#i tried a new workflow this time

[phyriaxi]

I know this is specific but can you draw Fiametta in a corset? I think her Angel gf’s would dress her up nice. Lemuen especially :3

a Fiammetta for you! two color versions because i'm indecisive... :P

[ thank you for the request! ]

#sorry for taking like an entire year to get around to this LOL #my art #illustration #fanart #arknights #fiammetta #digital art #artists on tumblr #イラスト #フィアメッタ #アークナイツ #明日方舟 #csp #clip studio #i tried a new workflow this time #i liked the way it felt but it was also really easy for me to accidentally over-render #so if i try it again i'll definitely keep an eye on that ... #i've also never drawn a corset before...! cool clothing is a weak point for me... so it was good and fun practice :D

[cdlum]

I just wanted to say I think your art style is awesome! I was wondering if you had any tutorials on how you draw anatomy in your style (hips and legs especially)? Sorry if there's already one posted and I just didn't see it 🥲. Happy New Year :>

thanks for the kind words. i tend to draw people pretty stylized and then some so a good bit of artistic licence gets used. these tips are just what i use so feel free to take them with a grain of salt. with anatomy in particular you can kind of talk in circles because human/animal bodies are that complex so ill just zone in on the points you specified. here's a little image with a bunch of pointers:

the above image condenses a lot of the points I'd make, but basically the key parts are to start with the bare essentials and build up that complexity. using a line of action is a good way to get a quick, rough start. you draw a line out in the general direction of the pose and do your best to adhere to it to give the pose a sense of flow.

you can also draw smaller, thumbnail versions that throw a lot of caution to the wind but capture the basic energy of what you're going for. even having a tiny little stick figure version of your idea can make for a good guideline of where to take it forward.

when it comes to actual limbs, you wanna consider how they integrate and work together, kind of like how chains do. you can see on some of the parts of pear i've drawn out these wireframes to kind of portray how the mass of her legs works in a three dimensional space. for aspects like the waist/hips, i use that X technique i highlight above a lot, particularly for the lower torso. a lot of the times, even when drawing a character totally naked, imagining them wearing things like skintight underwear can help a lot to guide you in the right direction.

its also a good idea to consider things like gravity and weight to a degree. humans are essentially big meat sacks and gravity is always pulling down on that, but theres all kinds of aspects that effect that, such as character build or clothing. pear technically isn't naked in this, but i've tried to imagine her as such and take that into account.

if you are drawing digitally, don't be afraid to take advantage of the convenience you get with that workflow. you can retry and iterate on things a lot faster that pen and paper, and do things that aren't really feasible at all when it comes to editing and modifying your existing work. things like resizing certain bodyparts, instantly flipping the canvas, or using selection tools to completely adjust the positions of parts of your drawing. to give you an example heres a timelapse with all the little edits i made just to this demo drawing:

you don't have to use these techniques linearly, either. sometimes ill have a really solid idea for a piece in my head, and go back to basics with certain elements if they’re not coming out right or i just want to brush them up a bit more. some of the tutorial-y parts i added in i didn't actually use during the drawing but often do use so they're there just for demonstration. not every drawing i do starts as building blocks or a really basic version, often ill just start with a face and build it out from there.

i always encourage liberally using references (this can include yourself) and trying out stuff like life drawing or looking at things like existing photographs of real people/places/things if you can, the more you use learning material the better you'll draw up a mental inventory in your head that you can rely on more and more. some of these tips are things i've learned from other artists over the years (the chin one especially i remember seeing a tutorial about lol), so this is a lot of knowledge i've amassed from other sources over time myself. there are plenty of times ill use all sorts of reference material and its all in service of arriving at the final destination as smoothly as possible. learn by doing, as they say. hope this helps!

#tutorial #2024

[thebibliosphere]

Um, Joy, hi. I hesitate to ask, but what is a Phangs arc request and why are you getting so many that you can make them a pile out of 700+ emails??? Do you want, like, a banner or something that says "can't answer these!" because I know how to make one.

Phangs arc requests are when I give copies out in exchange for reviews or from the “donate” pile people regularly contribute to via my Payhip.

And lol, thank you. I appreciate that. I’m spending today and tomorrow looking at my workflow and setting up tighter filters on my email to hopefully catch more things.

The arcs are honestly fine. It's the people deliberately censoring words to get around my autofilters that are the biggest problem.

The abuse I just kind of eyeroll at. It’s really quite ridiculous seeing someone tell you to “un@l!ve” yourself or calling me a “m*nchi3”. But it really wears me down when it’s people doing it with health queries.

Some people really don’t like getting my generic “here are some MCAS resources” email and go out of their way to make sure they get my individual attention, even though what they’re asking is answered in the links I provide.

I’m sure it pisses them off no end when I reply to their c3ns0red emails with the same copy-paste response they just got, but hey, if you’re not going to read the things I put time and energy into curating and then send your email again with keywords filtered so my autoresponder can’t catch it, I don’t much care. I feel bad for you, but I will guard my limited time and energy. (and going forward anyone doing that will just get blocked)

Also, most of the time I’m not qualified to do what they want. I can’t diagnose anyone or tell them what meds to take. I’m just a sick bitch sharing the resources I spent literal years curating to try and make things easier for others.

(covid absolutely made this 100% worse. I’ve got so many people reaching out because unlike a few other well known MCAS bloggers I don’t charge for my time or push supplements via my website. I’ll tell you what supplements I use, but I don’t profit from it. Legally, I can’t, but it also just feels a bit morally icky.)

Hopefully when I get around to my website update, having just a page I can easily curate and update as new studies come out will help with this.

And to those who send me apologetic emails saying they tried to find things on Tumblr but the search engine wasn’t working: it's cool. Tumblr doesn’t show me half of my MCAS info posts at this point.

Functional webbed site.

[spacecolonie]

i adore your paintings so muchhh would you happen to have any other tips or tutorials for your process? anything from thumbnailing all the way to final render

Thank you 😭♥ I appreciate that a lot!! To start with I've got my advice tag (both new and veeery old stuff lol), & my youtube has a couple of speedpaints on it, one with commentary including process, brushes etc

In terms of general stuff about how I approach painting, I tend to tailor the method to the desired outcome. I talk about it more in depth on this post here, I also link to some references & tutorials that I really enjoy/recommend!

Besides that though, I guess I can do a little walkthrough of the Whisper & Tangle painting I uploaded a few months ago, since I tried something new with it that I pseudo integrated into my workflow & could be fun to talk about? 🤔

SO yes, I do always thumbnail when I'm doing a bigger painting, and they're definitely not pretty LOL. I usually use the colour fill lasso just to block in basic shapes and values with a gradient map slapped on the top -- I ended up swapping the values around in the end because it let me use the fireflies as the sole light source, making it more character focused! Then it's the usual process of resketching it all & flatting in the base colours (I also added Whisper's wisps hehe), then adding shading:

This is how I usually approach it, w/ all the shading layers clipped to the original flats to preserve editing. Multiply, screen & overlay are the most common layer modes I use while doing this, and if I'm ever struggling I'll sometimes add a gradient map too in order to unify awkward colours etc. The new thing I tried for this painting was doing what's often nicknamed as a 'clown pass' -- which is using hard edged shapes to create an easily-accessible selection mask for each part:

It looks Super funny but I actually found it very helpful, and I ended up using it to select & cut out all of their body parts onto seperate layers, which were then alpha locked. It meant I could go ham w/ large or textured brushes, smudges etc without worrying about losing those edges, or accidentally over-rendering and screwing up the anatomy in the process!!

I've kept doing something similar since, though it's a bit more dialed back; mainly using the lasso select to chop it up directly and preserve specific/necessary edges, grouping up similar body parts on a single layer etc.

After doing all that, I sat down and started rendering. The background was all blocked in & detailed with a hard round brush and these amazing brushes from Devin Elle Kurtz. There isn't anything super insightful that I think I could type on how I render, but I do have that speedpaint I mentioned earlier that'll probably shed more light. It's just a lot of eyedropping & painting, rinse and repeat

When rendering is done I usually add a concoction of adjustment layers, as well as an overlay w/ a noise texture on it. I also sharpen it all after doing so! These are the ones that I ended up adding for this painting:

The dupe & blur is a fun thing that doesn't always work, but it looks super neat when the painting itself calls for it, especially when paired w/ that noise texture. It can make stuff look like an old/low quality photograph or recording -- here's another example w/ a shadow and amy doodle I posted a few months ago:

That's about it for this painting, the majority of the time spent on it was honestly me rendering those damn leaves 🥲 Very tedious but worth it & it was a really good learning experience. I'm not sure if any of this will prove useful but thank you so much for sending in the ask, & if you (or anyone else reading this) wants a similar breakdown for a different painting of mine, please do let me know and I'll try my best to do one!! 🥺💞

#tutorial #kinda. i'm counting this as one... i should really start a new tag for these sorts of posts because theyre super fun #art breakdown #maybe?? #either way thank you so much ♥

[korusalka]

some more tried and tested firefox addons that i swear on

worldwide radio - listen to live radio stations around the world. perfect for better workflow, learning languages, and discovering new music. my all-time favourite <3

youtube audio - saves bandwidth and battery life by scrapping the video part of music videos, easy to turn off and on

facebook container - deactivates facebook trackers which are goddamn everywhere these days

and some new additions i'm trying out on top of these:

dark reader - activates dark themes while surfing, very eye-soothing

adblocker for youtube - good for everyone's health probably

sponsorblock - blocks sponsored content in youtube videos, community-based

netflix category browser - makes looking for specific categories and sub-categories a little easier as far as i can tell so far

the big advantage of firefox add-ons is that they're easy to turn off, whitelist, pause, and deinstall. also i generally recommend using duckduckgo at least from time to time to give google less data to work with!

