#im still here - life is just ... busy

[ink-the-artist]

forgive me if you've been asked this before or if its annoying, but how did you learn to use colored pencils like that? your art is so special to me.

ty :) I took an art class for a few years where our teacher had us buy prismacolor pencils as one of the art supplies and had us use them kinda like paints, pressing down hard right away and blending the colors together. its not how youre supposed to use them she was just trying to teach us to use color and ig this was more to the point. I picked them up again years after i stopped going to that class just bc they were there and i wanted to play around w them a bit and ended up actually enjoying it when doing it on my own terms lol

#it was a weird class #it was just this russian lady doing private lessons in her house that my mom learned about somehow #I did NOT like those classes all we did was still life and they were hours long which is esp rough when im in high school and busy #and she wanted us to stand while working the whole time bc tradition i guess? #she did allow me to work sitting but thought i was lazy for it. idk dude i dont want to exhaust myself fast for no reason #standing is a lot more tiring than walking #i def did still benefit from those classes just from learning to accurately draw from life #did not like the teacher tho #on one hand shed paid for the art supplies for kids whos families were too poor to (and these are nice expensive supplies) #which is very nice #but on the other she was very homophobic and open about it #like when they legalized gay marriage she went on a rant about how horrible it is that they can adopt kids now #and also kind of racist #she was telling me how she got blocked from a facebook group bc she made a post asking if she could speak to a white person #and she didnt realize she was posting that publicly she thought it was a private message to the group owner #im honestly still not sure i heard/understood her correctly bc it was so bizzare and the only time i ever remember her being racist #she talked abt it like she genuienly was unaware it was racist #she described it as a misunderstanding bc she accidentally posted it publicly instead of privately #like it wouldnt have been racist to ask that at all #also one time she talked about how she saw demons in her home once #also she doesnt vaccinate her kids bc of microchips #she was like a walking russian stereotype lol #anyway heres some ink the artist lore

[sneez]

victor kain chronic pain nation rise up (credit to @transdankovsky for this idea :-D)

/ id: two digital drawings. the first image shows victor kain and daniil dankovsky sitting together; daniil is taking victor’s pulse. inside a speech bubble above victor’s head is a screenshot of a question from the duolingo russian course, in which the sentence ‘я – хороший пациент, у меня всегда всë болит’ is translated as ‘i am a good patient, i always have pain everywhere’. the second image shows daniil looking politely horrified. end id. /

#artwork #pathologic #victor kain #daniil dankovsky #this might seem a bit out of left field given that i havent talked about it at all publicly but victor having chronic pain is one of my Most #Established and Important Headcanons and i think about it all the time. i should write something about it but i have lost the ability to #write it seems :-/ but i can still create Images! so here is one :-D #there is a lot of projection involved i will confess but i also think it makes a lot of sense for his character so i am not ashamed of that #not that anyone should be ashamed of projecting i just feel embarrassed when something is Too obvious. baring my soul via the depressed dad #anyway i imagine him to have multiple chronic illnesses and health problems but primarily fibromyalgia in the pain department #but he hasnt really realised that it's abnormal so he hasnt mentioned it to anyone. until he brings it up offhandedly to daniil (as #pictured) and daniil goes through every stage of grief at the same time #hes got problems. hes gottem #as i said it was icarus who had the idea and ive been thinking about it ever since :-D ily ic #thenks duolingo russian course for my life my russian is still incredibly sparse but im tryin. im getting somewhere. very (very) slowly #i hope you are all doing well my dear friends!!! i am so sorry i have been so absent this term has been absurdly busy :-( i miss you all

[ultramarine-spirit]

New Spoon video! It's a speedpaint of Claude and Athy's standees (WMMAP x Mofun Collaboration Cafe)

#hi! life is still super busy so im still on a semi hiatus here. but i gotta post new wmmap content #even if its just a speedpaint #this dress is gorgeous... #who made me a princess #i suddenly became a princess #suddenly became a princess one day #wmmap #sbap #sbapod #athanasia #athanasia de alger obelia #athy #claude de alger obelia #claude wmmap #wmmap claude

