bestie agenda real) #wilhelm being dumb gay in love personified mostly #only fluff i need to see them happy 👍👍 #young royals #wilmon #wilhelm #simon #kian writes ‼️ #i should not be trusted with words

[bao3bei4]

why zines? how zines?

i was on a panel at fanworks con 2023 about zines today. it was a lot of fun! i decided to turn my portion of the talk into a post for my friends who couldn’t make it to the panel. 

this post includes my thoughts on: 

why make a zine

how to generate ideas for zines

how to finish your zines

how to build an audience for your zines

so why zines? what are they? [ZEENS, rhymes with beans], pronounced that way because it’s a shortened form of the word magazine, are basically just that: self published magazines. but why make a zine over, say, a blog post? or any other piece of art. 

i have basically three reasons. the first is that making little books is cool. it’s genuinely awesome to make physical zines and have the product of your labor in your hand. it’s a great feeling to finish a project and feel a concrete reward, and a lot of times we don’t get that in our lives.

the second reason is that zines give you absolute editorial control. you can put anything you want on a page. whatever layout, whatever order, whatever fold, whatever content. you name it, you can do it. this is something other venues rarely give you. for artists, it’s phenomenal. and for the rest of us, it gives us the ability to become artists for a little bit, as we lay things out.

the third reason is that zines can be absolute shit. in fact, the more shit they are, the more diy and punk they are. they have an incredible lineage of stolen copy paper and anarchist politics. all that to say, is that there are no standards. the zine ethos is say what you wanna say. it’s tremendously freeing to go fuck polish and respectability, i’m making my project.

because of these three reasons, i want to encourage you to get started making zines by describing common challenges and worries and giving you several practical tips for each on working past them. so, in order, they’re “i don’t know what to make a zine about,” “i struggle to finish projects,” and “no one will read my zines.” let’s get into it.

first up, “i don’t know what to make a zine about.” i think this one is pretty common, even for experienced zine creators. sometimes you’re in the mood to make things but you have no clue what. a lot of people suggest to just go with random words or whatever pops into your head, but i’m picky! i find that unsatisfying! so here are some tips for people in the same boat. 

ONE: what’s distracting you? work with it. because anything can be a zine, let the things you’ve already done serve as inspiration. photos you’ve taken can be formatted into a zine. is there a game sucking up your attention? make a zine about it. the song stuck in your head can turn into a lyricbook, forgotten works in progress or sketches can be resurrected, cannibalized, or even published as incomplete zines. if you’ve been busy with real life, maybe the recipes you’ve been making—even if, especially if, they’re struggle meals, can turn into zines. interview your most interesting friend. summarize a book you read recently. even if you’ve just been doomscrolling, that’s a zine too! i got a zine last weekend called bay area newsreel which was collecting recent articles about local news from leftist perspectives gathered up into a handy volume. your attention is a gift, so look at what zine fodder it’s accumulated for you naturally. 

SECOND: add a twist. sometimes i have an idea but it isn’t quite right. it just seems too straightforward. so i try to develop along a single axis of content or form. what this means is basically go against your instincts, or rather, your first impulse. that first idea is very hard to walk away from, but doing so often gives you an idea that gets you unstuck. so for content, add a different perspective. for me this is often a theoretical approach. when i was stuck on my scum villain zine, turning it into freud zine let the words start flowing. next, on form: present it differently than your first instinct is to. if my first thought is “essay,” i try to figure out how to chunk out the information into modules or how to add interactivity or what kind of illustrations to add. if my first thought is “this could be a fic or comic,” i try turning it into an essay. saying things a different way often gives you a new perspective on the content as well. 

THIRD: copy! make your take on the same thing as someone else. it’s not stealing—well, ideally it isn’t. make your original take and give credit where credit is due and ask permission if necessary. but engage with the medium!!! making zines without reading zines is the same thing as trying to write a paper without citing sources, or a novel without reading your contemporaries. that is, you can do it, but it’s hard. zines are a genre into themselves so figure out how to situate yourself in their ongoing dialogue. an example of this from my own practice is that i own a zine about queer gods and mythological creatures from chinese history. reading it i was like. why don’t they talk about this. why don’t they talk about that. and that became the basis for my own zine, guaitai the strange and the queer which focused on queer chinese history and literature instead. different zine, same inspiration. 

all of my ideas suppose you have SOMETHING going on. what if you truly have nothing. my advice? adapted from my “how to write an essay” blog post, is to read a book. read an article. read something. and then post about it. and then turn your posts into a zine. don’t start entirely from scratch — give yourself a scaffolding. so first. read something and tell someone about it. i wasn’t lying about calling myself a consummate poster. it’s a big part of my thought process. 

second up, what if “i struggle to finish projects.” i’m no stranger to having a bunch of half finished half started projects lying around. but here are some zine-specific tips i have for addressing that.

FIRST! go smaller; go shittier. reduce the scope of your projects. make one pagers, lists. once when i was feeling stymied, i made a physical zine about movies i’d watched that month, just listing them with a couple bullet points on each film. i eventually turned it into a bigger digital zine where i listed movies i’d watched over the past several months with more thoughts on them, and nicely formatted. but that was something that came out of reducing my scope from “i need to write a manifesto on a movie i’ve watched recently” to “well i can just tell people about it” to “i can say two things about it.” and something actually got finished.

SECOND. your friends are a great tool for accountability. something i like to do is zine jams with my friends. nothing fancy, it’s just we’ll sit down for an hour and go we’re going to make something in this hour. or, for a bigger scope, we might work separately but commit to making a zine that weekend. it’s nice to have community and it’s nice to feel a little bit of a friendly deadline. i recommend this even if you DON’T have problems finishing zines. it’s a good time. 

THIRD. a lot of times if the words aren’t coming easily, it’s because i’m not trying to say the right thing. keep in mind that your zines don’t have to be “content.” this little paper zine i made about movies wasn’t made to share online; in fact, it’s not available online. i didn’t make it according to what other people would see or be interested in. you can and will burn out on making “marketable” content. corollary to this: sometimes what i have to say is something i DON’T want to share online. it might not be that it’s boring, it might be that it’s too personal. and i share a lot online, i write personal essays after all. but some projects i stall on because they’re really just for me, and i’m again, focused on making content. so this piece of advice is about rejecting the tyranny of the imaginary audience. 

and the next challenge is about embracing that audience! what if no one reads your zines, something that’s entirely possible. well there’s plenty you can do about that.

FIRST. cultivate zine community. read other people’s zines! talk to them about their zines! this greatly increases the chance that they will do the same for you. don’t go in expecting reciprocity; do it for its own sake, but it’s a great place to start. try asking people at zine fests if they’d be willing to trade with you, for instance. 

SECOND. write for yourself. it’s cheesy but it’s true. you really have to. if you’re not proud and happy with what you’re making on its own merits, what’s the point. now because this is a cop out tip, i’m not counting it as a tip on its own. 

so SECOND PART TWO. make your zines more accessible. if they’re not free, make them free—yes, you deserve to be compensated for your work, but it’s up to you to decide if you want a bigger audience first. if your zines aren’t short, make them shorter. make them short enough that you can post their entirety on social media or something else easy for your audience to consume. it’s a big ask sometimes to get someone to download your pdf! if they’re physical, hand them out to people you meet. remove all the barriers to entry.

THIRD. related to this, change medium. if you’re not making physical zines, try printing them out. if you’re not making digital zines, try digitizing them. both of these offer access to new audiences and new people who might be more interested in one form than another. 

i hope these thoughts encourage you to make a zine! if you do, please let me see it. i love reading zines. 

#x

[soapskneebrace]

Fun stuff about Fallout: New Vegas for the uninitiated:

There’s one romance option! His name is Fisto. Please assume the position :)

Having your brain removed from your skull is not only survivable, it’s actually, in some cases, better for you.

You can even have a conversation with your own brain! No matter your gender it has a male Bostonian accent and is FURIOUS at you for the multiple severe head wounds you’ve inflicted upon it.

Speaking of head wounds, I lied, there’s actually two romance options. The other character you can sleep with, voiced by Chandler Bing, is the one that shot you in the head at the start of the game. He likes feet stuff, and will leave you the morning after :(

Think Cooper is the first cowboy ghoul Dom in fallout? Think again!

In order to get into New Vegas proper, you have the option to solve a scooby-do mystery for a gang of Elvis impersonators.

You cannot join the gang :(

The boss of this gang has a cyborg dog named Rex. Rex despises rats—and also hats, possibly because it rhymes with rats.

