#i fear talking to cool ppl...

[taegularities]

some men are textbook villains fr

#tw religion? #kinda need to rant.. kinda wanna explain what's going on #some ppl are part of humanity but don't know how to be humane... like the guy i started talking to almost 2 weeks ago #liked him a lot bc he was funny sickeningly sweet mature and understanding.. until he was not #tl dr version is that we somehow drifted to the topic religion and i told him im not too religious and don't believe in superstition much #i was extremely respectful and even when he said that he does believe a lot i was like 'thats cool!! different people believe in different #things!!' and at first it was a normal convo until man went all psycho on me (after one damn week!!!) and started talking about how #id have to be religious in a relationship with him.. my dude i barely know your fav food can we not talk about relationships yet #but he says he doesn't even need a woman who cooks/cleans just someone who believes.. n im like i get it but i can't change myself like that #and then guy moves to marriage and is all 'well my entire family is religious' n my mom and sister (who's 16) would be putting pressure on #you n force you to pray etc.. and I'm like???? who can force anyone to a thing like that are u kidding #things escalate and my absolute STUPID ass tells him about my deepest fkn trauma to explain what made me abandon religion bc #life just never got better and this trauma remained for yrs... and he gets so angry that he says he wants to stop talking to me just to spam #me all day next day.. he'd keep messaging me switching between 'i still want you we shouldn't throw this away i have feelings for you' #AFTER A WEEEEEEKKKK!!! and then goes back to 'i wasted my time with you you were so unnecessary im in a bad mood bc of you' #even said 'you'll never find a guy with a trauma and mindset like this. i will find a religious girl but no one will love you like that' #and the worst thing is that he told his friends and mom about the trauma i had just to spite me.. note that he promised to never tell anyone #(and then still asked for forgiveness and for me to rethink whether we want to end this after telling me 473626x he wanted to end it) #(nothing even ever started you bitchass) #also note that his mom knows my mom n basically most of my relatives.. so i was here trembling for days fearing they'd get to know about it #mom somehow convinced her to not tell anyone bc it's important to me and very very fucking personal.. #but he harassed me all day - i wouldn't answer and he'd send 55 messages.. multiple missed calls like dude i got so fkn scared #my heart jumped whenever he texted he was so fkn aggressive and SO MEAN #'you just needed to adjust and we would've been okay' 'tell me are u gonna fkn be religious or not????' 'you ruined everything' kinda mean #i just :') it was the worst time and i don't think i've ever seen someone degrade me so much or make me feel this defective #but.. it's finally over. his mom called my mom and mine was like pls teach him some manners.. n since i couldn't and wouldn't text him back #and literally avoided whatsapp bc of him she ended it all for me and now it's hopefully done forever #anyway i saw jks gcf performance yday n him singing still with you put a genuine smile on my face.. ill stick to THAT boyfriend honestly lol #def gonna delete later #but ty for reading if u did <3

[warmspice]

nothing like realizing how cringe you are by scrolling through your own blog 💗

#Someone (hi btw if you're reading this I think you're so cool) went through my blog + spammed me and I wanted to scroll through to see what #What they saw and x_x #Life is literally about being alive and not looking back because if not you will never want to go forwards in fear of what you look like #From the outside #Silly blog idk why ppl follow sometimes but hi I love u I hope your day is lovely and you sleep well 💗🥰👯‍♀️ #Void talks

[deityofhearts]

y’all know how you follow really cool ppl and it’s like “wow you’re so cool I hope you never follow me/we don’t become mutuals because you’d find out i am entirely uncool and unhinged”

