#i think about it eveyday

[thebonejunky]

it fills me with such righteous anger thinking about harrow going to The Mithraeum and seeing God indulge in all of the things she has been deprived of/deprived herself of all her life- in order to worship HIM. seeing him and the other lyctors have feasts while even tea is too flavorful for her. seeing them have gross old people orgies while she had probably never been hugged in her entire life before Gideon. seeing them do jackshit all day while she did nothing but pray and study. telling her she is but a baby- despite the fact that she has experienced the worst of horrors(at the hands of the religion they created) and posseses more necromantic power than all of them. her fellow saints taking advantage of her schizophrenia for their own agendas, and never giving her the time of day otherwise, not even pity when she is lying on the ground with her gut ripped open and innards strewn about. god saying she is like a daughter to him- and her throwing herself down onto broken glass because she is so overcome by guilt at the idea of being a daughter- of being given anything, of having anything, of having love or affection, of being something to somebody, of existing- and god having the audacity to say such a thing after failing to raise her. god not understanding her, god's lack of omnipresence, the saint's lack of kindness or holiness of any capacity. harrow, having grown up in nothing but dark black halls and clothes- and The Mithraeum being nothing but pearly white. harrow, who dedicated her life to an empty religion and a god who does not care and is not qualified. harrow, who only had ONE thing(Gideon) that ever made her happy, and having that one thing taken away from her by this god. so much avoidable grief and abuse forced onto her. and the fact that she has been forced to continue this cycle of grief and abuse as well by having had continuously hurt her only friend and being turned into a lyctor against her will. harrow begging god to ask the saint of duty to stop trying to brutally murder her, and god telling her to get a hobby? devastating. truly the most tragic character of all time

#i have NEVER felt so much sadness for a fictional character #i am so sad and this is just a stream of conciousness #htn was such an incredibly devastating book to me that was really just a compilation of harrows eternal suffering #i think about it eveyday #the locked tomb #tlt #harrow the ninth #harrowhark nonagesimus

[akabendyfan]

top 5 characters of all time, ever, from anything???? (from published media ONLY. your oc or your friend's oc are not allowed)

1 PAPYRUS!!!! obviously!!!!

2 TOBI!!!!

dont mind deidara idk how he got there

3 DEADPOOL!!!

no picture available:((

4 MARVIN THE MARTIAN!!!!!

5 ermmm ICEKING!!!!

no picture available:((((

#taking top characters to mean the most AWESOME characters that i think about eveyday #hi guys #heaty weaty

[smoresie]

I love how my top two posts are about rian x undertaker

Anyways we endorse underrian here (toxic yaoi icons I mean just look at the musical)

#i think about fays vid about it eveyday cause theyre right #these two are just gay #if i was the writer i wouldve made them kiss #the love was real but everything else was a lie #and now rian will never know peace again

[transmascnepetaleijon]

#why do i always get post party depression why why why why #its *only* when its a dance party. only when. ugh. #im sad now its 1am i need a shower i dont know if the sandwich i just ate was filling and im thinking about the SAME fucking thing ive been #ALWAYS eveyday overthinking and i feel like shit. which sucks bc today was great. #txt

[the-moon-dealer]

Ignore it.

#friends #its sad lol #everyone has someone that will be there for them #like im this person to some people but weirdly i dont have anyone be there for me lol #i have a person who cares but thats all #not like I'll have someone to go back to #i dont really have a family and lately my number is getting lower and lower #i feel like its my fault for being the way i am #like i was talking to a random person and they said they love the way their mom wakes them up #and how their family makes everything they can to be with them and how their friends are alwys there #and that got me because since November i felt that three of the most important people in my life just put me aside lol #im not asking for attention or to talk to me 24/7 but i felt that we're not so close anymore and the reason is unknown #and by losing them im actually feeling less and less need to reach out other people #and this put me in a place where i hate so much #because i go and isolate myself from everyone and everything else and hyperfocus on anything im doing #my new class starts next week and its making me anxious because with everyone being distant like that #i know ill just focus on the class and forget im a human lol and it's bad #plus also has other shit that is in my head and its actually making me think about killing myself #you have any idea of how fucked up it is? #i don't want to die but eveyday since 2004 has been a nightmare #ist almot 20 years of suffering lol #well im tired of it all #wont bother anyone with this shit because its my shit #but i really hope all my friends and family be good

[the-perfect-g1rl]

How to transform your life

It is very very easy to change your life. There are so many posts about how to do so. You have no excuses and if you truly wish to level up then you must start with your mindset.

