#dont @ me about his eye not working

[bluebirbbb]

little arthur malevolent lester portrait because my brain is full of him

#WHY DID NO ONE TELL ME I MISSPELLED ARTHUR (edited now) #I KNOW THAT'S AN ESSAY IN THE TAGS BUT I HAVE SO MANY THOUGHTS #i love him #i need to make him look more pathethic and sad next time #and more scrawny maybe #he's just too presentable #i dont have time for more art recently so have this at least as my little break from uni work #i actually like how it turned out tho #i need to paint more loosely like this in the future #also ive been staring at leyendecker when drawing this can you tell by the shading on the cheek #and yes he has white hairs!!!! #and eyebags and a little bit of wrinkles in the corners of his eyes #i need to draw it better next time but that's how i see the guy #i really want to draw his lighter too because i've been thinking too much about its design and also i want to render some objects #arthur lester #arthur malevolent #malevolent podcast #malevolent fanart #poor sad british man #myartstuff

[whenthelightisrunninglow]

another picture of this guy pointing at you 🔥💯 ten billion more on the way

#submas #pokemon #dont fucking LOOK at his coat i have no idea why i drew it like that but it's ok. we don't think about these things #i like sometimes when people draw his eye with like a super white pupil but i like. feel like it didn't work with me #but i tried to draw it like i normally do and it just looked weeiiirrddd #so idk 😔

[iwasbored777]

Trolls 3 spoilers

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*

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No bc Clay definitely has a crush on Viva it's just so obvious not Branch-being-madly-in-love-with-Poppy obvious but I could totally write an analysis on this. I want more of them, they didn't get enough screen time.

#i didn't realize how obvious it was until i rewatched the scenes with them and he clearly knows it but he knows she's not ready for a bf #so he's not doing anything about his crush it's there but i dont know about her feelings i just know about him #my brain isn't working right for me to write an analysis rn but i have eyes he's crushing #trolls 3 #trolls band together #trolls viva #trolls clay #viva #clay #cliva

[carnivalcarriondiscarded]

okay wait laughingstock concept Incoming: so im imagining some of the neighbors (maybe Julie & Frank) noticing that Barnaby & Howdy are a lil fruity, yk yk. and Julie's like damn, i guess we have to play matchmaker here.

so naturally they wind up getting the whole neighborhood involved. everybody's a wingman here. Poppy's dropping hints when Howdy drops off groceries, Wally is constantly asking Barnaby to go get him things from the bodega, etc etc. Howdy and Barnaby are facing this sudden change in town-wide behavior with slight concern and bemusement

eventually - lets say Julie, Sally, and Wally - get Barnaby into the bodega and then abruptly leave like "don't have too much fun without us you two *wink wink nudge nudge*". once they're gone (read: very obviously hiding outside & watching through the window) Barnaby & Howdy turn to each other like:

Barnaby: you think we should tell them we're already married?

Howdy: let them have their fun - they'll figure it out eventually

#dont have the mental fortitude to Draw This but i still wanted to share the thought #'but how would no one notice that theyre literally married' #easy: theyre very relaxed and secure in their relationship. also howdy has a strict 'no pda at work' rule #also because its funny. we can stretch rationality for the Bit cmon now #through the power of the bit Anything is possible #and we all know the neighbors are Peak Sillies so. yk #it strikes me that once they get Bored of the constant 'matchmaking' #barnaby and howdy stage this whole thing where they 'confess' to each other So dramatically and So publicly #they make it an Event #sally is swooning from the drama and spectacle of it all. wally is trying to paint the moment as fast as possible #julie is so excited she's close to passing out. eddie is crying. so is poppy. frank is taking the credit. home is just happy to be there #as soon as barnaby and howdy retreat out of sight they burst out laughing for a solid ten minutes #GAH THE BRAINROT THE BRAINROT #laughingstock #wailing and sobbing they are so so good together and FOR WHAT FUCKING REASON #i cant even put it into words they just Fit! like puzzle pieces! #theres something so natural about em. i look at them and its like. they Would be perfect for each other huh #i already know theyd have such a healthy wholesome relationship They Just Work. Theyre The Dream Couple #howdy says the most confusing sentence ever said. barnaby nods along with genuine love in his eyes. etc. you get it #now watch! canon is gonna absolutely set this on fire! #which would be Fun. painful. but Fun. seriously tho im curious as to how/if barnaby and howdy will interact/develop.... #i mean personally i love it when shit gets messy so i hope it Hurts So Bad or at least Goes Downhill #i hope its a rollercoaster on all accounts

[dmc5se]

it's you!