In New Vegas, a robot escort will pay you one thousand dollars for each snow globe you find and bring to her. She calls you sugar. You can compliment her hair.

Everyone wants to fuck the mummy man, don’t worry, you’re normal.

Remember those edits with Danaerys Targaryen and the quote “I survived because the fire inside me burned brighter than the fire around me”? Straight up stolen from this game. Specifically, from the mummy man, who is in fact talking about how his Mormonism kept him from dying when he was set on fire by a Julius Caesar impersonator.

There is a town called Novac that settled in the ruins of a motel. Novac has a gift shop built into a giant statue of a toy dinosaur. At the top of the toy dinosaur you can help a war criminal get revenge for the death of his wife. Then he becomes your bestie :)

One available companion is a floating radio robot named ED-E. He can’t speak but if your intelligence score is high enough you can understand him anyway. He beeps. Exclusively.

Sorry. I lied again. There’s three romance options. The third is a woman who runs big game death matches in the sewers. You win her heart by stealing eggs from wild animals for her breeding program.

You can buy the most powerful weapon in the game from a child playing tag in the slums with what he thinks is a toy gun. It’s the detonator for an orbital nuke.

Don’t know Liam O’Brien’s voice? You will!

In the end, the real villain is capitalism, and you are fully able—ENABLED—to choose anarchy.

#fallout

[shugar0cone]

“Risk”

I was one of the most influential overloards, music. I controlled all of it especially when Lilith left. I was strong but the work that came with it was lame, I hated when people used my songs without my permission.

I started to fall sleep at the Vs table. Val needed songs for his special shows, vel needed more songs on social media to bring in more, and vox just needed things for background music. “So what do you say.” Vox says and turned to me. I snored in response. I woke up. “Sure just here.” You signed the papers. You went to walk out until velvet grabbed me and took a picture with me.

I went to the hotel tired, I went to a total 6 places for copy-write and then i still had a song to be made. I took off my shoes, nifty cleaned the place enough so you could take them off but not clean enough to take off my socks. “Ugh!” I yelled and clenched my hair. “Man I wanna quit doing this.” I say. I hear static. The room felt more heavy and dark. “What’s wrong my dear.” He put a hand down on my shoulder and looked at me. “Overloard crap, I don’t have time to enjoy my power instead I’m doing meeting then I’m doing shit at this fucking hotel!” I kicked a pole and it shifted. “Shit.” I grabbed it. “Alastor it’s been so long that I can’t remeber how strong I am.” I pinched my nose confused and conflicted with my self, “I want to help myself but I also want to help Charlie. I’m doing both and it’s not working.” I sat on the couch. I felt a pair of hands grasping my shoulders and rubbing them. “Now, dear you just need to do you, besides you don’t believe in this redemption crap.” I thought for abit. “I don’t but maybe if I take the risk it could work.” I held my hands together. “Alastor, if people didn’t try we would be somewhere else these days.” I say. Alastor looked down at me. “Think about it if somone didn’t risk the idea of radio you wouldn’t be you, if god risked falling his favorite son where would we go.” I sighed. “You’re right my love but…” he paused the smile never faded. “But if those risk takers where wrong think about the humiliation oh and the pain.” He laughed. I looked down sadden. “I’m quitting…” tear plucked my eyes. I loved my job I loved music, but at the same time every tune and every rhyme was mine when it should be shared. “Music should be given to people not stolen.” I thought. This is my risk maybe if I risked being weak and risked being vulnerable then maybe others could enjoy the symphony I took. “Yep I’m done.” With that I got up and left the hotel.

A week has passed since I quit. Charlie hugged me. “THATS A REDEEMING QUALITY YOU WHERE SELFLESS AND SHARED MUSIC AGAIN.” I smiled. “Hey I kept some of it.” I said holding up some sheets of music. “Besides it’s a way to express one’s self.” I looked at Alastor who had a grin on his face. “And it’s the risk I took.” I smiled at him. Thinking ‘and you should too.’

AN: not my best but honestly go board and just wrote, I do like the idea of a music overloard and definitely did not re use this idea for y/n instead of my oc…heh… anyways hopped y’all enjoyed my loves!

P.s: droop stuff in my inbox I love hearing yall suggestions!

-Shugar

#alastor #hazbin hotel #alastor x reader #hazbin x reader #charlie morningstar #angel dust #vaggie #fanfic #hazbin hotel husk

[bee-bzz]

some Brazilian songs that represent some ppg couples because I think you guys are missing out on Brazilian music and I'd like to share.

(this is gonna be a long post so buckle up)

Blossick

"They tell me: the world is in your hands

I guess I let it go then

no, of course I don't love you

but in trying to forget you I'm already remembering us

and if I remember, don't answer me

I swear I don't love you, I just had too much to drink" - Não Te Amo (don't love you), Jão

"I won't talk about love, no

because I don't like anyone

if one day I did, what a shame

(...)

and I won't talk about your eyes

it makes me say the things that I'm afraid to

because they show me what I didn't want to see

and I won't even mention your mouth

I won't say I love you

after spending so long trying to hide it

and I don't even know what I'm talking about

every time I open up I give you an opening to fuck me up" - NÃO VOU FALAR DE AMOR (won't talk about love), Lagum

"Why did you never love me?

why did you hurt me

pretended, lied, never loved me

I wish I could tell you that I

never felt anything for you

I wish that I could uncry

the tears that already ran

and if it already ran (it'll dry)

and if it already dried (no one saw)

I will send it there, to the bridge that fell

this letter that doesn't say" Carta Que Nao Diz (letter that doesn't say), Mariana Froes, Rodrigo Alarcon, Ana Muller

Butchercup

"I like being immature with you

I like to give myself and get lost

I want to be able to nag you on your every manner

smoking anything, just to entertain myself

I risk my life just to see you

all of our youth runs through our veins

it's just, I'm weak, fragile and stupid

to talk about love

but if it's with you, I'll do it" Imaturo (immature), Jão

"The first time I saw you

something told me

"this is gonna end badly"

on the second time, I had the same impression

but I'm not one to listen

to my intuition

it's like something between chaos and stress

but that kind off messes me up

in a good way

baby, don't make me crazy

because I already am

it's just, there really should be a test

anything, a simulation perhaps

to avoid getting into a trap

instead of a relationship

you tell me you hate my outfit

and I really love your dress

when I have the chance to take it off

you tell me that you love me

and I hate you

in a strange way

because nothing is weirder than loving" - EU TE AMO (I Love You), Lagum

"Tell me you hate me

but say you don't live without me

I'm a plague

miss "no shame" from your garden

you're jealous

but you love to watch me dance" - Bem-Me-Quer (He Loves Me, like from the "he loves me, he loves me not" thing), Rita Lee

Boomubbles

"I made these blues for Bia

but Bia won't come and hear

I won't censor the beauty

it's in her nature

living loose around here

I composed sweet melodies

so she would be moved by them

I rhymed with melancholy

my day-to-day without Bia

but Bia doesn't care" - Blues Pra Bia (Blues for Bia) , Chico Buarque (he's like a father to me)

Note: translating this man's songs is almost sacrilegious. Please go listen yourself to at least feel the vibe a little bit. He's a master of lyricism.

"Whoever sees you walking past me like this

doesn't know what suffering is

having to see you in this way

always so pretty

contemplate the sun of your eyes

losing you in thin air

in the certainty of a love

thinking of myself as nothing

because without your kindness

I feel so alone

I drown myself in loneliness" Anna Júlia, Los Hermanos

"Love of my life

from here until eternity

our destinies were traced since maternity

cruel passion, unbridled

I bring you a thousand stolen roses

so you can forgive all of my lies

and all of my blunders

exaggerated, thrown at your feet

I really am exaggerated

I adore a crafted love" - Exagerado (exaggerated), Cazuza

#Spotify #ppg #powerpuff girls #rowdyruff boys #ppg blossom #ppg brick #ppg boomer #ppg butch #ppg buttercup #ppg bubbles #blossick #butchercup #boomubbles #ppg reds #ppg greens #ppg blues #Brazil #Brazilian music #chico buarque #los hermanos #rita lee #lagum #Jão #cazuza #mariana froes #rodrigo alarcon #ana muller

[sewer-freak]

[This is a roleplay blog for a DOL character created by @macabrecravings.]

General Degrees of Lewdity Warnings apply (Under 18 DNI, rape/noncon/dubcon) As well as heavy warnings for psuedo-incest fuckery (Morgan), bullying, medical malpractice, delusions/derealization, TBA… (Ask to tag more!!)