[doobledabbadoo]

mr men art dump bc i haven’t posted anything mr men related in like. two weeks

#dooble moment #mr men #my art #mr men show #mr men little miss #the mr men show #mr bump #mr messy #mr lazy #mr scatterbrain #mr grumpy #mr tickle #mr happy #mr nervous #ngl im a little burnt out on doing mr men stuff so. some of this might be older #ill still upload when i can #its just. its hard to juggle my academic life with my job & volunteer work #ive been really busy! wish i can spend more time here #but ig thats just how life goes. bummer

[the-gayest-tree-you-ever-did-see]

finally caved and started reading all for the game. two chapters into the foxhole court and what kind of gay fucking shit is this! also did not know there were sports in here

#idk whats going on i thought it was like the raven cycle with magic and shit its called the foxhole court??? no fae???? what the fuck!!! #and i cant understand whats happening with the sports. i didnt get it. i hope i dont need to i just know kevin is top dog of the bad dogs #neil is mid mid except hes got a death wish so they want him carnally??? #ill be reading it super slowly bc im busy but i can feel it slowly turning up the heat on my brain cells as i read. they are burning. #ive got naught but ten #and neil's not neil but he is and he has a bag of secrets he's hiding in someone else's closet like okayyyy go off author fuck whats the #authors name.... nora sakavic FUCK I SHOULDVE KNOWN NEVER TO TRUST A WOMAN NAMED NORA #i dont know...i dont know.... but also the only gay neil i know is the one from dead poets society and its hard to separate the two rn #is the rest of the book going to be like this what did i get myself into. am i mentally prepared #bc i wasnt for trc and it FUCKED! ME! UP! im STILL insane #ugh. ugh. anyway. way gayer than expected. also at one point someone asks ''how safe is safe'' and MY DISAPPOINTMENT #when the answer wasnt safe as life? immeasurable. in fact i had to close the book. went to study accounting. #ACCOUNTING. HELLO?? CAN ANYONE HEAR ME IN HERE??? #the tree speaks #all for the game #aftg #what are yalls tags? #neil josten #the raven cycle #trc

[whyoneartheven]

Helllooooo everyone! i just wanted to say sorry to anyone who has tagged me in like the last 3 weeks or so; i've been busy and rather sick and never got around to answering pretty much any of you. I'm gonna start afresh, but i just wanted to say sorry, and also that i really appreciate you guys thinking of me! you are all so sweet :)

i know i really haven't been on here much at all tbh, but i'm ok! i 'm kinda just taking a bit longer of a break than i planned XD

i still wanna try to answer you guys tho; so feel free to continue tagging me if you want!

#evie rambles #i'm not quite sure who all tagged me but thanks guys! #i guess im covering a lot of things in this but basically #i love you guys and seeing you mentioned me really made me smile #but i've been busy and tired and life's just been a lot i suppose #not in a bad way tho #just a lot XD #i'll probably continue to barely be on here #but im still happy to chat #love you :) #all of you #okay just gonna drop this out of nowhere and run i guess #felt weird to make this post but oh well

[lesliemeyers]

digging through old discord convos and i just found a handful of stankyle sketches from like 2020 tht i never finished... ohh i know what my next few drawings are gonna beeee

#not today tho im busy today. but perhaps tomorrow <3 #drilling into my head that 'no i actually dont need to try to force myself to post stuff every day thats how u get burned out' vs the #'i love posting things and getting interaction teeheeeee' #ive posted so much art on here in the last few weeks bc ive simply had lots of ideas and i still have More ideas but also just. life busy #ANYWAY. all this to say. expect more art in the coming times. but also i need to pace myself #blabbermouth

[strangerhands]

mmmmm heyyy👁️. ive basically been gone from tumblr for over two days because ive been feeling like a shitty piece of shit. BUT. i finally saw dune part 2 and ohmygoddddd it was so so good. but yes. i was missing leto so bad the entire time. Father come back pls. i need you.

