#idk but those are my thoughts on this situation

[overrgrown]

stray my stand in thoughts in no particular order (e1-7 spoilers) ~

sorry it's long lmao I have a lot of jumbled thoughts that I need to yell about so this is me screaming into the void

Joe being used as a stand in by ming and tong is very telling

ming honestly doesn't act like a spoiled rich brat. he's occasionally entitled, but he's very polite to staff and he genuinely cares for his sister.

I don't think that ming wants to hurt his sister. he wants tong to choose him instead of his sister so that he can break her heart instead and then ming isn't to blame

idk if ming was ever trying to be subtle to Joe about what he was to him. he flat out told him he was a stand in (just didn't mention for who)

Joe getting a second chance at a maternity figure only to have her immediately fall into major trouble and then health issues has got to be triggering the fuck out of Joe rn

do we find out where Joe 2.0's spirit is at all? and what happened to OG Joe's body??

jfc poom is so pretty I can't focus

ik sol and ming are more than likely gonna become friends at some point but my messy ass would LOVE to see them be bitter bitches to the end with each other

where did ming get the chain....?

it's making me so fucking sad that Joe is falling back into his previous direct footsteps bc of his situation and its literally all he knows to do. same people, same habits, same mannerisms, same career, everything

he has an opportunity to completely rebrand and live his life without being under ming's thumb but he is consciously choosing to stay around him. why? what is so alluring about the person who used and emotionally cheated on you for who knows how long and then drunkenly called you the target of his actual affections????

Joe is not only too humble. I think he genuinely doesn't think he deserves better. this life is all he's ever known and he's never had the stones to try and improve himself and get his own life

his job is literally to be a nameless, faceless body double who does the work for a person who gets to take all the credit

(not that I'm shit talking real stunt doubles. y'all are the core of my fave action movies and ily)

but it says a lot about Joe's character and how passive he is usually and it's so interesting to me that he's the big risk taker when it comes to his stunts but he's too scared to make a move to improve his life or branch out on his own

those inconsiderate little bitches. you can't just add a character willy nilly to an already finished script. it'll throw off the whole movie and that's way more work for the writers

yo that hesitation at Joe not being able to break those mugs???? I felt it physically that was GOOD FUCKING ACTING

sol has never done anything wrong in his life he could murder someone in front of me in cold blood and I would help him cover it up

I would come out to sol i trust him with my party drink I'll go to war for him

damn bro how the hell did Joe get roped into being a stand in for HIMSELF that's some meta shit right there. like how is this not just self harm bc that's what it seems like to me

tharn? that's a new name. will we meet him?

ming's condo being green and gold like Joe's old house I am chewing on fucking concrete

OH THE MIRROR SWIPE THE HARSH REMINDER THAT HE IS IN ANOTHER BODY AND THAT HE IS USING THAT BODY AS A STAND IN FOR HIMSELF AND THAT HE NOT ONLY SOLD HIMSELF TO MING BUT HE SOLD JOE 2.0'S BODY GOD THAT WAS *chefs kiss*

is the backception here that ming is kissing Joe 2.0's back bc it reminds him of OG Joe or because it reminds him of Joe reminding him of tong hmmmmmmmmm either way: seek help babe you have a problem

the juicy juicy parallel of ming waking up to an empty pillow I'm gulping this shit down like water this is my life blood rn thank you for the delicious meal

i am not immune to the mesh shirt

AHA I THINK I JUST MET THARN

Update: I am correct

JOE'S ACCIDENT WAS A SUICIDE ATTEMPT?!?!?!?!? holy fuck bro

I thought I was going to hate ming a lot more when I started this bc I have a lot of manipulation trauma but I kind of.... get him

how old is tharn supposed to be bc he looks 16 and it's unsettling

I knew we couldn't trust that twink

YAS BABE YOU LOSE YOUR SHIT YOU YELL YOU GET MAD YOU TELL PEOPLE TO FUCK OFF YOU KICK THARN OUT OF YOUR ROOM DESERVE TO UNHINGE YOURSELF A BIT

ming is about to step off the edge I can feel it this man is about to overflow and drown everyone around him in his search for Joe

