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#and then survived the challenge alone
cookkoo · 5 months
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Drawtober 2023 day 30: Rush
"Look at Yusuke and that speed! Nothing can stop this guy!" "Hey Ryuji! What are you doing!? Are you giving up!?" "Ren! You are slowing down! C'mon!"
Previous days: [1][2][3][4][5][6][7][8][9][10][11][12][13][14][15][16][17][18][19][20][21][22][23][24][25][26][27][28][29]
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we-are-dogclan · 2 months
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Moon 66 - Healing
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You’re small for your age, kid…
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markiza297 · 6 months
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I drew this right after having a mental breakdown do anything you please with this information
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villainsidestep · 27 days
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evil beckers thought….. just how many autopsies Did they send chen ?
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genuinely shocked at the amount of people that think character death = good story. In most circumstances, character deaths seem like an easy way out for shock value rather than meaningful development (Signora for example). Some of the best character arcs are those where the writers had to figure out how to develop the character in the arc of the story rather than just killing them and moving on
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banannabethchase · 1 year
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Sometimes I think about the absolutely ridiculous things I did in college and I'm shocked I survived relatively intact.
#Shit that happened fall 2010-2014 Including but not limited to#Walking in a tiny ladybug costume and three inch heels during an early blizzard Halloween 2011#Chugging wine from the bottle and chipping my tooth#Opening a corked wine bottle with a knife#Challenging a gigantic douchebag who threatened to assault my roommate#Opened the door to my suite to cuss out two men shit talking previously described roommate outside of it#Laughed in a very large guy's face when he asked if he was coming back to my room with me#Walked alone through my college town drunk MULTIPLE TIMES to chase after my friends who dangerously self medicated to the point of oblivion#My roommate was having what we later discovered was a manic episode and I had to neutralize the situation and failed#Leading to her throwing a couch and multiple items of furniture at me#Being the person she would say 'don't let me ___ tonight' to and then having to stop the superpowered drunk version of her from doing it#OH and i went to my intro to student teaching type class hungover as FUCK#And had to teach kindergarten while fuckin dying#I made a lot of weird choices the fact that I survived to today is a miracle#OH SHIT AND WHEN I WAS AT UCONN#Holy shit my third night there three girls dropped this girl off#In front of my dorm room#who definitely had alcohol poisoning#And I had to babysit this girl who was straight up dying in front of me for TWO HOURS while the RAs dawdled their way up#And then interrogated me even when I had no idea what this girl's name was let alone her deal#When Tracy dumped me over the phone and I had a panic attack in the hallway only to be yanked into the dorm of some random senior#Who was like 'I get you're going through something but you will be written up by the RA if they catch you'#alcohol cw#Jesus Christ I made a fuckton of stupid decision most of which were trying to help other people#And now I'm an elementary school teacher#Which is similar to helping regulate drunk adults#But they tend to be less scary but also less rational
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pearchive0 · 2 years
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25 "Must Have" Objects In Your Car Emergency Kit
The downside is that you simply want more storage space than the survival food path, and if it’s not your regular habit to cook dinner much at house, there’s a limit on how much you can store before risking any waste. If you’re able to wait out an emergency safely on your own property, this behemoth of an emergency package should maintain you and your family sustained for a couple of days. This roundup of survival essentials makes an ideal starter package for those dipping their toes into the world of disaster preparedness, but it could want some supplementation. A tactical backpack with veteran-approved gear for your emergency preparedness. Discussions with well being department employees are confidential. This means that your personal and medical data will be stored non-public and only shared with those who could must know, like your well being care supplier. Mayday offers simple, comprehensive and affordable first aid kits, auto roadside emergency kits and supplies. Mayday is the manufacturer of the Mayday meals bars & water packets. Emergency survival kits are designed to carry a quantity of days' value of emergency supplies and survival gear in a number of classes – meals, ingesting water, warmth, security, tools, and first help. When https://untappedreviews.com/the-lost-ways-review/ , have one other member of your family care on your pets while you are sick. The FDA’s Center for Veterinary Medicine manages outbreak response for animal food and is similarly staffed and ready to reply to incidents of foodborne illness in animals. View the current record of merchandise that meet EPA’s standards for use towards SARS-CoV-2, the purpose for COVID-19. Anyone dealing with, getting ready and serving food ought to always observe protected meals handling procedures, similar to washing hands and surfaces typically. However, one of the most vocal critics of the ‘worst-case scenario’ gang, Michael Mann, has been quoted in the UK nationwide press as describing the future for our children as “dystopian”. When I wrote that unique piece in 2019 I really wasn’t capable of recognize the sheer scale and seriousness of the situation that we’re going through. I didn’t realise that my youngest daughter’s phrases had been part of the call for assist that psychologists are telling us is coming from youngsters everywhere in the world. Be Wealthy & Smart,™ is a private finance present with self-made millionaire Linda P. Jones, America’s Wealth Mentor.™ Learn easy steps that make a big difference to your financial freedom.
