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#i dont get Good Things and nothing i do is good enough
suempu · 2 days
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Looooving the Laios content!!!! If you have any nsfw headcanons for him we would love to hear those too👀
<3 i tried to keep it as gn as possible. reader is on the receiving end
laios wouldn’t really be interested in sexual things unless you ask him about it.
getting intimate with him would have to happen at random or unplanned.
he’s really just content with kissing and hugging you, he’s never once thought of sex. one kiss is enough to get him so high and happy.
please makeout with this man, it gets him going. he loves your lips, the way you hum into his mouth, and the gentle caresses you leave on his arm while you do.
your first makeout session gets him hard. normally, you two only exchange sweet kisses and touches, so he was shocked when you decided to crawl over his lap to hold his face better.
his mind explodes from there.
he’s a whimperer, please guys agree with me on this. a lot of quiet gasps and surprised voice cracks are gonna come out of him.
“mmf… nghh… mMph-!”
he loves it when you tug on his hair, when your fingers dig into his roots and firmly pulling it back while you grind down at him.
laios likes putting his hands around your body, he embraces you while moaning into your mouth, eager for more of your taste.
dont get me started with the whole “taste” thing.
this man loves to eat, we all know that. but he loves to eat you.
the first time is awkward, as he’s not sure where he’s allowed to touch you and he’s quite hesitant.
“i just… don’t wanna make you uncomfortable.”
“laios, i’ll tell you if i don’t like it, okay?
you’re both learning each other’s bodies, and after much reassurance he leans in and nips at your neck.
he’s a… mouthy person. loves sucking on your skin, biting your ear (gently of course), moaning into your shoulder. one thing he loves to do, which isn’t inherently sexual, is to wrap his arms around you while nosing and kissing the skin between your jaw to your shoulder.
he trails his lips all over you, making you giggle and moan at the same time. he just likes feeling you out tbh
laios is def girthy, nothing extreme, just a bit thicker than you’d realize. he’s kind of shy at first, no one has ever seen him like this so he doesn’t know if he’s considered “sexy” or attractive
until now, he paid no mind to his body, didn’t care if people found him hot or anything, but he’s suddenly embarrassed when its you.
“i-is it good enough…?”
“you’re literally bigger than 4 of my fingers combined.”
but yes, please praise this man. tell him you love him and that he’s beautiful.
laios eats up the praise, he has a dopey smile on his face and a blush on his cheeks. he loves knowing that he can satisfy you, it makes him feel fulfilled.
once you actually get to it, his body was trembling from the heat and warmth. he moans shakily while nuzzling his face into your hair, murmuring about how good you feel and how much he loves you.
he’s really loud. he’ll moan in your ear with no hesitation and you tease him about it afterwards.
aftercare with him is comfy and cozy. you both are spent as you cuddle into each other, basking in the afterglow.
he has such a loving gaze, he looks so much like a big puppy that it makes your heart melt.
“that… was really good.” he sighs, lips nuzzled into your hair. pulling back from his chest, you rub his cheeks as you relax into the pillows, staring up at him with a smug face. “i can tell. with the way you came after 10 seconds.”
“please don’t.” he groans.
don’t worry, after a few times he will memorize all the sensitive spots in your body and get you to cum a thousand more.
laios has good stamina and he can go for at least 2 or 3 more rounds. if you’re too tired, he’ll use his remaining energy to carry you to the bathroom and wash you both off.
will unintentionally get hard while he’s cleaning you, so please forgive him for that. he’s just really attracted to you lmao
“next time maybe you can try pulling my hair.” you lean back against his chest in the tub. “or maybe a tug?”
“i don’t know… i wouldn’t wanna accidentally hurt you.”
“……”
“…”
“laios are you hard right now?”
“i’m sorry.”
after that, you both will have a relaxing routine of drying each other’s hair and brushing your teeth before sleeping.
laios is eager to learn more about your body and he’s genuinely excited to figure out what gets you going. 100/10 lover, he can’t wait to go again.
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atlasnessie · 1 day
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hii i saw ur requests were open and i decided to make one :3, how the bsd men would act when they are lovesick? Like not yandere and those twisted things, but they just feel like a teenager boy in highschool with their first love, nothing else than pure fluff =w=" i honestly dont care which characters you add, but id really like to see fyodor in there ;P.
