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mnthpprt · 4 years

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Chapter 9: Naked And Not So Afraid

Back in my room, I throw myself onto the bed. I had not realized I was this tired, especially since I stayed up all night, but soon I am fast asleep with my modern clothes still on.

A knock on the door awakes me from my nap, and I groggily shuffle across the room to open it. Sebastian greets me with a much needed cup of coffee and two large bags, which he hands to me before setting the tray on my nightstand.

“What’s this?” I say, peeking inside the bag. I pull out a brand new pair of heeled leather boots.

“A gift from le Comte. We were able to tell your size from your skates yesterday, but he had to guess for the dresses,” he explains.

Dresses? I empty both bags onto the bed to see an array of undergarments, a corset, and three different dresses. They seem expensive, the fabric soft and thick, but they are simple enough for everyday wear in this time period. Among the pile of clothing, I find a neatly folded piece of paper. ‘Ma chérie Anaïs’, it reads, and I open it.

“With these new clothes you will be able to roam the town freely. I sincerely hope you like them. Yours, le Comte de Saint-Germain.’

“They’re beautiful, thank you!” I smile at Sebastian, who assures me he will let le Comte know of my satisfaction. “I think I need a bath before I can try them on, though.”

“There are towels and a robe in your wardrobe, along with some slippers,” the butler tells me. “Do you remember where the thermae is?” I tell him I do. “Excellent. Just leave your dirty clothes in this basket so I can wash them with the rest of the laundry.” I turn to where he is pointing in the corner, but then I think of something.

“Sebastian? I noticed you do everything around here, and I was wondering if I could help. You know, since I’ll be staying here for a while.” He takes his time before nodding slowly, thoughtfully, as if he is hesitant to let me take over some of his duties. “I would make a terrible maid, but I saw there is a huge garden outside. I worked as a florist while I was in university, maybe I could do that. Take care of it, so you can do other things. I don’t mind the work, in fact, I need something to keep me busy for the next month.”

“We can talk about that later with le Comte,” he says, after clearing his throat. “For now, you don’t need to worry about it. Enjoy your bath.”

He leaves my room with a friendly smile, and I immediately take a sip of the coffee. It is still hot, but I drink it as fast as I can before changing into the robe and slippers I find in the wardrobe, just like he told me. I have only slept a couple hours. It is going to be a long day. At least I feel more comfortable in the mansion now, though the fact that I am surrounded by vampires never leaves the back of my mind.

Sebastian, also human, seems to be doing fine. That alone eases my worry of becoming prey to the beautiful men that live here. Still, it is a lot to take in: time travel is real, vampires are real, what’s next? I try not to think about such things, and settle with hoping to get used to them over time if I ignore them for long enough. Joking around with Leonardo last night proved to be a decent coping mechanism, and were it not for that, I would have surely descended into a panic attack. I hope it works the same way for everything else.

I walk into the thermae, towel in hand, only to see somebody already in the water. it’s Arthur Conan Doyle.

“Sorry! I didn’t mean to... I’ll just come back later.”

“It’s quite alright, dear. Why don’t you join me?” He turns to me with a playful smile and I can see his bare chest over the edge of the bath. Though I know he is just flirting, I still allow myself a few seconds of thoughtful consideration before shrugging.

“Fuck it, why not,” I say, and begin to untie my robe. “I am too tired to wait, anyway.” Apparently I am too tired to care, too, because I ignore his watchful eyes as I get into the water, fully nude. Once inside, I notice the expression of surprise on his face.

“What, have you never seen a woman before?” I tease him. He blinks and clears his throat, getting rid of his stupor before returning to his usual flirty attitude with a chuckle.

“I just did not expect you to do it, though I must say I am enjoying the view.” I roll my eyes at his comment and sink into the bath’s warmth with a sigh. “Are those tattoos?”

“Mhm,” I simply mutter, closing my eyes. At least he knows what they are. I do not feel like explaining it again, though I understand the residents’ curiosity. “They are not unusual in my time. Why, you like them?”

“They suit you.” I can hear the smile in his voice when he answers. I open one eye to find his blue eyes scrutinizing my body through the water, and I splash him in the face.

“Stop staring. I can’t relax if I’m being ogled like an object,” I scold him. He laughs.

“I heard about the incident with Newt.” He must be referring to Isaac. “You know, the bite of a vampire causes pleasure unlike any other. I personally use it during foreplay, I would be happy to show you.”

“Oh, you should have said so before!” I exclaim, now looking at him. “What woman wouldn’t trade becoming anaemic for an orgasm? I swoon!” My mocking tone does not faze him in the slightest. In fact, his smile grows even wider. “That is to say, Arthur, you can quit your bullshit. I’m not interested.”

“If you say so, darling. Though you should know I will not be able to resist trying. What’s the future like?” The sudden change of topic catches me off guard, but I welcome the question if it means he will stop being a pervert for the time being. “Is it true that there are machines that fly?”

“Airplanes? Yeah, I was just in one of those about a week ago. Well, before I crossed the door. There’s also a long distance train, but from London it was much faster to just fly over.” I oblige in satiating his curiosity, sparing no detail. I am about to describe what planes look like when he interrupts me.

“You came from London? I was under the impression that you were Spanish. I overheard you and Leonardo.” I tilt my head, a silent question visible on my face, and he clarifies. “I used to be a medical doctor. They called me to help in case anything happened to you, but you came out unharmed, so I did not bother going into the kitchen.”

“Oh. Well, I am Spanish, but I moved to London to study in university. Chemistry,” I explain, a soft smile on my lips. “By the time I graduated, I’d gotten so used to it I didn’t want to leave. It’s outrageously expensive to live there, but I’m sure you can appreciate its charm better than anyone.”

“Almost as much as I appreciate yours,” he confers with a cheeky smile of his own. “I have soaked here long enough. Turns out being a vampire does not prevent pruning fingers, so I’ll let you enjoy the bath by yourself. But do not hesitate to call me should you ever want company,” he winks.

“Bye, Arthur,” I dismiss him. I look away when he gets up and out of the water, not wanting to fuel his compulsive flirting. Save for that slight problem of his, he seems nice.

After I hear him walk away, I turn around to make sure he is gone, and once again relax into the water. This will be a long day, indeed.

#ikemen vampire #ikevam #ikevamp #ikemen #ikemen fanfiction #ikemen vampire fanfiction #ikevam fanfic #ikevamp fanfiction #ikemen vampire arthur #ikevamp arthur

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superluckymeworld · 4 years

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About my life

This is the story of my time with Lucky, my constant companion and soul mate.

