#and that's very damaging to grow up with :')

[wormboyfriendcentralstation]

heathcliff: i killed cathy...... im a horrible person in every timeline. my revenge killed her. my remorse literally broke through timelines.

catherine who got back at heathcliff by stealing a house to remodel into the Magic Cocaine Labyrinth after draining the financial assets of england's least tragically ill victorian man, making carmen contact her copyright lawyers by sealing her ambiguously dead body into a glass tank while her brain powers a building, and potentially hiring the Mueseumafia of Modern Art because if she pays them with cash she doesnt have to report her Green-Energy-Human-Tank Powered Hydrogen Bomb Basement Factory's earnings to the IRS or whatever the city uses: 'tis what you get for trying to boyfail without your girlboss, methinks 😇😇😇😇😇

#limbus company #limbus company spoilers #posted to the wrong blog lololol #anyways she's a science fiction villain who everyone treats like jesus. #''catherine is MISERABLE ALWAYS'' she was certainly going through it! #she was also literally coping through making terrors and horrors in her basement lab like dexter #and is this a result of heathcliff's self worth being like. bulldozed from every direction as he grew up? #yes. #they're both very fascinating characters but someone get that man away from that woman's blast radius #him: i'll get a good job. i'll internalize all of my abuse. i'll be Good Enough For Her #her: gonna grow some psychic damage nukes in my lab like rutabagas to harvest for the growing season. then i'll turn into a house!

[tornado1992]

Miles’ tails are way bigger than the rest of his body. That allows him to fly, and even though it makes him look way tinier than he is (and he is already too little for his age) he doesn’t mind.

He will never outgrow his tails, it doesn’t matter how many vitamins he takes or how much physical therapy he gets, spending the first four years of his life living off garbage scraps and eating less than once a day stunted his growth forever.

Good news is that he’ll always be able to fly, bad news is that he’ll never achieve the younger sibling goal of being taller than your older brother.

#Sonic should be happy beamcause he’ll always be the tallest sibling #but he’s not happy about it #he wouldn’t mind being shorter than his lil bro if it meant he could’ve grow properly #but chaos knows it’s a miracle the kid was even alive when he found him #he tried to give the kid everything he needed #but it was already too late to change that #I know you guys like that take on tails being taller than sonic when he reaches his puberty and smthn #and also the one on tails not being able to fly as an adult because he would be way too big for his Tails #but no #his tails are massive and there’s a reason for it #haha his tails needed the few nutrients he could get because they were the part of his body that took the most damage #his tails got most of the very few nutrients he got as a toddler because HELL those tails needed it #so they’ll always be the biggest part of his body #broken bones deep cuts almost bleeding out #but his tails protected him #his tails allowed him to reach for the stars #his tails allowed him to keep up with his big brother #so he doesn’t mind #it does conflict him #but he doesn’t think he would change it #sonic headcanon #sonic the hedgehog #miles tails prower

[un-pearable]

darkly funny to me that lloyd “father issues” garmadon is the one who introduced jay to starfarer

#text✨ #ninjago #having fic ideas…. #i am a comic collector (bad hobby to pick up but very fun and intoxicating). have a story idea of jay and lloyd working together to #collect all of the OG starfarer run and they never fully do (are Children) (older comics are expensive) (starfarer as fictional x-men and #the OG run starting with the equivalent of giant-size x-men no.1 that is STUPID expensive and one of the most valuable comics ever) #and then years later after they’ve both had to grow up more. years later during like. the year long gap or smthn they jokingly start doing #it again. half their original collection is lost or damaged from various times they had to move or the bounty was destroyed but they have #a good start. lloyd’s finding other comic shops in ninjago city while jay finds them occasionally out in the smaller cities #and they find The issue. the big one. when jay remembers that itty little tidbit about the other person in his life that cared about starfar #yeah that’s right obligatory reveal angst baby. i am nothing if not consistent >:]

[musubiki]

fun tcwg fact but one of the hardest opponents lime has ever fought is actually corven, murdas (taller but younger) brother. because post-timeskip lime has zero magic attack capabilities and corven has a broken defense stat

