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queenbeean · 3 years

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forbidden / dark!nomad!steve rogers

part two

warnings: this is a dark fic, please don’t interact if you are a minor and/or if you are uncomfortable with dark themes, this contains smut, oral, prostitution, dark language

author’s note: there will be mistakes, this is not edited

pairing: dark!nomad!steve rogers x f!reader; a bit of dark!bucky barnes x f!reader; featuring tfatws character

part one

Steve grinned at the way your cunt squeezed his finger at hearing the news of your new life. “Relax, doll.” A whimper left your lips at the depth of his voice. “Look at me.”

You did. Your eyes easily found his and you gulped. “Y-yes, S-Sir.”

Holding his gaze started being a difficult task as he swiftly inserted one more finger. The stretch was delicious instead of painful like you feared. Your fingers were probably half the size of his and if anything, you were only able to fit two through your tight channel.

Steve moved his fingers a tad faster when a muffled moan escaped your lips. “You have played with yourself, haven’t you?”

At hearing his question, you tried closing your legs. It was not an everyday occurrence to be fingered by your new boss and being questioned about your privacy and intimacy. Steve caught your legs and pushed them apart with his free hand. As punishment, he used his thumb to rub your clit, first in a gentle manner. As he expected, your inner walls fluttered at the new sensation, making his fingers struggle to move as fast as he was.

“S-sir, please...”

“Tell me, Y/N. Do you like playing with your clit?” He touched your bundle of nerves and swirled, loving the way you whimpered, whined and writhed. “What about playing with your nipples?” His hand left your clit and dragged it underneath your dress all the way up to where one of your tits was about to spill out. Immediately, he tugged the bud. One of your hands flew to where his was while the other grabbed onto the lone tit. “Take them out, honey. I want to spill myself on them after I make you come.” You obeyed him right away. Carefully, you moved the thin straps off your shoulders and you helped your mounds out of their confinement.

“Sir, I’m c-close.” His fingers were still going as fast as they could. Steve was surprised that despite the squelching noises your cunt produced, he was having a hard time dragging his fingers. And he only had two inside.

“Y/N, if you want me to let you come, I’m going to need answers.” His voice was strict but due to how high on the sensation you were, it took you a while. “Now.”

A small whimper left your lips before answering. “I’ve only come by touching my c-clit.” A moan escaped. “My fingers are... are... are too small s-so I’ve only tried o-once, Sir.”

Steve smiled at your helplessness. He liked them like you. At his mercy. “What about someone else? Have you let somebody else touch your private parts?” Even Steve smirked at the irony of his words but somehow the thought of someone else breaking you like he was at that exact moment didn’t sit well with him.

“One man tried but I changed my mind.”

As soon as your words were out, he attached his lips to your clit, making a strangled moan leave your mouth. And you came in seconds. The feeling of his tongue on your bundle would be something to remember whenever your body was working.

Steve was able to prolong the orgasm that had you spasming moments later. You felt dizzy but most importantly empty as he took his fingers out and spread your wetness against your lips. Before you could taste yourself subconsciously, his plump lips attacked yours. You felt his tongue swirling against your lips and tongue, your essence was like water on desert and all you could do was moan.

“On your knees, doll.”

You obeyed right away after he helped your legs off the stirrups. Steve struggled to get his pants open. The sight of you kneeling, tits out and dazed expression, patiently waiting for his cock had him leaking already. Moments like these made him grateful for the supersoldier serum but also disappointed because women could only handle so much.

Steve sighed in relief when his cock sprang free. He fisted and slapped your cheek with it. He smiled when you opened your mouth without being asked to. A deep groan escaped him and you felt it in your mouth besides the heavy weight of his flesh on your tongue.

“A virgin with blowjob experience?” He wondered.

You grabbed onto his shaft and stroked it while you took a deep breath and answered.

“Is that a bad thing?” You genuinely asked.

“Not at all, doll, as long as I’m your first.” Steve groaned. “I am your first, right?” You paused. “Y/N?”

You looked down in shame. “Two guys blackmailed me into giving them blowjobs. I’m sorry.”

Steve sighed, thinking of tracking those two idiots and killing them. “Don’t be sorry, I’ll handle it. Now, relax your jaw, I’m going to fuck your mouth.” Your eyes widened as he went back inside your mouth. You choked a bit as you tried keeping up with his thrusts. “Play with my balls, doll.” You tried focusing on his voice and started massaging his sack which surprisingly was heavier than it looked.

Steve sped up and moaned out loud. You were about to tap his thigh, hoping for some air when he pulled out of you. His free hand grabbed your arm and made you kneel higher as his other hand continued stroking his cock.

“Was I bad, Sir?”

“Oh, fuck.” Your question had Steve rushing to dump his load all over your tits. Supersoldier cum was thicker than normal and had him produce at least three times the normal amount. Your tits were completely covered by the time he finished coming. “You were good, doll. Now pull up your dress, I want to show you around.”

There was an understanding that you wouldn’t be able to clean up yourself. Not his cum from your tits and not your juices from your pussy which felt sticky and made a sound as you followed him.

Steve opened a different door from the previous one and strobing lights and loud music attacked your senses. You shivered once the cooler air hit you. The wetness from your tits and the way his cum ran down the valley of your breasts was now the last of your concerns. He grabbed your hand and pulled you close. You made sure to keep your gaze down, something Marina had told you beforehand.

“Pay attention, doll.” Steve said. “After me and my pals welcome you in, you’ll begin dance lessons. Whatever you make on stage is yours to keep.” You swallowed and made yourself stay focused. There was a lot going on around you. Men talking to barely-dressed women as they either enjoyed their drink or grope them. Or both. The stage that was made of tiny stages in an L shape next to the entrance and the offices you had just been. On the other end of the stages, a huge bar. You squinted to see what was next to it. It seemed like a labyrinth and you assumed that where the stairs were, leading to the second floor where fancier men were lounging. “The bar is for customers only. If you are thirsty, you can take a small break in the dressing room. Now, come on.” He walked in front of you and as much as you wanted to be invisible, it seemed like the spotlight had switched to you.

The Boss was a big man, wide shoulders and tall. Every head turned to him as he walked. He’d wave at a few people, but most just let him walk. Not your case, as soon as he walked by, all male gazes were on you. You swallowed thickly as you heard a bunch of fresh meat and can’t wait for her to be on the floor. You focused your eyes on the Boss’s back and noticed how his hands were in tight fists. So tight you were scared he would lose circulation because of how white they were. You were so focused on his tense figure that you almost ran into his strong back.

“Good night, Sir.” You heard a sultry voice coming from in front the Boss.

“Lorraine.” Steve continued walking, the blonde girl walking next to him now. “Shouldn’t you be up there?”

“I was but Mr. Barnes wanted to introduce a new girl.” The woman, Lorraine, answered bitterly. “Maybe I can entertain you tonight, Sir?” She stopped in front of him and got incredibly close to the Boss and you couldn’t help but look away when she took his hand and placed it underneath her dress, on her naked ass cheek.

Steve squeezed and smiled approvingly. “Maybe some other time. I’m busy right now.” With his clean hand, he grabbed yours and led you inside the labyrinth room. Inside the hallway, there were a bunch of doors with numbers outside them. “These are the private rooms. When a client requests you, this is where you’ll entertain them. But, Y/N, you better not think of getting attached to the clients. It’s forbidden. This is all business and I’ll know if you break that rule. Understood?”

His grip on your hand got a little strong but regardless, you nodded. “Yes, Sir.”

“Good girl.” Instead of going down the hall, he turned right to where the stairs you thought of were. “Up here, we have the VIP section. Private lounges and private rooms. Now listen, you are not to come up here unless you are solicited. These are very, very important people and you don’t want to know what happens if you bother someone from up here. Got it?”

“Yes, Sir.”

“This will be the only time you come here without being requested because I’m bringing you.” He started walking and the security outside every curtain-divided lounge, greeted him before moving the almost see-through material.

Steve took you to five of the lounges. The men inside were all appreciative of you and promised to come back to you once you were ready.

The rest were in use so they couldn’t be interrupted. And finally, the Boss took you to the last one where Mr. Barnes was in with another man wearing an expensive-looking leather coat. The man Roman was now outside.

“Oh, Mr. R, we’ve been waiting for you to join us.” The man said in a thick german accent while looking towards a red-cheeked Buck.

“Excuse me, Baron. I’ve been showing Y/N around. You know how it is.” The Boss responded. “Have you been treated well tonight?”

“Service is excellent where there’s new assets.” The Baron responded, slightly tilting his head to the quiet man next to him. “When is this beautiful asset going to be available for service?” The Baron asked while looking at you.

The Boss took a seat opposite Buck and next to the Baron. “Come here, darling.” He patted his thigh and you immediately took a seat. “I was thinking in three day’s time. She’s a virgin so we got to make sure that she’s well prepared.”

“I understand.” Buck made a grunting noise and brought his hands to his crotch. “This one is really good at handjobs. And now that Mr. Barnes is done with her, I’ll be going to a private room.”

Your eyes widened when you saw Marina get up from underneath the table. The Baron offered her his hand and helped her up before retreating.

“Y/N?” The Boss’s voice snapped you out of it. “Get up on here, doll.”

“On the table, Sir?”

Steve loved the way you always called him Sir. A perfect little doll. “Yes, doll. Bucky and I will be checking your sensitive spots now. Especially how your body reacts to being to being exposed in a public area.” Carefully, the man you were sitting on helped you up. “Take your gown off.”

Slowly, you got on your knees and started stripping. Your boobs felt stiff as you moved around, the dried cum itching in a pleasant way against your nipples. Once it was off, you tried covering your naked body out of habit but Steve was quick to take it from you.

“Couldn’t even clean her?” Bucky snickered.

“So she doesn’t forget who she belongs to.” Steve smiled. “Isn’t that right, darling?” You nodded, still self conscious of being naked in front of two very handsome and strong men. “Very well. Now on your knees and hands and bring your pussy close to the edge of the table.” He told you as both men moved around for better view. “Roman,” The security man peeked inside and you tried closing your legs and hiding your breasts. “Please bring some lube and a few drinks.” You closed your eyes as he briefly looked at your body.

“Yes, boss.”

“Okay, Y/N, we will be testing how much you can last and handle while being on your knees.” And then you felt two different hands spreading your pussy.

part three

#steve rogers x reader #dark steve rogers #steve rogers#mine #chris evans x reader #chris evans

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doorsclosingslowly · 3 years

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It's a False Start And Not an Ending

When Pekka Rollins comes to intimidate the Brekker kid out of taking the Dreesen job, he doesn’t pull the boy’s head closer with the cane. He uses his hand.

2.4k | S1E02 AU

It goes like this: the same way it’s gone hundreds of times, over tens of years, with so many idiot men. “Evening, Mr… Brekker, is it?” Pekka says, sitting down on Brekker’s office chair. A formality. Ketterdam would not belong to the Dime Lions if he didn’t keep his eyes on its hungry little tadpoles. As squabbling tadpoles who bite off far too much to chew go, this isn’t the smallest one by far, though neither is it that impressive. A lieutenant from a weak, but ascendant gang. Brekker fancies himself somewhat of a rival to Pekka, apparently: like a midge he’s been minorly foiling some of Pekka’s business ventures for several years now, and it’s time he was warned off the habit. Dreesen’s mysterious plan is just the opportunity Pekka’s been waiting for: lucrative enough to pique both their interests, but so vague it’s probably a hoax, not worth Pekka’s time except as a pretext to see whether Brekker can learn to do as he’s told.

He stays on his knees, at least. Not that he can do much more, when Ole has a fist in the back of his stupidly pretentious vest and is holding him down. Maybe it’s sinking in, how pathetic his pretence at rivalry was: Pekka brought no Lions but Ole and Barend with him, and yet he entered the boy’s territory, his prized little club, and has him cowering on the floor of his own office. No resistance, no fuss.

Whether Brekker’s bright enough to give up, though, is hard to tell. He’s snarling down on the floor, pretending that the question of whether or not the Orchid is Dime Lions’ turf matters at all when he took its Heartrender expressly to cross Pekka’s plans.

Brekker struggles, but he doesn’t break Ole’s iron grip on the back of his vest. He talks back, when Pekka tells him to walk away from Dreesen’s offer, and so Pekka bends closer to the brat. Barend passes him Brekker’s crow-head cane—stupid affectation, heavier than necessary, a concealed weapon though an unwieldy one—and Pekka throws it onto the desk. It knocks a few papers to the floor and then it tips over, too, clattering somewhere out of view. Brekker’s head moves as if to follow it, but he’s still caught tight in Ole’s hands.

He still hasn’t grasped the true situation.

Pekka slides his hand down the boy’s sharp cheekbone and under his throat. He presses down on his laryngeal muscles and then digs his middle and ring finger into the soft tissue between Brekker’s mandible bones to tilt his head up, as far as it can physically go.

Air whooshes in and out of Brekker’s slightly open mouth. Good. Perhaps he’s ready to listen, then, but he doesn’t reply when Pekka tells him he’ll cave in his skull unless the sprog stops interfering in Pekka’s plans.

He doesn’t reply when Pekka trails his fingers inside his lower lip and when he grabs his jaw, slime trails of spit at the side of his mouth, and pushes Brekker’s head down and up and down again in a parody of acquiescence.

Kaz Brekker is too busy crying.

Who knew it was so easy? The upstart lieutenant of the Dregs, midnight midge buzzing in Pekka’s bedroom, brought to glassy-eyed snotty tears by the simplest threat of physical violence. Brekker’s begging, almost incoherently, for something called Jordie. He’s telling Pekka that he isn’t dead. Well. Not yet.

“Not if you do as you’re told,” Pekka says.

The upstart lieutenant of the Dregs is just a sobbing little boy, after all. So it goes.

It goes like this: Inej knocked back his shot and then she left for the Menagerie. Jesper’s still at the bar. He just received his replacement drink, and he’s bored. Miserably bored: that sounds much better than worried out of his mind about whatever Heleen has in store for Inej—why call on her on the eve before Kaz wants them to travel to Ravka with no plan or means of success but the boss’ untransparent rivalry with Pekka Rollins—why call on her at all—and what the fuck is Kaz planning? Jesper wants to gamble. That’s what he does when he’s bored. Worried. Terrified. Kaz will give him a tongue-lashing for getting in trouble on the eve before they leave for Ravka with no plan or means of success, though, and Inej’s left for the Menagerie and Jesper’s probably supposed to think of—something. He’s bored, though. Worried. He’ll just make his restlessness Kaz’ problem, then.

It goes like this: the bullet leaves its barrel at a velocity of around two-hundred-and-fifty-six meters per second. This is less than the speed of sound, and so Pekka Rollins hears the explosion before he is hit, though only just, and with not enough time to turn around and face his murderer. The bullet slides past the hair on the back of his head—he’s taken off his hat after all, though that would not have been much of a barrier—and past the skin and the muscle. It smashes into one of the cranial bones that until now, has kept the vicious mind of the King of the Barrel safe to pursue power and family and wealth. No longer, though: a small circle from the calcium, phosphorus, sodium and collagen case turns into shrapnel. Left behind is a hole.

The bullet travels through the brain at a speed faster than the one at which tissues tear. Connective bits and fibrous membranes, cerebrospinal fluid, neuronal cell bodies, dendrites, unmyelinated axons, astrocytes, oligodendrocytes, synapses, and capillaries… everything is pushed out of the way, stretching the tender connections that make Pekka Rollins who he is far beyond their breaking points. In the wake of the bullet remains a long cavity: but it doesn’t take long until everything snaps back into the hole, knocking together and finding new arrangements, filling the chasm without any gap and yet: without any life.

There is a wound in the forehead of the sack of meat that used to house the dreams and ambitions and cruelties of Pekka Rollins, but it’s not an exit. The bullet, by this point, lacked the velocity with which to free itself, and only knocked loose a piece of bone from the scalp. So it goes.

It goes like this: Kaz Rietveld has seen the men who tend to the Reaper’s Barge. They come and go, every day, sometimes twice. They patrol. They shout. The bodymen, the stadwatch—he knows to watch for them. Jordie told him to duck down and hide, when they’re coming, because no-one is allowed to be outside. That’s just another one of those rules no-one believes in, because of course everyone is still outside, except for those who don’t have to, and Kaz and Jordie could have belonged to that group except the money’s gone. The money’s gone, and Jordie told him to hide from the bodymen.

Kaz tried. He doesn’t know how he ended up here. He was so hot and he went to sleep, and now he’s here with the bodymen. They’re inspecting his face, pushing it up with their hands—they wouldn’t, the plague’s infectious—they’re pushing his face up and they look at him and they put him onto the barge.

They pushed his face up. They should have seen. “I’m not dead,” Kaz tries to protest, but his chest is so tight only a wheeze gets out. “I’m not dead.”

No-one reacts. Maybe Kaz only imagined moving his lips. Maybe he can’t anymore. Maybe they’re right.