Today, I would like to share a very personal post. It is about a very lovable and loyal dog called Lucky. He was a 9 years and 4 months old English cockier spaniel, my constant companion, my shadow who has been with me through all my ups and downs. During my lowest period from April 2019, he was my motivation to continue to live life to the fullest. I have never shed a single tears for all my suffering. But since August 2020, my life changed forever.

On 28 August, we discovered he has hemagiosarcoma. It was a terminal blood cancer that can strike one in 5 healthy animals, esp dogs. The next day, he had an operation to remove his spleen. However the cancer has reached his lung. He also has internal bleeding so his stomach was constantly bloated. My very brave and resillent dog did not give up despite the vet trying to persuade us to do informing us that there was no hope. So we let him undergo blood transfusions as he is also anaemic, chemo, acupuncture and even hyperbaric oxygen therapy. Throughout his ordeal, he remained true to himself and still devoted to carrying out all his regular daily routine such as accompaning me everywhere I go including the bathroom, sitting besides me in my home office, lunching with me in the dining room, and of course sleeping in the bedroom. He also waited faithfully for my husband to come home from work, greeted him, waited for his treat and massage. Kenlin is very good with that and the doggies simply love it.

We also brought him downstair to his poo area where he did his normal stuff although, he need to be carried down due so as not to overstress him.

We went to the vets so many times and the van he travelled in became his own vehicle that he does not bark anymore whenever he travelled in it. At the vet, he still growl at all the dogs that wanted to befriend him.

At home, he still followed his other favourite companion, Cherie the beagle, his sister and "wife". They still eat together and sleep together. They were together since he arrived home when he was only 5 months old. However, he was still his usual self sometimes, not allowing Cherie to be near me or shared our love. Lucky is still Lucky until the morning of 7 October.

We do not usually woke up that early as we stayed throughout the night taking care of him. That morning, we were up early as I have an hospital appointment. Kenlin was up at 6am and spent some time with him as he was sleeping at the corridor.

I was ready to leave the house but also spent some time with him. At 7.45pm, I was able to say a proper good bye to him, and even came back twice to say goodbye. It could be an instinct that I always have had in my life. I was even able to take a few photos of him and a video of me talking to him. It was later when I viewed the video that he had tears in his eyes.

I left the house to take at taxi. While in the taxi, talking to the driver about Lucky, Kenlin called me at 8.10pm. The news broke my heart. Lucky has just passed on. We have already planned that one of us will be around with Lucky at all times so he was at home taking care of him while I am out.

It was quick one. He just tried to get up, let out a loud bark and just collapsed and was gone. For that, we were thankful. However, Kenlin told me that he had vomitted out lots of blood.

Lucky had always knew that I do not like to see gruesome stuff. So he left me with a beautiful image of him looking at me lovingly with his teary eyes.

"I will always love you and be with you where ever you are."

Thank you, Lucky for being part of my life. 12.12pm Sunday 25 Oct 2020.

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hemlockd · 4 years

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headcanon dump. head empty but thoughts runneth over

sou has a 25m^2 apartment and so, so many things he doesn’t need. he’d look for a roommate but he doesn’t exactly want to sacrifice his privacy. he’s the type to have a pool table in his apartment but also sleep on a mattress. he also does not have the room for a pool table in his apartment........ impulse buyer, what can i say. some over-the-top house decorations he owns include: framed movie posters, a shag carpet, lava lamps and a wholeass neon sign, the kind you’d see in front of an old-timey diner.

he's almost a college dropout. he took a break to gather the funds to continue but he's this close to quitting entirely. he’s a computer engineering major because 1) hackerman™ 2) it's my own major and if i have to suffer then so do my muses

yttd apparently thinks everyone who is mildly tech-savvy knows how to hack into a godforsaken security system so i'm here to say sou has experience working as a tech at a security company but he got fired-- they let him go because you could kinda only depend on him as far as you can throw him. he used to be a responsible individual and work hard when it comes to his career / academics / the works, and was actually very ambitious! but all that chipperness sort of spiraled right down the toilet as he got older. he’s been disillusioned with the world pretty much since high school, not really putting in more than the minimal possible effort... which almost worked until it didn't. mdd has a lot to do with it but that's, ah, a whole ‘nother can o' worms.

a comprehensive list of ridiculous odd jobs sou worked? in between dog walking and lawn mowing ( god, he hated doing that-- certainly wanted to draw various profane shapes into the grass, on multiple occasions ), he... did have to work as a mascot for a short while. bring that up on your own responsibility.

he was definitely close to his parents at a certain point but the “oh i was so spoiled as a kid ahaha!” was kind of a half-lie to make him seem more harmless. they certainly treated him well but he got estranged from his parents practically from the moment he moved out so that's pretty telling of their relationship. they weren’t exactly around a lot.

he wears those ridiculous ass winter hobo clothes inside because he's anaemic and drops dead at any temperature lower than 20 celsius. honestly, it's kinda funny. he is also the least physically coordinated person you'll ever meet. slow as a sloth with literally no muscle mass to use and no energy to expend, but... he has good aim, for what it’s worth? ( cold + necessary coordination + exercising energy he does Not Have = take him ice skating and he'll hate you forever. use this information to torture him however you'd like. )

sidenote? the fact that he hung around the guy he consciously recognizes as extremely sketchy during high school and it turned out he didn't even attend their school leads me to believe he had nowhere else to really turn to during that period. like, in canon he jumps at every chance to label himself as "weak" and to protect kanna. the whole philosophy of ‘using people before they can use you’ leads me to believe he was not treated well by his peers even excluding mr seaweed hair midori. what i imagine is this very smart but naive unpopular kid bullied at school and manipulated into doing things for others to gain their attention/recognition and getting all sorts of trouble pinned on him... then comes midori, seeing an easy target, and the rest is history. ouch.

#῾◞ ☆ ...and tell me what you find / hc.#based on blocks of text i spammed to ray and eli on disco #he's not even officially on here yet i'm getting there i'm just lazy

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buttercupsfrocks · 4 years

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Yo, tumblr! And a belated happy 2020 to you!

Sooooo, my horrendous workload has come to a halt, (35 student dissertations since you ask), and it would appear that my health concerns were almost certainly stress related. And, while the situation responsible for most of said stress is still ongoing, I’ve taken what measures I can to ease things and alleviate stress in other areas of my life. They haven’t quite come into play yet but I’m cautiously optimistic.

Meanwhile I’ve been wearing quite a lot of clothes and here are some grainy photos to prove it. I have to edit the hell out them post-shoot, and my need to bump up the exposure setting has resulted in my looking somewhat anaemic, for which I apologise. I was aiming for dewy and ethereal when I put my slap on, which probably amounts to the same thing.

