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sapphicmsmarvel · 4 years

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Feysand: Punching Bags

Modern Feysand AU

Feyre breaks up with her abusive boyfriend and goes to a boxing gym to work out aggression. She meets the trainer Cassian who then realizes, hey, you’d like my brother.

Also: “Hey kiss me, my ex is here.”

All of the bat boys are actual brothers and Mor is all their cousins.

No azriel and mor love story for that reason.

and can we talk about how i got this idea from talking to my therapist

Stupid dick.

Those were my only thoughts as I got out of my car to go into the boxing studio.

Work out your aggression, Alis, my therapist, said to me. You went through an abusive relationship, Feyre. It’ll help get that resentment out.

I sighed again, pulling on the door handle, I could practically smell the sweat. The place was called Blood Rite. Nesta and Elain grimaced at the name after I told them where I was going. There was another thing that caused aggression; judgement from my sisters.

There were two black haired tan men at the counter, one had shaggy hair that didn’t go past his ears. The other had long hair that was pulled into a bun. I walked up to the counter, the bun-man greeted me, “hi, welcome to Blood Rite, how can I help you?” “Hi, I spoke with someone on the phone that said I could just….come in and punch?”

He smiled, Jesus he was pretty. “Yeah, just a 50 dollar fee and you can punch till your heart's content.”

“Thank you,” I paid, I was about to go to the locker rooms when he called out.

“Miss? We always ask names here, I’m Cassian, this is Azriel.” The shaggy haired one smiled and waved.

“I’m Feyre.”

“Nice to meet you, Feyre.” I smiled in response. and went to the locker room with my bag. I wasn’t used to smiling at males again, Tamlin didn’t like it and I didn’t want to get hit. I sighed in frustration, I know I couldn’t have left in that situation. But it was still frustrating. I threw my bag into a locker, slid my phone into my leggings pocket and plugged in the headphones.

I wrapped my hands and began punching, I punched before Tamlin, it was one of those things he “didn’t like me doing”. At first, I didn’t notice the controlling aspects. He blamed it on his ex, Ianthe or whatever.

Punch. Punch. Punch.

I didn’t wear the right clothes, I ate too much, I didn’t eat the right foods, I didn’t smile enough, I was too nice, too flirty.

Why was I not good enough for that piece of shit? What did I do? What did I do to make him so fucking angry that he hit every goddamn day of our relationship?

Every cell of my body was on fire with different emotions, my hands felt numb, it wasn’t because of how much I punched, it was because of the anxiety coursing through my veins. My legs were itching to have kicked him in the balls, at least once.

I could still feel his hands on me, how he’d grab my shoulders and yank me back to him if I walked away. How every time he was behind me, every hair on my body stood up.

Someone touched my shoulder.

Without thinking I spun around and punched them in the face. Then I saw the tan skin and long black hair, Cassian fell to the ground groaning. I ripped my earbuds out of my ears, “oh my god, I’m so sorry!” He groaned, “fucking hell, you throw a punch.” “I’m sorry,” I winced, I offered up a hand to help him up, he grabbed my hand. “Oh thank god it’s not bleeding,” I said.

“It’s alright.” He said, “but damn you throw a good punch.”

I winced again, he continued, “but I was telling you, we’re closing.”

My cheeks went crimson, “aw shit, what a way to end your night.”

He shrugged and smiled, “no problem, but I can tell you’re going through some shit, there’s a great place down the road, you seem like you need a friend.”

This dude would totally be a serial killer. “Sure,” I said, “What’s the name, I could meet you there?” Eh, what else did I have to lose? I was living in my sister's basement.

“Great, there’s this place called Rita’s down the road, I’ll be there in ten, I have to close down the computers and turn on the whole security protocol.”

I nodded, “okay, see you there.” I ran off to go get my bag, I went to my car and hoped to god that I didn’t get killed tonight.

------------------------------------

Rita’s was a bar. I quickly looked up their menu on my phone, Cassian said he’d be here in ten because all he had to do was close down the computers because Azriel took care of the money.

Ugh, they had truffle fries, what a blessing.

I saw him walk up to the doors and wait, I looked at the clock, he was right on time. I swallowed down the bundle of nerves, what if Tamlin showed? My stomach fell to my ass.

I swallowed my fear and met him at the door, he offered me his arm, and I took it, smiling. We went and sat at a table, a waitress came, we ordered.

He sighed and looked at me kindly. “So, you want me to ask the hard question or the easy ones?”

“Give me an example of both.”

“Easy: what’s your favorite color?” not red, “Hard: what made you so angry that you punched me that hard?” He asked, concerned.

My stomach sank, “blue.” I answered the first one.

He nodded, “Mines red, favorite food?”

“Truffle fries.” I said, “Chicken wings. This place has the best truffle fries.” He said wistfully.

“Yeah, I saw their menu online, definitely going to enjoy those. So do you own the gym?”

“I run it with my brothers, Azriel and Rhysand.”

“Ah.” I said, awkwardly closing the conversation.

