#and like. it wouldve been really smart to do that. but | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

todayisafridaynight · 9 months

Note

Throwing in fun (not fun) facts to contribute esp bc I was tagged in the essay: (Sorry in advance this is literally my career and special interest AND I just got back from a training conference about this SO obv I am going to talk too much. Disclosure: These statistics are from peer-reviewed sources AND the National Children's Alliance. The NCA IS an American association, though, so take this all with a grain of salt bc we're applying it to someone whose bg is not American lmao. This is an essay for funsies. CW: discussion of and stats about CSA, Child Abuse) Relevant to the Jo stuff is also that victims of one/any kind of abuse are statistically much more likely to subsequently face overlapping abuse, so knowing he comes from a home where abuse and potential neglect was actively occurring sets Jo-boy up for some sad statistics. I am looking for my notes on the stats for that but it's something stupid high, I wanna say over 30 or 40%.

Additionally, 47%~ of CSA victims are revictimized. Abysmal statistic but mostly just an interesting note if this IS the case/if we choose to interpret Jo this way bc of the other things mentioned in Masu's ask, specifically if we're viewing his unhealthy and ultimately traumatic relationship with Ikumi as a potential example of that revictimization (similarly, coming from a like background, it may have been revictimizing for Ikumi if she had ever experienced something like CSA, as well. It's one of those cases where they both got hurt even if neither of them were at fault for "playing house" as Jo calls it).

Seconding/Adding on to Masu's thoughts about Jo's behavior being as self-destructive as it is because of the compounded trauma of his life, victims of adolescent abuse "engage in health-risk behaviors such as substance use, physical fighting, and risky sexual activity," in far higher numbers than non-victims. We know for facts that adolescent Jo checks at least 2 of those 3 boxes, and that he still puts himself in unnecessary danger as a full grown adult (the Heian Tower fight, and Hoshino's Office fight): An interesting and well-written cycle of trauma and abuse on RGGs part, tbh, but also so narratively telling about how he saw/sees/continues to see himself as more an object than a person. (Love your notes on that btw, it rings very true. I could write an essay on that alone tbh.)

Another weird little thing I notice from both a Doyalist AND Watsonian perspective: Jo's disclosure of his father's abuse would classify as what we call an "accidental disclosure" in the field even though it's clearly intentional that he shares it with Ichi - it's offhanded and markedly unimportant in the story he's telling. He says it passively in a literary sense, as well: "The only thing waiting for me at home was my father's fists." Like homie, that's the most roundabout way you could have said "My dad beat me." Interestingly, up to 50% of [specifically CSA] victims do not state outright that abuse occurs, but disclose it accidentally/offhandedly; and in general, accidental disclosure is more common among people who have also delayed disclosure. Up to 66% of admissions from victims of child abuse come delayed if they come at all.

I think it's a very in-character remark of him to make, but statistically, it lines up with other victims of abuse as a whole. I think it's also just cool that from the Doyalist perspective, writing his lines in this way was intentional. It's part of the whole "Everything Jo says sounds like it could mean more than one thing" thing. He speaks poetically - it's intentional not just for the character but for the writer.

Okay, I'm done for now I'm sorry I just wanted to throw some added stuff into the convo bc I love applying my everyday usage of adolescent-focused trauma care and pysch shit to blorbos and seeing what sticks. Anyway, I also have a shit ton of thoughts on Masumi Arakawa as an abuse survivor but THATS another essay I won't dig into now. If I am still in your good graces after this long ass spiel I will consider it not only amazing but perhaps even cool as hell.

[ continuity of this ask ]

#long post #cw csa #its related im keeping it LMAO #snap chats #love the implication that you'd be 'out of my good graces' for sending this LMAO NO YOURE FINE WHY WOULD I BE MAD #i wouldve chewed out masu at this point if that were the case i enjoy readin these #the thing is we just have to accept im very stupid and wont have a lot of commentary. just quiet note taking #and i very much do appreciate posts like these cause its a nice reminder for things im aware of but have become very passive to #like jo's passive exposure of his traumas is something im aware of and because of that i dont focus on it as much as i should #so thank you- to you and masu for writing as extensively as you do #again im just very dumb so i wont have anything else to add on that hasnt been already said #or it wont be anything i can just sit and write in a couple of minutes its something thatd prob take a while to write as in-depth as i want #which is why i feel bad for responding. Not At All with these types of asks LMAO CAUSE EVIDENTLY a lot of effort is done by you guys #and i appreciate it a lot so thank you again for writing in #arakawa as an abuse survivor is something i think of a lot and remembering his abuse as a child shines light on his actions and mentality #so i mean if you wanna share your thoughts on that go ahead ! just know. i prob will Also not have a lot to add on to it LMAO #LIKE THE BEST WAY I CAN INTERPRET MY LINGUISTIC INEPTITUDE IS JUST ME LISTENING my sister tells me i listen really well #and i do enjoy listening. because again im not smart enough to think of things on my own or i dont think its worth sharing some things #so always happy to read whatever you want to share

6 notes · View notes

runayachi · 2 years

Note

Incredibly interested in what loonathehaikyuu is

omggg ok so i ended up getting really sick for a bit and didn't see this. anyways it's just a karasuno loonaverse au!

i'm not going to share any snippets, mostly because i wanna redo the casting, so here's some vague ideas (the loonaverse is also hella chaotic which is the real reason i scrapped this. so this is no plot just vibes)

for those of you who know nothing about loona. the universe is a morbius strip, meaning that there's two sides to one connected loop (morbius strip is an actual thing, i'd look it up cuz it's pretty cool). it's the normal world and the flip side is called eden. eden is restrictive. you can traverse between worlds.

third years are oec! daichi is kim lip (can make copies of herself), suga is jinsoul (can teleport), and asahi is choerry (can travel through mirrors. or something).

1/3 is the second years! ennoshita is heejin (creator of the loonaverse), narita is hyunjin (...a furry? as far as i can tell), kinoshita is haseul (killed her birdself which was bad!), nishinoya is yeojin (went missing), and tanaka is vivi (an android).

yyxy is the first years :) tsukishima is yves (left eden first), yamaguchi is chuu (followed yves out of eden), hinata is gowon (went with yves and chuu to leave eden), and kageyama is olivia hye (was left behind).

since yamaguchi is chuu, yes he almost froze to death and yes he's in love with tsukki.

suga is jinsoul because jinsoul helped olivia leave eden. suga helps kags leave. i had something poetic about suga helping kags as a setter but mmm u get what i mean, right.

tanaka convinces tsukki to leave eden. yamaguchi and hinata are not ones to be left behind (yes this is a tanaka-tsukishima-yamaguchi love triangle with hinata just following them out of eden)

suga and kags probably killed tanaka and that's why he's a robot now.

i have no idea what the 1/3 girlies are doing except heejin's god. so. ennoshita can be god and the rest of the second years can have a good time doing whatever it is normal people do. except noya because he went missing (but that makes sense too right like krsn lost their libero...loona lost yeojin...also yeojin's the fourth girl and noya's number is four. are you picking up what i'm putting down)

hinata has the unenviable task of going back and trying to rescue kageyama and also kinoshita. for that to happen, he is going to have to turn back time. it's cool though because he regrets leaving kageyama in the first place.

kageyama burned the moon lmao

and none of this would've happened if they gave kageyama a damn lollipop

#My fic #lyz speaks #oh no vero gave me an excuse to talk about my favorite things: loona and hq #the loonaverse is sooo fucky tho and im not smart enough for it #im kidding about the last bullet point btw #since i included the so what mv i thought itd be funny to add that little addition #cuz there's been so much destruction in the loonaverse #and when flip that dropped everyone was like wow ok so they just had to be nice??#and so i was like. lol kags burned the moon #and then i was like and none of it wouldve happened if they were nice!#so yeah. anyways. as u can see this really is just vibes #truly dont know whats up with 1/3 which is partly why this is such a mess #hope it made sense if it didnt well. they say u need a masters to get the loonaverse #and theyre right! u do

5 notes · View notes

magniloquent-raven · 2 years

Note

robin?

