#and so on and so forth. but these same ppl dont like that either lol

[transmaverique]

i wanna preface this by saying i dont really care if you use tme/tma. i think arguing abt the language and terminology we use is very dumb. i think the same abt transandrophobia discourse and i dont see why its not also true of tme/tma

the problem i have with them as terms within a trans/feminist framework is largely HOW people use them and not with the terms themselves. in a social sphere where 'privilege' is treated as a personal identifier, it makes total sense that some people would correlate Being a thing with being treated Like that thing. if you identify as a man, this means you are treated as a man, and thus have access to male privilege. myself, personally, i dont mind calling myself tme in specific discussions, bc i find that it's true that transmisogyny does not generally apply to me.

but the trans man who was mistaken for a trans woman and assaulted? the cis 24/7 drag queen whose existence became illegal in her state?

they are 'tme' and yet their lives remain touched and dictated by transmisogyny, both interpersonal and systemic. privilege is not something that is an aspect of how you IDENTIFY, it is how you are treated by the world at large based on others' perception of you. using tme/tma like they are interchangeable with non-transfem/transfem is a mistake and they more often hinder discussion on transphobia in my experience, where people who arent "affected" are told they are derailing when they add to the conversation

#ive seen ppl say that #like saying transmisogyny does not exclusively effect transfems is equal to saying 'it doesnt exist' #which is wild to me bc systemic oppression doesnt ask u what u id as before ruining ur life lmfai #all u have to do is Look At Real Life #the mental gymnastics some people do to make transandrophobia theorists out to be Problematique is so.. so annoying #if we Have to use the word transmisogyny to exclusively meam 'oppression of transfems' then we need words to mean 'oppression of transmascs #and so on and so forth. but these same ppl dont like that either lol #annoying.... #like i think its a good thing to have a word mean 'the oppression of transfems' like ............... just dont have double standards abt it #chattering

[hijackalx]

GORTASH NSFW ALPHABET

A = Aftercare (what they're like after sex)

hmm honestly feel like it depends on if hes feeling u or not. if he was just trying to catch a nut hes rude af. like before he leaves he'll throw a wet rag at u. and he used cold water to get it wet 🥲 BUTTTT if he really does like u i think he'll prolly run a bath for u both or something. i can see him washing ur hair/body for u 🥺

B = Body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner's)

his chest duhhh lol thats why he walks around with his titties out. i think hes got a really good upper body in general. like shoulders/arms/chest. and i feel like hes an ass man. yes that means all booties ALL. he likes to spank, bite, and leave marks all over it. omggg the type to smack or pinch ur ass in public LMAO

C = Cum (anything to do with cum, basically)

yall already know im a firm believer that this man cums bucketfuls. he'll have u sitting there like "damn why is it still going" LMFAO almost exclusively wants to cum inside. to the point to where its hard to convince him not to. he wants to breed u sooo bad 😭😭

D = Dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

*NONCON MENTION* it gets him concerningly hard when u tell him no but let him do it anyway. like i dont think he would ever AGGRESSIVELY force u to do anything hence the "let him", but something about being able to change ur mind/overpower u does something to him *NONCON MENTION OVER*

E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they're doing?)

well. i think hes an expert when it comes to pleasing himself (which is typically thru penetration, so for my AFABs if yall can finish vaginally just know he do be laying pipe 🤤) but he didnt really grow up caring about his sexual partners much lol. i do think he wants to please you though, like badly. thats the only reason hes willing to let u offer some guidance when it comes to giving oral/fingering u.

F = Favorite position (this goes without saying)

mating press yall. like when he hooks ur legs over his shoulders and basically folds u like a lawn chair lol. also likes doggy though so he can pull ur hair and leave welts on ur ass lol.

G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.)

hes wayyyy too intense to be goofy at any moment while u guys are fuckin LMAO. like this man loves sex and gives his ALL. he puts his mf game face on and locks IN baby 😹😹

H = Hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)

YESSSSSS !!!!! YES !!!!! this man is SO hairy EVERYWHERE !!!! the same texture as the hair on his head. im about to faint yall catch me

I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect)

uhh. i can see him being kind of romantic on special occasions. but like i said hes pretty intense usually and to me that doesnt leave much room for romance lol. especially since he can be so mean too

J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon)

yeah. like all the time. hes a hornball so if ur not around as an alternative he WILL be jizzing into his hand. omfg if yall are like, ever distanced from each other he will want to send nasty ass letters back and forth to keep him satisfied until u get back LMAO god forbid they ever end up at the wrong place

L = Location (favorite places to do the do)

his office. will fuck on every surface and up against every wall. everyone else is afraid to touch anything in there 😭

M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)

he likes when u seem weaker than him, either in the sense that he has a physical or mental advantage over u. dont let anyone else treat u like that tho or he'll think ur a pussy lol

N = No (something they wouldn't do, turn offs)

^^ as i mentioned letting other ppl have the same power over u as he does is a turn off. so if ur like me u got to grow a backbone or get the boot 🥾🤾‍♀️ 😭😭  anyway. i dont think he'll be willing to do anything that makes him feel "lesser" or more submissive. i mean u could probably trick him into doing it if u make him think its his idea or something LMAO

O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)

i genuinely think he eventually gains an affinity for giving ??? he likes the sounds u make and the way u pull his hair. so yeah, gives lots of kisses and will mutter a lot of praises while down there too. dont get me wrong though u better be giving back too 😹😹

P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)

rough as fuckkkk bro. doesnt ever like to be gentle. sex just brings out a lot of aggression in him. u will be sore and bruised after. if u convince him to chill out he'll be a pouty baby about it

Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)

anywhere and everywhere possible. i dont think its a goal of his to be seen by others while doing it but i also dont think he cares so that doesnt really stop him

R = Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.)

he'll try to get u to do all kinds of fucked up shit. including shit that is probably lowkey dangerous 😹😹 hes pretty sadistic so get ready gurl

S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?)