"tOng PlaYed tHe scENe hImsELF" oh so tong has always been a piece of shit got it

shut the fuck up why am I actually getting emotional over ming realizing that his Joe is the one in front of him and that it's been him all along

but on another note I am going to pound him into the cement for interrupting that shoot I hope the footage wasn't ruined by ming's emo ass

the back hug with the clear JOE though and comparing it to their first meeting?? stupendous no notes

up is going in a bubble I am kissing his forehead he acted the fuck outta that last scene MWAH

#my stand in #my stand in the series #ming x joe #joe x ming #up poompat #poom phuripan #sorry i had many things to say and no one else to yell to so on the public internet it is lmao

[thebirdsareafterme]

With all the talks of contract signings at the moment, the narrative of SAINZ TO AUDI are resurfacing once again. While Audi has been looking promising, people need to realize a couple things.

1. It’s still Sauber for another year. We’re talking 2026, not 2025. With the new regulations coming in, it’s going to be a big transition for the team, considering they’re changing ownership and the car by a significant amount. This could mean absolute chaos internally, as the team hires new employees, relocates old employees, etc. The transition from Sauber to Audi is going to be quite interesting to watch, starting with the Hulkenberg swap in 2025.

2. Historically, Sauber has been a place where careers go to start or to die. Look at the last few Sauber drivers. Kimi Raikkonen, Antonio Giovinazzi, Marcus Ericsson all ended their careers with Sauber, and it seems that Valterri Bottas and Nico Hulkenberg will have one of their last contracts with the team as well (potentially). Carlos is at his peak right now. He’s in his prime, he’s 29 years old and he’s winning races. It doesn’t make sense for him to sign with a team that can’t guarantee points and certainly not wins. He’s not signing his last contract, he still has another 5 years at least (unless he pulls a Fernando Alonso). That’s 2-3 more contracts. Moving from a backmarker team upwards is a lot harder than the other way around. He would need to perform spectacularly in the Audi to get the attention of the leading teams again, unless he wants to spend the rest of his career in the midfield.

3. How much change do you think the Audi takeover is actually going to bring to the team? In the past, Sauber teams have always been in the back to mid field. Audi taking over won’t guarantee a change in this, considering the leading teams in F1 right now have been at the front forever and ever. The only thing Audi can promise is to move up in the midfield. Becoming a competitive leading team in F1 takes years of good results, as seen with RedBull.

Audi is only coming in with a new power unit, not a whole new car. That means they’re still using the same engine, chassis, etc. We saw the fun activity called “Sauber Pit Stop” this season. The team members and the technical portion of the car both need to work in order to have decent results, and it seems that this year, they are struggling with both. The team is struggling for points, and wins are not even on the table. For Carlos to see their insane (read: bad) pit stop times and incredible (read: also bad) race results and consider joining them is a bit strange. TL;DR, Audi isn’t going to miraculously change everything that’s wrong with Sauber. That could take years to fix.

4. Has anyone actually considered if Carlos wants to go to Audi? Why would Carlos move to Sauber in anticipation for Audi if there are other teams that want him as well? Mercedes have been eyeing him up, Redbull have stated they would love to have him, and he is by far the most desirable driver on the market right now with more wins than the majority of the backfield drivers. Any team would be happy to have him, but Audi just seems to want him more because of his familial connections.

“Oh but his dad drives for Audi!” Yeah, that would be cute, but let’s consider the future of Carlos’ career here.

“But Audi is great in Rally! They won and everything!” Have you considered that Rallying and Formula One are COMPLETELY different sports?

“He should just sign! He’s wasting everyone��s time and he’s going to end up without a seat if he keeps stalling!” My dude, we’re not even at summer break yet. Chill. Just because we’ve had some unusual silly season activity very early on in the season doesn’t mean the season is ending any sooner.