SHE

#about the ''everyone is wrong about them but me''#i have seen some Takes™️ about her characterization in s4 alright #and while i do think that the duffers are just. kinda bad as follow thru and consistency #robin being more talkative & awkward in s4 really isnt that hard to justify in-universe #like when we first meet her she's just steve's coworker who is starting to realize she kinda likes hanging out with him #and in s4 she's not only closer friends with steve and therefore probably more comfortable around him #which would change the way she presents herself #but having someone she can totally be herself around could very well change her overall behaviour #idk ive just seen some posts going around saying that she was so smart and cool in s3 and now she's ramble-y and weird and im like #wow. okay.#i came out of s4 being like ''hm she was very autistic coded this season. neat''#so idk man seeing people equate her being less guarded with her being...dumbed down?#sus #like. yeah this season hasnt brought up the fact that she speaks several languages and is very gifted in that sense but #its not like it wouldve been especially relevant to anything they've done so far #her being really smart about this one thing might've been like. at the forefront of her character in s3 but #yknow. that doesnt mean Smart About Stuff is all she's allowed to be

4 notes · View notes

iclimbtreestofeelalive · 4 months

Text

okay. heres the thing right. ive seen my fair share of "homeschoolers are weird freaks" jokes. and they are (source: i was one) however id actually like us to, with the power of hindsight, examine that because holy shit im tired of it

heres a list of kids i knew when i was homeschooled.

- me (trans in the south, intense adhd)

- my sister (dyslexic, autistic)

- my other sister (adhd and INTENSE emotional dysregulation)

- an autistic girl who had trouble socializing

- her brother who couldnt go to public school because of a heart defect

- another autistic girl with mast cell activation syndrome (medically and severely allergic to everything, now a very successful painter)

- yet another autistic girl who had been bullied into leaving the school system

like. "ooo homeschoolers are awkward and weird and dont know how to behave" yes, that's because they're almost entirely neurodivergent and disabled. in my experience, kids who aren't homeschooled for religious reasons are almost universally homeschooled Because they were weird and awkward and didnt get along with others. it becomes way less funny when you were homeschooled and saw exactly what kinds of people were your peers.

#homeschool #like. yes it wasn't the best choice for me specifically #i needed immense amounts of social interaction that i wasnt getting at home #but if my sister had been in public school from a young age it wouldve Broken her #public school is a blessing of the modern world and we are lucky to have it #and also. the people who forgo it usually do so for a reason #anyway this is a really niche post born out of a specific bruise on my childhood self #it felt very bad as a kid to see 'homeschoolers' as a stereotype get made fun of #since. those were my Friends who didnt go to school because they either physically couldnt #or had been bullied out of it #i was also lucky enough to have a parent who was incredibly smart #and taught me all the important things before i went into school in fourth grade

1 note · View note

hannieehaee · 2 months

Note

Could you make a seventeen reaction where they accidentally make fun of her in front of the other members? Angsty with a fluff end plss ☺💕

accidentally making fun of you in front of the members

content: established relationship, angsty, the members being dumb basically (but they didnt mean to!), fluffy ending, etc.

wc: 1361

a/n: i left the thing that they teased/made fun of you about very ambiguous so its up to interpretation! hope u enjoy <3

masterlist

seungcheol -

he wouldnt have been thinking of anything but his own entertainment when he made some mention of an embarrassing detail about you. it was a bad trait of his, but sometimes he wouldnt really think about the effect his words would have on others. this would sometimes cause him to put other people on the spot or embarrass them with what he thought to be a lighthearted joke. he'd, however, notice that his comment bothered you, which would lead him to constant apologies and promises to never making fun of you in front of the members again, knowing how awkward it felt to be made fun of in front of the crowd of twelve felt like.

jeonghan -

jeonghan knew that he could sometimes be a little annoying when he teased and probed at people out of sheer entertainment. he would usually gauge who he could joke around with, and who may not appreciate his humor. you, being the former, would leave him confused when you scoffed at him and stormed away when he played a prank on you in front of the members. he'd realize he offended/embarrassed you just as you left, feeling like an idiot (re: asshole) for making his sweet angel feel bad. would ignore the members' scoldings in order to chase after you so that he could coo and baby you to make up for his mistake.

joshua -

he could get a bit ... mean when he got around to joking with his friends (have you seen that clip of him coming after kwan while on that one variety show like !\€|£\), and you would be no exception. whether you shut down or retaliated after his comment, he would still realize he mightve gone too far right away. he'd feel awkward apologizing while still in front of his friends, so he would just be smart and shut up for the rest of the day. would try to get on your good graces throughout the rest of the day by making you laugh or by embarrassing himself in order to atone for his previous stupidity.

jun -

he would be a bit confused upon seeing you walk away wordlessly as soon as he made a little quip about how you weren't that good at some skill you had just claimed to be an expert at. it was just a lighthearted joke that you had even laughed at before! so why were you annoyed at him? he wouldnt mean this in an accusatory way, but more so in a confused way. one of his members would have to explain to him that maybe saying such things in front of others would make you feel embarrassed, in which case he would immediately face palm and chase after you with apologies already spilling out of his mouth.

soonyoung -

he probably wouldve been trying to fill the silence or something, not even realizing he had made fun of you whilst in the middle of conversation with his friends. following even more silence due to his stupid comment, one of the members would immediately scold him and tell him he was the one who deserved to be made fun of for speaking so carelessly. it'd all be lighthearted in nature but he would feel incredibly bad as soon as someone pointed out how his comment mightve hurt your feelings.

wonwoo -

cant really imagine wonwoo doing this even by accident but assuming in some alternate universe that he did, i think he would have an instantaneous 'oh, fuck' moment as soon as he caught a shift in your demeanor as the conversation with his members continued. you wouldnt mention it, knowing it was an accident and that he had only meant what he said as a lighthearted jab like the ones he would say towards his members. however, he wouldnt let it go without bringing it up in order to apologize for having made you feel any type of negative emotion because of him – especially in front of his friends.

jihoon -

he'd be so dumbfounded at you suddenly scoffing and walking away in annoyance. had he done something ... ? he'd need clarification from one of the members in order to realize that maybe he shouldnt have made you the butt of some dumb joke in front of all his friends. he'd face palm and groan at his lack of attention for your feelings, immediately running after you to apologize and to give you total amnesty to mock him whenever you so wished in order to even the scales between you two.

