#i have rambled pardon me

[sunstone-smiles]

My first perfect expedition with him and this is the first thing he says-

*Places the switch down and breathes in*

I needed a moment

#Sunstone speaks #Pardon Sunstone's ramble #I've been waiting a WEEK to post this #School has kept me busyyyy #But I got to play Fire Emblem for an assignment and write a paper on how the FE fandom has impacted me so that was cool! #Also: I'll be sharing a some doodles/ drawings near the end of this week #I didn't think I would share them at first (since they were more for me Lol) but my friends suggested I share them! #And I was debating on it anyway Lol #P.S: I may or may not have gotten a new idea for a fic with Hubert because of this expedition- #fire emblem #fire emblem three hopes #hubert von vestra

[momentomori24]

Does anyone think about how isolated Fubuki might feel being the only one to keep her memories after rewinding time? Considering the amount of trouble she gets herself into or gets dragged into, ranging from relatively harmless to downright dangerous, how many times did she have to turn back time to save herself or someone else? She can get hurt or find herself in deadly danger, and while her powers can erase that ever having truly happened, they can't erase her memories. Someone could be injured or die on her watch and then just walk and talk to her like nothing ever happened, but she'd still remember. And that's the worst part: she remembers what happened, actually experienced it herself, but it never really happened. Not as far as anyone else is concerned. While she lives with whatever trauma she endured, everyone else remains completely indifferent and the world continues on the same. How alone do you feel living like that?

And it's not even like this all could've just happened before she arrived in Kanai Ward. She literally deals with this a bunch of times in the game. Whenever Yuma screws up in Chapter 3, Yakou being stabbed by the hitman in Chapter 4, that guy that fell from the casino in her DLC-- she has go back to prevent tragedy over and over again, and she only manages to save two of three people mentioned in the end. She had to live through watching Yakou dying, bleeding out on that floor twice, unable to do anything about it twice. Not to mention god knows how many times Yuma almost got them run over or blown into bits when failing to disable the bombs or caught by peacekeepers. Not to mention the two times the casino guy died on her before she unintentionally saved his life (by having him crash land onto her taxi which is already scary enough).

All this would be fucked up on its own, but her really spotty memory isn't doing her any favours at all (hell, her Forte might even be part of the reason she's as scatter-brained as she is). It kinda makes me wonder how she differentiates between what truly happened and what happened before she rewinded time (so what technically didn't happened). If she even can, that is. I would've loved to see a throwaway scene where she randomly mentions something that that only she knows happened or perfectly predicts the very near future only for someone to be like "wtf are you talking about" and brushing it off as typical Fubuki weirdness as a little hint of her Forte before its actual reveal.

Fubuki is pretty strong to deal with all the shit that gets thrown at her and still choose to be as happy and compassionate and optimistic as she is, but I'm so glad she had Yuma to lean on and didn't have to shoulder that burden of knowledge and the physical strain alone, even if it was only for a while. She deserves to finally confide in someone and some mental relief after all the times she didn't have anyone, I think. Her ability may be the most OP one out of everyone, but it's a blessing as much as it is a curse.

#master detective archives: rain code #rain code #fubuki clockford #just thinking about her today #i just love fubuki and the angst potential with her is very tempting to explore #i have this short comic in my head where yuma ends up getting shot by a peacekeeper and she has to rewind time and live the trauma of it #but i do not have the artistic skill to pull that off unfortunately for me and fortunately for her #and like i said i love her and she's a sweetheart so i want to be nice to her. for now #anyway just food for thought. i wish the game or at least her dlc touched more on the horror aspect of her forte #or her struggles to navigate having as much power as she does and the consequences of it all #momento rambles #pardon any potential typos #i'm tired so i hope this makes sense

[tobeblamed]

listen i get it

i get that spn seasons 1-5 are some of the most genre-defining, unfathomably excellent pieces of media in television history

but- hear me out.

i'll admit, we've had some sloppy and at times, mediocre writing in later seasons. but the themes of late seasons are some of the most disturbing, psychological horror pieces of storytelling in the sci-fi horror genre.

