#don't let them

[anxious-black-hottie]

#ashanti #don't let them #2000s #my upload #mine #mines

[talaricula]

Things I've seen tumblr memeing about James Somerton doing à la "How did no one see how bigoted he was!" as if those things haven't been a significant part of tumblr culture for over a decade :

Presenting untrue and bordering on conspiratorial versions of (queer or otherwise marginalised) history without any sources

Completely disregarding and disrespecting any expertise on socio-cultural topics/humanities and distrusting academics and historians (incl. acting as if no academics or historians could be queer or marginalised)

Downplaying the role misogyny played in the historical oppression of queer women and concluding that queer men must have been more oppressed than queer women

Bi women are, at best, not as queer as "real" queer ppl, and at worst, simply equivalent to straight women

Despite nominal trans inclusivity, transmasculine ppl are functionally women when convenient (combined with the above, bi transmascs are functionally straight women)

Despite nominal trans inclusivity (bis), shamelessly attacking, threatening and actively endangering any trans woman who questions them or smth they find important (often by unfairly presenting her as violent or as a threat)

Having absolutely fucking wild and reductive takes about ace ppl, the oppression they face and their place in the queer community

Stating that marriage equality is an assimilationist fight while completely ignoring its direct roots in the horrifying consequences of the AIDS crisis for partners of ppl who died of AIDS

Praising western media creators from the past for queer coding even under censure and in the same breath condemning current non western media creators for being homophobic bc their representation isn't explicit enough

Blaming China for all existing homophobic censoring in western media

Assuming all queer media would be better told by western creators and by western standards

Only out queer ppl get to tell queer stories

Heavily criticising almost all queer media created by women or ppl they see as such (see above points about trans ppl) or involving/starring a significant amount of women for any perceived or real amount of "problematicness", but fawning over and praising and negating criticism of queer media created by and starring mostly or even functionally exclusively men (even when it could be argued that, you know, not involving/seriously sidelining women is a pretty clear example of misogyny which should probably be considered "problematic")

And I'm probably forgetting stuff or there's stuff I have internalised myself and don't recognise as an issue

Like idk but I feel like the takeaway from Hbomberguy and Toddintheshadow's videos should maybe be "be aware of such patterns in your communities bc they definitely exist" and not "this guy is uniquely awful" and I feel like a lot of the discussion I've seen surrounding this has been severely failing at that. Most ppl who've spent any significant amount of time on tumblr prob either have internalised at least one of those thought patterns, have had to de-internalise them, or have had to be extremely vigilant to not internalise them (which is done by, you know, seeking out other sources, which also seemed like an important takeaway from the videos)

#Also I'm saying this as someone who actually watched quite a few of Somerton's videos #And noticed those patterns and stopped watching bc I recognised them from here #and had already learned to unlearn them after being so exposed to them here #And tbh I think anyone who hasn't had the luck or made the conscious choice to seek out ppl who pushed against those narratives #Would absolutely have fallen for this man's bullshit. Like let's not kid ourselves we see takes like this every day on this hellsite #2014 me would have. For sure. #This is next to the plagiarism issue which as Harris points out is an Internet wide issue and this includes tumblr #James Somerton #hbomberguy #todd in the shadows #This brought to you by a conversation with my wife yesterday #So many ppl on here don't deserve to meme or be this self absolvingly critical of this man #The call is coming from inside the house #The man has a tumblr it would legit not surprise me if some of the things he supposedly made up himself he did actually get from somewhere #And that somewhere was a tumblr post

[localrobosexual]

literally fuck companies that don't want their employees to act "unprofessional" in front of customers. I'm at a five guys rn and the employees here are joking around calling orders back and forth to each other and saying things in weird voices and laughing with each other while they work. Someone just came in for their shift while I was waiting for my food and was greeted by the whole kitchen with a secret handshake lookin thing. It was so silly and cute I love seeing ppl have fun at work and I know my food's gonna be bomb bc the ppl there are having fun with each other. Let employees be people and friends and have fun what is the issue!!!!

