#but there's value in every interaction

[baby-girl-aaron-dessner]

#zero critical thinking skills in this fandom I’m afraid #too many of yall are celebrity worshippers who want tay to interact with her public persona as much as possible #just so that you can consume as much pop culture news as possible #please find other things to be interested in #you don’t have to know every detail of her relationship #y’all hate introverts too and it’s so obvious #your praise her when she valued her privacy and now you look back on that and say she was in jail? #taylor swift #taylorswift #ts #the tortured poets department #ttpd #joe alwyn #swifties #yall need to learn to not place value on superficial Hollywood celebrity gossip

[toiletplomeek]

love being a gay science nerd and writing spock. i understand him like no one does

#star trek #spirk #spock #i just KNOW he would calculate the p value that jim likes him and cry if it was > .05 #he out here adding up every interaction with him and plotting it on a scatter plot and drawing a little wavy line through the random dots 💀

[jemmo]

i finally got the time to watch love is better the second time around and im not at all shocked that im obsessed with the adult second chance at love jbl - have you met me.

but it also needs to be known that shiraishi is my beloved, the actor plays this role so perfectly and i want my bitchy sad gay to find true love

#love is better the second time around #also i adore the mains a whole fucking lot #iwagawa is the perfect mix of pathetic and desperate veiled in cocky and sophisticated #and miyata’s character is just a gem like the way he has transformed from his younger self is so refreshing to see #like this is a kid that was so pure and sweet and open and when he believed that all got trampled on he didn’t let it go to the extreme of #becoming hard and emotionless instead he really has just matured into an adult that actually cares for and values himself #like that hurt made him feel worthless but now he knows he isn’t worthless #like he internalised it through the way he protects himself from others but he does it both to not feel that hurt again but also bc he #thinks well of himself and i just adore the fact we get to see a timid kid grow into someone with self-respect it’s so cool and refreshing #and even when it comes at his detriment bc he won’t let himself believe iwagawa is being honest or that he’s ever been - that it’s all just #a joke or teasing or whatever it’s not frustrating bc you both get where it comes from but also feel like you can support him pushing him #away bc he does it for himself and for the person he’s become #so like… to watch a show where you’re both deeply rooting for the couple but also support when they push each other away… idk how they did #it but they did. the premise is simple and the show is simple but every moment and interaction is electric and thrilling and that’s the kind #of show i love. one that can convey how seemingly interactions are full of tension and stakes for these people. it’s so hard to convey that #but this show nails it and i just can’t get enough now.

[rohirric-hunter]

I'm going to make a series of mods called 'It's Not a Bug, It's a Feature' specifically designed to make Skyrim worse and less playable.

#Children can fly but they cant land #All weapon enchantments have had their values increased to 40000 starting #Surprise! I manually deleted all the facegen data #Actually no not that one scratch that one #I swapped a bunch of models around randomly and renamed every interactive object in the world to random Latin words #Sometimes buckets are secretly dragons #Sometimes dragons are secretly buckets #One that just sets the final boss of bleak falls barrow to essential so you cant progress the game #I deleted the floors in all nord ruins (inspired by a fun mod conflict I had when I first started) #Ulfric Stormcloak follows you everywhere #He's not hostile or anything he's just there #You've seen mods that replace frostbite spiders with nords #now get ready for the mod that replaces nords with frostbite spiders #They are hostile and passive and quest-essential NPCs have also been replaced #The cc fishing but all you pull up are daedric artifacts #Beds can now walk around and may strike up a forced conversation with the player about the last person to sleep on them #(Somehow this was always maven blackbriar. She eats crackers in bed btw) #Also the beds are always hostile after this conversation ends #Getting arrested makes your hands bound like they are in the intro #You have to track down hadvar or ralof to untie you again every time

[m1d-45]

on a scale of 1 to 10 — 1 being the least and 10 being the most — how confident are you in surviving an imposter sagau situation?

short answer: i, a non-native in terrain i’ve only ever navigated with 1) a glider 2) no fear of death 3) via a vessel 4) with a map, against various well trained armies, all hellbent on killing me? you’re funny.

now, the long answer…

the long answer, of course, depends on your preferred brand of isekai, as well as the various traits within that. i will… attempt at brevity, but cannot make promises. oh, and there’s no particular order to this list.

