#ik realistically im probably not but i just

[voulezloux]

.

#idk how to tag this but it’s about my dad who i just went NC with bc he’s abusive and hasn’t changed #so if you don’t want to read keep scrolling i don’t care i just need to fucking do something #i’ve passed rage and now i’m just sad #and i feel bad about being sad bc i don’t want to be sad bc being sad SUCKS #i feel like i’m burdening my friends by telling them the shit my dad did to me #ik realistically im probably not but i just #only three people would truly understand the situation #my mom my sister and my childhood best friend #my sister is off limits bc i’m not putting her in the middle of this again #my mom was also abused by my dad and i don’t want to trigger her or make her feel bad so i don’t feel like #i can always go to her about this shit #and i don’t want to take advantage of my best friend’s listening ear even though she is being supportive of me and everything #like i just feel guilty and i feel like im burdening others with my burden #i want it to all stop i just want to stop being sad #i want to stop feeling like im 7 year old me hiding in the pantry from my dad #i don’t want to go to work i don’t want to do anything really #and it’s not like i want to die i just want to stop feeling like this #i want to stop feeling like i somehow fucked everything up when it was my dad’s fault #ik i should book another therapy appointment but i can’t with the way my week is next week #and idk i’m just #im not having a good time #i’ve taken an ativan every night this week bc of all this #previous to this idk when the last time i took an ativan even was #and i’m not trying to read into it too much but its hard not to when ive gone literal months without taking it #and now i’m taking it every night so i don’t stay up half the night bc my brain won’t shut up

[sunlit-mess]

how delusional can you be as if it's disrespecting

#messyr #ok? is there something wrong with how I cope in media bro #look- if this is about the whole aroace thing- I DO respect it- I'm cupio myself. But this is fiction- #realistically speaking there is no harm. they don't feel. they are NOT REAL DAWG #the community can cry about it but who are we really entertaining here lol #im probably missing smth but I try my best not to draw much intimacy or any seggsual stuff at all or that I keep it to myself or #private media #I'm just trying to enjoy things and Ik im not hurting nor disrespecting anyone. let's not make it a bigger problem- ight?

[bangcakes]

.

#personal #keep being like. if Only i had talked to him sooner. if Only i had been Friendlier sooner. but its like #Realistically.... probably wasnt ready. and also like. itd have to happen after school was over anyway bc 1. um i need to focus on school #and 2. how Awkward if i asked him out n he said no. or say we broke up or soemthing #like there were weeks i saw him every day. aint no way... i could handle the awkwardness of that #so ok ok ok. everything is fine JFJFJKFKFKFMFMFMFMFMF #i just have to remember not to get in my own head about it #like if i wanna message him i just should..... #its just..... hhhhHHhhhhh whyd this have to happen to me at 29. i could have been a happy spinster thank u NFJFJFJFJJFJFJFJF #but now ik what having an actual crush is like and oh wow is it painful. but also beautiful n fun. i just...... and lets face it this is #more than a crush. like its definitely Like like but i dont wanna say the Real L Word bc it seems..... idk JDJDJJDJD #but ive definitely um.... fallen. ya. ew JDJDKDJKDKDKDKDKS #but im just gonna follow my gut or whatever the fuck has been guiding me bc things have worked out so far #and like it wouldnt have without his participation. like ya.... #im just like... what if he Forgets about me or like everything fizzles out #but then its like i Know if i see him again itll all come back. #bc in the summer i tried so hard to get over him (and kinda succeeded)... only to see him again in class and be like oh fuck oh no and the #n That Dinner. that was the final blow. i was so overwhelmed i got lost on the way home #which... the restaurant we were at is less than 10 mins from my house so you can imagine the uh Overwhelmingness #i cant even remember the original point of this but. i think we'll find a way ....... i say we but i should say 'i' bc until he tells me #that he likes me im gonna have to like Not Assume. hhhh #it doesnt help either that ppl were bringing up 'hes just not that into you' on twt bc Now im like #oh God. am i in that kind of situation???? i doubt it tho. i think hes just reserved. GAH. whatever happens happens

[vamptastic]

it's just like. okay. when i say i like men in a gay way and women in a lesbian way i don't mean that i think straight attraction is icky or my attraction is somehow more enlightened and progressive. i mean that I've spent the formative years of my sexuality in a place with my gender presentation where people are equally as likely to see me as a man or a woman and often seem to think of me as both, and i cannot separate both my attraction to men or to women from that. ive always felt drawn to butchness because its this concept that your love for the same gender shapes your gender presentation and vice versa, but it's specific to womanhood and attraction to women as a woman in a way i can't entirely relate to. like, in many ways i am both a man and a woman, and i am attracted to both men and woman in a way both shaped by and reflected by that fact.

