#I'll be honest I'm not particularly happy with this but I like what I did with eskel's nose and scars

[kiiwiigii]

Love 

Demetri x Fem!Reader 

Summary: Stupid mushy, romantic love-making. 

Warnings: 

NSFW 18+ 

Smut 

Oral (F. Recieving)

Word Count: 1.6k+ 

Requested?: For Kinktober! 

Ooooh slow and romantic high heels and demetri would be fantastic like with the kissing up the leg trope you see in movies 

A/N: This is sickeningly mushy. You're welcome. 

The night had been a whirlwind. I was never a huge fan of the balls that the Masters were so big on throwing, but with Demetri by my side, it was tolerable. Well, more than tolerable, but I wasn't going to tell him that. 

"Darling." 

Speak of the devil. I looked up from my glass of wine to see my mate, handsome in his suit and bow tie, one of the few vampires in a more up-to-date outfit. He was a sight for sore eyes. Being a part of the elite guard he had quite a bit of schmoozing to do with the guests, while I was more of an observer. 

He gave me a cheeky grin as he appeared next to me, leaning in and placing a kiss on the pulse point on my neck. 

"Excuse me, sir." I raised a brow at him. "My lips are up here." 

His grin widened and he leaned in, kissing me softly. My eyes fluttered shut as I reached up to pull him closer by the back of his neck. I was sure that happiness was practically radiating off of me. 

Demetri pulled back and booped my nose with his. 

"You look ravishing, darling." 

"I think that's the third time you've told me that tonight, Demetri." I giggled. 

"Because it's true. Do you ever tire of hearing it?" 

I paused a moment, pretending to think. "No." 

Demetri rolled his eyes, his grin replaced by a soft smile as he looked me over. I couldn't help the blush that spread across my cheeks. Demetri may be a goofball outside of his official duties but there is also another side of him, a more protective and romantic side. 

Like most of the Volturi, Demetri didn’t particularly care for humans, that is until he found me. 

"It's getting late, my love. Perhaps it is time to retire." He murmured in my ear, and I looked up at him confused. 

"As much as I would like that, don't you need to stay here a little longer?" 

"No. I've done my duties for the night, and you are more important than any of this." He waved his hand as if he was already bored. 

And perhaps he was. 

I relaxed, and nodded my head, letting him lead me out of the ballroom with his hand on the small of my back. We nodded to the vampires on guard duty as we swept out into the hall, and Demetri's hand left my back to grasp my hand, lifting it to place a kiss on the back of it. 

The walk back was slow and easy, both of us relishing the other's company as the night wound down. I was tired, and my feet hurt from the heels that Heidi had shoved me into. Demetri seemed to notice my predicament because before I knew it, he had swept me off my feet and continued onwards to our room. 

"I can walk, you know." 

"I know." 

I shook my head in exasperation, too tired, and if I was being honest, lazy to fight him on it. Besides, I quite enjoyed being carried around. Although I would never breathe a word of it to Demetri, I'm sure he suspected it. 

When we reached our room he sat me down on the bed carefully, kissing my forehead gently before pulling away. 

"I'll go run a bath for you, darling." 

Demetri disappeared, and less than a moment later I heard the bath water running. 

I stood carefully, shimmying my way out of my dress, and getting ready to shuck off my heels when I heard Demetri's voice behind me. 

"Did I ever tell you how good you look in just lingerie and heels?" 

I turned around to find him looking me up and down with darkened eyes, his stare lingering on my red heels. I felt the hot blush rise to my cheeks, my arms wrapping around myself, embarrassed. 

"I think you missed your calling, darling." He purred, stepping closer. 

"Oh? And what is that?" I quirked a brow at him. 

Demetri stepped closer, crowding me against the bed. His hands moved to rest on my hips as he leaned forward, his lips brushing against my ear. 

"I think you should have been a model, my love." He purred, his voice dropping low. "You have a natural beauty that is unmatched." 

I couldn't help but giggle. "Now you're being ridiculous, Demetri." 

"Ridiculous?" He laughed softly, his grip tightening. "You are the most beautiful thing I have ever seen, my love. I cannot imagine my life without you." 

He leaned in then, lips ghosting over mine as he tugged me close. I moaned softly, reaching up to drape my arms over his shoulders. His hands ran down my back, cupping my ass as he brought me in closer. I could feel his hardness against my stomach, and I whimpered, pressing closer. 

"Your bath is almost ready, darling." 

"I can think of something better than a bath. And I think you can too." 

Demetri growled, his grip tightening. He kissed me then, pushing me gently backward onto the plush bed. I giggled as he took one of my ankles in his hands, and proceeded to slowly kiss his way up my leg, little by little, until he reached my thighs… 

I shivered as he nosed my panties aside and his tongue flicked out, tasting me, and I gasped when his tongue slipped inside of me. I could feel his smile against my skin, and I moaned, pressing closer.  

Demetri was relentless, his tongue swirling around my clit as his thumb brushed over my bundle of nerves. I could feel myself getting close, and I whimpered, arching up to meet his gaze. 

Then, without warning, he pulled away, and I moaned in disappointment. 

"Demetri, please." 

"Patience, my love." He chuckled, his hands moving to rest on my hips as he looked up at me. "I have just begun to tease you." 

"You're killing me here." 

"I suppose I am." He grinned, leaning in to kiss me. "But I promise, I will make it up to you." 

His deft fingers found their way into my pussy then, the coolness sending shivers through me. 

He slowly stroked me, his fingers seeming to find every single spot that made me gasp. I could feel my wetness seeping out of me, coating his fingers as he fucked me slowly with his hand. 

I moaned then, arching off the bed as his thumb found my clit, pressing against it, rolling it between his fingers. I could feel the orgasm building inside me yet again, and I whimpered, my hands grasping the sheets as I ground myself against his hand, willing the coil to unravel in that delicious way I was so desperate for. He chuckled, kissing me deeply, his tongue languid and slow, moving against mine in a sensual mimicry of what his fingers were doing. 

"Please, Demetri." I whined, nearly writhing beneath him. 

He didn't reply, choosing to increase his pace instead, his thumb flicking my clit faster. With a gasp, I came then, warmth flooding through me and I shuddered, my nails digging into his back as I rode out the waves of my orgasm.  

"That's it, Y/N." He whispered. "Come for me, darling." 

I collapsed against the bed then, a sated puddle of goo. Demetri chuckled; his breath warm against my skin as he kissed me slowly. 

"We're not done here yet, darling." 

I started to grin, but I moaned when I felt the head of his cock pressing against my entrance. 

"Please, baby." I whimpered as he slowly began to press into me, stretching me to accommodate him. When I was finally spread around his cock I sighed, sinking into the bed. 

"That's it, love." He groaned, his grip on my hips tightening. "God, you feel good." 

I shivered, moaning as he began to thrust into me slowly, my legs automatically wrapping around his waist, my heels digging into his back. I could feel him stretching me out, rubbing against my g-spot in just the right way that had me seeing stars. 

"You feel so good, Demetri." I gasped, my hands grasping his shoulders. 

"I exist to give you pleasure my love." He murmured, his lips brushing against my neck. "That is all I am, that is all I have ever been." 

"You give me so much more, Demetri." I breathed as he thrust into me again. 

"This is everything to me, Y/N. I am yours, always." 

Who knew that visiting Italy would lead to a life such as this? To finding a love like this? 

I could feel Demetri nuzzling against my throat before his teeth sunk into the skin there, the sharp pain just enough to send me over the edge. I cried out, eyes widening in surprise and my walls clenching around his cock as my orgasm hit me like a freight train out of nowhere.  

Demetri grunted, his hips grinding into mine as he found his release as well. His body shivered, and I could feel his breath against my throat, his tongue flicking out to lick the beads of blood that ran from the wound he had left behind. 

Why was I not turning? Had he sucked the venom out without me knowing? My thoughts were running rampant before Demetri caught my attention. 

"I sucked the venom out, love. Don't worry." 

His grip loosened on my hips, and he pulled away, his eyes resting on me lovingly. 

"Mmm. I never get tired of seeing you like this." He purred, kissing me slowly. "You are so beautiful." 

"And you're biased." I murmured, smiling. 

"Perhaps." 

He leaned down and kissed me again before pulling away abruptly. 

"Shit." 

He disappeared and I sat up in confusion. 

"Demetri?" 

His head poked out from the bathroom door and that's when I also realized that he was still dressed. Forget turning. I furrowed my eyebrows and opened my mouth to ask him how on earth he still had clothes on when he cut me off, looking rather sheepish. 

"We may have flooded our bathroom, darling." 

{Kinktober} // {Masterlist}

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#demetri volturi x reader #demetri volturi #demetri volturi smut #twilight #the twilight saga #kinktober #kinktober 2023

[toomuchracket]

angsty part two hmm. well maybe it can have something to do with whatever the heck was going on at electric umbrella studios. maybe girly is there helping out bea (we can pretend maybe she’s doing stuff with jack and not matty for ease of everyone’s heart lmao) then there is that little listening party or whatever where taylor and matty are seen together but maybe girly’s heart couldnt stand to stick around for very long so she leaves early. maybe in this dream matty pulls his head out of his ass and decides he will do anything and be anything that girly wants him to be because this thing with taylor is not doing it for him either

ok! edited the request slightly. and it doesn't have a happy ending because actually i'm a messy bitch who lives for drama. please note: THIS ISN'T ACTUALLY CANON IN THE D WORD UNIVERSE IT'S JUST A COLLECTIVE NIGHTMARE. ok. lol. happy new year. enjoy <3

gone four weeks, part 2 (d word matty x reader angst)

“oh my god, hi! you came! oh, thank you so much!” taylor pulls you into a hug, which you reciprocate warmly; you've no problem with her, after all. “and you look amazing! your hair! those shoes! it's a new look for you. i like it.”

you smile. “thank you, i just fancied a bit of a change. and thank you for inviting me! i was so touched when i got your message.”

“matty said it was your favourite of my albums - i couldn't not have you here.”

what the fuck?

“oh, he did?” you try to keep your face and voice steady. “that was nice of him.”

taylor nods. “it was the first thing he said when i first wondered if anyone would even come to a 1989 listening party - you would, if you were around. thank god margaret ran into you last week and told me you were!”

you murmur a “yeah”, in response, too busy reeling from the sudden emotional pain in your heart to reply properly. blinking a couple of times, you look back towards the front door of the studio to see more people coming in. “taylor, i'll catch up with you later, yeah? let you speak to… oh my god, i'm at the same party as kendrick lamar? fucking hell.”

she laughs, squeezing your arm. “no worries, babe. i'll see you later! matty’s… somewhere, if you want to catch up with him”.

not bloody likely. “cool. see you!”

you smile politely at kendrick, who returns it (!!), before heading off into the busy room. there are people you recognise absolutely everywhere you turn, but nobody you really know, more just celebrities you'd be worried about embarrassing yourself in front of. no sign of jack, or margaret, or even matty - not that you particularly want to see him, to be honest, but a familiar face (one not from your tv screen, that is) would definitely calm you down.

of course, so would a cigarette.

pulling your cigs and lighter from your bag, you nudge the side door open with your hip and step out into the alleyway and still-warm evening air. and then, almost immediately, you wish you hadn't. because, standing with his back to you - although that makes no difference, you'd know those back muscles and that head of hair anywhere - is matty, talking to jack and margaret, all three of them smoking.

fuck. this was an awful idea. but you can't turn back to go inside now, because jack's clocked you; he’s beaming, waving at you, shouting “sprout! get over here and smoke with us!”

despite yourself, you smile, wandering over and allowing yourself to be enveloped in a hug from the man and his fiancée. “wish you'd stop bloody calling me that, jack.”

“never,” jack replies, kissing your head as he releases you into margaret's arms. “you're sprout, and he's cabbage.”

“whatever - hi, mags,” you kiss your friend's cheek as she breaks apart and settles her arm around your waist, before reluctantly meeting your ex's gaze. you're irritated to see that he looks good. like, really good, something-twinging-between-your-legs good. get a grip! “matthew.”

“alright?” matty smiles at you, but it doesn't reach his eyes. “almost didn't recognise you. hair's shorter.”

you shrug. “wanted something different.”

“sounds like you.”

the snide comment slices through you. unlike last time, though, you don't tear up; you fire right back at him. “well, i'm at an age where i can afford to experiment.”

matty frowns, while jack and margaret burst into giggles. the latter kisses the side of your head. “god, you’re funny. i can't believe you were in the city all this time and you didn't tell us! i miss hanging out with you.”

“i was busy,” you place a cigarette between your lips, shaking hands trying and failing to successfully operate the lighter. matty wordlessly steps forward and does it for you - your cheeks burn as much as the cig does. “thank you.”

“don't,” matty waves it off, taking a long drag of his own cig before looking at you again. “so. you haven't been back home?”

“not since the last time you saw me,” you ash the cig, pointedly looking down at the ground. “there hasn't been any work for me to do, so there's nothing keeping me there, really.”

matty scoffs. “typical, you prioritising your job.”