It was awkward now, making friends was never my strong suit, it was Elains.

“You should really talk about what’s bothering you.” He said gently, I nodded, “no judgement?”

“Nope. But you’re so much like my brother, not talking about shit, afraid of being a burden.”

I huffed a laugh, “wow, you really attacked me with that one.”

“Hey, I know shit. So tell me.”

So I did, I spilled my guts to a complete stranger, I told him everything. From Tamlin and I meeting, first date, first signs of abuse. Everything. He held my hand.

I made a friend.

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A few more months went by, Cassian and I had a routine of me going to the studio every Monday, Wednesday and Friday night. Cas staying an hour after hours for us to talk, work out, whatever and then getting food after.

But tonight was different. Cassian invited me out with his friends, who apparently have been dying to meet me after accidentally giving him a black eye. Azriel and him talked me up, I have never met Rhysand, he only came in on weekends and weekends were the days I dedicated to myself.

But I’ve heard the other regular girls gush about him.

I wore skin tight black jeans, black shirt with no sleeves that was skin tight and had a cut out by my breasts. If I lifted my arms, the shirt exposed my midriff. Tamlin had forbidden this shirt, so I felt it was needed to break it out again. My muscles from working out and punching shit showed off quite nicely and I had heeled black boots.

I shoved my phone in my pocket, grabbed my leather jacket and headed out. I thought I had managed to avoid my sisters’ gazes but nope, Nesta is like a hawk.

“Where the hell are you going looking like that?”

“Out.” I said as I grabbed my keys.

“Feyre.”

“Nesta.” I said, warning in my voice as I turned around to face her. I wouldn’t be backing down, I will never back down again.

Elain turned the corner, her eyes widening at my outfit, “where are you going?”

“She says she’s going ‘out’.” Nesta said.

Elain hummed, “well, have fun Fey.” She smiled, a genuine, real smile, grabbed her hot chocolate and left the room.

I looked at Nesta with a ‘ha’ expression and opened the door to the garage, but not before I heard her go, “be safe.” I sighed as the door shut, if I went back in, it’d kill Nesta’s pride, me knowing that she cares. I brushed it off, I was going to have fun tonight with friends. Well, friends of a friend.

Good enough for me.

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Rita’s was packed, I tapped my fingers on the steering wheel in anxiety, okay I got this.

I pulled out my phone to text Cassian, I’m here.

Three dots popped up, fuck yeah, i’m on my way to the parking lot.

I smiled and got out, it was warm for March but the sun was gone so it was chilly again. Clutching my jacket closer to my body, I walked to the doors.

I ignored the creeps outside, Cassian came out and greeted me with a hug, “heya Feyre.” He waggled his eyebrows at the rhyme.

I rolled my eyes, “that was awful.”

“Get used to it, the group is ready with stories and puns for you.”

“Is it too late for me to leave?” I joked as he pulled me into the building.

“Yup, you’re stuck with me and now them.”

My heart warmed at being accepted so quickly, Lucien didn’t accept me quickly. My heart then cooled at the thought of him. I missed him.

“What’re you thinking about?” He said as we walked to the back of the club. “It’s just...been awhile since I’ve been out like this.” I shrugged.

He nodded and squeezed my hand in comfort.

We found the group in the back, well, I’m assuming they’re the group based on the fact that Azriel is there too. When he saw me he smiled (which was rare and I was so happy to see it), he got out of the giant booth to hug me, which again, surprised me but I was glad for it.

“Everybody, this is Feyre.” I waved awkwardly as both brothers had their arms around me.

“I’m Morrigan,” said the beautiful blonde.

“Amren.” The other woman said, she was beautifully terrifying,

“And I’m Rhysand.” Said the most beautiful man I’ve ever seen. He had the most beautiful eyes, Jesus christ. Were they violet?

I knew there was good genes in that family (hello look at Cassian and Azriel) but fucking hell. I smiled at all of them, don’t be an idiot, Feyre

Cassian let me slide in on the left side first of the u shaped booth, then he slid in after me. I was right next to Morrigan who hugged me, “I’m so glad to finally meet you!” She squealed.

“I can’t believe you punched Cassian.” Rhysand laughed downing his whiskey.

“She’s working on her anger management.” Cassian joked.

“Watch it, I can punch you again. And this time, it’ll be on purpose.” I gave him a look that had him howling.

The others started laughing which eased the knot that was formed in my belly. Morrigan began telling more stupid stories about Cassian. Turns out they were cousins, Jesus everyone is related except Amren.

Eventually, Cassian and Morrigan worked together to drag Amren and Azriel out onto the dance floor.

“I can’t believe we kept missing each other.” Rhysand said.

“I know,”

“Was it worth the wait?”

I pretended to think about it, “hmm, I finally met the great Rhysand and he doesn’t ask me to dance? Not really.” Okay, I need to stop drinking.

But he smiled, those violet eyes twinkling. “I guess that means I can’t disappoint.” He got up and offered me his hand, I smiled and took it.