#technology #resources #firefox #privacy

[violetmina]

Chokehold - Ch. 3

Chokehold Masterlist

Accepting taglist requests!

Taglist: @roundroald , @i-wished-upon-a-star-one-night , @sexytholland

Pairing: Billy Butcher x Fem!Reader

Word Count: 6,086

Warning: Swearing, minor injuries, minor blood, implied/referenced SA. Butcher is his own warning.

A/N: I honestly try not to let these get longer. There's just a lot in this chapter. And hopefully it's not too convoluted. There's implied SA in this chapter so please be warned. I also apologize if Butcher seems a little ooc. I just really like exploring his layers but not sure if I pull it off. Plus, there's a really cheesy reference I just could not resist. Hope y'all enjoy.

There are some days where coffee is just part of your morning routine. Others, it's a god send. As of late, the latter is more likely to be the case. And this day was just determined to stay that course. It had only been about two hours into your shift at the bureau and already you'd had it up to your eyes with annoyances and inconveniences. 

For starters, your work email had been flooded with extra paperwork, most likely due to "anonymous concerned tips" from a nosy, suburban wife type who had it out for her neighbors. That had not so surprisingly become a thing when the bureau was established. Stormfront's fear-mongering bullshit had one or two ripples that had yet to die down in the public consciousness. Danke schön, Fraulein Mega Bitch.

Then there had been the misplaced files. You had left three specific files locked in your drawer the night before leaving the bureau to drop in briefly to see the Boys. It had only been MM, following up on some phone calls of his own regarding the latest case on a supe who was rumored to be imitating family pets for voyeuristic purposes. When you had chatted with MM and exchanged paperwork to take back to Hughie, you could have sworn those three files had been in your desk. But they were nowhere to be found, even after scouring your cubicle high and low. They weren't classified by any means but you hated the idea of your two FBSA superiors ribbing you over lunch. That's the last thing you needed trying to get back into the field.

On that note, you had left your lunch at home on the counter, forgotten in your flurry to get out the door on time that morning. Not the end of the world but it would mean taking an extra twenty minutes or so out of your already tight lunch break to get something. "Hangry" was not a good mood on you.

When the slightest hint of a lull came up in your workflow, you had made your escape to the break room. The good coffee was out but you didn't dare complain about the 2nd-tier stuff that was still available. As the coffee machine droned it's displeasure, you leaned your head against the cabinets, praying the aroma alone might bring you back to feeling human instead of sloth-like.

Fatigue had become your new norm. Even though Butcher had been kept busy on a handful of operations the last three weeks, cutting your sessions to only once or twice a week, he had made a point to make up for lost time. Late into the night on the few nights he could spare, you had drilled various takedowns, gone over longer mobility drills. While you were getting used to finding little bumps and bruises on you, you couldn't quite shake off the overall soreness that clung to you now. The three T-position throws you had learned - hip, leg and sitting - were pretty much on rotation in your dreams now.

Slipping a mug down from the cabinet, you tried to keep your mind from sliding into the fact that that wasn't the only thing you'd been dreaming of. It had started as something that happened only after every other session or so. But now it was also happening on some nights when you didn't train. If training wasn't keeping you up at night, the persistence of one aforementioned bastard in your subconscious certainly did. 

Not so much the dreams, you realized as you poured the caffeine, but waking up from them. If you were to tell the truth, you weren't sure which dull ache bothered you more these days; the one from your exercises and drills at the Boys office…or the one that left you waking in a small sweat with the ghost of teeth on your skin, calloused fingers dimpling your hips -

"Butcher fucking you?"

You somehow manage to neither spew your coffee nor spill it down the front of you. It sloshed dangerously on the rim of your mug instead as you whirl wide-eyed on Hughie leaning in the doorway. You're awake now. "What?!," you sputtered.

"Oh shit, sorry," he laughs, stepping forward to place a hand on your shoulder. "Didn't mean to startle you. I asked if Butcher's been fucking with you."

Realizing your awkward lapse in hearing you let out a sigh. Once you're sure your beverage is secure again, you reply before a tentative sip, "Well that's random. Why do you ask?"

"Well Victoria and I were just talking about you - not like shit talking, I promise - and I realized you technically have three bosses." He reaches around you to pull a mug of his own from the cabinet with a twinkle in his eye. "Tell me, Miss Independent, how do you do it?"

"Very carefully," you quip.

"Anyway, we're kinda having a bet now and we wanna know which boss seems to fuck you over the most. I mean, one boss is bad enough. Three? One of them has gotta be the worst of the bunch, right? So…" He begins counting on his fingers, "The congresswoman, your greatest pal ever, or the hardass in the trenchcoat."

You pretend to ponder on the question as he looks expectantly over his own coffee. "Hmm. Decisions, decisions. Victoria doesn't see me in person as often as you two, so less fuckery there. Though she does have this nasty habit of preoccupying my old buddy. Like, a lot."

He gives a sheepish smile as you make a tsking sound. It's familiar and you can't help but smile yourself. "But," you continue, "That guy Hughie, he does pay me decently. If I catch him pilching my candy stash again though -"

He throws up a hand in mock surrender at your accusative look. "Why you accusing me?!"

"Because you're the only one that knows where that stash at my desk is, Hughie. And before you say anything, I know I haven't chowed down on them that much recently, so I shouldn't be refilling so quickly."

"Alright, guess I'm caught red-handed. And your last boss?"

"Oh yeah. The hardass. Or sourpuss, your pick." Hughie snickers into his mug at that as he takes a drink. "He's a stubborn, moody slave driver. And don't get me started on the pay. But you know, for a cheap ass he's bought me lunch or dinner more than my other two bosses. Gotta say, he's never gotten my order wrong once either. And he's easy on the eyes, so he's got that going for him -"

"Woah, woah, woah, pump the brakes!," Hughie says, sputtering himself now. "Did you just…?"

"What? What did I say?"

He cocks his head, and it so much resembles a confused puppy you have to refrain from messing his hair like you used to when you were kids. "Did you just admit to me that…you think Butcher is hot?"

You mentally playback your words and - Oh. Oh crap. You fight back the heat trying to flood your cheeks. "I was being-"

"Uh, before you say anything," he cuts you off. "I just wanna clarify; are you about to lie to me or yourself? I mean you can fool anybody else, but I know you, Y/N. Okay, now you can give me your bluff." He makes a wave with his hand for you to proceed. When you shake your head instead, he just grins. "Wow! Oh my god, I shouldn't be surprised. But like…really?"

"I don't like how much you're enjoying this, Hughie."

"What? You kidding? This is like some prime intel you just gave me," he smirks. "Just to see Butcher's reaction when -"

You reach out and wrap Hughie's tie around your fingers, gripping it firmly. Just enough to pull it taut. "Hugh Campbell, you even think of muttering a word of this, especially to Butcher, not even Annie is gonna save you from me. Are we clear?"

"Christ, easy." You feel a bit irritated at him laughing at your threat. He untangles his tie from your fingers. "I wouldn't actually do that to you. He's hard enough to work with. That'd just be, I dunno know, like cruel and unusual."

You shuffle on the spot and shrug. "Yeah, well, now that I've thought of it, you guys should be taking bets on Annie. I'm pretty sure she'd be a safe bet when it comes to asshole bosses. Look at that lot. How is she holding up?"

Hughie's expression shifts and you feel relief at the conversation moving away from your slip. "Shes…she's good. I mean, as good as she can be, all things considered, you know? This whole thing of us going public has its pros and cons, but I think we're doing good. Way better now that we have more room to be honest with each other."

"I think she's good for you. I really do hope you guys last." You flash a smile at him before downing what's left in your mug. You grimace at the after taste and quickly wash the mug as you address him. "I better get back to it. I'll catch you at lunch."

