#because I feel like everyone's sick of me by now

[eddiesxangel]

Never Have I Ever… | E.M x Virgin!Reader

TJ’s 2K Request celebration!

@nailbatanddungeon : “I have a request for youuu. Okay, this is Eddie x Virgin!reader, reader is still new to everything, but there is one thing that the reader needs but is scared to push because the reader is TOUCH STARVED (So am I)”

Cw: reader and Eddie are in their mid to late 20’s, touch starved virgin!reader, angst, fluff, alcohol, throwing up(too much alcohol consumption), hangovers, fingering, oral (f receiving), p in v, protected sex. Friends to lovers

WC: 3.1k

I hope you enjoy!! 💗

“You’ll get there; you’re just a late bloomer, is all”

A late bloomer, you’ve heard it your whole life- and you’re sick of it. Sick of feeling behind in life? You’re in your twenties now and getting absolutely shit-faced because you’ve never done anything in this game of never have I ever.

You, Nancy, Steve, Eddie, Robin, Jonathan, and a few others were at the block party, and you somehow ended up involved in the juvenile game.

“Never have I ever kissed the same gender,” you drank.

“Never have I ever dumped anyone,” you drank.

“Never have I ever smoked weed,” you drank.

“Never have I ever said the wrong name in bed.” That’s rich because you’ve never been in a bed with anyone to begin with.

You hadn’t relized how much you’ve had to drink until you stood up.

“Woah, you okay?” You hear Nancy speak as you wobble.

You had wanted to get up and get more to drink because, unlike the others, your cup was empty.

“Yeah.” You tried to get out, but it sounded more like a grunt to the others.

Ignoring their protests, you stumbled your way back to the kitchen, feeling sorry for yourself.

You fumble with the lid of the hard liquor bottle until a strong ring-clad hand clasps over yours. You freeze, pissed off and embarrassed, knowing who the hand belongs to.

Even in your inebriated state, you get that same feeling whenever he is around you. You feel the heat in your cheeks instantly as the butterflies in your stomach irrupts.

“I don’t think that’s a good idea, Sweetheart.”

You look down, not wanting to see the look on his face.

“I don’t care” you slur. God, you will hate yourself in the morning.

Of all people, it had to be Eddie to come and check on you?

That’s how he was—always worried, always babying you because you “weren’t experienced in life,” according to his words, and it made you mad! It made you seem like a child, and you were sick of people treating you as such. You were a grown woman, you had a 9:00-5:00, an apartment, and a degree, but none of that mattered—not when it came to dating and love.

“Sweetheart, please, you need to slow down.”

“Why?” You rolled your eyes. “I’m a big girl I can handle my alcohol.” You huffed.

“I just think— "

"IM TIRED OF WHAT YOU THINK!" you've had enough. No one took you seriously, and you couldn't help that Eddie happened to be the only one to feel your wrath.

"Woah, okay-okay, I’m sorry."

“I’m sick of everyone treating me like a child!" the dam broke, and streams of mascara fell down your cheeks.

"I don't think you're a child." Eddie timidly reached out his comforting hand.

"Yes, you do."

"When have— "

"ANY TIME WE ARE OUT, EDDIE! Like last week at the bar, I was so close to getting that guy's number and you swooped in acting like my father!"

"Sweetheart I—"

"Don't sweetheart me!" You cut him off once again. "It's demeaning."

"y/n. Let me take you home. We can talk about this tomorrow."

"I don’t want to."

"Too bad we are going." Eddie no longer gave you a choice. He took your hand and started to pull you along with him.

You stumbled, tripping over your feet because your balance was gone completely.

“Woah, see my point exactly.”

“Shut up.” You mumble, and Eddie can’t help but stifle a laugh. You were so cute.

Eddie didn’t mean to make you think you were juvenile…. He admired you and wanted to protect you; you were a woman to him, all women. He liked you; he really liked you. The only reason he swoops in is because he doesn’t want you with anyone who isn’t him, not because he doesn’t think you’re not capable… He dreams about how capable you can be. He just didn’t have the balls to say it to your face.

The thought of you not having any experience never even crossed his mind. He still had no clue you’d never been intimate with someone; he didn’t even know how inexperienced you were until the game. He watched and raised an unknowing brow each time you took a gulp.

Eddie took your keys from your hands and unlocked your front door for you. The whole car ride had been eerily silent. You didn’t dare speak a word without the threat of vomit coming up with it.

You silently stumbled into your home. Eddie followed closely behind. He helped you take off your sneakers. He led you to the bathroom and found some makeup wipes to help you take off your makeup, but halfway through, you turned to the toilet as the tequila made its way back up.

That’s when you broke; you were so embarrassed. “What’s wrong with me?” You cried.

“Nothing is wrong with you, swee-.” But he cut himself off, remembering that you scolded him earlier in the evening.

“Yes, there is something wrong with me! Nobody wants me.”

“That’s not true.” Eddie stroked the back of your head as you emptied out the contenders of your stomach into the porcelain bowl.

“Then why am I still a virgin?!” You sobbed.

Eddie was stunned, speechless. He had no idea. He just thought you didn’t like sharing your sex life, not that you didn’t have one.

So he let you cry into his chest. Your tears stained his shirt, but he didn’t care; he was here to take care of you.

“Come on, let’s get you to bed,” he guided you after he helped you ride your mouth out.

You crashed as soon as your head hit the pillow. Eddie thought of leaving but was worried you would need him if you woke up, so he took the couch.

You awoke with a throbbing pain pounding in your head. You were never drinking again. The night was murky; you started remembering bits and pieces but not everything. You get up and notice the bottle of painkillers and a glass of water you definitely didn’t put there.

Then you remembered Eddie bringing you home and let out an aggravated groan. How could you have been so messy? And in front of Eddie, out of all people? Why couldn’t Robin and Nancy bring you home? What did you say to him? Were you mean? Did you yell at him? You remember crying, but the reasoning was foggy.

You begrudgingly take the water and pills and almost gag, trying to get them down, but you manage. You also smell like a minibar, so you strip and walk to your bathroom.

After a long hot shower, you get dressed and must put some food into your empty stomach.

You walked past a sleeping Eddie, not seeing him curled up in the living room, and started noisily making yourself some breakfast.

“Is that the way you wake up all your guests?”

You screamed as you threw the fork you had in fright.

“Eddie, what the fuck?!” You clench your chest as you take big breaths to calm your racing heart.

“Sorry, Angel”

Angel… that’s new? It’s always been sweetheart.

“I didn’t know you stayed?”

“Yeah… you um. Were in pretty rough shape last night, I didn’t want you to be alone... so I slept in the couch. I hope that’s okay”

“Thank you, Eddie, I’m sorry I ruined your night.” You looked down, ashamed.

“You didn’t ruin it.” He shook his head.

“Well, I owe you one,” you giggle awkwardly. Eddie and you hardly ever hang out one-on-one.

“How are you feeling?”

“Like absolute shit.” You hand Eddie a black coffee.

“Yeah, well, you really went hard in that game of never have I ever.”

You met out a moan of embarrassment. Your memory came flooding back.

Mortification consumed you as you didn’t want to look Eddie in the eyes. You cried in his arms last night after you puked your guys out.

“Oh god”

“It’s okay, Angel. Nothing to be embarrassed about.”

“What happened to sweetheart?” You tried to change the subject.

“You said it was demeaning…”

“Oh god, I did?” You peek up and see Eddie silently nod his head yes.

“I’m sorry, it’s not… I like the nickname. I just…. I was feeling so emotional last night, and the alcohol.” You tried not to gag at the thought.

“S’all good.” He shrugged. But he was replaced to hear you liked being called sweetheart. It suited you; he didn’t call anyone else that, either. It was reserved just for you.

“Um, so about last night, you mentioned nobody wanting you….” Oh god, was he really doing this now? “I don’t think that’s true.” Yes, he was.

“Huh?” You sit up, taking a sip of your coffee.

“You cried about how you didn’t think anyone wanted you, but it’s not true… I want you.”

Did you hear that right? Did you get water in your ears from the shower?

“You do?” Your eyes widen.

“Yeah,” he looks at you sheepishly.

“Oh?” You were in shock.

“Shit-I-I’m sorry, I ruined everything.” Eddie stood up, but you stood up with him, not wanting him to leave.

“No, Eddie, wait!” You grab his shoulder and turn him to face you. You couldn’t let him leave, not now.

“Sweeetheart, please let me be mortified in peace.”

“Kiss me.”

Eddie stares at you before you tell him one more time.

“Kiss me, Eddie.”

Then you feel his hands grip the back of your head and pull you in.

You didn’t think anything could cure your hangover but this comes pretty damn close.

You melt into his touch, his hands cup your head, your hands find his waist. It feels right, so right you think you’re floating.

No one had kissed you in what felt like years, and maybe it had been, but it was worth the wait.

Hands danced around one another’s bodies, and tongues and teeth clashed. It was messy; it was needy.

“Woah woah woah, sweetheart, hold on.” Eddie pulled back breathlessly.

“What’s wrong?” You look up at him, concerned…. Had he changed his mind?

“I think we should slow down.”

“I don’t want to.”

“Sweetheart, it’s okay. We have time.”

“No.” You shook your head. “I’ve waited long enough.”

“Sweetheart, I don’t think—"

"No! I need this, I want this." You look him dead in the eyes.

"You tell me if you want to stop, okay? Promise me."

"Okay, Eddie."

Eddie waists, not another second to take you in a feverish kiss. His hands roam your body, landing on your ass. It excites you so much you can feel the familiar tingling ruminating lower and lower.

You moan his name and press your whole body into his; you need to feel him, all of him… and you can. His hard cock is digging into your hip bone, and you connect your bodies.

Stumbling back without breaking the kiss, Eddie leads you to your bedroom. You fall backwards onto your bed with a gasp.

hovering above you is Eddie. You can see the lust behind his eyes as he scans your body.

"If im doing anything you don't like, tell me. This is about you, okay?"

“Okay,” you breathe as he lowers down to his knees. You watch his hands run up the tops of your thighs before spreading them wider so he can have access to where he wants you the most.

Running his fingers down your centre, you can’t help but moan at the feeling. You are greedy; you want to feel everything all at once.

Wasting no more time, you pull down the stretchy waistband of your pants and yank your underwear down with it. No time to be self-conscious- the need to feel Eddie fueled your desire.

“Beautiful,” Eddie whispered as he left a trail of kisses up your thigh, hovering just above your mound.

“Can I taste you?”

“Yes, please. Take care of me, I want it so bad,” You whine desperately. If you weren’t so horny, you’d be embarrassed by your words, but with Eddie, everything felt right.

Eddie’s lips latched into your soaked pussy, and you watched as his eyes rolled back in enjoyment. He didn’t hold back; he wanted this to be the best head of your life, even if it’s the only head of your life. You grip his hair in your fist, not expecting the pleasure to ripple through you so quickly.

“Taste so good, sweetheart; I wanna live in this pussy.”

“Oh god!” You cry as a single digit breaches your wanton hole.

Slowly, with his tongue and his finger pumping into you, you’re nearly there. Considering how long you’ve waited for this moment, it doesn't take much more. You’re cumming within minutes.

“Good girl, you okay?” he slaps the inside of your thigh and your body jerks.

“More,” you beg. It wasn’t enough; nothing would be able to satiate you until his cock was deep inside you.

“You sure? We can stop if you’re not ready”

“Need you now.” You grab him by the shirt collar and pull him towards you for a searing kiss.

“Okay,” he mumbles into your mouth, crawling up your body.

You loved the feel of his weight on top of you, consuming you with every kiss.

“Want you, Eddie” you moan as your hands toy with the hem of his shirt.

“You have me.” He dips his head lower to caress your throat with his lips.