He led me onto the dance floor, “just an fyi, I haven’t danced on the club floor in about three years.” I warned. Another thing Tamlin ruined for me.

“Well, then, let’s dust off those moves!” Last Friday Night by Katy Perry started playing.

I nearly rolled my eyes but then Rhysand started twirling me around, I started laughing. He then did some weird disco which nearly killed me. He pulled me into his arms, him and I danced together, his hands on my swaying hips, it felt freeing. We kept laughing and I felt light.

Haven’t felt this in years.

I saw a flash of familiar bronze hair, my stomach sank, it was Lucien. ANd next to him, Tamlin. Motherfucker. I quickly turned into Rhysand who noticed immediately, “what?” He whispered.

“Keep dancing,” I said breathlessly, “him and his friend are over at the bar.”

“Who?”

“My ex. Blond and redhead guys, blond is my ex.”

“The ex?” He referenced, Cassian told me that Rhysand had asked about my story, and he told it with my permission.

“Yes.” I said, nerves fluttering in my stomach.

“Hey, hey, hey, it’s okay. But they’re looking.”

“Fuck. Kiss me, please?” “Darling, you don't have to ask. Been thinking about it all night.” I turned my head, he went down and met me. This kiss was seering. My fingers wove themselves into his hair, my fingernails scraped his scalp and he groaned into my mouth. His hands slid up my waist, he gently squeezed my mid riffe, his fingers cold against my hot skin.

We pulled away, he checked, “they’re gone.” I smiled, “thank you.”

“Anytime.” He smiled back.

The group found us, it was obvious we had kissed, both our lips were swollen, his hair was a mess thanks to me, and his hands were still on my wrist.

They were about to say something, when Juice by Lizzo started playing. Cassian shouted and dragged me to go dance with him, I grabbed Rhys, who grabbed Az, who grabbed Mor and she grabbed Amren. All of us ended up in a dance circle just being idiots.

Mor and I duetted the bridge of the song, “somebody come get this man, I think he got lost in my dms!”

“What!”

“My dms!”

“What!”

“You better come get your man, I think he wanna be way more than friends!”

“What!”

“More than friends!”

We danced a few more hours away, when the others got tired, but I didn’t wanna go home. It was 2 in the morning but I felt alive. Rhysand and I went down to a diner, the others were ready to throw in their dancing shoes but since I wanted to stay out; which never happened, Rhysand stayed out with me. I didn’t have to worry about coming home to an angry man who would beat me.

I felt so free.

We pulled up to a 90s themed diner, the car ride wasn’t awkward but it wasn’t at ease, that kiss loomed over us.

“I’m sorry about that kiss,” I said, once we were seated, my conscious just wouldn’t let me wait till later.

“It’s okay,” he smiled. “I didn’t mind it.”

I smiled. The waitress came over and we both ordered milkshakes. “I craved milkshakes like crazy whenever I went out.” I said.

“When was the last time you went out like this?”

I sighed, trying not to let the smile slip, “three years. But hey, I made some pretty amazing friends tonight, and I met you.” Vodka makes me ballsy, never again.

“I’m different from a friend?” He asked, smiling.

I nodded, “I don't kiss my friends.” Not like that, at least.

“So is this a date?” He asked, quirking his eyebrow.

I nodded, “I think so.”

“Thank God, cause seriously, you’re beautiful.” He said, “and I’m a lucky man.”

I smiled, little did I know, this was the beginning of the rest of my life.

#acotar #acomaf #acowar #acofas #cassian #azriel #morrigan #amren #feyre archeron #rhysand #feysand #elain archeron #nesta archeron

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fuzzbuttsquawksalot · 7 years

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Filling in the blanks - Mystic Messenger Reader Insert Part 02

Tags: again A LOT of sexual tension & fluff (ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ*:･ﾟ✧

Pairing: Zen x Reader / Zen x MC

Tagging: @katieuwu , @itishebihime-samaforyou

It was early in the afternoon on a Saturday, you still enjoyed the comfort and warmth of your bed. Unfortunately, your stomach made its presence felt and started to growl. But there was something else that made itself felt and disturbed your slumber. Slowly, very slowly it dawned you what the hard thing that decided to poke your back was. Your eyes flashed widely open. You gathered your thoughts. What had happened yesterday? Right, you weren’t alone.

Cautiously you turned in the embrace of the man next to you. His respiration was even, you took the chance to observe him closely. He had a satisfied smile on his lips. Beautiful white hair was framing his delicate and yet manly face. You distinctly felt the defined muscles of his chest through his black shirt. If it wouldn’t have been for his little or as you noted not so little friend, which was now poking your thighs, you would have believed that he was a divine being. Your stomach started to do flip-flops, you didn’t want to ruin this peaceful moment, which engraved itself deeply into your memories. But. You. Simply. Had. To. Touch. Him.

Gently you caressed his cheek, ran your fingers through his silky hair and settled on fondling him behind his ear. Your heart skipped a beat as his crimson eyes fluttered open and stared at you in a flash of shock. Where was he? A few seconds later, after you retreated your hand his gaze went soft.

