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pequestrian · 1 year

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Story below cut. TW: domestic abuse

<<; Previously

After unpacking his truck alone, Jake waited patiently for Aleisha to exit her room. It wasn’t his place to ridicule her for sleeping in or grieving on her own, especially since there weren’t any chores to do around the house. At least, no chores that he knew of.

While he waited, Jake made himself at home in the living room. The couch was faded and worn, but not tattered and broken. He found the remote on a side table next to the lone rocking chair and acquainted himself with the small selection of cable channels. He wasn’t one for watching television, but he had a microscopic list of things to do with his free time as he waited for Aleisha.

The first time he needed to eat, he pillaged the kitchen in search of something edible. He found a few cans and boxes of things with expiration dates that suggested its lack of popularity within the household. The excessive health benefits the food promised to provide screamed that they were in an old person’s house, even if it did suddenly belong to Aleisha.

In need of some sustenance from this century, he left to explore the nearest town he could find for food. Frontier turned out to be a very, very tiny town, especially compared to East Lansing up by State. Many of the buildings, even on the main street, which Aleisha happened to share with the town, were decaying and falling apart. Where windows weren’t boarded up, junk spilled out of buildings like innards from a corpse. Based on the outlook of the town, Jake was ready to pull out a map and hike his way northward to Hillsdale. He knew Hillsdale would have choice places to shop. You couldn’t have a college town without shopping, after all.

One building promised to have something inside. Jake pulled up and made sure to lock both his doors twice, just in case. He couldn’t take too many chances, discomforted by the ramshackle buildings around him, falling apart at the seams. When Jake crossed the dusty dirt patch, despite the snow and ice, which passed for a parking lot and entered the convenience store, his opinion of the place didn’t get any better. The door handle felt greasy, and even the chime of the bell to announce his entry had a dismal tune. Jake could have been imagining things, but his skin felt like it was crawling along the back of his neck and down his spine.

The man at the counter didn’t look up at Jake’s entry. He appeared to be reading from a book. He was far from clean shaven, sporting a beard that was twice the length of Jake’s hair. It twisted on itself, obvious teased by his fingers as the words from the book tickled his brain. Jake left the man a wide berth as he explored the layout of the shop.

The old, grimy wooden floor creaked under Jake’s feet as he moved on. At some places, Jake could swear that it bowed underneath his weight. His horse was stronger than this building, and that was saying something. From then on, Jake tread with caution, avoiding the apparent dips in the floor, and stepping on what he hoped were strong cross beams underneath.

The quality of the food within the store seemed to match the theme of the town as well. Jake picked a package of Oreos off of the dusty bottom shelf and saw the expiration date was nearer his birthday than the current date. He hastily replaced the package, dusting his fingers off on his pants. While his jeans were far from clean, they felt much better to Jake than the entire atmosphere.

When Jake approached the coolers, he noticed that it looked a lot cleaner inside, and the beer much fresher. He snorted softly to himself. With the state the town was in, what else did the occupants have to do?

Eventually, Jake made his way to the very small selection of food that wouldn’t cause diabetes in a day. He found some bread, lunch meat, cheeses, and not a whole lot else. The shop had some beef jerky, but even that didn’t look right to Jake. It looked like it had been packed in someone’s garage.

Jake approached the counter, and the attendant put his book down in such an irritated manner that Jake figured he didn’t even want his business. Chewing on what Jake hoped was his tongue, he rung Jake up with slow, careful movements. He didn’t appear to be able to move his fingers well. Totaling everything up, he drolled out Jake’s balance.

Jake carefully handed over a couple bills, avoiding touching the teller. He looked greasy enough to pass for a garage mechanic, piecing together old car parts to make the ultimate hick mode of transportation. With slow, less than deliberate movements, the man stuffed the bills into the register, glanced up at the return total, and fished it clumsily out of the drawer. He had to recount the change in his hand, even though he only had three coins to return. Jake cringed when he swung his hand over and dropped the one bill and change into his hand, and he packed up his purchase before the man had a chance to ask if he’d like a bag.

Fumbling with his keys in his hand, balancing his meager findings for food, Jake hurriedly unlocked the driver side door to his truck and let himself in. Already, within the safety of his vehicle, he could breathe freely. The town gave him the heebie jeebies. No matter how long he stayed with Aleisha, he would never revisit Frontier.

As days passed, Jake’s requirement to stay busy overrode his patience. It wasn’t that he was used to getting things his way, he just didn’t like sitting idle when there were things to do. Deciding that Aleisha needed some time for herself, he set himself to worrying about the state of her property.

Jake began by searching the grounds for her grandfather’s tools. His first priority was to ensure the horses were safe within their own stalls when he brought them down. Any protruding nails, splintered boards, worn and uneven flooring, and missing kick boards would need to be taken care of immediately. His next order of business was to work on one or two of the paddocks so that he could let the horses out. Jake knew Aleisha preferred Days outside rather than cooped up in a stall. With his thick Connemara coat, it made sense. She didn’t choose pasture board out of lack of funds, for there were cheaper options around Lansing than James’s farm. Once Jake brought the horses onto the farm, he’d walk one of the larger pastures.

Jake’s search began in the barn. He searched the tack room at the back of the barn. It wasn’t connected to power anymore, despite the wired lights in the ceiling. It was another project to add to his list as he helped Aleisha out. With the help of a strong flashlight beam, Jake determined that Aleisha’s grandpa did not keep his tools in the tack room.

He next searched the house, guiltily riffling through places he thought could be logical resting places for tools. The house didn’t have a lot of space to begin with, and his rummaging abruptly ended.

If Aleisha’s grandparents had any tools, which had to be the case on a working farm, they had to live in the garage. That was locked. Aleisha hadn’t made a move to hide her keys from Jake before she disappeared into the abyss that was her bedroom. She hadn’t made a secret of where she kept them, but left them exactly where she threw them down when they first entered the house. Jake grabbed them before heading outside.

The garage was detached from the house, and almost twice the side. Three car doors and a single person door decorated the front. Jake found the correct key for the people door with ease, and let himself in. Finding the light switch, Jake was happy to see that the power worked. One bulb near the back flashed bright and burnt out upon the flick of the switch, but he still had enough illumination to see by.

The building was fairly cluttered with small and large machinery, but Jake could still navigate through everything to take a look around. Aleisha’s grandfather kept his riding lawn tractor, a second larger tractor, and a myriad of attachments inside the garage. He had a table saw, a big air compressor, and a couple work benches from a quick look around. If Jake really felt like snooping, he would find all sorts of goodies. This garage was a place of business.

Jake made his way over to one work bench, looking around and collecting the tools that he would need, and possibly need, for the projects ahead of him. Aleisha’s grandfather wasn’t a particularly orderly man, but Jake was able to discern a logical pattern easily enough. Finding the correct nails proved to be the hardest part of the hunt. Placing everything in a five gallon bucket for ease, Jake returned to the barn.

Opening the stall windows for better lighting, Jake set to work. He began by taking off a busted kick board from the first stall, replacing it with a spare piece of wood stacked on the other side of the barn. Jake didn’t have a lot of supplies to start out with, but he figured what was laying around the barn would be enough to bring the horses down.

Kneeling down on the dirt floor, using his knee to hold the new board in place, Jake reached around to grab the hammer. He touched something furry rather than cold and hard. “What the –” Jake spat. Startled, Jake nearly dropped the board on his toe, until he realized the creature meant him no harm.

Three cats materialized around the stall, all staring intently at Jake working inside. The nearest was a very light calico with fairly dull amber eyes. The second cat was marked, like it had points on its face. The third hardly existed, its black coat melding with the deep shadows of the dimly lit barn, but its green eyes eerily giving away its presence. All three cats were very fluffy, and very friendly.

Tentatively, Jake held out a hand to the calico cat, whom immediately pressed its head into his palm. A loud, uneven purr rumbled from its chest. The calico’s happiness sparked the attention of the pointed one, and it joined in on rubbing against Jake. Jake didn’t have much of a choice but to give them attention. Even when he tried to turn back to his work, the cats remained persistent. He couldn’t persuade them to get their furry, purring bodies out of the way. Managing to nudge one to the side to grab the hammer and a small handful of nails, he twisted to find a different cat firmly planted in his lap, the feather duster of a tail whacking him repeatedly in the face. Around the obstacle, Jake couldn’t get a hold of the board and nail it into place.

Maybe they needed food. Jake didn’t know how long it had been until the cats had eaten. Judging by the level of their friendliness, they required sustenance from this barn specifically. He rose to his feet, the cats swirling about his feet like a miniature storm. The black cat began letting out short, halted meows. It didn’t sound like it could fully meow, but it still wanted something of Jake.

Again, Jake began riffling through the barn, opening bins and tins, on the hunt for cat food. All the while, the cats ran about his feet frantically, nearly tripping him on more than one occasion. Coming up incredibly empty-handed, Jake turned his search back to the garage. The cats continued their attack outside, meowing and weaving around and about his feet without taking head of their safety. Soon, defeated, Jake returned to his work on the stalls without feeding them, his effectiveness slashed by the cats’ interference. Now that the cats knew of Jake’s presence, they would not leave him alone.

Before long, Jake finished up the two stalls the horses would need, two of the paddocks, and two of the three pastures. Jake uncovered more lumber as he worked in the rafters of the old barn to replace what was broken. The fencing was taken care of with simple strands of wire or large staples. Jake appreciated the work as his voicebox filled with messages from his father, and the apprehension of returning back to his home expanded exponentially.

Returning, unfortunately, was unavoidable.

Jake left for Lansing early one day, tensing for the confrontation, but set on returning to Hillsdale with both ponies in tow. He had long enough to get out of his truck when James marched out of the nearest barn.

“Where have you been?” James demanded in a roar.

Jake tucked the keys into his coat pocket, securing them. “I’ve been helping Aleisha,” he said unwaveringly. His voice remained strong, but he couldn’t bring himself to lift his eyes.

“You haven’t done chores in days!”

“I told you,” Jake grunted, “that might be a possibility.” Despite himself, he added glibly, “They got covered?”