#highest solid defense stat in the whole story #corven is the kind of character to get hit with a car and stand up without a scratch #lime beats his ass and thinks (heh easy) and then the guy stands up and only took 2 hp damage #an AWFUL fight for lime #i actually dont think he even wins i think mochi has to step in #(corven is ass against magic attacks just like everyone else) #but DEFENSE?? #naw #especially since his attacks also while technically magic are VERY physical damage based #rock fists essentially #think wriothesley but instead of iron gloves its stone #not a good day for lime #luckily this was a one-time fight and also was more of a (fight first ask questions later) type fight #they werent enemies its just that the first instinct in the magic community is beat the other guys ass if you dont know them #arrogant ass lime is like (watch this mochi...i got this one) and then struggles #(this guy is a monster) they say after beating his ass like 10 times and he still gets up #growing up as a worker in a mining city means you get rocks dropped on you for a living #insane nat defense build-up

[mossypidder]

Working on finishing up a cloak for a cosplay while Nugget was out. She thinks she needs to steal my fleece.

#i love her #She’s like #My favorite person #also we finally got her into a competent vet and I honestly really like them #They are specifically bird specialists #the people who gave us nugget put her back in the nest three times and she fell out four from a very high height #starlings are very butt heavy when they are babies #which means she would have fell on her butt from high up four times #we had to help her poop the first two weeks because she couldn’t do it herself #we’ve always thought she looked hunched #and when she molted #her tail never grew back #We’ve always wondered if her butt or spine was damaged in the fall #and they were worried about it as well so they did xrays and Sure which #*enough #it was #in such a way that would reduce blood flow to her tail #and feathers need blood flow to grow #therefore no tail #She’s now on meds that are supposed to help circulation to smaller parts of the body #We shall see #Anyway #ramble that literally no one asked for #Nugget #starling #pet starling #starling bird #european starling

[etrevil]

they are not doomed by the narrative, they doom the narrative

#their very existence changes the course of the story #them meeting? opens up to a whole can of worms #them having their first fight? #leads to sooooo many future fights that slowly increase in collateral damage and feelings to each other #them separating for a bit? ohohoho #the world is sad #everything continues on #but even the stars are weeping for their growing distance #they reunite with a hand near their neck? #start of a blossoming relationship #this started as skk and ended up as orv lol #bungou stray dogs #bsd #omniscient reader's viewpoint #orv #add more pairings that seem to match #dazai osamu #osamu dazai #bsd dazai #chuuya nakahara #bsd chuuya #soukoku #bsd soukoku #skk #kim dokja #yoo joonghyuk #joongdok #the gays win #shitpost

[shirkers2018dirsanditan]

barbie is greta gerwig’s redemption arc even if a lot of the people memeing barbie have no respect for her as a filmmaker and i’m happy and excited for that because i feel she’s been unfairly targeted by The Discourse. but one big thing that has bothered me more about the anti-barbie discourse is also the lack of respect for her as a filmmaker but it’s even worse because it punished her for having authorial intent while making a blockbuster based on existing IP, and trying to balance that as a filmmaker while adapting mattel’s very first live action barbie movie. nearly every review has noted that she was somewhat successful in this endeavor. but even if she wasn’t, she did what the generic male directors of male-led franchises rarely ever do, and in her very first blockbuster as well. whether or not it was intentional and whether one was even aware of it, a lot of the anti-barbie discourse was sexist, or became so quickly. and that’s not cool and is actually very annoying

#it was a very glaring double standard #and it moved beyond merely critizing the feminist reband of barbie itself in the culture #and instead made a whole bunch of uncharitable assumptions and sometimes even took a hostile posture against a fucking movie #specifically directed by a woman who has earned more respect than anybody wants to give her #that should say so-called feminist rebrand #like sure some people have been OD about barbie but that is almost always the case #people were OD as fuck about the cashgrab ass spiderman movie from last summer or whenever that was #and about the spiderverse cartoons #so why pray tell was this different lol #let alone worse #this is ONE movie not a franchise that has taken over the entire cultural landscape and perhaps irreparably damaged the film ecosystem #there was that one post that was literally like. barbie is different than marvel or the lego movie because uhhh its for adults #like yeah and so were those #but superhero and legos for boys barbie for girls so barbie bad #grow up!!!