“Thank you for the compliment,” you giggled and confused him greatly. What compliment? He knitted his brows. With flushed cheeks, you bit on your bottom lip and looked downside. Oh, ohoh? OH! That was what you meant. His face went nearly as red as his eyes.

“I, uh, oh, I’m sorry!” he stuttered and facepalmed. You laughed heartily as you stood up.

“Haha, don’t apologize for something like this. I mean, it’s only natural. You’re a healthy young man and I gladly take the compliment.” You grinned broadly at him, showing your teeth. Zen watched you through his finger, suddenly catching the view of your verrrrry short hotpants.

Oh god, you must be doing this on purpose. What a sweet torture you were. Maybe it’s for the best to stay a little longer under the blanket.

You opened your fridge and bent down to examine its contents closer. A few water bottles and beer cans, some sauces, a dubious yogurt, you couldn't remember when you bought it.

You tossed one of the water bottles over to Zen ”Uhm, you’re still free today?” He nodded and urgently swallowed some of the cold water. “My fridge is empty as it can get, but maybe you would like to grab something to eat with me. Maybe...,” you checked the watch,” linner?” and tilted your head innocently to the side.

“Sure. I’d love that,” Zen growled with his rough morning voice, which made your neck hair raise. Does he know how he makes you feel? You fanned some air with your hand to your face.

“But, uhm, I feel a bit sticky. So I’ll take a shower, ok?” you said.

“Uh, oh, mh,” since when was it this difficult to express himself with words. The imagination of you in the shower flashed before his eyes. No, he shouldn’t be here when you take a shower, “I’ll head home and take a quick shower too. I’ll be back in like forty minutes, okay?”

“Kol (Korean for deal),” you said and vanished with a smile to your bathroom.

As soon as Zen heard the water start, he did his best to dress as quickly as possible and leave your apartment. Or he could just ask if you would mind sharing the shower with him. For environmental reasons of course. No, that would be a bad idea. You haven’t even kissed. What if you would think he’s some kind of pervert. Well, you are, told him his inner beast. No, definitely he needed to leave.

Your heart pumped faster than after a marathon when you heard the faint click of your front door. What did you expect? Would it have been ok, if he had followed you to the bathroom? You didn’t lock it though. Wildly you scrubbed the shampoo into your hair, getting some of it in your eyes. “Whaaaaaaa,” you groaned in agony. What exactly were you thinking?

Like promised, you just had finished applying some makeup and drying your hair, you heard him knocking on your door.

“Come in, it’s open,” you yelled from behind your room divider, not sure which outfit to pick.

“You shouldn’t leave your door so carelessly open,” he said with a slightly bitter undertone.

“Nah, I only left it open, because I knew you were coming.” you had decided on a simple white blouse and buttoned it up.

“Still,” he protested. You took a peek and saw him wear his black leather jacket, greyish jeans and with a helmet under his arm. Given these circumstances, you also chose a pair of jeans for down below.

“Alright, let me get my keys and wallet and I’m all set. I see, you’ve got something in mind?” you said while binding your shoelaces.

“Yeah, I thought we could take a ride, grab something to eat at a convenience store near a park and have picknick.”

“Sounds like a good plan,” you patted his shoulder, stood up on tiptoes and gave him a peck on his cheek. Surprised by your all too casual behavior he blushed. But he could get used to such signs of affection. “What about the other side,” he joked brazenly and got another peck from you. He wouldn’t have hoped for seconds, but seemingly he was allowed to ask for this much of skinship. It made him extremely happy and he couldn’t help but grin like a doofus. Or was this your normal demeanor? You wouldn’t behave like this with just anyone, right? He didn’t know what exactly caused it, but he came to the conclusion that after yesterday he must be somewhat special for you.

“Are you coming or what?” you teased leaning on the doorframe of your entrance door. Secretly, it made you happy that simple actions like this made him happy.

It was a nice and warm but not too warm day in autumn. After buying a rather healthy take-out, consisting of a fresh salad with kimbab rolls and green tea you went to the park alongside the Hangang river. Riding on his motorcycle had its downsides, you were a bit afraid, you didn't trust something so fast without much safety measures. But there certainly was the upside of hugging Zen from behind and clinging to him so hard that you could feel his muscular body. It was a good thing he couldn't see your flushed face.

Once you had parked and found a nice place for your picnic blanket, it didn't take long until you noticed a group of women blandly staring at you both. Or more like shooting lovesick glances at Zen and virtually killing you with their gaze.

“Uhm, maybe we should go somewhere else,” you said and gestured in the direction of these hyenas.

“Oh don't mind them,” Zen answered.

“But I kinda do…,” you told him. Those hateful glares were really irritating.

Zen put his palm on the back of your hand. “Don't take it to heart, they can't help themselves. Who can resist my god given beauty?”

You rolled your eyes, as kind as Zen was, his narcissistic side was sometimes too much to take. Moreover, you had the hunch it was only a facade to cover deeper lying issues.