“Of course they got covered!” James boomed. “You know what happens when we miss their schedule.”

“Uh-huh,” Jake mumbled. He locked his eyes on James’s hands, still safely far away from Jake. James’s anger was palpable, growing the longer Jake remained passive. “But the fact remains that they got covered.” Before one of those hands could connect, Jake sidestepped away and power walked over to the house. He even reached the door and made it through before James caught up with him. The storm door shut naturally behind him, swinging sharply closed in James’s face.

“Get back here boy!” James demanded, nearly ripping the door from its hinges. He stomped threateningly behind Jake as Jake navigated the house to his room, catching up with him in the doorway. He grabbed him by the collar of his coat, shoving him into the frame. “I was talkin’ to you!”

Jake frowned, still avoiding his father’s eyes, and struggled to breathe against the wood pressed into his back.

“You ain’t to leave an’ have me cover your chores, Jacob! Chasin’ tail ain’t gonna get you anywhere. Your job is here.”

Jake tried to wiggle out of James’s grip to no avail. “I ain’t chasin’ tail,” he said with disgust. “Leave off.” Jake brought up both arms to break James’s hold on him, succeeding enough to withdraw into his room. “I do the work of at least three men in your business and don’t ask for wages. Only food and board. I do work for others on the side throughout seasons to raise enough money to pay entirely for Tick Tock an’ dressage. That’s not cheap. Of course, you would know that. For what’s probably the first time since I can remember, I tell you I need some personal tie, and you’re gonna get mad at me?” Jake could almost see the steam rising from James’s ears, beat red to match his face. “I don’t want to sound like one of those whiney asshole kids, but I’m twenty-four. Don’t you think it’s time I showed interest in a little bit of my own life?”

James didn’t say anything or move from his spot where he stood. His breathing came hard and uneven, and Jake swore that he saw a debate in his eyes. It wouldn’t be the first time James beat him around the house over something stupid, but this situation was far from stupid. In the first time in his life, Jake showed interest in something outside of the Fuller’s Estates. He wouldn’t forever be a full-time stable hand, groom, trainer, handy man, and eventually heir to the business and property.

“Get out,” James finally said. His voice came low and calm, more dangerous than his bellowing before. “Pack your bags an’ get out.”

“I don’t have any bags to pack,” Jake shot back much too quickly for his brain to process.

“Don’t come back,” James continued. “Go live your other life. Hope the pussy’s worth it.”

“I said I have some personal things to work out!” Jake shouted. He stepped forward, his own temper rising. “You think that means I have some secret life behind your back, on top of everything I just listed?”

There was the contact Jake expected. James swung his hand around and backhanded Jake as hard as he could muster across the face, throwing him off balance. He squared himself against his son, livid. Jake rose to his full height again, feeling his lip split, but didn’t give his father the benefit of seeing him react. This would be his last beating.

“You better hope those personal issues give you a place to live. I want that stupid pony out of my barn today. Your tack, too.” He turned around, striking out with his fist to the wall. Without another word, he retraced his steps back out the door.

Jake slumped against his bed. “Ya gotta be fuckin’ kidding me,” he breathed. The confrontation was much better than he’d expected, but he never thought he’d get thrown out. Suddenly Aleisha was his only option. He hoped that he could convince her to continue being so hospitable, even if it had only been accidental thus far.

“Shit,” he whispered, regaining his composure. He returned to the doorway and flicked on the light to his room. He didn’t have a whole lot for possessions, but his trip to grab Aleisha’s horse suddenly got a lot more complicated.

Marie, Jake’s mother, showed up as Jake worked on emptying his drawers. She knocked lightly on the doorframe. “Is everything alright?” she asked.

“’S fine,” Jake mumbled.

“What was that about?”

“I got kicked out,” Jake told her. He could feel her searching his posture and movements, but he couldn’t face her, either.

“I can go talk to him –” Marie started.

Jake stopped mid-motion and turned. “No,” he said firmly. “Don’t even think of doin’ that for me. I’ve got a back-up plan and I don’t need you gettin’ hurt. He’s blown his cap. Don’t make it worse.”

Marie stayed silent and scanned his room. “Where are you going?”

Jake returned to pulling his drawers clears to stack onto his bed. He wasn’t sure what he was going to do with the clothes after that. He didn’t have a lot, but as he told his father, he didn’t have any bags, either. “I’ll be staying with Aleisha until she kicks me out, too.”

“Aleisha? You have a girlfriend?”

“She’s not my girlfriend,” Jake assured her. “She’s a boarder here. Was a boarder here. Her grandfather died and I’m helping her sort things out. I came home for a change of clothes and her horse, but ….” He sighed. “Well, I guess I’m taking a little more than that.” With his last stack of pants in hand, he faced his mother again. “You should probably leave me. Before he gets mad at you, too.”

“But Jake –”

“No, really, Mom. I’ve got it all under control. I’ll be fine.” He set down his pants and walked up to her, arms out. “I love you.”

Marie took Jake in her arms, pulling him tight and close. “I love you, too. Stay safe, Jake.”

“I will. Please, don’t worry about me.”

“I’m you mother,” she said. “I’ll always worry about you.”

Jake released her and took his show clothes off the hangers. “Can I take one of the pillow cases?” he asked. “To carry this in?”

Marie’s eyes grew wet and she nodded. “Of course. You’ll stay in touch, right?”

Jake gently pulled the pillow case off his pillow and stared loading up the clothes. “I don’t know, Mom.” He gathered up the full pillow case and his show clothes in his arms. “I need to get going. I still need to hook up the trailer to my truck and load up two horses without Dad getting worse before I go. Last thing I need is him followin’ me all around.”

“Be careful,” she said.

“I will, Mom. I promise.”

He shuffled past her, down the hallway, and out of the house. James was nowhere in sight as he walked across the driveway to load his truck with his clothes. Climbing in again, he started it up to line it up with the horse trailer. This particular trailer was a touch smaller than what his father preferred to use, but since both Tick Tock and Days were smaller horses, Jake figured he could get away with taking the trailer for at least a little while.

After hooking up the hitch, Jake did a complete assessment of his surroundings. Somehow, his father remained absent. While Jake would have loved to keep his truck running and warm for a quick getaway, he didn’t trust his father to not swipe the keys and keep them from him. Despite him saying that he wanted Jake gone, Jake had a feeling that if he stayed around much longer, he and his mother would be in for the worst of James’s wrath yet.

Tucking his truck keys back in his pocket, double-checking that his doors were locked, Jake wandered through the nearest barn where Tick Tock was stalled. The gelding poked his nose into the aisle at Jake’s footsteps. Jake couldn’t tell if he recognized Jake’s gait specifically, or if he was alert enough to pay attention to everyone going in and out of the barn. Ignoring his friend, Jake ducked into the tack room to gather his things. He had a couple saddles, saddle pads, a bridal, some training instruments, and Tick Tock’s lightly worn blanket. The grooming tools and feed all belonged to his father and Jake didn’t feel comfortable taking it.

Taking a couple trips back and forth, Jake loaded all of his things into his truck bed as quickly as he could. He had nowhere else to fit it. Once he had everything of his packed, he went searching for Aleisha’s. Aleisha didn’t keep Days stall boarded, but he knew she had some items stored in one of the barns. Finding anything beyond his halter would probably have to wait until the day she could pick her car up.

Chancing a guess at one of the halters, Jake retreated back to Tick Tock. He knew Tick Tock. He knew that he would load and stay without a problem. Days was a mystery. Again, Tick Tock stuck his nose through the bars of his tall when Jake approached.

“Hey buddy,” Jake called softly to his horse. “How’re you?”

Tick Tock retracted his nose from the door so that Jake could open it and join him in his stall, halter in hand.

“We’re going to go on a road trip, but won’t be coming back here. You’re gonna have a new home, okay?”

Tick Tock lowered his head for Jake to slip his halter over his nose and ears. As Jake buckled it up, he let out a long snort.

“It’s not the prettiest barn down there, but it just needs a little help. If Aleisha lets us stay. So you put on your best act and impress her, okay?”

Jake wasn’t sure if it was because of his quicker pace than normal, or his heightened fear of his father approaching him again, but Tick Tock’s hooves sounded remarkably loud against the concrete floor of the barn. They sounded as loud outside the barns on the gravel as well. In a hurried state, Jake threw the lead rope over Tick Tock’s back and asked him to load. Within seconds, Tick Tock was in the trailer, waiting for caramels. Jake administered them from the other side of the trailer while securing him in for the trip. Next came Days.

The trek out to the pasture where Snow Day Today and Remember My Wish was a fairly long one. “Days!” Jake called. The horse twitched his ear at him, but didn’t otherwise move. Wish picked his head up from the grazing spot pawed from the snow, and then promptly lowered it again. Jake knew that Aleisha could get Days to canter right up to her, but he was obviously not her.

Opening the gate, the halter and lead rope for Days slung over his shoulder, he picked his way through the field to get to the horses. Wish spun and found a new patch of snow to disturb for greens. Days finally acknowledged Jake with a great, sniffing muzzle. Jake almost ran into the plush flesh of his lips. “Oh hi!” he called, taking a step backwards. “We’re going to go on a little trip, buddy.” Days followed him, getting as close as possible to Jake’s face without knocking him over. Every deep breath pushed moisture into Jake’s face. “Thanks,” Jake said ungraciously. Seemingly satisfied, Days lowered his face and pushed at Jake’s pockets, effectively frisking him. “God,” Jake admonished. He held up the halter. “I really don’t have time for this.”

Days knew the sight of the halter and what it meant. Whatever work Aleisha did do with her horse appeared to have paid off. Jake had him haltered up and out of the field within moments. Loading him up was almost as easy. He wasn’t as obedient as Tick Tock and didn’t load himself, but it was close enough. Following Jake into the trailer was like following him anywhere else.

As soon as he was inside and immobile, Days starting frisking Jake for treats again. “Okay, okay!” Jake cried, pulling a caramel out of his pocket. He handed it over to the horse, whom was very fond of slobbering things. “Here you go!” Tick Tock gave Jake a side eye as he watched one of his favorite caramels disappear into the mouth of another horse.