[valeffelees]

only bad thing about being in a fandom where one of the characters canonically has wings is the painful lack of classic wingfic. where is my everything's the same but people have bird wings watford au where one day baz notices simon hasn't been grooming his wings bc of an injury to his ribs so he sits on his bed and makes a whole fuss about how "i'm not doing this to be nice, snow, your wings are just a travesty to look at" and then proceeds to carefully and lovingly tidy his feathers in drawn out silence while they both pretend grooming someone else's wings isn't one of the most intimate things you can do for another person. will this heartbreak never end

#i have an old wingfic that never left the zero draft stage and it was suuuper fucking plotty #simon was still the chosen one in it but not in a weird sex magic kinda way like he was just home grown like that so no humdrum #so lucy is alive and he grew up with her and the mage (and they have a dog!) (simon named her ''little simon'' lmfao) #meanwhile baz isn't a vampire but natasha still died when he was five bc ok i don't know how to explain the lore behind this #bc it has to do with a skeevy blackmarket trade involving human wings like it was kinda dark ngl #but the long and short of it is that baz and tasha are kidnapped and tasha is killed keeping baz safe but baz's wings are damaged #pretty severely and so one of them never grows to full size and it leaves him flightless #n e way simon and baz don't get on bc the mage is still the mage and the old families are still the old families #but they are roommates as usual #and half-term their eighth year pitch manor is raided by blackmarket poachers and mordelia is kidnapped and the whole grimm family is #in shambles so baz goes right to simon about it and there's this reverse of the simon-showing-up-at-baz's-door scene #where baz shows up at simon's door a complete WRECK to ask for help getting his sister back #and simon is like. why are you asking ME for help? #and baz is like. bc you're the only one i know who can #and then they fucking steal one of the mage's cars and hit the road [so good right now by fall out boy starts playing] #and then it's just kind of a normal mission fic about them finding mordelia and saving her life and baz falls out a very high window #and simon catches him etc. #i love wingfics so much #sighs wistfully #i think i need to be alone w my gdocu for while #valen and the void

[lith-myathar]

.

#really really hate how thoughtless and oblivious i can be to my own bad behavior #ill know something is important or that a shouldn't do a particular thing #but over time and assumptions and small acts of carelessnes shit just....fades and accumulates and one day #i look up and ive done something very stupid and hurt someone else #and i didn't feel it happening #my mind will take things and hide them from me is what it feels like. ill know they're there but it fades into the background noise #i am hard on the things in my life including people and relationships. and i am always so vulnerable to my own fuckin lmfao inattentivenes #this is why i struggle so much with the idea of ever having an intimate partner or children. it doesn't matter how much i care. #eventually and inevitably i do damage. #and i know consciously that people make mistakes and all you can do is try to course correct and make it right. but it's better #not to hurt anyone in the first place and i really don't know if i will ever be capable of that. #trying to convince myself this kind of shit is growing pains but man. man. i can't stop being what i am and it really #really feels sometimes like i am just destined to break and neglect #but then that ''im broken'' thing feels like trying to dodge around taking responsibility and improving. and i should be better than that. #but god how tf are you supposed to stop dissociating from the reality of what you're doing when you're. dissociated. #all i can ever think to do is isolate #*sigh* guys i think i might need to graduate to therapy with a trauma specialist #or adjust my medication. god. im so tired. #why is it so gd hard to be a normal decent person. it doesn't seem hard but then

[asjjohnson]

I've finished the bottle of pain killers I bought in November. haha, I guess I hadn't needed to worry about their short expiration date. (I already bought more, by the way)

I thought it would've helped a bit more for this morning's headache. (if I didn't think it would also increase the risk of side effects I would drink some coffee to increase the dose.)

If I'm not careful, one of these days during a headache I'll tell a doctor to go ahead and crack my head open.

...When not having a headache, I want to avoid that.

(but I'll probably be fine soonish. Just whining a bit. Despite the headaches having been getting more mild over these months, I seem to be getting more sensitive. I guess I'm just tired of it.)

(...pondering risking the internal bleeding and other bad side effects of a coffee boost. ...But then again the taste/smell of coffee might make me throw up. :/ )

#the brain scan I'd insisted on showed a tiny little bump. too small yet to push against anything. I shouldn't be able to feel it. #It's probably a red herring but that's what sawing my head open would be for if I were to impulsively do it. #...of course; if I did; I would have headaches for possibly months after from the surgery itself. ...maybe worse ones. #...and I don't want part of my head shaved. It's even where I part my hair. It takes at least seven years to grow back! #there's also the likely ridges and scars; and infections. And chance of damaging part of the brain. #I wanna leave it be unless it becomes daaangerous. don't consider it. it's probably not even related to the headaches. #...coffee boost? ...I'm probably just feeling pressurey now instead of pain-pain though. Medicine doesn't help with that. :/ #...I'm probably imagining it into hurting more by focusing on it so much. #...or maybe lying in bed is why. I should probably not be horizontal. ...but I also don't wanna get up. getting up might hurt too. I don't #aah it's getting boring I guess I'll get up. ...very slowly.