The ground doesn’t move but suddenly he’s up on the Barge, still kneeling. Still not dead, he tries to say, “Not dead, please don’t burn me, Papa, Jordie, please, help,” but no-one comes. No-one reacts, except for the woman next to him. Putrid fluid leaks from her nostrils and mouth, dripping, dripping onto her neck. Her stomach’s bloated. Something moves inside her. Kaz tries to crawl away with his not-dead legs and his wheezing empty lungs and his foot hits her arm and the skin slips and sloughs—no, that’s fabric—and he’s looking straight ahead at Jordie’s rigid dead grin, at Jordie with his tongue lolling out who begs, “Kaz, boss, tell me what—” and he’s in the water half-trying to climb onto Jordie’s rigid grinning body and the skin of his back sloughs off and, “Kaz, you’re safe, you’re safe,” Jordie says, “you’re safe, you’re safe, you’re safe.”

It goes like this: Inej would have asked Jesper, but she couldn’t find him anywhere. Not at any of the tables in the Crow Club, and not losing his money anywhere else in the Barrel, either. She’d have asked Jesper, but even with his help… she would have been kidding herself. Murder is murder. Freedom is freedom. The small lodging house room is exactly where Tante Heleen told her it would be. The man is inside, like Tante Heleen said. There is no proof the man is what Tante Heleen said he was, and he invokes the Saints, but freedom is freedom. This city was always going to take everything: and righteousness is just one more thing to lose. She didn’t lose all her self-regard in the Menagerie: but she will have to give it up, now, to escape. There’s no-one to stop her. So it goes.

It goes like this: there are three corpses inside Kaz’ office. None of them are Kaz, though, which is the only thing that Jesper cares about. The boss isn’t doing well. Jesper’s kneeling right in front of him, half atop one of the corpses—the one who seemed to be the one actively torturing, and when Jesper got through the door and saw Kaz on his knees crying and begging he thought—well, Saints willing he’ll never have to say it out loud, it’s bad enough that Inej—at least there doesn’t seem to be any semen coating—well, anyway, speculating won’t help. Jesper doesn’t actually know what will help. Touching won’t, probably, but Kaz seems so muddled up he could actually lose his balance, so Jesper’s holding out both of his hands at a safe distance from Kaz’ shoulders so he can cushion a possible fall while he reassures him, over and over, “You’re safe now, boss.” Kaz can tear him a new asshole for coddling him later.

Fuck, Jesper hopes he will.

It sounds gnarly as all hell, whatever dream he’s stuck in right now. “I’m not dead, Jordie,” he’s pleading. “Jordie, I’m not dead.”

Fuck.

This is so far above Jesper’s pay grade or skill. Above Kaz’ level of trust. Kaz has never mentioned anything about his past, never shared who this ‘Jordie’ is, and now he’s freaking out and all Jesper can do is tell him, “Yeah boss, you aren’t dead, you’re safe, you’re safe, you’re Kaz fucking Brekker.”

“Don’t burn me.”

Fuck.

Jesper’s totally hoarse and not really paying attention to anything but the slight wobbling of Kaz’ shoulders—though not so much Jesper has to brace him, thank fuck—and so he almost flinches out of his skin when the Jordies turn into a tiny “Jes?”

“Boss? No-one’s been in here but me, you’re fine, you’re fine,” Jesper babbles, and Kaz has to glare at Jesper’s hands before he pulls them away, so Kaz can lean sideways against his desk.

Kaz takes a few deep gulps of air before he rasps, voice hoarser than usual, “Where’s Pekka Rollins?”

“Uh…” Jesper glances at the corpse behind him—one of Pekka’s guys—and then down at the carcass he’s sitting on. Bingo. He points down with both index fingers.

“You shot Pekka Rollins, Jesper.”

“In my defence, I only saw the back of the head of a man who was menacing you?”

“You shot Pekka.” Kaz drags a hand through his floppy hair. “You shot the leader of the Dime Lions. The King of the Barrel. You shot him.”

“We were planning on killing him eventually, right, boss?”

Kaz massages his forehead. Probably signalling to Jesper, your ignorance is giving me a headache. He pulls himself upright using the desk, while Jesper carefully doesn’t watch him. He searches for Kaz’ cane instead, even though he’s probably still too rattled to walk around. That’s something Kaz won’t admit, and so Jesper just happens to push a chair in position behind Kaz before he passes over the cane.

A glare is all the thanks he gets, but Kaz does sit down.

“We’re nixing the Dreesen job. This mess you got us into is much, much bigger,” Kaz rasps. “We’ve got a chance to take a big bite out of Dime Lions’ territory before they notice their boss is dead. Get in early for the brutal turf war that’s coming. Go get some men. You need to bring these bodies to the Reaper’s Barge. Quietly.”

Jesper nods sharply and picks his guns up before he walks out of the door.

There’s nothing he wants more than asking Kaz who Jordie is, where he went just now, what happened, and maybe Kaz would have still been jumbled enough to tell him, but. Jesper just killed the King of the Barrel.

Ketterdam’s underworld is going to erupt in the bloodiest war for Rollins’ succession any second now, and if Jesper wants Kaz and Inej and himself and the other Dregs to make it through alive—and there’s nothing he wants more—he has to let Kaz rebuild his shell. His armour. Maybe Kaz will tell him about Jordie, or maybe he won’t, but either way: it’s Jesper’s job to keep him safe. Whatever the cost. So it goes.

It goes like this: Dreesen waits impatiently for three days. Neither the Dime Lions nor the Dregs return to his mansion, and the Razorgulls don’t respond to his note, either. The Liddies do, but have no way of traversing the Fold: and so, disgruntled, Dreesen takes their offer, unaware they’re sending five of their least reliable members. The rest—and Dreesen will never find out, because he dies before the battles truly flare up—the rest are needed for the hot war Ketterdam’s gangs fight for the weakened Dime Lions’ territory. A million kruge is nothing compared to control over the Kerch crown jewel of crime, not that five more Liddies would have averted their gang's fate.

The five Liddies in question don’t make it to the Little Palace. When they arrive in Novokribirsk, the city is in ruins. The heartless expansion of the Fold is enough to shock petty Ketterdam criminals, and when Aafje and her crew meet a woman in a blue kefta who seems to know what she’s doing, they offer their help.

Alina Starkov still escapes the Little Palace during the Winter Fete.

Life goes on.

#kaz brekker #jesper fahey #dimtraces makes things #shadow and bone #shadow & bone

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subsequentibis · 3 years

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this is a DELIGHT to read, thank you so much for submitting it!! publishing for the aforementioned class, everyone pls take notes. p.s. i do have a wheelbarrow in my garage so if you ever need to transport sixteen stone of injured sea captain hit me up

-ibis

hello, i’m fairly sure you know exactly which silly person is writing this at this point. yes, it’s me again. i really truly hope that this works and doesn’t do a weird thing, i’m a tiny bit alarmed about doing this. i am a tiny nervous horse when it comes to internet stuff and i’ve attempted to proofread this maybe three times in order to put off actually sending this to you. i guess i’m just going to have to get this over with, so here are my debatably comprehendable ideas, mostly exactly as they were written in yesterday’s four-hour spiral of madness.

breaking news: local goof observes a tumblr post and proceeds to attempt to hack reality in order to see if they could in theory achieve this. am i ready to haul nearly six feet of incapacitated and extremely thick local captain to the nearest medical facility? part of me says no, part of me says hell yeah. let’s go find out.

okay, what do i get and what skills do i have. (time to invent some rules for this strange game and figure out just what i’d do. focusing on stephen and jack because they were the two characters you mentioned, this could probably apply to other characters but i’m going to only reckon with these as this project is strange enough as it currently stands. i’m expecting this to quickly go off the rails.) (note as i edit this over: this is extremely chaotic and you should be warned. i thought way too much about this and it shows, and it kind of terrifies me, not only because of the baffling sentence structures (or lack thereof). rereading this after having properly eaten and communicated with human beings for the day has shown me that i sound like an alien for much of this. terribly sorry to sound like an alien, swear i’m human and just kind of a bit strange inside.)

so: i can have anything currently on the property where i currently reside (garage and driveway included) and all my real skills.

i cannot drive because:

i do not have the physical ability to drive

i do not have the legal ability to drive

i can’t get help from any other person: this is an imaginary situation where exists in this house just me and a fictional lad who needs to be got to a local medical facility. (this is a very weird imaginary situation but honestly the peak of my own interests colliding.)

so what do i have here anyway (all of this is written assuming i personally am the one having to do this and am moving one of them from my place of residence to the nearest medical facility):

arms: not very strong (could potentially lift stephen since i can lift some of my friends and he’s both shorter and thinner, definitely cannot move jack an inch)

legs: i assume walking is not an option for reasons of either necessary speed of delivery or actually he cannot walk. oh yeah and also reasons of narrative whatever. continuing.

cars: cannot and will not drive, he is from the 1800s and cannot drive either, or in the case of stephen even if he could drive should not be trusted behind the wheel even in the peak of health. anyway given this vague situation we none of us should be driving.

bikes (various): i’m a fairly good biker, i’ve got pretty good stamina and can haul rather well on my own bike. with a little work (as seen in yon post) might be able to even sort of rig something up to perch stephen on my handlebars. this will not function with jack. *with a great deal of effort i drag him onto the front of the bike, wait a beat, then watch in horror as the bike tips back wheel up and dumps him back on the floor with an unpleasant thud* so that’s not going to work.

wheelbarrow: very cool and possibly functional plan. unfortunately we do not have a wheelbarrow. alas.

wagon: pros and cons. pro: we can haul the boy in this. con: we have to haul the boy. the boy can fit in this in a balanced manner, but let me restate: my arms are not very strong and jack is near six feet of unhelpful heavy meat. as usual this is more of a viable option for stephen. but god jack is just a big dense boy and i’m just a wobbly little person with noodles for arms.

alright. local noodle-armed goof is trying some new approaches regarding wagon/bikes: using my dad’s old bike with the board on the back and sort of tying him on there somehow so he faces backwards and sort of leans on me. he could even put his feet in the little saddlebag things for balance! although again i’d be worried about the sheer weight and size if i’m basically just dragging this man like a deceased sack of meat all the way to the hospital. so that depends. one more for the list of could potentially work with stephen. (although if he was anything less than utterly out i would have zero luck getting either of them to take part in any of these increasingly ridiculous plans.) (actually, depending on the situation it might work out if he was in a certain mood? anyhow, did not come here for these considerations. only for increasingly less reasonable methods of transportation.)

okay forging boldly onward. if i don’t want to try to do a huge hill with the wagon and my little noodle arms and hundreds-odd pounds of floppy boat lad i could try to rig up something where i tie the wagon to the back of a bike, but that wouldn’t end well because on downhills it would slide forward unless i distributed the weight somehow to make the front of the bike heavier than the wagon… which is not gonna happen because that would either be impossible with the supplies i have or render the bike entirely nonfunctional. leaving the wagon to clunk back and forth is also an issue given that i am trying to get this man medical attention asap and not actively make the situation worse. i’ve done this wagon and bike thing before when both people involved were starting out fine and even that didn’t end well. (in case you were wondering, we careened down the street crashing into one another and came to a stop by hitting a parked car. we are all fine now and so is the car and we do not do things like this anymore. it was a terrible idea that i regret every day.) no go.

vacuum cleaner: bad idea. no. did i think of these as an option just because i have one and it has wheels? i did, didn’t i. do not attempt.

razor scooter: no. why. how. please stop this.

boards: possibly a viable option. we got skateboards, we got surfboards, we got actual just plain old wooden boards. (none of the ones in my home actually belong to me, but ignore that bit. trying to save a life here.) probably the best route would be to stick some skateboards under something big enough to bear up an entire human person, slap a few pillows or something over top, and get shoving. don’t ask about what happens when we get to the big hills. (yeah i live in an area made entirely of hills and it’s a long steep way down and a long steep way up to get anywhere of interest, and if you’re on wheels then sucks to be you i guess.) in retrospect perhaps not as good of an idea.

so i guess four hours later i’ve come to the precise conclusion that you did.

put stephen on a bike. put jack in a wagon. maybe learn to drive? jury’s still out on that one. anyway that was a fun four hours that i won’t regret spending this way at all no sirree.

alright! hope this wasn’t too strange or unreadable! have a nice day, you’re wonderful!

#submission #aubreyad blogging #added a courtesy readmore but i highly recommend clicking thru #i giggled all the way through this it's delightful #i am also a noodly armed individual with no physical or legal ability to drive. solidarity #good point about them refusing to engage in the shenanigans also!! i doubt i could force either of them to acquiesce with my nonsense #they'd have to be Out Cold or Really Desperate #although. modern problems require modern solutions. play a youtube video of their interests on yr phone and hand it to them. solved.

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renaer-is-allegedly-hot · 3 years

Text

session 18

Session 18

Sunday, February 28, 2021 7:33 PM

- "we're all gonna die"

- Lilguerite talking about soup and secondary soups and tertiary soups

- Last week on

- We went to the hideout thing

- In the prison thing

- "you take little bites you fool"

o "take bigger bites you fool" - marguerite, judging marianne

- There's a minotaur

- We tried killing this one guy but it didn't work lmao rip us

- 6 for initiative

- 19 for L (22}

- 14 for M (17}

- Theo shoots, misses (10}

- Dwarf

o Sylvia: "how big is his ass"

- Dwarf has an axe

o Aerana is probably the closest

■ Is hit

■ I'm unconscious

■ "I'm expendable" "no binch I won't take any of this negativity"

- Halfling asks theo for the lockpick

o Theo gives it to her

- Asyna turns into a crocodile

- Adam o o o o o

Tries to bite and misses

Cutting words Hits

Next minute dwarf is completely unconscious Strums one note for hypnotic pattern

Falls on his face (the dwarf not adam}

- Time to go get his keys

- Asyna has to roll a saving throw as a crocodile (17} ; she's fine

- Cel adds 8 to aerana

- Asyna turns into ape, grabs key, 11+2 for dex

- Throws keys to adam

- Adam lets big boys out first

o minotaur, ogre, another w ogre-like features but not quite sure what type of creature it is

- Cel lets out human and drow

- Asyna takes battle axe

- Asyna looks through pockets, 4 for investigation

- Asyna gives adam the axe and gives the axe to the minotaur

- Theo gets lockpick back

- Aerana moves to the back bc she's casually bleeding out

o Aerana in back with sword

- Asyna still an ape

- Theo doing smth I didn't hear lmao oops sorry lillian

- Dwarf gets up

- Adam "so you wanna surrender now?"

o Dwarf grunts

o Adam tells minotaur to sic him

- Cel rolls to hit, dirty 20 w disad

- theo rolls to hit, 15 w disad

o Cel hits

■ 12 damage

■ "can I shoot him in the ass?"

- Adam has to persuade minotaur

o 11, persuades and minotaur

o Hits, 21 damage

- Back to theo

o 18 to hit

o 9 damage

- Halfling looks around, turns to squad, says we have everything covered

o Adam asks for any helpful things

■ 27 for ?? Persuasion ??

- Asyna

□

21 to hit

Sighs and has a crude shiv and walks up and shivs the dwarf Hits, damage ig

o 6 damage

- Dwarf uses half his movement to stand, tries to run

o 18 damage from ppl around

- Asyna gets to hit again

o 21 to hit, 9 damage

- He runs off to the right

o Adam is like 80? Ft away from him, casts sleep ?