Jake threw the each a couple flakes of hay, checked the trailer over for safety issues, and started his truck up again to leave. As he pushed the truck into drive, he saw his father standing in the doorway of the house. When he went back inside, Jake didn’t know. Nor did he care. Instead, he was on his way to what was hopefully his new, albeit temporary, home.

Jake used the rest of the day to unload the horses, pick up a ridiculously priced bale of hay from a local farm store, and then unwind.

The following morning, Jake finally decided to confront Aleisha. He knocked to no avail. Holding in a breath, he tried the door to find it unlocked. Swinging it open, he stepped inside. He room was relatively plain. The few accents it had were ore frilly and girly than he expected from Aleisha, but that was enough to show him how little he knew about this girl. “Aleisha!” he called. He strode over to the window beside her bed and flung the dressings open. He hoped he wasn’t making a mistake; he needed her to keep him around.

Murky light from the permanently overcast winter sky permeated the room. Aleisha groaned from under the covers. Jake turned to face the haphazard clump. “Nope you’re done. I appreciate this is a hard hit, but I can’t let you mope in here forever.”

“Jacob?”

“Jake,” he corrected. “Get up. Days needs to see you.”

“Days?” Aleisha grumbled.

“Are you decent?” Without waiting for an answer, Jake grabbed the covers and pulled them away. She appeared to be wearing the same clothes she had when they first arrived at the house. Of course, Jake didn’t have a lot to ridicule her on, considering he only had the one set of clothes until the day before. At least she was clothed. Jake didn’t need to see anything more. “C’mon. You’ll feel better moving around. Trust me.”

“Why are you still here?” Aleisha asked drowsily. She rolled over, squinting heavily at his face.

Jake’s heart caught in his throat. He was about to be homeless. “I still ned to bring you back to my dad’s farm to get your car,” Jake replied smoothly. He’d bring up his homelessness problem at a later time. Right now, he couldn’t risk to anger her. She didn’t move. Her legs faced away from him, her torso twisted so that she could look him in the face. Her eyes gradually adjusted to the winter light from outside.

Jake sighed and sat down on the bed beside her. “Look, I know I don’t have any right to tell you what to do. I just –” He cut off quickly when she rolled over and wrapped her arms around him, burying her face into his leg. Her body shook ever so slightly, like she was having a difficult time breathing. Feeling awkward, Jake reached around and rubbed her on the back between her shoulders. It took him a minute to realize she was crying. He allowed her the emotional release, unsure of what else he should do.

After a couple minutes, Aleisha pulled away. Her eyes were puffy and wet, and her cheeks carried the pattern of his jeans. “I’m sorry,” she sniffled. She sat upright with effort, putting a little more distance between the two of them. “You’re welcome to stay as long as you want. I’ve been such a terrible host.

“Actually,” Jake started, uncertain. He swallowed. “I got kicked out of my father’s house….”

“Oh my God, I’m so sorry,” Aleisha gushed.

Jake looked away. “Might turn out to be a blessing in the long run.” He felt like he was intruding, more and more.

“What happened?” Aleisha asked quietly.

“I didn’t come home for chores the day I brought you here,” Jake told her truthfully. “Or … until yesterday. Look, I –” He felt like a beggar.

Aleisha forced a smile on to her face. She was pushing past her pain for him? “I told you, you’re welcome to stay here. I’m afraid it’s all I can do, though.”

“Tick Tock?” Jake asked. “I’ll pay for everything, of course.” He just needed permission.

“Is he still over there?”

“No,” Jake answered quietly.

“Here?”

More quietly: “Yes.”

“Good.” She extracted herself from her delicate state to quickly, Jake almost felt like he should have bothered her sooner.

“Days, too. I kinda stole his trailer.”

“So long as he doesn’t hunt you down and trespass here, that’s your business. You and your dad didn’t get along?” She hugged her knees, physically holding herself together. Maybe she was only putting up a mask for her state. She appeared to be brightening up quickly, but she still wasn’t completely here.

Jake scanned her room, looking for something else to focus on. The decorations around the room looked too young for Aleisha. “No, not really.”

“I’m sorry.”

Jake immediately looked back to her. “Don’t. It’s not your fault. Don’t worry ‘bout it.” He stood up from the side of the bed, turning to offer her his hand. Aleisha stared at it for a moment before unwrapping her arms from around her legs to take it. She swung her legs around so her feet were inches from the floor, and she used his support to help her stand up.

“Breakfast? I can make, um, toast.”

Aleisha leaned her head against his shoulder. Whatever barriers she had erected between the two of them from placing him as a faraway idol quickly dissipated. Jake would rather her treat him as an equal than a superior anyway. He was glad that she didn’t take his intrusion as a problem, at the very least. He needed to make sure he didn’t cross any lines. He was certain he was toeing them before this interaction.

“Is there any milk?” Aleisha asked. “I wouldn’t mind a plain bowl of cereal.”She followed him, refusing to let go, through the house to get to the kitchen.

“Uh, yeah. I bought some a couple days ago, so it’s still good.”

“You know how grandparents have a knack for finding food that you’ve never seen before in your life? Either they make it or it’s some off brand hidden in the dark depths of the grocery store?”

Jake couldn’t say he knew what she was talking about, but the question turned out to be rhetorical.

“My grandma was great at that, especially with cereal. Eating it will be like returning home.” The thought brought another wave of grief, so she buried her face back in his shoulder.

Jake delicately lead her to the counter nearest the refrigerator, making sure she would stand on her own before gathering the things she would need for her bowl of cereal. He’d gotten fairly good at navigating the kitchen while she barricaded herelf in the room. He set a bowl and spoon next to her, and then moved to open the fridge door in one smooth movement. Taking out the milk, he set it down next to the arrangement of dishes. Aleisha grabbed the cereal. Her grandmother had it stored in a tall transparent tub above the fridge with no indication of what was inside.

“I’m sorry I left you all alone the past couple days,” she apologized after she settled down to eat.

Jake waved his hand. Her couple of days was a little off base, but he didn’t mind the alone time. “Don’t worry about it. I managed to get a few things done while you were in your room. I’ll take you out to see once you’ve finished your breakfast.”

“Aren’t you going to eat?” Aleisha asked. She suddenly looked very concerned over his lack of food.

“Already had a little somethin’ before I woke you up,” Jake assured her.

“I wasn’t really asleep,” Aleisha admitted. “I don’t now if I’ve really slept the entire time we’ve been here. I’ve felt so tired and depressed, but I’ve only had fitful naps. I usually just end up laying there, eyes open or closed, day dreaming or something.”

“All the more reason you need to get moving,” Jake said. “You have a life ahead of yourself. Honor your grandparents by living it.”

Aleisha cracked a small smile. “Hai, sensei Jacob Fuller.”

“Finish up,” Jake encouraged with a roll of his eye. “There are animals in that barn that really want to see you.”

“Animals?” Aleisha echoed.

“Days and those blasted cats. Can’t get anything done with those fuzzy rags prowlin’ about.” Even after Jake spent money on food for them, they continued to follow him around the barnyard.

“How many?” Aleisha asked. She sounded excited.

“Three.”

She gave an unconscious shrug, a little disappointment curbing her excitement. “What colors?”

“One black, one most white with colored points, and a calico.”

“Aww, my babies. That’s Marble and Lily for sure. The black could be a couple different cats,” Aleisha told him. “There used to be a couple more hanging around, but I bet you would have seen them around with those three if they were still here.” She drank the milk from the bowl and brought it over to the sink. “So what kind of things did you get done?”

Jake grabbed her coat from beside the door and held it up for her to get it on. She held out her arms to slip them into the sleeves and pulled the zipper closed to keep in the warmth. While she dealt with getting her shoes on, Jake got dressed for the weather as well. They exited the house together. Jake led the way, following the path he’d already carved through the snow to the barn. He opened the door for Aleisha and stood aside for her to enter.

Aleisha flicked on the light, but it didn’t do much good. Most of the light Jake used to see by came through the windows or door from outside. She had to stand stationary for a moment until her eyes adjusted to the dimness inside.

Days, upon realizing Aleisha stood there along with Jake, let out a long whinny.

“Hey, buddy!” Aleisha called. She held out her hands as she strode over to the stall. “I’m sorry I’ve been gone so long.” She reached through the bars of the door to scratch at his nose. Even in his enthusiasm, Days didn’t appear to like the nose attention as much and pulled his face away. “Brat,” she giggled.

She then walked over to Tick Tock’s stall, greeting him as well. Jake couldn’t help but smile at the tenderness she showed the pumpkin pony as opposed to her own pony. Jake accepted it as sensible, considering that he and Tick Tock were unobtainable demi-gods at his father’s barn. He still couldn’t believe that that was how she viewed the two of them. There was more to life than inside the dressage arena, even for Jake and Tick Tock.

“You did a great job,” Aleisha said, more clearly than the soft words she spoke to Jake’s horse.

“What?” Jake asked, having been pulled out of his own thoughts.

“The stalls,” she clarified. “They look nice. They haven’t looked this nice since I was a little girl. As the horses disappeared from the farm, they took bits and pieces of the barn with them. Not just the tack and warm bodies, but the spirits of the horses seemed to hold this barn together. Without the horses, things fell apart. You gave the barn its life and purpose back.” She turned around to fully face him. “Thank-you.”

Jake shifted. “Uh, that’s not all. Grab Days.” Jake reached for Tick Tock’s halter, entered his stall, and slipped it on. Leading him out, he attached a lead rope and dropped it to the ground. Tick Tock, groomed for show, needed his blanket. He threw it on and latched it into place within seconds.

Jake and Tick Tock led the way out the barn, and then to the nearest pasture he had patched up. “I walked it last night to double-check everything’s tip-top,” he explained to Aleisha. “Does it matter if Days goes first or not?”

Aleisha shook her head. “Jake, I don’t know what to say.”