Your breath hitches when you feel his teeth scrape across your soft, delicate skin.

Eddie didn’t lift his head until he was satisfied with the dark mark left on your neck.

When he unlatched from your throat, you demanded he take his clothes off.

Eddie loved your eagerness; he saw a spunk in you that he could only have dreamed of.

You also removed the rest of your clothing as he stripped.

When Eddie removed his last layer over his head, he couldn’t help but ogle your body, the way your head sunk into the pillows, your breasts, your soaked pussy on display for him. He was devouring you with his eyes.

You motion him to you with a single finger, breaking him out of the trace you put him under.

“God, you’re so beautiful.” Eddie was like a feline the way he crawled up on the bed to you.

The heat rushed to your cheeks; somehow, this felt more intimate than what he was doing between your legs a moment ago.

“I want you,” you repeat yourself.

Eddie cups your face, and you cup his in return. His eyes bore into your soul, leaving not a trace unturned as he searched your entire being before kissing you one more.

You moan into his mouth, and Eddie’s cock grazes your mound collecting your slick as his hips ground into you.

“Ready?” He asked desperately; he needed to be inside of you.

“Yes.”

He quickly got up and you moaned,

“What are you?- oh,” you blush

You see him reach for his pants pocket for his wallet as he pulls out a condom.

Quickly he rips it open, and your mouth waters as he rolls it over his cock. This is the first time you’re seeing what he looks like down there, and you’re getting nervous because how is that supposed to fit?

“Sweetheart? You'll be okay.” He smirks.

Cocky, shit.

“If I have to ask you again, I’m going to do this myself.” You huffed.

“Oh really? How do you suppose that?” He pounced back on top of you.

“I have my toys.”

Eddie’s head drops back. “We will get back to that later. Now I’m going to fuck you.”

“Finally”

Eddie doesn’t respond. He just slowly slides his cock through your slick folds collecting your natural lube before inching his way inside of you.

“I need you to relax, sweetheart.” You naturally clench around him. He was so tickled and long. Never had you felt so full, but little did you know Eddie was only a quarter-way in.

“Fuck you’re big,” you gasp.

“No need to stroke my ego, baby girl”

That made your pussy clench down again.

“Oh, you like that?”

You nod your head, yes, unable to speak.

“Noted”

You could kill him if he wasn’t making you feel so good.

“Eddie!” You scream as he finally reaches the hilt, gripping him like a koala you don’t want to let go.

“Fuck, this pussy is so tight” Eddie slowly works his hips in and out of you; with each thrust, you can feel his bush brush against your clit, and it sends a tingle down your spine.

You moan in response; everything feels like it is on fire; never had you expected this level of sex. No wonder everyone is obsessed with it.

“Harder”

“You sure”

“Yes, god yes!”

Eddie's hips snap into you with such force your head almost hits the headboard. The bed is rocking; you have never experienced something so wanted, so needed, so absolutely taken over by someone else.

“Eddie! Eddie! Eddie!” You chant his name, which only makes him go harder. His fingers dug into your hips, gripping you so hard, not ever wanting to let you go.

“Fuck me, this pussy s'good.” He spits through his teeth. His primal side is showing, and you can't get enough.

Nothing can again amount to this amount of pleasure; you're ruined for life.

"You close, baby girl?" Edie smirks when he feels you clamp don't on his cock when he spits out the words.

A guttural moan is unleashed from your throat in response because, god, you're so close.

The pressure building inside of you is about to burst as Eddie's calloused fingers find your sensitive clit.

"Come on baby, I know you gotta another one for me. I know you do."

Eddies words tipped you over the edge. Your body seized as his thick cock continued to pump into your greedy pussy. Your orgasm took over, and Eddie watched you silently scream for him.

Before you became overstimulated, Eddie also came shortly after, only a few more pumps, and he spilled himself into the condom.

With Eddie beside you huffing and puffing, you couldn't wipe the stupid grin off your face.

"That good, huh?"

"I don't want to stroke your ego, but yeah... fuck me" You hid your face.

"I just did." Eddie rolled over to kiss all over your face and you can't help but giggle.

"I hope we can do that again," you shy away.

"Oh, we are one thousand percent doing that again. "

Tagging some mooties: @littlexdeaths @xxbimbobunnyxx @voyeurmunson @rowanswriting @lofaewrites

@starkeysprincess @strangerstilinski @taintedcigs @mmunson86 @paybacksawitch @stardancerluv

#Eddie Munson x you #Eddie Munson x reader #Eddie Munson smut #Eddie Munson x female reader #Eddie Munson x virgin!reader #Eddie Munson imagine

[pablitogavii]

Hello can you do a Fanfic about Pablo Gavi and the reader are in toxic Relationship but with some smut? Btw no pressure take your time writing 💘💌

They are not in a relationship..yet ;)

Moving in with Pablo Gavi might have been the worst choice of my life. Even though the apartment was in the center, very luxurious and nice, having him as a roommate was the same as having him as a jealous boyfriend sometimes!

"I'm telling you that you're not going out like that!" Pablo was determined laying back in the sofa watching some old Barça game while I was getting ready in my own bedroom.

"And I'm telling you to stop acting like my dad Pablo! Just because we live together doesn't mean you can boss me around!" I yelled back rolling my eyes while messaging his sister. She is the one who suggested I move in with her younger brother so I at least have someone in Barcelona.

"I won't repeat myself, Y/n..you..are..not..going..anywhere" he was now at my door frame checking out my little black dress trying his best to look me in the eyes instead.

"Why do you care what I wear!? Maybe I want some attention tonight!" I said the first thing that came to mind obviously not meaning it..truth be told, I quickly developed a crush on my jealous roommate.

"Whose attention!?" he was quick and I rolled my eyes grabbing my phone but he quickly snatched it from my hands looking at the screen.

"Hey! That's mine! Give it back asshole!" I jumped trying to grab my phon from him but his hand quickly wrapped around my waist holding my down while he looked at my messages with his sister.

"You're dissing me to my sister, bug?" he smirked and I rolled my eyes pulling away and crossing my arms in front of my chest in anger. Pablo gave my phone back when he was satisfied that it was only his sister I was texting.

"Now if you're satisfied, move so I can go"I said about to walk past him but he was still as a statue shaking his head looking down at my little outfit.

"You will get in trouble looking like that at night.." he said more so worried than angry now. I looked him with big eyes using them to my advantage per usual. I quickly learned how to get my way with this man.

"Fine! Do what you want but have me on speed dial!" he said leaving my room and I smiled nodding my head quickly kissing his cheek before leaving for the night.

y.n.bebe

Barcelona, Spain

See ya tonight Barcelona ✨

comments:

juancarlos: aiii mamiiii 🤤

javierbar: i'll search for you in the crowds hermosa

braxtonmall: things I'd do to that body mamiii

gavifans: is Gavi coming???

aurorapaezg: linda💗

y.n.bebe: 💗💗

Pablo just kept scrolling down at the comments of various men saying the most gross and nasty things they would do to me. He was so anxious that he couldn't even pay any more attention to the game so he turned the TV off.

All he could think about is me in that black dress..all alone..with all of those sick people out there. He quickly changed into some fancy clothes texting to ask for my location. I didn't respond cause music was too loud to hear anything, so he called Aurora in the middle of the night.

"Do you know what club she went to Rora!?" he asked and the girl was just waking up from her sleep confused.

"Pablo? Did something happen to Y/n?" she asked

"No! I mean, I don't know! But she shouldn't be out looking like that and alone! It's dangerous Rora! They know she lives with me, so what if someone attacks or kidnaps her!?" he was spirling and Aurora told him to breathe for a moment.

"Seriously, Pablo. You care almost like you're her boyfriend. She's probably fine, why don't you go to sleep?" Aurora said knowing deep down about her brother's crush on me.

"I can't sleep when she's not here...just please tell me where she went!" he said feeling his own heart jump at the words he used. He really cared about me and wished I knew how much.

Meanwhile, the party was getting boring. People were too drunk and everyone started touching random strangers. I was never into that kind of stuff so I decided to call myself an Uber and go home knowing Pablo must be going mental already.

When I turned on my phone, I gulped. Shit! He called me nine times!? Ohh he's probably pissed off right now.

"Pretty girls like you don't need to pay for an Uber, I can drive you home linda" half drunk man walked up to me and I politely said that I was fine.

"What!? You think you too good for anyone but Pablo Gavi!? I have the same car as him, princess..vamos!" he was grabbing my hand now and i panicked speed dialing my emergency contact..Pablo Gavi.

"Y/n! Are you crazy not to answer your phone! Hola!?" Pablo's voice was heard as he was yelling as I tried my best to make him realize I was in trouble.

"Um..I don't want to go with you please leave me alone" I said a bit louder hoping Pablo heard before hanging up the phone.

Since Aurora told him where I was, he was already almost there seeing me in the parking lot pulling away from the guy and quickly braking and rushing outside of the car not caring that he almost cause a car accident.

"Hey hijo de puta! How do you like this, huh!?" he fist punched him and I screamed while he grabbed my hand and pulled me into the car with him before cameras and paparazzi showed up.

"Oh my God Pablo! You won't believe what happened..I.." I was catching my breath trying to talk but he interrupted me rather rudely.

"Callate! We'll talk when we get home!" he said and I gulped looking at his clenched jaw and bloody knuckles..fuck he was pissed off now!

"Come on, let me help you" he said seeing a little bruise on my knee when I fell trying to run and he carried me bridal style onto our shared apartment. I felt my heart beating fast as he sat me down on the sofa grunting a little while inspecting his hand.

"Pablo..I.." I tried again but he shook his head making me shut up.

"Are you really angry with me?" I said sadly but he was in no mood for sentiments. He was scared half to death when he heard my helpless voice on the phone.

"Yes! I am angry with you!" he yelled and I punted curling up in the ball leaving him alone.

"I told you what would happen! Bot Mrs. Independant does anything she wants even if it puts her in trouble!" he was saying it still not looking into my eyes.

"I didn't know that would happen, okay!?" I was angry now too. Why was he scolding me when if I try to be closer to him he pushes me away!?

"What did you think huh!? That you can protect yourself if a guy throws himself at you!?" he said finally looking at me with eyes red from anger.

"Whatever, Pablo! I didn't need your help anyways!" now I was acting out of stubbornness hating the fact that he still looks at me as a child. I tried getting up but he wouldn't let me throwing me on the sofa and hovering above me.

"Oh yeah!? And what would you do if a guy pins you down like this, huh!? Hold your arms above your head? You would fight him off, no?" he was mocking me now and I blushed bright red at the position we were currently in. He was only inches away from my face holding me tightly against the sofa.

"Pablo, let me go!" I said trying to struggle which only made the boy laugh.

"That's all you would do? Please, bug you don't have half of my strenght!" he said and I stopped struggling looking away with a sad face. He was right..he really saved me tonight and I am giving him the attitude again.

"I know what I would do.." I whisper and he leans down turning my face towards his.

"What is that preciosa?" he said looking from my lips to my eyes and I bit my lower lip..fuck it!

"I would call you.." I admit and he smirked nodding his head and leaning further down to capture my lips in a sweet passionate kiss.

"And I would always come..to protect you princesa" he spoke while leaving butterfly kisses down my neck and shoulders while I closed my eyes enjoying the new sensation.

"Mm Pablito?" I said and he raised his head looking me in the eyes.

"Yes mi amor?" he said and I swear something in be broke the moment i heard those words leave his gorgeous lips.

"Are you still angry with me?" I say with a smile and he shakes his head in disbelief shrugging his shoulders in response.

"What if I help you now?" I said moving a little to sit on his lap and he welcomed it curious to what I will do next. I smile leaning forwards to kiss his knuckles and he smiled playing with my hair gently.