#my art #resident evil #leon scott kennedy #i keep seeing pics of 2leon next to 4leon and it kills me . #his eyes being so dull in 4r in comparison to how they are in 2r.... #hes so much more tired looking ....... ouh #i could genuinely write so much abt how his change in physical appearance hurts me . i think about it so much it hurts me #its just like..... if you start from 2r and then work your way up he just genuinely gets so much more tired looking ......... #and while he hasnt ever been like BEEFY beefy seeing how lean he is in smth like vendetta is like. it just hurts idk #but then you get to around death island and he's very.. playfully silly. i dont know how to describe the difference between him being silly #in vendetta vs in di but like. hes just SILLY in di. do you understand what i mean .. #his eyes are brighter. he's put muscle back on. he's silly. he seems happier. #especially in comparison to vendetta.. vendetta leon is genuinely so sad to me if i think abt him for too long i start crying LMFAO #anyway i've written enough . i need to stop. thank you for looking at this and for potentially reading all of this

[todayisafridaynight]

no ones ever gonna understand how much i love daigo doin this stupid shit after dissolving the tojo

#snap chats #is this a gaiden spoiler. its been like five months catch up you nerds #ANYWAYYYYY NOO I LOVE HIM ....... this whole bit is like four seconds long but i love it so much #i just reminded myself i should probably make gaiden/y8 videos for daigo.. i'll make it a JP/ENG comp or somethn.. one day #not soon tho like its barely anything since he's not in those games Long At All but still. im lazy 💀 #excuse me while i gush about daigo for twenty minutes now because hehee HE'S SO CUTE I CAN'T GET OVER IT #this is literally the middle aged equivalent of going yippee like YOU CAN TELL HE'S SO RELIEVED IT'S SO CUTE #got the energy of a student with crippling anxiety after they somehow get through giving a presentation without throwing up #AND his lil smile ......... thank you gaiden you made me wanna eat drywall with daigo's sad puppy dog eyes about kiryu #and then immediately made up for it a minute later #sorry i keep scrolling up to look at him and i love him so much. what if i threw up #i dont like using babygirl lightly but this is actually the most Babygirl frame of him ever ive decided #thats my boy .... i love my boy so much ..... he's so cute ... come so far in life congratulations king ..... ily ... #him lookin up at the sky for a minute just to breathe i know he thankin god for the fact he somehow isnt dead yet #im gonna ignore the fact all of this was for naught so i dont bash my head against a wall anyway stan daigo #im gonna be sick i love him so much #if i redraw this later shut up. i love him... #this is why i try not to look at cutscenes anymore cause when i do i feel my brain being put in a microwave and start to melt #its not my fault i love my guys so much .... ok bye i have work to do .... #and then when i finish that work i can go back to loving my guys YAAAAAY !!!!!!!

[foursidecity]

Having a passion for drawing comics and writing stories But only being good at writing prose is like. The worst kick in the gut ever ill have two characters in a room with 200 words of dialouge on their inner worlds that won't fit in a single panel let alone a page and the story will never progress because I can't get any dialouge out of them 🫡

#who wants to read a million page comic about some guy thinking his thoughts. anyone any takes (save me) #this is a slight exagerration but some characters are just so hard to write for #i tjink i over think it #i took show dont tell way too seriously as a kid #dustbunnies.txt #sits back and closes my eyes ok guys what would you say here (10000 page essay on a characters backstory) ok thanks guys great work youve #given me nothing

[iwanttorundirectlyintothesun]

okay so ik its probably just the lighting but his eyes are so brown‽‽

its honestly reminding me of college henry like

compared to the red i was expecting,,, screaming

#tgs #the glass scientists #im tagging this properly bc i wanna talk to people about this but my fam don't caree #im suffering #i should be doing uni work rn but this is more important #im mean .. look at him #like yes its the lighting but talking about how he feels like a new man #and then has lighter eyes im #like hen honey whats happening here #please figure it out and get back to me immediately #what else do people tag this as #henry jekyll #edward hyde #dude felt so many emotions at once that his body changed #sorry henry your normal body is just allergic to strong emotions atm #dr jekyll and mr hyde #thats probably enough right #?? #dont mind the use of the interrobang its my favourite punctuation mark and its cleaner than both exclamation and question marks #so i use it as much as possible