Again, Jake shrugged her off. “Nothin’. Just givin’ me a place to stay until I figure things out is enough.” He opened the gate, led Tick Tock through, and released the lead from his halter. “I should be the one sayin’ thank-you.”

“Where have you been sleeping?” Aleisha asked with a blink. She released Days behind Tick Tock, then stepped through the gate to watch them.

“On the couch,” Jake replied. It sounded more like a question than a reply, as if the answer was obvious. He nodded his head in the direction of the barn with intentions of throwing the horses a couple flakes as they sorted themselves out.

Aleisha’s eyes widened. “Oh. I’m so sorry.” She followed back to the barn, wringing her hands together. “I should have made up a room for you.”

“Don’t worry ‘bout it. Speaking of sleeping arrangements, you keepin’ your teeny bedroom you’e always had, or you gonna claim the master bedroom as yours?”

Aleisha tore her eyes away from him, watching the snow crunch under her feet. “It feels wrong.”

Jake licked his lip, careful of the crusted over split. “Even though this is your house now? You gonna stay here or go back to MSU?”

“I’m staying,” she said with fierce finality. “Something about staying feels … right. It needs to be rejuvenated and brought back to its formal glory. My dream was to work with horses ever since I was a little girl. My grandpa is making it reality in his dying wish. I can’t shoot him down.”

Jake nodded as he grabbed a flake for each horse. “And you’re sure I can stay?”

“Of course!” Aleisha said quickly. “I can’t help but feel responsible for being part of the reason you got kicked out. Plus, I could use you around here.” She paused, her eyes losing focus as if she were thinking about something big. Like she was recalling a plan she had mulled over for a good period of time. “Look, I was thinking…. I can’t pay you or anything because even with inheritance, I’m a little broke. But I can give you and Tick Tock a place to stay in exchange for your help around the barn? And, once spring comes along, we can build an arena and you can start making your own money around here by giving lessons or something?”

Jake stopped in the doorway of the barn in surprise. She wasn’t kidding when she said she didn’t mind him staying. She went from avoiding him around the barnyard to inviting him into her home to stay within a matter of days.

“It’s a better deal than I got at my dad’s,” Jake told her. “Do you plan on boarding horses, too?”

“Of course,” Aleisha said. “How many good stalls do I have?”

“Just the two at the moment, but I can have the others fixed up real quick.” He continued out the door, his eyes finding the horses as soon as they were within sight again.

“Right. I have the pastures on top of the paddocks, but I think I’ll keep a look out for eight boarded horses. If they want pasture kept, that’s fine, but I don’t want more than one horse per stall on this property. At least not yet. I’ll have to go through my grandpa’s old connections to see if anyone has some hay they can bring over me and stock up the barn.”

“I got a few bales from a local farmer off Craigslist, but I don’t got a lot’a money left.”

Aleisha pressed her lips together. “Sorry. I really appreciate you feeding Days and taking care of things. I’ll pay it back to you.” She watched as Jake threw the hay over the fence.

“How many acres is this farm built on?” he asked out of mild curiosity.

“A hundred, give or take.”

“Damn.”

“A good thirty or so is wooded with trails. I’ll show you around some day.” She paused, watching Days come up and nose one of the flakes into the snow. “It’s not like it’s a maze back there or anything. It’s fairly easy to find your back to the yard once you want back. You’re welcome back there any time. We’ve never leased the land out to hunters.”

“Thanks.”

“Way I see it, what’s mine is yours.” She let out a breath and headed back toward the house, her hands deep into her pockets. “So I think I’m going to call around for the hay tomorrow, and if I find someone that can help us out, I’ll head over to library and put up an ad to find some boarders. My grandparents never really learned what the internet was. It was too much to get them cell phones. They still have a landline.” She chuckled. “There’s something so cozy about technology dated in our childhood. It’s amazing how much things have changed the past few years.”

“Are you sure ‘cozy’ is the right word?” Jake asked. “I think you mean ‘familiar’. I’m not sayin’ a flip phone is from when I was a kid, but whenever I had people to talk to, it was downright annoying when they’d rather send a text than call. What makes people think texting is a more efficient way of communicatin’?” He wouldn’t admit that he’d sent his dad a text rather than call when he wasn’t going to make it for chores. That was a different story.

Aleisha’s eyebrows shot up and her lips tucked in, like she was holding in a laugh. “Why don’t I formally show you to your room?” she asked as she let them back inside the house. “Consider it yours. Do what you need to do to it to make it feel like home.” She kicked off her shoes, shrugged off her coat, and crossed over the living room to the hallway. There, she opened up the door that belonged neither to her room or the bathroom.

The room was rather plain and a touch small. It had a small dressed tucked against the wall, leaving just enough space for a double bed to stretch out across the middle. The quilt was old and worn, but completely functional. A nightstand hugged the opposing corner of the room, completing the furnished feel. Drape hung down from behind the bed, concealing one window, to give the illusion of a little more space.

“Thanks,” Jake said. He brushed past her to feel the firmness of the bed. It was a little old and protested the pressure, but it would still beat the couch.

“Closet –” Aleisha pointed to the double-wide door behind the main door “-dresser, bed, and the rest is up to you. If you want, you can come with me when I got to the library to pick up some paint.”

“What? No,” Jake said quickly. “That’s not necessary. This is fine. I’ll only be spendin’ nights in here anyway.”

Aleisha shrugged. “It’s up to you. Um … wanna take me shopping so I can make us dinner? We’re probably going to have to make another trip to grab my car.”

Jake tossed a smile in her direction. “Sure, let’s go.”

Next >

#horseblr #horse art #equine art #horse story #harpg #connemara pony #snow day today #jake fuller #kifuart #i'm glad i finally get to use this picture for its intended purpose #story is real frankensteined from the first story so i'm a little proud about that #but that store? that store i'm describing? was a real store #not in frontier so i'm hoping i'm not giving frontier a horrible rep for no real reason #i've never actually been to frontier before #but like that store was a tirp #burned down a few years back and i haven't gone in since then #but it was the only store around for absolute miles #pretty sure those oreos we found were at least four years past the expiration date #yr01

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david-watts · 1 month

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damn I forgot how good the first episode of the x files is

#like genuinely I know why I was obsessed with the show. especially in 2019 #yes I am in part rewatching it to pretend that it's 2019 again. I want to make things right this time #and if that means believing I am seventeen years old and I have to plan my exit then so be it.#gonna admit I feel like over the past few weeks don't know exactly when it started I have been regressed in my age estimation #my perceived age is all over the place I've gone from twelve to twenty-four this year alone but recently it's. seventeen. I don't know why #this is what happens when you've got a cocktail of things wrong with you

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tierracottas · 3 months

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just found out this store in my neighborhood closed for good and i'm so sad about it... it was my favorite (also the most affordable) and the family who owned it was so friendly and they had the sweetest dog too. loved going there every week during the lockdown to get ice cream & coffee packets & sour candy :(

#i thought they were just closed for the first week of the year but i saw their gate open and their set up was all gone...#i was hoping to cheer myself up with the usual ice cream i used to buy from them #i've been so out of it the past few days

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varadasethus · 4 months

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I love Twelve so much, he's everything

#this kind of meaningless post i would normally save for twitter. but i just... love him so much #the past year he's gone from kinda joint fave with ten to my shining star. my perfect angel. my one and only.#i almost want to change my icon. almost. i won't. but he would tempt me.#i now have the s10 steelbook and it faces me where i am most of the day. and i love being reminded of him and of bill all the time #my loves #i recently did a rewatch of his era but already want to do another one #peter capaldi do a convention PLEASE i know I've been in your presence once before but i didn't know then what i know now.#and i didn't actually meet you anyway you just walked past me a few times and did a q&a in the same room as me #now I've met dt i do think he's my bucket list actor to meet. followed by christopher eccleston and billie piper.#(and louise marwood but that's unrelated)#(i really should just go to her play shouldn't i? i just... can't be arsed with the time it takes to get back from battersea)

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irrealisms · 2 months

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i've seen a lot of people talk about mcyt as a constantly burning library of alexandria recently, and to some extent that's true. people are constantly deleting their blogs, going scorched earth with animatics, fanfics, etc., that they made. but i've also seen people (three in the last few days!) make this claim about VODs, when talking about large fandoms like DSMP and QSMP, and.... guys. that was true in 2020. that's not true anymore. archivists have been working tirelessly for years now to make sure that isn't true.

the dsmp VOD masterlist is here. in november 2020, it's missing 16 VODs, if i am counting correctly--which is still a fairly small minority, but it's a lot, and it sucks!--but in november of 2021, it's missing one, and that's because the cc of that VOD does copyright takedowns, not because the archivists didn't save it. no one in the archivist project is deleting VODs off youtube with no backups the way people are deleting fanfics. three months ago, one of my dsmp archivist friends finished coding a tool that let them reconstruct VODs out of twitch clips, and reconstructed six tubbo dsmp VODs from 2020. not only are we basically not losing VODs anymore, we are actively gaining VODs that have been lost for years, that were thought to be lost forever. the library isn't burning anymore; it's being rebuilt.

the qsmp VOD masterlist is here. it is usually a month or two behind the present day, to give creators time to archive their own VODs, but... look at it. in january of 2024, every single qsmp vod was archived. the same is true of december of 2023, and november, and the vast majority of months for the past year.

i'm not going to say that there isn't a problem. just a few days ago, i realized that a lifesteal VOD from last year was missing--that its youtube upload was messed up somehow, and no one noticed and it wasn't mirrored on the internet archive and the person who uploaded it deleted the original file. and now it's gone forever. this made me super sad! like i said: i'm not going to say that there isn't a problem.

but... look at the lifesteal VOD masterlist here. lifesteal's a smaller fandom than qsmp or dsmp. open the 2022 tab and you'll see months and months of lost VODs, of no one's VODs being saved, because there weren't any archivists saving them. then open the 2023 tab and see: they lost four VODs, over the course of a year. even in smaller fandoms, archivists are working. they're making progress. they're saving VODs. in 2024, lifesteal archivists screenrecorded five streams on tumblr live to make sure they would not become lost media. mcyt may be a constantly burning library of alexandria, but the people with fire extinguishers are dedicated. they're making incredible progress. i know people with petabytes of VODs saved, who have spent money on extra storage for this. i know people who are constantly running up against their storage limits as they download/upload to the internet archive/delete for space/rinse and repeat. a decent fraction of the time, my internet at home is slow because it's downloading VODs.

