#assholes I hate you and die ❤️

[cattatoir]

I think tumblr should pay ME every time they make me see some terf shit

#cmo's log #how am I supposed to know the posts I’m liking are terf bitches if the post isn’t about that or tagged. #I’m just out here like yes misogyny is bad! #how am I supposed to know some of you ducking assholes are out there trapping these posts like you’re a fucking narnia portal #you see it and it’s like misogyny bad! but then you go through it and it’s actually no we like misogyny just differently :) #assholes I hate you and die ❤️

[lord-shitbox]

Good morning all. Took a successful 10minutr shower tha woke me up pleasantly and also didn't forget my meds (they're evil though). Watching nuramago anime is insane I have all the manga parts with gozu and mezu in them basically memorized so I can easily compare scenes and dialogue to the canon panels. Using my twisted fucking cycle path mind. The anime is not good

#shitboxposting #i think ghe target demographic for s1 is lowwr than the s2 target so everything is both more drawn out and more sanitized. hate that #theres about twice as many frames with gozu abd mezu in them but theyre not VERY GOOD ONES #they did make gozu stabbing tsurara in the foot Slightly more asshole ❤️❤️❤️❤️ but i have a feeling they changed his dialogue. #ill havr to rewatch it when i get home to make sure they didnt rewrite critical personality showing dialogue. because i think they did #he does Not care about 'codes' of honor he carss about Im Fucking Better Than You Woman. Die

[praisethegabs]

OLDER

leon kennedy x reader

synopsis: he's getting older, and he knows that. not believing in luck or in love, leon finds himself in a position of complete misfortune. he convinced himself he's not worthy of love, but that changes when he meets you.

warnings: angst with fluff ending, age gap, leon is very insecure about his age and the reader. strangers to lovers, mentions of smut, ptsd, alcoholism, depression, suicidal thoughts. reader is very delicate, kind, and patient. there's parts from the vendetta book and a few scenes from re6. it starts with re6!leon and ends with di!leon

word count: 15k

a/n: guess who's back? to celebrate the 1 year re4r anniversary, I decided to post this one shot I was working for almost two months. I'm into my angst era again. also i wrote this based on this analysis i read, which made me think about the broken part of leon for a while, also this fic contains part of the vendetta book. feel free to leave comments, reblogs, tips, or positive critics. they're always very welcome ❤️

I. THE WEIGHT ON HIS SHOULDERS

Life can be a bitch sometimes.

This is what he says to himself when he finishes another bottle of whiskey. Every day, when he opens his eyes, he tries to stay positive, hoping his day will be different from his usual schedule; in the end, it is always the same bullshit. Over and over again. No apparent ending; always his solitude. 

But someday it must end, right? He can’t be fighting B.O.W.'s for the rest of his life, can he? Maybe someday he’ll finally settle down and have a peaceful day. Maybe, on this day, his nightmares will stop, and if he’s lucky, he’ll sleep for the entire night. No one can blame him for dreaming of a perfect life, and no one can take this from him. 

The government made him their slave, their deadly pet that follows and obeys every rule and command, and forced him to risk his neck almost every week to keep their country safe. What a bunch of assholes, he thinks to himself. Thing is, Leon hates himself for what he was forced to become. 

There is so much pain. So much suffering. He only wanted to be a cop — nothing more than that. He wanted to deal with simple things — not bioterrorists ready to blow up the entire world, not grotesque mutations that defy the natural order of things. Certainly, if he had a choice to go back and change that night, he wouldn’t go to Raccoon City. He would've stayed in his cheap hotel room; he would have obeyed Marvin’s orders to not go in there. 

But now he’s something else. The rookie cop who had to survive that night died. He can’t even recognize himself anymore, and sometimes, he blames himself for it. No more than he blames the government for it; if he could go back… 

His days are filled with this emptiness — the sensation that he might never see his happy ending. Ada? Yeah, sure. He knows he can’t trust her, and God knows where she is or what she’s doing. He was so naive to fall for her like he did. While on his free day out of the office, he finds himself with a certain envy of happy couples. He can’t stop thinking: why can’t he have the same? Why can’t he be happy for once?

Getting older sucks. At this point, Leon thinks and has already convinced himself that he doesn’t belong to anyone and that he won’t be able to have someone. To experience love and being loved, he wants to be wanted. He’s getting older and still doesn't have anyone by his side. That’s the price he pays for having this life, and he still blames the government for taking it from him. He doesn’t remember the last time he actually felt something for someone, and at this moment of his life, it doesn’t matter to him anymore. Leon had already accepted the fact that he'd die alone. Maybe he’ll get a cat to keep him company. Since he’s not much of a dog person since Raccoon City, maybe he’ll name her a cute name; who knows? That’s probably the closest he’ll get to having something waiting for him at home. 

Leon doesn’t remember the last time he actually felt happy. Since Raccoon City, he doesn't know what happiness means, and sometimes, on very rare occasions, he envies people around him. He feels like his entire life has no purpose and no meaning, and he’s completely faded to emptiness, to a sad existence based on killing bioweapons and serving his country. Does he feel proud about it? No, he doesn’t. 

It’s been a very long time since Leon felt pride. That feeling died and is now buried in the remains of Raccoon City, inside that police station where his life turned upside down. Now he’s only an empty shell of what he used to be. He’s rotting inside, craving something he knows he can’t have, and there’s nothing but a void inside him, consuming every inch of him. 

After serving his country for years, he started to get used to the idea that maybe he wasn’t made for a happy ending, and he shouldn’t bother with such things. He can’t afford the luxury of being with someone, because it means being vulnerable, and it also means he would have to open himself to things he swore he would never feel again. No, thank you. 

Things at work aren’t exactly the best, either. Years ago, Leon started to question himself about whether the government cared about their people, especially the ones he had to kill in order to save others. Leon couldn’t forget what happened in Spain — the entire village he was forced to end so he wouldn’t die. Perhaps they could’ve saved them; possibly they could’ve had a chance; maybe if… and this is where he dozes off thinking about the infinite possibilities. 

After what happened in Raccoon City, Leon knew he had lost faith. He knew things would never be the same after everything he saw that day. Sometimes, he finds himself thinking about Annette and William Birkin. He feels his body shivering when he remembers he had to fight for his life, clinging to something bigger than him. Survival. 

II. RINSE AND REPEAT

He has no social skills, and doesn't know how to interact with people anymore. It all feels weird and uncomfortable, and it makes him feel terrible. Sometimes he feels like he’s stuck in time and can’t have a proper conversation with someone normal. The worst part of his life is that he feels he’s carrying a weight on his shoulders that it wasn’t supposed to be his in the first place. He has the weight of the world with him, and there is no one to help him through it. Life made him depressed, cold and distant. Life has built him this way; he's shaped himself into something he’s not, and he can’t find himself. He’s lost. 

Leon can’t stop having nightmares about Raccoon City.

At this point, he just accepted that they wouldn't go away. It feels like he’s trapped inside his own mind, and there’s no turning back. Sometimes at night, he keeps looking at his ceiling imagining a different life, where he was a cop and happy. Usually, his nightmares are so dark and deep that when he wakes up, he finds solace in the sunlight, feeling relieved that he survived another night. When he doesn't sleep, when he’s too scared to close his eyes, he cries quietly, protected by the walls of his room, searching for assurance and a promise that everything will be fine. It doesn’t always work, but now he knows he can control his fears, and somehow, it helps him feel safe.

This time, his mission nearly got him killed. His entire body was full of bruises and wounds, and every part of him hurt. He felt his body swallowing a little, and he felt terrible again. He has blood under his nails, and he washes himself at least three times to make sure there’s nothing more on him than the burden of being a slave for the government.

Leon is paranoid; he can’t stand the fact that he has blood on his hands. If he sees a spot, he’ll clean it until there’s nothing left, and maybe he’s now too obsessed with the idea of being clean. It makes him feel sick to the bones, because he knows what he does and what it means. He knows that this guilt won’t be washed away like the blood on his hands, and certainly won’t get away from his head like it does from his clothes whenever he launders them. It’s a pretty shitty routine, but he’s used to it. 

Now he finds himself in a very dark place; he can’t eat without feeling guilty. He can’t do the basics of his chores because he can’t stop thinking about his life, regretting every decision he made. Everything he does seems mechanical, like he’s repeating the process over and over again, a perfect killing machine that has no one to care about. On Fridays, he finds himself sitting on his couch, in complete silence, holding an empty bottle. He knows he can’t drown himself in alcohol, no matter how much he wants it or how tempting it sounds, because the liquid doesn’t affect him anymore. It doesn't make the pain go away or silence the horrors he saw during his life. 

After three weeks inside his house, locked inside his room, Leon woke up with a strange feeling inside his chest. Something was telling him that this day would be different, like a big change would happen. For the first time in weeks, he decided to leave his place for a simple walk. He could do that; he could walk into the market and buy some real food or maybe get a haircut. He felt that he was able to allow himself to have an ordinary day. 

After taking a long shower, Leon decided to wear cozy and comfortable clothes. He was so used to his brutal routine that he almost forgot what it was like to have a normal day, but this time, he was willing to try something different. He took a deep breath before leaving his house, and when he felt the soft, cold breeze reaching his skin, he knew he could do that.

Step by step, Leon found himself walking towards the market, even enjoying the lovely view he had from his neighborhood. He doesn’t remember it to be so… gray. Sure, he knows what winter is, but he doesn’t remember the last time he actually stayed at his home during the winter. His lips turn into a small smirk, and he thinks how silly he is. When he reaches the small market, which is more of a store, he walks slowly, looking at what he might be buying - he’s done with frozen food. He stops at the veggie section and keeps looking at it, confused. 

“These aren’t fresh” a sweet voice is enough to wake him up from his trance. He looks in that direction, and all he sees is you.

“How can you tell that?” he asks you in visible confusion, which makes you smile. And that smile was enough to sparkle something oddly inside him. 

“Color, smell, texture,” you explained, still smiling and showing him a fresh vegetable. “This one is fresh."

"Thanks,” Leon replied awkwardly, taking the vegetable from your hand and placing it in his basket.

“You don’t come here very often. I know almost everyone who comes to buy food here,” you said next, glancing at him with curiosity. 

“I… have a busy schedule,” he says, still sounding awkward.

“Really? Well, you should definitely take some time to buy healthy food. I’m pretty sure you do a lot of workouts to keep your body in shape” you giggle, noticing the size of his muscles, which makes his face turn red.

“I’ll keep that in mind” Leon managed to say, although he wanted to dissipate from Earth.

“I can help with that” you suddenly said, analyzing him more carefully.

“With what?” Leon frowned, already feeling his heart beating ten times faster.

“I noticed you’re having difficulty with your right arm, which makes me think you got it hurt. If you’re planning to buy more, I can help with your bags” you offered, very polite and kind, catching him by surprise. 

“Thanks” Leon says, finding himself smiling, which is unusual. 

At first, having some company after so much time alone made him think it was strange. He wasn’t feeling ready to have a small conversation, but you didn’t seem bothered. In fact, you were enjoying walking to this stranger's house in complete silence. Fifteen minutes later, you were in front of his house in an awkward silence between the two of you. 

“I guess this is it” you smiled at him, and Leon found himself lost in your smile. 

“Yeah. Thank you” he said for the fifth time, which made you giggle a little. 

“Anything for a customer” you said to him, giving him his bags. “My parents are the owners, so…”

“You don’t seem too old” he said, and after a second, he felt more weird. “I mean…”

“Nah, it’s ok. This isn’t the first time people say I'm younger than I look”. You smiled again, thinking that this old man was very silly and cute. “I’m 25, don’t worry”

“I’m Leon, by the way” He finally says his name to you, stretching his hand in a very educated way.

“Nice to meet you, Leon” you said before shaking his hand. 

Leon took at least three weeks to return to the market. 

His initial thoughts about you were that he definitely felt weird in your presence. Maybe he felt that way because of his lack of social skills and because he really sucks when the subject is social conversation. He caught himself thinking too hard about the visual and evident contrast between the two of you; you were young, bright and smart, with a great future ahead of you, and plus, you came from a loving family. Leon, on the other hand, was an orphan used and abused by the government, their pet and a man who only knew pain and brutality. 

However, you were the first friendly face he saw after years. The way you were smiling and giggling at his awkward answers, it definitely made him feel something he thought he would never feel again. It was like you found the rookie cop inside him, and despite the fact that he barely said something, he felt normal around you. And that was more than enough. How could it happen so fast? 

“How can I help you?” you said before noticing it was him. “Oh, hi” 

“Hi” Leon is welcomed by that smile of yours. “I… um…”

“You came to buy more veggies?” you ask, still smiling at him. You think it’s cute to see him without any words. 

“No… I just came because I’m looking for food seasoning” Leon said, his face slightly turning red. “I’m trying new recipes, so…” 

“Yeah? What have you been trying?” you ask with sudden enthusiasm, leading him to the part with seasonings. 

“Nothing too risky” he answers vaguely, following you closely.

“What kind of seasonings do you like?” You turn back to face him as you show him the shelves with different types of seasonings. 

“I’m more into spicy flavors” Leon tells you, his attention going to the shelves. 

“It suits you” you said, giving him some space. You saw him smiling again. 

"How does spicy seasoning suit me?” he asks with a hint of curiosity. 

“You might think I’m weird, but… seeing from outside, you look like someone with a rough agenda and, apparently, whatever you do is dangerous. Personally, I think you suit perfectly spicy things” you said, hoping it would make sense. 

“I think I got your point,” Leon said, and then he found himself smiling for the second time. 

“Lucky me, right?” you laugh, walking back to the cashier. “Is this all for today?”

“Yeah, I guess it is,” Leon nods, grabbing his wallet to pay for the seasonings. 

“How’s your arm?” you ask, taking his money and counting it. 

“It's better. I had to take a few painkillers, but it’s definitely better” he said, avoiding you for a few moments. 

“That’s great. I know a few herbs to help with the pain” you said, giving him the change from his purchase. 

“How so?” Leon asks with another hint of curiosity. 

“A great sorcerer doesn’t reveal her secrets” you wink playfully at him. “You need to earn that, soldier” 

“And how could I earn your secrets, great sorcerer?” Leon asks, enjoying your playful mood. 

“Maybe you can invite me for dinner and show me your cooking skills” you shake your shoulders and, for the second time, catching him by surprise. 

“You would love that, wouldn't you?” Leon said, and a slight smirk appeared on his lips. 

“Who knows?” You wink playfully at him, with another suggestive smile on your lips. 

The world has gone to hell, Leon thinks to himself. 

He starts to contemplate everything that has happened to him. When did this madness begin? It was back in Raccoon City? Oh, no. It is way older than that. Maybe his collapse started when his family died, and he was left an orphan; what happened in Raccoon City wasn’t really the beginning of his nightmare. It was the cherry on top of the torments that would become his life. 

Now that he’s coming back home from another mission, he can’t stop thinking how his life could’ve been if Umbrella had never happened. If those bioweapons were never created, defying every natural order. He looks outside his window, and he just can’t stop blaming himself for Tall Oaks. 

What has become of this world? Leon thinks. Where did I go wrong? 

His life is an entire mistake. It just goes on and on. His family first, then Raccoon City. Tricell, Los Illuminados, Uroboros and, finally, that nightmare at Tall Oaks. Leon takes a deep breath. He feels his hands shaking and closes his eyes, forcing himself to forget. How silly he is!

The future is a hell that’s only getting worse. 

III. THE PAIN OF REMEMBERING

You weren't expecting Leon to find the note with your number that you left on his seasonings, the same way you weren't expecting him to call you.

However, something about him got your attention the minute he stepped foot inside the store. He wasn't like anything you had seen before; he was definitely something else. 

After almost four weeks since the last time you saw him, you got a call from an unknown number. It was pretty late at night, but your curiosity won the battle within you, and you had to pick up the phone. With a groggy voice of sleep, you saw the number and frowned.

“Hello?” You ask, followed by a big yawning. It was one in the morning. 

“Hi… um, it's Leon” he says with some urgency, to which you jump from your bed. “I'm sorry to wake you up” 

“No, don't worry. I wasn't sleeping” you lied, forcing yourself not to yawn again. 

“I know it's late, but… I was thinking about that dinner…” he says, sounding somehow hopeful. “Maybe you could come later and… talk?” 

“Yeah, sure. Can you pick me up?” You ask him, and a smile appears on your lips as you answer him. 

“Of course. At seven?” 

“At seven, it is,” you smiled again. 

As soon as the call ended, he was in complete shock. For some reason, Leon felt you wouldn’t accept his invitation, especially after being alone for so long. His heart was beating faster inside his chest, and he had to remind himself that it was just a casual date between… two friends? Could you possibly be his friend? 

Leon felt anxious, something he only felt when he was on his missions. 

Suddenly, the mere thought of having you at his home with him sounded terrifying. He felt like it would end in a complete disaster, and you wouldn’t see him ever again. Then, Leon had to stop and calm himself down, knowing it was his trauma trying to get the best of him. After everything he went through in his life, being able to trust someone proved to be a difficult task. He felt scared, and his mind was racing with thousands of different thoughts, each worse than the other. 

Betrayal is the word that defines Leon. 

He was betrayed before and multiple times, which left him with a lot of insecurities and traumas to the point he feels that he can’t trust anyone, which led to another set of insecurities. Leon feels that he isn’t enough anymore, that he can’t provide the proper attention someone might need from him, and that he can’t be in a relationship because of his problems. The truth is, he can’t be in a relationship until he leaves his trauma behind, and he knows it. That’s the easy part, but the hard one is how to let it go. 