seokmin -

i cant imagine seokmin ever making fun of is s/o ever lmao but just for the sake of imagination, i think he wouldnt even realize his mistake until you started giving him the cold shoulder. he'd still be trying to interact and joke around with you only to be met with huffs of annoyance from you or just straight up dismissal of his presence. he'd eventually have an 'oh shit' moment and realize why you were acting that way. this would be subsequently followed by constant pleas for forgiveness, even pulling out all theatrics possible (re: getting on his knees, writing you an apology letter, self deprecation, etc.) in order to get you to forgive him.

mingyu -

he was just trying to join in on the joke! he could sometimes get tired of always being the one getting teased, so he thought that maybe he could tease you for a change. he had not planned this through, however, not realizing that making fun of you in front of his friends would immediately lead you to curse at him and storm out as he stood there dumbfounded. the entire thing wouldve backfired on him seeing as he would now get teased about this by his members and would have to go find you to apologize.

minghao -

even though i think he's super in touch with his emotions (and in turn your own), i dont think he would even realize he had made you the butt of the joke until a bit later, when he noticed your demeanor shifted and you were now on the sidelines rather than participating in conversation. when you told him what happened, he wouldve immediately apologized, feeling a bit embarrassed that he had offended you without even realizing it. he would think of this often and try and analyze his own behavior to avoid ever doing this again.

seungkwan -

he can get a little carried away with his jokes sometimes (re: every interaction he ever has with chan in gose), so this would probably happen a few times in your relationship. every time, he would feel like a horrible boyfriend and immediately try to do some damage control in order to make up for whatever stupid comment he made to you in front of the members. he would embarrass himself or even give you ammunition to embarrass him with to get you feel less hurt by his lack of thinking.

vernon -

oh fuck. he would notice your shift in demeanor immediately, and so would the rest of the members. this would create an extremely awkward moments, with the members immediately scolding vernon as soon as you walked away. he'd also be scolding himself in his head right before chasing after you to plea for your forgiveness. would justify himself by saying he was an idiot and he had a tendency of not thinking things through whenever he was joking around with friends. he'd pout and whine until he broke you down enough to forgive him.

chan -

as soon as the stupid words left his mouth, he would get scolded by twelve men (plus you) over thinking he could get away with trying to make fun of you in such a setting. did he have no respect for his perfect and amazing s/o whom he did not deserve (not your words, but those of his members)? there would be no chance for you to even feel bad or embarrassed due to his comment since he would get bullied over it immediately, making the situation not escalate.

#seventeen fanfic #seventeen x reader #svt fanfic #svt x reader #seventeen #svt #seventeen imagine #seventeen oneshot #svt imagines #svt oneshot #seventeen scenarios #svt scenarios #seventeen reaction #svt reactions #svt angst #seventeen angst #svt fluff #seventeen fluff

737 notes · View notes

favouritefi · 3 months

Note

I would be super fascinated to learn more about how Peglar's views re. If humans get to be people why can't I, affects his relationship with Bridgens - and really just about how they came to be in/navigate through that relationship. Your art is adorable and I love it doubly more so for the amount of care and consideration you have for the inner works of creating a dog/cat boy world. :)

aw thank you this au really is my brain going "crack treated seriously" and somehow making This and im glad other ppl enjoy it too. i have a lot of thoughts on this in terms of how much history to keep and how much to disregard so its under the cut:

so apparently in the book (which i have not read and do not plan to read) bridglar met on the hms beagle and as far as i can tell thats completely made up bc peglar was sailing w the east india company at the time.

then theres the show weirdness of bridgens being like in his 50s/60s when irl bridgens was in his 20s and this makes more sense bc as far as i can tell the position of steward was usually one reserved for younger men so for 50smth bridgens to be jfj's steward is a little odd and esp odd if hes a human in a position that is typically meant for cat/dogboys so my logic for this is that either 1) jfj requested bridgens to be his steward or 2) bridgens requested to be jfj's steward and either option would mean giving bridgens and jfj a slightly closer relationship than what they have in show canon which is fine that just means peglar and bridgens likely met during the first opium war but then how they met is still a mystery bc peglar would be aboard the wanderer with hodgson and bridgens would be on the cornwallis/clio with jfj so like ???

POINT BEING for all the reasons above ive handwaved away exactly how they meet but AT SOME POINT they do meet during the first opium war. peglar was the one who initiated the relationship tho the two of them did have mutual feelings for each other before committing to anything and bridgens is deffo the kinda guy who would go all "i would love you no matter what species you are" and actually mean it and peglar. ok so. i have a lot of thoughts about peglar.

so irl peglar was lashed for drunkeness and mutinous conduct while serving with the east indian company and for catboy peglar i like to imagine that travelling to places where cat/dogboys arent treated the way they are treated in england really opened his eyes and his mind to the idea of being treated like a person and this is obviously not a mindset that human officers want him to have and hence why he was lashed. he then served on the wanderer fighting against the slave trade and thats another chance to see a different type of human-to-cat/dogboy relationship even if he wouldnt have had as many opportunities to live amongst the locals as he did while with the east india company. and peglars like, smart. part of the reason why bridgens falls in love w him is bc of his intelligence and cheek and wit and peglar knows that britiannia's "civilizing mission" is bogus because while they are trying to abolish slavery on one hand they are also actively enforcing Company rule in India on the other and bc peglar has seen both sides of that he has Thoughts about it, Thoughts he didnt dare share with anyone until bridgens coaxed it out of him and to his surprise bridgens agreed with him.

bridgens, being well read and well educated, also knows that the way england treats cat/dogboys is the exception and not the rule and really like cherishes peglar and loves him like truly loves him and is thus completely aware of and careful of their uneven power dynamic here and wouldve never been the first to initiate anything for that very reason. and its not easy to navigate this forbidden relationship but peglar makes it worth it and both of them did worry that maybe this was merely a maritime romance but in the months between the war and the expedition they managed to sneak in lowkey dates on land and found that they were still very much compatible and it really makes things all the more tragic that bridgens cant afford to adopt peglar outright and ensure that henry lives out the rest of his days in peace curled up next to the fire with a good book and smiling whenever he catches john staring at him and god, they are so in love.

#purror and erebark

29 notes · View notes

gartenofbanny · 7 months

Note

100% agree w the other anon talking abt the look at this song. but what really pisses me off the most is that they have the incredible alex brightman doing this character and thats the best they can do for the song he gets? like they couldve easily had him improv something halfway decent & it probably wouldve been infinitely funnier/more entertaining than what we actually got. at least then him & blitzo escaping bc of plot convenience wouldve been tolerable

also why did literally every fucking character make an appearance in this episode. striker AND moxies dad idfk what his name is AND stolas didnt need to be here. literally not even a single girl character in this episode except for like that secretary or whatever. but also if the people moxies dad hires are incompetent dumbasses (as weve seen in the 2 episodes theyre in) then why was he like so intent on testing strikers abilities instead of just hiring him cuz hes like tall and has nice eyebrows or whatever. anyways have a nice day or smth

He most likely will have another song in the next episode since it's a musical with Mammon or something, but yeah, that song was not good as a song and how it fits within the story.

Having Alex improv would fit Fizzarolli's character because he's an entertainer, and it would make a bit more sense as to how the villains got distracted because he would be interacting with them instead of just singing to them.