Now here’s a turn up for the books. I’ve realised of late that my personal style is starting to evolve. Or devolve. Or something. Sixty hit me hard last year in a way I wasn’t expecting. I’m usually pretty good with birthdays but sixty felt significantly different. I don’t think it’s internalised ageism but, to me, sixty is officially entry level Old. C’mon, I’m embarking on my seventh decade, haven’t seen a period in nine years, and live with a laundry list of medical conditions, all of which run in my family apart from my clapped out thyroid. I have an Old Git’s Oyster Card that enables me to travel around London for free for the next five years, (by which time the card will probably have been axed and the state pension age raised to ninety), and undeniably have fewer years ahead of me than behind. I’ve also become rounder round the middle than I was before and while I’ve learned to live with my scar, I feel self conscious about wearing a really low neckline these days. All of which seems to have had a knock on effect on the kind of clothes I find myself drawn to lately.

Tumblr, I’ve embraced the prairie dress. Or, to be more precise, re-embraced it. I tried to resist the capacious charms of this denim Monsoon number. I tried to remind myself that this is the kind of dress I used to wear back when I’d forgotten what it was like to have a choice; the kind that made me feel 60 when I was 35. And then I remembered that I am 60 now so it’s probably okay to wear it. I wouldn’t mind but I’ve been royally slagging off the trend for what Karen and I dubbed the Sister Wife look ever since it hit the catwalk in late 2018. And here I am with not one, but two in my wardrobe. (The other, which I’ll share soon, was a sales score from AND/OR at John Lewis and is even more capacious than this one).

I don’t feel obliged to dress differently because of my age and I don’t believe anybody else should. I will certainly never forgo the opportunity to wear bright colour and loud pattern as often as humanly possible, and you may prise my “undignified” novelty jewellery out of my cold, dead paws. All the same I find myself leaning more and more towards the lagenlook aesthetic. Maybe it’s just something that happens naturally to arty-farty women? An inexorable slide into wafty kaftanhood.

Maybe I’m overthinking it?

Missed you, tumblr.

#Fatshion #Plus size fashion #ootd #plus size style #Monsoon #John Lewis

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heal-thy-health · 4 years

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Bloody hell.

Bloody hell. Literally what I feel like I’m living in most days - a bloody hell.

I miss thinking it was bad bleeding for a week straight once a month, now I would take that any day. Heck, I’d even take two weeks a month, because after you’ve been bleeding for 6 months straight - with one or two days off a month - you kinda get over it. And by kinda I mean you REALLY get over it.

Incredibly I’m not anaemic (yet), much to my doctor’s surprise. Although the bleeding has been getting worse lately and my symptoms seem to be getting out of hand.

Rewind to December 2019 when I first visited the doctor about said problem. I had been for almost two months straight at this point, so I was like “hmmm okay, maybe it’s time to get that checked out”. This is not the first time that I’ve been through something like this, so I brushed it off for far too long. As did the doctor. She told me that this was most likely due to my PCOS and my weight, and said that if I lost weight it would probably go away. I was not leaving that office without a referral to get an ultrasound, so I requested one and she said that it ‘probably wasn’t necessary’ but she would give me one anyway.

Fast forward a week to the morning I went in to get the ultrasound done. I was instructed to drink 1 litre of water and hold it for an hour prior to the appointment. If you’ve ever had to do this, you know how hard this can be. Especially travelling to the imaging centre, where I nearly pissed myself every time I went over a bump. I arrived and checked in, and the receptionist asked me to sit in the waiting area and told me that I would be seen to shortly. 20 excruciatingly long minutes later, the sonographer called my name and I waddled into the examination room, trying so hard to hold myself (well, my bladder) together.

The sonographer was a woman, and she had the most kind voice which so I instantly felt comfortable around her. I quickly explained what was going on, and she proceeded to start the pelvic ultrasound. Once she had taken all the images she needed, she finally let me go to the toilet. Gosh that was a satisfying feeling. I re-entered the room where she told me to hop back onto the bed as it was time for the transvaginal ultrasound. “Shit” I thought, “glad I shaved”. As if that was my biggest worry at the time.

In went the ultrasound wand. “This is the most action I’ve had in months” I nearly said, although I’m sure that would’ve made her as uncomfortable as I was in the moment, so I shut my mouth. She began asking me questions, which was a welcomed distraction. I explained to her that I had been diagnosed with PCOS when I was about 18, and that I had been living with irregular periods since they first started. I also told her that I had been diagnosed with uterine fibroids in the past but it had never been this bad.

Then came the burning question, the one that makes my stomach sink every time I’m asked it, “do you have kids?”. “No” I said, “I wish”. I really was wishing. Every single day since we began trying, and every single day prior to that for many years. I’ve always wanted to be a mother. Anyone who knows me knows how much I love children and how much I yearn to have my own.

We began trying in on July 29, 2019. The fact that I know the exact date off the top of my head should tell you how invested in this I am. Given my history, I knew it wasn’t going to be an easy stunt to get pregnant. I had not had a period for over a year when we began trying, and two months later I started one that never actually ended. I still held hope that this would happen naturally.

The sonographer kept probing me (with questions AND the ultrasound wand) until she had kind of stumbled over what could potentially be causing my incessant bleeding. “The lining of your uterus is VERY thick” she said, “how long did you say you’ve been bleeding for again?”. “Around two months” I replied, “why’s that?” She proceeded to tell me that I had what looks like endometrial hyperplasia, a condition that she personally had never seen in someone my age; a condition that normally doesn’t affect woman under the age of 40. Of course I did. Of course at 24 I was the freak who had something like this. She kept moving the wand around, taking pictures of my fucked up insides. She then moved it to examine my ovaries. “You’ve got over 30 cysts on each ovary and they’re measuring at about 4x the size that they normally should”. “Love that for me” I said, trying to shake off the feeling that I was about to get even more bad news.

Once the ultrasound was over, she had a quick chat to me about my fertility issues. She said that by the condition of my ovaries and uterus, conceiving naturally was probably going to be impossible for me and gave me the name of an IVF clinic in Sydney that bulk billed. She suggested that I think about it and try to get a referral from my doctor to go there.

I got dressed and left the office, ready to go to work. I didn’t know what to think or what to say. I knew something was wrong, but I didn’t know just how wrong yet.

I called my mum to let her know what was going on and burst into tears. My heart was breaking at the thought of being unable to have kids. Even though it wasn’t actually said, I knew that I most likely wouldn’t even be able to carry a baby with the state that my uterus was in. I hung up the phone and called my boss, again bursting into tears, and she told me to have the day off and go home to rest.

That day was hard, but little did I know that things were about to get a lot harder.