Later that day, Leon finally had the courage to clean his house. He needed some motivation to get rid of his depression, and nothing was better than finally allowing himself to have some company besides his solitude. His house smelled pretty good, everything was clean, and his furniture was even shining. He opened the curtains, and the sunlight entered his living room. He took a deep breath with the fresh air that came inside, and smiled, feeling somehow proud and happy. 

At seven, you were waiting outside the store, scrolling through your phone, when you saw Leon approaching on his motorcycle. You were gorgeous, wearing a beautiful dress and covered by a black leather jacket — the perfect contrast that suited you well. Leon was completely mesmerized by the sight of you - so beautiful, he thought. 

“Hey, there” you waved at him as he parked next to you. 

“Hi,” Leon replies, sounding embarrassed. “You look beautiful”

“You too, handsome” you said playfully, taking the helmet from his hand and sitting behind him, your hands holding him tight. You didn’t notice the small blush on his cheeks. 

"Are you okay back there?” Leon asks you, making sure you were fine before starting the engines. 

“Yeah, I’m fine” you said, nodding your head, and smiling when he started to drive his bike to his place. 

You two didn’t take long enough to reach his place. Leon offered you his hand so you had support to get out of his bike, and he even opened the front door for you. He led you inside his house, and everything inside was enough to show you the kind of man he was; his home was big, but simple. He had a lot of comfort there, but it seemed like he didn't spend much time at his place. You saw some photos at the fireplace, a few when he was younger, at some training camp with his possible friends. 

“How old were you when you took these?” you asked him with curiosity. 

“I was twenty-one” he said, grabbing the wine and the glasses. 

“So young” you whispered, noticing that in some pictures, he was sad. 

Leon took another deep breath. Why did this have to be so difficult? Why couldn’t he be just normal for once? Why did everything have to happen to him? You were standing there, so gracefully, observing his old photographs, so young and full of life, with no baggage with you. Someone actually happy and alive. If you knew how much he envies this. 

“People say that our eyes are the windows to our soul” you turn to face him, noticing his sudden silence. “Yours are so sad and broken… what happened to your neck?”

Instinctively, his hand reaches his neck, and Leon feels the bandage perfectly secured on his skin, with a small spot of blood. Gladly, it was enough to change the subject, because he was shocked enough by what you said about his broken soul. If you only knew. 

“I, um… got hurt on my job. It’s nothing.” Leon tries to avoid speaking about his past. 

“It seems pretty bad” you step closer to him, your hand gently touching his bandage. 

“It’s nothing… trust me” Leon smiles weakly, looking down. His heart is beating so fast inside his chest that he could explode any time. “I’m fine” 

“Then explain why you are so nervous around me” you whispered, now softly touching his cheek. 

Leon felt he stopped breathing, like his lungs decided to leave him alone and deal with the matter himself; how powerful your touch felt. It was enough to break every wall he built around himself for years; it was enough to make him break. And it was only a soft and kind touch. He slowly closed his eyes, his breath becoming normal again, and he allowed himself to just feel it. 

“I don’t know what on earth happened to you…” your voice is full of kindness as you speak, now seeing him hold your hand as you keep touching his cheek. “But I’m always here if you decide to talk” 

Leon was reaching his breaking point. 

He was used to being a slave, always using his body, mind and soul to provide safety for the others without them knowing one damn thing about it; he was used to always being alone, to the point that kindness was a strange feeling, almost not existing at all and that he didn’t deserve it. But here you are. 

“It hurts to remember,” he confessed, his voice a low whisper. “I tried to forget it, but I can’t” 

When he felt you wrapping your arms around his body and your warmth embracing him, Leon felt his eyes getting wet. He was so deeply touch starved, craving something so human, that when he got it, he knew he was going to break. His mind was racing, and his body was trying to process the feeling and react in the proper way. He felt so many emotions at once that he thought he was going insane. 

“Please, keep holding me” Leon begs, his arms finding their way through your back as he hugs you back. “Because I know I’ll fall if you let me go” 

After that night, it took almost two months until Leon decided to show up at the store to see you again. He felt nervous, but at this point, he realized that, for some reason, he couldn’t stay away from you; he felt that you had some type of magnetism enough to keep him close, which made him feel comfortable, something he hadn't felt in a while. 

However, before he went to the store to see you, he needed courage. Leon thought you would be upset with him after being ghosted for almost two months, although he felt responsible for it, since he never told you the nature of his job or why he was so absent. Sadly, Leon was again in a spiral of sadness and depression. His last mission was a disaster, and Leon knew he had no control over his feelings again. He was sitting on his bed, contemplating the bottle in his hands. The curtains were closed, and the atmosphere inside his room was darker. He closes his eyes for a brief moment, and then, he’s there again. 

June 29, 2013. Tall Oaks, USA

“It might create more problems than it solves…” the voice of the president echoes inside his head as he points his gun towards the said person.

Leon doesn't recognize the man in front of him, or what he used to be. He keeps his gun raised, his grasp around the trigger getting tight by the second he makes his decision. His voice comes and goes, creating a tense atmosphere around him. 

“Bio-organic weapons are a global threat and we are partly to blame…” Benford said once to Leon when he expressed his desire to expose the truth about the Raccoon City Incident. He looks at the living corpse in front of him. Tick tack. He knows what he needs to do. “I’ve always valued your friendship, Leon… It’s time to take responsibility and end this mess” 

He shakes his head, somehow returning to his reality. 

“Stay right where you are!” Leon said, his voice sounding cracked and angry. The corpse starts walking towards him and as a reflex, his grip gets more tight. “Mr. President!” 

The zombie starts walking towards him and the woman next to him. He hesitates for a moment, unsure and sure about what he needs to do. Every part of him screams and begs, trying to find a solution. He knows it’s too late. He can’t save the president, he can’t save anyone. 

“Don’t make me do this” Leon gritted his teeth, trying to find any reason to avoid what needed to be done. It happens fast. Adam Benford, the former president of the United States and now a corpse, throws himself towards her. “Adam!” Leon screams.

He pulls the trigger. 

And there’s only blood. 

He gets out of his thoughts when he hears someone knocking on his front door. It doesn't take too long for him to finally stand up and see who’s there, and, inside his mind, he’s already preparing himself to tell this person to leave him alone, but his entire demeanor changes when he opens the door, and all he sees there is you. 

“You’re back” you smiled warmly at him, your cheeks red because of the cold temperature. “I wasn’t sure you were home” 

“What are you doing here?” Leon’s first question isn't as welcome as you thought it would be. 

“A friend can’t see a friend?” you answered simply, and the smile never left your lips. 

“I’m sorry” he sighs, giving you space to enter his place. “I didn’t mean to be rude” 

“Don’t worry” you said, removing your scarf and hat. “Are you ok?”

“I’m fine, I guess” Leon nods slowly, and you notice he’s not entirely well. 

“Breakfast?” you ask him, wanting to confirm your suspicions, and he nods quietly. 

You had difficulty finding yourself inside his place, since you’ve been there only once. You notice that he’s quiet, and despite that fact, which is completely normal for him, you know that there’s something wrong. So, you decided to go simple with his breakfast. Almost forty minutes later, you came back with a plate full of pancakes, crispy bacon, scrambled eggs, and some orange juice. 

He leisurely used his knife and fork to eat the food you made. The careful manner in which he ate wasn’t due to his cautious nature, but rather because he had a terrible hangover that messed with his coordination, and rushing could easily lead to a slip of the hand and his shaking. Leon was a pretty man, and he could easily take on leading roles in Hollywood blockbusters. However, he currently sported a scruffy beard, exuded a weary atmosphere, and radiated fatigue and discontent. 

“I think I reached rock bottom,” Leon finally says, but he avoids your gaze at all costs. 

“Then I’ll help you get out of there” you said with kindness, your pinky finger interlocking with his. 

IV. GRIEF AND BARGAIN 

The path to healing isn’t always easy, and now Leon is aware of that. 

The year is now 2014 and he’s struggling to forget what happened a year ago. Sometimes, when his mind is quiet, he starts to wonder. Is it possible that there could have been a world without Umbrella and zombies? Leon scoffed and shook off his sweet dreams. A world without zombies? That's something from a long time ago. The future is only going to become a worse hell. Then, he has to remind himself about the great things he has in life. You are one of these things.

Although he has your support, he knows that he’ll only get better walking this path by himself. The winter deciduous forest looked like branches made of human bones. A mixed forest with a walking path spread out. This is a high-end residential area in Bethesda, Maryland, where congressmen and bureaucrats commuting to Washington spend their nights. In the depths of a thicket, there was a slightly open gentle sloping area where the desired building was located. It was a designer house filled with a sense of openness, with all outer walls covered in glass, and it appeared like a model intended to showcase beautiful scenery rather than a place for people to live in. 

The luxury was excessive to the point where it seemed somewhat like a toy. Leon had hidden himself in the thicket away from the road and was monitoring the designer house through binoculars with night vision capabilities. It was an unacknowledged fact, but a traitor to the country was living in this mansion. Senator Steven Air, who had sold information to a bioterrorist organization, was one of many government officials who had been involved in the incident in Tall Oaks where the President became a victim of B.O.W. Simmons, the President's aide, was among those who betrayed the government. And Leon still blames himself for what happened that night. 

Currently, fifteen members of the Division of Security Operations (DSO) and two stealth drones have surrounded Steven's mansion. It was necessary to capture him and extract plenty of information before bringing him to trial. According to reports from aerial surveillance, Steven was on his way home by car from Washington. The distance from the White House to Bethesda was approximately twelve kilometers, and it would take about thirty minutes if he drove fast. Leon shifted his focus to his shoulder holster with a handgun. Of course, capturing him alive was best, but there was no hesitation in shooting the traitor if he resisted.

Leon suddenly remembers. This is Bethesda. The name is derived from the Bible. From the Gospel of John–

“Now there is in Jerusalem near the Sheep Gate a pool, which in Aramaic is called Bethesda and which is surrounded by five covered colonnades. Here a great number of disabled people used to lie — the blind, the lame, the paralyzed. One who was there had been an invalid for thirty-eight years."

Jesus healed the man who had been sick for 38 years. God's love and His miracles. Bravo. That's exactly what this world needs in this hell.

"Target approaching."

As he thinks about the Bible, a communication comes through his earpiece. It's a report from the overhead surveillance team flying a drone. A roadway that weaves through a grove of mixed trees was approached by Stephen's white Porsche, an elegant luxury car resembling a graceful white swan. Perhaps dozens, hundreds of people may have died to buy that car. Such is the life of a villain.

"Visual on the target vehicle. Secure upon my GO signal," Leon whispered into his radio microphone. Both the earphones and microphone were of a bone conduction type that excelled in noise resistance. It converts vocal cord vibrations transmitted through the skull directly into voice signals. It was a perfect gadget for special operations where one couldn't make loud noises or miss instructions in the midst of noise. 

The Porsche approached the garage. 

"GO," Leon said sharply. 

At that moment, two SUVs that had been hiding in a blind spot by the roadway started their engines like barking dogs and closed in on the Porsche at tremendous speed, trapping it in a pincer movement as planned. The driver of the Porsche was Stephen's secretary, with a bodyguard in the passenger seat and Stephen himself in the back seat. 

Suddenly trapped from the front and back, they were thrown into confusion. Leon wondered – would the bodyguard or secretary resist? There was no doubt that they were carrying guns. He didn't want to give them unnecessary visibility, but he would deal with it when the time came. The agents jumped out of the trees. In the next moment, Stephen's Porsche exploded. 

A deafening roar and shock. The high-performance explosive device planted under the car's body lifted the Porsche several meters off the ground, engulfing it in flames. And caught up in it, the DSO's SUVs overturned as well. The window glass of all the cars shattered into tiny pieces, the car bodies twisted and burned the people inside. All six agents from the team on foot, including Leon himself, were blown backwards by the force of the blast. Leon still thinks like he’s floating in the air, an eerie feeling of weightlessness that ended when he felt his body slamming against a tree trunk. In those fleeting moments, his consciousness waned, and it was the closest he had come to death.

Yet, it seemed the Grim Reaper was not yet ready to claim him. 

Pain, intense and searing, jolted Leon’s awareness back to life, a grunt of pain escaping his lips. Leon struggled to his feet, and he threw up, retching repeatedly. His consciousness ebbed and flowed like waves, and he knew that rest was essential. Leon suspected that his ribs and collarbone were either fractured or cracked, but, fortunately, his arms and legs remained unbroken. Gritting his teeth, he managed to force his dislocated left shoulder joint back into place, enduring the excruciating pain, as he tried to work out which way was up. 

There are bruises littered across his skin, scratches and abrasions where the bark of the tree tore his flesh. The shock of the explosion and the fear of death… an unpleasant feeling of internal organs turning over welled up. No matter how many times he experienced it, he could never get used to the terror of a close-range explosion. The air was knocked from his lungs; his breathing temporarily stopped; his eardrums were about to burst; and his knees were weak. He can barely stand. Leon finally sits up, willing his agent training to give him a sense of urgency even though his body is screaming in agony. The stench of gasoline fills the air, but Leon can barely smell it. His sense of smell and hearing are both almost gone. What the hell happened? Leon asked himself in front of the burning Porsche.

He feels paralyzed. 

It was three in the morning when your phone started to ring. 

It was an unknown number, and you had to fight the necessity of hanging up; something inside you told you to pick up the call, which you did. It was Leon, and the way his voice sounded on the phone made you aware that something bad had happened. Terrible, nonetheless. You drove to his location, and you found yourself shocked when you found smoke, fire and the smell of gasoline among a lot of government agents and military personnel. You found Leon sitting in the back of an ambulance, his body covered by a blanket, as he was examined by a paramedic. Not only that, but you had credentials to enter that isolated area, and the way those agents were rushing from one side to the other, talking on their phones, made it clear that someone important had died. You made your way towards Leon, not daring to look around, and when you reached him, you saw tears in his eyes. You hugged him tight, like you were holding the world in your hands. 

“It’s ok, I got you” you said to him, your words full of assurance and kindness. 

Leon refused to be taken to the hospital; instead, he asked you to drive him back home, since he felt he couldn’t do it on his own. The ride back to his place was silent, and you decided to respect his space, although you saw him trying to find solace in something real. He couldn’t stop playing with his finger, showing an elevated level of stress and anxiety. You have never seen him like this before. 

“Can you stay?” Leon suddenly asked when you pulled over in front of his house. “I… don’t want to be alone” 

“Yeah, sure” you nodded, noticing how vulnerable he was, which was odd. 

You heard him groaning in pain once he got out of your car, but he refused your help, insisting he was fine. Knowing him well at this point, you gently held his hand, offering nothing but your support, and Leon quietly appreciated your effort. You helped him sit on his couch and heard him mutter something only he could understand. Judging by the look on his face and the way his hands were still shaking, you knew he was in shock. 

“Do you have any first aid kits or something?” you asked him, hoping you would gain his attention. 

“I’m fine” Leon replies, his eyes fixated on his shaky hands. You sat next to him, holding his hands and scratching his skin softly. 

“It’s ok not to be okay." Your voice is almost a whisper as you look into his blue eyes. “You don’t have to be tough all the time” 

You saw him reach the breaking point. 

Feeling embraced by your kindness and safety, Leon finally allowed himself to feel his emotions — the same ones he fought hard to bury deep inside him — in the same place he swore he would never visit again. In the cozy atmosphere of his living room, having nothing but you as solace, the brunette agent gave himself a break, and when he did that, his eyes started to get watery.

After Raccoon City, Leon shut himself up so he wouldn’t be hurt ever again. He used to keep his emotions contained; he used to not think of them. He kept everything bottled up, because he knew he couldn’t handle it. Leon was so traumatized that the way he dealt with his feelings was to pretend they didn’t exist, in the first place. After Spain, it got worse. Nightmares after nightmares, the paranoia of still being infected with Las Plagas, everything that came after this. 

But here you are, telling him that it is ok not to be okay, that he doesn’t have to be tough, and that it is okay to feel and to be vulnerable. He couldn’t stop sobbing; his hands were still shaking, but he didn't even care about this at the moment. Gently, you started to play with his hair, your fingers slowly going up and down on his head, providing comfort and care — exactly what he’s been missing his entire life. 

“I lost them all” Leon started to say through sobs. “I saw them dead” 

“It wasn’t your fault” you assured him with calm words. 

“I failed them," he says as he looks at you, his blue eyes shining with tears as they fall through his skin. 

“That’s not true. You didn’t know the car was about to explode or whatever happened there” You tried to calm him down. 

“We were watching him; it was my responsibility to make sure they would be safe… it was my job to ensure that” Leon sobs again, and you can see he’s struggling to breathe due to his anxiety attack. 

“Listen, you’re too nervous right now. Come on, take a deep breath with me” you said, hoping he would listen and cope. 

Leon nods between sobs and takes several deep breaths to try to calm himself down. You took a glass of water and gave it to him, then you took his hand into yours, whispering words of assurance and kindness. You decided to put him to rest, and it wasn’t necessary to drag Leon into his bed; the moment you step foot inside his room, you can see how severe his depression is. Successfully, you were able to lay him down and remove at least his boots. Leon curled into his blankets and muffled his sobs with his pillows. 

“Do you want me to stay here until you fall asleep?” you ask, sitting on his bed with him, moving his hair from his eyes. He nodded silently. 