15-20 mins max shawty lmao sorry 😹😹 and since he wants to act like a wild ape ur prolly not getting a round 2 since he wore himself out. but if u didnt get off in time he'll use his hand to help u finish even if hes sleepy 😴

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)

will tease u at random times throughout the day by saying some absolutely horrendous shit in ur ear while ur in public and then acting like nothing happened. but usually doesnt want to waste much time before the act, so he might tease just enough to get u ready. nothing more though

V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)

heavy grunter and breather. will only moan occasionally if its really hitting right 😹😹 if u do get him to moan i can see it being decently loud. its like a reward

Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?)

very high libido man........ prepare ur hole 🪦

Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

sometimes he can stay awake long enough for aftercare but other times itll have to come after a power nap 😭 youll be like "bae how was it" and turn around to see him completely unconscious. snoring and everythang

#enver gortash #bg3 #baldurs gate 3 #baldurs gate #enver gortash x tav #enver gortash x reader #x reader #headcanons #my headcanons #bg3 gortash #lord enver gortash

[golbrocklovely]

Theres some photos of Stas and Colby floating around from Vegas on twitter that dont look like just friends, it looks like Colby in Japan pt2.. No word how they came about and i know you like her but this is just my take not looking for an argument or fight…

Its pretty obvious something is going on between Stas and Colby. I just find it fucked up and telling that while he was taking Tanya out on little dates and Abbey posted that pic of her with them, Tanya followed Stas and she never followed back. When Colby was all cuddly with Carrington on the live , Stas was super serious and only got talkative again once she left and she was next to Colby. She doesnt try to hide anything on her twitter either. Its not just on her though, who knows what Colby is doing but she definitely hasnt made it a secret shes liked him for a while even telling people what cologne he smelled like on tiktok and that he smelled like roses. She doesnt seem like a nice girl honestly, not just saying that because shes near him its the way she acts with other girls near him aside from Kat, and Abbey. She even unfollowed Amber and Tanya went and followed her and liked her photos and Stas is over here following Seth and Josh instead. I just hope it doesnt turn into a hes only allowed around this specific group of people like it did with Sam when he and Kat got super serious and she got jealous of other girls near him. Or one of these things where all we see is Sam and Colby + Kat and Stas in everything. I don’t follow the girl but once i saw this back and forth on twitter of her liking all this stuff when hes been super private it just annoyed me and reminded me of Shea and Spookybby all over again.

i saw the one video of him and her dancing together from that one guys story. but they weren't really grinding against each other, they were just kinda swaying together. again, like i said in another ask, i've danced dirtier with friends of mine so i don't think what they did was that weird lol

and like i said in another ask as well, i think it's always best as a fanbase to just understand we don't know colby's love life or what's happening in it. is it possible that him and stas have something going on? sure. i don't think so, but i can see why others do. and whatever he might have with another girl, again, we don't know. him and tanya might not be together. or they might have had something super casual, which is why she was also in vegas with a bunch of guys and chilled with them instead of colby. hell, maybe they aren't together anymore, or ended their casual thing. idk.

i'm not gonna pretend to understand colby and literally any choice he makes lol

idk if you are the same anon or if it's multiple anons that have told me this, but so many of you have weirdly noticed that stas doesn't follow back/unfollows girls more often than guys. personally, i don't think there is some deeper meaning to any of this. maybe she just doesn't vibe with girls the same way as she does with guys. maybe she's insecure and doesn't like seeing ppl with nice bodies on her insta feed. maybe it's something else. none of us know.

in the livestream, she definitely was still talking to ppl. i watched it back, and while yes she was more quiet than before, it could be bc she was on the phone with her mom. maybe it was also the fact that she was drunk as all hell. when i'm drunk, i go back and forth between being really talkative and then really quiet. but she definitely was still talking to ppl while him and carrington hugged and were close.

i scrolled thru her likes on twitter. while she did like some stuff that were about colby, they also included HER in the tweet too. so it wasn't just her liking tweets about colby. she's likes things that ppl send to her or @ her, and sometimes that includes tweets with her and colby. it's not like she's liking tweets that are ONLY about colby. if she has done that, she hasn't done it that recently.

also, her telling ppl on tiktok about colby's cologne and what he smells like isn't that strange. that boy has been asked that question how many times and still doesn't answer it? she did a solid for the fandom lol

i'm not trying to argue or fight you with this response, anon. if you genuinely don't like her, that's fine with me. personally, i don't see any of this as some deeper conspiracy that she's secretly with him or is overly possessive of him for no reason or is trying to send messages to the fandom that him and her are together or whatever. i just think they're friends and danced together and somehow that is getting blown out of proportion.