#endometrial hyperplasia #pcos #polycystic ovarian syndrome #infertility #ivf #ultrasound

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learningdisabilitynurse · 5 years

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Advocacy and annual health checks are vital.

Let’s begin this post with a boring but highly relevant title! This leads on to what is usually a fairly rambling post, but reaching the (title) point towards the end.

My main focus of this post is the unbelievably weird and gentle and kind man that is my baby brother.

There we are, being adorable.

Charlie is 21. He works in Asda full time and has done for a couple of years now (if he reads this, I’m sure I will be corrected to exactly how many months), he’s the tallest of the family at nearly a foot taller than me. He is obsessed with musicals, doctor who, the stock market comparisons for different food stores, blue-link wikipedia binges, and of course - experiences in retail. He also loves hugs. And dogs!

Also, for those who don’t know him (skip if you do), he has autism and learning disabilities. He’s also had hypotonia (low muscle tone) since he was a baby, so his posture continues to be poor and he wears splints on his legs and super-cool (and MASSIVE) pedro boots to support his weak muscles. He has (very well managed, currently) issues with obsessive compulsive disorder and anxiety and (the main focus of this post), he was recently diagnosed with ulcerative colitis.

So, let’s talk about this last point because it leads onto THE point.

Ulcerative colitis is one of the inflammatory bowel diseases where your body has a reaction to normal bacteria, and believes it is foreign and starts fighting it, an autoimmune condition, causes inflammation and ulcers along the rectum/colon and upwards. It is life-long, and can go through long periods of not affecting daily life until a big flare up will (unless you’re Charlie), put people with UC in agony, spending most of their days on the toilet, often anaemic due to bleeding inside the colon, and sometimes results in hospital admissions for anaemia and dehydration - but for people diagnosed with UC results in a huge increase of medications during a flare up to get on top of it, limited social life or work during that period until there is a handle on it again.

Now, for Charlie’s and your sake I won’t go into the details of his bowels - but I will tell you that symptoms for this had began probably as far back as last May. Charlie had been excreting blood ever since, and spent a good portion of his day in the toilet. To begin with, it wasn’t that awful or that obvious - and we, his family, did not know. Fast forward to December 2018, and we are all sufficiently concerned about it. Mum had taken him to the GP, only to be fobbed off that it was another issue of constipation and ‘probably’ haemorrhoids (obviously, they did not check), just take extra laxatives. Charlie was spending a huge amount of his work time in the toilet by this stage, and his employers are amazing with him but it’s not ideal, he has also had embarrassing episodes occasionally, and we - his family - were all too aware of the blood that continued leaving him due to the patterns around the toilet (TMI?). So, when my sister came home after christmas we started a bowel chart for him - and the truth was outed, many times he was visiting the toilet, it was just blood and nothing else. We also got a true picture of how many times a day. Then, I took him back to the GP, a summary of the bowel charts in hand and decided on not leaving until further testing had been ordered. It was, and then a couple of weeks later I attended the colonoscopy with him where - yes, it was confirmed, that our poor boy has ulcers extensively, and that was the cause of the bleeding (another concern was obviously the C-bomb), treatment was to be commenced immediately. Now Charlie will be on life-long medication and management, but a lot of that will be done by us his family. He can take the tablets, sure, but he will not notice or be particularly bothered for another flare up so we have to keep on top of that and manage any other complications. Mum has taken him to follow up appointments at the IBD clinic, and thankfully the GP are now taking it seriously.

But this leads me onto my point.

Adults with learning disabilities qualify for annual health checks, and they are SO SO important. But the how and when and who with is important too. Charlie is a very able man, he’s really intelligent and he works - but without us (his family) being advocates for him, we still would not be at this stage. People with learning disabilities need their GPs to advocate for them, but this requires an understanding of the processing abilities of that individual and - we all know - GPs do not have time. Charlie comes across so able, so when healthcare professionals ask him questions about his bowels or other health aspects, he will answer the question - but that doesn’t mean he’s understanding and often the point is missed. Abby (my sister), when discussing the issues with him broke it down into words and phrases charlie understood, so we could get a proper picture of what was happening, and when I took Charlie to the doctors and for his colonoscopy I spent the time interpreting to Charlie what the doctors meant, and vice versa, and re-wording questions to Charlie so he could give the true answer. Sometimes that is all being an advocate involves. Without my mum, my sister and I doing this, we still probably wouldn’t have gotten any further. Charlie does not feel pain, part of his autism (and no, all people with autism are not the same and some feel pain acutely), but that meant he wasn’t giving standard answers or putting the urgency on that most people with this condition would - he was just getting on with daily life.

This is a problem, not just for Charlie, but for people with a huge range of disabilities and learning disabilities - and it’s vital those who know them become advocates. An annual health check is great, but without an advocate for those who need it, huge things can still get missed - and a reminder that people with learning disabilities have a life-expectancy 20 years shorter than those without - and a big part of this comes down to their health needs not being met. If you are a carer, a family member, a friend, a nurse, a doctor, an OT, etc etc - any person close to those with learning disabilities, with a professional responsibility and without, just check that they have a good advocate, and talk to them and their advocate about concerns so that they are properly treated, promptly - and if they don’t have an advocate, it is our shared responsibility to ensure somebody steps up to the plate!

Thanks for coming on this ramble with me, it’d probably be more concise... but I must get ready for work.

#learning disabilities #ulcerative colitis #annual health checks #advocacy #RNLD #family #autism

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himbohargreeves · 6 years

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What do you think is good/not so good about birth control?

Good (most of these apply to me personally and aren’t general aksjdha):

- I can now function as a person while on my period instead of being crippled in bed for two days because my cramps are so bad I can’t move (I still get bad cramps but nowhere near the level they were before bc and painkillers get rid of them)

- My iron levels are way better (still not good but better, I was anaemic because my periods were so heavy I lost shit loads of iron every month)

- Related to prev. statement, I now don’t have to wear overnight pads during the day and change them every hour because I get lighter periods now (I only use the lightest flow pads now)

- My titties increased in size by the smallest margin

- No more surprise periods because bc keeps them 100% regulated

- Can also choose to skip a period completely if it aligns with an event or anything

Not so good:

- Have to remember to take a pill every day which, even with reminders set on my phone, I still struggle with

- One time I just puked completely randomly and the only thing I could link it to was the fact that I’d taken my bc pill the night before for the first time in a week after my period ended?? But it’s only happened once in the 5 years so I still don’t know if it was actually that??