#deity dialogue #beaming ‘please don’t scroll through my blog I am very mentally ill on main’ at the cool butch person I follow who has been in my notes #because I’m p sure that one of my beloved mutuals who is already aware I’m a pathetic puddle of a person is mutuals with them #but yeah it’s like. if people I find cool follow me or check out my blog I live in utter fear of them going ‘oh they’re like actually sad a #goodbye forever’ ahdjfjtkt #idk how sad and weird it is to admit that every day I sit here and wonder if a beloved mutual is finally gonna go ‘okay I’ve had enough of #fae’ and unfollow me #this is also why I take a while to follow ppl back because I need to see if I’ve scared ppl off yet #I keep saying I plan to be less unwell on main #rn I’m getting back into tagging my sad posts (divine despair if you don’t know is the tag to block) #tbh I’m also just trying to make this year better but god I am so sad all the time the despair is like Bad #but today was good! so no super sad posts!! #hhhhh what am I even talking abouttttt #anyways shout out to my beloved friends and mutual ilyyy hiii if you read this far wow #actually does anyone read my tags because I talk so much like I’m incapable of shutting up (it’s terminal I fear) #<- the words of someone who is aware they talk so much and hates it and has had people try to silence them (my family also hates that I tal #a lot and use to bribe me into shutting up) #I must shut up now goodbye #see this is why cool people can’t follow me like

[the-acid-pear]

I was watching some alternatives to the Laura escape scene (i had only seen shooting him in the guts and drugging him) and honestly? Seeing Travis being genuinely scared for his life, with that tremble in his voice and the lil pleads it. It hurts emotionally a lil ngl-

#luly talks #the quarry #travis hackett #so glad i didnt see this at the peak of my hyperfixation because i would actually be crying and throwing up like Mbendbdmdbd NOOO 😭😭😭 #i just love it when bitches who are constantly in dangerous situations still dont wanna die and fear this it makes me sooo sad 🥰😢 #this game truly has way more to it than i fucking imagined truly a shame it took SO FUCKING LONG for ppl to find out #sometimes i forget how much of a poor little meow meow Travis is bc he's cool and cold n stuff but. he IS a poor little meow meow 🥺🥺🥺💞

[panthermouthh]

I think I’d like to start doing small comics that are more personal, but I’m also kind of embarrassed about the idea of doing a comic with Me in it, u know what I mean? Like it’d be too egotistical of me to draw my own face over and over >:/

#I don’t think that’s True by the way #tons of comic artists I follow draw themselves and I think it’s cool #but only for Them not for me it’d be dumb if I did it #this is probably more to do w my fear of being perceived #and ALSO #I’m not used to drawing highly personal art #ppl can infer what ever they want about me as a person through the art I’ve made #if I sit you down and Tell you isn’t that me being pretentious #anyhoo I’m gonna try and ignore that and do it anyway #even if no one gives a fuck #talking to myself

[friendlessclown]

why are ppl so fuckign scaryyy :(((

#im scared of 11 year olds in starbucks and idk whyy #i think it might be bc i dont have any irl friends so i only rlly go out with my parents #and then i see other teenagers out together and the little social anxiety guy in my brain is like oh no they will think u are NOT COOL #anyways a middle aged woman complimented me on my boots today which was nice :•)) #also ive figured out that im mostly scared of people closer to my age #like anyone thats like 30+ im perfectly fine around aside from my usual social anxiety #unless theyre older men who sit too close to me and make too much eye contact #but even then its like;;more just being uncomfortable less outright fear #also i can talk to other ppl my age online okay for whatever reason???? #which is nice bc now i have friendss #but irl teenagers are still scary :((

[cosmicerroraftermath]

//I FUNCKEN DID IT I GOT OVER A BIT OF MY ANXIETY AND ASKED ANOTHER RPER FOR THEIR DISCORD I DID IT I DID THE SOCIAL THING!

//MA! MA I DID IT! MA I DID THE SOCIAL THINGY! MA!!! MA GET THE BALLOONS!!! GET THE CAKE I DID THE THING!!

#{Outside Of Time:OOC} #//I have Sovl's but if i recall they made a post w/ it #//This time I did an adult and asked smone in theys dms #//Very few ppl will understand how much of an achievement this is #//I have a fear of people and DMing is a terror esp w/ ppl I don't talk to often but wanna get to know coz they seem vibin #//Then I went and said sum stupid shit abt my anxiety and honestly #//'m worried they gon change thems mind fgsdgfdfg #//anxiety: lol tell them it'll be fine they'll laugh #//also anxiety: cool now you might look stupid :) #//me: HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH thanks

[holographicbutch]

There NEEDS to be more bug people in scifi

#like for one i just really like bugs and think theyre cool #but also the concept of people interacting w an intelligent species that resembles something a lot of ppl are afraid of #is very interesting to me. like do you get over your fear of bugs from talking to this intelligent species or do you just #not talk to them/interact w them at all?? and the social implications of that #idk i just think its interesting. bug ppl <3