#ask #personal #stas #colby brock #cb ll

[kleefairy]

hello!! this is maybe not going to do anything to change your attitude on things but um hi! i’m a white/mixed native gal!! i’m actually from white earth, which is an ojibwe tribe in the midwest. and i wanted to say that i think it’s valid for you to say that “hey i’m indigenous” bc it’s true you are!!! but as we’re people who (in my case i have a fair complexion since my dad is white) don’t suffer from racism nearly to the same degree as indigenous people who take the brunt of it all, you should really be more wary when posting things that you’ve posted. we need to pose ourselves as allies, and not take away the fact that since we look different we aren’t affected in the same way as other indigenous individuals.i also think that you should maybe take a break from answering these asks and maybe turn off anon? personally as someone who’s nd as well i can get in these fits of going off the rails and not realizing, and it seems like maybe that’s the case here. either way you can respond to this like you’ve been doing with other asks (w sarcasm/cussing people out) but i think people would take you a bit more serious on these issues if you presented things differently when answering stuff /s

nobody said we experience the same level of racism. people assign your race based on how you look, so yes, most people will assume i am white at first glance, and i won't experience racism while i'm just going about my life. however, it is objectively racist to deny someone's actual ethnicity when they tell you what they are. white natives do not exist. you are mixed or white passing. you are indigenous until your "blood quotent" (which is its own brand of racist bs built on genocide but i rly dont wanna get into that lol i could write a whole essay on the subject) is low enough to remove you from the tribe. mine is high enough, thus i am mixed indigenous. i am, by definition, not 'white'. white natives are just not a thing. white passing, yes. but not white. i am not a white ally. i am a mixed race indigenous woman. that's a simple fact - the level of racism i experience doesn't come into play with that. if the census comes by, i am expected to check off native. the level of racism you experience doesn't change your ethnicity, yknow? it's just how you are.

in any case, i'm cherokee. just look at the tribal council - plenty of even them are light-skinned with blue eyes. this idea that if you have those traits you can't be indigenous purely comes from the racist idea that all indigenous americans have dark brown skin, black hair, and brown eyes, which simply isn't true. in fact, i'd say most don't have dark skin in the way a lot of ppl on tumblr seem to think they do, unless they are mixed with a parent who does. it might lean darker, but it's often going to be on the light to tan spectrum. especially since the vast majority of indigenous americans are heavily mixed with white people at this point. an olive undertone does not dark skin make. and blue eyes are recessive so if you have relatives on each side that have had blue eyes you can get the trait, genetics are far more complicated than they teach you in forth grade. those traits were solely brought up to deny me my ethnicity, which i will not tolerate. it all boils down to racism and colorism in the end, believing all people of a certain ethnicity look the same, which just... isn't a good look, regardless of what you're using it for. nevermind the majority of people throwing a fit were not indigenous americans so they doubly so don't get to decide who is indigenous and who isn't. people are allowed to be mad when people deny that they are what they are.

#i have not logged into this account in months oops #it's simply annoying how ppl are putting words i did not say into my mouth though lol #nonsims #emi.txt #asks

[fairycosmos]

im just wondering do you have any darknesses in you? meaning like parts of you that need to come out and be hateful or angry that scare you? i have such moral insecurities and anxieties i try to be kind but i just feel sometimes some monster in me so i try to let it out in private, but it seems like so many people like u are so certainly unfalteringly good and i cant understand how!!! i wanna be like that!!!! if you dont wanna answer or this is weird i totally understand lol

oh dude..........absolutely. dont make the mistake of thinking i’m like idk.....someone you should want to be like. i know i answer anons asking for advice sometimes, but that’s usually just me suggesting they seek professional support bc i can relate to them. i’m sure the ppl who follow me on here have a very one dimensional image of me as i do in regards to the people i follow, due to the nature of social media. but i can definitely vouch for the fact that i’m a fucked up person and i have a lot to work on, a whole lifetime of shit to work on. while it’s easy to be amicable with people online when they’re giving you that same positive energy, in real life i’m basically too insecure and bitter to be as open and vulnerable as i am on here.  i have internalized so much crap and it comes through in most of my interactions. i’m selfish, i have a million complexes, i’m insecure, i cringe away from everything, i’m emotionally unavailable at the best of times, i’m moody and neglectful. i’m a COMPLETE coward. sometimes i dont think about the shit that i say, i take things for granted. i freeze and avoid avoid avoid to the point of toxicity. i never know where to start or how to conduct myself naturally - to an embarrassing extent for someone who is a whole ass adult. and i’m angry, too. which is a human emotion not a flaw. but people tell me my resting face looks like i want to fkn kill somebody, i dont have a good aura :( there’s a lot of reasons i’m so isolated, i guess. besides all of that though, i also don’t think we as humans can be categorized as ‘entirely good’ or ‘entirely bad’ because most of us carry both inside, always. we’re complex beings made up of shades of grey, rather than of black and white. and the different environments we find ourselves in (usually due to factors outside of our control) tend to bring out different parts of who we are, negative or otherwise. everyone you pass on the street has that same ‘face’ they only wear when they’re alone. we see others in a very shallow way on a day to day basis, so it’s easy to think they’re not holding anything back, but they always are. nobody gets through the world unscathed and having insecurities, especially ones you’ve learned growing up, is completely normal.  the only thing you can do once you recognize that they’re there is try your best to dismantle the toxic mindsets that have been forced upon you, through therapy or self help or even just with time. and it’s alright if that’s a life long process. you’re allowed to be pissed off, you’re allowed to be hurt. it doesn’t make you a monster at all. the whole point is that you are trying to be kind despite it all and that you are working with what you’ve been given. if you were really some evil unimaginable beast, you wouldn’t even be willing to put forth that effort. it’s good that you’re looking inwards and trying every day to be a better person, but sometimes it’s good to take a step back to breathe. don’t over analyze your existence too much love. it all just ends up becoming so convoluted and unclear when you judge yourself for every single trait you’ve ever observed in your behaviour/personality. because growth is constant and you’re experiencing it subconsciously every single day. and then there’s the issue of perception. everyone you meet sees you through their own lens. some will see good, some may see the parts you want to keep hidden. but either way you’re a whole person, and so it’s natural to have sides of you that conflict. you don’t have to be unfalteringly happy and positive all the time. in fact it’s impossible and may be a disservice to your mental well being in the long run. ultimately i think it comes down to this. i PROMISE i wouldn’t be quoting h*rry p*otter in 2020 if i wasn’t moderately sleep deprived but i am so. it’s one of the most famous lines and it applies - “we’ve all got both light and dark inside us. what matters is the part we choose to act on. that’s who we really are.” the son of a bitch was right. and you’re doing far better than you realize, just by prioritizing kindness and trying to extend it every day. you’re a good person because you’re attempting to be, and that’s more than enough :)