"Better mi heroe?" I smile looking up and he smirked nodding his head and leaning down to kiss my lips hungrily.

"Don't ever do something stupid like this again, princesa!?" he said sternly and I blushed nodding my head.

"Now i have all the attention I need at home..from mi novio" I said and he grabbed my neck pulling me a little up before smashing his lips onto mine again.

"How long I wanted to hear you say that mi amor.." he whispered into my lips while we were kissing.

#gavigif #gavi #fc barça #fc barca #fc barcelona #pablo gavi x you #pablo gavi x y/n #pablo gavi x reader #pablo gavi icons #pablo gavi #gavi x you #gavi x yn #gavi x reader

[lesbians4lottienat]

Jealous, Much?

Nat doesn’t appreciate the way Misty looks at her girlfriend. The only problem? Nat hasn’t exactly called you her girlfriend yet.

fem!reader (she/her pronouns used and reader is referred to as a girl), reader is a team assistant like misty, nat is mean to misty because she’s jealous lol

Nat stood on the field, dribbling the ball absentmindedly between her feet. Surprisingly, she was the first to arrive, although it wasn’t much of a surprise to her. She had been doing this for about a week, albeit with ulterior motives. Simply put, she wanted to spend time with you before the rest of the team got there, and she actually had to play. If that meant she had to show up to practice early and, in general, so be it.

However, you were too busy with Misty setting up a water cooler and warm-up equipment for the team. Nat saw Misty say something, causing you to laugh. Misty beamed up at you while Nat gritted her teeth. It probably wasn’t even funny, she thought, but she’s too nice not to laugh.

“What’s up with you?”

Nat startled, snapping her neck in the direction of the voice. Oh. It was Jackie. Of course, the team captain would be there early. Shauna must’ve driven them there.

“Nothin’, just thinking,” Nat said with a roll of her eyes. She wasn’t in the mood for Jackie’s snooping right now. The brunette raised an eyebrow at this before following Nat’s gaze over to the two girls, now joined by Shauna. She sighed before speaking again.

“I know you’re at least nice to one of them, but you should lighten up on Misty! She’s not…that bad.”

Panic surged in Nat’s stomach before she realized what Jackie meant. She wasn’t accusing Nat of liking you; she was accusing her of finding Misty annoying.

“Whatever,” she mumbled, passing the ball to Jackie, whose brow furrowed in concern at the blonde's lack of bite in her words.

The rest of the team arrived at the soccer field one by one. They performed their usual warm-ups before playing a practice game. The entire time, however, Nat was distracted. She wasn’t performing well, and everyone could tell something was wrong. Hopefully, they didn’t notice that she faltered every time Misty grabbed a hold of your arm or brushed hands with you.

Eventually, Coach Scott pulled her aside and asked if she was alright. She hated how he looked at her and the way they all looked at her. She hated feeling weak.

After a few more easy shots were missed, her coaches and teammates suggested she take a breather. It was annoying. What was even more annoying, though, was the way Misty looked at you—so full of love and adoration. It made Nat sick to her stomach.

“God, Misty, can you keep it in your pants? Some of us are trying to focus here!”

Misty’s face flushed a bright red. Nat huffed at the confused looks before storming off in the direction of the locker room.

She stomped inside, slamming her locker open and pulling her jersey over her head. She began changing into her regular clothes but paused when she heard a familiar voice.

“What the hell was that?”

It was you. Of-fucking-course.

“Why do you even care?” she seethed, refusing to look in your direction. She resumed changing and angrily threw her uniform into the locker.

“Because you confused the hell out of everyone? And because you almost made Misty cry? And because you won’t even look at me?”

Part of her was happy to know she had almost made Misty cry, but the other part swirled hatefully in her gut at the concerned tone of your voice when recounting the event. She hated it. Hated how nice you were to Misty.

There was an awkward pause as Nat gathered her things until, eventually, you spoke again.

“Nat, come on. Talk to me?”

Nat hated you. She hated your stupidly affectionate, concerned voice and how well it worked on her.

“She was clearly flirting with you!”

“…what?”

“What,” she starts, “Were you just going to let her feel you up like that?”

You stared at Nat, utterly confused, before it clicked.

“Oh my god. Are you fucking jealous, Scatorccio?”

Nat’s nostrils flared, and her cheeks flushed. She quickly walked towards you, trapping you in the corner of the room. She glared, opening her mouth to speak, but you promptly cut her off.

“You have no right to be acting like this, you asshole! You don’t even want me!”

…what?

She must’ve verbalized her confusion as you seemingly grew angrier.

“You kiss me at Jackie’s party, then you avoid me for a week. You flirt with me early before everyone gets here, then act like I don’t exist. You’ve made it abundantly clear that you don’t like me like that, but now, you’re acting like I’m taken?”

Nat freezes. She glowers up at you, her lip trembling. You stare back, visibly upset. Then, she pulls on your jacket, smashing her lips against your own. You let out a muffled noise of surprise before kissing back, wrapping your arms around Nat’s neck while Nat’s hands land on your hips.

Eventually, you two pull away, breathless. Nat speaks first.

“You’re mine, okay?”

You raise an eyebrow.

“That’s a terrible way to ask me to be your girlfriend.”

Nat stiffens. She’s…new to this. She’s never really labeled a relationship like this with a girl. But, judging by how it makes her heart flutter, she wouldn’t mind calling you her girlfriend.

“S-sorry,” you stutter, “I didn’t- I didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable, or, like-“

“Shut up and kiss me.”

#yellowjackets x reader #natalie scatorccio x reader #nat scatorccio x reader #rosie’s writing 🐝 #this is one of my first times posting my writing so please be nice #:’D

[happilysmythe]

❥ 𝙥 𝙥𝙤𝙬𝙚𝙧

trent frederic.

word count: 4.2k

warning: explicit content

"she wet in the shower" — gunna

A/N: this was an anonymous request for trent smut w/ a college student. so of course, i had to add some angst—makes it more fun. not to mention how much i love him, so who am i to deny it?! hope you enjoy! :)

- - -

“Do you think you’ll be able to come out soon?”

Trent’s hopeful tone of voice rang through the phone as you held it up to your ear, sitting comfortably in the quiet bedroom of your apartment. A pang of guilt washed over you. You already knew the answer, and it wasn’t the one he was looking for.

He and you first met when you were a freshman in college. He was a sophomore. You started dating quickly after. Now, you were a senior and he was playing in the NHL halfway across the country. But you lived in Wisconsin, so it wasn’t often that you got to see each other. It was difficult for him to visit during the team’s breaks, especially when the rest of his family was based in St. Louis. And you, on the other hand, were far too busy with work and school to make the extensive trips out.

“I don’t think so,” you finally sighed, pulling your knees into your chest. “I’ve been so busy, and I just—fuck, I miss you, but I can’t. And I’m so tight on money right now.”

“I’ll pay for it,” he pushed.

“Trent, I can’t,” you frowned, resting your chin on your knee. “Believe me—if I could, I’d already be there by now. It’s just…too much.”

A beat of silence followed, and you could practically picture the dejected look on his face. You knew he was still there—the soft noise of his breathing that came through the receiver told you so—but he waited to speak. He was running through any possible solutions in his head, yet not a single one was worthy of voicing.

“I want to see you,” he finally spoke. “I’m sick of only talking to you through the goddamned phone. It feels like this isn’t even real anymore.”

“Not real?” you asked, lips parted in shock. “Trent, what part of this isn’t real?”

“I—I don’t know. Look, I,” he breathed, “it’s just hard to watch all of the guys have their girlfriends here while mine is eleven hundred miles away and has barely even met any of them, alright?”

“Oh,” you spoke quietly, nodding your head as you took in his words. “So that’s it, huh? That’s the problem, isn’t it?” You fell back against your headboard, “You finally admit it, then. It’s because I’m not like them.”

“I never—”

“Oh, save it, Trent!” you shouted. “We knew this was what it would be like when the time came and we agreed to stay together. We agreed to make it work. Do you have any idea how much I’ve sacrificed to even be able to visit and see you when I do?”

You swallowed thickly, “I have juggled so many things in the past year and all I wanted was a little bit of sympathy from you. Christ’s sake, Trent, I know it sucks. I know, okay? But I am trying so goddamn hard to find the time to just talk to you like this right now!”

“That’s my whole point,” he retorted firmly, his voice irritated. “It’s like I never see you anymore. And when I come back, I have to decide between seeing you or my family, and you always make me choose them. So it’s pretty fucking frustrating to see everyone else have their girlfriends or their wives there when you barely get to talk to yours,” he took a breath. “This barely feels like anything anymore.”

“What, so you’re just going to act like I’ve never done anything for you? Like I haven’t been working day in and day out to make as much time for you as I can? I did everything for you when you still went to school here and this is the thanks I get?” you firmly stood your ground. “Yes, Trent, I know I’m not there. I know that. And god, I miss you more than anything—”

“Then come.”

“Jesus Christ, Trent, I can’t!”

You shook your head and sat up on your bed once more. You could only be thankful that you lived alone in your off-campus apartment, with all the back and forth you were having. “You can’t come here, and I can’t go there. That was the understanding when we agreed to make things work,” you lectured. “And trust me, it hurts me too. Fuck, it hurts to see people I don’t even know with their boyfriends. So don’t act like you’re the only one who’s hurting from this.”

“If this is making it work, then I don’t know what to do anymore.”

“Trent—”

“I’m just,” he shook his head, “god, I’m tired of this.”

Tears pricked at your eyes, the fear of what he’d say next slowly beginning to tear at your heartstrings. Although you hadn’t seen much of each other in recent years, Trent meant the world to you. He’d done just about everything in his power to keep you happy before he moved. And even after, he tried to see you as much as he could; as much as time would allow.

So the thought of what he might’ve been getting at made you sick to your stomach.

“You cannot put this on me,” you told him through the phone, fingers tightly gripped around the metal as if dropping it would make you lose him for good. “You have no. Right,” you swallowed, nostrils flared and teeth gritted. “It’s so fucking unfair.”

“You know what’s unfair?” His question lingered in the air, and you kept your mouth shut. It wasn’t something that you were meant to answer. So you waited.

“Being forgotten.”

And that was your final straw.

“Fuck you,” you sobbed, a tear cascading down your cheek. “If this whole long-distance thing wasn’t enough for you, then you should’ve just broken it off before.”

“I just wanted to see you.”

“Yeah, well, I’m not the one that left you, Trent.”

Your phone was face down on the bed almost instantly after you hung up. Any emotions you were desperately trying to suppress came to the surface, bringing you to tears as you buried your face into your knees. It all finally came to a head, and you couldn’t bear the outcome. Heavy sobs left your lips, pried relentlessly from your throat as guilt ripped through you. Your body refused to let up for even a second; not until every last drop of emotion was ripped from you.

And finally, once it was, you lay restless in your bed until morning, mind unable to escape the intruding idea of never seeing him again.

Hours turned into days, days into weeks of not hearing from him. Since that night, you began to work yourself harder, picking up hours to fill up the time you’d be alone. You couldn’t let yourself think about it, or else you’d break.

It had been almost a month since. You heard a knock on your door as you were headed for the bathroom, about to shower after another long shift. You were prepared for it to be another one of your friends. They’d been showing up at your door for days, trying to break you out of your funk, which only irritated you further. You sighed and tightened your robe, then walked to the door and swiftly opened it. 

“For the last time, I’m fine—”

It wasn’t your friends.

Surprise laced your expression. Trent was standing on the other side of the doorway, hands stuffed into his pockets. His body was tense as he stood silently.

“Trent,” you finally whispered.

He stepped closer, eyes boring into yours when your head tilted back to look at him. His lips parted to speak, but you gave him no such chance when you threw your arms around him. Any emotions that you’d suppressed immediately surfaced, tears streaming down your cheeks as you buried your face into his chest.