Reminder: Evangeline is intentionally transgressive & I do not hold the same values, views, or kinks that she does. ^_^

#oc: evangeline || pinterest board || spotify playlist

General Info:

• Unsocial Moth.

• Generally makes people uneasy. She’s visibly disturbed & clearly unstable which makes people uncomfortable.

• It doesn’t help that she’s an avid thief & people don’t like having their things stolen.

• Has poor hygiene due to her mental state, which is only made worse considering the places she hangs out (She… reeks. </3)

• Her teachers aren’t too fond of her. She’s not a delinquent by any means, but she spends more time daydreaming than anything.

• She also… stares. at them. Has a thing for older men / authority figures and it’s. obvious.

• Meek & submissive as fuck </3

• Works at the office building as a temp, but occasionally does housekeeping jobs around town

• Spends her free time in the forest, moor, smuggler’s cave, the sewers. When it comes to the orphanage, it’s all or nothing. She’s either locked herself in her room or avoids it like the plague.

• Has substance abuse issues. Cigarettes, alcohol, stimulants, aphrodisiacs…… <- Big fan. You can find her stealing stimulants & aphrodisiacs all over town, (even if the punishment she gets for doing so isn’t often worth the high).

• Very Much a Recluse. Doesn’t go out of her way to interact with people. Still, heres how she feels about certain NPCS:

• MORGAN — Met Morgan while artifact hunting for Winter, and it. fucked her up. She originally went along with him out of fear, but took to him quickly. He’s the father figure she’s never had. The only one who “understands her”.

Her name rhymes with Charlene, and she bares a resemblance to him (gingers. that’s it.), but it’s enough for her to delude herself into thinking that she hypothetically could be Charlene. (She’s not. & In a more lucid state she would accept that, but. Alas.)

• HARPER — Used to avoid their therapy appts at any cost. Morgan got in her head about him, so she was resilient & slow to warm up. But, deep into treatment at her first asylum visit, she became enthusiastic.

**Looked forward to bathing every day** (because it meant he would touch her and get her off). Liked the way his medicine made her feel, and loved his attention even more.

• KYLAR — A genuine friend. One of the only people she likes being around. Prefers when he’s silent and not overbearing. Keeps him at an arms distance because he’s a little… too into her.

He’s made it very clear that he wants to be more than friends/friends with benefits, but she ignores his feelings. She doesn’t want to date him. She doesn’t want him to “fix her” or “keep her safe”.

• WHITNEY — Evangeline is easy to throw around & take advantage of. She does what Whitney asks of her, little to no resistance.

Not close enough to him to drink at the pub with him & his buddies, but would if he allowed her to. Same with smoking with him. Hypothetically, they could get along. But they don’t.

• MICKEY — Fond of from a distance (They help cover up her tracks and are mysterious. It’s..: appealing :))

• ROBIN & SYDNEY — Not close. Doesn’t interact with them other than what’s necessary.

• WINTER — She helps out with the museum & also wants him carnally. Who cares if he’s a “fossil” or “as old as those antiques he collects”? Not her.

• SIRRIS — Another object of her lust. A seemingly perfect father to Sydney, not to mention hot. She’d do anything to be a demonstration on his home videos, if you catch my drift!

• LEIGHTON — To be determined

#introduction. #last edited: feb 3. 2024

[sansloii]

HOW WOULD YOUR OCS BE MISINTERPRETED BY FANDOM ( stolen from @arcxnumvitae )

Mikah

Exaggerate all their personality traits--especially the Anger. Goes from pillow princess that does no wrong to someone that will punch holes in the wall in the "this is never sexy at all what is wrong with you" sorta way.

Also apparently gaslights their romantic partners. A lot. Because they can be manipulative with targets and people they are actively stealing from. No I will not show proof of that because google is free :)

Penny

Angry Latina that has absolutely zero nuance and is hyper aggressive when Mikah and Evan so much as breathe. so she hates them.

Hates men in general, honestly, because she's a lesbian and cannot be friends with them. Every time she makes a face that is not 100% happy around them is zoom and enhanced because they want to prove that she's a man-hating woman.

Wynn

The way they would disrespect this sweet man hurts my spirit because these people would:

Make him stupid despite multiple instances of Wynn navigating difficult personal conversations and making complex choices. This includes the whole babying thing that would make my skin crawl.

he is quiet so therefore he doesn't speak. No like he's mute. Cannot communicate at all. this also means he's slow for some reason

Also make him hypersexual with no fucking rhyme or reason. They see "he can be rough" and that's it. Off to the races. they would completely butcher him and explain it with "instinct"

Evan

Pussy/Bussy being the therapy he needs he needs to stay in a relationship because of the VERY FEW relationships he's in that started with sex. Like legitimately saying, with their whole chest, that he'll immediately become Better and ignore, the disagreements, and the ghosting, and the lack of accountability, and the shit explanations for his behavior--

also turns him into a raging drunk or something (because of his dependency on alcohol)... like specifically that. and make him super sleazy and incapable of taking no as an answer.

Dakota

Also hates men

people would 100% ship her with Joseph despite Joseph being married. And then turn around and misunderstand their familial relationship, ship them HARDER, and then start drama which results in calling her a homewrecker.

they would draw this woman with MASSIVE tits. And if you correct them, you're an awful human being for erasing her big boobs. even though she doesn't? have size triple-E knockers???? but you're wrong for that.

did i mention she hates men? because she does.

Joey

no personality traits outside of "Lera is my soulmate". You'd think Lera literally has his hand up Joey's ass with the way people describe his behavior

Or! Dakota has her hand up his ass. Like Lera and Koko take turns

they would not know what to do with his trauma. and that scares me so i will not think about it.

Roderick

He's a biker so of course he's a misogynist and sexist :) his DEAD wife was the exception :) no I will not provide proof of that because google is free and i am never wrong

that's it. that's the take.

Andris

uwu he's misunderstood. Of COURSE charming and manipulating your partners is bad but. He's hot. So if they don't forgive him for it, it's their fault and we should shit all over those characters.

on the flipside: he's the literal devil in human skin and super predatory. he is just waiting to assault someone.

very polarizing. People either love him or will tell you you're going to hell for liking him. and the next day, you have a callout written about you because you like him so therefore, you're okay with and condone everything he does. It doesn't matter if you understand he's an awful person and can objectively look at him--you're a piece of shit.

#⚜ ┊ ( dashboard fun. ) #⚜ ┊ ( quizzes and memes. ) #.this was so fucking fun i loved this #.thanks for the idea kris #.I feel like a lot of them are extremes but #.that would be it #.no critical thinking about it

[slightlyrebelliouswriter23]

Thoughts on Oak after reading the stolen heir?

DISCLAIMER: not everyone is going to like this and probably even less will agree, so keep in mind that this is just my opinion because you asked for it and i'm willing to give it. please take whatever measures you need to protect yourself and not start discourse about my opinion on my post.

i spoke about my thoughts on Oak a little in this post, but i'll go into more depth here.

i felt as if many of Oak's characteristics were plucked from his family and stitched to him without rhyme or reason.

like. do i find the fact that Oak trips and accidentally murders 11 people fucking hilarious? absolutely. no question. do i think this skill is at all supported by his personality, present actions, or what we are given of his background? absolutely not.

i think it makes sense that he would be schooled on how to use a sword, given Jude and Madoc's skills. i don't think it makes sense that neither of them would give him the time in their day to teach him less aggressive forms of defence (i mean really, what else is Madoc doing in exile that he can't teach his only son basic defence and de-escalation tactics when he clearly did so for Jude whilst in the middle of planning a coup d'état?), nor does it make sense that Oak would not request this of them if they didn't offer.

the Death Mode Activated aspect of his character was sort of just dropped on our heads like an anvil in a Road Runner episode. it left me going ??¿?¿¿ 😵‍💫 ?¿¿??¿ and it felt more like a plot device, or a way to make him stand out from the likes of Cardan (king of witticisms and being down bad for scary women), than something that would actually suit him.

and i expect this might be intentional, but to me, Holly made Oak extremely unrelatable. he's "devastatingly beautiful" (to apparently everyone else– the hooves are not an issue for me, but personally i could never get down with the blond hair thing), charming in a smarmy sort of way, an alleged lovetalker (or whatever it's called, i don't remember), an immortal prince (and soon-to-be king) of Faerie, and he's really really good at killing people.

already, there's too much going on there for my tastes.

but then you add in the fact that he doesn't want the throne for no reason other than he doesn't like the politicking involved, and yet he physically inserts himself between danger and other royals? intentionally?? sorry but you're already balls deep in court politics there, my guy.

in the end, i found i didn't have much sympathy for Oak, because when Suren dropped the bomb and bridled his ass, i was cheering her on. it was the best damn thing she did in the whole entire book. i was delighted, even, that she now has the opportunity to humble him in a way he's never been humbled before.

i genuinely hope most of my feelings regarding him change in the next book. i am rooting for this trajectory for him, because it's not as if i want to cavort in his misery. i just do (for now).