As you dry and place the mug back Hughie places a hand on your shoulder again. "Hey wait, I had something else I wanted to say to you. Umm…" He shifts, peeking out the door before giving you a look of genuine concern. "I also wanted to see how you were doing. You look tired a lot, and I know you said to not worry about the bruises. And I know you don't like to talk about it but -I mean I worry-!"

Your brows furrowed in confusion. "What are you saying, Hughie?"

He chews on his bottom lip for a moment before letting out a sigh. "Look, I'm just gonna spill my guts here. I'm really glad that we're back to being in each other's lives again. But I'm also worried about the fact that you're here. In the bureau. And in the crew. In this life, this mess. I feel kinda guilty, like I've sucked you into all this. Like I got sucked into it. Especially after what happened a few months ago, at the warehouse."

"Hughie…" You say it to the floor, unsure if it's in warning or acknowledgement.

"I know, I know! I'm not trying to treat you with kid gloves or anything. And I know you probably think I'm full of shit when I say that. I just…" He shakes his head. "Not gonna lie, that kinda scared the shit out of me. I lost Robin, my dad had to go into witness protection, Annie's in that fucking tower. And then you…I just don't want you to be another casualty in my life. I need you to know that."

You smile at your friend fondly, feeling a bit moved by his confession. You wrap him in a tight hug for a moment before stepping back, making sure you have eye contact. "I get it, Hughie. This is a shitshow. And it's messy. I know I fucked up at the warehouse. But it's not going to happen again, not if I have anything to say about it. And I know you just want to protect me. But you have got to let me have some say in this."

You squeeze his hand. "I'm already in this. Please take the kid gloves off."

Hughie frowns. "I…I can't do that just yet. But I will try!," he exclaims at your disapproving face. "I'll get you back out there. You'll have a say, I promise. Just…Just let me find a way to ease you back in. Something, I dunno - less bloody."

You bite back a sigh. Both of you know full well that none of this is ever not bloody. There are no operations with guaranteed safety. But you don't argue, just give another quick hug before leaning in the door of the break room. "You never said how much you bet Neuman. But maybe if I see a positive change in numbers on my next paycheck, and you treat me to lunch today, we can sway that bet in your favor."

His face scrunches incredulously and it puts a smile back on your face. "Wow, blackmail and bribery now? Okay, yep, that's it. You've spent way too much time working with Butcher. I'm just gonna have to amp up your hours here."

"Like hell!," you call back as you head back to your desk.

^^^

The rest of your shift had in fact been as tedious as you had dreaded. But there had been a brief moment during lunch when your phone buzzed against your pocket. Between bites of the takeout - Hughie had in fact decided to treat you to lunch - you read the words lighting up your screen.

Operation postponed. Flatiron at 8. Don't be late.

Gruff and to the point, even in text. You knew about the latest operation being rescheduled thanks to Hughie catching up between bites and conversation with Neuman. Being a liaison between the bureau and the Boys was one of your unofficial titles. You just hadn't expected Butcher to be so prompt. 

Nevertheless, it had been something to look forward to and took off some of the monotonous edge of paperwork. By the time you had pulled on your coat and clocked out, your mind had already begun the shift from emails and files to takedowns again. You had stopped at your apartment long enough to change out of office attire into something more "combat" friendly - a basic t-shirt and sturdy jeans - and had already begun mentally rehearsing the three from T-position. One from hip. One by heel hooking the leg. One with foot behind the ankle and sitting back. Hip, leg, sitting. Hip, leg, sitting.

By the time you had exited the elevator at the Boys office, it was 8pm sharp, and you were already bracing for whatever toil your body would be put through this time. When you slipped through the door you found the office dim again, framed in the soft glow of a couple lamps with the city backdrop, and nearly vacant. To your surprise, the floor had already been cleared. At the far end stood Butcher, leaning over a pad with pen in hand, phone tucked between his ear and shoulder.

"The fuck you mean it's seventy-five dollars?! It's bloody Legos!" You hung your coat next to his as Butcher scribbled something down with a scowl. "Better be lined with fucking gold. And you're sure this the one he wants? He don't already have one like it?" A beat and the scowl grew deeper. "I don't know what he had in that goddamn compound, never even put my foot on the front step. That's why I'm asking you, Grace."

Ah, there it was. The softie slipping its tender fingers through the bars of the smoldering, steely shell of Billy Butcher. You were grateful he was too preoccupied to notice the soft smile that pulled at your lips. His look would have turned thunderous for sure with a growly "fuck off" tacked on for good measure. You took your time treading across the office as he proceeded with his call.

"I'll buy 'em. Just cause I know I ain't the one that has to repack the fucking things every time you relocate. But not a damn one better go missing." You were close enough now you could hear the muffled sound of a feminine voice. He sighed, "I'll be there when I can, just not yet. Tell him in the morning to call me, yeah?"

Butcher finally looked up to see you a few paces from his desk. He quickly tucked pen and paper into a drawer and straightened. "Alright. Keep you posted. Yeah. Take care."

"All good?," you asked cautiously as he put his phone down on the desk.

"Yeah, all good." Then he grumbled, "Fucking kids are expensive."

"Always have been. But they don't stay kids very long." You cast a glance over your shoulder at the reoriented furniture. "You starting without me?"

His scowl turned into the crooked smirk you knew well. "Not a chance, love. Start your combat hip drill, then do your hip stretches. You're gonna need them tonight."

You gave a half-assed salute and turned to quickly cross the floor before he could retaliate. The drill was fairly easy to do now, despite your stiffness from prior sessions, and you were almost accustomed to the minor discomfort on your contact points now. After a few cycles you shifted onto all fours, feet together and sliding knees out as flat as possible to stretch your hips. As you shifted your weight intermittently between your forearms and back on your heels, you caught Butcher lazily stretching out of the corner of your eye. First arms, then those long legs. Rolling his head on his neck.

You had learned now that Butcher didn't stretch often for your sessions. If he did, it meant things were going to be more hands on. You weren't sure if that made you nervous, or eager for new techniques. "What's the plan?," you asked, keeping the nervousness from creeping in your voice.

"Got another pop quiz. Let's see how far you got in that lousy gym. Sit up and pay attention." You shifted to sit cross legged as he removed his watch again. "What is mount?"

"It's generally the offensive position. Whoever is on top."

"Name me three mount positions."

"There's S-mount. It's named because of the way your legs look on the floor. There's side mount, or side control. You're cross bodied that way. And then full mount, which is like…schoolyard bully position? They're pretty much sitting on your guts, ground and pound. It's the most aggressive."

Butcher nods as he scuffs towards you. "Good enough, I suppose. You got the gist. And what's guard then?"

"That's defense. On your back, legs wrapped around their waist. It's half guard if your legs are only wrapped around one of their legs."

"You're talking about closed guard. There's more than one. But we'll work with that." He kneels down beside you, twirling a finger. "Go on then. Breakfall and show me your guard."

You sigh, knowing how silly this will look. But you tilt back into the short breakfall, throwing up your legs as if wrapping them around something, crossing your ankles.

"Oh we're slow tonight, aren't we?," he mutters. He wraps a hand around one of your ankles, making them uncross, the other hand hooking in your belt, and pulls you across the floor. He lets go of your belt abruptly once your ass touches his knees and places his hand by your hip. He shifts the ankle still in his grasp behind him. "I meant on me, love."

"Oh."

Oh. Your brain stutters, and it takes a second for it to catch up after he lets go of your ankle. You bring up the other and cross them behind his back. You knew this would happen eventually, it's jiu jitsu one-oh-one. But for whatever reason you weren't prepared for it to be…well, right now. You weren't prepared for the warmth of him either.

Butcher looks down and back at each of your legs. Then down at you with a raised eyebrow. "Really?"

"What?"

"You call this your guard?"

"Um…yes? Why?"

In a blur, Butcher leans back, causing your ankles to part, and shoves one knee to the floor. You barely register his legs moving and he's suddenly sitting on your hips with his thighs on either side, his own ankles hooked behind the back of your legs. Full mount.

"What did that guard you from? A fucking leg cramp?" He raps his knuckles on your forehead briefly before you swat his hand away. "Where's your fucking head tonight, eh?"

"Guess I wasn't ready," you muttered.

"Well you best get ready or you're in some trouble. It's called guard for a reason. It's actually a shit place to be as an attacker. If you do it right. You cannot let me pass your guard."

"So…You're the Balrog and I'm Gandalf?" You flash a cheeky grin at his confused look. "You know." You imitate holding a staff two handed. "You shall not pass?"

He closes his eyes, inhaling deep through his nose. He stays that way for a long moment. When he opens his eyes again, they're sharp with an equally pointed smile. He places his hands on your shoulders. "Are you cozy?"

Your grin vanishes at his too jolly tone. "Um…"

"Too cozy, I think, love. As a matter of fact, I don't think you fully appreciate…" His fingers curl into tight fists in your shirt, and he leans over you, his expression filling your vision. "...just how bad I could fuck up your world from here."