#there's not really a clear label for that is there #i suppose i don't need one it's just to have that cos you can find similar people #i suppose bisexual as a gender is the closest i can get #like both sexes and also attracted to both sexes and those two things each are linked to and affected by the other #i don't know. i expect my feelings on this will change as i transition and people start to really see me as a man #and not the in-between ive been in since puberty (thank you pcos combined with massive badonkahonkawonkadonks) #it's just sort of frustrating to feel like nobody gets it #like lesbians are into me cos they think im butch #a specific type of man-autistic nerds (affectionate)-seem to just see me as a regular ol woman #and when confronted with the reality that i am not seem to not really care either way about my gender #other trans people are into me and they do generally get it but not always #and gay guys are into me sometimes but i don't really pass consistently enough for it to happen often #like im not actively seeking a partner n i don't both passing day to day cos everyone knows im trans already #n binding is a living hell when you're fat with a fucking. idk the size like E or F probably. cup size. #so mostly ppl approach me thinking im butch but occasionally ppl think im a guy in photos i post and such or #strangers will ask my friends abt me thinking im a guy #but like generally speaking no matter what i don't get to just be A Man. and i don't know if i really want to be! i like being trans #and it sucks because ive missed out entirely on dating in middle/high school like when you find out who you like #simply for being trans. ik most queer ppl end up doing it all in college its just frustrating yk. cos all my cis friends get to do it #realistically speaking im p much just t4t i really only have actually tried to date trans people + trans people are hotter + they get it #which im fine with. i love trans people . just sucks to be excluded sometimes even when u don't want in

[nerice]

chensoman anime is so overproduced....

#this is a salt post abandon reading here if ur alrdy annoyed #// #went back to look at jjk and jjk just looks amazing. it looks very polished. it goes hard but also holds frames and let's them breathe #cs/m is moving too much somehow in a suffocating busy way #& im not bashing the cgi here. yes it's clunky but anything that can take the crunch off of animators lol #like some of the awkward angles and rotoscoping is the fault of being too close to the cgi they obviously used #they somehow managed to make an anime equivalent of AAA hyperrealistic games that feel bland bc of it #not always!!! ofc!!! but im saying the hyperpolish doesn't add anything of value esp to a property just as cs/m #& i know fujimoto is a movie buff n this is probably his dream adaptation n whatever #& i know anime will never look like in the olde days again #but i am thinking of akira animating on 1s and making the busy look work #i think of the hyperreal movements in satoshi kon movies and how he makes it work #chainswman wld have been better off looking like klk this is the hill i die on #not saying it needs imaishi's animation style and sharp chins and yelling. but the feeling klk had #of dark and grimy fights that went with scratchy and decidedly drawn lines in their fights & copious amounts of blood #& i do like the stark contrast red blood in csm! it just does nothing style wise since the rest is so Realistic. it's just red #in the end its an adaptation but i would have liked it to stay closer to the feel of the manga. the endings Get It #& on that note i also don't like the soundtrack that much. ik the discordant stuff Fits but vs katanaman was the first time #that it actually integrated well with what happened on screen. (again compared to jjk or klk that had impeccable osts) #bg music not op/ed ofc. tho none of the ending songs have been all that stand out either #anyway!! this has been my salt!! #csm blogging #still preferable to a bad adaptation i guess (sighs at fnae...) #but i do hope jigokuraku next year will look worse (lol) bc nobody cares abt that show/manga so they'll not go all out #and i do hope they will not Improve On (tm) jjks current style bc i need my toji moment to fuck me raw #good morning and goodbye

[nomaishuttle]

also did you all notice. that im off work b4 4 😊

#ITS SO YAYYY I GOT TO CLOC OUT AT MT ACTUAL CLOCKOUT TIME (330) #liberty is like. already entirely finished LOL... thank gd for having a full staff* #*fiona wasnt here today but fiona only works until like 12 usually so. #vut yas.. now its kinda awk bc im like... im gonna have 2 start actually doing laundry 😭😭 #instead of judt helping 2 sort clothes and doing end of day rags.. all very scary. #i HATE folding im so bad at it... ik realistically ill probably just be pulling clothes But i dont want to . i hate pulling vlothes itd be #fine if it werent for fitted sheets my Archhh fucking nemesis. #everything else i can roufh fold that eaaaasy bc pulling you basically uust. you drape it over the sides of the thang so it can get proper #folded... the sheets r too big so gou fold them which is fine for the flat sheets but hey? guys? have you ever folded a fitted fuckingsheet #THE DEVIL. THE DEVIL. OOOOF THE DEVIL #nicha tried so hard to explain she was like so you take the corner you fold it over your right hand you take the short side corner opposite #it fold that and that i like grt its where you pull the long side opposite up that confuses mee #ik its not that big of a deal but im like mom?nim scared