Envision the person you want to be and write down their qualities. Then you will know the kind of activities your ideal person partakes in, the kind of people they surround themselves with and the kind of energy and language they allow themselves to be exposed to.

Personally I have stopped listening to sad music about staying inside and not doing anything. This has transformed my life. I make sure I am productive and get something I want to get done EVERYDAY!! Yes it can be draining but at the end of the day I have accomplished something I set out to do and feel so much better and more confident about myself. And on slow days something as simple as doing my own nails is productive (because we all know looking put together all the time makes people take you more seriously and admire you more)

Affirming and taking all the bad and negative thoughts about yourself and switching them into something positive also helps. But if you do not do the necessary work to prove to yourself and your subconscious that you are not that negative thought, it will come back eventually. The goal is to get rid of it completely. Everyday you must DO SOMETHING, get up and actually do something that affirms and confirms that you are your ideal self. For example working out, reading, drinking enough water, staying away from unhealthy foods and people, helping someone in need, praying etc. It is easier said than done but you only need to do it once eveyday and build up from there.

Become obsessed with making yourself a better person. The only cons i can think of are the people you leave behind to upgrade your life and criticism from others who can't do it like you do. Bettering yourself only leads to an upgrade of life experiences and new hardships that only the best can face.

This is a summary of what was in the article I linked in my previous post. It is more detailed and more helpful than my summary so i suggest you read it :)

#affirmations #manifestation #law of assumption #manifesting #desired self #law of abundance #neville goddard #law of attraction #desired reality #self concept #level up #glow up #girlhood

[diedandgone]

Am going to be homeless sooon but my friend is taken me in

Now my issue is she is a big girl and she says am to skinny allll the time ! (Low key sick of hearing it now my bmi is normal leave me alone)

I just know she's going to foruse feed me shit 😒 am actually so anxious about this .

I like living alone to much first of all this is going to be a big change .

Wish me luck 🙏

And any tips would be appreciated

I will only eat infront of here , especially when having a binge!

I will allways say I had food at work (when I don't lol)

I will eat slow and mess with the food or spit it in tussie to make it seem I had more .

And I will never let her see me naked ! (She says my bones are showing too much so she can never see me fully naked )

I know I shouldn't complain especially because she's taken me in her home and is more then happy tooo but I can't help but freak outttttt .

Not to mention alll the foods in the home , I have gotten used to not having much in and especially no junk so this is going to be hard .

I think am over my iddiction to chocolate but I reallllly don't want it looking back at me eveyday 😭😭😭😭😭😭.

I hate this 😒

I need to save money and get my own litte place 😩 I like being alone way to much, low key hate ppl . Somedays I hate being in my own skin nm having others around alllll the time .

I might lose my mind u alll ♡

Ps I know she means we'll and I know I should be very grearfull and I rralllly am ♡

Just very nervous about this and I hate change so much !

#light as a 🪶 #tw ed but not sheeran #th1gh g@p #thinspø #th1nsp1ration #ana buddie #low cal diet #e@tingdisorder #my ed thoughts

[aalyssah]

Drunk and Tired

Parring: ‘Hangman’ Adam Page x Reader

Warning: Fluff.

Word Count: 1,402

Summary: You and Adam celebrate after having amazing matches and end up cuddling. You two just want to be in each others embraces so you fall asleep.

A/N: It wasn’t supposed to be this long but hope you Enjoy!

You and Adam had great matches tonight. Adam just won the Casino Ladder Match and you were happy for him. Although your match wasn’t as important but it helped you move to rank number 4 in the women’s division so you both achieved something special and how do you two celebrate?

Beer.

What better way to celebrate than beer? Drinking an ice cold beer or even shots of Vodka or Tequila. You two decided to meet up in the parking lot after taking a shower and getting your bags ready. You were currently walking to the parking lot with your bags on your shoulder.

As you stood there waiting for Adam you scrolled through Twitter and saw how many retweeted about Adam winning the Ladder Match and how Moxley should of won but you didn't care because guess who walked out with the chip in his hand?

HANGMAN ADAM PAGE!

