👉🏻👈🏻 18 (from your let's play prompt) with bang chan??
monnieee~ tysm for requesting again♡ i really like the idea of detective chan. ahhh what a sunshine he is☀️
"I'm losing sleep." ft/ chan
wc: uhh like 1k
prompt #18
from my prompt list!
you [9:30pm] channie~ you are coming home tonight right?
my sunshine [9:32pm] yep im spending the night with my girl:)
you [9:33pm] lol finally
my sunshine [9:36pm] hey its not my fault some gansta is playing with my precinct
you [9:38pm] justhurryimsleepy
Chan was a police detective. The job had lately absorbed all of him due to recent arson cases throughout the city. It took all of his time, which you understood. The slim time you did get with him was in the late hours of the night only for him to vanish with the rising sun.
It took a toll on you; not spending time with him made you feel selfish for trying to at least see Chan. Last week, you tried bringing him homemade lunch, but the next day, you found the container sitting in your refrigerator untouched. He hadn't eaten.
His job is just as important as any, but what about his job as a boyfriend? You love Chan to the moon and back- times 3. Yet, right now, these attacks on the city made you feel lost without him.
you [10:37pm] what time are you coming home?
you [10:40pm] im tiredddd :(
my sunshine [10:59pm] hold on im coming
〰️
When it was well after midnight, you had enough.
With no signs of sleeping anytime soon, you threw on an overcoat and took an Uber to the station. On the way over, the bright voices from the radio mentioned a jewelry shop that burned earlier today. That explains why he isn't returning my messages, you figured.
The town was hazy with lingering traces of smoke. There were thankfully no fatalities, but the fires kept coming... anonymously.
The station lights were still on; then again, the city never sleeps. And the police, especially now, were the city.
"Ah, y/n. It's a little late for a lady to be out and about, don't you think?" The desk clerk, Jisung, prodded.
"I'm here for Chan."
He grinned. "The detective's late for bed, huh?"
You lightly hit his shoulder as Jisung led you through the office with a visitors badge.
Chan was in his office looking absolutely stunning despite the bloodshot eyes and bags which fell from them. How can he look this good when he's hardly slept and eaten?
Jisung stopped near his door and gestured you through before skipping back to his round Candy Crush at the desk. The boy was way to happy at this time of night.
You didn't bother to knock, knowing full well he wouldn't even notice. You stepped to his desk and whispered, "Chan?"
"Hmm." He didn't bother to look at you.
"You coming home?"
"I have to finish this file; I'll leave it on Minho's desk for-"
All words abruptly left him as he faced you. He was too focused to recognize your voice; he didn't even know it was you standing in front of him until he looked up from the files. He truly was lost in his workload. Chan glanced at the clock set on his desk, 01:12am.
Shoot.
"Y/n, baby I'm sorry." He hid in the palms of his hands. "Let me finish up and then we'll go, ok?"
You huffed, eyeing the unopened salad near his keyboard. "Chan. You haven't eaten. You've barely slept. I think the Sergeant will be fine if you call it a night."
"He wanted me to get this done; the more we shall on catching whoever's behind this, the longer these attacks will continue." Chan groaned; he rubbed his temples and closed his eyes. He was clearly exhausted. "I can't just up and leave."
Was he choosing work over you? Oh no. You were not allowing him to pull that card. You stepped closer and leaned into his face gently.
"Chan. I'm losing sleep because of you. I can't sleep without you. Please, come home. You deserve and need a break." You intended to sound strong, but your tone was desperate and fragile, no doubt from lack of sleep.
His chocolate orbs nervously met yours. You were right. He had been neglecting you- choosing work over you.
Chan knew you couldn't sleep without him, but he was selfish and tried to ignore it. The case had infected his mind like a parasite, leaving no room for you.
Gosh, I'm awful.
He raised to his feet with a defeated sigh. His slumped posture approached you.
"I'm sorry." Chan's eyes locked on yours. His large palms caressed your forearms lovingly; you sighed into his warm touch, realizing you missed him so much more.
Chan reached for his bag and coat before flicking off his desk light. "Let's go home, yeah?"
You hummed in reply and closely followed him out of the small office.
"You got him out, y/n," Jisung smirked. Chan swiped his badge through the identifier signaling his leave. "I hadn't expected you to make him drop the case just for bed."
"Mission accomplished, I guess." You shrugged, far too tired to respond with anything more. As you walked out the door, Chan finally became aware of your mode of transportation. Since he had the car, you didn't drive here...
"You called an Uber?" He almost growled the question; Chan was furious that he allowed his girl to ride in an Uber after dark. The city was far from safe when the moon replaced the sun. Being a cop, he knew this all too well.
"Yeah. I was worried about you. You weren't answering my texts either. What else was I supposed to do?"
"Call an officer to escort you to the station house."
You scoffed at his quick reply. "No."
"No?" He stopped walking and held open the passenger door for you like the gentleman he was. He leaned over the door and stared at you; your response puzzled him.
"No. Because this won't happen again," you commanded while buckling the safety belt.