[faithfromanewperspective]

seeing criticisms of taylor being like. no, this is true and this is valid. she's not perfect. but then also, i feel like i'm gonna have to keep saying it because people can't ever get their heads around it: there are ways her brain works that are gonna impact her activism if/when she does it?? the same brain that brings us all these songs that made her famous to begin with. that tells her story in ways that people do sometimes criticise. i don't know who (if anyone) people are trying to compare her with. she's also not obligated to share what her limits and boundaries are and why. but the concept of not everyone living up to whatever your neuronormative standards are, especially everyone who is famous or successful--don't you see the harm that could do if we don't ever realise that? activism is an interconnected ecosystem of people each with their own limits, even if we don't all fit into (or we do fit, but we don't want to disclose it) some box of neurodivergent and thus exempt from certain things because of our disability. it works best when we show up as ourselves and don't have to perform it--and that includes being non-neurotypical if that's what we are. in ways that people like to moralise sometimes too. and deciding each of us for ourselves what our own limits are--and sometimes that does mean that someone could be drastically helped by something and yet we're still unable to do it. so judge imperfection all you like, but if you think it's actually helping towards the causes you care about--it might be doing the opposite

#taylor swift #and i'm also gonna tag #neurodivergence #neurodivergent liberation #celebrities are people #and before people come at me. i'm not hc'ing taylor as a neurodivergence specifically in this post. but i'm using it in a broad sense #so things like anxiety and depression which do present differently for everyone and have different triggers count!! they do impact ppl #some of these things taylor has talked about impacting her #you can see it if you look for it. and i hope we're past invalidating that #but also. there are forms of neurodivergence and this applies more broadly than taylor that do impact the kinds of things we moralise #like changing sense of self. not knowing what we want. fears for actual safety whether they're founded or not; worth the risk or not #and i'm sick of people conveniently not talking about them in order to judge people basically #having said all this. we desperately need to restructure systems that make fame such a platform to begin with and overconsumption #and redesign ways to survive things like public image in order to achieve the greatest good through everyone's unique limitations #trust me you're gonna be a lot happier when you stop just blaming people and start brainstorming; what ways can we improve this? #anyway leaving you with this rant. rb's appreciated bc i like my thoughts being heard and i like neurodivergent liberation #heck even disagree and chat about that i'm cool with that

[crowtechs]

le sighs and screams loudly into my hands

#im just gonna talk about it in the tags lol #i wanna like participate more in fandom spaces but i never really do that because i get so scared #i mean sure writing fics and all is fun but like ... idk #on twitter seeing ocs for it is soooo cool but i feel if i do it no one would like it idk #i think thats just my overthinking and second guessing myself #i wanna be more active and all that with fandoms but just fear #its always this its always the stupid fear #i think its also more on the fact that i get terrified because i feel someone will see what i post on there??? #idk i just #i wanna be a part of it because it seems so fun and the community just seems so nice?? #i just have so many issues with socialising i am so socially awkward idk what to say without being weird??? #this always happens! aaaaaaaaa #i mean i know i have to like nothing will happen if i dont try to be open but i still get so scared #im not even gonna talk about what the fandom is for personal reasons but its literally the thing thats keeping me sane lol #its just??? i wanna talk about my silly ocs too but i cannot out of FEAR AAAAAAAAAAAAAA #i was so like “im gonna be more active and engaging on twitter!” and then i DONT out of fear! #man. wish i was like normal and not socially anxious all the time oh well #i guess tumblr is easier to talk about this sort of thing than twitter anyway?? #but ppl who are on tumblr in this fandom hate this one character i absolutely adore so </3 #idk what to do le sigh #its fine things will always turn out better #maybe its because i wanna draw and i wanna be good at it too? idk #im fine i think sort of. i dont know. i wish i just was so scared about this sort of thing #no one is like being mean to me about it so idk why im scared #maybe i just never been nicely welcomed into fandom spaces :\ #idk #haha sorry #i just needed to vent in the tags i guess #kaden txts #<- yeah. fine. i dont care.