You smiled as you read all the comments on how people were arguing over who was better. You didn't even realize Adam standing next to you. "You ready?" His voice made you jump. "Gosh, Adam! You scared me!" You said holding your hand on you chest.

Adam laughed and it made you get butterflies. You and Adam have been friends for a very long time and you've always had feelings for him but tried brushing it off because of you're careers. He was getting popular as he came in AEW and you were slowly rising to the top and knowing Tony, he would probably put y'all in a storyline against Sammy Guevara and Tay Conti or something.

It's not that you don't want to date Adam but you feel like he's into his career and not looking for a relationship. When Dark Order member's try setting him up on dates he would say he's not 'Looking for someone right now.' He said it everytime, so he would most likely say that to you.

"Y/n? You ok?" Adam broke you out of your thoughts. "Yea I'm fine and I'm ready." You we're kind of happy because you could hear the concern in his voice, showing that he cared about you. "Ok let's go." You two happily made your way to his truck and he opened the trunk.

He put his bags in the trunk and watched as you tried lifting yours up. "No. You don't do that go get in the car." He pushed you near the passengers side and grabbed the bags of your hand and placed them in the trunk.

You didn't stop the smile from forming in your face at how a gentleman he was being. As Adam got in the car he saw the smile on your face. "What's got you smiling like that?" He started up the car and began to drive. "Just thinking about you.”

You weren’t gonna hide anything other than your feeling from Adam. “Good or bad?” He looked over at you. “All good.” Silence filled the car as the low volume of the radio playing. “I saw your match.” Adam said breaking the silence. “You did? How did I do?” You two would always give feedbacks on how y’all did in matches.

“Great but the only thing you need to do is watch the knees when doing you’re frog splash.” You nodded your head, taking notes as he told you what was wrong. You pulled in the bar and Adam parked the car.

“You ready to celebrate?” He unblocked his seat belt. “Yup but make sure you don’t drink so much. I don’t wanna drive.” Adam laughed and rolled his eyes. “Darling do you not know who I am?” Darling. When he called you that it made you wish he would call you that eveyday.

Shaking your head you unbuckled your seat belt and walked to the door. As you and Adam stepped a foot inside you saw all the people dancing, singing karaoke, drinking, eat, and all. You and Adam went to a table in the corner.

“Drinks on me!” Adam said before you even sat down. You couldn’t argue because you knew he wouldn’t give up until he paid. “Fine but next time I got it.” Adam laughed loud. “Sure we’ll see.” A waiter came over. “Hey Adam and Y/n what can I get y’all?” Adam was at the bar so many times the workers knew who he was and what he liked.

You didn’t go often but they knew you because Adam talked about you. (But you didn’t need to know that.) “Yea just some Beer for us.” Adam wanted to start off easy and not go straight to liquor. The waiter Joey went back to get the beer. “Your match was amazing! I was hoping you would win.” You stared off a conversation.

“Oh yeah? You we’re rooting for me and not Moxley?” He sounded a little surprise. You loved Jon, especially when he was Dean Ambrose so when you saw Adam vs Jon last, you were on the edge of your chair. “Of course I was but you are my best friend. You’ve been there for me in ways Moxley could never.”

Adam smiled at that statement. “Here are your drinks.” Joey came with 4 beers. He knew better than to just give Adam 1. Whatever you wouldn’t drink Adam would finish. “Thanks Joe.” Joey nodded and walked off to another table.

You took a sip of the beer and hmmed. Meanwhile, Adam took gulps after gulped and next thing you knew, it was all gone. “Damn Adam!” You giggled. “What? I love beer!” Judging by the way he drunk that he doesn’t have to tell you.

You two sat there watching people do karaoke and evening clapping when someone actually sounded sober. You drink half of your first drink and felt like you had to pee. “Imma go to the bathroom.” You got up and went to the bathroom.

You did your business and washed your hands. You walked back to the table and was surprised to see Your beer gone. “Adam why? I was gonna drink that!” You whined, sitting down. “I’m sorry it was just staring at me, begging me to drink them.” You couldn’t even be mad at him.

“I’ll buy you some later but now we’ve drink 4 beers so it’s time for a little liquor.” Yeah ‘we’ve’ drunk 4. You barley got 1 down. Adam called for Joey and he came. “Can you get us 2 shots of Hennessy and Vodka? Only fill it half way though.” Of course he chooses those type drinks. You hope he could still drive after done with those.

