Cold and Dark (F!LavellanxCullen)
AN: Initially posted this on ao3 but I never go on there so I deleted it and decided to share here instead. (Using the default name, Ellana.)
Orders, pleas, prayers, and screams drown out the sound of the distant marching and the flames starting to engulf Haven. A trebuchet is aimed for the mountain top, but before it can be fired, a blighted looking creature approaches. Ellana urges her companions to get moving, hoping they won't stop when they realize she's no longer behind them. Ellana had planned to linger to set off the trebuchet, what she did not plan was almost being hit directly by the creature.
One moment, Ellana fears her life will end at the hands of the one that calls himself Corypheus, and in the next moment, she is falling through an opening in the ground, unsure of what her fate is any longer.
When she comes to, she finds herself in a dark, cold, and empty cave. She gets up, doing her best to ignore the pain that lances throughout her whole body. Nothing appears to be broken, just bruised with some scrapes here and there. Ellana lets out a hiss when she tries to look around, the back of her head throbbing, she remembers then, how Corypheus had thrown her against the trebuchet. The pain finally catching up now that her adrenaline is wearing out.
It's okay, nothing she can't handle.
Once she makes it out of the cave, she realizes how bad the situation is. The aftermath of the avalanche is making it nearly impossible to see, but she has to pick a direction and move forward. She finds a couple of campfires, and although they are old, they at least let her know she is going in the right direction.
Eventually the strong wind dies down as she continues up the mountain, but she is beyond exhausted. The cold is becoming unbearable, if she was cold before it's nothing to what she feels now. In fact, the cold seems to numb her to the pain she was feeling before, save for the scrapes that she's praying won't become infected. The sound of her teeth chattering surrounds her as she keeps trekking upwards. Just reach the top of the mountain. She keeps repeating to herself. But then what? What if there is no sign of anyone?
Ellana has been avoiding thinking about the others, afraid that there's a possibility she failed and the old campfires she found were of a very small group of survivors. Did her companions make it? A part of her regretted asking them to stay behind with her but they didn't even hesitate to follow her. Her mind then wanders to her last conversation with Cullen. "But what of your escape?" "Perhaps you'll surprise it, find a way." "If we are to have a chance, if you are to have a chance, let that thing hear you."
Ellana herself hadn't said much at the time. What could she possibly say to someone she's still getting to know but also likes? She finds it ridiculous to be thinking of something so trivial when her life is on the line, as well as the impending danger on all of Thedas if they can't figure out a way to put an end to Corypheus and his plans. Then a dark thought crosses her mind, Do they still need her? Does she want them to need her?
She is tired, and not just from trudging through the snow for who knows how long. Securing the templars aid took a toll on her. Being brought into her own mind and being forced to see what the envy demon planned to do while pretending to be her. Cole helped so much, but there was no time for her to discuss what happened, on a deeper level, with someone else.
Nightmares had kept her from getting a full night's rest. Ellana always waved away Josephine's comments about how she would wake before even Cullen. Most of those early mornings Ellana spent collecting elfroot, it benefitted Adan as well as gave her an excuse to wander away from everyone until she felt ready to rejoin everyone. On a few rare occasions, Cullen happened to wake at the same hours. Ellana noticed the look in his eyes, mirroring her own. A part of her wanted to bring up what had happened, if anyone, maybe he would understand. But she'd always back out and instead would ask him to spar with her. His eyes would lose the darkness to them, and she'd feel her mind clear.
Now though, all Ellana could think about was what was waiting for her at the top. Another campfire. As she walked past it, she felt the smallest bit of warmth. Looking back at it as she paused, she realized there were embers. A spark of hope ignited in her, as much as she didn't want to get her hopes up. Her body had reached past its limit but she couldn't stop now, if she stopped she wouldn't be able to get up again.
A few more steps, if they're nearby, she'll be able to see them from the top.
As Ellana reaches the top, she notices lights in the distance. Before she can react, she sees several figures running toward her. As they become clearer, a wave of relief washes over her. Inquisition soldiers, Cassandra and… Cullen. "There! It's her!"
They found her. Unable to stay standing any longer, Ellana falls to her knees.
The inquisition soldiers begin to reach for her but Cullen stops them, "I'll carry her." The soldiers step back as Cullen removes his mantle and drapes it across Ellana. The action doesn't even register to Ellana, nor what he's saying, until he reaches down and scoops her up in his arms. However, Ellana doesn't have the energy to react like she normally would at such a display; instead, she simply curls up against his chest, holding onto his mantle with what strength she has left. Through her teeth chattering, she thinks she hears Cullen say, "I'm sorry, my armor plate must not be helping with the cold." She's not sure though, her consciousness keeps slipping away even though she wants to stay awake as much as she can.
Her teeth chattering doesn't begin to subside until they near the campsite, but she's still very cold. To the left of her, Cassandra speaks quietly, "Commander." That single words earns a sigh from Cullen and she feels herself being handed off to one of the soldiers after a beat of silence. Ah, it must be a warning. Now is not the time for there to be new rumors surrounding her. Ellana opens her eyes and looks toward Cullen. He looks worried, well more worried than usual.
Something unspoken passes between them and she misses his warmth as soon as he lets her go onto the waiting soldier's arms. From the corner of her eye, Ellana sees another soldier approaching with a thick blanket. The soldier absentmindedly reaches for Cullen's mantle, which appears to have been a mistake. Cullen stops the soldier's hand in place, but seems to realize the situation he got himself into. He clears his throat and clarifies, "I'll do it." The soldier, afraid to say anything, simply nods and waits with the blanket in hand.
Cullen gently removes his mantle but instead of putting it on, grabs the blanket from the waiting soldier, and puts it over Ellana. It's not until he steps back and nods at the soldier in dismissal that he puts his mantle back on. At that final sight, Ellana can't help but be glad that she kept going.
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