#carlos sainz #carlos sainz jr #f1 #formula 1 #Audi #sauber #is this a hot take? #idk but those are my thoughts on this situation

[emberglowfox]

closing time

#you know situation's dire when sparks breaks out the color block sona vent art LOOOOOOOL #sparks speaks #vent #again to all my new-ish followers i do post stuff like this from time 2 time PLEASE block one of those tags if you don't want to see it #long post #edit: fine to rb idgas #ummm NEway. i go back to college in like a month and the thought of it makes me want to curl up and die. idk if i can do it again tbh lol #i dont know how i survived the first time #<- LYING he does. and it was by letting the dissociation he is currently bitching about swallow him completely #if i really committed and tried i could probably claw my way out of this. but there's really no point when i'll just fall back into it soon #the forgetting my entire life does suck though. it does suck. #its really cool learning you've lost the only thing you thought you couldn't lose. #anyways. i'm fine im chillin i just. needed to get this out #if youre reading this preciate you. drink water

[puppyeared]

i feel like. theres designing a character with certain themes and motifs in mind, and then theres making a gijinka for the water bottle on my nightstand

#me when im the only person on the bus wearing a mask: i should make a furry plaguesona #its hard to explain bc. most of the time i try NOT to give my characters a 'strong' theme like making their whole design around #one thing like apples or even broad stuff like baking or cottagecore.. idk if its partly for flexibility or because i cant imagine them #making it their whole personality. not bc i find it cringe or overblown but more like ive learned to associate design with character depth #i had a cutesy uwu persona for most of highschool because i thought it would make me more. likeable? easy to remember? since #memorable character designs are easy to recognize. and one way of doing that is simplifying it with a theme or symbol so you form an #association. but since im a real person its exhausting keeping up that appearance all the time and denying myself things when they dont #fit my 'aesthetic' or 'theme.' i think ive grown past that bc i just collect stuff because i think it looks cool and dont let myself dwell #on how it might 'fit' with my image. but i cant help feeling bad doing it to my own characters bc it feels like im making them too one #dimensional. despite knowing that theyre not real and design alone doesnt reflect depth i cant help feeling like its wrong #despite that i love seeing motifs because it feels like it reflects the characters soul and paradoxically gives them depth. it makes them #interesting to look at too and honestly its pretty fun combining things that fall under a similar category when designing #i struggle find a balance between those two things #actually this reminds me of noelles christmas theme.. i dont remember her saying anything abt liking christmas despite a lot of #her design and character tying back to it. it makes me wonder if she would have feelings about that or doesnt think abt it too hard #or if its like a matching family shirts situation and shes just going along with it?? #maybe i should just do whatever i want with my character designs since theyre not real and im thinking abt it too hard #although. this probably has something to do with deep seated identity issues huh #yapping #oc talk #oc

[tojisun]

just got stopped by the transit security (normal) and then got pulled aside (unusual) because apparently i look older now than i do in my student id (it’s linked to my bus pass) like 😭 cmon man thats my face four years ago ofc i look older now

#sun rambles #the id even has date issued so yk do the math 😣 #they thought im illegally using my ‘previous’ student account to buy the student pass 💀 #just the overall set up of this is stupid. u fining ppl for using any available resources? its the same shit as not being able to use ur #student acc to have access to research articles when u graduate #its such a weird situation like yk i paid for those at least give me 10 years post-grad still or smthn #idk i just didnt the day right and the bad vibes are accumulating

[lemongogo]

can i ask.how u guys practice ur creativity <3 how u practice ur imagination or like.. how u experiment with ur art, how u come to ideas and how u develop them.<3 pretty please <3