Crimson and Striker collabed because fanservice, that's really the only reason I believe why. It's weird that Striker has heard of Crimson, but Asmodeus hasn't.

And I don't know why Crimson wants to test out Striker's abilities. None of the goons he has are really smart and is pretty sure he looks for brawn instead of brains.

But I'm not sure if enough brains will even help the stupidity of him and his organization.

Hope you have a good one too ❤️

#helluva boss #vivziepop critical #helluva boss critical #helluva boss criticism #vivziepop criticism #vivziepop #helluva boss critique #helluva critical #vivienne medrano

42 notes · View notes

yearningandpatheticaboutit · 13 days

Text

SPEAK FOR YOURSELF

CHAPTER 16: WOOYOUNG

wc: 5242

warnings: mention of death, violence, drugs etc, SMUT

prev chapter

***

san

i remembered that wooyoung was afraid. he was scared of what would happen if miss A ever found out he shot mingi and deliberately antagonized a hotshot black dragon. looking back, i thought the black dragons would be anatagonized anyway because we caused shit in their side of town to get yunho back, it shouldnt be this big of a deal.

so why are so many bad things happening?

i didnt go to school today. i emailed all my teachers a forged sick note, claiming i couldnt leave the house because i went to the doctor and got diagnosed with sinisitic dizzy spells. most of my teachers are really helpful and good people, so they sent me the work they did for the day so i wouldnt miss out.

being a 'delight to have in class' aka a quiet smart kid who wasnt a pain in the ass had its perks sometimes. regardless, i used my morning to get all my money ready, of which i had just over enough to go to miss A to get her off my back.

when i get there, the place is crawling with old gangsters. miss A is screaming at people and when she sees me she's shocked, as if surprised i actually had guts to show my face. shes propped behind a round steel table in her garage, leaning back in her chair and the room goes silent as her eyes are on me.

"look who it is," she says to me, dipping her cigarette in her ashtray. "Lucky, you better have good news for me."

i bow to her and put the potato sack of money on the table. unfortunately i didnt have anything really fancy like a briefcase. im a fucking gangster on a budget.

she glares at me. "potatoes? is this some kind of joke?"

three guys restrain me out of nowhere, holding a knife under my throat. my breath gets stuck in my throat and i only manage to force out one thing. "m-money."

she doesnt tell them to let me go, which pisses me off. what the hell did i do to make her this mad? she lifts the opening of the sack and only when she sees the cash does she wave the gangsters to get off of me.

they drop me so hard i fall with my butt on the floor and i make no real move to get up in case they jump me again. instead i get to kneeling. "miss A, that's the money from all the dealings."

"i can see that. oh wow, you actually decided to be useful," miss A says, getting up and coming up to me. she puts her hand down on my hair and gently scratches it like you would a dog and i struggle to not show any fear. "if only wooyoung could be like you."

her words make me sweat. "where is wooyoung, miss A?"

i swear, if she laid a hand on him. i dont know what i would do, but no one here, including me, would be left alive.

her eyes darken. "i was actually hoping you would tell me, Lucky. your brother has become a magician. a cold case."

she doesnt know? did wooyoung actually skip town?

"i told him to bring me the hand of who killed my boys or else i would have his. he hasnt been back in days."

fuck. this is bad. im actually starting to get dizzy.

someone rolls into the garage, and my face drops in horror at the man and his disfigured, burnt face. hes in a wheelchair, an armbrace and has a bandage wrapped over everything but his mouth and eyes.

"you and your buddy got changbin and a lot of good boys killed. look what they did to seonghwa." miss A says.

that's fucking seonghwa? he looks fucked. hes never recovering. he wouldve been better off dead. now he really looks like something out of a horror movie, a real, terrifying disfigured butcher.

"that hongjong motherfucker," miss A laughs but there's nothing joyful in it. "he came into MY warehouse, burnt MY cargo, killed MY men. and all because he was looking for you two."

im struggling to breathe. i dont show it but im silently breaking down. i cant take my eyes off seonghwa. thats it? thats my future? i might as well kill myself. seonghwa killed yunho, he was one of the topdogs in the gang. im fucking nothing. if thats what that hongjoong guy could do to him then its over for me.

"he said that?" is all i can get out. miss A lifts my chin and forces me to look at her.

"you're not a boy anymore, Lucky. you'll always be a baby in my eyes, but its time for you to get serious, dont you think?" she tells me. "wooyoung is gone. so someone has to fix this. you know the rules, you make a mess, and you clean it up."

"miss A-" i start stammering. i feel like im going to cry. "we didnt do anything. we never even met that hongjoong guy. wooyoung shot mingi because he tried to kill him. it was in self defence."

"did i ask for an account of what happened?" miss A's voice drips with sarcasm. "i dont care who did what. but my boys paid the price. i wont let an attack on my turf go unpunished. you find wooyoung and you two will go and kill that fucker or i'll have you swimming in a fishtank with the rest of yunho. am i clear?"

fuck no. fuck my life is over. i just started having sex and now i have to die. this is a fucking nightmare.

"yes, ma'am," i nod my head. "when do you want this done?"

"before my boys suffer another attack. he wants you, so let him come."

"you won't find him," seonghwa says and he sounds like a lays packet trying to talk. his voice is raspy and sounds terrible. "he only shows when he wants to be found. and he wanted to be found that day. so make him come to you."

i dont want him anywhere near me! i want to scream. look at what the fuck he did to you.

i have to run away. i have to do it tonight. i have to take everything. i cant think clearly, my brain is beating so hard i can feel it in my ears.

i nod and get up and miss A distractedly starts counting the money. "so you got the money fast. i always knew you could do it, you were just lazy before, yeah?"

i had help, i want to say. yaera's stealing, her savings, wooyoung stealing all mingi's gambling winnings, fucking jongho. i couldnt have done this on my own. i would have been dead by the end of this month.

i did all that, just to stay alive. only to have another target on my head. this...it never fucking ends. its only going to get worse. i cant win. this game, its unbeatable.

i almost want to laugh out of pure irony. and yaera wanted me to ask miss A for a fixed amount. she wanted to help me pay off my dads bullshit debt. im never going to be free.

my hopes and dreams are gone.

"you still have your dad's gun right?" miss A asks me. i say yes in the smallest voice.

she smiles. "you better get to using it then, Lucky."

i leave miss A's garage with nothing left in the tank. nothing but another assignment. an assignment that will kill me.

im the sacrificial fucking lamb. why is she doing this to me? because she thinks i can do it? because she wants to get rid of me? i did what she asked of me. i got her yunho. i got her the drug money. now she wants me to kill an assassin? an assassin that already has a bodycount of seven?

and hes brutal. four of those were other gangsters, luckily none of those were ours at the time, but he guts every one of his enemies. he was connected to a murder of a prostitute. and cut out the stomachs and sliced off the hands of two guys who apparently looked at his sister.

what the FUCK am i getting into.

i get home and i dont know what to do. everything comes crashing down on me. i throw my fist into the picture frames on the wall, sending glass bursting everywhere. i look at the picture of my parents, feeling nothing but burning hatred. i hate them both. i hate my mother for leaving me behind in this shit life and i fucking hate that bullshit excuse of a sperm donor for killing me.

he killed me. he signed my death sentence.

i start tearing everything apart. im ripping my apartment to shreds because nothing matters. this is all useless, nothing, i wouldnt fucking miss this place. i have nothing but awful memories here. but my anger doesnt last. it comes crashing down so fast that im left to collapse next to my bed and i cant stop myself from crying.

its over for me. everything is.

i had nothing to begin with. nothing except...

without even thinking, my bleeding hand reaches for my phone on my desk and calls her. she picks up on the first ring.

