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pesterloglog · 6 months

Text

Roxy Lalonde, Jake English

Act 6, page 4225-4226

tipsyGnostalgic [TG] began pestering golgothasTerror [GT] at 6:53

TG: holy shit jaaaje

TG: lol *k

GT: Heh heh.

GT: Howdy!

GT: What is all this commotion about?

TG: nothin

TG: just your basic run o the mill holy shit

TG: and also

TG: hi

GT: Ah ok then. Hello it is!

TG: also

TG: want 2 know

TG: what do you want for ur wigglin day

GT: Im not really abreast of the raddest jargon that the cool kids toss about these days.

GT: Maybe because i live alone on an island? I dont know but in any case are you referring to my upcoming birthday?

TG: ys

GT: I see. Very thoughtful of you to consider so early!

GT: I dont wager i could advise with much specificity but i can all but assure you i will find any gesture of yours to be totally capital!

TG: eeaauuuuurghh you are so fuckin adorable

GT: Um... *wrings at kerchief with perspiring mitts*

TG: YOINK nabs kerfief an stops RPing for rest of chat

TG: i was only bringing it up so much in advance because

TG: of the end of the world about to happen and all

TG: and then

TG: i wouldnt get the chance

TG: unless we play this game like a bunch ofsuckers obviously

TG: and all meet up in there and everything

TG: which would toytes kick ass

TG: *totes

TG: but

TG: if you want 2 know what i think..........

GT: Yes?

TG: do ya?

GT: I do want to know what you think!

GT: I always want to know. Because you are always smart and sassy.

TG: best dude ^^^

TG: neway

TG: i really dont think we should

GT: Should what now?

TG: play the game

GT: Why not?

TG: the barnoness wants us to

TG: * baroness

TG: i dont know why

TG: everything i know about it says it should be a good game and real important and itll let us all get togehter and do somethin great and be besf friends for maybe eternity?

TG: but she took all that and twisted it somehow

TG: all i know is shes banking on us doing this and if she needs us to do this than its got to be to make somethin fucking hoorible happen

TG: * horbible

TG: * whore bible

TG: ^ bullseye

GT: Well...

GT: Whore bibles notwithstanding i have it on terrific authority that playing this game will be incredibly important!

GT: So perhaps youre right maybe we are part of her evil plan? But does that also necessarily rule out that good will come of it?

TG: i guess not

TG: i just have a bad feelin

TG: maybay im just like this nutty ass bitsh twirling yarn from a shitwizards nappy brown beard but i cant bring myself to trust a cake sellin genocidal alien overlard sea queen

TG: * overl...

TG: n/m that santence chx out

GT: Agreed. :D

TG: so what is the itinerary again

GT: Intinerwhosit?

TG: regarding the game

TG: whosplaying in what order etc

GT: Oh. Is there such an itinerary?

TG: yeah i think so i think its going like

TG: i start with jane and bring her in the session

TG: then ds brings me in and you bring him in and them jane does you and closes the loop

GT: Where are you getting this intel? Did you guys make a plan or something?

TG: nah dont wory about it

TG: do you want me to set u up w the files now

GT: Ooh, these illicit hacked warez which i heartell were recently jimmied piping hot off the interclouds?

TG: ahahah i love that you were barely even joking with that statement bup yeah basically

GT: The silicon pickpocket strikes again!!! Whom is the wiser? Nobody.

TG: ffffffffff <3

TG: k ill send it but

GT: Yeah?

TG: jake

GT: What?

TG: jjjjjaaake

GT: !!!!!?

TG: youre wearin one of ur dumb computers now arent you

GT: Uh...

TG: you are all thinktyping at me right now while wearing something rudiculous

TG: * RUDEdiculous (hi five 2 self)

GT: Hogswallop! Why would you even think that?

GT: Thats so stupid.

TG: im not letting either of you run this file on your shitty brainwashy propaganda helmets or anything else u got to wear to run

TG: tis my one condition

GT: Fair enough. When i get back from my errand ill situate myself at the trusty old husktop. Acceptable?

TG: ys

GT: Then you have decided to play in spite of your reservations?

TG: i dunno i guess

GT: Bravo!

TG: dont all bravo @ me man youre just bravoing a big ass shrug

TG: i mean maybe

TG: i have every reason to want to play it

TG: im actually dying to play it ok

TG: i mean

TG: you believe me right

TG: about the bad shit that could hapen

GT: Of course i do.

GT: What sort of friend would i be if not?

TG: ok well

TG: dont say that to jabe

TG: *n

GT: She has her ways. I believe they are not incongruous with those of an intelligent and discerning young woman.

TG: ahh CHRIST waht a geneltman

TG: *fixfix

TG: i mean god daaaaaaaaamn

GT: Heh. I guess.

TG: but thats the thing with you

TG: you belvieve in people and also the things they tell you

TG: jane never believed my crap

TG: never any of my warnings about the baroness

TG: didnt believe any of the stuff about my mom

TG: and so on and so on and soon

TG: til after awhile i just stopped even trying to convince her hard or bring up any crazy shit

TG: because u know doing a lot of songs and dances to convince somebody who thinks youre jush shitting them all the time kind of wears on a friendship

TG: and who even needs that

TG: but you believe in stuff

TG: probbly because the more crazy fake shit you believe in the more open the world gets and the more chance there is for adventures being real right

GT: Right o! If a man believes hard enough in imaginary things then i dare say that makes them slightly less fake!

TG: yeah

TG: exaxly what im talkin about

TG: *exsexily *wonk

TG: *wink

TG: its one of those things jane likes about u so much

GT: It is?

TG: which

TG: errrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr im not supposed to talk about 2 u evr so nm

GT: Talk about what?

TG: nope

GT: You mean how um...

GT: Well a way in which i suppose...

TG: no nope

GT: Jane is prone to looking upon me with what i fathom to be more than just friendly affection?

TG: nope nope nope nope nope nope

TG: hey look who didnt say nothin about that why it is this silly fuckin drunk girl over here

GT: Its a tricky issue. And you know i adore jane and please dont think i havent given some thought to...