#smthing i have always struggled w.is feeling like i can only draw things that r handed 2 me. #as in.an idea or concept that already exists #chara or conflict that already exists.Scene that alr exists. #and i think it can be soo limiting bc when i have that sort of creative desire but nothing 2 reflect off of it #i feel like im unable to do anything/get anywhere bc im unable to do that mental legwork myself ykwim #like comic artists r SOOO JAW DROP INSPIRING TO MEE bc not only are u envisioning ur own sequences/situations #but u are able to imagine even the most MUNDANE interactions within those scenarios u know #like the transitory panels and the quiet moments and the every day stillness #and i feel like.its not even a poor attempt on my behalf its like.i cant Even attempt it.like my brain is soo empty #and soo static and noiseless that i am like gauhh...... #i can practice lines all day long and practice colors and practice anatomy or Whatever bc its something concrete #and its in front of me and i can pry apart the physical technicalities until i understand it better #but my MIND???ABSTRACTION>? THOUGHTS .ough its so hard #and i really want to push past that but i dont know how and its so .. demoralizing to think that ill get there One Day but i feel #one million and two days away.and not making active process towards it. #i know the first step is to build ur visual library and i feel liek. idk i FEEL LIKEEE theres more 2 it that im missing #but also im depressed as hell n my job is killing my creative drive and the seasonal stuff isnt helping #so maybe i just need 2 give it time (true) but i also like.man i dont know. i want 2 do something w my hands #but everything ive been doing so far has felt soo .hard and fruitless and i definitely dont want 2 turn art into such a stressful thing #fruitless as in like.i dont get any personal satisfaction w it.idgaf abt monetization or algorithms or any of tht #but smtimes thats just what happens and i have 2 weather through and know ill be more equipped 4 this some other time #SAWRYYY IM ALWAYS GOING ON AND ONNN im nromal im normal<3 i just rly like art and it sucks balls whn it feels out of reach #sigh cry fart scroll.(:salute:)

[my-current-obsession]

I finally saw the Naruto Road to Ninja movie last night, and I gotta say, it was really good! I went in knowing it had quite a bunch of Narusaku ship tease and wacky alternate versions of the Konoha cast I knew and loved, and then got hit by surprise by all the family drama and feels.

Really I'm surprised and disappointed there's not much discussion or content related to that movie (especially among Narusaku fans, since this movie is an obvious goldmine!), but maybe I'm just coming to this topic years late and missed it.

#naruto #narusaku #the way this movie contrasted naruto and sakura's family situations just to then flip and/or parallel them was SO GOOD #and the way they got virtually identical scenes of just... walking through konoha witnessing parents & childs while they were ALONE? #with sakura's scene used to explicitly make her realize that damn. naruto has had to live with that his entire life? #idk if i can properly express my thoughts but. it just feels like this movie did a great job... #of interweaving narusaku's friendship and their different experiences with the family drama and how that changed in alt konoha #like. those could have been two entirely separate plotlines. but they weren't. they connected and entangled together #and it was beautiful

[084392]

eternal life

imminent death

#pokemon xy #trainer calem #trainer serena #xerneas #yveltal #OK TBH im not sure these specific situations are part of like....my hcs? or anything?? i just. thought it would look neat? #idk #anyone else think its fun how xerneas has those little x eyes while being the one that represents life...? #also the drops in the 2nd pic were supposed to be tears but i think the red may make them come off as blood which. #at this point? im going with it. whatever... #my art

[wazzappp]

Sometimes I feel a weird sort of guilt for having periods of time where I'm way more into the au content of a media than the original. It feels like I'm not paying enough respect to the original?? Somehow???

Then I remind myself that I can do whatever I want and media is supposed to be enjoyed.

#I WONT FEEL GUILTY FOR ENJOYING THINGS. THATS DUMB. THATS D U M B #its also kind of part of why my au posts are so detailed?? i want to show thst i love the original enough to put all this time and thought #- into making some sort of branch off i guess. is that strange?? i dont really care if it is but yk. curious. #if anything i feel like it helps me maintain my love for a thing longer. i like putting that guy in situations #AUs let those situations be LIMITLESS #delete later #idk still figuring my dumb brain out

[da-proti-toku-grem]

why can't anyone understand that everyone is different and not everyone likes the same things and that it's completely okay AND normal for someone not to like going out and preferring to stay at home :/