- I know a lot of people experience all kinds of side effects with different bc I was just super lucky that the first pill my nurse tried me on worked perfectly for me

#Anonymous

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fromthedeskofelizabeththird · 6 years

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☆Should we know us a little bit better tag☆

Tagged by @catchthespade

THE FIRST

Sport: Swimming! I loved it, but unfortunately my mother put a stop to it the moment I got my first period. (To be fair, I was ten at the time and very anaemic)

Vacation: Wales when I was three. I remember basically nothing about it besides climbing a grassy hill with my dad from our caravan into Llandudno. If we’re talking overseas, it was Krakow in Poland

Kiss: It was with a boy called Mark when I was about six. We said we’d get married when we were older and should practice kissing.

THE LAST

Drink: A double chocolate mocha

Phone Call: Last I received was from Somalia and I didn’t answer it so no clue what it was for. Last I made was to get the results of a blood test.

Song you listened to: One of the ending songs to Akatsuki no Yona (this)

Kissed someone and regretted it: lmao yes

Gotten drunk and throw up: No, haha. I’m not sure I’ve ever in my life been drunk, as opposed to tipsy

Laughed until you cried: Yesterday because of this

GENERAL

Do you have siblings: No

Pets: None, but I want a houseful

Eye color: Light brown

Hair color: Brown. A hairdresser said once that it’s auburn? I don’t think it’s red enough though.

Long or short hair: Long, long, long. My mum made me cut it short when I was little and it looked. Bad.

Piercings/Tattoos: Both! I have my ears pierced twice, a belly piercing and a tattoo on my right wrist. I want more :(

Zodiac: Aries

Since when do you have your blog: I made this one in the summer of 2016 but didn’t start posting until about October because I was so nervous about joining another fandom having just left a toxic one. I started posting on my main blog in 2011, but I’d had it for a while before then.

What’s on your Blog?: Mostly Mystic Messenger

What’s your kink: ten minute hugs and cheesy pizza (lmao i’m not opening this can of worms)

Did you ever want to slap someone: Yes!

What can you tell about your personality: Quiet, but you can’t shut me the fuck up once I’m comfortable with you.

What do you hate: Liars, misinformation, manipulators. I hate it when people try and masquerade opinions with fact or leap to conclusions with limited evidence. I hate purity politics and harassment. I feel like the internet was just designed to stress me out. (Case one) (Case two) (Case three)

WHICH IS BETTER

Hugs or Kisses: Hugs!

Lips or eyes: Eyes

Shorter or taller: I don’t really have much of an opinion. I was considered tall when I was younger, but I stopped growing height-wise at 12, so went from incredibly tall to short as fuck within a year. They both have their advantages.

Older or younger: Depends on context. There are shitty people in both camps for a number of reasons.

Hands,Chest or Butt: Hands on men, chest on girls, butt on both

I’m not gonna tag anyone but you can do this if you want!

#elly talks #shut up elly

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aplaceforthesoul · 6 years

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19/f. This is kinda TMI, sorry, but I’m very conflicted inside. My period always worsens my depression a lot, so my doctor had me start taking the pill continuously instead of having a placebo week. She told me if i could tell my body was trying to have a period I should let it. That’s happening right now but I’m currently in a depression where I want to hurt/kill myself so I can’t afford for it to get worse. But also I don’t want to completely mess up my body. Thoughts?

Not TMI at all. I actually understand what you mean? Im on the injection for the fact that my period made me feel depressed and in agony every month (being anaemic didn’t help). Maybe the injection would be something worth trying? It’s every 12 weeks, which also takes the burden off of remembering to take a pill. Please research it fully and come to your own decision and discuss it with your doctor but I personally haven’t had a period for around 8 years and I’m much happier this way. Not having periods doesn’t mess your body up, you don’t actually have to have a period but obviously you may not want to have the injection because of the stuff that goes into it.

And I’m not sure you’ll get it easily because of your age as they are iffy about giving it to younger people but if you push for it it may be available. And contraception is a personal choice and you have to decide for yourself with all the information given to you. Look at all your options but you’re deffo not messing your body up friend. Your mental health is important and if what you’re doing now is helping then I say stick with it or research the injection and see if that’s something you’d prefer. Best of luck to you!

- Bonnie

#advice #bonnie #19f #depression #period #womens health #contraception

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prevsapphism · 6 years

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make chronically ill characters you tepid fools.

another Interesting thing i’ve noticed in my time on here in the rpc is that the rpc is mostly peopled by able-bodied characters. in my almost decade ( Lorge Yikes ) on this site, i’ve only seen two ( 2 ) Actually Disabled characters. in all of the hundreds of thousands that exist or have existed here. two. Count Them. Two.

i’ve also noticed, in fic, when characters are disabled, they usually seem to have their disabilities ignored or erased ( fanon alana bloom, anyone? she was pushed Fairly Violently out of a window? and most fanworks of her have her Completely Upright And Fine as though the injury were very minor and not. You Know. Life-Threatening? ) or, we serve as Inspiration or a Sad Pitiful Comparison to make Shiny Ablebodied people look better. ( looking at you, fanon charles xavier. ) if i didn’t know any better, it would seem as though the rpc is doesn’t want to write disabled characters because they find us repulsive, cumbersome and generally gross and undesirable.

but since so many of you don’t know what ableism is when it’s not right in front of you, i’m going to be nice, give you all the benefit of the doubt and show you how to write us better.

first of all, you, the presumably abled writer and / or character, need to heed these four ( 4 ) factors before i continue:

please remember your character is disabled. i can’t tell you how many times in fanwork that i’ve seen disability acknowledged once and never come up again, which is especially disrespectful to real live disabled people because we don’t get to forget. neither should you lmfao.

disabled characters are usually written with very little or no insight into the disability itself, which makes for a shit portrayal. this post should not be your only character building source for disability. as you should with every other foray into a subject you’re unfamiliar with, do ya research and do it thoroughly. i’m not saying look at medical textbooks five hours a day, but don’t just spend five minutes on webmd and then call it a night holy fuck.

if you have a Gasping Need to make your disabled character exist alongside an abled one and have them ( the abled character ) look better, do it, i suppose ( sarcasm, ) but think about where your decision for making them disabled comes from and why you want to do it.

don’t use person-first language. don’t use person-first language. don’t use person-first language. don’t use person-first language. don’t use person-first language. your character does not have a disability, ( ie they’re not a ‘person with ____,’ ) they are disabled. they are a disabled person. disabilities aren’t some Wicked Cool Limited Edition Skin you get in your Human Person Loot Box that you can take off whenever you want. they are very often integral parts of our identity and you demonstrate a very superficial knowledge of what disabilities actually are when you phrase them this way.

but queen morgaine, how am i going to make my disabled character good and compelling? fear not, reader-- here is a list of disability and chronic illness things you can and are encouraged to apply to your character to make them more realistic and nuanced!!!!!