Your eyes flick down at his fists under your throat. Flicking back to his face, the smile is gone but his eyes are still sharp. "Said it yourself; ground and pound. And that's just bare handed. Imagine what could happen if I had a weapon. I didn't think I'd have to remind you what that feels like."

You can't help glaring up at him. "You don't."

"You wanna make sure that don't happen again? You really want me to teach you?"

"Yes." It's snippy, despite your best efforts.

"Then quit fucking about. And get. Your fucking. Head right."

He loosens his grip and sits back up. You ignore the protest in your hips and focus on reigning in your anger from him throwing that in your face. After the moment with Hughie in the break room, it felt a more tender subject than it had been in awhile. After a minute, you trust yourself to speak. "What did I do wrong the first time?"

Butcher's proverbial hackles seemed to lower, a simmering annoyance taking its place as he shifted off your hips and back between your knees. "You didn't commit. Put me in your guard again."

You wrapped your legs around him as before, managing even as he sat back on his heels. "What you're doing here is pretending. If there's one thing you always do in jiu jitsu, it's that you stay clean and tight. You need to trap me.That lock you got with your ankles? Make them harder to separate. And for God's sake -" he pats the outside of one of your thighs - "squeeze. Pinch me with your knees. You ain't gonna bother me none."

You shift a little on the floor and do as instructed, ignoring the intrusive thoughts that begin to replace what's left of your anger. He nods. "Better. Want just enough pressure to keep me here but not wear you out if you need to maintain for too long. Ideally, if you pull guard, you incapacitate and get the fuck out. Understood?"

You nod. "Understood."

"Do you understand why this is a bad place for me to be?"

"Not…quite," you frown. "Isn't it better to be on the attack?"

"Yes and no. Depends who you're dealing with. And from your position, you can do both. I'm a bit limited here."

"How so?"

"I'm gonna try to get away from you. Don't let me." He sits back further and you counter pull with your legs. To your surprise, there's a bit more force than expected and he jolts a little, posting a hand on the floor to stop himself, leaning a bit over you now. Butcher flashes a grin then shoves off, yanking back. You suck in a sharp breath as your guard and his momentum forces you to sit up with him, essentially placing you in his lap. You brace a hand on his chest out of reflex to avoid colliding.

"See? I have to deal with not just trying to attack you. I have to deal with you throwing my balance where the fuck you want it. Throw in the attacks you can do from guard and you'll be the one fucking up my world."

"Ok," you nod slowly. "I get it. I think…I think I get it." You hold onto your focus on the training as best you can. But it's not easy with the lamplight flaring the colors in one of his eyes - warmer brown than you noticed before with rivers of green throughout - and highlighting the curve of his bottom lip. Who's the warm one now?

"Good. Now here comes the fun part again," Butcher says, snapping your focus to the session. "Back down. You gotta learn how to not let me pass guard."

He shifts and you lean back, pulling him with. You do a mental check of your ankles, knees, thighs as he settles slightly over you. The only thing you're gonna let him accuse you of pretending now is that you're any good at this yet.

"For every technique, there's a counter and or a defense. Guard is no exception. First thing one might try to break your guard is this." He places his forearms on your inner thighs, trying to slip down and push out at your knees. "If your guard is tight like I told you, I'm gonna struggle a bit. This is the polite way." He smirks. "And then there's this."

Butcher shifts his forearms back a little, sinking his elbows in the inner tender skin just above your kneecaps as he pushes. You gasp and shoot up to reach for his arms, but drop back down hard when it intensifies the pressure there. You let your legs give up the guard completely, feet hitting the floor. "Fuck!"

"Tingly, ain't it?, " he grins.

"No, that hurts!" You rub at the points now on fire with the distinct thrill of nerve pain.

He shows the first mercy of the night by tapping gently on the points and then about midway up your thigh, slightly in the inner side in the thick of the muscle. "Here and here or so. That's where they're gonna put that pressure if they want you. If you wanna survive the bastard, you better make that burn your friend."

"Noted," you grumbled, relieved that the pain was subsiding fairly quickly.

"Put me back in. Got another you gotta watch for."

You groan and pull guard again. You have no doubts where your newest bruises will be in the morning. This time Butcher reaches back a hand to touch your ankles. "If I can figure out which foot you got on top, I can break it there. Like this."

He finds your right on top, shifts his left knee against your tailbone. His right leg stretches out to the side but back where you can't grab it. His fingers deftly slip between where your ankles cross and when he leans back, they slip like butter. In an instant his hand slides from your ankle up the back of your leg, pushes and you're on your side. Butcher leans over you again, effectively pinning you in and you have to turn your head to look at him.

"This is not good. I could start working to take your back. So if you're on the floor, always keep those shoulders flat unless you have to move them. Don't ever let me take your back. But we'll get to that another night."

He sits back on his heels again and you follow to sit cross legged on the floor. Before he can instruct you, you interject, "Wait, I have a technical question."

"Which is?"

"In terms of size difference, what if I can't get my guard on my attacker? I mean if I was dealing with somebody built like Hughie, yeah, I could probably squeeze them like a tube of toothpaste." 

Butcher snickers with a nod. "Kid bruises like a fucking banana. Could you imagine him explaining those to Starlight?"

You swat at him but he just grins, and laughs at your scowl. You return to the topic at hand and continue. "Anyway! You said I could hip throw somebody like MM, but I don't know if I could lock my ankles if I pulled somebody like him in my guard. And we've dealt with assholes even bigger than him. So what then?"

His grin turns to a small smile, one that you rarely ever see. "You're shifting your mindset already. That's good. Means I'm doing something right." 

He shifts, moves to sit next to you, one leg out, one knee up. "That's why I said there's more than one guard. A bigger bloke you want to take out, not muck about and let him use his size against you. Just wait till we get to stacking. There's open guard, rubber guard, spider, butterfly..." He waves a hand and rolls his eyes. "The names ain't fucking important."

Butcher turns and looks at you. The usual smirk or scowl are gone. It's pensive, dare you say soft, and you fight to not squirm under his gaze. He finally breaks the silence, his voice low but earnest. "Memorizing techniques ain't important. What is important is that you keep yourself safe. That you do whatever it fucking takes to survive, I don't care what it is. But you come back here." He taps the floor. "You come back here to Hughie, and the boys, and to me. Am I clear?"

You're a little stunned by it. Despite how most would only see all that anger and swagger, you know that Butcher cares. It's not just off-putting, it's horrendously unhealthy how he goes about it. You don’t approve but you get it. His fury and his rage are byproducts, not lone elements. They're rooted deeply in that need to protect, and the sense of self-loathing and guilt when he feels that he has failed to do so. And you don't dare spoil how he's presented it this time. So you nod, sincere. "Whatever it takes," you answer.

He nods then blinks, and the pensive look recedes. Whatever crawls into Butcher's mind makes him scowl again. He stares at some spot on the floor just in front of his boot and he echoes,"Whatever it takes…"

The shift concerns you. "Butcher?" When he doesn't answer, you try again. "Billy?"

Butcher looks at you that time. His voice is still low but serious now. "There's something I need to teach you." He taps the floor again. "Lay back."

You're still not sure about the dark look that's come over him but you do as he asks. You lay back and prepare to put him in guard. But he doesn't let you. Just as you start to bring your legs up he pushes them down hard and swings one of his own to sit on your hips again. He doesn't hook his ankles like before and instead you feel his knees like a vice, caging you in. You open your mouth to say something but gasp instead when he snatches your wrists and slams them above your head.

Butcher stares down at you as you instinctively try to free your hands. And fail, you hardly budge. He's heavier than before. Your pulse quickens when his fingers tighten ever so slightly in response. Your breath is on the verge of joining the pace but you try to control it. You stare back at him, uncertain.

"If there's anything I teach you," he breathes, "that you must always remember, it's that you must stay calm. You hear me?"

You nod slowly, trying to wrap your head around the situation.

"You can feel aggressive, scared, I don't give a fuck. But you lose your head, it's done." He glances at your wrists before tilting his head to look back down at you. "Homelander. The Deep. You know the types we're dealing with," he growls.

You almost hear the click in your brain, and Butcher seems to see the realization on your face. "I think you know what kinda situation this would be out there. You need to know what to do."

You let out a tense breath and nod again as you close your eyes. It's uncomfortable but uncomfortable is Butcher's favorite. You focus your breathing, try to keep your heart rate steady, even as you feel his breath fanning across your face. You open your eyes after a moment. "Calm," you say evenly.

"Good," he answers. "Listen close. The bastard who tries this may start where you can put him in closed guard. But not always. He will try to restrain you first. And keeping your hips down is a big one. How much can you move right now?"

