#im upset and having a bad time | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

theclowncowboy · 8 months

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guy who relives the past every night thinking about everything he couldve done different. but now its been 4 years and he cant find her anymore and no matter how many internet rabbit holes and old conversations he searches he cant find his old friend and he feels like a little kid again left alone on the playground crying under the slide at lunch time. or something

#im upset and having a bad time #if i could throat punch 16 yr old me i fucking would oh my god #why did i block her on everything and now its like is she even. stil alive. lmao. i dont know!!!! i dont fucking mknow and its been eating #at me for 4 years #tw vent #del later #im soooooooo fucking god god god god god the only person who i feel knew me to my core and back and still didnt want me. but we .#dont have time to unpack that all . just wish i could find an old friend and reconnect. sad

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b4kuch1n · 8 months

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siren

#bakuspecial #cw: nudity #cw: body horror #monster #siren! I think. they're bird to me #I think this has been brewing since that stream mim did of drawing dnd monsters only from official text description #and when the official art for the sirens were shown I was like. oh thats just a woman with wings #lmao like. granted. its an official dnd book available for all audience. you cant make it too Bad To Look At #(I do not agree with this but it wasnt about me. if its about me its gonna be about very few people lmao)#but yeah. after that I got slightly too into the idea of putting more bird into birdwoman #but I also do genuinely love monsters that are Rearranged Human Parts so. I couldnt commit too much to the bird scales Im so sorry #I wanted the fleshiness. the feel. textural experience of holding her hands and being like oh that's a human #even when ur eyes tell u otherwise. mmm #...I looked to my right as I was typing these tags and saw. the fucked up pikmin I tried to sculpt the other day along with the pin #and got startled #its so. its so fucked up. gods. dusty white naked grainy parsnip #I used to have that one doll I butchered wanting to customize in a box next to me and thats way less upsetting than this. man #its perfect actually I will never throw this thing away. anyways #now. now I go to bed. its sleep time for the baku #have a good night lads! you CAN have it both way easily you just need a big bat

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unluckyprime · 1 year

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nicks like . fine. he’s fucking it up in hell as a torso rn <3

#hermie watching ted lasso is something that can be so personal #VERY upset he’s been forgotten so much that he’s angry about it in character #it’s worrying but like I’m excited for hermie angry arc #also genuinely I think nick is fine #lincoln killed this episode I LOVE this pissboy #also normal having c grades but also still catching up on homework . I love him #aND IM WORRIED ABT HIM GOD #digital art #dndads #dungeons and daddies #normal oak #hermie the unworthy #lincoln li wilson #scary marlowe #taylor swift dndads #Nicholas foster #sorry this is late :((((( I was having a bad time and also midterms

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spaciebabie · 1 month

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shoutout 2 this person in my class who i can tell wants 2 talk 2 me really bad but instead of doing that whenever she has the chance she'll talk 2 whoever else is around and ignore me entirely unless im mentioned by name

#bruh lmao #so awkward. say something you dingus lol #ik you wanna talk 2 me so bite the bullet already #gyatt #spacie spoinks #literally. she was having a conversation with my partner for the project im doing. and like #heres the thing #if im not invited into conversation i usually dont participate #im like a vampire like that #and so like. after they're done conversating she'll just kind of. stand there. this has happened twice now #like dude sdkfjshlkdfj #im not upset by this behavior i have very awful social patterns as well and have been thru this (i am autistic)#am i gonna hafta say something. lol #probably #''hey bro whats up with you. i dont mean like how are you doing. i mean like. whats wrong with you.''#cant say that its not funny when you say it irl only when the ppl you're talking with know you're not being mean 😭#also like. this person has been staring at me lol #which like. makes me flustered so whenever she's around i panic and my face fucking turns red its god awful #for awhile it made uhh. my paranoia get really bad im ngl!!#its already bad when it comes 2 being around strangers but this like made it REALLY bad for a few weeks #im more calm now tho. rational brain won over and im chillin #i gotta work up the courage 2 say something b4 the semester is over or this is gonna bother me for the rest of my life sfkjsdhflkjs #i dont wanna put her on the spot #the only time i see her is when im in class #and . doing that interaction in front of ppl. i dont wanna embarrass her ksjfskjd

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llitchilitchi · 26 days

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I get hating certain political systems and trying to abolish totalitarian regimes but at the same time many of them are so interwoven with our history and society they have become tropes and when I consume media with a setting where the monarchy is absolute and revered then I am playing my part and sucking that princeling off