“well, it's what you pay me for. you should be happy i care so much about my career, really, matty,” you smile, saccharine as summer peaches, before turning to jack and margaret. “anyway, how's wedding planning going?”

jack breaks into an excited soliloquy that you can only half focus on, hoping you're timing the oohing and aahing and awwing at his fiancée’s enthusiastic interjections right; most of your attention, you hate to say, is focused on the man opposite you, clearly - to you, at least - upset. the familiar guilt begins to gnaw at your ribcage, and you're thankful when margaret checks her watch and begins to usher you back inside.

matty, though, has other ideas. he touches your elbow, so lightly you barely feel it, and yet your body reacts as if he's punched you. “can i talk to you alone for a minute?”

panicked, you turn towards jack, who nods. “you still have a few minutes. i just need to go in to set up. see you in there!”

shit.

once you're alone with your ex, you move to brace yourself against the wall, folding your arms. “what?”

“why didn't you tell me you were in new york?”

“why would i?”

“well,” matty's voice falters; when he speaks again, it's almost a whisper. “i don't know. maybe we could've, like, gone for a drink. or you could've come down here to hang out.”

“again, why would i?” you tilt your head. “no offence, mate, but hanging out with my ex and his new girlfriend isn't exactly my idea of a fun time. or just hanging out with my ex full stop.”

“thanks for that,” matty grimaces.

you sigh. “look, i know you well enough to be able to read your cryptic fucking subtext. i've been alright, matty, i really have. i've been with friends.”

“you don't have any friends in new york.”

“and how the fuck would you know that? honest to fucking god,” you snap. “i didn't tell you everything about me…”

“i know that well enough.”

“...but, if you must know, one of my friends from home opened an exhibition in tribeca. orla.”

matty nods. “we went to her london opening together before… us, didn't we?”

the memory feels distant, as if from another life, but it hurts all the same. “yeah.”

“i would've liked to have gone to her show here, too. she's good.”

you smile genuinely for the first time, pride for your friend stronger than the fucked up pot of feelings you have towards matty. “it was really something. i helped set it up, actually. was fun.”

“really?” matty laughs; something cracks inside you when he does. “yeah, i can see you being good at that, actually.”

you look at the ground, still smiling, but less now. “been thinking about switching to it full-time. curation and stuff.”

“oh,” matty sounds crestfallen. you peek up at him to find that he looks it, too. “well… if that's what you want to do, i s'pose you should look into it,” he checks the time on his phone, while your heart sinks impossibly deeper. “it's starting soon. i'll head in now, and then if you-”

“wait thirty seconds before i follow you? yeah, i know the drill,” you smile lifelessly. “least you won't have to worry about that if i get a new job, yeah? you'll likely never have to see me again, let alone risk being seen with me.”

“i- anyway,” matty clears his throat, turning quickly away from you. “i should go.”

“okay,” the door closes behind him before you can even get the second syllable out, and there you are, alone again, in the suddenly-cold night air. you shakily exhale your cigarette for the last time, stubbing it out on the wall and stamping the butt with your high heel for good measure; once no trace of the flame remains, you go back inside.

for the rest of the night, part of you wishes you hadn't bothered. while hearing your favourite album is truly, genuinely brilliant, the experience is marred somewhat by your ex sitting in the seat opposite yours with taylor's head on his shoulder: you can't quite lipsync along to this love or clean or you are in love without your lips beginning to tremble, the new song now that we don't talk genuinely makes you nauseous when you figure out the lyrics, and actually hearing matty's voice on a vault track is painful beyond words.

but still, you clap, you fake smiles, you cheer for taylor and jack and the work they've put into the production. it's not easy, though, and you're thankful for the distraction when your phone buzzes with an invitation while you're alone at the drinks table grabbing another champagne.

“now i know you're not about to entertain a man who sent you an i miss you, come over text,” taylor’s voice sounds scandalised from behind you.

you turn, grinning, smile dropping slightly when you see she isn’t alone. “don't worry, i'm taking the piss out of him for it as we speak…”

“good.”

“...but i am gonna go and see him, in a minute,” you finish, looking down at your phone and giggling when you see a reply. “if that's alright, that is.”

matty raises his eyebrows the way he does before he opens his mouth, but taylor beats him to it. “look at you giggling at him! of course! go! but first,” she gently drags you to a nearby sofa and settles onto it, patting the seat beside her; you take it, while matty awkwardly settles himself on a footstool in front of you both. “tell me about him.”

“you really want to know?” you aren't quite sure which of them the question is directed at. taylor nods, and judging by matty's expression he's also curious, so you sigh and keep talking. “well, his name is michael. he's a playwright. we met through friends. he's lived in new york his whole life. he seems slightly obsessed with me, but in a good way - so far, at least. he's very sweet.”

“a playwright? that's cool,” taylor grins. “what does he look like?”

“a bit like andrew garfield, actually,” you laugh, looking down at your phone again. “and he's offering to meet me at a bar, so it's probably time for me to be on my way.”

“sure. have fun, stay safe,” she pulls you into a hug; you see matty wince, out of the corner of your eye. “thank you so much for coming. when do you go back home?”

“not until the end of the month. i don't know if i'm actually going on the festival run, yet,” you shrug. “but i'll go home before it, just in case.”

“it's a lot, isn't it?”

taylor, babe, you don't even know the half of it. “yeah. it won't be easy.”

she hums. “we should hang out before you go. nothing crazy, just dinner or drinks or something. like, something fun, before you have to go back to keeping a record label running,” she nudges matty, who smiles quickly but continues looking at the floor. “i'll call you, okay?”

“that sounds good,” you stretch. “right, i really should go - the bar is a twenty-minute walk from here and i said i'd meet michael in fifteen.”

matty tuts. “he's knowingly letting you walk alone to meet him at half ten at night? no. absolutely not.”

you roll your eyes. “for god's sake, i'll be fine. i'm an adult!”

“yeah, babe, but still,” taylor’s eyes are wide. “take a car! for our peace of mind, at least.”

our. you do your best not to shudder, and smile instead. “if you're sure…”

“she's sure,” matty nods. “get it to take you back to your… whatever it is you're staying in after your drink, too.”

“i mean, i'm going back to his,” you look matty dead in the eye when you say it, and the sadness that fills his is impossible to miss. christ, what is his deal? “but thanks. anyway,” you hug taylor before you stand. “thanks again for tonight. i'll see you soon,” you nod at matty. “and i'll… see you at finsbury, definitely. maybe sooner. i don't know. there'll be an email soon confirming what's happening. bye.”

much to your chagrin, matty stands too. “i'll walk you out. make sure you actually get in the car - i know what you're like.”

for fuck's sake. “alright. bye, taylor!” you wave as you move towards the door.

“bye, babe!”

you walk quickly through the corridors, trying to keep some distance between you and matty. annoyingly, though, he matches your pace, and speaks. “so… michael.”

the vitriol practically drips from his tongue. you scoff. “what about him?”

“tell me more about him. what’s he like?”

“he's my age,” you pointedly don’t look at matty when you say that, but you hear the way his breath catches in his throat. the guilt begins gnawing again; you keep talking to distract yourself from it. “he's ridiculously american, which means he doesn't get my sense of humour sometimes, but as soon as he found out i lived in london he took the piss and started calling me ‘princess’.”

the word leaves your mouth before you can stop it; as soon as it does, you bite the insides of your lips together, guilt spreading to every bone in your body. tentatively, you look round at matty, who's stopped walking in favour of looking at the ground and clasping his hands behind his neck. everything about him radiates hurt, and it only worsens when he quietly speaks. “he calls you what?”

you can't bring yourself to say it again. “you heard me, matty.”

“wish i fucking hadn't,” your ex looks up at you again, and you know he's about to verbally lash out; he looks exactly the same as he did before you split. “you really let him call you that? my name for you?”

“think you lost all rights to that the day you dumped me, to be honest, mate.”

“fucking hate it when you call me that. stop it.”

“well, i'm sure as shit not going to resort to what i used to call you, am i?”

matty laughs mirthlessly. it's the worst sound you've ever heard. “no, you've got michael for that now.”

“no, i haven't,” you're loathe to admit what you're about to say, but you really want him to feel bad. “haven't slept with him yet - or anyone, for that matter, since you broke up with me,” you glance at matty, who looks rightfully sheepish, and decide to just fuck with him even further. “but maybe i will tonight. s'about time i felt good about myself.”

“you know, you've been really fucking snide today. i don't know what i've done to deserve it.”

you stop dead in your tracks, turning to face him in total bewilderment. “well, aside from the whole, y'know, dumping me at the first sign of disagreement, you fucking started it with the arsey comments today, matty. sounds like you? fuck off.”

he shrugs. “but it does. you don't want what i want, so… why bother keeping this going?”

you huff, pushing the door to the staircase open. “i never said i didn't want to get married and have kids, by the way.”

“what? yes you-”

“no, i didn't,” you smile sadly. “all i said was that i was unsure, and because it wasn't me immediately saying yes to something for the first time in our relationship, you took it as a no.”

matty's shaking his head. “no, that-that's not-”

“yes it is, sweetheart,” the tears are beginning to prick at your eyes; matty's too, you can see. “that's what happened.”

“but you freaked out so much…”

“because you sprung it on me, out of the blue! come on, matty,” you can feel your jaw trembling. “you would've done the same, if a partner had asked you that question when you were my age.”

matty sniffles. “please stop bringing up the age gap, darling.”

the pet name enrages you; it's agonising how natural it sounds coming from his lips, and even more painful how automatically your body reacts to it. “well, i can't not, given that it's what fucked us up, in the end,” you take a deep breath, and walk out the side door onto the street. it's fairly quiet, you're relieved to see. “besides - i thought you liked it? that was my appeal, wasn't it? being young, and pretty, and naive, so fucking naive. a meek little toy, something you could play with however you wanted without fear of it rebelling against what you wanted. because that's really all that matters, isn't it, what you want? course it is, because when that was threatened, you stopped wanting me.”

hot tears are hitting your cheeks with increasing speed, but your voice somehow stays strong, unwavering, controlled; the same can't be said for matty, who's crying just as much as you. “no, no, that's not true, not at all, please don't say that.”

“but that's what it feels like,” your voice cracks into a sob. “you didn't even want to talk to me about it. you were just... fine with letting me go. i didn't think you could ever be so cruel to someone you claim to have loved, once, matty. especially not someone who loves you as much as i do,” sniffling, you wipe your eyes and open a car door, quickly telling the driver the address of the bar before turning back to matty. “i appreciate you getting taylor to invite me tonight, but i think it was a mistake; we can't be friends, you and i, we really can't. i'm sorry, it just… hurts,” you check the time. “i need to go. take care.”

it's too warm in the car. you roll the window down slightly. you can hear matty crying from halfway down the street.

#i'm very sorry #mads muses #mads does writing #d word matty #matty asks #angst asks #matty healy fanfiction #matty healy fanfic #matty healy fic #matty healy angst #matty healy x reader #matty x reader

[ingravinoveritas]

I just want to say I love your blog- I came across it last night and completely went down the rabbit hole and completely convinced of the MS/DT love. I wanted to know what you thought of this video

https://www.tiktok.com/t/ZT8p7x9jV/

Even the mere mention of his name that is not appearing to be about Michael Sheen, David makes it about him and lights up. What do you think about how David reacts in interviews, shows etc where either David brings him up on his own or he comes up and he reacts? I see his demeanor change almost instantly. I feel that people don’t see as much of this coming from David and even though it’s not as obvious as Michael, it’s really there.

Hi there! Well thank you so much for the kind words about my blog--I'm always happy to know folks like what I am doing and are enjoying my ridiculous posts. I really appreciate it!

That video you linked to is a great one, and one I have talked about previously on my blog. I'll put my gifs up here so we have a visual reference:

The first thing (of course) that stood out to me was this random fan mentioning his friend, and immediately David thought of Michael. Because there are a lot of Michaels in the world, after all. Michael Caine. Michael Myers. George Michael, even. And yet David's mind went straight to Michael Sheen--his Michael--and that seems so telling.

I also have a tag on my blog for the many instances of David and Michael bringing each other up when the other isn't there, as that is also one of my favorite things. There are a lot of wonderful examples there, but I think one that is really worth checking out is a podcast David was on two years ago with fellow actor Paapa Essiedu. Paapa brought up Michael earlier in the interview, but later on it's David who brings him up, and there is such impossible fondness in his voice when he talks about him.

(I think this also ties into something I've discussed a few times on my blog, which is David feeling more comfortable opening up when doing an audio interview where we can't see him, versus a video interview where we can. A supposition that rings particularly true in the case of David's own podcast episode where he interviewed Michael in 2019.)

One of the most memorable things David said in the interview with Michael is, "You're an honest version of how I'm feeling." Five years ago, this seemed especially true because David was so much more reserved than Michael--less obvious, as you said--but in no way did that mean his feelings were less strong. What we see now in David's reactions when Michael is brought up--that shift in demeanor, that complete softness he emanates in a way he doesn't with others--is the externalization of something that was always there on the inside.

In that vein, I want to make sure your second Ask doesn't go unaddressed, as the NTAs are another vivid example of David's softness around Michael, and to date, still one of the most special nights in the fandom. I've written about a lot of my thoughts on it in detail, so I invite you to check out my #NTA Awards 2021 tag for a whole lot of analysis and discourse.

I hope this helps to answer your questions. Thanks for writing in! x

#killerqueen-82 #reply post #david tennant #soft scottish hipster gigolo #michael sheen #welsh seduction machine #david is definitely more subtle than Michael #but he knows how to speak volumes without saying a word #one very visible example is how often he physically leans in to Michael #which we don't seem to see him do with a lot of people #he seeks comfort from Michael #so much warmth and affection #beautiful #a friendship that's become something more #i don't know if i believe in fate but i believe in them #basingstoke comic con 2023 #ineffable lovers #discourse #gifs by me

[bluerose5]

Zevran & Astarion Banter Pt. 6/?