and these aren't the only mcyt fandoms with archiving projects! the outsiders smp VOD masterlist is here. origins smp VOD masterlist is here. smp earth VOD masterlist is here. rats smp VOD masterlist is here. there are so many others that i just don't happen to know about. the older and smaller a fandom is, the more likely it is to not have an attached archiving project, or for the archive to be missing a lot of VODs. but... guys, we've saved a lot. there are people out there, working tirelessly to save even more. yes, mourn what we have lost--the archivists i know are also the ones mourning the most for the VODs that are, in fact, forever lost media. but don't dismiss how much people have saved. we are making progress. we are losing less and less every month. the vast majority of the dsmp and qsmp still exist, i am not going to say they're the same experience as watching live because they're really not, but.. they're out there. people have put in a lot of work to save them.

if you have publicly available VOD masterlists or other mcyt archiving projects that aren't on this post, please add them in a reblog. i want this post to serve as a reference for how much archivists have saved in this community; unfortunately, i'm not super connected to every community. but i know that--for every person deleting things, there are people working, tirelessly & with little external reward, in so many different mcyt fandoms, to save things. and we should appreciate that more often.

#therapists dni #any british ants in the chat?#AND EVERYONE SAY THANK YOU TO FAIRY RAVE!!!!!!!!

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literalgrill · 4 months

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Do NOT Support Hard Drive On Patreon

You might see friends today suggesting you support Hard Drive on Patreon today. You know, the funny video games version of The Onion? As a journalist, I will firmly tell you DO NOT GIVE THEM A DIME.

The CEO has pushed out all former staff that have built the site up to its current greatness and has been pushing the use of AI. The staff begged to have a Patreon before basically all being pushed out, but the idea was refused until now, when it will only line the pockets of a single person instead of hard working writers.

I know they might have provided laughs before, but Hard Drive is a shell of what it was once. Let it die and support the people who actually made those moments of joy possible. Don't believe me? Check out what former employees are saying below:

Kevin Podas: Okay you know what, I would feel bad saying nothing about this, so here goes:🚨SAVE YOUR MONEY🚨

We passionately advocated for a Patreon at Hard Drive & were aggressively shot down. The talent & people who built the site were pushed out. To see this now is beyond upsetting. For the past few years or so I put a lot of myself into this website. I pitched a ton of jokes, got over 120 articles published, & met a lot of great people. I'm sure if you've been following me for some time you could easily see this.

However, there is a lot of misinformation. I was eventually promoted to Managing Editor of the site & was ecstatic. Grateful for the opportunity. Felt like all of my hard work in the comedy mines was finally paying off. But things took a turn for the worst, & each day there were new surprises that affected our livelihoods. These were all very avoidable surprises, mind you.

A patreon was going to be our hail mary, but alas, for some reason, the power that be did not want it. Causing us to leave a dream job behind. "At least we did all we could," we consoled ourselves afterwards. I put a lot of myself into this project. I pitched all sorts of ideas that could have helped-- we all did. Merch collaborations, Patreon-integrated YouTube content, so much more. And most of them were shot down out of sheer stubbornness and nothing more. To see lie after lie spread, and multiple big publications and YouTubers that I am a fan of promote this Patreon under these pretenses is incredibly upsetting. There are so many receipts.

Please share this and consider pulling out if you've already put money into this. On Hard Drive using AI, also from Kevin Podas: I can't personally confirm that part aside from some of the recent header images for articles on both Hard Drive and Hard Times are being made with AI. As far as writing, it's been mentioned in the past, but I personally do not know. Maybe others do, maybe not. MORE From Kevin Podas suggesting the owner denying a Patreon being set up earlier cost an artist a job that was replaced by AI: We had a social media person who was awesome! He made the images until this AI implementation. He had to leave because ad revenue was low and a Patreon was aggressively refused.

Luca Fisher: at the risk of burning some bridges, i have to back up kevin here. i've only been part-time, in-and-out of hard drive since i got in last year, but i can corroborate that management doubled and tripled down about not hosting a patreon/crowdfunding and that many other suggestions and ideas, including mine (and ones much smarter than mine!), were shot down in really long, apocalyptic threads of everyone left on deck desperately trying to come up with ways to keep the lights on. managerially it has been messy and sad

i've written for multiple publications that have long since died, ones that were in the process of dying, and ones that, in this case, are soon to be put in the ground. it is sad and sucks every time. i don't know what could have been done differently, but i do know that a lot of great writers and content creators were left shorthanded and unhappy by the way things have gone. and it is sort of puzzling to see the sudden championing of patreon after we were all told plenty of times that it couldn't work and we should move on also, just to add my own personal two cents here, i was really disappointed by the shuttering of many different article sections on the site over the past 6-8 months. i understand cutting corners in a deficit, and i know it had to be done. that said…

all in all, i'm really sad to see this all happen. i don't fault anyone, if only because i don't really know enough about how this all can happen to make sense of it. games journalism is in a sad, sorry state, and will likely no longer be a thing in the next decade

VideoSealMan: I'm gonna say this because I think I deserve to. For months, MONTHS on end I was bugging Hard Drive management about a Patreon. Often I got ignored for a week+, but when I actually got a response I was encouraged to - of all things, write up a Google Doc pitching the concept I did it regardless. I wasn't the only one trying to sway management on a Patreon, but so fiercely was I fighting for it that last night, I was accused of making this comment directly by the CEO! With no evidence whatsoever! After I'd been gone for over a month.

I vouched so hard for Patreon because I wanted all the writers and creatives working with Hard Drive including myself to get paid better. When I actually got a response, the idea was often shut down. Eventually due to the state of my company, my pay was cut for a second time I confronted management alongside a couple other important figureheads at the org and told them that if we couldn't do a Patreon - I could no longer financially justify staying there. The answer was still no, so I left. Baffled at the decision, but whatever.

It is unendingly frustrating to know that myself and many other people who put their soul into Hard Drive LEFT because of management's absolute refusal to compromise on a Patreon, to then see them launch one anyway a month later and get over 1000 people pledging money. I'm seeing a lot of things float around about greed and people being fired. No one was fired. Everyone who left, left because they were sick of management's decision-making. And honestly, management is a lot of things but I would not call them greedy. (From my experience.) They did genuinely make an effort to pay people as much as possible. I found the pay very fair for a while. I am not disputing that I was paid what I was owed - yet management frequently feels the need to remind critics of that. Lmao, yes. I was paid what I was owed. No one is disputing payment. You did the bare minimum a business owner should do and paid everyone their due, very well done. I make no allegations of greed, cheating or foul play. I make allegations of poor management and incompetence that has fucked over other people.

Basically the only people left at Hard Drive have been there for about 2 months. They will reap the rewards of this successful Patreon I and so many others passionately fought for for so long. We will not see a dime.

I do not know the new people at Hard Drive, But I feel bad for them. They were haphazardly thrust into Hard Drive's workplace with little to no explanation on how anything works, or given any context on the state of the place. Even now managements feeds them half-truths and misinformation about other people's grievances. I am broke and have been for a while. I had to move out of my flat in Reading and back with my family because of how little money I was making. This has basically doomed my flatmate to moving back in with abusive parents, which is something I feel guilty about every day. If we had gone with the Patreon I worked myself hoarse over back then, this could have been avoided. Some of my other good pals could also not have been fucked over.

It was a bad judgment call, but it's not a crime. It's just management getting it wrong.

So should you give to the Hard Drive Patreon? I don't know! I don't think any of the new people working there to patch up the holes left by the recent mass exodus have any bad intentions. Maybe they deserve it! But it is not the same site you knew a year ago, or even a month ago. Myself and many people who were there far longer than me and did far more for it than I did are all gone now because we could not deal with management's terrible decision-making and dogass communication any longer. That's what you should know, imo

I had an agreement in place with management that I would receive the next 8 months of revenue from the Hard Drive YT channel from my leaving in November. This was a deal I appreciated, and thought was very fair on management's behalf. So far, the deal has been honoured for 2 months. However as of last night I was removed from the Hard Drive Slack without warning, and as an editor for the YouTube channel. This means I no longer have any way of verifying how much I am owed, I just have to take their word for it. I'm sure management will make their own statements full of half-truths and weird language on the many cases being brought against them - I'd take everything they say with a pinch of salt if some of the screenshots I've seen of them talking about me are any indication lol

To management; I do not want to talk to you. I want you to DM me a screenshot of how much I'm owed every month and then send me the money per our agreement until June, then we can go our separate ways. Do that and admit to your mistakes, and maybe you can recover your reputation! That's it from me, lol. If they pull out of the deal and fuck me over I'll have more to say, but most of what I know is other people's stories of incompetence and poor decision-making, lol. I genuinely get no pleasure out of doing this; I do not think management is evil - I just think they're really bad at what they do and it's cost other, more talented people, lol. You should believe the writers imo

One last thing I wanna say btw, management did often stress that no one should try to make Hard Drive a full time thing. They were transparent about that, and that is fair. I was working on it because at a few points, I was lead to believe we actually were doing a Patreon. Many other ppl have similar stories of being strung along by management changing their minds and stop-starting shit every 2 weeks. We all made the fatal mistake of overestimating our manager - who would tell you one thing one day and something totally opposite the next week lol

Hunter R. Thompson:

I'm not your dad, but speaking as a Hard Drive writer, I don't know that funding Hard Drive on Patreon is worth it

The driving talent on the back end—behind the kickass site I joined in 2019—have peaced out over the years as the site's been (in our view) increasingly mismanaged. Mismanagement like, not setting up crowdfunding before the ship sank and all its best crew failed; or publishing a screenshot of Andy Ngo pedojacketing a trans writer, complete with her deadname; or a disgruntled ex-writer getting falsely accused of shit-talk, by actual staff. I'm grateful for the writing I've gotten to produce for HD (and will forever be kicking myself for not writing even more, in the four years I've had to do it!! i'm a dumbass!!!) but it is very much no longer the site I signed up for.