You try to move your hips, to shrimp out. It's as successful as your wrists - none. It unsettles you. But you hold onto the fact that it's Butcher, and you're in the office, and you're uncomfortable but still safe. You keep calm as you answer, "Can't."

"You're gonna fix that." He shifts up and the pressure on your hips increases. "You can get out but you gotta time it right. Bring your heels as close to your ass as you can and try to throw me off."

"It's not working," you grunt, your legs barely nudging him up.

"Not yet. They need to have their weight forward. Throwing them off balance is the goal. When you feel that bastard lean over you, you're gonna shoot your arms down. But not straight down. Down and out. Like a snow angel."

"Snow angel?"

"Yes. Shove your hands to the side and sweep them down as hard and fast as you can. Just like a snow angel. At the same time, you're gonna push up with your hips. Get your ass as far off the ground as you can. You need the momentum from both motions. Got it?"

"I think so."

"When you feel my weight on your wrists, just enough off your hips, you throw me. You'll feel it when my balance is in your favor."

"What do I do after?," you frown. "They'll still be on top of me."

"Whatever it takes." He shakes his head. "I'm not talking gym etiquette. Get your foot on their hip, shove off and run. If you can't get them off, give them hell. Ears, eyes, nose, throat, all the tender bits. Grab something as a weapon. Use your fucking teeth. Whatever it takes."

Butcher flexes his grip on your wrists again and you pray there won't be bruises there. Those would be far harder to hide or explain. "Close your eyes. Focus. When you feel it, throw me off."

"Butcher," you start to stammer a little. "What happens-? What do I do if I can't-?"

He glares and begins to lean forward. "Don't you fucking start that," he grits out. "Don't you lose your he-!"

You sweep your arms and shove your hips up as fast you can. You had expected Butcher to catch himself. But apparently your fake mini freak out worked better than expected. His upper body is thrown up and over, you hear the solid smack against the floor and a muffled curse. You drop back to the floor and freeze.

"Did you just play me?," he grunts as he starts to shift back to a sitting position. As he does you feel something hit your collarbone. Your eyes go wide when you see his face. The lamplight glints off the thick trickle of red seeping from one side of his nose. He reaches up to touch it with his fingertips, cocking his head to the side at the sight of it. His gaze shifts back down to you.

Butcher's face splits into a slow smile, licking the blood that seeps onto his top lip.

"I'm sorry." It comes out as a rasp. "I am so sorry. I-I-I didn't-!"

"Don't you ever fucking apologize for that." He swipes the blood drop off your collarbone before touching the blood on his face again. He smears it away but it returns, slow but steady. The smile does not falter. "That is exactly what I needed from you. But…let's not make that a habit, yeah?"

You nod. You still don't trust that smile. Butcher shakes his head as a wheezing laugh escapes him. "We'll call it short tonight. Pick up on guard another time. Let's stop me from bleeding all over everything." 

He slips off you, offering his non-bloody hand and helps you to your feet as he stands. Before he pulls away, you feel his warm breath against the shell of your ear in a purr. "Good fucking girl."

#billy butcher x reader #billy butcher #the boys fanfic

[genericpuff]

Alright, update on the tablet situation, I do NOT have good news but there are some silver linings.

First off, thank you all so much for your patience. That one week I took off to relax seemed to be an invitation for the universe to fuck with my shit because my tablet literally chose the worst time to get on my nerves ( This is totally not something I'm gonna bring up with my therapist as proof that I'm not allowed to rest /s) I've tried just about everything to get it working again, I got a replacement 3-in-1 cable and even that didn't do anything, so I've ordered in a new pen, but that's not due to show up for another week or two.

However, I do not want to wait a week or two on the off chance that a new pen even solves the problem.

So the GOOD NEWS in all this is that I do still have my iPad. It wasn't setup with Clip Studio Paint because I own a perpetual license for my PC, but seeing as how now I can't use it on my PC (at least not with my tablet pen) I've gone ahead and setup the mobile version on my tablet, thankfully I got a discount because I already own a perpetual license but it's still gonna cost me $10/month so that's yet another subscription to slap on the 'ole credit card.

Now that does mean I have to go through the painstaking efforts of moving everything from my PC onto my tablet, but thankfully that issue is easily solved with cloud backups and transferring. Really all I need to be able to do is draw, I can still do speech bubbles and text input and texture overlays and all that post-production stuff on my PC, but anything that requires actual drawing I'm gonna be using my iPad for. So please, don't mind if you notice some weird little art differences between Episode 30 and 29, I'm adjusting to a new workflow! It shouldn't be too bad because I'll still be using the exact same brushes and textures and all that fun stuff that I do on my PC, it just comes with the adjustment of drawing primarily on iPad, which I don't normally do (I usually only draw on my iPad for tattooing and that's in Procreate which I still suck at using outside of lineart LMAO)

This is a very stressful situation that I'm hoping will only be temporary until I get that new tablet pen, and if THAT doesn't solve the issue, then I'm gonna have to start shopping for a new tablet entirely, and that's not something I can do immediately because I'm already starting to struggle financially due to the slow season creeping in at work and I'm still paying off that new PC I put down on layaway (which I'm regretting already). All that said, if you want to help a pal out, please consider tossing a dollar or two at me on my Ko-Fi, it's all gonna go towards a new drawing tablet if I need it (and if the pen solves the issue, then you'll be helping me stay afloat so I can keep bringing you guys the good shit LOL)

What's wild is that in all my Google searching, I found a thread from two months ago with literally the EXACT same issue, under the exact same conditions, in which OP's tablet pen unexpectedly stopped registering with their Huion Kamvas 22 Plus that they had owned for two years. According to them, it did start working again, after resetting the PC and re-installing the driver over and over again, but I've already done that myself a ton of times and I'm tired of being let down and that doesn't seem like a "real" solution beyond luck, so I'm gonna take a break from doing that while I get my iPad set up. I have the sneaking suspicion this might have to do with some recent Windows updates that just rolled out, my PC had definitely gone through a couple leading up to the malfunction. This wouldn't be the first time Microsoft has fucked with my tablet functionality so I literally wouldn't be surprised if it was something like that. Either that, or the '2' in Kamvas 22 stands for "will only last for 2 years before stopping entirely" LOL

Anyways, that's all for now. Thank you all so much for your patience and understanding through all this. While I don't want to have to reduce the quality or frequency of what I put out for you guys due to technical issues, I also don't want the comic to stop entirely, so if this turns into one of those desperate situations where I'm delivering you guys episodes of Rekindled drawn on a Nintendo DS, so be it. I'm not gonna let this beat me.

#update #update post #lore rekindled #lore rekindled comic #lore rekindled update #technical difficulties #genericpuff #generic puff

[iztea]

When i first started digital i would make a layer for everything basically for the face clipping make several layers to it and same for the hair/ background/ every piece of clothing...etc

I did take it down a notch recently and all but i just saw a video from samdoesart and noticed he LITERALLY JUST USES ONE LAYER FOR THE WHOLE PAINTING!!!??

sorry was wondering if you'd recommend a certain number of layers

the amount of layers you use is highly dependent on the style you're going for, the complexity of a piece, your personal drawing style and preference etc so i really don't believe there should be a certain amount of layers you should use. I myself fluctuate between using many layers or just painting everything on one so there really isn't a correct way or number to go for.

Howeverrrr, i think there is a certain threshold where layers become too excessive and turn into more of a burden than an aid, something that you probably noticed as well. If you find yourself becoming frustrated with the constant switching between layers for every single part you've singled out, then it's better to take notice of that and just tone down the number a bit. Samdoesarts, despite his guynextdoor vibes, is a professional and so of course he doesn't feel the need for many layers because he knows what he's doing and has a very clear workflow and style in mind. To some extent, i believe that using a minimal amount of layers does also stem from a place of confidence in your skills and/or process.

Me personally, I tone down the layer amount moreso out of laziness and because i don't like to have my flow interrupted by some "technical" errors as in "whoopsie i painted on the wrong layer again" so i just., really try to keep it as low as possible; sometimes it works sometimes it doesn't and i suffer

I add new layers every time i want to " try something new" or fix something whenever i'm still unsure of how it will turn out. New layers are for experimentation. I treat them like some sort of backup or checkpoint of some kind- that's their primary function for me. If the new thing i tried painting over doesn't work out i can just hide the layer i painted on and either try again or give up on that idea as i concluded it doesn't look good. A safety net, if u will.