GT: Well that angle on our relationship i guess.

TG: ooof jake jake no please

TG: this is a conversation that cant happen cause i started it and i blew it by saying stuff so u have to foroget it

TG: * 4get it

GT: Oh. Yeah i can see the dilemma this causes for your friendship with her.

GT: Ill drop it.

TG: whew

TG: ok ont this topic

TG: i am now an forever

TG: miss zupperlips

TG: * zupperlups

TG: * ziperlups

TG: sjkhfskjf

TG: * MISS ZUIPPERPIPS

TG: fuck

TG: k this is me 4 futref

TG: ZIIIIIIIP

TG: ^+++++++^

GT: Haha oh my.

GT: Nothing is escaping that lovely ladys whistlemaker! Its shut tight as a drum!!

TG: mmmmrrmmmnnmmm

GT: Whoa wait i hope that didnt sound dirty...

TG: mrrmmrmmnnnmnmnmnmrnrmrnmmmm!!!!!!

GT: Ok but may i say this?

TG: mrm?

GT: If in the future i would like to bring up certain topics completely unsolicited by one who may be sworn to secrecy on those very matters...

GT: And im in need of i guess neutral and totally non compromising advice from a friend do you think that miss zuipperpips might unseal those scandalous metal choppers for a bit?

GT: Fuck that also sounded kinda dirty!!! God dammit.

TG: rm

TG: unzip yeah of course

TG: im totals your bee eff effsy jake

TG: i am like

TG: AT PEACE with that reality fromerly known as a raw fuckin deal for what avenues it closes betewen u and i that bein your bffsy has got to mean but yeah

GT: Wait what?

TG: i am just chill as fuck about being a pale friend to all varieties of cute and eligible as hell peeps

TG: do you see my shoulder and how it says hey friend plz deposit tears here?

TG: that is a LEGIT invite and is like sincere as fuckin BANANAS

GT: Oh. Im sure it is but i dunno how much crying im going to be doing...

GT: Probably none i think.

TG: no i know im just saying

TG: that

TG: ok im now spinning my wheels like a motherfucker but yeah the answer is yes

GT: Great!

TG: and not that im back pebbling but what about your best bro

TG: dont you get 2 talkin to him about girl troubles ever

GT: Yeaaaah...

GT: Well.

GT: Like i said the whole thing is complicated. Best not to get into it all until im ready to you know...

GT: Really start manhandling these bushel loads of prickly pears.

TG: prinkly pears

GT: The pears being the tricky subjects in question.

GT: Metaphorically.

TG: riiiight

TG: snickrz

TG: poor jake

TG: up to his neck in

TG: all the wopes

TG: * woes

GT: Nah its cool.

TG: speaking of which

TG: i heard hes making u track down his roboself

TG: to kill it or something for uranimum

GT: Sigh...

TG: and

TG: the AR disabled the novice setting???

GT: Yes.

TG: hahahahahahhahahahshshshjsjsj

TG: *hahaha

TG: u r so fucked

GT: Oh most certainly.

GT: I was actually just getting all of my final affairs in order when you messaged me.

GT: I was to bequeath to you all my WAB posters.

TG: wab wut

GT: Weekend at bernies dammit!!!!!!

TG: oh fuck yeay

TG: im always in need of something to put under my cats shit box

GT: :(

TG: ok tell you what

TG: as an early wigglin day thing u know what ill do

GT: I still dont really get the wiggling thing but no what?

TG: ill enable the brobots novice setting again for you

GT: Wow...

GT: Thanks i think???

TG: but that dont count as the whole thing ill think of something better too

TG: 4 now peace o jake & gl on your robroquest heheheh

tipsyGnostalgic [TG] ceased pestering golgothasTerror [GT]

#homestuck #roxy lalonde #jake english #homestuck act 6 #page 4225 #page 4226 #homestuck act 6 act 1

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kkuline · 4 years

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"𝚒'𝚖 𝚠𝚘𝚗𝚍𝚎𝚛𝚒𝚗𝚐, 𝚊𝚛𝚎 𝚢𝚘𝚞 𝚖𝚢 𝚋𝚎𝚜𝚝 𝚏𝚛𝚒𝚎𝚗𝚍? 𝚏𝚎𝚎𝚕𝚜 𝚕𝚒𝚔𝚎 𝚊 𝚛𝚒𝚟𝚎𝚛'𝚜 𝚛𝚒𝚜𝚑𝚒𝚗𝚐 𝚝𝚑𝚛𝚘𝚞𝚐𝚑 𝚖𝚢 𝚖𝚒𝚗𝚍" OST PART. 12: 𝚜𝚠𝚎𝚎𝚝 𝚗𝚒𝚐𝚑𝚝

#btsgfx #armiesnet #networkbangtan #bts #taehyung #ooooooomy godddd #im BACK bitshes #i wuv tete and i hope he knows how happy his music makes me #sweet night is so beautiful nd i've cried so badddd with it #tae's music feels like winter #not cold but like youre being warmed up from inside #so much that it makes you feel like you're on a different dimension #i LOVE him #so yeah this is late but fuck it #i really liked making this #it was funnnn #larystuff #bts.gfx #mine:bug

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takersmob · 3 years

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SEE 2PAC THINK ITS A GAME OF CHECKERS TO REMAIN ON TOP THATS WHY I HAVE TO TELL YOU AN YOUR LUH PUSSY ASZ BF THATS HOLDING DOWN THE CROWN OF NIGGAS FUCCING HIS BITCH FOR LIFE TO LEARN THE ADVANTAGE OF LIFE FROM A LOYAL STAND POINT MEANING NO SNITCHING AN POINTING OUT FLAWS YOU KNEW YOU WANTED TO STRESS WASNT THAT BIG OF A CONCERN SO WHAT IM SAYING DONT PLOT ON NOT PAYING ME YOU GOT BETTER PUSSY MOVES UP YO SLEEVE THEN THAT AYE I SAY GET THE GOVERNMENT OUT MY SHIT MY TEAM SIGN UP AN COME BACK IF YOUR BITSH ASS RECRUITS CANT LIVE UP TO STANDARDS BECAUSE IM STILL GOING TO KILL YOU

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just-some-random-blogger · 5 years

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The Soup

Super Junior Super Junior x SuJuMaknae!Reader Characters: Super Junior (ot13 [+ SJ-M]) Summary: Just like the way you need to give someone soup when they're sick, this is how SuJu reacts when you need them. Word Count: 1k+ Warnings: CRACK, fluff, humor, gnarlyness, etc.