#it was so good tho #like so cool i was internally freaking out about how cool things looked #the fight scenes🤌 #the environments/settings🤌 #all of the fuckin machinery🤌 #the acting🤌 #the everything🤌 #yum #also i dont find austin butler attractive but funnily enough feyd was the only time ive found him hot😭 yes i have issues. but like. okayyy.. #i watched it alone and i wish doing things alone wasnt seen as such a weird or sad thing like. theres nothing wrong with it #sorta vent-> #but basically ive been feeling like an annoying piece of shit so ive been staying off of here for the most part #because ive been convincing myself no one likes me and everyone in my life would be better off without me😝😝 #just tee bee ehch #and idk i was just feeling like ass and was doing nothing and when i finally would go to use tumblr i was already too tired to do shit #so i just went to sleep #and i was busy today #yesterday* #and ill probably be a bit busy today too but idk maybe hopefully ill catch up a bit #idk ya boys just been hating himself like usual but not as usual bc it was worse but it is what it is #i felt a bit better yesterday though #and also my new antidepressants ive been on havent been doing shit for me so im going back to a previous one i used to be on so yea #hopefully that helps soonish idk #i never vent on here so i feel kinda bad for doing so but i just wanted to puke my thoughts here #also since im already here complaining ive just like. not written at allllllll basically like i got into my head and made myself discouraged #so. that sucks. but also nothing out of the ordinary there #why does Everything i say sound so embarrassingly depressing and pathetic hhhhhhhgggggggggggggghhhghghg #anyways yea i was doing bad im still not doing good but hopefully will be a bit better so ill be back and caught up later today or tomorrow #idk if anyone gave a fuck or noticed but i just like complaining into the void so yea #talkin shit

[good-beanswrites]

i’m not sure if you’re still accepting reqs, but if you are, could i get shidou with the prompts memory or dance? thank you!

Ahh thank you! Those are such cool prompts for him omg, these were really interesting to write 👀 I went a more dramatic route for Memory here, and just posted a sillier one for Dance

Shidou had never wanted to ruin someone else’s birthday present before. Of course, in reality, he wouldn’t dream of doing anything rude, but he couldn’t stop the guilty desire to snatch the bouquet of flowers away from Muu and throw them onto the ground. 

He knew the olfactory nerve could trigger memory recall better than any of the other senses. It was still strange experiencing it firsthand. 

Shidou assumed he would have completely exhausted his memories of his family by now. After all, he thought of them nearly every moment since arriving in Milgram. He’d played through every birthday, every milestone, every smile in his mind as he went about his day. He lay awake into the late hours remembering the fights, the tears. He was ripped from sleep reliving those final moments with them. 

He thought keeping them close would ease his mind in his short time left. Since the guard had forgiven him, he felt the time stretch far out across his life. Memories that used to bring him comfort now brought with them a sting of pain.

So when Haruka presented Muu with the bunch of mismatched flowers he’d requested, Shidou’s placid smile nearly broke in surprise. He knew the present moment should have been his top priority. He should have been attentive to the fact that Haruka had finally left his cell after days of avoiding meals. The comments about Fuuta’s strange words following his head injury should have been more concerning. There were a dozen things he should have noticed then, but he was too busy noticing things long passed. It took only a breath of the fragrance to send him tumbling into memories he hadn’t thought of in years.

The flowers smelled of early days at the hospital, when he still turned to examine the get-well-soon gifts in the patient rooms and smiled at the thoughtfulness. It was from a time he made an effort to memorize faces and names, from when he’d return home satisfied with a job well done. 

They smelled of the first blooms to appear in the Kirisaki household. It was a victorious scent, after so much meticulous pruning and care. He was always very particular about how everything was done, and it finally paid off.

They smelled of neighborhood walks as two tiny hands clung to him while crossing the street. Like their father they were very well-behaved. They never ran off too far without him.

They smelled of apology vases, placed quietly on the kitchen table following late stays or back-to-back shifts that kept him away longer than promised.

They smelled of his childhood home, running barefoot through gardens with the girl who would someday be his wife. 

They smelled of nervous first dates, and of comfortable hundredth dates. 

They smelled of wedding arrangements.

They smelled of funeral arrangements.

Shidou wished Muu a happy birthday before excusing himself from the room. He made his way back to his cell. There, he tried to recall one last thing, from those seemingly endless nights studying for examinations. He laid back on his bedding, closing his eyes. 

He ran through the list of everything that could make the human brain forget.