1) blood. i myself am more inclined to blue over gold, but that doesn’t matter for this topic. what does matter is if its present and if it manifests immediately.

2) teyvat. is the earth on my side? do the plants and animals know it’s me, or do i need to ‘prove’ it? does it resent me for whatever reason? what’s it’s level of influence (which sounds dumb, but do i have the power of earthquakes and storms or just a few animal helpers?)

3) the imposter situation itself. is there a physical imposter already there,and if so what’s their level of influence? origin? i’d rather go against a wayward traveller than celestia’s puppet. do they have powers? how does teyvat react to them, if at all?

4) speaking of, celestia. are they on my side, the fake’s(if there is one), or staying neutral? what brand of sagau are we even using here? i know i made a post about my version of sagau lore, but one of the key changes since then was celestia. what version of lore are we following?

5) teyvat’s people, emphasis on vision wielders. do they have that subconscious Know? do their visions act up? how do the people overall feel about the one on the throne, if there is one? if there isn’t, is celestia involved in their opinions somehow? what about the traveller, or my vessels?

6) my influence. what can i do? do i have creator abilities, and if so do they take time/some other cue to manifest? is it something i train, or just Click one day? what level? is it an element by element basis, like the traveller, or does that not apply to me? do i have an inventory? if so, can i access the character menus? the map? waypoints? can i move my party, still? do statues of the seven heal me, does food heal me, how do hillichurls and various abyssal beings react to me? ancient gods, such as rhodea (i spelled that wrong) or dvalin or that fucker in the sea outside liyue (yeah i. forgot his name) or azhdaha or yo(u?)kai, if i’m in inazuma? where are we in the in-game lore, by the way?

7) teyvat, again, but this time in terms of biology. i have a few headcanons about teyvat, notably that their gravity is lesser (less fall damage), weather less severe (global warming), and is overall much more temperate/cooler/less humid (global warmingx2 and also just a touch of idealism), so do these apply? this ties into the other points about teyvat, i guess: does the earth let me get cold? can i just shelter in dragonspine?

8) plot armor, for lack of better phrasing. will teyvat let me die? oh, and do i get timeloop’d, or kicked back to my world? do i die, go to my world, then go back to teyvat when i sleep/next log on/whatever? again, tying into other points about teyvat, but will it protect me from death? is my skin like impenetrable or something, or whoops, god is dead, sorry. if i revive in teyvat, is it like that one recent piece i did where the earth moves me? what happens when (if?) i die? does teyvat take revenge?

the long answer… is that it depends.

#m1d : [chats] #hi. i’m midas. and with every answer i give im always told to ‘take it at face value’ or to ‘stop reading into it’ #nice to meet you. i couldn’t answer a question in econ because i was thinking about details over just An Answer #and then i couldn’t even lie and say something because my answers matter to me and i can’t just LIE to a teacher #i regularly get Fs in social interactions and As in english classes. call that autism swag #(if you’re curious it was ‘what fictional character would you have as a friend’ but i fixated on the semantics) #(are they coming here? am i going there? do they remember their source or know i don’t belong? i’d feel guilty taking them away and they-) #(-might miss somebody ! is it a ‘go to a reality where they were always here’ and if so would they be who i think they are?) #(i ended up lying anyway with ‘i read too much into the question’ bevause that ISNT too much those are PERFECTLY LOGICAL QUESTIONS TO ASK) #(to neurotypicals it’s ‘reading into it’ to me it’s a little something called ‘critical thought and also empathy’)

[laugtherhyena]

Kizuna comphet lesbian is a headcanon that you'll need to chop off my hands if you wanna take it from me