A/N: i need a pick me up so i made this. It’s low key a part 2 to Secrets Of A Maknae, but not really because, well, it’s not HAHAHHAHA, but hello @farewellkorosensei, i’m tagging you cos u said u wanted a part two and i had a part two in mind but then i lost it so now you have this HAHHAHHAHA im sorry im like this

ALSO A DISCLAIMER

THIS IS FICTION IF YALL somehow THOUGHT IT WASNT

none of this is real bro that’s why its an au ?????? ok like ok

Being the only girl in a coed group that’s basically a boy group is not as bad as one may think

Especially since you're the youngest out of everyone, some people just cannot imagine how you do it

Sure like... being the only female means the testosterone thrown your way can be a lot

And there are just some things the guys can't and will never understand

Like how a woman's mind works

But through it all however

You loved being the baby princess

Because you have 13 knights at your side

anD IF EVEN ONE PERSON TRIED TO HURT YOU WELL

AHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHHAHAHAH

good luck to them

And in case you were wondering, SuJu is not as sweet as you think

LIKE YES THEY’RE OBVIOUSLY THERE FOR EACH OTHER BUT

here's how each member would react to you needing them

ps yall

dis shiz is HELLLAAAA LONG SO it’s under the cut

Being the eldest meant Leeteuk found everyone as his responsibility

BOY ESPECIALLY IF THEY'RE NOT EVEN IN SUPER JUNIOR LAJSIQBSUHWBSLAIDYLAWUDLKHKK;

and to you, who is in his group, their youngest AND only female member, he would drop everything for

Everyone who's watched korean TV knows this

cos yall do tv show hostings togther

and everybody knows how soft he is around you

like i mean he’s naturally caring towards everyone

and he’s normally high-spirited with others

BUT YOU TAKE THE CAKE

like you + him equals shenanigans like firecrackers

he does 8999+ dad jokes when you’re his co-host

someone save s.korea

but let us not forget is is the EPITOME of gentleman

he always offers his arm to you

he takes of his jacket or gets a blanket for you to cover your legs when you sit

errbody is like “stfu, we get it stop flexing”

you two are just like “??????????????????? bro fLeXiNg whUAT?”

“i get yall are married n in love but like. pls keep it under wraps.”

“BROOOO HAHAHHAHAH WE’RE JUST FRIENDS”

and then ????????????

mmmmhmmmm

we believe you

cos its all we can do tho

and i mean you two aren’t married but are so too tbh

ELF’s call you two the parents of SuJu

and think you two are sO ADORABLE IT HURTS

anyway

He is definitely the most understanding with you through the age gap you have

And even if he finds some of your actions odd due to that age gap, he always works through it and tries to think proactively

"What are you doing????????"

"IM DOING A CHALLENGE OPPA YOU WANNA JOIN?!" you say as you attempt to put on makeup with your non-dominant hand

THE AMOUNT OF TIMES HE'S WALKED INTO YOU DOING SOMETHING WEIRD IS BEYOND FATHOM

But if you need him

He.

Will.

Be.

There.

Doesn't matter if he's hosting 287378 tv shows at the moment

If you call because some loser broke your heart

He's taking the day off

If you call just to check in and he hears even a hint of sickness in your voice

biTCH MOVE OVER. HE GOT SOME PORRIDGE

He would take care of you even if he was also sick

He would find a way to go to you even if you were halfway across the world

You cant even get mad @ him cos you will and have done the same woops

IF SOMEONE EVEN TEST U YOU WILL BREAK THEM 4 LEETEUK

and obvi we have to add

his dog Shimkung prolly loves you more than him, just sayin

She runs to you and ignores Leeteuk when youre around

Because she loves playing with you

And she loves your energy

And the attention you give her

And the treats you bring

And because everyone loves you

And Leeteuk cant even because he loves you too

Woooooops

Yall listen up

If you think heechul is scary by himself

Try bringing up SuJu's maknae up

I dare you

Just mention your name

and he WILLLLLL EXPLODE

Doesnt matter if it's praise

He Will BE TRIGGGGGEERREEDD

there’s literally an entire 20 (and going) part video comp. of his ears steaming when you’re brought up

like the mere thought of you is already to set him off

It doesn't even phase him if the person who spoke of you is younger or older

The death threats he will sputter is limitless

his tongue is sharper than silver

And the deadliest death glare that's thrown may cause a heart attack.

strangely enough though

but knowing heechul, not strange enough

he is ALWAYS THE FIRST to throw you under the bus

during interviews

ESPECIALLY IF THEY’RE LIVE I CANT

and yall always bicker about the dumbest shit

everyone is like, “wait, they’re not the ones that are married?”

the answer is no

but honestly,

He's broken up with someone because of you

Because they were mean to you, i mean

And because he was tired of them too hekhek

and lyk Heechul may be short

But nothing is stopping him from getting into a fist fight with someone 1000+ ft taller than him.

Ok.

That may be a slight lie cos he'd prolly call the rest of the guys and 5672 security guards to be on his side.

would honestly fite anyone for you

any AND everyone to be honest

He's also very picky with your boyfriends

"Ya, he looks like a womanizer."

"Ya, he looks like an idiot."

"Ya, he smells like woman's perfume."

"Ya, he smells like cigarettes."

"Ya, I don't understand what you see in him."

"Ya, I can't believe you're wasting your time with him."

"Ya, why are your standards so low when you know a guy like me?"

"Ya,"

"Ya."

"YA!"

"You can do better."

and you’re kinda just like, “y dont u just look for a guy for me? or better yet, if you think you’re so great, why don’t you just date me?”