Of course I had to make one about everyone's favorite topic. 💙

[First] [Prev] [Next]

...

Zevran: How do you make it look so easy?

Astarion: Excuse me?

Zevran: Picking locks! Sometimes, you make it look as easy as breathing. Then again, Tav does give you all of the best tools for the job.

Astarion: *scoffs* You're adorable, you know. Have you ever considered that it's not the equipment that's the problem, but it's more so a matter of your skill?

Zevran: Someone, quick, alert the guards! There has been a murder!

Astarion: I'm simply calling it as I see it, darling.

Zevran: I'll have you know that my hands are most talented in many things.

Astarion: Of that, I have no doubt, my dear, but lockpicking isn't one of them.

...

Zevran: Astarion, my gorgeous, darling, precious—

Astarion: As much as I adore all of this mindless praise, is this conversation actually going anywhere?

Zevran: Yes. As a matter of fact, how would you like to make a friendly wager?

Astarion: I won't promise anything until I've heard the terms first, so go on. I'm listening.

Zevran: If I open this chest over here on my first try, then you give me a bottle of that latest perfume you've been trying out. I'll even use my own tools to get the job done.

Astarion: Huh, someone is feeling particularly bold today. Alright then, and when I win, what will be my reward?

Zevran: That is entirely up to you. I can be quite flexible.

Astarion: Then, what about a kiss?

Zevran: Is that what you want?

Astarion: Would I have asked if it wasn't?

Zevran: Knowing what I do about you, do you really want an honest answer to that question?

Astarion: *sighs* No to the brutal honesty. Yes, I want the kiss. Happy now?

Zevran: Delighted!

Astarion: Would that be okay with you?

Zevran: Yes, why wouldn't it be?

Astarion: Hmph. Guess you better get ready to pucker up then. It's not like you'll actually get the chest o—

[Zevran uses his tools, and the chest flies open.]

Astarion: ...

Zevran: Ah, that was a tough one.

Astarion: Zevran, you cheeky bastard!

Zevran: Yes, hi, that is me!

Astarion: Did you just swindle me?!

Zevran: No, I would never.

Astarion: Have you've been downplaying your skills all this time?!

Zevran: Only so I could get to watch you work in my place. It is quite a sight, truly.

Astarion: How are you this lovely yet so infuriating at the same time?

Zevran: It's a talent. A burden I must carry.

Astarion: One you will be carrying all the way back to camp if you want that bottle.

Zevran: Disappointed about not winning the kiss?

Astarion: No... Maybe. Yes. Gods, you're lucky you're so cute, or I'd wring your neck.

Zevran: Promise?

Astarion: Ugh.

#baldur's gate 3 #bg3 #dragon age origins #dragon age #zevran arainai #zevran #astarion ancunin #astarion #zevstarion #bluerose headcanons #bluerose writes

[snakeeyesdraws]

can you do more Mario scenes? I really enjoyed your first post xD

Yes of course! I'm so glad you did, and I'd be more than happy to do some more posts about Mario game scenes!

Now, originally I had thought to keep it to more obscure games, or at least games that aren't talked about as much, like Super Mario 3d world. But I'm very stressed and exhausted at the moment, and I'm indulging with one of my favourite Mario games, so perhaps....

Overly Analyzing Luigi's Mansion 3; Mario Rescue cutscene

All screenshots taken from this video (hence the watermark, sorry, I cant record it myself)

So, in order to rescue Mario, the player has to defeat the hotel owner, Hellen Gravely in her office. Each boss ghost has their own unique animation before being sucked into the Poltergust G-00, and hers is to demand Luigi pause long enough for her to apply her make up. Queen moment, if I'm to be honest.

Luigi also has a celebration animation after he defeats ghosts and bosses, and here he tosses his hat off in celebration. It's such a cute moment; he's been constantly terrified in this haunted hotel, but he's so proud of himself for conquering this particularly scary obstacle!

Now, the main reason I'm looking at this scene today. Luigi uses the Dark-Light feature of the Poltergust to rescue Mario from the portrait he was trapped in. Said portrait was hanging up in Hellen's office, and she used it to taunt Luigi to come fight her to save his brother, I should add.

Mario falls from the painting and is seemingly dazed and confused at first. Unlike in the first game, the portraits here are frozen, unmoving images, so it takes Mario a moment of checking out his body and arms to realize he's free.

The second he looks up at Luigi, though, he instantly lights up. I recommend you check out the scene for yourself, because the way he bounces up and stretches his arms out as he goes "OH YEAH!" is so cute and expressive. They really outdid themselves with the cutscenes in this game.

Mario runs over to Luigi, exclaiming "Way to go, Luigi!" and his joyful energy is immediately returned by Luigi. Luigi spreads his arm, happily exclaiming "Mario!" while Mario jumps into his arms and just. Look at them.

Look at them.

(I had to find a gif of this specific moment because screenshots would not do it justice)

I can't even begin to describe how happy this makes me. Mario jumping right into Luigi's arms like it's so natural and common for them to do, Luigi's leg lifting up as he catches Mario, Luigi holding Mario up for a split second, Luigi's loud "MARIO, hey bro!" it's so tender and wholesome. This is the kinda sibling energy I wanna see with them!

There's so much display and affection and trust on display here in just a few seconds of animation. And there's just something about Luigi being the one to do the hug lifting that's just, so cute. Chefs kiss, no notes, perfect scene.

Luigi sets Mario back down on his feet, and I love that this shot allows us to see Mario's perspective. While this is overall a very joyful and upbeat scene, I think it's nice to also show Mario getting some much needed comfort after his third time being rescued from a portrait in the Luigi's Mansion series, poor guy.

Very briefly, before they step back, Luigi is also shown patting Mario's back with his hand. Again, even though Luigi has navigated this hotel scared out of his mind, the fact that he's shown to be consciously giving his brother some show of comfort is adorable.

Luigi steps back and they both laugh, Mario placing his hand on Luigi's shoulder. They're both equally happy to be reunited! Smaller note, but Luigi appears to be ever so slightly bending his knees, probably to be closer to Mario. Yes the height difference between them really isn't that noticeable, but I'll take what I can get, okay?

For a second, the scene lingers as they simply stare at each other in relief. Then Luigi seems to snap back to it, having a small "wait a minute-" moment as he looks at the camera.

Immediately, Mario's smile drops too, and his hand drops off Luigi's shoulder as he straightens up. You can tell Luigi kinda forget where they were for a moment, probably because of how relieved he was to see Mario again, and now he's remembering that oh yeah, they're kinda stuck in a haunted hotel with a giant Boo that specifically has it out for them.

Luigi grabs Mario by the shoulder and exclaims, "Come on! This way!" clearly referring to Professor E Gadd's lab.

A bit of context for those who haven't played the game; before rescuing Mario, the player rescues the three Toads who also accompanied them on the vacation trip to the hotel, and every time Luigi escorts them to the elevator so they can stay in E Gadd's lab, safe and sound from the ghosts. So we can infer Luigi's immediate thought was to also get Mario there, so he wouldn't be in danger anymore :'3

He keeps his arm on Mario's shoulder, and grabs his other hand to literally start leading him in the direction of the elevator. Which is just.... so precious. Literally "I just got you back and you are not leaving my side until I know you're safe" energy. They care so much about each other guys. I love protective big bro Mario with all my heart, but protective Luigi fretting and worrying over Mario's wellbeing is so special too.

However, unlike the Toads who were more than happy to stay in the safer lab, Mario has other plans.

While wiggling out of Luigi's gripe, Mario corrects him with "Ah ah, ah ah, this way!" and pulls him back into the office. Luigi's confused, and his hand reflexively almost reaches for the Poltergust since they're heading back in the direct of danger (or it could just be his arm swinging back from Mario's pull, but again, over analyzing.)

The camera pans over to reveal the wall with the portrait Mario was trapped in on it.

Mario turns back to Luigi, clearly gung-ho and ready to go. We don't see much of Luigi's face, but I like to think he had an "oh no, not this again-" expression, because he knows exactly what Mario is about to do.

Mario gestures over his shoulder with a "Come on!" and takes off, leaving Luigi to startle and raise his hand. Here we get their classic dynamic; Mario, head strong and determined, running recklessly right into the action, and Luigi, timid and cautious, taking a moment to really sit and think about the situation.

Mario throws himself at the sliding wall and pushes it aside, demonstrating some serious physical strength. That's a pretty thick wall, with a portrait and tv screen on it to boot, but he manages to throw it open fairly easy.

Once past that, we see Mario stumble a bit from the momentum of pushing the wall. He immediately sets himself upright, gesturing again for Luigi to "Come on!" without much of a pause. Again, so much character on display here; Mario is flinging himself right into the action, and while he isn't particularly clumsy, he's practically stumbling from how fast he's pushing himself.

You can read this as that's simply in Mario's heroic nature - to run right into danger without so much as a second thought - but you can also read it as him being ecstatic to be out of that portrait. Even though he knows at this point that King Boo is waiting for them and Princess Peach still needs saving, he's still smiling and urging Luigi to follow him, like they're on an adventure. This is much more his speed, as opposed to being the one needing a rescue.

So Mario opens the door, not bothering to actually wait for Luigi, and continues on ahead. I read it as a bit of his impulsiveness with charging ahead, and also as trust that Luigi will follow him anywhere - albeit at his own pace.

For a split second, Luigi hesitates with a confuse "Mario?". Even though he knows his brother, he probably wasn't expecting Mario to bounce back so quickly. But hey, if his brother is still willing to forge on ahead even though he just escaped a trapped portrait, Luigi can't hold himself back either, can he?

He grabs his flashlight and exclaims a energized "Okay!". Again, keep in mind that this whole game, Luigi has been terrified out of his wits and scared of every obstacle in his way. But now having his brother back has him grinning and ready to face the challenges up ahead. The way they inspire courage in each other can actually be so personal-

Even though Luigi's Mansion 3 came out first, and the two don't really have a lot of connections outside of being based on the same property, I can't help but connect the new movie's "Nothing can hurt us, as long as we're together!" theme to this scene here.

Such a good scene, great animation and personality on display. Literally my only complaint is that I want more of well thought out cutscenes in Super Mario games in general.

Oh, and more bro hugs. Definitely more bro hugs.

#Super Mario bros #super mario #smb #luigi's mansion #Luigi's mansion 3 #mario #luigi #snake talks #this scene means the world to me I would KILL for more cutscenes like this in Mario games #If you guys want more of these or any specific scenes pls send an ask! these are so much fun :3 #asks #also since you didn't specify anon I chose this game I hope thats ok!! #ive been having a rough few days so I needed to gush about Luigis mansion to keep me sane loll

[the-kingshound]

Arthur is kidnapped. Obviously, you are going to find them and slaughter everyone who dared to lay even a finger on them.

Meanwhile, the kidnappers are very weirded out by the King's absolute lack of worry for his current situation.

Arthur enters the cell with calm and a regal presence, as if he was making his entrance in the war room. He lets his gaze inspect the empty interior and the crude, half decaying stone walls.

He turns around to watch one of the kidnappers lock the heavy door.

"You won't be staying here much if you cooperate."

Another guard adds, in a clearly derogatory tone, "enjoy your stay, your Majesty."

"Oh, I'm sure I will."

Enjoying the look of confused contempt on her face, Arthur takes their time to further inspect the cell. It is not appealing by any means. In fact, the humidity eroded the stone on one particularly dark corner and the rest is completely devoid of any furniture. At least the rest of the cell is dry.

Once appeased, Arthur simply sits down on the barren floor. The perplexed annoyance in one of the guard's gaze rises.

"Who do you think you are?"

Arthur smiles. "Your King, my dear."

He notices the uneasiness creeping in the gaze of the tall, burly men who previously seemed to hesitate in capturing him. Tilting his head a bit to the side, he softly asks, "I would suppose you'd rather be anywhere else, mh?"

The man lowers his gaze. "I only did this for the pay..."

Arthur nods, sympathetic. "Understandable."

"I was an honest farmer but I lost my crops to the cold-" the man promptly gets interrupted by the other bandit with an elbow hit to his side.

"Shut up. And you, you better shut up as well."

As the guards stand back at their post, Arthur tries to get comfortable on the floor.

"As you wish."

They won't stay here for long, in any case.

---

"Where is the King?"

You make one of your royal guards translate, but the bandit just spits at your feet. "You won't get anything from me, hound."

You crack open their skull against a stone protruding from the ground. Gore immediately starts soaking the ground.

I'll find my King anyway. You think.

---

Elsewhere, Arthur is absentmindedly picking his nails. He thinks that Excalibur might be growing lonely without him, left somewhere in this ruined fortress, but they'll get reunited soon anyway.

He looks up when he hears a set of steps nearing the cells. The guards perk up as well.

"Finally," one murmurs, a faint trace if uneasiness in their voice.

"Ser," they salute the approaching person.

As they come forward, Arthur can hear the desolated exasperation in one of the guard's voice as they murmur.

"They have been... peacefully uncooperative."

Arthur is happy to note that even as kidnappers they are using their correct pronouns. How gracious.