"san?" her voice is comforting and i dont know why. i dont fucking know this girl. she doesnt know me. but shes all i have. and i dont even reall have her. "are you okay? you never call me."

i cant even speak, im heaving into the microphone and sniffling uncontrollably.

"san?" she sounds more concerned. oh shes concerned for me. thats nice. i'll remember how nice it feels when i die.

"c-can you come over, please?"

i dont even recognize my voice. its cracking and its like the pained whimper of an animal. she puts off the phone and i wrap myself around my bedsheets, curling into a pathetic ball.

shes here within 15 minutes. i dont know how she got here so fast. she was supposed to be at school. it was still one period before lunch. she must have been skipping. i wish i skipped more class now that i know im not going to live very long. studying all that shit was pointless. i should have been living like her. like i dont have a care in the world. but i cant. and i never could.

she walks into my apartment with her eyes wide, dropping her blazer off her shoulders and onto my dirty floor. "what the hell happened? are you okay?" she runs and puts herself infront of me.

"did someone break in?" she holds my wet face. i never stopped crying. not once. she looks horrified seeing me this way. i cant imagine how bad i must look. "oh my god."

she hugs me. she hugs me and i grip her so tightly till i feel my lungs tighten. the tears are pouring harder now. im staining her white blouse.

"im going to die," i choke out. "they're going to kill me."

"what?" she gasps. "who?"

i try to speak but i dont stop crying. this is fucking awful. she shushes me and lets me continue, rubbing my hair in the softest way that makes me hope i wont die, just so that i'd experience it more than once.

"im here, dont worry."

of course you are. you're always here. always invading my apartment. always working on my nerves. always in my head since i fucking met you. i wish i didnt take that for granted for as long as i did. if i knew this was all i'd have left.

i dont know what possesses me. i pull away from her, my hands drift up to the buttons of her blouse. im careful so she knows i wont hurt her the way he did. she watches my bleeding knuckles, looking at me with tender eyes. she doesnt stop me. i flick open the first button as she stands above me.

"can i?" i choke out. "this is all i have."

she starts removing her own buttons. "you dont even have to ask," she tells me.

she trusts me so much. if this is all i have left then i dont want to destroy it.

she drops her blouse, revealing her bronze, skin bare skin and black bra. the sun in my blinds isnt doing her justice. i reach behind her and unclip her bra and her boobs spill out right in my face. her skin is warm. shes so warm. she lifts my ugly brown hoodie off my body, trailing her hand down my stomach.

her touch feels like satin. i dont deserve it. she doesnt deserve this.

"i-i dont want to use you as a coping mechanism," i tell her but im talking to a wall. i dont want to but i am. im going to die and all i want to do is fuck her one last time. there isnt enough time in the world.

she kisses me sorely, with way too much emotion for what we really are. two broken, fragile people. we have no business with each other, but she kisses me like i mean something.

"for you, san, i'd let you use me however you want," she whispers against my lips. "as long as its you."

i feel my heart pain. i want to cry again but my dick is hard and i can only focus on two things at once. so i deal with my boner first.

i slide down her thin, pink underwear from under her skirt and it drops to her ankles. she steps out of it and pulls my sweatpants out from under me, immediately sliding herself onto my dick.

she moans softly into my ear and it feels like heaven. shes like heaven wrapped in one complicated woman. she could destroy me. she could ask to end me and i would let her.

i'd rather it be you than anyone else.

i grip her softly and my hands are stinging but i dont care. i feel weak. but somehow with her here, it doesnt hurt as much. shes riding me slowly, its crazy how without any foreplay shes already drenched down there. i guess she does like me a little.

she peppers kisses all over my neck as i hold her up, losing my mind as she slowly sinks and rises onto me. i never fucking liked our stupid school uniform but seeing it on her like this, with her on me, just makes me lose my mind. jongho doesnt fucking know what he missed out on.

"you know i care about you right?" she whispers into my ear. "its about more than just the money. you know that right?"

my lips her are on her chest and i kiss her there slowly. "i know," i mutter. actually i didnt know that. i dont know what the fuck she sees in a dickhead like me.

"good," she says, then pushes me down to my back. she adjusts herself to straddle me properly but i cant watch her struggle to please me. i get back up and flip her under me, pushing her back down gently when she tries to protest.

"but-"

"i want you to feel the way you make me feel," i say. and i never thought i'd ever utter words like that. fuck, no wonder everyone thought i was gay.

i drag my lips down her perfect, sculpted torso and plant them onto her shivering, wet hole. she whimpers weakly as i stick my tongue inside, slowly impaling her with it. i dont care that im taking my time honestly. im going to die, so i might as well make this as long as it can.

i drink up her bitter juices, lapping my tongue across her slit. the moans she lets out are otherworldly, definetely worthy of a noise complaint. i dont mind it. i feel useful for once in my life. i slowly inch a finger into her warm hole, sucking on her pleasure button while im at it. i'd call it her clit, but thats too rough for me.

"san please," she begs. "i want you so bad, just fuck me already."

i stop at her request, getting up and over her. i line myself at her entrance, pushing in slowly. she throws her arms around my neck and the eye contact we have as i just lay there inside her is enough to make me drop it all. i'd drop it all and leave with her, wherever she wanted to go.

her hole feels like home. my dick fits perfectly inside her. its warm and hugs me and i cant get enough of it. i push in and out slowly, taking in her eyes. they havent left mine. her lips are parted in bliss, and i decide to kiss them. she moans into my mouth, and it feels like a fucking spell being casted on me. i accelerate the pace, and the lewd sounds of her squelching and our breaths syncing up are all that can be heard.

it turns around so fast. im fucking into her at a pace thats desperate. like if i fuck her any slower, its going to get taken away from me. everything will. her legs are wrapped around my waist and she clenches on me, as if she doesnt want me to ever leave. i dig my fingers into her skin, holding onto dear life as i feel myself getting closer.

"wait," she breathes. "i wanna do it standing up."

i pause mid stroke. "how?"

"against the wall. lift me."

i go along with it. we get up and she lays with her back against the wall, lifting her leg so i can put it in. i pick her up and she slides onto me perfectly, and this new angle makes my brain go foggy. its so much deeper and tighter, i can feel her soak onto me.

i start ramming into her against the wall and her hair is hanging down her face, making her look like a sexier version of the grudge. she looks utterly lost in it all, and its so enjoyable to watch. i feel like im doing something right seeing her looked so absolutely fucked out.

my legs grow weaker as i hit her walls, feeling myself getting closer to the edge. shes demanding, with her legs wrapped around me she wont stop till ive been emptied.