“They must be fans,” he went on and waved towards them. Luckily they were surprised by his actions and made no amends of coming closer. You didn't know why but suddenly you got a bad feeling in your guts, your jaw dropped. You simply had to ask:” Don't tell me you've ever slept with one of your fans?”

“I would never do that…,” Zen said and continued while avoiding your eyes “ again”.

Oh god, why couldn’t he lie just like any normal person? But he hated lying and hiding something from you felt terribly wrong. But the look you gave him, a mixture of shock and loathing let him feel extremely guilty. He needed to explain himself, ”Listen, it’s not like that…”.

You cut in, “I think I get it,” with a bitter undertone. Why was this date - was this even a date? - suddenly going downhill? Your heart stung, you clenched up. Why did it hurt? You tried to mentally calm yourself down. Zen was a friend, admittedly a very good looking friend, but it had nothing to do with you what he did in his past. It was silly of you to believe a man, who looked like him wouldn’t be a womanizer.

Zen saw your sad eyes and nearly panicked. If he couldn’t clear this situation right here and now, he might not have had a chance with you ever again.

“No, you don’t,” he sputtered “I did some things in the past I’m not proud of. I guess, saying I was young and stupid sounds like a lame excuse, but I was. But I swear, I’m not like that!”

Desperately he leaned a bit closer and whispered with highly red cheeks “I, uh, I haven’t had sex in over two years.”

Dang, you felt cheap. Why were you prejudiced? True, you hated men, who played with women like toys. But you should have known better than this. Not once did Zen give rise to accuse him as a man slut. You sighed deeply, “I’m sorry, -uh, not for you not having you know what, well a bit, two years is a long time, but I mean, I’m sorry for overreacting and making you confess something like this. I won’t tell anybody.” Could it get any more embarrassing? Both of you had flushed cheeks, you fake coughed and looked away to gather your thoughts.

“Anyways, do you mind, if I do something to stop those irritating eyebeams from your so-called fans?” you asked quietly and stood up while patting nonexistent dust from your jeans.

“If you must,” the young actor answered, a bit nervous about what you would say to his alleged fans.

“But, uhm, could you close your eyes? I don’t want you to get the wrong idea…,” you ask shyly.

What would you do? You wouldn’t cause a scene? Would you? Only yesterday he had witnessed that you weren’t as composed as he thought you would be. However, he decided to trust you and closed his eyes diligently.

Seconds later, he felt a warm presence in front of his face. Before he could guess what it was, you surprised him with your soft lips on his. Like an animal on all fourth, you had positioned yourself on the blanket to reach him. It was meant to be a short kiss, your personal way of apologizing. But as soon as Zen knew what was going on, he cupped your cheeks with his big hands and deepened the kiss. After a bit teasing and sucking on your lips, you opened them and let him in. He was a good kisser, he took his time to explore your mouth and to dance with your tongue. Only when you got dizzy and desperately needed some air you broke the kiss and opened your eyes. You could hear a soft moan from him. His flustered gaze, his taste, the little noises he made, they were intoxicating.

You had to dive back in for seconds. Your instincts kicked in, you nestled yourself against Zen, nearly pushed him flat down the ground. Kissing alone was all at once not enough. His soft whimpers and deep groans were too inviting. You showered his delicate neck with a mixture of bites and kisses. His hair smelled fresh from the Dove shampoo he used. You let your hand slide down his side, pulled his shirt up a little and went under the material. Naturally, your other hand began playing with the hem of his boxers, stopped at his belt.

“Honey,” he said in a hushed tone whilst gently gripping your arm and halting you.

Your eyes went wide. Shit! Shitty shit shit Mc Shittens! What exactly were you about to do, in a public park? You had been too deep in the zone.

“Honey, your phone is ringing for a while now, ”he said still out of breath.

Quickly you sat up straight and put your phone to your ear.

“Yes, hello, who’s there?” In haste, you hadn’t looked at the caller's number.

“MC, are you occupied? I could call you later if you’re busy,” said a dark and calm voice.

“Ah, Jumin, it’s you.” You turned away from Zen, but not without seeing him flinch as he heard Jumin’s name. “No, it’s alright, to what do I owe the honor of this call?”

“Are you sure, you’re ok?” he asked a bit worried.

“It’s ok, I’m ok - I went to a park and the scenery was so beautiful, I nearly forgot the time. I didn’t even hear the phone ringing.”

“I could send Driver Kim to…”

“No, I assure you, I’m fine. But thank you for your concerns. So what did you want to talk to me about?” you said and brushed a strand of hair behind your ears

“Have you thought about the job offer I made you yesterday? I know it’s a bit sudden, but my father decided to take most of the people of the legal department with him on a business trip and we’re a bit short. Would you mind starting tomorrow?”

“Jumin, you know that tomorrow is Sunday, right?”

“Yes, I’m quite aware. But I would like Jaehee to show you around and explain you a few things before Monday. Working this Sunday is an exemption. I promise.” Poor Jaehee you thought to yourself, she will be less than thrilled having to work on the weekend.