One rule i do follow however no matter what is to always always have a separate layer for the hair- both color and lineart. that is the only thing i make a conscious decision to keep separate (because of previous struggles and failed attempts) For everything else, I just paint it on one layer with those aforementioned experimentation layers on top. Same for rendering. And i always merge them together once i think it looks good

I really don't like having too many layers cause it becomes annoying and messy. The only time I deliberately use a shiton of layers is for commissions, really.

i know i didn't really answer your question, but i really don't think i can recommend a certain number, so i just shared my experience with layers instead. Bottom line is, as long as you find them helpful, use as many layers as you want but don't overdo it

#i have a lot of pieces that i gave up on exactly bc there were too many layers and it was too overwhelming #so yeah less is more #tbh i have more hidden layers than active ones #my so-called “backups” #that i never refer to and refuse to delete “just in case” #i have maybe 2 or 3 active layers so to speak #i'd recommend being very loose with drawing and not very strict #but what do i know it's just personal preference #ask iztea

[girlfriendsofthegalaxy]

tuesday again 11/21/2023

awful lot of cooking content from me, who hates cooking but finds the evenings jittery and boring

listening

Doorbell by Sterling Press, off the spotify weekly recced playlist. i don't know that i like this song. i don't know that it's particularly good. goddamn if it isn't catchy. alt britpop, they hate being compared to blur but mmmm. you do hear it. notes of ska as well. a song to blast in your car when your spring break plans fell through and you're driving to the good target two towns away from your hometown.

i don't think this music video could have existed pre-pandemic-- idk doorbell cams were that ubiquitous or well known, despite heavy advertising from nest.

from an interview:

Speaking about the new release, they said, “We wrote the song in our mates garage using drum samples off YouTube. We spent all night writing it then in the early hours of the morning drove to Maccies to have breakfast and had it on repeat the whole time. We all fell in love with it straight away. These lyrics speak to the importance of authenticity and sincerity in your actions. In a world where appearances and pretences can be misleading, it's a reminder to be true to yourself and to avoid trying to impress others for the sake of it. “I feel like its an experience we all share. We all know someone who goes off to uni or gets a new job and you bump into them on the street and they act as if they have no idea who you are. I guess this song is reflection of our frustrations towards those people.”

they have what i would consider an unusual amount of hype and presence for a band that has exactly three songs out, but they've all been making music together and separately since well before the pandemic so maybe they've just finally broken out? i can't figure out who these kids are related to. i don't think it's a full on industry plant but i do think someone's dad has some money.

a friend once said she hated how eighties songs faded out like a printer running out of ink, and i do not particularly care for how 2020s songs end with the entire band vanishing underwater.

this song is truly not that deep but it is thoroughly stuck in my goddamn head.

listening: special podcast edition

i am not looking for solutions. do not say solutions at me. i am taking through a brain thing and having a weird workflow and brain problem. i have tried other apps with browser support and do not like them, and i cannot have my personal apple id tied to my work computer bc i have and frequently use a work apple id.

i have been listening to podcasts through Spotify ever since mmm november ‘20. it has not been a good experience but juggling the Apple Podcasts app through my phone (distraction minefield) and whatever im listening to or working on with the work computer is a nightmare. ethics of spotify aside, it is a tremendously successful all in one listening platform. i do not have the brainspace to manage my own music library, and support my favorite artists in other ways.

i am not looking for solutions. do not say solutions at me.

however, if you listen to enough podcast episodes, spotify does not seem to believe you when you tell it to unfollow a podcast. it just keeps letting you know hey this has a new episode. this got me stuck on a loop where i was listening to more and more episodes of two very prolific conspiracy theory debunking podcasts to the exclusion of almost everything else. this was not very good for my mental health.

i am not looking for solutions. do not say solutions at me.

despite the real annoyance of finagling a very distracting phone and the work laptop, i have gone back to Apple Podcasts and (after weeding out a variety of podcasts for a variety of reasons) started listening to friends at the table again. not sure why i stopped but i felt a weird amount of guilt around restarting?? the tablefriends neither know nor care. i have finally finished road to palisade and am excited but nervous about starting palisade proper

-

reading

a local religious thrift store has absolutely rancid vibes but does regularly have 6/$1 book sales. there were a couple older trade paperback comics the last time: the first three volumes of ULTIMATE XMEN and a radom What If? superman.

my trouble with the xmen, and i have to read something from it once every two years to remind myself, is that magneto is right. they will never be able to assimilate into white picket fence middle america, or even among the liberal coastal elites or whatever the term du jour was in 1999. the box will always be smaller and you will never be perfect enough. i did not enjoy this enough to continue bc of this fundamental disagreement with most xmen comics.

also it looks like this. magneto’s lair has an arch in the shape of the arch on the front of his helmet and that was pretty baller, but there’s a real. what was they gimmick blog about all the comic book women in contorted spine-breaking poses? it’s like that a lot. WHAT is ororo’s body doing there

-

watching

hey. what the fuck do you mean tomato sauce is that easy. i dislike tomato sauce and almost exclusively eat jar upon jar of aldi brand pesto. im not allergic bc tomatoes aren't tingly but it's just sort of Nothing all the time. what do you mean it can be good???

i don't actually remember why i'm subscribed to mr internet shaquille. perhaps, like so many other food things, it's kali's fault.

-

playing

g/enshinposting.

pulled this horrid little brat. very pleased with myself.

i do not. love. her story quest. it falls into the childrens' media trap of Sometimes It's Okay For Other People To Stomp All Over Your Boundaries If It's For The Good Of The Group! or perhaps this is just a thing i'm particularly twitchy about. either way, annoyed that other characters of this importance have gotten some deeply moving writing and so far furina has...not gotten that.

the next character i am excited about is lolita taylor swift, or geo-aligned lady with big fuckoff sword. from some early maybe-leaks i think she would pair beautifully with my playstyle and my pirate lady with big sword. my playstyle is mostly brute force damage. i hit things as hard as i can until they fall over and i've played the entire game (with some exceptions that required actual thinking about elemental reactions) that way. it pleases me.

re: the conclusion of the annapausis sidequest, genshin does a really good job of teasing out "ok in a world with actual gods, what does spirituality look like/what are the differing views on fate/how do people make sense of an afterlife". mostly this is gnosticism. and sometimes it's a real life occultist secret society (reskinned Rosicrucianism). fascinating writing choices.

-

making

turkey cottage pie with scalloped potatoes, bc i had a five-pound bag of russets that were starting to sprout. im just going to yoink this pic i posted earlier bc it is now half gone and in tupperware form

this is the first time ive ever cooked in a dutch oven and im in love. i thrifted this for $20 some weeks ago but bc the lid has some chips and rust i haven't used it. which is silly, bc the body of the oven is fine. de-rusting and seasoning the lid will wait for a day when i actually need it bc for now we can get by with doubled-over sheet of aluminum foil.

used this recipe: only had a pound of ground turkey and liberally stretched it with potatoes (i think about three and a half pounds out of five) and three pounds out of a cheap frozen veggie mix bag. did not include mushrooms bc i did not like them. threw in some bay leaves bc i have a giant bag of them, i think i almost doubled the wine bc i doubled the recipe, but i do not think i remembered to double the beef stock. i also shook in a liberal amount of italian seasoning bc i have a cheap jar from aldi i want to use up.

the final product was somewhat soupy. i anticipated that slicing the potatoes was going to be the longest part (mostly true, i had to take breaks) and kept them in a big bowl of cold water to stop them browning while i chopped and after i blanched them. i also could have reduced the filling down some more but i am not a patient woman.

not as intended but still yummy, which was a lovely surprise bc usually when i fuck recipes up i fuck them up But Good. plus new technique (dutch oven). if i make this again (likely) i will do instant potatoes on top bc this was a fuck of a lot of chopping for one recipe. thinking about getting one of those stupid little hand smash veggie choppers bc a full food processor is extremely out of budget.

#tuesday again #tuesday again no problem

[civilotterneer]

I may or may not be missing summer (which is probably bad because we just got our first major snow event and it's only gonna get worse) and wish the pools were not frigid, so I did a boredom render while trying to learn a few new things. Plus its so cool to see the model just ... doing things! I'm excited to make more of these.

Today's log of learned things is how to make some simple water textures with wave movement (not exactly smart but mostly just simple shapes), as well as better workflow for keyframes. I also learned about Mixamo and Rokoko, which are awesome programs for a newb like me! Most of the animation is from Mixamo, but I tried to fix some hand movements and added the head tilt and smile. Was trying to work with Blender Wiggles 2 (for hair physics), but I kept getting this strange jerking effect and unwanted movement, so clearly more to work on there.

Guess the next thing to do is work on the issues above and make a winter outfit and regret it being winter even more!

Also this guy is my VRChat model now! It's still a bit ... unrefined, but it does have a medium rating.

So much computer stuff and learning recently, Blender stuff, basics of Unity to make my model. Not to mention I do AutoCAD at work. If I spend anymore time in front of computer screens, I'm gonna become a protogen!

Base model by @galileogb. Modified and rendered by @civilotterneer.

#otter furry #furry #fursona #3d render #blender #Civil

[unorthodox-oblivion]

I'll tell you about my day then you tell me yours?