“pshhhh, as if, i’m too pretty for you, child”

is what heechul always says

to you and to everyone who asks why you aren’t dating

he also does’t ever answer your calls

cos he’s always too busy with his video games or selfies

so you get really frustrated when you call him to come over and he doesn’t call

but like

he’s somehow already at your house

????

cos you needed him and he knew that

????

idek either bro

he has a sixth sense with ya gurl

HE IS SUCH A DAD TOO

***NOT DADDY

DAD BECAUse

he will baby the heck out of you every moment he gets

but not in public cos his image

also he’s never one to flaunt even with his personality

he CUDDDLESSSS THE HECK out of you

and kinda makes himself clingy for the sake of endorphins

cos he is your happy pill

and your go to man when the world just sucks hard

he gives pretty solid advice

like the ones where you really need some

because he’s never one to sugar coat and will tell you youre a bitch if you are being one

and because of how he is, when he gets soft with you, you know he means it because he’s a broken brick most of the time

he’s also who you normally vent out your problems and burning frustrations to

not that he listens

you mostly just assault him and he takes it

JOKE HE ASSAULTS YOU RIGHT BACK

but somehow that’s therapeutic for both of you ???

smdh

i’d add heechul’s pets

BUT THAT BOY HAS A ZOO

and maybe i’m just shimkung biased lolol

ANYWAY the gist of you and his pets is that you love them and they love you

the end

bro

don’t even get me started on yesung

you know how he likes to think he’s all that

how he’s like really good at singin

wHICH HE IS UHM HAVE YOU NO EARS

but he’s like actin all airy sometimes

whICH IS Y u and eunhyuk havE A BALL MESSIN WITH HIM

EUNHYUK + U = YESUNG CANNOT LIVE

someone save Yesung from his retarded dongsaengs

lol but eunhyuk comes later

anyway, he’s airy

that side of him comes in handy 4 u

because he makes for a gr8 hypeman

letz be real

SUPER JUNIOR together is the loudest bunch of morons that will hYPE YOU DO YOUR DEATH

but you cant keep havin that when you go to award shows

YOU TRIED IT ONCE AND EVERYONE WAS LIKE AWW DATS CUTE

IT’S FKIN NOT BITSH

try havin your ears pierced with screaming every time you’re even remotely related to what the host is talking about

anyway back to yesung

he be your date to eveything

cos he ALWAYS has time to be all that

i mean you bring specific members to the specific events they fit into

u’ll understand laterz

but mostly yesung is your man for the job

cause he’s always available

you know when he’s not touring or holding concerts

whenever you need a date

he puts on all his extra accessories and offers you his arm on the red carpet

or just holds your hand cause it’s easier on his part

AND BOY HE’S ANNOYINGLY LOUD FOR YOU THE ENTIRE TIME

IT DOESN’T EVEN MATTer if it’s for some black suit event

he’s prOLLY GON BUST A MOVE and promote SJ’s black suit while he’s at it what a turd

he’s so loud in fact that you’ve reached a point past embarrassment

ur like, “Yeah, he’s my loud date. problem?”

honestly, yall have to be dumb not to see how in love you two are

there are theories on how you two ARE the one true pair

like the way yesung looks at you when you’re striking a pose

answering a question

thanking someone

receiving an award

laughing at a joke

existing in general

and you RIGHT BACK @ him

only an idiot would

but haha

nope.

just friends too

Y U ALWAYZ LYIN

ye but itz trueeeeee

no matter how fancy you get

or domestic

cos did i mention you two do the lamest things too

like there is no in between

you go buy groceries

tour Gangnam

hand in hand obviously, duh, you do it every time you’re together

as with every member of super junior but yall already knew

i think i strayed too far from my point

point is he’s there to hang out and do nothing

cos thats what both of you are good for anyway

nothing

btw he’s who you bring shopping for clothes

but only like the nice kind you feel me

you’ll get that in a little while too

but like you always go to high-end stores together

never couture tho cos why ??

and YOU GUYS DO MAKEUP TUTORIALS BECAUSE OMG HE’S SUCH A VAIN AND LIKES TO PRETEND HE CAN ACTUALLY DO MAKEUP UGH I HATE HIM

he’s the one you treat like your diary mostly

the everyday stress you have piled up he’s the one you sift through with

like you tell him all the mundane things

and he’d nod uninterested

and then you’d stop cuz you realiized he doens’t care

and then he’d get mad and be all like “Ya, why’d you stop, what happened to the leaf you kicked?”

i think imma stop here cos you get it

yall good for nothing HAHAHH

you and kangin get into the stickiest shit every time your crackheads team up

and being the loyal one you are

you always point and blame him when things hit the fan

and he’s always like “Me?”

and then points right back at you

you’re reactions to each other are fandom memes fml

and you’d think with all the treachery you pull on each other you would never be able to count on Kangin

but that is so DAMN FAR from the truth

cos this boy is insufferably thoughtful when it comes to you

his favoritism shows

like he’ll sell super junior for a 1 cent

BUT YOU ARE NOT PART OF THAT DEAL

he’s usually the one that shoos the guys off when they’ll all up on your ass

he’s also the one to kick heechul when he gets too annoying

or anyone in general

He’s usually your partner in crime when it comes to screwing up SJ’s image

and you havE THIS SIGNATURE ESCAPE ROUTINE WHEN THINGS GO SIDEWAYS

“it wasn’T ME!” you both shout, and then you jump on Kangin’s back and he runs away.