–Em 🖤🗡️

thoughts on Suren

more theories and analysis

#the stolen heir critical #like i can't explain succinctly why i was not really a fan #i just wasn't #he lacked the depth of Cardan while not being different enough in tone for me to separate Oak from him #the stolen heir #the stolen heir spoilers #suroak #oakren #holly black #suren #oak greenbriar #asked and answered #nonnie

[spinningbuster98]

Castlevania Symphony of the Night Part 5: eltsaC detrevnI ehT

And here we are in the half of the game that makes it pretty obvious that this game was subjected to some crunch later in development

Yeah the idea of just having you explore the castle again only this time it’s upside down and with tougher enemies is just inherently kinda lazy and reeks of wanting to extend play time at all costs

I used to hate the Inverted Castle, mostly due to the enemy placement. Most areas are fine enough, but the Clock Tower, the Caverns and the fucking Alchemy Lab just spam enemies relentlessly without rhyme or reason, and since Sotn has a similar issue with knockback and invincibility frames as Rondo you’re gonna find yourself being more frustrated here than anything else. Then you combine the upside down level design being inherently more awkward to traverse and you have an experience that in many ways could be considered subpar

Over time however I’ve started to view this place in a more positive light

For starters the atmosphere is deliciously oppressive and dark. Yeah sure having Finale Toccata as the ost for 70% of the areas was not the best choice, but the actual track is great once it truly gets going and in general the Inverted Castle really does give off more dangerous, even abstratc vibes, also thanks to the overall darker color pallette

The fact that you have complete freedom in how you wanna approach it is also quite nice, as it means that you’ll be able to do things like gunning for the strongest weapons as soon as possible, or just go for the 5 bosses that hold the pieces of Dracula while skipping everything else just to get going if you don’t feel like it 

And while I wouldn’t call this difficulty spike well executed (or even long lasting) it at least finally forces the player to tackle the game in a more strategic way rather than just power through. It’s usually a good idea here to stand back and use spells to take out enemies, which isn’t the easiest thing to do given how irritating some of their button combinations can get, but it’s satisfying to clear a room full of tough enemies with a well placed Soul Steal or Tetra Spirits 

The worst enemy in the game by far to me are the Blue Roses. Unless you have Holy Water (which you should as it’s beyond broken in this game, like in Castlevania 1), these bitches take a while to kill and they just spam their hard hitting attacks relentlessly, not giving you a second to properly attack them. Luckily they’re only really present in the Caverns (and 1 room in the Entrance), but jeez!

Unfortunately getting 200% map completion for the best ending is a real pain here due to the inverted level design, especially in the Caverns where you have no choice but to use the wolf’s swimming ability to “poke” specific spots that won’t register on the map otherwise for some baffling reason

I have one question though: what is this place? Was it conjured up by Shaft’s magic somehow? Then why are the monsters who posses Dracula’s remains here? And also Alucard’s stolen equipment? Say what you will about HoD’s twin castles but at least that game gave a nice explanation as to their existence. Alucard? Mister “this Castle is a creature of Chaos”? Wanna explain things a bit?

#youtube #akumajou dracula #castlevania symphony of the night #my gameplay

[nemesis-is-my-middle-name]

You mentioning timeloops got me thinking of the idea some people have had about the mc looping back whenever they die in a noble fight, but expanding it to be: everytime the mc dies, they loop back, but so does the other time traveler, Ingo. Who has no idea what's happening or why. Just think about all the times a person can die in their first run of the game! It'd be disorienting to be involved in any kind of time travel shenanigans, but to be along for someone else's ride, without there seeming to be any rhyme or reason to why you're skipping back would be so scary. Especially if no one else seemed to notice the changes and you already had an untrustworthy memory.

Or alternate idea: everytime Ingo dies he loops back to the start of the day, but whenever he does Emmet does too. Pretty sure Emmet could figure out it has something to do with Ingo, but it'd be a scary mystery as to why. He was already worried about Ingo the entire time he was missing, but when he started periodically looping back it got even worse. Could also be combined with some sort of wound or phantom pain transfer; whatever happens to Ingo happens to Emmet. In one way, great, because at least he knows his brother is alive! In many ways, not great, because what the fuuuck

this absolute CALLED SHOT of a plot point in the timeloop fic i can't finish writing whkjwhwjkwh. ok well in that one it's not just "loop back to start of day on death," it's that hisui's trapped in a permanent loop of mmm a little over a week before the world ends, and ingo's the only person conscious of the resetting. it's all very majora's mask. and then over on the other side of the rift, emmet is, yes, ALSO trapped in the loop, and while ingo gets the visual cue of "oops, planet rolled over and died again," emmet has literally. no. fucking. idea. why this is happening, other than that it MUST have something to do with the thing that stole his brother, since that appears to him to be point where it resets to.

imagine how painful it would be to be constantly resetting to the moment just after losing him. trying over and over and over but you're always just a little bit too late. and then on the other side, since the loop starts when ingo arrives, imagine having your entire living memory be a transient and ephemeral thing. the inevitability that every single memory you form will eventually be erased from reality, and you're the only one still carrying it. after the fact of having your entire life stolen once already.

uhhh i got a little distracted oops what were we talking about. OH THAT FIRST IDEA IS ALSO REALLY GOOD. you're right the idea of just being dragged along on someone else's timeloop ride is fuuun. getting to be the passenger, remembering previous iterations but having absolutely no control over it. and especially if this is on top of oop-ingo's dissociative episodes. sometimes he skips a day, and then some other times he makes up for it by doing a day twice. or more than twice sometimes, if the protag's really stuck on a thing. that is actually so fucked up. just no correlation between your personal awareness of time and the actual apparent reality whatsoever.

oouohg and then. fuck now you've got me going. but. i feel like a hallmark of timeloop fics is the target becoming sort of blasé about their mortality or like, the experience of pain. because on the one hand, they have infinite retries so it's nbd. on the other hand, because it's so "simple" to try again, they feel like they have a moral obligation to get it right. do it better. good enough is never good enough when you can try again and again and again for perfect. all it costs is a few moments of pain and then you can save that person, shortcut those hours, be faster be smarter know better– so that's the protag's angle. that's what they're living through, being the center of it.

okok now. now imagine they make it to the highlands, or wherever, having had three regions and three nobles to get comfy with this perfectionist ruleset. except, now they're being shepherded around by ingo. and ingo remembers. and crucially they do not yet know that ingo remembers.

i think i'm imagining they ignore ingo's warning about the alpha crobat, bc, look this is the fast way, charge ahead and get killed. and before ingo can even begin to process any of that, like oh fuck or why did you just run in there or oh fuck, did that kid just die—blink. day resets. and obviously, he can't be sure, but he has to think about that connection, like. it was almost the exact same instant, those two things happened. so he's thinking, while they run the day through again. and then this time he's fast enough to snag them before they can run towards the death monster, like ABSOLUTELY NOT, and when he does they go "huh. that's new."

and he's like FUCK DO YOU MEAN, THAT'S NEW???

and then oops! cat's out of the bag! no takesies backsies protag i don't think you're getting out of this one clean. and then ingo has to deal with the sudden information that the source of his torture for the past few months or however long it's been if you're counting undone days or not, is a teenager dying over and over bc god told them to. what's he even supposed to do with that.

#the nemesis speaks #the nemesis answers #anonymous #pokefic pitch #like he can't be MAD at them. can he? it feels like they're a little bit beyond ''mad'' at this point. #like they obviously need help about this situation. but also. he's still pretty fucked up about the resetting thing. #but you know ingo he's so good at ignoring his own problems bc protag needs help #but protag's like oh fuck i didn't know anyone else was in on this thing. i'm sorry? i think? #and again. we're a little bit beyond sorry at this point!! #timeloop protag

[willowedhepatica]

The night is unsettlingly quiet as Ava sneaks around a corner of a building, her hand hovering over the gun in the holster strapped to her waist.