"Open the cell," the person calls, ignoring the man's words. Arthur rises as the gigantic guard does so.

The woman dressed in long blue robes steps in his cell until she is face to face with him.

"I want information and you will give me what I want, King."

The comment is surely meant to be intimidating but Arthur lightly answers, "we'll see about that."

The woman, moving very quickly, presses a dagger to their throat. Arthur keeps still and as a couple of droplets of blood trickle down their throat they ask, "would you like your death to be painless?"

There is a flash of confused anger on her face.

He explains. "If you do, then refrain from harming me. But this is your choice in the end."

Just then, a guttural wail resounds, far, in the dungeon. Arthur smiles, contented. "Oh, that must be my darling."

The woman doesn't let him go, an error that costs her her life.

When the King's Consort comes, they leave behind them only lifeless bodies. Arthur calls, "not that one," as his darling is about to face the now terrified taller bandit. Although the woman is shielding herself with him, Arthur just needs to move a bit in order to give his spouse an opening to cut her arm off and then open her in half.

Arthur gladly lets themselves be checked over by their fussy dear until they are satisfied with his state. Upon finding the light wound at his throat, they turn around and give the woman's cadaver some other hits for good measure.

"I'm fine, dear," Arthur assures, stepping out of the cell. His gaze falls on the terrified form of the spared bandit.

"I-" He hiccups, and when Arthur calmly takes a step forward opening his arm, the man wraps him in a very tight hug and starts sobbing. "... I just wanted the money to get my farm going another year!"

The King rubs his back soothingly. "I know, it's alright."

When the Royal guards enter the building find their King hugging a crying kidnapper and the Royal Consort brutally reducing a cadaver to pieces, they hardly bat an eye.

#TKH on crack #arthur #MC

[heathened]

tagged by the blessed n beautiful @musicandmasochism thanks babe<3 under a cut bc i kinda went off lol

When was the last time you cried? i am going to be real. it was during the first 20 minutes of troy when i watched it last night lmfao

Do you have kids? unless you count the feral child assassin that is actually my cat, no

Do you use sarcasm a lot? noooooooooooo never

What sports do you play? don't rlly play sports so much as do activities, which are cycling, yoga, taking neighborhood walks (i cannot sing the praises of 'take a little walk for your mental health' enough), and dancing in my kitchen

What’s the first thing you notice about people? prob what they're wearing tbh. and i hope thats what they notice about me<3

What’s your eye color? void brown

Scary movies or happy endings? both?? not together probably lol, but obviously Blog With A Saw Icon loves horror movies. and yet i am also a simp for the people's queen austin powers so i am not immune to it all working out

Any special talents? people irl think i am funny (they don't know my humor is just tumblr posts and lil wayne bars but nonetheless), i think i am particularly good at 2 things: making a sauce and cultivating a vibe lmao

Where were you born? northern california

What are your hobbies? above activities, music (you guys ever heard of this? incredible. ya gotta check it out), uhhhh learning hobbies tbh lol...for the funsies of it all, i've taught myself/learned how to knit, wallpaper, javascript, translate latin, garden, leatherwork, macramé, graphic design, clothing repair, and prob many more niche things in the name of a beloved personal project. oh yeah! i guess i'm a Writer™ or w/e so technically. i like writing more than i don't like it

Do you have pets? a tortoiseshell menace named ahsoka/snips/snippy/sniperella/baby

How tall are you? 5'7"/170cm, tho if i'm not wearing like. Statement Shoes™ with a heel, i am almost always wearing my black boots that add another 2 inches or so. no matter what i usually have a tall vibe hehe

Favorite subject in school? did very well in school and i am litr on my second graduate degree lmao so i'll be honest i love school (it is how i managed to evade an adhd diagnosis until my late 20s like catherine zeta-jones and those lasers)

Dream job? shout out to a mantra of all time: i simply do not dream of labor. BUT it has occurred to me a lot lately that i actually would have been a great production designer because it's basically Vibe Setting as a job and requires 2 things i love: research and continuity

tagging hmmmmmmmm @wutheringdyke @unspuncreature @lovthievs @spouseoftherisingsun n @underthewirez <3333

#learn about me!! and then let me learn about you!!<3 #i should rlly wrangle a tag for these kinda posts. didnt i have one once. hm

[thedragonchilde]

Ship meme spam round one

1- Who is the most affectionate?

Please, Chibodee is the king of casual affection! It doesn't actually occur as easily to Domon, but he gets really into it, so it's all good.

2-Big spoon/Little spoon?

Chibodee is absolutely big spoon... unless he falls asleep first, then all bets are off

3-Most common argument?

Tough call. What's likely for them is brief heated arguments, but, like... the thing they're arguing about isn't the real problem. (So I guess technically these proxy arguments are really about communication, and the ways they both fail at it when upset - and things do improve once a blowout fight brings that into the open.)

4-Favorite non-sexual activity?

I feel like sparring is the obvious answer here

5-Who is most likely to carry the other?

I would pay actual money to see Domon pick up Chibodee. I'm sure he could, of course, but it's just a funny visual.

6-What is their favorite feature of their partner’s?

Assuming this means physical features, it's a tie on Chibodee's behalf - he pays particular attention to people's eyes, and Domon's dark fiery eyes are no exception... but Domon also has the perfect ass. On the flip side, Domon doesn't quite get why he would have to pick just one thing. Does ‘smile’ count as a feature?

7-What’s the first thing that changes when they realize they have feelings for the other?

Knowing he has no chance at that point, Chibodee busts his ass to make sure that nothing changes between them (the last thing he needs is Domon getting wise)... which works out okay until he blurts it out to the other Shuffles. So I suppose the first thing that changes is the rest of the gang (particularly George) having increasing awkward moments where they keep a suspiciously close eye out for any rise in tension between the two.

When Domon finally realizes his feelings down the line, he actually comes out with it fairly quickly - but not before some uncharacteristic fumbling, a not-incorrect accusation that Chibodee is hiding something from him, and a very loaded sparring session.

8-Nicknames? & if so, how did they originate?

Nothing really in the way of affectionate pet names, not that Chibodee didn't try

9-Who worries the most?

I have to give it to broody Domon. If Chibodee does, he usually tries to play it off.

10-Who remembers what the other one always orders at a restaurant?

Chibodee, but mostly because Domon has predictable taste

11-Who tops?

You speak as though that wouldn't be competitive

12-Who initiates kisses?

At first, definitely Chibodee, though he's got to be careful about it, because the whole thing is still shaky territory for Domon and steamrolling him isn't going to help. Eventually, it evens out a little more (and Domon can be surprisingly thoughtful about it)

13-Who reaches for the other’s hand first?

Whoever needs it. Encouragement via hand-holding is one stripe of affection that comes very naturally for them.

14-Who kisses the hardest?

I mean, they both have a lot of pent-up passion

15-Who wakes up first?

Domon. Old habits die hard.

16-Who wants to stay in bed just a little longer?

Chibodee's a fairly early riser himself (when he's not hung over), but lord help you if you get him up before he's good and ready

17-Who says I love you first?

...I'll be honest, I'm still working this one out, especially if the L word isn't dropped in the initial confession

18-Who leaves little notes in the other’s one lunch? (Bonus: what does it usually say?)

I'm honestly not sure I see this happening??

19-Who tells their family/friends about their relationship first?

Once it actually happens? I don't think Domon is capable of not telling people

20-What do their family/friends think of their relationship?

Dr Kasshu is terribly confused. Rain has some complicated thoughts, but is overall happy for Domon, and honestly a little relieved. Allenby idly wonders if that (Domon being into guys) is why she never really stood a chance. Argo cautiously approves. Sai has a lot to process. George laughs and asks Chibodee how he managed that miracle. The gals are pleasantly shocked, and $10 says at least one of them feels the need to give Domon the obligatory protective sister speech. (If this is a timeline where Kyoji and/or Schwarz is around, he/they had a feeling it would go this way.)

21-Who is more likely to start dancing with the other?

I'm not sure I see this happening either

22-Who cooks more/who is better at cooking?

Why do I get the feeling Domon might actually have picked up some skills in the wilderness? Nothing fancy, but.

23-Who comes up with cheesy pick up lines?

Chibodee, no question

24-Who whispers inappropriate things in the other’s ear during inappropriate times?

Chibodee is the easy answer here too, though there's a good chance that anything he says will take a few seconds to click for Domon, if it doesn't sail over his head entirely. If Domon were to do this, however, he'd be more effective, mostly by virtue of sheer bluntness.

25-Who needs more assurance?

Oh lord, in their own ways, both of them! The trouble is that, in their own ways, they both aren't great at seeking it out (Domon gets snippy and withdraws, Chibodee pulls the old "eyyy lmao I am totally OK no need to worry"), so it comes down to the other learning those cues

26-What would be their theme song?

...so I kind of have a playlist? https://open.spotify.com/user/thedragonchilde/playlist/7mT3I57SvEMps9Gz5AJl7O?si=1Je5GtALTpejsoA9ELWBLg

27-Who would sing to their child back to sleep?

Chibodee, no contest. He'd pass on his mom's lullaby.

28-What do they do when they’re away from each other?

Given that we're dealing with a fairly substantially long-distance relationship at first? Business as usual, though training has been known to get rougher when the stress of separation is particularly high

#royal flush

[gayuu-the-necromancer]

William Rex

Chapter 2

 ｡⋆｡˚🦋˚｡⋆｡

William: "Ahahaha! You're the unluckiest person I've ever met. To think that in the end you were forced to say yes to teaming up with a person you're most wary of."

Kate: "Um..it's not like that...."

William: "It's fine, you don't need to deny it. It's not like I'm particularly offended or anything."

Right when Victor proposed the idea of teaming up with Master William, the man himself showed up. There was no way I could have said no.

I ended up accepting to work with Master William.

(....As the 'Fairy tale master' I have to win the trust of these people, so that I can go back to my normal life)

(If keep being vigilant and don't go off on tangents, I'll be fine)

Kate: "So...Master William."

William: "William."

Kate: "....William, what are your plans for today?"

(What if he's going to take me to another blood-soaked arena....)

Opium dens, East ends slums....

I asked all the unsafe places I could think of and all he did was...

Laugh funnily.

William: "Sorry to disappoint you, my lady. But we don't kill people every day and night."

-----Options-----

I don't know what to expect.

Sorry.

Thank god.

--------

(No matter how terrifying last night was....me asking that is still rude)

Kate: "........Sorry, that was rude of me."

William: "No. It's a natural reaction. Besides...."

William: "I quite like that honest look on your face and the fact that you ask so many questions."

William: "To tell you the truth, I don't have any plans for today."

William: "I guess, maybe, going to town for a bit to gather info..."

At that moment, a bright voice flew in close by.

Liam: "Good morning Will! Oh, you too, Kate."

(Oh, that voice is...)

Kate: "Good morning, Li......um?"

Kate: "Mr. Roger....I didn't know you were good at mimicking other people.....?"

Roger: ".....It's not me. Liam, stop pranking everyone with your ability, will you?"

Liam: "Ahaha, sowwy~"

Kate: "HUH!?!?"

With a light giggle, Liam popped out of thin air.

Liam: "Haha, that's a fresh reaction. Did I surprise you that much?"

Kate: "Aha....so 'disappearing' is your special ability?"

Liam: "Yep. I guess the correct way of saying it is to 'become invisible' to the eyes of people at a certain distance. Fufu, is quite convenient, is it not?"

William: "You look happy. Are you having fun experimenting with Roger, again?"

Liam: "As expected of you, Will. You know everything."

Kate: "Experimenting?"

William: "Roger, himself is a cursed 'traitorous hunter', and is researching about the curse."

Liam: "He's an oddball who joined the Crown because he wanted samples other than himself."

Roger: "I do human experiments all the time. Liam here is my cooperative test subject."

(Human experiments.....)

Roger: "That's right. I'm also planning to do some comparative testing with the general public."

Roger: ".....Young lady, do you want to cooperate?"

 ｡⋆｡˚🦋˚｡⋆｡

Roger: ".....Young lady, do you want to cooperate?"

Kate: "Eh...?"

(I don't know what he will make me do. I'm scared)

I swallowed my fear that welled up.

Kate: "If that's within the scope of my duties as a Fairy tale master then.....""

William: "......."

Roger: "....Heh Hahaha. Didn't think you'd actually take it seriously. My bad, I was joking."

Kate: "Eh....O-Oh....?"

(Well.....thank god, I guess)

Liam: ".....Will? What's wrong?"

William: ".....No, nothing."

.............

We parted ways with Roger who went straight to his lab, and Liam joined William on a walk to our unknown destination.

(Hm...? What is that?)

As we approached the entrance hall, I noticed what was not there last night piled high in a voracious pile in the center of the hall.

A frame wrapped in fine cloth, a coffin with a design of obvious historical value.

Necklaces with gemstones larger than a fist displaced on a torso mannequin....

Other beautiful things are lined up in a narrow space.

Alphonse: "Haa...El did it again."

Liam: "Good morning, Al. Did you just come home?"

Alphonse: "Yes. My friends....wouldn't let me go last night."

As Mr. Alphonse approached our direction, he had a languid atmosphere and I smelled the muddled sweet scents of multiple perfumes.

(It would be wise not to ask....what he had been doing until morning)

Alphonse: "Let's have these taken to El's room."

