#i swear this sounded better in my head

[torhues]

iwaizumi hajime.

iwaizumi made it clear when you broke up with him— that you wouldn't get together— as if it wasn't an unspoken rule already. you weren't so sure of his words but, pride had your conscience in its hands and you agreed, saying you wouldn't even think about doing that.

now you're sitting in a fancy cake shop in Florence, with iwaizumi in front of you. the last time you saw him was in highschool, when you broke up with him on the way to airport, when he said the two of you would be just fine even in a long distance relationship, when you said it was hard for you, when he asked whether you trust him, and when you said you do but it had started to shake.

the last time you saw him was around five years ago, see you don't even remember the timeline. you've been keeping a blurry image of him walking away as a souvenir for your eyes failed to give you a clearer look back then.

the orders are sitting on the table but you don't care enough to tend to them. on other days, you would take a picture— multiple pictures— send it to your friends, post it on your social media account if you feel like it, make it another insignificant moment of your life saved in the gallery. on other days, you would enjoy the dessert but today, the pear sauce on vanilla bread seems to reduce your appetite.

"i can't believe we're meeting all the way here, in Italy," albeit, he seems to enjoy his cake.

you imagined meeting him in California or Japan, or somewhere in Canada, at most, since he always wanted to visit the country, especially during fall, and coincidently, you've enrolled in the fall course for post-graduate studies, at some university. not Italy, not in the middle of your vacation that was supposed to be some sort of self-sobriety programme.

you nod. "me neither,"

and then he starts talking about college, what he has been up to recently, directing the same questions to you while you do your best to give a brief response. it isn't the timing that is making you feel out of place but instead, it's how normal iwaizumi is. you don't expect an argument, not an iwaizumi who can never forget you for your impromptu breakup and, neither the one who would ask you to get back together because living without you feels like hell,

like diving deep into the ocean without oxygen.

you don't want to have a melodramatic conversation but, you don't want him to act like you didn't leave him with loose ends, as if you didn't hurt him when all he ever did was make you happy. you want him to hate you, to utter all the words along the lines of love and loathe, to tell you that he loved you and still did, that it was so hard to move on and every breath pierced like glass shards in the heart, that he spent nights crying while reading your texts knowing you'd never come back and when he has been doing better finally, you appear in his life like nothing ever happened, and drag him back to step one. you want him to tell you things that resonate with the yearning you have for him in his heart, desperately beautiful yet painful, so that you don't have to ask yourself over and over again, am i the only one who still feels this way?

"how's life?" you ask this once, instead of letting him ask all the questions that you don't have a definite answer to.

iwaizumi pauses, he takes a breath, a look out of the glass windows, your eyes follow his gaze, there's a soft smile on his face.

iwaizumi lifts up his fingers. "i'm engaged," he's engaged. "and it'd be appreciated if you could make it to the wedding next month," and he's inviting you to his wedding next month.

he continues about how suddenly things happened and how sorry he is for not being able to invite you to the engagement; you don't mind any of it, quite frankly. you didn't even expect him to do that after changing your number. that's not what you're worried about, that is not even the worst part.

iwaizumi is engaged.

the sixteen year old boy who told you that he'd marry you the moment you both turn eighteen, the eighteen year old guy who promised to stay by your side— one who shared his firsts with you and swore to make you his last— is engaged. your heart is racing at a thousand miles per second, and for all the wrong reasons.

now that you notice, his smile has gotten wider, and he's talking about the girl he met in college and how she makes him feel like the happiest person ever. you notice the way he still fiddles with his fingers while talking about someone or something that he adores, the way he says those words with eyes that seem like they would never run out of love to give. the sunset shines upon him, he looks exactly the way he did on your first date.

do you smile the same way at her?

you know, you're in no place to complain, for you were the one to leave him when he begged you to say. it's not that you don't want him to move on in life, you said he deserved someone better the day you broke up, it still rings in your head as a reminder of your biggest mistake. you want to happy for him but, something about him moving on and you being stuck in the same place leaves a bitter taste in your mouth.

"yn," he calls your name, you respond by shifting your eyes in his direction. "are you listening?" you are, albeit, you don't know how much you're processing.

you're picturing them together, doing everything you did with him; holding hands, going on dates, kissing, hugging, sleeping next to each other, movie nights that felt ever so intimate— you imagine her sharing every little memory but one that's a better version. you feel as if yo—

"if i ask you to get back with me, would you?" you ask, letting the words you've been suppressing for so long flow like water in a stream, one that could potentially flood everything around.