Bonus points if the reader is just so gentle, kind and pure with everyone ૮ ˶ᵔ ᵕ ᵔ˶ ა!! You can ignore this request, take your time. I hope you have a good day and thanks for reading me :DD
GOD, IM SO LOVESICK. WHAT HAVE YOU DONE TO ME ?
osamu and chuuya slowly realizing that they’re in love with you.
an: FINALLY FINISHED THIS OMG anon im so sorry it took so long also i’m … still unsure of how to write fyodor ughh ikk embarrassing !! hope this is okay nonnie :((
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OSAMU DAZAI never had the chance of falling in love. everything ended one sided, a side that would benefit him and him only. he’s lived long enough to know that he was not worthy of such a delicate feeling; everything he has and wishes to have will all disintegrate as soon as he has it. dazai was not willing to risk it. not now, not ever.
at least, that’s what he wants to believe.
dazai can’t shake off this feeling when being around with you. he stands by the roadside of the sidewalk when walking with you, voluntarily giving his coat when the weather gets chilly, and surprisingly have enough money to buy you some good coffee (and not put it on a tab). he doesn’t know why he’s doing this, it’s not like he’s into you, but his thoughts wander off to wanting to feel your hands on his, to know how his first name would sound from your lips instead of his surname. and once he realizes he’s in love, he’s gone.
lovesick isn’t something dazai had ever felt. romance and osamu dazai should never be in the same sentence, they don’t belong together.
“you’ve been avoiding my texts, my calls, and now ignoring my knocks on your door ?” you stand in front of the paint chipping door, a bento in one hand and a finger pointing at his chest with the other. dazai looked terrible, his eye bags more apparent and the stench of alcohol from inside could make a lightweight drunk at the smell.
“ah, whatever do you mean —”
“you know what i mean, dazai. i’ve gotten calls from kunikida telling me that you haven’t shown up to work for a week ! he can’t even enter your apartment and he calls you every morning to check that you’re okay.”
you pushed your way inside his apartment before he could speak. this wasn’t the first time you’ve been in here, and was definitely not your second. or third. or fourth, or fifth, or however amount of times you’ve been here. dazai can’t remember.
placing the bento down on the cheap wooden table, the color of the lunch box was the only bright thing in the whole house. dazai quickly closed the door, almost tripping on your shoes before speed walking behind you. if he’d known you’d come in, in which he probably did, he would’ve cleaned and tided up a little beforehand. your eyes darted around the room before unboxing the bento.
“sit down. i made you something to eat.” your voice was quiet, but a little higher than a whisper. the aroma of fresh, real food made dazai’s mouth water.
“at your command, then.” dazai responded back, pulling a creaky chair and sitting, his eyes shining dull as he heard the sound of wooden chopsticks break.
“here, you eat. i’ll clean.”
“awh, i was hoping you’d feed me.” chocolate brown eyes met with yours, faking tears to brim out of his eyes as he lazily held the chopsticks, holding it as if he had never seen them before. an excuse. this was an excuse. not for you to feed him, though, he’d most certainly love that, but for you to not clean up the mess he had made. the cluster of sake bottles and canned crab made his apartment look less pleasing to look at.
“eat. i’ll clean.” your voice was persistent as you pushed the bento closer to him. grumbling, dazai pick up an egg roll and inspected it. how stupid, he thought. a toothpick shaped as a cat stood idle in the middle of the roll, its dark void eyes staring at his. it looks a lot like you, naive and ever so …
shit. thoughts like this shouldn’t be running in his head. you’re just a co-worker, afterall. right ? though … dazai has to admit; the food that’s on the bento tastes better than anything ever, and the soft hum of your voice lulls his worries away.
to be loved is to be known, he thinks.
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CHUUYA NAKAHARA has no time for feelings outside of the port mafia, but you’re an exception. the sun sets slowly on the horizon of yokohama, and the wind is just right for a nice breeze. the picnic cloth is laid on the ground as chuuya swirls his glass of wine, watching as you talk about your day. you weren’t anything special, hell, it was total coincidence that you two even met.
a civilian and an executive of the port mafia. what a story to tell. but you weren’t aware of chuuyas profession, no, why would he break the trust that built up and took so long to gain ? he wouldn’t dare, he couldn’t.
“and then, while i was walking home today, i bumped into some guy and he was all like, ‘double suicide’ this and ‘double suicide’ that. scared the hell out of me ..!” you laugh and take a sip of your own wine and out of the corner of your eyes, you can see chuuyas shoulders tense up.