#look i know that this sounds borderline unbelievable when you think of Kizuna at face value but hear me out #has Kizuna ever show genuine attraction towards men? #she flirts and goes around with guys for what they can give her (money. gifts. protection. etc) the story makes that incredibly clear #because she was taught by her mother + the environment she grew up in that it's men who are gonna give her the things she wants #and girls are “competition” of sorts #and I know there's her interactions with Yuki in her FTEs #but Kizuna gets bothered that he's not falling for her advances not because she genuinely likes him #but because she wants to get something out of him. like she does with literally every other guy #when he doesn't fall for it she takes that as an insult because of how normal he is in comparison #to other guy's she's gotten wrapped around her finger. she's mad that he didn't fall for her trap not that he doesn't like her back #the FTEs make that clear #and while there are some other lines from the final FTEs and that extra one you get from giving her a specific item #they read to me more like a mixture of Kizuna trying to leave her old habits and her teasing/messing with Yuki #like i REALLY can't see those as genuine romantic attraction #and that's saying something because as much as i dislike Ayame's final FTEs her talk with Yuki there feels more like a genuine crush/romance #than the ones Kizuna has with him in her final FTEs. you know what I'm saying? #anyways. that's the ramble for today 🥰 #dra #danganronpa another #kizuna tomori #hyena ramblings

[siiin]

yk i commission a lot of art for someone who never posts it. whats the deal with that?

anyway here's douglas-allan mackenzie; some dude for a bogo comm post as visualized by the wonderful artistry of @isa-ah! im very grateful for the fact he was able to do this character design justice, as i cannot draw to save my life -idk if anyone else gets this, but i cant exactly 'see' what im seeing mentally, like i can tell you hex codes or show you preexisting things that are akin to what im thinking of, but i cant translate my visual idea to a physical form without it looking like a ransom note dreamcore collage- so thats all to say i really truly appreciate working with this artist (ㅅˊ͈ ˘ ˋ͈) ₊˚⊹✧

and also please cheer and clap for isaiah on the right in the first pic there, literally one of the guys of all time, he and doug are both mechanics!! so thats cool and fun, super dope

normally id add commission pieces to toyhou.se galleries since. thats my main haunt as a writer*, but doug is an integral character to nikita's story so im going to be keeping them together in his gallery instead

—pls lmk if you need a th code, i have like a just so many —[gallery] - [story info; wip. ik. (╥ᆺ╥；)] [*] debatable

#.ocs #funfact we used to fuck with moodboards a Lot back in the day bc those things could convey so much. now we got picrew?? unstoppable #but sometimes i do value being able to commission the awesome artists i work up the nerve to ask cus they never miss #literally every image in that gallery link/comm post under my recommended tab? banger after banger #the artists are also very pleasant and rad to interact with 👍

[wild-at-mind]

Had a really stupid conversation via minor emotional breakdown with a queer friend about what makes an LGBTQ person 'assimilist'. From what she said I'm kind of forced to draw the conclusion 'if you say you're not assimilist, then you're not'.

#i love her but none of it makes any sense to me #i think i really just wanted her to see that this kind of rhetoric is no good if you're fundamentally unable to see yourself as having valu #to a community- which is where i'm still at sometimes unfortunately. #i would say that i may not be the only one since mental illness + self esteem issues + being lgbtq are not exactly unlinked #but i have basically never found anyone else who has my particular hangups...maybe online once ages ago #so in my own mind i'm the most assimilist lgbtq who ever existed- not even worthy to call myself queer #and it's nice that she thinks i am not like that and in fact am 'one of the good ones' #who is not assimilist- look i know that 'one of the good ones' usually means the opposite ok i know! it's just an impression i get #she's like telling me obviously i'm all good because i look like i do but all i can hear is #that if i didn't look like this then i'm an assimilist #i fucking hate my brain honestly no one asked me to have a mental breakdown at their house (thank god i didn't cry) #and then go home and that's when i cry because i saw a trans guy's 'this many years on t' post and i felt like shit because #i haven't done anything about transitioning in ages and i'm not even out at work :'( #like i know i'm an assimilist because my main reason for not coming out at work is not wanting to do the beaurocracy #of changing my name on my email and every fucking log in i have on everything- telling every single person i interact with #i just can't it's too much and my line manager is worse than useless #but i have 'my job is computer and doing emails all day' privilege so i don't like to talk to people about it

[mxdotpng]

for being a monster of the week type manga nightow does a really good job at making each and every episode relevant. i think having zed's introduction, the lunch chapter, zapp & zed's short chapter, and then zed's backstory chapter lead up to each other slowly despite being in separate seasons and separated by other plotlines was a really great way to build up zapp, leo, and zed's relationship. you can very clearly see their transition from (begrudging) coworkers to friends. in back 2 back, zed's backstory chapter to the finale where he defended leo's choice in front of the other libra members felt so significant, because leo had done something similar before hand, and at the cost of his own health. then, the many instances of steven having his own scenes, often alone, cemented the idea of him being entirely okay with dubious or morally grey actions "for the sake of peace", often at his own hypocrisy when trusting klaus' methods, which again came up in the back 2 back finale. i think i could just keep going and going but you get my point. and i love them.