"yn, i'm engaged—"

"i mean, had you not been engaged and had i asked you to get back together," you clarify, "would you have agreed?"

there's a pause, a series of silence, strings of regret, traces of shared memories from the past that fill the little gaps in the air like blood in sinusoids. you remember your first fight with iwaizumi, and you want to know what he's thinking. it's not like you can tell, you forgot how to do that long ago. iwaizumi rarely ever looks disappointed or upset enough to give you a silent treatment. for a second, you think it's that, but it turns out you're wrong.

he doesn't look sad or angry, not disappointed at your question considering he's about to get married. instead, iwaizumi looks like he's hurting. as if he has waited for long, hoping to catch a glance of you somewhere even if it's in middle of a crowd because it's fine, that works. he can always reach you out amidst a crowd. iwaizumi looks like he doesn't have a definite answer to your question, but he is telling you that it's your fault.

a second passes and his phone rings. your eyes fall upon the caller ID, it's a name with a heart, you think it's her. it has to be, because iwaizumi, without sparing you a second glance, stands up, and puts on his coat, ready to leave. the little hope of getting an answer to that question goes off the moment he picks up his phone, or maybe even before that, because it doesn't look like iwaizumi has an answer to that.

but he stops. "no," he says.

and you realise, to him, you're the memory he buried deep in his mind while to you, iwaizumi is the air you struggle to breathe.

#♡ hues'. #♡ handmade. #iwaizumi x reader #haikyuu x reader #iwaizumi hajime #haikyuu #haikyuu fic #iwaizumi fic #haikyuu angst #iwaizumi angst #haikyuu drabbles #iwaizumi drabble #haikyuu headcanons #iwaizumi headcanons #haikyuu iwaizumi #my god what is this . #i swear this sounded better in my head #like rlly

[boba-beom]

imagine: you're vegeterian and dating beomgyu, your best friend is soobin.

beomgyu: "soobin."

soobin: "what."

beomgyu: "your best friend's vegetarian but she had my meat in her mouth last night."

soobin: "that's not how it- I didn't need to know that."

beomgyu: *shrugs* "meat is meat."

#don't ask #I it sounded better in my head #I don't even know how I came about this lmao #I'm not even vegetarian T^T #[ 🥮 ] — smiles rambles. #mdni #smiles hard hours #I swear I'm writing actual stuff :')

[muwitch]

Two genius geneticists walk into a bar They could've been such great pals in not a vampire fanclub

#miguel o'hara #spiderman 2099 #michael morbius #morbius #mu draws #LISTEN- #i swear it did sound better in my head #they were personally victimized by people with dr. stone haircut i think thats an achievement #earth 4260 #tagging it bc obv my stupid yassified ver of morb #i connected two dots-

[getoswhore]

imagine getō being addicted to this facless cam girl, only to find out it was you–his own fucking roommate and when you two fuck for the first time he recognizes your pussy 🖐

#LMFA #TRUST #IS SOUNDED SM BETTER IN MY HEAD I SWEAR #OR HE WALKS IN ON YOU #OR HE RECOGNIZES UR MOANS #sob #my brain is literally scrambled when it comes to him #💌.bella pls shut up

[akaane000]

so, I've been thinking about how mew is said to be the only virgin in the group (in the beginning ofc), but there has been no talk about ray's exes? so does that mean ray only did one night stands occasionally?

holding onto that thought, we see that sand's first relationship was with boeing, but we know nothing about ray's past except that he's been one-sidedly loving mew "since forever" according to boston- and ray doesn't strike me like the kind of person who would engage in a lot of one night stands, especially when he realises that he's in love with someone.

so considering that he's been in love with mew for a long while, it just makes me think that the most ray did was maybe just invite people for parties to his place and then they leave after, since he's always been making sure to be available as mew's emergency contact (whether he makes use of that or not). I would also think that ray would like to stay in mew's good books, so unlike his alcohol addiction, he would probably keep his one night stands very limited?

so what I'm getting at is this: is sand actually ray's first, serious relationship? (like how cute is that akgagsjsk) and also probably the first fling that he wasn't able to push away, maybe? (since he likes spending time with sand so damn much that he follows him everywhere lol - ray is seriously the dog in this relationship 😂)

#i hope this makes sense #i swear things sound better in my head #but when i type it out the thoughts get muddled up #sandray #ofts #firstkhao #sand x ray #only friends the series

[monty-glasses-roxy]