“Shh,” he cooed, hands rubbing gently up and down your back.

His hand came up to your cheek when you pulled back, using his thumb to gently wipe it dry. The warmth of his touch radiated through the skin and you felt a sense of familiarity, of comfort being in his hold again.

“I’m so sorry,” you cried softly, your arms tightening around his midsection.

“God, no, don’t,” he hesitated, brushing a strand of hair behind your ear, “please, don’t apologize. None of this is your fault.”

He frowned, “It’s mine. I shouldn’t have acted like such a baby.”

“But I just got angry. I didn’t even consider how you’d—”

“Hey,” he sternly interrupted, pulling your body into his. “This was on me. I knew how busy you’d be when we decided to stay together. I was upset that I couldn’t see you and I blamed you for that,” he breathed. “You didn’t deserve that. Not after everything you’ve done to make this work. I didn’t do my part.”

Another tear fell from your eye, burning the skin in its path. “I wasn’t trying to make you feel like this wasn’t real anymore,” you frowned.

“You didn’t do anything wrong. I’m just…dumb.”

“And I blamed you for leaving when you had no choice.”

He sighed deeply, urging your head to his chest. “It’s only a month left until you’re out, right?” he asked and you nodded, confirming his inquiry. “Okay. So we only have to tough out one more month of this…And then it’s over.”

“I’m so sorry,” he whispered.

“It’s okay,” you finally spoke, leaning into him. “I am, too.”

You finally leaned up to kiss him and he quickly reciprocated, pulling your chest flush against his. His head craned to the side, deepening the kiss and turning it into something more than just making up lost time. You jumped into his arms, wrapping your legs tightly around his waist. He hummed against your lips, fingers gripping the underside of your thighs to support your weight.

“I was about to,” you muttered between kisses, “shower.”

“Explains the robe.”

He began walking forward, carrying you down the hallway as you remained perched on his waist. The soft material of the robe slid off of your thighs, exposing them to the cool air and allowing you to feel his bare palms around them. The ring that sat on his right index finger dug into the soft skin as he reached the door to your bathroom. 

“Got room for one more?” he teased as he lowered you to your feet.

“Maybe,” you giggled in response, hands resting atop his shoulders. “Who’s asking?”

His fingers toyed with the belt on your robe, slowly beginning to loosen it around your waist. He lowered his head, forehead nearly touching yours, and softened his voice, “Someone who hasn’t been alone with his girlfriend in a long time.”

“Hm,” you considered, fingers dancing along the back of his neck, “I think something can be arranged, then.”

The robe’s soft fabric fell open as he let go and brought his hands to his shirt, removing it in one go. With that, you slipped the rest off and stepped into the shower, then quickly turned on the water as he rid himself of the rest of his clothing. As you waited, you shampooed your hair, thoroughly rinsing it out and basking in the warmth of the water over you.

It wasn’t long before the curtain opened and in stepped Trent, who had discarded all but his silver chain, including the ring he wore just moments before.

“God, have you gotten bigger?” you asked, hands traveling up his arms. “Or has it been that long?”

“Maybe you’ve just gotten smaller.”

You rolled your eyes promptly, chuckling softly before leaning up to kiss him again, allowing the hot water to cascade slowly down your back. You flipped your bodies around and his hair grew darker as it slowly dampened, curls dissipating as they flattened atop his head. You were quick to run your hands along his upper body, palms grazing the skin of his chest down to his stomach. Your touch earned a groan of approval from his lips as you and your body swiftly moved down.

Down to your knees, even, right in front of him.

A few soft, teasing kisses were pressed to his tip before you drew his cock into your warm mouth. A large hand snaked into your hair, roughly gripping the wet strands as he turned just slightly, back now facing the wall. The hot water coated his body, allowing your lips to glide smoothly along his length, teeth lightly grazing the skin.

“Fuck, I missed you,” he drawled, hand setting your pace as the steam from the water rose up around you.

Slowly, he began to pump his hips, tip hitting the back of your throat with each gentle thrust. His head drew back, pressing against the cool, wet tile as he sucked air through his teeth. Your nose nearly came into contact with his pubic bone as you took as much of him as your mouth would allow. But as much as he would’ve wanted to, he refrained from forcing you down.

Instead, he relished in the feeling of your pretty little mouth wrapped around his cock again for the first time in months.

Deep breaths left his mouth in the form of groans, his lips parted and face contorting with pleasure. Soon his head was off the wall again as he looked down, driven wild by the sight before him—his girlfriend on her knees in front of him, looking back up at him through tattered lashes, sporting stains of mascara that ran down her cheeks. 

It was nearly enough to send him over, and you felt him growing more tense. The grip on your hair tightened as he sped up your pace just slightly, a choked moan escaping your lips and humming against his skin. His free hand darted out and pressed firmly against the fogged glass door, aiding him in maintaining any sort of composure he could conjure up.

Just as he was about to warn you of how close he was, you slid him out of your mouth. When your eyes flitted up, they were met with his disapproving glance, chest rising and falling as he breathed deeply.

“Why did you stop?”

“To irritate you,” you scrunched your nose. “But mostly to tease you.”

Light kisses were intricately pressed to his tip, the action just perfectly denying him enough sensation to fulfill his needs. But enough to make him ache with want, with need; the need of release. Of breaking the taut line holding him together. He was on the brink, and you knew it, but you were denying him.

How cruel.

Maybe it was a form of payback for the argument he started a few weeks before. For making you think you were broken up for all that time. Something like that, he convinced himself. All he knew was that you had every intention of making him wait, and he had no choice but to accept it.

“Mm,” you hummed, the fingers of one hand curling around his length and the others around his thigh as your lips trailed the same torturous kisses down to the base and back up. His hand brushed through the dripping wet strands of dark ginger hair atop his head, feet planted deeply into the floor below him.

Unfortunately for you, he wasn’t the only one who craved his release. And fortunately for him, you were finally willing to give him the satisfaction.

So you drew just the head back into your warm mouth, tongue swirling around the swollen area tactfully. Soft lips glided along his skin as you slid them further down on him, and the line finally snapped like a twig. The aftermath flooded your senses, his taste gathering on your tongue as the sound of his groans filled your ears.

And his traces went smoothly down your throat with a prompt swallow.

“Fuck,” he finally managed, eyes following you as you rose to your feet.

“That,” you started, licking the remainder from the corner of your mouth, “was for that phone call.”

“Yeah?” he asked, a smirk settling in on his face.

“Mhm,” was your sharp-tongued response, bringing a grin to his lips. You reached for the conditioner, “And you deserved it.”

He nodded as you squeezed a bit into your hand, afterward lathering it in your hair. He brought his hands up to your head and tilted it back, using his fingers to rinse out the cream gently.

“Maybe I did,” Trent hoisted you up, an involuntary gasp falling from your lips.

“—But now it’s my turn.”

Your back pressed against the cool tile as he turned your bodies to the side, water now hitting him at an angle as he pinned you up. You breathed out sharply from the force at which you hit the wall, lips parting as your gaze fell on his grin-inhabited face. 

The heat formed beads of sweat on both you and Trent’s foreheads, mixing with the hot water as it continued to fall behind his body. He leaned up and connected his lips with yours, a hand running through your equally wet strands before sliding down your tense figure. The other locked fingers with your own and roughly pressed the back of your hand against the tile above your head, drawing a needy moan from your throat.

Your free hand slid up his front and came into contact with the cold, wet metal of his chain. God, you loved it. And he knew it, which was why he never took it off at moments like this; whether it was the tag tapping against your cheek as he thrust into you or it pressing into your skin as your back arched against him, or even just the sight of it poking out from under his shirts, it set you ablaze, similar to many other things about him. Like his hair. Or his hands.

Or the head of his cock as it dragged along your soaked folds, teasing you until you begged for more.

Which, oddly enough, was exactly what was happening to you then. 

“Trent—fuck,” the words weakly fell, “please.”

His lips were at your neck, working the soft, damp skin just as you did to his body just minutes before, only now the added pressure of him at your entrance came into play.

“What is it, hm?” he mumbled, trailing down to your collarbones and back up.

“Need to feel you,” you breathed heavily, “now.”

Lips stretched into a grin against your skin just before he pushed himself into you, allowing you to sink down onto him properly. Your hands quickly lifted and tenaciously gripped his shoulders for stability. His head lifted from your neck and fell back, mouth open as he exhaled deeply from the pressure of you enveloping him. He was hardening at an unfaltering rate from the sensation, and his mind was running a mile a minute.

Because no effort he made to relieve himself when he was alone could ever replace the feeling of your inner walls constricting around him.

And fuck, did he miss that feeling.

Finally, your boyfriend was buried inside you again. Finally, he was stretching you out again, occupying every last inch of space that your body would allow. The feeling was all too familiar, but that was what you loved most; how perfectly he fit you, and how it was still able to make you see stars, regardless of how many times you’d felt it before.

His hips instantly moved in a controlled rhythm, leaving no time to exchange pleasantries. Hard thrusts drove your vulnerable body up the wall, large hands now having moved to your hips, fingers pressing firmly into the wet skin. 

He wasn’t going to waste any time taking things slower, softer as he normally would. Oh, no—there was no time for that. He needed you oh, so desperately at that moment—to take you. Hard. Fast. That’s what months of deprivation did to a guy like him; a guy who hadn’t felt the touch of his girlfriend in so long that it hurt.

Luckily for him, he wasn’t the only one starving with want.

So the payoff was all the sweeter for the both of you as each torturous thrust forced the tip of his strained, desperate cock to brush just against the right spot within you. Various expletives filled the fogged air of the bathroom, sounding in the form of your weakened voice. Nail-shaped craters formed on the skin of his back while he roughly pistoned his hips forward and back, relentlessly pushing your back against the slick wall behind you.

“So glad you live alone and not on that fucking school ground,” he mumbled, pressing kisses to your exposed shoulder.

Usually, he was more gentle with you, and you’d grown accustomed to that. You liked it that way. But you couldn’t deny how much you loved, in contradiction, the times he decided that gentle wasn’t enough. That it simply wouldn’t do. When all he could think of was the burning desire to pin you to the wall and fuck you dumb with pleasure because he was so damn starved from not seeing you as often as he should. Because he knew better than anyone else that you could take it.

You’d no doubt have prints on your back from the incessant pressure of him pressing you against the tile behind you, and you briefly considered the thought. It left your mind quicker than it came, however, because it wouldn’t be the only thing left behind on your body from the exchange that night. 

They’d pair nicely with the marks that extended from your neck to your collarbones.

“Close, Trent,” you muttered, head falling forward and resting atop his shoulder. “I’m…fuck, I’m close.”

A phrase that had become so familiar to him, so routine, as if it were some sort of perverted Bible verse you’d been trained to memorize. One that he’d never get sick of hearing because he knew that every time he was the reason for it.

Of course, you didn’t have to say it, because he already knew you were there. And if you weren’t, someone ought to have explained to him why you felt so tight, all of a sudden.

“Come on, baby,” the words rolled off his tongue languidly, “let go.”

So you did, clenching around him and crying out with a weakness that laced your voice. White hot pleasure surged through your body as he fucked you through it, his thick cock continuing to provide you more pleasure with each calculated thrust than any store-bought substitute could manage. Calloused fingers grasped urgently at the swell of your hips, the hold on you firm enough to keep you stable as you shattered around him for what felt like the first time in years.

Not a moment was wasted before ropes of hot liquid emptied into your stomach, thoroughly coating your waiting, sensitive inner walls. A satisfied groan exited his lips, the sound low in your ear, and you were sure it was the hottest thing you’d ever heard. A hand traveled up to his wet locks, pushing his head forward and allowing your mouth to envelope his in a deep kiss as his hips slowly, carefully came to a stop. 