#honestly i understand that my parents care about me and they don't want me to be feeling bad #and that they ask me bc they just want to make sure i'm okay #but i've explained to them what i feel like and they just don't get and i get mad but i akso know it's not their fault and just... oughhhhh #like yeah i have a weird kind of social anxiety according to my therapist and even she doesn't know exactly how to help me yet #but there are just so many reasons behind why i don't like going out and it's not just bc it gives me anxiety #or why those situations give me anxiety in the forst place #1. i'm just a very introverted person that doesn't like going out #2. crowded places/closed spaces/places where there's not enough ventilation/loud places (be it people talking or just music) overwhelme me #3. all said in 2 + flashing lights give me huge migraines that can linger for over 3 days #4. i am very much a night owl and i'm forced to live in a society where that isn't fucking acceptable apparently and i'm called lazy for - #- not being productive in the morning when the only reason behind it is that i am a lot more productive at night #but no one ket's me do that bc 'why are you doing stuff when you're supposed to be asleep?' #i have been the same since i was little. literally nothing has changed #and people where always like 'oh she's just shy' #but idk wtf changed #maybe it was that i became and 'adult' or maybe the fact that i started therapy and they told my parents that i have social anxiety. idk #but suddenly every single person in my family is worried about it and they're genuinely making me feel like there's smth wrong about me #i mean. i have my problems i'm not gonna go telling you that i'm perfect bc i'm pretty much not #but is there really smth that wrong with me that i need to fix #or is society just a bitch that doesn't understand that there's different kinds of people and everyone is different & IT'S COMPLETELY OKAY #have they ever thought about the fact that maybe these situations cause me anxiety bc i've been forced all my life to do them #even if i don't like them #instead of thinking that i don't like them BC they cause me anxiety?? #i mean. i know i have to go out more and that there's tons of things i can do ofc #but you can't just force me to do things i don't want to and put on a good face while doing it *every.fucking.day* #aaaaand i could add a lot more things but i'm once again reaching the tag limit so i shoukd just shut up #it's just driving me crazy bc i know they're trying to help but it really is not helping at all............. #ranting

[noahtally-famous]

not me popping back on here with a post after months of semi-inactivity (uni is being a bitch) just to reiterate how much i love writing the pahkitew island cast.

aside from sammy and amy (obviously), literally everyone else can be shipped with one another and it'd make sense to some degree, like it takes skill to create a group of people so inherently shippable (platonically and/or romantically) and ofc the writers didn't know it they just shoved a bunch of random ppl together and dusted their hands off on it but fr tho 😭

(yeah im planning out my leonave 'stranger things inspired' au, and the gears are turning, and i forgot just how much i love writing for this dumbass group)

(i swear im working on the next chapter of a guide to surviving the apocalypse too)

#no but i've way too many ideas lmaoo #i forgot ive a whole longass post in my drafts dedicated to ramblings abt this longfic and i came across it today ahaha #like amy leading a manhunt for leonard bc shes got everyone to think he killed her sister (who she didn't even like much smh) #and topher's one of the ppl involved and when shawn hears he's like “topher? yeah i can handle him dw” (possible tophawn minor pairing??) #and leonard's abt to get the equivalent of being burnt at the stake literally #when guess who shows up in a fucking mercedes of all cars #fucking dave #and he helps leonard escape narrowly by driving fast af and leonard's so confused bc like “i thought you'd be with those guys” #and get this: dave doesnt believe leonard killed sammy bc of his vehement belief that leonard doesn't know magic LMAOOO #and leonard doesnt know whether to be affronted or grudgingly thankful bc if it wasn't for dave's desire for everything to be normal #leonard would have been part of the witch trials 2.0 #and idk who's watched st but the plot is somewhat inspired by it #like shawn goes missing first and dave as his best friend is panicking abt it (in this one axel is shawns cousin???) #and then when they find him at last the weird deaths start leading to leonard finding sammy dead and this whole situation #and theres a whole different world underneath them and its up to leonard dave ella and sky to team up and prevent certain destruction #and theres slowburn leonave (with pining leonard and oblivious dave) #and leonard lives with his uncle whos understanding of his passions (unlike his dad who basically gave him away for the same reason) #and leonard's life is total opppsite from dave's #and they both know it #and omgggg this au has been a brainrot for so goddamn long #but idk why i just got a slew of ideas for it today #and like dave stays over at leonards at one point and leonard gives him his bed (like a gentleman) #and the next morning shawn barges in like “wheres my best friend” bc ever since he was taken he's been v paranoid abt losing the ppl he lov #and he hugs dave and daves like “how dirty are you rn” and shawns like “nothing yet i waited so that i can hug you when i see your dumb ass #and everyones like abt dave to leonard “idk if he's the right one for you” #but then later on dave saves his life by going a little bit unhinged classic dave-style #and ends up scaring a nurse and receptionist into retiring early #total drama #td leonard #td dave

[ant-diary]