In other news, I just picked up a plastic packet full of very old spools of sewing thread and thought "okay I'll eat this and then I'll go" and my brain short-circuited for a moment. Go do what? I've no idea. It cut off completely. I'm gonna eat some sewing threads now apparently. Good for me good for me

#pop rox talks #hsjdhdjdj these meds. i swear. they're meant to make me MORE coherent but they just sorta don't #i feel better on them don't get me wrong but i do NOT get all the helpful effects you would expect I'd get from them lmao #I've seen people say they can tell when they're kicking in because rasputin slowly fades away until it's gone #on these meds i hear maybe two notes of a ring tone or an alarm or an advert song and it loops in my head till something else comes along #like djdnjd yeah i dunno man that doesn't sound exactly right #friend said it sounds like i get worse on them and ya know what? I'd believe it! #anyway. gonna go get food and see about getting some stuff done today. for once. #it's my birthday on saturday i gotta prepare #and ya know. maybe not eat the sewing threads djjdjdj

[heliotroplsm]

My favorite part of EP 4 this week is when Gun was down as he had to leave his band, Tinn never overstepped his boundary or tried to solve the situation for him. Tinn offered his presence, listened to Gun’s story and overall just be a friend and lend him an ear for all his problems and worries. When it’s needed he nudged Gun back to his musical club, and because he knows how much he love his little musical club and his friends there. I know Tinn would love for Gun to stay in the council with them but he knows better that Gun doesn’t belong here and belongs on the stage with Chinzhilla.

Side note, I cannot hate any of the characters in this show, like none of them are inherently evil if you know what I mean. I know that Sound can be controlling and dictating but I know he also meant well and wanted good for the group but it was just the way he was doing it wasn’t right, but I’m glad Gun showed him what a good leader should be like. 

Also, can I just say the fact that all the boys raise their hands for Gun when they were voting for the leaders also got me teary in the eyes. The preview really make them looked like they were voting for Sound. I just love their little groups, they maybe morons and chaotic, but they are loyal and of the bestest groups of friends you can ever ask for. No wonder Gun love them so much and would do anything for them. 

#my school president #i swear it sounds better in my head #when i tried to explain something in words i cant get my wording right #but anyways i love tinn so much #tinngun #geminifourth #they have my whole heart #if i have more than one heart i would give them all

[glockhashira]

OH DID I TELL U GUYS ABOUT MY SILLY SELF INDULGENT AU WHERE GENYA SORTA BECOMES LIKE NEZUKO AFTER THE SWORDSMITH ARC

it's a very hyperspecific au but i call it 'Forever A Demon'

where genya can't go outside when it's sunny because he's permanently a demon. where he can sometimes have outbursts of anger or hunger or something that are completely uncontrollable. and kinda needs to go through the same treatment that season 1-2 nezuko did

and for personal mental health reasons genya and mui (and mitsu and obanai) survive the final battle with muzan

#IT SOUNDS BETTER IN MY HEAD #I SWEAR IM JUST AUTISTIC ABOUT GENYA ANS HIS RELATIONSHIP WITH THE OTHER CHARACTERS

[teddybearsims]

garden blues

#the sims 4 #sims 4 #ts4 #sims #s4 #simblr #sim: bear #hes so pinchable #when did his cheeks get so puffy I dont know #but I want to pinch #I swear he and august r constantly eating hot pot so #boy stuffing meat in his cheeks ig #sounded better in my head than typed out but o well #hes literally always unhappy when gardening but LOVES GARDENING? #he always wants to garden then pouts thru it #I think he just wants better quality weed #and dont we all #the sky was so prettyyy hereeee

[boomerang109]

spent my birthday money on replacing my loops cause somehow i lost them and this world is too loud

#i only just figured out i lost them yesterday and i wanted to wait a bit to see if i could find them #and then today every noise made me ANGERY #so I was like damn guess I need my loops #but I signed up for the one time student discount and got quiets and engage plus #and the ones I have from before are experience plus so even if I find them they’re technically different #one review of the engages said it’s better than the experiences cause it doesn’t make your chewing echo the way the experiences do and I’m #🙏🙏🙏really hoping that’s true cause by far that was my biggest complaint #like when you’re wearing both experience plus loops you want no noise no nothing and then you have to take ‘em out cause holy fuck it’s #making me own chewing echo in my head? those are the bad days lmao #but the engage plus doesn’t actually dampen as MUCH sound since it’s supposed to work better for being *engaged* so idk. could be good or #bad I’m not sure. we’ll find out #but that’s why I wanted to get the quiets too. Just in case #and hopefully my experiences will turn up and then I’ll just have ALL the earplugs #life of a boomerang #oh I just realized no where in this post did I use the word earplugs #if you’ve somehow made it this far and are still wondering what tf im talking about. loops are an earplug brand and my neurodiverse ass (and #many others. I’m not unique) swears by it