like . can we take a second to appreciate:

season 6: sam's inner battle between the ego vs. the id

season 7: the horror of sam not knowing what's real and what's an illusion the whole time

season 8: dean's return from a lawless land of kill or be killed, having to learn how to be human beyond just survival instinct

season 8: sam's entire journey of self-purification

season 9-10: ✨ toxic masculinity✨ let's fucking goooooooo

season 12: mary relearning how to live and catching up with life after being gone for 3 whole ass decades

season 13: jack's nature vs. nurture. we had plenty of that ngl, wouldn't hurt to have more

season 14: ummmm can we talk about dean creating a literal mental prison cage to keep an overpowered archangel in and hearing him banging on the door inside his mind 24/7 because what the fuck-

#ooc. #said this once and i'll say it again #had s/pn been airing now instead of back in 2012 #it would have had 10 rock solid episodes each season #and every season would have been outranking the previous #because what the fuck #these themes #these absolute gems #these fucking HORRIFYING CONCEPTS #ON CABLE TV???? #shitposts. #pardon me i have to ramble about how much i love s/pn at least once a week and i haven't done that in a while #bc for every one of my posts there's at least 10 ppl complaining about x and y and z #and my aries ass gotta defend my comfort show until the day i die

[heart-of-a-rebel16]

Djwivrsjdhdhv *trips over myself to drop into your inbox*

Friend friend

In your tags earlier on your post, you know the one the one-

When you were asking why The Bendu, a Lasat God, was on atollon????

I've been searching, but I can't pinpoint where exactly the star cluster leading to Lira San is located, but considering that some time VERY long ago, the Lasat people left Lira San and settled on Lasan, there's a good chance they made stops along the way, maybe stayed for prolonged periods of time.

Maybe the manifestations of The Ashla/The Bendu/The Bogan made attachments to some of these places. What if Atollon was one of the stopping points along the way from Lira San to Lasan?????

Okay bye now I have a one shot I'm working on and an interview I'm preparing for, so do with the above ramblings of a mad fan what you will-

OH THATS SO COOL!!!!!!!!!!!

In a similar vein, Lira San was hidden just like Atollon was (though obviously not to the same degree), so maybe there should be a manifestation of the Ashla on Lira San just like the Bendu (except with way less spider caves, lucky for Zeb).

pardon my brief theological ramblings for a bit, but I’m bouncing between the bogan, Bendu, and Ashla being a pantheon and being triune (meaning they are at the same time distinct and the same whole, I.e in trinitarian christianity Jesus is fully Jesus and fully god at the same time). If they were triune, that’s actually pretty fascinating, because it prevents something like tcws mortis arc from happening (where one kills the other), because they are fully each other and fully separate at the same time. It also strengthens that the force is genuinely neutral, and that they truly are consubstantial in the fact that they are of the same substance but perform different actions/uses.

BUT ON THE OTHER HAND, if they’re a pantheon of gods, a) that makes it way, way easier for them to operate separately of each other, b) it allows for lesser gods in the hierarchy of Lasat gods, c) it allows for infighting among the gods (i.e a celestial war, which could maybe still fit with the consubstantial triune thing if I got freaky with it?). Maybe the bogan could not be evil just like the ashla maybe couldn’t be good, they’re just manifestations of light and darkness. AND THEN, that allows for sects and cults to form where extremist groups elevate one of the three above the other and twist their desires to fit their own agendas (I’ve already kinda started with this on Stars Go Dim, be on the lookout for Eversor :3).