[toastsnaffler]

I was on the wikipedia page for phobias just for fun but just discovered theres an actual word for a fear of being touched.. 🥹

#haphephobia.... and they list guts from berserk under pop culture references 😢😢😭😭 thats my guy.... #not gonna lie i teared up a bit i didnt realise it 'counted' as an actual phobia #i find it really difficult to talk abt but i have a complicated relationship w touch/physical contact (likely trauma babeyy) #and while i do crave it a lot i also have a very physical reflexive fear response especially if its intentional + i dont expect it #which can sometimes even get triggered just being in proximity to ppl bc like. even the possibility sets me on fucking edge #it would be nice to be as physically affectionate as i naturally want to be without dealing w my fight/flight/freeze but alas #its weird bc there are some random situations where it doesnt get triggered at all but its so unpredictable every time #and varies wildly person to person for seemingly no reason. there r strangers im innately more comfortable with but also friends ive known #for years and will never be comfortable around. i think part of that depends on how strongly the other person communicates and whether- #i feel as if theyre demonstrably able to respect boundaries not just mine but their own too + understand theyre not always fixed #ideally i need to have had this conversation with them so i Know they understand. which is rly difficult i find it so hard to admit #and i have a complicated mental block where i need the other person to naturally bring it up which very very rarely ever happens #idk just an atmosphere of safety yknow. i think its intentional touch that specifically makes me panic bc im usually fine w like- #bustling crowds or even expected social rules like handshakes at interviews. bc its not like they're Trying To Touch Me its just rote idk #hopefully eventually ill reach a place where im able to unpack it and reduce its severity bc man sometimes its fucking heartbreaking to me #bc i do genuinely really like physical contact im an incredibly physical person its my main way of interacting w the world #and the way having to force myself to avoid it meshes w my rsd too augh.... its a clusterfuck #even just having one person im completely comfortable with. maaaaan. #almost makes me miss my ex. at least i was mostly cool around them #god its sucked lately ive been having weird vivid dreams related to it. but whatever its so far down my list of problems to prioritize #and at least i dont get it w my familys dog so i can cuddle her :^) i miss her i cant wait to see her next month :D #anywayyyy thats enough im so tired goodnight every1... #.diaries

[okcat]

eee

#so me n my bf r an ~international couple~ (not long distance lol) #n tn was the first time we talked abt our initial fears and hangups about that #oh and our preconceived notions #it was such a cool and eye opening conversation to have! just seeing how one nation might view the other #something that rly stood out to me was #when he said he thinks us being different and having a language barrier is an interesting point for him #bc. i feel the same way 😳 like ofc it can come w its difficulties but there's just something #so special and enjoyable #about having to navigate each other and our relationship in a not so straightforward way #bc it somehow leads to such a deep understanding and appreciation of each other? #when usually ppls fear would be that reaching a deep understanding is extremely difficult #also nailed in how stereotypes r just that. stereotypes. #and we're both so different from what we expected each other to be #ahhhh eeeeee #also i learned a lot of new things about him it's just so fun ☺️ #so crazy to me how surface level and uncomfortable and confusing prev 'relationships' have been. even tho #even tho we spoke the same language and grew up in the same society #like there's truly no excuse #boyfie has none of those things yet he alwaaayyyys makes an effort to reassure me and let me know his feelings #men do better #anyway sry block me im gonna bf post every now and then

[fairymosh]

bro

#can we pls finally talk abt the socially anxious fear of having your selfie be the icon in a zoom meeting?? like i dont want my camera on #bc FUCK that my professor cant make me show my face but i also don't want to feel like ppl are staring at my selfie either??! #my professor is just going to have to be okay with my bar mirror selfie bc i actually like it and my face is very visible #its visible and its giving cool mirror pic not doe eyed selfie ugh #i usually love my doe eyed look but not in a selfie classroom meeting way. like be so fucking real

[elliesdoll]