“he didn’t … he didn’t have some weirdass bandages all over … did he ?” chuuya grumbled as he pressed the wine glass to his lips, hiding his irritation.
“oh, he did. it was really weird.”
fuck ..!! chuuya though, grinding his teeth together just at the thought of that disgusting man. his thoughts of killing dazai were interrupted as you point at the sky.
“look, isn’t it pretty ?” you sigh, placing your hands behind you and leaning back. the sky was painted a radiant orange, complemented by pink and yellow. chuuya blinks and stares into the horizon, the corner of his eyes shifting back to you subtly. his chest tightens and—
oh, how he’s smitten. maybe it’s the wine, maybe it’s the gentle rays of the sun, but his face feels hot and he leans closer to you, bringing up a hand and tucking in longer strands of hair behind your ear. you turn your head as chuuya stops midway, your hair falling out of his fingers. leaning back, chuuya coughs and plays it off, pouring himself another drink.
“sorry. looked like it was bothering you.” he mumbled, biting the rim of his glass before taking a sip, his gaze avoiding yours.
it’s the little things, but to him, he wants to do more than subtle hints of love. this is a start, at least.
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Just remembered the fallen god reader thingy- what if reader just one day regains their power ;)) and then just leaves them, I'm like super offended ;(( I dont wanna be mistreated by them
ahaha this ask made me chuckle a little! unfortunately my version of yandere archons aren't sweet in every scenario, i do still hope you enjoy though! :D
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Warning: this post contains yandere-themes, including mentions of being held against ones will, mentions of manipulation, mentions of violence, and other potential topics. Please read at your own risk!
Venti:
Well, he certainly can’t just let you leave, not after all that hard work he put into nursing you back to health. No no, don’t you see, you owe him. You could try and claim he was doing it out of the goodness of his heart, I mean he’s an Archon, a god just like you, doesn’t he see how unjust it is to demand payment?
You could beg and plead all you want, but unless your powers are enough to break the elemental barriers he’s set up, then I’m afraid you’re trapped. He won’t mistreat you, he’ll be nice and sweet to you so long as you behave, but your freedom will forever be removed.
“It’s not fair you say? A lot of things in this world aren’t fair, it’s just how it is.” His bright smile and humorous laugh do little to settle your unrest. No matter how hard you begged, how fast the tears poured from your eyes, or how strained your voice became from constant pleading, nothing worked. Perhaps if you learned to behave he’d let you see the sun again, until then, think long and well about all he had done for you. Remember exactly just how much you owe him for the things he’s done for you.
Zhongli:
He finds it curious that your powers have suddenly returned, but it does little to change his authority over you. Regardless of the strength you show or possess, Zhongli has ingrained into your mind just how weak and pathetic you are. You are nothing without him, your silly little powers mean nothing if you aren’t here with him. Can’t you see that? Can’t you see that you need him?
There’s little that would change about the dynamic between the two of you, if anything it just gives Zhongli an excuse to be around you more. His eyes seem to always be observing you now, watching keenly to ensure you don’t dare step out of line. There will be consequences if you should try.
“Dinner is done, come eat.” His tone is warm, but there’s a familiar sense of sternness in the undertone. Since the resurgence of your powers, Zhongli had made sure to remind you of your place below him. It didn’t matter how hard you fought, the elder god showed little remorse when overpowering you. It was astounding to think that even after the loss of his gnosis he could still hold such power over you, but then again, Morax wasn’t known as the God of War for nothing.
Raiden:
She doesn’t believe you at first, those who lose their divinity are not simply granted it back. It would take a long while and many displays of your capabilities to convince her. It doesn’t much change her opinion of you though. Raiden still thinks you are foolish and weak to have lost your powers to begin with. And for that, you should suffer the consequences.
Every escape attempt or effort put in to fight back is quickly shut down. She doesn’t even let you build up the hope that you’ll be able to land a hit before she’s got you disarmed, pinned, and once more shown your place beneath her. It gets a bit frustrating, having to always correct your silly outburst.
“When will you learn that you are nothing compared to me? You should be grateful I have enough decency to put up with this behavior, if you were anyone else I’d have tossed you to the streets like the pathetic waste you seem keen on acting like.” Her words are as rough and painful as her hold on you is. She has you under her, pinned to the floor in the living room of her home. It’s an embarrassing sight, your face held down to the hardwood as she scolds you like a child. This wasn’t the first time it had happened, but Raiden had hoped that by now you’d have learned your lesson. She is getting incredibly fed up with you.