Slowly, his sobs turned into sniffs, and Leon finally fell asleep. It took almost an hour to calm him down completely, but now he was safe and sound into a peaceful slumber, or what appears to be. You don’t recall exactly when you fell asleep on his bed, but you certainly remember when you woke up to the sound of his screams. Leon never told you about his nightmares, and you weren’t expecting that. His chest was drenched in sweat, and he seemed like he couldn’t breathe. His eyes were filled with fear, and he was shaking head to toe. 

“Fuck” Leon mutters, his hand running through his hair. 

“What happened?” you ask him after turning the lights on. 

“Just a nightmare…” he whispers, trying to calm down again. 

“How frequent are they?” It was a bold question, but you needed to know. 

“Every night” Leon ignores your glance, focusing on his shaky hands again. 

“Here, drink it” you give him a glass of water with sugar to calm his nerves. You already had that glass with you the moment you went with him to his room. 

“Do you even like me?” Leon suddenly asks you. 

“What do you mean?” 

“You’re so kind, beautiful, and young, with so much in your future” Leon sighs heavily. “Why would you be with a… broken man like me? I have nothing to offer but traumas and the big baggage of my shitty life” 

The pressure you put on biting your lip was so intense that it was enough to cut your skin and make it bleed. 

“Who says you have nothing to offer? I don’t think that’s true. You’re a wonderful person, Leon. I can see it every day when you come to see me at the store. The way you smile whenever you are around me, the way your eyes shine…” you said to him, hoping it would be enough to give him some comfort. “I don’t see you as a broken person or a man with the baggage of a shitty life. I can’t imagine what must have happened to you, and I know it must be difficult and hard because that's what I see, but, Leon, the darkness around you doesn’t define who you are. Whatever life did to you, it doesn't dictate your present or future."

No matter how many kind words you say, it isn’t enough for him. Leon blames himself for what happened, and you know he won’t forget it so soon. How can he? Those men trusted him and followed him, and now, they’re all dead. Leon thinks he should’ve saved them, even though he knows he couldn’t guess the car was about to explode. 

“I wish I could heal your soul so you wouldn’t suffer anymore, but I can’t” you sigh, then look at his hand. “I wish I could fight all of your demons, but I can’t do that. I’m here and I don’t intend to leave you alone” 

After holding his hand, it was the first night Leon actually slept without any more nightmares. When he woke up the next morning, he felt his eyes heavy and he instantly remembered how he cried the night before after his entire squad was murdered. Then, he also remembered that you were there with him the whole time. Finally, he noticed how strange that feeling was - the feeling of being comforted instead of comforting others. It was a strange feeling indeed, but it was a good one. 

Lazily, he stood up from his bed and decided to look at himself in the mirror, washing his face and taking a moment to see the collateral damage caused by the bomb. There were a few bruises and cuts on his skin, but huge purple marks on his shoulder, which he dislocated. It still hurts, but it’s enough to keep him in the real world. He’s still alive.  

“Morning, princess” you greeted him in his kitchen. “I made breakfast” 

“You shouldn’t worry about that, y’know?” Leon says, leaning against his cabinet. 

“Too late for that. Now is my job to worry about ya” you said, opening the cabinet above your head on tiptoe, which made him smirk. “Are you feeling better?” 

“Yeah, I guess so” he says, nodding his head and helping you get the cornflakes. “Thank you… for sticking up with me last night” 

“You know I care about you, right? Since day one” you glance at him with a warm smile. “I really do” 

“I care about you, too” Leon blushes slightly. “More than I can tell” 

You know Leon pretty well at this point and you know he has trouble speaking of his feelings. You know he can’t express himself properly, and you ain’t stupid. You know someone has hurt him before and you understand why he is the way he is. Fortunately, you are very patient, and that’s enough for now, because you don’t mind giving him time and space. 

“I can look at your wounds; maybe I can help” you offered, finishing preparing the breakfast. 

“This means I finally earned your secrets?” Leon asks, a small smile on his lips, as he references the conversation you had with him a few months ago. 

“You surely did." You nodded, smiling. “Let’s eat first, then I’ll take a look at it” 

Leon seemed to enjoy the breakfast you made for him, and, for the first time since you two met, he genuinely seemed happy. However, you knew deep inside he was trying and fighting hard to hide his true feelings; losing his squad certainly shattered him inside, and caused more damage to him than you could ever imagine. 

Leon is a master when it comes to hiding his feelings. All over the years, Leon had built around himself an impenetrable shell, not allowing anyone to get closer, and all of that because he is scared of being hurt again. However, if the explosion never happened, if his men never died the way they did, Leon wouldn’t be pretending he’s fine when you know he’s not. The damage is so intense that you’re afraid he won’t recover. It’ll always be there with him, rotting inside him. 

You weren’t expecting so many wounds all at once, but when he took off his shirt and you saw his bruised skin, you took a deep breath. He had so many marks, so many stories. You wanted to ask, you wanted to know, but Leon wasn’t ready to share it yet. 

“I got this one back in Raccoon City” Leon quietly says, pointing to the scar on his left shoulder. “I got shot” 

“How did this happen?” you decided to ask him as you gently cleaned a few cuts he had.  

“I was helping a woman named Ada Wong to get a sample of G-Virus, and only a scientist named Annette Birkin had this sample. We were trying to find her and, when we did, she started to shoot Ada. I jumped in front of her, that’s why I got shot” Leon sighs, recalling the events that happened in the sewers. 

“This Ada seems very important to you” you smiled at him, cleaning the other cut he had on his neck.  

“She was, but it was a long time ago” Leon avoids your gaze. “Not anymore” 

“She was the one that hurt you?” you ask him very carefully. 

Leon didn’t answer, but his silence speaks for himself. You can see the extension of the damage and how Leon still struggles to deal with whatever happened between him and Ada. He stays silent, maybe trying to understand how his life turned into this mess. Then, he starts to count every time he was betrayed before until this very moment. His blue irises meet yours and all he feels is… peace. There’s no inner storms inside him, he feels completely at ease. 

“If I ask you a favor…” Leon suddenly says, changing the conversation. 

“What do you need?” you ask him without hesitation. 

“Could you come with me to the morgue? There’s something I need to do” Leon sighs, preparing himself for what’s about to happen. 

“Of course. I’ll tell my parents I’ll go to the store later” you nodded, quickly picking up your phone to text them. 

Leon partially felt guilty, but you were so willing to go with him that he changed his mind after you helped him dress himself — the way he dislocated his shoulder still hurts and he has difficulty with it. You drove to the morgue and judging by the interior of the building, you found out Leon was some sort of agent working for the government. You were able to read the name of the organization. Division of Security Operations. 

“So you’re a badass agent, huh?” you ask with enthusiasm as you walk next to him. 

“I wouldn’t say I’m a badass” Leon chuckles, still feeling tense. 

“Well, if you put your neck at stake to save your country, then you’re definitely a badass” you added, giving him a warm smile. 

When you both stepped inside the morgue, he reached out for your hand, seeking any support you could give him. The back wall was a box-shaped cold storage room, and a row of dissecting tables lined the spacious room. And on those dissecting tables were numerous body bags. It's a body bag with the DSO logo on it. Do they really need a logo even on something like this? Irony floated within Leon's chest. Are they planning to sell products with the logo on them, like DSO-branded body bags, DSO-logoed cigarette cases, DSO-logoed pass cases...?

He walked between the body bags to the sound of his boots. Unlike normal bodies, the victims of b.o.w - related incidents were usually sent for examination to specialized research institutions. Although this time the cause of death was due to a bomb, not a zombie attack, the instruction from above was to send the bodies to various laboratories, so they followed suit. This DSO branch’s mortuary was a relay point for passing the bodies from the scene to the laboratory, like a baton in a relay race. It wasn’t easy to simply bury them in a graveyard. The morgue itself wasn’t scary, but the corpses were scary because they stimulated the imagination. 

“Would they suddenly start moving? Would I end up like this too?” Leon thinks to himself a little bit loud, enough for you to hear him.

“You won’t” you whispered, squeezing his hand to let him know you were there.  

Watching the corpses closely would cause a moment where the elongated shadows would appear like monsters. However, that was before Raccoon City. He had seen too many moments where the dead came back to life. 

“I’m not scared of the mortuary anymore; recently, I’ve been thinking about it a lot” Leon frowned as he moved towards the back while swirling his thoughts. He thought he heard a sound from there minutes before. 

“What do you mean?” you ask him with curiosity as he approaches one of the bags. 

“I was constantly thinking about death and ending everything. I was depressed and thought I had no hope left” Leon confessed, his eyes locked on the body bags in front of him. “But now… I don’t think about that anymore”

He glances at you, finally. Slowly, his eyes meet your hand while you’re holding him and there’s a small smile on his lips, then his blue irises find yours again. 

“I used to be scared of the morgue… but coming here with you… is something else” Leon says next. “I couldn’t do this alone” 

“I’m glad I can help” you said to him with your usual kindness. 

But he stops and turns his attention back to the body bags and sighs. His entire demeanor changed and suddenly, he found himself fighting hard to keep doing this. He needed that. He owed his men at least this final goodbye. 

“What kind of adult did I want to become when I was a child?” Leon thinks to himself as he approached one of the body bags. 

The zipper was slightly open, and the body bag seemed like it was about to move any moment. It’s common for something that seems like it’s about to move to actually move.

Leon carelessly closed the zipper. Was it because of the sharp sound that, suddenly, another body bag bounced behind him? Inside the body bag, the zombie was wiggling and struggling. It seemed unhappy, as if it had been woken up from a deep sleep by force. Leon pulled out his gun from his holster and squeezed the trigger. 

“What kind of adult did I want to become? I definitely didn’t want a life like this” 

V. ACCEPTANCE 

After everything that happened with his squad, Leon knew he needed time off of his office. Decided to get his mind off everything and take a break, Leon chose the Rocky Mountains in Colorado as his destination. Instead of going there alone, he thought it would be good to spend more time with you, mostly because he felt safe around you and due to the nature of his job and everything he saw, he needed to feel that safety only you provided him.  

You had to explain to your parents why you would be going on a vacation, but they understood with no problems; they didn’t know about Leon because you were fearing some trouble because of the age gap, so you felt they weren’t exactly ready to meet him. How could you explain to them you were apparently dating a man eleven years older than you? It would be one hell of a surprise. 

It was 9 a.m. in the mountainous area near Rocky Mountain National Park, located in northern Colorado. The national park was about a two-hour drive from the state capital, Denver. Along the way, there were several viewpoints where numerous travelers parked their cars to enjoy the scenic beauty. Even in the mountainous region of the Rockies, the mountains around this area were not exceptionally high. They were just before the tree line, covered with spruce and fir trees on the subalpine slopes. The forest appeared like a beautifully groomed brush, while wildflowers bloomed modestly, sheltered by large rocks.

“This place is incredible” you sound mesmerized by the incredible view from the hotel. 

“You haven’t been in places like this before?” Leon asks you with curiosity. 

“I barely leave my house” you chuckle, leaving your bag on the bed. “I just work at my parent’s store and go to college” 

“It feels like I’m dating a baby” Leon chuckles, also leaving his bag next to yours. 

“We’re dating, huh?” you teased, taking off your sneakers. 

“Yeah, we are” Leon nods his head, smiling. “I know I haven’t officially asked you, but I’m too old for that” 

“It’s fine, old man. I’m just messing with you” you said, playing with his fingers. 

“Old man? Now I’m offended” Leon teases back, smiling. 

“You said it first” you replied to him, your hands reaching his brown hair. “By the way… I have something for you” 

Leon glanced at you, frowning. The mischievous smile on your lips immediately told him you were planning something. He sat up on the bed and kept his eyes fixed on you, waiting patiently for whatever you were about to do. 

“I got you a birthday present” you said with enthusiasm, catching him by surprise. “I know I’m a few days late, but I wanted to give you something for your 37th birthday” 

“You didn’t have to” Leon whispered in shock as you gave him the small box. 

He unwrapped the present you gave him and found a beautiful dagger, silver and shining, also pretty sharp. Leon knew immediately that you probably paid a lot on that and he felt bad. He took a deep breath and glanced at you. 

“This was very expensive. You shouldn’t waste your money with me like that” Leon says to you. 

“It’s a gift. You can’t give it back” you said to him, a hint of playfulness in your voice as you insisted for him to keep it. 

“That’s not fair” Leon complains, laughing softly. 

“It’s pretty fair to me, though” you said to him, smirking. “It’s just a dagger, not a diamond or something related. I know your job is kind of dangerous and you might need it” 

“Okay, you win. I’ll take it” Leon sighs in defeat. “About my job… I know I haven’t been extremely open about it, but…” 

“It’s okay, I don’t want you to feel forced to share this with me if you don’t feel ready” you stopped him before he could finish his sentence. 

“I wish I could be more open to you” Leon glanced at his hands, feeling bad because of that. 

“Start simple and small. You don’t have to tell me absolutely everything at once” you placed your hand on his shoulder, petting him. 

“Simple and small? How could I do that?” Leon frowned at the idea. He always thought it was impossible to open up about his trauma. 

You pondered for a few moments, thinking about a way to help him talk about his issues in a positive way. 

“Start with something like… why don't you like dogs?” you suggested. A while ago you noticed Leon had a certain aversion to dogs. 

“I… um… I was attacked by dogs in Raccoon City. They weren’t common dogs, they were infected, something like that” Leon found himself surprised by the way he spoke about this issue so easily. “Then, at Spain, I had a few encounters with wolves also infected with a parasite, monstrous things” 

“See? That one was pretty easy” you said, encouraging him to keep talking. “Wanna try to say something else?” 

Leon thought about your question for minutes; inside his head, everything that has happened to him was like an endless movie. The trauma, the pain and the events that seem to be haunting him to this day. It was hard to pick one, but then, he reminds himself of your words of being simple and small. He takes a deep breath and quietly, he convinces himself that he can do this. 

“Back at Raccoon City, it was my first day at the force and I was 21 at the time” Leon starts, his eyes focused on something else. “I was late, but I think that’s why I’m still alive” 

While he was telling you the horrors he saw, you gently placed your hand on his, to let him know you’re there for him. It was a simple and kind gesture, but for him, it meant the world. Leon was only familiar with danger and brutality, so having you by his side providing comfort was enough to penetrate the depth of his former persona. It was enough to rescue the rookie cop buried inside those walls. 

“After that night… everything changed. I’m here because of what I did to survive and I’m not exactly proud of it. I can’t stop blaming myself for my past actions, but…” Leon suddenly stops, taking another deep breath. 

“You can’t control everything around you, Leon. And not everything that happens to us is our fault. You couldn’t know you were going to be stalked and nearly killed on your first day… you didn't know that there was a virus outbreak in Raccoon City that night…” you said to him, placing your hand on his shoulder. “You need to understand that this isn’t your baggage to carry. What happened that day wasn’t your fault” 

Leon had your words playing on repeat inside his head. Even though he was early in the morning drinking his sorrows away, he was still thinking about what you said. He also felt partially guilty for leaving you asleep in the bed while he was drinking, but the other part of him told you knew him pretty well and you wouldn’t be judging him for this. His head was a roller coaster and at this very moment, he wasn’t at the top. 

Leon sat on the first floor of a lodge-style hotel in the rural town. The hotel was two stories tall, made of reinforced concrete, but designed to resemble traditional log construction. There was only one waiter and one chef, making it far from a trendy establishment — a rather run-down place. He was having breakfast in the first-floor restaurant. Though the restaurant wasn't popular, the food was decent. Approaching footsteps came from behind him — two sets of them.

"--To come fully armed to such a peaceful town," Leon said without turning around.

"Leon S. Kennedy, the ace of the DSO, a special agent organization directly under the President of the United States," a voice replied.

Finally, he turned around to see Chris Redfield and Rebecca Chambers standing there.

"Chris and... oh, the renowned expert in biohazard research, Professor Rebecca Chambers. What do you want?" he asked.

"It's work. Cooperate," Chris said in an uncompromising tone.

Chris and Rebecca sat across from him. And it was noticeable that he wore an annoyed expression. 

"I'm on vacation." 

"...In the past, while protecting the President's daughter, Ashley Graham, you fought and annihilated the cult group Los Illuminados. They were using special bio-organic weapons called Plagas," Chris said.

"I've forgotten about that old stuff," Leon replied simply.

"Do you plan on loafing around in this town for another week?" Chris asked.

"I don't know what will happen in the future," Leon retorted.

"Beer, please," Rebecca chuckled at the reference to an old movie, while Chris wore an unamused expression.

Leon called over a passing waitress with a casual wave to place his order, but Chris interrupted him.

"Cancel the beer."

"No, it's not canceled."

“Come on… what the fuck?!”

"I don't need any more alcohol."

"Cut it out. What's going on?"

"That's my line."

The waitress looked between the two of them suspiciously and before walking away. Eventually, Leon pulled out a flask from his back pocket and took a swig as a substitute for the additional order that couldn't be fulfilled.

"You–!" Chris leaned forward.

"Enough, both of you," Rebecca interjected. "--Leon. We apologize for disturbing your vacation. However, we need the information you possess," Rebecca said.

Finally, Leon showed a willingness to listen.

"...What's the situation?" he asked.

Chris and Rebecca had to explain to him what happened earlier at the university. The case was simple. Glenn Arias was a new threat and they needed to stop him at all costs. However, they didn’t know how Leon was suffering inside; they couldn’t know about the recent events. Leon wearily intertwines his gestures and continues, 

"Just before I took my vacation... I was involved in a DSO mission in Bethesda to apprehend a treacherous senator who was selling internal information to a bioterrorist organization." 

The disgusted irritation was evident in his movements, his expression, and his voice. 