able-bodied people can and are encouraged to reblog, other disabled people are enthusiastically encouraged to add on.

sleep. sleep is a very loaded subject in disability. a lot of us, like those with fibromyalgia or chronic fatigue, sleep a lot. being incapacitated by your own Flesh Enclosure all the time saps so much of your energy you Would Not Believe. we also very often do not feel Refreshed or Energised when we wake up because of our pre-existing conditions. we sometimes take naps in an attempt to assuage our fatigue, but they’re usually hit or miss-- i like to say that We Do Not Take Naps, Naps Take Us. on the other end of the scale, a lot of us don’t sleep at all or sleep very little because our disabilities keep us from falling asleep for long stretches, whether it be from being in pain, being sick, or being Overall Uncomfortable. here’s how this could look in your disabled character:

cancelling plans to take a nap or lie down.

leaving plans early to take a nap or lie down.

erratic fatigue-- not being tired when they should be ( ie in the middle of the night ) but being overwhelmingly tired the next day.

like i said, not feeling refreshed, or even more tired when they wake up.

feeling pain in their sleep.

sleeping an entire day or very long stretches.

being kept awake for long stretches by their illness.

physical aids. this isn’t a given for every disabled person, but i’m putting it here because characters that are disabled don’t often have them in fiction. for openers, they should absolutely be portrayed in a positive, or at the very least neutral light. most of us irl are happy to make our lives easier as much as we can, so it doesn’t make much sense to have them suck in fiction. ( except for . You Know. Ableism, but like i said. benefit of the doubt. ) a physical aid can be as simple as a fidget toy that keeps us grounded in our brainfog or something as complex and noticeable as a service dog or a wheelchair. here are some ideas:

Ever-Present water bottles and especially electrolyte drinks like gatorade, vitamin water and my Personal Favourite, sobe lifewater ( not sponsored. ) very useful for those of us with vitamin imbalances, or those of us with pots or vertigo that makes getting dehydrated very easy and very unpleasant.

also taking supplements in or with our food for these deficiencies.

canes!!!! canes!!!!! canes!!!! canes!!!!! especially on younger people!!!!! people under 40 use canes!!!!! give us cool canes!!!! give us canes that match what we’re wearing!!!! give us canes that fold up to fit in our bags that we carry round all the time!!!!! give us canes!!!!!

service dogs!!!!!

crutches!!!!!

meds we carry round all the time!!!!! i know very few chronically ill people that don’t take meds throughout the day or at least once!!!!!

also, if your character uses mobility / household aides or prostheses etc they'll need maintenance or replacing at some point! maybe even multiple points!

variability. chronic illness is an extremely mutable subject. this means a few things-- one, our range of ability, whether it be mental effort, physical limits or otherwise differs from day to day. sometimes even from hour to hour. two, our ‘okay’ or ‘personal best / Weekly High Score’ may not match up with your ( able-bodied ) ‘okay.’ your ‘did okay today’ may mean ‘went to class, did homework and tidied desk,’ but our ‘did okay today’ may mean ‘changed our clothes and / or took a shower’ or ‘ate [ a decent ] lunch.’ and that was The Most we accomplished all day. chronic illness saps all your energy and your motivation. this is especially important if your character is mentally ill as well. this also means that some of us can go out dancing one night when we were bedridden the day before, but going down a long flight of stairs the next day or earlier that day can be too much. anyway here’s how this can look:

like i said, getting excited about or talking about their Little Victories to other people-- how they ate breakfast, washed their clothes or hair, looked after their pet, and that was it. ( please congratulate us / them for these, by the way. it means a lot. )

being able to do one thing but not another, like being able to clean a set of dishes or walk a dog, but not being able to walk four blocks or clean a bathroom.

conversely, being fine earlier, but not being all right now-- like being pretty okay with walking four blocks, but feeling terrible an hour, or even ten minutes, after and being in too much pain to walk.

getting too hot and needing to go somewhere to cool down, or being really cold and needing a sweater within a very short time period.

being nauseous from not eating or drinking but being too nauseous to eat or drink.

new symptoms or issues popping up out of nowhere or periodically-- ‘oh shit, my hips are aching again. what have i done now.’ ‘great now i have headaches for some g-dforsaken reason. are you kidding i only get those when its cold.’ ‘uGh why the fuck am i shaking all over? i thought i stopped doing that!!!’

appearance. many of us have the energy to keep up with a personal style or Aesthetic. some of us don’t. this is kind of self explanatory, but here’s how it could look in your character:

wearing the Lowest Effort outfit-- a shirt, some leggings and a sweater.

wearing a Really Nice Outfit, but having their range of mobility for the day compromised due to having to set aside some energy to look nice.

not combing or brushing their hair.

messy living spaces. we don’t have the energy to be tidy all the time. we barely have the energy to get out of bed most of the time. your character should probably follow suit.

The Medical Debacle. doctors can often do chronically ill people more harm than good. a lot of us are treated as Medical Mysteries™ due to having rare illnesses or having symptoms that don’t make sense, whether it be because they conflict with other symptoms we have-- for example, it took, and is taking, ages for me to get a proper fibro diagnosis because i’m chronically anaemic and have a fluctuating but pervasive eating disorder as well, so it’s very hard for medical professionals to distinguish which illness is causing what. Or Something. also, a lot of our insurance companies may not cover certain procedures or meds, which we often learn by surprise when we go to get checked out or treated. doctors can deliberate on giving us a diagnosis when everything we’ve told them we have matches up with that illness because it doesn’t ~fit us~ or some bs as well. they will also suggest or prescribe things that we’ve already tried and don’t work ( i can’t tell you how many of my hypermobile friends have been told to try yoga. ) sometimes we have to Actively Battle for certain types of treatment or for a certain diagnosis. here are some more examples for characterisation.

health scares that end your character up in the hospital.

multiple urgent care, doctor or hospital visits.

having to fight for or argue with a doctor for a diagnosis.

The Hospital Smell. You Know The One. we have nightmares about this smell.

ambient Hospital Noise in a setting.

The Debt They’ll Rack Up for being in and out of the Medical Circut all the fuckening time if they don’t have good insurance. sometimes even if they do. Chronic Illness Is Magic.

your character’s meds getting switched round a lot while the doctors try to figure out what they have and their reaction to those meds.

getting annoyed with ( a ) doctor( s ) for not diagnosing them with something they know they have or not prescribing them a treatment they know they need.

your character getting an mri or some other screening / evaluation and getting a wrong diagnosis that’s much worse than or not enough for what they actually have.

your character not having a diagnosis at all or having their symptoms overlooked and being frustrated about it.

some nice touches you should also include in your characterisation:

please consider making your character the protagonist of their story. so often we are sidelined and eclipsed by abled characters, so it would be very much appreciated if we got to drive the narrative for once.

a lot of us are mentally ill as well-- i can’t think of a single one of my physically ill friends who isn’t neurodivergent too. please consider making your physically ill character mentally ill, or even autistic, in combination to their physical illness. a lot of us are also self-deprecating to cope with all that we go through every day, so a few jibes at themself every once in awhile is good to include in your character too.

disabled people date and fall in love. aro rep is well and good or whateva, but ( head )canoning a disabled character as aro is not at all revolutionary in any respect and it contributes to the Undesirable Cumbersome stereotype you want to stay away from.