[squishious]

it is such a wonderful feeling to know just how loved you are

#some of my (extended) family makes some. questionable choices #sometimes they are not fantastic people #but almost every one of them (some more than others) are so demonstative of how much they care and how much they would do for me #and it is truly just so so nice #here is a little list of nice things people said and did yesterday bc i am feeling grateful and want to remember this #- one of my favorite aunts (technically my dads aunt and my great aunt?) has been so supportive of what im studying and helpful #in that pragmatic desi aunty kinda way #- her son (uncle of all time seriously he's the best) was the one person with whom the college talk wasn't misery inducing #he was so so nice and reasuring and understanding of ~the situation~ #didn't bat an eye at my crazy list which. god i appreciate so much #tangent: ik it's not realistic to get into all these schools but if i apply to them all something's gotta stick #and i hate people seeing the list and being like. mhmmm wow ambitious....r ur parent's forcing u to do this #like bestie no i just know my funky little humanities degree is not super valuable in the first place so i need that name brand #okay anyways #stressed how much 'grades don't fuckin matter' in college #how it was not only ok but normal to digure out post college plans later #and how living in [redacted] and having classmates doing the clear path fields probably makes it 10 times more successful #and said if i ever needed a destress chat to just call him #icon #oh his wife and i talked about piercings and she told me a story about how her found her brothers bong when she was in college and #asked her what it was #uhmm oh! rich cousins!! the older one esp (not the fashion one) (who was also honestly rlly sweet) has always been a lil intimidating but #she was so nice today? gave chill college advice talked to me about other stuff which. thank youuu #what elseee #oh my god. their dad #he is. a character. not always everyone's favorite person #not always the kinda person the adults are on good terms with #but no matter what drama is going on (none this time afaik) #he is always absolutely lovely to me #squish speaks

[lovers-eternal]

spoilers!!!!

now about halfway thru mistborn, my thoughts so far:

i LOVE vin, she’s everything i want out of a complex female character. she has just enough of the “annoying” teenage attitude to feel realistic. she’s stubborn and headstrong.

also love the father/daughter dynamic between vin and kelsier, at first i was worried it was going to turn into some weird like teacher/student romance but we’re safe from that, phew

so idk if there’s any romance going on in this book, but im hoping to see elend & vin have a enemies/lovers moment. love a forbidden romance trope. kelsier definitely has his hands full with vin. ik some people hate the “omg ive seen him twice and im in love with him” but lets be so real that’s how teens are LOL

i do get kelsier’s mistrust in the nobility, but i think there’s possibly rebels who feel the same way as him. the nobles seem to be just as policed and watched, maybe even more so, by the lord ruler. yes they’re privileged and treat skaa awful but how many of them act out of fear?? also cmon an ally like that would be a game changer

wtf is going on with these Keepers? why would the lord ruler use them. why store this knowledge if to hide it from everyone?

why is the continent covered constantly under ash? was it done on purpose by the lord ruler? does the volcano have some connection towards this eleventh metal - hence why it’s kept active by some magic? does it tie in with his immortality?

i have a feeling there’s going to be some betrayal i get blindsided by, kelsier has faced it before & vin lives in constant fear of it. but… who will it be? ham seems likely now given his doubts about their army.

also marsh and mare??? maybe mare didn’t betray him and it was marsh trying to save mare from her fate. still angry with his brother’s recklessness, the fact that he got her over himself. was mare actively having an affair with marsh? or marsh just never won mare’s favor?

vin’s father. would he recognize her if he saw her? do they bare an resemblance? don’t know. but i have a feeling he will play a part in this. will he be sympathetic to his daughters cause or will he be disgusted?

there’s more i probably should add but this is what is off of the top of my head. this book is so hard to put down.

#mistborn #brandon sanderson #spoilers #no spoilers for me please #mistborn trilogy

[66sharkteeth]

more thoughts (positive for a change)

sorry to keep treating this like a personal journal when most of you are here for CoB content but it remains the 1 place where i feel semi-safe talking about things w/o blasting them to 10k+ people while also having more than 0 people listening

but just feeling a little hopeful for once! i got invited to speak on my 2nd ever panel today. it looks like it's a small convention and it's far too early to know if it'll actually pan out (not even responding today bc im trying to be more strict about giving myself wednesdays off), but it's still just...really cool that i'm actually being recognized as a professional and invited to things.

i still think so much about how when i was like.....12....or something, we had to do one of those like...dream life assignments. and i remember exactly what i said- i wanted to be a mangaka in japan with a studio apartment (yes, i was a very cringy kid. i called my friends -chan and -kun too). then i got older and more realistic. realized i could do art, but never my own project, and yeah, that's what i did for a long time.