#.text #kekkai sensen #in particular i think i really love that klaus's scenes dont. necessarily change him. they just expand on what he already is #this unflinching 'hero' who fights for justice. he looks monsters in the eyes and asks for them to surrender #even when he knows it isnt an option #i particularly really really love the chapter with the yakuza. because it parallels the finale SO MUCH #he is unable to stop the tragedy before it occurs. and there is this kid in the middle of it all being hurt and taken for granted #and he protects them without a second thought. #or how every time chain gets a centered appearance she gets more and more open and talkative and Kind and playful #its so CUTE i love her btw. did u know. shes soooo cute i LOVEE her #ahem. #anyway #i dont think theyve branched up enough on KK yet i hope she gets more spotlights in b3b but you can see how much #she values her family. so so much. and how that extends towards her coworkers #like she cares about steven and klaus so much and that begins to extend towards leo and i WISH we got to see her #interact with everyone else more. chain and KK team up NOW #but you know. they make me sooo emotional i LOVEEE them

[itspileofgoodthings]

me to Nina yesterday: explaining how due to a headache and exhaustion I wasted away the end of my afternoon just watching Ryan Gosling interviews

Nina, instantly sympathetic: and I completely understand that, a valid thing to do

#the thing about Nina is that most of the time she not only hates my coping mechanisms she also plain doesn’t understand them #one of the many tensions of our relationship #but she was just 100% like yeah. I fully get it #and it made me feel so much better #my relationship with Nina the work of a lifetime because the moments of mutual understanding are so rare #but so powerful when they happen. and it takes years to discover that sudden gold #(my mom is often so troubled by our relationship. she’s just like (whisper voice): do you guys even like each other) #because we’re just SO sparks fly (antagonistic version) in many of our interactions #and it’s just like. YEAH. We’re just going to have an intense altercation and clashing of opinions viewpoints values and perspectives #at least every other day. LOL #but we will navigate it! #no one on the planet I smooth things over with as fast as Nina. it is lightning-speed reconciliation #because we both move on so quickly in the same way. in that the mood will just lift #we got in a fight the other day. Nina left and stormed out. 10 minutes later I get a text going #‘I’m sorry Maria. I should not have said that about your mother’ #which made me laugh because we weren’t fighting about our mom. She just likes to quote Jacqueline from ever after sometimes out of context #and my mom was on the couch watching me like ‘you’re reconciled???? It’s over?????????’ #because my mom a) is so different from both of us in the speed she processes in and b) has no sisters #0 sisters. 4 daughters. and she still isn’t used to it lol. because my mom’s strength and weakness is that she never gets used to anything! #ALSO Nina told me the other day that I’m the one that taught her to apologize because I would just make her do it when we were kids #not to me but to other people! I would just sit there and explain how verbal acknowledgement of wrongdoing would make things better #and she was always like ‘ughhh I hate it so much. FINE’ because she always does want to make things better #anyway this SHOOK ME TO MY CORE. Because I never thought Nina actually internalized any of the things I’ve said to her ever lol #and she was like ‘yeah you gave me that good habit’ #(I love apologizing. Love to put it into words and I have an intense need to do it immediately and thoroughly) #(tbh it’s only with time that I’ve come to see that other people do not work that way. and need more time. and are not just — #instantly comfortable putting everything into words especially the hard things) #(because it’s not like I’m always driven by more charity and compunction. I just ducking HATE unresolved things not put into words) #(so it helps me feel better. and sometimes you just gotta learn to not say it right away if it’s only going to make things worse #(or learn to say it in different way without words. that actually communicates the sorrow. And that can sometimes look like giving space!)