I tried foundation today, my friend is a makeup artist and influencer and she gifted me foundation but i never wear it so for her i tried it and i think it looks good but ugh im not a full coverage girl. i don't even wear concealer but we have a special event tomorrow so I'll wear it so she can see it on me lol. also im drinking a mango juice + tequila drink right now and it's great but i should've used Cachaça but i forgot i had it. this tequila is very good and expensive though, someone got it as a gift for my dad. do you drink alcohol? if so what do you prefer?

Deal!

I'm not much of a makeup girl. I hardly ever wear it and I definitely do not know what I'm doing when it comes to wearing it. But it can be fun and I'm happy you had a good time trying it and think it looks good. You don't have to succumb to the pressure of wearing it, though. Just be yourself and do what makes you happy.

I hope your special event is good, tomorrow! I'm sure it will be!

Oooooh you have Cachaça??? What kind? I do drink alcohol, on occasion. Not ironically, tequila has ALWAYS been my favorite drink and I can handle it well. I don't mix it with anything, though. I'm more of a "shots" kinda gal than a fruity drink gal. I do love a good Moscow Mule if I'm going for drinks (but that's vodka). I do enjoy beer, as well. Honestly, if there's alcohol in it, I'll probably drink it. But fruity things that aren't lemon/lime are not for me.

My day was alright. Got some minor, but good news. Had lunch out with my favorite coworkers (instead of either taking lunch from home or buying and eating at work) and my day mostly consisted of recutting a video so we could have three shorter, 9x16 versions of it and subtitling them for social media and a long ass meeting about how we can optimize our workflow and now I've been tasked with organizing all the projects at work before ingest, considering all the requirements for each project (not a burden, I love organization and as the most organized person there, I will definitely be good at making life easier for everyone else by keeping things tidy).

Got to play with my boss' kid too and I'm her favorite "daddy's work auntie" too. It was fun, she didn't wanna let go of my hand when we all left.

#nalu answers #random ask game

[eirian]

so im thinking up a few options for myself:

local art market. it happens every second saturday downtown which is a great frequency i think. however i dont know the type of people attending so i dont know if my merch will sell well or at all, and i dont know if they even allow the type of stuff i sell. so this is an iffy one

finding book authors who need illustrations done. i can def do a childrens book illustration if i needed to but id like to find something within my current art style if possible. i'll have to look around and try and find places where ppl are looking for my type of work

sell at conventions. this one's a little tricky bc 1) i have to invest in my stock which is at LEAST $300 for everything i need, 2) im not guaranteed to get on the list of vendors, and 3) these happen very infrequently and i dont know if i can rely on this for steady income

self publish comics. i had thought of this before and i dont think im Currently fit for doing it bc i tend to burn out soooo easily (thats likely a problem with my workflow honestly. its fixable surely) but im hopefully about to get adderall prescribed to me so maybe it'll work out after all lol. unfortunately this isnt an overnight project either though, and i do need to make money Right Now

get into making either live2d vtuber models or 3d models for both vrchat and/or vtubers. i know i know, i cant charge 8k for my first models, but i can at least make a few hundred on a single model. this would be a new skill to learn but its totally possible. theres tutorials and i also vaguely know how to use blender so i can at least try this. i do have fun doing this stuff anyway. im just a lil worried about the level of detail that goes into live2d models, im not super used to detailed designs just yet but its something ive been wanting to put more time and work into, so..

bite the bullet and start putting more work into social media presence and advertising my commissions. i complain about how rough commission work is all the time yes. but genuinely i do enjoy doing commissions for a living. the ONLY reason i complain is because of the inconsistent/low income, and the only reason for That is because i dont have a huge following to the point of where my slots sell out regularly. im no sakimichan. but if i just put in a little more time and work into building a social media presence im sure things will look up in that regard. i just have to fuckin..do it

so ya. these all have pros and cons and im weighing them desperately LOL. if im being honest? im leaning towards three in particular: the vtuber models, building a better social media presence to up my commission demand, and selling at conventions. i can definitely do all three of course, but i have to figure out how to balance everything while learning to do the new things and get good at them. i have no idea how to wrangle social media. ive tried so many things and i keep falling out of it so so easily, its very hard. but fuck dude if 15 year olds on youtube can have 100k subscribers then what the hell am i doing LOL yknow?

[itsbenedict]

Last year, rather than pick a new years' resolution, I made over a dozen new years' resolutions and tried to get them all done. I paced myself with the objective of fitting them all into the year, but... ran into an unexpected obstacle where I kind of didn't have an October, November, or December due to my company abruptly getting sold and my life turning into a nonstop living hell. With that in mind... how'd I do?

get star seeker sequel adventure thing up and running and through the first case

Didn't finish this one! I did start it in September, and I was making good progress and probably would've had it done by the end of the year if I'd had three months to work on it.

get datasouls combat toy complete up to the first miniboss combat

Did it! Tutorial section combat toy is playable on the site.

catch up on TFJ recap logs

Didn't do it! There were a lot of them, and I kind of got bottlenecked on one where I wanted to wait for an art commission to come in that got put off for most of the year. I got sixteen of them done, but more sessions than that happened during the year, so overall I'm behind. Womp womp.

become an accredited AWS Certified Solutions Architect and get that raise my boss has been talking about for ages

Ha ha ha ha did it technically. I did get certified, and I did get the raise, but the raise was more a product of aggressive salary negotiation when the company got sold and my boss got fired. Also accomplishing the second part of that one resulted in me losing a quarter of my year to nightmarish IT bullshit. Oops.

get an adjustable standing desk and under-desk elliptical thingy, and otherwise get an ergonomic workstation set up

Kinda did it. I did, technically, get both things, but the elliptical I got turns out isn't rated for standing use, so I couldn't combine them into a standing workflow the way I wanted. Gotta get a new one and actually put this into practice.

fix the light situation in the bathroom

Yeah just had to call an electrician. Did it no problem.

get through The Sekimeiya and really go to town on that mystery until it’s solved

Nope! Again, probably would've managed it if I'd had time, but I put it off till last since I figured it'd be an easy thing I could fit in around the busy holidays, and it turned out there was a lot worse than just the holidays going on at that time.

also finally play Disco Elysium

This one though- did it, that game is fucking phenomenal.

finish TFTBN character portraits

Did it! Proud of how those turned out.

get a beatrice portrait for my poster wall

run some TPIVW games

Didn't do it, mainly because of an awkward social situation with one of the server participants involving my role as a mod on a different server. Still working that one out. It's rough.

badger the condo association landlady until she does something about the junk clogging up that basement storage room i’m supposed to own, and clean unused bulky stuff out of my house

Did it! Mostly. Still need to get rid of this huge elliptical- it's not selling on craigslist for some reason.

clearly this waitlist thing isn’t working out so take some steps to see an actual doctor for the first time in like three years (and maybe get a cancer screening, or do something about that closed sinus)

Did it! Didn't get the cancer screening mainly because my doctor insisted it'd be unnecessary until I was at least 40, which sounds fake but I don't know enough about cancer to dispute it. I tried various nasal sprays for the sinus thing but I'm pretty sure mucus overproduction is not the issue and I'm gonna need to get surgery, which I didn't get yet. But I did see a doctor finally!

get through the remaining 7 WaniKani levels

Did it! Still need to finish off the remainder of the reviews and do a practice pass and get back on the horse with grammar, but I'm pretty happy about that accomplishment.

Overall, despite a weak finish due to factors mainly outside of my control, I think I did pretty well, and I think having the big list meant I had a much more productive 2023 than I would've had otherwise. Probably gonna make this a recurring thing!

#sc accountability

[phoenix-is-the-hottest-thing]

I don't know if anyone asked this already, but do you have any speculation why the story in Honkai is being rushed so much? I'm quite curious about this because even if Star Rail is in development, what was exactly stopping the writers from making more parts of an in-between arc and releasing them each update in comparison to what we got and make a more cohesive final arc sequence overall? Why hype and rush the ending instead of properly taking care of the characters' development (especially Mei. There is no L in Raiden Mei why are they doing her so dirty) and have a solid conclusion to the first part of the story? If they really moved writers between teams, why leave the damn final arc to people who have NO idea how to handle it in the first place? Sorry if this is more of an essay than an ask

I can only make guesses but I have two theories and some additional factors. Here’s a non-exhaustive list:

Covid has fucked up the workflow a bunch

The open worlds are harder to write for and take more time to develop, because there’s cutscenes with extra animation, picking WHERE to make things happen, side activities etc etc not to mention bug testing and player proofing the map

As a consequence of 2 they have to START working on certain sections of the story much earlier to get them done on time, which means they’re probably working on several sections of the story at once and that makes it much easier to fuck up the flow

I have no idea whether the change of writers is real but I did hear rumors about it, which could result in a change of style/goals/etc.