The air is humid and the brick has been painted a darker shade of red from the trickling of rain that has been steadily falling for over an hour. Ava wipes at her cheek, walks down the alleyway in a steady rhyme and is thankful for the small overhang that momentarily blocks her from the sky. Boss told her the gang would meet up here for 'important transaction of stolen goods' which sounded pretty fucking boring if you asked her. But she was meant to stop it so that was a perfect opportunity to... liven things up a little.

"–this is everything we asked for?"

It's sudden and Ava presses herself against the wall, takes a deep breath before tilting forward to assess the situation.

Four people. Three bigger men that are easily towering over the shorter woman that holds the bag with white knuckles, curly black hair and dressed in some sort of black intricate clothing that was definitely made to block a blow.

"You're free to check if you're doubting us. But we always do our work to perfection, you know that."

It surprises her how young she sounded. Puts a sour taste in her mouth and makes her hope the girl hadn't been forced into this life like she had. That it hadn't been thrust upon her like a duty she had to carry out in order to survive.

Ava scoffed despite herself.

It didn't matter.

It could not matter.

Not if she wanted to be successful in this mission.

There was a stretched moment of silence before the man in the front gestured to the other to move forward. Ava takes her gun out of its holster and pulls the magazine back until it clicks.

Show time.

Just as she lifts the gun to shoot, her thumb ghosting over the trigger, someone bends her arm up, makes her slam into the wall behind her.

"Shi–" A cold hand comes up to press against her mouth, one finger digging into her cheek as if in a warning.

"I wouldn't do that if I were you."

The voice is controlled and low enough to go unheard from a short distance. She has to look up without moving her head to see who trapped her. They lock eyes and Ava can't help but stare, her breath hitching. Her hair was pulled up in a tight bun, exposing a scar that went by her left ear and down to her cheekbone. Her eyes were a deep brown and she realises quickly that she was studying her, looking her over with a clenched jaw.

Ava strains against the grip, against the elbow that digs into her collarbone to hold her in place. The woman's expression doesn't shift but there's a sudden sharp pain by the side of her waist and she realises quickly she's holding a knife against her. One she presses forward in warning until Ava stops squirming.

"I will remove my hand and you will answer my questions, nothing else. Understood?"

And oh, this woman has no idea who she was up against.

Ava nods, repeating the mantra her boss had taught her over and over in her head to convince herself to play along in this little game. You're not allowed to reveal your identity if not strictly necessary.

The hand is removed. Eyes not leaving hers, as if she thought Ava would disappear if she turned away for just a second. Which wasn't entirely wrong...

"Who are you?"

So serious.

Ava licks her lips, tilts her head to the side in a teasing manner. "Really? Your special crew hasn't figured me out yet? And here I've heard you're one of the best."

Her eyes flicks to the side, to where the voices are getting louder. Ava can't see what's happening but by the sounds of it they are leaving pretty fucking soon. She really needed to get this done with. When the woman turns back to her, her voice is strained, brows furrowed in thought as she looks her over again. Likes she knows she's missing something but can't figure out what. "You know about us?"

"The OCS? Yeah. And for what I have gathered you must be one of the main ones... Shannon maybe," There's a clear flicker of recognition when she says it but it's gone as soon as it appears. Ava hadn't been paying that close attention when Jillian rattled off their names and she curses herself now when she actually needs it. Jillian knew Ava had bad memory so she had linked their names with different attributes. How did it go... the leader, the hacker, the crack shot, and the–It dawns on her and she can't help but snort. "Oh I know who you are. Beatrice, isn't it?"

Ava knows she's right as soon as she says it. Can see it in her face. Can feel it in how the knife against her hip loosen ever so slightly. She takes the moment to slide her hand down and grab her wrist, jank the knife to the left. But Beatrice reacts quicker than expected and instead of bringing the knife completely to the side it goes forward. Slices through the fabric of her shirt and into her skin before she pushes Beatrice away.

You're not allowed to reveal your identity if not strictly necessary...

It doesn't take long for Beatrice to regain her balance and she says something Ava misses, can't quite grasp as her hand reflexively comes down to her waist. Her hands come off red. Warm and sticky and she knows if she doesn't do something soon this was going to end pretty fucking bad.

You're not allowed to reveal your identity if not strictly necessary. Not allowed–

"Bea! Everything okay?"

It's the girl. The one who had been trading with the men. Shit. Jillian was not going to be happy.

"It's under control." Beatrice answers bluntly, not leaving Ava out of her sight.

The other glances at her, takes what looks like a gun out from her belt. "Do you want me to–"

"No. We will take her with us."

Ava groans, gritting her teeth at the pain. "I'm right here you know." Beatrice begins to move forward and Ava automatically takes a step back, glances at the wall behind her.

You're not allowed to– fuck it.

She takes a deep shaky breath, feels how the energy begins to flow through her body as the halo activates. It warmths her back and mends her wound back together.

Beatrice stops. Just for a moment, her eyes widening just a fraction. Perhaps she only noticed because she admittedly wanted to know how Beatrice would react to it. How she was going to respond. "You're the halo bearer."

Ava gives her a cheeky smile. Tracks the energy that is slowly growing stronger as she backs up against the wall. "The one and only..." She bows, just for show, before phasing through the wall, closing her eyes and wishing to whatever god that's out there that it isn't solid or she won't fall into a freezer or some shit, (it has happened before).

But no, her back hits the cold cement floor and when she looks around she recognizes quickly that she's in a church. If the large painting of angels reaching out towards a depiction of god on the ceiling were any indication of it.

What was it Jillian said now again? Don't mess around during this mission or you'll likely get yourself fucking shot. Well, something along that style.

A shadow indicates someone's approach before she could hear it. It's a woman she hasn't seen before, but it's clear she runs with the same crew by the look of her clothes. "I have to admit, that's pretty cool. But not very clever."

Ava stands up, quicker than may have been advised after you've been stabbed in the chest, taking a stumbling step backward before reaching for the knife that was strapped to her belt. "Oh yeah? I can show you clever."

The woman doesn't look phased at all and turns to the girl Ava saw trading with the guys earlier. "Camila."

Ava notices the dart right as it is supposed to hit her, dodging it before charging forward and tackling the other woman to the ground. Ava's pinning her, one knee against her stomach and her knife against her throat. She tries to reach for the gun in her belt but Ava blocks it with her boot, thinking just for a moment that she's winning.

That is to say, before there's a hiss right by her ear, a sharp sting blooming in her throat that makes her body go numb. Shit. She jolts up, feeling herself stumble into the wall as the fog slowly takes over. Shit, shit, shit.

When she blinkes, looking at who to blame for the fucking tranquilliser she finds Beatrice looking back at her, arms crossed as if she's just waiting for it to kick in. Ava wills the halo to work, to shake the sedative off just so she can show her it isn't that easy. But they must have a ridiculous high dose on these things because her head only grows foggier and the fear kicks in as she feels herself losing all sensation in her body.

"Don't try to fight it."

Ava's knees buckle and she's clinging to the wall in an attempt to hold herself up but it just isn't working. The last thing she hears before going completely out is Camila. "That took longer than expected."

She's so fucked.

#an au where ava works for jillian #and the halo has been missing(stolen) from the ocs for decades #and ava works against the ocs #probably nothing I will continue because I'm busy with another fic #but this was fun to write #warrior nun #avatrice #warrior nun fanfic #warrior nun fic #my writing #ava silva #sister beatrice

[vacantgodling]

I'm sorry but did I miss something ?? Noble ?? Hello 👀👀

OOOO NOBLE MY BELOVED

so i've actually had noble as a story for a LONG time. a long long time. however i've been extremely intimidated to write it and plan it out because scifi isn't really my... forte? i feel like it should be easy to make a scifi or a space opera but my brain just gets caught up in all the details and i never end up moving forward with them HAHA. but i'm trying to get out of that because writing is supposed to be FUN.

anyway tho, onto noble. just gonna stick this under a cut bc its LONG to ramble and spoilers or whatever bc i never have an excuse to talk about this story and ahhhh i love my son

firstly its called noble because (1) its a story about fuck the government and doing whats right and (2) its a play on noh's name, which is literally pronounced 'noble' (for the most part) when you put it all together.

in this universe earth has kind of been fucked; no one is really born on earth anymore bc the planet has gone to shit and the radiation is so bad and people who still live on the planet are usually sent there as prisoners (so earth is space australia but literally) or they're unlucky enough to be born there. noh was born on earth (though he doesn't remember this) however, he was taken in by the overarching... uh idk space police state government thing. i haven't thought about what it is too much lmao. anyway, babies are usually taken from earth if they have a good aptitude (aka they survived lmao) and since they're abandoned anyway they're indited into our FAVORITE super soldier program.