"you're so fucking perfect," she whisper-whines, and its enough for me to blow. i completely blow inside her and she creams on me at the same time, our juices mixed together like some fucked up smoothie.

i drop her and she doesnt remove her arms from my neck. instead she pulls my body towards her, till we're chest to chest, completely naked amd kisses me harder than she ever has before.

this isnt even because we're fucking. she just wants to do it. and honestly, i needed it so badly.

when she pulls away im left yearning for more. it makes me sick. "thank you," i tell her. "i needed this."

"i know," she says softly. "tell me everything."

***

after i tell yaera everything, we're sitting on the bed beside each other, a painful, weighing silence between us.

"what are you going to do?" she asks, sounding hopeless.

"i have to kill the guy. or miss A's going to kill me."

"the police?" she says but knows immediately it wont work.

"i'd die before miss A sees trial," i laugh emptily. "and i'd go to jail for sure. she has enough on me to make sure i'm wanted."

she's frowning. she's realizing money cant buy my freedom. or my life.

"after you kill that gangster...nothing will be the same," she says. "you'd have blood on your own hands."

i shrug and stare out of my window. "it ends here, yaera. for both of us."

she stands up abruptly and looks like she wants to break into sobs. "no you can't disappear after this. i still need you."

i smile weakly. hearing that makes me feel better. someone will miss me.

"when i'm gone, you can have my apartment. i have some money left over here, maybe you'll be able to get away for good. you'll never deal with that freak again."

she's not happy with my answer. "no, san. i dont want you to go. i dont want you to disappear. cant we catch a one way flight? can't we run? i'll run with you. i promise."

she actually wants to stay with me. when i dont answer yaera bends down infront of me, holding my hands. i cant believe how quickly things turned around. i have so much to lose.

"when you finish your business, we're getting the fuck out of here, okay? promise me. i'll get the tickets, i'll get everything ready. but promise me you'll come back to me."

i cant promise that i'll be alive. i want to, but i dont want to lie to her.

"i cant promise i'll make it back, yaera," i mutter. a tear rolls down her face. "and even if we run away, is this really sustaintable?"

"is what?"

"us?"

she scoffs. "i dont think now is the time to think of what we are. i dont care about defining this relationship, thats not important. all i know is, you're all i have."

"you're all i have too." i whisper.

"thats enough for me. so promise?"

"okay, i promise."

"good, now lets clean up here and pick a place on the map."

yaera and i spend the rest of the afternoon cleaning up my shattered apartment. i take my parents pictures and throw it in the spare room where i dont have to see it. when we're done, yaera makes herself at home and lays down in my bed watching youtube. i get dressed and she switches off her phone when she notices.

"where are you going?"

"remember those gangsters you met the night you followed me? im paying them a visit." i tell her.

"your dad's old gang...are you going to ask them to help you?"

"yeah. i wanna see if they've heard from wooyoung. get help where i can."

"okay. is it cool if i stay over?" she asks. "i dont feel like going home."

she doesnt even have to ask anymore. i say my goodbyes and make my way downtown.

getting into mao's place has always been shady, im surprised there are guys outside the door. they see me and are shocked to see me, letting me in and muttering shit in cantonese under their breaths.

i find mao sitting around a table and gambling and by god, i find wooyoung too.

he freezes when i see him and i have half the mind to beat the shit out of him. this is where hes been the whole fucking time?!

"sannie!" mao yelps with his cigarette dangling off his lips. "look we're finally good enough for him again! i heard you've been visiting everyone BUT me!"

i run across the room and catch wooyoung before he can run. then i pick him up and toss him into the closest wall. "you DICKHEAD!" i scream.

mao's men jump up from their seats and get between us. "woah woah woah!" mao shouts. "no fucking fighting under my roof! take that shit to the alley!"

"what the fuck man?!" wooyoung huffs. "arent you glad im alive?"

"you couldnt pick up a phone? you couldnt call me to let me know?" i snap. "i thought you fucking skipped town!"

"i had to toss my phone!" wooyoung stresses. "miss A is looking for me."

"i KNOW! I KNOW SHES LOOKING FOR YOU BECAUSE ITS BECOME MY PROBLEM, WOO!"

i start laughing hysterically. "we're fucked. we're both fucked because of you and i hope you know that."

wooyoung stands up, dusting himself off. he has a remorseful look on his face. fucking say something coward.

"i tried to keep you out of it," he admits shamefully. "i was gonna get it done."

"you were gonna kill hongjoong by yourself?" i scoff. "you'd be done for before you even do anything!"

"mao gave me a gun," woo says. i look to mao and he shrugs.

"you know about this?" i ask him.

"as long as he doesnt involve me, i dont mind helping out," mao says. "i dont want black dragons on this side of the world, but bae su ji is losing her touch."

"who the fuck is bae suji?" both woo and i ask angrily.

"Miss A."

"you know Miss A's government name?" woo questions. mao shrugs.

"we used to date in high school."

we're getting off track. im still fucking angry, i turn to wooyoung.

"so? let me hear this fucking plan of yours."

"i dont want you involved san. we cant both be dead."

it feels like my veins are going to pop. "she's going to KILL ME if i dont fucking do something about that hongjoogn fucker. he put seonghwa in a wheelchair and killed changbin. shes going to kill me if i dont get involved, woo, so just tell me the fucking plan."

"hongjoong's sister is getting married soon," mao interjects. "woo's gonna wipe him out there."

"and then im going to skip town for real," woo says with a dark look. "mao's arranged for me to go to hong kong. im gonna work for him there."

"you know who was also supposed to go to hongkong?" i laugh darkly. "yunho."

the room falls into uncomfortable silence aside from the sound of dominoes hitting the table.

"i'll be there, woo." i tell him. "im leaving town too."

"where are you going?" both mao and woo asks.

"im leaving with yaera," i answer woo only. mao is confused and wooyoung tells him its my girlfriend.

"you left Flor?" mao is shocked. i sigh remembering that yaera gave mao a fake name when she followed me. i dont dignify him with an answer.

"alright man," woo sounds defeated. "now you know. i didnt wanna keep in touch because i didnt want to make things worse."

"they're already bad, woo. you not telling me changed nothing."

ive calmed down significantly. i feel defeated but at least i know this bastard is alive.

"what about mingi?" i question. "he started this shit in the first place."

"im taking them both out," wooyoung says. "mingi's the groom. hongjoong's walking his sister down the aisle."

how convenient. two birds with one stone. now, how were we going to get out of it alive?

"WE, wooyoung," i correct him. "WE'RE taking them both out."

***

yaera

after i helped san clean up his rampage, i saw something interesting in his spare room.

i stare at the daewoo k5 in my hands, i never realized san was the kind to keep guns. with the way he lives, i guess i shouldnt be surprised. he needs it more than anything.

something dangerous popped into my mind when looking at it. the first thing i thought of was wiping santo off this earth.

wouldnt i be doing a good deed? taking that rapist, pedophile and fucking freak off this planet?

he called me again. from a different number. i never pick up unknown IDs because of him. but i picked up this time, and all i heard was him breathing harshly.