#anon #hope this makes sense #fuck jk rowling

[transrightsjimin]

im sorry im not rly in the BE hype atm :((

rant coming which has nothing to do w the album but everything w stress nd fatigue nd crying nd more job stress nd sensory overload and me turning everything into a worse issue in my head etc etc

i was this morning when i saw the mv nd watched the vlive but i obv slept way too few bc i went to bed late nd woke up early for the live and i had to rush a lot w errands nd an appointment w my autism coach nd at said appointment we called a dude from the municipality to inquire abt jobcoaches nd it turned out we misunderstood what jobcoaches are as they are who u get referred to when u have a job, nd the guy found it hard to figure out what type of trajectory(?) would best fit me for help nd now i have time to think abt it and will speak him again in 2 weeks or sooner if i want to. im just so tired nd a bit hungry and on edge and one sec, im in the side of the house tht faces kids playing around aka screeching as if theyre dying every second nd its majking me only more on edge!!!!

but urgh i cried so bad during the appointment and was prob way too rudde to her before the appointment, bc she talks loudly nd sounds rude nd confronting but just naturally bc ofher tone nd language nd urghgh h thikning abt jobs nd trying to talk nd not cry too hard when trying to explain stuff to the man over the phone was rly hard, like obv its fine if he knows im crying but its just hard to talk when crying nd im just so devastated thinking abt jobs!! i dont know what type of job i could handle nd it feels like im making everythig up bc i did somehow finish two studies in uni and im privileged enough w education and whiteness tobe more easily selected for a job by e.g. last name on my cv and i shouldnt be this picky but god i cant handle smth as physically demanding and underpaid as this, im tired 4/7 days that im not working nd what i earn in those 3 days is still not enough to cover rent bc they pay only for the delivery time itself instead of more hours!!! it just feels like wtf am i doing bc the municipality guy did admit im not the usual person he works w bc i had an education, as if i dont belong in the group but its really just an issue of having -100 confidence and no job experience!! like i rly dont strive for a fancy job or ‘’’career’’’, i just bneed something that i can pay my monthly expenses w and have a bit left to save up for e.g. emergencies, additional medical bills (like the 350 euros from the adhd diagnosis and therapy, which my autism coach will contact my adhd therapist abt, like if that bill can be delayed or split up in a payment plan), paying back for loan debt eventually and MAYBE soon god forbid i save up for smth fun. and i “need” the job also to have a daily activity and some structure in my life bc a large part of the reason my schedule is so fucked up is bc i have no more set time tht i need to be anywhere or any strictness or reason to get up nd so i just dont ghhh

im always looking for reasons why i cant do smth and why smth would go wrong and im already looking at every area where getting help w getting a job can go wrong like e.g. me being too stubborn abt companies i dont agree w or me thinking i cant do anything just bc i have not much working experience outside of mail delivery :(

nd then there was this A B C task list system my adhd therapist proposed in wihc i keep track of my most to least urgent + important tasks every day nd we werent sure where to keep track of that kind of list and she suggested sticking a paper to a wall (i think id rather use my wardrobe) to write it on and change or replace that every day and it sounds like a hassle but i rly need to do it every day, nd i can try other methods but thatd be either writing it on my phone but im not always on there nd theres not a type of file i can make that doesnt move back chronologically as i make new notes

ALSO im just very frustrated w myself bc my mom wanted to come over w food and i know she was too sudden w it but if only i left on time for the stores it wouldnt have been an issue. i feel like shes rly sad she couldnt come visit. fucking hell i rushed so much back and forth from the stores that i forgot to put the leftover letters from work yesterday into the outdoor mailbox and i already stress abt this bc my current teamcoach (aka manager) is more stricter w this stuff nd recently asked for a statement / explanation by me on why there were 29 letters w/o sticker from a route i did  counted from the collected mail that were in outdoor mailboxes, and i did not do that but my only alibi / reason for not making that huge mistake was that i hadnt posted any mail yet that day and obv he wasnt happy w that. i sometimes had dreams / nightmares recently where i was late again or fucked up w a new route and got fired for it and thats quite an awful scenario / fear to me bc thats exactly why my dad was fired by his previous employee, for being late too often nd we’re the exact same. it just sucks bc i know many ppl who worry abt being late arrive to early at shit bc lol anxiety but i still arrive late every day WHILE being stressed abt it nd my whole fucking issue is that i need to break w bad patterns MYSELF, like whether i get help for autism stuff or adhd or sleep or whatnot, the homework / assignments / tasks / advice they give me, in the end i still need to be the one to do it and push through and make a change or put more effort into not going continuously back to the same distractions or demotivating black-white thinking