#AUAUAUAUAAAAOOGHHH I AM HAVING IDEASSSS #pardon the theological ramblings #I really wanted to be a pastor when I was eight and now the theology hyperfixation is coming back full fucking force #Actually #since I’m already here #I’m just gonna come up with Lasat religion and theology myself #Lasat theology #(That’s the tag!) #All this to say is that maybe there’s a planet out there with a manifestation of the bogan #And now I’m already coming up with designs for their celestial forms #And I think I want them to have Lasat forms as well?? #Baby we are so fucking in for it :D #I cannot WAIT to expand this further #(And if you’ve made it this far down in the tags #give me your ideas lads!) #star wars rebels #swr #sw rebels #zeb orrelios #garazeb orrelios

[eccentricmoonlight]

I’m curious cause I’ve seen a lot of mixed opinions on Nice so how are we feeling about Nice specifically as a character. Not about happyele adding more characters to the game but specifically about Nice himself because I personally think he looks like a funky little guy but I’ve seen a lot of people being mean about him ):

#idk if other people have made polls about this. I haven’t been on tumblr much on account of my life fell apart and then hermitage started. #as I type this I have Enstars running on my computer to grind event points #and I am also trembling from the anxiety medication I started today #so my life is a mess pardon me if I’m a touch behind #Enstars #nice arneb thunder #polls #yori rambles

[always-a-joyful-note]

Maybe as cliche as it is, the fact that the culmination of so many well through out plots and the fact that the point of so many good stories is love will never not fail to absolutely resonate. Maybe at the end of the day, love can't stop bad things from happening. But maybe it will help you get through them. Maybe love won't fix you, but maybe it heals you enough to want to be fixed.

#another way to put it is that you can have a good story that isnt centred around love #and you can also have bad stories that are centred around love #but there is something special about a good story that has love in its many forms as the theme #this is the ramblings of a person who got hit by anesagi's 'these unspoken promises are all just love' #idolish7 #also.... #orv #omniscient reader's viewpoint #fairy tales #fandom spamdom #note's notes #i couldnt help it....this post is also orv #everything is orv if youre brave enough to me #pardon the orvification of idolish7 but......

[giggly-squiggily]

Heyo 👋 (Hiatus Update)

Hey! I'm still on my hiatus and probably won't be back for another week or so- no real dates or promises but more a vibe-but I wanted to pop in and give y'all a little update since my hiatus post.

I'm better, though not great- but I'm getting there. To be honest, it's kinda difficult to make this little update, and I'm not even going into details about anything, hehe.

The biggest thing I wanted to say is a huge, huge thank you to everyone. Your condolences and messages really helped me get through this, and while I'm still processing it all, I'm beyond grateful to y'all. My heart goes out to those who've lost someone beloved as well; be it a pet or a person- my heart goes out to you and your loved ones through these difficult times.

(God, and I thought 2020 was bad! /hj)

I think I'm gonna try coming back sometime in September/October? No promises but I think I'll be okay enough to return around then. How I feel upon posting this will be my deciding factor lols. I did finish the last few days of Tickletober (yay! :D) so that's something to look forward to, and I updated my Fluffy Forecast (even if I'm not on, I'll still update it for y'all- it gives me something to do, you know?)

Writing wise is still...hesitant. Some fandoms like Spy x Family and Buddy Daddies might be on the backburner due to recent events (that said, please don't be afraid to send prompts/requests in for them; I just likely won't be touching them for a hot minute), but besides that I'm slowly getting back into writing and creating again. My dad wouldn't want me to give up on my passions and life in his passing; he raised me to be strong, and I'm gonna do that for him.

Thank you for reading! Talk to you later! <3

#squiggily rambles #life update #Figured I'd let y'all know how I'm doing #eventual return #hiatus update #tw: grief #tw: death mention #writing updates #I wanted to thank y'all for the kind words #I won't be answering anything or anyone ala ask dm or reply cause I don't know if I have the strength to do that right now #but I see you and god I appreciate y'all so much #Genuinely helps and I mean that with my whole chest #pardon my rambling I figured I'd post this and see how I feel #depending on me is whether I'm ready to jump back in or not #But i do feel better; not great but better #getting there one day at a time #drawing helps #as does Don't Starve interestingly enough #Kinda bought it on a whim almost a year ago and now I'm getting around to playing it lols #It's lovely #see y'all later~

[todayisafridaynight]