Alphonse: ".....At the end of the day, it's probably destined to be thrown away again in the room like a piece of junk."

Alphonse: "Anyways, goodnight everybody."

Mr. Alphonse, with a theatrical lament, left for the back of the castle.

Liam: "Master El is cursed with the curse of the Queen of Greed."

Liam: "He is looking for the 'most beautiful thing' in the world....that's why sometimes he can be like this."

Kate: "So all of that was Master Elbert's belongings?"

Liam: "Yep. I heard that the Queen from Snow White is based on this curse. Also, not to forget, Al's curse is of the 'Magic Mirror."

Jude: "Tsk...What the hell is this? I can't walk."

 ｡⋆｡˚🦋˚｡⋆｡

Jude: "Tsk...What the hell is this? I can't walk."

Mr. Jude appears with a swear word and stomps over the coffin with his foot.

(It's like he's punishing...)

Ellis: "Good morning, William, Kate, and Liam. We're off to work. See you later."

Behind him, Ellis jumped over the coffin, like it was nothing.

Liam: "Have a nice day~ .....Their curses are 'the 13th Wizard' and the Thorn."

Liam: "Do you know about the Sleeping Beauty fairy tale?"

Suddenly, Ellis, who was about to leave the castle, looked back at us as if he had just remembered something.

Ellis: "I see that the newspapers have already reported about last night's incident, Will. They say the Queen of Hearts is out."

William: "It's earlier than expected. Seems that there is an excellent reporter. Thank you, Ellis."

(Queen of Hearts...?)

I nod my head as I watch his back as he leaves the castle.

Liam: "It's from Alice in Wonderland, published decades ago. 'The Queen of Hearts."

Liam: "Off with his head!' is what she always says, right?"

Liam: "That's why the newspapers write funny things like Will's tricks."

Kate: "I see...."

Liam: "Roger says that the Queen of Hearts itself may be based on the curse of the 'Self-righteous King."

Liam: "I don't really know if that's true."

I wrote down every piece of knowledge I received one by one in my notebook so as to not forget.

Kate: "Saying that 'the Queen of Hearts is out' means that William's assassination is famous?"

Liam: "Of course. Will is one of the founders of the Crown."

Liam: "It's is said that the Crown was created as a result of an incident that Will caused, right?"

William: "Yeah. You remember it so well. My cat is listening to me."

(....I see)

So, it was before the Queen gave the order.

William may have 'conquered evil with evil' in some cases.

(...And that there was a reason for her Majesty to think it should be continued)

(The Crown...William, what are they all fighting for?)

William: "Speaking of which, Liam, how was your stage practice today?"

Liam: "The show is this afternoon! But the action scene is pretty hard."

(Stage...show....)

Instinctively, I reacted to those words.

In the end, I ended up not receiving my paycheck for the month, so my dream of getting a ticket with my night shift paycheck was no more.

On the contrary, I won't be able to say anything about the theater for the next month.

(....I wish I could see it)

William: "......."

William: ".....I've decided my plans for today."

Kate: "Eh!?"

William: "Let's go see the play."

 ｡⋆｡˚🦋˚｡⋆｡

(My job should be to observe William and note his sins, not to enjoy watching the play with him)

William: "Rain rain go away, come again anot her day....♪"

(The person singing in a good mood next to me is the one who should be monitoring me)

(Not a gentleman who will go out of his way to please me...but)

Kate: "Um...Since this is a popular show, we might not get tickets if we unexpectedly go on the day of the show!"

William: "Don't worry. I got it."

Liam had me dressed up with gusto, and I was standing in front of the theater, escorted by William.

William: "Where do you wanna sit?"

When asked, I reflexively think of the area in the front row where I can have a good view of the stage.

(I like watching it there the best. I will be able to see the expressions on the actors' faces when they come out on stage....)

(...But it's too extravagant to order so much)

Kate: "As long as I could see it, I would be happy with any seat."

William: "Hmmm?"

After climbing the stairs and walking to the reception area, William said his name and for some reason, the manager jumps right out.

Manager: "Master William, how may I help you?"

William: "I need two seats for tonight's show."

Manager: "Sure."

(Huh....?)

William: "As one of the supporters of this theater, I have some flexibility."

The manager and William proceeded to talk familiarly, despite my lack of understanding.

Manager: "Is it your usual seat?"

William: "No. Are there any seats in the front row?"

Kate: "Eh....!?"

When I started trembling with joy but also holding back from jumping with excitement, William's eyes softened gently as if he could see through me.

William: "Heh, if you are this happy, you should have told me you wanted to sit in the front from the very beginning."

Manager: "Thank you for your patience. We have your seats ready."

(Ready....? That means I can finally see it)

William: "Thank god. Let's go then."

(It was something that I'd had to work hard for months and also I have to be so lucky to get it so easily....)

(Life is so unfair.....)

(....But, I'm still happy)

..........

Entering the theater, my buoyant mood was immediately blown away.

(It's not a level that stands out)

Even in the front world, William seems to be a celebrity, from the aristocrats in the royal box seats to the commoners on the second floor.

On top of that, all their gazes seem painful, like knifes being thrashed on my back.

(Is it because it's unusual for him to be seating in the front row....or is it because he has a lady with him?)

I was terribly nervous because I had never been exposed to such stares, but more than that....

(Isn't it kind of bothering?)

I glanced to the side and my gaze tangled with William's streaming eyes.

William: "Don't worry, I'm used to it."

Kate: "....Oh, I see."

(I'm slowly getting used to his mind reading)

William: "By the way, I also know what happens when I look back at the person who stares at me."

Kate: ".....What happens?"

William: "50% - will look away, 40% - will smile at me."

Kate: "....And the remaining 10%?"

William: "Raises their middle finger and say 'I hate you.' Mostly men of course."

Kate: "Fufu, what's with that?"

I couldn't help but feel the weight of my shoulders being reduced.

(.....Seriously, what a strange man)

It's obvious, but I, or anyone else besides the Crown, have been involved with him and have liked or disliked him.

Realizing that....I felt for the first time that he was the same person living in the same world.

William: "You are finally smiling."

Kate: ".....Was I not smiling that much?"

William: "Yeah, and even now, you're laughing to your heart's content only half of the time."

Kate: "Eh...."

William: "Oh look, the curtain is about to open....the show is gonna start."

I was tilting my head at the meaning of his words, but the stage, which began immediately, took my attention away.

By the time it was over, I had forgotten all about it.

 ｡⋆｡˚🦋˚｡⋆｡

Kate: "I thought he was really stabbed with a knife in that scene! How could he act like that?"

On the way home after the play, my excitement of seeing the play so close up was too hard to shake off.

William: "Have you never really been stabbed before?"

Kate: "Eh....that's unexpected. Isn't it obvious?"

William: "Why not? Nowadays, anesthesia and suturing techniques are more advanced and he could have been stabbed by someone he knew for acting."

William: "And he had a habit of dragging his left leg a little."

William: "It's common for nerves to be compressed by an open wound during suture surgery, leaving the lower extremities paralyzed."

Kate: "Oh....really?"

William: '....What do you think?"

(If it's true....that's a hell of a passion)

I can't see myself giving my life at the risk of possibly dying.

(Is that what love does to you?)

Thinking with a straight face, William burst out laughing.

William: "AHAHAHA! What's with that face?"

Kate: "Eh.....?"

William: "It's just my speculation, Kate."

William: "You trust my words too much, even though you think you should be wary of me."

I suddenly got embarrassed when I realized that I took his words too seriously.

Kate: "Seriously...please don't make fun of me."

I reflexively retorted and covered his mouth with my hand.

(I shouldn't...from earlier)

(I was excited by the play and emotionally moved)

William: "....Kate."

But, William gently removed my hand that was covering his mouth.

William: "You have a habit of taking people's feelings into consideration, but you try to push your own feelings into the background."

William: "It doesn't seem like it's because I was the main killer."

William: " 'I'm afraid of working with you', 'I don't want to be a part of your human experiments', 'I want to go see the play', 'I want to sit in the front row."

William: " 'I don't want to be teased'....."

William: "They are all genuine feelings. Why hide them?"

(Why....?)

The question was asked so curiously that a strange feeling welled up in my heart.

(I don't know...why)

(But...I just)

(I felt like I shouldn't....voice my heart as it is)

Kate: "I don't have any...particular reason as to why."

William: "You could have cursed me. Like calling me a murderer or selfish."

Kate: "It's just...I don't know you so well enough to curse you, and...."

William: "That's absolutely right."

William: "If so....would you like to know more?"

I was perplexed by that question.

(Why are you asking me that?)

(I know that I need to understand his sin...to be able to return to my normal life)

(It shouldn't matter to me....whether I intend to know or not)

Kate: "....it's for my goal."

William: "Mmhmm."

William simply smiled and looked at me.

(Why is smiling so much when looking at me?)

Ever since I met him, I'm at the mercy of his smile.

(....Even right now, he's not looking at me)

(He's trying to see what's in my heart....and it makes me restless)

Kate: ".....Thank you for bringing me to the show today."

William: "You're welcome. I was originally planning to come to town anyways, so don't worry about it."

William: "So, where shall we go next?"

Kate: "Hm? Aren't we going home....?"

William: "Haha, Why? Is it your bedtime, already?"

William: "Don't worry, for the next month, your life will be far from modest."

William: "Oh, I know a place. It's safe and fun. You'll love it."

Big Ben is showing at 9pm. Just watching the play is enough, I'm full.

Besides, it doesn't feel right to go to a 'fun place' alone....that too with an assassin on a night like this.

(But....)

But, today he was there for me. He saw what I wanted and gave it to me.

Was it a trap to get me to nod to this invitation, or was it his true kindness?

Once that was clear, I felt I could understand just a little bit more about who he was.

William: "Come, let's go."

There is only one way to know.

Chapter 3

#ikemen series #ikemen villain #ikemen villains #ikemen villains william #otome #cybird #cybird ikemen #cybird otome #ikemen mc

[cleolinda]

Weekend links

My posts

Mostly resting, to be honest; had a bad pain week and then I got a flu shot (and timed it so I could spend Saturday sleeping it off).

However, there were Grammy nominations on Friday, and I am very pleased that The Age of Pleasure is up for Best Album (and Best Progressive R&B Album, it looks like). I wrote (briefly) about my favorite Janelle Monáe songs back when the album came out this summer, if you'd like to listen to those:

"Cold War"

"Make the Bus"

"Violet Stars Happy Hunting!!!"

"We Were Rock and Roll"

"Don't Judge Me"

"Know Better"

--

Oh, wait, I did post something this week--a poll about which song you most associate with the Go-Go's. (The second highest result, "I have never heard one single Go," is what I wanted to measure: if you're within the reach of something I might write, what can I assume that you know?) Looks like the poll ends on Monday, so there's still time to weigh in on that.

Reblogs of interest

There was a Traditional Tumblr Scare earlier this week; you can find that under #the happenings, my "oh holy fuck why is social media crumbling into the sea again" tag, but here is the main explanation of the leaked memo. Short version: official word went out that they might actually get rid of Tumblr Live, and all the ewoks celebrated.

I have been around long enough to see multiple Tumblr Is Fucked scares, yes, but also, this was not the year to play with my nerves. Obviously I'm staying here, and I was already paying for ad-free, but I'll be dusting my Dreamwidth off as a mirror for the big posts. And I've already been using Patreon as a "get it here early" hub/archive for a month or so now. I am just not getting caught off guard again like I was when dipshit took over Twitter last November.

Pillowfort, meanwhile, actually is in financial trouble.

--

I haven't heard any details yet, but: SAG-AFTRA reaches tentative agreement with Hollywood studios in a move to end nearly 4-month strike.

Finalists of the 2023 Comedy Wildlife Photography Awards

Fuck It, Internet Guide

I was there, Gandalf: Don't overpluck your brows.

Goth Anime Legs Uncle finally cycled back around to me with the addition that he's actually BROM? BROM??

damn girl are you the tower of babel

Video

This is just what ADHD sounds like

"My cat decided to use magic damage"

"A mating dance (?)"

Snow leopards: Sproing!