I think I have maybe decided to tell someone I no longer want to be friends with them, but I'm wondering if I should give it a few more days before I commit to it

#anthill #pretty much everyone except the one mutual friend I have with this person has said I should #the one friend said that what she did was shitty and could I understand if I did #but also thinks that it is something that we could maybe work from #I'm not really asking for advice I'm just processing my feelings out loud #I kind of had a revelation about boundaries today #and I've been really blaming myself for not being firm on mine and letting this person cross an emotional boundary #but that doesn't exist in a vacuum #I can say no to things and often do #its when substances or I guess in this case horniness is involved that creates problems #if she were completely platonically cuddling I would have said no to anything further #but with reasonably doubt adjusting positions turned into active grinding #and when she asked if she could touch me further I said but that will turn me on so idk #it wasn't an enthusiastic consent #which she only got after continously grinding on me #and like the situation that my ptsd is like hey this is just like this other time #involved someone asking to make out 3 times which I said no to consecutively until they got me crossfaded #its not a not setting boundaries problem so mu h as not recognizing patterns of behavior that people employ #until they can dubiously get my consent #and needing to learn those patterns #also saying 'be firm on your boundaries' is about as helpful as saying 'don't be anxious' #like wow! I've never thought of that before! youre a vissionary thank you! #like I don't blame myself enough.

[cervideity]

Are there any FS manga ideas you've had which you haven't really seen anywhere but wish were more common?

RUBS MY HANDS. ok so bc i havent been here that long i havent really seen even a fraction of all the fan content for this thing (although i comb through oldER threads, fanworks, and deviantart fairly often) so i cant say anything on it not existing... plus this is pretty basic

but onw of my fav concepts i dont see utilized too often is pairing off two of the 4/maybe5 guys and putting them in a damn situation by themselves. most of the time , at least the fancontent I see has them all together, by themselves, or paired off like they were in the manga. which is FINE. maybe im just geared different. but what better way to enjoy their characters like its new. what better way to analyze . fuck you scoops up red and vio puts them in the Labrynth with devious creatures. .yaknow?

just for you anon N9BODY ELSE LOOK !! /joke. some very * rushed in the fervour of inspiration * [badly drawn] concepts for a green n shadow dungeon

#i once read a pretty good fic about blue and vio getting separated from the others in a dungeon and they had to fight a dark link. good shit #fandoms so small the person who wrote that may be reading this post.. hiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii if so. #hope the she/her shadow doesnt bother ya because it shall CONTINUE TO HAPPEN !!!!!!!!!!! #hashtag girl /ref #i may be a hypocrite bc i dont put out as many of those situations as other just. various drawings. i think but . yeag. usually if i have a #truely Unique n singular thought i try to draw it and then i leave it. or else. the creative flow. desolate. #OH FUCK YOU MAY BE TALKING ABT INTERPS.... IF SO. UH. idk. #pretty adamant on my “vio talking abt being a hero when he betrays shadow is an indication of the inverse'' interp. thats why my first post #of em is named heroic nature. bc its Actually talking about shadow #smiles deviously #also you can ask me to elaborate on any of these anon ... if u want.... believe it or not this is me holding myself back

[jacksprostate]

sorry this is once again my monthly 'i'm in love with people and our capacity for compassion even in the face of deep deep cruelty, even though i've seen worse and worse things, come to terms with so much, it's my love of humanity that has let me avoid rotting, encouraged me to grow and chase my own place in helping everyone around me" post

#im really excited for the job im starting. still about a month or so out but heading towards a career change sort of that im really excited #for. im just... i actually used to be very cynical and i struggled to see the point through all the terrible things in the world #but for many reasons #even as i discovered worse and worse things #ive developed... resiliency i never thought id have #born out of this appreciation for those and the world around me #and i wish i could share it. i see so many people in my old shoes #im still growing. so much to do #but im at a level of contentment.. idk. i couldntve dreamed of #and it took effort #it is not /easy/ to face things and believe in good regardless #but. its rewarding. i wish it for all of you #on a similar but different note ive been reaching a point of being more myself in social situations rather than just a chameleon #and ive been lucky enough to have the people around me the past two years or so be very supportive in a way that has truly let me grow and #become a better version of myself #and its sort of been this positive feedback loop. because the more confident and passionate you are the more people are delighted by your #eccentricies #i used to be so beat down #i still struggle so much #but. im at a place i never thought id be #no doubt there will be struggles in the future #hell its not like things are perfect now #still so much. major things to improve on #but idk. i am happy #and its a very full sense of happiness. #full and aware and strong #thats what i wish for all of you :)