just URGH im so easily annoyed nd sensitive, also as in sensitive on a tactile level nd it doesnt help tht my room is a mess nd im super stinky from bts BE excitement and from squeezing my skin a lot last night, nor does the fact that i have rly bad coordination / awareness of my surroundings nd continuously bumping into shit or getting caught on smth help, which is also another reason im just so slow at work bc if i try to walk or deliver mail faster i keep end up bruising nd tripping or tear my hands on all these hard to move or sharp mail box slots if im not careful nd slower, which does still happen but not as bad when im careful

im also rly dizzy rn from haing slept too few and just urgh i “need“ a stupid fucking job, i need the money i need the structure but my god does actual labour and having to deal w colleagues every day and trying to keep up w stuff and be fast and precise enough in whatever the job is, sound horrifying hhhgghgh

OK RANT OVER IM SICK OF ME TALKING SO MUCH

#rambles #i dont even feel like explainig any of this stuff more if it was unclear #bc trying to re-tell what ppl from bureaucracies told me and each nd every thing explained is so complex

[just-an-extra-ordinary-blog]

fuck you answer all of them that you feel comfortable answering fuck you fuck you fuck yo

o wo thank you a once in a life time experience. also... i k n o w w h o y o u a r e

0. 5'7"??? 5'8"??

1. 16

2. idfk

3. no

4. no

5. again, no. im am a child of god (not rlly)

6. most ppl think im older but only for my height

7. nope.

8. maybe im afraid of needles but if i did get a tattoo it would be something pretty like flowers

9 & 10. basically same answer tattoos

11. i dont have A best friend because i DonT chOoSe fAvoriTes so @bassetthoe @comatose-max and a few others who dont have tumblr

12. dating the amazing wonderful beautiful @comatose-max (im pretty sure u sent this ask so fuckyou jk ily)

13. uhhhshouldishareornah *consideration👀👀*

14. uhhh lmao probably obvious gross stuff like feet stuff and things wjsgajsgs

15. IT chapter 1 & 2

16. literally if ur a good person and u love me for me. i dont have high standards sjshsjsh

17. @comatose-max more than fucking anything

19. uh i am a neat freak and also a perfectionist

20. everything. jk. probs the way i overthink everything and my weight

22. an elementary school teacher!! this is like one of the few things im sure about for my life (i think shsgshsgsjs)

23. uhm they kinda hate me and get mad at everything i say and do but its fine i love them anyways

24. my dads like my favorite person my mom is complicated

25. idk something outside maybe like at a park or a beach lmao again i dont have high standards. take me to a fckn 7/11 and id be happy asf

26. repetitive noises. i will literally come for ur throat if ur tapping or walking back and forth and just filling my head with unwanted background noises i s2g *proceeds to click a pen all day*

27. OkAy fIrsT oF AlL tHey Are nEiTher oF thOse but theyre rlly pretty theyre a lil shorter than me and have short curly brown hair thats super cute and brown eyes and like the best smile ever its super contagious and i cannt (u know who u fuckin are)

28. i genuinly cant think of a person i dislike wtf. oh theres one person. idk what they look like anymore tho

29. i lie a lot but i dont lie to friends unless its for a joke or smthg.

30. the work hahah. no mostly the expectations

31. "oh shit u right i shoulda known"

32. fat, stupid, lazy (used seriously) and other things. i mostly just get triggered by yelling

33. idk cant think of anything in particular. i dont get complimented that much so any compliment makes me feel better abt myself

34 & 35. idrk anything in particular for either. i just know i dont rlly like beards or super buff guys. lmao women are perfect djsgsjdg

36. i want a cute apartment literally anywhere with nice whether.

37. that im annoying and unfunny to all of my friends

39. mint chocolate chip

41. in san diego. preferably with @comatose-max

42. mashed potatoes lol

43. bill hader djshsjsh jkjk idk

44. uhh uhm uh hummingbirds legs are too weak so they cant walk

thank you whoever sent this ive literally been wanting asks for weeks lmao cUs i LoVe tAlKiNg AbouT mYself. jk its just fun and gets my mind off things and ive been needing that for a month. anyone is welcome to send me asks even if its nothing important or to vent ur problems. i cant promise good advice but ill try my best!!!

#ask game #long post #thank you #!!! #srsly this was fun lol #me #about me

[kewltie]

I just finished my finals for the semester so I should be relatively free yea? Nope. Retail hell got me in her grip so my schedule for the next couple of weeks is hectic, like so hectic that I’m working six days next week and the only day I’m off is the day I specifically requested it off because I have jury duty that day :|. Thanks management. 

Anyway, since I have finished lipstick fic I have been pondering my next projects. I wasn’t lying when I said it’ll be stepbro and social media au but thinking more clearly now I, uh, really can’t juggle these two at the same time because one is intense and emotionally draining and the other require a lot of technical work and time invested int it. So I decided I pick either one of them to finish up right now and then the other one once I finish with this one. Originally, my plan was stepbro au first and then social media au because it sounds easier but I actually don’t have a roadmap for much the storyline for vol 2. Like I know where I kinda want to go with it but like I have about 40% of it thought out???? Maybe even less and what I got so far for it is mostly things that come to me as I go. Random pieces of a jigsaw puzzle that I’m trying to make it all fit in the larger picture of it. I do have more of social media au plan out like 80% of it?? mainly because it’s what I been working on the longest so I have more concrete idea for it. 