At which point did you realise that the plot of IW is ass? I've seen people complain only about the ending or the halfway point where the teams separate, while I was already actively rolling my eyes like four-five chapters in

i think the moment i fully accepted that IW's story was. Definitely A Story was the moment ebina announced 'bleach japan'. like i think leading up to that point i was thinking to myself 'oh i hope i see X happen' or being like 'i wonder where this is going' and that sort but the proverbial bucket of ice was definitely that moment

#infinite wealth spoilers #snap chats #what reaaaaally hammered it in too if it wasnt obvious already was the execution of the jimas/daigo like that still irks me LMAO #i cant even remember what chapter that happened in i just know when it did i was utterly pissed #i think i started to take things less seriously once bryce entered the picture but thats only because of how distracting his VA was #like much love the JP voice actors who try to speak english and japanese but i just cant act like it's not incredibly distracting #esp when the character is supposed to be white yk what i mean- or at the very least their first language is supposed to be english #typically i can look over that thing if its a one or two time kind of deal but he had to speak in english much longer than others #im just rambling about bryce tho this aint bout him. i mean he could be a part of it the cult was executed really sloppily #it might have been the introduction of bryce actually ... i remember thinking to myself 'oh brother' with the whole messiah thing LMAO #maybe it was when kiryu told us his cancer cam from radiation instead of. smoking 💀 ESPECIALLY not even five chapters in #like straight out the gate you just wanna drop that on us mr I Can Do Everything Myself I Cant Worry Others ok #thats a post for another day tho im EVERYWHERE #POINT IS this is not about Retrospect this is about First Impressions and memory warps over time #but i know for a fact i found the bleach japan thing utterly ridiculous and was squinting at the plot the entire time thereafter #like ive said this a million times at this point but although i love IW for it's gameplay (pardon some nitpicks like lack of shortcuts) #its story really feels so messy and had much to be desired. which is so sad after the wonderful stories rgg has been making since 0.. #BUT OH WELL im still excited to replay it in english. god willing i ever get the time #i still wanna finish lost judgment <- isnt even halfway through the game #and i wanna do a fun stream Maybe with YK2 but ill get into that when i get into that #if youve read this far. thanks LOL id say sorry for the novel but thats what we expect of me at this point

[dye-it-rouge-et-noir]

Uh. Sincerely, what just happened.

#(insert jazz hands) elliot carver from james bond moment am i right haha but you don't know how terrifying it was to check tumblr for me #i have 30 followers and only around 10 who actually interact with me so pardon me why did that ai post made for 10 people max take off #genuinely thank you all who shared the post around but i thought i was the target of the day when i saw the notifications #my ramblings

[darkseldarine]

Still baffled that I’ve met people who’ve been of the “drow are inherently evil” opinion. The word ‘indoctrinating’ is literally in Homeland to refer to how drow children are raised. Chapter five sentence two it’s just RIGHT THERE. It’s not even subtext it’s Just Text. What is going on.

#Drizzt read through #The answer is that for a certain subset of people it’s probably like a shibboleth #Pardon me if I’m rambling a bit more on this and if this is all poorly worded but it's just like. #Salvatore is writing what's (so far to me) pretty clearly a story about a society led by a cult #(furthermore with a god who has a VERY TANGIBLE influence) #And the mechanics of how this society works and how it affects people and how people move within it #And also how people (plural (not just Drizzt)) chafe against it in different ways #Reading it again makes some of the talking points I've seen people have feel so out of context that it’s kinda jarring #It’s like people are talking about a funhouse version of the material in the book hanging out on my nightstand #There's more I can attempt to say on this but I don't want to write an essay LMAO. I'm sure people have said all this before as well #(read: I'm sure that I vaguely remember a post that was basically about this) #so I won't reinvent the wheel :P

[headofocs-inklesspen]

Evangelion is probably, hands down one of my favorite franchises. If not one of the most formative series I was introduced to in late middle school (doctor who being the other). I rewatch it a lot. When 3.33+1.01 (Thrice Upon a Time) was released I rewatched the entire series in order starting with the orignal anime season.