"i dont like being ignored, yaera. it hurts my heart. you dont want to know how i act when im hurt."

i wonder if yasmine found out, and thats how she ended up where she did.

i know he wasnt anywhere near her when she died, but the thought that he touched her the way he touched me...the fact that she enjoyed it. it was driving me insane. i feel myself losing it with every single thought that flashes by me.

i just want to leave. i want san to finish up his business, come out alive and free me from this place.

we decided on soroa, cuba. europe wouldnt be a good place for us to start over in. latin america would be fresh. its going to be better.

i tried to keep busy but my stomach ached for san. with every apartment i looked at, every beach and every municipality i imagined living in, i had a thought of san never seeing it. i feel so fucking helpless.

i cant fix any of this. i never could but ive never felt this cornered before now. if anything happens to him, i know im going to end up in a ward. i cant leave this place without him when he helped me get to this point.

my parents have left me so many missed calls. so have irina and claire. none from anya? thats weird. she always leaves me the most calls.

i decide to call irina back. i havent heard from them aside from drug related business so it'd be nice if she could take my mind off the fuckery thats been taking place. they always have the most interesting things to tell me. vacationing in saint tropez, partying in monaco, i'd love them to tell me about cuba.

irina picks up first ring. "hey girl–"

"you fucking bitch," she snares at me. i jolt up from the bed at her tone.

"hello?" i repeat in confusion.

"anya is DEAD BECAUSE OF YOU!"

fire creeps up on my skin. it feels like all my hairs raising.

"w-what?"

"she fucking mixed whatever pill you gave her and she threw up all over herself. we fucking rushed her to hospital and she didnt make it!"

this has to be why my parents called me. oh my god. oh my god anya's dead.

"i dont know what you mean," is the first thing i say. probably not the best thing but its the first thing i could get out. there has to be people around her right now. i cant risk it.

"now you dont know what im talking about?" irina snaps. "you fucking killed her."

"anya has a history of drug abuse, irina. why are you blaming me for this? im sorry for what happened but dont call me with this bullshit ever again."

i quickly put off the phone and start hyperventilating. fuck this is a mess, my parents probably found out. they probably know. if i go home im screwed. i cant go home, they'll keep me there.

how do i stay out of this. i know i cant go to jail, none of them have any proof that i dealt them drugs. not a single shred of evidence. there are the cellphone records, but those calls cant get traced back to me. the phone's too old. i need to stay away from them.

i have to fix this, somehow. i cant unload it on san he has enough on his plate. but it sounds like ive made an enemy out of the closest thing i have to friends. i dont know what to do.

i look at the gun on my lap. i have to finish the story.

***

next chapter

tagslist: @sansonlygf @brown88 @yujispinkhair @mountiiny

#ateez angst #ateez imagines #choi san angst #ateez fanfic #ateez fic #ateez crime au #ateez gang au #ateez smut #choi jongho #choi san #park seonghwa #song mingi #choi san fluff #choi san smut #ateez x reader #ateez ot8

11 notes · View notes

fyodorloveclub · 2 months

Note

not to be hateful with this purely a suggestion please hear me out.

I think instead of completely ignoring the allegations made before you came back to this blog and deleting them all to act like it never happened, you should make one big post addressing it all, just to add as a link to your pinned post if you know what I mean.

i know the whole drama wasn't your fault, and I'm whole heartedly on your side, but there'll be people who'll insist because you deleted the posts on your blog about it that you're ignoring the issues and claims made towards your name.

of course this is just a suggestion, but with claims strong and harmful as such as the ones made I think it'd be smart to do so, especially with how people are on here. because pretending it never happened would probably cause some uproar .

english is not my first language. I'm sorry for any wrong words.

thanks !

i guess i’ll use this as a jumping off point then? me deleting the posts was never to pretend nothing happened. frankly nothing i could do will ever make it seem like nothing happened. i just really didnt want people coming back to check on my blog once i returned and being hit with all that nastiness, and i don’t want it on my blog. and to be honest i don’t really think that’s anyone’s business

and honestly i think a lot of this is no one’s business 😭 i don’t think i owe anyone anything because this is supposed to be a comfortable safe fun space for me and having to constantly defend myself completely defeats that purpose and the thought of that makes me just want to nuke this blog entirely

that being said, i guess i’ll say it once and NEVER again. i was not on that twitter, i did not use that twitter. i followed him when he made it bc he was my friend, and never checked it again. i deleted it when i did bc when we started getting the nasty anons and i found out what was there, i knew i was fuckin doomed bc that connection was already made, despite me having nothing to do with it. so i deleted it in a frenzy. also if i was a part of it do you guys genuinely think my twt wouldve been “floratumblr” and my blog wouldve been linked in the bio. do you really think that. like use ur head why would i have done that

i wholeheartedly and vehemently condemn underage content. i condemn shotacon and lolicon and any other fuckin nonsense bullshit that has anything to do with underage. i don’t know how to make that any clearer.

he and i are no longer friends.

and frankly anything else is no one’s business! that is all thank you!

#THIS IS NOT INVITING A CONVERSATION. NO MORE ASKS REGARDING THIS WILL BE ANSWERED #im not a huge fan of this ask honestly but i think at least something needs to be said #and that’s all nothin else will be said ever ever again #this is my blog and supposed to be my safe place #so. that’s all #i will not be linking this in my pinned that is a little bit bonkers #and to demand that of me is pretty disrespectful #i do not owe anyone anything #im just rambling now but i didnt want to have to talk about this so #voices in my head

11 notes · View notes

the-owl-house-takes · 7 months

Note

ngl i rly love the idea of both philip AND caleb being evil assholes

imagine if caleb wanted to wipe out humanity bc his view of them had become so warped after growing up in a town full of witch hunters, so he had this twisted desire to protect witchkind by killing all humans (sound familiar?)

i also like to think caleb initially kept up his "whoa calm down bro" facade during the knife fight but then eventually dropped it and told philip "i shouldve killed you before i left" and went absolutely apeshit on him

(i dont think philip wouldve ever known abt calebs hatred of humanity tho bc imo caleb wouldve been smart enough to not tell him. so philip attacking caleb was still rooted solely on his anti-witch bigotry and does NOT make him a "hero" whatsoever lol)

ik (iirc) dana said evelyn chose caleb bc he seemed to be the nicest person in gravesfield but 1. caleb wouldve been hiding his hatred of humanity for obvious reasons and 2. we dont know shit abt evelyn herself, for all we know her standards couldve been "someone who wouldnt kill a witch on sight"

(speaking of evelyn i personally dont think she was evil in any way. i hc her as more of a batshit chaotic neutral character who did whatever she wanted as long as its fun anyways)

in this case caleb would be interesting foils to philip (anti-human vs anti-witch), hunter (who has an affinity to the human realm and is close to some humans like luz and camila) and the clawthorne sisters (both eda and lilith are flawed but still ultimately good ppl. both the clawthornes and the wittebanes subvert the "good sibling evil sibling" trope this way)

idk exactly what caleb and flapjacks relationship wouldve been like tho they had to have been close to some degree right? but at the same time i think flapjack had always disagreed with calebs anti-human sentiments but was afraid to actively oppose him, and ofc flap was happy that hunter was able to befriend a human and enjoy the human realm

speaking of hunter i. i was gonna say "imagine if hunter found out abt caleb wanting to wipe out humanity lol so angsty" but tbh i think that would just be TOO traumatic to him (even for an angst enjoyer like me) like he straight up wont be able to recover from that imo. or at least take a REALLY long time to recover but either way i dont think he should learn abt that kinda stuff. i do think it would be interesting if luz, eda and lilith found out tho

i also originally had the hc that caleb built the cat eye portal with the purpose of ambushing gravesfield once he was ready, but after the papa titan eye reveal in wad im not even sure who built that portal anymore- well either way caleb still wouldve wanted to build A portal ig (not the other one that led to the clawthorne house, i think that was probably evelyns)

also. the irony of both caleb and philip dying as smth that theyve hated (caleb died as a human and philip died as a "witch/demon", not literally the species in philips case but more luzs definition of "powerful magic user", and we can all agree that monster philip is demonic). i do think caleb was trying to find ways to turn himself into a real witch but philip killed him before he could succeed

uhh idk how to end this long ass post lmao- actually yk what im just gonna go ahead and say ik this will probably never be canon even if we get more official toh content in the future, its just a fun idea/hc i rly like!!! i have so much more to say abt this hc but imma stop here for now bc i dont want this ask to be TOO long lol