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fuckyeahisawthat · 2 months
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Controversial opinion among Dune book fans maybe, but I loved the changes they made to Chani's character. Making her a fedaykin who is already an experienced fighter before Paul arrives was a brilliant choice. Dune Part Two is a war movie, and this puts her at the center of the action, side by side with Paul, and gives her a much more active role than she has in the book.
We got a hint of where things were going in the beginning of Dune Part One. The first thing we ever know about movie Chani is that she's a fighter. She serves as a voice for the Fremen, telling us the story of their struggle from her point of view. I wrote here about the difference this change makes compared to other adaptations of Dune, what a perspective shift it is to have the world of Arrakis introduced not by an outsider, describing it as a dangerous but valuable colonial prize, but by one of its native inhabitants, who tells us before all else that it's beautiful, her home that she's fighting to liberate. I am so, so glad that the second movie followed up on this characterization.
I never found Chani and Paul's love story in the book particularly convincing, because why would this woman, who already has a prominent and respected place in Fremen society, even give the time of day to her deposed would-be colonizer, let alone fall in love and have children with him? Without a compelling reason for Chani to love Paul, she ends up feeling like a prize to be won, and "indigenous culture personified as a woman to be wooed (or conquered) by the colonizing man" is a trope we've seen and don't need to repeat.
But as soon as you tell me it's a barricade romance I get it. Cool cool cool, I know exactly what this relationship is now and it makes sense. Movie Chani doesn't respect or even particularly like Paul when she first meets him, and she doesn't think he's the fulfillment of any prophecy. She comes to respect him, and eventually love him, through his actions. He's brave--sometimes recklessly so. He fights well. He's willing to stick his neck out on the front lines with the other Fremen fighters. He can (after a little help) hack surviving in the harsh desert environment. He's not too proud to learn from others. He seems to genuinely want to be her equal in a common political struggle. All these qualities make sense as things she values.
Fighting side by side as equals is just about the only way I can see movie Chani falling for Paul. And it fits perfectly with the film's pattern of reversals that Paul's capacity for violence would initially be one of the things Chani likes about him, only for her to be repelled later when she sees what he becomes.
And as for Paul, well, he's had people deferring to him his entire life. Someone who doesn't take any shit from him is probably refreshing. He seems to like people (Duncan, Gurney) who challenge him and engage in a little friendly teasing--and aren't afraid to go a few rounds in the sparring ring.
It's easy to speedrun a romance when you're spending all your time together in mortal danger fighting for a shared political cause. Especially if you then start winning in a war your people have been fighting for decades. Are you kidding me? That is the perfect environment for intense battle camaraderie to turn into romantic love, and lust.
It makes sense that this version of Chani never believes Paul is any kind of messiah. Of course a character like movie Chani wouldn't believe in or trust some outside savior to liberate them. She's been working to liberate her own people for years. The more Paul invokes the messianic myth, the more he starts sounding once again like someone who plans to rule over them, and the more uncomfortable Chani becomes. In this way she becomes a foil to Jessica, the two of them representing the choices Paul is pulled between. It's a great way of externalizing the political and philosophical debates that often happen within characters' heads in the book.