His tongue explored your mouth as if it had never been in its vicinity before, head tilting to give himself easier access. Meanwhile, he pulled out and began to lower you down, the muscles in his arms straining as they held you up for support. Your feet were once again planted on the wet, slippery floor of the shower as your spent body remained still between his large frame and the tiled wall behind you.

He pulled away and stepped back, sliding his hands off you as he turned the knob behind him to increase the water’s temperature. Then, he moved in the stream’s direction, arms reaching outward and pulling you toward him. Your back quickly came into contact with his firm chest, metal pressing against the now patterned skin as his hands placed themselves atop your slick skin.

A pair of soft lips peppered gentle kisses from your neck down to your shoulder, fingers rising to brush your hair away. The scalding hot water hit his back and extended to your exposed shoulder blades, effectively relaxing the tense muscles of your worked bodies. After all, it had been quite the bit of time since either of you had been in such a position.

“I love you,” he murmured, lips brushing against the skin of your ear as his hands ran down along your arms beside you.

Your head fell back against his chest, “I love you, too.”

He leaned down to press another kiss to your lips, arms wrapping around your waist and his hands finding purchase on your stomach, allowing him to inch your body closer to his. Both his and your eyes then fell shut as you settled into him.

It was all so…intimate; intimate in large contrast to the last time you spoke to him before he showed up at your door looking for forgiveness. And of course, he received it, because the whole disagreement was fueled by the sole fact that he simply missed the woman he loved.

The same woman who stood in his embrace as they fell into a comfortable silence, minds focused only on the sound of the water and the steam slowly rising around them.

#trent frederic #trent frederic fic #trent frederic imagine #trent frederic smut #trent frederic x reader #boston bruins imagine #boston bruins #hockey fic #hockey #fanfic #t. frederic

[drdemonprince]

also a good-faith question: what do i tell some of my friends who are terrified of the collapse of the current system for like, survival reasons? like in ways that mutual aid and community support can't really help.

i was trying to explain all this stuff to my friend the other day who is on government support and needs a lot of intensive, expensive medical intervention to live, and she accused me of being willing to sacrifice disabled people for the sake of ideological purity but like, i wasn't saying she doesn't deserve to live, but that she doesn't deserve to live more than palestinians do? and that she also doesn't deserve to specifically live on stolen land. and like, there are palestinians who also could really use those medical treatments that she has the privilege of accessing, why does she deserve them more?

she said she can't afford to not care about the election results because if anything happens to the aca or medicaid, or if anything happens to the medical supply chains, then she's fucked. like, yeah, but same goes for all these people our country is oppressing??

i feel like i just didn't explain this well and i want to give her some other stuff to read.

Great question! I think when people believe that all social care systems will collapse without the government, they are buying into a very colonialist idea that human beings are at their most basic level selfish and irresponsible and won't care for their communities. This is not the case! Thousands of years of human history prove this not to be the case, and so do the behaviors of humans right now during moments of crisis.

Look to the people of Gaza -- they are not leaving their disabled behind. People are sacrificing all that they have to care for their elderly relatives, neighbors, and friends. The only reason that disabled people in Gaza are dying is because the region is being deliberately deprived of resources by Israel. If aid were let in and the Palestinian people were free, they would feed their hungry, treat their sick, supply insulin, teach children, and perform everything that we currently in the US rely upon the government to supply.

Another example of this can be found in how humans respond to natural disasters. Rebecca Solnit's book A Paradise Built in Hell is a beautiful read on this, following numerous real-life disasters across the globe. In every case, people did not riot and pillage or dissolve into violence--- they formed stable encampments, doctors and pharmacists worked their jobs without pay, cooks made food without expecting a wage, everyone pooled their resources and looked after one another.

We also see examples of this when other governments have fallen -- and all governments eventually do! When a nation-state ends, life doesn't end. People keep going to work to make the medicine and put on the leg casts and wash physically disabled people's bodies and make the food. People WANT to feel useful, helpful, included, and looked after, and they will do these things without being forced to by an authoritarian power structure. We see this in the campus encampments and the incredible outpouring of generosity they are experiencing too.

It is quite common for a person to mistakenly believe that the government is all that is keeping our social order working, and that we are all just one moment away from violent chaos and deprivation without it. But that really isn't true. Even without the government, we will still have the *people* who understand how food production and logistics work, the *people* who research and test the drugs, the *people* who watch the children and nurse the elders and fix the roads and butcher chickens.

Without the alienating, exploitative economic structure we currently have, it would actually be EASIER and more efficient for us to take care of one another with these skills, because our time wouldnt be wasted on bullshit jobs that don't contribute to society.

There are lots of great readings about all of this on the Anarchist Library, but I recommend starting with David Graeber's books! Bullshit Jobs, then Debt the first 5000 Years, then Utopia of Rules, then Dawn of Everything. Bullshit Jobs is the easiest read.

[k1ngpin42]

Abby being insecure about how needy she is ;)

Warnings: Not proof read at all 😭 I wrote this while sick at like 3am so sorry for this monstrosity. Pretty intense sexual references, some fluff if you can call it that. 

“We shouldn’t be doing this…” Abby breathes out apologetically, bringing one of her large hands to the soft flesh on your face. You cock your head, smiling at her softly. Your wide eyes bring a smile of her own to Abby’s face as she makes the comparison to a deer in headlights in her mind. 

“I just…” Abby explains, letting out a deep breath. “Don’t want you to feel like I’m taking advantage of you. I mean I- feel like I’m taking advantage of you.” You were stunned by her words. In fact, you were stunned by the whole situation. Abby; without her cocky fucking facade about her, the fact Abby would think she’s taking advantage of you. 

You had wanted this from the start, so if in any plane of reality she was somehow taking advantage of you, you’d let her, 100 times over.

“What are you talking about? You know I love our sex…”

“I’m objectifying you.” Abby tries, and you let out a laugh in disbelief. 

“What are you talking about?”

“I’ve tried not to think about it, but I can’t. It makes me feel so selfish I can barely say it.”

“Say what, Abby? I’m so confused-“

“I want to have sex with you. Every minute of every day. I think about you when you’re on assignments, I dream about you when you’re sleeping elsewhere, I want to fuck you senseless in front of everyone I- Jesus what am I saying? What am I doing, even? But it’s true I just…whether you’re wearing tight jeans, short skirts, long dresses, even a fucking hoodie I want to tear it off and do so many things to you. Maybe…maybe we should break up, this shouldn’t be normal, it isn’t-“ You stop her by planting a soft kiss on her lips. 

Abbys gaze softened and her shoulders slouch back into place.

“Just calm down Abby….I love our sex. Fucking love it.”

“But-“ You shake your head, quickly preventing  her doubts from festering.

“Love…we’re in a relationship….if you didn’t feel passionate for me there wouldn’t be much of one, would there? Now just look at the place around us. This place was once used for actual football…by people who lived in a world with an abundance of simple pleasures. We live in a world where pleasure is so much rarer, it’s no surprise that you revel in what we have…what you can give me….especially since you’re a soldier. Always so…tense.” She listens to your explanation intently and nods, hesitantly. 

“I still feel…you know….” You look at her with a comforting smile, but it was still clear to her you weren’t a mind reader.

“I know that I love being around you…hugging you…kissing you…I could probably survive without the sex but I still feel like I’m using you somehow…I mean we’ve…” she clears her throat, now wondering why the word ‘sex' suddenly felt like poison in her throat.

“Had sex at least twice a day every day that we’ve been together. I mean that one Saturday I-“ She pauses and you both blush remembering it.

“You were still limping by Monday….” She concludes. You can’t help but laugh at her babbling. 

“Abigail Anderson…this is emotional stuff, you know you should write this down…ooh maybe you can try poetry?” She shuts the idea down with a playful hit to your shoulder. 

“Ow.” You laugh. Your smile fades a little and you close the gap between you guys, leaning into her ear. 

“You think you’re the only one who craves it every day? I know you don’t want to hurt me but when you’re rough holy fuck….the marks you leave on my body…it’s stupid and embarrassing but I get off to them….” Her eyes widen.

“What? You never said-“

“Well because I thought it was toxic at the time-“

“Hey you said this stuff was normal!”

“It is!” You exclaim back, playfully. You both laugh and you kiss her deeply. She leans back onto her bed and you fall onto her lap, kissing her fully again.

“Hm, so what other shit do you want to tell me, then?” She asked, playing with your hair. You just smirk at her.

“To be honest…I think I’ve had enough talking for one afternoon wouldn’t you agree my little sex addict?” She rolls her eyes.

“You’re so annoying.” Abby replies, unbuckling her belt. 

#abby anderson #tlou2 #ellie williams #abby tlou #abby x fem reader #sub abby

[justmeinadaze]

Hi! I’m 23 but requesting anonymously because this is a similar situation I experienced and wished someone would have been there for me.

I was wondering if you would be interested in writing a Steddie x reader story where the reader recently lost her grandma who she lived with in a two bedroom apartment. It’s left the reader financially strapped and she posts an ad for a roommate. Steve and Eddie are looking for a place and sees the ad. Steve is a nurse and Eddie is a mechanic or masseuse (two extremes but I feel like Eddie is always a mechanic lol).

The reader is really withdrawn and struggling with grief because her grandma was all she had. She is working two jobs and not taking care of herself. She wears herself out and gets sick. She’s really resistant to letting anyone take care of her. And she doesn’t talk to Steve and Eddie much because she’s trying to hide her struggles and doesn’t want to bother them. And it’s an adjustment to living with other people. Steve and Eddie have a huge soft spot for the reader and want to take care of her.

There can be smut or no smut in this or if it would happen to turn into two or more parts! You’re a talented writer so I have no doubt you will write this beautifully!

A/N: It took me awhile to get to this because it struck a cord with me. I get this. I am this minus a Steve and Eddie.

I think I've mentioned it before but my father suddenly passed away 10 years ago and it destroyed me. I still deal with the aftermath of that to this day. Not only do I struggle with that grief but I struggle with how I was and have been treated which is why I am a big advocate on taking the time to feel what you feel and no matter what anyone says THERE IS NO TIME LIMIT ON GRIEF.

The doctor experience I write in this story happened to me and the chaos of that...I can't even... But yeah...more than anything I want anyone who's grieving a loved one to know, you are not alone, you are not broken, your feelings are valid, and I love you <3.

The title of this comes from "Guernica" by Brand New. I was thinking of this song when I got the request because the lead singer wrote it for his grandfather who was sick in the hospital.

P.S. I am more than willing to write another part to this. I wanted to focus on the emotional aspect more than a smutty aspect for this first part.

Warnings: Topic of Grief and loss of a family member, panic attack mentioned in slight detail, Steve and Eddie have an established relationship here.

"I submit no excuse

If this is what I have to do

I owe you every day I wake

If I could I would shrink myself

Sink through your skin to your blood cells

Remove whatever makes you hurt

But I am too weak to be your cure

Is this the way a toy feels when its batteries run dry?

I am the watch you always wear but you forget to wind."

“So, um, yeah the rent is $1300 including utilities and it’s due on the first of the month. You can leave it on the counter here and I can take it down to make the payment.”

Watching them go through her room was like being stabbed in the chest. When your grandmother passed, a part of you died with her and it killed you even more when you had to slowly begin removing things from her room to make space for a new roommate. Your grandma was your everything basically being a mother to you when everyone else disappeared. When she got sick it, it was no brainer to have her move in so you could look out for her with as much love and care as she had you growing up. 

For four years, she fought her disease until heaven decided it was time for her to go home. After that you began to spiral and not just personally but within life. When did everything become so expensive? Even in your rent-controlled apartment, you could barely afford the bills because everything else around you escalated to the point where now you couldn’t even take out a small loan to get groceries because your credit was so fucked up. 