"You know..." Leon begins. "Here's the thing: the informant we used betrayed us. We fell into a trap instead. A massive explosion killed many of my colleagues... and then there was the incident with the resurrection of the corpses you guys were involved in... It's all a mess," 

Leon explains, letting out a heavy sigh. It's a sigh that escapes unintentionally, like a burden he carries.

"I had planned to become a police officer in Raccoon City. It was my dream job. But on my first day, there was a massive zombie outbreak, and from there... it never stopped," Leon pauses and shakes his head. "I've been fighting this whole time. There's no end in sight, and it only keeps getting worse. Have I been living just to fight zombies and the people who create them?"

"What are you trying to say? That you don't want to cooperate with us?" Chris asks.

"It's not that..." Leon's tone is uncertain, "Well, maybe it is."

With a hesitant tone, Leon continues

“What exactly is our goal? How far do we have to run? Do we have to keep running endlessly? The villains keep coming, one after another, while the good people keep dying. Maybe it's better to lose our minds."

Then, Chris found himself forced to explain to Leon what they were facing. He showed pictures of Cathy White, the agent that was turned into a bio-weapon. And worse, her son she killed. He showed the photos taken during the autopsy and how Glenn turned people into something else purely because of power. 

"Killing him is the goal," Chris declares.

"That's only your goal, not mine," Leon retorts, his voice filled with resentment.

Tension fills the air between them once again.

"Hey," Rebecca interrupts, breaking the silence just as she did before. "So, Leon, you're exhausted," Rebecca points at Leon and then gestures to Chris. "And Chris, you're frustrated. There's one thing both tired people and irritable people have in common."

"What do we have in common?" Chris asks in response.

They both look at each other with a wide-eyed grin.

"You only think about yourselves," Rebecca replies. 

"I–" Chris tries to interject, but Rebecca continues. 

"Chris, all you talk about is wanting to kill Glenn Arias. After helping me, you didn't say a single word mourning the sacrifices of our colleagues. Leon, you're acting like a college student in their moratorium period. People get tired of running. But if we stop running, more people will lose their lives."

Rebecca takes out a trigger-activated needleless syringe from her small bag. In front of the bewildered duo, she abruptly presses the syringe against her left forearm and pulls the trigger, causing her blood to collect in the test tube attached to the syringe.

"I'll tell you something important. We're already infected," she says.

"What?" Leon's expression tightens in response.

Rebecca continues speaking in a tone reminiscent of a teacher addressing a poor student. 

"The truth is, it's difficult to estimate just how many people have been infected by Arias' new virus. The problem is, we don't know the identity of the trigger that activates it."

As she speaks, Rebecca removes the test tube from the syringe and seals it with a cap.

"The virus is activated by something only Arias knows. When that happens, the dead rise, and living humans become bio-weapons."

Rebecca glances lightly at Leon. 

"If things continue like this, this city will eventually become a living hell. There won't be any safe places."

Leon remains silent, averting his gaze.

"Just so you know, a prototype of the antivirus has been developed," Rebecca says. "It actually worked on me. However, the effectiveness of the antivirus is unstable without knowing the conditions for the activation of Arias' virus. When to administer it and how long it remains effective..."

Rebecca then places the sealed test tube into a small protective case and puts it on the table. 

"My blood should provide valuable data. If I die, make sure it reaches a reputable research institution that you can trust."

"You're not in danger. We'll protect you," Chris says firmly.

"What?" Leon asks, confused.

"It seems like you're misunderstanding, BSAA soldier," Rebecca lightly dismisses Chris's assumption.

There’s a slight smirk on Leon’s lips as he hears that. 

"The forefront of pandemic response is not the BSAA, but the research field. How many doctors and colleagues do you think I've seen die in conflict-ridden African countries or small Middle Eastern nations used as testing grounds for bio-weapons?" Rebecca questions.

Chris tries to say something in response, but his voice gets stuck in his throat, and only faint breaths escape.

"After I left the team, you two might have fought against plenty of mad scientists. But science can only be countered with science. Unless benevolent technology advances, we will never have a chance of winning. We fight not only for ourselves but for others. Have you both understood at least a little of what I'm saying?" Rebecca asks.

She stands up and adds, "Cool your heads," before leaving her seat.

"She's a great woman," Leon comments.

"We can't handle it on our own," Chris remarks, watching Rebecca leave, and he and Leon exchanged a wry smile. 

And then, here it comes. The urge to talk about what happened one year ago. 

"Leon, China was tough," Chris says, referring to that incident.

"Yeah, it was like a zombie version of Black Hawk Down." he nods in response. 

"At that time, I wanted to quit the BSAA so badly," Chris admits, surprising Leon, "After getting involved with Umbrella, I witnessed too many deaths. We..." 

Chris trails off. His expression was heavy, as if lead had settled in the depths of his heart. Then Chris realized: Why does it make me so angry to see him like this? He was too much like his old self.

"It makes you want to quit... makes me want to quit," Chris says, emphasizing his point. Leon falls into silence. And Chris delivers the final blow. "But, the moment we quit, all of our subordinates and friends will have died in vain. We are the survivors of Raccoon City. We carry that burden."

Chris falls silent, and the air becomes still. The waitress looks annoyed by the silence. For a few moments, there’s nothing but the said silence. 

"Leon, I always thought you were a cheerful guy no matter what," Chris breaks the silence.

"No one is like that," Leon replies, “Well… I’m not. I've always been a stress-tolerant guy. I've been able to do what I've done because of it. But now look back on it. In Tall Oaks, I killed the president.”

"Technically, you had to save the President infected with the virus," Chris quickly adds, trying to provide some context.

“But,” Leon shakes his head, "But the fact remains that I pulled the trigger, I shot him, and I was even suspected of assassinating the President afterward. Although I managed to clear my name, the mastermind behind that incident turned out to be the President's aide. The DSO was once called the 'Sword of the President,' but now it sounds ironically fitting."

Chris remains silent, attentively listening to Leon's words.

"Chris," Leon continues. "I've returned to active duty, but every time I face the new President, I feel anxious. I can sense his unease as well. The President's aide had sold his soul to B.O.W. terrorism. Who's next? The Secretary of Defense? The Vice President? What's become of the foundation that supports the soldiers in the field? They keep using us, while the higher-ups continue to flounder, grow bloated... They only think about shifting blame onto others."

He pauses for a moment. There’s so much pain. 

Leon furrows his brow and lowers his voice. "Perhaps the reason entities like Umbrella persist is that our society harbors a fundamental evil... I can't help but feel that way now."

Even agreeing with this stupid mission, Leon can’t go without saying goodbye. He feels guilty, but the moment he sees you, everything feels completely right. He sat at the bed, watching you perfectly asleep, imagining what kind of dreams you were having. Leon sighs and shakes his head. 

“Hey, sweetheart” Leon says when he sees you waking up. 

“Hi” you whisper, rubbing your eyes. 

“Listen… something happened and my colleagues need me. Will you be okay here?” he asks you, his thumb trailing your cheek. 

“Will you come back?” you ask him, sounding a little groggy. 

“And leave my baby girl here all alone? Of course I’ll come back” he smiles sweetly at you. 

“Ok… I’ll be here” you nodded your head, closing your eyes to go back to sleep. 

Something about you made him see, for the first time, the bright side of things. Maybe it was the fact that you were younger than him, and also the fact that you were full of energy - he was just an old and bitter man. But, hey, he’s learning how to cope with every shit that has happened to him. 

Before you, Leon was ready to die. 

He was ready to embrace death, he already had made peace with his inner demons. But everything changed when you came into his life. Suddenly, he thought he could live and find happiness and death wasn’t in his thoughts anymore. It was like you were able to bring him back from his darkness. He wasn’t rotting inside. You were able to rescue him from himself and return the light he needed. 

But if he thought he wasn’t close to death, he was wrong. Leon never thought he would face something like Glenn Arias and come close to death, but he had his job to do. Chris needed his help and Leon finally found closure to something that was weighing on his head; the death of his squad wasn’t his fault and he found the real culprit. He found the peace he was desperately looking for. And he was able to see another sunrise and come back to you. 

It was a repetitive cycle. Leon recently started to wonder if anything he did was futile. That's why he took a vacation and drowned his sorrows in alcohol. It was a kind of protest, perhaps. A protest against the grand concepts of this world and destiny. A statement of "I’m not going on like this forever, I’m not going to do it," or something of that sort. But fate was cruel. In the end, human life rarely goes well by one's own choices. Perhaps humans are merely chosen by fate without their consent. Yet, Leon now felt that it was okay like that. Being chosen doesn't make him a hero by default. He becomes a hero reluctantly because he was chosen. And that's fine. 

The merged form approached Leon with an eerie growl, swinging its massive fist. Leon leaped back to dodge it, and the merged form's punch shattered one of the spires on the rooftop into tiny fragments. It had the destructive power of a construction hammer, with each strike resembling the impact of a tank cannon round. Leon intentionally slid and jumped into the merged form's feet, thinking that at such a large size, close range might become a blind spot. He positioned himself beneath the massive body, lying on his back and firing his handgun. The shots were practically point-blank, but they were still deflected by the hardened muscles and exoskeleton. 

"Doesn't matter," Leon muttered involuntarily. "I'll do whatever it takes, even if it's futile. Today's a good day to die anyway."

The merged form kicked out.

The enemy's movements were deceptively swift, and Leon was sent flying as if hit by a car. His body tumbled through the air until it finally collided with a gargoyle statue, coming to a stop. The impact was so intense that his breath nearly ceased. However, the merged form continued its pursuit. It threw a straight punch, a blow that would surely result in instant death if landed, but Leon managed to evade it with a jump. Not only did he dodge it, but in mid-air, Leon twisted his body and unleashed a spinning kick. His boot-clad foot connected with the grotesque face of the merged form.

Whether it would have any effect or not didn't matter. This strike was my will. Of course, a kick from a mere human wouldn't have any effect. The merged form retaliated with its opposite hand, grabbing hold of Leon.

"Gah!" A groan escaped Leon's throat involuntarily. The massive fist tightened around him like a vice, and within a few seconds, he felt himself being crushed like a tomato.

"Leon!" Chris emerged from the penthouse.

In his fading consciousness, Leon thought about you. The way you smiled whenever you were with him and the sweet perfume you love to use. The way your hands embrace him at night, helping him sleep safely, without any nightmares to harm him. And then, he doesn’t want to die anymore. Please, God, don’t let me die this way. 

Chris picked up the fully automatic handgun that Arias had dropped along the way and unleashed a barrage of bullets at the merged form. For a brief moment, it seemed like the merged form's focus shifted, and its grip loosened slightly, but that was all.

Was my life meant to end here, crushed by this grotesque monster? Leon wondered, his pessimism threatens to shatter him. Leon wasn't the type to easily get this depressed or overthink things too much. Still, he felt more than a little exhausted.

What kind of adult did I want to become when I was a child? I never imagined I would be burdened with the stigma of assassinating a president. At least, I didn't want a life like this ― It doesn't matter what I want. There's no such thing as a person who can live the life they desire. Arias must have felt the same way. In the end…

VI. ABSOLUTION

When he came back, you noticed something inside him had changed. 

After the fight with Arias, Leon noticed that life was much more than death, darkness and depression. At least, he started to think like that when he almost got killed. And his only thought was coming back to you. No, he couldn’t die like that and leave you alone. His arm was injured, but he was alive. And he was back. 

“What happened to your arm?” you asked him when you saw him entering the room. 

“Remember that day in the morgue when you told me I was a badass government agent?” Leon asks you back, sitting on the bed next to you. 

“Yep, I do” you nodded, starting to massage his tense muscles. 

“Well… I’m not this kind of agent. I work under the president’s orders. I fight bioweapons for a living… since that hell in Raccoon City” Leon sighs, finally opening about his job. 

“Bioweapons? Like zombies and shit?” you ask him with curiosity. 

“Worse than zombies, but yes” Leon nodded with a slight smirk. “It’s dangerous, and this time I nearly got killed… thing is, my job requires a lot of my time, it forces me to not be around for God knows how long. It scares me because I don’t know if you can live this chaotic life with me…” 

“Wait, wait, wait… slow down” you held his hand and squeezed it softly. “Everyone deserves a second chance in life, Leon. You were alone for too much time and I don’t mind if you need to go somewhere else to fight bioweapons. If this means I get to see these pretty eyes of yours and this sweet smile every time you come home… I’m willing to live this chaotic life with you” 

Leon couldn’t believe your words. After being deprived of something so human and getting used to it, Leon felt he was about to explode. It was too much for him to handle. At this point, he knew perfectly he was experiencing anxiety. But it was a good one. 

“I don’t want you to get hurt. If we do this, I’m gonna get you wrapped up in something bad someday… and I’ll never forgive myself if this happens” Leon tells you, sounding extremely worried.

“I know you won’t let anything bad happen to me. And besides, I can take care of myself. I made self defense classes” you laugh sweetly, a symphony to his ears. 

“Are you sure?” Leon asks, and those big puppy eyes of his wanting nothing but assurance.

“Honey, if this wasn’t true, I wouldn’t be here” you chuckled, kissing his forehead. 

After what happened, you decided to introduce Leon to your family as your boyfriend. But before that, you convinced him he needed to improve a little. Getting rid of the alcohol was the first step. He started to see a therapist and work harder on his issues, which influenced a lot of your relationship. He was more happy and willing to do things he and you both liked. One year after that incident with his squad being killed and his mission with his friends, you noticed he was ready to meet your parents. 

“I’m nervous” Leon tells you when you both were entering your home. 

“Why? It’s not like we’ve been dating secretly for almost three years. Besides, they’ll think you’re cute, don’t worry” you giggled at him. 

“I’m not so sure about that” he muttered, following you inside your parents place.

You could clearly tell how anxious he was. However, he always felt at ease on your side, and it was like you had the power to make him relax, like nothing could harm him and the world was finally at peace. When you stepped inside the house with Leon right behind you for a Christmas dinner, your parents were already expecting both of you. 

“Mom, dad… this is Leon. The guy I was talking about” you introduced him to your parents with certain expectations. 

“You clearly got my taste for man” Leon heard your mom whispering to you, which made his cheeks turn red. 

“So… um… how long are you two hanging out?” your dad asked and you glanced quickly at Leon. 

“Three years, I guess. We met at the store” you tell your parents. “I didn’t tell you before because Leon has a busy schedule. He’s not always in town, so…” 

“Well, moonpie, if you’re happy, we’re happy too” your mom says with a gracious smile on her lips. 

Leon wasn’t expecting to be so welcomed into your family, but the fact that your parents treated him so kindly melted his heart. He got himself thinking about the dinner for at least one week, mostly because part of him was still thinking it was weird to receive so much kindness and affection, especially coming from a real family. He wasn’t expecting to be playing cards with your dad while you and your mom were in the kitching talking about girl’s stuff, but it was enough to make him see he made the right choice. That it was okay for him to finally experience love. 

“I like your light brown hair now that you finally stopped dying it” you said, sitting between his legs in the living room. 

“My emo era is over” he chuckles sweetly, like a melody. 

“May it rest in peace” you made the signal of the cross. “

“Changing the subject, tomorrow I gotta go to San Francisco. Work stuff” he says to you, softly kissing your neck. 

“Yeah? Am I getting some gift?” you whisper, feeling the shivers down your spine with his lips against your skin. 

“Do I ever go on a mission and come back empty handed?” Leon asks you, his soft lips pressing more against your neck and you can feel him softly biting you. 

The thing is, Leon is like a porcelain doll. He needs to be treated with softness and kindness, because deep down, he is vulnerable. The way his lips met your skin was a clear sign that he was ready for you. He was finally ready to be yours. However, loving Leon also needed patience, and after three years, you could tell he wanted that too. 

“Do you want to do this before you leave, handsome?” you ask him teasingly, holding his hands as he keeps kissing your neck. 

“Yes, I do,” he nods, almost moaning in your ear. 

He gently took you to his bedroom, the place was almost a sanctuary for him. He laid you down on his bed and removed his shirt, and this time, he didn’t seem ashamed of himself. You stood up from his bed and sat him on the edge, your hands trailing down his skin like he was a roller coaster. He closed his eyes, his breath soft and calm, although he anticipated what was about to happen. Leon craved for you. 

“I’ll take care of you” you whispered, leaving soft kisses across his neck and chest. 

You sat gently between his legs, your sweet and soft fingers removing his pants and reaching his already hardened cock. He sat there, observing you with those big and blue puppy eyes, like he was savoring your image. When you took all his length inside your mouth and gently started to suck him, Leon felt he was in heaven. It felt so good, so powerful. 

Tears started to fall from his eyes and he cried. Not because you were hurting him, dear lord, of course not! It was because he finally felt that he deserved to be loved. Your tongue did an amazing job on his cock and when he came, he felt his body at ease. Leon moaned with the sudden sensation, it was stronger than he last remembered. But it was because of you. 

“I love you” he says when you touch his face, wiping his tears. 

Loving Leon needed patience, you knew that already. 

However, living with him brought new challenges that you weren’t expecting at all. He would be gone for weeks, then he comes back out of nowhere. He always forgets to send you a message to let you know he’s coming back, but that’s okay, because his lack of patience to deal with technology amuses you. He always sends an emoji out of context, which makes you laugh and you find it very cute when he gets disappointed for misunderstanding those little and yellow faces. He’s getting there, don’t worry about that. 

When he’s at home, things turn out differently. He always helps you with the chores, likes to tease you whenever you’re cooking his favorite meal and at the end of the day, you two are together on the couch watching some silly movie while he complains about it and softly scratches your leg. Sharing a domestic life was something he never thought he would have, not after everything he went through alone. 