#words of meg #i do the exact shit too with my coworkers #granted i don't work customer service but still #humans are fun and silly #let them be fun and silly

[arnesisapseudonym]

My biggest flex is that I’m normal on discord and I can keep my sanity when tired and I’m very very very chaste and and and and

#The opposition may try to convince you otherwise #don't let them

[inkskinned]

it's been said before and i'm sure said better than i can phrase it. but really, really - if you like making "i'm going to kill myself" jokes, please try switching to being ironically conceited instead.

anytime something goes wrong, say things like "ah well at least i'm beautiful and charming and everyone loves me." when you forget something, try "my big huge brain is so smart and thinking about too many other very big wizardly thoughts you wouldn't even understand." when you're frustrated by one of your symptoms, start talking like you're in My Immortal. "Life has come for me but my eyes are beautiful pools of gorgeous fire and my hair is amazing. I stuck my middle finger up at life and told it to fuck off and it did."

just... try it for a month or two. try saying the most absurdly self-congratulatory shit you can think of.

i know it's tempting to make suicide or self-harm jokes. and for me at least, a decade ago (!) when someone suggested i stop making those kinds of jokes, i was kind of at a loss for what to replace them with. i wanted to make light of these moments, but genuinely (at the time) my first thought really was suicidal ideation. there was a part of me that even felt like ... i was kind of "making light" of that voice. that if i could say i want to die lol, it would help take the sting out of that genuine (albeit passive) desire. like i could turn my illness into a joke.

when i started complimenting myself instead, it felt awkward and stupid. it felt really, really ironic. what i was actually saying was nobody would ever think this stuff about me, that's what makes it so fucking funny.

but. the effect was immediate. first thing i noticed was the people around me. when i dropped a glass and said ah my skin is too beautiful and sleek the glass has swooned and broken for me, other people were suddenly overjoyed to jump in with the joke. rather than making an awkward moment, we'd both start cracking up. ah princess sleek hands, i've heard of you.

i was 19. i hadn't noticed i'd been making others tense when i said i want it all to end. i know now that it's incredibly hard to know how to walk that moment - do you talk to them about your concern? do you potentially make them uncomfortable by asking if they're okay? do you ignore the situation? do you help them pick up the glass, or do they need to do it by themselves? are they genuinely made suicidal over this small moment? and most importantly, how do you - without professional training or supplies - actually help?

most people want to help you pick up the glass in your life, they just have no fucking idea how to do it. they don't want to make anything worse. they don't want to make assumptions about you. they love you, they're scared for you - and being scared makes people kind of freeze up. it's not because they don't love you. it's because they do.

now when something bad happens, my first thought is how can i make a stupid joke about this. it isn't my brain saying you're a dumb fucking bitch. i spend more time laughing. i spend more time being gentle with myself. i spend more time feeling good.

and the thing is - what's kind of funny - is that you'd be surprised by how many people agree with you. the first time i said i'm too pretty to understand that, someone else said to be fair you're the prettiest person in this room. i promise - you really don't know how kindly your friends see you. but they love you for a reason. they sort of reverse-velveteen-rabbit you. your weird and ugly spots fade away and you just become... the love they want to give you.

go love yourself ironically. the worst thing that happens is that you end up tricking your reflection into actually loving you.

#something something toxic relationships notwithstanding #(re: the friends stuff) #most people love you. automatically. for being alive. like people are just MADE that way. #and the reason kms jokes don't always land is bc people fucking love you and are like - ahhh how do i help #let them help you!!!!!!

[ionomycin]

Forest Guardians

#artists on tumblr #starting off 2024 with my favorite totally normal size animal the moose #if you've seen a big one irl you know what i mean #the year is starting with seemingly every big corporation hopping on the A I train #depressing #keep on creating my fellow artists #and crafters and writers #and musicians and voice actors #don't let them automate the fun out of your life #i don't care if machines can make art more “efficiently” #i don't want to be efficient! #i want to be unhinged! #be unhinged about your art draw your blorbos draw the things that claw at your brain don't be civil about it like the machines #whatever you're creating i'm proud of you

[heyimboredtalktome]

#i needed this #call the places by their original names #don't let them paint over it #FREE PALESTINE #palestine #fuck israel #free gaza #gaza #gaza strip #death to israel

[biggest-gaudiest-patronuses]

finally at that age where i'm thinking i should get a tattoo. not bc i feel strongly about it, just seems like a waste not to. i've got so much skin i'm not using