- Cel peeks out, sees arena with a bunch of blood

o No bodies ???????? Ew

- Arbys is the minotaur

o Because he's got the Meats

- Dom asks us for our passive perception

o We apparently don't see the thing

- Drow woman steps out

- Does blood trail stop?

o Adam investigating, 11

■ "sure" there's a trail of blood leading to wall, adam pushes wall, it swings inwards

- Cel goes in first, adam right behind her

- "are you guys finding the way out?" "we're finding the way in, dawg"

- Inviting them to come with us

- Ask them their names

o Human names

■ Arthritis

□ "there you go. He's smoking hot"

□ This is an elderly man

□ Why are we into him

♦

■ Claudio

■ Jia

OH WE'RE NOT ACTUALLY TALKING ABOUT ARTHRITIS

o Drow

■

Raylan Arwindar(?}

"if you follow quickly, minotaurs have an uncanny ability to memorize where they've been"

Looks @ asyna and aeranan and in elvish says if we're interested in visiting below, operation works on level 5

□ Puts on a ring and disappears

o Humans choose to follow minotaur

o Halfling is gone

- We can still pass without a trace

o Time to go down secret passage

- Adam peeks head into somewhere and sees four pillars glowing w sickly green/yellow light

o 100 ft long

o Urns scattered throughout

o Via thaumaturgy dims the lights, walks over to urns

■ Stealth check to go to urns

■ 30 stealth, notices some things abt room

□ Nine alcoves in wall; ones he can see have murals w beholders painted on them

□ Diff patterns + colors + eyestalk shapes

□ Large statues of beholder heads that look similar to the ones in the murals placed in front of them

□ To right, carved stone display of a scowling beholder flanked by two statues of wizards

□ Beneath each wizard's hood a light that pulses

□ The pillars are kinda pillars but they have bubbling liquids w a beholder n all of its eyes shuts in the tank

- Adam wants to let them out

o "bitch what the fuck" - sylvia

- Adam looks back at everyone else and says "what the fuck"

- There's an exit to the south, ahead of us

- Adam investigates

o Walks up to biggest beholder and "no don't do that" (sylvia} looks at it

o They're frozen in a serene pose; the furthest one is jet black and chonky, larger than the one that attacked our house

- Adam looks inside an urn

o Adam makes constitution save

o Dirty 20

o Unique smell that makes adam wanna puke

o Quickly shoves lid back on, adam picks up urn and takes it with him

o No one is hiding in alcoves

- Go out south door, see a hallway that looks like another hallway we were in earlier

o In front is heavyset wooden door, another passageway extending to right

o Door swings open, aerana looks inside; pitch dark which is unusual

■ Heavy desk made of stone in corner, ornate chair behind it w a spider motif

■ Bookshelves not really w any books

■ Two open crates

■ 25 for perception

□ Nat20 bois "it's an 8" "no it's a 6" - lillian and marguerite

◆ Spider motif gives off drow vibes

◆ Crates: stuffed beholders in them

◊ Grabs a bunch of them

◆ Small statues in other crate like trophy depicting smaller beholder being caressed by hands

◊ Looks kinda nice

◊ Some type of stone

◆ Empty bookshelves

◆ Chair smushed

◆ Drawers in the desk? Pull desk back

◊ Nat20, we move desk and it grates against stone; see different compartments in desk

◊ Nothing on or behind the walls

► Asyna recognizes chair theme

- Not made of wood, made of mushrooms

- 13 history check

• Looks like a chair from menzo bonanza

• Basically drow capital

• Asyna remembers that her mother used to hide things in her chair

•

- "guys there's a key in the chair. Can we look for a keyhole"

14 investigation

There's a sealed compartment in the chair, pulls out a small black key

o Try desk keyholes

o Left cabinet

■ Silvery silken sack

□ "what's in the sack" - adam

□ Asyna pulls out sack, hard to see

♦

o Right drawer

Nothing in it

Adam cannot tell us what it is

Jacob cannot tell us what it is either Asyna puts her hand in it, feels around Fits her arm in the bag

Tardis bag

■ �� Heavy tome

■ "it's not even a book. It's like a tome. This big black book"

■ Wrapped in webbing

■ Asyna recognizes it as just a typical book protector

■ Pages of symbols n words; some in elvish

■ Arcana check 17

□ It's a wizard's spellbook

- Use naya to find the jailer

o Goes out of pathway and to left

o Let's go kids

- Puts a plushie in the bag

o Puts 30 plushies in bag, they fall out one at a time

o Bag does not get heavier

o Puts urn in the bag

o Takes urn back out

o Only fluff in the plushies

o 10 investigation to see if there's anything in the plushies

■ Yellow n blue beholder

o Puts book in sack

- Aerana wonders if turning bag inside out is infinite

o Everything falls on the floor

■ The animals and the trophies

- Theo steps into the bag

o Put on the ground, oh never mind it's been 15 minutes

- 70 ft down hallway, see an eyeball thing

o Looks like a living thing, alien, looks back and forth every once in awhile

o Doesn't see us

o Sneak past it?

■ Narrow hallway

o Theo + aerana 20 to hit, same time

o Cel 17 to hit

■ Creepy shriek noise

■ Liquid slips out, drips, turns into cloud of green dust

o Dust in the bag

o Adam tries to do monster lines

o "now it's a bag of . beholding" - lillian, 2021

o We get some beholder dust in the bag by blowing

- Hallway continues, ends at a doorway w heavy wooden door w side passage and stairs heading up

o Naya looking up

o Adam peeking into other door

o Black smoke billows out of room, adam sees room lit with a halfling male with a dirty apron on, running around frantically

■ Appears to be cooking

■ Adam opens door and salutes

■ "head chef I'm here to help ! I was sent by the upper"

□ "finally I haven't had a break"

□ Gives adam the apron and mans leaves

◆ Leaves out off to right

□ "does the apron say anything"

□ Cel says if we survive she'll embroider "kiss the chef" on the apron

■ Adam puts food on top of rack, two halflings on bottom?

■ Adam rolls 14 investigation, sees one dirty apron and chef's hat combo

□ Aerana puts on chef's hat and apron

□ Thinks this is stupid

□ Asyna and aerana cook

□ Nvm asyna and aerana r following naya

- Adam pushing cart towards good smelling food

o V elegant chef ppl walking around

o Hallway transforms into smth less dingy

o Two large stoves

o Spice rack

o More elegance here

o Seven chef ppl

o Two small beholders; gazers

■ Floating above, chef gazers

o "well fuck you too" ???? Cel to adam ???

o Adam goes to most important looking chef and says he's responding to duty, says he was instructed to feed lord silgar but bc new doesn't know where to go

■ Gives self bardic inspiration

■ 17 for deception

□ Chef goes "what are u doing w that"

□ Can't give food to silgar

□ Cobalts look like little lizard ppl

□ Adam instructed to follow stairs from outside

◆ Left right left right again for xant chambers

#dnd #d&d #18 #sn

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doctorhelena · 7 years

Text

Steggy Fic: Fighting Lessons

I’ve written a drabble or short fic for every day of Steggy Week 2k17! This was written for Day 3: Firsts. Previous days: Day 1 | Day 2

“I think I’m getting somewhere with Agent Carter,” Hodge bragged, shoveling potatoes into his mouth like he hadn’t eaten in days. “That dame plays hard to get, but she’s definitely warming up to me.”

“Warming up to you in the sense that she hasn’t knocked you out in the past week?” asked Morrison, whacking Hodge on the shoulder and chortling. At the next table, Steve grinned to himself, taking a bite of the unidentifiable meat-based substance that had been served along with the potatoes.

“I saw that smirk, Rogers,” snapped Hodge. “I don’t think you have anything to laugh about, pipsqueak. If she keeps turning me down, she sure as hell isn’t going to go for you.”

Steve swallowed his bite of meat. “I didn’t say she was. I just don’t think you’re going to wear her down.” He shrugged. “I don’t think bullies are really her type.”

Hodge raised his eyebrows. “I thought you’d learned a lesson about insulting your superiors the other day behind the barracks, Tiny. You want to go again?”

Steve pushed his chair back and stood up. “Sure thing.”

Morrison sighed. “Use your brains, Hodge. If you beat him up any worse than you did Tuesday, you probably won’t be kicked out of the army, but guaranteed you’re not getting picked for Rebirth.”

Hodge shook him off. “I won’t break him. Just knock him around a bit.” He gestured to Steve. “Coming, hot shot?” Steve followed. Hodge was in for a bit of a surprise. He hoped.

They were headed for the same flat patch of ground behind the mess hall that Agent Carter had brought him to after she’d heard about the last fight. “You have to stay cool,” she’d told him, her voice low, almost intimate, in the darkness. “Watch for your openings, and use his own strength against him.”

She’d showed him what she meant, let him try it on her, drilled him until he could feel it click in his brain. Bucky had given him fighting tips too, but Bucky was a lot bigger than he was. Agent Carter wasn’t much taller or heavier than Steve, and she’d knocked out Hodge with one punch.

“Of course,” she’d cautioned, gulping down water as they took a quick break, “I had the element of surprise with Hodge. But the principle is the same. Stay low, stay focused, and fight dirty. Not only is it effective, but it makes them angry, and then they get sloppy.” She’d smiled at him, set down her canteen, and squared off again. “I have faith in you, Private.”

Now, Hodge didn’t wait for the interested group that had trailed out behind them to catch up. He just turned on his heel and swung at Steve without warning, grunting as Steve ducked under his arm and kicked his heel out from under him while he was still off balance. Hodge went down hard, and Steve stepped back. “Had enough?”

Hodge growled and scrambled back to his feet. Steve could hear Agent Carter’s calm instructions in his ear as he launched back into the fight. It was going far better than any of his fights ever had before, and he could hear the interested murmur of the crowd as they took in his improved performance. His lungs were the same as always, though, and he was starting to wheeze. “Having some trouble, Hodge?” he taunted, panting. “What’s the matter, arm too tired from punching people smaller than you?”

As Steve had hoped, Hodge gave another roar and flung a sloppy right hook straight at his head. Steve ducked under his arm and came back with a hard uppercut to the liver. Hodge went down like a sack of potatoes, and Steve grinned. It was exactly what Peggy had told him would happen.

“You’re a quick study,” she’d said, straightening her uniform and brushing herself off. “I can’t recommend getting into fights with your fellow recruits, but I rather think you’ll hold your own the next time.” She’d grinned. “Sometimes it’s a pleasure to teach a bully a lesson. And Hodge is the type of person who usually needs several lessons before he gives up.”

“Yes, ma’am,” he’d said, grinning back as he brushed dirt off his own uniform. Their eyes had met and held, and suddenly he’d felt utterly tongue tied. “Thank you,” he’d said, finally.

She’d cleared her throat, but hadn’t looked away. “Well, I suppose that’s that. It wouldn’t do to be found together behind the mess hall in the dark, out of breath, with twigs in our hair.”

He’d been glad of the darkness. “What would happen if we were?” he’d managed to ask.

“Well, there’s a certain blind eye turned towards relationships between male and female army personnel,” she’d said, “but as I’m currently in charge of training you, any interaction of that sort would be highly inappropriate. I’m afraid both of us would be subject to disciplinary proceedings.” Maybe it was his imagination, but he’d thought she’d sounded regretful.

He’d swallowed. “Oh.”

She’d cleared her throat again and finally broken his gaze. “Well. I’ll see you tomorrow, 0600 hours on the field, soldier.”

He’d felt more on solid ground. “Yes, ma’am.”

She’d started to walk away, then turned back. “Peggy,” she’d said firmly. The corner of her mouth had turned up into a smile. “Although one has to be careful of appearances, there is actually no regulation that says we can’t be friends.”

Now, Hodge took quite a while getting to his feet, and it was clear from the murmurs of the crowd around them that Steve had won. Hodge grunted. “You might have got in a lucky punch, pipsqueak, but I have never not gotten the girl in the end. You wait and see.” He turned on his heel.

“First time for everything,” said Steve, mildly.

#steggyweek2k17 #fanfic #steggy

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wolfoncaffeine · 7 years

Text

this burden

Rattled by the fighting and death at the crossroads, Eirlana seeks both distraction and advice from Solas. ao3

Sunlight, low and slicing through thin clouds, gilded the spring taiga, affording the Hinterlands a radiance at odds with the rebellions’ chaos.

Naked and shivering, Eirlana strode into the pool and nearly leaped back out. Instead, she waded in up to her waist and scrubbed herself with the cloth she held. The dried blood washed away in moments, yet its feeling remained, a tightness to her skin. She scrubbed harder. The anchor thrummed, sending shivers along her bones.

Eventually, she stumbled out, dried, and dressed.

Damp hair bound in a bun, she stepped through the ferns to the cliff. From her vantage point, the sun remained in the sky, yet twilight draped over the valley below, turning trees into spectres and campfires into targets for bandits. Leagues away, Redcliffe’s castle peeked over the hills.

She sat, pulled her tools from her satchel, and began grinding elfroot into a mush. Tomorrow, she’d deliver a batch of potions to the corporal. Even with her standing offer to heal whenever they happened to pass through, it wouldn’t be enough.

Until a healer turns up and agrees to work in a war zone, nothing will —

Gleaming with sunlight, a sword cut the thought off.

She flinched, crumpling roots. Too clear, too recent to be shoved aside, the memory bulled forward — stumbling away from the weapon, stammering, a flash of lightning, and the templar bursting, spraying blood. Another — a mage preparing to cast on Varric, a fade-step, then her own staff-blade in the elf’s gut.

The anchor’s thrumming sped up, keeping time with her heartbeat.

Bile pushing up her throat, she leaned forward and pressed her forehead against the ground. She tried to think of something else, the astrariums or those skulls on pedestals, the sound of a cracking skull —

Hands shaking, she set her mortar aside, then crawled forward and vomited over the edge. Her throat burned, making her eyes water. When nothing else came up, she collapsed to the ground, shuddering. Thinking of nothing, she stared at the stars.

After a minute, the nausea faded a little. Moving slowly, she wiped her tears away and crawled back to her tools.

Dusk had fallen without her notice, shrouding the cliff in shadows. Silently reciting elfroot’s uses to keep her thoughts occupied, she cast a dim mage-light and picked up her mortar again.

Footsteps and a voice calling, “Herald?”

She straightened out of her slouch. “Over here.”

A smudge of green and grey in her peripheral, Solas stepped through the ferns. “You have been gone a while. Are you well?”

She flushed with heat, afraid he’d heard her retching, and squashed another root with her pestle. “Yes, I’m fine.”

“…I’ll leave you be.”

“Solas, wait,” she blurted, then blanked on what to say. “Would, would you tell me about Elvhenan?”

“Am I not intruding?”

“No, you’re not,” she said, still staring at her hands. “I’m just worn out. But I’d love to listen to you. If you’re not busy.”

“Of course.” He sat down next to her. “What do you know of Halamshiral?”

Gathering her thoughts, she bottled the elfroot mush and repacked her tools. “It was founded a thousand years ago, after the war with the Imperium, after Andraste’s children gave us the Dales, and after The Long Walk. It was the capital of the Dales and its cultural centre for three hundred years. In the second Exalted March, the city and nation fell to Orlais.”

Solas hummed. “An accurate history, if lacking any meat.”

“Everything else is speculation,” she sighed. “The Chantry was thorough in its sacking.”

“Precisely. The Dalish strive to remember Halamshiral, but Halamshiral was merely a fumbling attempt to recreate a forgotten land.”

“Arlathan.”

“Elvhenan’s greatest city,” he said, voice turning wistful. “Place of magic and beauty, lost to time.”

“You almost sound like you’ve seen it.”

“I have.”

Eirlana stared at him. He’s — “Creators, you’ve seen it? In the Beyond? You’ve been to Arlathan’s forest?”

“Once.” His gaze fell, something that looked like sorrow on his face. “A long time ago.”

Her heart thumped, loud in her chest. “So?”

He looked up, meeting her eyes, and smiled faintly. “We hear stories of them living in trees and imagine wooden ramps or Dalish aravels. Imagine instead spires of crystal twining through the branches. Palaces floating among the clouds. Imagine beings who lived forever, for whom magic was as natural as breathing. That is what was lost.”

“Wait. Wait. The myth about immortality is true?”

“In a sense; their bodies did not fail with the passage of time, so long as they did not remain in uthenera for centuries.” He paused, head tilting. “You do not believe me.”

“I…Fen’Harel’s bloody teeth.” She shook her head, stunned, and took a deep breath. The air cold made her nose ache. “I never believed in the myth,” she corrected, “not entirely. I thought there was a grain of truth to it, but immortality…never seemed probable.”

“And why is that?”

“Our bodies aren’t that durable. Flesh scratches, tears, bruises easily. Bones break if you fall and land wrong. Organs deteriorate noticeably within decades. For the ancient elves to have been immortal, their bodies would’ve necessarily been remarkably different from ours. That or magically sustained, which would require a ridiculous amount of energy.”

“As would suspending buildings in the sky.”

She rolled her lips. “Assuming the loss of immortality is fact, maybe our access to the Beyond was reduced at some point.”

“That is possible.” After a beat, he said, “There is much more about Elvhenan to tell, far too much for one conversation. Is there anything else you would like to ask?”

She began to say ‘healing magic,’ to ask after what he’d gleaned from his studies and how she could improve her technique, but stopped. Her skin itched, as if the blood remained. A sprawl of bodies lingered in her vision. “You’re a healer, right?” At his nod, she looked down at her hands again, fiddling with her sylvanwood ring. “How do you separate the you that heals from the you that kills?”

Silence answered. She clenched her fists, skin hot, nausea building again. Fenedhis, I shouldn’t have asked —

“I don’t suppose I do, anymore.”

She looked up, startled. Something must’ve shown on her face, for his expression softened.

“The fighting we participated in troubles you.”

“I’m not,” she swallowed, “accustomed to killing. Or battle.”

“Considering your position as First, I am not surprised.”

She laughed, a huff of breath. “Perhaps you should be.” He raised an eyebrow and she looked out over the valley, darkened to ink, before continuing. “Every First-in-training learns to command and fight.”

“Your people have warleaders, correct? Is the defence of your clans not their responsibility?”

She shook her head. “Not entirely. Warparties are often away, dealing with threats that venture into our territory. A Keeper is always with their clan and must always be ready to defend it. So, battle is among the many things we study.”

“Without practical training to complement the theoretical, you cannot expect yourself to perform as a soldier would.”

She shot him a look. “I’m not. I only expect to hold my own.”

“The more experience you gain, the more you will adjust. For now, I suggest you hold a position to the rear, support from a distance, and pay attention to what both your allies and opponents are doing. And,” he added, voice turning stern, “do not take unnecessary risks.”

“Implying I’ve already taken one?”

“Your defence of Master Tethras.”

“Since when is saving Varric an unnecessary risk?”

“It is the manner in which you did that is problem.”

“If I’d cast from that distance, the mage could’ve easily deflected my spell at Varric.”

“Deflected spells rarely cause more than superficial harm.”

“Meaning the risk remains that they could cause more,” she snapped, sharper than intended. His eyes narrowed, irritation showing in the crinkles between his brows. She suppressed a sigh and twisted to face him. “Solas, my duty as a First is to protect my people. I recognize that, as the one in possession of the anchor, I’m vital to the Inquisition’s success, but I will never put a friend in danger if it can be avoided.”