Furina:
Your return of power puts her in a tough position because before when you were powerless, she had something to hold over your head. Now, you hold the power and she’s left to flounder.
There isn’t much she can do to keep you from leaving, sobbing on her knees as you walk towards the front door. It wasn’t fair, it wasn't fair that you got to get back what you lost, it wasn’t fair that you got to still be connected to divinity when she was cut entirely from it. 
“Please, please don’t leave me…” Furina kneels on the ground, hands balled into fists as she begs and sobs. She can just barely see the sides of your shoes as you walk past, disregarding her as you head for the front door. When she’s sure you’re not looking she ceases her crying, the tears were fake from the start. Reaching for the pipe she hid under the couch, she silently grabs it before standing. It was easier to hit you, having stopped in the doorway to admire your freedom, you had been too caught up to hear the soft patter of her footsteps behind you.
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crybabycrry · 8 hours
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photo booth with ellie ᡣ𐭩
warnings: nothing but fluff & some kissing<3 and that’s it:3
note: i was at the mall yesterday with @tatestitties and we accidentally sheared a kiss in the photo booth totally by accident? and it gave me the idea to write this lol i was a little drunk when i wrote it so it might not make any sense. NOT PROOFREAD
daily click. dont buy tlou. read this. and this. help palestine
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you had dragged ellie to the mall because you need to do some shopping. you had already went to a few stores and now walking to yet another one with 3 bags in ellie’s hands.
ellie enjoyed tagging along with you because she loved to see you get all happy when she said that she wanted to come with you, and it also ment that ellie would get to see you in all these clothes you decided to try on. and damn you always looked so fucking good in literally everything you tried on.
and also ellie LOVES to buy you new things. it brought ellie even more joy to see you happy, and ellie loves to smother you with gifts and new things.
as you were walking out of a store from the corner of your eye you spotted a photo booth. “omg ellie look” you pointed to the booth. “what?” she asked in confusion because she could not tell as to what you were pointing to.
“the photo booth,” you told her. “wanna go get some pictures?”
“uhh dah, is that even a question” you giggle slightly at her response. now dragging her by the arm towards the booth.
౨ৎ
“did you put enough coins in?” you ask.
for some reason the photo booth was not working. ellie had put in the right amount of money in and pressed all the button and still, nothing is working. “i don’t know why it’s not working”
as you and ellie were about to get out a voice started coming from the big screen before the two of you says something, about pressing this button to take your photos. and as soon as this very robotic voice hit your ear you both looked at each other and smiled from joy.
you and ellie took your seats in the booth and ellie pressed the big red button right in front of her. the machine gave you a three second warning before each photo.
for the first picture out of four you and ellie tuned to the side with your backs touch and looking right into the camera smiling and doing whatever you want with your faces.
for the second picture you laid your head onto ellie’s shoulder and she laid hers on top of yours and you gave the camera some duck lips.
for the third photo you and ellie wanted to be a little cute and silly so you made some funny faces.
and for your fourth and final photo ellie took you by surprise by grabbing you and pulling you in for a long and passionate kiss. you almost didn’t have to to close your eyes for the photo, but in the very last second you shut them close and tangled your fingers in ellie’s loose bun.
even after the machine had told you to get out, ellie was still holding you tight and moving her lips slowly against yours.
you really didn’t want to pull away for this kiss but you also kinda need to breathe, so you tap ellie on the thigh to signal her to pull away:(
you and ellie got out of the photo booth, both you and ellie a little dizzy from from the delicious, yummy, tasty kiss you had just sheared. ellie’s hand reached into the little thingy(wtv it’s called) and she got out the photos you had just taken.
a bright rosey blush spread all across ellie’s face and a smile that she quite literally could not keep off of her face. you looked down at the pictures in ellie’s hand and then at her face seeing how flustered she looked. you place a kiss to her cheek.
“your so cute when your flustered like that”<3
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luvring · 2 days
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hello!! hi. i hope you are not too busy. i have been enjoying your 'falling in love' hcs for the ts characters, and i was wondering if i could ask for the same concept with kuras? if possible? please take your time with it. ^_^ i thinjk he would be silly with it but would also want to biblically smite the reader with his mind (/affectionate) . or you two are psychoanalyzing each other from opposite sides of the room FAR away from each other. I Dont Know. packingf my suitcase and leaving
KURAS FALLING IN LOVE
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gn!reader | didn't realize how poor a read i have on his possible plot until writing this. my bad. good job red spring studio U and ur mysteries and kuras's identity in the overarching lore got me this time...