[opikiquu]

im going to be so annoying all week

#agghagahah HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH HYYESAAHHHH #★ arin rambles #BRO BRO PLEASLE #PELASE #my apology for everyone. I have to make it now . Sorry. If youre following me destroy that notif button you dont wanna hear how worse i will #get #actually no just Unfollow entirely #ITS THE ADHD #PLEASE. HE IS SO . COOL. his trailer is so awesome IVE REWATECHED IT 3 TIME SNOW. #I LOVE HIMMMMMMM SO MUCHHHHH #I LOVE HIM SO BAD I JUST ADORE HIM PLEASE #HES SO PRETTY. JAW DROPPING. ICONIC. LIFE CHANGING. THE TEARS IN MY EYES. GENUINELY SOBBING RITHT NOW IT S SO OVER #aventurine likers hold me. Nobody understands. Everyone is scared of me im too crazy #actually its everything wrong with me . Hes ruining my life #i dont struggle as an aventurine liker i actually excel at this its my full rime job now #‘9 to 5’ no i work 9 to 9. Every hour is dedicated to him #im glad uguys agree with me thannk uou i was starting to think i was a freak #Well i am but im glad someone else agrees hes cool #Hes so pretty im so happy #I CAMT WAIT RILL WENDENSDAY PLEASE IM GONNA FREAKIFN BLOW UP #I LOVE AVENTURINE. I LOVE AVETURINE. #i get so happy when i see him i get a little violent its unsettling . #like im like shaking my hands and jumping around my room and then u blink and im bashing my head against the floor #its carpet. Im ok. But like not but i am #DUDE. I LOVE. THIS GUY. EVERYTHING ABOUT HIM #i needto. Just. Okay brb gonna watch ir like 20 more times ill see u guys next year im going into a Aventurine induced coma #this makes me realize people read my tags. Oh dear. Sorry everypony #i apologize for my behavior. I will get so much scarier. #HES SO COOL. HES ACTYALLU SO COOL. LIKE HOW CAN SOMEBODY BE SO COOL. #oh god OH LORERDRDRDDDDDDD WHEN I GET YOU BOY WHEN I FIND YOU. WATCH OUT. WATCH OUT I WILL GET YOU.

[quietwingsinthesky]

Do you agree w/ the fandom interpretation that john was so homophobic he’d have beaten up and abandoned his sons for being gay? Cause sure, he grew up in the 60s as a mechanic and then later became a marine during the vietnam war, but i also don’t think homophobia would’ve necessarily been a priority for him? Like obviously he’s not gonna be the full on supportive and politically correct loving dad, but i think that the fandom’s general opinion on that is pretty warped by people’s relationships w/ their own fathers

I do think this is one place where people tend to project. I don’t think there’s anything wrong with that; working out our issues through fiction is healthy and good! I don’t think there’s any canon proof of it beyond, as you said, him being a marine from the sixties who would probably not be super knowledgeable about being queer, maybe a little apprehensive about it from what he’s absorbed through the culture he grew up in. I think we’d be correct to point out that if Sam or Dean were queer, he might be uncomfortable about it, he might try to avoid the topic, which is in of itself hurtful.

The thing about me is: I fully disagree that John was ever physically abusive towards his kids. At most, I will bend this interpretation to say he was probably too harsh on them while teaching them to fight and that maybe he and Sam have traded blows before when arguments got too loud (by blows, I mean, probably shoving with the yelling, you know, assertion of physical space. It seems realistic to me that two people who have been using violence for a long time to protect themselves, and for John, his family, down to the hierarchal power he’s put in place of him -> Dean -> Sam, would resort to it when things got too heated.)

(I also think that sometimes fandom’s insistence that John had to be physically abusive can sometimes get a little insulting because it perpetuates the idea that emotional abuse does less harm and can be overlooked and for flattening out John’s character in a way the show very literally pointed to and said He Did Not Do That. This is the entire point of Max’s episode in s1, for the show to point out that their experiences of abuse were different. How well it was handled is arguable, but I take it as clear evidence that when we talk about John’s relationship with his sons, the focus should be on the emotional abuse, the codependency he developed with Dean from a very young age, his neglect of them both, his attempts to suppress Sam, etc. And I appreciate this about the show, because you can’t talk about any of those things without also talking about why they’re happening, why John thinks this is necessary, how he loves his sons and isolates them to protect them and ends up doing more and more damage that will never leave them through their entire lives.