"You're right." He stiffened and closed your door. Did I upset him? You worried.
He opened his side and slumped comfortably into the driver's seat. He buckled and started the engine.
"It won't ever happen again, love. I'm so sorry." Chan took your precious, little hands in his. His eyes locked yours, and he brought them to his plush lips. "No more nights like this. I promise."
"Thank you," you softly hummed while snuggling against your seat. You eagerly slid your hand into his. This is where you both belonged.
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[Translation] BUBKA (Feb’19) Goto Rara interview
It’s been a (long) while since the last time I posted on tumblr.
To be honest, I didn’t plan to release this translation upon her grad announcement but...well, here I am. She’s the type of going all out on everything she does anyway,so I’m happy for whatever choice she made. In this interview, she said she loves living a busy life. Maybe she’s found that university life is busy enough lol (or maybe planning to study abroad??) Enjoy reading!
The reason of “gap”
- It’s the first gravure shooting after you came back.
Rara: Thank you so much! (clap)
- Your expression is somehow…
Rara: Has it changed?
- I guess it looked pretty relaxed.
Rara: It was fun! I was really looking forward to it. It was a shooting session and I was also the only one there, I thought ‘I wonder what it feels like?’
- It was also the first time for the photographer to shoot for this magazine. Felt so frantic (laugh)
Rara: Though it was her first time, she conveyed her heedfulness well and also concerned if it went as what she planned. I really look forward to how it will be published.
- We think that it’s quite good. Well, you came back on stage on Nov.6 after half year of absence, but wasn’t the feeling different from before?
Rara: I was very nervous since it was a long time, but beyond that, I felt sorry for members that they need to remember new position as I came in. So, I was worried how everyone would think.
- And how was it actually? What did they think?
Rara: There were some who seems to have it tough but still said “welcome back” to me. I’m glad. There were also some members that I meet for the first time (laugh)
- You were apart only in that period of time. How did you spend your days?
Rara: I went to school and went to cram school as it is on my way home. For weekends and summer vacation, I went to cram school all day. Though I passed university’s AO entrance exam, I also thought of it in case AO is futile. The pass rate is also not much different from general entrance exam. So, I studied like I was going to take general entrance exam.
(T/L note: AO (Admission Office) entrance exam = the admissions office of a university decides who is admitted based on the student’s application, interview and an essay test.)
- Like an ordinary high school girl.
Rara: Very ordinary (laugh)
- How about your consciousness of being “SKE48’s Goto Rara”?
Rara: None. But, even when I’m in SKE48, I’m not so conscious about it. That’s why…(laugh)
- Hahahaha
Rara: I don’t mind it at all
- However, we think that there must be something different between an ordinary high school girl Goto Rara and SKE48 Goto Rara.
Rara: Umm, of course there was always the sense of urgency. Going to school in the morning, getting out of class early for work, going to work and getting back home late at night, then going to school in the morning again. Since it was like that every day, so without SKE48, maybe the sense of urgency had disappeared. But, instead of that, I need to study. So, it was another kind of difficulty.
- Exam was certainly tough. And in SKE48, you also had difficult time, right?
Rara: Yep, yep.
- (Matsui) Jurina-san was also on hiatus.
Rara: There was also 10th anniversary.
- That’s right. When you came back, is there any point that makes you think SKE48 atmosphere has changed?
Rara: Umm, I guess it hasn’t changed. But, I heard from senior’s opinion regarding the movie “Idol” that there’s a gap (of view) between early gens and later gens towards SKE48. I was like “Ahhh…”
- “Ahhh…” (laugh) I watched it, too. In that movie, the so-called “early gens” are the ones who decide SKE48’s direction, right?
Rara: Yeah.
- The movie was portrayed that the aiming direction should be equally decided by SKE48 as a whole.
Rara: Yeah.
-About this, actually, I wonder if the gens like Rara-san’s gen and the later gens would feel constrained. I became a bit worried.
Rara: Umm…how should I put it? But, everyone has their own dream, everyone has their own thought about the future, it’s separate. I think it’s different in each individual. It doesn’t have to be all the same. For me, I really love SKE48 that everyone becomes one when performing a live performance. So, when it comes to live performance, there are no such things like “gap” or “individual”. We did it with the thought that ‘I will not lose to seniors’, with the same feeling as them. We enjoy just as much as them.
- “feeling” or “the feeling of a gap”, of course it’s not what we can see with eyes, especially, for the receiving side.
Rara:Yeah, right.
- This is difficult, though (laugh)
Rara: The longer I stay in SKE48…The more I think that seniors really put their lives into it. Talking about the weight (of the feeling they have for SKE48), I think it’s absolutely different. Well, we have different way of living. Therefore, if someone tells me “(the feeling is) different”, then it certainly is different.
- I couldn’t agree more.
Rara: For example, giving that there were 2 choices, as the time passed by, it became as 1. The weight (of feeling) would get heavier, right?
- This is such a substantial conversation, talking about ‘Is this the only way?’ ‘Isn’t it so?’