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this is going to be the most normal start of a relationship of the LIs. like he's just ('just') a doctor. you're about to strangers -> friends this through coffee and chatting
kuras doesn't...seek you out? not at first. that's not to say he isn't interested by you, but he has a job (and secrets) to handle. but he welcomes your visits as long as he has a break!
it starts with offering to grab or buy something, then staying and helping, learning about a random medicine he has on the counter, and then you're a semi-regular presence at the clinic, and you know which cabinets to check for the average sickness/bandaging. his practiced smile turns into a genuine one when you come through the door. he's asking how your trip was, catching you up on what's been happening lately
one moment i feel might happen is you finding yourself in his clinic, needing his help again,, hopefully your clothes are in tact this time. he jokes about how he'd rather not see you on the cot if you wanted to visit again.
little pranks...!! the senobium or him. roleplaying to throw guards off your trail y'know. getting to see that playful side of him :3
if it's him, he pranks you back, shooting you the same 'innocent' smile he does the guards. be careful about spilling that ink. you've been misplacing papers and pens all day too, haven't you? are you feeling alright?
another moment is. it's hard to say what, but you unknowingly say something tied to his situation. you casually drop your opinion on guilt and atonement—smth smth how guilt will rot and your atonement will never end if you don't let it smth smth the evil that others do with your kindness does not corrupt you smth smth—and it gets him.. Thinking. ! maybe you find those stories about a teacher and harbinger of chaos, and after bringing it up to kuras, he asks you for your opinion on them.
!! one moment i hope we get is kuras 'letting loose' or being silly. laughing really loud and apologizing as it lessens to a chuckle. trying to eat food because you don't know he doesn't eat, and it goes terribly wrong so he gives up and lets you laugh at him
LOL the psychoanalyzing. you say something and he has a weird reaction like Hm. sure, of course. and you're like ??? and he tells you it's nothing, just that that makes sense for you. and you're like Woah you wanna talk about My observations about You? and kuras looks at you like [ !! ] [ ?! ]
there's also small things that suddenly feel more intimate—him cleaning up a wound on your face and holding eye contact, his fingers lingering as they brush your cheek. you instinctively reaching for him when someone bumps into you, and him making sure you're alright.
kuras starts taking more initiative by inviting you to join him places and talking about himself. (cue joke about how information is power and him saying he'll make an exception for you.)
but it won't be all sunshine and rainbows considering he's an incredibly old angel and he has. shit going on.... who knows what shit honestly
you notice how he still doesn't share everything, which is fair enough—you're not spilling your entire life story either. but you still don't know basic things about this guy, you don't even know how he's kept his clothes clean all this time or how Old he is
that distance kuras keeps between you grows again because he doesn't want you to get in harm's way, and it's inevitable if you stick too close. he's an expert at dodging questions, answering just enough to keep people satisfied, but what does this mean for you? someone he's unexpectedly grown fond of, and who keeps calling him out for it?
you voice what you're both thinking. he has a frustrated expression when you point out you both like each other, and you want to help him for once, because ??!! he doesn't know what to do here.
something something, kuras's true form, him invalidating all the good he's done for the chaos and ruin he's brought, the world before, being the one to help him find forgiveness, the divine as neither good nor bad, kuras defining himself outside of a teacher and sinner Something Somethigngggaaghhh
Honestly. i've been messing with both ideas in my head and i haven't picked one i enjoy more so.
there's kuras, who's never been in love and is suddenly fumbling for once, trying really hard to 'do it right' and figuring out what it means to be in a relationship and in love (he's overthinking) (he was doing alright) (he asks ais/mhin for their opinions)
and then there's kuras who goes with what he was doing before, just with more affection/intimacy, because seriously he was already doing a great job at being a good partner :sob:
i think kuras's feelings are a slow burn themself. like, he takes the time to get to know you, to open up, etc, and he wouldn't define what he feels as 'being in love' for a while ?? he knows you're incredible important to him, and know him better than...probably anyone else. but he thinks "i love you" is a very significant thing to think and say out loud and he wants to make sure he knows for sure.