#litchi.txt #there are games that address this kinda stuff! and thats good! its good that there are games talking about how this is bad!#but at the same time when I go into a game knowing I will be the prince's sword and shield I dont expect the game to be anti-monarchy #despite having pretty strong opinions on many a thing I tend to put most of them away the moment I engage with media #imperialism bad. monarchy bad. doesnt mean I cant enjoy roleplaying in a game where I help these systems #because guess what its fictional and not everything needs to be a strong statement about politics #sometimes we just... wanna vibe with a setting #I am so very thoroughly exhausted from the politics in this country and where things are going I just kinda need that no brainer gameplay #even if it means working as the secret police for an emperor #even if it means replacing one dictator with another #because its still a game #a lot of people talk about imperialism-monarchy-colonialism with these things because they are a big issue even today #and they are important to talk about!! in real world!!#but I rarely see people be this upset about like religion etc which like. thats also a massive problem.#idk Im just tired of trying to look at fanart of all my fantasy medieval games and people being upset that the games #are not super anti-monarchy despite the marketing being literally 'you are the emperor's bestie. you help him out and go on a quest.'#'your quest is to manipulate local government to support the emperor and do his bidding'#like idk how That is supposed to be a game that addresses it properly #and maybe it does but ig since the MC doesnt look at the player and go REMEMBER KIDS! THIS IS EVIL AND BAD AND WHY MONARCHY SUCKS #it doesnt count??? I guess???

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qiekzart · 6 months

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drew that one guy from yugioh

[plz reblog]

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marathedemonoverlord · 9 months

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So I think I'm over my Obey Me Phase or like at least over Nightbringer because it's Season was shit but just you know food for thought...

Aint it funny how MC is now completely isolated from other humans/their friends/family/pets?

Like my friend and I were talking about it and like imagine MC has HUMAN/MORTAL family and friends that they talk to every time they were separated from the brothers. Like whenever the Immortals really tries them or pushes them they can go to their human friends for like a palate cleanser and a clear head/remind themselves and ground them to the reality of their situation/support from NOT blind lemmings. Like sort of remind them that they're still human and not on the same playing field as immortal Demons/Angels/Sorcerers

But now in Nightbringer that's literally stripped from them; MC has NO ONE outside of the Brothers/Immortals they're literally FORCED to bond with their circle of dysfunctionals and its like now you are stuck in that toxic friend circle because literally your circle of support hasn't been born/exist yet. That's fucking horrific.

No wonder MC is far more clingy and annoying in Nightbringer than they are in OG; Every lesson is a chip away at their original personality and sanity to replace it to the codependent creep MC is now lol.

#obey me nightbringer #obey me #obey me MC #obey me nightbringer MC #MC is so fucking annoying this is the only headcanon i can work with #No but like its so creepy because i always imagined MC balanced their human life and their Devildom life to stay rational but now #Well now with no circle of human/mortal supporters like their friends and family theyre literally forced to cling to the brothers #Its so terrifying about Nightbringer thats why Im still so upset we're stuck in the Past #Its shit like this that makes me unable to enjoy Time Travel Shit like I want to go for Boba with my friends but I cant do that #No i cant do that because I got a toxic friend group to babysit #No but like MC seems more stupid and clingy so my guess is theyre mentally unraveling to the point they just dont want to be alone #Like begging for validation and attention from anyone especially the immortals #Pray for MC theyre going into their codependent phase now #Don't worry; just like with real friends theyre not gonna break out of this for years until they get the courage #Which we all know MC doesnt have the balls to drop the brothers/Immortals like bad habits lol #Ima play with this headcanon until MC stops sucking or we go back to the future.#I miss MC's family and friends who have to live with the fact the immortals took them from them again

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callingauguste · 1 month

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Me and Ao3 when it comes back on.

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tianshiisdead · 2 months

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im happy my post is garnering discussion but honestly i wasnt around for 2018-2021 fandom on tumblr and i was mainly talking about how its kind of silly to get mad at people for portraying colonizer countries as mean, or calling it demonization and stuff. like its okay not to like personally portraying ur fav characters as mean or part of the state, but getting irritated at the fact that it exists or is popular imo kind of misses the fact that this… is the state and nation personification fandom. and its hard to say its not canon when canon did once portray the characters in uniform and at times involved in their state activities… like the early strips discussing western imperialism in china is literally ‘china being bullied by the allies’ ‘france wanting to grope china’ ‘china being treated like a maid’ etc etc like they were very much. the state LOL also china and japan’s canon relationship, as much as I have my issues with it, has an entire thing about china being stabbed by japan… i do feel like hetalia started out as a history nerd’s history exploration that blended humour with ‘what i find cute’ with satire etc etc, which inevitably involves illustrating the personifications as vessels of state and culture, and although the modern strips have deviated quite a bit… well, different people will approach this series for different reasons, right? Whether its serious or comedic content showing the characters as mean or imperialist or unpleasant, it’s not something that deviates too far from canon (if we take all canon eras into consideration) nor is it surprising given how history laden the topic is.