#feels so selfish like. all this skin what am i saving it for? #open to design suggestions! (please make me regret this offer) #maybe some deep sea horrors. a pretty watercolor of a gulper eel #once saw a person on the subway with various Skeleton Tattoos on all their limbs #i respected their commitment to the theme #but more than that i respected how all the skeletons were engaged in Activities #dancing in a ballgown. juggling its own (and two other???) skulls. swordfighting. being a mermaid skeleton #ANYWAY. the only reason i haven't already gotten tattoos is i just couldn't be bothered #i'm old enough to know i don't have any strong-but-potentially-temporary feelings driving me towards it #aesthetically i prefer decorated to non-decorated surfaces. but i'm not artistic or thrilled with commitment #honestly it feels like sheer laziness. indecisiveness--nay. immaturity!--that i HAVEN'T gotten a tattoo yet #letting all this blank canvas go to waste. tut tut i need to grow up and be an adult and get a tattoo sleeve already. #really i've put off my responsibilities long enough #(in fairness i DID at one time have 18 different piercings) #(but i took most of them out bc they interfere with wearing headphones and/or shoving my face in my pillow during Sleep Time) #(i only kept the nape piercing bc oddly enough it ended up being the most convenient. and the least painful to get now i think about it.) #(neck piercing? no problem. normal pair of earrings? Tribulations And Suffering. i don't make the rules i just poke them with a stick.)

[arataka-reigen]

I'm trying to start a movement here

[ID: The first 3 images are edited versions of the "Let's take ibuprofen together" meme. The captions now say "Let's read shoujo together". They each show a person holding their hand out to the viewer; a character from the series Benigyokuzui, Mob from Mob Psycho 100, and Jerma. / end ID]

ID provided by @siroofington thank you so much

#and don't even think shoujo is just romance. you cant even begin to understand the rich world of shoujo. join me in this beautiful journey. #let's read shoujo together #<my tags from that other shoujo post #i was definitely referencing the let's take ibuprofen together meme #gi talks #shoujo #anime #shounen #my happy marriage #natsume yuujinchou #akatsuki no yona #requiem of the rose king #colette decides to die #basara #just tagging a few off the top of my head that don't include only romance so more people can check them out #i haven't read all of them but i heard great thinga #josei #josei is also a dying art form and i'll just lump josei and shoujo together tbh #kimi ni todoke #1k #gi talks animanga #1 #b

[chewingbatmanlikeasqueakytoy]

Danny should absolutely rip on the Flashes

Realistically, Danny meeting the flashes and having any of them deny the existence of magic/saying "magic is just science we don't understand yet" should be met with ENDLESS mockery. Like come on The flashfam WORKS with gods, magic users, some of the JL/JLD are literally demons and ghosts. Diana/WW was MADE FROM CLAY in some canons!

Scepticism on that level should ABSOLUTELY be met with "I didn't know the Justice League worked with flat earthers" Type scorn. The burns should be third degree. The fatalities wide spread. No one who lives in a world with that much evidence of magic should be allowed to carry "magic isn't real" as an opinion and not be derided for having their head in the sand. As I understand it the scepticism comes out of the flash comics from like, the 60-80's which fair but the other heroes stories had to accommodate for each other when the crossovers started happening so I feel it's only fair to have men of logic like the flashes (so many of them are scientists of some type right?) deduce that yeah magic has to be real ESPECIALLY - When any of the magic users, ANY OF THEM - Could respond with a very simple: "Magic is science you don't understand." "What?" "I understand exactly what I'm doing. I understand exactly what I need to do to get repeat results, and I understand what not to mix not to get undesirable results. What about that implies a lack of understanding? Magic isn't something WE don't understand, magic is something you don't understand."

I enjoy the idea of the flashes being sceptics, I actually enjoy it a lot. Sceptics are very necessary to any narrative, but honestly the magic users deserve a chance to call them out because really having someone call your life's work and very real craft 'not real' 'hoaxes' and essentially parade it around as something they could come to understand better than you if they just looked into it but have made no effort to would be enough to make anyone break their teeth from clenching their jaw so hard.