#the owl house #toh #caleb wittebane #philip wittebane #emperor belos #hunter noceda #long post

20 notes · View notes

chichariann · 3 months

Text

It's weird to read people's post about how they hate this episode cuz

The lack of a zebra

Already knowing what the lotus casino is a trap

Grover being the only one who got trapped

The gang being "too smart"

Luke's mom's expositioh

Lack of action

The deadline passing

4 pearls

Episode is mostly dialogue

Idk. Honestly but heres what I thought as the episode went on...

Very long post. Read the red text if u just want points

Okay, they suspect the wrong person to be the thief (typical detective trope - still fits)

Cute grover and percabeth banter

They already know about the lotus flowers. Makes sense as there are 3 greek myth knowledgeable kids there. At least on of them should know.

They split up. Bad idea

The pair are being cautious

Grover is gone now

Percy and annabeth are searching for hermes so makes sense they'd be at the casino area. I dont see how they could be trapped—nop they already were the moment they stepped in

May Castellan exposition. Okay, revealing the premise of being a seer but not telling us what happened to her as a result is good. Without context from the books, we now know that something's happened to his mom and we do not know except for Luke blaming Hermes for it

Hermes parenting talk - this happens in Sea of Monsters but its nice to at least see a contrast of how he's gonna feel pre-betrayal vs post-betrayal.

Poseidon was the one who warned hermes about trying to be close to luke. Contrasting Poseidon, now, wanting to meet Percy

They past the deadline - what does this mean???

They almost forgot Grover but eventually finding him

Grover started this episode saying that his friends would never understand his personal quest to one day save the natural world, and here he is now, memories wiped except for what he wants to do with his life. And percy understands and is hopeful for him

Hermes taxi scene was hilarious

Percabeth moment

Teleport to Santa Monica

Percy meets the Nereid who tells him that theyd passed the deadline

Percy still wants to finish the quest 1) to save his mom 2) get the bolt 3) stop a war

4 PEARLS???

What I'm taking from this:

There were A LOT of changes to how this scene played out in the books. I like that the kids are smart. I like that Grover got to tell Percy about his personal quest even if it was just a glimpse of it.

Should there have been a Zebra? MAYBE. I wouldve loved to see Percy talk to em but its not exactly plot relevant. Do I wish they had gotten trapped by just playing games? Yeah, but then how would they get to talk to Hermes. They would've just forgotten why they were there in the first place. Do I wish there was more action? No, not really. Do I wish the kids had flaws? THEY ALREADY DO. Grover got trapped by his own desires and personal goal over the quest he was on. Percy and Annabeth may not have shown their flaws this episode but... They already had in the past episodes. Maybe they shouldve but Im not mad that they're just... There.

I actually love that they're past the deadline and Percy has 4 pearls. Cuz it makes us wonder what would happen next. I think as book fans, we pride ourselves of knowing what happens next. Immune to any surprise. But when we do, there are 2 reactions: 1) intrigue and worry and unfortunately common, 2) despising the changes. I fall under number 1. I like that I dont know what could happen next. I know how it SHOULD go but I like that Rick is still surprising us despite knowing what could happen.

I like that we get Hermes parenting moments in this episode. Because instead of learning a sliver of why Luke betrays Percy at the end of the season at the last episode, we get a bit of exposition into his early life.

Annabeth says not to talk to Luke about his dad

Something happened to his mom and Luke hates Hermes for it

Hermes is keeping his distance because he knows that whatever he does, he's gonna end up hurting Luke

All of this sets up what will happen not just later in the books, but LATER IN THE SERIES. Rick wrote The Lightning Thief without any concrete idea of how the later books will play out. NOW HE DOES. So it makes sense to give us a way to understand Luke. To know why he makes the final decision in the book.

I would have found it weird if the gang went on the quest, got back to camp, got a sliver of Luke's opinion of the gods, then betrayal. NONE OF US WOULD UNDERSTAND. We get that he hates the gods but we won't know why. Now we do. By giving us all this material to work with, it gives its viewers the opportunity to really think, if you were in his shoes, would you have done it too? Would you be like Ethan or Chris, and joined him in that rebellion? I definitely could.

Because I for one would know that when I first read the books then reread it after, I would never even think about joining him given the context of the first book. We really only understand why he betrays the gods at like... The 5th book. When we finally get his backstory. Throughout the series, it has just been Percy hating Luke and being annoyed that Annabeth was so forgiving of him. Then on the last book, we finally get the backstory. Because, when you write in first person perspective, you cant give backstory IF the narrator is not talking to the character or is at the place where it happens. Throughout the whole series, Percy never thinks about what pushed Luke to make his decisions until, Nico had to bring Percy to where it all started. IN THE LAST BOOK. IN THE 5TH SEASON. THATS WHEN WE FINALLY GET TO UNDERSTAND WHAT MAKES LUKE CLICK.

It brings Luke out of the characterization of being someone who hates the gods and wants to overthrow them cuz they dont care about his kids. To someone who was abandoned and ignored by his father. To someone who is a victim to the gods' rules and their world (his mom). I kinda understand why he is the one leading the war here. Its cuz he's experienced one of the worst things that could happen to a demigod. Losing his mom. Getting ignored by his dad. Undervalued by the gods.

THIS ENTIRE SEASON HAS JUST BEEN SET UP FOR LUKE'S STORY. BECAUSE WE ALL KNOW... THAT IN THE LAST BOOK, RACHEL TELLS PERCY THAT HE IS NOT THE HERO OF THIS STORY. HE IS NOT THE ONE TO STOP THE WAR. LUKE IS THE HERO AT THE END OF THE SERIES. AND IT WOULD'VE BEEN WEIRD IF WE NEVER GET TO UNDERSTAND WHY UNTIL.... THE LAST BOOK.

#percy jackson episode 6 #percy series #percy jackson spoilers #lotus casino #luke's character has always been interesting to me and I hate that i only only got interested after reading the last book #i understand that there are flaws in this series cuz like... when will there ever be a flawless series #if u want a 1 to 1 adaption just read the books #one thing i do love about the writing in the series though is love how it sounds like rick's current writing #i feel like im reading trials of apollo or magnus chase or chalice of thr gods or the sun and the star #it understands that we know more now and rhe writing adapts to it

10 notes · View notes