And of course this version of Chani would leave Paul at the end of the film. It's not just the personal, emotional betrayal--although that stings. What common cause does she have with someone who just declared himself emperor and is sending her own people off in a war of conquest against others? Given the important role she plays in Dune Messiah, I am super curious to see how they get her back into the story, but girl was so valid for being willing to just gtfo. Given that she has the last shot of the whole movie, I'm sure she'll be back somehow, and I can't wait to see what they do with her character in any future installments.
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spirals-within-spirals · 10 months
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Reason Why Lyrren Is Fucking Awful #1: Travel
Let's start off with an obvious one: Lyrren has no airports. I'm not entirely sure why, though I suspect the eternally raging storm to the south of the region has something to do with it, as does the piss-poor economy.
Flying Pokémon are also a very bad idea unless you have certification for inter-continental flights, the nearest regions are still significant distances away. That leaves ships, and even by water it's not easy - for reasons I hope will be obvious, dedicated passenger ships rarely pass Lyrren. It's one of the most isolated regions in the world after all, and that's not an empty title.
I personally flew to Alola and took a ship from there, but even then it was well over a week at sea to get to my destination. It also presents the issue that it can be difficult to leave on short notice, which I shouldn't need to tell you can be very bad in emergency situations.
If you do go, make an exit strategy. Then make a backup to it. If you're in a hurry you should be able to bribe one of the occasional cargo ships to let you stowaway until the next port, assuming you bring your own food to last the trip.
And yes, that is personal experience speaking. I ended up in fucking Analk.
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thefemalejoker42069 · 9 months
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Was the Barbie movie radical? No. There was nothing “anti-man” about it, in fact it was incredibly kind to men. That, however, has not stopped them from pretending like it straight up unironically advocated for a male genocide. For example:
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Maybe this is wishful thinking, but I firmly believe that the absolute hysteria from so many men that has occurred since its release could make at least a few more women realize that male socialization is not a myth and feminism is absolutely necessary for our survival. Like.. A movie about a toy marketed toward little girls not catering 100% to men is enough to make them go full mask off and advocate for the 19th amendment to be repealed. That’s how insane they’re being about this. Their reaction to this movie is a great example of what feminists mean when we say that males are socialized to believe the world must cater to them and their interests alone, and nothing makes them more mad than when a woman tries to challenge that. I just really hope women are paying attention to this and digging deeper into why they’re behaving this way.
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lilac-witch · 3 months
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Aesthete - Azriel x reader
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Summary: Azriel hates his hands, Y/n loves them. Meaning: "one having or affecting sensitivity to the beautiful, especially art" Word Count: 389 Warnings: None
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"I love your hands."
Azriel's eyes moved from the book in his hands to the female sitting across from him. She wasn't looking at him, her eyes focused solely on her own book.
Moments passed, and Azriel remained silent, unable to find the correct words to say. It was as though the air had been ripped from his lungs.
Y/n lifted her head to find him staring at her, his hazel eyes wide with shock and mouth slightly ajar.
"What's that look for?" Y/n asked with a grin, slowly shutting the book in her hands.
Azriel's jaw bobbed, but no words left his mouth.
"Cat got your tongue Az?"
"You said you loved my hands..."
Azriel felt as though he was a toddler, repeating the words he heard others saying. But the concept that this female could even stand to look at his hands, let alone love them, had him feeling at odds with himself.
He watched as Y/n tilted her head to the side, nose scrunched in confusion.
"Why wouldn't I love your hands?"
"They're hideous. They aren't soft like yours, and the scars..."
"I love your hands, Azriel, because they represent your strength. They represent the male who survived hate and anguish, and overcame all the challenges thrown his way."
Azriel felt water line his eyes, the tears threatening to fall down his cheeks as his mate continued.
"I love your hands because they bring me joy. Your hands hold the flowers you bring me whenever you return home from a mission. It's your hands that wipe away my tears when I'm sad. It's your hands that mine seek underneath the table during family dinners."
Azriel could only attempt to not gape at his mate, at the comforting words that left her perfect mouth.
"I love your hands because there isn't a part of you that I don't love," she finished, pushing herself up from her chair.
Azriel tracked her movements around the table, shifting his sitting position to accommodate her weight as she sat in his lap.