I’m sure there’s depictions of John being physically abusive that handle it with the same amount of nuance that the show handles him being emotionally abusive in canon. I have not seen them, unfortunately. I’ve seen John being physically abusive 90% of the time just being used as shorthand for him being Bad and Evil and A Terrible Father. Which does not interest me. So I will remain here as a staunch defender of He Would Not Fucking Hit His Kids.)

Sorry, okay, we got off topic there this is about gay shit.

The point of All Of That was for me to be able to say, John’s not going to react to his sons being queer by beating them. He’s definitely not going to abandon them. Hello? John Winchester? Abandon his kids? John Winchester, the guy who has been keeping them in warded up motel rooms their whole lives and moving them across the country out of paranoia the demon who killed his wife could find them if they say anywhere too long? John Winchester who only trusted one or two people to ever look after his sons when he went on a hunting trip too long? We think that John would ditch his kid because they’re queer???

Like I said, I think the most realistic reaction for John, (if not just flat out him going ‘that’s fine, now load this gun while I time you because that’s more important for me to know that you can do’, because. He kind of has bigger priorities to worry about here. Like werewolves.) would be discomfort and pushing it out of his view, ignoring it. Which would still fucking hurt! And would have horrible effects on Sam and Dean both, would encourage Dean to repress it if he thinks his dad is ashamed of him, would push Sam away if he trusts John with this fact about himself and can’t be accepted easily.

I just think this is truer to John’s character.

Anyway. If nothing else here persuades anyone reading that John Would Not Fucking Do That, well. He thought his kid was demonspawn, remember? He thought Sam was corrupted and might not be able to be saved. I don’t think you can get more clear queercoding than that, and you know what John’s very telling response was to that information, to finding out something a thousand times more terrifying than Sam being gay ever could be? To refuse to look at it. To insist to himself that whatever Hell wanted with Sam, he wouldn’t let it happen. To tell Dean to take care of it, because even when John is certain that his son might literally become a demon, he could never bring himself to pull the trigger on him. Because he loves Sam.

So like. He literally would not do anything for the much smaller realization that Sam is gay. His son has demon blood that might turn him super evil, and John still wouldn’t hurt him.

I guess what I’m trying to say here is, I try to keep the fact that John loved his sons at the forefront of my mind when I’m writing stuff about him, because I think if you let that slide out of your head, you can very easily make him much worse, much more flat than he was in canon. The real picture of him is just an extremely flawed man in a terrible situation who fucks up his kids as much as he protects them.

And also he wouldn’t care about them being gay because JohnAzazel real and true and they fucked sloppy in that hospital basement-

#this was so many words holy shit I did not need to ramble that much #but I did <3 #this is what u get when u send me an ask I have too many thoughts #john winchester #ask #spn #again reiterating that like. it is not a bad thing to work out ur issues through fiction. #hell knows I do. and hell knows I used to be a lot less kind to John BECAUSE daddy issues. so I get it. it’s literally fine. it’s fandom. #u are free to do whatever so long as you aren’t a dick to other people about the character they like that you dont #(…I am going to side eye you if you feel the need to insist john had to be physically abusive because he was just That Bad to his kids. #but that’s more like. ‘I think you might have some unexamined biases about the nuances of abuse.’ more than anything.) #tw abuse #re: John abandoning his kids: #I know Bad Boys(?) has John leaving dean at the boy’s home. uh. personally? #I think that’s just bad writing. I think they misunderstood John’s particular brand of weird relationship to dean. #I don’t tend to count that instance as canon or at least not in the way the show presented it. #but ur mileage obv may vary. it’s just my opinion that that was a later seasons fumble.