[jckeperalta]

did you know that i could be well-spoken and reserved and chill and so smart and so collected and so intimidating on here. but i choose to be fucking obnoxious and insufferable every single time. you're welcome

#i was like. why do other people sound like human beings in the tags. and im this annoying gremlin people are sick of. #and then i realised it's bc i choose to do it. bc that's what i sound like in my own head and i want out and i don't want to be alone there #so i pull y'all into this madness with me lmaoooo #which is werid bc i used to ALWAYS pose as someone soooooo much better on the internet/with strangers #tumblr rly brings out the worst in me. i swear im normal(er) irl. you wouldn't even notice #delete

[jesuswithoutchrist]

3am shit: deleting when I feel shame for it.

The sky seems a projection of the turmoil she feels. Of a deep dark blue it was meant for a clear canvas and yet, it hides behind clouds that the wind can barely move; A strange sighting on a summer night. The watch on her wrist reads 10 pm. The last time she saw it, it was 9:30 pm.

The last train left at 9.

There is a peaceful silence in the station. The man behind the counter was the first to leave, and the staff followed a little later. And as always, Robin Buckley is the last person in the place.

Dangerous shadows form in the trees across the tracks. Robin knows she should get up from that bench and make her way home, heat up yesterday's dinner, feed the stray cat that seems to have made a home in her yard, and get back to her life. Back to her day-to-day existence.

However, her feet don't seem to be willing to move.

In fact, for the past hour, her legs have been unresponsive, Numb. There is no existing impulse and she would like to be frightened by the unusual, but she is aware of the reason.

It's her mind, disconnected from her body.

The one that went to look for the heart that goes on that train wagon.

#writing #ronance #dumb shit #3 am writing #my head is pounding #robin buckley #english is not my first language #weird little thing you have folks #in spanish sound better i swear #if we past the grammatical error

[teethandclawsxx]

dick growing fast and early just like my boobs did the first time around. awesome 👍 /gen

#i think its like an inch 🤔 #not actually sure where to measure from but long enough that when its hard it sticks out. also pretty thick i think #i took a picture yesterday to check and was just like. 2 months ???? really ???? already ???????? #i also did some recording (singing) i really do think my voice is significantly lower.... #not just that i can hit lower notes but it has a quality to it. like it sounds like it believably could come out of a teenage boy #also ngl i wasnt really worried about t destroying my singing voice or smallening my range. #but i did NOT expect for it to like. HELP. i swear to god my voice wavers less now and just sounds BETTER #i havent sang in months so this isnt a result of hard work it just did that!! #2 months........ well today will be shot 10 i think #ALSO i think my hips are smaller. i keep feeling them up and they feel different to my hands. they dont look particularly different tho? #but i swear they feel thinner....... well not that i look at them often so i trust my hands on this one #idk if its all. in my head bc i feel like its too early for literally anything to be happening and i def havent noticed any hair growth #but the doc did say my t levels were like. unexpectedly high. in a good way. so #also back to the singing thing. i wonder if its just bc my throat muscles n shit are thicker ? like as for being able to hold notes better #and. i listened to the recording after i did some warmups and like. my first thought was oh my god. i sound so... TRANSGENDER. /pos

[pepprs]

hi mutuals. ive been gone all day in capstone hell in part bc my advisor is basically making me restructure the entire thing and it’s literally due on saturday. also if i look at a screen for another second my eyes will explode out of my face i think. like screens are so weird and 3d to me rn and it hurts my eyes and is too up close but also im pretty sure i have a lazy eye now so that’s probably why lol. but I have a week of this left at least atp except i can’t possibly ahve a week of this left because i literalt graduate a week from today. i feel like setting everything on fire