“Then I gladly take your offer. But what about my application documents? Should I bring them with me?”

“No need. Luciel already told me what I need to know. You’re more than qualified and C&R will be lucky to have you,” he said unfazed. Huh? 707 must have hacked you after you met all of the RFA members and he wasn’t blocked by Ray anymore. You weren’t sure if you liked this invasion in your privacy but in the end, there was nothing you could do. You can’t pick up water once it’s spilled.

“Alright, when and where should I meet you tomorrow? In business attire I assume?”

“Is there another? I’ll send Driver Kim to pick you up at eight in the morning.”

“Do you need my address?”

“No. Luciel, …” he started, but you interrupted.

“I see. Then I guess I see you tomorrow Jumin. Or do you want me to call you Mr. Han?”

“Please don’t. Mr. Han is my father. See you tomorrow.”

“Goodbye Jumin,” you said and finally ended the call. As you turned back, you saw a slightly sulking Zen.

“Beautiful scenery… I sure am,” he smirked and made you flush. Right, if you remembered correctly, you were in the middle of something. You gazed over Zen’s shoulder into the distance. At least, your plan had worked. No sight of the hyenas from before. You sighed and folded your hands in your lap.

“So what did this jerk want? Aigoo, he certainly knows how to ruin a moment. He and his cat. Only thinking about him makes my nose itch. He’s meeting you tomorrow?” Zen growled.

“Yes, I took his work offer and apparently Jaehee has to break me in on her free Sunday. She won’t like this news, haha. But can you believe it? Not once he had mentioned Elizabeth the third,” you said.

“He’s such a slave driver,” He hissed and you both had to chuckle. For a long moment, you both stared at each other. You could see a mixture of want, need, but also embarrassment and insecurity in his face. He really was wearing his feelings on his sleeve. With such a variety of visible emotions, it must have been forgone for Zen to become an actor.

“You’re quite something,” he joked and broke the silence. But then his mien went serious. “Mind if I ask you something?”

You shook your head. “Not at all, ask away.”

“What are we? I mean you and me. What is this?” He pointed from him to you and back a few times.

“Hm, I wonder?” You teased him. “No, kidding aside, that’s not easy to answer.” You literally saw his heart sinking. Therefore, you scooted closer, took one of his big hands between your palms and caressed it. “You know, my irrational side is obviously attracted to you. I’m this close from pinning you down on the ground and getting rid of all your clothes, no matter where we are and who could see us.” Zen gulped and blushed to the roots of his hair. “But,” you went on with another sigh “But, my rational side tells me, if I want to make this work, I have to get to know you better. I don’t want to risk complicating things with the other RFA members if it turns out that we don’t fit together. I don’t want to lose you as a friend. And I don’t want you to break my heart.”

“I would never…,” he said. You placed his hand on your chest over your heart. You were sure he felt your quick heartbeat.

“I’m sure you’re not intending to. But there are so many circumstances, which are beyond of our control and can lead to a broken heart nevertheless,” you smiled sadly.

“I understand,” he placed one of your hands on his chest likewise. His body warmth and fast heartbeat descended to your fingers.

“Hyun, I would like to get to know you better if that’s ok with you?” you asked.

“I also would like to get to know you better,” he smiled back.

You kissed him on his lips, then his cheek and then straight under his ear on his neck.

“Darn it, it’s really hard for me not to lose my control with you and to give in to my irrational side,” you whispered, indulging yourself with his sent. The gorgeous white-haired actor hugged you and placed his chin on your shoulder. “I know exactly what you mean. I call my irrational self ‘the inner beast’.”

You giggled “That’s a well-fitting euphemism, mind if I use it?”

________________________________________________________

Notes: Not edited, contact me if you find some errors ! Still no smut, but I didn’t want to rush this couple and I promise, we get there in part 03

#mystic messenger #mystic messenger reader insert #mystic messenger fanfic #RFA #zen fanfiction #zen x reader #zen x mc #zen #another story #v route #hyun ryu

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dialogfetzen · 7 years

Text

“I should've taken my jacket with me” Kihyun mumbles to distract himself from his own nervousness as he roams alone through the chilly night, heading into unfamiliar territory.

With every step he takes, his heart starts beating faster and Kihyun can't get rid of the thought that maybe his heart is saying 'yes, this is the direction you're supposed to go', picking up its pace the closer he gets to his destination.

Or at least that's what Kihyun wants to think, grabbing for every straw of hope that he is doing the right thing here.

That he isn't just opening old wounds to let them bleed again for nothing.

He walks past old warehouses and factories that were barely more than ugly eyesores in the landscape, wondering what their purpose was before they were cut off the electricity system from one day to the other, just like everything else outside the capital.

Kihyun very vividly remembers that night.

They had spent it like nearly every night, feeling muzzy from various kinds of incense in the air of the greenhouse, drunk on whispered promises, heated kissing and other things left unsaid – when the lights suddenly turned out.

At first they didn't mind, embracing the dark, making it part of their ritual - until they realized that it wasn't just their greenhouse.