Joey disappeared again and came back with the shots. Adam handed them to you. “Cheers to winning our matches.” Adam toasted while clinging your glasses together. “Cheers.” You smiled while drinking it. Your smile was dropped off your face when tasting the strong drink.

Adam gulped it down without any other drink. “Drink it all.” You shook your head. It was just too strong for you to handle. “Come on, if your drink that one we can go home.” It was getting a little late and you we’re a little tired so you drunk it all in one swing. You coughed as the burning sensation went down your throat.

Adam drunk the rest of the drinks and left money on the table. He took your hand and guided you through the crowd of dancing people. You two made it outside and entered the car. You both were sober enough to drive so Adam started driving to his house.

It wasn’t far from the bar so it didn’t take but 10 minutes. As you pulled through the driveway you were fighting sleep. You heard Adam’s door open and close. Your door opened and you felt arms wrap around you. “Come on Y/n.” Adam mumbled, carrying you bridal style to the door.

Adam opened the door and kicked it with his feet and made his way to his bedroom. He took off your shirt and jeans and his jeans knowing you would never sleep in jeans. You slowly went under the covers and cuddled up in Adams side.

You wish every day could be like this but you didn’t care. All you cared about was you and Adam cuddling.

#aew smut #aew imagine #aew fluff #adam page #adam page x reader #adam page fanfiction #adam page imagine #adam page smut #hangman adam page #hangman adam page smut #hangman adam page x reader #hangman adam page fanfic #hangman adam page imagine

[screwnames-ihatenames]

Being an artist is amazing cause now whenever I see any form of art is any shape or form I think o myself “someone took days maybe years of their life to make that just for it to be treated like anything else” and now I have to silently appreciate it every building poster statue etc CAUSE NOW I HAVE TO THINK ABOUT THE PERSON DESPITE THE FACT I DONT EVEN CARE ABOUT PEOPLE I SEE EVEYDAY AT SCHOOL THESE FUCKS I HAVE NEVER SEEN BEFORE ARE GETTING MY SILENT GRATITUDE CAUSE THEY DESERVE IT

#I have no clue how I’m so low empathy and yet so high empathy #there is no middle ground #but I just HAVE TO APPRECIATE IT #CAUSE I DOOOOOOO #ARRRRG

[whoreforlarrystuff]

I understand you might get these asks eveyday, its ok if you don't want to answer if you've done it dozens of times. But if you do, do you think HL are still together? It's been 2 years since I've joined fandom.. initially when I watched all the videos and joined twitter, it felt like they were still together.. but these days I've seen more and more people becoming neutral or who think there was definitely something going on between them in the past but are definitely not together anymore.. and am starting to accept that too.. I mean harry with B everywhere, singing songs to him(I've seen couple of videos) and B making sure place dropping everywhere he is being with H and H has not indicated anything that he is with L anymore.. I mean he doesn't have to share with us but he did that with performances like sweet creature.. how I wish I was here during that period..though I've seen louis mentioning H more than ever may be his album being out and obvious he would be asked about 1D but even on the movie, teasers or spotify canvases he added H way too much... but main question is HL being together, how does that work??

Hi!

When you say B- do you mean his trainer? I haven't seen videos of him singing to him. We know Harry is involved with Marvel- and he's been seeming more and more in "Marvel" movie shape again lately- it wouldn't surprise me if the trainer is in part because of the training for the movie!

I do think Louis and Harry are still together- we get proof from both H and Lou. Just look at the Satellite music video- putting the constellations for both Aquarius and Capricorn in the sky?

I think sometimes, being constantly "online" and seeing everyone freak out as much as they all do, can cause you to question. It's super easy to spiral- just like it's super easy to clown, when others are doing it.

Like with clowning, I tend to just take all of it with a large grain of salt.

If you look at H and L's tour schedules, we know that there were lots of periods of times where it lined up for them to have time off to be together, (that famous 2 week time period came into play alot....)

Harry and Louis are grown adults, who are very busy with their careers, and have likely worked out a good balance for the two of them.

They don't "owe" us anything in regards to making statements about being if they are together or not.