The sacred texts

i’ll kick anyone’s ass. i’ll kick your ass. i’ll kick your dog’s ass. i’ll kick my own ass

Personal tag of the week

#art was good this week, with a Mothman piece I particularly liked

#weekend links #odds and ends #linkspam

[exocynraku]

thunder spoilers under the cut!!! read at your own risk!!! here are my opinions on the book!!! i wrote this right after reading originally on the 4th and planned 2 post it on the 7th. it's not the 7th exactly where i live but the wiki updated with spoilers since it's the 7th over there so whatever

okay, so, overall, i liked it. i didnt LOVE it, but i liked it. sunbeams chapters were all great, and with nightheart travelling with frostpaw, he finally had the chance to not be an ass, and he wasn't as bad! i actually read his chapters this time, and oh my god frostpaws chapters were INCREDIBLE!!!! i loved her interactions with whistlepaw and smoky, and wow. she did get spayed, LOL! got spoiled for that early (thanks, assholes!) i was NOT expecting to meet the new cats of the park! i totally thought we'd encounter warriorclan! i'm a little bummed about that, but the cats of the park were all super nice to read about which was super nice. especially bee! thought i'm upset she has the same name as another cat.. wails the reveal of splashtail i totally expected, but i'm a little surprised over curlfeather. i know that there's been suspect she was a villain, but damn! i wanted to hold onto hope! but hey, her being evil is super interesting. plus, wow! she's in the dark forest! i guess i shouldve expected that, but it's felt like forever since a cat got sent there. (which i dont think is rlly true? juniperclaw went i think that was tbc? whatever, still feels so long ago) also i didnt mind that it was a travelling book! i know a lot of ppl HATEEEE travelling books, but i think there was still enough substance to make it interesting! now, that ending... er, hard to explain my feelings. i like cliffhangers because they make me really excited for the next book, but man! this one hurt bad! i want frostpaw to jump out !!!! raugh!!! also, waffle and wasp are cute! i'm happy theyre coming to the clans! we NEED more genetic diversity SOBS and honestly, with frostpaws thoughts right before leaving the park, with the clans needing to become less harsh and fighty, and more open, especially to outsiders? that was incredible! genuinely, genuinely incredible! and i hope they go through with it, i really do! berryheart is also an interesting character. if i'm being honest, i hope she leaves. not becaues i dont like her (i think she's one of the most interesting characters we've had in the series for a long time, even if she sucks), but because like i said earlier we NEED more genetic diversity in the clans! more cats with long blood lines need to leave or die, and new cats w/o long blood lines, or none at all need to start existing. all of the incest is pissing me off. so i'm glad that somecat with not a particularly long bloodline, but a big one (berryheart has like 70 siblings) is leaving. plus those other cats. last misc things, finally, some tree action! it's a miracle! i also like how there were mentions of 1: thunderclan being overcrowded (please please please mass exctinction event GO) and 2: tree being mediator, but never really having the chance to shine. also, cherryfall sucks. jeez louise! i used to like her for gods sake! spotfur and her kits were adorable, i liked ivypool in this book, and oh my god, brambleclaw finally gets less of a spotlight! overall, i liked it. not the most amazing book to ever exist ever, but it definitely got my excited for the next books!!! really happy with ASC so far and i'm pumped to see what's going to happen with it in the future.

also, with the cats of the park cats being introduced, i'll have to draw them! oh boy more work for me to do

#wc #warrior cats spoilers #wc spoilers #asc spoilers #a starless clan spoilers #thunder spoilers #ray talk

[spoonyglitteraunt]

Sooooo.

I just checked something on mobile, and that means having to deal with the ads which, sure ok I guess. Usually I either ignore them, or grumble to myself if they are particularly teeth grindy like the diet ads. Because really, Tumblr? Can we just not? Can we just yeet these and their fatphobic bullshit into the nearest trashfire? Just sell me gadgets and gizmos aplenty or something.

So normally I would have zero inclination to share one of these. The less seen of them the better. But I'll make an exception this once. Because, well.

Tumblr, I have questions.

I just...

Ignoring the bullshittery of the topic with the barely legible 'meal plans" that I'm sure are to die for. (As in they'd kill you if you actually followed them for real.) What in the seven fandom hells even IS this. 😂

Just look at that thing and let it sink in for a second.

So you start with the 45 to 55s.

Weird place to start, but ok. You get dude who looks like he ran away from a conan the barbarian game with a woman where the only thing they did to make her look "older" was to give her sort of vaguely grey hair. Has the designer ever seen a woman in their 40's early 50's? Or seen any humans in that age range? Any humans at all even? That bicep is bigger than her whole head. Also why are they naked? And why are they the only ones that look computergame rendered compared to the more "photorealistic" ones next to them?

Not to mention none of these "people" look particularly happy or excited about this challenge they are trying to sell you. What is the message here? Take our challenge and be so miserable you need naked hugging times in space to recover? I mean, that's more honest than most diet ads then.

So we move onto the 25 to 33 bracket.

Weird age to cut it off at, but sure. I guess this age group can expect to suddenly feel the urge to have "supportive Bro time" as part of their need to recover from the hells of depriving the body of natural energy sources. But look at that manly support. Look at the nuzzling, I mean the smelling of eachother's manly musk, I mean the bros will be bros solidarity with definitely no subtext as displayed on the subtext site.

On to the 33 to 44 aged.

I guess if you are 33 you can pick your fighters meal plans. But not if you're 44 or 45 then you only get ONE! This one is the most ambiguous and thus boring. Is it a particularly muscly lady, a msclady if you will, or just a well hidden second dude? Or could they actually have tried to appeal to beyond the gender binary, quickly confused themselves, and then just went meh throw in some muscles hide the head and it will probably be fine. We'll never know. So let's put this down as ambiguous snuggles and hope that dude goes to see a doctor for whatever AI art went wrong with that arm.

Now all of that was vaguely nonsensical and stupid, but nothing that would compel me to share. No that's for our next contestants age groups.

So, my 55+ dudes. No ladies mind, the only feminine presenting people allowed in this challenge need to be between 45 to 55, maybe 33+. The rest of you ladies get to escape the challenge and find your own reasons to do some sad naked cuddling.

But my 55+ dudes, you get the chance, nay the unexplainably privilege of tenderly embracing a lion.

Was the lion rewarded to him by the challenge as a comfort animal? Was he already in a committed partnership with the lion? Was the lion just nearby and got caught up in a moment of emotion? And what has any of this to do with diets? Who knows? Certainly not me that's for sure. But our totally real and not badly AI photoshopped apex predator is clearly making the most of snuggling up to the muscly 55+ dude who incidentally looks younger than the two previous categories. Conclusion: cuddling lions in your time of need may in fact be the source of anti aging. Let's all not try this at home.

And then we arrive at the whippersnappers amongst the lineup of tender manly dudes.

You get to gently kiss a panther on the head. As one does with an apex predator, obviously. Funny though how there are more feline paramours than any other category what with the ambiguous third. So furry is clearly the ultimate relationship dynamic for sad naked cuddling in the aftermath of their product. Maybe they should have given them all cats then. Although I must say the panther seems far less pleased to be used for comfort than the lion did. Maybe they didn't feel photogenic that day. Maybe it's a relationship on the rocks. Maybe they were not paid enough to deal with this shit. Neither were we, my friend. Neither were we.

So, as I said. Tumblr, I got questions.

But I don't suspect you have any answers.

#sometimes you just have to ask why #even if you know you won't get an answer #tumblr ads #but seriously fuck diet ads #find better ads Tumblr

[ichinisankaku]

Event Translation - Spotlight ~Tsukushi High Side~ (Part 2)

Azami: …

Kumon: AZAMIIII!

Azami: !?

You surprised me… why'd you come up all of a sudden.

Kumon: No particular reason… I just happened to see you!

Azami: You're too impulsive.

Kumon: What were you doing?

Azami: …Here. High school questionnaire.

Kumon: Right… you're in your last year of middle school, aren't you! You're so mature, I guess I forgot~

Azami: Well, my mental age is probably older than yours, at least.

Kumon: Hey, what's that supposed to mean!

Azami: Means what I said.

Kumon: Ggnnh~…!

…So? You decided where you're going?

Azami: Seems like Shift already has, but… there's not anywhere I'm particularly hoping to go.

My old man and homeroom teacher are both urging me to think about it properly soon.

So for now I'm just thinking of whatever schools are fit for my current academic ability.

Kumon: Ooh! You should come to Tsuku High, then! I'd be really happy if you did!

Azami: Just cause you'd be happy?

Kumon: Isn't that reason enough!

I wanted to try for O-High at first, cause I wanted to be with Nii-chan!

Azami: …Did you pass?

Kumon: No. I had a fever day of the entrance exam and couldn't take it.

But I'm going full power at Tsuku High and enjoying my time there!

I've made lotsa friends, the classes are fun, and the canteen's menu is delicious, so I'm glad Tsuku High's where I ended up!

Azami: Hmm…

Kumon: I'll make a presentation all about it for you, Azami!

Azami: You don't need to go that far.

Azami: …

Izumi: It suits you, Azami.

Banri: Works pretty well.

Omi: Yeah, it's perfect. Really cool.

Juza: Feels different to Kumon.

Taichi: So cooool! A gakuran would be great too, but a blazer really fits~

Azami: Doesn't matter if it suits me or not.

Sakyo: Bon's entering high school…

Banri: Don't look so serious, old man.

Sakyo: Huh? Who are you calling old?

*door opens*

Kumon: Ah! Azami, you're in uniform!

Ooh~! It suits you really nicely, huh!

Azami: That's all I've been hearing.

Kumon: I'm super pumped to be going to the same school as you! Let's keep getting along, Azami!

Azami: …Yeah.

Kumon: I think I've still got pictures from your entrance ceremony on my phone… hang on, I think it's this folder…

Azami: You don't need to get those out.

Kumon: Hehe. But I really was glad you came here!

And I really enjoy being able to have lunch on the rooftop with you like this, too!

I didn't think you'd really come, so on the inside I was kinda surprised.

Azami: …I mean, anywhere I could go would've been fine.

Or like, it's not JUST because you made a whole hand-written presentation about it.

Kumon: Ahaha! It's fine either way. It was worth spending all night compiling Tsuku High's good points!

Azami: Where are you putting your efforts…

Kumon: How about it? Are you enjoying it here?

Azami: …It's alright.

Kumon: What's with that response!? You really aren't honest, are you~

[Prologue | Flora 1 | Flora 2 | Flora 3 | Flora 4 | Flora 5 | Flora Epilogue | Tsukushi 1 | Tsukushi 3 | Tsukushi 4 | Tsukushi 5 | Tsukushi Epilogue]

#a3! #a3! translation #act! addict! actors! #kumon hyodo #azami izumida

[bluebudgie]

Behold! The long announced whiny pissbaby gamer rage essay that noone on the internet asked for.

Disclaimer up front: This is about Eff Eff Sixteen. If you're a fan of this game I advise you to just ignore this because I genuinely don't want to piss into your morning coffee with my negativity. I will rip this game several new assholes. You have been warned.

FAQ Q: Don't you have anything better to spend your time on than writing a ridiculously lengthy internet text post about a video game whose existence you are free to simply ignore? A: Yes, but this matter is personal. I'm writing this for the sake of carthasis. Closure. To be free of the rage that has possessed me for the past months. Q: Have you tried touching grass? A: I have sat in a field of grass for a prolonged amount of time prior to writing this. I am beyond the need of touching grass. Q: Do you expect anyone to actually read all this? A: No.

Spoilers ahead, obviously. Let's go.

------

Table of Contents

Introduction: Is this the worst game ever made? 1.1 It's personal 1.2 Pre-release & producer statements

The battle system

The narrative 3.1 Storytelling and morality 3.2 Pacing 3.3 Visuals 3.4 Characters 3.4.1 The game's biggest mistake 3.4.2 The state of women 3.5 Music

Credit where credit is due 4.1 It's personal again

Conclusion

------

1. Introduction: Is this the worst game ever made? What a strange way to start, you may think. Shouldn't this question rather be addressed in a conclusion at the end? I want to set the record straight from the start: No, it is not the worst game ever made. All things considered I don't even think it's the worst game of its series. And yet I have never in my life felt such unbridled hatred for a video game, or honestly, any piece of entertainment media I can currently think of. Why is that?

1.1 It's personal Usually I'm pretty good at doing the sensible thing people should do when they don't like something - ignore it. Why bother wasting your energy deliberately seeking out something that you know will make you angry?

Hear me out for a moment, I'll have to go on a tangent here.

I didn't actively get into the series until a year before FFXIII released - which at this point in time is 15 years ago now, but considering we've had only two more (singleplayer) mainline games since then, it's still a relatively late entry point. This is to say: I don't think I'm wearing the worst nostalgia goggles, but I do have a long history with the series nonetheless. These games have played a big role in my life for those past 15 years.

I used to roll my eyes at the "the series died after FFX" crowd. FFXII is one of the best in the series, sure FFXIII was a landslide miss for me, but... that's one game, right. Then FFXV's release drew closer. I did not like what I saw, for many reasons I won't detail now. What did I do? I blacklisted the game's name on all social media platforms, and didn't hear anything about it anymore. To this day I haven't actually seen much of it, though I do know the rough outline. And I know that while the game has a dedicated fanbase, it has also received its fair share of harsh criticism.

Why am I telling you all this?

1.2 Pre-release & producer statements

A few years ago, FFXVI was announced. And I have to be honest: I was negatively biased from the start. I hadn't been happy with SE's general direction for years and I wasn't particularly hopeful for this entry either. But - and I want to make this very clear - I was open to give this game a fair chance. The announcement trailer didn't really hook me but it looked alright, some visual and audio gripes aside. I was... cautiously curious. Not quite enough to call it optimistic, but I wanted to be hopeful.

You know what's excellent at crushing hopes? Game producer interviews that range from "that's a severely stupid opinion to have but you do you" aka (paraphrased) "our traditionally turn-based series can't be turn-based anymore because in order to get the production costs covered we have to appeal to the masses, and the masses are kids who love action and not outdated combat systems in which you have to navigate menus to act" (source); to downright offensive statements such as "we are creating a fantasy world based on reality and therefore black people can't exist in our european medieval setting" (source); and "I have gamer pride so I don't want to feature an easy difficulty setting in my game" (source - for clarity's sake there are accessibility options in the game in the form of equipment that helps simplify combat, however the statement itself is still really goddamn stupid).