yet... here i am now?!! granted, i never moved to japan (which i'm fine w/ lol) and it turns out studio apartments kinda suck and i much prefer a 1 bedroom...but i'm making a living off of that comic i came up w/ in middle school when had 0 concept of reality and how unlikely the chance to do that would be. and... i dunno! for a kind of rare moment, i feel like i can keep doing it (knock on wood)? if it's not obvious by now, i can get kinda doom and gloom about my future (and i wont even think about the industry as a whole w/ AI becoming more of a problem every day), but just for this moment i feel kinda optimistic?

i still have no idea what my future holds with webtoon. I have no idea when I'll have something ready to pitch again or if they'll even take it, but for once I feel like that uncertainty doesn't mean all or nothing. I kinda feel confident for once that even once CoB concludes on Webtoon, I can keep doing this to some capacity, whether that's through another series, physically printing CoB, somehow continuing CoB, I dunno yet. like i dunno. i think i'm just finally having this dawning realization that i am a professional? and other people see me as such? ik, probably a dumb thing to just now be realizing but blah blah, imposter syndrome or something, etc etc.

not sure where i'm going with this but just thank you guys for your support. if you're one of the like 100 people who actually follow me here, tbh you're probably one of my more dedicated readers, so thanks for being part of making this quite literal childhood fantasy dream come true. and shout out to the people actually inviting me to stuff on the super slight chance they actually follow me here. it seriously gave me kind of a reminder that oh yeah, i am a professional and good at this

#rambles #not cob

[imlivinginyourtrashcan]

Hi hey hello halloween was 2 days ago so here are my southpark halloween headcanons cuz im a spooky gremlin all year (Possible part 1 cuz i write alot and idk if tumblr has a word limit)👍

Cartman:

His costume is either really extra or really basic because he forgot until last minute.

Its usually inflateable like a dinosaur, pizza or...other things.

Usually the one to pick the route they go on when trick or treating so he can get the most candy, but it backfires because of all the walking.

The type of mf to eat his candy while hes out trick or treating (me too, i get it)

He steals the entire take 1 bowl you cant change my mind. Also the type to grab aggressive fistfuls when someone says to just take one or two pieces of candy

Thinks haybales and haunted houses are gay

Will throw fake decorations at you as a joke, but the realistic ones that make you yell (severed hands, bugs, etc)

His house isnt that decorated since i KNOW Liane is the cool mom who gives out full sized candy bars but its the inside that counts

Takes pumpkin carving VERY seriously. But doesnt do that much, or he tries and gives up.

A dumbass when it comes to candy trading. Always falls for the tricks Kyles got

Kyle:

I love kyle, but you know hes dressing up as the most basic things every year...hes TRYING THO HES TRYING

Takes Ike with the boys when hes old enough

Tries to match costumes with Stan but stan always forgets

The BEST at carving pumpkins. Gut feeling Kyle is an art kid.

Thinks haybales are gay but is "ironically" scared of haunted houses

His mom is extra with decorations. You just know it

Secretly takes 3 pieces of candy from a take 1 bowl

Gives what he cant have to Stan since he cant eat pork n gelatin has pork in it 👍

Cartman tried nabbing his candy once and he whacked him with the candy filled pillow case he had

Expert candy tracker. That man knows which house has what and he is ON IT

Nightmare before christmas enjoyer, will i explain? No

Stan:

Hes like Kyle with the basic costume thing, just worse. Way worse

He is a ghost...almost every single year cuz he forgets to go costume shopping and he just says "fuck it" and uses a white bedsheet

Takes what he can get; he knows Shelleys gonna steal his shit anyway

That doesnt stop him from trying to hide it

Likes haybales but TERRIFIED of haunted houses he will NOT get in one

Mediocre pumpkin carver at best

His house aint decorated nor does it have candy cuz of randys ass. Forgetful ahh

Kenny:

Cant really afford costumes so stan, kyle and cartman help him DIY costumes

Also the kind of mf to grab the entire take 1 bowl

Makes it his MISSION to get all the candy he can get

Kinda eh on Haybsles, LOVES haunted houses

His house is never decorated, his family cant afford that

Good at candy trading cuz he can do puppy eyes

Really good at pumpkin carving, he just cant be the one getting the pumpkins.

Horror movie FANATIC!!! HE LOVES HORROR MOVIES!!!

He dies a lot that day very sad for him

Butters:

Rarely aloud to go out trick or treating, mans is ALWAYS grounded

When he CAN go out he cant ever stay out late which sucks so much

His costume is always something cute/creative, bro would probably go as like, an oc of his one year (projecting so hard i did this in the 4th or 5th grade)

Gets people to check his candy for him, hes scared of getting hurt or poisoned

Wants to go to the houses that have fruit or toothbrushes. It always goes like:

"Can we go to Ms Firkles house?" "The one that gives out apples?" "Yeah!" "Fuck is wrong with you?"