[good-to-drive]

I wanted to make a post about presentism in our discussion of John Lennon and Richard Nixon's mental illness(es) but I'm legit concerned that if y'all find out how horrible Nixon's life was you'll start drawing him with anime eyes and calling him your baby and I don't want to be personally responsible for that

#i want to see it but i don't want it on my conscience #because tbh horrible men with horrible childhoods are a very nuanced and complex conversation #no Nixon isn't absolved of his racism and sexism because his parents told him his brother died bc he wasnt good enough #but OF COURSE that experience informed his development and later choices #people who are brutally damaged sometimes grow up to commit brutal acts #and we're so wrapped up in whether we can absolve them that we forget to try to understand them #which has an inherent value especially with a president

[lesbiansanemi]

WARNING FOR ANIMAL DEATH/MUTILATION IN THE TAGS

I think I’ve figured out why it’s the stuff with my cats that gets me the most viscerally upset when it comes to my roommate and I think I need to tell him why that is… we had a talk and he apologized for a lot of stuff but I just feel like I need to explain why I react so intensely to him hating my cats/wanting me to get rid of them

#like there’s the obvious things I’ve said before that ANY pet owner would feel the same about obvious #but like. okay I love cats. I’ve loved cats my WHOLE life #not just cats but animals in general #animals were baby’s first special interest #and I grew up on a farm and I had usually at least 8 pets at a time growing up #that I got money for by doing odd jobs and you know as a child you can spend all your money on your hobbies #and I love animals so I had pets #specifically I always had at least 3-4 cars #*cats #my mom’s first husband hated cats… fucking DESPISED them #and he talked about hating them/getting rid of them all the time #and. well. when I ever did anything to really piss him off #(which you know as a nine year old could be something as simple as breathing too loudly or some shit) #he would kill them #that man killed probably like 20 cats #cuz even after I was old enough to process ‘don’t get more cats bad things will happen to them’ #my mom would bring home cats cuz she ALSO loved and wanted cats #even when I would beg her not to because I knew they were going to die #she never cared because in that moment she wanted cats #and obviously this was awful and damaging #and now that I live on my own with my two cats who are my BABIES that I love and cherish #my roommate talking about hating them and wanting them gone…. #yeah it’s uh. um. hitting some really specific nerves #obviously I do not think he would EVER EVER do something like that #because you know. he’s not an insane control freak who hates me and animals #it’s still hitting those nerves #and yeah I think I need to tell him that for us to start coming to an understanding #like i get you don’t LOVE my cats you don’t have to #but you can’t talk that way about them… or I’m going to get VERY upset and defensive #kaz rambles

[neverendingford]

.

#tag talk #fuck. I might just be a straight woman. #like. I like men. and the more I transition the more I vibe with binary womanhood. #sure I don't like getting shoved into restrictive femininity. but I vibe with womanhood as separate from femininity. #anyway. I might be straight. and In ten years it's very possible that being trans becomes a much less huge part of my life #because it will stop being something that I do and something that I wish for and simply something that I am #yeah yeah whatever hi my name is Reggie and I like men #I just. as much as I don't like certain restrictive gender roles I find myself slotting very comfortably into others #and I realize that my idea of gender and their roles was very much shaped by my female role models growing up #and a lot of the disconnect and distress when growing up was due to not being able to follow the path everyone else did. #all my girl friends were growing up into women and I was stuck on the man track. #and being gay was the closest I could get to being myself #but I'm closer than I've ever been before to being able to live my truth as myself #still not gonna shave my legs unless it's sometime in the future for a very specific event. #I like them fuzzy. they make me feel cool. #I like having some cultural masculinity still. I just don't want to be defined by it #talking about my binary trans experience is always a little weird because I'm aware of how binary I'm describing things #and I get that if my words were used to describe someone else's experience it might end up sounding hella transphobic #but these words are for me. they're my experience. they're my life not someone else's. #and this is how my identity works. #it's like how feminism protects the right of trad wives to be trad wives. #we just gotta recognize that just because one woman wants to be the designated dishwasher not every woman feels that way. #anyway. I might be dating a guy by this time next week. he's cool so far and we kinda got match-made by a mutual friend #we watched Redline tonight and it's hella good #he's really cool but I feel like I've got something to provide and to bring to the relationship. so we're still on peer-level I think. #which is new. usually I'm way ahead of the other person. maybe my fault for fishing in the bad fish barrel #the emotionally damaged and burdened fish barrel.