[gobstoppr]

and btw im in my hater arc rn. as time goes on the more i find a lot of 'fandom' stuff insufferable (i like art n stuff. just the way that fandom refits every media to fit a single mold and set of boring archetypes is exhausting.)

i just get really easily annoyed lately. and have been unfollowing people on a whim a lot. its not personal i promise

#fandom culture has made me actively dislike shit i was fixated on a year ago. looking at your ninja turtles #its not even like what they were doing were particularly offensive it was just exhaustingly boring #im sorry i just really dont care about ur 2 million fics about leo being a sadboy. or one million seperated aus. #theres definetly a part of the whole situation in general which has been me coming to terms with my own internalized misogny #actively re-examining my tendencys to gravity towards male characters #idk maybe its making me dislike art more. but idk. ive always analyzed why i react certain ways to certain things. this isnt new for me #anywaays. i had been following a bunch of ninja turtle blogs and they sorta kept messing around with shows like ninjago too #and at some point i was just like. i dont know if these shows are actually that good guys. i think youjust like shows for little boys #and fandoms tend to shaft female chars so it sure helps that their casts are 98% male . #maybe theyre not your blorbo maybe theyre just Guy McAverageMan. thats not inherently bad but you have to consider it. #guys rottmnt is isnt even that good . its not that good ok. its alright/pretty good. and the movie does a few neat things #i feel like ive become one of those people that turn 18 and then immediately go 'minors dni'. im not there yet but i just. #we're watching kids shows. its ok . you can say it. #you may have noticed ive been reblogging a lot of dungeon meshi stuff. i read it all over the past week. #but here's the thing. i thought it was mid/good for like 70% of it. #i think its got some really really cool worldbuilding ideas and stuff #but i think a lot of the writing was sorta. uninteresting to me. #my discord friends have been raving over izutsumi for months. #but i found her presence in the story to be weird and underdeveloped. she felt out of place and her introduction felt clumsy #i felt when the story was ramping up the manga got a lot better. because again theres some rlly cool ideas at play #all the shit with the lion? incredible. the way all the infighting led to more problems bc the elves refuse to explain anything? rlly good. #marcille landing in power? reallly good shit. (i still thought it was a lil undercooked still tho) #i cant stop thinking about laios in that climax scene. i think he shouldve been feral a lot more often #uhh. i got distracted. fandom bad and annoying. #saw a post talking about marcille realizing izutsumi is only 17 and then describing how 'omg shes a mom now' and i wanted to throw up #im done. i swear. im done talking for real. aagh #text

[derpinette]

morally i am against bras but i cannot commit because the moment i feel any type of movement against my nips i feel like lopping my entire breast off Skoptsy style

#sorry for the graphic imagery but this is how that truly makes me feel #even just feeling my heartbeat there when i lay on my stomach triggers me like AAARGHHHH i have to get up & shake it off i feel so revolted #& IDK how to fix this or if it even can be in the first place Am i just doomed to this life of Stupid & Baka #( *DIES of disgust due to remembering those pictures of runners with bleeding chafed nipples* ) ( MY WORST NIGHTMARE. ) #the reason i wear a bra is not even for support the band is always too big & i can never get the straps to fit me either #either always falling off my shoulder or too short which make my bra ride up ( my situation RN ) honestly never had one fit me in my life #so i just put them on for warmth & to put a Barrier against Friction. T_T #TBH i should just wear tanktops instead because i have no practical need for bras either anyway & those could work #but unfortunately i got rid of almost all of them in MIDDLE SCHOOL -_- #except of course for my thrifted epic swag H&M black tank that fits me perfectly *-* so yay. just need to find more of that cut & size... #totally freaked out one time because i thought i permanently loosened it when i had only started wearing it recently after all these years #but na it just needed a wash. ♯yay ♯Grateful