Essentially early days flashes as sceptics makes total sense. The flashes continuing to have "magic isn't real" as an opinion for too long into the story gives them Flat Earther Level Intellect.

#I mostly envision it to be zatanna sassing the flashes about magic being something they don't understand #Danny is the one calling them out as flat earther level thinkers #this is mostly a thing in the dpxdc fandom as far as ive seen #i dont think it's too much of a trope in the general dc fanon #like guys its fun #but lets not do our boys dirty like this lmao #dpxdc #dcxdp #dp x dc #dc x dp

[anxious-black-hottie]

#ashanti #don't let them #2000s #my upload #mine #mines

[saturdaysky]

when your waterdhavian crush ambushes you with extremely cheesy flirting and to your deep horror, it works

if you respond equally cheesily — "Read it? I could've written the thing 😏😏😏" — he hits you with this:

i'm afraid there was simply no one else for me after that

#i cringed through the entire interaction and it was a delight. wouldn't change a thing #don't let this comic fool you tav is just as bad #terminal levels of earnest swaglessness in this galemance run. love that for them. sorry for the rest of the party #sky does bg3 #gale of waterdeep #gale dekarios #mayhew #bg3 #baldur's gate 3 #galehew

[egophiliac]

Ego this happened and I need to tell another twst fan bc I'm so ahhhhhhh

my Nana (the biggest Disney fan I know) came over for Easter so i show her twst on a whim, bc it's my favorite thing yknow? I show her the characters and the battles, my cards, my guest room, all the good stuff. Then I decide to do a ten pull on mirror bc why not, I have 300 gems and maybe she'll give me luck 🙂

NOT DORM CARD MALLEUS FINALLY COMING HOME AFTER MONTHS OF HEARTBREAK 😭😭

AHHHH congratulations! ...also can your Nana come visit me too, because I have not gotten a SINGLE one of the dorm dias even with rerun pickups. 😭 does Malleus just demand grandma power or something.

#art #...i mean technically it's art i guess #for a given definition #twisted wonderland #i don't think this one needs spoiler tags but at this point i just instinctively go to add them #don't worry malleus being kidnapped by fake grandmas is not in fact a spoiler #but is declaring it not to be a spoiler in itself not its own spoiler? #uhhhhh wait hold on um #let's just say that malleus may or may not get kidnapped by fake grandmas at some point #i'll never tell

[mariyekos]

Okay to reblog to help sample size!

#erurandomness #erubabbles #fanfiction #fanfic #I have a few longfics I've come to realize I'll probably never finish #but they have like 50k words and maybe people would enjoy the beginning? #and i *want* to finish them. I just don't know if I'll ever get that spark back that'll let me finish. it's frustrating #my perfectionism has kind of paralyzed me and a mix of that and drifting fandoms has me wondering #would people like it if i shared them so they could experience what's been written? or is it not worth it if they won't be updated? #fic tag

[inkskinned]

there are a lot of posts out there that are positive and healthy coping mechanisms for handling the holidays. this is not one of them :)

i think there's like. going to be times in your life you will be stuck in a social situation that you cannot escape from gracefully. i do not know why the internet doesn't believe these times exist. it's not always just that your physical safety is at risk - sometimes it's legit like "i just don't currently have the energy or time to put in the effort of responding to this." sometimes it's a coworker you hate so much. sometimes it's just like, fine, you know? like you know you can handle your aunt when she's cheerily horrible, but if you actually set a boundary around her, it's going to be weeks of fallout with your father.

i don't know why people think the answer is always just "cut them out!" or "don't let them get away with that!" because ... the real world is tricky and complicated. i think kind of a lot of us have an internal "radiation poisoning" meter for certain people. like - i'm talking about the ones who are absolutely giving you gradual ick damage. like, you can handle them, but you'll be exhausted.

and yes. you absolutely should listen to your therapist and the good posts about handling others and set good boundaries and take care of yourself. prioritize peace.