and yes there is also a compilation of you morons doing that for 15 minutes straight in multiple languages

dumb shit

he’s not as big as teasing you as Heechul

but he usually calls you ugly, that’s who you are to him

if you’re texting someone, it’s usually him

you send him ideas for a prank or sm shit

and he’s like imma do you one better

and then you just burn SM to the group bwahahaHAHAHAHAHAHHA

kidding

not kidding

you guys dont actually get to hang out often

but wHen you do there is a warning signal

and idek y yall pretend to be pranking someone else

but yall end up stabbin each other anyway

But there is also those times when you just cry

and he’s there to listen

he’s not as understanding as his hyungs, cos Leeteuk knows what to do, Heechul knows what to say, and Yesung knows how to remember the important things

but he is always there

he tells you as much as he can

and he aint dumb he can say a lot

but he’ll mostly just try to brighten up your day

by telling you a plan to attack one of the members

ANDDDDDDD

PIGGY BACK RIDES

as ive mentioned before, you jump on his back when you skedaddle out of the scene you just caused

which have caused an uproar from many

your company mostly has to fend off rumors of you and him being together the second most

youll find out who soon enough

but back to you an Kangin

he usually offers to give you a piggy back ride

even tho he doesn’t really want to

when you’re down

cos u smol child like to be carried

ew grow up sis

BTW HE WILL FITE ANYONE WHO TELLS YOU THAT

dats all i got fam

you and Shindong work the third most together outside super junior

dats obviously behind Leeteuk

and #2 who will be revealed later

and actually, you two have a very serious and business-like mindset when you’re together

which is why his skillz fly when you collab

you have youtube channel together that’s just u two posting vids you guys want to do

yall fund it urselvs and get some of ur friends to join in

WHICH FANS, ELF AND OTHERWISE LOVE

that’s why you normally go to him when you need help with work

meaning if you’re unsure if you should do a drama he’s going to lay down the points 4 u

he usually acts like your manager

and visits you the most when you’re on set

he’s who de-stresses you when you’re working

and the one who you can count on to back you up when someone at work needs to have a little piece of your mind

he’s who you call up when you want to share an idea or a vision

and is the one to more than others root for you and help you all throughout

whenever works stresses you out,

you two do something fun together

watch a film

annoy one of the other members

etc

you call him up when you have a crazy idea

you call him up when you have a song or plot in mind

you call him up when you are in need of advice

though sometimes his advice is to go to leeteuk or heechul

cos he knows he has limits

which is why you love him

because he’s real and never pretends to know more than he does

with that said though, he does know a lot

and will tell you all he knows about whatever it is you are asking about

you guys do a lot of live streams as well

sometimes its pointless

sometimes its intorspective

but most times its pointless af

and most times yesung is crying in the distant not-so-distant background

cos like i said yall hangout the most

so sometimes shindong gets into the mix

and you do the weirdest shiz in front of camera

the amount of role plays you’ve done that made viewers go ???? is uncountable smh

like like

where you’re an astronaut

and you need to tell the emperor of goryeo he’s going to be assassinated

and then yesung is the emperor’s horse

and yall die of laughter

or that time yall kissed “by accident”

and none of yall were surprised

and everyoNE WAS LIKE I KNEW IT

and you both ended up laughing

and then everyone was like? >?????

?????

idek either tbh

or that one time you were a cake

as in a chocolate cake

running away from an orge

which was yesung

and shindong was the exterminator that kept hitting him with a pillow whenever he’d talk

i cant believe

you think yesung’s had enough with you and eunhyuk

speaking of...

eunhyuk + u is quite like u + kangin

ppl pray for you to get separated

like pls

and then when you add DONGHAE

the world wants to implode and delete itself

eunhyuk is your usually your fake boyfriend

joke, he’s the fake love triangle interest

you’ll get that later

anyWAY

you say all the time every time you get the chance to that the reason why you dance half as good as you do now is because of eunhyuk

you make his ego fly through the roof

and he’s always like

dawwwww stop

no keep going

which is why if for whatever reason you need a dancer or a choreographer or anything between those lines

you call eunhyuk

or jung yunho but that’s not the point

point is the world explodes when there is a sexy suju concept

because you and eunhyuk are always paried up

the flexibility and coordination of your bodies

leaves the world thirsty

eunhyuk is pregnant because of you

Dem body rolls

Shimi-shimi

The dehydration is real

you two just do something in sync

AND THE WorLD canNOT

EVEN IF YOU DID IT BY ACCIDENT

and surprise even both of you

the world cannot

whenever you do a show together they make you do so many dances

cant blame them tho, u two be bomb

point is he’s normally your dance partner in almost everything super junior

and 73% not super junior

but beyond that he is also your bestest buddy

and since it’s a package deal, most of the time donghae is there

yall do everything from wacky antics

to window shopping

to roller coaster riding

to just lying around talking about life

actually, yall pranked the world by saying your were going out once

and thE WORLD BLEW UP

HOW FKING DARE

WE KNEW IT ASHKSDHASDHA

but then yall were like “oh we be playin yall”

EVERYONE WAS SO MAD

LIKE YALL EVEN HAD THE MEMBERS BELIEVING

DONGHAE CRIED BECAUSE HE FELT SO BETRAYED THAT HE DIDNT KNOW

HEECHUL CALLED BULL THO

BUT EVERYONE WAS HELLLLLLA MAD BOUT THIS

When you went sikE Leeteuk wasnt surprised

and everyone gave you shit for so long

Ryeowook vowed to kill both of you

kangin thought it was pretty good though

Eunhyuk and you normally go to parties together

and because you are a d U M b fking drunk

he’s always the one who cleans up after you

because you vomit

and cry

and try to kiss everyone

which is why you have safely kissed everyone in super junior when you're wasted

eunhyuk especially

there are pics to prove it

but eunhyuk doesn;t mind

he’d rather be kissed by your vomit flavored mouth than have some ho try to do something to you

he gets really unsettled when other guys come into the picture

he’ll karate chop A morOn

DARE HIM I SWEAR

ya think he be small

but he be strong

those dance moves are his weapon

KA PAW BISH

and we def cant end this without saying

he makes you hangover soup

and all that jazz

when you wanna work out or feel sick

you call eunhyuk

i mean leeteuk loves you but you cant move an inch with that boy

so its eunhyuk

unless you wanna be lazy and need a mom (so leeteuk)