Now, my plan is to focus on social media au first and THEN stepbro au but i get really bored when all I do is work on one thing ///o\\\ so I would like to pick up a side project! With my past (horrible) experience with lipstick where i was like ‘haha what if...” and it completely ran over me and i wasted a lot of valubale hours trying to get it done. I would like to avoid that again and not start anything but stick to the other projects that I already kicked off. 

I narrowed it down to four options (bc twitter only allow four lol /o\), so we have *insert dramatic voice*:

kasumi ‘verse: the next chapter of my terrible romcom kidfic royalty au where bakudeku’s secret love child, kasumi, is introduced to the nation and she’s an unholy terror. watch as kasumi conquers the world in the name of love :P. 

hana to ryuu: my epic desert fantasy about a living flower (!!!) who songs (supposedly) can spring forth life and is offer as a tribute to a ruthless tyrant king from a nation where the land is so brutal and harsh that flowers won’t even grow. (note: i prob go revised it bc ahhh i have bit of problem about it but otherwise i

when dandelion roars: the deaged!izuku fics where bb!izuku falls under the care of a guilt-ridden katsuki who can’t bring himself to fully embrace izuku bc forgiveness is not something he find easy to accept for himself. 

sugar, we’re going down: the OG!!! my first big project and honestly it’s just various outsider!pov on bakudeku being close and ppl wondering WELL ARE YOU DATING OR FUCKING WHAT. 

you can vote on them here: ON MY TWITTER! Sorry only ppl with twitter acc can vote but if you dont have one, you can send me an ask (anon or not) or just reply to this post and I’ll count it when I tally it at the end. 

Thanks for participating bc im so indecisive!!!! 

#writing status

[briteboy]

MORE ASKS I’VE BEEN IGNORING!!!!!!!

GET ‘EM WHILE THEY’RE HOT

P.S. ALL OF U WHO SENT ME THE CHAIN THINGY ILYSOMUCH 

Why is her step-douche such a foken piece of shit? omg i hate him

some mysteries are never meant to be explained tbh. why is he so ugly and evil? who wronged him? but also who cares he’s in jail forever now good riddance ugly

I know this is probably really bad, but after I saw the newest molly posts, I thought of that video where the little girl is yelling "MISS KEISHA, MISS KEISHA, oh my fukin gosh she fukin dead"

OMFGFD I DIDN’T KNOW WHAT THAT VIDEO WAS SO I JUST WATCHED IT AND I’M LAUGHIN

i don’t blame u i bet when it happens i’m gonna be like “u know she ded”

(To the previous anon) i agree with you so, so much! In Poland, these dumbass politicians are letting shooting pregnant bisons (?? Im not sure how they're called) become legal. Like BITCH WHAT. Can you imagine??? A fucking pregnant lil' cow getting shot????? I feel Molly's pain on an emotional level rn (sorry if this is too nsfw, just needed to get that outta my system...)

i think this was in response to someone saying that hurting pregnant women is one of the worst crimes but um WTF shooting animals at all makes me itchy but pregnant ones..............nah that’s......nah

it’s ok get it outta ur system i’m here 4 u

the first thing I check in the morning is your account.... you have me whipped! ;|

OMG WHA LMAO REALLY that’s wild. i feel like i’m the only one who looks at my page which is dumb but like idk i still feel like a little kid that no one cares about lmao. but then you guys exist and amaze me with your responsiveness every day and i just ;____________; ily all

hi Sunny. first of all i'm gonna say i love your story and your editing style so much! your blog is goals like literally. i need an advice if you don't mind. you always find such amazing angles for your pictures while mine are so boring. any tips or tricks you can share?

HI thank you so much ;-; sooooo i’ve been thinking about this question the past couple of times i went in game, trying to figure out how to describe how i take pictures. for one thing i live in tab mode lmao. meaning you press the tab button on your keyboard to go into camera mode and get all these sexy angles and super zoom and stufffff. i almost always zoom in super far idk why. so there’s one tip. i honestly just play around with going up and down with the q and e keys (i think?) until i find angles i like. i take a lottttt of pictures with so many different angles just so i have a lot to choose from. basically i try to focus on different things in each picture in order to get a mix of the most diverse and dynamic shots possible. you just need to experiment and get creative. i know that’s the most vague advice ever but really just try a new angle that you’ve never considered before and i bet you’ll get cool results. an interesting setting is also the biggest factor, because certain objects and their placements will give you interesting results. 

i honestly want to print out your reaction pic to that one post and just hang it on my wall, put it in my heart locket necklace, stamp it on people's faces, start an email thread with it. i love it.

an add on to the last ask i sent about your reaction pic. i've been looking at it religiously since it was posted, and i dont regret a minute of it. LMAO I'LL STOP NOW.