I was introduced through the rebuilds. Around 2015, Adult Swim’s Toonami block did a special airing of 1.11(you are (not) alone), 2.22(you can(not) advance), and 3.33(you can(not) redo). I remember DVR’ing them because they showed at like 3am Friday, Saturday, and Sunday in order.

There’s not a lot of experiences from my early teens I actively wish to relieve, but sometimes I rewatch the Rebuilds late at night just to try. Just to, for 2 hours, feel like I’m 14, witnessing Shinji Ikari’s three movie mental breakdown for the first time again. It’s midnight and I have the volume way down and the subtitles on because I’m definitely not supposed to be up but I can’t look away. I understand for the first time, the appeal of mecha anime, a subgenre that up to then never interested me. I also think NGE played a significant part in why I like psychological horror (and what I like in psychological horror) with the way the series systemically picks apart each major character in a uniquely way tragic.

Shinji is a loser, and he has his father to blame and himself to blame and being human to blame. And the series is about giant robots and confusing plot lines but it’s also fundamentally about humanity and human connection and as someone who, at the time was the same age as the kids, who struggled with connecting with other people despite wanting to, Evangelion hit me in a way that I’ll likely never fully articulate.

#crow rambles #long post #neon genesis evangelion #evangelion #pardon me I’m a little tipsy off wine rn and having just rewatched 1.11 has me having thoughts #absolutely no hate to the anime season because it is equally good #but watching the rebuilds at midnight fundamentally changed how I felt about anime #it was the first time I had watched something like that and was left with a part of my brain chemistry rewritten #nothing anime wise I had watched up to that point had had the same impact #and little of what I’d watched at all movies or tv had had that impact

[feroluce]

Ingo attending some festival or celebration at the main pearl clan settlement in the icelands. It's more a thing for younger people but he's curious about their customs and goes anyway. Some of it involves people dancing and he starts to look really deep in thought, so Irida asks what he's doing. Ingo says he thinks there was something similar where he came from, but it's kinda fuzzy, especially since it was a two-person thing and he can't really reenact it himself. Irida doesn't want him to miss the opportunity of a memory, they come so rarely, so she asks him to dance with her and show her.

Ingo has Irida stand in front of him, and then pauses while he tries to remember. Finally he awkwardly directs her to put her hands on his shoulders and settles his own on her waist (Ingo starts to blush like a maiden at this point because he'd forgotten how close you're supposed to be for this- Irida gives zero shits lol). Ingo tries to take a few steps and Irida tries to follow his lead, but it's hesitant and awkward and Irida starts to get miffed after the third time Ingo accidentally steps on her foot.

Ingo finally just huffs and gets over his embarrassment, lifts Irida up and sets her standing on the tops of his own shoes so he can do the steps himself without having to try and direct her. Less distraction means the memory comes a little easier, and he starts to finally move less hesitantly and awkwardly. Irida had been looking at their joined hands, and she looks back up at Ingo to say something about how his people have odd ideas about dancing, but when she sees him she nearly bites her tongue off in an effort to stop herself. Because Ingo has his eyes closed, looking content for once, he's even humming some strange tune to himself, and she can tell he's not really present right now. He's here physically, but his heart is obviously elsewhere, and Irida would rather take a tumble down the cliffs than interrupt it. So she just kinda lays her head on Ingo's shoulder, listens to his humming through his chest, and lets Ingo whirl her around for a while longer.

Eventually Ingo kinda comes out of it and loudly apologizes before setting Irida down back on her own two feet again. Irida tells him it's unlike any dance she's seen in Hisui before, it almost just feels like walking at some parts? And Ingo gets all thoughtful again, mumbling to himself, "Walking...walk...? Wal...t. Walt. Waltz. Waltz!" and makes his frown that means he's proud of himself. Irida asks what else he remembers, since he seemed so into it. Ingo cocks his head at her. He doesn't get what she means. Irida cocks her head right back. Does he not realize he was spacing out the whole time???