Her hands took his in her own, thumbs rubbing gently over his scars before she lifted his hands to her mouth, placing soft kisses upon the skin.
Her eyes met his, blazing with love and admiration, and in that moment, Azriel had never loved her more.
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Hi everyone! I hope you enjoyed this post. It's the first of many to come. Please feel free to send me requests and post comments :) Also, please bear with me. I'm a full-time student so there may be times where posting isn't so consistent. But anyway, until next time ;)
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spacebarbarianweird · 2 months
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Hi! I absolutely love your headcannons!! Would it be possible for me to request sick Astarion? Or Astarion with a sick Tav? :)
Hi! Thank you for your request! I think I can do both!
Masterlist
Headcanons
Caring for their sick partner
Astarion takes care of you
He isn't a nurturing type.
He doesn't really care about himself let alone someone else!
Besides, it's not like he used to hang out with mortals a lot.
During your post-game adventures, you end in the far north in the middle of winter.
Astarion doesn't feel cold, but he notices you feel uncomfortable near him - his body is cold, and he steals the heat you need so much.
It causes tension between you two - one of the first challenges for you as a couple.
During a fight, you fall through the ice and almost die in the dark cold waters.
Astarion saves you but the damage is done.
You are severely sick.
Astarion freaks out.
You are dying in his arms.
He has to save you. He won't lose you.
Astarion manages to dress you in dry and warm clothes. He leaves you by the fire for a bit to hunt - you need food, and Astarion needs blood to warm you.
Then, when you stabilize, he carries you to the closest village and gives you all the money you've earned in your travels for a room in the inn.
He spoon-feeds you and wraps you in the warmest blankets.
Sometimes you pout, refusing to take one more bitter medicine, but he can't take this nonsense - you are going to get better. Period.
When you wake up, still in fever, Astarion is always near. Either wrapping you with his blood-warm body or with his ear on your chest as if he was afraid your heart was going to stop at any given moment.
As the spring comes, you finally get better. Astarion gives you a bath, and you realize how itchy and sweaty your body is.
Then he lashes at you, of course.
You were reckless, you were risking yourself. How could you?
But you know he speaks out of fear, and you comfort him, promising to never put yourself in danger without a need.
You take care of Astarion
If you weren't a nurturing type, you wouldn't end up with Astarion.
The man needs help and care, something he never had.
You comfort him after the nightmares and kiss away his tears.
He doesn't need to be cared for physically - once the tadpole is removed, he regenerates, and it's impossible to wound him.
But he is a mental wreck who can have a meltdown over a trigger word or a cruel flashback after an innocent action.
But he is far from invincible.
He is being reckless and ends up surrounded by monster hunters.
They chain him in silver and leave him helpless on the ground to see the sun.
You manage to come to the rescue - and murder all three of them.
But as you fight, the sun rises, and it burns Astarion.
It's almost too late for him when you set him free and drag him to the shadows.
The regeneration is slowed down - the burns are as bad as if he survived a fire.
You give him blood. All you can do without killing yourself.
The assault causes one of the worst setbacks in his healing process.
Astarion is almost catatonic - curling in the darkest corner of the room in the fetal position.
You can only guess what prison his tortured mind is locked in.
You talk to him. Hug him. Takes care of his hair. Caress his back.
Days become weeks, weeks become months - and one evening Astarion is finally back.
He wraps his hand around you and nuzzles your collarbone.
By the end of the night, Astarion is his true self again, ready for everything freedom has to offer.
"I was there, in the tomb," he confesses. "I was locked there, in the dark, and all my life looked like a feverish dream."
"I am here, love," you say. "I will always be here for you."
You pretend you don't see his tears as you say it.
--
Tag list
@tugoslovenka @marcynomercy @wintersire @vixstarria @not-so-lost-after-all @ashiro20 @theearthsfinalconfession @herstxrgirl @starlight-ipomoea @micropoe10 @astarion-imagine-archive @veillsar @elora-the-slutty-songstress @fayeriess @lumienyx @tallymonster @caitlincat-95 @tragedybunny @valeprati @lynnlovesthestars @marina-and-the-memes @waking-electric @ayselluna @connorsui @asterordinary @darkarchangel96 @locallegume @brainfullofhotsauce @coffeeanddonutscafe @my-queen-rhaenyra-targaryen @queenofthespacesquids @ednaaa-04 @dajeong
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villainsidestep · 14 days
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self care is going “okay but lmao what if the farm managed a factory reset wouldn’t that be funny”
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ayselluna · 26 days
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Spawn Astarion Recommendations!