honestly i cheated with that lord almighty part

ARG IM SO SORYY IDEK WHY I HAVE NOTHING TO SAY WHEN I LOVE EUNHYUK SO MUCH

ZHOUMI IS THE LOVE OF YOUR LIFE

OR AT LEAST YOU SAY EVERYTIME YOU GET WHEN YOU SEE HIM

which you wish would be a lot more than not

IF you have anything to do in China

it’s zhoumi everyday

he’s who taught you how to speak the language and the one who makes fun of you the most because of your prononciation

but you know obviously its all in good fun

you host some shows together

youve stared in a bunch of chinese mini dramas together

but most of all, you two do a bunch of variety

which people LOVE SO MUCH

liiiiiiiiiike

if you werent so busy with the rest of the world

china would love to keep you for themselves

but anyway back to zhoumi

as i said he be the love of your life

because he’s literally everything you look for in a guy

tall, handsome, smart even though he does DUMB THINGS I CANT BE--

but the only reason why you’re not dating him is

IS BECAUSE YOU ARENT

I have no explaination

you are dating though

like outwardly

it’s like an unspoken thing

where you are dating but youre not and everyone around you agrees

???

kinda

yeh

with all the chinese variety you’ve done

yall have pretty questionable photos and footage together

why is you hand in his mouth

why are you two in one pair of trousers

why are you crying over literal eggshells

why are you laughing at him dressed up in a suit

why is he making heart eyes at you when you;re wearing clown makeup

why is he making heart eyes in general

why are you making heart eyes in general

idk man

what

waht

idek

but what you do know is this

there’s this entire ten page article about how he punch some rich guy in shanghai that tried to get too close and zhoumi threw a punch

yes

out of all the boys in the band who’s said they’d punch a moron on the nose

zhoumi as actually the only one who has had the displeasure of doing just that

It was quite the talk of the town

Honestly many were scared for zhoumi

U and him counted

and the rich moron even threatened to sue

but you pointed out that there was footage in the place and that he’d lose so he should just walk away

of course he walked away

and so yeah

but obviously the sonavbish tried to get rid of any footage

And make it look like an assault

It was to be like an even bigger scandal

but you being a smart bitch that has starred in many dramas with the exact same plot already had a copy and so you won that battle

and zhoumi ‘s career was not ruined

he was even hailed a hero for all the no duh reasons

Yeah he can throw a punch

zhoumi is so soft for you though

and you for him

he’s usually the one who takes your mind off of things

but you hang out the least out of everyone due to sched differences

that doesn’t mean you dont make time for each other though

OKAY NOW FOR EVERYONE’S FAVORITE BB DONGHAE

donghae that knows all your secrets

knows all your dog stories

all your accidental injuries

all your fails

all your successes

it may take a few moments to jump start and access his mental archive

but its there

and Donghae has been your boyfriend on many many occasions

whether or not it be fake or real the world will never know

you guys are the most intimate with each other

like you guys are so casual

and comfortable

that Leeteuk tells you guys off

HeechUL GETS UNCOMFOTABLE

h e e c h u l

even suju separates you on their own will sometimes

and both of you are like

¯\_(ツ)_/¯

donghae is a certified soft boi

and his softness is amplified when you’re together

PDA is second nature to you two

many hand holds

many cuddles

many suggles

platonic?

... sure

and it doesn’t matter where you two are

public

private

interview

korea

japan

america

narnia

nothing stops you from being touchy

people ask you about it all the time

but once again

¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Anyway donghae is the go to guy for heart to heart conversations

because he has a heart of gold

the softest purest gold

and he really understands and empathizes

he cries with you over dog movies

and listens to your frustrations

and you listen to him cry

and talk about his feelings

FEELINGS

and you tie it all up by making each other smile

he actually gives really good advice

i mean they all do give good advice at a point

but donghae’s are actually quite on point

even though people think he’s slow

it’s probably because he’s once connected at the hip to you

he’s the one you talk to about boy problems and relationship problems

because he’s the only one that isn’t weirded out about the topic

i mean he’s got a soft spot of you

plus hes really caring

so he’ll listen to whatever topic you want to talk about anyway

he’s really the only who, like, pays attention to all your babbling

most of them tend to overlook that

but never donghae

he’s the guy you call in the middle of the night when you cant sleep

it’s not guaranteed he’ll pick up because i mean duh he has a life

but when he does he really listens

except for when he doesnt

cos he’s tired

and on top of being a cuddly living diary

he’s also your personal massager

like you know those knots on your shoulder

what knots on your shoulders

he massages them away because

youre his ultimate weakness

when you need him he’ll be there in a heartbeat, racing leeteuk to get to you

although he’s not as motherly as leeteuk

he’s more of a brother really

like he is motherly

he does baby you

I MEAN THEY ALL BABY YOU YOU’re THE MAKNAE DUH

but

i can

no actually

i cant explain

because i got nothing

AGAIN WHICH IS FRUSTRATING BECAUSE I LOVE DONGHAE

DHADJ:ASD

YOU AND SIWON ARE THE POWER COUPLE EVERYONE WISHES THEY COULD BE

yall do the most goals things ever

and end up posting it on insta like the aesthetic things you are

he’s the guy you call when you wanna go out and tour

and you guessed it

he’s the second person in super junior you work most with out of the group

can you imagine the power you two hold in dramas

sometimes you do cameos in his shows

sometimes its the other way around

YOU TWO ARE ACTUALLY THE ONLY ONES WITH FOOTAGE OF KISSING

honestly it was a make out but you know

donghae’s fine

Siwon and you travel a lot

in a small scale sense where you just go around on a food trip

or going on a short vacation to another country

dont tell the others tho

YOU DO CHARITIES TOGETHER

and its honestly the cutest thing ever like siwon and his charities ad;hkasd

you two have this meme where its just a compilation of you two lauging

cos yall get WEIRD when you laugh together

your laugh is weird in general

and super junior is weird in general

but you and siwon laughing is just weirder

Whenever you have to go somewhere where you think youre going to die because of the formality