this program is called JACK and JILL.

the jack and jill program is an elite super soldier police force program where jacks are the brains and jills are the brawn. they go around enforcing laws, doing drug busts, keeping the "peace" around the galaxy etc etc. however, they always go in pairs just like the nursery rhyme jack and jill, and most jacks and jills are trained together from infancy to make sure that they're 100% in sync.

again, this is all shit noh doesn't remember, but he used to be a JILL. his JACK was a woman named amelia rottney. however something happened and he, amelia and some of their other companions (two other jack & jill units comprised of ethan summers (the jack) and iodine mary evelyn (the jill) and neso/neon (so technically speaking and i have to do more research into this to make sure that i am portraying this correctly but neso/neon are a DID system, but bc both the alter (neon) and the host (neso) operate together p well for the most part, they're the only "solo bodied" jack/jill unit. also speaking of representation, noh is mute! he mainly communicates with sign language but he does have implants; which got fucked up when he was first initially found but he eventually gets new ones but this is off topic).

but they all discovered some fucked up shit about the government and wanted to bring it to light obvs (i mean the fact that none of them knew that they were all p much stolen orphans is Bad Probably) however the government got to them first and sought to eliminate them. they all scattered p much, but noh p much sacrificed himself to let the others escape so they tortured him and erased his memory and then left him adrift in space to die. however in like a weird ass ploy to keep power they basically painted noh & co as terrorists that were trying to disrupt the peace of the cosmos, so they offered a reward/bounty for noh & co dead or alive-even though they knew they set him adrift and for all intents and purposes the government isn't looking for him he's dead.

until he's yknow. not dead. since yknow. he was found by a cargo vessel adrift and was able to be saved. tm.

so the whole story is kind of noh being on the run/trying to stay on the DL while he tries to figure out what in the sam hell is going on and then eventually reuniting with his friends and fucking this government up the ass in a bad way.

he also ends up befriending and eventually getting into a relationship with a space pirate rouge thing (i have so much worldbuilding to do its not even funny lmaooooo) named emerion jackson and idk i love their relationship a lot i rotate them in my head LMAO.

but yeah so that's the Extended Cut of what noble is about, maybe i will make this into a coherent wip intro one day LMAOOOO

#s: noble #wip intro #<- for now its getting this tag bc idk when i'm actually going to make this coherent lmao #also if it wasn't guessed #all the characters are poc #i gotta redesign them all tho #and actually maybe?? worldbuild #i should be more like cy and just say fuck it this shit is happening just bc #idk if you'll even see these tags cy but teach me how to Be You

[ferretrade]

Fic Writer 20 Questions

Thanks to @merlyn-bane for tagging me! <3

1.) How many works do you have on ao3

Currently 56!

2.) What's your ao3 word count?

183,482

3.) What fandoms do you write for?

At this moment, it's Star Wars all day every day. Specifically into the prequel era and Star Wars Rebels related stuff.

4.) What are your top five fics by kudos?

Twenty-Two - an Enjoltaire fic I wrote when I was 20 so let's not talk about that

it's a gift to be truly known - skybridger fic, I'm thrilled to see it this high :')

held like a dream - codywan, interesting it's done better than the others

Lost in the Supermarket - another enjoltaire from the wee age of 20, don't look at me

beholder - codywan, I do really really love this one

5.) Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

Yes, mostly! I don't always because it gets mixed up with my anxiety and I feel overwhelmed and pressured. So I live by a policy of "respond if I am feeling it, if not nbd."

6.) What's the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

I genuinely can't think of anything that has an angsty ending. Angsty middles, sure, but I'm a happy ender. I guess it's like poetry, it rhymes (shatterpoint lineage fic) is a little bittersweet?

7.) What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

Hard to choose? I've written some pretty sappy fluff. I've decided on frame the halves, call them a whole (codywan) because you get a good, way pre-O66 fix it that means no one I like died PLUS force sensitive clones! :)

8.) Do you get hate on fics?

I don't believe I ever have!

9.) Do you write smut? If so what kind?

Haha yes. It's generally queer and pretty tame in terms of kink.

10.) Do you write crossovers? What's the craziest one you've written?

Nope, never have.

11.) Have you ever had a fic stolen?

I don't think so! My fics are pretty mid-tier at their highest popularity so I don't think anyone really cares to lol

12.) Have you ever had a fic translated?

Yes and I'm still so, so flattered and thrilled by it. :''') I believe I had one (or even two???) old Les Mis fic translated before, but I don't see it linked on ao3. And then there's this absolute beauty:

Comme de la poésie, ça rime

13.) Have you ever cowritten a fic before?

Not technically, but Haley and I have a draft we lovingly refer to as only fan-akin, doc titled (by Haley, credit where due) "the west wing but if sam married the hooker and became president instead of dropping that storyline and leaving after s3"

14.) What's your all time favorite ship?

Maybe probably Billy/Teddy from Young Avengers. They're my boys!!!

15.) What's a WIP you'd like to finish, but doubt you ever will?

Baby girl, I have WIPs you don't even know. I wish I could write the jedi temple epic I wanted to, but my thoughts and feelings have changed so much the whole concept has collapsed and what I have is too messy to use elsewhere. And then there's the courferre soulmate fic I dearly meant to finish and just never will since the interest dried up.

16.) What are your writing strengths?

Dialogue. That's the easiest part for me to write.

17.) What are your writing weaknesses?

Uh well first of all, actually getting myself to write is a big fucking challenge of mine. But really, the spacial stuff and descriptions kill me. Please know that if you ever read non-dialogue, non-thought parts that you like, it probably took me like 10 writing passes to get it just right. I live in a state of editing and reediting.

18.) Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic?

I just don't! I am willing to add in as much as I know or easy words-- like a bonjour or, if we're talking Star Wars, sprinkles of words like vode. But if someone is talking in sentences, I will straight up do "Sabine said something in Mando'a" or "Stop that, Sabine told him in Mando'a." Easier for me that trying to do bad translations.

19.) First fandom you wrote for?

Young Avengers!

20.) Favorite fic you've ever written?

This is ever changing. While I probably go back and read it's a gift to be truly known the most, I love a single slow desire for it being the best, biggest world building I've done. Plus it's f/f and I need more of that in my writing life

I think everyone ever has been tagged already, but if not! Tags for you: @afoundling @happybean17 @tired-bshocked @goddammitjim

#ferretalk!

[coulsons-fullmetal-cellist]

To Catch a Thief

Featuring one Detective Tim Rockford and a certain thief

Words: 1, 985

The thief had eluded me once more, outsmarted me like a fox. I’ve been staring at the board for hours now, hoping a clue would call out to me, but nothing was popping out.

Normally, I wouldn’t give robbery my time, it just being some petty thief liberating rich assholes of their treasures. But rich assholes are loud and make one hell of a fuss about their property being stolen. I would’ve written this off as some Robin Hood type vigilante except they skipped the give-to-the-poor part.

This thief has proven a challenge to me. He’s like a flowing river; always running, being one step ahead of me, and stepping into its current would surely sweep me away, so I have to stand on the shore and hope to build a dam in time. He’s stolen from all the big-name families, no rhyme or reason to his method. No evidence: not a fingerprint or even an eyelash left behind. It’s like he’s mocking me, a spectre always behind me.

Fuck, I’m tired. I’ve been staring at this board for too long. I should take my mama’s advice and sleep on it, come back to it with fresh eyes. Driving back home, I’m running on autopilot. The darkness greets me as I open the door to my empty apartment. Not bothering to even take my shoes off, I’m out like a light as soon as my head hits the pillow.

The morning wakes me up with her horrible city noises. I slept on my bad shoulder which I regretted as soon as I moved from my slumber. Not even a scalding hot shower could each the eternal ache. It just makes the ugly scar stand out further.

Arriving at the station, I walk into a hurricane of chaos. Another robbery in the night. Once again, the thief has gone under my nose, tickling me with that feather of mockery. There was not enough cheap coffee in the world to deal with this shit storm.

“Rockford, it’s bad. The Ashford’s were hit this time.”

“What was taken?”

“All contents of their safe.”

“Don’t these people use banks anymore?”

Of course, they were making an even bigger storm in the kettle of the interview room. Priceless jewels stolen; family heirlooms gone forever. These rich snobs have all the money in the world and yet they go for the cheapest security because who would dare to steal from them? I’d never say they were asking for it, but you get what you paid for. When you pay for nothing, you end up with nothing in return. I’m sure once their insurance kicks in, they can buy new family heirlooms.