Through the plastic sheets they could see how the lights of the town slowly disappeared, one after another.

It had felt like the darkness had swallowed up every life and they were the only ones left in this world.

Kihyun will never forget how good he felt that night.

Nor would he forget the harsh days that followed when it hit them hard what it meant to live without any resources from the capital.

Kihyun stops as he takes a deep, shaky breath, his muscles tensing as he recognizes the unmistakeable sign that he was at the right place.

Even in the middle of the night it was hard to miss that huge, black and all too familiar X that was spread across the building that was something between a tiny warehouse and a huge shed.

He probably should laugh at how much the other clung to their past while most of them decided to bury and forget about it, but all he feels is relief that the other didn't live as horrible as he had feared over the last few years.

Even with broken windows that were poorly repaired with thin plywood, rather ugly attempts at graffiti covering the walls (some of them already withered under the sun, others very recently added) and a roof that probably barely kept most of the rain outside, it was still a solid place to live in.

For a moment Kihyun considers if he should go back again.

He made sure that the other was okay and by dropping his backpack in front of the door, the other would know that he was doing fine as well. A sign that they still coexist in this world without having to interfere, just like the way he communicates with Jooheon.

A gift here, a sign there. Sometimes Jooheon leaves traces of how Minhyuk, Hyungwon and Shownu were doing while Kihyun gives hints about Changkyuns well-being.

That way they didn't have to deal with the, most of the time, very dubious things they did to survive.

PANG

Kihyun winces, startled at the loud noise.

PANG PANG

His heart picks up its pace again, his hands shaking.

That loud noise origins from inside in a steady rhythm and Kihyun feels hot and cold at the same time.

He's here.

Knowing that he was actually inside, just separated from him by a too thin wall, made it all too real. He couldn't turn back now, not when he knew that he was that close.

“Calm down Kihyun” he whispers to himself as he reaches for the door handle, trying to gather his courage to enter. What could possibly go wrong?

His mind immediately is flooded with all kinds of scenarios that indeed weren't worth the risk, but before he could make up his mind and flee, his hand just opens the door.

Hot, stuffy air hits him as he enters, filled with the scent of something burning, the loud sound of metallic pounding ringing even louder in his ears. It's barely brighter than outside, but still bright enough to find his path through the many shelves that are lined up like a hallway, the flickering light of a fire casting orange shadows onto the floor.

He tries to take a peek through the shelves, trying to see where that loud noise comes from, but they're packed with all kind of stuff. Cables, tools, screws, light bulbs in all sizes, boxes filled with plastic...somethings Kihyun didn't know the name of.

He stops at the end of the shadows, hesitating.

To his left the line of shelves ends, leading him into the area the sound and the fire come from. His grip on his backpack straps tightens.

What was his plan now?

'Hi, it's me'?

Or should he pretend to be all rough and tough now, just throwing the backpack in his direction as a greeting? He starts to sweat, his nervousness adding to the heat. “What should I do?” he mumbles to himself and suddenly it's quiet.

Kihyun holds his breath, waiting. He can't hear anything besides the crackling of the fire and his own heartbeat.

After something that felt like years and a sudden moment of bravery, he can't take it anymore and steps into the light.

Kihyun doesn't know what he had expected, but this was far away from it.

Focused on some paper, surrounded by all kinds of tools, Wonho stood there.

Topless.

A thick leather apron was barely covering his chest, the holes in his tight black jeans showing unnecessarily much skin on all the right places.

This was ridiculous!

Kihyun was unable to move, wondering if he was still conscious or having a weird, but not entirely unpleasant dream.

The light of the fire defined Wonhos muscles in the most advantageous way, his skin gleaming with sweat as he turned his bare back to Kihyun to get something from one of the shelves, making him feel all sorts of things.

He would lie if he said that Wonho hasn't been attractive before, he wasn't blind, but this was on a completely different level, blacksmithing fantasies he never knew he needed aside.

As Wonho turns around to go back to his work, his eyes finally meet Kihyuns.

His mind goes blank immediately, all the things he planned to say forgotten. All he gets out is a shy, hoarse “You changed your hair”.

He painfully closes his eyes at his own words, running his fingers through his hair. This wasn't the start of their reunion he hoped for.

Luckily Wonho seems to be too busy to process all the emotions that are crushing down on him, and Kihyun feels endlessly relieved that the other hasn't changed too much. He was still as easy to read as a book. He could see that the other was seriously surprised, could see how anger flared up, suddenly turning into sadness and, finally, a smile as bright as the sun appears on his lips.

“Your hair changed too” Wonho replied and Kihyun suddenly feels like a heavy burden was taken off his shoulders.

Finally regaining the strength to move, he steps closer, heart beating hard in his chest. Why hasn't he tried to look for Wonho all the time before? Why did he waste nearly three years without him?

“What are you doing here?” Wonho asks, his voice filled with happiness as he reaches for Kihyuns hands, who interlaces their fingers without even thinking.