Loves Haybales, thinks theyre so fun

TERRIFIED of haunted houses, will not even STAND in a 100 ft radius of a haunted house

Flinches/Cries/Screams whenever a halloween decoration jumpscares him or is too loud

Horrified of horror moves

Not allowed to carve pumpkins, too dangerous. But he likes painting them!

Obeys the "take 1/2/3" rule like a good boy

His house is decently decorated, nothing extravagant

Craig:

Oh you know he is a "this is my costume" mf

Either that or something space related

Always the first in front in his group (Tweek, Tolkien, Clyde, Jimmy and Himself) cuz hes pretty unphased by everything

Loves carving pumpkins, him and tweek do the cute pumpkin carving stuff couples do

Cant eat most of the candy since he has braces, but he gives it to Tweek so its not a waste

Will hold Tweeks hand during horror movies, haunted houses and haybales.

A six flags fright fest enjoyer

This mf will look you dead in the eye and pour an entire bowl of candy into his bag if there arent any cameras or signs

The kind of mf to joke inside a ghost tour and purposefully try to piss off the ghost by flipping it off

The most undecorated house ever. Its like halloween doesnt exist to the Tuckers

Tweek:

He buys cool costumes but his makeup is so shaky and rushed since his ass cant sit still

Chugging pumpkin spice like a maniac

Terrified of any and all halloween activities. Jumpscare him and he will scream

Doesnt take candy from people or bowls, he stands awkwardly behind everyone and investigates his candy thoroughly before putting it in the bag

Either that or he'll have craig triple check it

His house is always decorated since Tweek Bros always has halloween specials and stuff

Does not sleep for the entire month of halloween, he survives on pumpkin spice and pure anxiety

Helps around the coffee shop by refilling candy bowls and doing halloween chalkboards (they look like scribbled messes but whatever)

The middle man in the group, he doesnt feel safe in the front or back

Carries Pepper spray with him when trick or treating, always very cautious to the point his friends grill him for it a little. Better safe than sorry

Clinging onto Craig half the night, the insomnias getting to him

Legally not aloud to carve pumpkins. He will accidentally knick his fingers

Loves halloween baking though, he does burn at least something and panics.

Clyde:

Oh you know hes the kind of mf to dress up like the glow in the dark stickman

Grabs aggressive handfuls of candy regardless of if its from a bowl or person

An absolute crybaby. Will cry when he sees the decorations

They cant decorate his house since hes a baby

Likes the pumpkin carving tho!

Always runs to thr house with full sized candy bars

Jimmy:

He is def going as an inflateable t rex/banana

Tells more jokes to people in hopes of getting more candy

Carves a wee wee into his pumpkin. He thinks its funny

Pretends to be scared on haybales to make Clyde feel better

His house is the one with custom decorations its so great

Scary movie enthusiast, joking and calling the characters dumb the whole time

He. Fucking. Loves. Frightfest

Hc that when hes older hes a scare actor part time

Admires the decorations

Tolkien

Bro probably got like, a ren faire costume yk? Like a count or something

Tolkien just seems likke the guy to go to ren faire every year

Expert pumpkin carver

Takess his friends to halloween fairs every year

The most overdecorated house (rich kid core)

Always saying the thank yous and happy halloweens when noone else will

Bro printed out a map of their trick or treat route

He takes some of his friends to ren faire too. Craig thinks its gay as shit

Likes the haybales, and the shit rides at the halloween fairs

Creeped out by haunted houses tho

#south park #south park fanart #southpark #craig tucker #sp craig #craig x tweek #sp creek #creek #tweek tweak #sp tweek #south park tweek #tolkien black #tolkien #stan marsh #kyle broflovski #kyle brovlofski #eric cartman fanart #eric cartman #kenny mccormick #sp kenny #clyde donovan #sp clyde #halloween #happy halloween #happy halloweeeeeeen

[listerbirdloml]

this was probably from ages ago but some fun asks for you; favorite lister headcannons? [I]

OOH idk man i’m shit at head cannons ALSO THIS WAS SAT IN MY DRAFTS FOR AGES IM SO SORRY I THOUGHT I POSTED IT

- well in my mind i always read him with a northern english accent and i’m not sure why. i know he’s from kent like Rowan + Jimmy but he just gives off northern vibes idk. and after learning that his dads scottish i can also see him using lots of Scottish slang terms.