[july-19th-club]

i think the failure of the yellowjackets approach and (to an extent, because it absolutely doesn't land perfectly all the time) success of the umbrella academy approach to the "teens in life-changing danger must reconnect all grown up" plot is that yellowjackets contains very grounded concepts treated with almost TOO much *oomph* and TUA contains very elaborate concepts that it treats elaborately. with yellowjackets whenever there's ten different chaotically overlapping plots i just get annoyed that they can't stick with one or two, settle down and really stew in them, whereas when there's ten different chaotically overlapping plots on the bad sibling show im like yeah comic book. that's exactly where you're supposed to be . but no that's not it actually. still thinking out loud. it's that yellowjackets sometimes deviates from its central question which is 'how do we live the rest of our lives with Who We Became Out There' to do other stuff that doesn't connect well and comes off over-the-top because it's disconnected. but TUA's central question is 'how do we live the rest of our lives with Who We Became Because Of Dad' and absolutely every single poor decision they make or relationship they bungle or disaster they fail to avert comes right back to that question no matter how wacky a path it takes to get there

#thinking about this because of my Idea #which is a little bit 'teens in lifechanging circumstances all grown up' . so i was combing through examples i know of the theme #and thinking about what i like and dont like about each of them #the thing is that if the plot is 'you fuck each other up and save each other's lives and alter each other forever' is that like... #once you have that element that element becomes the driving force. #yj sometimes gets too into its present-day intrigue in ways that DONT tie strongly enough back to the crash . they sometimes spin out weird #like the adam plot which was only very tangentially to do with shauna's issues #or the walter plot which was just sillygoofy misty times and honestly a waste of elijah wood tbh #but really far mroe than yj or tua or anything else the idea is animorphs-inspired #not in the aliens and space battles and all-out totally unsubtle war novel facets. but just. the question i think might open up my idea #from 'here are some characters' to 'here's why they're even in the same story'. is: #when your protags are thirteen-year-olds irreparably damaging each other in order to save a world that doesn't know they're even doing so. #and THEN THEY GROW UP. every single thing that happens to them comes back to that

[marimeeko]

Ok, I know the theories and claws are flying about Eri running somewhere, and the Rewind Tomura theory, and is she about to get involved and rewind Tomura into Tenko.

But I really think it's not what it looks like because Eri's horn is really small right now. And not too long ago, in the story itself, she rewound Mirio and that used up her built up energy, right?

Even if she is close enough geographically to get to their battle, I don't think she has the energy built up to rewind Tomura ALL the way to a young, Tenko state.

#bnha spoilers #i guess i could be wrong #and quirk singularity and quirk evolution is a thing #HOWEVER #i dont think its likely #and legit how far away has izuku and tomura gotten from where Eri is now?? #theyre likely very far away? #but idk #i might be wrong #we will see i suppose #i feel like tomura getting rewound into tomura doesnt really address some of the trauma and developments that Tomura has endured #like he has legitimate points #and even if he is reqound to Tenko #it wouldnt give him 100 percent a new start #because hed still grow up and history would have him as the biggest bbeg of all time #even if there is a lot of damage control and izuku changes a lot of hearts and minds about the situation #what afo did to him and what he did to the world will still exist #so #idk #i dont even know what i want to happen #but like i dont think eri will be rewinding him? #idk just thoughts

[feretra]

don’t imagine salome on her knees in a temple, veiled and nigh in a trance, clearly ecstatic and in tears

that’s all, don’t do that

#ooc #[ doesn’t matter what i do or what verse she ends up in ] #[ put her in a holy place and her blood sings to her ] #[ it’s like she’s completely bereft while simultaneously in ecstasy ] #[ it’s so hard to explain the complexity of the emotions going on ] #[ she probably still has very distant celestial ancestry even in her bg3 ] #[ and her parents always said her hands were touched by devils growing up ] #[ so I’m sure she still has that divine/profane extreme she flits between at times ] #[ salome’s parents have damaged her psyche just as badly as her body tbqh ]