“That is admirable,” he said, expression smoothing, “yet if you cannot guard yourself in battle, your resolve is irrelevant.”

She nodded. “Then I’ll practice. And I promise to be mindful of the risks I take.” For several breaths, he merely held her gaze, remaining silent. “Tell me, why did you choose to become a healer?”

His words pulled another memory up — laughter and iron rasping, a sword blurring, a storm of spelled lightning, blood flowing through her weak spells and shaky hands, and a limp body heavy on her back. She tensed slightly, perhaps slightly enough to go unnoticed. “I realized that my lightning alone wasn’t enough to protect.” Her voice did not waver. She did not drop her eyes.

He hummed. “I believe you have the answer to your question.”

“Pardon?”

“You wish to safeguard the lives of those around you. To succeed you must accept that doing so will inevitably result in blood on your hands, that of those you kill and of those you cannot protect.”

Just for a moment, she closed her eyes, embarrassed to have hoped for a different answer. He’d spoken with his usual detached tone, and yet, from his mouth, the words weighed true. Deshanna had once given her the same answer, with the same weight in her voice. I must accept this. I am First of Lavellan and I do. I do. Heavy and unyielding, Solas’ words settled over her heart. “You speak from experience.”

Again, a shadow passed over his face. “I do.”

“Ma serannas,” she said calmly, despite not feeling calm at all. “I appreciate your honesty. And guidance.”

“You are welcome. You carry a heavy mantle and a heavier responsibility, as the Herald of Andraste. I would ease that burden, however I could,” he replied, with all the solemnity of an oath.

Which, oddly enough, it sounded like.

His gaze left hers and wandered to the ground. “The hour grows late. We should return to camp, Herald, and prepare for tomorrow.”

“Alright.” She walked with him through the ferns, lengthening her strides to keep pace. Lighting the way, her mage-light hovered between them. “Solas,” she said, spotting the campfire’s glow ahead, “may I ask that you don’t call me ‘Herald?’”

“You did not ask the same of Seeker Pentaghast,” he replied, not accusingly.

“Cassandra is Andrastian. You aren’t, unless I’m mistaken.”

“No, you are correct. However, there is still the matter of decorum.”

“I know. Only ‘Herald’ in public. Josephine lectured that into me after the first mishap.”

“Very well. What would you have me call you?”

“Just ‘Eirlana.’”

“As you wish.”

#da fanfic #my fic #eirlana lavellan #solas #solas & lavellan

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embloomfields · 7 years

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A/N: hi! in lieu of a new chapter, which is on hold because of The Great 1DFF Drought, i give you this... possibly canon extra that hasn’t been edited and is a giant piece of fluff but writing it made me feel warm and fuzzy over two excruciatingly busy weeks. anyway.. enjoy! please send me your thoughts :)

“Maybe I’m just crazy.” Sasha frowned at the negative pregnancy test on the bathroom counter. "I would have put money on it."

I rubbed her back. I swallowed my own disappointment to offer Sasha comfort. "You're not crazy. The signs were there."

A tear trickled down Sasha's cheek and she wiped it away hurriedly. We both started at the white plastic stick as if the results might magically change under the weight of our disappointment. My chest tightened at the thought of more negative results in the future and how disheartening it would be to not get what we were after month after month. I could control so much in my life, buy almost anything I wanted, but fertility was beyond my control while Sasha insisted on trying the natural way.

Sasha sighed heavily and leant into my chest. "The wedding is in a few months anyway. I guess it isn't really the right time."

"No. Don't do that," I snapped. Tension radiated from my entire body and Sasha's instinct was to curl her arms around my middle. "Don't talk negatively. We will keep trying. It will happen for us. The doctor said it could take a while for your body to stabilise after coming off the pill. You only went off it a month ago."

Sasha sniffed and tilted her head so she was looking up at me. "I'm terrified I won't be able to give us what we both want so badly."

"Angel," I crooned. "You have to give your body time. One negative test doesn't mean you're barren. Besides, two can play at that game. What if I'm the problem? What if I'm shooting blanks? I've certainly never been in a situation where I tested my fertility. I was a strict condom man before you waltzed into my life."

Sasha laughed. It was soft and airy, the sweet kind of laugh that warmed the coldest parts of my soul. Hearing Sasha laugh, any of her laughs, was magic. She was never more beautiful that when laughter spilled from her body.

"I waltzed in? I believe you strut into my life with an intoxicating air of authority and confidence." She laughed again and gazed at me fondly. "I couldn't figure out if you liked me or hated me on sight. You left me feeling very rattled."

"You unsettled me," I murmured into her hair. She smelt like the vanilla and raspberry shampoo she had used ever since I met her. It was the smell of home, comfort, and love. “I knew the second I saw you that you were going to have a significant impact on my life. It took two seconds to realise you were important.”

“Please,” she scoffed. I didn't react to the nudge of her elbow against my stomach. “You were running through all the different plays you could make to get in my pants.”

“Mm,” I nuzzled again Sasha’s hair, “that too.”

Sasha kept staring at the pregnancy test. While she wasn't looking at me I relaxed the control I had over my features and let my disappointment show. I had been the one to suggest we start trying, the more excited one as we ventured toward starting a family. Sasha had been hesitant — what if we weren't ready, shouldn't we wait until after the wedding, were we rushing to have everything all at once? — But I knew there would always be a reason not to start trying. What mattered was the abundance of reasons to try.

Now, with failure staring me in the face, I had my own reservations. Could we handle potentially months of being let down by negative results? The months leading up to our wedding and afterward should be spent on cloud nine, not with Sasha crying on the bathroom floor and me barely holding it together because a child seems further and further out of the realm of possibility.

“I guess what I thought were signs of pregnancy was just PMS,” Sasha said. I tightened my hold on her, almost wishing I could squeeze all the sadness from her. “Some symptoms do overlap. Breast tenderness, cramps. They just felt different but maybe it was all in my head.”

“The nausea isn't a sign you're getting your period, though.” When Sasha though she had a bug but it never went away, I turned to Google. I was used to her breasts feeling fuller and heavier in my hands for a week or so every month. I knew when to bring her the wheat pack for her cramps. Two weeks of feeling nauseous, extreme fatigue, and paling at the smell of red meat wasn’t part of the monthly routine, however.

“Maybe the change of season is messing with my body.”

“Or maybe you’re run down.” I raised my brows and Sasha rolled her eyes. Between the wedding, work, and social commitments, Sasha never stopped. The scare a few months earlier where she was hospitalised for exhaustion still haunted me. “You need to learn to delegate, baby. Hire a wedding planner. Let your assistant take on menial tasks.”

Sasha scoffed. “Says the man who runs the universe with an iron grip on everything.”

“I delegate,” I huffed before I conceded. “But, we could probably both be better at it.”

Sasha didn't respond. I watched her carefully as she wriggled from my grip and dramatically threw the pregnancy test in the bin. She turned back toward me and smiled. It didn't brighten her face and knowing she forced a smile, likely for my benefit, made my heart ache.

“Let's get you to bed, Angel.”

Sasha didn't protest, despite the early hour. Rarely were we in bed before 10 but tonight had gone on long enough and I could sense Sasha was fighting off tiredness. She was out almost the moment her head landed on my chest and I lay perfectly still under her, stroking her hair with one hand and flicking through emails on my phone with the other.

She slept peacefully, her chest rising and falling in a calming rhythm that made me own eyes heavy. The hours where Sasha slept, tucked against my side or with her head in my lap while I worked, were some of my favourite. I didn’t worry so much when she was asleep. During the day, when we were apart or together, anxiety sat in my chest like a sack of rocks. It was harder to breathe when Sasha wasn’t around and if my mind was too idle, it wandered to all the ways I could lose her.

“Harry!” The urgency in Sasha’s voice cut through my sleepiness. She shook my torso and repeated my name.

“Mm? I forced my eyes open and gazed at Sasha wearily. I had no idea of the time, or how long it had been since I dozed off.

“We’re out of mint chocolate chip.”

I groaned. “That’s what you’re worked up about? Baby, its ice cream. We’ll buy some more. Go back to sleep.” Sasha slapped my chest. My mind wandered to eating ice cream off Sasha’s naked body. A delicacy I’d enjoyed a few times since we met. A cheeky grin tugged at the corners of my mouth. “If I was about to eat it off you, I might care a bit more.”

“Harry, I want mint chocolate chip ice cream. We’ve only got boysenberry swirl.”

I glanced at the bedside clock, surprised to find it was half 11. I couldn’t have been asleep long and we’d only gone to bed an hour and a half ago. “I don’t care what the flavour is as long is I’m licking it off you.”

“Harrison, stop,” Sasha whined. “I really want mint chocolate chip and we don’t have any. I’m going to Sainsbury’s to get some and I didn’t want you to worry if you woke up and couldn’t find me.”

I sighed. I pushed the blankets off my body and swung my legs over the edge of the bed. I’d told security to enjoy an early night and there wasn’t a hope in hell that Sasha was going out to the supermarket alone at this hour. She might have started boxing with JJ and could defend herself physically, but it wouldn’t help with the mental scars of an attack. She already battled with the damage inflicted by Donald and Andrew Forrester.

“Let’s go then.”

We set off in our pyjamas, only bothering to get coats and slip on shoes. I flicked a message to Sullivan, who would undoubtably be alarmed by the movement in the house — sometimes I wondered if the man ever slept. He was damn good at his job, always across every aspect of mine and Sasha’s security. I paid him handsomely because I knew losing him would be worse that paying above the going rate.

“Pull over,” Sasha demanded. I glanced at her for a second and she shrugged. I pulled up at the kerb and switched the car off. Given the hour of night and the fact that the store was about to close, we were in and out of the supermarket in five minutes. It took longer to drive there than it did to purchase the ice cream and it was going to take us even longer to get home. I watched Sasha, not saying a word, as she picked her handbag up from the footwell and pulled out two dessert spoons out.

“What? It will melt before we can get home.”

I frowned. “We’re ten minutes from home.”

Sasha handed me one and kept the other for herself. The lid was off the tub of ice cream and a scoop was in Sasha’s mouth before I could register that this was really happening. We were pulled over on Brompton Road and my fiancé was shovelling ice cream in her mouth like an excited toddler.

“Slow down! You’ll make yourself sick,” I warned, completely aghast at Sasha’s enthusiasm for dairy at midnight. “What on earth has gotten in to you?”

“Dunno.” My usually eloquent fiancé was lost in a mouthful of mint chocolate chip at midnight. Sasha bat her eyelids at me and I sighed. Never in my life did I think the sight of a woman eating ice cream in my 150 thousand pound car would turn me on. But the tug in my groin was there and the growing need to pull Sasha onto my lap couldn’t be ignored.

I continued to watch Sasha eat and tried not to be offended when my spoon got slapped away as I tried to get a scoop. I shifted in my seat, readjusting myself when the thoughts of pulling Sasha onto my lap and sinking into her became too much. Sasha shrugged off the looks I gave her and happily finished off the tub of ice cream.

“If you still want to eat the boysenberry swirl off me, I’m up for it.”

“Mm?” I hummed absentmindedly. My mind was turning and my eyes dropped from Sasha’s face to her stomach. Her hands flew to her middle and she shrank back into her seat. “Okay, you’re making me feel self conscious. The ice cream hasn’t stacked pounds on just yet.”

“Sorry,” I replied. I reached for my phone in the centre console and type the question running through my mind into Google. “9 out of 15 women experience false negative results before they reach week 8 of pregnancy.”

“What?”

“9 out of —“

“I heard you,” Sasha interrupted. “I’m just…”

“You don’t wake up in the middle of the night with cravings that make you leave the house. It’s just another sign on top of all the others. It can’t be a coincidence, Angel.” We only took one test. The result could easily have been wrong. Sasha drank a litre of water an hour before, it was late at night, it was likely early days — they were all things that could cause a false-negative result. “You should do another one. Maybe a few.”

“I’ve got a stack in the bottom vanity drawer. I suppose it can’t hurt.”

“Seat belt, Miss Ginsberg.”

Sasha grinned and the car roared to life before I took off from the kerb. There were no comments on my driving, though there normally would be — ‘you’re not a race car driver, Harrison’ was a favourite. The same excitement that bubbled in my stomach was the same excitement from earlier in the night. The possibility of starting our family, entering the next phase of our lives, overwhelmed me with joy.

The wait for Sasha to pee on a stick, for which I was locked out of the bathroom because I made her too nervous to go, seemed to last a lifetime. I paced the length of our master suite. I tried to think of other things in the hope that a distracted mind would make the time pass quickly. Despite how long it felt, it was less than ten minutes before Sasha came out with the plastic stick in one hand and her phone in the other.

“Thirty seconds to go,” she announced. My heart was thudding in my chest, faster than I ever thought possible, and I didn’t realise my hand was shaking until Sasha took my hand in hers and gave it a reassuring squeeze.

The timer on Sasha’s phone went off. I exhaled long and slow. “Alright, let’s see.”

Sasha lifted the test so we could see the results display window. I watched her face fall as she registered the outcome. The tearful waver in her voice broke my heart when she said the dreaded word,“Negative.”

I forced myself to tear my eyes from Sasha’s face. I grabbed her wrist and lifted the test closer to my face, studying it carefully. “No. Look. There is a second line. It’s faint, but it’s there.”

“I left two more on the bathroom sink, check them if you want but I can’t… I can’t.” Sasha brushed the tears from her cheeks and sniffed. I pulled her into my body for a hug. “I love you and I want this so badly… I can’t be let down again tonight. I’m sorry.”

“I’ll see you in bed in a second, Angel,” I murmured. I kissed the top of Sasha’s head and walked her over to the bed before tucking her in.

I quietly made my way to the en suite where I spotted the two tests Sasha was talking about, testing on the long vanity. They were different shapes, which suggested different brands, and I was glad they had result indicators printed on them. One needed a plus and a line and the other needed a line in both windows. Even though the plus and the second line were faint, they were there.

I fished the instructions out of the rubbish bin and scanned the page for the answer I was looking for. I couldn’t stop the high pitched noise from escaping me when I found it. False-positives were incredibly rare and faint lines indicated you were pregnant but a blood test would confirm that result.

With the energy of a small child, I raced back into the bedroom and jumped on the bed. Sasha’s half hearted protest when I pulled her toward me and lifted her pyjama top didn’t deter me. I placed my hand on her lower belly and let the cheesiest, biggest grin form on my face.

“They all had the faint line. The instructions said it means you’re pregnant but we should confirm with a blood test.”

Sasha burst into tears. Loud sobs and dramatic tears. “Really?”

“Really.”

Sasha placed her hand over mine. “A little us.”

“I love you. I love you. I love you.” I peppered each proclamation with a kiss to Sasha’ s stomach. “I’ll call the doctor in the morning. Sleep now, Angel.”

I settled on my back and Sasha cuddled in to my side, resting her head on my chest. Her arm draped around my middle and her legs entwined with mine. It was exactly where I liked us to be.

“Harry?”

“Yeah?”

“I love you too.”

#pf #drabbles #1dff

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tellerford13 · 3 years

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MO ASTOR CHAPTER 43

Disclaimer We don’t own the bikes, brothers, or any “related” Sons of Anarchy, trust us, if we did we wouldn’t have the time to write. No money is being made from our stories. So, please don’t sue. It’d be a fruitless endeavor indeed. That being said, Harley, Journee, and any other newbies are ours, and we don’t share. :Whispers in creepy voice: “My precious.”

The universe This reality is a mix of cannon, and our own ideas. We strive to keep the boys cannon, but since we will be shifting around some of the events, that will reflect in our writing and their personalities as well. It’s our goal to provide you with quality fiction, and solid, fleshed out OFC

We appreciate constructive criticism and love LOVE reviews, they are a writers life blood and definitely help encourage us and inspire us.

A/N: The closer we get to show events, the more excited we are to show you our vision for how things went down. Because of the growth and changes our boys have undergone in Mo Astor, things are very different, and it’s going to show. So buckle up and join us for another ride in Charming with a different view.

Mo Astor Chapter 43

Jax

“Some day’s you’re the Beamer. Some days, you’re the goddam deer.” I announce, chuckling at the sight that greets me as I walk onto the garage’s lot.

“Some yuppie creamed her up at the streams.” Chibs informs me, clearly just as amused at the rather unique picture.

“He run into it or hit a tree while it was giving him head?” I ask, shaking my head at the deer carcass sticking ass out from the windshield.

“How the hell you want me to get it out of there?” Half Sack asks staring in horror at the deer that decided to commit suicide via Beamer windshield.

Walking over to the tow truck, I come back with a chain saw.

“Come on. Jesus, man.” Half Sack’s face pales. I smile around my joint.

I love fucking with Prospects. It’s a good way to blow off steam and test their commitment. You can’t just trust anyone with the shit we got going on behind the scenes, and after letting that coward Kyle slip into our ranks, we’re all more vicious in the weeding out process.

“Just pretend it’s carve-your-own-steak night at Sizzler,” I call as I walk over to Chibs

“I don’t eat meat, man,” Half Sack says. I shake my head. Who the hell willingly gives up meat?