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So I heard you guys want Spawn Astarion Recommendations too! I heard you :) Apologies if it took awhile it got hard to compile everything I read.
I honestly have read more one shots Spawn Astarion than series tbh. but here are some series I love! These are Astarion x Tav / You / OCs following the story from the game! I'll be happy to make another list for AU's! Another Ascended list is on the way too~ :))
I DEFINITELY RECOMMEND FOLLOWING THESE WRITERS TOO as they have really great HCs and One Shots!
The Arrangement by @fangswbenefits - This is one of the first ones I've read and how she wrote Astarion is just so ASTARION! The lines, the slow burn and the smut are exquisite as hell. I do suggest reading her oneshots too! Her smuts are so good I suggest reading it ALONE. XD ONGOING!
The Fangs Between Us by @feyascorner - Not your typical Lovey-dovey Astarion and Tav. Astarion actually felt betrayed and actually tried killing you! Can love still blossom? is it still there? Would you guys even be friends?! So much angst and but oh so goooood! ONGOING!
Shadows of the Past by @pastshadowsff-blog / PallidMoon - What's an Astarion story w/o the angst? I would definitely be devastated the moment Astarion left me! The process of healing and loving, the confrontations here are soooo on point! Have a good gale on the side too~ ONGOING!
Love at First Knife by @bg-brainrot - DEFINITELY A FAVORITE! Aside from the romance from Astarion and TAV you get the WHOLE GANG TOO! I'm a sucker on everything on this series! I can't count how many times I've re-read this while I wait for my other fics to update. ONGOING? I'm not sure but it gets updated!
When He’s all but Forgotten How to Love Again by @bg-brainrot - okay another one from the same author, at this point just read everything!! okay, but what if TAV died and got reincarnated?! If you got an elf TAV this is definitely one for the books! I LOOOOVE this one a lot. Getting your memories back and seeking your lover out, would it be the same? Would he even remember you?! Surely he will right?! but what if he don't? hmmmm READ IT! ONGOING!
Astarion Talks In His Sleep by  @littlejuicebox - This is a short series but this was just memorable coz WE'LL LOVE EVERYTHING in it. It's one of the happy endings you'd totally wish for and how this story got me gasping and giddy was just chef's kiss! You'll love her DADSTARION series too! I LOVE THIS FAMILY A LOT. :))
Cursed To Put My Hands On Everything by @maladaptive-menace - I recently found this and I got hook immediately on the concept! I also love the titles on this series, as the title says~ :)) So imagine you're doing your mundane things IRL and one tiring night you found yourself Isekaid IN the GAME?! You know you're effed up, how would you survive?! well at least you got your dream come true of meeting the gang in the flesh…specially the Pale Elf~ ONGOING!
Winter Holiday Challenge Fills by @justporo - So this is an all fluff from the Winter Holidays! I know it's not christmas anymore but if you missed it during that time who cares?! READ IT! Get all the fluffiness you need from this series! Check that full masterlist on their profile too while you're at it~ :)) FINISHED!
The Currents of Destiny by @lendeah - You and Astarion fights after he didn't go with the Ascension, left and scorn you to die screaming! But what if he sees all the what if that could happen?! Would his decision stay the same? FINISHED!
An Adventure in Making a Life by @redlittlefoxari - okay something different but maybe a PREGNANCY fic anyone? :D This was one of the fastest story I binged! You both just learned you're pregnant but an invitation from a friend comes forth! Maybe keep it a surprise for the gang? How would this pregnancy on the road takes you? ALSOOOO FREAKING LOVIING HUSBAND ASTARION UGGHH i can't~
I have more authors to recommend but we'll keep this list for now! I urge you to follow these authors too and check their other works.
Let me know if you guys are up for more recommendations! I have more to share! <3 Hope you enjoy reading them as I did! More reading buddies!
