#i’m going to cry myself to sleep now

[a-dumb-sarcastic-bisexual]

Like the majority of society I’m obsessed with Nimona

And I rewatched it a million times and one thing always sticks out to me 

There are moments when Ambrosius is surrounded by light like a little protective bubble 

That keeps him away from the man he loves more than anything 

#nimona #nimona 2023 #ambrosius goldenloin #ballister boldheart #ballister x ambrosius #goldenheart #he always looks so small in these scenes #like the light is going to swallow him whole #it almost looks like a little kid wearing his parents clothes #like he’ll never live up to the expectations society has placed on him #this man is so lonely for the whole movie #poor baby had to figure out everything by himself #he looks so tired in the second picture #the thing that kills me is in the last scene he tries to leave the bubble #but Bal shoved him back in #bubba looks ethereal throughout the whole movie #this movie man #it kills me slowly #I love it so much #I’m gonna go cry myself to sleep now #people from the rise fandom know I only post angst when I’m sleep deprived

[potato-jem]

i’ll be honest, i had my doubts about the casting of the rwrb movie.

but the way nicholas smiled at taylor in the poster made me realise that he is literally the most henry person that could have played the role

#and now if you’ll excuse me lads i’m going to cry myself to sleep 👍 #henry is an entity in my mind and i was gonna be so critical of nicholas #i mean he could still be only half decent #but i have more hope now #and hope is all that matters #rwrb #red white and royal blue #red white and royal blue movie #rwrb movie #prince henry of wales #henry mountchristen windsor #alexander claremont diaz #alex claremont diaz #nicholas galitzine #taylor zakhar perez #casey mcquiston

[dreaminofu]

Jere and Bojan most likely are having their weekly calls in the evening when both them are free and can unwind. Maybe sometimes Jere and Bojan are their last conversation before they fall asleep 🌠

Yes 🥹 And do you know what happens when one of them falls asleep before the other? They always whisper the things they’re too afraid to say out loud when the other is awake to hear them.

I wish things were different. I wish we didn’t have this stupid fucking continent between us. I wish you were here in my arms. Did you know that sometimes I sleep in your shirt? You know which one. I wish I could stay there, always. I wish you could stay here, always. I wish I could call you mine. I wish I was brave enough to tell you, but it would hurt too much when I have to leave again. I love you. Mä rakastan sua. Ljubim te. Forever.

But what they don’t know is that often the other isn’t actually asleep, but he’s listening to every word, silent tears trailing down his cheeks, thinking

I wish that too. I want that too. I wish I was brave enough too, but it would hurt too much. I love you too. Mäkin rakastan sua. Tudi jaz te ljubim. Forever.

#pls don’t come at me if i messed up with that ”I love you too” in slovene i consulted google translate #i’m gonna go cry myself to sleep now #sad bojere bitches support group #bojere

[wideminded-dreamer]

and when Jake makes a post about MSG you will never hear from me again

#what if dusty was on the other side of the stage and caught a photo of the twin moment and that’s the photo Jake uses #(sorry Val) #k now I’m gonna go cry myself to sleep because I’m so proud of these boys

[starlitnyx]

so was nobody gonna tell me that Saint deactivated or 😕

#I’m sad now #Gonna go cry myself to sleep /hj

[imperpetuallylost]

kinda crazy but…

im gay for you

:o no way i’m also gay for u <3

#also i’m fucking exhausted it was a long ass day of robot #i broke down crying for no reason in the middle of my last tech interview for drama #because i was so fucking stressed abt hosting the robotics comp this weekend and waiting on college decisions #and also two of my friends were like in the hospital at the time #one bc they hadn’t eaten in like a week because of an ed and we’re doing really badly #and the other because they had to get stitches bc of sh #but i couldn’t really explain alllll of that to my drama teacher #anyway #i did hear back from one of the schools tho!!!!! and i got in!!!!!! #but they didn’t give me as much money as i would have needed to commit there #so like i probably won’t end up going even tho i really loved the school and it’s kinda my top choice #and also the accepted students days all conflict and i ended up signing up for one that would mean id miss the end of district champs #for robotics if we qualify #which my hopes are vaguely high this year #but now i’m gonna have to miss part of it if we do :///// #and the other more competitive one i’m waiting on hearing from some time this weekend i’ve been checking the portal like every twenty minute #it’s really bad #anyway i’m gonna go take a shower and then go to sleep before i drive myself to another breakdown #idk why the tags of this ask was my place to say all of this but it sure was

[intofolkloreee13]

If you told me two years ago that i would become deeply emotional over SPORTS i would’ve laughed in your face

#aftg and beartown changed something in me for the worse or the better idk #what is IN these books?? #they make me feral #and it’s SPORTS #i am a wreck #i stayed up way to late to finish us against you and i’m going to go cry myself to sleep now #benji ovich i love you #aftg #beartown

[curiosity-killed]

Shoutout to my friend who watched me go from “I feel like I’m going to throw up” to “I think I’m going to have an anxiety attack” to actively hyperventilating on the floor in the space of 1 (one) minute and somehow responded effectively.