You didn’t want to get a roommate and avoided the notion as long as possible but when it was becoming harder and harder to live day to day, you finally gave in. 

You were surprised when a boy answered your ad you had placed in the paper but when he told you their story, you couldn’t help but sympathize. 

“Yeah, my boyfriend and I are looking for a nice, safe place. The small town we were living in was already harassing him for the way he looks but when they found out we were together… I knew I needed to get us both out of there.”

“We can take it if you want. I don’t want you to feel like you have to take care of everything.”, the pretty boy who introduced himself as Steve responded as he leaned against the wall next to you.

“I mean it’s no problem. I work a couple of jobs so I usually leave pretty early anyway.”

“Me to. Well, it’s more like me coming in early because I work overnights from time to time. I’m not sure if the hospital over here is the same but… yeah. What, um, what do you think, babe?”

The longhaired boy who told you his name was Eddie beamed widely your way.

“I love it. Are you sure we won’t be bothering you, sweetheart? We’re nice guys, we swear.”

“No. No bother.”

Both men glance towards each other at your sullen tone before Steve extended his hand towards you with an equal large but soft smile of his own. 

“We’ll take it.”

***

You didn’t anticipate how hard it was going to be having someone in the apartment again let alone people that reminded you of her. Before she retired, your grandmother was a nurse and when the scent of hand sanitizer and hospital lingered on Steve’s admittedly beautiful hands, your mind shifted to the stories she would tell you about her late nights talking with patients in her care. 

Through smell alone, you learned Eddie got a job as a mechanic at the shop down the street and the first night when the aroma of gasoline lingered you cried at the memories of being a little girl with your grandparents, sitting by your grandfather’s truck as he attempted to fix it for the 400th time. 

Loneliness began to set in almost immediately after they moved in. They never actively displayed affection in front of you but there were moments when you were leaving for work and you’d pass by their open bedroom door to see them cuddled together. Sometimes at night when you would come home from your second job, you would hear Eddie talking to Steve over the phone while he was at work and he would giggle at something the man said on the other line before telling him how much he loved him. 

You missed having someone care about you…

Your grandparents had always been there for you through everything; every breakup, rough patch in life, or just to have someone remind you that you were loved unconditionally…they were there. 

When your grandmother lived with you, you laughed harder, smiled wider, and loved waking up in the morning. Now that all seemed so far away, so unattainable. You couldn’t ever picture yourself being happy like that again. 

To avoid that pain, you ran around constantly. It’s not like you could stop anyway with how hard things got around you. Life moves on…you can’t stop just because you’re numb. You suffer through it just like everyone else. 

“Y/N?”

At the sound of Eddie’s voice, you jumped shattering the glass in your hand.

“Fuck, I’m sorry—”

“No, no. That was my fault. You seemed lost in thought. Don’t move, I can clean this up here.”

Nodding, you stood still as you watched him run to grab a broom before your brain caught up with you.

“Wait! Wait, um, don’t…don’t throw away the glass. This was, um, someone in my family gave me this cup.”

“Oh, uh, ok. Well, I don’t see a lot of little pieces. I can try and fix it for you. Do you feel comfortable coming into our room?”

Silently, you headed in that direction, pausing in front of the bed as the metalhead shimmed around you to dig in the desk drawer by the window. Everything in the room was completely different. Where her bed with her yellow comforter used to be was now a bigger bed, higher off the ground with black sheets and blue pillowcases. Where her dresser used to be with the vanity that had photos taped to the mirror was now a much smaller 3 drawer shelf with a guitar hanging above it. On the nightstand, instead of medication and a photo of you with your grandparents, there was now a pack of cigarettes, empty beer cans, a photo of both men, and a book that was half read. 

“Ok, I knew Steve had it around here somewhere. I’m clumsy as hell so he’s always fixing things I accidently break.”, Eddie mused as he sat on the floor and began to focus on his task. “So, um, how are you?”

You couldn’t help but breathily laugh at the awkward way he asked that making him smirk at the sound as you took a seat in front of him.

“I’m alright. I just have a lot going on, you know?”

“Yeah, you come and go a lot like Steve but he gets to sleep. What do you do if I may ask?”

“I’m actually a photographer for the paper.”

“Oooo paparazzi girl!” Eddie’s grin grows as his eyes take you in watching you genuinely laugh for the first time since they met you. “Is that why you come and go at weird hours?”

“Oh, no. When I’m not there, I have another job at the mall taking photos of like families and kids at Glamour Shots.”

“Yeah? Those shiny, glimmering photos? I keep trying to get Steve to take a couple of those with me but he gets adorably embarrassed.”

“How long have you two been together?”

“Geez, uh, almost 3 years now. Spent the first couple hiding our relationship because of our town and his parents, rich fuckers who think they control the moral high ground.”, he rolls his eyes. “A few months ago, he finally told them we were together and his parents kicked him out of his house. A couple weeks later, I got harassed at my job and that was the final straw. Steve packed our things and we drove out here.”

“I’m so sorry.”

“No reason for you to be, princess. You’ve been nothing but nice to us. Well, when we see you.”, he chuckles. “Steve gets worried sometimes that you push yourself too hard.”

“You don’t need to worry about me. I’m strong. I’ll be ok.”

“No one’s saying your weak, Y/N.”

“Good because I’m not!” You snap as silence falls over the room before Eddie displays the cup for you with his palm on the bottom. 

“You may not want to use it for its purpose but keep it as a display.”

Without taking it from him, you rise to your feet and run to your room, slamming the door. 

###########

Everything was loud.

Why is everything so loud?

You were running late for your second job and you couldn’t find the polo you wore for it. You felt disgusting, not having time to shower in what felt like an eternity and you were just so fucking exhausted. You couldn’t afford to lose this job nor calling in to rest. You had to make money. It’s what everyone else does.

Why is everything so loud?

As you opened your door, you were met with Eddie standing at the counter in the kitchen. 

“Have, um, have you seen…”

“Y/N, are you alright?” Tears cloud your vision as you run your fingers through your hair and absently look around the apartment with your eyes. “BABE.”

You flinched at the metalhead’s loud but stern tone not even realizing that Steve was suddenly in front of you with his hands on your biceps. 

“Y/N, what’s going on?”

“Let me go! I have…I have to…to go to work…”, you sobbed before your legs gave out and the world went black. 

***

When your eyes finally fluttered open, it was pitch dark outside and your body felt incredibly drained. It felt like every bone in your body had become stiff as you carefully tried to sit up. 

“Hey, no, no, no. Don’t move to quickly or we’ll lose you again.”, Steve cooed softly as he came up from behind you and sat down on his knees to help adjust you. “Good. Here, drink some of this but not too fast.”

When he handed you the bottle of water, you gladly sipped it as his concerned eyes scanned you over. 

“How are you feeling?”

“Heavy.”

“I’m not surprised. When you push your body as hard as you have at some point it pushes back. Do you think you can eat something while we talk?”

When you nodded, a plate appeared beside you as Eddie handed it to his partner.

“I’m going to ask you some questions purely from a medical standpoint, ok? Do you feel comfortable if Ed stays? He had a bit of a panic attack to when we couldn’t wake you up.”

“That’s fine.”, you whisper. “Is that what happened? I panicked?”

“Um, kind of, honey. This kind of seems like a slow build so I would say anxiety attack. We know you work pretty much around the clock and you told me when I called that you were struggling with cash. Has anything else been going on?”

“Someone…that mattered to me…is gone. Died.”

Eddie sat on the couch next you and without thinking brushed some of your hair behind your ear so they could see your face better. 

“I’m sorry. How long ago?”, the nurse continued to inquire. 

“On the 18th it will be 8 months.”

“And you’ve been doing everything you have?! Y/N.”, the metalhead sighed as his boyfriend gave him a look of warning as if to say tread carefully. “Sweetheart, you should be taking it easy so you can grieve.”

“I can’t.”

“Why?”

“Because I’m supposed to be fine by now.”, you murmur as you shrug your shoulders. “After my grandmother died, I got 2 weeks paid leave for bereavement. Two weeks. Two weeks of fucking casseroles, sympathies, and people checking in. After that time, everyone began to slowly disappear and I went back to work but I never…I never felt whole. I didn’t understand why everyone else seemed fine while I was still felt like I was dying.”

“After two months, I went to a doctor and told them how I felt. Do you know what she said? ‘After 6 weeks, it’s no longer grief but depression.’ That shook me. I thought to myself ‘well shit. I guess there is a time limit on grieving and there must be something wrong with me because I can’t get better!’” 

The tears begin to fall at a faster pace and you let them go. 

“I still have to work, pay my bills, live my life… but no one ever walked me through how to do that. No one ever showed me how to continue existing without the person you love…without someone who meant the most to you… I wasn’t prepared to be left alone without her.”

Eddie presses your head to his chest as you sob, his arms squeezing you tightly as he whispered that you were ok. Sudden heat warmed your side as Steve leaned his head against your shoulder as he intertwined his fingers with yours while your body trembled against them. 

This had been a long time coming and you allowed the pain to wash over you till you fell asleep in their arms. 

***

This time when you opened your eyes, you were bundled up in a blanket with your head still against Eddie’s chest with one hand comfortingly rubbing your arm while the other held a book he was reading. 

“What are you reading?”

Tilting his head, his gentle eyes take you in as he grins and closes the book to show you the cover. 

The Vampire Lestat.

“I love vampires but Steve likes werewolves. Should have known he’d break my heart one day.”, he teased as the other boy comes around and places a soda with more food on the coffee table in front of you. 

“They are big dog like animals. How can you not like them? Y/N, I want you to at least eat a little bit of this, ok? You need to refuel.”

Not wanting to leave the metalheads comfortable embrace, you whine as you sit up until the smell of the pasta hits your nostrils and you realize how hungry you actually are. 

“Slow! Goodness.”, Steve chuckles as he takes a seat on floor after serving his partner and himself as well. 

“It’s been so long since I’ve had a home cooked meal. Usually, I’m eating microwaved food or something I pick up on the way to and from work. This is delicious, Steve, thank you.”

The three of you casually talk allowing you to really get to the know the men you had been living with. Eddie loved music and had been playing guitar since he was a little boy. He and his uncle had been fixing up cars since he moved in with him after his father went to jail. Steve learned in high school he enjoyed helping people and after he graduated he went to nursing school. 

“My dad gave me shit because I’m ‘settling’ and not becoming a doctor. I like what I do though. As a nurse I get more one on one with patients and make them feel cared for which as you noticed is hard in today’s society. Doctors seem to care more about the money and not the person.”

His eyes drink in your demeanor as you smile, agreeing with his words. Your entire energy seemed different since the first time they met you. You seemed to be relaxing a bit more and some of what he assumed was your normal personality began to shine through. 

“What about you, honey? Eddie told me you’re a photographer.”

Silently, you unraveled the blanket you had been tangled in and bounced to your bedroom, returning with some photos that you placed on the coffee table in front of them. 

“This man here proposed to this girlfriend by painting a mural on the side of an abandoned building that the city was going to tear down. The mayor called it graffiti and they tried arresting him for it.”

“Oh, wow. That’s gorgeous. I hope this guy is making a ton of money in like New York or something.”, the longhaired boy grins.

“This young lady saved her baby brother from a fire.”

“This are amazing, Y/N. You are extremely talented. “

 “What was this story about?”, Steve asked as he held up a photo of an older woman smiling on the couch by a window watching the rain. 

“That’s my grandma.”, you softly smile as you take it from his hands. “This was about a year before she… I remember we were talking about some trivial stuff and suddenly she turned to me and said ‘Life is beautiful. Even something as small as listening to the rain is never something you should take for granted.’”