if you wait for him to say it first, i think he'd make it a really special moment! ^^ he thinks for a while about how to do it and, maybe uncharacteristically, gets nervous. his face lights up in its own way when you say it back (not a huge face-splitting grin, but his smile does grow and it's obvious he's relieved/happy)
it isn't often that the doctor is thrown off his game, especially not for longer than a few minutes, so if you ever casually, and Very Quickly*, say "love you" while you're leaving, it's a Sight to See. imagining ais coming to see him and going ...?? when kuras opens the wrong cabinet for the most basic medicine. he applauds your work the next time you see him
*very quickly because if you're in a situation where you're alone and he isn't needed, he's going to stop you?? like what?? can we have a conversation about this (not mad just stunned and values communication and also in love with you and)
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elftwink · 2 days
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got a text from my coworker apologizing that she accidentally outed me to another coworker and i am not sure how to respond because on the one hand theres not really a safety issue and if there is fallout im pretty sure its handlable and the most likely outcome is literally nothing happens. like one of our other coworkers is openly nonbinary so this is not a stealth-necessary work environment and i have often considered coming out to coworkers with the main reason i havent being because i dont want to put the effort in to talk to everyone LOL. and the coworker who outed me is a pretty good friend and i know it was an accident and she feels bad so like i dont really want her to beat herself up about it or for it to reflect badly on our relationship
but on the other hand im not sure how to convey that without saying something like "no worries" or "you're fine" or otherwise minimizing what she did, which i dont want to do because despite there not being a safety issue it is kind of upsetting and nerve wracking. like i just dont have control over a situation where i previously did have control & there isnt a way to put that back the way it was. and i don't know exactly what our other coworker has been told either, or how he reacted, or anything really, so i just sort of have to wait until sunday to see if he says anything or treats me differently (the latter of which i think is extremely likely; not that he'll be directly bigoted, but ive talked to this coworker about trans stuff before and the conversations have been... ill informed and very exhausting. usually i just try to end them as fast as possible because i dont get paid enough to have a difficult conversation with someone who knows nothing but thinks they are an expert, especially when i am the only one of us with any personal experience).
she already feels bad and i dont want to make her feel worse (she's my friend!), but i also don't like being put in the position where i have to comfort her about the thing that she did to me. i know this isn't what she intended like i firmly believe this is a good faith apology, i just dont know how to respond to it in a way that doesn't involve saying it's okay. and i don't want to say it's okay because it really is not okay.
(the other thing also, which just has to do with the general atmosphere of transphobia and not my coworkers apology, is i find that i am usually expected to say everythings fine when something transphobic happens to me, lest i be painted as the evil and unreasonable transgendered who isnt willing to let people make mistakes and rules my tyrannical pronoun kingdom with an iron fist. or whatever. i dont think my coworker would react this way, but years and years of people misgendering/outing/saying transphobic things and then crying to me as though they're the victim and reacting extremely negatively if i did not dry their tears and reassure them that They're A Good Person, Really... it weighs on you. there's an unspoken expectation that you will be endlessly tolerant and forgiving, and an accompanying resentment or anger if you don't fulfill that expectation. even when people aren't getting angry at you, you still flinch from the times people were, and you still try to temper your reaction based on the possibility they will react badly. difficult to have honest and genuine conversations in that environment!)