[takitori67]

Idk much about disorders and the likes (and everyone can absolutely correct me, pls) but Junao has something like amnesia, doesn't he. It's canon he wholly forgot Karna is his half-brother from Xmas event but also, like, what if he gets a spark of memories sometimes- occasionally. He could see a flash of something from just doing daily battles, from just hanging around, from just sleeping and dreaming, etc. and it always caught him off guard but the moment he consciously tried to grasp onto that snippet of memory it slipped away. Gone. And Junao once again didn't remember why he was shocked (and perhaps sad) in the first place

#im just having lunch and my mind does this #actually this has been in my head before. it was an old idea where junao caught a glimpse of memory about draupadi in his dream #but the moment he woke up he forgot entirely. and he wondered if something was wrong with his eyes (they teared up) #another idea is having a nightmare about his dead children #i have at least a dozen ideas i think. and i only got 1/5 done. pein #rambling and talking #oh another idea again: #junao: can you tell me their names? #arjuna: names? #junao: the names of ... your brothers #arjuna: oh #(jumps into a hole and buries myself alive) #i forgot quotation marks dont work again

[guinevereslancelot]

#my mom is fighting for this guy so bad but i think its unacceptable #she's saying that he has too many good qualities to end things over that but like to me basic manners is kind of a huge deal lol #i dont want to be with someone who makes me feel bas abt my appearance #he expressed disappointment that i had brown eyes as well and is always trying to get me not to wear my glasses #but he's really smart and we agree on big moral issues and he's working on his law degree #which is why my parents love him #anyway #i know this is the dump his ass website but i'm asking #should i just tell him it was hurtful and give him another chance? #we've been dating about three weeks btw

[carnivalcarriondiscarded]

the desire to do comms vs my inability to remember that i got a message FIGHT-

#its like 'oh a message! i will respond later' #and then later never comes cause i have no damn object permanence Or working memory #then its like... what do i even say #'hi sorry i ghosted your simple question for two days i forgot you messaged me' AGH #or especially lately #i mean to do things and then i get a New piece of distressing information about the way my life is going #which then consumes my thoughts and leaves no room for anything else #ahaha thanks! ill claw my eyes out now!! wow!!! FUCK! #trying to keep up the things i enjoy is. so tough rn #but ill flounder w/o em so! hard work that i am mostly failing at but i Keep Trying #yes i wanna do comms. yes i wanna draw. yes i wanna talk to people. can i? mmmmm...... #can't wait for this chapter in my life to be over. goddamn. #ive been in a perpetual state of intense stress since early childhood #but my fucking duck things lately have been taking the cake #absolutely unprompted #oh no this is turning into a vent post Look Away #well my mother called again last night and was all 'im getting you a car' #and uh. i started physically shaking while profusely thanking her (lying through me teeth) #GIRL!!! I DONT NEED A CAR THATS TOO MUCH RN!!! #she's always mentioning how the collective We are tight on money #and that rn i need to focus on making decisions and getting a job ill hold for like. a month #and then she slams this down outta left field??? thats so much extra stress i dont need right now??? #now i gotta worry about parking and maintaining it and gas money i dont have And And And- #i cant exactly tell her Dont Fucking Do That bc then she'll blow up in my face and call me inconsiderate & ungrateful again #me and my stepdad dont have the fucking TIME to get one! and then she was like 'oh i can always come down to help' #please dont. do not do that. i cant deal with you in person right now that sounds hellish #anyway. case in point #cant even think about messages and stuff i Want to think about bc all this bullshit is taking up my entire mind #metaphorically slamming my face into a brick wall till theres nothing left. aaaghhahsbkjadadj #its too much its Too Much everything is so much and its too much and can i be let be for two fuckin seconds please

[seaweedstarshine]

You know that time in the comics when the Doctor is so depressed, he shuts off the lights, turns on an interrogation spotlight, locks himself in the console room, and argues with a bunch of judgmental shadow-figures resembling his past incarnations?

And all the TARDIS' lights go out and her interior becomes a maze to keep his companions out of the console room, all from her psychic connection with the Doctor (“moodbleed”)?

And his companions are left wandering in circles for two days as the air goes “stale,” not knowing where he is but thinking the worst, while he hallucinates in a dark room?

...because I'm thinking again about the times this definitely happened when he was with the Ponds.