I don't want to resign as a contributor altogether, because I'm open to the idea of the site recovering and bad practices being retired as finances level out-- it would just be dishonest for potential backers to not be Aware Of The Circumstances, I think.

Jeremy Kaplowitz: i truly don't want to start shit, but feel compelled to say: i want to see Hard Drive succeed w/o resorting to throwing former writers & editors, myself included, under the bus. surely there's a way to save the site without building it over the corpses of those who left. my $0.02 i don't blame anyone who wants to sign up for the HD patreon and i support the website, but that includes those who worked on it for years, have complaints, and don't deserve to be treated like bitter assholes like this kind of stuff is just objectively true, meanwhile there's these new writers who joined the site after i left (meaning, in the last ~3 months) claiming people are liars. decide for yourself if you care, but this is what happened! [Quotes this Tweet]

Seth Finkelstein: Writing for Hard Drive has been a privilege the past few years, and it makes me so angry to see people I looked up to get jerked around behind the scenes. The amount of grenades the editors jumped on our behalf is immense, and I don't think the way they're being treated is right.

Other Bits On AI: We do know for sure however that AI art has been used by the site. Its fucking owner confirms it here:https://twitter.com/MattSaincome/status/1743040541603123622. Seems the owner pushed AI written articles as well! TayFabe: My vaguetweet is making the rounds & these made me apoplectic. - owner regularly lobbied using ai. Once he tested it & said ai was writing better satire than 25% of the HT/HD writers. - ai images were used on the site & socials w/o consulting the team or disclosing it publicly I found the ai bit relevant to include bc 1) it illuminates a stark change in HD's current direction & leadership, 2) ai images have previously been used on the site and (since deleted) ig posts, 3) ai content fucking sucks, and repeatedly pushing to use it is a telling quality The "handful of writers who chose to leave" includes 2 editors-in-chief (both cofounders who wrote a combined total of >1,000 articles & defined the voice of HD), & at least 3 other editors. These guys put in WORK since 2017, so cool to be corrected by ppl who joined in Nov 2023 [Link to mentioned vague tweet from post.] More from TayFabe: owner continuously lobbied for using ai in every possible way. No one else wanted to do it, but he kept on, saying ai was writing better satire than 25% of the HT/HD writers. Also, ai images were used on the site & socials without public disclosure or consulting the team.

The owner has responded now multiple times in a private discord... Thank you for people sharing screenshots! First Screenshot:

Kevin's Response: He banned me from the server for speaking out, so no, I didn't see it. And he gave no indication of a timeline, it was just "we'll do one when *I* say so" and gave every inclination he was totally against it. It bred an environment that pushed our hands to have to leave. Screenshot Round Two:

Kevin's Response: "Starting one in 3 months" is an absolute lie. He denied it, I have screenshots and others who can confirm. No timeline was given. Just "this is what it is now" and like, I couldn't live off of that. I wanted to do more but he was allergic to good ideas from others around him.

Matt, owner of Hard Drive, responds publicly on Twitter.

Matt: Kevin, the patreon launch was delayed because I didn't think it would work. Everyone is happy that it did work. Everyone who left the site because we didn't have money to pay for creative content which didn't revenue is welcome to return home. But unclear why the hostility.

Hard Drive paid out literally every dollar it had, then a bunch more, to creative people who worked on the site. When we ran out of money, we couldn't pay anymore. We did our best.

Kevin: Right, and my point of this thread was that it was completely and totally avoidable. This is reasonable to be upset about. How could I have been any more clear?

Matt: If we knew with 100% certainly that the community would have supported us via patreon, we would have done that. We didn't know. We had tried 4 years ago and got no support. We were wrong this time. We did our best to figure it out. We paid all the money we could.

Kevin: So you knew with 100% certainty this time? Or you took a leap of faith?

Matt: It was a last gasp panic effort after ad rates got cut in half on january 1st due to seasonal spending changes. We didn't know it would work. We were embarrassed to ask for support. We wanted to figure it out.

Kevin: Every site has a Patreon. Every YouTuber, comedy group, etc. But you insisted that nobody cared about Hard Drive. Which is wildly untrue. I know you see that now, but again, I think you can see why I and many others are pretty upset. A last ditch panic effort was long overdue. A couple more things from Matt:

It was about the size of the hole we needed plugged budget wise, the time I had left of personal resources, and the past data I had about us trying a patreon (which turned out to be a bad indicator). I didn't think the Patreon would help us fast enough. I made a bad estimation

aka "if we make $1000 more dollars a month via patreon, which would be 10x what we got last time, we will not solve any of our problems. If instead we try to plow down path B, we might make it out in time." That was the thinking. I chose the wrong path, but didn't mean to Kevin also retweeted this comment from the user Matt was responding to: So you're saying that you're bad at running the business, didn't listen to any of your employees until after they were forced to leave their jobs, and now you're going to get more of the money from the Patreon that was their idea in the first place? Matt's Response: Respectfully, I made a mistake delaying the patreon decision. But keeping a comedy site alive for 9 years is not easy, there are lots of potential ideas, and think overall we've done a good and honorable job. Will leave this thread in peace now to allow people their space.

Sorry for linking to Elon's hellsite (derogatory), but sources need links so...

#video games #patreon #hard drive #ai critical

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ohbother2 · 3 months

Text

Lucifer x f!reader - Forced Proximity

PART II

PART I

This was supposed to come out at the weekend, but holy shit the previous part already has 1k likes so here you go a few days early.

This is just smut, no plot, you've been warned. Minors DNI.

Btw I'd love to hear your feedback! I'm not very experienced at this type of writing, so I'd love to know what you think!

(Srsly, thank you guys for the amount of love on the previous part, don't think I've ever had a piece of writing be so popular)

Tag list - @xx-all-purpose-nerd-xx

"You know," You complain, letting him guide your face back down towards him, you prop your weight on your hands either side of his head, not allowing him to pull you into another kiss quite so soon. "you could've let him leave the door open. I'd quite like to be able to see you."

His free hand slides down from its place against your shoulder blade, and he hums contemplatively as it slowly trails down your spine, finally resting on your hip. His eyes are heavy-lidded, and he looks as though he's struggling to focus.

"You can look at me later." He tries to crane his neck upward, but you're determined and turn your head slightly, his lips only finding the corner of your mouth. He groans in frustration.

Realising you weren't going to kiss him any time soon, he presses his lips against the side of your throat, giggling into your skin when you gasp in surprise. He doesn't stop though, and you feel his fangs graze against your jugular teasingly.

"Are you not uncomfortable?" Both of his hands are now on your thighs, rocking you gently.

"God, no." He mumbles against your throat, too distracted with covering the areas of sparse unblemished skin he had glimpsed when the cupboard had been opened. "I'm very happy here."

"We could've gone somewhere with more room." Your eyes close, sinking into his touch as he peppers kisses along your collarbone. You start moving your hips lightly to join his movements. He exhales deeply, one palm pressing against the small of your back to press you down onto him.

"And where would we be?" His voice is quiet, husky, and muffled against your shoulder. The question was non-commital, not expecting you to answer.

"Your desk."

He inhales sharply and his claws dig into your thighs painfully, you feel him stop breathing beneath you. His lips detach from your neck and when you glance down his wide eyes are staring straight at you, suddenly far more alert.

"Y-You," His voice audibly cracks, mind reeling at the images that assaulted him. Images that he had been burying for the past several years. He almost feels sad; he definitely should've made a move sooner. You smile at how strained he is, voice an octave higher than it should've been. His trousers were suddenly painfully tight. "should stop talking."

"Flustered?" You hum cheekily, a hand resting against the side of his face, fingers carding through his disheveled locks as you lean impossibly closer, teasing him with a kiss. His head tilts with your hand hopelessly, and you watch his eyes flutter. Your lips graze against his own and a high-pitched pathetic little sound catches in his throat. Your lips ghost away from his own, across his cheek, and finally press firmly against the crook of his jaw.

"No." He breathes deeply, but his composure falters again when one of your hands slithers between your bodies, tugging gently at his belt. He was a bad liar. "But you keep talking like that-" He gasps, high and airy, as you slowly pull the zipper down his front, fingers grazing generously at the tent in his boxers. "and this'll end before it even begins." His voice pitches and warbles when you lick a line up from the hickey you had been leaving at the juncture between his throat and shoulder.

Your hand rests teasingly against his waistband, a finger slipping just below the hem and pulling playfully. He whines, a hand gripping your hair and pulling your face up to meet him. "Please," He gasps as another one of your fingers teases at the band of his boxers. You can feel his knees spread behind you, allowing room for you to press against his upper thighs. "kiss me."

He was staring at you desperately, the hand in your hair beckoning you closer, but not forcing. Oh how you wished you could see his expression, and you wanted to punish him for not allowing the door to remain open. You catch a glimpse of his furrowed brows, barely visible in the dim light that emanated from his big eyes, and you bite your lip thoughtfully.

"Sweetheart, I'll beg if you want." You didn't doubt it, leaving your fingers pressing against his quivering stomach.

"Next time," You instruct, and you can see the way his eyes flash red at the prospect before settling back to their amber hue. "I choose where, even if that means you have to wait."

"Anything." The word is half whispered, half mumbled against your lips as you finally lean down. He doesn't waste any time, hand gripping your hair tight and forcing you closer, guiding your head to tilt to the side and forcing your lips to open. His tongue snakes its way back into your mouth, and you have to grip his hair for stability, barely able to reciprocate the bruising force of the kiss, never mind keep up. He groans again at your fingers against his scalp, he hums something incoherent, and you're only allowed a second to gasp for breath before he's pulling you in again.