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ganondoodle · 8 months
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i often really do feel like an .. unwanted part of the fandom, i dont draw beautiful landscapes, i have unpopular but strong opinions im constantly annoying about and rarely change, dont like/dont draw the pretty young popular twinks and hot gurls to fanboi over nor do i turn characters into one, the opposite moreso, draw only one ship no ones heard of really, got little energy to interact with the few people that are nice to me and send me asks so it probably looks like im ignoring everyone and unfortunately but still rarely get so stressed i get overwhelmed and emotional about pehaps seemingly minor things and spiral almost into a breakdown feeling super embarrassed about it afterwards but the damage is already done and i look like a freak or agressive weirdo
#ganondoodles talks#also probably sounds like self pity#but this feeling hits everytime i see a super popular artist be the popular cool artist#i am a little weird i know that and thats not somethign bad i think#but the internet never gets to see that much of me#i tend to write posts when i am at my worst bc it has to go somewhere#so the image it tells people is that im a weirdly strong opiniod freak that gets breakdowns over nothing#i also dont feel like im otherwise -cool tm- enough to balance that out#i dont think my art is as stylized or as inventive as others nor am i cool to interact with bc idk how to be cool to interact with#i feel double bad when i misstepped with someone i used to talk to bc of something stupid ... or just dont know what i did wrong#im guessing its especially when i am in that spiraling state of mind where i really am not myself tbh#it still feels very bad bc i feel like i can never make it up to anyone again#sorry i acted like a jerk my brain was exploding in emotions in a desperate attempt to deal with something idk how to deal with-#-and made me not act like myself but now i feel really dumb about it#doesnt sound like a good excuse#... i want to thank those that do stick with me#even if i acted strange sometimes- even if i disappointed sometimes- even when i couldnt keep a promise#there are little things that still make me angry at myself#like that one time i asked in the tags whod read as long as the end of them and if someone did shoudl send me an ask so id draw a lil thing#and i got two#and i kept trying to remeber oh shit i need to do that and forgetting again/not having energy for it in a loop#i still feel like a jerk about it but now its probably too late#i wish i could answer all asks i get but man my energy for that is always rock bottom#no matter how much i enjoy the ask#and i love getting asks!!!#im sorry :((
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skunkes · 4 months
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having struggles with hobbies and enjoyment and creativity again
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spacedlexi · 11 months
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trying to keep all my clemviminnie thoughts contained until i get to episode 3 but
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its hard
#telltale was CRAZY for this btw!! the drama of it all ALWAYS gets me#violet blaming herself for her gf/minnies death. clem helps her open up again. starts dating clem. finds out minnie is still alive?#saved violet telling clem she has nothing to worry about and she'll fight minnie if she has to to keep clem and her loved ones safe#kidnapped violet getting brain poisoned by minnie into turning against clem after feeling betrayed and abandoned by her#saved vi shooting minnie to save clem!!!!!!!!! but cant leave minnie behind because she already left her once and she cant do it again#vi begging minnie to stop trying to fucking kill them but shes too far gone. the 3 of them fight to the DEATH!!!#now add all that to the parallels and dark mirrors going on between clem and minnie in the A plot like the tension is off the charts#plus the parallels you can draw between clem and vi but those are less “you are my dark mirror” and more “we are the same i understand you”#HOW are the girlies not still talking about this#you know what i partially blame myself i dont talk about it enough either. i forget how many things ive left in my wips folder sometimes#UGH its all so good violets route just ads so much Flavor to the clem/minnie plotline its Delicious i couldnt imagine it Not being there#i neeeeeeeed to draw them fighting and being gay and maybe bloody even#if u cant tell i really want to get back to that wip i posted a few weeks ago but im Trying to Restrain Myself#i love forcing myself to take things slow sometimes really makes the brain shift into overdrive#twdg#violentine#it speaks
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good-beanswrites · 6 months
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There haven't been any Milgram headcanon requests so far, right? How about 🧸 and 💔 for Mikoto?
Mikoto time!! Thank you for the request -- I know it's risky posting headcanons so close to Double, but I'll come back and ammend anything that might be proven wrong on Wednesday 😂
🧸 A headcanon about their childhood: Through his early schooling years, Mikoto was present for a lot of extracurricular activities. He didn't always care/give his all, he just enjoyed hanging out with others and fooling around. The reason he can be such good friends with everyone is because he's picked up on tons of little things over the years by dabbling in all those arts, fields of study, sports, etc. Once he finds out your hobby, he can immediately retrieve some bit of knowledge/memory to get a conversation going, or even join in the activity. Mahiru is pleasantly surprised by his classic literature references, gardening club gets him on Shidou's good side, Muu likes talking to him about fashion tips, he can play sports with Fuuta, he tries to bond over band memories with Amane, and so on. When he was a kid he was just trying things out for fun, but as an adult he's grateful he picked up on so much.
💔 An angsty headcanon: He's accustomed to, and expects, bad separations. So many friendships and relationships ended on a very sour note, so now he's used to pulling away first. (There was no aggression or violence, but) the appearance of different alters followed by the host's insistent denials would make others think poorly of him. The more he claims ignorance, the more it seems like he's just gaslighting/manipulating, so there have been a few explosive separations in which he had no idea what went wrong. Because of that, it's been harder to get close to anyone, and he will start pulling away the minute things show signs of trouble. It's why he left the smoking group so quickly, and doesn't hang out with the other prisoners as often in T2. Instead of waiting for an inevitable fight, he ends things immediately and peacefully.