#milgram #shidou kirisaki #it ended up with more prose/summary than my usual style but im actually really happy with it #it was cool to peek back into his life given what few details we know #i know the flower thing is obvious for him but i still never realized just how often hed actually be around them in his day to day life #i couldnt expand on it here without getting off topic but im really loving the disillusioned doctor vibe for him -- its so interesting sinc #literally everything about him and his crime show he takes a lot of pride in his profession #the fact that hes shown to lose hope/see things in a much harsher reality at the same time... #woo thank you for the request :D #work got wicked busy so it was nice to stew in some shidou thoughts throughout the day #drabbles

[odetolovers]

hello 💃

#hi hi i am never on here anymore tumblr my tumblr i miss you #tbf it’s because my life has been so crazy busy #i am no longer unemployed and am in fact in the career i wanted. YAY! #also i love my girlfriend and my cats and my life and healing and growth #and also…self worth question mark #something i have historically struggled with but am now getting less mentally ill about #HALLELUJAH! #i can never quite wrap my head around how lucky i am #and how fulfilled i am #this much happiness feels like it shouldnt be real but. i am actually deeply known and loved through my worst moments and my best and it’s #the most healing thing i’ve ever experienced #shoutout to my girlfriend (sooner rather than later wife) for being just. the most perfect person for me and the best person ive ever met #she’s my best friend fr #eek. life is good and love is good and we both have colds that are going to last through christmas but i know it will still be the best #christmas of my life because it’s with them #life is looking up :) #craziest concept to a very traumatised girlie is that life can actually be good and happy but im slowly learning to trust it #<3 #valentina talks

[h-doodles]

boy the sudden outpour of angst ideas for larissa weems x reader in my brain got me weeping so bad i feel a fever coming on

#ALL YALL POSTING ABT FALLING OUT OF LOVE BUT MY BRAIN GOING 700 MILES FASTER AND 3000 YEARS FURTHER WITH A #the love was still there. it didnt change anything. #ABT READER LEARNING SHE'S DYIG SOON. BUT KNOWS LARISSA IS SWAMPED WITH NEVERMORE & DEALING WITH THE KIDS. AND SHE ALSO LOVES #HER NEVERMORE FAMILY SO MUCH. SHE CANNOT BEAR TO MAKE THEM SAD #AND BC LARISSA IS SO BUSY. SHE HASNT REALLY LOOKED @ HER WIFE. AND TO READER ITS JUST OKAY. AND CREATES A MINI VIDEO JOURNEY #AND LIKE. ITS JUST ALL THE LITTLE THINGS SHE LOVED TO DO WITH LARISSA. AND THE KIDS. AND OF LIFE U KNOW. #and its wonderful and sad and beautiful #but she's dying and she doesn't want anyone else to know; her family had gone the same way too and thats how she wants it to end #and its just. augh. not my brain adding more angst rn #where her one & only friend notices #and is the one bringing her to all her doctor's appointments (outside jericho ofc. she knows her wife would know the instant had she been #diagnosed there) and like. Larissa getting more and more suspicious of their outings and accuses r of infidelity #.......and at this point r is just. done. and lies. #and gets out of Larissa's life. and everyone's just. shocked & devastated #R leaves but also begs her friend to go away. because she's just counting her days at this point. and you know what #the kicker here is that they agree knowing this was the last act of kindness they could give her. #AND LARISSA STILL DOESNT KNOW. #and wouldnt have known until Wednesday had a vision of a phonecall that'll shatter her #........shit. im crying again haha #anyways i love cinematic orchestra's i built a home <3 it really gives me such the best angst storylines #personal.txt #clown.txt #mod lee speaks stuff #idea.txt #larissa weems #larissa x reader #larissa weems x reader #lee writes #lee writes stuff #my fic

[yuukimiyas]

hello hello sweet friends in my phone!! ໒꒰ྀིㅅ´ ˘ ` ꒱ྀིა & a v happy weds to you!! <33 i hope may has been showing you sm love so far & that the magic continues throughout the month!! ໒꒰ྀི∩˃ ᵕ ˂∩꒱ྀི১ have the best day EVER!!

#ᕱ⑅ᕱ.* journals! #goooood mornie sweets!!! ٩(ˊᗜˋ*)و✧*｡ how are we doin?? #im still dealin w some health stuff which sucks :((( i just want it to be sorted out already!!! hopefully by next thurs it will be ᐡ• ·̫ •̥ᐡ #keepin my lil paws crossed!!! i have some other exciting/stressful news!! im lookin for a new place!! ⸜(*´ᗜ`*)⸝ #bc if i resign my lease here for another 2 yrs they raise my rent like $600 ໒꒰ྀི𖦹﹏𖦹꒱ྀི১ & that is TOO MUCH!!! #i love my apt sm so i’m a lil sad i gotta leave in sept :’< but im sure i’ll find a super great place!!! #sigh i wish my life was boring again so i could be on here every moment 𐔌՞⸝⸝ʚ̴̶̷̷ · ʚ̴̶̷̷⸝⸝ ՞𐦯 i’ve been so busy/overwhelmed lately !!! i HA #but im going to take today one step at a time & make a lil budget!! :3 wahoo!! i’ll try & see you guys later!! MWAH MWAH!!!