And somewhere, somewhen, miles and centuries away, Emmet dances in circles around his living room, long black coat clutched against his front, humming his and Ingo's wedding song.

#nobokai #ingirida #pla ingo #pla irida #blankshipping #pardon me sometimes I just need to yell snkzjznsmz #this is basically a copy/paste of my rambling in the blankshipping server #i inflict my horrors in there on a daily basis; yall are missing out #i need to bring more of that here... I like having my stuff on tumblr too #especially if it lets me spread my Ingo & Irida agenda ♡ #i just love them being very sweet and close... #Ingo is one of Irida's now and she takes care of her own #love the image of them both cocking their heads at each other like mirrored idiots lol #i wonder what Ingo and Emmwt would have as a wedding song... #submas #ingo #warden ingo #irida #emmet

[gay-mooshrooms]

ok.

does anyone want to explain.

what the actual

FUCK

that was.

#im applying the clown makeup as we speak #we really thought #we really FUCKING thought #that not only was lokius going to be cannon #but that we were gonna have a happy ending in the first place!! #im gonna need 7-10 business days to process that #then we're gonna pull a dsmp finale and ignore it and pretend it didn't happen cus oh my GOD #i genuinely cannot belive they did that I'm furious #loki #loki season 2 #loki spoilers #loki season 2 spoilers #moosh rambles #pardon the paragraph I need to express my frustration otherwise #it will kill me

[swinging-stars-from-satellites]

I think I understand Antigone and I'm making this no one else's problem but my own. I can deal with my own devices even if those devices always break. I'm not trying to complain. I'm not complaining. I know this has to be right but I'm still here laying on the couch. world's smallest violin or whatever they say. if you go know you go as one beloved although you go without your mind.

#who can FUCKING grow me a new brother pardon my language #it’s even WORSE than you guys know literally the only person with the context here is gurt and that’s bc she spent half a month visiting #like i literally cannot explain how much this hurts why can’t i ever fucking keep anything in my life #why do i always have to be the girl who loses things why is this what God has for me why can’t i just have something to hold onto #my sister in law is leaving WE'RE TAKING HER TO THE AIRPORT tomorrow TOMMOROW #and she's the ONLY person im this safe with the ONLY person who I have like this #I'm laying on the couch freaking crying. I can't imagine being in this house without her. I don't WANT to be in this house without her #and I didn't hug my brother before he left #I'm not going to see them again for over a year and I didn't hug him before he left and it's worse than you all know #and I just fucking want something to keep #again. pardon my language #Lu rambles #sometimes I think I could write poetry

[causalityparadoxes]

USAmericans will really constantly post with the assumption that everyone will know theyre talking about America by default but then get angry when non-USAmerican have the gall to also do that.

Im sorry I didnt put up big signs saying "Not about America!!" At the top of all my personal posts! I thought we all had brains. At least the brains to not double down when the actual country of origin is mentioned.

#this is very generalised so to my cool USAmerican mutuals this is not about u 😭💙 #its just a trend and this time it hit me in the face because I was trying too hard to be nice and didnt block when I should have 😭💙 #I'm already so americanized with the internet and media and everything else in popular culture #so pardon me if I'm a little catty about americans acting like my culture is interchangeable with theirs except for the tea and queen #rambles #augh #drama

[helianskies]

i'm sorry,, i just got very emotional at the thought of a nation listening to classical music on their phone and yearning for the days they would've heard such music played for the first time by the original composers and musicians and wishing so suddenly that they could go back to those days, those years, those fresh, young melodies

#pardon me while i cry a little #and work this into a fic #i have the perfect scenario and pair #but my god. for a good minute i lost myself #how jarring it must be.. to find the likes of mozart casually playing on the radio but knowing what it would have sounded like right there #in person. face to face. the man himself sat amongst courtiers trying to impress royalty #and knowing that... it'll just never happen ever again #mmmmmmmm........ #helia rambles #hetalia