#when they find him- Rory (one good nurse™) asks neutral questions to check on his emotional state while respecting his space #Amy knows when he's locked himself alone long enough to call River (fortunately Amy talks to her daughter often) #River can calm the tardis and go directly to the Doctor. she sits with him and nods when he rants. she tells him hes loved. #eleventh doctor #11th doctor #doctor who #words by seaweed #(eleventh) doctor is neurodivergent tag #honestly same. I don't want anyone looking at me when im in that way because eyes are very uncomfortable lasers slicing my thoughts #so river doesn't look at him. she looks away and lets him look at her so he knows she's not looking at him. she also does active listening #the shadow-figures in this comic are beyond psychosis coded #emphasis: it isnt presented like some conference of past selves here (which the doctor can't just do anyway- see Power of the Doctor). #and the shadow figures dont have personalities anyway. the way theyre drawn is VERY psychosis coded (as is 11 this whole Si Spurrier run) #this is from Eleventh Doctor Year 2 Issue 3 (set between A Christmas Carol and The Impossible Astronaut) if anyone's wondering #note that he put on his comfort fez I love him #alice obiefune #poor Alice got drove up the wall from wandering in the dark for two days… I think Amy and Rory get to get used to it if they're together #eventually they work out a plan to calm the tardis enough to show them the comfy spot in the bunkbeds to wait and give him space #he joins them in their bunkbed for platonic snuggles. all in the same bunk. Rory doesnt mind. they make sure the doctor knows hes loved <3 #I think- having been percieved as psychotic growing up- Amy would be conscious about making sure the doctor knows she still adores him #I really want this fic to exist

[nandermoenthusiast]

oh my god i got so emotional SHUT UUUUUP

#911 #911verse #evan buckley #so this is what crying about a character is actually like #like i do be crying at times dont get me wrong #but i just love buck so much. i kept stopping the episode and going. omg omg omg #omg its happening. omg idk if i can actually watch this. omg its happening !!!!!!!!!!! #jesus christ JESUS CHRIST #like i know we throw the word around a lot but this is MY SON #and everything that happened in the episode. it was like it was happening to me #i felt actual physical damage and actual butterflies as the kiss moment approached #like theY DID THAT #THEY MADE MY BI SON CANONICALLY BI #idk to have this shift in a characters perception this late in a procedural….. 911 you gods #i really hope they can somehow make more seasons cause they would deserve ti #it. and like. this doesn’t have to be the end of buddie?? #they could get them together at any time bc buck realizing hes into men is a lot other worm can than buck realizing hes in love with #his best friend. i just dont know how they would do it with eddie bc they would have to pull a lot of focus over there too with a big #chance of feeling repetitive with their narratives #maybe they just show them together after a timejump and say they worked some stuff out idk lmao #ANYWAY I AM STILL CRYING BECAUSE BUCK MY SON IS A CANONICAL BISEXUAL JEALOUS DISASTER JUST LIKE HIS MAMA ❤️ #THIS IS WHAT REPRESENTATION IS ACTUALLY ALL ABOUT (and i mean his horrifying handling of the feelings of being left out of course lmao) #THE LOOK EDDIE SHOT HIM TOO #i am too frazzled rn i just need to scream i think #hi. im sorry this is me coming out of the 911 closet now that wwdits is on hiatus #evan buckley!!!!! #SON OF MY SONS #LIGHT OF MY LIFE #APPLE OF MY EYE

[frecklystars]

nightmares have rendered me unable to sleep once again so i've been dancing in my room to Elvis music pretending K is dancing w/ me for the past 45 minutes. I think it'd be his way of trying to make me feel better. he isn't very experienced with comforting others but he hears me gasp awake, hears me crying. he knows the drill by now. he immediately gets up. takes my hands and pulls me out of bed. asks me if i want to talk about it, and if i don't, he turns on some music and swirls us around. he mimics elvis' voice while singing to the songs, knowing it'll make me laugh. when i finally do, he's smiling, saying very gently "there you are, sweetheart... there's my girl"

#its funny he doesnt even listen to elvis in his downtime in canon and he's become synonymous w/ his music in my mind #im so tempted to draw him in a black leather jacket and me in a poodle skirt #sharing a milkshake at the diner. OH GOD WAIT i want to draw me and Driver doing that #i need my F/Os more than ever rn it's gonna be uh. a difficult day bc i gotta work soon #and im running on VERY little sleep 😭 #i didnt sleep for 60 hours straight and then i only slept for 2 hours just now and i jolted awake #and i cant sleep again ;~; #but thank god i have ryan F/Os to think about when i jolt awake now #my dolls or my posters being the first thing i see when i wake up scared. is comforting #every tme i blink my eyes burn but it feels better knowing Driver would understand... or Six would get it bc he has c-ptsd too #i need them to hug me so tight. augh. hell on earth i wanna sleep so bad #IM FINE i dont mean to complain. well yes i do. im running on such little sleep my thoughts are all over the place #woof #love notes #💕♬♪ ♡ I can't help falling in love with you ☆- ̗̀💛 ̖́-☆ #vent #I GUESS?