you bring siwon along because he’s the most businessman looking out of everyone

plus he holds a rich man aura

because he is

haha

honestly he should just buy SM wtf

He is also the one you go to for advice

because sometimes crying with donghae isn’t really the way you want to go

he’s normally your outside opinion guy

when you normally have a course of action already in your head

but youre just not sure how to go

he gives solid points

and he’s quite firm with his answers

when you need him he doesn’t come as quick as leeteuk or donghae

but he’s the one who leaves last

because he’s just thorough like that

like if you have a mental break down

he’ll come when he can and make sure to make extra time for you

because he wants to both make it up to you and make sure you’re alright

also

i should add

that on top of being very aesthetic together with your black tie events and whatnot

yall make post memes of each other often on your own accounts SO MUCH

ELFs dig it

iconic really

ryeowook actually hates you

he hates you because you have such a beautiful voic

he hates that youre pretty

he hates that youre talented

HE HATES THE COMPETITION

but it is also what completes him

It adds to his purpose in life

To cruSh u

N remind u who is butter

yall bicker the most out of everyone

yall raise your voices at each other the most

you always attack each other

AND SOMETIMES KYUHYUN PITS YOU TWO TOGETHER AND

it’s too much to handle

but when you catch on that you’re being played

You and ryeowook teamup

AND KYUHYUN PAYS

EVERYONE THAT CROSSES YOU PAYS

BWHAHAHAHAAHHA

the sass is real when you’re together

THE AMOUNT OF SHADE you throw

makes both of your skin visibly darker to a point

he’s mostly the one to call you out when you and kangin are doing something dumb

or when you and donghae start getting cuddly

or when you just show your face to him

because yes he hates you

BUT

if he hears anyone say anything REMOTELY BAD ABOUT YOU

he wILL attacK

if he thinKS SOMEONE’s BEING TOO sarcASTIC

HE WILL CUT THEM

because only HE can be mean to you

which is why they actually think you’re dating

pipe the HECK down if you have something to say

and the feeling is mutual for you

if anyone says anything bad about ryeowook OR ANY OF YOUR BOYS

they’re dead

cold

but sometimes both of you hate super junior together

and theres a bunch of videos of you questioning why you’re both still here

when he’s not hating you though

he’s violently supporting you

VIOLENTLY

have you heard this man scream

HE SCREAMS HIGHER THAN ANY FEMALE FAN COULD

and LOUDER

if you’re doing something live

heS ONLY THERE TO SCREAM FOR YOU

then he’s out

him and yesung are on a roll when you get an award

and on your live performances

theres normally a cut scene to him in the crowd holding a big ass sign that says something mean

like I HOPE YOU TRIP in bold letters

but in fine print is continues IN SUCCESS AND GOOD HEALTH

cheeeeeeeeeezzzzyyyyyy

but that’s ryeowook for ya

Everyone's confused how you are able to be so violent and mean

But also so cheesily soft

Honestly u just weird

And so is ryeowook

when you need advice he fights you first

"How could you be so dumb to have a problem like that"

then,he'll tell you what to do

If he can, he fights your problem

and then solves it for you that way

Thats how it is, violently soft hek

So serious

ANYWAY KYUHYUN ALSO HATES YOU

DUH

but unlike ryeowook he sometimes actually make people end up wondering if youre dating

Cause ryeowook and u be mean but not so lovey dovey

But you and kyuhyun are mean and lovey dovey

he makes sure you suffer

suffer in embarrassment in live television

and will do everything in his power to get you and ryeowook to stab each other

but if you squint hard enough

he acts hella whipped for you to be pretty damn honest

anyone with a brain can put together that he’s basically like a child

a child being mean to his crush because he doesn’t know what to do

EW FEELINGS

but yall know what

even though ya both be also killing each other

THE BALLADS YOU GUYS HAVE

I cannnnOt even

is OFF THE CHARTS TEAR JERKING

any drama that has been blessed with your vocals

----i meaaaan-----

your song can save any drama

becAUSE

and yall do a lot of live performances together

uhm did I mention you’re basically part of the sub-unit KRY

actuallY JK nvm, it’s you and kyuhyun alone actually

just you and him

hitting those notes like no other

AnD theN theRE was This incident

that you had to perform in on a live awardshow

BUT you Got INTO an aCCIDENT

but like a vocal accident

as in you lost your voice

YOU KNOW WHAT HAPPENED

kyuhyun covered for you duh

because even if he wants you to suffer in public

he wants it to be by his hand

and not because you ended up getting sick suddenly

I do have to say he’s not very reliable tbh

for the sole reason he wishes to be the true maknae and to desTROY U

yes

that

and EW FEELINGs

“are you sure you hate her though” -literally everyone

“YES!” kyuhyun would answer without missing a beat

“seem like bull by ok”

THE MEMES YOU TWO HAVE AS WELL

THE MEMES

the there can only be one

i would’ve killed you if the lights were closed

excuse you, trash

i sarangHATE U Bitch

boi i cant wtf am i doin

and again

i cannot stress enough that kyuhyun wants your death by his hand

so if someone else comes for you

he’s going to attack that person more than they have you

whenever people ask him about you to, he gets all protective and scary

in summarry, he wants death but not really

yikes

heNRY IS THE WORST

he’s the only one who actually treats you like youre a child

wtf

like you two are the closest in age

the audacity

the nerve

i cant believe

he literally pulls the Oppa card

every

frikin

wHeRE

LISTEN BOI SHE BE GROWN

he literally holds your hand when you cross the street

he asks you if you’ve eaten

he coddles you, especially around others

he brings you juice on set if ever you appear on the same show

LieK

he’s so embarrassing

he be actin as if he’z ya dad

liIKEEE

get a grip

but as embarrassing as he is

he is also your best friend

and he talks fondly about you everywhere

literally never talks shit about you

unless its true tho lololo

and for real is probably literally in love with you

but is like “I’m her older brother tho so”

acts like an older brother 23/6

and the remaining time like a sweet and ExTreMely embarrassing boyfriend

will do anything for you to be honest

YOU TWO GO ABROAD TOGETHER A LOT AND ARE GOALS

if you and kyuhyun do lame things

YOU AND HENRY LIVE IT UP

yall do weird shit online too

and yall have done questionable things on variety

korean

chinese

wherever

which is why you’ve hosted a variety special before

IT WAS ICONIC

if you ever feel down

or sad

or angry

or frustrated

henry is the guy to call to be reminded of the brighter things

like THIS BOY IS ACTUAL SUNSHINE HELP

nothing is impossible or gloomy with henry

and yall thrive in all the crack-ish things you do together

yes

end

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pastelkhaleesi · 5 years

Photo

17 is finally here :)

had some shit goin ohn but like im back bitsh

#of daisies and ivy #fanfic #fanfiction #harry potter #slytherin #hufflepuff #slytherpuff #severus snape #hogwarts #oc #wattpad #snape x oc #personal posts