#purrs #what is it with me and my teachers / professors changing my entire project at the last minute LOL. throwback to ap art i. senior year of #high school when i was so fucking stressed out and depressed about graduating (hmmm sound familiar 🤔💕) and i had spent literally ALL YEAR do #doing my stupjd breadth and composition. or whatever it was like the names of the 2 stupid categories w head to do and i spent the whole yEA #year doing paintings for my compositon and i didn’t finish them bc i bit off more than i could chew (hmm sound familiar 🤔💕) and got permissi #permission from her to do my last like 3-4 paintings as collages in my sketchbook and then i had to give her mt sketchbook to like physicall #physically handle them and grade them (which was mortifying bc mt sketchbooks are like my diary basically) and after she gave it back she sa #sat me own and told me that she thought i had a better chance of getting a high score if in just used my sketchbook collages + some RANDOM #SKETCHBOOK PAGES that i had just been doing for fun and in my free time. instead of the paintings. thst i had spent all year fucking #murdering myself over. and iwas so angry but i went with it and i only got a 4 LMFAOOOOOOOO like this is just a repeat of that where he’s li #like you have to redo your entire fucking soi and break down everything etc etc and i swear to god i’ll get like a C. and at this point i do #don’t care. i almost broke down crying to him i was trying so hard to hold it together but i was telling him how i am worried about changing #so much of this right now not because I don’t care but because im exhausted and i DESPERATELY want and need to be done bc it’s been like #2 weeks of this at least. and he said nothing to that (in part bc i didn’t even look at him when i said it bc i was too embarrassed and bc i #said something else right after to lighten the mood bc i was too embarrassed) but like. lol still. this all sucks TREMENDOUSLY. i literally #am graduating in one week and it feels like i still have a month left and i have no fucking idea honwim gonna do this bc the stupid paper i #have been trying to write for the last 2 days he basically told me i have to redo in its entirety AND THE THING IS ITS 10 FUCKING PERCENT OF #MY ETIRE GRADE LKKE THIS IS SO STUPID HELPPPPPPPPPPPP help. this is so stupid and my faculty mentors can’t help me and im like ok maybe i ai #will go lie in the street right now. also not counting seeing glimpses of my roommates i haven’t been around another human being in person I #in a week and 2 days and ive only left my room 3 #3x in that time span too all to go like take out the trash or some shit. so im absolutely done with everything LOL there is no way this #project is happening and i want to just dump the entire thing unfinished and say please just take it i can’t do it anymore i literally can’t #him: don’t even worry about the time rn. just pretend you have infinite time. me: crying cat meme. LIKE SIR I WOULD LIKE TO BE DONE THIS #VERY INSTANT! HAVE I NOT SUFFERED ENOUGH!!!!!!! HAVE I NOT SUFFERED ENOUGH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! it’s the way i have literally created THREE #fucking collections of literature in the course of doing this project and it still isn’t good enough LOLLL like i appreciate you trying to h #help me do well and give me time etc bu you have to understand i need to be done with undergrad right this second or i will explode

[saetoru]

who gave me permission to write the words i did like a year ago

#i certainly wrote.....things #and to think some of u read it ?? and followed me ??? my writing is like the equivalent of that one pic of a dude u show ur friends #hes holding a fish and his hair is cut and he's smiling weird #and ur like i swear hes cuter in person #thats like #what my writing sounds like #''i swear it sounded better in my head''

[cpirits]

(( @chxmpionofjustice said: [ "Mamo-chan?" Usagi's voice was a whisper even though it was just the two of them and she didn't have to worry about waking Chibi-Usa up anymore. She was close to him, but tucked herself even closer and rested her head against his chest as she shifted the sheets so nothing was trapped between them, "Do you... dream about it now and then? Our past?" ( @ mamoru C: ) ]

UNPROMPTED ASKS // accepting

〜 多くの魂 ——— As she rested against his chest, her body cuddled close so he could feel her nightgown she wore, Mamoru hummed to himself. They weren't trapped by the constant threat of evil lurking in the city to combat, and they could live their lives easy as most. Though their past as members of the Silver Millennium, it often crossed his mind, as they had even encountered those visages in the fight to save those that they loved. Though that was who he had been in the past, and who he was now had nothing to do with t, no matter how lovely it may have seemed--it wasn't as if they could relive something they barely remembered...

〜 多くの魂 ——— An arm shifted as he cuddled her body in his warming embrace, giving the crown of her head a gentle kiss. "I did at one time, but we have our own lives to live now." He looked down at her, arching his neck and found a hand under the sheets, taking her fingers and squeezing. "We owe everything to those that we were in the past, as we'd have never found each other here if not for who we were..."

#mind: Tuxedo Kamen ( draped in black ) #( ships: mamoru & usagi ) #( chxmpionofjustice // usagi ) #chxmpionofjustice #(( i swear this sounded better in my head )) #『 beep beep on the coil // asks 』 #『 a wistful dream // threads 』