- i think he’s a slag for a bit of pop too. Britney, Ariana, Taylor, Reneé, you name it. he gets a bit embarrassed though so he turns off his AirBuds when he wants to listen to girly pop music. he has the widest music taste out of the ark, so his Spotify wrapped is always mental. he posts them every year and not once has the same song appeared in his top listened to

- ik he’s not like blonde blonde but i think his natural hair is a lot darker but he’s been dying it blonder since he first met Jimmy and Rowan. when the ark are on hiatus he lets it grow out to his natural colour for a bit.

- he tried to grow a stache one time but Rowan shaved it while he slept. Also he didn’t know how to shave when he first met Jimmy and Rowan, so Pierro taught him. Pierro also taught him how to tie a real tie rather than use a clip on one.

- Joan LOVED lister. she would always fuss over him when he would come over. When he’d come round he would help her in the garden, but really he was terrible and Joan would always have to fix his mistakes. when he told her about how he and his mum would listen to albums together when he was little, she began showing him her collection of old records from when she was a teen/young adult. when she died she left Lister a few of his favourites. Lister keeps them hidden at all times so when he was hosting parties there was no chance they’d get damaged. after they stopped having so many people over Lister kept them displayed in the living room.

- i think that before he and Jimmy got together he had healthy and fun relationship with someone unrelated. it’s not anything ridiculously serious but it helps him see what he should realistically be looking for and what he deserves. it’s not like he’s using the person though, and he actually really likes them. they eventually end things amicably though, and stay good friends.

- it says on the WIKI article alice wrote for him that he has three half siblings. as far as i can think there’s no canon information about them other than that, so i like to HC that they are all from his dads second marriage and they don’t talk much since Lister hasn’t been to visit his dad in years. the ages are;

1.) Lister (19-20)

2.) a sister who’s like 17ish, she’s super embarrassed about the whole ark thing and is reluctant to rebuild a relationship with him again when he reaches out to her post IWBFT, because she remembers how he used to constantly fight with their dad when he’d come over for christmas / two weeks in the summer holidays. when they do start to reconnect and get closer she helps him bond with their dad too. (maybe she’s called Maya?)

3.) a younger brother who’s 13ish and a total TWAT. they look really similar and he’s just like how Lister was in school but he’s hilarious and really admires Lister. somehow he’s stupid smart though, even if he’s class clown. i think he reaches out to Lister when he’s still in the hospital after the incident. i also think it would be funny if the younger brother’s celebrity crush was Jimmy but his image of jimmy is completely shattered when he meets him properly. (i call him Brodie in my head)

4.) his youngest sister who’s like 7 who barely remembers lister but once they get closer she has him wrapped around her little finger. he almost bought her a horse once but Jimmy and Rowan had to remind him that a 7 year old who lives in a city centre can not logistically look after a whole horse. (i think her names Eilidh)

- the ark move from the flat into a house just outside london and he makes sure they all have a room so they can visit whenever they want to.

- after getting to know them better, he gets really close with Angel and Juliet. the three of them and Bliss have “girls” nights in the arks flat. when Listers hair grows they teach him how to pleat it. he gets really good and when he starts seeing his half siblings again he pleats his sisters hair for them)

sorry idk man i yapped a bit 🤷‍♀️

#this was so much longer than i intended it to be #but you brought this horse to the water and by god was she thirsty #answering asks #i was born for this #iwbft #osemanverse #alice oseman #the ark #jimmy kaga ricci #lister bird #rowan omondi #bliss lai #juliet schwartz #angel rahimi

[concretepuppy]

sooo curious abt ur phallo i hope this isnt invasive. im transmasc and have considered it on and off for a couple years but its so hard to find pictures from YEARS later when its healed, people only post directly post-op. my biggest question is how it looks compared to a home grown penis. i like the look of a phallo shaft dont get me wrong but it's not really for me. if there were no options to make it look "realistic" then i probably wouldnt consider it

fwiw, my penis is home grown! it’s 100% my flesh and blood. ik what you’re asking, but for myself & a lot of other post-op people, the language used to talk abt our bodies is important bc we’re constantly getting dehumanized by the language people use. generally people say “natal penis”, as in a penis you are born with. all phalloplasty penises look “realistic” bc they are real penises!

assuming you’ve gotten glansplasty (creation of the coronal ridge so you have a typical penis head w a flared ridge), imo the only visual difference is coloring. phallo penises are generally all the same color, whereas natal penises have more blushing toward the tip & often have visible veins on lighter skinned people. for people who have medium-dark skin, this isnt as noticeable imo. but in fair-light people, the lack of pink at the tip is more apparent. there’s also a visible scar on the underside of the shaft, but once it fades it often just looks like a penile raphe. in general, regardless of skin tone, genital skin is often darker than other parts of the body, so some people’s penises are a few shades lighter than the rest of their genitals. mine is like this, but i don’t think it’s extreme.

in dim or colorful lighting, the lack of blushing isnt really noticeable, even on lighter skinned people. same w the scar. some people get medical tattooing done to add blushing/veins to their penis. i didnt. i know people who are stealth who did not get any medical tattooing and have never been clocked.