“Figure out, grunt.” I have no sympathy for him when I think of all the vile shit I had to handle when I did my time.

Tig rode me harder than most, trying to make sure I’d be worthy of my father’s legacy. I love and hate him for that.

“What the hell happened,” Chibs asks about the meeting I’d been pulled into this afternoon.

“It was the Mayans who torched the warehouse. Stole the Niner’s M4s.”

“Holy shit.” Worry deepens the lines on his face.

“Clay’s gone to sit down with Laroy. Try to buy us some time.”

“Niners already paid for that hardware.”

“That’s the tricky part.” I agree. My cell phone goes off in my pocket. I pull it out and fight the urge to shake my head. She’s probably watching from somewhere.

“Hey, Ma. It’s not like I just saw you this morning or something.”

“Did you go to storage?” she asks, ignoring me. Ma and the girls have been riding me hard to get the room set up for Abel in me and Lee’s house.

Not that they haven’t done most the work on it already.

“Not yet.”

“Be a nice surprise if you had some things for the girls to work with after they visit your crazy ass ex for you.”

“I hear you loud and clear. Thanks—Grandma.” I get the dig in.

“Asshole.” She hangs up, and I laugh. I tack the trip on my to-do list. There’s not much I wouldn’t do to make the girls happy, and I know right now, living at the clubhouse and being escorted everywhere is trying. Hell, they have to be accompanied just to visit Wendy. I wonder if I should’ve grabbed her and brought her in for lockdown. With her not answering my calls, she was the last thing on my mind.

I feel the pressure on my shoulders grow heavier. Splitting myself in so many directions always leaves someone hanging.

Clay walks out of the garage with Tig trailing behind him.

“I’m going to head out and do my mother’s bidding. Keep an eye on our girls?”

“Aye. Gonna trail ’em to Wendy’s.”

“Surprised Baby J is letting her get that close to you,” I say, amused by her viciousness when it comes to my ex.

“Didn’t say I was gonna walk up to the front door.” Chibs winks. Smooth motherfucker.

I’m still chuckling when I mount my bike, put on my helmet, and follow the boys out of the yard until they turn to head toward Oakland.

I let the ride blow away all my thoughts as I become one with the road. The sun on my skin, the wind blowing away all my tension, I’m one with the bike and in communion with my surroundings. This is my real church, the place I come to feel linked to my creator.

I’m feeling a lot more level-headed when I reach the storage building. Parking in front of the door, I enter the code and lift the door to the climate-controlled area. For a moment, I’m not sure where to look first. I can see so many memories put here to collect dust and stop reminding us of the sorrow they brought with them—toys that had belonged to my younger brother, Tommy, and me. I can still picture the toe-haired kid with a big heart. He’s a hole in my heart that will never be filled in.

I see the crib against the wall, but it’s the knick-knacks that interest me. There are pieces of my father mixed in here. I wish you were here now more than ever Pops.

I caress the photos that disappeared off the wall once Clay moved into our home. I understand the why behind my mother recommitting so swiftly, but it didn’t change the anger it caused. We were doing okay there for a while: Ma, me, and Baby J. When Clay came in, it shot the dynamics to hell. The man knew fuck all about kids, let alone grieving teens, and it showed. We always felt welcome with my Dad.

Clay brought a coldness that had us walking on eggshells and out of the house more often than not. It didn’t escape my notice that the girls both started spending more time at Gran’s and later after she passed, at Tig’s.

I shake out some manilla envelopes and smile at the sight of my parents in their youth. They look so carefree and happy. I can’t remember the last time I’d seen Dad look like that after Tommy died.

A photo falls like a leaf landing onto a binder of something I don’t recognize.

What’s this?

I take it out and find a manuscript. I can hear my father’s voice reading out loud in my mind.

The life and death of Sam Crow. How the Sons of Anarchy lost their way. By John Thomas Teller. For my sons: Thomas, who’s already at peace, and Jackson... may he never know this life of chaos.

I pause to snap a picture and send it to the girls. Found something of Dad’s.

There’s something about this that commands my attention.

I open the first page and find myself sucked in and my view of everything I’d been groomed to take over, tilts on its axis.

I’m a few chapters in when my phone vibrates in my kutte pocket. It’s like emerging from a different world. I pull it out of my pocket and sigh. Church. Setting aside a few things for a Prospect to pick up, I take the manuscript and place it into my saddlebag before I’m drawn back into the fray.

***

I stalk out of Church with Mayans, the Niners, and guns on the brain. We have forty-eight hours to come up with the guns Leroy ordered, or we’re going to be in a bad spot with them. Our relationship with the Niners has been good. The last thing we need is both them and the Mayans out for blood. Charming is small. Ain’t many places for a person to hide. We know firsthand how damn ruthless the Mayans can be when they go to war. Bloody ‘92 will forever remind us that they have no limitations.

Still, I can’t help but wonder how they got the intel. Are they scoping us out or paying someone else in town to do their dirty work for them?

Ma rushes into the garage alone, and my stomach jumps.

“What’s going on?” I bark.

“I been trying to call you!” Her eyes are glossy, and her tone is wounded.

“Where are the girls?” I ask carefully, enunciating each word. Chibs left them with a prospect to look over them once he’d been called back for Church.

“At the hospital.”

“What?” Chibs roars from behind me.

“With Wendy. Junkie bitch took a hit and od’d.”

“Mother Mary,” Chibs whispers, crossing himself.

The bottom drops out of my world. I can barely hear as I sway slightly. Did this bitch kill my son? Blood rushes in my ears, and the world drops away.

“Shite. Let’s get you to the hospital, brotha,” Chibs urges, shaking me out of my stupor as he squeezes my arm, grounding me. I stumble out feeling drunk as I make my way to my bike. Part of me doesn’t want to make the trip to St. Thomas because that’ll mean finding out what might be an ugly truth.

The trip is a complete blur. I pull into a spot, kill the engine, and head inside. The doors open, and I step inside feeling like I’m traveling to the pit of hell with my mom on my heels talking to Clay.

“It’s gotta be the Nords dealing out of the Dog again.”

I’m going to kill those white supremacist bastards as soon as I see about my son.

A small hand grabs my wrist. I turn on my mother, irritated. “I don’t want you to walk into this blind, baby. Tara Fucking Knowles is the doctor on his case. The girls aren’t happy. I’m sure they’ve let her know by now.”

“Jesus.” I shake my head.

She narrows her eyes. “You knew?”

“I saw her once and looked it into it, yeah.” I hold my hand up. “We’ll talk about it later.” For once, she backs off as we travel to the correct floor.

I spot Tara standing awkwardly by my two pissed-off girls.

“What the hell is going on?” I ask.

“Bitch refused to tell us anything,” Journee says.

“Said we weren’t family or on the paperwork to release medical information to,” Lee growls.

“I’m changing that shit today. You got me, Tara?” I snarl.

She nods and swallows.

“Good. Now what the hell happened?”

“When’s the last time you saw her?” Tara asked.

“A couple of weeks ago.” I don’t just abandon people. Even when we break up.

“Her hands and feet were full of tracks. Toxicology reports aren’t back yet, but it’s most likely crank.”

“That selfish bitch,” Journee hisses.

Lee steps up on my right slipping her fingers into mine, and Journee steps up on my left, with Ma directly behind me.

All of them are lending me silent support.

She looked fine when we saw her.

I squeeze Lee’s hand and pull from her silent strength.

“The baby?” I force the question out of my clogged throat.

“We had to do an emergency C-section. He’s ten weeks premature.”

I close my eyes. “Holy shit,” I whisper. That’s not right. Are his lungs even developed yet? I might not have advertised it, but I read up on pregnancy.

“Come on, let’s sit down, and I’ll walk you through it.”

“Just tell us bitch,” Journee snaps.

Lee wraps an arm around me, and my sister’s arm joins hers.

I draw strength from them, bracing myself. Last thing I need right now is to be alone anywhere with Tara while she drops bombs.

Tara’s eyes dart nervously to all my girls. “He’s got a congenital heart defect and gastroschisis, a tear in his abdomen. The gastro and the early birth are from the drugs. But the CHD is probably—.”

“The family flaw,” Mom says softly.

Tara nods. “Yes, it’s genetic. Either one would be serious but not life-threatening. However, the two of them together—.” My stomach plummets.

She pauses, unsure of what she should say next.

I need to know what she’s holding back on.

“Just tell me.”

“Dr. Namid gives him a twenty percent chance, and I’m afraid that’s being optimistic.”

“How could we not know?” I shake my head, disgusted. We did everything but live there with her.

“Her OB said she missed her last appointment.”

“Bitch must’ve hidden that one,” Lee says from between her teeth.

“No one knew. Dr. Namid wants to fix his belly first. Then if he stabilizes, he’ll go in and try to repair the heart.”

She pauses, her brown eyes soften towards me.

“I’m sorry, Jax.” She says kindly.

I nod my head and blink to keep my emotions in check.

“I can take you to see him now.”

“Go,” the girls whisper, releasing me as Tara turns and I step forward, following her.

We get through the door, and I pause. “Tara! Maybe you shouldn’t do this. I’m sure you got other patients –.”

“I asked Dr. Namid if I could assist. I wanna help your son –.”

I glance over my shoulders at the girls. “His name’s Abel?”

Lee nods her agreement, and I return my attention to a befuddled-looking Tara.

“That’s a good name.”

I can’t do it—go in there and see my little boy laying helpless as he fights for his life while I stand by, twiddling my thumbs. I need to make the person responsible for this pay. Avenging him is an action. I need to be doing something, or I’m going to explode and destroy everything in sight.

I spin on my heels.

“Jax?” Tara calls.

I ignore her and continue to walk.

“Jax,” Ma says.

“J wait-” Baby J steps forward.

“Jackson?” Lee whispers, gripping my hand, trying to stay me.

Even with her firm grip trying to anchor me, the fury I’m feeling won’t be subsided.

“Go with Tara, and stay with Ma.” I point at Ma.

“I got something to do.”

Before they can argue I press a chaste kiss to Lee’s crow, releasing her hand and briskly walking down the corridor away from them.

“I don’t want to be calmed and soothed.

Right now I need some release, some revenge.

Daddy,” I vaguely hear my sister cry out.

“I’m on it, Mo.”

“Watch his back,” Clay calls.

***

Chibs

I’m on Jax like white on rice.

If anything happens to him on my watch, I’ll be getting my ass handed to me by the ladies and then my President.

Rage rolls off him in intense waves as he walks through the leather pillow-top salon-style doors of the Hairy Dog.

As he enters the smoky room, he’s a man on a mission.

I can’t fault him for it. I want to see him get his retaliation. I know how not getting it can eat a man up one flashback at a time.

He grabs a pool stick off the wall and begins to beat the tattooed bastard bloody on his own turf.

“Sell crank to my pregnant ex?” Jax is an enraged beast.

His boys move to surge forward, and Bobby pulls his piece.

“Easy boys,” Bobby drawls as only an Elvis impersonator could.

I let Jackie continue to whale on the lad for a few beats longer before I step in, post testicle piercing.

“Whoa, whoa, whoa” I snag him around the waist and pull him back. “I think you made your point. I think you made your point!” Jax stills, and I release him.

“Stupid peckerwood shithead.” Jax spits on the impaled, bloodied, and broken body.

I follow up with a little spit of my own.

“Enjoy your lunch. Shish keballs are on me,” Bobby says, bringing up the rear as we exit the den of hate.

Jax climbs onto his bike.

“You alright?” Bobby asks.

“I’m gonna see Op.”

“You sure you got your head back on straight, brotha?” I ask.

“No. But I need to know you’re with the girls.”

“Tha I can do.” It pains me to leave him to his own devices, but I’m not trusting the girls to Clay. They need a soft touch right now, and the Pres is notoriously heavy-handed. I haven’t had a cause to pray much recently, but I’ve thanked the man upstairs plenty, so maybe he’ll hear me now as I pray for the bairn who’s already got the odds stacked against him.

***

I spot the girls camped out when I enter the hospital.

Mo jumps up and runs to me.

“Daddy.” I open my arms and pull her to me, resting my head on her head.

“Where’s Jax?”

“He went to see Opie. Figured that might be the best thing for him.”

She hiccups. “Abel’s so small and so very sick.”

“I know, but he comes from strong, stock. He’ll be fine.” I peer up to see Lee watching and incline my head, opening one of my arms. She walks over, and I pull her to me, settling her beside her wife. I kiss Lee’s head.

“It’s going to be okay, girls. He’s got a lot of people out here rooting for him and good doctors.” Gemma glaring at the operating door doesn’t hurt either.

Feeling eyes on me, I glance up to find Clay watching us.

He could never understand this little family of four we’re building.

He’s always been … self-motivated.

I know how precious true family is, and I’ll cherish every moment of it I experience.

“Looks like you got this under control, brother. I’m going to check in on our other problems,” Clay says. “You stay here and keep me posted.”

“Aye.” He slinks away with Bobby following him, and I refocus on the girls in my arms who’ve seen their lives turned upside down in less than forty-eight hours.

“Come on, loves, let’s go take a seat.” I guide them to the chairs and sink down with both of them still attached. Stroking my hand over their hair, I lean my head back against the wall and settle in for what I know will be a lengthy wait.

“It feels like it’s taking a really long time,” Lee mumbles.

“Means they’re making sure to do it right,” I whisper.

“He’d know. He was a medic,” Journee says, working to soothe her wife’s nerves. I feel the slight tremor in her body that tells me she’s struggling to believe her own words.

“I hope so,” Lee whispers, glancing back towards the operating room doors.

“We can’t lose another Teller like this,” Journee’s voice waivers.

“Nah, that’s not going to happen. You need a nephew to raise your kid up with,” Lee whispers, lending comfort.

Journee sniffles and reaches across me to twine her fingers with Lee’s.

The girls both rest their heads against my chest and I let my fingers weave into their hair and massage their scalps.

Both of them release deep sighs and snuggle closer.

I know neither of them got much extra sleep this morning, despite their attempt.

And with the way the adrenaline has been coming and going it’s only a matter of time till their bodies grow heavy and their breathing grows even.

Gemma walks over to us sometime later and smiles.

“Always been attached at the damn hip,” she says softly.

I peer down and note the girls have fallen into a troubled sleep.

“Aye. How you doing, Ma?”

She shakes her head. “If that bitch isn’t dead, she’s going to wish she was when I’m done with her.”

I don’t have to ask who she’s talking about.

“Has there been any news on her?”

Gemma shakes her head.

“Not yet. Wish they’d come and tell me I never have to worry about her again.” She sighs.

Turning to look at me, she gives me those narrowed whiskey-colored eyes.

She’s been brewing something in that big brain of hers and it’s either gonna be really good for me or about to make me very uncomfortable.

“You’re good for my daughter. I worried I might never see that kind of joy in her eyes again. She was always my sweet baby. Kind-hearted and open. Not naïve, but a little too optimistic. I tried to train it outta her, but never could. Then I went and got used to it.” She gives a throaty chuckle and shakes her head.

“Seeing it crushed under the boot heels of some fucking traitor like Hobart. That shit hurt deep.” She narrows her gaze. “I ain’t never going through that again, am I?”

I’m wondering why she’s waited till now to have this convo with me and not before the wedding, but I know better than to question the Queen.

“No, ma’am.” I answer honestly.

She nods her head. “Good.” She smiles. “Give me a grandbaby, and you and I will be golden.”

“I’m working on it.”

“Yeah, I heard that for myself, Daddy,” she says sarcastically.

I grin unashamed. I’ll never be embarrassed about anything that Mo and I do.

A throat clears, and we both look up.

“He made it.”

Gemma grins, and I gently rock the girls to wake them.

“Wait, they’re doing the crow thing now?” Tara whispers.

“Another comment like that, and I’ll forget you just helped save my grandchild,” Gemma snaps.

“Journee is me wife and me old lady.” I glance down at Lee, who’s blinking up at me before I direct the wide smile I know gets under people’s skin at Tara.

“And I’ll let Leelove inform you about her new position.”

“Whas going on, Daddy?” Journee whispers.

“Abel made it through the first surgery, loves,” I whisper.

They’re out of my arms and jumping up and down like a pair of high school cheerleaders.

“He’s not out of the woods yet,” Tara cautions.

The girls turn to her with a look of disgust.

“Always the buzzkill,” Lee mumbles.

Tara clears her throat. “Wendy Case is also awake.”

“Trust me. You don’t want us to go see Wendy right now,” Gemma says.

“She’s going to need support to beat this—.”

The girls look at each other and burst out laughing.

Tara’s face falls.

“Ya have ta want help t’get it. Yew’ve missed a lot. So yer speaking on things ya Cannae understand.”

“We’re talking about decent human kindness,” Tara says, exasperated.

“There are so many things you’ve grown out of touch with Knowles. I’d list them for you, but we’ve got far better things to do right now,” Gemma says as her fingers fly over the keyboard. My phone vibrates, and I know she’s sent a club update.

When my phone begins to ring, Mo huffs and pouts.

“Yeah?”

“Time for church, Chibby. We learned a few things,” Tig says.

“On my way in. Bring the girls?” I ask.

Gemma shakes her head. “We have got to get a handle on Jax’s house for important reasons.”