Rara: Yeah. Since I still haven’t watched the movie so I don’t know what was being said there. I wonder whether that is “the feeling of a gap” or not. But from my point of view ‘even though there are a lot of differences, do we hold the same feeling when we work as SKE48 or perform lives?’ I thought to myself. I don’t think we are losing to seniors on this point.
- Working in a group called ‘SKE48’, performing live shows and lightening up together with fans, all of these feelings have never changed.
Rara: Even those other young gens, I think the feeling of fun hasn’t changed. I’m also like that.
Things I noticed
- You are having fun, everyone is also having fun because it’s “Rara”, right?
(T/L note: Rara’s name contains the word “fun/enjoy” )
Rara: Yes (laugh). However, up until now, I have thought that it’s fine as long as I can have fun. Even in theater stage performance…because I’m a shy person, I couldn’t make eye contact with fans. Is it called response? Right? I’m really not good at it. Since I couldn’t look them in the eyes, I always look far ahead.
- You were staring far ahead although it’s theater (laugh)
Rara: It’s embarrassing!! But, the things like ‘not looking because I’m shy’ or ‘enjoying it’, I think maybe it’s my own satisfaction. It may sound extreme, but even in handshake events, I would wear the outfit I like rather than the one that would please the fans. I am who I am. It’s like I don’t want to be tainted. When fans told me something, I would go “yeah, yeah…but!” However, once I tried to pull away from it, when I thought that I want to fulfill my dream, the power from fans that are supporting me is definitely indispensable. I began to think that I have to return it properly to those people.
- Because there are people who support you, you keep being an idol. Something like that?
Rara: Yeah. ‘Because I am like this, nevertheless’ I continued just like that…You may understand if you are 15 years old (laugh). Looking at it now more calmly, that was unfair. Wasn’t it only me gaining one-sided? Didn’t I return anything?
- You gained it, anyway. (laugh)
Rara: I felt strongly that I gained it even if I know it’s one-sided! So, for the people who are supporting me right now, though they may think that it is okay for me to gain, I can’t leave it like that. I want to return it.
- Even doing something embarrassing.
Rara: Huhu…yes (laugh) Argh, it’s embarrassing. I really adore people who can do something like flying kiss or wink! It’s cool!
- Cool (laugh) How about try doing it?
Rara: That can’t be! No way, no way, no way! I still can’t make eye contact properly. Even in handshake events, some also said “you divert your eyes”. I talked to them while I was looking away.
- Being idol is tough.
Rara: It’s tough! (laugh) If I were not an idol, I wouldn’t mind about this at all.
- During your hiatus, was there any moment that you thought ‘it’s fine even if I’m not coming back’?
Rara: Um…No.
- Something like ‘isn’t it fun to live like a normal university student?’
Rara: I never thought of that. I never thought living a normal life is fun. I think I wouldn’t be satisfied with that. Maybe, it’s because I have been living a busy life all along, I don’t like lazing around at home.
- If you were not an idol, is there a way to not laze around at home?
Rara: But I have no interest in clubs. Even though I once entered a very strict club, I still felt ‘so boring’ (laugh). There were also many unreasonable things. I really hate that. So, I wanted to come back quickly when I was on hiatus. It wasn’t enough for me.
- So you are not sending mail (SKE48 mail) so frequently (laugh)
Rara: Huhuhu! Yes, not frequently (laugh). I was told that I can send it whenever I like so I send it when I feel ‘I’m so tiredddd’
- Did you watch anything about SKE48? General Election, for example.
Rara: I watched it! When I was on the way back from cram school, they were announcing Senbatsu and Suda (Akari) san didn’t get called yet. Then, she got 2nd place! At that time, I was in tears.
- Why was that?
Rara: Well…I was so happy. I was happy when Suda-san got 2nd place. And at that moment when I knew that (Matsui) Jurina-san got the 1st place, I was really happy. I was like ‘this is so nice’ because I love both of them.
- Actually, many things happened when you were not here. Did you contact with any member? Obata (Yuna) san also wrote on Twitter ‘That dork is back’
Rara: Nihihihhi! Yunana (laugh). There wasn’t any member that I talk with all the time but there were some that I talk with quite often, like Maayan (Sugawara Maya). I knew that Maayan entered AKB48 Senbatsu.
- Time flies (laugh). Since Rara-san is back, what is your goal hereafter?
Rara: I want to do works involved with speaking! In the future, my dream is to become an announcer.
- It has been this one all along, right?
Rara: Though it has been this all along, it has never been so clear. I want to try a lot of things but when I was on hiatus, I watched “Dodesuka!” (a news report program on NagoyaTV), there was an announcer called Natchan-san (Shiojiri Natsuko). I always got a lot of power from her. It’s amazing that she can make people think ‘I will do my best today, too’ even if she can’t see them. So, I decided that I want to be announcer.
- Ohh, you will definitely make it.
Rara: Ah…maybe (laugh). I feel strongly that I want to become announcer.
- We are looking forward to Goto Rara who is back as idol. And, please make your dreams come true.
Rara: Yes! Ah, it was so much fun, today! I want to see the photos soon.
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