You were too distracted to notice the way his free hand slithered down your body, gracefully unbuttoning and unzipping your trousers. You were even too distracted to notice the way his fingers had pulled at your underwear, but you do notice when a cool finger presses exactly where you needed it to. You moan into his mouth, and you can feel his lips smile as he rubs a small tight circle over your bundle of nerves. "Luci." You whimper as he pulls back for a breath, your damp foreheads pressed together as you try and steady your heart. He pulls you back into a kiss, muffling a whimper when two of his fingers push deeper, gliding easily against your wet folds, pressing against your entrance as his palm rubs against your clit.

"This wet already for me?" He tries to sound seductive, but the breathlessness of his chest and panting of his breath betrays him. "I've barely touched you, love." A fingertip presses in lightly, and your legs spread wider invitingly, but he pulls back to circle two fingers against your peak. He swallows your whine with another breathless kiss.

You writhe on top of him, and his hips jerk involuntarily when you plead his name against his lips. One finger finally breaches your entrance, sliding in easily, and you rut against his hand to speed up the agonisingly slow pace he was taking.

Lucifer had been playing along, grinning against your lips and flexing his fingers enticingly, showing you what he could do but not quite giving you a pace that would accomplish anything. He glides a second up alongside his first finger, and his own moan catches in his throat at the way you tighten around him. You mewl at the pleasurable stretch. Truthfully, he had been thinking ever since you had made your comment about his desk, and the many ideas he had come up with on his own whilst sat there pining after you. He had an idea. He wasn't going to let you interrupt this plan.

His fingers suddenly pull away, leaving you empty and confused, chest heaving as you sit up, staring down at him.

"Off." He pats at your thighs, tugging at your trousers and shimmying them as far as they would go. The smile in his voice was palpable, but you didn't question his sudden giddiness, lifting your hips to help him. It was a little awkward with the small space you both had, but you eventually wiggle free of the tight garment, underwear following in a heap in the corner.

You sit back against him, completely bare on your lower half whilst your top still bunched around your elbows. You lower yourself all the way, folds pressing against the tent in his boxers and grinning wickedly. He doesn't react as you'd hoped though, staring up at you with large shining eyes, admiration in their depths, as well as something else you couldn't quite distinguish, something a little more, mischievous.

Without warning he thrusts his hips up, and you nearly crash into his chest at the sudden forceful jerk. His hands grasp your bare ass firmly, claws digging into the supple flesh. You're so impossibly close to his face you can just make out the grin adorning his features.

"What are you-" You go to sit back against his hips, but his hands stop you, forcing you up instead of down. His own breathing had picked up in anticipation. You hover above him, not sure what he wanted you to do.

"Come on, sweetheart." The words slip from his lips fast and energetic, and his strong arms pull you higher up his torso, now hovering above his sternum. "I promise it'll be worth it."

"Wha-" Realisation hits you like a freight train and your breath leaves you horribly quickly. You had never done this before, and you most definitely had never had someone excitedly trying to yank you up their body. "Luci- I-I don't-"

"Please?" He pleads, and you twitch when he turns his head to place a quick peck against the inside of your knee.

"You want to-?

He doesn't even let you finish. "Yes." His hands tug you closer, inch by inch, and you tentatively let yourself be risen. "I wasn't lying earlier; would've been on my knees for hours."

The way his voice had taken on a whiny pitch had you clenching around nothing in particular, struggling to believe such a powerful man was here, on his back, desperately trying to persuade you to- to- you couldn't fathom it.

"I've never done this before." You hesitate, your nerves growing in the pit of your stomach as you stare down at his bright eyes. If you could see anything in this darkness, you'd see his ear-splitting grin and the way his tongue flicked against his lips as he positioned you. You'd also notice the way his cheeks and chest had flushed feverishly once he had realised you were actually going to let him do this. Instead, you focussed unwaveringly on his bright eyes, which constantly flicked between your face and the growing heat between your thighs.

Something in his chest jumps, knowing he'd be the first to do this to you. His mounting resolve had just solidified, you were most definitely not getting out of this now. You hover direction above him and he places a clawed hand on either of your thighs, gently coaxing you down.

"Perfect," Some of his cocky self had come back now that he was finally getting what he wanted, and his hot breath fans across your thighs as you slowly lower down, your hands grasping the shelves above your head to stabilise yourself. "just let me take care of you."

You pause your decent when you feel his hair ticking at your thighs, and he takes the opportunity to turn his head slightly to the side, immediately pressing a hot open-mouthed kiss against your inner thigh. You gasp, fingers clenching around the shelf above you, as he sucks your skin into his mouth, teeth grazing over the sensitive skin. He hums, slowly licking and kissing his way towards your core. He presses a delicate kiss against your heat, and you automatically lurch upwards, but his grip around your thighs prevents you from moving at all.

You breathe deeply, and his eyes connect with yours, gently but forcefully pulling you closer.

"it's okay, sit."

You comply, albeit hesitantly, worrying for his head when he pulls you closer, your thighs flush against either side of his rosy face. You stare down at him, wide-eyed, as he stares back. Without warning another kiss presses against your folds, and you jerk again, but he had been anticipating it and his hands flex against you, rooting you in your spot and digging deliciously into the flesh of your upper thighs and hips. He kisses again, and again, each one lengthening and growing more sloppy. You pant above him and he watches your expression gleefully, finally suckling your little bud into his mouth. You jerk as he presses his forked tongue against your most sensitive spot, and a moan heaves from your chest when he grazes his teeth against you, lavishing that one particular spot with unfaltering enthusiasm.

Just as you begin to whine, hips twitching at the ministrations, he shifts lower, long tongue lolling from his mouth and licking a decisive stripe up against your entire length, parting your folds and gathering your juices on his tongue. You moan his name sinfully, and he whines, hips raising against nothing as his tongue finally delves its way into you, slithering inside your walls and licking up into your heat. You gasp in surprise: his tongue was long, sinfully so, and its forked edge delved deep as he explored.

His claws grip you tighter as you shift around, pinning your hips in place as his tongue presses against that special spot inside of you. You whine, and you can feel his teeth press against your opening as he grins, a mumbled "found it" lost against your damp flesh, tongue licking harder against that spot. His eyes close completely, brows furrowing as he concentrates, sinking into the floor and making sure to drag your hips down with him.

"Oh- Luci-" You gasp, fingers tightening against the shelf as he withdraws his tongue, sucking your clit back into his mouth like a man starved. He uses his forearms to make sure your hips stay down, hands coming to grasp the insides of your thighs and forcing them to stay apart as they threatened to twitch close. He hums against you, and the sounds of his lips against your core is downright sinful; you spread your thighs further and he groans when he realises he can reach more of you with his mouth.

"Yes, hngh, yes-" You moan, hips beginning to grind down to meet his tongue. "There-!"

"mhm" He hums in acknowledgement beneath you, grasp tightening on your thighs as he abuses your clit. His own chest was heaving as he worked, and his forehead creased as he concentrates, swirling his tongue in circles and sucking just the right amount before it became painful.

He cracks one eye open, suddenly incredibly aware of the lack of your hands against him, and he follows your twisting torso up, frowning at seeing you grip the shelving unit above his head. He doesn't stop, tongue continuing to lick its fiery trail against you, and his eye closes again as he lifts his hands from your thighs, travelling up the length of your body.

You shiver at the contact, head thrown back and eyes flickering wildly behind your eyes as you continued to grind down against him. You feel his hands travel up your shoulder blades, down your biceps, your forearms, coming to rest against your wrists with a tight grip. You allow him to pull your hands away from the shelf, and your eyes open as he draws them down to his hair, tugging them against the strands and tangling your fingers in his locks before his own claws are settling around your thighs again.

Had he just wanted you to touch him? You wonder, though it was hard to form a coherent thought as his tongue thrust into you. Experimentally, your fingers tighten against his blonde locks, and he moans hoarsely, teeth grazing your folds as he drags you impossibly closer.

This new position allowed to you to glance between your arms at his face, and you pause confused when no dim light meets you. Then, your core clenches as you realise what he was doing. You couldn't see his eyes. He had closed his eyes. The realisation has your own eyes rolling to the back of your head and your fingers tighten against his hair, pulling painfully at the roots. He whines, a high-pitched cracking groan, hips jerking up voluntarily.

He carries on working his tongue against you until you dissolve into a panting mess, sweat beading down your forehead as you hips jerk against his mouth, that familiar tight coil winding quickly in the pit of your stomach. You moan weakly as he continues to abuse your cunt, and the muscles in your thighs tighten as you feel that coil suddenly tighten to its capacity.

"Luci." You warn, hands tugging at his locks so tightly that he opens his eyes to gaze up at you, a bleary pair of ruby eyes looking up at you questioningly. "S-stop, I'm close."

"nuh-uh" He hums against you, eyes slipping closed as his hands fasten their hold around you. His tongue leaves your entrance, your clit once again finding itself in his mouth as he sucks harshly. You got the message: 'no chance'.

"Luci!" Your voice raises a pitch, and your hands pull so tightly against his scalp that it hurts; he whimpers, hips shifting as he continues his ruthless pace against your heat.

"W-wait, shit-" You gasp uselessly, teetering on the edge of losing complete control. Lucifer seems to realise, and he pulls out a move that he'd been saving. His mouth opens as wide as it would allow, and his tongue slithers out and into your folds, immediately pressing against your g-spot as his upper lip closes around your clit, working the small bud between his upper lip and the base of his tongue. The double stimulation has all air forced from your lungs, and it only takes one press of his tongue against your g-spot before your crashing down from that blissful tightness. Your toes curl as he licks against your spasming walls, claws lightly breaking your skin as he wrestles your thighs to stay apart. He moans into you and you see stars, hips faltering as you let him do as he pleases.

You can't form words as he guides you through your orgasm, body tight and hunched forward, his head grasped tightly between your hands as you moan and whimper. "God." You groan as he grazes his fangs against you clit, sparks shooting up your entire spine at the oversensitivity.

When it finally ends you slump forward tiredly, hands still knotted into his hair as he presses one last longing kiss against you. He guides you down his chest with his hands until you lay flat against his chest, breathing ragged and core fluttering as you try and regain your bearings.