[raedas]

oh that poll is going to annoy me so bad

#THEYRE DIFFERENT FORMATS OF FICTION. ITS NOT A VALUE JUDGEMENT… #people calling it elitist to not consider fanfiction books is just…. idk. what. huh #and also being lke. it counts as reading!!!!!!!!!! like yes great the poll asked if it counts as reading books #and then someone being like ‘i challenge everyone who’s voting no to read [long fic] that’s like 800 pages when bound’ great i have read #multiple fics over a MILLION words and i loved them!!! and they’re great quality!!! THEYRE STILL FANFICTION M #sure there are places where the distinction mighttttbe a little fuzzy with like public domain and whatnot but like #for the most part. those are two different things with two different meanings. almost every conflation of the two is a reactionary argument #and often just creating a value judgment WHEN THERE WASNT ONE TO BEGIN WITH #i enjoy fic and i enjoy books for vastly different reasons they give me different emotions and i interact with them differently!!! maybe you #interact with them the same way! great! they’re still different though. #shamsisms

[tomwambsgans]

me having a conversation with my mom about her childhood: wow just like succession...

#mine #this isnt remotely a joke i see everything through the lens of succession now #in fact i think ive learned to value familial relationships for the first time in my life #bc of it #like instead of actively forgetting about every interaction with any of them immediately after #and not factoring it into my concept of myself at all #now i come away from sibling and mom interactions- even bad ones- #ESPECIALLY bad ones #feeling good on some level bc i feel more like a real person #and more like in tune with the characters i like lol

[aeide-thea]

thinking about all the women whose orbits i've had to remove myself from bc they meant too much to me while i meant too little to them

#i don't talk abt this particular feeling much bc i'm not entirely convinced it's a value-neutral sort of incompatibility— #i tend to feel it's an indication of my own fundamental warping‚ that i get greedy and codependent and desperate and can't just be chill #and that it probably has something to do with the fucked-up codependent relationship model i was raised with #but it really is just like. from the high school friendship i had to drop even though i was besotted (flavor undefined) with her #bc i couldn't handle being Just One of Many Hangers-On‚ even though she said she valued and cared abt me #to the metamour i adored (flavor undefined) who supposedly valued and cared abt me too‚ but‚ like‚ not enough #to the ex-moot who remade who i really mournfully decided i couldn't re-follow bc i couldn't stop pedestalizing her #out of all proportion with the actual intimacy of our actual interactions… #idk. just feels like. very much a Recurrent Pattern for me and not a great one! #(and like. obviously the easy read here is that it was unrequited love every time; and who knows‚ maybe it was— #but it's never been obvious to me what the exact flavor of the thing was‚ just that it was sweet and tangy until eventually it stung) #anyway. i would say 'idk what even got me onto this' but actually i know exactly what got me onto this #which was: reading fic where half the pairing was aro #and like. in the fic it worked for them‚ and like‚ in life it's so often been so close to working for me! #but then the black hole of Undefined Sad Yearning inevitably starts to gape #anyway. hashtag nightblogging ig‚ lol #feelingsblogging #past lives #the psyche #(eta thinking abt it more this has also sometimes happened with trans ppl of various non-woman stripes #but in those instances i *have* just mentally filed the dynamic under (failed/abortive) romance+‚ i think #honestly very possible that's where every instance of it belongs and it's just that i don't know how to be in love with women. #like i don't identify as not-attracted-to-women‚ i'm definitely attracted to women— #'sometimes‚' i started to say‚ but like. i'm attracted to women at the same rate i'm attracted to people of other genders‚ really— #but like. societal queerphobia really does a number on you. #like. not that playing the woman's part in the cishet relationship-escalator model appeals or makes any sense for me either #but at least it's‚ idk‚ something to kick off from?? #whereas with women it's just like. a ladder into mysterious fog. how do. where go. #insane to me that i'm this old and yet this is still where i am with this. god.)