#louis tomlinson #harry styles #larry stylinson #larry #larry is real

[tunapesto]

Eveyday ithink about you and every Day.every single one. I am so happy for your mind and your hands. You are able to transmit some of my deep minded ideas, stuck in the realms of my cells and transform them into art. You have so much talent and so much beauty and i felt the need to say it to you once again.

I hope nothing but the best for you ily <3

WAHH... (this is charlie I will hope . just to be sure) I LOVE U TOO .. this was said in such a sweet and articulate way I'm genuinely touched. sometimes I feel down about my work but then it's people like you that completely change my mind about it... thank you so much!!! I am glad we met and became friends too, I deeply appreciate your support for the time I've known you and I think you're so cool...

#mail #Thank you friend... you are so swag...

[lunarain0918]

Falling hard for people you've never met

Specifically made this account for my over thinking lol. Okay so 3 years I met two amazing people. To say that they changed my life is kinda an understatement, which does sound stupid. So first lets start with boy 1. boy 1 and boy 2 where bestfriends. I dont rallly remember how they met its whatevs. so me and boy 1 got really close and we texted eachother for about a year every single day. I mean there was not one second we werent talking. I never really got close to boy 2 which i knew he had some weird atraction towards me. I was also really young and naive and would let every remark that they said towards me slide. Like bro i was so blinded at it, when i first turned 19 i forgot about them somehwhat. i would still think about them from time to time. But when i first got to college i made the smartest decision to delete both of them days after they contacted me first. Now a couplde months later, i get a notification that boy 2 added me. my dumbass added him back then i think we talked for like 1 day and went back to no contact. After i turned 20 i noticed him starting to watch all my socials all the time and i wanted to text him to catch up but it was NOT worth it, so i didnt. Couple months later, i am back in college and i made the stupid decision to add boy 1 on social, which again was stupid but i did. This was like the day before spring break and me and my friend decided to be stupid that night and like stalk literally everyone and their baby mommas swear. We honestly could be like secret spys or something my god. Anyways the day of springbreak i unadded him because he didnt accept it. BLAH BLAH BLAh. anyways again one night with me and said friend i decided to text boy 2 and of course they are bestfriends so he texted boy 1 so he added me back. Also sorry if i sound incompetent in some sentences i am very gone. Anyways me and boy 2 text eveyday ish, then it started getting slower and slower and i remember getting mad at myself because i am letting this happen AGAIN sam situation different friend. Let me also explain me and boy 1 relationship was so confusing towards me because we didnt act like friends but less than a relationship typa deal. There are so many things i just now learned, three years later about boy 2 and it scared me and i told myself not to do the same shit again but i did lmao, no surprise and i hate myself for that. I tried excusing their behavor at certain time towards me, but there is only a certain limit your body can handle. It was weird that my body knew what was going to happen before i actually knew until that moment. In life your always going to meet people, and you really dont know if they are considered a lesson to teach you something, ot if they are going to be in your life completely. Which sucks because im impatiant and i always end up getting hurt. I finally started standing up for myself and not scared to speak up for myself. Thats new for me, people cant walk all over me anymore and ive never felt so alone. Let me expalin that. When you start actually saying something and people finally realize that youll sya something back is when they leave. They no longer have that power over you and they know that. I feel alone not lonely, better to not deal with people actions and not allow yourself to feel like that again. I devoted 3 years of my life towards them and im never allowing myself to be in an relationship or friendship, or whatever the fuck that was that constitely leaves me confused after every conversation. Im a new adult and i never want to go through that again, but once again i ahve a whole life ahead of me that its really inevetable, which sucks but character developemtn i guess. I do want to say that for both of them this is an apology for not meeting yall later on and not when i was so young. I think thats what kinda ruined in but i cant change anything about that. I dont regret that we met im actually glad i expirienced that with the both of them, but i think its time to move on. I say that but i know if they both texted me right now i would respond in an instant.