HOWEVER :) ...... since im often in a situation with a Gradual Sense of Ick person i cannot just "cut out" of my life (without losing someone else precious to me) - i have sort of developed the most. maladaptive form of mischief possible. because like, if i'm going to have to listen to this shit again, i like to have a little bit of private fun with it.

now! again, i am physically safe, just mentally drained by this man. you should only do this with people you are not in danger with. which leads me to my suggestions for when your Unfortunate Acquaintance shows up and says oh everyone pay attention to me.

my favorite word is "maybe!" said as brightly and happily as possible. whenever the Horrible Person starts in on a topic you do not want to go further with, particularly if they make a claim that you know to be inaccurate, do not respond to it. you and i have both tried to actually argue with this person, and it hasn't gone well, because this person just wants the drama of an argument. however, "maybe!" gives them literally nothing to go on. it is incredibly disarming. they are used to people having some response. they know they can't prove what they're saying, and maybe! treats them like the child they are. it dismisses them in the politest way possible.

i like to say maybe! and then, in their stunned silence, immediately change the subject. this is because i have adhd and i will have something unrelated to talk about, but if you can't think of topics fast enough, i recommend just pointing to something and saying, "isn't that lovely?" because fuck you let's bring in some positivity.

by the way. that second trick - of pointing to something and stating an opinion about it? - that just works on its own, like, 70% of the time. i picked it up from teaching preschoolers. it's an intentional "redirect". it stops children crying and it also stops grown adults from finishing their explanation on why women belong in kitchens. dual wielding!

keep it silly for yourself. i absolutely do not care if people think i'm fucking stupid (it's more fun if they do) and as a result i will purposefully misunderstand things just to see how long it takes them to realize i've completely removed them from the subject at hand. when they say "women aren't funny" i get to be like. "which women." "all women." "all women in america?" "no in the world." "like the mole people? the people in the world?" "what? no. like, alive." "oh are we not counting the mole people?" "what the fuck are you talking about." "you don't believe in the mole people?"

similarly, i play a personal game called "one up me." my Evil Acquaintance literally knows this game exists (my family & friends caught onto it and now also play it) and it always fucking gets him. i don't know why. you have to be willing to be a little free-spirited on this one, though. the trick is that when they make one of those horrible little bigoted or annoying comments they are always making, you need to go one unit weirder. not more intense, mind you - just more weird. "you don't look good in that dress." "yeah, actually, my other dress was covered in squid ink due to a mishap at the soup store." "you shouldn't wear such revealing clothes." "wait, what? oh shit. sorry, your son tears off strips when no one is looking and eats them. i swear it was longer before we left the building."

the point of "one up me" is to completely upend this person's narrative. we both know this person likes setting up situations where you cannot "win" and then they really like telling other people how badly you handled it. in a usual situation, if you respond "please don't say something that rude", you're a bitch. but if you let it happen, you're letting yourself be debased. they are not usually expecting door number three: unflappably odd. because what are they going to say when they're telling everyone how badly you behaved? "she said my son eats her dresses" ".... okay?"

if you can, form an allyship with someone whomst you can tagteam with. where they can pick up on your weird "soup store" story and run with it.

the following phrase is amazing and can be deployed for any situation: "oh, be nice :) it's the holidays!" i do not know why this works as often as it does. i'll say it for the most random shit. i think this is bc most of the time these people know they're being impolite, they just like to fight.

godbless. when in doubt, remember that you could always start stealing their pens.

the whole point of this is - if you can't escape. maybe see how long you can just be. like. a horrible little menace.

#this is objectively bad advice #don't listen to it protect yourself and do real work on yourself find one of the good posts i've made about this #but also. u know. if u want to have fun while u do the work of setting boundaries #.... it IS fun #i will say that my fear of him went SO down after i just started. fucking with him. #bc i used to get SO fucking upset #i'd spend WEEKS arguing with him. tearing my hair out. sick with anxiety and dread and anger about all of it #and now i just LITERALLY do not engage #instead i'm like '' haha :) mole people" and get the HELL out of any tense conversation #i kind of think some of these people are literally addicted to drama as a form of connection #they like the rush they get from arguing #but those arguments are incredibly damaging for me #so like..... i am in the process of literally rehabilitating this person to figure out how to find connection thru #NORMAL CONVERSATION #he doesn't get it yet #i also do talk to them like they're preschool kids lmafo . ''are you using a safe and kind voice right now?'' #'' do you need a snackie? you sound a little upset. let's have some hummus and come back to playtime when we feel ready''