[bishonenspit]

every time people fundamentally misunderstand the patalliro characters i lose years off my life

#bii talk tag #this isn't about anything specific dw im just thinking in general #the amount of bad takes ive seen in my time here.... augh #mostly abt The Mawaich obviously ppl just don't GET HIM... like obviously i consider myself the CEO of him but actually #the one thing ppl get wrong imo is that he was softened and lost his bad assery later in the manga which i DISAGREE WITH #at no point in maraich's life did he CHOOSE to be trained as an assassin and do what he does that's like key lore #he was raised by larken and trained as an assassin since he was a child he didn't really WANT to do any of that business #and even post figaro he still shows up and participates in major plots more than ban does!!! tbh!!! #just bc he had a kid and started doing housework doesn't mean he became useless that's literally the opposite #and even before having figaro ppl say he got softened GOD FORBID!!! like u know!!! and he's STILL doin shit!! whatever man #i hate it fr he's not a weak character for living comfortably he's still capable you guys are just haters 🫵‼️ #also any time ppl call patalliro annoying i get annoyed bitch it's his show don't watch it if you're not here for him #also ppl give ban way too much credit he is Stupid #anyways im just Thinking

[de2thletter]

even though i’m likely about to fall off the face of the earth tumblr wise, i would like to say that i do often think about the stories and dynamics we create as writing partners. especially those few that knew me from before my last tumblr hiatus that i reconnected with, i never forgot our dynamics and how much fun it had been to create stories. anyways, just feeling extra appreciative of the time i had / have creating !!

#just an extra special shoutout to makenzi bc #i was so happy to see that she was still activr #and wasnt sure if she’d still wanna write together but 😭😭 #anywaysssss #i’ll still be on discord and imma keep these 3 specific #blogs up and running for when i do have time #but w how busy life is goinf #im not gonna force myself to be here #and stress myself out over it lmao #sorry for all the ooc posts the past few days #tbd

[themyscirah]

Get out of my life, Hal Jordan, while I'm still sorry I killed you!!!!!

#THIS LINE GOES INSANEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE #absolutely LOSING IT AYDUANDJAHDHASUQGSHWGDG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! #bro. bro. brooooooo #also the connor bastard joke right before that lmao #but BROOOOOOOOOOOOO #sorry i just- error 404 swishy.exe is not responding #bro. bro. bro. #i just- ehriahsqjsuegshsj #the keysmashes there are like crunching noises to me actually. im literally just as fjahdaidhashshdh like a dog w a bone #BROOOOOOOOOOOOOOO #also we are 100% going to pretend im here for hal and that i didn't somehow get distracted again and am now reading the connor origin arc <3 #BROOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO #also i have read a lot of comics today so yay. i have done absolutely 0 homework though which is a little 😅 butttt #its friday though. yeah im gonna be busy all day tmrw but who cares. we're reading green arrow comics #ANYWAYS I JUST- GET OUT OF MY LIFE WHILE IM STILL SORRY I KILLED YOU GOES INSANE #never going to emotionally recover from this. .........anyways #hal jordan #oliver queen #dc comics #swishy liveblogs #anyways something something if anyone cares ill post some of the panels i saved from this issue but im nuetral on the idea so only if #someone wants me to #WHILE IM STILL SORRY I KILLED YOU!!!!!!!!!! BROOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!! #sorry sorry okay i think i have it out of my system now #<<<<liar #blah

[executivenerd]

Curtis Harding's On and On was in my top 100 for 2022 (because it's a great song by a great artist) and I am struck again by the fact that if any other show about 2 people ended with a cookout with one of their families and walking off into the sunset to that song nobody would question that it was romantic.

#sambucky #sorry for the rambling but hearing that song again brought back the feels #also im still here lifes just been hectic/busy/a lot lately but i still love yall