“I ...” Kihyun can't help but laugh, embarrassed about himself. “I stumbled upon a few still edible packages of Ramyeon and couldn't stop thinking about giving them to you.”

“Really?!” Wonho asks and pulls Kihyun into a hug, laughing out of pure joy.

Kihyuns heart grows at least two sizes bigger at that sound. God, how he had missed him!

***

They sat down on some wood pallets, Wonho clearly enjoying his Ramyeon while catching up on the events they missed the last years.

It felt good to talk with someone who was as close to him as Wonho. Even as a grown up, Kiyhun strongly believed that the bond of their clan was one of the strongest, even when things didn't work out the way they planned.

“Are you and Changkyun still...?”

Kihyun looks at Wonho, startled. Was he that obvious?

He sighs with a sad smile on his face. “No. We broke up soon after everyone left.”

Kihyun throws some wood he ripped off the palette into the fire, staring into the flames.

“Somehow we don't work as a duo. We still... we still love each other but it's just... complicated.

He thinks I baby him because I am worried and want to protect him all the time... what I probably do... and I feel often lonely even when he's by my side because I can't relax. I don't know. It was easier with you by our side somehow.”

Kihyun shrugs and looks up again. “Sorry, this is probably way more than you wanted to know.”

Wonho shakes his head, swallowing his noodles.

“No no, it's okay. It sounds like it was hard for you too. I envied you every now and then because I thought you'd have it easier because you still have each other. I know, that's dumb because it was my own decision to leave, but well.” He smiles weakly, remembering the fights they had before their group fell apart.

“Did you ever consider coming back?” Kihyun asks after a few moments of silence while Wonho seems to consider if he should open his second cup of Ramyeon or save it for later.

“I won't lie, I considered it quite often because I missed you too, of course I did, but I was scared.”

Wonho smiles embarrassed.

“Guess I was lucky that I'm really better off here now since I got that power generator to work, which basically makes me irreplaceable. I not only have the knowledge but also the resources for the job I learned. Had to fight a lot for that.”

“Is that why you beefed up so much? From fighting?”

“Beefed up?” Wonho asks, not able to hold his laughter while rubbing his arms, suddenly feeling exposed. Kihyun just snorts at that, hasn't forgotten they way he looked like before he put on a not less distracting white shirt. Not that he could ever forget.

“You haven't told me what you guys are doing, except, well, 'doing fine'.”

Kihyun considers for a moment if he should continue to change the topic whenever it goes into this direction or simply lie, but decides against it. He wants to be honest with Wonho.

“We're doing deliveries. Any kind of delivery. You get the idea of how we make our money I guess.

Mostly me though, I … I prefer to keep him away from our clients.” Kihyun quickly adds, avoiding Wonhos gaze.

The older one just stretches his arms, picks up his still closed cup of Ramyeon and considers once again what to do with it.

“Must be nice to have someone who you can share your work with. You know, I have all this simple work to do, all on my own. I also miss Changkyun very much.”

Wonho pretends read the ingredients of his Ramyeon while talking, but Kihyun is well aware that he is waiting for him to get the hint.

But Kihyun doesn't want to make promises yet.

He had missed Wonho so horribly much, regretting that he hadn't done this earlier and he surely trusted him, but it was still too early for this.

“While we're already talking about work...” Kihyun sighs, suddenly realizing how tired he was. “I have to go home. I still have a lot to do.”

“No!” Wonho gets up, seriously upset, a pout on his face. “You can sleep here until the sun rises?”

Kihyun shakes his head with a smile and gets up. “I will come back soon with more Ramyeon, okay?”

“You don't have to. As long as you don't bring trouble, my door is open for you!”

He didn't want to leave either, but knowing that he could come back anytime and that he was more than welcome made it easier to say goodbye.

“No trouble? So I shouldn't bring Changkyun along?” he asks teasingly before he grabs Wonhos neck and pulls him down to kiss his hair without thinking. It came to him natural, like they haven't been separated for years.

“I seriously missed you so much.” he murmurs into Wonhos hair, refusing to let go. “We both did and I'm so sorry that we left you alone for such a long time. I would've understood if you would've been mad at me for turning up here after all that time. Our ways didn't separate in the best way.” he adds while running his fingers through the blond-blue hair. “But I will make up for that time somehow, I swear.”

Wonho keeps unusual quiet, head still down. It takes Kihyun a moment to realize what's going on.

“Oh no, no no no, don't cry! Hey, I said I'd come back, didn't I?”

Wonho nods, raising his head again. “I know. It was, just, ...” He takes a deep breath, looking up at the ceiling to stop his tears from falling. “For a moment it felt like nothing ever changed, and it just felt so good, you know?”

Kihyun just nods, keeping his mouth shut. He feels how hot tears start to sting his eyes, but he forbids them to fall.

So he just gives Wonho a quick peck on the lips and squeezes softly his hand.

“Changkyun is probably already dying to see you, even though I haven't told him yet that I was going to visit you. You won't have to wait too long for us.” he assures Wonho one last time before he grabs his now empty backpack and leaves.

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