#diary #hetalia #hater tag #also have some issues with some things being called drama…#like i know some of u think of me and some others as drama stirring little devils #honestly i dont enjoy drama that much but ill become upset when i see things that i see as racist or insensitive…#because im of the opinion that this fandom requires extra sensitivity given the subject matter.#let people have fun #but #also be careful yk? i guess for me personally im always trying to be careful #when im out of my depth i try to talk to ppl with better understanding while doing my own research #and if ive written or expressed antyhing bad (which i certainly have even on this blog many times before)#i try to change my stances with new info… and like #this is important to me and its important for me to read ppls thoughts bc.#i know what its like to be treated racistly and dismissed. or to have things and history precious to me twisted #but anyways rambling aside… i guess what i want to say is i understand it seems annoying but #if you post something insensitive… and someone gets upset… then thats just how it is. hetalia is sensitive #again ive definitely posted bad insensitive things. ive been told im acting out of line.#and it sucks. but… sometimes you have to understand ur own irritation doesnt outweigh the hurt #and listen a little #sometimes i like things that i then find are insensitive or cruel. and id rather not engage with it than dismiss peoples hurt… or something #honestly i keep most of my whining private i promise JLKFHDJGLKFH BC FOR THE MOST PART I THINK I CAN TELL THE DIFF BETWEEN #when i have a real issue and when im just nitpicking #so i keep my more petty whining or basic stuff private #but if i see something egregious then i dont want to be quiet #and if a friend of mine (esp if theyre a kid) is upset or hurt by racism I dont want to be quiet

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reel-fear · 1 month

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MIKE BLOCKED ME ON TWITTER FOR ROASTING HIS DUMBASS RESPONSE TO THE GRAPHIC NOVEL STUFF!!

grown ass man scared of the 19-year-old queer being mean to him over his public meltdown more at 8.

#ramblez #little white boy sad? U sad bc nobody likes you? Bc u constantly make a fool of urself and show off ur distaste for ur fans? lmao #this is one of the greatest things to ever happen to me imagine how mad he'll be when he finds out the fangame Im making has queers in it #hes gonna have a whole other white boy meltdown on main KJSNFDGKJHFGKJHGKJHSDFGSD #hes so fucking sensitive maybe just get off of social media Mike this never ends well for you #batim #batdr #bendy and the ink machine #bendy and the dark revival #and look Im joking around about this but it really is sad that the bendy devs cant handle this kind of critique towards their decisions #it seems despite the backlash once again they are choosing to ignore their fans which is yknow upsetting #But hey ig if the devs being awful was a dealbreaker for this fandom I wouldve left a long time ago and I havent #dw Im not going anywhere <3 #also if anyone else here was also criticizing Mike maybe check his acct to make sure ur not blocked now since apparently #old habits die hard and this is certainly a pattern with him KJHDSFKGJHSDKFGJHDFGSD #also look before anyone asks yes I was kinda mean to him over this but to put bluntly if hes gonna be this dismissive to his fans concerns #he deserves it. Theres this persistent attitude esp in bendy fanspaces of being defensive of the devs #and I dont know why they have been extremely horrible people every single chance they get #and its very hurtful to see how many people would rather tell me to be kinder to the people who broke the heart of a child me when they #dismissed any ideas of putting queers like me in their stories than to realize Mike n Meatly bring this bad attention to themselves #to put bluntly I dont owe them kindness not until they at least apologize for the shit they did which they still havent #mike hasnt even addressed his vent poem in the code of BATDR let alone the other shit he said n did #so no I will not be kind to him ever hope this helps!

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gorillawithautism · 3 months

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i share my thoughts expecting to engage in genuine discussion. instead i get people misinterpreting my words, dismissing my feelings, and generally being dickish about it. thanks. very helpful.

#swingset #'yall i think it's okay to just take the win' i never said that wasn't allowed. i said i (me) (one person) (not talking about anyone else)#(literally just me) am having a hard time being optimistic. not that it's a fucking crime to be optimistic about it #just that i PERSONALLY am having difficulty being anything but cynical #and i straight up acknowledged that i was already in a bad mood which was affecting my perception #'im sorry but' <- top ten ways people start sentences when they actually think you're the fucking problem #i just wanted to share my thoughts why is that suddenly bad #why is it bad for me to have an emotional response #go fuck yourself #'i think there's better ways to focus our energy than being upset' DOES THAT FUCKING MEAN IM NOT ALLOWED TO BE UPSET ANSWER QUICKLY #i hate you

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softavasilva · 1 year

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"keep defending alba as she deserves the world" is gonna get tattooed onto my forehead btw