Significantly less of a shoutout to my body for APPARENTLY having the exact same physical cues for both “going to pass out from low blood sugar/dehydration” and an anxiety attack

#things I’d rather not learn about myself! especially with an audience! and yet!!! #blegh #I’m fine now and ran the piece again but Jesus #today has been rough lmfao #everything hurts and I’m exhausted #also I haven’t had an anxiety attack since college #and literally don’t know how to resolve them aside from my college method #which was hyperventilate/cry in a secluded bathroom while imagining The Worst Possible Scenario #accepting it as fate and then walking out completely numb to the world #which is! not a great solution!! #hhhhhhhh #okay #showering brushing teeth going tf to sleep #personal

[myfriendtheghost]

goodnight my beautiful lil dork

#I am. very afraid for this week lmao 😭 #my roommate is home and I have to drop the news on her that I’m moving out #which would be very normal and understandable under most circumstances #especially in this situation because she will soon be making $30 an hour and our rent is only $550 a month lmao so she can afford it easily #but …… she is so terrible to communicate with <3 and does not like spending money <3 so I’m afraid <3 #I just have to keep reminding myself that it will be worth it #I’ll be happier #I’ll be working towards my goals #I HAVE goals for once in my life LMAO #it’s going to be okay I just have to get through the bad parts first 💕 #on top of that I also dread work tomorrow lmao #BUT!!!! #I had THREE SEPARATE PEOPLE contact me for photography jobs today !!!!! #one of my aunts is having me photograph her crochet pieces so she can sell them online #another aunt (who owns a popular local hangout spot) is gonna have me photograph an event at the end of the month #and I got invited to photograph a CHRISTIAN MUSIC FESTIVAL ??? #LIKE OKAYYYYYY #my emotions r everywhere #and now I want 2 cry over josh being the prettiest ever like omg #anywho I am exhausted !!! love y’all sleep well

[emmafallsinlove]

it’s almost like 18:00 and i haven’t eaten all day

#i’m the worst of keeping track of doing these #and like. it’s not because i want to starve myself or anything #but i woke from sleep and my brother did something that scared the shit out of me so on top of that i am sitting im my room #literally crying because i don’t know any other way to deal with shit #and my mind feels like it’s about to explode #i probably will go make myself something to eat but im shaking i can’t do anything i just want my sister home #or speaks now

[warriorsatthedisco]

Man I used to sympathize people with chronic illness, but now I can really empathize. This shit sucks and it has the worst snowball effect too.

#helped my friend with her art booth at a con this weekend and it wasn’t even like a ton of work but it fucking exhausted me so much #I think I pushed myself too far because I also got sick and now I feel like shit and I’m so so so tired #and of course this is with steroids. like the drug that gives you energy to do shit and I’m barely functioning at work #I’m going to up my dose to 30mg bc the doctor said I could. cause even at 20 I’m still getting crohns symptoms #nothing like picking up groceries and feeling sudden impending doom where you have to get to a toilet as soon as possible #and then being so tired from just picking up groceries that you don’t have energy to make food #so you just lay in bed but you can’t sleep because you’re in pain and it’s hard to breathe from this stupid cold #this cold shouldn’t be kicking my ass but of course my steroids are immunosuppressants so it’s like I have fucking Covid #(I don’t have Covid) #and then crying because even on the steroids I still have to follow this stupid miserable diet because apparently #my body just fucking hates all good food #including goddamn rice #RICE! #not to mention the fact that prednisone can make your vision bad and it’s been making it hard for me to read even with my glasses on #and the foot cramps. idk what that’s about but I’m drinking so much water and taking supplements #anyways. rant over. hope I can work tomorrow. I accidentally slept thru my alarm today and was an hour late #personal

[quibbs126]

*sigh* and I’m back into “college panic mode” mindset, because I was too damn lazy to do stuff when I should have, and now I can’t build my full schedule because no classes are available, I don’t know what else to fill it with since I don’t really know what I’m doing with core classes, but also I need a lot of hours to make up for me dropping like 7 credit hours last semester, but I don’t know what to fill it with

Not only that but payments are due on the 18th (though from past experience I can be a bit late on that?), and looking it totals to over $7000, so I need a loan but don’t entirely remember how to do loans. And I can’t just ask my mom, since literally last week my dad reminded me to start doing my loans, and I haven’t touched it since tonight when I was thinking about it. I was planning to do it last Friday! And I have no excuse as to why I haven’t been doing it and I don’t want to get in trouble

And classes start in literally a week, less than that since it’s basically the end of the day, and I’m stuck dealing with stuff I should have dealt with back in May, because I’m so damn lazy. But at the same time, I hate thinking about school during break, I hate thinking about school in general, since it just sends me into a panic and I’d rather think or focus on literally anything else