[hobisexually]

why is January 2929293929 days long this year

#every day I wake up and . don’t want to #every day I have to drag myself to work and be entirely unhappy #and take every micro interaction as rejection #every day I think I have to push myself onto people in order to reach out and get what I want #but every time I’ve tried at work I don’t get it #and all my friends have a person that’s more important than me and I’m left behind #(the people I see every day or used to that is) #I attached so much of my value to work because it was the one thing I had a passion for #the one thing I could do #and now that’s gone and what the fuck do I have left #every day I sit at work and want to be so angry at everyone and I am but I’m also not and that’s what makes it worse #because I love them!!!!! I do!!!!!! but I get treated like SHIT #and everyone pretends it’s normal? #And then advises me to be More Forward in what I want? #when all I’ve been DOING is dragging myself out of comfort zones I have never been this uncomfortable ever and for WHAT #every day I’m in actual physical pain that MAYBE a surgery will be able to fix #every day I have to fight my piece of shit anxiety and seasonally depressed brain #every day I have to do physical therapy exercises or yoga or pelvic floor shit or mental therapy or whatEVER the fuck just to #find a sliver? of happiness somewhere? #And for WHAT #it hasn’t gotten me anywhere has it it hasn’t gotten me anything I wanted #tomorrow I’ll be able to look at the things I built and be happy about it again (maybe) #but today? #it’s a bad day #it’s such a BAD FUCKING DAY #I have cried every day since Sunday so far which is not normal for me I cry like five times a year usually #and my brain is screaming at me to isolate myself because at #least that way I’ll be safe from disappointing anyone #I hate when it’s a dark pit like this but what the fuck man #also the state of the goddamn world is. bad. and making me spiral worse and I just . 🫠🫠🫠🫠🫠🫠🫠🫠

[eclipsecrowned]

you ever just marvel that you’re living rent free slamming doors in the head of sb you haven’t thought of in months.

#Anon if you had not said that i would not have known. #But it is genuinely not my problem and if you are correct and that is a vague about me clearly others agree with me too. #I don’t need heads up about this person unless I get weird messages when they inevitably unblock me to start shit. Again. #Then I just want to know if it’s them harassing me again then claiming I’m hurting them somehow. Thank you. #out of stories #drama // #Not about anyone on the dash/anyone my moots interact w! #I just have a former collaborator that if I’m right is stalking the fuck out of my blog. #Every so often I have to pull the post equivalent of firing a gun to drive down property values. #So they keep my name out of their mouth for five minutes.

[mellomadness]

sometimes I wonder if I should take a gender studies class just so I can bitch every day about how an imaginary boyfriend is often seen as a requirement for a woman to feel safe enough to have fun at a club, or the idea that an imaginary person with a fake “claim” over me has more influence over predatory men than my own voice saying “No, I’m not interested, get lost”

#venting #hnnnnng the double standard is really really making my teeth hurt recently #(in that I’m grinding my jaw at the mere thought of this particular breed of injustice) #I honestly miss going out with my friends. I miss going to bars and clubs and enjoying the night #but I wanna go with my friends and leave my boyfriend at home for once #he gets to go out and enjoy himself all the time with his friends and they never even have to deal with unwanted flirtation #meanwhile I go out in a tshirt and jeans and get fucking catcalled or flirted with just fucking getting groceries #and it’s not a narrative on beauty or anything. it’s about men’s perception of women #specifically predatory men and men who don’t realize they’re BEING predatory #perhaps it’s because I’ve been going to this fucking gamer school for far too long #and I’ve interacted with so many socially inept/incel men from there #who don’t know what no means or dont take women seriously when they do say no #or they literally cannot read between the lines of a woman politely declining their advances #‘but she was being so nice to me’ yeah bc if she wasn’t you’d either call her a bitch or try to force her anyway #anyway. I’m angry #im tired of living in fear of morons #I’m tired of not being able to go out on a Tuesday night and just walk the town with my friends #specifically my femme friends #we should be at the club!! instead we’re trying to make sure the group is like a school of fish so we’re less of a target #and like. I could talk about this on twt or reddit but. cmon. let’s be real here #MelloMoans #really does feel like we’re going backwards when it comes to gender equality and feminism #especially with the influx of the whole sigma male/high value male bullshit #I understand how it came to be I really do but that plus the whole pick me girl thing is just another toxic view of gender identity #and all it has resulted in on both sides is a wider degree of separation between the genders #therefore allowing both extremes to dehumanize every one that doesn’t identify as sigma male or not like other girls YET AGAIN #(and therefore also opens up the door for dehumanizing lgbtq+ folks but. let’s be real. that hasn’t really gone away yet :/