SAKJDLJKGKSDAF STOPPPP LMAOOO i looked so ugly but that was my pure unadulterated reaction to that question and i trust you all to not judge my ugliness and instead share this reaction with me. i’m glad u liked it that much, i just printed it out and i’m cutting it into a small heart to put inside ur locket ok

everytime i hear cigarette daydreams by cage the elephant i think of a serious case of the novembers like its so fitting and then i get all emo when i listen to it lmao rip

OMMMMGGGGGGG YESSSSS how have i never made that connection before honestly. cage the elephant is one of my faves and i’ve seen them perform twice actually!! i’m watching the music vid for that song now and even that reminds me of my story ;-; i cry

thank you for sending this, and also i cry @ the fact that you used the actual title *dies* now this song is gonna make me emo til the end of time thx

i might sound like some crazy stalker fan but i just want to say you are so freakin awesome and nice and funny and cute and (i can go on forever) so caring! i love your blog so much and all the hard work and care you put into all your posts and followers. thanks for making my day and making me smile so much. you have no clue how much i look forward to seeing your posts and your hilarious hashtags and answers from asks and AMAZING story posts. im sorry i just wanted to let you know ur awesome ily

OFMG WHAT!!!!!! I AM ONLY AN EEL!!!!!! but no you don’t sound like a crazy stalker, i actually love this, you’re too sweet, thank you ;-; i’m just blushin so much reading this omg. YOU EVEN LIKE MY TAGS WOW that’s true love. ily ;-; <333

how do you get your sims' facial expressions to line up with your scenes? I feel like my sims' faces are never right :(

tbh i just use a lot of the same neutral poses...my go-to’s are @helgatisha‘s poses lol. they’re the easiest to work with when i do just plain talking scenes, and often i tweak my sims’ eyebrows and mouths with the liquify tool if i want them to look a bit more concerned, sad, mad, happy, etc., it works like a charm!! i also tend to play around with angles, you’d be surprised how much a different angle can enhance a scene.

Hey smol bean, I'm sent you an ask and now I feel bad that it probably made you feel anxious because you didn't answer it. It was the one about you not liking my posts, I have anxiety too so I'm sorry If I made you feel sad. I think I'm just looking for validation from people I look upto you get me? Anyway sorry again, don't worry about it! Love you!

hiya bb, i know you saw my answer to your original post (and i’m sorry it got some negative attention, i didn’t mean for that to happen by any means) anyway don’t sweat it, and i really appreciate this follow-up message. you didn’t make me feel sad, i just wanna know what i can do. it’s just a hard question y’know. i understand what you mean, i think everyone wants validation to some degree. tbh you can just come off anon and message me, i promise it’s not as nerve-wracking as it seems! ily

How did you make Santi's tattoos? I want some like that for my Sims but idk how to do it

boop

I HAVE A FEELING THAT MOLLY IS GOING TO DIE DURING THE BIRTH OF THE BEAN OR IT HAS SOMETHING TO DO WITH HER STEPFATHER FINDING OUT ABOUT THE BEAN

WELP U WERE RIGHT ABOUT ONE THING

how did you make your characters page on your blog like that?

uoohhh like what?? i used this theme (monolog) if that’s what you mean aheh. here’s a guide on how to use custom page themes

okay so THIS IS MY THEORY: they might keep the baby and molly might actually carry it to full term, but then the kid dies in childbirth and either molly also dies or maybe kills herself or gets killed later? or maybe she's still alive but just won't speak to santi anymore cause she like can't look him in the eye after all of that or idk?? since ppl were sending theories i wanted to add mine lmao. another possible theory is that the stepdad finds out and kills her but thats TOO DARK omg

TOO DARK U SAY...WELL!!! it’s not AS dark as you guessed but only marginally

If Molly turns out to be alive and raising their kid alone (though from what I'm seeing in response to most questions I think that may not be the route) am I allowed to slap Santi (unless Molly didn't give him the option to help) because raising a child alone is not easy I've watched my mom do it for years.

YEAH i would give you permission to slap him lmao he would be a grade A piece o’ shit if that were the case. i would never ever write that tho because santi does own up to his actions if they’re that detrimental. his altruistic nature, no matter how backwards, would never allow him to do that.

There will be complication with the abortion so she will not be able to carry a baby anymore and she's going to kill herself OR her step dad is going to find out and he'll beat her to death. And in both situation Santi his blaming himself because he wasn't there at the right time... Okay I really really hope I'm wrong now !

I don't even follow your story very closely but every time I see your posts my heart hurts.

OMFG...that’s how u know the pain is real

but like wow my stuff is really so visceral that even my apathetic followers can feel the hurt...that’s real...that’s real my guy

omg!! you should 100% play or at least watch a playthrough of life is strange! legit the best game ever made, its so beautiful. the storyline kills you a thousand times over (much like your beautiful story) <3333

yaaaa i’ve heard lots of good things about it!! my bf played it actually, maybe he’ll revisit it again someday and i’ll watch him do it (i’m only a fan of video games if i can watch them like a movie lmao) thank you btw <3

I am shook and I worship you and your story and you are amazing WOW BYE

WORSHIP LMAO WHAT!!! PLS I AM UNDESERVING...ily tho don’t worship false gods

Do you let Molly and the younger versions of your characters frolic around your main save or do they have a separate one?

UM YES LMAO because i didn’t even know you could have separate saves until after i started the flashbacks lmao i’m...a noob. i don’t want separate saves anyway because 1) it’s too much of a hassle switching back and forth and 2) it gets too confusing for me and i’d be afraid of overwriting one save with another and NOPE too much anxiety for that soooo yeah there’s three santis in my game: child, teen and adult lmfao (fun fact: teen santi’s name is literally just Lil Santi)

I made it to my senior year with 6 A's and 1 B ... Be proud of me too? 😂 Lmao I told this to people and some of them were just like .. okay cool?! LMAO it's so funny but also kinda sad

I AM PROUD OF YOU TOO!!!!!!!!! my smart childrens

“okay cool” UM PLEASE that’s a feat...at my school if you got an A in a class in senior year you were allowed to be exempt from the final. so yeah that rules. ily

#nonsims #saviorhide #anonymous #THEY ARE DONE #FINALLY #EXCEPT WCIFS LOL DON'T...don't hate me #i try

[moidse]

le sigh

its been a minute since i’ve typed my thoughts here... 

idk if its my depression or what but it seems like every time i come back home from cbus i am like meh about going back. 

which i mean, i have to help **** do literally everything and it isn’t really fun. and there just isn’t anything to do right now. 