Disabled People Have Sex. we often have to have sex Around our disabilities, ie circumvent them before, during and after sex, But We Have Sex. ace rep is well and good or whateva, but making a disabled character ace is not revolutionary and again, makes us look incapable of being worthy of sexual desire, as well as having pretty Nasty Implications overall. disabled. people. have. sex. i encourage you to make your disabled characters have sex.

don’t make your supernatural monster character disabled unless you make your monster’s disability and their Monsterhood mutually exclusive, and better yet don’t do it unless you have a good disabled character too. it reinforces the stigma that disabled people are to be ostracised and othered for something we can’t help. your monster is not a monster because they’re disabled, your monster is a monster because they eat people or whatever the fuck.

Anyway Thats It Bye send me an ask here or over at @trustawitch if you have any questions and @ me or send me an ask here or trustawitch if you end up making a disabled character! i’d love to see them!! xoxo

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mindfogandsleep · 7 years

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I have chronic fatigue as well. Do you have any tips on trying to manage it? I've done all the bs lifestyle changes, blah blah blah. But I would love to hear from someone who ACTUALLY has chronic fatigue. Any advice?

Advice for CFS sufferers from a CFS sufferer.

First things first I want to make it perfectly clear that everyone with CFS/ME is different and because of this things that work for me might not work for you or others. However, I’m going to give some advice based on things I do or things I wish I did.

Food and Drink

It is important to make sure you continue to eat and drink even when you are on your worst days. You may not feel a lot better when you’ve eaten but believe me you will feel worse if you do not eat. Food is important and so is hydration.

Microwave meals are a lifesaver. They may not be the most nutritious thing and they may not always be the nicest but it is always better to eat something than nothing. Microwave meals take next to no effort. Pull it out the freezer, pierce some plastic and away you go. And you can get such a variety of things. Please do not neglect your body.

If you do want to cook, be productive on your better days. Cook up things that you can freeze and come to easily. Things like tortilla based foods, pasta based meals, even rice can be cooked and frozen and recooked. This was pretty much what I lived on when I was at uni the first time because it saved so much energy which I rarely had at dinner time.

If you are in bed and struggling to get out keep a large drink by your bed. I have a cinema special edition cup that I got at a midnight screening once. It holds a litre and has a really long straw so I don’t have to worry about holding the heavy cup or even sitting up properly if you don’t want to or can’t. If you’re out and about carry a drink with you.

Coffee is useful but don’t rely on it too much. Coffee may give you an energy boost but most people even without a chronic illness feel a come down from coffee, imagine that come down with the addition of always being fatigued. I am guilty so much of over using coffee and it’s not good when the come down happens.

Clothes

It can be hard if you’re used to wearing clothes with a lot of buttons and zips and heals or what have you because dressing can be difficult and can take a lot of energy that you might not be able to spare. For me, hoodies, t-shirts and jogging bottoms are a must. They are easy to get in and out of and comfortable whether you are out and about or lounging inside.

The other thing is pyjamas. With CFS you’ll probably spend more time in your pyjamas that you did before you had CFS. Invest in cute pyjamas. Ones with your fandoms on or cute animals or whatever it is you’re into. If you’re in Britain Primark is great for cute pjs, I love them because they’re so cheap. Continuing the pj theme, you need to have pjs for warm and cold weather or warm and cold you. Sometimes it’s like 25oc outside and you will be freezing, sometimes it’s -5 and you’ll be boiling, so bear in mind that the temperature outside doesn’t necessarily correlate to the temperature of you. Fluffy socks are great too.

Personal Care.

If you have a bath and a shower at home, find out which you find easiest and do that. I personally find showering easier because while standing for long periods is difficult, I find that baths cause me to go lightheaded and feel really off. It is okay to go a few extra days without bathing/showering than you normally would. You may feel kinda off because of it but it’s not the end of the world and resting up is definitely more important than washing your hair.

On the subject of washing your hair, invest in dry shampoo. I’ve not used it but I’ve heard a lot of other spoonies talking about it and how useful it can be. If you’re struggling to bathe or shower but you want to do something, things like strip washing while sat on the toilet seat can be really helpful as well.

Mobility and Life Aids.

This is a really big one: Do not be afraid to use aids. Do not be afraid or ashamed to use anything that might help you. Whether this is a walking stick, a wheelchair or anything else, you are allowed to use it. You are disabled enough, you are ill enough. I’ve known people with chronic illnesses who have been afraid to get mobility aids because they are young, because people are more ill than you or whatever reason. It’s bullshit, okay. I don’t care if people think you don’t need it. If you feel like you need it and it will help you then you have every right to get it.

I don’t use a great amount of mobility aids but I have recently brought a walking stick and it has honestly made the world of difference for me. It’s lengthened how long I can walk for, how long I can be upright, how I can be out. I put off getting it for a long time for the reason above and it’s stupid because it helps. If you can be helped by getting one, do so.

This goes for everything. This does for anything that can help you. Things that are generally advertised towards older people are not solely for them. You are never too young for an illness, you are never too young to need something.

Entertainment

This is a bit of a lighter note but when you’re in a place where you can’t go out or you can’t go out for very long, life can get really really boring. If you don’t have the energy to do a lot you need to find things that you can do will you are stuck at home. I have a few things to recommend but there really whatever you can manage is great

1. Netflix. TV and DVDs are great but Netflix is a life saver for me. There is a lot more on there, it’s very easy to find something new to watch whatever mood you are in.

2. Audiobooks. Getting a subscription to Audible was a wonderful decision for me. I love reading so much but I don’t always have the energy to follow the words or even hold a book, so having an audiobook means I can still get the entertainment of books without having to put so much of the effort into it.

3. Crafts. If you’re able to do things with your arms without getting achy, I definitely recommend some sort of craft. I make things out of felt, but drawing, sewing, decoupage, writing, colouring books, anything really to keep your brain stimulated.

4. Phone Games. You have next to no energy but you’re too awake to actually sleep, phone games are wonderful. They take little energy and little concentration.