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deathbxnny · 2 days
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hihi!! may I req ratio,aventurine and wriothesley with a teen!reader who is getting bullied badly?
reader is a student in ratios, the youngest IPC employee in aventurines and the youngest prisoner in wriothesleys
thank youu
Hello there, Anon!! I absolutely love this idea, so thank you for the request, and I hope you'll like this!!<33
Content: Some descriptions of bullying!!, teen reader, platonic relationships, fluff, hurt/comfort, some angst, sfw
Reader has no set pronouns!!
((Not fully proofread))
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》WRIOTHESLEY
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Wriothesley knew from the start that you'd have a rough time here. You were very young and not the strongest he had seen either. You were akin to a scared and confused child due to your sentencing having been rather... unfair, in his own opinion. You reminded him of himself when he first arrived down here, and so, he took it upon himself to watch over you from afar until you've settled in properly.
However, as he had perhaps expected, people didn't go easy on you. You were teased and bullied, and some much older inmates were going as far as taking your hard earned tokens or food. And whilst some say that it was the survival of the fittest down here, Wriothesley didn't adhere to that anymore. Just because they were criminals didn't mean that they had to be so uncivilized in a place they had to now call home for most likely life.
And so, he eventually put a stop to it by being a little "rough" himself with the way he worded his orders for people to leave you alone. You were taken under his wing completely afterward, as he had hope that you'd perhaps make it out after all one day and lead a much better life than he could.
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》AVENTURINE
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Aventurine immideatly took notice of the way some older IPC agents picked on you. You were the youngest there, maybe even a little younger than he was when he was first taken in, and it was quite obvious that you were therefore an easy target. He tried keeping an eye on you as much as he could until he eventually just put in the request to be the one to mentor you.
He quickly made sure to always have you at his side whenever you were doing business for the IPC with coworkers. It made things alot easier regarding all the teasing and bullying, but it took alot out of him to not get annoyed whenever someone made a sly comment towards you.
Aventurine keeps you safe and helps you build your confidence up by letting you speak your mind and take over challenging jobs. He would also absolutely pull some strings to gain you more respect amongst your peers if needed, ofcourse.
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》DR. RATIO
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Dr. Ratio was keeping his eyes on you from the start during his classes, although it did take him moment to notice the bullying. You were always a very reserved and quiet child, so he usually left you alone as long as you paid attention in class and did your homework. But when your grades began to dramatically decline, he knew something must've been going on with you.
And so he decided to take alot longer when packing his things after class ended. He acted like he wasn't really paying attention to anyone anymore either, which is how he finally caught your bullies picking on you. To say that he was displeased would be an understatement. He didn't tolerate bullying in his class and made sure to place all of your bullies in detention the moment he could.
Dr. Ratio saw it as important for you to continue your studies even after what happened, but this time in private sessions away from the main classes until you felt safe again. He might be strict and stern at times, but ultimately he just wants the best for you and makes sure you know that.
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Alrighttt, I hope this was okay, Anon, and thank you again for your request!!<33
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tinyavenuesailor · 1 year
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Crack Fic! Where Everyone thinks Merlin is the reasonable one.
Everyone loves Merlin and thinks he’s the sweetest person, who couldn’t hurt a fly. So, they’re all annoyed when they see how Arthur treats him. The King is constantly overloading his manservant with work, ordering him to do massive tasks and coming up with ridiculous excuses to keep Merlin from taking a break. So, the knights and others constantly try to find ways to pull Merlin away from Arthur’s side and give him a break but Arthur always finds a way to mess up their plans.
Gwen and the other maids sometimes try to help Merlin with his chores
Gwen: Arthur you can’t actually expect Merlin to clean the entire throne room by himself
Arthur: *shrugs* Yes. I’m hardly asking him much
Gwen: It usually takes five maids to thoroughly clean the throne room. It’s ridiculous to ask one person to do so much work and then, to place Lancelot as a guard to make sure none of us can help him. 