I just feel like I’m not pushing myself as much. I feel like i have a list of things to do and then after like 3 days i drive back to cbus and completely abandon my to-do list. 

which i could try harder to work there... i just don’t even have a working laptop right now and we dont work well together. we lowkey encourage each other to procrastinate. 

I just feel like if i stop going i can have a regular schedule of like walking an hour 5 days a week. which i could do at their place if the weather is good. like idk maybe i could just hang out on the weekends, like on Friday after I’ve done my walk and whatever... 

Because I am staying too many days fr fr. 

I just want to push myself harder. I’m just letting myself go in many ways... I’ve put on a lot of weight... I have just stopped working on my music video idea...      i stopped working on my songs... i stopped with my film idea...                               I haven’t been moving forward with my to do list in a really long time and I think spending less time there or rather a more structured about of time could help me get a sort of routine... like maybe i only go saturday and sunday... and mon-fri I have to do what I need.  

I also just feel like ***** is always like its okay its okay that i’m doing nothing right now ... which, is nice and i understand it is okay and im not failing but i don’t need that type of encouragement right now. I know I have the power to motivate myself like i’ve done in the past. 

I’m just tired of feeling sorry for myself.. I just need to eliminate the distractions...

ugh.. also.. like i feel like i am just less attracted to them... like how i felt in the beginning is fading i feel like.... idk if that’s normal or what but i don’t feel the same spark whatsoever... this came into my head recently when i saw a pic of them from b4 i met them. it instantly reminded me of how hot i thought they were when i was just creeping on their instagram and didn’t know them well yet. they looked really hot and like a good time. that probably sounds a bit sleezy but like i mean they looked like the sex would be good and it just isn’t. and i guess it’s just like i remember looking at them in this certain way and feeling like they were so hot and like now.... i can’t see them in that same light... at all.... i dont see them as the same hot person i first saw them as... and that’s because that person i was imagining in the beginning doesn’t exist. and that’s clear to me now... i had this fantasy of kaiya and then it didn’t line up. 

---

i’d never hit on someone before and have them explain they are asexual like 3 months into talking through emails... lmao this whole situation was sooo not what im used to...and tbh i was really throwing myself at ***** because i had just left **** for them basically and i felt stupid if i just dropped the best sex to be single.... but really the jokes on me because the person i threw myself at ended up being asexual and not wanting to fuck me anyways lmao.  it was like i was too proud. too proud to admit this is a bit of a rebound for me. that’s why that night i first kissed them was such a W for me. i didn’t want to lose that feeling. my ex tries to get me back, i say no and they leave sad, i hit on my crush and kiss them for the first time... then i drive home with my even bigger crush and tell them how the kissing was weird lmao... i hate myself. lmao

the only reason i even went back to ***** was because bigger crush didn’t like me and i felt like I took an L so i wanted attention from them to not feel sad...rejection really has me crawling to anyone to feel validated. and i feel like i just did this pattern in 2019.. I hit on someone i have a big crush on they reject me, i bounce back to my ex to try to pretend i didn’t take an L and to show i can get ppl and im desirable.. then that ex becomes too much and i got what i wanted from that so i just drop them, basically ghost them as soon as i hit on ***** ... then i instantly broke it off when my ex again.. and in my head i just kept thinking i better not have this fall through now cuz i really don’t wanna take another L...and the whole summer i was very stressed at every email because i just wanted this person to like me...i couldn’t tell what they were thinking the whole time cuz it didn’t seem like they liked me like that... only for them to come back.. and ive just been so sure this whole summer we’re gonna fuck and then they casually say they are asexual...  

that just hurt and was annoying. bitch watch me ask ppl str8 up if they are asexual now... ffs .. if im ever in a weird predicament again where im emailing ppl for months before fucking.

i just... dont even feel like masturbating anymore... it just makes me feel sad. the sexual connection just isnt there. it was there when we were tripping on acid. that was the first time i could feel a back and forth between us. i just dont know if im in love with them anymore. they aren’t the fantasy i had in my head when i first saw them and had an instant crush... and tbh their making out is weird because it isn’t sexual... its just like kissy suck on my lip .. its making me realize what makes making out hot is the sexual tension and it isn’t there for them. i just wish they would’ve told me earlier they were asexual but i guess i also understand like i didn’t ask, but idk i also think like wouldn’t you want to make sure you’re with a partner who wants to be with someone asexual? its just like, i feel like im hanging on by a single fred. lol. and that fred has been that oh maybe the sex will be better but i have low hope. because its more than sex.. its like ur sexual energy and vibe should be there like all the time not just when we are alone in their room having sex... like there is no sexual chemistry... it just feels like we are good friends who make out and they rub me off... it feels very elementary. im tired of like pressing them to let me touch them and shit. that really shouldn’t be how it is.. if they dont want me to touch them then like fine.

it also bothered me they mentioned me going on ssri’s when literally like everyone else i know doesn’t suggest those because you lose your sex drive and im like bitch why dont you change your meds and get off ssri’s ... it’s just too much... i hate that i’ve had thoughts like well maybe i’ll be happier in this relationship if im taking ssri’s .... which i don’t think that’s healthy either. i just feel like every week im discouraged this will ever hit right. i really dont feel as much as a spark...