Now that he's back from whatever he did in San Francisco, you have another job to do. Tend to his injuries. It’s a small sacrifice to pay whenever he comes back hurt; this time he has purple marks all over his body and face. You don’t ask what on earth happened, because you know he can’t really give details, but at least he’s safe and sound with you again. 

“Stop moving, old man!” you tell him, trying to clean a small cut he had on his neck. 

“That hurts,” Leon replied back, flinching slightly. 

“I know, but someone has to clean it” you rolled your eyes, applying a Barbie band-aid on his neck. 

“Please, don’t tell me I got the Barbie thing on my neck” Leon closes his eyes, taking a deep breath. 

“Next time I’ll get you a cat one” you wink playfully at him. 

After so many death experiences and the inner wish of being dead, he’s glad that he found the absolution that he always wanted. He looks at you with amusement, part of him finds it hard to believe that he’s so lucky to have you, but the other part is glad that you are real and you love him for who he really is. You took every damaged part of him and loved with such intensity that it was enough to bring him back from that dark place he was at. He forgave himself, allowed his soul to heal and to be loved. Life had gifted him with the second chance to live, made him see the beautiful things again. You took him in when he was on the lower part of his life, and your love brought him back. He knows he’s getting older, but he doesn’t mind spending his days with you, because you are the only thing in his life that makes sense.

And he’s fine with that. 

#leon s kennedy x reader #leon kennedy x reader #leon kennedy smut #leon s kennedy x you #leon kennedy x you #leon scott kennedy x reader #leon scott kennedy x you #leon kennedy x reader smut #leon kennedy angst #leon kennedy fluff #leon s kennedy #leon fluff #leon fic #leon kennedy fanfic #leon s kennedy fanfiction #leon s kennedy smut #leon scott kennedy fluff #leon scott kennedy smut #leon kennedy x y/n #leon resident evil #resident evil fanfiction #resident evil x reader #re6 leon #vendetta leon #di leon

[hysteria-things]

CAN YOU PLEASE MAKE LITERALLY ANYTHING FOR NATE🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏 (preferably smut) BUT IM LITERALLY BEGGING PLEASE (no rush💗💗 love ur work)

SINFUL DESIRES (part one)

read part two here

read part three here

read part four here

𝐩𝐚𝐢𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠: dom!nate x reader

𝐬𝐮𝐦𝐦𝐚𝐫𝐲: it feels like every day there’s a blowout between you and nate. however, something changes when all of a sudden he’s knocking at your bedroom window.

𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬: SMUTTY SMUT, swearing, teasing, some praise/degradation, pet names (pretty), p in v, unprotected sex (don’t be silly wrap your willy!), stomach bulge, possessiveness, cream pie, ROUGHHH

𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐝 𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐭: 1,172

𝐚𝐮𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐫'𝐬 𝐧𝐨𝐭𝐞: this is low key toxic LMAO but it’s okay cause nate’s a cutie patootie.

thank you anon! hope you like it❤️

for some reason when i listened to this song it make me think of this fic, even though i would never picture him like this at all😭

tap tap tap.

“you cannot be fucking serious.” you curse softly, placing your phone on the bed as you get up and head over to the window.

it’s no secret that you hate nathan doe, and he hates you too.

your parents are close with his, but nate has always been a little shit.

ever since you two were kids, he’d pick on you. you’d understand that it was friendly banter since he’s, y’know; a boy. boys do that.

but it was never like that with him.

you unlock your window and open it, staring at the boy squatting on your roof. he’s in a t-shirt and gray sweats, his hair damp from showering.

“are you kidding right now, nate?”

“can i come in?” he asks, already making his way through your window.

you roll your eyes. “i mean, you already are.”

he stands in the middle of your room with his hands in his pockets, looking around. “what do you want?” you groan.

he snaps his head toward you. “what? can an old friend not visit?”

“you hate me.”

he raises his eyebrows and glances down your body. “i didn’t see you at the game today.”

“i’d rather die than go to a lacrosse match,” you say. you guys are standing across from each other, and it’s weirdly comforting. you two would be trying to fight right now, but even if you were you’d be too tired to.

“what do you want, nate?” you repeat, this time more harshly.

“why do you always have a fucking attitude?” he snaps.

there it is.

you scoff. “stop with this nice act. i shouldn’t have even let you in.”

“yet, you did!” he says with a high voice, taking his finger and pointing upward.

“fuck you.”

“you wish.”

you squint your eyes at the boy. you should’ve pushed him off of your roof when you had the chance.

“i’d watch that mouth if i were you, y/l/n.” he now points at you. “it can get you into big trouble.”

your next two words were meant to be in your head. “make m—”

in one stride, nate pulls you in by the throat and smashes his lips on yours. you would think you’d want to pull away but no. you kiss back with hunger.

he pushes you against your bedroom door, not breaking the kiss as he lifts the bottom of your band tee to push his fingers inside your underwear.

he pulls away to make eye contact with you as he starts to rub your embarrassingly wet clit with his fingers. he smirks when he realizes this is all from him.

you fight every fiber in your body to not give him the satisfaction of giving you pleasure. not even a lip bite or a buck of the hips, even though you want to.

so. fucking. bad.

he continues to rub at a decent pace. “why so quiet now? cats got your tongue, pretty?”

“don’t call me that, asshole.” you spit back. “i hate you.”

he chuckles under his breath. “seems like it.” he mocks.

the heaving of your chest gets faster when you feel the knot start to form in the pit of your stomach. you curl your hands into fists that are on your sides when you feel wetness drip down your inner thighs. nate scans your face until he figures out what just happened. “came already? my fingers weren’t even inside you. that’s a little pathetic, don’t you think?”

“shut. up,” you say through gritted teeth.

you look down at his sweats without thinking, seeing the imprint of his boner as clear as day. he leans to your ear and takes his hands out.

“feel how hard it is, pretty?” he jolts his hips into your clothed pussy. “it’s all because of you. i can never stop thinking about you, you know that? you’re engraved in my mind and i hate you for it. i always get off to what you’ll look like wrapped around my cock.”

your bottom lip quivers from his words. you don’t know what to say; the only thing you can think about is what you need. you need him.

he starts sucking a mark into your neck while untying his pants and pulling them past his thighs.

he lifts you, your legs dangling at his sides. he moves your panties to the side and starts to enter you slowly.

you pinch your lips together when you feel him all inside of you.

he groans at the feeling. “better than i’ve imagined.”

his thrusts start small but he gradually gets faster to the point where he pulls back and slams back in. you bite back your moan.

“so stubborn,” he whispers, taking your bottom lip out from your teeth with his thumb.

one thing to keep in mind is that your parents are sleeping just across the way, but you can’t seem to hold it in any longer.

don’t do it… don’t do it… don’tdoitdon’tdoitdon’tdoit.

“oh, god, nathan!” you cry out, immediately covering your mouth.

“there she is,” he says. he somehow makes himself go deeper.

“fuck, nate. fuck!” your noises are muffled by your hand.

you look over his shoulder at the window, realizing you never closed it. even though your room is on the second floor, people can still see and hear you.

nate turns his head to see where you are looking at and smirks. he takes your hand off of your mouth.

“don’t hide your sounds. i want everybody to know who makes you feel this good.”

you whimper and look down, seeing how he fills you from the bulge in your tummy with the movement of his thrusts. your mouth drops slightly at the sight. “see how well i fill you up, pretty? see how good you take my cock?”

you whimper again and grip his shoulders, dragging your nails down his upper back. “how long has it been since you’ve been fucked this good?”

“a l-long time.” you moan in pleasure as he hits that spot inside you. “right there, right there! please don’t stop.”

“whose is it, y/n?” he starts. “whose pussy is this?”

“y-yours, nate. it’s all yours.” you cry out. “i need to cum. please let me cum for you.”

you keep blabbing out nonsense as he fucks the living daylights out of you. “gonna cum inside this sweet cunt so you know it’s mine. you’re all mine, pretty. don’t ever forget it, yeah?”

“yes. yes!” you repeat. “i’m all yours. all yours, nathan.”

he kisses you as he spills every drop inside of you. you soon after gush around his dick, legs shaking and toes curling as you do so.

he sets you down and holds you by the waist so you don’t stumble over from all of the stimulation. he holds you in a tight hug and whispers sweet nothings in your ear.

then, the light in the hallway flicks on and you hear footsteps.

“y/n!” your dad bellows. “what the fuck is going on in there?!”

𝐭𝐚𝐠 𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭!

@bunbunbl0gs @lexisecretaccx @thy-mission @angelic-sturniolos111 @sophssturn @mattsneezing @janiellasblog @blahbel668 @meg-sturniolo @hearts4chris @mattslolita @sturnbaby

#nate doe #chris sturniolo #matt sturniolo #nick sturniolo #nathan doe #christopher sturniolo #matthew sturniolo #nicolas sturniolo #sturniolo fanfic #sturniolo x reader #sturniolo imagine #sturniolo smut #chris sturniolo fanfic #chris sturniolo smut #matt sturniolo fanfic #matt sturniolo smut #chris sturniolo fluff #matt sturniolo fluff #nate doe fanfic #nate doe smut #✎ ⤾ haleigh’s requests!

[creedslove]

Mari, what about jealous joel?? Like you're on a girls night and someone tries to flirt or you run into an ex. I just know that Joel Miller is a possessive man and he doesn't know how to share.

🫶

No outbreak!Joel Miller x f!reader

A/N: I love this anon, I love jealous Joel so much 🫶🏻

• Joel is possessive and jealous, he is also territorial and he doesn't like when people get too handsy or flirty around you, but he isn't a jerk, he knows how to separate things so he sees the difference between harassment and flirty

• so if someone harasses you, he goes feral in order to defend you from the asshole who did it, no one messes up with Joel's girl, let alone make her uncomfortable like that

• but when there isn't this kind of violence involved and he sees someone flirting, or you smiling a bit too much at some guy, he gets jealous

• Joel is the sexiest man you'd ever seen, he's the hottest guy you've ever slept and you don't have enough words to stress how much you fucking love him but at the same time he is a little insecure, after all, he is older than you, his hair is going gray, and he doesn't have energy to spend the whole night inside of a packed nightclub to dance or something like that, so insecurity gets the best of him sometimes

• so mostly when Joel sees younger men hovering around you, that's when his jealousy strikes for real, he isn't proud of that and he'd die before admitting it, but that's what gets the best of him and it brings out some ugly feelings

• so when Joel is jealous, it shows in different stages: first, you can tell by his frown, the way he clenches his jaw and he goes silent, even more than usual

• there's a stage in which he still wants to claim you back, so he keeps his hand on you; your thigh, your waist, kissing your temples and pulling you closer

• or if it has reached the extreme stage, Joel will give you the silent treatment and you will hate it, because he behaves like a jerk and leaves you in the dark

• you try talking to him, but he just ignores you, and eventually you give up and ignore him, and let me tell you, Joel is stubborn and that can go on for days

• you don't get why he is like that, he could just talk to you, tell you what's going on, it's not like you were purposely flirting with another guy to tease him

• so the situation drags itself on and on through a couple of days, until he is missing you too much to simply let it go and then he comes after you, looking like a lost puppy and wanting to apologize

• at first you resist a little but eventually things go back to normal with you as you both can't spend too long away from each other in the end ❤️

____

#pedro pascal #pedro pascal x reader #pedro pascal x you #pedro pascal x y/n #pedro pascal fanfiction #pedro pascal fanfic #pedro pascal headcanon #pedro pascal headcanons #joel miller #joel miller x reader #joel miller x you #joel miller x y/n #joel miller fanfiction #joel miller fanfic #joel miller headcanon #joel miller headcanons

[spicysix]

Person A kissing person B in the rain with eddie munson? ❤️

a/n: yeah she's back, the absurd number of italics is here babes. no warnings, all fluff, gn reader, hope you like it ♡

word count: 1.6k

↳ requests are open!

(un)lucky

“Yup, no. Not gonna start,” Eddie growled, punching the steering wheel and letting out a long line of curses. “C’mon, man, seriously? Today? Of ALL days? Today?” he kept asking himself, the van, or God - whoever the fuck was or wasn’t listening.

He rested his hand against the steering wheel, a car passing by him - parked at the side of the road - through a puddle on the pavement, throwing a wave of water onto his door and window. He stood like that for a few minutes, breathing in and breathing out to the rhythm of the storm outside, trying to calm himself.

Sun was setting, he had a terrible day at school - Carver and his gaggle of idiots didn’t leave him alone all fucking morning - and all he wanted was to come home and shred some loud riffs on his Sweetheart, or plan a bloodbath into one of his campaigns.

But noooo, because his old fucking piece of metal of a van had to go and decide to die on the side of the road in the middle of the biggest storm Hawkins had seen so far in the year.

It was the unluckiest day of his life.

There was absolutely nothing he could do, though, no one he could call, and no way he was getting out of the van into that storm, so he just rested back against the cushion of his seat, crossed his arms against his chest and. Waited.

Maybe he dozed off because suddenly he was startled by someone knocking on his window. His neck snapped at how fast he looked to his side, the storm had calmed down into a normal rain, almost a drizzle now. And knocking on his window, hair damp and lip quivering, was you.

You. A band geek, played some kind of percussion instrument and was never seen without your drumsticks, always tapping onto any surface available in your way. Best friends with Hawkins High resident queen Chrissy Cunningham, but had always refused to mingle with the bitches of the cheer squad or the assholes of the basketball team - Eddie actually saw you cursing the daylights out of Jason Carver’s entire family in the middle of the cafeteria after he broke Chrissy’s heart or whatever. A huge fucking nerd, always first to raise your hand to answer a teacher’s question at classes, but was also always sitting on the desk beside Eddie’s all the way back in the classroom in every class you shared. The library’s employee favorite person, and once you left half your books behind and rented some fantasy books for Eddie because he had so many unreturned books already that he wasn’t allowed to borrow more. And he wouldn’t have returned those too if their return hadn’t been an excuse to talk to you.

He was so into you it was painful. He was so into you it was downright embarrassing.

You were still knocking on the window, eyebrows pinched and lips downturned in a grimace, and he finally came back to reality and rolled the glass down.

“The fuck you’re doing there, dude?” you asked and your sarcastic tone was, somehow, like angels singing in his ears.

“Van broke down,” he answered with few words, unlike him and his long monologues, but he always seemed to lose his words around you. “No one to call, Wayne’s already at work, Gareth’s taking his sister somewhere, the other guys don’t drive. There was a storm,” he explained better, looking around you and trying to find your car. Did you have a car? He didn’t even know.

“I know there was a storm, dude, I’m literally dripping,” you retorted (obviously you didn’t have a car, god, Eddie, you’re so stupid), and his eyes widened.

“Jesus, do you wanna come in? You’re gonna catch a cold or something!” he was already opening the door, but you laughed loudly so he stopped his actions and brought his attention back to you.

“I’m already soaked, Ed, not gonna change much.” He fucking hated that nickname, didn’t let anyone call him that. But, from you? It was almost like you were calling him ‘love’. “C’mon, my house is just around the corner, you could call a tow from there. I could borrow my dad’s car and take you home.”

Now you were the one opening the door and stretching your hand to him in an offer. He took it instantly, and you pulled him to the street, cold rain hitting his skin and making him shiver instantly. But he didn’t care, ‘cause his hand was on yours and you were smiling at him.

Fucking Christ, he was a goner.

He closed the van door behind him, and you walked a few steps before releasing his hand. And his mind lingered on those few seconds of touching you, his fingers numb from the softness of your skin, his hands shaking but not from the cold that was taking over his body because of the rain. You looked over your shoulder in his direction, a smirk still on your lips, and he followed you like a dog, your body like a magnet to him, and whatever command you gave he’d accept.

“So, uh… You came from school in the rain?” he asked, just to hear your voice again, jogging a bit to catch up to your pace and walk right beside you.

“Yeah, don’t mind a little wetness.” You winked at him and he almost choked on air. “You’ve been there too long?” you asked back.

“I honestly don’t know, I took a little nap.” He shrugged and you laughed. “You must have a strong immunity if you’re walking around on storms like that.”

“C’mon, dude, I don’t walk around on storms every day,” you snickered, “it was just this special occasion. Plus! If I didn’t walk home, I’d never find you and you’d be there until god knows when.”

“Always a bright side, huh.” He bumped his shoulder into yours and you beamed at him. He hoped the sound of the rain hitting the pavement was loud enough to cover the thumping of his heart. “Bad side is that now my hair’s all frizzy and it’s gonna get knots all over,” he complained, running a hand through his bangs.

You turned left on a street. He followed.

“Who would’ve thought, metalhead and cult leader Eddie Munson, such a vain dude? Worried about his hair.” You were still smiling at him, he knew you were teasing, and he couldn’t stop his own smile from growing wider at every second.

“Hey, it takes effort for it to look so effortlessly good, okay?” He bumped against you again, praying he wasn’t imagining the ting of electricity buzzing through him from the touch.

You stopped abruptly, his breath got caught in his throat, and he went down on a spiral.

Fuck, fuck, fuck, he made a mistake, he was going overboard, he wasn’t respecting your limits, goddammit Eddie why must you be so much, too much, all the time?

You slowly turned your body to face him as his mind went through a billion thoughts per second.

“Yeah, it looks pretty good,” you said, voice lower, a kind of sparkle in your eyes he hadn’t seen before as you seemed to assess something on his hair. Your hand reached up, touched his curls, went further and grasped the hair on his neck. “Real pretty,” you repeated, and his mind went blank.