And now I’m stuck here, my eyes tired and wanting to do to sleep, but my brain going on overdrive in a panic over all this, and I just want it to go away

*sigh* I’m sorry, I just need to get this out somehow. I’d ask why college does this to me, but in reality I know I dug my own grave here. I don’t want to be in this mindset, to fear college so much and to sit here, knowing I need to do things but still watching the days tick by, still not doing anything, despite having all the time in the world

*sigh*

#I feel like crying now. Probably won’t #hopefully I’ve tired myself out enough to go to sleep now #but I’m not sure I have #real life stuff #college #me being a failure #maybe I shouldn’t post about such personal things #but heck it I don’t have anyone else to talk to about it #or that I want to talk to because I’ll just make people mad at my incompetence

[loveyourownsmiilee]

No but not to make this about Eddie and Buck but I’m going to. Because Eddie clearly didn’t have the best father figure growing up. He had an absent father and was made to be the man of the house at the tender age of 10. Buck also didn’t have the greatest father figure because his father treated him like he was a ghost living in their house. He never had the love and nurture of a father. Neither one of them did. Both were actually neglected by their fathers to some extent. And it really warms my heart how in spite of their upbringing, both men choose to be so loving and supportive of Christopher in everything he does. They both actively try their best to be there for Christopher and to never have him live a single day where he has to question whether or not he is loved. And yes I’m talking about Buck too because he does act like a second parental figure and he does help Eddie out with his son so much. They don’t want him growing up hiding his feelings and being scared of talking about his emotions. They both welcome and encourage it because they never had that themselves. And they both continuously try their hardest so that their son doesn’t grow up once questioning whether or not his parents loved him.

#buddie #evan buckley #eddie diaz #christopher diaz #the buckley diaz family #I’m straight up making myself cry right now #maybe I should go sleep #911 spoilers #jujus having thoughts

[catastrxblues]

good morning it is now 4 am and i have just finished watching atonement good night

#atonement #next tags are just going to be personal rants ignore that #i couldn’t sleep at all so i tried reading s&b and then fanfics and then the bell jar but it just didn’t hit #so then i tried writing but i just kept crying so i thought i’d watch a romance movie because yes #should’ve gone for four weddings and a funeral or pride and prejudice because what the hell is this #i didn’t know anything about this movie i just remember having it on my watchlist and saw ONE clip so i picked that help #and yes i ended up crying and the tears are still here but i’m also starting to think that that’s not entirely because of the movie at all #i stripped my bed off its sheets because the bright color annoyed me and it was already peeling off anyway and i was too lazy to put it rig #and when i pulled back from the screen after the movie finished and just look at how bare my bed is and how i’m in the middle of them #i just started crying again #and my legs are aching and i hate myself and i think i want to take a shower but maybe i’ll wait later on #i don’t think i’ll sleep at all honestly i’m not sleepy anymore #besides i’m thinking of going outside today just at the park i don’t know doing something #i always sleep really really late lately because my parents are out of country right now and no one is keeping me checked and i apparently #still can’t take care of myself. cried about that too it was something. why am the eldest daughter i’m so not fit for it #and then i always wake up at like 9 am and it’s already too late by then that i just never do anything productive #and it’s like i’ve been living in a simulation and i’m kinda going crazy and insane but it’s okay because today is going to be better #i hope because i’m not getting any sleep and i can finally go outside at 7 in the morning instead when it’s already way too hot #damn this is supposed to be one of the best years of my life??????? fuck off #also i can hear the azan subuh from the mosque by the neighborhood and i miss praying honestly #it’s so funny because i was happy to get my period because that meant i wouldn’t have to wake up so very early on in the morning #but i miss it now #hopefully my period will end soon #nadirants

[voiceshearingyouloud]

Finals really do something to me, especially fall semester finals. I’m not actively suicidal but I’m feeling the strong desire to just never have existed at all. So no one would remember me, you know, just like. Blink off this plane and not have to deal with stress and chronic illness and pain and the three separate fucking times I’ve got PTSD.

#well. gonna sleep now #I haven’t been eating well and I think my body is going into hibernation now I went out for dinner for a diner burger #I can still feel my blood sugar recovering an hour later #but I’ve been sleeping 4am-1pm so g-d knows if I’ll fall asleep or not #tw suicide #suicidality mention #like. I’m fine I just hate this feeling of having some horrible thing going on emotionally but I can’t actually feel it cause I’m so #dissociated from stress #like I’ll cry for a second often but I can’t get myself to properly sob for five minutes and get it out of my system #it’s horrible. #but as soon as I get this one essay done I’ll be free to see my friends and my partner after christmas #so that’ll be lovely and healing #anne speaks

[cowgirliee]

Sure for me it’s just a Wednesday and I’m in a bad fucking mood but I gotta leave that in the parking lot because it’s literally their childhood and I refuse to negatively impact it

#I’m peptalking myself right now #crying screaming throwing up I’m in such a sour place today I didn’t sleep good I wanna go hoooooome