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scoopsohboi · 5 years

Text

im about to get into it so if you don’t want literally all my personal baggage please scroll on.

this is longer than i planned oh god im sorry.

i honestly dont know what to do anymore. all ive ever wanted was fucking peace but some people love to argue and push people and find it fun. my sister and i never got along as kids but i would try so damn hard to be on her good side because shes four years older and everyone always thinks shes funny. but shes so rude. shes loves to put people down and her favorite damn thing is being right, or at least winning.

but shes my sister, and the only one i have, and all ive ever wanted was someone i could look up to. someone i could tell everything to and someone who would be there for me when i needed someone.

she was, sometimes, but her grains of sweetness are always wiped clean with her tidal waves of negativity.

she’d tell me the things i liked were dumb and boyish, trying to make me feel bad about the fact that i wore graphic shirts and no makeup. my lack of relationships and the few i actually did have.

i used to be so extroverted and outgoing as a child. i was goofy and unapologetic and open. but she made me feel ashamed for having opinions. for having thoughts. everything i did was wrong and all i wanted was to be accepted.

so it continued.

and i would swallow everything i thought and tried to be more like her because at the end of the day it was still us in this house. and i would hate myself for some of our conversations. i would hate everything. but she would actually talk to me. and we would shop together. and when she moved out there were sleepovers and cooking and laughter. it wasn’t how id always wanted, but i finally had a relationship with her.

it was ongoing.

she got married to a man with similar ideals and though i tried to stay close to them, the things they said never changed and i couldn’t keep ignoring it. the racist and bigoted comments. the political views being shoved down my throat at every turn.

so we had a big fight. an ugly fight. id never risen my voice before that moment and i never have since. i loath yelling but god this woman pushed me farther than she ever had before. we were screaming. i pleaded for it to stop as she said i was free to leave. so i left.

ive been unable to be intimate with anyone because i cant share that part of myself with them. i cant stay in a relationship because more often than not im too in my own head, unable to make myself say the most basic opinions and thoughts because im ashamed to even exist.

i started to fall into depression in eighth grade(07). she moved out when i was a freshman(08). got married a year after i graduated(2013). i moved to la for college three years later(2016). a few months later, she asks me if im gay and i come out to her as bi. a few months later our big screaming fight.

then they try to move to georgia, shitty things happen to them, and theyre back a few months later, moving into my bedroom at my parents house. i now sleep in my dads home office. i start spending as little time at home as possible and only stop by for a weekend every month despite being only a couple hrs away by car.

ff to march of this year. i just got my bachelors degree and mainly live back home. they have a baby. they make a big deal out of how they don’t like my brother-in-law’s mom, and how his family can be psycho. my sister says at the babyshower she doesn’t want people to suddenly be nice to them because theyre having a baby. so i dont. i keep cordial and polite, but not “Friendly.”

so my nephew is born. hes perfect and beautiful and i love him so damn much. but she tells me she doesnt see it from me. that i dont care. that i dont want to be in his life. weeks pass of me crying because i cant get to know my nephew and she just gives me looks every time im in the room.

then we have a talk. an understanding it seems. and she wants me in his life. hallelujah.

but thats not the end. i dont know i ever thought it would be.

i tried to be friendly. to ask her about him every morning. to play with him. she was having me help her feed him and it was great. but then her husband cornered me. asking me one night a few months back why i “dont like to him like i used to” (waaay back in 2012). hes hurt, and i can see he doesnt get it. so i explain calmly that i dont want all the negative conversations. that i dont think like them and thats okay but i dont want their republican bs in my face. and this dude has the nerve to tell me hes open minded as shit and that i need to be more like him. that he hasnt changed and that he never forces his views on anyone.

i was truly shook.

i told him firmly that i needed space.

so its been awkward to say the least. we don’t really talk. my sister is different every day. i ways say ‘good morning’ to her, but most of the time she turns to look at me, then just looks back at her son without a word. i lock myself in my bedroom until about 9pm everyday, only coming out to use the bathroom or get food.

i feel like less than a person. i want to be able to talk to my parents but every time she hears someones voice in the house she has to run out with her baby and have it be all about her and i really dont fucking get it.

tonight she blew up on me because i was cleaning up after her cats (getting nasty vomit on my hands), and she was standing in the walkway with her son and i was having to dodge them with disgusting hands like bruh, move? and then she said i was slamming doors (hello nasty ass fucking hands??!?) and how she couldve cleaned it and how i shouldnt be mad. like....

you wouldnt have cleaned it? or you wouldve been doing it already?

and she said i wake up my nephew every day slamming doors. like girl. i stay in my damn room until yall go to sleep. i stay out of your life. i dont make much noise during the night. her son does wake up every night at 11-11:30, not my fault though. and she wakes up at like 7am and plays with him right outside my door so, bitsh, you wake me up everyday??

im just really fucking sick of this house and this family and this existence.

ive been hella depressed since february when a friend of mine got into a really bad breakup and almost died. i spiralled down trying to lift him up and now im still down in it and hes no where to be found. ive started cutting again. not often but when it gets too hard to handle.

i just wish i had people to hold me when i feel like its all too much.

i wish the people i cared about cared more about me.

#this just turned into my whole backstory #i couldnt stop once i started #i just need to get out my shit since none of my friends want to answer rn and i dont wanna do something ill regret in the morning #seriously im so sorry this is long and unnecessary #i just need to get away for a long time

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