[xxth3crypt1c-k1d5xx]

TW-Direct mentions of neurodivergence and mental illness and indirect mentions of suicide, dysphoria, and depersonalization

I have alway been a good performer ever since I was little. I am cripplingly shy and socailly akward but put me on a stage and I can go in front of a hundreds of people and give a great performace no problem. But I tend to think that my perfomace skills strech past theater into my eveyday life and thats where I personally think I shine. The perfomace of normalcy and femininity. I didnt always put on this perfromace but I learned at a very young age that it was the best way for me to survive

So I learned how to make eye contact and speak with the correct intonation. I learned that I had to give people hugs even if I didnt want to and that it was bad to move my hands around and make "weird noises". Basically I learned how to mask, just like many other autistic chidlren did. Becasue I started doing this from such a young age and with no real undrstanding of why (except that people liked me more)it would be years before my autism was ever acknowledged by any medical professonal. But it was more than just masking I pushed down and suffocated every little thing that could be ever percived as weird or abnormal by others. I was so terrified of rejection that for years I pretended to be a complety different person. This made performace somthing I had once loved absolutely exhasting I felt completly and utterly suffocated. And after a years of this I often began to wonder if I was real or not. I would go into fits of panic and I would often spend days compelty detactched from myself. When I was around 13 I ended up having to be hospitalized for other medical issues and I reached a point where I felt completly and totally removed from reality.I had no intrests no hobbys nothing that I ernenslty enjoyed or looked foward to. I genuinelly had no idea who I was

But this also lead to a period of near comeplte isoaltion for me. I wasnt around anyone and so there was no one to hide from, and one day I found alternative rock. I found music that I related to on such a deep and personal level and it was the first thing in years that I actually allowed myslef to enjoy. I didnt feel like I had to hide the fact that I loved this music and I started finding other things like tv shows and fashion that I genuinely loved .

Eventally it lead me to finding online communities and places like tumblr. And insted of suffocating and pushing down all the parts of me that i was scared people would reject I felt like they had a place to live. Now I didnt stop masking in my everyday life, but I had a place to be myself. I felt likeI had split myself right down the middle there was the socially acceptable half of me that Iet people see and the was the weird loud ernest part of me who openly talked about their struggles who got to exsist in the online void. But I still felt trapped, even though I had found this outlet I still had this emense feeling that something trult wasnt correct. I still felt these intese wave of disconnection from my body. Perfroming was still somthing so difficult to me and I would watch these musician perform and feel these pangs of jealousy that I couldn't ever put my finger on. That was until I relized I was trans nonbinary, and that relization put so many things in order for me. I had gone by Carter online for years and I had always told myself it was for internet privacy but I think deep down there was always somthing more there. Now coming to this relization didnt necessarily "fix" anything for me but it did provide context for what felt like my who life. It allowed me to begin enjoying performace again as I felt I could explore both extreamly hyper masculine roles and still perfrom femininity when I was required to

Eventually these two parts of me began to merge together more and more. I noticed I began dressing in a style that I enjoyed more and more I was more open to people knew in real life about my intrests. Most of my friends refer to me as Carter now. But I wont pretend that I dont still struggle. I often still struggle with feeling like the "real me" and there are issues that are never going going to leave me no matter how much I try. And the lack of seperation between who I am online and who I am in real life is somthing that can be difficult to manage especially after having them be so seprate for so many years.

And I cant act as if the the person I have "pretended" to be isnt real in many ways as well "Sophia" is the perosn that I outwardly presented as for 18 years and they are in no ways a complete fabrication. I am that person in more ways then maybe I want to accept. It's why I am not very picky about how people refer to me. I have exisited as Sophia for so many years and although I do perfer the name Carter I'm not made uncomfortable by either name. I also have to acknowledge that there is a stratigic aspect in how I present and the fact that I actively continue to mask in most situations. I am aware of the immese ammount of privillage that I am granted when I am percived by others as a white cisgender neurotypical woman. There is also familiarity with being percived that way even though it is dishonest and does cause me discomfort. I am still trying to figure out who the "real me is" if that person even exsists.

#Youtube

[smileeverydayfor2reasons]

I'm gonna try my best to express myself okay? Don't be mad please sweetie

My world changed when I met you. You looked at me like I was more then I was at the time and you made me feel like I was finally enough. You're the light that guides me when I'm lost. Your love has given me more than I could'e ever thought: You were the reason I got my laugh back. The reason I fell asleep for so long with a smile on my face. The reason why problems didn't seem so bad at all. I have to be honest with you. I think about you. A lot. All the time actually, In the morning, at night in the midlle of the day. It's you. It has been always you. No matter how much we talk to each other eveyday, I'll never get bored of you. I smile instantly every time I get a text, call, or picture from you. You make my days better and It amazes me to know I'm in your mind for the past 8 years too. I want to hug you so tight, I miss my nalla and shellan so much.