#warrior nun cast #kristina tonteri young #alba baptisa #warrior nun #wn cast #the way kristina clutches her heart as she talks about her #im gonna fucking throw up #not to be dramatic but i cried the first time i saw the video and then i sobbed the more i replayed it #theyre friendship means thr world to me #and im so fucking upset about all the missed interactions we could have gotten bc of what assholes have been saying about alba #im ginna defend her with my entire being actually #say one bad thing about either of them i'll actually commit murder #txt*

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pansyfemme · 2 months

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i think this time of year is cursed

#last year i got horribly sick and depressed #this year i had to flee my dorm and miss classes to keep myself safe from harassment until i could work out moving times #im so fucking angry i am fuming i am furious i want to scream #i did absolutly nothing to deserve this. this wasnt a mutual argument this wasn’t a bad roomate thing this was a person using the fact that #i am a traumatized trans person to intimidate and harass me and make me feel unwelcome in my housing #i feel sick with rage.#im well liked on campus im doing fantastic in all my classes i am doing everything i can #and one person decided he hated me and fucked up my entire semester #the good thing is i am never sleeping there again. i am not returning to that dorm until i am there to move out and i am greatful #but im just so upset about the whole thing.#everyone on campus agrees i did nothing. that i didnt cause this. but i still have to carry the burden of moving #he will be talked to and i dont think he will ever feel welcome on campus after this but i am so angry he thinks so little of me he thought #he could make my life hell and face no punishment for it.

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thats-a-lot-of-cortisol · 3 months

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Maybe a doodle of Alfira from bg3? I just think she's neat and I've hardly seen any art of her

You're so right?? I didn't realize it until you said it but yeah. For such a well-loved NPC art about her doesn't float around all that often

I wanted to draw her singing but I can't stop thinking about how intensely upbeat she has to stay for the kids. The poor woman has to be at her breaking point

#i also got an idea for a full alfira drawing (also sad though)#so thank you for that! /gen #i started thinking about her while I was drawing and now i have Feelings about her #we almost always see her (at least trying to be) upbeat #the only times i remember seeing her upset are 1) when you meet her at the grove and 2) when you talk to her about the hostage tieflings #she needs a hug & a hot drink & a good cry & space to just. not have to put on a brave face #and she's so YOUNG too?!?#like. there's no way she's past 30 right? a good chunk of the tiefling adults are pretty young tbh #unless im just really bad at figuring out ages #alfira bg3 #bg3 #bg3 fanart #baldurs gate 3 #my art #art request #sketch

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hotwheelschili · 5 months

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leave him alone he’s just a big eyed babygirl trying her best but not succeeding

#yes this is about #carlos sainz #im upset everybody is pounding on him in the bad way #he’s already having a bad time maybe if you don’t like him don’t talk about him?

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opens-up-4-nobody · 29 days

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...

#sorry im thinking abt death again #because it's weird to think that ive been in the room. maybe a meter away from someone as they died #that someone being my mom. its just weird. the time in the hospital feels like it happened in some dark little pocket universe detached from #time. a calm room and then the soft blips of a monitor then the nurse rushing in to say she'd passed #i dont kno y ppl use that phrase: passed on. i mean i do. it softens the topic. makes it sound peaceful. ive yet to use it. i just say she #died bc thats what happened. is that insensitive? i dunno. when i was home i realized that i come off as much stranger than i think. the way #my family see me doesnt fit how i see myself. i dont kno what to do with that. i dunno. theyre all together today #for an early easter. and im halfway across the country again. nose so stuffy ive had to mouth breathe for the last 3 days #and again. everything feels the same as it did before but also profoundly different. sometimes i cry in the mornings. or when i think abt #future vacations she wont be there for. bc in the end she quickly slipped away in a way that couldn't be described as peaceful until her #last half a day. and all i can think about in that tiny room is how scary it would be to lose control like that #and how its not fair and she didnt deserve to die only halfway through a lifetime. but its not about fair and its not about deserving.#sometimes bad things just happen. that's life. and now i own a book called motherless daughters. and now im standing with the countless #others who've lost their moms too early. ive already become aware of 3 ppl in my daily life who are in the same club #i keep thinking about this moment that happened between my parents at the hospital. apparently my dad was helping her get cleaned up and her #stomach was so bloated she looked like she had a bby in there. which my dad said. and my mom apparently said: but it's a baby no one want. i #dont kno y that upsets me so much. all the things i heard abt her being in the hospital before i got there upset me. and the rest of my #family was there to see it. so i have the least traumatic version of the story. and i got almost 27 years with her. except my sisters #probably got more time with her bc i spent so much time away. or maybe not. i dunno.#i dunno. im just sad that shes gone and sad that it was drawn out even a little bit. 6 days isnt long but im sure it felt like an eternity.#again not fair. nothings fair. 53 years of unfairness culminating in a tragedy. she would hate me characterizing it like that. she lived a #full life as they say. full with an asterisk on account of length #unrelated

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