You were approaching him, your other hand pulling him closer by the hem of his jacket, and he could feel his entire face blushing, his eyes widening, you were so fucking close-

“Is this okay, Ed?” you asked, that fucking nickname he loved only when you said it, the tiniest space between you and him, your breath tingling his mouth, and he nodded fervently.

“Fuck yes,” he answered and you smiled, and he could still feel your smile when your lips finally met his.

His hands reached your face, cupping each side of your jaw, and Jesus H. Christ, your skin was so warm even under all the cold rain that’s been soaking you for so long. And your lips were so warm as they glided over his own, and your fingers were so fucking warm as you scratched his nape. How the fuck were you so warm all over?

And he could die right fucking now and he wouldn’t even notice because he was already in Heaven.

Not that he would go to Heaven when he died, but that’s beside the fucking point-

You were kissing him, tongue now poking at his upper lip and he opened up his mouth to let you in, of fucking course, and you were both shivering and none of you cared because he was heating up from the inside out and you were hugging his waist as his hand got lost in your hair and absolutely nothing could ruin this for him.

A car passed by through a puddle on the pavement, throwing a wave of water on both of you, and you parted from him with a gasp and he still didn’t fucking care, because your hand grasped his and your skin was so warm.

He cackled loudly, head thrown back and mouth wide open, and when you looked at him you had a raised eyebrow and a huge grin on your lips, and he tugged your hand and started walking again.

“Maybe we should do this somewhere dry,” he proposed, and you didn’t seem to mind his assumption that the kissing was going to continue, ‘cause you walked alongside him showing the direction to your house.

“I don’t mind a little wetness, to be honest.” You winked at him again and he laughed again, bumped his shoulder to yours again, you beamed at him again and he could do this forever.

Fuck, it was the luckiest day of his life.

#eddie munson x reader #eddie munson #eddie munson fanfic #eddie munson fic #eddie munson fluff #stranger things fanfic #stranger things fic #eddie munson x you #eddie munson x y/n #lui writes

[altocat]

fuck it, sephesis for all 15 questions

😈😈😈OKAY. LET'S DO THIS.

1. Which one is the better cook

They're both equally mediocre. Genesis is better with spices. Sephiroth is better at following directions.

2. What their love letters look like

Genesis,

I require your assistance in Room 108B tonight. The matter is urgent. I have verified your keycard. Please do not be late.

Cordially,

Sephiroth, Soldier First-Class

Seph,

HAHA Fuck you I knew you'd be the one to blink first. If you wanted a bit of action, I'd suggest someplace MORE romantic would be preferable.

Also why are you still signing your name like that? You're such a tool. Goddess, I fucking hate you.

-Gen

PS: Thanks for spotting me earlier, darling. Dinner is on me tonight. I found a new place I think you'll like. See you soon XOXOXOXO❤️

3. Which one outlives the other, and how they cope

Both of them are functionally immortal thanks to the Jenova cells. But both will have to face the future being completely separated from each other. Genesis copes by shaping up into the hero he was meant to be. Sephiroth...simply no longer remembers Genesis at all.

4.What they do on date night

Wander around the city long after everyone else has gone to bed. Genesis rambles on and on about Loveless or some petty drama he was involved in. Sephiroth simply watches him, quietly smitten.

5. How many kids they’ll have

Gen would like one or two eventually. He's very convinced he can coax Sephiroth into adopting.

6. How they decorated their bedroom

Gen's side of the room is covered with fancy art, scented candles, and a MONSTER of a bookshelf. Seph's side of the room is more nondescript, simply neat and organized, save for one or two of Gen's socks strewn carelessly about here and there.

7 Which one is the worse driver

Genesis. AKA Captain Roadrage.

8. What they argue about

EVERYTHING (they enjoy it)

9. Which one swears more

Genesis. Sephiroth never swears unless it's super serious.

10. What TV shows they watch together, and which ones they hide from the other

Gen has turned Sephiroth on to soap opera and reality television. Sephiroth PRETENDS to loathe them. Keyword being "pretends".

Genesis hides the fact that he also loves nature documentaries, despite the fact that Sephiroth loves nature documentaries.

11. What their first impression was of each other

Genesis: "This is the greatest day of my life he's real he's here Angeal pinch me I'm going to die I'm going to have a heart attack oh my god he looked at me I'm going to marry him my hero my idol my everything ASERDTFHYTREWRTHGREHGFDSDF ANGEAL PINCH ME"

Sephiroth: "He keeps staring at me. I don't think he likes me."

12. What they do for their anniversary

Anniversary spar!

13. Which makes a bigger deal of birthdays

Probably Genesis. Though Sephiroth honestly doesn't even know his own birthday. Really, Gen just wants an excuse to party.

14. What nicknames they call each other

"Pet", "Beloved", "Treasure", for Sephiroth to Genesis.

"Darling", "Dear", "Precious", and "ASSHOLE" for Genesis to Sephiroth

15. What they would change about each other

Sephiroth would rather not hear about Loveless ever again.

Genesis would occasionally like to punch Sephiroth in that smirking smugfuck face.

(Not a thing!)

#asks #ff7 #ffvii #final fantasy 7 #sephcanons #crisis core #sephiroth #genesis rhapsodos #genseph #sephesis #sephgen #fluff #THEM

[glove1]

Husband! Cypher HC (Gender Neutral)

Cypher x Reader

Hi!! It’s been a while! It’s kinda sad to see the Cypher community die out so I’m back! I ran out of ideas and that’s why I don’t post. This one is a bit short but sweet. Requests are open and I will get to them as soon as I can :)

Words: 255 words

————————————————————————

Husband! Cypher always kisses you when he gets home. No matter what you are doing, he finds you like a heat seeking missile and attacks you with kisses.

Husband! Cypher hates going on long missions. He literally counts down the seconds til he can be home and have you in his arms.

Husband! Cypher always buys gifts for you from his trips. Most of the time it’s the regions snacks or food. Other times it’s a little trinket that reminded him of you. You will always treasure the fish keychain he got you from Breeze.

Husband! Cypher loves spending time with you and will drop everything to be by your side. You ask him to cuddle and read with you? He will call in from work sick and spend the whole day with you.

Husband! Cypher will tease you about the littlest things. Staring in his eyes for too long? He will ask “What’s your problem?” and squeeze your face.

Husband! Cypher won’t really show you off at work. He likes to keep his work life and home life separate. No one (besides Brimstone) knows that Cypher has a partner, let alone married. The only trace of you he has in his lab is a mug you got him for Christmas that says “Worlds Best Asshole ❤️”.

Husband! Cypher has always loved you, no doubt about it. From the moment he saw you he could tell you were his forever person. He cried like a baby when you walked down the aisle to him. His heart will always be full of love for you and whatever you do.

#valorant #valorant cypher #cypher x reader #x reader #Husband Cypher #fluff #valorant fluff

[boasamishipper]

my personal favorite highlights from the official top gun: maverick script:

meek engineer's name is simon and is dating someone at the pentagon which is how they found out about the drone ranger coming to shut the darkstar project down

"That's...blue sky up there, Mav." "Yeah, but dark blue. Ominous."

mav also called darkstar 'angel' and 'girl' which i'm glad they cut otherwise i would have died in the theater then and there

"Hondo stares at his monitor. He knows his friend well." 🥺🥺🥺

"y'all built one hell of a plane" oh mav ❤️

"For anyone unfamiliar, it’s obvious there is story here - Glory and ghosts." g o d

admiral's aide do you MIND he's having a MOMENT

warlock is described as "an affable, brilliant two-star" hell yeah

i personally think it's hilarious that cyclone was apparently top of his class in '88 but in the script he's in his forties?? even if he's 49 the film takes place in 2019?? that would make him 18 in 1988?? mr mcquarrie sir the math ain't mathing

"Maverick has had about enough of this shit" if that doesn't just sum up both movies

as a macheresin shipper the fact that hangman and coyote were planned as besties from the get-go,,,,,,,my heart is Full

"sorry i couldn't be there" oh ice 🥺🥺🥺

mcq's love for casablanca continues to shine through

penny's dad is alive and retired and still hates mav

"Keepin’ it tight, I see, Phoenix" hangman is such an ASSHOLE i HATE him (affectionate)

bob's description is "human wallpaper" i am DYING

"shit, that's fritz" i DEMAND to know why fritz's arrival elicited that reaction from fanboy!! show me the fritz&b-team daggers cut!!

"Maverick sees a ghost. From this angle, the kid is a dead ringer for Goose, just as gawky and gangly, loving life." and what if i Bawled

MAVERICK REQUESTED HONDO SPECIFICALLY

HONDO WAS GONNA MEET UP WITH A LADY IN RENO WHO IS 'AN ACROBAT' AND 'VERY FLEXIBLE'

"I need at least one person on my side here" MAV

"I'll stand somewhere else" HONDO

mav originally ran the entire class through the contents of the F-18 NATOPS 👀👀👀

in the original script rooster gave hangman his callsign...personally gonna stick with the headcanon that phoenix (if it had to be one of the daggers) was the one who gave it to him, but Very Interesting nonetheless.

rooster calls phoenix 'fee' brb peppering this into All my fics

PHOENIX IS THE MAV OF THE MOVIE CONFIRMED

I DEMAND TO KNOW IF THERE IS FOOTAGE OF GLEN POWELL SINGING 'HOT FOR TEACHER'

genuinely cannot believe mcq wrote this. he is on galaxy tier levels of thinking i could never even hope to reach.

rooster being protective of phoenix you know that's right

theo the yellow lab was originally named "t" in the script,,,,,,,,t for tony scott,,,,,,,,,

"You're a warrior, Ice. A fighter." bury me ALIVE

"(Note: Important we include PILOT POV establishing gray-out in the lead up to G-LOCK)" this script is tighter than a snare drum

"Kinda like your ass depended on it" GET HIS ASS MAV

phoenix and bob refuse to even IMPLY that mav was in any way at fault for them having to eject,,,,,,,,they are Ride Or Die

as a warlock/hondo shipper i am also Delighted they actually got some screentime together

MAV WAS SUPPOSED TO GIVE THE EULOGY AT ICE'S FUNERAL 😭😭😭😭😭

mav and hangman were apparently supposed to talk after mav chose hangman as his wingman but i'm glad that scene got cut because a) showing vs telling and b) hangman is Not emotionally aware or mature enough to say what he says here out loud and you can't convince me otherwise

"Hondo stares at him. Maverick stares back. Something unspoken passes between the two men." and mavhondo shippers everywhere rejoiced

"HONDO squeezes his fist tightly, feeling something crack. He opens his hand to see the crystal of his stopwatch is crushed, the second hand frozen. An omen." HEY MCQ WHAT THE FUCK

"CLOSE ON Hondo, reflecting on his last moment with Mav." see above

"How we gonna get this bag’a ass in the air?" "Just hang on. Cause this bag‘a ass is about to go ballistic."

"Rough Rider, this is, uh...Ghost Rider" *cries in callbacks*

"The minute Hangman touches down, pull the trip wires and have the barricade stanchions ready." (silence) "HE DOESN'T HAVE A GODDAMN TAILHOOK." (OH SHIT FUCK OKAY RUNNING NOW)

lowkey like the parallel between cyclone nodding at mav and hangman and rooster shaking hands. they still don't like each other, but they respect each other a little more now. as the script says, that's enough.

"Among the pictures is one of Goose and Maverick in the bloom of their youth - their whole lives ahead of them." 😭😭😭😭😭

WE WERE ROBBED OF PHOENIX JOINING ROOSTER AND PENNY AND AMELIA AND MAV AT THE HANGAR I REPEAT WE WERE R O B B E D

"TIME CUT as Phoenix holds two model planes, demonstrating air to-air combat to a very interested Amelia." ooooh amelia has a cruuuuuush

"Rooster turns, looks at the make-shift family taking shape in this makeshift home…And he smiles." 😭😭😭😭😭

#top gun: maverick #icemav #maverick mitchell #iceman kazansky #mavhondo #hondo coleman #warlock bates #hangman seresin #phoenix x rooster #brace #all the cuts and rewrites were definitely for the best but this is a solid script if i ever saw one #mcq deserves the oscar for the 'hot for teacher' line alone

[barry-j-blupjeans]

I loved the mermaid Lup you wrote! Would you ever do mermaid Taako? ❤️

Look. It's not as if Taako wanted to be around humans. If anything, he was pretty content with being actively far away from humans. Sure, they were fun to screw around with. Like, if cha'boy wanted to go up on a rock and lure men into dangerous waters, who was gonna fault him? It's not like they had to be lured. Mermaid and Siren were not synonymous, thank you very much. He was an asshole but not Siren-level asshole, at least.

But when you gotta keep dragging your sister out of increasingly dangerous human-related situations, it's not like you really had a choice. And seeing Lup get captured? That was the exact situation Taako tried very hard to avoid. And even then! Even then, she comes back, with a shitty grin and safe and not too badly injured, and— she comes back, not only wanting to go out again to meet with humans, but wanting to go out soon. Wanting to go out to meet a specific human who wore way too much of that white gunk they put on their skin and smelled too strongly of chemicals.

Like what the fuck, Lup!

But Taako is chill. He's so chill and regular and normal. And as much as he hated it, he couldn't bring himself to say no to Lup. She used that to her advantage way too fucking much, but that was just what he had to live with right now.

Lup's human— Barry, according to Lup. What a fucking awful name, Barry. Ugh— would come out to the water every so often to chat with her. They found a big rock off the coast where the other humans rarely came, so they could talk "in peace". Taako waited nearby, watching with narrowed eyes. Even without fully knowing the language (Barry was "teaching" her. Taako pretended to not care but Lup went over it with him afterward, so whatever), he could see the Tension building.

Taako did not want to supervise his sister's dates. That's what this felt like. He felt like a shitty, overprotective parent who was way too interested in her love life. With a human. Grosseroni. Taako couldn't see the appeal.

Well, Taako hadn't seen the appeal. But today was… different.

He still had an eye on Lup, of course. But being dragged into so many meeting with Barry had made him a little more comfortable with leaving them alone— both because Barry said he'd rather die than let her get captured again and because Taako told Barry that he would die if Lup got captured again, and that Taako would be the one to do it— so we went a little further up the coast.

He and Lup used to hang out at a place like this as kids. A little rickety abandoned dock, so overgrown with weeds and algae that one of the legs had snapped straight off. The wood wasn't too far down, but it was currently housing several little clams and Taako was not about to get into another clam fight. He had enough with the last one, thank you. The dock was short enough to just qualify as a few pieces of wood nailed together.

But it was a good place to hang out away from the sun. He was an appropriate distance from his sister's love life, hangin' below a collapsed dock, trying not to get some clams upset at him. Life was good.

The wood above Taako shifted. He perked up, turning his ear toward the noise. There was a vibration shuddering through the water. He sunk down a bit further as the vibration increased. A few pebbles from the little beach nearby got kicked into the water. There was a muffled sound from above the wood, just over his head.

Here's the thing about humans: They never had good intentions. There was a reason he didn't like messing with them. Hell, the whole event with Lup being captured had only solidified that feeling. They were gross, they were mean, and Taako was good out here, thank you very much.

The wood shifted and Taako saw a fleshy hand wrap around on the boards. He ducked, going a little deeper to swim away unnoticed. The hand dropped the board as he did— fuckin' shadows, Taako hated the sun. He sped away, towards Lup and Barry and the big rocks, only looking back when he had safely hidden away between two big, sunken boulders.

Here's the thing about this human: He was hot as fuck.

He was nothing like Barry. Obviously, humans look different. Like, duh. It's not like every fuckin' catfish under the sea looked the same. Everyone and everything had the ability to be solely who they were. But Taako much preferred the vibe of this guy than he did Barry. Barry looked like what happened when Taako tried to catch a sea cucumber for dinner. The guy looked like if dolphins were as cool as they thought they were. He looked like a barracuda but a cool one and not the one who stole food from under Taako's arms. He looked like the rock back where they grew up, the one that seemed to always stay warm even if it got too cold everywhere else.

He looked good is what Taako was getting at. And he was kneeling, looking out over the sea. He was probably trying to find where Taako (and his stupid fucking shadow) had gone. His eyes scanned the horizon for a few more moments before turning his attention back to the dock. His the sl— slee— arms? fuck, Taako couldn't remember what the arms of shirts were called— were rolled up and he was reaching into the water, taking out pieces of the dock one at a time.

Taako looked back over his shoulder. Lup and Barry were in an animated discussion about some nerd shit, probably. She had her arms up on the shore, flicking her tail back and forth in the water.

He looked back toward the human at the shitty dock, who was wiping some algae off his hand and onto his— his… what the fuck did humans use to cover their legs? Taako didn't know that word yet. With a final flourish, he turned back to Lup and Barry, swimming toward them with intent.

"—so it's less like I'm allergic to milk and more like it'll just fuck me up—"

"Taako!" Lup said as Taako surfaced too, shaking his hair out. Ugh. He knew he was technically damp all the time, but personally, wet hair on his neck did not feel great. "We were just talking about—"

"I don't care," Taako said. And then, "Sorry. Not really, actually, I'm not sorry— hey, uh, do you— do either of you know the word for leg shirts?"