𝜗𝜚 thinking about sitting on abby’s lap. taking over all of my thoughts. like you’re assigned with her on a little patrol sesh and a few other ppl. u guys ride on the back of those combat truck thingies, but there definitely is no room for ur butt on any area of that vehicle. so, reluctantly offering, abby leans back a bit and pats her knee gently. “you can sit here, if you want.” and jesus you can’t tell if you’d rather die or if this is what you’ve been dreaming of. you shake your head, not wanting to make a fool of yourself, you shake your head and laugh. “no no, it’s fine. i can crouch here.” while gripping the side of the truck, knowing you’re bound to slip from the gravelly bumpy roads you travel on. abby shakes her head and ushers you with her hand. “cmon, you’re gonna bust your ass if you do. just sit on my leg, it’s no big deal.” you don’t wanna hold up the group any longer, so you oblige. you sit yourself snug on her right thigh. god, it’s so firm and so thick. she’s just pure fucking muscle. you had that underlying fear of being too heavy or uncomfortable for her, but abby never looked happier. leaned back, elbows resting on the edges of the truck while she talks with manny. internally though, she’s freaking out a lil. but you know she’s too cool to show it. as you guys drive off, the bumpy path makes you slip a bit, using your feet to try and steady yourself on her leg. abby takes notice of this, and grabs your hips ever so gently, sliding you up to her upper thigh. “don’t want you to fall off.” she says, to which you respond with an awkward chuckle and a nod. your ass obviously now has more room on her firm lap, and she just keeps you there. definitely not gonna get back to ur room and ride the fuck out of ur pillow, fantasizing abt her thighs. how badly you just wanna grind your cunt down so slightly— maybe she wouldn’t notice with how bumpy the ride was. you resist of course. if only you knew that abby was resisting turning you around and having you cum on her thigh right then and there, in front of everyone else.

need her in a way that creates a new sin in the bible sawry

photo creds to seraqhite on pinterest 😝

daily click palestine masterpost read this!

#dolly’s stuff 𝜗𝜚 #tlou2 #abby tlou2 #abby anderson smut #lesbian #abby tlou #abby the last of us #it would heal me #i’m braindead rn tbh sorry..

[somewhereincairparavel]

Hear me out. Jason Grace would NOT understand meme culture or gen z jokes. Like. At all. This man is a dorky dad in a child's body.

Jason would just do a cool backflip or sumn and Piper would go "oh my gosh slayyy" and he'd get all serious and alert, draws his gladius and goes "Where's the monster I need to slay Piper? Where is it????"

Leo would call him a pookie bear, and Jason would be like "??? Frank's the bear" and "What is a pookie, it is a very peculiar sounding word" with the most adorable clueless puppy face ever.

Piper and Leo would be in TEARS.

Bc. Jason grace, the Son of Jupiter. Child of rome. Toppler of the black throne. Praetor of the twelfth legion. Slayer of krios. The golden celebrity of camp jupiter. Cold intimidating feral boy who most ppl even fear standing next to. Doesn't know what a pookie bear is.

Also, Jason would HATE HATE HATE the "womp womp" jokes (which Leo makes ALOT lmao) it's legit like the Bane of his existence.

Bc he doesn't get it? Like when Annabeth gives them all a very serious Architectural nerdy explanation about the exteriors of the new rome shrines, Leo would just go "womp womp" like so out of the blue.

Annabeth would be fucking furious, and Jason would be like super annoyed aswell bc. dude. What was the point of interrupting such a great nerdy yapping session, like, I was enjoying that. You killed the vibe.

(We all know it's canon that Jason and annabeth love yapping and geeking out in cursive together, so they BOTH hate the womp womp jokes with a burning passion BC IM TRYNA TALK HERE)

#He's a cute clueless wolfy boy your honour #Like technically slay is a very posh and old term for “kill” and Jason being Roman is ALL about posh and ancient terms #Jason and the Romans literally yap in cursive English. Using fancy ass words like slay and all. #pjo #pjo fandom #percy jackson #jason grace #pjo hoo #pjo series #pjo hoo toa #annabeth chase #piper mclean #leo valdez #frank zhang #hazel levesque #nico di angelo #reyna ramirez arellano #reyna avila ramirez arellano

[yellowhearther0]

well now im all sad. what the hell

#sagittarius.txt #its the anxietyyyyy </3 #so many cool people who i will never get 2 properly talk 2 out of fear like thats so sad 2 me :( #like this is all /nsrs nd all but still #so many cool ppl that i could talk 2 nut cant bc im scared that ill come off as annoying or smth #2bf im scared of that anyway but i have 1.1k and have only gotten a hate anon once so i must not be too bad