Because they are rushing the story, they don’t have time to let the characters breathe and prioritize the plot almost all the time. This means taking way too many shortcuts to rush it, like having Rita go behind Durandal’s back to reveal her secret and Mei having magically guessed something is up so nobody is surprised and they can keep moving.

The excessive explanations I guess were either planned because this is meant to be sci-fi ish and it’s a style choice, or because the plot is so sudden they’re worried it’s hard to understand and that was a way to try and patch it for the player. Of course it backfired because the explanations suck

Everyone is quoting literature all the time for no goddamn reason but I figure it’s because the writers did a lot of research/homework to solidify their points (same with the technobabble showing they tried to research Science) but this has led to completely neglecting the character writing, which was excellent before, which obviously pisses of fans. Basically wrong focus

As for what they’re rushing FOR here are my theories:

There’s either something they want to reveal before Star Rail comes out (or some other particular event) which requires the story to be over… or they wanted Kiamei to be released on the same patch, which forces them to do it on CNY for a double valk release + gives them the additional “new year” symbolism for a new part. (and they didn’t want to wait an entire extra year).

#honkai impact #hi3 #asks #elysium ever ranting

[lexart-io]

hi! I'm a fan of your work and am trying to learn ai myself, could you tell me a bit about your process? keep up the good work :D

thank you! everything i do these days is rendered in automatic1111 stable diffusion, run locally on my computer (on my nvidia rtx 3060 gpu w/ 12gb of vram). i train my own base models with kohya trainer XL and LoRA models with kohya LoRA trainer XL, both of which i usually run on google colab (on an nvidia a100 gpu because training models is a lot more resource intensive than rendering images).

most of what i do is less about the text prompt and more about the models used. in fact, i tend to recycle through a lot of the same text prompts over and over (with only minor changes to them) as i test out the models that i've trained. i think the most creative part of working with ai is in training models. text prompting is just the surface of it, but training ai is where you're really starting to create something that no one else can exactly replicate (unless they literally steal your dataset and settings). it is an extraordinarily fascinating form of creative expression that is unlike anything in human history... basically wrangling a blank slate machine intelligence to do your bidding by teaching it.

i do a lot of experimenting with the datasets that i use to train models. some are trained on more specific subjects or aesthetics, while others are trained on more symbolic concepts. then i combine these models when rendering images (the nice thing about LoRA models is that you can combine many models in a single text prompt). when i find combinations that seem particularly cool, i'll render a whole series of images and use those as a dataset to train a new model. then i'll combine that model with other models and sort of continue this evolutionary process of training and retraining models, using datasets comprised mostly of previously rendered images.

the datasets for my earliest models started with things like this (i would just slowly collect random cool images that captured a vibe that i liked, categorize them with other similar images, and eventually train a model on that specific vibe):

whereas now they're usually trained on images i previously rendered that share a specific vibe.

training models is definitely an art form itself... a lot of very delicate settings, how/if the dataset is tagged (the process of describing what is in each image to help the ai identify what it is analyzing during training), the specific images that comprise the dataset (1 bad/confusing image can sometimes really negatively impact the resulting model), etc. this is a whole HUGE subject that i could write FOREVER about, but i'll spare you (and myself) the endless wall of text haha.

anyway, some final gritty details worth mentioning about the workflow of actually rendering images and getting as much coherent detail as possible out of it: when i render something i like in automatic1111, i'll usually re-render it with hires fix using the LDSR upscaler to upscale it x2. some models don't play nicely with upscaling (and things can come out warped), so i'll either try again at x1.5 or x1.25 or try reducing the denoising strength (i typically like to keep it around 0.5). assuming the model(s) used do play nice with upscaling, i'll sometimes then send it over to the "img2img" tab and upscale it again x2 using the "SD upscale" script with the LDSR upscaler (denoising set to around 0.3 here). occasionally i'll upscale it x4 one last time using Real-ESRGAN (and then resize it down to something normal, since by this point the image resolution can exceed 10,000x10,000 pixels lol), which can help to smooth out any rough textures. the final step is making any last adjustments in photoshop - things like contrast or cleaning up noise / stray pixels.

hope this helps and hope it isn't too much of a mess to read haha. i really tried to condense as much of my process as i could into something as short as possible (i actually deleted 3 paragraphs during this because it was getting way too deep and i don't want to burden anyone with a boring novel of overly specific details). there are a lot of tutorials out there regarding everything i've mentioned here; reddit and youtube are probably the best resources. if you have specific questions on anything though, feel free to reach out! i'm always down to help folks get into this.

#stable diffusion #photoshop #digital art #ai #artificial intelligence #generative art #ai art #synthography #ask

[femenaces]

[it’s already being used to program entire websites and applications that used to take months to build in just minutes] this isn't happening. maybe extremely simple html/css skins and one off js/python/whatever scripts but i know for a fact it (chat gpt) can't actually, Actually program.

once again: it is not intelligent (it cannot THINK), it's just an extremely advanced web scraper. you give it pieces and it tries to match them. that isn't thought, it isn't "intelligence".

also your og argument was like, "ai is removing our ability to think and be human!"...i mentioned ai art taking effort to show that no, actually, you do still need to think about what you're making it do. you are still learning...picking up a book on composition and reading it so you better understand what makes an image look good is doing. and even then actual artists will have a better understanding of what makes something look good! they should integrate ai into their workflows to make things easier.

also also i have literally seen ppl on twt take your posts word for word and claim them as their own. you're already being consumed i'm afraid. artists also copy other artists all the time. this isn't anything new from a logical standpoint, it's just happening quicker now

Again, most of what you are interpreting as me "not understanding" is actually us disagreeing on a fundamental level. The exception, as you picked out, was my statement about programming. I misremembered the article I read and you're correct, as of right now, AI seems to mostly only be capable of programing "html/css skins and one off js/python/whatever scripts," and the time saved is weeks, not months. Still, that's weeks. And as is the case with everything AI right now, the limitations it has today will not be present in the very, very near future.

"once again: it is not intelligent (it cannot THINK), it's just an extremely advanced web scraper. you give it pieces and it tries to match them. that isn't thought, it isn't 'intelligence.'"

I never claimed it was real intelligence. When I used the word "think" in the phrase "aims to think for us" I didn't mean it in the literal sense, I meant that the humans who use the technology will be handing over their real, genuine thinking to an, as you say, "extremely advanced web scraper."

Which brings me to my other qualm: I don't consent to having my creations, visual, verbal or otherwise, "scraped" and fed into AI algorithms. I suspect many others do not either. The fact that the only response to this complaint I hear from AI supporters is "well then get off the internet!" is extremely concerning. That's not an acceptable solution.

"...you do still need to think about what you're making it do. you are still learning...picking up a book on composition and reading it so you better understand what makes an image look good is doing. and even then actual artists will have a better understanding..."

No, reading about what makes for a good composition so you can recognize it in one of the images your talent-scraping computer program spits out is not "doing" in the same way that actually painting the piece of art is. And it's frankly disingenuous to even suggest that. Not to mention that a general ability to recognize good artistic composition is not a difficult skill, and most people have a pretty robust innate sense for this already, or else the average person would not be able to discern between a good painting and a bad painting. And like I said before, as AI improves, users will have to do less and less of this curating.

"they [artists] should integrate ai into their workflows to make things easier"

Creating art is as much a part of what art "is" as the final result. Your use of the word "they" to describe artists leads me to believe you are not an artist yourself. So kindly, shut the fuck up about what we "should" let AI do to our hobbies and passions and livelihoods.

"i have literally seen ppl on twt take your posts word for word and claim them as their own. you're already being consumed i'm afraid. artists also copy other artists all the time. this isn't anything new from a logical standpoint, it's just happening quicker now"

Who is reposting my words on twitter and claiming them as their own? I am fine with people spreading my writing, even without credit. But I don't accept people claiming to have written it themselves. I think this portion of your ask is the most telling. "You're already being consumed i'm afraid," you say, snidely. To that I respond that consumption is entirely different than plagiarism. "Artists also copy other artists all the time" Again, direct copying, aka plagiarism, in the art world is universally frowned upon.

I've seen AI lovers claim that all AI is doing is "taking inspiration." Not only do I disagree that a machine is capable of the abstract concept of "taking inspiration," not only do I assert that the mechanisms of a human mind taking something it comprehends and re-creating it in a new way vs a computer modifying a direct image input based on algorithms is not comparable, but I also think that non-human generation of "art" is not art at all. There are beautiful, naturally occurring patterns and formations in nature, but they are not art. Art is something humans do. It isn't just a product, it's a behavior. So yes, logically, this is entirely "new." And I oppose it.

Lastly, your extremely condescending follow up ask telling me I am "blowing my top" is hilarious. Yeah, I am. I think everyone should be blowing their top over this.