#taako #taakitz #very lowkey still #blupjeans #also not centric but u know how it is w me #lup #taz balance #taz #ise cube writing #asks #musketrois #sorry for how long this took sdfksdf #and sorry to the other ppl in my ask box who's stuff is taking longer #i am at the mercy of chronic pain and work rn 😔 #long post

[universallychaoticpan]

i am in love with your work whaa-

i have a request- if you're free and if you like the idea of course hahahaha- i have no idea if you're comfy with this type of thing, because i haven't seen many people (I've seen none) do this type of stories- because it's always the reader that gets hurt- like man I'm tired of always barely surviving a fanfic 😭😭

so my request is dazai x reader where dazai gets injured or it can be about his scars, anything angsty (again, if you're comfortable with it) it can have a fluffy ending (preferably) but I'll leave that to you!

i love your work and i hope you're doing well <3 sending a lot a lot of love to you❤️

If you're familiar with my work, you know I love turning tropes on their heads, so I am delighted to write this! Also thank you so much for your sweet words, it means a lot knowing people enjoy my work. I hope you enjoy! <33

Years ago, you and Dazai had learned that the lives you led kept you close to death at all times. It took a stubborn will to live that way; it took someone who refused to die, even after so much- it took someone who dared to defy death day after day and continue breathing.

You had so many scars between you to prove how much death craved you. In your skin, anyone could see just how desperately death yearned to claim you as its own. You knew every story in every scar, knew every memory they carried in your skin and in his. You were used to his scars, loved them even.

But god, how he scared you.

All you were aware of was the pounding heart in your chest, a bird desperate to escape the cage of your ribs, to fly away in a storm of blood. But you couldn't stop here; Dazai had already lost too much blood, the gash on his forehead dark and foreboding as you strained against your body to bring him home. You didn't want to think about how long he had been bleeding in the street before you had come, didn't want to think about how he would have been safe if he hadn't insisted on going out that night alone. And even when he was someplace safe, when he was in the familiar confines of your home, you were unable to relax. You brushed tears from your eyes, chastising yourself as you cleaned the blood away. You reminded yourself that tears would not help anyone now, least of all Dazai. But you couldn't bear to look at him; you couldn't stand to look at his face, too still and too soft, void of soul and life. You worked without thinking, watched your hands move of their own accord. You watched your fingers recall years of practice, years of stitches and sutures, and you begged him to be alright. You prayed that you would be enough to save him. You had to be enough

It took you an hour to finish- 60 agonizing minutes of watching for a hint of life, 60 minutes of being disappointed when there was nothing.

You missed him more than anything, then. You missed the man who could always take your mind far from your troubles, the boy who had once upon a time stitched your own wounds and given you your own story-laden scars. You missed the simple pleasure of his voice, the simplicity of groaning at his bad jokes. And with every passing moment, your fear grew; you feared you were too late.

So you held his comatose body close, the silence deafening as you felt your heart breaking. A life without your first love, without your dearest friend- to you it was a fate worse than death.

"You're too quiet. Usually I can't ever get you to shut up." Your voice was thick with tears, but anything was better than the silence. "I used to love the quiet and now you've gone and ruined that for me too, you asshole." You chuckled bitterly, swiping a hand across your nose. "What a dick move, getting me so attached to you, you maniac. You better wake up."

"I won't beg. I won't beg you, because you aren't worth it. But I swear I will never hate anyone more than you if you leave me here." You stared down at his still face, and you broke.

"You bastard," you sobbed. "If you die here I will never forgive you; I swear that much, Osamu Dazai." Burring your face in his neck, you tried to lose yourself in him as you cried gently.

"Please," you whispered. "Please don't leave me. You're all I have now.

Please, Osamu- I'm afraid."

Your head rested gently on his chest, searching for the sound of his beating heart, panicking in the split second you heard nothing in between the beats.

And then you felt his hand come to rest atop your head.

"You know, I really thought you'd be the one comforting me after I nearly died." A voice so weak in your ear had never broken and mended you so surely as his did then. Eyes had never seen right through you, hands had never held you like you were as precious as his did when he brought his arms around you.

And he was smiling, weakly, but he was there once again; like an ember, you saw him fighting to come back to you, to return once again and remind you:

Death would not steal him from you yet.

#dazai x reader #bsd x readfer #osamu dazai x reader #dazai osamu x reader #bungo stray dogs x reader #dazai x reader angst #bsd hurt comfort

[barneyfan99579]

HEY TUMBLR MEET MY HALF LIFE PUNCHING BAG OC, PAULO AND I FUCKING HATE HIM AND I THINK U GUYS SHOULD HATE HIM TOO i made him look as punchable as i could he's 25y.o, 6,0 and a fucking asshole hes the kind of guy to backstab you when you least expect it to know how much of an asshole he is: he. flirts with all the ladies in black mesa even if some of them dont like it, and somehow he found out about gordon and barney's relationship and he was like,hey im gonna ruin that bc im a fucking piece of shit. so he flirts with gordon in hope of making gordon fsall for him so he can dump gordon and break both of gordon and barney's hearts but he never succeeds on taking any steps bc freehoun forever❤️ he also makes fun of barney for bein short ONCE HE WAS BOTHERING GORDON AND GORDON WAS GETTINF TIRED OF HIS BS. AND BARNEY WAS AROUND. SO GORDON PULLED BARNYE CLOSE AND STARTED MAKING OUT WITH HIM INFRONT OF PAULO !!!!!! HENCE THE DRAWING I MADE once the resonance cascade happened his main goal is not to escape, but to find gordon and barney and fucking KILL them. but we all know who would win haha! speaking in that he actually did find barney, but yknow, fastest hands in the west win!!!!!!!!! paulo didint die there though unfortunately. barney shot the wrong siiidee out of stress, but he also shot paulo's d so and he stays alive until hl2 he ALSO joins the combine and becomes even more eviler!!!! but when the uprising was happened guess what. BOOM GORDON AND BARNYE KILED HIM TOGETEHR SUCCESSFULLU HAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA ill talk more abt hl2 him lator

#barney calhoun #half life #hl1 #gordon freeman #half life 2 #hl2 #freehoun #art #digital art #half life oc #hl oc

[elvisabutler]

Girl I just saw a tiktok and I need yaa and I know your busy but when you have time please consider this 😏

https://vm.tiktok.com/ZMFBatAQb/

Fratboy! Austin you know the hot bad boy of college x reader

Love your work can't wait to read more ❤️🌹

ludus

summary: he was a frat boy. you were not a sorority girl. could i make it any more obvious. or how one fateful car wash has you wanting to fool around with a boy who you probably shouldn't. fandom: austin butler | elvis ( 2022 ) rating: t pairing: austin butler x female reader word count: 2091 warnings: faint tinge of asshole austin. talking shit on fraternities and sororities. implications of being a bad boy. faint enemy to lovers implications? there's not that much to warn for to be honest. author’s note: i did tell you i'd eventually get to this. so happy six month anniversary to this prompt! lord i'm so sorry you're a saint darling for waiting so long on this. i'm genuinely not a frat/sorority person especially since the ones at my college always rubbed me the wrong way. i hope you enjoy this and once again, i am so sorry this took so long i couldn't figure out how to start it for the longest time and then y'all know how it goes. also to anyone wanting to watch the tiktok? it's gone but i think i remembered most of it? but that's how long i took on this y'all. the tiktok got deleted. also i don't know if i'd be open to a part two to this. never say never but like i said this whole prompt was really tricky for me and i am loath to disappoint anyone. if you want to be on my taglist fill out the form here.

"What's the harm in enjoying a car wash done by hot guys?" Your best friend asks watching you from her perch on your bed, filing her nails as you struggle to find a pair of shoes in your closet.

"Nothing, actually. Except for the part where you told me that hey it's the frat boys doing the cleaning and you know I would rather die than see a frat boy getting all wet and showing off against my windows." Your answer is muffled in between a sweater you've got your face pressed against and the wall before you let out a triumphant squeal. "Ha! I found them!"

She waits until you come out of the closet holding the shoes in your hand with a grin on your face to say anything back to you. "For someone who doesn't want that you certainly have thought about it. I like them and even I didn't think about them rubbing their chests and abs all over the windows. It's free. Technically it's for charity so they're asking for donations but you don't have to donate."

You tilt your head and let out a soft laugh. "I don't have to donate. I can get a free car wash done by very annoying boys. Just have to drive there," you pause, "okay."

"Okay. Hold on. You- You literally were just saying you don't want to get it done. Like you've spent thirty minutes telling me how much you hate the idea and acting like I'm the devil for suggesting it. What even-"

As you hand your best friend the shoes, you use your free hand to shush her as you speaking. “It means you should have led with free if you wanted me to go do it. You know I avoid frat and sorority things like the plague.”

If anyone were to ask you why you avoided those things you'd like to argue that it was the principle of the matter. Yes, they had to pay dues and yes they had to do all those events and be busy all the time but they also got their own buildings near or on the campus. They got to throw their parties that everyone wanted to go to, including your best friend. They got to charm the administration and got to network and everything that was built into a system where if you were too broke you weren't getting to do it. Sure, some of the members weren't well off- you've met a few of them- but they have the best friends that cover their dues so it's fine for them. It's not that you had ever wanted to be in a sorority, not like that, but they rub you the wrong way.

It also certainly doesn't help that you know half the boys in the frats are trouble with a capital T and well, after one or two run ins with them in class you know to just avoid them lest you do something stupid or lest they do something stupid. The arrangement works out beautifully for everyone for the most part. But you can see how dirty your car looks and you see just how much he needs a wash so sacrifices have to be made in the name of a clean car for free.

The second you move your hand from in front of her mouth her lips curl into a grin. "You know that means I can just lie to you to get you to come to these things now, right? Just dangle free in front of you."

The eye roll you give her betrays just how comical you find the idea before you shrug. "Consider it me trusting you to not be the worst best friend on the planet. If you really are planning on it, though, you can give me back the shoes."

She doesn't give you back the shoes.

The thing about events like this is that everyone and their mother are here. Somehow alumnis hear about it, somehow the surrounding area hears about it and the entire campus knows about it already. It means that you have to block off an entire afternoon for this adventure. Thankfully it's just a Friday afternoon and you don't work until later on that night.

So while it might take a long while to be finished you'd at least not have to worry about being late. The boys had given you the option to wait outside but you felt more comfortable in your car than anywhere else. Besides it allowed you the ability to do an assignment you had been putting off for an embarrassing amount of time. Before you know it an hour has gone by and you find yourself being startled by a rap of fingers against your window. 

"What the fuck?" You whisper to yourself more than anything else as you roll down the window and look up to see the one frat boy above all else you didn't want to see. "Butler? Seriously?"

"Haven't heard anyone call me that since Freshman year. Don't keep up with names do you? It's been AB for years." Austin laughs, before holding up a bucket. "Your turn. You going to donate or are you just here to watch me wash your car?"

The response that sits on the tip of your tongue feels too harsh. It feels like you're going to regret it the second it comes out so you let it sit as you shut your book and set in the seat next to you before turning to Austin with a sneer. "Are you that full of yourself that you think every girl wants to watch you get all wet washing their car before you ride off on your little motorcycle?"

That pause hadn't helped and you still said what was on the tip of your tongue. You almost wince at it before you realize that nothing could have prevented your vitriol from spewing at him. Yet, somehow his smile grows and actually seems genuine, not like the smarmy one you're used to seeing on his face in class or across the courtyard. It's almost endearing in a way. He leans against your car a little more, his head almost able to see into the messy front of your car and you don't stop him. "No, I don't. But I think you might. Most girls didn't go on about me being wet," he grabs at his tank top and shows you how remarkably dry it is, "I know that's what people go for with these things but kind of defeats the purpose of washing your car if I get my pecs streaking soap along it."

Your mouth dries at the thought of Austin shirtless against your will as you're quiet for just a moment. "At least you realize that. Look, I just want my car washed. We're all pretty broke here and I have a shift in a few hours. And I don't-"

"You don't want me to wash your car, do you?" He finishes off your thought with a frown and looks actually a little chagrined. "I'm not- Look I know I have a reputation and it's warranted but I'm not going to do anything to you. If I don't wash it you're gonna be stuck here for another hour because Luke and Kelvin are flirting with the car in front of you. Alton is showing off to the car before that and Tyler- I honestly don't know where Tyler ran off to but I'm gonna kick his ass later. You said it yourself. You've got a shift in a few hours. I've got one too. I wash your car, we both get to be done sooner rather than later?"

"Where do you work?" You ask, trying to ignore how Austin has a point.

He rubs at the back of his neck forgetting that he had gotten it a bit wet holding the bucket. "That restaurant over downtown. Not the one that's always busy-"

"The one that's calm except for the rushes before and after everyone goes to the bars." The words flow off your tongue because you work at the one that's always busy. Austin raises an eyebrow. "I work at the busy one, Butler."

There's a moment where you just look at Austin and look up to where you see his fellow frat boys are doing exactly what he said they were doing and you lean your head up against your headrest. "Fine. Just no funny business."

He nods and gives you a salute as you roll up the window, shaking your head as you open your book back up. Despite what Austin had said about not being messy and keeping himself dry as you sneak glances you see him getting his tank top wet. You see suds and water sliding down his chest and sweat sliding down his neck. It shouldn't be attractive and yet you almost think he's putting on a show for you. You know better, you know that Austin as sweet as he was during your conversation is a bad boy. The kind of guy who takes a girl for a good time and leaves her high and dry the next day. He's never been cruel but he could stand to maybe try and not lead girls on, you think.

You force yourself to focus on your book until you look up again and see his chest through his light colored tank top against your window and start to roll it down, watching as he comically wasn't prepared for it and nearly falls into your car, bashing his arm slightly as he does. "What are you doing?"

He grins, recovering from his almost fall. "Giving you the full package you wanted. Can't do the motorcycle but-"

"Ugh." You groan and shake your head. "I give you a chance and this is what you do. Oh my god, I knew better and yet here I am with you being- you. Just stop, Butler. Stop trying to be charming and finish up. Seriously, I- I didn't want to deal with this for a reason. Should have just waited."

Austin is silent for a moment and looks as if he's gonig to say something, maybe apologize before you roll up the window cutting off any attempt to. Rather than ask you to roll it down he does what you ask and you find yourself leaving the area no more than ten minutes later with a nice clean car.

Later on that night your shift's finally ended and it was a good one, a solid one that's going to allow you to easily pay for some things you've been needing to get for ages. The walk to your car is always a little terrifying and you're always a little on edge so when you hear a voice you almost don't recognize you jump.

"It's dark, what are you even- Fuck, Butler, what are you doing-" Your thoughts are a jumble as you try and calm your beating heart and watch as Austin steps closer to you, trying to calm you down.

"Sorry- I didn't think this through, I- I wanted to apologize about earlier. I'm not- You're not- Most girls sort of trip over themselves for me. Or to be with me for a night or something. You didn't."

Your eyes narrow as you tilt your head. "Yeah, because I'm not the sort of person who enjoys one night stands with bad frat boys with reputations. Or one night stands in general but that's not the point, I guess?"

Even in the dim light of the street lamps Austin looks a little innocent and a little boyish when he speaks next. "Are you the sort of person who would agree to a date with a frat boy who just got off his shift and has kind of been wanting to get to know you for ages?"

It occurs to you that your best friend had to have something to do with this because there's no way this is just a coincidence. Austin looks innocent enough and like he's being genuine in asking and so you let out a sigh. "There's that 24 hour diner nearby. They make pretty good pancakes. Early breakfast?"

"Only if I can show you how I'm sweeter than the pancakes." The words slip out of his mouth as you let out a laugh.

"Just for that. Sure, Butler, even if that was such a bad line. How do you pull any girls with that?"

taglist: @ab4eva, @blurredcolour, @butlersxbirdy, @precious-little-scoundrel, @eliseinmemphis, @prompted-wordsmith, @lookingforrainbows, @araxw, @thatbanditqueen, @ellie-24, @austinbutlersgirl67, @heartbrake-hotel, @ccab, @18lkpeters, @slutforsomegoodlettuce, @dkayfixates, @kendralavon7, @chasingwildflowers, @slowsweetlove, @kxnnxy, @meetmeatyourworst, @purejasmine once again if you don't want to be on a tag list for a series or something, tell me. that was partially what the kink question was for. if your name isn't underlined like everyone else's here, it's because tumblr is that asshole so apologies. also i think i abided by everyone's tag request in this case? it's a work in progress y'all.

#austin butler #austin butler x reader #austin butler fluff #austin butler x you #austin butler x y/n #austin butler fanfic #austin butler fanfiction #austin butler fic #frat boy austin #ally writes

[sudsyv2]

09!soap and 22!soap are such different but wonderful flavors of omega?

09: a captain. he’s settled into his skin. he has enough authority that he doesn’t have to fight everyone to prove that he’s capable. heats don’t bother him any more because he can get whatever aids he needs, discreetly, no problem.

he has no fucking idea how hot he is, and how his ghost isn’t being nice just to be nice. he’s probably the type to accept courtship gifts from ghost without realizing. so they’re stuck because one is not aware they’re courting and there are a number of miscommunications happening here.

22: a sergeant. he is not settled in any way. he can and will fight any authority if they give him shit about his status. heats can get brutal but he’s nothing if not resilient and resourceful.

he is very aware of how desired he is but never entertains or accepts anyone. he will happily take ghost but that man would rather die than be one of those asshole superiors that treat omegas under them like they’re only good for mating. ghost is trying so hard to not be that soap thinks he’s not interested. they are also stuck.

anyway, both can provide nice flavors of idiots-to-lovers that just need. to Talk. Use Words.

YES YOU GET IT ‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️

There’s just so much possibilities for ideas and!!!!

09 is still a capable and strong captain even as an omega. Despite the tough climb he had to do from first joining the military to reaching where he is now, he is resilient and deserves respect. Some have tried using his omega status against him but he still stands tall. A powerful man! I can see many other betas and omegas looking up to him.