#concrete talks #answered

[manhuntwaist]

its kind of sad that all this made dream put a distance between him and fans and not tweeting anymore, i get his point and its probably better like this, im just glad we experienced the fun time inbetween, with all the dumb and funny tweets and streams when the fandom was at its height

the last year or 2 just feels like everything went to shit, apart from a few nice moments inbetween

i just hope next year we can go back to minecraft videos and dumb the clown nose stays on shipping posts, ik its not realistic but i can hope✌

#dreamwastaken

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

WIBTA if I told my friend I think they're making a mistake by moving/ am not up for a long distance friendship?

my friend(they/them) just started a LDR with their gf(she/her). they met ~3 weeks ago. they've met irl once for a weekend, after that they have been talking about moving out to her pretty much ASAP.

last week we were planning to hang out one day and I woke up to texts from them saying they were cancelling our plans bc they had started driving across the country to their gf at 3am to meet her kids because she expressed not wanting more kids (despite my friend having stated from the beginning of the relationship that they want to carry a child of their own and this is important to them, which she'd previously been enthusiastic about) this made me feel a bit abandoned (my problem ik) but also seems like a really bad idea and if anything a reason to hold off on meeting the kids because of a new found incompatibility. I haven't really heard from them all week. it sounds like they'll probably be back in town mostly to get their stuff before moving.

I'm not really sure exactly how this will play out, but my friend instantly started hanging out with me less and canceling plans as soon as they met, and I am kind of worried about them with how fast this is going, and kids being involved. my friend has repeatedly stated that I'm their "only friend", that I'm very important to them, want me to be there for their wedding and the birth of their child, and talked about me visiting them out there (I'm not really comfortable w this bc their gf is anti vaxx and open carries firearms which is a no no for me, my friend has also said they are uncomfortable with all that btw which feels icky bc they're rescinding boundaries for her). they even suggested me flying out there for my birthday next year ? which I found kind of weirdly insulting, like id have so little going on on my birthday that I'd want to go to the Midwest to be a third wheel and hang out with kids (im a bit younger than this friend in my early 20s and I'm uncomfortable around kids- they just find me boring and it's too much responsibility)

anyway the WIBTA - I want to tell this friend that I think this is kind of a bad idea, and that I'll be there for them if they are back in town - but that I don't plan to travel out to them or call/text much. we never text or call because we know we just don't work that way as friends, we've acknowledged this before - but they keep talking about how we'll stay in touch as if this hasn't been discussed? i feel disrespected by how unrealistic that is, I feel I can't really say a proper goodbye bc realistically that's what it would be and they're in denial of that.

Would this be cruel? I know it will upset them. it's not like im expecting to be able to change their mind, that was never realistic and this is their decision. but I feel like this is something I need to be upfront about to protect myself emotionally. but I'm not sure if my own anger from feeling abandoned for what I see as a potentially very bad situation (even though I know it's not personal) is clouding my judgement, and maybe I should just keep feigning being happy for them? but also I don't want to ghost when they leave, and I really am 100% sure we won't be able to keep in touch long distance. not just bc I don't want to - they started ignoring me when we lived in the same town and their partner was long distance - why would it be better in reverse?

What are these acronyms?

#aita #am i the asshole #anti vaxx and open carries??? where was she on january 6th just asking out of curiosity no reason

[peonycats]

(might become a block of text as i write sorry) do you have any thoughts on how bengal's personification(s)...work ? i am bengali but it's always confused me how to go about it. was there only one bengal before the partition ? would west bengal and bangladesh have a personification only after it ? i feel weird making bengal (if there was one before what we have currently, which... there's gotta be right ??) "into" west bengal or bangladesh cuz then i feel as though there's a very weird and at least somewhat offensive connotation on which one's "more/truly bengali" to put it lightly, ya know ?? but i can't see either of them really being born in the contemporary era cuz bengal's history is so ancient and vast ?? it confuses me sm i know i should probably just ask other bengalis but the ones ik irl don't really have strong views on this and i don't know any bangladeshis i can realistically ask this to 😭😭😭 im sorry if this has become an incoherent block of text

HEAVY DISCLAIMER THAT I AM NOT BENGALI OR SOUTH ASIAN!!

Tbh, don't worry about sending in a big block of text, I think this is an scenario/question worth considering. Basically, there are a number of ways you can go about personifying Bengal/Bengali nations, and each of them have their own issue, each of which have their own pros and cons, if my understanding is correct-

There was one original Bengal personification that was Hindu, but around the time that Islam reached Bengal and Bengalis began to convert, another Bengal personification arose to specifically represent Muslim Bengalis.