"Good, sweetheart?" Lucifer hums against your temple, but you can hear the shit-eating grin in his breathy voice, and you just know the he knows he was good.

"Yes." You mutter, placing a kiss at the base of his throat as you breathe deeply, heart rate beginning to come back down. "Absolutely amazing, Luci."

You can feel him shift at the compliment, a breath catching in his throat, and you arch a brow inquisitively. You prop yourself back up, and immediately place your lips over his, kissing him deeply and taking him by surprise. You can feel the wetness that coated his chin and lips, and a hand against the side of his face tells you he was practically covered in you, the skin damp and warm beneath your touch. He grunts against your lips, returning the kiss with as much excitement.

"You were so good to me." You hush against his lips when you pull away, and you grin when his breath hitches and his pupils dilate. You had him.

"We can't leave you like this, can we? Not after you were so good." You grin more when he gulps, hands landing on your hips when you shimmy down his torso, pressing your soaking heat against his still clothed, painfully-hard erection.

"Am I that easy to read?" He questions through deep breaths, a hand tucking a stray piece of hair behind your ear.

"Just to me. I did notice how you always got so flustered at compliments." You reveal, pressing a kiss to the corner of his mouth.

You turn awkwardly, straddling him backwards as you make quick work of his trousers and boxers. You tuck your hands into the waistband and gently tug down, unable to really see what you were doing so moving carefully not to accidentally hurt something. He lifts his hips to help you, and hisses when the cool cupboard air finally reaches his throbbing cock.

Unbeknownst to you, he had grown impatient as you struggled with his hips, and pushed himself up by his elbows to gain more access to you whilst you finished sorting his trousers. You feel him kissing the back of your thigh as you push them past his knees, and you have to force yourself to breath as you finish pulling them down to his ankles.

You pull away from his reaching hands which had tried to tug you back towards his face, swatting at him playfully as you turn and reposition yourself.

"Can't blame a guy for trying." You can hear his smile as he rests back, his hands sliding up your thighs and resting against your hips, thumbs pressing into the divot of your hipbone.

You could hear his deep puffs of breath in the darkness, still trying to recover from the energy he had used when treating you, and you decide that you wanted to work him up a bit more before you rewarded him in return.

"I really wish you'd let him leave the door open." You start complaining again, resting against his thighs instead of his hips, a hand running slowly down his sternum and tickling the sticky skin that quivered under your touch. "I want to see how pretty you look like this."

He stares at you from the darkness, utterly dumb-founded, mouth agape and his breath quickening.

"Trust me, I'm a mess." He forces out a nervous chuckle, but you can feel the way his fingers flex at the compliment, and your confidence only grows.

"I don't think so." You slide your palms up either of his sides, feeling the way his lungs expand as you slowly wind your arms behind his neck, drawing yourself down closer until you can feel his nose brush against your own. "I bet you look gorgeous. More handsome than you usually look, and I can barely keep my eyes off of you normally, you're just such a pretty boy."

"W-What?" He questions quietly, breathing deep when you tilt your head and kiss against the shell of his ear. His hands fall slack against your thighs, too enraptured by your words to bother to control your movements.

"Hmm," You hum, and your warm breath against his ear has him shivering. You kiss just beneath his ear, whispering huskily. "Such a handsome man. The most powerful man in Hell, and yet he's beneath me, eager to please, letting me do whatever I want, being so good."

His cheeks burst into a fiery red at your compliments whispered against the shell of his ear, chest almost caving in with the way he struggles for breath. All he can think of is you, all he can feel is you: your hands resting against his chest and against his throat, your lips and tongue peppering their way along his angular jaw, your hair brushing his forehead as you move closer.

Your hand sneaks down his chest lazily, finally grazing against his throbbing member resting heavy against his stomach. He stutters when your fingers graze against him, and you grin into the skin on his jaw when you feel how damp he is, pre-cum covering his length and puddling across his stomach. He was already fully mast, and you hadn't even had to touch him.

"Eager?" You question, hand finally wrapping around him as he pulls you in for a heated kiss, whining into your mouth when you give a leisurely stroke, thumb swiping across his slit. His hips jerk at the small action and he bites at your lips when you grip him firmer, pulling once, twice.

"You're the Devil." He gasps against your lips, tongue already flicking out to lick across your bottom lip, fully intending to pull you into another kiss.

"I think you'll find that's actually you."

You let him snake his way into your cavern, tongue filling your mouth as you shift your hips, stroking his cock agonisingly slowly, coaxing him into position without him even knowing. You take him by surprise when he feels his tip pressing against your opening, and his eyes shoot open with his tongue still mid-way towards your throat. You grin against his lips as you sink down, sheathing him in one steady rock of your hips. A pathetic little sound screeches in his throat, eyes screwing shut at the pleasurable pressure and hands regaining their death-like grip on your hips. He whimpers against your lips when you rock your hips again, beginning to set a slow, steady rhythm.

"Oh- oh, darling." He whines the pet-name through clenched teeth, hips jerking erratically as you try and find a rhythm.

You loved the little sounds he made, and you decide to let him know, carding a hand through his tussled locks, breathing against his lips. "Such pretty little noises."

You catch a glimpse of his eyes rolling back before they're hidden behind lilac-hued eyelids, a pitiful whimper rewarding your compliment, and his hips slowly begin to match your rhythm. You attempt to sit up, to really take control, but his hand at the crook of your neck prevents you from pulling too far away from him, and he grasps desperately when he realises your attempt to pull away. You could pull away if you really wanted to, plant your hands on his chest and begin setting the pace you wanted, but his needy little whines and the way he clung to your neck has you leaning forward and succumbing to the slow and steady rhythm.

It didn't take long for Lucifer to become a panting whimpering mess, not with the way your walls clung to him so achingly, hips rolling against him in such a deliciously delightful way, and lips meeting his own like an unholy prayer.

"C-close." He warns, gasping against your lips and continuing to raise his hips to meet yours. Both of his hands grasp your hips, but he allows you to set the pace, clinging on for stability more so than control.

"It's okay, Luci." You assure him, grinding harder as you edge him towards release.

"No." You feel him shake his head, hair swishing against your jaw as he licks and sucks at your throat. A hand leaves your hip and circles around to your front, thumb pressing harshly into your sensitive clit and circling it, hard. "'m not done with you yet."

You feel his thighs spread behind you, his feet planting firmly on the floor as he thrusts harder than before, pummelling that pleasant spot inside of you with renewed urgency. He was close; he couldn't cum before you did again.

"Luci," You gasp in surprise, hands fighting to find purchase and ultimately finding their way back into his hair. The rest of your sentence dies in your throat, his thumb circling harshly against your sensitive bundle of nerves, his cock drawing pleasure from the deepest parts within.

"Come on, sweetheart, please just one more. For me." His voice was a wreck, a plea muttered between gasps and chocked-back whimpers. It was the gentlest, and yet most sultry thing you had ever heard. His desperation was palpable, his throat tight, the muscles in his neck and chest rigid, his toes curling inside his shoes as he tried to fight back the pleasure rapidly building in his stomach.

"I-I-" You don't think you can until the very last second where his dick hits that deep spot inside of you in one particularly hard thrust, and then your vision blotches around the edges as pleasure sparks from the tips of your fingers all the way to the soles of your feet, your spine rigid and hips stuttering as you moan and pant. Your body shakes with pleasure, and Lucifer silences your cries of ecstasy with his lips sealing over yours, brows furrowing as he continues to rub tight little circles over the centre of your pleasure.

Your walls flutter and spasms around him, and Lucifer grunts and groans as he tries to fight back his own high, both hands falling back to your hips as he tries to concentrate, brows knitted together and mouthing thoughtlessly against your lips. You had no chance to recover from your own orgasm, his hips stuttering up into your with a frantic urgency, thrusts sloppy and out of rhythm. His resolve completely shatters when you decide to sink your teeth into his bottom lip, and then his voice is breaking and his hips are humping pathetically as his own orgasm crashes over him.

Some attempt at your name is whimpered against your rouge lips, his arms encircling your waist fully as he pumps into you once, twice, hard aborted thrusts attempted on shaking legs. When he's finally spent, with nothing more to give, he pulls away from your lips, forehead pressing heavily against your own as he gasps in a shuddering breath, panting pathetically and gazing at you with blurred eyes.

His arms don't fall from your waist as he sinks back into the cool ground, all muscles in his body lax, the aftershocks of pleasure thrumming through his weary muscles. You lay flat against his heaving chest, fighting to catch your own breath, beginning to feel the bruising muscle of your thighs, continuing to straddle him, neither one of you wanting to pull away.

"Sweetheart," His voice is rough, and he has to clear his throat before he continues. A hand slowly slides up and down your spine as he talks, clawed fingers gentle and delicate as you shiver at the sensation. "if I'm ever as dumb as I have been for the past six years, I want you to shoot me."

You giggle at how serious he sounds, tilting your head to look up at him. His eyes are upturned towards the ceiling.

"I mean it. Can't believe I waisted so much time with you because I was scared." He laughs around the last word, embarrassed and not quite believing his own sheer stupidity.

"You were scared?" You question quietly, a finger tracing an imaginary pattern against his side, your eyes closed to the world as you breathe deeply.

"Of course, look at you: you're so fun, so happy, absolutely perfect at everything you do. Hell, you even join in with my lame jokes and terrible dancing. You're too good to be true, especially down here."

"If it makes a difference, I could've acted, but I was scare too."

The cupboard falls into silence for a moment, nothing but the sounds of your slowing breathing filling the silence. His palms slide up your back slowly, claws grazing the skin lightly, teasingly, repeating the motion along the expanse of your back and hips, again and again.

"There's plenty of time to make up for lost time, we've got forever." You mumble against his chest, sighing as both of his hands massage over the bruises he had unwittingly left across your thighs. Your tone turns cheeky, and you pick your head up to look at him properly. "How long do you think we have left in here?"

He seems to take the hint, gaze snapping down towards you. You grin when you see his eyes brighten in the darkness. "Give me five minutes."

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