Yes captain has no clue just how desirable he is, many have dreamed of having him warm their beds but 09 is almost untouchable.

He’s also oblivious to ghosts courting 😭 he’d be like “I’m too old to be courted, there are better mates.”

22 isn’t as high ranking as 09 but no matter what he will fight tooth and nail against anyone who tries and put him down due to being an omega. Definitely the “talk shit get hit” type even if it’s an authority figure.

Yess he’s more aware of how many people ogle at him but he’d rather play a game of chase than dare to settle down with any other soldier.

Absolutely, Ghost views soap as a partner. And while he does like the idea of soap being his mate, he’d hate to use soap for his own pleasure. He respects soap and would rather die than use him.

Waaa there’s just so many great ideas for both omega 09 and 22 !!!! Love both of them ❤️

#sudsyv2

[borntoocry]

Could you do one where reader and Ellie are best friends and Ellie is over protective of reader, then one day while Ellie is on patrol reader “accidentally” sends Ellie a cheeky picture then sends a message straight after saying “sorry wrong person” or smth and Ellie gets jealous and rushes over to wherever reader is (at home, garden etc) and Ellie is angry and reader reassures Ellie and confesses??? then we all know what happens next.

Btw they both secretly like each other.❤️

i’m sitting here a tiny bit confused cause do phones exist in the tlou universe? (i don’t mean for this to come off as rude!!) BUT, i’ll do u one better. i’ll change it a bit but it'll have like the same plot.

p.s. sorry anon for the late answer. I've been a sad bitch. also, listened to trigger by hayley williams as I wrote this so listen to it:)

word count: 2.0K

YN was a girl not many people enjoyed talking to. She was a ball of fire, except she wasn’t feisty or argumentative, or crazy. She was bright, but not fiery. So… maybe a ball of rainbows: bright, colorful, talkative and kind. No one enjoyed her company because they knew she would ramble on and on about animals, the ecosystem, the books she did and didn’t read. The only person who enjoyed her presence was Ellie. 

Ellie glared at the people who scanned YN–their eyes ready to burst and attack YN if she even got close to them. She  enjoyed protecting YN, because while the girl only saw the good in people, Ellie saw their true intentions. And most of them were never good. 

That’s why, when YN started seeing a guy Ellie sometimes went on patrol with, she tried pushing YN away. The guy, Jacob, didn’t actually enjoy listening to YN, he only enjoyed looking at her breasts through her low-cut long sleeves and staring at her ass in her tight jeans. She was oblivious, because Jacob said all that she wanted to hear. Not only that, but he would eavesdrop on her and Ellie’s conversations, picking up all the things that she liked so he could somehow find them out on patrol and take them home to her. That was the only kindness Jacob held, because in all other aspects of the guy, he was a complete asshole. 

Ellie hated Jacob, which worsened his title of ‘asshole.’ He was lazy on patrol, and one time he left her to die when they came across a group of runners in an empty building. She hated the guy, more than her heart could carry. But YN adored him. 

Which left her questioning her mind. Had she gone insane? Was it just the effect YN had on her? Of course Ellie liked her, but was she sure that it was in a romantic way? YN and Ellie had been best friends since the first day Ellie entered Jackson. They shared absolutely every secret, memory, joke, etc. In the first few years, Ellie only felt platonic love for YN. But when she turned 17, her vision shifted, her heart shifted, and she began seeing YN as a potential love interest–along with her best friend. 

Ellie was sitting outside of a farmhouse alongside Jacob. Ellie was picking at flowers in the grass and Jacob was digging through his backpack. She was starving, but she had a heavy breakfast before patrol, therefore she thought she could make it through the day. So she sat there, ready for Jacob to eat his lunch so they could leave. 

She had a dandelion between her fingers when she heard Jacob chuckle. She disregarded it at first, but two seconds later, the chuckle turned to quiet laughter. She slowly turned her head and saw that he had a polaroid picture between his fingers. 

Ellie’s eyes creased as she tried to catch a glimpse at the picture, but Jacob quickly noticed and said, “Oh, you wanna take a look?” 

“What is it?” Ellie asked, needing to know before he showed her some sick bullshit. His friends were known for being some kind of satanists that performed witchcraft on animals or something. At least that’s what she heard from some kids. And she believed kids–they had no reason to lie. 

Jacob turned the picture around and her heart quickly sank. She snatched the picture from his hand and turned it around, trying to see if it was some kind of joke–but how could it have been? It was a damn polaroid picture. 

“What the fuck is this?” she asked him, her voice loud and clear incase Jacob’s pea brain didn’t understand. 

“What?” he still asked, causing Ellie to reach over and pull his shirt collar. 

“What the fuck is this picture? Did you make her do this?” she spat. 

“No,” he laughed. “Why the fuck would I force her to take a naked picture of herself?” 

Ellie shoved him away and stood up, her fingers still grasping the picture. Jacob fell back and slammed his head against the fence. He winced but quickly stood up as he saw Ellie grabbing her backpack off the ground, his picture still in her hold. 

He followed after her as she grabbed Shimmer and jumped on. “You can’t take that.” 

“Tell me why she took this and I’ll–” Ellie shut up after her sentence, because no way was she going to return the picture. He didn’t deserve it. He was a worthless piece of shit who didn’t value YN’s rambling, her kindness, her smile, and most certainly not her body. “Just tell me why she took this.” 

“I don’t know why!” he exclaimed. 

“Really?” Ellie asked, almost like she was going to pull her gun out and shoot him if he didn’t answer truthfully. 

Well… she did… She pulled her gun out and aimed it at him. 

“What the fuck is wrong with you?” he yelled. 

“Just tell me why this would be in your backpack and I’ll be on my way.” 

“I don’t know!” he yelled again. “Dude, we’re just talking. She doesn’t want to have sex yet so I said we could build up to it. She could start off with taking naked pictures and–” 

Ellie hopped off Shimmer–gun still pointed at Jacob–and walked over to him. “You’re telling me that instead of starting at making out, you just said, ‘Oh! Take a fucking nude?! Are you stupid?” 

“She didn’t want to make out!” 

Ellie shut her eyes and slammed the side of her gun against Jacob’s face. He fell onto the floor and shouted in pain, spilling out expletives as he cried. 

Ellie hopped back onto Shimmer and rode back to Jackson, where she ran to YN’s house the second she left Shimmer at the stables. She rapped both of her fists against YN’s bright yellow door and didn’t stop until she heard an, “Okay! Okay! Coming.” 

She dropped her hands down and dug into her jacket pocket for the picture. By the time she retrieved it, YN had opened the door with a worried expression on her face. 

“Hey,” she said as she looked Ellie over. When her eyes landed on the picture, she placed her hands on the doorframe and began shaking her head. “I already know you’re going to want to come in and talk about it but I don’t want to talk about it.” 

Ellie ran a hand down her face and sighed. “You don’t have to talk. I’ll do all the talking.” 

YN shook her head. “Stop. I don’t want you to know about it.” 

“Well I already do, YN!” Ellie shouted. “Are you an idiot? Why would you do this? Give that jackass a nude picture of yourself?” 

YN shut her eyes at the loudness of her voice and grabbed Ellie’s arm, pulling her inside and shutting the door. She leaned against the yellow door and covered her face in embarrassment. Her best friend, someone she trusted more than anyone, knew about her nude pictures. She didn’t want anyone to know about them, not even Ellie. Because if she knew, she would cry. She would cry because deep down inside, YN wished it was Ellie she was giving the picture to. Not Jacob. 

“Why are you crying?” Ellie asked. She was standing in front of YN now, the picture in between her fingers. She wasn’t looking at it, it felt wrong knowing it wasn’t for her. 

“I’m not crying,” YN exclaimed, but she was. She was simply trying to hide her tears. 

“Yes, you are, I can hear it. Why?” 

“Why do you think?” 

Ellie finally looked down at the picture and studied it. She shouldn’t have, but she couldn’t hold back. YN’s body was angelic. Her breasts sat beautifully on her body, her cunt was hidden behind a small bush, and her legs tried their best to cross one another, hiding her cunt just a bit more. An arm was beneath her breasts, pushing them up as if she wanted to make them look perkier. But YN didn’t need that. She didn’t need to push anything up, suck anything in, hide anything. She was beautiful. 

Ellie placed the picture into YN’s pocket and whispered, her voice broken, “I don’t know why you gave it to him.” 

YN pulled her hands away from her face and let them settle on her collarbone. Her cheeks and eyes were red and her lips had now fallen open, searching for both words and air. Her eyebrows drew in as she scanned Ellie’s face. 

“What do you mean, El?” 

“Why did you give the picture to him? He doesn’t deserve you. He’s an asshole that only wants you for your body and nothing else. Don’t you see that?” 

YN shook her head and wiped her tears away. She straightened out her limp body to appear taller and said, “You sound jealous. Just drop it, El.” 

“No. Tell me why it’s him!” 

“Because!” YN shouted. “He was the next best person.” 

“How? Ellie asked, rushing after YN who left her place against the door and was walking to her room. She had no clue why she was chasing after Asshole-Jacob when she could… Well, she could have her. YN could have Ellie, because Ellie had come to a conclusion that she wanted to be YN’s girlfriend. She wanted to care for her like a girlfriend, not only a best friend. “Please tell me, YN, I’m getting desperate here!” 

Ellie walked into YN’s room and shut the door behind her, as if anyone else lived in this house. It belonged to Ellie and YN, no one else. 

YN was crying but had now faced Ellie, knowing she would finally tell her best friend why. “Because I can’t have you. So I went after someone who was close enough to you. I thought that if I went after them, I’d have a chance at attracting you.” 

“So this was why you placed this in his backpack? To get my attention?” 

YN shrugged. “Sorta.” 

“Sorta?” Ellie raised an eyebrow. 

YN was embarrassed. She threw herself onto her bed and placed her hands on her knees. She was leaning over, feeling like she might just throw up. “I don’t know. He wanted to have sex and I wasn’t ready yet, so I said we could do something else.” 

“What’d he say?” Ellie asked, even though Jacob had already told her. 

“He said we could make out.” 

“And?” 

YN scoffed. “He’s an awful kisser.” 

Ellie shifted. “So what happened?” 

“He said I could send him a picture one day before he went off to patrol.” YN ran a hand over her face. “I don’t know why I did it. I don’t even like him. I acted like it was you I was posing for. I thought that if I just acted like he was you, I’d get through it. But it’s not working out.” 

Ellie walked over to YN and got down on her knees. She placed her hands on YN’s face and lips. “You don’t like him,” she stated. 

YN shook her head with a small smile. “I don’t like guys.” 

Ellie laughed. “I hoped so.” 

YN leaned down and kissed Ellie’s forehead. “I’m sorry.” 

“For?” 

“Giving him that picture.” 

Ellie shook her head and kissed YN’s nose. “It’s okay. It’s mine now. But if you ever–ever!--give someone a naked polaroid of yourself, I swear I’ll rip their body apart.” YN rolled her eyes at what she thought was sarcasm, but Ellie was being serious. “This isn’t a joke. If someone even looks at you because they think you’re hot, I’ll kill them.” 

“Shut up,” YN said, slapping Ellie’s shoulder. “You wouldn’t.” 

“You don’t want to know what happened to Jacob.” 

YN’s eyes blew up and she shoved Ellie away. “What the hell did you do? Did you actually kill him?” 

Ellie laughed. “No!” She lifted her hand and waved it around. “Just slapped him around a bit.” 

“It doesn’t look like you slapped him.” 

“I said I slapped him, but I didn’t say I just used my hand…” 

“You prick!” 

“He deserved it for messing with my girl. Fuck Jacob and his probably small dick.” 

#ellie williams #ellie williams tlou #elliewilliams x reader #ellie williams x you #the last of us #fluff #oneshot #romance #ellie williams recs #ellie williams fanfic

[racfoam]

Can I beg thee wonderful God of writing for maybe a quick little professor gaunt (who harry is now aware I'd voldemort of course) comforting her when maybe students keep being assholes to her and it finally gets to her and she just decides she needs him to be their for her AND HE ISSSSSSS ugh you already know I adore you and your writing but I'll keep saying it cause you should here it!

Oh, this is an interesting idea! Thank you for the kind words! ❤️ I'll do my best 👍 Sending love 💖💞

----------

Harry was just in the library to return the borrowed books by the end of term. The famous rumour that the borrowed, unreturned books flew out of windows to return to their shelves was not one Harry would like to personally witness or trigger.

There were a few whispers as Harry placed the books on Madam Pince’s desk. Harry knew what they were muttering. Nothing new, same old thing they’ve been muttering for the entire year.

Why couldn't they stop whispering and say it to her face? Right. Because that would mean having to look at her directly and say it to her face, giving Harry an opportunity to explain.

Harry walked out of the library. Well, would have, if she didn’t collide head on with Flint.

The universe must really hate her.

Flint sneered down at her. It was nothing compared to Voldemort. Harry didn't flinch, backed away, little less thought of apologising.

“If it isn’t the Dark Lord fighter,” said Flint; just the sound of his arrogant, self-important tone motivated Harry to hex him. “You know, Potter, I'm surprised Weasley still hangs around you. Clearly you bring wizards bad luck.”

“Not as bad luck as you, Flint,” replied Harry, unafraid, unintimidated, staring right back up into Flint’s cold eyes. “Move.”

Flint, apparently, decided he wanted to be put into the hospital wing today, because he didn’t move, and opened his ugly mouth again.

“You know, I'm surprised how nobody thinks you killed Diggory.”

Harry saw red. One moment, she was standing still, the next, she had lunged forward, grabbed Flint by the collar, and drove her knee into his groin.

The groan of pain was so satisfying to hear. It made it worth it. To release all the frustration, the anger, on someone.

Flint crumpled to his knees, hands over his trousers. It was ironic, how easily men could fall, all from a single, well-aimed knee.

Harry crouched down. “I didn't kill Cedric. But maybe I'll listen to all those mutters and rumours and give them something to talk about.” She grabbed Flint by the collar, and growled in the coldest, darkest voice she ever heard herself speak in, “Maybe I'll kill you.”

Flint's face turned deathly pale.

After all, that's what everyone thinks Harry is — a dark witch. All because of Voldemort going after her. Because of Harry speaking parseltongue. And to top it all off, for the entire year, she has been called a liar.

The fear on Flint's face almost made it worth it. Almost chased away the hurt and the boiling anger. It didn't. It was a fleeting relief, not a complete release. The loosening of the chains, not unlocking them.

Harry shoved Flint away, listened to his body tumble to the ground.

Fuck. Stupid, dirty, cheating...

Her neck stung. Something was wrong. Her throat seemed to start clogging, like it was being gagged from the inside by a plug.

It wasn't a jinx. It was a curse that hit her. She couldn't go to the infirmary. It was three floors up. She'd choke on her own breath by then.

No way in hell was Harry going to die by Flint's curse. No way.

Harry knew who could help her before she choked to death. Her heart beat a bit faster at the thought of him.

Voldemort.

Harry ran to Gaunt's office.

------ (I couldn't do the entire scene but I hope this part is all right)

“He deserved it,” Harry managed to gasp through inhaling greedy lungfuls of air to reclaim the lost oxygen back into her lungs.

Voldemort breathed a laugh.

“I don't doubt that,” he said, amused. He was disastrously charming when he smiled like that. A few butterflies fluttered inside Harry's stomach. She tried to wave them away, all to naught. They kept flying around, throwing an entire garden party.

“Thanks,” she said. “I wouldn’t have made it to the infirmary.”

“You welcome," he purred.

Tilting his head, Voldemort surveyed Harry with his red irises. They suited him better than the brown ones. He reminded her of a curious vampire in that moment, with his slicked-back black hair and aristocratic features.

His eyes narrowed. Slender, long fingers — warm, they were so warm — reached out, cupping her chin; he looked very insulted. “Would you cease comparing me to the Muggle invention of vampires?”

A grin lifted on Harry's face. It was answer enough.

Voldemort scowled, serving to amuse Harry more. Voldemort leaned close, his face dangerously close to Harry's now, a severe expression on his face.

“You should treat your soulmate with more respect,” he said scoldingly.

“Oh, really?” asked Harry, fighting back a smile and failing. “I think I’m very respectful to you. If you want to teach me manners, you're going to have to restrain me and talk me into insanity with lessons of propriety, my lord.”

Voldemort shivered.

“Ah, but Harry," he sang her name fondly, a song of the soul. “I like you free and unrestrained.”

Fingers reached out to brush along Harry's cheek.

“I have crossed oceans of time to find you,” whispered Voldemort silkily, breath hot against her lips, red eyes glowing with undescribable devotion and tenderness.

Harry turned beetroot.

Harry tried to say something, opening and closing her mouth. After a few attempts, only a croak came out.

Voldemort laughed; a rich, honeyed sound.

Harry wanted to cover her burning face, to hide herself from the piercing rubies. She found her hands reaching forward, grabbing onto the cloth of his robes.

Somehow, someway, it seemed Voldemort heard all the words Harry couldn't say. He wrapped her up in his arms, pulling her close, to his beating heart.

This time, Harry welcomed it. Harry wanted it.

Harry sighed in bliss. She relaxed into the strong arms, melting into his embrace, burrowing her face into Voldemort’s neck, basking in the warmth of sunlight spreading across her boy. Harry wrapped her arms around his neck, resting her fingers on his nape. The hairs on it rose under her touch.

They held each other there, on the floor, wrapped up in each other, and Harry felt peaceful.

Harry felt happy that Voldemort was here. With her.

#harrymort #tomarry #female harry potter #professor gaunt au #snippets #asks