Arthur: Lancelot wouldn’t have to guard anything if you all weren’t so ready to disobey my orders. I said Merlin will clean the throne room ALONE and that is final
Gwen: I never knew you could be such a cruel person and to Merlin of all people
*Gwen storms off*
Gwaine, Leon, Percival, Elyan and some of the other knights try to steal Merlin away to the tavern to relax
Gwaine: Come on Princess. I’m sure you can survive one night without Merlin 
*Gwaine tries to pull Merlin to their side but Arthur grabs hold of Merlin and pulls him back*
Arthur: Need I remind you, Merlin is my manservant and doesn’t have time to play around. He still has very important duties to complete
Elyan: What could he possibly have to do at this time? Most servants have gone home for the day?
Arthur: Well Merlin is the King’s manservant as I keep reminding you and still have very important things to do
Gwaine: Like what?
Arthur: *pauses* For one, he needs to clean the mess he made in the closet
The knights: *trying to process the bullshit Arthur just told them* 
Arthur: *crossing his arms, 100% serious, daring them to challenge him*
Merlin: It’s fine guys really, probably next time *pulling Arthur and himself back into Arthur’s chambers and locking the door*
Or when something terrible happens to Merlin like the time he got kidnapped and everyone went into full panic
Arthur: *staring hard at Lance* Merlin’s been kidnapped?
Elyan: They ambushed us out of nowhere and before we knew it they were off with him.
Leon: Don’t worry sire, I’ll gather a search party immediately to have him found.
Gwaine: We’ll make them sorry they ever thought to mess with our Merlin
Arthur: *holding up a finger and turning to Lance again* Merlin’s been kidnapped?
Lance: ..... That is the story
Gwaine: Princess, have you not been listening. We need to hurry every second counts. 
Arthur: I heard, just wondering why he couldn’t have chosen a better day to get himself kidnapped
*Everyone gawks at Arthur in disbelief*
Basically, everyone thinks that Arthur doesn’t appreciate Merlin and that their cinnamon roll deserves better and formed a protection squad to help Merlin get the treatment he deserves.
Meanwhile in Reality....
Arthur knows about Merlin’s magic. He is fully aware of how powerful Merlin is and finally sees that his manservant isn’t an idiot. He’s just a bloody madman.
===In the throne room=== 
*Arthur and Merlin both staring at a dark purple swirling vortex on the floor*
Arthur: *takes a deep breath* Merlin, why is there a hole in my throne room?
Merlin: Well, it's not a hole. It’s a sort of gateway to the dark dimension.
Arthur: Oh, okay. Why is there a gateway to the dark dimension in my throne room?
Merlin: ..... I can fix it
Lancelot: Arthur, I heard you- *looks down at the menacing purple gateway on the floor and then back to Arthur and Merlin* 
Lancelot: Should I go guard the door?
===After Gwaine, Elyan and Percival tried to take Merlin out for drinks===
Merlin: You know we both could use a break. I am a bit hungry. Been a while since I had a drink too
Arthur: Well maybe, we can join them after you explain why my Uncle is tied up in my closet
*Arthur opens his closet doors revealing a tied-up and gagged Agravaine making muffled noise*
Merlin: You told me to get evidence that he was working with Morgana
Arthur: And your solution to that was to kidnap him?
Merlin: What better way to hear it than from the man himself? 
Arthur: What’s going to happen when people realize he’s missing
Merlin: Don’t worry, one memory wipe spell and he’ll be back tomorrow in his chambers like nothing ever happened
Arthur: You told me those spells were dangerous
Merlin: *laughs* Well, yeah, I’m not using it on us
Agravaine: *making muffled and panicked pleads to Arthur*
Lancelot: Sorry, Arthur, Gaius told me that Merlin needed m- *sees a tied-up Agravaine* 
Lancelot: *nods* I’ll go stand guard
=== Arthur, the first to find Merlin after his “kidnapping” ===
Arthur: *folds his arms and looks behind his manservant to see a trail of bodies* Kidnapped?
Merlin: Well they did try to kidnap me. I just decided not to resist. 
Arthur: *sighs* Is everyone dead?
Merlin: I was supposed to leave someone alive?
Arthur: *rolls his eyes* Come before I have to explain how my “innocent”, “weak” manservant took out a group of mercenaries.
Lancelot: *already standing guard* 
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