I nod my head. “Need you to send a prospect to Jax’s old house for the girls.”

“He’ll be waiting for them,” Tig says.

“Appreciate it, Tigger.”

“You know they’re my girls too.”

“Aye. I know.” I disconnect.

“Duty calls, ladies, but there’ll be a prospect awaiting your arrival.

“The one who doesn’t eat meat?” Gemma wrinkles her nose.

“I don’t trust a man who doesn’t eat meat. Don’t patch him in.”

“I’ll keep that in mind when it comes time to vote.”

“Always liked you, Scottie.”

“Such a suck-up,” Journee teases.

I wink at her. Cupping the back of her neck, I pull her into a kiss. I savor her taste and softness before I pull away.

“One of us will come to bring you home if the prospect doesn’t. yeah?”

“Yes, Daddy.”

I pat her ass. “There’s a good lass.”

“Fill me in on my grandson before we leave, Knowles,” Gemma says, taking her aside as I pull away for Mo.

“Stay safe, Filip.”

“Always Mo Astor.”

***

Church is a different experience now that I have something more than the club and its secrets to protect. I know retaliation is coming with the Mayans, and now with Wendy’s bullshit, we’re looking into the Nords. It’s like placing a fucking target on my back, and yet, I can’t show the way I feel in any way. Not at the table in front of mixed company. The Nords only have about sixteen guys, but with their leader, Darby, out of jail and ready to make his presence known, we’re looking at brawn over brain action happening. We’ve turned a blind eye to the meth labs they run out of Lodi, but that was when they sold to truckers and Hispanic gangs. This is hitting too close to home.

“How’s his guy doing?” Clay asks.

I focus back on the conversation going on around me.

“Fractured cheek, broken nose, left nut swinging solo.” Juicy informs us with a smirk.

“Yes, it was beautiful!” I crow. “That’s my boy!” I let the laughter I don’t feel flow. I’m damn used to pretending.

“He’s lucky he’s breathing,” Jackie boy growls. I know he means every word.

“So, uh, any luck up north?” Clay asks, turning his attention to Happy, who we’d called in to try to replace our missing hardware.

“Tacoma can help with the Glocks, but there’s no M4s anywhere. Washington State, Oregon, Nevada, nobody’s got stock, man.”

Fucking perfect.

“We’ll have all the Mayan intel by the morning. We’ll get our guns back.” Jax says, turning to look at Juicy.

Juice nods.

They downplay how much good he’s done for our club but without him, we’d still be in the dark playing guessing games.

They start to conclude with treasury talk and other bullshit.

I’m counting down until I can get home to my wife.

“All right, all right. Anything else?” Clay asks. Finally.

“Yeah, I, uh, just wanna say to Jackson on a club level,” Piney begins. I sit up. He doesn’t do speeches often. “The Sons of Anarchy, the Redwood Original, is here for you. Your father would be proud of the man you’ve become, you know. Every time I see you sitting at this table, well, I do a double-take at you.”

“It’s probably just the weed Pop,” Opie says, lightening the mood.

Piney gives a chuckle. “Probably. I mean, he’s... Anyway, whatever you need, son, it’s yours.” The man’s old school. He understands what loyalty means. For people like him and me, the club is about the family we’ve chosen for ourselves, not the bullshit that comes with it.

“Thank you, Piney. Thanks, boys,” Jax says. I nod my head at him. He knows all he has to do is ask me.

“Meeting closed.”

Now I pay my dues, shoot the shit, and bide my time. The clubhouse doesn’t hold the same lure it used to.

“What the hell is that smell?” Clay asks.

“I don’t know. God, if I know. I smell it too,” Bobby says.

I tense up. The last thing we need to do is find a fucking dead Crow. With the way they do drugs, it’s happened before.

They walk around sniffing. Clay comes to the pool table. Shit. Which one is it this time? Peggy’s been hitting the coke pretty hard for someone her age.

“It’s that box,” Clay says.

“What is it?” Bobby asks.

“I don’t know,” Clay says. Clay opens the box, and the scent rushes toward us.

I gag when I see the decapitated deer head.

What the feck is this horse shite?

“Hey, that’s mine.”

Oh, for fucks sake.

I shake my head as my damn prospect rushes over, proud as shit, and lifts the rotting head up.

“Are you out of your goddamn mind?” Bobby asks, covering his nose and mouth. Even Piney, with his oxygen tubes, tries to plug up his nostrils.

“No, I just—You know, I thought it was like a surprise. We could mount it in the club. You know, like on the wall.

“It’s gotta be stuffed and treated, you idiot,” Jax says.

“Yeah, I know, I just... Stuffed with what?” he asks. Fucking hell, why am I in charge of this blundering idiot? Assholes assigned him to me while I was on me honeymoon with Mo Astor. Jealous, vindictive bastards.

“Got a real winner there,” Jax says.

“Feck off.” I nudge him playfully with my elbow, and he gives me a small smile.

“Jax.”

“Gotta go, Duty calls,” He says, nodding his head toward Clay.

“Good speed, brother.”

I join Tig at the bar, positioned where I can watch Jax. He’s not himself right now, and he’s got a lot to lose.

#sons of anarchy #sons of anarchy fanfiction #Jax Teller #chibs telford #Mo Astor

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andykoons · 6 years

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CHAPTER 7 - LOST IN THE MAIZE (part 1)

The Leonidas Safe Zone had all but disappeared. I always thought that when I escaped Saint Joseph county, I would be going to New York City or Los Angeles, not just slightly to the left of Saint Joseph county. This apocalypse is bullshit.

Sammy and I tagged along behind Addy. She was like a machine, never slowing her pace, always facing forward.

There were cornfields on both sides of the road. Wild, overgrown corn fields, no longer in the neat rows it had been in the years prior. The brown stalks stretching skyward with no farmer to limit their potential. Weeds grew tall in the spaces between the stalks, making a dense meadow that rose above our heads. There was a small flock of crows. Every few seconds, one of the birds would swoop down into the wild crops and fly back up. Eating without fear of human intervention. This whole end-of-the-world situation was probably the best thing that ever happened to nature.

I motioned for Sammy to come closer so I could get my water out of his backpack. I took a good swig before placing it back in the bag, all while we still kept up the pace with Addy.

Sammy was staring at the sword on my back.

“So you made that?” He asked.

“Yeah.” I said. “It was a bitch to make, and it’s not the best. But it holds it’s edge well and hasn’t failed me so far.”

“Can I see it?”

“Sure.” I lifted the leather strap from my shoulder and handed Sammy the scabbarded sword. He took it and studied it’s features.

“What kind of sword is this?” He asked.

“Not sure, to be perfectly honest.” I said. “It’s half Katana, half combat knife. I call it ‘Sentõ’.”

Sammy looked at me the same way I used to look at people who said they preferred the Star Wars prequels to the originals, confused and slightly disturbed.

“You named your sword?” He asked indignantly.

“It was pretty common in medieval times.”

“We’re not in medieval times, though.”

“We’re not? Have you been sleeping for the last two years?”

He looked back to the sword.

“What’s it like to use it?” He asked. I had to think for a second.

“You can do a lot more damage from farther away. It’s heavier than a machete so you have to be conscientious of your swings, or it’ll cut right into your foot. Once you figure out the weight and get used to how it moves, then it becomes more like an extension of your arm and becomes extremely effective.“

“I’d love to try it out.” He said. “Do you—“

“Quiet.” Addy said. All three of us stopped. Addy stood like a statue, listening for something, searching with her ears.

The flock of crows had vanished. I saw the tops of cornstalks moving about ten feet from the edge of the cornfield. They were jerking sideways. Something was in the corn, and it was moving towards us.

“What do you hear?” Sammy asked quietly.

A huge black mass jumped out from behind the curtain of corn and roared so loud I was sure my ears would bleed.

“The fuck?” Addy yelled. She raised her machete and walked backwards from the beast.

“Is that a motherfucking monkey?” Sammy said.

“No.” I said. “That’s a motherfucking Silverback Gorilla.” It stood tall and jet black right in the middle of the road. Most likely an escapee from the zoo in Battle Creek.

It was huge. Actually, ‘huge’ doesn’t do it justice. It looked to be twice the size of a body builder, and probably five hundred pounds, easily. It’s coat a deep black with a silvery patch on it’s back. Makes you wonder how it got it’s name. It bellowed loudly, spit flying from it’s jaws. It was probably scared shitless and starving.

The monstrous black beast stood and pounded his sledge hammer fists on his chest to establish his dominance. It worked.

“Sammy, Addy,” I said. “Lower your weapons and crouch down.”

They didn’t seem to like the idea. I remember seeing a documentary about gorillas and how they communicate. I don’t know if it will actually work since we’re not gorillas, but at this point, it’s our only option. A gorilla is just too fast and powerful to try to take with a sword and a machete. And this particular gorilla was about to tear our fucking legs off and beat us to death with them.

“Lower your goddamn weapons and get down.” I said again.

They listened. We simultaneously crouched down to show our submission. The gorilla beat his chest again and began to charge.

“Didn’t work!” I said. Addy reached for her machete and Sammy picked up Sentõ. We were fucked.

The three of us stood together, ready for the impact of this freight train of a primate, but the impact never arrived. It stopped dead in it’s tracks, staring at the cornfield.

It would look at us, then the fields, then back at us. It was trying to make a decision, whether to kill us or whether to do something else I couldn’t figure out.

A black cloud loomed over the cornfield. It was a massive swarm of crows. Their squawking grew louder and louder as the distance between us shrank. The gorilla made up his mind and fled.

“Afraid of a bunch of birds?” Sammy yelled. “Pussy!”

What had just happened didn’t make any sense. Are they zombie crows? Never seen those before, and I don’t think the virus affects animals. So I doubt it’s that.

“What the hell just happened?” Addy asked.

“I don’t know. But I think it had something to do with that.” I said, pointing to the cornfield.

The whole field came alive with movement. Just like before, the stalks were jerking around, but instead of one isolated area with the gorilla, it was the entire goddamn cornfield. And still the swarm of crows grew closer.

“I really think we should get going, guys.” I said. Sammy and Addy picked up on the urgency in my voice. I stepped behind Sammy and grabbed his knife from his backpack, some of his blood was dried on the hilt.

“You might get your chance to try out Sentõ.” I said to him. He pulled my sword from it’s scabbard and held it ready.

We started to run down the road when the birds started to fly overhead. I turned around and saw the first zombie emerge from the field and stumble into the ditch. It was followed by another, then two more, then ten more. the crows were swooping down, landing on the zombies’ shoulders and head and pulling off small bits of flesh and flying off before the zombie can grab it.

At least fifty had hobbled out and onto the road. They had changed direction and were headed for us. The dozens that were spilling out were just following the zombies directly in front of them. Which explains how such a large group can form, and also gives insight to their behavior.

I looked forward and saw more zombies walking out of the corn ahead of us. The zombies behind us were getting too dense to get through and the ones ahead of us was getting there too. We need to head west, into the other cornfield.

“Come on!” I yelled as I pointed North. We veered to the left. Addy sliced a path with her machete the best she could. We didn’t know what would be in there, but it beats the horde behind us.

“Go west about a hundred yards then turn right.” Addy commanded. “We’ll eventually reach the end of the cornfield. If we get separated, wait there until we all can meet up.”

“Okay.” Sammy acknowledged.

I was running as fast as I could, which was more difficult than usual in the thick crops. I turned my head back and saw that nothing was close behind. My body came to an abrupt halt and I collided with something solid. I hit the ground and it nearly knocked the wind out of me. I scanned my immediate surroundings to see what I hit. Of course, it was a zombie. It was on the ground next to me and it’s grey eyes found mine. I must look pretty tasty because it began to crawl toward me, bellowing an eerily human yell. I dropped Sammy’s knife when I hit the zombie and couldn’t find it. The zombie grabbed hold of my shin and pulled toward it’s twin rows or dark brown teeth. I kicked hard with my other foot and it let me go. I crawled backward to gain some distance.

Suddenly, it became very easy, and I realized all the corn stalks were bent down in a large circular clearing. I stood and turned around, Sammy and Addy were there, staring in silence. It took me a moment to process what I was seeing.

There were at least half a dozen smaller, circular mounds of corn stalks, sticks and foliage taking the shape of craters. In each of the mounds sat a female gorilla, most with a baby hanging on their back or suckling at their breast.

“What is this?” Sammy asked.

“It’s a nest.” I answered. “And we need to get the fuck out of here before—“

A familiar deafening roar cut me off mid-sentence. The male silverback we ran into minutes before burst into the clearing, and he was pissed.

“Seriously?” I muttered.

The silverback pounded his fists on the ground and made a series of unfriendly grunts. We not only imposed on his territory, but now we crashed his boning pad with shiny pointy things. I get it, I’d be upset too.

The giant gorilla was aggressively inching forward, but a wall of the undead materialized through the corn, shifting the animal’s focus onto them. They descended upon the creature. He tried to fight them all, some were thrown around like rag dolls, sailing ten feet in the air. In the end, which was only a few seconds later, the sheer number of the meat sacks subdued the beast and the silverback became another victim of the zombie apocalypse. The female gorillas grabbed their young and fled in terror, grunting loudly as they sprinted off.

The sight was unbelievable, and if it wasn’t for Addy punching me in the arm and telling us to run, I probably would have been eaten myself. We followed the females for another hundred yards before turning northeast. This time we stayed together, making sure not to lose sight of each other.

I kept my eyes forward. I didn’t want to defensive end myself into another zombie. The corn stalks kept smacking me in the face. I’ll never eat the shit again.

We finally reached an old path in the field and stopped to catch our breath. I planted my hands on my knees and huffed like the fatass that I am.

Twin lines where tires had beaten the dirt beyond the capability to support life ran north and south. It connected the road to an old farm house where a farmer presumably cultivated the corn that we were running in.

“This guy better have a fucking bazooka and a fucking helicopter.” I said. “And a fucking manual for that fucking helicopter so I can learn to fly it and get us to the motherfucking Alamo safe zone.”

I had to stop swearing for a second so I could breath.

“Fuck.” I added.

“Relax. A little cardio isn’t going to kill you.” Addy said.

“Yeah, well that kind might.” I responded.

We didn’t say another word. We just straightened up and moved past the path and into the corn again. No longer running. No longer in immediate danger. Addy was able to more effectively cut a path through the corn with her machete since we were at walking speed.

At least half an hour went by before we reached the end of the cornfield and emerged onto a vast green meadow. We must have been heading north northeast because the road we were on before was about a mile away.

“Do we get back on the road?” Sammy asked.

“I don’t think it’s necessary. We’ll have to go north anyway when we hit the old highway.” I answered.

We looked at each other, nodded in agreement, and continued walking.

Athens is a little over eight miles from the LSZ. You go east on sixty-six, which turns due north a few miles south of Athens, and goes right into the small town. We had been walking for probably an hour and a half. At our speed, the total trip should take about three hours. However, we just had a snag in our route. The last half hour of walking was slower since it was in a cornfield, but we might have made up that lost time by accidentally walking straight towards our destination. After we reach town, it’s just a matter of following Addy to this guy’s house. Assuming “a few miles” means three miles, it might be another half hour from there. So total, we have added probably seven hours to our whole trip. Not nearly as bad as I thought. I may have been a little overdramatic in my protest of going to Athens.

I’ll keep that to myself. I thought.

I maneuvered around beige discs of old cow shit. When I was living on a farm as a kid, and was actively throwing hygiene to the wind, I would take these naturally forming frisbees and send them sailing through the air to my sisters. I was a huge asshole back then. The memories were embarrassingly fond and very saddening at the same time.

“Oh god.” I whispered.

Are my sisters safe? Are they even alive? I thought.

Olathe, the town my older sister lives in, is right outside of Kansas City, and my younger sister is in Somewhere, California. Someday, I’ll need to accept that I’m probably the last remaining Becker kid. Not right now, though, I have to focus on getting to Athens. Eventually, however, I’ll have to come to terms with the fact all the people I grew up with are most likely dead and eating people.

“You okay, Miles?” Addy asked.

“What?” My concentration broke. “Yeah, sorry. I was zoning out.”

“Looked like you were trying to burn a hole in the ground.” Sammy added.

“So, Sammy,” I said, shifting the attention off of me. “What did you do before it all went down?”

Was that a dumb question? I thought.

“What did I do?” He asked with a raised eyebrow.

“Yeah.” I answered.

“I don’t know.” He shrugged his shoulders. “Homework?”

Yes, that was a dumb question. I thought again.

“High school.” I said in my most adulty, dad-voice. “I had a lot of fun in high school. Lots of good memories.”

“That’s because you peaked in high school, Miles.” Addy said.

“That is true… bitch.” I responded, we both chuckled. She didn’t mean any harm, and neither did I.

“Your high school experience was better than mine.” He said.

“Why do you say that?”I asked.

“Did your high school girlfriend take a bite out of your mom’s face?”

I didn’t answer. I just looked forward.

“Yeah. High school fuckin’ sucked.” He said somberly.

We walked a few more steps in silence.

“Sorry, Sammy.” Addy said softly. He turned to her and forced a smile, a single tear rolling down his cheek.