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echoesofadream · 5 months
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i dont trust any big scale production of animal products but i think free range organic eggs is the best i can do cause i dont know anyone with hens that can sell me eggs on a regular basis. That would be good though if i could get in contact with a small hen farm. Also are eggs bad for you im only doing this if its good for my body nothing else
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sonknuxadow · 5 days
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i hate being overly negative about a new sonic project because. while im not against criticizing them and will criticize them when i see fit. i still try to find the positives in everything sonic even the games that are widely labelled as irredeemable garbage. because i love sonic and i hate it when sonic is the punching bag of the internet and i do genuinely believe that every piece of sonic media has at least some good qualities but like. the knuckles series really isnt very good im sorry people are right about this one . and i say this as someone who likes the sonic movies and thought knuckles was awesome in sonic 2 . where did we go wrong as a society
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hanzajesthanza · 1 year
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it kind of bothers me that witcher fans don’t really unite under sapkowski’s name like other fans of fantasy authors do (e.g. “tolkien fans”).
in practically any other fandom of fantasy books, save for the particularly rancid authors known for their disappointing and shameful behavior or views (e.g. jk r*wling), it’s just regular business to say the author’s name. but sapkowski’s name is treated like a dirty word in the witcher fandom, for really no good reason…
it must be asked — what is stopping us from doing so?! why don’t we call ourselves sapkowski fans. it would be much easier than saying “i’m a fan of the witcher, but only the books, i don’t consider the various adaptations canon, etc. etc.” … “half a hundred words, when three are enough!!”
#i was just thinking about this today. can we call ourselves andrzej sapkowski fans beginning now or what#note that i said GOOD reason#meaning that it’s not like sapkowski is a conservative#the witcher books#txt#like sapkowski has done and said stuff that i dont approve of or like#the alcoholism at cons for instance hem hem (though ive also heard that type of behavior was standard)#he’s said a few cringey things about women and lesbians but nothing worse than your typical old guy would#specifically i’m referring to the ‘i dont hate women i - he he he - positively love them!’ which is actually just everybodys granddad lmao#and the ‘i dont know about why my characters are lesbians - though i can be sure im not one’#that kind of stuff just makes me shake my head and laugh#but its not like he has done heinous shit like some of these authors running around loose out here#i mean i think it’s mitigated in part that he’s a private person with no twitter account#i also disgaree with his points from there is no gold in gray mountains but i also dont know enough abt what hes talking about to understand#understand FULLY at least. i understand some but not all. i think i understand just enough to disagree#but he has expressed a lot of progressive points which also come through in his series#what i mean is: hes not a terrible person. so why do people act like he is#ALSO i think if we united under his name then there would be more inter-series fans#ive always wondered where the fans of the hussite trilogy are (online). is there an online fanbase?#and if we do that then we can get more and better translations hopefully#like theres still no official translations for a ton of his short stories
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verflares · 4 days
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lying face down on the floor. there are so many things to draw always. that is so crazy
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ducktollers · 2 months
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who up feeling their spirit get crushed into dust by this ai shit 😂😂😂
#turns out my laptop isnt strong enough to run glaze so now i gotta wait at least a month for them to reply to my dm 😃#not on them at all ik theyre swamped but im just like. why do we have to fucking do this#like ​putting poison on our lunch so coworkers stop stealing it. Why do the coworkers get away with stealing it in the first place#why is this how things have worked out. the amount of companies ive seen use ai generation for their ads (TABLET COMPANIES.)………#im like. u used to have to pay an artist to do that. and instead of putting technicology to good use#where it can do things that are tedious/difficult/impossible for humans to do#we’ve decided to have the machines do the one job we thought a machine COULDNT steal. bc its abt human creativity and passion#why. bc it saves a bunch of rich fucks even more money and they dont give a fuck about the rest of us#this shit wouldnt even exist if human artists werent here first for it to copy its souless its nothing its cold and dead i fucking hate it#YEARS of work and experience and craft honing and nobody gives a fuck they just see a person they dont have to pay anymore#steals our lifes work without our permission without paying us without a care how is my spirit NOT supposed to feel crushed#i see an ai image and all i see is decades of hard work that was stolen like if u ripped the bones out of a living person#ik jts dramatic and i keep going on abt rhis but it just bothers me SO fucking much#every time i have to think abt it ​its like a thousand pound rock dropped into my stomach#x
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ranger-kellyn · 2 months
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team star's boss battle music is actually so fucking good???? hello??????
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