5. The Internet. I wish I had known how great the internet is for spoonies when I was first diagnosed. God, it is wonderful.

Like I said, there are more, there are so many more. These are just a few I use.

Medication and the Medical Profession

Every spoonie to ever spoon knows that the medical profession is an endless cause of frustration. You’ll regularly go to your doctors and be told that you just need to pace yourself or that it’s mental health related or this or that and what they are really saying underneath all of this is ‘we know jack shit about this illness’. It is important to find a doctor who believes you, unfortunately there are still a large number of medical professionals who don’t believe in CFS and it fucking sucks. Find a doctor who believes you, who listens to you and who at least tries to help even when there isn’t anything they can do. You have every right to change doctors if the one you had is more harming than helping. Remember that.

Get doctors to check for other things. Don’t allow them to put everything down to the CFS. A lot of the time it will be. A lot of the time you will find that there is not logical explanation and you’re going to have to get used to that. But sometimes there will be other things as well. I was anaemic while also having CFS and iron tablets made the world of difference to me. I was on iron tablets for two years and my iron has finally normalised.

If you suffer from brain fog, before going to the doctors make a note of what you wanted to talk about. It can be in depth or it can literally just be bullet points to trigger your memory when you get there. If you are worried you’re going to forget what the doctor has said to you, ask them to write some things down for you. They should be willing to do so.

If you have medication, do whatever it takes to remember to actually take it when you’re supposed to. I use a pill organiser so I know whether or not I have taken them each night. I find I have to check twice that I have filled it properly, brain fog can honestly be a problem with this. But pill organisers are definitely useful. Alarms are another thing that is useful. If you have to take something the same time each day set an alarm that says ‘tablets’ or something like that so you remember it.

Painkillers are your friend. See if you can get them on a prescription because you will probably end up taking them regularly. You will often find that they don’t help or only scratch the survive of the pain, but believe me it is better than nothing at all.

I hugely recommend keeping certain things in your house. I have a drawer of my bedside cabinet that has my prescriptions and other related things in it. Keep in painkillers, heat pads, cool pads, a first aid kit, lip balm, and probably some other things that I can’t think of right now.

Emotions

Having an illness like CFS messes with your mentally as well as physically. This is partly because of the effects of the actual symptoms and partly because of other people’s reaction to you. People suck when it comes to illnesses and disabilities. Being diagnosed with CFS is a life sentence that often comes along with losing friends and family members, it often means having to stop studying or stop working. It is a complete shape up of your life. It’s the knowledge that this may or may not get better and if it gets better again it may just as tell get worse again.

Whatever you are feeling is okay. You are allowed to be angry, you are allowed to sad, you’re allowed to be frustrated. There is no correct way to feel about your illness or the way you are being treated because of it. You are not doing anything wrong if you’re so angry you just want to scream at everyone. You are not doing anything wrong if you just want to cry and cry. People will spout a load of shit about positive thinking but it is unhealthy to be positive all the time and if you are upset or angry or whatever you are allowed to be. Don’t let anyone tell you that you shouldn’t be feeling that way.

Out and About

You are likely to miscalculate the number of spoons you have. This can go either way but you are very much more likely to overestimate. Don’t let your illness stop you from doing things if you feel like you can do them. But on the flip side don’t do things when you are too ill because you feel like you should be. Sometimes you will go out thinking you can deal with a day of action and you after a couple of hours you will find that you actually you really don’t. It is hard, almost impossible to properly calculate spoons.

1. Take your Mobility Aids. There is a change you won’t need it but it is 100% better to carry it with you and not need it than to need it and not have it with you.

2. Rest along the way if you need to. Whether this is leaning against a shop window because holy hell suddenly the world is spinning to fast, whether it’s stopping by a café because getting a drink and/or a snack will give you an excuse to sit down for, well, as long as you need really, or whatever it is but listen to your body and give it the rests it needs.

3. If you need to leave something early do so. Is it frustrating? Does it make you feel anti-social and boring? Yes and yes. But if you cannot manage what you have organised even if you are part way through it and you need to leave do so.

4. Have a back-up plan for getting home. Now this is something I don’t do and really wish I did. Say one of your friends is the designated driver and you are on a day out and suddenly you don’t have the energy to go on but you also don’t want to ruin the rest of your friends’ day. Have another way to get home: someone who can pick you up, public transport, whatever but have a way.

Other People

People can suck. We all know this anyone but having an illness like CFS you learn a whole new way in which people suck. And you learn, sometimes, that it’s not stranger that suck all the time, sometimes it’s your closest friends. I’m very lucky now because I have friends who do their utmost to understand and help in any way that they can but I haven’t always been so lucky. I was thirteen when I was diagnosed and I was off school was seven weeks before any of my friends got in contact with me. People don’t always bother with people who aren’t around anymore and it’s really sucky but it happens. It hurts, it hurts a lot, but I promise you there are better people out there. You will find people who care about you whether you are healthy or ill or whatever else.

Family and friends won’t always believe you. People will make comments about how you are exaggerating, how you are lazy, how you need to just push through. They will tell you’re making their life difficult because of your illness, etc, etc. There is no end to abled-peoples insensitive comments. I’m sorry but the only thing you can really do here is learn to let it go over your head. It will take time but eventually you’ll learn that you are the one in your body, you are the one who know what its really like and that you are not a burden, you are not a problem, you’re just a person who is ill.

Everyone and their aunt has a ‘cure’ for you. Everyone knows someone who suffered from it and if you just ‘try yoga’, ‘cut out gluten’, ‘change your diet’ you will be better again. It’s bullshit. It is a chronic illness and chronic illnesses mean there is not a cure. People are insensitive as I have said. Ignore them the best you can and focus on the things that you know to help or hinder. Once again, you are the one in your body after all.

Self-Care.

This is probably the most important part of all of this and it encompasses pretty much all of the headings. Looking after yourself is the most important thing. You need to put yourself first, you need to make sure you are doing everything you can for your health, for your well-being. If this means sometimes you just put on clean pjs and go back to bed, then you do that. If this means laying in a bath until the water is almost cold, do it. If it means lying on the sofa with a blanket and a teddy and a cup of tea do it. If it means pushing yourself a bit too much one day and dealing with the consequences for a week then do it. You deserve to put yourself first!

There is probably a lot more I could say but I think this is long enough already. I really hope this helps lovely and that it wasn’t too intense to read. If you want me to talk about any specific subject either in more detail or something that I haven’t touched on at all please feel free to message me again. Hope you’re having a less than terrible day. Love and spoons. xxx

#chronic fatigue syndrome #chronic fatigue #chronic illness #mecfs #cfsme #mine #my writing #Anonymous #Josie makes things

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