“I like that.”, Eddie responded with a tender tone that made you feel safe. “She was right. I know it’s hard with all the bullshit going on in the world but… I think we do need to stop and take a look around, you know?”

“Y/N, honey, we hope you know that you don’t have to do everything yourself. We can help you. We have some money in savings if you need to take a break and—”

“No. No, I can’t ask you to do that.”

“You’re not asking, we’re offering.”, Steve insisted. “At least, quit your second job. You need a moment to breathe. We can help with any extra bills you may have until you really get back on your feet.”

Tilting forward, you kissed his cheek before leaning towards Eddie to do the same. 

“Thank you…so much…”

################

Over the next week, you felt more motivated to do things you hadn’t wanted to do over the past 8 months. You did what Steve suggested and quit your job at the mall. You began moving around and leaving the apartment for fun things instead of work. You accompanied the boys to a movie at the theater and took them to the lake where you basked in the sunlight all day. 

You took the time to eat healthier, home cooked meals even offering to make your roommates a meal every now and again. Sometimes when you knew Steve would be out all night, you left some leftovers in the refrigerator and wake up the next morning with a note on the counter thanking you with a big smiley face.

One morning, however, you were surprised with something different. When you opened your bedroom door to get some coffee, you noticed a box with a big red bow on the top and a piece of paper attached to the side. 

“Y/N,

There’s no bottom to the box so all you need to do is lift. I was afraid if we put this in an actual box it may break. Steve said it would be ok but I reminded him he fixes people not objects : ). 

Eddie’s been working on this for a while but we thought after how well you’ve been doing, we just wanted to show you how proud we are of you and how much we’ve enjoyed having you in our lives.

Eddie & Steve”

Carefully lifting the wrapped box and placing it aside, you picked up the glass you had dropped and Eddie had tried to fix. The blank material now had an image of your grandmother you had showed them illustrated on to it with her head turned towards the window. Instead of watching the rain, when she looked out the window there was a detailed drawing of you grinning with your fingers tangled in your hair as you were moving it behind your ear.

He had painted it with light colors, giving her an angelic glow that broke you as you began to cry.

Your feet scooted against the floor as you hurried towards their door and knocked on it a bit too enthusiastically causing it to fly open with a panicked look on the metalhead’s half asleep face. 

“What!? What’s going on? Where’s the fire?!”

You tackled your arms around his neck, not even realizing he was only in boxers. From the bed, Steve saw what was in your hand, smirking as he fell back against the pillow and slung his arm over his eyes.

“Thank you for this. You have no idea how much this means to me.”, you whispered. 

When he finally realized nothing was wrong, his arms settled around your waist.

“I know what it’s like to lose someone you love. You’re not alone, Y/N. You don’t have to carry it all by yourself, ok?” As you pull away and let him go, his hands cup your face as he dries your tears. “Now go back to bed, you fucking weirdo. It’s too early.”, he teases as he lightly pushes you away making you giggle as he turns back around and crawls into bed.

“May I—”

Before you can finish your sentence, he lifts up the covers and Steve pats the mattress between them. Once you climb in, the pretty boy lifts his arm and circles it around you to tug you closer to his side. When your head rests on his bare chest, your surprised at how warm and comfortable he feels against you, looping your arm around him as you nuzzle into his skin. Another set of arms wrap around your waist pressing you against Eddie’s equally comforting frame. 

His steady breath hitting your shoulder mixed with the other man’s heartbeat lulls you into the heaviest sleep you hadn’t experienced in a long time. 

#############

Steddie Asks

#steddie #eddie munson #stranger things #steve harrington #joseph quinn #fan fiction #eddie munson fluff #joe keery #steve harrington fluff #steddie x y/n #eddie fanfic #steddie ask #eddie munson angst #steddie fluff #steddie smut #steddie fanfiction #steddie fic #steve and eddie #steddie au #fan fic writing #tw grief #dealing with grief

[giantchasm]

Hey Peony! Are you a zombie!? O:

It's a favorite nickname of some kids I don't always get along with, unfortunately... these stupid jerks who are still caught up on stuff that happened a really long time ago. They don't like my family— Dad and Miss Sectonia especially, so they don't like me either. It's dumb 'cause all the things they're angry about are things that happened before we were even born. But their parents have told them all about it, and now they're mad even though it never affected any of them. I... hear a lot about how my dad really hurt people or is responsible for all of the current issues in Floralia. Truthfully, I wouldn't mind if they just took it out on me, but that's not what it's like. They're always going on about how bad my family is, and I hate hearing it. They call them awful people, and it's not accurate at all! Dad and Miss Sectonia didn't mean to harm anyone. Dad just loved too much, and Miss Sectonia was sick. I don't meet people who dislike my mom as often 'cause of where I live, but it's the same for her. She's not evil! She was just desperate! Granddad, too! ...It's okay, though. I try not to let their words get to me. I know they're just imbeciles. So it's not like I'll let them affect how I see myself or the people I love. Would still be grateful if you didn't call me that, though.

[Soft gasp] What's this? Not everyone thinks Peony is the specialest girl in the world!?

Yeeeeahhh. Unfortunately it just kind of comes with the territory of being the daughter of two war criminals. Taranza in particular kind of helped Sectonia ravage Floralia, which is where Peony lives. The kids around her have heard a lot of stories about their parents being traumatized or haven't been able to meet certain family members of theirs because said family members were killed during the tyranny. Lots of anger and sadness regarding that.

Not that that excuses them taking it out on Peony. Being mad at Taranza, sure, but Peony didn't do anything. Like she said: she wasn't even born at the time! But Taranza's not someone these kids feel they can lash out at (...in fact, they're kind of scared of him), so they aim at the next best thing: his innocent daughter, and that's where it crosses over into just being cruel.

...Yeesh. Just get some therapy, you brats! Leave her alone! D:<

It's okay, though. Like Peony said, she's coping. Truthfully, half of the time she just has her guardian angel taze these people to scare them off. Doesn't make it any less of a pain, though.

@kirbyoctournament

#peony haltmann #kirby oc tournament #if it helps lighten the mood any i would like to share two facts: #one: one of the kids who picks on her is in fact also a fankid...... of my two ocs who HATE taranza #i thought it would be funny if they seemingly fell in love and procreated based on that alone #two: 'loved too much' here is a reference to one of the most controversial/stupid things the authors of warrior cats have ever said #NOT one peony made intentionally mind you #nor am i seriously comparing taranza to That Dickhead #but the concept made me laugh so i had her say it anyways #i think people should start excusing all sorts of crimes with 'he loved too much' #also i'm trying to get one ask answered every weekday #we'll see if that's a pace i can actually maintain. but

[the-musical-cc]

Not gonna watch the Mario Movie until at least next week (It's Semana Santa over here, kids are outta school, people don't give a damn about still respecting COVID restrictions and people are incredibly annoying about being the first to watch something as if it's not worth a damn otherwise.) so here's papá luchón Toadsworth with his fruit spawn from my Momotaro!Peach AU in the meantime.

#Princess Peach #Super Mario Bross #Toadsworth #Momotaro!Peach AU #headcanoning #cc draws #i have one or two chapters already written on this topic but keep postponing actually posting aoijsoaisjaios #maybe today's the day #I pretty much have made a promise with myself to make and post stuff that's not Frankelda-related at least once a week #because I feel like everyone's sick of me by now #isn't anxiety a barrel of monkey's worth of fun

[frogoru]

i've had to indulge in christian scripture a lot for the past few months because personal life stuff and i need everyone to know that there's a book in the bible where king solomon goes on and on about how horny he is for his wife and it's SO SENSUAL and i didn't expect it at all (it's really beautifully written if anything but also sex funny. i put verses down below that invoked said feelings because its so wow)

"Your two breasts are like two fawns,     twins of a gazelle,     that graze among the lilies."

- 4:5

"...How much better is your love than wine,     and the fragrance of your oils than any spice! Your lips drip nectar, my bride;     honey and milk are under your tongue;"

- 4:10-11

"How beautiful are your feet in sandals,     O noble daughter! Your rounded thighs are like jewels,     the work of a master hand. Your navel is a rounded bowl     that never lacks mixed wine. Your belly is a heap of wheat,     encircled with lilies.  Your two breasts are like two fawns,     twins of a gazelle.  Your neck is like an ivory tower. Your eyes are pools in Heshbon,     by the gate of Bath-rabbim. Your nose is like a tower of Lebanon,     which looks toward Damascus. Your head crowns you like Carmel,     and your flowing locks are like purple;     a king is held captive in the tresses."

- 7:1-5

"Your stature is like a palm tree,     and your breasts are like its clusters.  I say I will climb the palm tree     and lay hold of its fruit. Oh may your breasts be like clusters of the vine,     and the scent of your breath like apples, and your mouth like the best wine.

She

It goes down smoothly for my beloved,     gliding over lips and teeth.

 I am my beloved's,     and his desire is for me."

- 7:7-10

In verse 8 of chapter 5 his wife says "I am sick with love." and that makes me feel really AHHHHHH oh my god?? it's so intimate

#cw christianity #need someone to love me like king solomon loves his wife #“I am sick with love.” what if i died right now #i love song of solomon #christianity is so loving and awesome when you're not stressing about being a sinner #i can't believe having such beautiful feelings like this for the same sex is supposed to be evil in most interpretations of biblical canon #my relationship with the religion is so conflicting because i'm surrounded by it a lot and want to embrace it fully like everyone else but #embracing it in the way they want me to would mean casting away a lot of things and indulgences that i love #marching to the own beat of my drum

[aropride]

if you imagine that guy from saw and he's sawing his own leg off in the bathroom but it's just like, a normal bathroom and he's not chained to the wall or anything and he really didn't have to saw off his leg at all but he imagined a situation in which he would have to do that so he decided to get it over with as soon as possible. well that's how i approach all my interpersonal relationships

#text #i decided in my brain that my best friend hates me (she made a comment that hurt my feelings today and then a different comment #several weeks ago so basically shes sick of me and she hates me and wants me to die etc) #so now i am trying to dig my brain out of panic-mode trying to restructure my future around her inevitably getting tired of me #(& also trying not to upset or inconvenience her or anyone in any way in case this is the last straw and they Realize I'm A Bad Person) #and then also all my other friends will leave as well cuz they'll be like Wow if she didnt want to be around him anymore shes probably got #a good reason... and then everyone leaves me and i die. and yes i do this every time one of my friends accidentally hurts my feelings #you know when u accidentally step on ur pet's tail and u imagine a world where they hate u forever. yeah #it's like that except for someone steps on MY tail and i decide they hate me forever because my tail was in the way of their foot #does this make sense. Feel free to diagnose me in the comments #neg

[moonlit-orchid]

When your friend needs you to be there to comfort them, but you have no energy for serious conversations and so you're stuck wondering if youre being a selfish asshole or if youre justified in not wanting to be the one to sort their problems out

#vent #its not like they didnt offer to hear my problems. but i just dont want to talk about. or anything #i dont want serious conversations. i dont want to have to worry about other people. i just cant. #im just so fucking exhausted and i dont know if its talking to them and feeling drained by the fact that theyre going through something- #-and that i need to be the therapist or if im just sick. again. #plus yesterday i slept late. my mum made me cry (i think she was just tired out by that point in the day so i doubt it was personal) #and just #im fucking tired ok #and I'm sorry im a bad friend #i just dont have energy. i want to have good energy around me to try give me some. #but when theyre upset it gets into me and drains me and I've been there as much as i can but i just cant right now. im too tired #i know im a shitty person but literally everyone got to be a shitty person at my expense so isnt it my fucking turn? #and then assuming i was acting like that to hurt them. I DO NOT WANT TO HURT ANYONE. IF WE HAVE A FIGHT I WANT TO MOVE ON. #I'm not gonna be caught up in it if we resolved it #but yeah. long story short they're going through shit and i feel like shit #and i think them going through shit is what makes me feel like shit. because i worry about them #and they can lash out on me #i just dont know anymore. i dont know if im an awful person or not #last year i broke up with a friend and my mum said I'll do the same with the next friend #it wasnt my fault #that friend ghosted me #im trying not to be her rn too and im scared that ive been in the wrong im scared im a shitty person too #but at the same time im too done to even really care #i just wanna stop fucking feeling all this and just get on with my day

[orcelito]

Opening the local bubble tea store absolutely livid and shaking in rage and upset bc my bitch ass boss is too concerned about us sitting on the job to order the tea bags I requested Two Fucking Weeks Ago (it only takes like 4 or 5 days to ship) and so we're out and I had to hand wash the 1 reusable bag to make black tea and I have to strain the free floating tea leaves from the cold brew and I just KNOWWWW he's going to have something more to bitch about because he always does

Last straw on the camel's back, etc etc, I want to put in my two weeks notice by the end of this week. That's a goal for myself.