I added this case to my ever growing board and wait for another clue to call to me, but my captain was on my ass about catching this guy. His wife must be friends with these high society types. He’d always brag about the fancy parties he’d attended the night before, sipping on champagne while the rest of us have to deal with cheap instant coffee.

Sipping this cheap swill, my team formulated a plan to set a trap. The Montgomery’s were having some fancy shindig, unveiling a new work of art they purchased for some amount of money that would’ve bought be hot meals for life. Art was the first thing stolen, must’ve had a love of it before going onto things much shinier.

The whole place was swept over like a vacuum cleaner, picking up any bugs of contempt. Security cameras installed and several officers placed around the party scene, uniforms apparently being a downer in the festive atmosphere. And because my captain was attending, I also had to be on alert.

I never understood the rich lifestyle, too much spending money on things that don’t make sense. Who needs a bathroom with two bathtubs? And who enjoys the salty crap of caviar served on a cheap cracker? Give me a roof over my head and a bottle of something alcoholic to ease my pain and I’m happy.

I had to admit my heart wasn’t in it tonight, not completely on the job. I felt more of a thrill in the chase rather than waiting for a mouse to fall into an obvious trap. I was sure nothing would come of this aimless escapade. I was handed a glass of something fancy, so I settled myself down on a chair out of the way of the noise and partook of my gifted libation. Well, liquid gold does have a taste to it.

“Detective!”

I don’t remember falling asleep, the only thing I do remember was being shook awoke by a passing officer. The thief struck again. The easel empty of its work of art. The only thing left was a note.

The first clue and it was deliberately left to mock me. So either he got cocky, or we were so useless at finding even a crumb, he had to start leaving us whole meals out for us. Again, no fingerprints, not even a cobweb was disturbed. Security footage returned nothing, the phantom flying through once again.

Until next time.

“Take this to get the handwriting looked at. Notify me as soon as you have something” I managed to pass the note to an officer, the lad managing to get out before my captain came barging in, all hell following in his wake.

“Rockford! What the hell?”

I quickly rubbed the sleep from my face, hoping he wouldn’t notice I was out in the land of nod when it happened.

“Rockford, how in the hell did this bastard manage to get past us again?”

“Honestly, I only have theories. We were the only ones who knew the plan. Someone must have ratted us out or, it was an inside job. I’ll have to question everyone in the team.”

“An inside job? What kind of crazy are you talking here?”

“It’s the only theory that makes sense.”

“Sense? Tim, when was the last time you looked in the mirror?”

“I avoid it when I can.”

“Well, you look like shit is what you look like. You know what? You’re off the case.”

That hit me like a freight train running a red light.

“Boss, you can’t take this case away from me. I’m close, I know it.”

“I’m sorry but, you haven’t been the same since the accident.”

“I only got shot, I’ve dealt with worse.”

“No, I made a mistake bringing you back too early. I thought a minor case would ease back in, but it’s spiralled out of control.”

“It hasn’t”

“Ten thefts! In the last three months! Ten families robbed of their valuables.”

A dark thought crossed my mind, but thankfully my mouth had control of itself before I could say they deserved what they got. Instead, I just stood there, head hanging in shame and anger.

“You need a bit more time off. Take a vacation somewhere nice.”

I would’ve told him where to take his vacation but decided drowning my sorrows to be a better use of my time. I grabbed a bottle of something on my way out. These rich folks neither minding nor caring whether they had a bottle less in their collection.

My apartment was still empty when I returned; the sunshine reminding me of the loneliness I was set to face. Half a bottle of alcohol in my bloodstream would soon cure me of that, making my brain forget the world existed. I welcomed the darkness like a hug from my mama.

Until I was rudely awakened by thunder. The night greeted me with a display of a thunderstorm Frankenstein would’ve welcomed in his madness. And a creature was on the prowl, making me aware that I wasn’t alone in my apartment. The goosebumps on my arms prickled, alerting me to a presence close by. Drawing my gun I proceeded to hunt down this bastard once and for all. He was a sneaky one, I admit, slithering away out of sight while tempting me with that Forbidden fruit. I swear I would just see him out of the corner of my eye, only to have him disappear as soon as I turned the corner. This twisted cat and mouse game was suddenly interrupted by the ringing of my phone.

“What?”

“Detective Rockford? I have the results.”

“Results?”

I nearly forgot what he was talking about.

“Yeah, we did a writing analysis on the note left at the crime scene.”

A sudden movement caught me by the corner of my eye.

“The handwriting doesn’t match any known criminals” he continued while I slowly approached the shadow, “All we know is that it was done on a notepad found in the house and used with a pen also found there. It’s one of those fancy fountain pens that leaks so the culprit would have smudges on his fingers but sadly no fingerprints.”

I had him now, I said I’d call back and hung up before getting a reply. He was here now, right in front of me. I raised my gun.

“Settle down there, don’t go shooting in here, you could hurt yourself.”

I slowly lowered my gun and stared him square in the eye, something about them strangely familiar to me.

“I have you now.”

“Yes, you do. But let’s have a drink first before you drag me in.”

He held up the once empty glass of mine, in smudges visible on his fingers.

“For a man who hates the rich, you sure do have excellent taste.”

“Cut the drabble, tell me how you managed all those thefts.”

“You know how I did it.”

The man in front of me was talking in riddles. Giving me puzzle pieces without showing me the picture.

“How’d you get in here?”

“You know how I got in here.”

“What are you talking about?”

“Haven’t you figured it out yet?”

Lightning flashed, showing his full form. I dropped the glass from my hand, it shattering on the floor. I didn’t remember being handed one and raised my hand in confusion, noticing ink smudges on my fingers. The thief raised his hand and I looked back into his eyes.

The puzzle pieces in my head were slowly being put back into place.

“Are you me?”

“No, I’m me, you’re you. We just, how do you say it? Have a lot in common.”

It was like looking into a mirror, literally. I’d been avoiding my reflection for months since I got shot, too ashamed to look at myself. My reflection must have taken a life of its own.

“There you were, defending some rich couple getting into their car, being held up by some petty thief. Then you, the good detective goes and gets shot defending their honour. And what do you get in return?”

My scar burned at the memory of it. I scratched away at it, so did he.

“All that pain and suffering, and not even a thank you. In fact…”

“They blamed me for letting him get away.”

The puzzle completed now; the picture came flooding back into your memory. All the pain and humiliation I was put through.

“A desk job was all I was good for when I got back to work.”

“A smart man like you being made to sit the day away in boredom? No wonder your mind started to wander.”

“A challenge was needed.”.”

“Only one you could solve. It was a fun challenge.”

“Fun indeed.”

“And you happened to get revenge against all those rich fuckers who left you to rot in the gutter.”

My smile was demonic now.

“It was fun to see their faces.”

“All to see that smile on your face.”

His smile matched mine. I thanked him with a nod, and he nodded in return. He raised a new glass and brought it to his lips. The whiskey tasted divine on my tongue.

#pedro pascal #jose pedro balmaceda pascal #tim rockford #detective tim rockford #the thief #casillero del diablo #pedro pascal character fanfiction #pedro pascal character fanfic #merge mansion #merge mansion ad #tim rockford fanfic #tim rockford fanfiction #the mandalorian #din djarin #dyn jarren #agent peña #agent pena #javier peña #javier pena #javier gutierrez #javi gutierrez #javi g #agent whiskey #agent marcus pike #marcus pike #marcus moreno #maxwell lord #joel miller #frankie morales #frankie catfish morales

[luvp-music]

CYBERPUNK DEAD BOY [English Translyrics] サイバーパンクデッドボーイ

Original Song by MAIKI Translyric references from Igloo, Wafflesia, CoolMikeHatsune22 and Thai1210

»»————-　♡　————-««

You’re fucking kidding?!

Anything I say passes by their deaf ears Saying music passes by like FASHION, leaving it out to die like a girl ONE NIGHT There’s no meaning, though, they sell their names til they’re dear Posting those ‘what’-toks until they die, oh, such a bore, a chore, so I’ll say GOOD NIGHT

Whatever and however this story goes, the gurus run through the streets Even though right there and here and where and they don’t care right here Where Team Alpha* only wants your piece, so There’s no punchline for you, and there’s no meaning for the song you knew Just ignore the words we wrote like poems old, cause there’s no story to be told

Together, laughing one last time Care for the numbers rather than rhyme? Reaching the top yet it’s not ‘mine’** Ah, what to do? Is this what I’ll go through? Looping all the way around to make something new?