Addy put one of her small arms across his shoulders and pulled him close to her, hugging him and letting him know that even after losing both parents to the dead, he was not alone. I gently pat his back and smiled at him. It was all we could do for him.

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foursprout-blog · 6 years

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The Best Funny Brain Teasers That Will Make You Think (And Laugh Out Loud)

New Post has been published on http://foursprout.com/happiness/the-best-funny-brain-teasers-that-will-make-you-think-and-laugh-out-loud/

The Best Funny Brain Teasers That Will Make You Think (And Laugh Out Loud)

God & Man

1. When I’m young, I’m sweet in the sun. At middle-age, I make you gay. When old, I’m valued more than ever. What am I?

Wine

2. Without it, I am dead. If I am not, then then I am behind. What am I?

Ahead

3. How many three cent stamps are in a dozen?

A dozen (but you probably said four).

4. Can a man legally marry his widow’s sister in the state of California?

If his wife’s a widow, the guy is dead!

5. How far can a raccoon run into the woods?

Halfway. After that, he’s running out of the woods.

6. What has a mouth, but cannot eat. Moves, but has no legs. Has a bank, but no money?

A River!

7. Arnold Schwarzenegger has a long one. Michael J. Fox has a very short one. Madonna doesn’t use one. The Pope doesn’t, either. What is it?

A surname.

8. I am the beginning of sorrow and the end of sickness. You cannot express happiness without me. I am always in risk but never in danger. You may find me in the sun, but I am never out of darkness.

The letter S

9. Mike is a butcher. He is 5’09” tall. What does he weigh?

Meat.

10. Guess the next three letters in the series GTNTL.

I, T, S. [The complete sequence is the first letter of every word in the preceding sentence.]

11. On my way to St. Ives, I met a man with seven wives. Each wife had seven sacks, each sack had seven cats, and each cat had seven kits. Kits, cats, sacks and wives. How many were going to St. Ives?

One! Only I was going to St. Ives

12. Which is heavier? A pound of feathers or a pound of rocks?

Both weigh exactly one pound!

13. You are a cyclist in a cross-country race. Just before the crossing finish line, you overtake the person in second place. What place did you finish in?

Second. If you pass the person in second, you take second, and they take third.

14. A man is looking at a photograph of someone. His friend asks who it is. The man replies, “Brothers and sisters, I have none. But that man’s father is my father’s son.” Who was in the photograph?

His son.

15. The number 8,549,176,320 is a unique number. What is so special about it?

It’s the only number including every digit arranged in alphabetical order.

16. There are three houses. One’s red, one’s blue, and one’s white. If the red house is to the left of the house in the middle, and the blue house is to the right to the house in the middle, where is the white house?

In Washington DC.

17. You’re in a cabin and it’s pitch black. You have one match on you. Which do you light first: the newspaper, the lamp, the candle, or the fire?

You light the match first.

18. A man pushes his car to a hotel and tells its owner he’s bankrupt. Why?

Because he’s playing Monopoly.

19. A man left home running. He ran a ways and then turned left, ran the same distance and turned left again, ran the same distance and turned left again. When he got home, there were two masked men. Who were they?

The catcher and the umpire.

20. Your dad tells you he’ll pay you $6.00 an hour for the 6 seconds that you take to wash your hands before dinner. How much did you make for washing your hands?

A penny.

21. A farmer has 19 sheep and all but seven die. How many are left?

Seven.

22. In a year, there are 12 months. Seven months have 31 days. How many months have 28 days?

All of them.

23. Before Mount Everest was discovered, what was the highest mountain in the world?

Mt. Everest. It just hadn’t been discovered yet!

24. A plane crashes on the border of the U.S. and Canada. Where do they bury the survivors?

You do not bury the survivors!

25. I do not have any special powers, but I can predict the score of any football game before it begins. How can I do this?

The score is always the same before the game: zero to zero!

26. A family lives in a skyrise building on the tenth floor. Every day their daughter takes the elevator from the family’s apartment on the 10th floor to the ground floor and goes to school. When she returns later that day, she uses the elevator to get to the fifth floor, and then uses the stairs for the remaining five floors. Why?

She can’t reach the buttons higher than five.

27. Give me food, and I will live. Give me water, and I will die. What am I?

Fire

28. Which travels faster: Hot or Cold?

Well you can catch a cold, so hot’s probably faster.

29. You are driving a bus. At the first stop, two women get on. At the second stop, three men get on and one woman gets off. At the third stop, three kids and their mom get on, and a man gets off. The bus is grey, and it is raining outside. What color is the bus driver’s hair?

Whatever color your hair is! Remember, you’re the bus driver.

30. Imagine that you are in a boat, in the middle of the sea. Suddenly, you are surrounded by hungry sharks, just waiting to feed on you. How can you put an end to this?

You just stop imagining!

#Happiness

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diyaquaponicssystems · 7 years

Text

2 Days at a commercial aquaponics farm

Course in aquaponics on Bioaqua farm

I wanted to learn more about aquaponics on a commercial scale, so I went to the beautiful Summerset just outside Wales, a rolling landscape with hedgerows and meadows.

Along a small road has Bioaqua Farm with Antonio spearheaded set up their business with the cultivation of trout, they have four large swimming pools buried in the ground with two associated greenhouse. Two new greenhouse was about to be put up when I was there and there were even a couple of hives helped with pollination. I was the only “foreigner”, where although there were some who lived both in Brazil, South Africa and Greenland! Delightful mix of people of all ages but different amount of experience. The course was an intensive introductory course in two days alternating theory with practice.

DAY 1

Salad Aquaponics Began with the theory and history of aquaponics. The aquaponics is not at all new but already used thousands of years ago by various different peoples. We also went through different systems, pros and cons. Antonio claimed that Zipgrow Towers was equivalent to the NFT which I do not entirely agree with. The downside of NFT / zipgrow was under him that it acted as a major element, which heated the water, creating temperature fluctuations. It may well be that in certain situations with clean NFT, but it feels weird to Bright Agrotech not have pointed this out at all. Their system is much larger than Bioaqua farms.

After completing the theory that offered some interesting discussions, we went out and inspected greenhouses. They were solidly built with a wood frame and UV-protected plastic that covered too. They also had a good ventilation possibilities in hand, the plastic that you could cover for open depending on weather.

The ebb and flow / DWC / Aero

The water is fed out to the plant beds content spirit hydrograins using a distributor controlled by a timer. When the water in the planting beds reached a certain height started a siphon that began to empty down to a line of DWC beds. A special type of Styrofoam had holes drilled in with nätkrukor which mainly lettuce grew, but other major crops.

aeroponics propagation

The abundance of these ran down into a sump which also acted as a large propagation system using sprinklers. To get the first root growth were planted cubes first in this aeroponics system for later transfer to a “nursing board” where the holes for nätkrukorna set more tightly. Finally, as they were moved over to the disk where the holes were further apart so that all the plants would get plenty of light.

clever tricks

Bioaqua farm had devised some clever ideas which nätkrukorna did not go all the way down the hole without sticking up a little bit. The reason for this was that when the plants get bigger and heavier so they weigh down the Styrofoam so much so that the water reaches the crowns which makes them rot. This was enough, however, a problem that was quite specific to their solution as they were very large and heavy plants in their DWC.

Another smart idea was to plant the seedlings in a zig zag pattern so that the water circulated better around the roots. They had also thoroughly with oxygenation with a large oxygen rock every meter in the summer and a little less in winter ( read the article on oxygen and plants ).

greenhouse Inside

Something I have not thought of, but which was very logical was that the roots became host to microorganisms in DWC system, similar to that seen in the plant bed onto Leca balls. This meant that Bioaqua farm let the plants remain until they could replace them just because the microbes would continue to work. Had they removed all the plants at once, this had probably led to problems with the mineralization.

Pisces After the tour of the greenhouses, it was time to say hello to the fishermen. They were outside in the round and buried in the bottom conical tanks in a pattern number five in a dice where the sump was in the middle. They were well protected during both net and a tent. If I remember correctly, they held a total of 100,000 liters of water in the marshes. In each tank so swam a large amount of char in different plant stages which made it very easy to “reap” on various occasions. The variety was exclusively rainbow trout as this was both tasty, durable and quickly grew. They had tested other types of trout, but these grew half as fast resulting in significantly lower returns. The only thing that was different was the texture of the meat as Antonio. They were also GMO free which was unusual in the industry.

fish feed

Bioaqua farm use only “organic” food, which means that the corn used is GMO-free. This is mixed with catches which vessels have raised. According to Antonio’s what the fish eat determines how it will taste. The trout is a predator and it is the fact that makes it taste just fish. The price of the GMO-free feed and the “organic” feed skilled not a lot in price, but when you go through a pallet of the day in large plantations begins suddenly felt. What was one of the reasons that GM feed is used more often in large plantations. If the water is not filtered properly so the fish have a slimy taste.

controls

In Britain controlled all fish farms regularly and tests taken by the water. Bioaqua farm has very good values compared to traditional fish farms, probably due to the effective filtering with aquaponics, and that they do not fill their tanks.

Clean water

To fish would taste as good as possible, it was important to filter the water properly. Therefore had Bioaqua farm set up filters between the plant bed and DWC system. Because the holes were so small they were filled quickly back and Antonio emptied them several times a day.

Filter

Time to build After lunch it was time to get practical. We would put up our own aquaponicssystem (without fish). An IBC 1000 liter acted as the fish tank. These are cheap and easy to get started, but needs to be covered over when the resin is UV-resistant and temperature would shift too much if you let it stand in the sun.

It would then build a “radial flow” filter so that solid substances would sink to the bottom. The water here would lose a plant bed filled with hydrograins and a siphon would drain the water into a DWC system. A pump with T-cross was supposed to fill in both the IBC and the NFT system on the other side. Much to do, lets go!

Radial flow filters

We were divided into two groups where one group built a radial-flow filter, while the other began to cobble together a plant bed. To build the filter was very simple, and it is difficult enough to find the right material, rather than putting it together. What was important was that the filter tank corresponding to approximately 1/4 of the large tank volume.

plant bed

Finding a plant bed of the right size is very difficult, so instead they built Bioaqua their farm with the help of wooden planks that were painted on the outside and the inside covered with plastic, very smooth. Antonio used exclusively Torx screw, and when it was time to drill holes through the plastic began his first anticlockwise not the plastic would stick in the hole saw.

Building the plant bed

It was about what we he with on a day which was not a little.

DAY 2

We banged us again in the classroom and now we went into more rules about fish and how to get hold of their first fry. The rules for the UK probably differ somewhat from Sweden which meant that this part did not give as much. It was very interesting to listen to the section on water dynamics and how to build fish tanks that performed better than others. Around and tapered at the bottom seems to be the way to go.

After the theory we were treated to lunch with fish from own cultivation. Very juicy and tasty, but it apparently took 20min to peel. Take it times 10 fish then you have some work to do. For the most part so smoked the fish and made a pâté of it was very tasty. The question came up about how the fish were raised and killed.

Fishing net

For single fish, a large landing net, but then there were different types of networks that mattered. The fewer the fish that were in the tank, the smarter they became, and the more easily escaped the all fishing effort. Finally covered the entire bottom of a net which drew up the final bottom.

An important point that Antonio took up was to use gloves when the fish’s body temperature is much lower than ours. The large difference in temperature burn otherwise the fish skin and create unnecessary suffering.

Once up, he took a firm hold of the tail and with a finger in his mouth, he broke the fast neck of the fish. The whole thing took no more than three seconds without any suffering.

More construction

Template

Now it was time to complete the system. New beds were built, but this time they were filled with water instead. Styrofoamskivor (polystyrene) normally used for floor became a “floating raft” Once the holes were drilled. To avoid having to measure out the holes each time had Bioaqua farm made a smart template with screws that formed a perfect impression when pressed together with another disc.

The second group began working with a siphon that turned out to be a real headache, but eventually began to suck water. Personally, I am not eager to build when there are many parameters to fiddle with the width of the pipe, the amount of holes in the ground and how much water is entering the bed.

The bed was filled with three sacks hydrograins, oxygen stones placed in DWC system and NFT troughs that were completed since the previous placed so that it had to tilt the DWC. All that remained now was to get some power to the pump and then everything started to circulate. A little leaks here and there, but to have put the system on two afternoons, we can be quite satisfied. Speaking of leaks as Antonio had tried everything and wanted to be absolutely sure it is not leaking so he recommended something called PU-40 is a super silicone. No idea if you can get the equivalent in Sweden but it might be worth checking out.

Summary A rewarding course in beautiful surroundings. For Bioaqua farm as the fish was the main income which is different from what I have seen and are used to. This meant that the farm was better attended than the greenhouse where some defects appeared on the plants, probably when the pH was too high in my opinion. Being aquaponicsbonde however, is a right reserved plot and sometimes lonely job where the greatest social contact occurs at the farmer’s market. Pushing for the product you have is better is also a challenge, but the only way to go if you want to get paid for what you do.

The post 2 Days at a commercial aquaponics farm appeared first on Build Your Own Aquaponics System - DIY Indoors Or Outdoors.

from Build Your Own Aquaponics System – DIY Indoors Or Outdoors http://www.diyaquaponicssystems.org/introduction-to-aquaculture/2-days-commercial-aquaponics-farm/

#Build Your Own Aquaponics System – DIY Indoors Or Outdoors

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renaer-is-allegedly-hot · 4 years

Text

session 11 notes (i’ll fix them one day but i’m agro this was tea hate this)

Two minute one shot while dom pees

Adam has a floaty tube

Asyna can't turn into a hippo

Giant seahorse

Jane austen

Elizabethh and darcy my hands are shaking

Dom has 4e books

Dom was pretty out of it last session

It's afternoon

Dom is toasty

In jacob's other campaign a goat bit off his penis so the goat's name is richard byter

"at first the goat was reluctant"

"what a goat"

Last week on dragon heist

We were meandering through the city

"one of you met with an old friend, briefly"

Zoo time

Aerana knows where the zoo is in the sea ward

Raised brick gate w high walls; on top are intricate metal railing spiked stuff

Entrance is v wide, not too many people going in bc it's raining a lot

Maybe

Apparently the weather is super important and I still don't know why the weather is so important

It is currently raining

Pouring

Ticket booth in the front

Gold piece per person

Botanic repository

We walk up to the booth covering ourselves w the hoods we have

Velvet rope line but we just navigate through it like in shrek

Adam goes first

Walks in and see smiling figure, human male middle-aged, heavyset, festive outfit, "thank you for visiting - oH how's it going?!" it's volo

He's doing research for his newest obok

Hi jacob's dad

Jacob's gonna go fishing

Volo under impression he would be one of zoological experts but no

"recommendations?"

They brought monsters in from the isle of chault

Points us off to the exhibit to go

Originally zoo was not a zoo as we think of but like throwing them in a pit and being like look at them think httyd

Now it's closer to what we'd consider a modern day zoo

Lots of foliage

It's a big zoo

Like the San diego zoo

Or disneyland

Dom talks abt his brother's haircut

We can run through it

Can asyna just sprint

Aerana and asyna r gonna run

Adam cel and theo r gonna not run

Most of the zoo taken up by exhibits devoted to the island

Looking in the entryway a lot of ppl r carrying pamphlets n papers and speaking in foreign tongues like tourists or smth ig

Adam casts disguise self to make him look as fancy as everyone else

Has feathered cloak

Three major pathways

Chault exhibits for weird stuff r left

Marine stuff and some chault r forward

To the right r monsters from the interior continent

Adam cel and theo (?) go to the right

Most ppl r in pairs

A lot of biologist-type ppl; ppl who look like they're used to handling animals

First real exhibit on the right is a human woman inside the exhibit throwing down pieces of meat to lions

Is asyna a moon druid ? Yes

How did the human woman get there ? But she doesn’t notice

"does this zoo have dippin dots" - lillian 2020

Perception check, 15

There r ppl selling stuff, sees dejected gnome sitting under a pedal cart w a dingy umbrella and he's grumpy n angry

Adam walks over to him

Selling diff snacks n refreshments

He's mostly selling a fizzle pop

Strawberry flavor, blueberry, butterfly flavor

"are ur fizzle pops made w organic butterflies ? Bc I'm kinda on a diet rn"

Adam says it's disgusting

"I'll have a blueberry thank you"

Cel is gonna try the butterfly one

It's sweet; doesn't taste like blood but does taste almost nutty

So like what I would think pistachio tastes like

Fun size popsicle

Theo gets strawberry

They go to the next exhibit

A really vertical exhibit

Oneshot

Cel is gonna try and ride seahorse asyna but rolls a nat 1 for acrobatics and then a nat 1 for dex save

Smashes head on rim of the pool, bleeding out and unconscious

Healing words from adam

Climbs out of the pool

The water is now red

Three children on the other side of the pool

One of them gets really excited and pees when adam tells them that there's a chemical that turns pool water red

Asyna left the pool when the kid peed

Asyna leads everyone over to the hospital

Adam is gonna try and healing words fix cel

Cel is back to full health

One of the kids is crying scared when she finds out the water is blood

Theo is gonna go get the kids ?