#speculation nation #i currently dont have a job lined up but im going to start applying Today #because i cant take this anymore. i cant fucking take this anymore. #i feel like im about to shatter from the strain of hos chokehold #8 years total under his thumb and for What? he doesnt appreciate me. he doesnt value me. #he's an asshole this place sucks and it makes me so sad because i really do care about the people here #but i cant. i cant fucking do it anymore. #im really glad im alone on shift rn bc ha ha ha. ill put up the mask for customers but i am #genuinely shaking rn. im so upset. #this being after he complained Again about people sitting on the job during the meeting last night like #shut UPPPP I DONT CAAAARE #YOU TRY WORKING WITH CHRONIC PAIN AND FATIGUE AND A JOB THAT DOESNT GIVE GENUINE BREAKS #'oh if you need to take a break then do it but just dont sit down on the job“ #WHEN DO YOU THINK I COULD TAKE MY BREAK? IM WORKING ALONE!!!!!!!!!!!!!+ #and when im.not working alone im working with trainees so i still cant leave the store unattended #im sick of him.im so sick of him and im THIIIIIIIIIS close to just breaking down here and now #i hate him i hate him i hate him i hate him i HATE HIM #negative/ #sorry for the vent i just feel like.im about to blow up and everyone's busy so ic cant. vent properly #im not even done opening bc im too busy freaking out and pacing and being angry #and hes gonna watch me sitting here thru the cameras and be like Ho Hum Look at you immediately doing what i said not to #like fucking STOP!!!! WATCHING US!!!!!!! YOU FUCKING CREEP!!!!!!!!!!!!!! #IM SO SICK OF HIM WATCHING US THROUGH THE CAMERAS. HE HAS NO TRUST IN ME DOING MY JOB #0 value for me as a person or employee 0 value for my to this day dedication to this company #i want to send my heel through those front windows. watch them shatter. wreck the whole place #because fuck this place and fuck him #i wontttt bc i dont wanna go to jail lol but the temptation is there. i fucking hate his guts. #im going to put in my 2 weeks by the end of this week. im going to start applying to places Today. just fucking watch me.

[martyrbat]

so many of you talk about the cruel adults in your childhood that negatively effected you and caused lifelong insecurity yet you're still perfectly fine with being that mean stranger to any kid that has the misfortune of existing around you and thats just really gross !!!

#like i get kids can be overwhelming for a various amount of reasons but its not going to kill you to treat children with basic human decency #adults can be just as overwhelming or annoying—if not more. yet if you talked to an another adult the same way you do to a kid #then ppl would fucking hate you and not want to be around you because youre not being cool and witty—youre just mean!!! #everyone has experienced the frustration of being a kid being mistreated by an adult. some more than others #rather its ignoring your bodily autonomy (from sa and assault to hugging you when you don't want to be touched to not letting you #make your own harmless choices like a haircut or whatever). everyone has been talked down to or had their opinion treated like its nothing #or that their thoughts or input doesn't matter. everyone has a childhood experience with a mean or judgemental adult #yet over and over ppl are fine just repeating that cycle of abuse and hatred #like youre a young adult and youre still getting treated like shit by older ones. but youre able to have a drink or you graduated or smthn #so now you feel like you earned that right to be judgemental & angry & mean to a group of people that didnt fucking do anything to you #anyways. this is because im sick and had to go to the store to get groceries and meds #so its a 20 minute walk to the nearest store in 108 degrees bc i dont have gas money and then in the store im ofc using a face mask #like im sweaty and feel disgusting and like shit but this kid was SO fucking excited about his spiderman toy and wanted to talk and #his mom said ‘i told you no one wants to hear about that crap leave her alone’ and like?? no fuck off let a kid be happy?? hes not fucking #doing anything wrong?? so we talked and he showed me the little tiy that lights up and asked if i saw the new spiderverse movie #and i told him i havent! so he asked why so i explained i have photosensitivity and what that means and why i cant see it #(‘even though i heard its super cool!’) and HE WAS SO SWEET... like immediately hid the toy because oh! flashing lights can hurt me! #and then immediately said dont worry because he'll tell me about it so its like i saw it instead! #and like. guys imma be honest with you. i stilm got no fucking idea what this movie's plot is. #but you bet your fucking ass i was pretending like i was following along & was going ‘no way!’ ‘so it's a parallel universe...?’ ‘oh wow!’ #like yea its unnecessary. i felt oike i was gonna collapse and im still struggling to breathe at home now. but also i been the kid #who just wanted to talk about my interests and no one wanted to or was dismissing it. #i know it's not a end of the world deal but i also know that crushing feeling. you gotta be the kindness you want to see in the world yknow #anyways. be nice to kids or im not going to be nice to you. they're one of the most vulnerable members of our society and deserves kindness

[nbmudkip]

im CRAAAAZZZYYYY im FUCKING INSANE!!!!!! i’m a cycle path….. HHHHHHHFDRRRRRRRHHHHHGHHHH

#me.txt #IM SO FUCKED RN #IM IN THAT HORRIBLE STAGE OF A NEW HYPERFIXATION FORMING WHERE ITS ALL I CAN THINK AND ALL I CAN TALK ABOUT AND ALL I CAN SEE #which happens to be the VERY ANNOYING STAGE in which i am VERY ANNOYING towards EVERYONE AROUND ME because i wont SHUT UP!!!!!! #talking about anything that isnt isat for more than 30 seconds without bringing it up somehow is like PULLING TEETH to me right now #and my friends are already starting to get sick of and weirded out by it #and i dont want to keep randomly bringing it yp and being annoying but I CANT NOT DO THAT!!! #IT FEELS LIKE MY SYOMACH IS FULL OF BEES WHEN I TRY!!!! MORESO THAN USUAL!!!!!!!! #and its not like i can go on a reblog spree or talk to anyone else about it #BECAUSE IM NOT EVEN HALFWAY THROUGH THE GAME!!!! #AND IM ALREADY THIS SICK IN THE HEAD!!!!! BUT I CANNOT LET MYSELF GET SPOILED!!!!!!!! #CANT keep talking about it to friends CANT go online for an outlet IM GOING TO DIE #I HAVE NO WAY TO SCRATCH THE ITCH IN MY BRAIN AT ALL AND IT KEEPS BUILDING!!!!!!!!!! #AAAAAAAAGGGGGGGHRRRRAAAAAAGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH #okay. im fine now. im normal. i can survive without bringing it up. i can do it. im brave #<- guy who is not normal and will not survive and is kinning siffrin so hard they feel sick

[purplethespian]

Waiting for Permission to Be Sick - Input Requested!

So, I got officially diagnosed with two chronic conditions last week. And the doctor explained to me the details of how these conditions affect my body, and what kinds of symptoms to look out for, and what I can expect life to look like going forward. And I got prescribed meds, and given detailed instructions for when to take them and any side effects I might experience and what to do to help myself feel better if I'm not feeling well, and all of that.

And I just. Haven't done it. I've started taking some of the meds, but not all of them, and like. There's no real reason for me not to? I'm just. Not doing it. Like I've looked up some products on Etsy to have like. Emergency medical info with me so that if I randomly black out or faint again in public, someone could see me and have info know what to do. And I've been looking at pins that say "I have an invisible disability" and aaaaaaaall sorts of stuff. Basically just window shopping for my chronic illness starter kit. But it's been over a week now and I haven't bought anything, and I seem to have convinced myself that I can't start taking my meds until I have all of my Items sorted out and prepared. And like -- there are some actual reasons for this, such as my schedule has been all over the place and my meds need to be taken at multiple times a day at certain intervals, and some with food and some without food, so I need to be able to have that stuff ready to go even when I'm out and about.

But I'm not. Actually doing the work to get everything sorted out and ready? I'm just window shopping. And today, I have been very tired all day because of the rain and because I did too much yesterday, and my head has been hurting because I'm still not over my concussion and I also probably did too much today, even though honestly all I did was go to one class and observe the whole time, and read a couple of emails. And I thought to myself, "well I guess I should take tylenol for my head, and I guess I can give myself permission to do that since my boyfriend is busy and can't tell me to take care of myself --- oh."

I have been waiting for someone to give me permission to identify as chronically ill! Even today I was like "I feel like I've managed to convince myself that I feel worse than I actually do, and I'm actually fine." Even though there would be no real reason for me to be doing that. And like. My head actually hurts! I really did and still do feel tired! And I've seen my test results, and I know that I have a chronic condition. It's been medically confirmed by a bunch of different tests, and multiple medical professionals have been like "yep you've got something wrong with you" (though using more professional and kind words, of course). All of this to say -- I have been waiting for someone to tell me that I am ill and it is chronic and that it is okay to spend money on taking care of myself and things that will make me feel better, even if it is only temporary like the excitement of buying a new pouch that says "This Bag Is Full of Drugs" specifically to keep my medical supplies in, or something to help keep me safe going forward like a medical alert key chain. The only question now is -- what do I do about this? How do I give myself permission to need help or extra accommodations or even just some medication when I never want to admit that I need or want help? I'm so used to being self-sufficient and doing everything by myself that I don't know how to be okay with more problems.

Has anyone else experienced something like this? What do you do? How do you learn to be okay with the fact that your body is not going to go back to the way it was before? I am only 22 and it's hard to accept that my life is not going to look the way I pictured it when I was 18.

#this post got a lot longer than i meant it to but it sort of turned into journaling halfway through #hopefully people still read it? #hopefully it was not too long to be worth reading? #it's just hard because like. i Already have dealt with a lot of problems in my life #and the whole reason i've been trying so hard to avoid getting covid and getting sick in general #among other reasons #is that i already have Ailments and i don't want more meds to worry about and things that have to be on my radar #and now with this diagnosis it's like yeah i have confirmation so at least the waiting to know is off my radar #but now i have more meds to worry about and more Scheduling that has to be done #plus i've already been pill shamed in the past by my older sister just for taking adhd meds #i don't want to get more shit from her for this #idk dude #just a lot on my plate and now there's more and it makes everything more complicated and harder #at least my boyfriend has been amazing though #he has been so supportive through everything and like he still wants to marry me and everything and it just feels really good #to have his support like that #i know people make jokes about someone talking about their partner and it's just their boyfriend matt #but my boyfriend matt really is my partner in everything and i love him #go matt #everyone applaud for matt #if you read this far into the tags i think you should get a cookie #and i hope you had/have a good day today #also though matt was like 'maybe you should get a cane for times when you have to stand up for a long time' and #idk if i'm ready for that #or if it's even necessary #idk #lots of things #too many things even #i'm tired of there being things #ALSO if anyone read this far and has any product recommendations that made their life easier please lmk