And I know these statements have been called out by some - but it definitely didn't blow up as much as it should have considering the popularity of this franchise. It's an open secret why this is the case (if you're out of the loop: the game producer in question is an untouchable god with a really large cult fan following), and quite frankly I believe this is probably where the first seeds of my hatred were sown. Knowing that no matter what FFXVI was going to be it would have people defend it out of their blind commitment to the team behind the game's development, left a.... spiteful aftertaste in my mouth.

Ironically looking back now, and plain offensive statements aside, my biggest concern for the game itself was actually the combat system. I'm definitely part of the old-school "a main series FF game needs turn-based combat" crowd. Oh sweet summer child.

At this point I decided it would be better to go the FFXV route (which, by the way, had some similarly stupid dev comments at its release). All marketing made it clear that I was not the target audience for this game, so best to just ignore its existence.

That worked... alright...ish... until the demo's release. I guess you could say curiousity killed the cat. I decided to take a look at someone's playthrough... and that's where my initial "pissbaby gamer rage" draft that I ended up not posting came from. Go big or go home, if I wanted to be angry about this game in public I should at least be fair and wait for the full release. Not judge the game by its (admittedly generous in length) demo. Get the full receipts, see it for all that it is in its entirety. I think in a way I still didn't want to give up hope completely.

And that's where we are now, two months later I've watched a full playthrough of the game including all sidequests. It's been a wild ride to say the least.

2. The battle system

Let's get this out of the way before we finally get to the really meaty part: As mentioned earlier my primary concern before release was the combat system since it's so far removed from the older entries of the series. Ironically, of all things, this is probably the smallest issue I have with the game now.

I still don't think the combat is good, mind you - this is mostly a matter of personal taste but I'll never see how button mashing and a series of QTEs overlayed over 20 minutes of cinematic cutscene is supposed to be more impactful or fun than the oh-so-outdated turn based menu inputs. Then again, I didn't play the game myself and can therefore obviously not judge how good or bad it feels in the heat of battle. I say "button mashing", by the way, as what I've gathered from other people's reviews - who genuinely enjoyed the game - the combat is really watered down and repetitive in comparison to games with similar systems like the DMC series. While you do pick up new abilities over the course of the game it seems like once you've found one combination that works you can solve every single battle following those exact inputs. This is one of the two really big complaints about this game I've seen consistently in almost every review.

Speaking of combat, the game has the weirdest way to pull you out of the action and emotional moments by freezing mid cutscene, showing a "you won the battle - here's your loot" screen while blasting an epic choir rendition of the classic FF fanfare, before picking that same cutscene right back up. I don't know who thought this was a good idea, but it's honestly jarring. For an extremely cinematic game that supposedly wants to break with "outdated" traditions, implementing that very video game-y results screen is a strange choice.

You could say this last point is nitpicking, and if this game had no other issues I would probably not mention it at all, but as it is this little detail is indicative of a much, much larger issue.

3. The narrative

[The sound of cracking knuckles can be heard in the distance.] Let the slaughter begin.

Prior to release the game was marketed as a departure from the rest of the series - the setting was advertised as a darker, more mature, political intrigue for an adult audience. ('But the masses of kids that like action com-' Who? What are you talking about?) Because as we all know, no other FF game has ever been dark before (/sarcasm).

What we got was storytelling and character writing with about the maturity level of a twelve year old teenage boy in his edgelord phase making his first Game of Thrones fanfiction drafts. This game oozes of sexism, really stupid slavery allegories, the most dumbed down black and white morality with a matching set of one-dimensional black and white characters, godawful pacing and some of the worst NPC dialogues I've ever had to witness.

But I'm getting ahead of myself.

3.1 Storytelling and morality

So this dark and mature political story... I'm still searching for it. I know GoT started this trend where writers will use "politics" as a buzz word to make their games look complex (FFXVI hasn't been the sole offender in the past years). Then they expose you to a few kingdom names, show you a map with territories, drop a few year dates with barely any significant relevance to anything over the course of the game, and pretend that's a deep political intrigue. I have news for you: It's not.

Alright, then... this dark and mature... oh. Oh you mean that's because there's a plethora of blood splatters and people say "fuck" and "cock" and "whore" and there's goofily censored sex on screen? Ah... oh. Alright, I see. If that's what you'd call that... sure.

But surely the people who are tattooed like cattle and used as slaves due to being born as magic users will have an interesting role in the story dealing with the very delicate topic of slaver- ...oh, uh... what do you mean the perfect king beloved by everyone is the good guy because unlike all the other people who held slaves, he treated his slaves nicely? And, before you ask.... No, this isn't some sort of commentary the game wants you to question. This guy is unironically, unambiguously portrayed as the perfect good guy. Brought up many, many times for how flawless he is.

And that... is where we're diving into one of this game's biggest and most glaring issues. The writing is so mindnumbingly black and white with not the slightest room for ambiguous or grey morality it's painful. Everything and everyone in this game is always either good with no failings - or so stupidly evil they may as well be a bad saturday morning cartoon villain.

Good characters are always good, and always act out of the pure kindness of their heart. When you think a good character fucked up and actually did something bad, it will later be revealed that either it wasn't them at all and it was all a scheme, or they were possessed by the big baddie and therefore not actually responsible for their actions. Can't possibly risk anyone appearing like a realistic person with character depth now, can we?

And don't worry, just in case you have an extremely bad case of media illiteracy with the slightest hint of doubt of anyone's alignment on the binary moral chart, the game will make sure to overexplain literally every tiny detail to you in the worst way possible. You see, the evil woman right at the start? The one who looks really evil and moves really evil and the first thing she does is being mean to the slaves and being dismissive of her own son? In case you didn't get yet that she's evil, there will be guards whispering about how evil she is when she leaves the scene. Also a scene later the good perfect king will point out how evil she is. And worry not, in case you forget in the few hours she's not on screen, characters will make sure to remind you how she has not a single redeeming quality and every breath she has ever taken has been filled with evil.

And this might sound like I'm exaggerating. But the game is like this with Every. Single. Thing. Sometimes I found myself genuinely wondering if the writers were actively trying to insult the player's intelligence with this condescending amount of overexplanation. Characters constantly comment on everything that is visibly happening on screen - for God's sake if you want to make a modern game that moves away from "outdated" mechanics then write it this way. If you show what is going on with detailed realistic graphics, you do not need characters monologuing a description of what they're seeing. You do not need to voice a character saying "I'm sad" when you can clearly see their facial expression. You do not need to make a character loudly ask himself with noone else present by his side "Is he hallucinating?" when showing another character's hallucinations. Old games did that because they had limited visual capabilities. If you sit on your high horse talking about moving the series forward while spitting into your old playerbase's faces, then do it right at the very least.

Once in a while you'll be exposed to some textbook philosophy theories, which in essence wouldn't be a bad idea at all if those philosophies were somehow smartly woven into the game's narrative… but instead you get characters quoting essentially the wikipedia summary of what that philosophy is about and call it a day.

I wish this was the only issue with the game's writing.

3.2 Pacing

This game's pacing is atrocious. Genuinely, utterly awful. And there`s mostly one thing to blame: Sidequests. If you've heard a single criticism for this game even from people who highly praise it, it's this.

The sidequests are absolutely horrendous filler content on so many levels. Gameplay wise they're usually "follow 10 meters of a linear corridor to defeat an enemy and then grab a carrot at the end" fetch quests. Visually they are not just a nose dive but an entire plane crash compared to the well animated main quests, consisting mostly of the same three reused conversation animations from FFXIV (I'm all for reusing assets if it helps developers save time, work smarter not harder, but this one is blatantly obvious in all the worst ways). And the writing.... oh boy.

NPCs go on and on and on and on having the most blandly written expository dialogue. I get that the writer's intention was to give the world a bit of context and make it feel more alive with random people telling you about their life stories and everyday hurdles, but they failed miserably at making this remotely engaging. They may as well have had people read the dictionary. And maybe this would have worked better as purely written textbox dialogue (if about half of the dialogue was cut, which would still leave more than enough padding around the actually relevant information) - but in a game with voice acting, making people audibly speak in ways noone would ever speak to another person, just doesn't work. It's stilted and unnatural, and really awkward to listen to.

Delivery aside, the stories told in these sidequests vary from "farmer's everyday life issues about growing their crops" to "random child ends oppression by convincing an angry mob of adults they shouldn't be stoning someone because that someone has been a valuable asset to their society (by reminding them they need to keep the streets clean) and suddenly every adult in range is free of bigoted feelings". And then everyone in the bus clapped, I guess. And again, I get the intention behind these stories but they're so clumsily written.

And yes, these are sidequests - you are free to ignore them. But they do make up a considerable chunk of the game. And, unfortuantely, a fair handful of the main quests follow this same fetch quest formula.

This game goes long, very long stretches without anything substential happening. And it's good to have downtime to breathe - the game's big main story moments pack a punch in terms of epic adrenaline filled battles. But this game honestly feels like 60 hours of filler fetch quests with the occasional relevant story sequence sprinkled in between.

3.3 Visuals

I'm not a film student so maybe it's not my place to comment on cinematography, but I felt like visually many of the cutscenes were also really... bland. Not necessarily bad looking (if you can see anything behind the millions of particle effects) but it definitely felt like less care was put into choosing narratively interesting image composition compared to a game like FFXII.

And then it also does this really annoying thing where it will constantly fade to black for absolutely no reason.

Character A: Oh that seems like an exciting story! Tell me all about it. Character B: Okay, so this is a long story... [screen fades to black] [screen fades from black to the exact same shot we had before the fade] Character B: So the story goes like this... (starts telling the story you thought was told off screen indicated by the black sreen)

This and similar instances happen fairly often and I just don't get why. It's nothing to hate the game for but it's just... really strange. Just like those really silly "In the meantime..." text overlays for scenes that are very clearly happening in the meantime. Seriously, we get it. You don't have to spell it out. But whatever, this is one of those things I'd look past if it weren't for the whole rest of this trainwreck.

3.4 Characters

Speaking of trainwrecks. [Takes a deep breath] I've avoided this topic for long enough now. This is where the last seams that hold the game together break and make it fall apart entirely. This is where the pile of shit that's been tossed across the room finally hits the fan.

If you're remotely familiar with any Final Fantasy title you know how important a solid cast is to those games. Your allies and party members you meet over the course of the game, their stories and views on the world's happenings... a charismatic villain. Well, how about we just simply didn't have any of that.

3.4.1 The game's biggest mistake

FFXVI's writers made the decision to focus the game's narrative around a single character, our playable protagonist. There is a small supporting cast of characters that you meet, and occasionally travels alongside you temporarily, but most of them have... not much to them. The game makes it clear: This story is about Clive, and him alone.

And... I don't think having a story focused on a single character is necessarily a bad decision per se, even if highly unusual for a series that was driven by party systems for decades, but... If you decide to do that, then your protagonist needs to have more personality than a soggy wet sponge. It's bad enough that pretty much noone in this game has any sort of depth to them, but if you sideline literally every character in favour of your protagonist's narrative then... at least give that protagonist a character?

This man's personality is nothing beyond helping people because it's the right thing to do. The attempted "he feels guilty for killing his brother" (which naturally he didn't actually do, because that would be too complex of a story) subplot gets dropped a few hours in and he's just... that guy who runs everyone's errands with no input of his own. And it doesn't make him unlikeable necessarily, it just makes him terribly boring.

What is really, really grating however is how every other character portrays him. Named characters and unnamed NPCs alike will throw pity parties for him over and over, going on about how he's so self-sacrificial, always doing everything for others while never expecting anything in return and never taking enough care of himself. It's exhausting. We get it. He's the perfect heroic nice guy, just like his (slave having) dad, the unfailable king. And unlike his evil witch of a mother. Who is so evil, by the way. At times I felt like Clive was some sort of dream fantasy guy self insert of the writers.

I'll say it plainly now: the lack of a well developped playable party is, in my opinion, the game's downfall. Clive alone can't carry the narrative because there isn't nearly enough depth to him, and everyone else has deliberately been stripped of any sort of meaningful screentime. Narrative aside I also feel like multiple playable characters would have done a lot for more variety in terms of gameplay. And before you raise your pitchforks - yes, there are few, very few characters that have their own little story moment. But boy... at what cost.

3.4.2 The state of women

! Rape & suicide mention trigger warning for this section !

So you know, Clive's sidekick? No, not the dog, the girl. Jill. The one who spends most of the game sick in bed, kidnapped, or otherwise missing, and whose single personality trait is being Clive's pure and innocent love interest. Surprisingly, she has her own 30 minutes of side story! A side story that essentially boils down to finding out she was held captive by a weird cult that had no relevance prior to this point and will have no relevance at all after this point. You get to beat up the cult's leader who is revealed to sexually assault underage girls.

Is that ever addressed again at any point? No.

But worry not. We still have a few more women in the bigger roles of the game. One of them, Benedikta, is an early game antagonist whose entire thing is seducing men, and most of the screentime she has is sex scenes. Once you defeat her in battle she flees, and a randomly passing by group of bandits is implied to attempt to rape her. This triggers a flashback of a past assault she was rescued from, and she goes mad. You fight her again, now in her powered up form, and kill her. Then she gets decapitated and her head is sent in a box to her lover to fuel his man rage. Don't worry, you'll get more sex scene flashbacks with her after her death.