You know what? Sometimes I just sit there and imagine all the little scenarios of us in my head. Been able to kiss you, hold your hands and confort you when you are sad. Be there, not miss a single conversation, ear you laugh and see you smile. Taking random trips to places that we don't know. Cuddle while watching a movie and sing with you even if we are really bad. Bringing you closer to me and finally sleep holding you

My emotions are overwhelming me, impregnating every aspect of my being. It only took a split second before I realized that I might have been in love with you. Our daily conversations and shared laughter can't be ignored, and it feels like we were preparing for something more .The voices in my head finally stop screaming. Love found me when I least expected it, and when I gaze into your eyes, everytime I see volumes of unspoken words.

You know the difference of a hero and a villain? A hero would sacrifice you for the world. While a villain would sacrifice the world for you. And trust me when i say I'm no hero.

When you asked about how my perfect day would be, I described watching the sky turn into the moon while eating sushi from a familiar hilltop with you by my side.The hours would pass slowly, and we would never run out of time. We would recite our favorite quotes and rewrite our thoughts so that they could rhyme. We would enjoy a big breakfast, more like a brunch, filled with orange juice, strawberries, and butter toast with crust. Then we would walk hand in hand to a well-stocked bookstore downtown, where we would buy too many novels and carry them like a crown. We would drive with the windows down, your shoes dropped on the car floor, and I would feel fulfilled looking at the passenger seat. I would sing softly to the sky, and in that moment, you would fall in love with me a little more. The sheets on my skin that I've missing for years would appear. When you asked me how the day would end, I would only tell you that you would have to wait and see. In reality, my perfect day would end up with you marrying me.

I am struggling to find the right words to express the depth of my emotions. When I look at you, I feel like I should fall to my knees and pray, because there's no other way. You make me believe in miracles, but even that does not fully capture the extent of your impact on me. You are sunshine incarnate, and you make everything seem less difficult but easy. I want to write full novels about your smile, but words fail me as I try. You are a core memory of joy, the person of my dreams, and my love for you is bursting at the seams and sometimes even brings me to tears. 8 years ago I saw you for the very first time. The first glance made me speachless and to be the most honest that I can be, 8 years of speachness it's the least I can provide I want every year of every lifetime we have.

I love loving you. You made something that felt so damned, something so damn fun! You make the messy nature of such an intense-emotion something to savour and celebrate. You make the hard discussions feel worth it because I know that we respect eachother enough to not tamper with wounds we both entered with. You made morning breath seem not all that bad. You make my insecurities fade away when I catch you looking at me as if you just met me yesterday, it's was if every morning you were seeing me for the first time. I cant lie, I go through the day unfazed by how others see me because in a world full of madness there is you. You make me realise that whatever I had accepted before was never love in its purest form. It was lazy, neither compassionate or kind, neither gentle nor preserving of mind. It was a mismatch of souls. But you. You make love the most exciting thing I have ever experienced and for that I am forever grateful for loving you. And being loved by you

Thank you for 8 years, I really love you my pyrocant

[babygirlyusuf]

eveyday i think about her (le creuset heartshaped cookware)

#pspsppsing av #also i found out the skillet is a lot cheaper and im SO tempted to get it #that pink cocotte has my heart tho . she is like a wife to me #shini.txt

[erin-bo-berin]

I lost my cat that I love more than anything soon 4 months ago and I still cry eveyday..like right now I should be asleep but my heart is bleeding, I miss him so much..The only thing that brings me a little comfort is the imagine how Steve would be there and not think it's silly, or just a cat..He would hold one and do anything to make one feel better 😭💔 Why isn't he real 🥲

Oh no I’m so sorry about the loss of your kitty 😞 pet grief is a real thing and I know it can’t be easy. Don’t be hard on yourself because it’s a huge loss and change that you have to process just as much as if it were a person that died. It’s completely acceptable for you to still be mourning. I don’t know what I’d do if I lost my Hoppy, my heart breaks enough to even imagine what you’re going through. Give yourself a break and allow yourself to grieve and work your way through it. I hope the pain lessens over time, even though he will always be a part of you 💕

Steve would definitely be there for you as you mourn. He would hug you and let you cry and talk about happy moments and even try to make you smile with funny stories about your cat. Steve—much like Joe seems—truly is boyfriend material. 🥰