There was one original Bengal personification that began as Hindu and eventually converted to Islam, going on to become the personification of Bangladesh. No other separate personification arose to represent West Bengal/Bengali Hindus because this original personification still represents them.

There was one original Bengal personification that began as Hindu and eventually converted to Islam, going on to become the personification of Bangladesh. Meanwhile, another Bengal personification later arose to represent West Bengal/Bengali Hindus around the time of British imperialism and/or the Partition.

APPROACH 1

Pros + Reflects the current cultural division between Indian Bengalis and Bangladeshis

Cons - Lowkey justifies the Partition of the subcontinent by implying there were already personifications split on religious lines predating British colonialism

APPROACH 2

Pros + Reaffirms the artificiality of the Partition by there only being one Bengal personification representing all Bengalis regardless of religion

Cons - Does not accurately reflect the irl cultural divide between Indian Bengalis and Bangladeshis and the difference in how they view themselves

APPROACH 3

Pros + Reaffirms the artificiality of the Partition by there only being one original Bengal personification representing all Bengalis regardless of religion

Cons - By making the personification of West Bengal so comparatively young, this both inaccurately reflects the age of the Hindu Bengali community vs the Muslim Bengali community, as well as have subtle implications about which community is more "authentic and legitimate" based on this difference in age

Now, choosing one of these approaches will definitely depend a lot on what exactly you're personifying and the historical-geopolitical context at hand, as well as what messages you're not afraid to convey. For example, I personify Afghanistan as representing both Pashtuns in Afghanistan and Pakistan from talking to actual Pashtuns and how they view the border between them, as well as communicating the artificiality of the border. I think it's useful to recognize that the entire process of personifying a nation is basically mapping things like, a nation's ethnogenesis, rise to power, golden age, and eventual decline and destruction to human life events, is always imperfect and sometimes, the allegory falls apart; the Partition is probably one of the best examples of this.

As for how I would go about personifying Bengal? I would probably for a variation of Approach 1, where instead of there being multiple Bengali personifications split on the basis of religion, there would be multiple Bengali personifications split on the basis of regional and cultural differences. (Correct me if I'm wrong, as I am an outsider to this, but there are sub-groups and regional differences in language and culture even within Bengal, right?) Because of there being multiple Bengali personifications, some of them would be Muslim, some of them would be Hindu, and by the time of Partition, the personifications representing the lands of modern day Bangladesh and/or Muslim Bengali communities would move to join/represent the nation of Bangladesh while those representing Hindu Bengali communities would join India. This approach still has its issues, and may still validate/justify the Partition in the eyes of some people, but I go for it because it fulfill my most important conditions-

Doesn't make any of the Bengal personifications outrageously young

The Bengal personifications are personified based on regional and cultural divides that predate colonialism and imperialism

Them having to consciously choose sides post-independence and having to separate from one another accurately reflects the artificiality of the Partition and how it split up communities.

That's just my take, ofc, as a non Bengali and as someone who hasn't done as much research into the region as I'd like to, feel free to disagree and choose whatever approach feels most accurate according to you and your research!!

#ask #// long post #hws bangladesh

[bunnieshoneys]

is the thing abt coke and f1 parties true?? cuz f1 has basically 0 drug scandals (ofc i wouldnt put it past ppl to cover things up tho), and ik satoru wears sunglasses for light sensitivity but at first i got confused and though he was straight up stoned 24/7 and wore them to hide it like halston did (im a fashion nerd) 😭

oh girl

idk how new you are to f1 but yeah, the drug use is probably true, lol. especially in the early-to-mid 2010s/2000s, the party culture was slightly insane.

just last week james allison (mercedes engineer) made a joke to crofty about hiding all their cocaine in the car nose when crofty asked to look inside (on live tv, lmao)

f1 (and motorsport in general) is a very, very elitist sport, and very much a rich boys' club. sports for the rich in general tend to have this kind of culture (speaking as someone who used to compete in another very elitist sport, but not motorsport).

that being said my depictions of characters in coanda effect aren't inspired by any drivers IRL, or meant to be necessarily realistic. the sport in the early to mid 2010s had whisperings of drivers fainting, eating disorders, drug use, etc but there was never any fingers pointed at particular drivers in the press, because of the gravity of these issues, and also because if a scandal implicated one driver for drug use, it would probably implicate all of them.

the vibes of this in-club are RANCID and that's what i tried to go for in coanda. BUT THE FIC IS FICTIONAL LOL PLS DONT TAKE MY WORD FOR ITTTTT

#fic: coanda effect #bunny answers