But hey. We have another woman in a leading role. The supposedly main antagonist before the real big baddie (who is so boring of a villain i can't even get myself to say anything more about him) is revealed to have business with her. Clive's evil slave-mistreating mum. Her purpose in the story is breeding a flawless heir. What fuels this dignified ambition? Hell if I know. She's written in a hateable way for the sake of it. Likely to contrast Clive and his flawless dad. Absolutely zero depth to anything.

Guess her age here.

If you guessed "at least in her 50s" you are correct! Do I even have to say anything more about this.

The moment her perfect heir is killed, she loses it and slits her own throat. A very anticlimatic conclusion to her non-existent character arc.

Yes, there are a couple more secondary female characters who aren't necessarily walking misogyny targets, but they're pretty much irrelevant to the plot.

Here's a quote from my girlfriend, who is a woman, about the state of women in this game: "I have scarcely felt this alienated by the depiction of women in a video game."

! Trigger warning ends here !

So, uh... how do we move on from here... Let's head somewhere less offensive.

3.5 Music

Usually I'd give the soundtrack a lot more attention since I'm of the opinion that music is one of the most vital parts in a game and can absolutely make or break it - but quite frankly I don't have much to say about this one in detail. It's largely generic epic orchestra music with nothing much unique going for it. The regular battle theme is fairly memorable; and then there's that really aggravatingly annoying acoustic guitar ambient song that seems to play for about half of the game's time. Seriously I hate that one. It drove me nuts. In general I don't know if there's more than 10 songs in the OST because I don't think I heard more than that. Either that, or they all sounded the same.

What stuck out negatively to me especially (apart from that godsdamned acoustic guitar) was the overusage of over the top orchestral arrangements for the tiniest occasions, which was unfitting at best and really tiring at worst. I got used to it with time, but still a good soundtrack isn't just making every moment sound like it's as epic as the final boss, it's making varied music that fits the moment and sets the ambience.

Also not to ruin the OST for anyone who actually enjoys it, but the game's leitmotif sounds like Army of Lovers' Crucified. Noticed it during the demo and couldn't unhear it for the entirety of the game. You're welcome.

4. Credit where credit is due

As should be evident by now, I'm not finding much redeemable in this game. And yet - I would be lying if I said I didn't find myself liking some aspects of it.

Some of the armour designs are pretty neat. In general the character design as a whole feels coherent and mostly fits the setting, some questionable haircut choices aside.

There are chocobos. In different colours. They look nice. Not a big surprise, I suppose.

The voice acting is really good. I can't comment much on the English dub since I only watched the demo in English and then watched the full game with a streamer who played in German; but the German voice actors did an amazing job, and I've heard only good things about the English cast as well. Listening to a few comparisons I was surprised how deep English Joshua's voice is. He sounds like a teenage boy even after the last timeskip in German. That took me out a bit. I also realized I'm very partial to Dion's German voice acting. His final scene was extremely strong in that regard.

Speaking of Dion....

4.1 It's personal again

Alright. Listen. I hate this. I fucking hate this. For weeks I suffered through this game, nothing but this burning passionate hatred within me, ready to shred and tear every single aspect of it apart.

And then. So close to the end. In the final stretch. When I've almost made it through with nothing but rage and hatred by my side. This fucking stupid garbage game attacks my one goddamn weak point: The gay prince and his lover share a small "it isn't meant to be" moment. And I genuinely enjoyed the little gestures in that cutscene. It was a good cutscene.

And at this point I was unfortunately confronted with a hard to swallow pill: I had been kinda looking forward to every time Dion showed up on screen. I'll be honest I'm not sure I would have made it through the game without the driving force of "hey maybe he'll show up again". Over time he turned into my single point of fixation, and it's sad because ultimately he too is pretty much a wet sponge of a character, though maybe the least wet and spongy one. I think he does have some of the stronger scenes in the game (as well as the most visually appealing boss battle - whatever was going on with that bullet hell laser fight in space). He's also unfortunately a sad blond Final Fantasy prince and. Uh. Yeah. Ahem. Alas, he's kinda ugly. Subjectively. But he has an absolutely mighty hip swing when he walks. And a pretty cool spear. Good weapon choice.

In general, props to SE for including an unambiguously gay character in a decently written way. We all know this company is pretty behind in terms of diversity and representation, so seeing that was a pleasant surprise.

Anyway I really REALLY hate to admit it but I've been kinda held hostage by the game over this stupid prince. I'm hoping this is a temporary side effect (derogatory) from being exposed to the game for a prolonged amount of time and in a few weeks I won't care anymore. I hate it here.

5. Conclusion

When I finally finished watching the game after having spent 2 entire months with it I was mostly asking myself one question... What is worse in regards to an art medium? To hate it so intensely that you're willing to dive into every little aspect of it; or to feel complete indifference?

I can't tell you if I think FFXVI is the worst game in the series. It's the one I feel the most passionate hate for, that's for sure. But a game like FFXV seems so inherently unappealing I don't even care to look at it. Not because I think I'll dislike it any more, I just think it will bore me. (Irrelevant side note - I do plan to finally watch a playthrough of that one too in the future. Might as well commit now.)

There are aspects of FFXVI I do think are inexcusable in an objective way; delicate topics handled badly, developers that need an attitude check, and also... by god go meet a woman in real life, please.

For a game that was said to modernize and move the series forward, it makes terribly outdated choices in many regards. It somehow tries so hard to be a departure from the other games in the series, losing a lot of what makes a good Final Fantasy game, and simultaneously clings so hard to references that feel so empty when the core of these games has been trampled on. No amount of preludes and FF1 overworld theme rearrangements and corny "this will be your final fantasy" puns can bring the series' essence back that this game failed to capture. A sense of adventure, a compelling story with a meaningful cast of companions, a world to explore beyond grey corridors.

It should have been a spin-off, not a main title game. Obviously a different name wouldn't have changed the quality of the game, but I can't shake off the feeling that had it been called FFXIV: The Offline Singleplayer Experience (which quite frankly it feels like in many regards), I might have been a bit more lenient with my judgement.

Still...public reception of the game seems, surprisingly, fairly mixed. My fears of the game being hailed as the second coming of Christ didn't actually become true. At the very least the gameplay is oftentimes heavily criticized. And while I really have to wonder if all the people who praise the story and character writing have watched the same thing as I have, seeing the game actually receive some nuanced opinions from both people who like and dislike it alike is a refreshing twist I didn't expect. (Just in case this comes across wrong: I don't consider my opinions to be nuanced. I'm just a hater. But I'm right. Ha.)

Well... uh... After all this I don't quite know how to end this. I feel like I've said more than anyone should say about this game and somehow nothing of substance at all. Topical, I suppose. Oh well. Congrats (I guess) to this game for sparking something in me (negative) no other game has ever done before. For all it's worth, it strengthened my bond to some of the older entries I used to judge more harshly. I know better now.

-----

If you're the single person who made it this far, I think you deserve to have some pictures. Here's my favourite battle phase: (Something about those symmetrical orb patterns was very aesthetically pleasing. Better in motion though.)

And here's an exclusive look at parts of my initial draft and some discord liveblogging:

anyway peace out ✌️ go watch dions death scene in german

#this is my villain origin story #and also the unskippable cutscene villain monologue i'll drop 3/4th through the story

[conkers-thecosy]

Hi conkers! I'm a big fan of your thilbo fan-fictions but I was wondering why does it take you so long to answer comments? I don't want to upset you because you seem nice but you should think about it because sometimes it makes me not write comments. It's hard to write comments so I would be annoyed if I did and then you didn't answer me. Just think about it.

Well hi there!

I'm so sorry you felt you had to send me this. I would never want anyone to feel like I don't appreciate any positive interaction I get on my fics! Truly, I cherish every single person who has ever read any of my nonsense, and hate to think I've not shown that!

I don't believe I've ever missed a response (please do correct me if I'm wrong though!) and I promise I make every effort to reply in a timely fashion. I'll be honest, I tend to save replying to longer comments until the weekend because I work full-time Mondays to Fridays, and I use my evenings to write, so in my head it makes sense for me to wait for a "day off" to answer comments and such.

I completely understand where you're coming from and I know that this month I've been particularly bad for it because I'm juggling multiple projects. Still, I will say that there are only so many hours in the day, so I'm happy to make a bigger push to respond to comments same day, but there will obviously be a knock-on effect with how frequently I update. So really, I guess it depends on what would be better from that perspective!

Also, I would never want anyone to feel obligated to comment on my stuff - if it's stressful or too difficult, please don't think you have to force yourself! I'm just happy knowing folks are reading, that's all I ever wanted!

Thanks so much for your honesty, I hope I've answered you here in a way that makes sense.

Have a good week!

Lola xx

#ask #anon #anon ask #conkers-theficwriter #fanfiction #conkers corner

[inkrabbit]

If I can't have you

I'm not immune to a scarier version of Mary.

The old horror movie plays as Mary sits on your couch, slowly eating his burger. They loved nights like these, lounging with you on the couch. Your apartment was a lot cleaner than theirs, and a lot more spacious. Not only that, but Mary found himself head over heels for you. While emotions had never been a particularly strong suit of his, they couldn't deny that they had finally fallen for you. What wasn't there to love? You were always so kind and understanding. You were always there to listen to him, even if others had turned away. Not only that, but the two of you got along perfectly. There was never any fights or disagreements. You two just worked. And while not all of your interests lined up, you both still had a lot in common.

Sitting on the couch next to you made their heart race as they thought about their feelings. Only recently did Mary finally decide to accept these feelings like an adult, but the whole “confession” aspect didn't come easy. They were sure you shared the same feelings, but actually verbally admitting they loved you more than a friend proved to be difficult.

“Oh! I forgot to tell you!” Your voice brings him out of his thoughts, the happy smile on your face making his heart melt. “Richard finally asked me out.”

And just like that, Mary's heart sank. They knew Richard, having met him a couple times whenever you brought him around the bar. Richard was cute, tall and a singer himself. But Mary knew Richard was better. Richard was the type of person you brought home to your parents, and he was the type of person to be immediately accepted into the family. Mary wasn't someone you could bring home, let alone be accepted by most families. It only made their heart break more.

“He did? Like, finally?” His tone carries a bit of resentment, but he tries to hide it. You happily nod, taking another bite of your own burger. Dammit, it stings. “So, you're going out with him, right?”

“Yeah. He wants to take me on a date tomorrow night.” Mary scans your face, seeing the joy in your eyes. A wave of nausea washes over. You were happy. You were happy Richard asked you out. You said yes to him.

“Huh...” They swallow thickly, trying to calm the rising jealousy that was making him sick. “I'm surprised you said yes, to be honest.”

“You know I've liked him for a while now. He's really sweet.” Sweet. Richard was sweet. Mary bites the inside of their bottom lip, putting too much pressure and feeling the skin break, the taste of iron flooding their senses.

“Yeah. Yeah, I know. Real sweet.” His tone is bitter as he seethes with jealousy. Come on, Mary, calm down. They had been so good with keeping their emotions in check. You brought them down. You made them feel better – less unhinged. But the thought of you with someone else...

Mary stands up as another bout of jealousy courses through. They have to leave before they act out. “I gotta get going. I gotta...” He snatches his jacket up, throwing it on. Your scent hits his nose, reminding him how perfect you looked wearing their jacket earlier that night.

“You okay?” You stare up at him with such innocence. You really didn't get it, did you? Their heart aches.

“Y-yeah, I'm fine. Just... got some shit I gotta do.” They give you a forced smile, swallowing down their emotions as head for the door. They're not even hungry anymore and the sight of their burger is making them even more sick. But still, they cast you once last glance. “I'll see you later.”

They hurry out of the apartment, closing the door behind them. The crisp night air greets him as he grits his teeth. Richard? Fucking Richard? What did that twink have that he didn't? Did you seriously like him more than you did them? Was Richard really that much better?

He takes a shaky breath, moving away from your apartment. Their mind races with thoughts. Had he known this was going to happen, he would've asked you out sooner. He would've confessed sooner.

“What the hell am I supposed do?” they grumble softly, running a hand through their messy hair. It wasn't fair. “That should've been me...”

They continue down the street, letting their emotions fester. Try as he might, he can't stop thinking about the news you just told him. With a smile on your face, too! Without a second thought, Mary turns, punching the wooden fence they were walking beside. The skin breaks on their knuckles, the wood splintering and embedding into their flesh. Fuck it. They could dig the splinters out later. Right now, it didn't matter. They couldn't control themselves.

And who was Richard to ask you out? He remembered that little bastard asking them if they had feelings for you. And Mary admitted to him, too! He told him that he liked you! But he still turned around and asked you out?

Mary felt that telltale snap somewhere deep inside their mind, where rationality goes out the window. They hadn't felt like this in a long time, and truth be told, they missed it. They hand moves to their waistband, fingers curling around the hunting knife they kept close.

“Tomorrow night, huh?” They couldn't let Richard take you on that date. Not after they had loved you for too long. So maybe it was time to pay Richard a little visit. He still remembered where he lived; a nice penthouse in downtown. You had taken Mary over for a little party before, one that he walked you home from. Not Richard. Mary wasn't as shitfaced and was able to carry you back to your apartment. But even through all of that, you still said yes to Richard.

Well... it's not like killing someone was something Mary's never done before.

#mary goore #gn!reader #technically I guess yandere!Mary??? #mentions of killing #mentions of blood #got some reassurance from someone so I finally got some confidence to swap around he/him and they/them in this fic