Ok back to the zoo

There's a hippo exhibit

We go check it out

On the way there run into different typical zoo stuff

Apes

Monkeys

The younger ppl r around these exhibits

A lot of closed sections bc of weather like "don't worry next winter this animal will be back"

Alligators

Ringtails that r lemurs ringtail lemurs

Birds

Carefully curated trees that r uber high

Hawks and giant eagles

Oops my phone froze

Tap on the glass to say hi to the what now

Theo wants it to come say hi to her

Animal handling check, 10

Can't attract their attention but

The hippos

Asyna has speak with animals LMAO

Basically can't talk to worms

No more tapeworm talk :/

"Theo says hi . This is theo"

"everybody gangsta until they find out jacob thinks barney is a hippo" - dom 2020

Colombian drug lord one time built private zoos and the hippos broke out but now there's a hippo problem in colombia

Pablo escovar

Speak with animals is ten minutes

We're also probably fighting later

We're gonna talk to the hippos

Theo waves

One of them paddles over and tries to sniff

"hm . Can you eat it ?"

"pleaes don't"

I just remembered seaweed is not a plant it's an algae

This hippo does not have a name

Calls sister sister

"ask about juicy hippo gossip" - adam

"no but if I did I would share it"

Originally zoo was place for research

Anything else to ask hippos before we check out rare animals ?

The hippo floats away and we say bye

To the chault exhibits

Getting late but there r a lot more researchers

First exhibit has a lot of strange, unfamiliar trees

Monkeys w really big fluffy sideburns clustering around overhanging branches bc it's raining

Some of them r taking leaves and using them to keep the rain off

One of the monkeys hops off the branch

The sideburns actually extend into wings and it goes to another branch

"it's like the wizard of oz"

"adam what's the wizard of oz"

Flying monkeys

Adam walks over to a researcher and asks the most must-see

Woman who is probably from chault bc wearing strange woven beret w branches n stuff

Alien to anything they've seen

"I would point you in the direction of the behemoths"

"what are behemoths"

Adam rolls nature check

9, he doesn't know what a behemoth is

She is from chault

Behemoths r considered friends there

Asyna and aerana know where chault is

Everyone else just knows chault is v far away, almost like a nightmare story told to children

Described as a hellscape

"I'd sooner go to chault than-"

Asyna and aerana know chault is a massive island to the sw of the sword coast, home to v tropical, intensely humid climate w lots of rain + some invasions in the past but now things r opening up

We're gonna check out the behemoths

From a distance, this exhibit much larger than others, much more heavily excavated

Not so much walls as railing looking into a deep cavern

All manner of plant life brought in to accommodate the creatures

Huge lizard of some kind

Huge size category

Irl a horse is large

Humans and dwarves are medium

Exhibit says it's a macetail behemoth

Ground trembles w each step of the behemoth

Slow, ponderous

Gigantic armored lizard w tough plating on its back and spikes on the sides of its head w bony, protective coverings all over it

Massive swinging tail protruding bone swinging back and forth as it walks

Looks like that one dinosaur

We would call it an ankylosaurus

Things that go over my head : see description bullet points before this

Tail end of speak with animals

Asyna can turn into dinosaurs

"you look really cool do you have a name"

One of them looks up but doesn't really respond

Doesn't answer

Look for velociraptors

Gonna look at all the exhibits

Spirehorn behemoths

Faces almost look like shields

Triceratops

Alien to us tho

I can't believe that like as dom's explaining these everyone else can like ,, imagine it

Like that's crazy they see pictures inside their heads

Feathered behemoths

Occasionally jump around

Claws and walk around on two legs

Bloodspike behemoth

Stegosaurus, baby and two parents

Asyna can turn into a deinonychus

We have enough time for one more exhibit

We see a creature alone in its pen save for two researchers dropping treats in front of it, other has a pickaxe and is tapping the ground and scooping smth up trailing the creature and brushing it into a bin

Creature reflects rainbow of colors ? I think

Huge snail, has three eyestalks but they kind of droop down and have heavy spikes off each individual one

Cel reads description

Flail snail?

It's a big boi

Described not as a beast but as something that comes from a realm of earth

As it moves it excretes glass

Generally docile but if prodded r really dangerous bc the things it has r more weapons than eyes

Adam asks if it's a petting exhibit

The flail snail is just as slow as a regular snail

"that is the most disgusting magic resistance I've ever seen in my entire life" - jacob 2020

Everything starting to shut down

We realize we should probs skedaddle

Time to find loser boy

Rain has not stopped but has kinda calmed down

Heading straight to the wig shop

Lamps in the trades ward r lit

Brighter than what we've seen recently

Adam peers into the shop

Perception check

6, tries to get water off the window, looks empty

Theo's gonna pick the lock

25, it's a simple lock and theo gets it open easily

Shop is empty

Somewhat eerie for those without darkvision bc the mannequins

Cel will go and investigate the back room, door is locked

Theo tries opening again

23, opens easily

Immediately smells weird powder

A lot of the perfumes for preserving dyes n stuff kept back here

Cel makes a perception check

V organized, neat and tidy

Manhole cover in the back

Sewer system v advanced in waterdeep but also means there's a lot of it

A lot of ppl will build over sewer openings bc cheaper real estate

"sewer access authorized city officials only"

Adam rolls nat20 for boxes

Looking for anything necromancy related, licking things, doing all manners of investigation

Feels a small leather sack, pulls it out, kinda heavy

Opens it up, sees coins that are kind of heavier and thicker; not silver, 5 platinum pieces

Platinum is 10 gp each

Could take the platinums

Scry the money and sack

There are cupboards at the front desk

Necromancy considered suspicious, looked down upon

"ah . It's like watching anime ." - jacob 2020

"no, it's not like watching anime" - dom 2020

The art itself is not a crime but the things that occur in tandem w it r usually crimes

Discussing what to do in character

Cel insight check, 16

Earlier dom mentioned we're aware many ppl in waterdeep use the sewers to traverse unseen in the city; kinda suss the building was built on top of a sewer

Adam is borrowing aerana's warhammer

Adam hits the floor, leaves big dent and a v loud sound

Cel makes strength check w advantage w crowbar

Rolls a 12, can't get it open

Can sort of shift it up

Adam smashes a jar over the floor

Dex check, 5

Cloud of neon yellow sprays out like a cloud of dust and smoke, just the color

Covered in bright yellow dye

Theo tries lockpicking

23, lock is more difficult and takes a little longer, but eventually it opens

Once it's opened, the chains undo themselves and snake out on their own accord

It's just a dark hole

Can see a short drop that leads to a staircase

Adam holds lantern

Cel's just gonna go w adam at the front, pitch dark

Darkvision lets us see to some extent; everything is in grayscale

Lantern beam does help us see a little

Asyna closer to front as well

Leads to a room, 10' x 20'

Descending down short flight of stairs, room totally bare save for a barred door that u can see out of, also locked

Hear faintly some water

Theo rolls 23 for lockpicking

Door opens

Adam investigating room for secret door, tunnel, anything

Investigation check, 10 and 5 for investigation checks

Look around but room is barren

Nothing stashed anywhere, nothing to indicate a secret door or anything

Adam and cel step out, to immediate right extends for 10ish feet before merging into wall

Directly in front is water and like a sewer river flowing to the right

"are there any rats" "make a perception check" "nat 1"

To left, passage curves so hard to see but for at least 40 or so feet the pathway continues

Adam rolls another 5 for investigation check

We eventually get to a small stone bridge

I FORGOT I RESEARCHED THE SEWER SYSTEMS idk if I should bring it up I brought it up

A 15 intelligence check

Waterdeep's sewers are a subject of fascination for the city

You know the passageway like the one ur in often has arteries or iron doors set in them leading to different areas

Also know sometimes due to poor planning or smth some areas without walkways also have access tunnels

There's a bridge ? Nasty water under it

Over the bridge we go

Cel rolls a 22, plenty of damp areas around ,, no light in the passage, walking for a minute or so and w each step just hear a wet squelching noise; we're leaving behind wet, muddy footprints

No sign of recent mud in front of us

10 minutes go by and every once in a while pass side arteries w more sewage flowing in

This part seems relatively well planned

Can only go straight ? No other curvature in the path

Traveling south

"I'm gonna try and get that rat" - adam 2020

Adam picks up the rat for sleight of hand check

"you're able to grab up that rat pretty good" - dom 2020

Adam holds rat out to asyna and tells her to do her thing

"hey buddy"

"uh you have to cast your spell first"

"hey pal how's it going"

"let me go"

"uh we'll let you go if you answer some of our questions"

"don't even"

"no he's saying don't eat him"

"my friend here holding you is gonna take a big chomp of you if you don't answer our questions"

"have you seen anyone"

"don't know"

"I open my mouth"

"I kind of want to squeak" - marguerite 2020

Rat points north

Adam wants a piece of string to tie onto the rat like a leash

Adam is starting to feel short of breath after 10 minutes of walking

"that's either from the powder . Or the key"

Adam doesn't feel indigestion right now just that it's difficult to get air

Adam tries to tie a leash to the rat

Dex check

Nat1

Rat runs away

We go back the way we came, another 10 minutes, we pass three of those stone bridges

Cel investigation checks the dead end again, adam will give bardic inspiration

"Open sesame" - song

18, nothing there

It's a maze, we'll try naya

Adam takes out sack of platinum

Naya appears, looks around and shudders and bounds away

Following the deer

Naya is guiding back to where we originally where

Moving south again

Looks at passage back again passage then vanishes

Naya was standing on one of the bridges

First artery

It's a passage

We gotta wade through the sewer

Aerana readies weapon

Wading through, halflings get disgusting smth in their boots

Passage goes 20 ft before turning on a diagonal, turn onto passageway then it extends v far into distance

"adam's adding to the sewage right now probably" - jacob 2020

Adam's feeling lightheaded

Cel makes medicine check on adam

Rolls a 6, don't know what's wrong bud

Adam rolls around in the sewer water to get the powder off ??

I guess he is

Adam makes a constitution save, a 3

OH? OH NO

The yellow stuff is off but adam is smeared in shit

Did I make a good or bad decision

We keep going but adam feels better like fine like nothing's wrong

Oh no adam's gonna die it's like hypothermia where u feel super hot at first then u die

Passageway stretches on for awhile until coming across a rusty ironed door raised so that we'd have to step up to access it

Aerana makes perception check on the door, 20 not a nat

Hears people shouting and what appears to be a cat

Can't tell if the shouting is bad or not

Theo wrings out cape

Go up to the door, realize there's no lock; the entire lock has fallen out bc the door is so rusty

Adam checks door for traps, 12 investigation

Does not appear to be trapped, looks p old

Adam is in middle, cel towards back, aerana at front

About 25' ahead is a wider chamber and a door set into the wall, the areas are lit

We already walked through the rusty door

Massive screeching sound that came from the door when u opened it

Gotta b stealthy

Door to the right is unlocked

Adam opens the door open, looks like a storage room w different crates and sacks; bland

Some water barrels, adam pours it on himself; the rest of us also do it

Moving into room adjacent to passageway; triangle things in the wall has arrow stuff to make it easier to fire from but the room looks abandoned

Deeper in we go

Don't go that far but hit a wider room extending out 40'

Center of the room; at one point looks like there was a wall covering the room but has since collapsed; several ppl looking at us

Far corner opposite to us is an old halfling man in dark robes, clutching wound at chest, long gray braid down back staring at us as if he heard we were coming

In front of him are two smiling skeletons

It's the necromancer

The skeletons r also looking at us

They appear to be guarding him

In front of skeletons are three kenku looking at us

Bingbong is not one of the kenku

"I can explain" - adam

"we came down here and I was covered in shit and" adam casts pyrotechnics centered in between skeletons and kenku

Initiative

Aerana, 19

Cel, 17

Asyna, 15

Adam, 15

Theo, 9

Aerana

Holds attack, if kenku move within 5 ft of her she'll attack

Cel

Skeletons have bows and shortswords

Kenkus have shortswords

Will hold an action if attacked

Skeletons

Appear to b human skeletons, medium size

Lash out at kenku

One kenku able to parry away an attack, other skeleton slashes another kenku

Asyna

Attacks kenku closest to her, the one not hit

15, "what are you attacking with" "iiiiiiiii don't knowwwwwwwwwww"

Asyna turns into ape

Runs up to terrified kenku

Swings both times but it gets out of the way and hisses like a cat

Adam

Casts pyrotechnics on kenku

One passes, one fails

Failed one is blinded for next turn

Cutting words on the kenku by asyna

Kenku

Blind

Tries to escape, skeleton misses and kenku staggers away and starts feeling way along wall and runs into room west of where we are

Other one

Makes attack on skeleton, half of ribcage slashed but it's still standing

Other other one

Tries to attack ape, misses

Halfling

Stands up, tries to flee

Theo

Hits kenku that tried to get asyna, 5 damage

Has sneak attack, deals 12 damage

Arrow shot into neck, still alive but not for long

Aerana

13 damage to other kenku

"how do you want to do this"

Kenku drops dead

Skeleton turns smiling to aerana

Cel

15 to hit, 6 damage, dead

"how do you want to do this"

Pulls arrow back as far as she can "and I don't know if it's bingbong, but I'm gonna pretend it's bingbong and shoot it right through his eye socket"

"I want to keep bingbong as a pet" - jacob 2020

"kenku are sentient beings, that would be slavery" - dom 2020

Looking around we see the bodies of three other kenku and remains of two other skeletons

The skeletons attack aerana

One hits, 3 damage

Asyna

Goes into the room to follow the halfling and the kenku

Some kind of exit around

The blinded kenku is in here

Can reach halfling or kenku

Marguerite wants to hug the halfling

Athletics check to do it

Old man screams but asyna can hold him, unable to escape

Kenku still feeling around on the floor

Adam

Follows asyna

Gonna cast sleep

Kenku falls asleep

Yells over at the halfling

"can you call off your skeletons please"

Halfling

Loser boy's turn

I don't remember how to spell losser unless it's losser

Tries to escape asyna's grasp

"he does not escape your grasp"

Asyna rolls another athletics check

17, he does not escape

Theo

14 to hit, 16 damage

"how do you want to do this"

Arrow to the skull just goes really far in and the skull falls off as do misc bones

Aerana

Misses hit

Tries to thrust forward w sword but it drops and contracts, sword slipping through ribcage

Cel

19 to hit

8 damage, hits shoulder and arm falls off

Skeleton

Misses

Asyna

Waddles the halfling over to adam

Gives him a little squeeze

Adam

baned halfling

And cutting words

No cutting words nvm

Halfling

Asyna rolls a 25

Can't squirm out

"unhand me there are more of them there are more kenku"

Theo

"ok. Bye bye skeleton boy"

22 to hit

12 damage

"how do you want to do this"

Hits him in the smile; teeth knocked out and all of it collapses like a xylophone type noise as the bones hit the floor

Out of combat

Aerana ties up sleeping kenku

Adam casts charm person

Cel is gonna loot

Investigation check, 7

10 gold combined on the kenku; takes

Halfling is charmed to consider adam a dear old friend

Says he just finished work on his new purse; his fanny pack (basically)

Not sure we recognize the material

Adam says he knows who sent the kenku

"you have the stone"

"they stole it from me"

Says he randomly found a nice stone from a rat

Adam puts his hand on loser boy's shoulder and asks if he wants to work from home

Trying to convince loser boy to come with us

Declines

The purse is made out of elf skin

Bc it's supple

Adam trying to get a magical weapon out of loser boy

Has a potion that protects from necromancers

Persuasion check, 24

Goes into side closet

Damage resist potion

Aerana kills him

Wow are you ?? Desensitized ?? Are you desensitized or does it help not being able to see anything ever

Adam rummages through loser boy's desk

Investigation check, 15

False bottom to one of the desk drawers w 100 gold inside

Cel investigation checks loser boy, 13

Finds a little wand w a skull tip

Adam is gonna look at the purse

This bag is a faint gold

Adam shakes the kenku awake, wisdom 13 saving throw

Fails

Charm person

Making dog noises

"you want to take us to your friends"

"I don't know where they are"

"then let's just go back to your base"

"get back to base ? No one knows where that is"

Adam introduces himself, mentions bingbong

Gets theo and cel's names, mimics sound of a hammer hitting metal when asked his name

His name is bonk now

Asks asyna's name, asyna is still an ape

Big hairy git

Aerana says she'll trade information for her name

Adam swings warhammer into ground to threaten kinda

Adam makes 12 insight check

We don't recognize any of the voices he uses

Asks if we live in a hole

Asks if the house is nice

Copies adam's voice for the house boom

Adam asks if he knows about the puppet

"couldn't tell you if I knew"

Nat20 adam runs insight check across entire conversation

He's lying abt not knowing where his friends are

I DFJGSLGJS THAT'S WHAT I WAS SAYING ABT US STILL GIVING UP INFORMATION ASFKJAFD

Adam asks him why he was lying

Hear a voice we've never heard before

But this one in particular is bizarre and warped as if it's through some filter

"do you know what happens when you lie to me"

Adam

Anyone w passive perception over 9 hears a bottle break and a door slam in one of the rooms to the south

Cel hits his brain basically

Some of you starting to piece together that smth strange is happening

Pattering of footsteps from room to the south

Session over for the night

#i'll fix these later i swear #sn #11 #dnd #d&d #wdh #i'm gonna fight #salty

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