I’ve found myself instead

That’s fucking bullshit! BYE-BYE viral MELODIES So cut the bullshit! Don’t give in to elegies You can’t hide! Confide in the ideals you designed Don’t let the AI bros defile everything we’ve tried***

Don’t care about the money or the jealousies! Can’t let the awkwardness filter out the parodies! You can fight! Don’t hide what’s deep inside, it’s alright! What happened to the messages you wanted to plead? You’re fucking kidding?!

Oh god, there’s no way right? These posers think they’re elite? Why… They’re over there, over here, everywhere I see… You’re fucking kidding?!

Whatever and however this story goes, gurus run through the streets Even though right there and here and where and they don’t care right here Where Team Alpha only wants your piece, so There’s no punchline for you, and there’s no meaning for the song you knew Just ignore the words we wrote like poems old, cause there’s no story to be told

Together, losing all bad vibes Care for the numbers rather than rhyme? Reaching the top yet it’s not ‘mine’ Ah, what to do? Is this what I’ll go through? Looping all the way around to make something new?

I’ve found myself instead

That’s fucking bullshit! BYE-BYE viral MELODIES So cut the bullshit! Don’t give in to elegies You can’t hide! Confide in the ideals you designed Don’t let the AI bros defile everything we’ve tried

Cause there’s no way you’ll make me forgive enemies The ones who wanted money from stealing melodies You can fight! Don’t hide what’s deep inside, it’s alright! Weren’t there some “meta”-phors you wanted to bring to light?

It’s fucking bullshit…

That’s fucking bullshit! BYE-BYE viral MELODIES So cut the bullshit! Don’t give in to elegies You can’t hide! Confide in the ideals you designed Don’t let the AI bros defile everything we’ve tried

Don’t care about the money or the jealousies! Can’t let the awkwardness filter out the parodies! You can fight! Don’t hide what’s deep inside, it’s alright! What happened to the messages you wanted to plead? You’re fucking kidding?!

You’re fucking kidding me!!

»»————-　♡　————-««

* The original song calls out Gen Z, but I felt it more accurate to use Gen Alpha instead. ** Play on how everything’s stolen content now (not actually but you know what I mean) *** I changed the lyric from the original ‘What happened to the things you wanted to sing about’ since it’s already spoken so many times prior. That and fuck AI.

#cyberpunk dead boy #maiki #vocaloidtranslyrics #englishtranslyrics #vocaloid #translyrics #hatsune miku #maiki p #hatsunemiku

[fishboneart]

Fishbone #005

They weren't kidding, that history can rhyme

Only 9 layers and 5 source images this time. Things don't always have to be a federal fucking issue.

With how much ai art wank discourse is rooted in purity politics, especially but not exclusively on tumblr, I was amused by the mental image of slipping into a hazmat suit before venturing into the dangerous and repulsive wasteland of ai art to retrieve alien salvage like the stalkers in Roadside Picnic. It doesn't feel like that, it feels like being a grabby little corvid in the shiny trinket factory, but I still enjoyed the concept.

The rest of the image is about art as alchemical process and I'm not going to explain it.

I've been observing for some time that the objections to ai art are indistinguishable from the objections to photoshop ~20-25 years ago (including the one about "it's different this time bro trust me") so I want to look at some of them a bit closer.

It's not real art

Stop getting your talking points from fascists.

But-

I don't care how you justify it, it's a fascist talking point. Stop.

It's stealing

At risk of resurrecting stupid bullshit I was already bored with 20 years ago, I honestly think there's a better case for this regarding PS than machine learning. PS artists actually do use elements from existing images, lots of them (ideally with permission/license). However, consensus opinion has long since concurred that PS artists substantially transform and recontextualise those elements and the result is an original creation, same as physical collage.

As I've come to understand it, ML doesn't use elements from existing images, just mathematical descriptions of image attributes. It doesn't incorporate images on any level, or even pieces of images, so I'm left wondering what's being stolen here? I'm not being shitty I genuinely can't see anymore what is stolen when ML simply does not use any part of any existing image to generate an image.

There's no skill/creativity involved

The first time I ever used adobe photoshop (I've long since switched to GIMP, change the name, FOSS 5evar, etc.) I spent about fifteen minutes excitedly stacking filters on a picture of a butterfly, before the person showing me how it worked dismissively explained that filters don't make art.

Elements and principles of design are learned skills. They're taught at art school because they're not innate and they're important as hell. I often feel like people are tacitly arguing all that stuff's just padding--and if you're staunchly anti-ai-art I promise that's not an argument you want to make, it will backfire spectacularly on you.

And yeah, I think everyone still agrees that just piling filters on a photo isn't very creative and takes no particular skill. I doubt anyone thinks instagram filters take a good photo for you. I think (or hope) that we all understand now that complex image editing and manipulation does in fact take skill and creativity.

I can't help but wonder how much of the vapid trash we're seeing in the explosion of ai art is the equivalent of the 2000s explosion of shitty filtered photos.

The computer does it for you

There's so much more to PS art than filters, and the computer emphatically does not do any of that stuff for you. It doesn't do composition or colour theory or concepts or art history for you. It just does what you tell it to, you still have to make the art good. Fishbone #001 involved manually isolating dozens of fucked up hands from ML images, and I complained about it the entire time and the computer didn't even get me a cup of tea.

A lot of people used to actually genuinely believe that photoshop was a magical plagiarism machine that you stuck stolen art in and it automatically made perfect composites for you. Probably some people still do, it's a big world. But it never was true, no matter how hard they believed it.

Is there more to ML image generation? Idk I'd have to try it to find out for sure and I'm very tired. But the more I learn about it the more I think there could be. The frequency with which I see very elaborate and specific prompts with garbled and all-but-irrelevant images does at least suggest that the magical ease of making ai art has been somewhat oversold.

Using it in any way is cheating/cheapens your art

I think the cheating idea mostly came from the photography community, who thought PS was a shortcut to better photos for undisciplined talentless hacks who couldn't be bothered to learn to take a good photo. The irony. But for me, since I wasn't using it to improve photos, this was such a weird take. Cheating at what? At photoshop art? I'm cheating at photoshop by... using photoshop?

And the idea that using PS at any stage in your process irredeemably sullies your art is just stupid on its face. It's not radioactive. It's not a PFAS. Sin isn't real. Santa isn't putting you on the naughty list for photoshopping. The Galactic Council of Artistic Integrity aren't checking for pixels.

Needless to say, since 100% of the source images I use in this project are ML generated, I also think it's a bit of a silly objection to ML image generation.

It has no soul

I am not and have never been christian. I do not and will never care what your imaginary friend thinks about art.

Also, this is a repackaged fascist talking point. I told you to stop that.

It sucks

Most of everything sucks, what's your point?

People are going to lose their jobs

Unfortunately this one had some connection to reality. By about 2010 there were almost no painted book covers, and painters who'd made their living from them were forced to adopt PS or find a different job. It wasn't just book covers of course, commercial artists across the board felt the pinch of automation. That's not exactly PS's fault, the parasitic owning class will simply take any opportunity to fuck over a worker for half a buck, and PS art is generally cheaper because it's generally faster to make.

I actually have some questions about how this will play out with ML though. Currently, yes, it's looking very much like in ten years there won't be any PS book covers any more, but I think the parasitic owning class are going to quickly remember they don't actually want art that they can't hold copyright over, and human artists will remain necessary. No one wants a logo they can't trademark. No one wants commercial art if they can't control the licensing. I don't even think it'll take a wholeass test case, just a few things like selfpub novels using the same cover image as a major release or folks using pure ML images from the big stock sellers without paying, and as soon as they realise they can't sue anyone about it they'll come crawling back, cap in hand, to hire you back as a contractor at an insultingly low rate.

People will lose their jobs or find their billable hours severely cut, but, unfortunately, as the brave Luddites showed us, you can't stop automation by fighting the machine, no matter how noble your motives. You need to actually change society somewhat.

But I think this should be enough of a concern without having to also make shit up. You can just object to ML on the basis of tangible harms it will be used to inflict on individuals and society. That's plenty to be mad about, you don't need to put lipstick on it.

It's different this time bro trust me bro

Plenty of people sincerely believed that rise of PS was fully automated skill-free art theft and the sky was falling, and pointing out that all the same things were said about the invention of everything from the photocopier to home video to the printing press to the camera didn't even slow them down because this time it's different, this time it really is that bad. It wasn't.

And I honestly don't know anymore if it is.